#either way it probably won't happen
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help i saved the best shinee url but i am not ready to part ways with get-lit i grew way too attached sldafjhdfhsdfjshdf
#🍑.txt#it's.... @shyknee#and i find it hilarious sadlfdsfjsadkjfahsjdfhsjfhdsjfh#but it's also late at night everything is hilarious#either way it probably won't happen#but how funny would that be saldfjshdjfshdjfh
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I have some questions about karaoke night, Alex Hirsch. Very Important Questions. Which I will happily scream at a poor hapless baby triangle who can have no answers for me, and possibly also does not have object permanence yet.
Follow-up that is I guess suggestive, but let's be real here, Bill's a fucking triangle:
Dude slipped right into his birthday suit, lmao
this is so stupid :D
Anyway, I don't care what anyone says, this brilliant individual knows what's up - Bill is absolutely way more of a monsterfucker than Ford could or ever will be, full stop.
#fanart#billford#bill cipher#stanford pines#gravity falls#book of bill#i watched gravity falls because i was curious about all the Toxic Old Man Yaoi on my dash and wanted context#turns out most of the context was in the book of bill tho lmao#look they either banged or married or both while drunk and i will accept no other possibilities#you don't use the phrase 'and one thing led to another' in a PRIVATE JOURNAL if what happened wasn't salacious in some way#i mean - ford didn't exactly grow up in The Most Inclusive Time Period???#dude was probably like 'gotta use this wording for plausible deniability - NO ONE can know i boinked the talking triangle'#in other news - i must bully the baby billy#don't know how much more GF stuff i'll toss up here but i have a few other little scribbles in the works. probably won't color them tho lol#also don't ask me why bill's bowtie stays where it is despite his “pants��� being under it. just. just fucking don't ok???#EDIT: oh and since i see this a lot in this fandom for some reason: DO NOT REPOST THIS PLZ K THX :D
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I've seen a few people on Twitter very confidently assume that caitlyn will be the one to end things with vi, I've seen a few people say things along the lines of "when caitlyn throws vi out" and i understand why people might think that, that could absolutely happen, it could very well mirror how vi ended things the first time, but for me, that just doesn't feel right, caitlyn being being so cruel to vi that she throws her out (assuming that vi would be reliant on caitlyn for food and shelter) seems too much for me to believe that sweet, kind caitlyn from season 1 is completely gone and is now throwing people she cares about out.
Maybe it's because I've only watched the show 3 weeks ago, unlike other people who had years to think about the idea of being cold/detached/cruel and get used to that idea and accept it. I haven't accepted the idea of her being cruel to the people she's cares about.
Whenever i think about the caitvi breakup, i always assume that vi would be the one to leave, that she can't handle becoming one of the people who killed her family, that she can't handle having to go after her sister and can't handle seeing what caitlyn has become,
But who knows i could be wrong but until i watch act 1 I'm not gonna confidently assume that caitlyn is "throwing vi out"
#honestly i kinda do have a little feeling that that might happen but i mostly still don't buy that idea!#either way I'm excited to see caitlyns arc!#i can't wait to watch the show i might have to block arcane and caitvi on every goddamn social media because i probably won't be#able to watch it the second it's released..#arcane#arcane s2#caitvi#caitlyn kiramman#vi arcane#👑
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Sparkstember Day 10: Whomp That Sucker (Where's My Girl)
A good time!!! That's the first thing I associate with this album. It's one of the earlier ones I've heard too and I was certainly a big fan of it from the very start. Not only that, but I think it was a bit of a groundbreaking point in my experience as a new Sparks fan, since I was trying to figure out where to go next and this was a good plunge somewhere in the midst of it all that proved that no matter where you go, you're going to get something special! And after a couple more months (I mean, it's been a bit over a year since that first listen already! How time flies) it still holds up in my personal rankings. Soooo well. Definitely very special to me!
I think it's safe to say by now that between the pair of Whomp and Angst I'll always stay partial to Whomp. The latter seems to be much more popular among fans, and I can understand that, but something about Whomp speaks to me much more. Both are fun, energetic new-wavey albums, still in the realm of rock but with some cool use of synths that would soon become even more important and a core element of the music. Still though, I think Whomp is more PURE fun - between many hilarious lyrics and the overall playful and lighthearted nature of it, I don't think it's possible to listen to this one and not feel even a little bit happier afterwards.
