#either way i just wanted to share bc idk i guess i can do whatever i want idk

[akutasoda]

HELLO HELLO 🐊 ANON. IS BACK HERE WITH ANOTHER WEIRD AHH REQUEST OR IDEA WHATEVER :333, soo may i pls pls request bsd men with a fem reader who is literally Krul Tepes from Owari No Seraph :D? Like she is an all mighty vampire queen idk i just saw her wiki but i dont know how to describe her personality 😭😭 i saw the anime a long time ago and i dont remember anything smh😢😢😢 but anyways thats all, could it be crack and fluff? :P the characters would be Fukuzawa (can u tell im a bif fan of this ancient man:3) Bram, Dazai and Mori (ofc if you write for him)

So heres the idea, fem reader like i said is a vampire too like Bram, she is a member of DoA but she didnt joined to 'end wars' she joined to end with humanity, like her wiki said 🤓🤓 she sees humans as mere cattle. But her wiki didnt said anything about her personality 😭😭 so i guess shes bratty and laizy bc she looks like it lol i love her sm.

Anyways thats all i have to say, if u dont want to make the request is fine i have other few ideas too lol, take care of yourself and drink water, thats all ty for reading me <3 also i saw u have a lot to write from other requests, no matter how late you make this one, take your time, the least i want you to be is stressed, byeee 🐊🐊

vampire among livestock

synopsis - how are they with someone like krul tepes

includes - dazai, fukuzawa, mori, bram

warnings - fem!reader, fluff, slight crack, wc - 755

a/n: hello hello anon!!!! i haven't actually watched or read ONS in ages either but we do love fukuzawa here.. take care of yourself aswell <3

osamu dazai ★↷

↪rather amused by the fact that the doa was harbouring two vampires among their ranks. and in honesty, he figured that you were probably just as concerning as bram and you both needed to be kept an eye on.

↪extremely intrigued when he heard that one of them, you, held the title of a 'queen'. he didn't understand why but it was interesting nonetheless and was curious as to how one obtained such a title.

↪mainly you for the fact that you're goals simply didn't stop at 'ending wars', you had a much wider goal of 'ending humanity' as a whole - seeing them as only mere livestock. this reminded him of fyodor a tad but atleast he only went after ability users.

↪your natural pride and temperamental nature definitely gave you an advantage at reaching your goal. dazai also sought a great amount of amusement from hearing your confident talks even when in battle.

↪what was also rayher noticeable was how you took a more natural role of leader even when you really weren't meant to - whether or not the other members would assist your goals or not was still unclear.

yukichi fukuzawa ★↷

↪the doa was already a loooming threat as is, he didn't need to learn that they had gained another member who also possessed vampire traits. it certainly was a concerning factor for the ada.

↪your rather excitable and outgoing personality definitely reminded him of a certain great detective, your slight bratiness didn't get really help either. that same sense of pride was definitely prominent aswell.

↪it was certainly interesting that you didn't share the same goals as your colleagues, not like you had to but it was certainly intriguing. although your goal was certainly more alarming and serious than just 'ending wars'

↪to him, your views on humans were certainly interesting... to say the least. he'd never ever seen someone that viewed humanity in such a derogatory way yet be so insistent on their beliefs.

mori ougai ★↷

↪for the most part, he stayed out of the doa affairs personally - only really sensing his own people to get involved. but he couldn't help bit become intrigued when news of two vampire like people being involved.

↪especially when he learnt that one of them allegedly held a title of 'queen', of what he didn't exactly know but it surely wasn't an everyday title. the same one who also apparently never held back in putting people in their place.

↪your goals, per say, were also extremely intriguing. seeing humans as mere livestock that would do anything for personal gain. he could see where you were coming from.

↪the natural sense of leadership that you carried certainly was challenging to overcome, especially paired with the pride that you carried yourself with. ypu certainly could become an issue, especially when you're desire to achieve your goals clearly wouldn't be stopped so easy.

bram stoker ★↷

↪when he first heard of the new member and then found out they were a fellow vampire like him, he was both relieved and slightly intrigued.

↪relieved, as he felt like you could be the only tolerable member of the doa. he didn't exactly want to be there and the people he was forced to work with weren't exactly the best. so he figured someone like you would be his only hope at getting along with.