I especially love the whole atmosphere of it, what I call the spacey / sparkly synth, that gives it a little bit of an outer space feel, much moreso than the actual album called In Outer Space (but i'd better not get ahead of myself yet when it comes to that one, lol). This album really feels sparkly and even glittery to me in a weird way, and unexplainably, this all reminds me of like, sweets and chocolates like those cosmic brownies or daim candy?? That's what this album would taste like to me! Sweet and a little extra and always a good little treat. Damn, and now I want to try a cosmic brownie.
Favourite songs (and other highlights):
I don't even have that many personal favourites from this album even though I really really love it as a whole!! I guess it's a bit of a Propaganda situation, where there isn't that many super big standouts compared to the rest of the tracks, they're all just very cool and I mostly don't have that much to say about them individually, they're all just!! So fun!! (I mean, ok, Suzie Safety might be the only one here that I don't care about all that much. I'm sorry, Suzie.) So this is more of a Moments list than anything
I Married A Martian: mostly I'm just incredibly charmed by the story here
Where's My Girl: AARGHHH!!! WAAUUGHGH!!! I LOVE THIS SONG!!!! SO MUCH!!!! The closest I can come to describing the feeling here is something like... song you heard a couple times when you were very young, enough that you remember how it goes when you hear it again, but can't recall it on the spot otherwise, and you forget about the song's existence until you hear it again after all those years and are hit by the biggest wave of nostalgia and longing for the past that you've ever experienced in your life. All that despite me never hearing this song until last year. Or is there just something I'm not aware of... Anyway, this was one of those rare and treasured moments of THIS IS WHAT I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR!! *MY* MUSIC!! Needless to say, this song stayed on repeat countless of times and I will never get over how awesome this guitar solo is. And again, the spacey synth!!
Upstairs: upstAAAAAAirs!!! upstAAAAAAirs!!!
Don't Shoot Me: big fan of the whole thing but I'm especially charmed by the little high-pitched "shoot!"s and such in the background, and "WHO'S HEEE???"
The Willys: the song itself isn't even my fav but the PHYSICALLY! MENTALLY! MORALLY! part is always very chuckle-worthy. That's the wondrous humour I'm talking about here
That's Not Nastassia: Sparks songs with uncomfortably long endings my beloved... can also be pretty hilarious under the right circumstances (like listening to the vinyl of this album with my dad and watching his reaction). And can't forget how cool the transition into the last song is
#sorry for the legth of this post. it will most definitely happen again#ok i can't even tell if it's that much longer than the rest. sorry either way#(for the length of them all. they WILL get longer still. that i'm sure of)#i actually scrapped the previous sketch for today last minute because i felt like something was off about it!!#and i wanted something cooler for one of my favourite songs and albums#so i experimented a bit with more detail and a ton of filters on the layers in this one#and i probably won't go that extra for any future drawings lol#a bit too demanding to me still at this moment. i don't want to die from too much screentime doing this#sparkstember 2024#my art#goose monologues
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(I saw them content warnings and the first thing that came to my mind to the mention of weed was peppino sitting on a bean bag smoking some zaza
WAIT I JUST ASLO THINKED OF PEP FUCKING STONED TOO HVVFGUKVYFUG)
(Ajfdjdf, that's pretty much spot on! Peppino sometimes gotta chill tf out, and Gus knows where the good stuff is!
I'm not sure about Pep tho, I am imagining all his animal DNA would not gel with the weed, and he just ends up sick
But that also means he could be affected by catnip instead, and that is very funny to me)
#ooc post#but yeah Peppino and Gustavo don't smoke too often#just when they wanna chill or have a particularly bad pain flare up y'know#and when someone can watch Brick bc she is not allowed any!!!#I guess Pep can watch her bc he would not be allowed any either#so that solves that!#either way it probably won't happen a lot in the context of the story!#okay time to make dinner bc I'm hungry!!!#and then update maybe#drugs //#drug use //#drug mention //#weed //#weed mention //#smoking //
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the way it kinda just dawned on me we're never seeing alistair again
#which in its own way makes sense and it's lucky we had him for all 3 games if he survived origins#i mean i wouldn't want his VA back anyway but god damn brain why is this hitting now#but also while realising this i suddenly felt petty on behalf of the zevran romancers like#there was all this speculation (for good reason!) that zevran would appear in DA4 but considering we can't choose anything about dao/da2#i imagine he just straight up won't be acknowledged at all considering we can either kill him when we meet him or when he 'betrays' you#or they're gonna turn around and say he's canonically alive. which they'll probably do with blackwall/iron bull too despite what can happen#but that's a whole thing and not the point but man i was having such a nice day for a change and this is hitting way harder than it should#i wonder if there's going to be any new info/resolution on curing the calling. man's in his 40's now and has 10 years left if he's lucky#considering griffons are back i suppose anything is possible#dragon age veilguard#alistair theirin
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Oh fuck tomorrow I'm going to be a little birthday boy I keep almost forgetting
#it's probably bc i dont have specific plans im just playing it by ear based on how the newborn will be#(the amount of time I'll be needed w the other kids basically depends on how much sleep the parents got the night before lol)#so i dont wanna be out too late... ahh i miss the club bro i wanna go#i love kids just to be clear which is why i do this but i also think I've gotten any child rearing out of my system#so i dont want my own. in a way it's freeing bc my future will just be for me and i won't have to worry about this stuff long term lol#ah but if I'm free on the 4th theres also something else i wanna do so maybe i shouldn't get drunk anyway#maybe just wait for the next free day 🤷♂️ we'll see#I've been highover BAD though shit lasted until like 8pm the next day. and i had to take the day off w the kids#luckily there happened to be other family there that took over but dude it sucked. i remember trying to help them in the morning like#ok sorry 4 year old trying to find pants i have to lay down in your bed you can do it by yourself i believe in you#so. taking the day off was a good call for their sakes too lol#he was fine just to be clear he could've done it on his own either way. i was just unhelpful 😅 i promise im usually way more attentive
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when i was younger this whole ''no romantic or sexual experience" thing made me feel deeply unlovable and it still does but in a different way. now i've somehow convinced myself that i'm not supposed to desire anyone like that. like it's not meant for me. it's me who can't love now. not other people.
#feeling emo#no but i'm literally the problem cause it's not like i'm trying to ''put myself out there''#but it's too scary and i don't want to and i'm not ready and there's no time and i like the routine of being alone#i've had crushes before and they were strong and lasted honestly too long for being crushes#but that's too far away from now#and i always looked at myself as the girl who won't get the boy#the crush was always unrequited#i was okay with only looking cause it's not like there's anything other than that for a girl like me#living life in a larger body is truly not a kind experience#there's so many other things that made relationship and love scary for me but being fat is the biggest reason for not even trying#and they you talk to your skinny friends and hear their experience with men and it's so awful for the most part#and then you think well if they treat them that way how would i be treated#i just don't want to be hurt#or hurt someone else#i'm used to at looking at love from a distance and i'll live anyway#some days it just harder than others#like the hard part is that i feel like im doing something wrong#like im living life wrong like i shouldn't be this uncomfortable and scared#so often it happens that i just can't relate to other people my age#like im too serious and in my head to be fun and get drunk at parties#and to serious and in my head to be in love and be loved and be seen#they all have this more casual stance on romance and they'll make out with people in the dorm bathrooms but i can't do that#and i don't want to either#i'm slow and boring and it would probably take six months to prepare myself for a kiss#it all seems so big to me#lovely feeling we're having tonight#personal
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A week later and the doctor called me.
Apparently she can't find the MRI-scan in my medical journal, and since it was 5+ years ago she still thinks that it needs to happen again. Fair enough.
Her opinion on the inflamed spine is that it might indeed be a disease, and asked me to get some more blood-work done.
She reiterated that my medicine is statistically bad for my heart long-term, and that whilst she's willing to give it to me "in moderate amounts" we should be looking into other (more modern) medicines. And also that I need to do "exercise".