↪intrigued, as he'd never met another vampire before - sure there were the one's under the influence of his ability but they were practically brain dead. you would be thw first vampire he met that he could actually talk to, even more intrigued by your title of 'queen'.

↪surprisingly enjoyed listening to you ramble on about how humanity were mere livestock - it was either that, complete silence or listening to fukuchi. bram could see where you were coming from and he could definitely help you if he chose to.

↪im honesty, he thought you were a better leader than fukuchi. you always took on a more authoritive role and he preferred when you did so, even more when you'd shut down fukuchi.

↪your temperamental nature could be a bit much for him sometimes but he adjusted to it when you started talking to him more often.

taglist - @little-miss-chaoss, @vi-chan07

[ddejavvu]

This came to me in a dream but reader doing an acupressure move on Aaron’s hand whenever he’s too frowny and tense that makes him see stars and basically drift up to nirvana and all the tightness in his body release and the first time they do it he’d be so confused like why do you want my hand??? but okay here take I- ��🤨😐😦😧🤤😵‍💫

Bonus points bc the team would be like YOU CAN TURN OFF HIS OSCAR-THE-GROUCH MODE??? NEVER LEAVE THIS TEAM.

Just wanted to share idk what part of my uncultured brain spawned acupressure theory this evening but I’ll take it 🤠<3

Aaron's grumpy again. Most of the time he is, at least within the confines of his work hours. It's hard to smile when you're looking for abducted teenagers, but if he frowns any harder, he'll get stuck that way.

"There has to be something we're missing," He presses, narrowed eyes surveying the crime scene photos, "This level of violence is extreme, there's no need for this much overkill."

"Maybe he's fascinated with the blood," Reid suggests, hands coming up to aid in his explanation, "Y'know, some serial killers only kill for blood. There's various reasons for it, maybe they collect it, maybe they drink it, maybe they have some event in their past that makes it significant to them, but whatever it is, the killing isn't what they need, the blood is."

"Well these are teenage girls," Derek sighs, "Maybe the unsub lost a girlfriend or a sister in a pretty bloody way? Like a shooting, or a car accident or something?"

The table falls silent, each profiler extrapolating possibilities. You're halfway to reaching a possible conclusion, a suggestion about hunting on your tongue, but you see Aaron's fingers brush together, and it distracts you. He does it when he's anxious, and you're noticing it more and more lately.

You reach for his hand instead of speaking. You'll help later, when Aaron isn't suffering like this. Your fingers brush against his skin as you take his palm into your grip, and he looks at you from the side of his eye disapprovingly.

"Y/N," He murmurs, but no attempt at keeping his voice silent masks it from the other silent members of the team, "Now isn't the time for personal-" You squeeze at a tender spot on his hand methodically, "Relations..."

His face relaxes, wrinkles and ridges ebbing away as his eyes flutter shut involuntarily. You grin as wide as possible while sitting in front of bloody crime scene photos, happy you're able to provide even momentary relief.

"What was that?" Aaron looks at you, half suspicious and half dazed.

"Acupressure," You announce proudly, "It helps, doesn't it?"

"Yes," Aaron nods, running his fingers over the patch of skin that you'd pressed on, "It does."

"Where'd you learn that?" Rossi leans across the table.

"I was getting migraines from stress," You admit, "It helps to calm me down."

"Well, you're more of a magician than Spencer, Y/L/N," Derek grins, "You just melted that frown right off his face."

"Actually, acupressure isn't magic." Spencer starts, and he pointedly ignores the sighs that echo around the room, "It's a pseudoscience that originates from Chinese alternative medicine, and it works by targeting pressure points in your body that are supposedly linked to your 'life energy'. There've been several studies surrounding it which produced varying positive results, the most remarkable of which have documented illnesses actually being cured." He blinks once, twice after finishing, lips curving up into a half-smile that pudges his cheeks where they end.

"Well, uh, card tricks aren't magic either," Prentiss is the first to speak, "So I guess none of us are wizard-ready."