Considering that I'm going to be talking to a physiotherapist on this in like a month, we'll have to wait and see what kind of form that exercise should be taking.
All-in-all, a productive phone-call. Some curiosity towards what kind of exercises are to be expected to "keep my spine from killing me". And hope that she will indeed be giving me back my pills.
#''resting doesn't help. but it won't make it worse'' ''i disagree. lying down actively hurts me.'' ''hmm...''#also. she very much agreed that it was IMPORTANT to ''keep my inflammation low''#she just also worried a lot more about our healthcare system having a long and sordid history with giving pills out like candy#which... fair enough. and i'm sure that i'll be thankful towards her when i don't get a heartattack in my 40s.#but also like... another major cause for heart-disease? stress and lack of sleep. so... probably gonna happen either way.#personal stuff
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I hope david tells us whatever he can about how s3 was supposed to go if he gets confirmation that there is absolutely no hope of ofmd coming back
#be prepared for a whole lot of nothing to happen for a while tho#if he hasn't said more either way it's because he doesn't know and whatever happens he probably won't for a while#pretty sure if it was an absolute no he'd have said so#but it may become a no eventually 🤷🏻#renewal campaigns are exhausting because of the constant uncertainty#i don't mean give up i mean get ready to wait#like i said I'll keep the kettle on for all those of you currently in the twitter trenches
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Ig Takumi has made an appearance.
Ryoko you are so lucky Izuru is there...
#FDBAG#TPYP#Izuru is probably the ONLY person who could survive in a altercation with Takumi#It's hard to tell if Mukuro could survive him#Just because there's really no way to tell since she's dead in canon#And she's not here#Takumi is generally chill#Unless you are a murderer#Which Junko IS#And therefore Ryoko is as well#It's a very interesting conversation happening#But Izuru of course is not letting anyone die#He probably won't show up again either#scarposts
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fic title: set adrift and alight?
It's not that Liv is listless, per-say. It's just... Okay. Take a step back, then take this step by step.
Blaseball isn't all he's ever known, but it's dominated and defined his life for decades now.
Blaseball is over, the Umpires declaring a new leader, a siesta, and then a quiet ending years later.
Everyone they had known in the Black Hole never came back when everything ended.
And that's. That's fine! She knew when she felt herself slip away and enter freefall that she might not see them again. She landed in the Charlestons and found Ankle there, she helped greet everyone who arrived after her in the years that followed, she had time to make peace with the holes in her life. She made peace with it.
And it's not like he didn't have plenty to do in the aftermath either. Sunken Charleston had been using Blaseball as an anchor of sorts and trying to settle that out and relearn how to two-step across a space that was suddenly spongey and stretch underfoot, like sprinting across a trampoline, that was a whole other experience. He and the team (and the former team, once a thief always a thief after all) had had to really band together to figure out how to safely navigate that space again.
It's just... They'd actually liked playing, was the thing. They don't admit it to anyone else, but they had. On the good days, the days where the Umps weren't burning up dangerous or the slush-ice of immateria wasn't dragging people under, it had been fun. Exciting. The GOOD sort of burn.
Oliver Loofah had long ago made peace with Blaseball maybe killing her and sending her (back) to the Hall. She'd just never actually made plans for surviving it, or what would come after.
Or figuring out how to stay in touch with people who he doesn't know will remember him at all now they have nothing in common.
#ask meme#my writing#oliver loofah#blaseball#what if you had accepted that maybe one day what you do in life would probably kill you#and send you back to the hall where you believed all your old teammates were waiting#and then it just doesnt happen and you suddenly have to figure out#your entire everything#how to life through the aftermath#how to grieve that many lost connections#how to process the sudden pivot in your whole life direction#surrounded by people who (to your perspective) probably aren't feeling the same because they hated it by the end#the mix of relief and dread as you're suddenly free to do whatever you want but you have no way of knowing what that is#and your social circle is so built on this unifying factor you don't know how it'll endure without it#and you don't say anything#because you fear the answer#because you don't know if the confirmation is better than the uncertain hope so you hold your hands still at your sides#because if you know for sure you've lost something else you won't know how to grieve that either#i think about it sometimes#i think about liv a lot still
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#i know there's only 10 episodes this season#but i feel like this could go both ways - either we get bi buck dating tommy and eddie is the supportive straight bff#or we get bi buck dating tommy and eddie being jealous not knowing why and then he figures it out but doesn't tell buck#and then we have to wait next season for revelations love confessions and buddie 👀#a girl can dream i guess lol#or maybe it'll be the former with supportive straight bff and we get the repressed gay arc next season 👀 (if it ever happens)#i suppose it'll also depend on how the audience reacts to bi buck and only then will tim decide if he wants to write repressed gay eddie#bc if the audience doesn't like it then he'll probably keep buck with tommy but we won't see tommy much and eddie will stay straight lol#or he could even make buck fall in love with a woman again since he's bi lol so ppl get bi buck and the homophobes are happy too#anyway we'll see lol whatever happens I'm excited!#tagging this as#911 spec#to get back to it later and see if i was right or not lol#(updating this to add that if they make buddie happen they could have maddie tell buck she thought his bi awakening would happen with eddie+#+and so buck thinks a lot about why she said this and obviously he figures it out lol. that'd be a nice parallel to her+#+saying he has a crush a few seasons ago)
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I need to stop saying "it's whatever/doesn't matter" whenever things go wrong at my expense and others try to apologise for having a part in things going wrong.
#most recent example. my father is currently fixing my room's walls#and he's handling big bulky insulation boards and knocked down some of my nail polish bottles.#they could've shattered since the fell from a decent height. it would've devastated me#but all i said was ''it's whatever'' and my father said ''actually it's not!''#and tbh this is making me think............#the way i so deeply care about my belongings but act unaffected whenever something happens to them#literally readily submitting myself to the harm it does to my brain and putting myself down preemptively in a way?#like yeah okay shit happened cannot change it now. not allowed to get mad over it. no use crying over spilled milk. won't fix anything.#like the most hardcore shōganai mindset ever. i wish i wasn't this way lol#(at least i'm not highly reactive and explode into anger and attack mode on the spot anymore)#(i can still recall when it happened and i probably scared off many people with my dramatic and hostile reaction. i'm ashamed)#(no wonder i didn't have many friends as a child. i was so easily triggered and overly sensitive#and depending on the trigger i either isolated myself or when others still kept bothering me i lashed the hell out.)#(i did do some serious physical damage to other kids back in kindergarten due to these outbursts on a few occasions...)#NO WONDER I RELATE TO RANDY SO MUCH AAAHHHHHH IT'S ALL COMING BACK TO ME HELP I AM REMEMBERING
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Me BSing hcs like: The fact that Kae is not only able to create a shield when he is dangerously low HP but also the fact that he is able to regenerate HP when he hits opponents with Frostgnaw is definitely due to him receiving his Vision when Diluc had tried to kill him in their Confrontation...but could it be possible that his familial ties to the Abyss Order could have influenced that HP drain of his-
#//And that's without mentioning the fact that Glacial Waltz's duration increases FOR EVERY OPPONENT DEFEATED#//Between that and his lil teleporting trick like an Abyss mage's (minus the flurries of ice); I have SO many thinkings#//Deffo love the abilities of his being an amalgam of Vision based and Abyssal energy imbued#//Deffo love that fact meaning it hurts a bit to use his Vision at all; esp with the teleporting being such a Staple to his combat style#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. );#//Sidetracking a bit; but I also like to think that even after the Abyss is defeated/beaten back enough to not be such a threat; he'd still#keep his abilities from it/some connection to it. Bc he's so used to it being such a big PART of his fighting style/assets to use in a pinc#//But also bc keeping that connection means it'd help him keep track of any remnants of the Order far easier#//He could track them down with far more ease; sense if they are growing stronger; get intel from Domains/abyssal traces#//Of course being very mindful to keep it a secret & trying to not involve his loved ones/fellow knights of it all#//But he very much is careful esp bc of risks of him being corrupted by it; keeping a keen eye on his mental/physical/emotional states#//Deffo has plans to leave Mond and/or end his own life if he starts seeing the Abyssal corruption affecting him irreversibly#suicide mention tw#//Kind of but also kind of not; considering some of the ways how he'd go abt it#//Knows it'd be harder to the further it goes; so he has particular criteria he keeps tracks of to ensure if they come to pass#//he; in a clearer state of mind; would either 1) use his Vision to try & purge the energy out of himself (extremely painful; COULD kill#if the corruption runs deep enough & save him the trouble) or 2) use the aggressiveness of the corruption to provoke someone (esp Luc)#into taking care of him &thus ending the problem all together. Bc he KNOWS he's strong; only a handful of beings could actually kill him#//& actually be WILLING to; without hesitation. Luc comes to mind first bc of their Confrontation. But also bc Kae'd be happy w him being#the last person he ever sees. Thinks it'd be comforting more than anyone else. Esp since a lover would just break his heart to see them#//Worst case scenario is him falling to the corruption & sb breaking it out of him in the moment#//Bc the Instant he realizes what's happening; esp if they are crying and/or angered at him; he WILL fatally wound himself#//And make SURE it's not something he can come back from; save by a miracle (or 'curse' as he'd see it)#//Probably making an icicle and slitting his own throat; if not jamming the thing into his heart#//he won't hesitate; wont offer explanations; final words or apologies; he cant risk that moment of clarity being too short for it#//he HAS to make sure he can't hurt anyone any further; no matter what it means for him#//Which is partly why he'd be so keen to make sure it's not found out; bc he KNOWS he can be talked out of keeping those abilities#//Or worse; he'd fight them on it; and thus make for a fucken MESS in the aftermath if he's been too far along in the corruption#//But he KNOWS that even with the risks; the powers are a VALUABLE asset to him; &thus desperately wants to keep them#//'sidetracking a bit'; I said. Proceed to write a wHOLE FUCKEN NEW HC IN TAGS; I did; kjfbgkftg. Whoops lmao
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Song of the Day: March 26
"Songs About Rain" by Gary Allan
#song of the day#you might think that this is the opposite of 'Groovy Little Summer Song' but nope! closer to same because (drumroll)#they are one of the very best categories of thing: Country Songs About Country Songs#I love them. I adore them#'Songs About Rain' is one of the strongest and best examples of type I have (also 'Cheatin Songs' by Midland. impeccable)#'and it sure ain't easin my pain / all these songs like / Rainy Night in Georgia / Kentucky Rain#Here Comes That Rainy Day Feelin Again / Blues Eyes Cryin in the Early Mornin Rain#they go on and on and there's no two the same / oh it would be easy to blame / all these songs about rain'#what a gift. what a delight. legitimately hard to sing this song in a mournful voice because it makes me so damn happy#anyway as you might glean from how this is posting at 3 pm my time: my sleep schedule is /fucked/#I did have part of the bad conversation with my boss on Monday (immediately followed by garden times#which so overtook me that I spoke only about the garden and good spring feeling in my song post. what a blessing the garden is)#but mostly what happened is I said 'hey it is technically possible for me to make this but it will not help it will not do anything useful'#and my boss said 'but you can make it' and I said 'yes but we shouldn't. it will be a waste of time' and she said 'make it by Thursday'#and I said 'I absolutely cannot make it by Thursday. if I finish instead this better thing I've already been working on--'#and she said 'no we don't care about that thing. make part of the useless thing. by Thursday morning'#and I said 'if I bring you part of the useless thing and part of the good thing and I directly compare them in front of you--'#and she said 'we'll look at whatever you have Thursday morning but it's the useless thing we care about'#so the meeting is scheduled and I'm going to plead for the life of my better thing and probably the best I'll get is permission to do both#which is. I mean the useless thing is going to be a time-waster for sure but at least it won't be actively detrimental to anything?#it'll be fine I'll make it be fine. the inherent problems of when your boss doesn't actually know what you do for them I guess :/#(also maybe. maybe if it comes down to it. maybe I'll just make the good thing for myself and use it to make my own life better#and someday maybe they'll ask for a project that works and then I'll be able to dramatically unveil it but either way I'll benefit from it#hmm maybe yeah)
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