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

am i the asshole for leading a guy on an low-key manipulating his feelings? (🐺 so i can find it later)

trigger warnings for mental health issues, family death, and suicide mentions.

title is kiiinda dramatic, i know. and i should be clear that i know that what i did was definitely wrong to a degree, but idk how messed up it was.

for context: i (19 f) was freshly seventeen and had just returned to in person school for my senior year after doing my junior year online at home. the majority of my best and only friend had forgotten me almost entirely and abandoned me despite our texting throughout my online year. new social circles had formed in my absence and i had a very difficult time readjusting, especially because i had come out of isolation with worsened anxiety, depression, and lowkey suicidal idealization. to top it all off, my grandfather who i adored had just died. i was desperately lonely and at the lowest i had ever been mentally in my entire life. i say this all not to excuse my actions but to provide some context as to why i acted the way i did.

so i meet this guy (i think like 15-16?) who we'll call finn. finn is a year below me but we share an elective class. we were initially drawn to each other bc we were both the only alt/geeky kids in the room and hit it off really well. and at first things are going pretty good; we eat lunch together every day, share music, talk about our interests etc. normal friend stuff.

but here's the part where i'm probably ta: finn had told me earlier on that he's the type to catch feelings super easy, so i guess i should've expected it, but he tells me that he has a crush on me. not directly though--he starts talking about this girl that he has feelings for but doesn't have the courage to confess to. and the first time he brought it up i didn't realize it was me and ofc tried to hype him up so he could confess and all that. but by the second conversation we have about it, it dawns on me that he's definitely talking about me. and i'm like "ah fuck," because the last person i wanted it to be was me--i'm mostly into girls, and also saw finn as a little brother more than anything else. but i keep hyping him up anyways saying stuff like "oh c'mon the worst she can do is say no! and even then you can at least move on with closure!"

so he takes my advice and confesses to me over text. i turn him down as politely as i can. which is where this whole thing should've ended tbh. but it didn't. his confession (even though it was over text) really endeared me and made me feel appreciated and beautiful in a way i never had been before. i'm not conventionally attractive + a plus size girl, and had never had anyone confess to me before, let alone say something as sincere and sweet as finn did to me. i was always the girl guys dared each other to ask out as a joke, yknow? it felt nice to know that someone saw me as desirable. again, this doesn't excuse my actions or justify them. just context.

so i decide that even though i know i'm not going to pursue anything with finn, i don't want him to lose interest in me either. so i start acting like i might be into him. tell him certain outfits make him look cute, go on and on about how much i love his hair (he really did have nice hair tbh), lean in a little closer when we talked, and constantly reassure him that he'd get a gf soon because good-looking, sweet and funny guys like him don't stay single for long.

he definitely notices bc he (again over text) asks if it's ok to be more physical when we interact. like can he hold my hand if we walk down the hall or whatever. this is definitely where i should've stopped, but i didn't. i kept up the pseudo-flirting bullshit.

and then he confesses (you guessed it! over text) for a second time, insisting that he really thinks that i like him back now. i tell him i don't know what he's talking about but that i'm happy to keep being friends with him. again, i don't stop the flirting-that's-not-quite-flirting.

this continues all the way until the end of the year. he tells me before i graduate that he really cares for me and doesn't want to lose touch after i leave. i promise him we won't. at this point i'd realized the gravity of my actions and had come to regret the way i treated finn, and decided the best course of action was to let our friendship fizzle out after i graduate. so i stop responding as frequently to him, he eventually stops reaching out until finally we lost contact and i delete his number.

i know that what happened was kinda fucked up, but how bad of a fuck up was this tumblr?

(secondary question: is this something that would've had a lasting impact on him and his view of relationships? i hope it isn't. i hope he forgot about me quickly. i hope he's doing better and has found someone who actually likes him.)

What are these acronyms?

[sansaorgana]

Listen, I can't write this but I have to share so I guess I'll invade you ask with this 🫣 bc DRAMA! 🫣

I mentioned that I was playing with the idea of accidental pregnancy with half human Reader right?

So what if it happened when he was Halbrand, essentially a human in a physical aspect? 🤔 double the chance for anything unexpected right? Right, let's go with that...

I still think the first reaction of Sauron would be accusation and jealousy, thinking it impossible that the child could be his...

After a rather explosive response he would start to consider the possibility...

Then he would start to think how the hell is this happening bc it not supposed to work like that for him bc he is a spirit and it would require conscious effort from him to create life from his own essence of energy or whatever...

Then he would realise bc this didn't happen the child and even you could die if he doesn't do this properly in that spiritual level...

But he deceived you and you are so done with him and you don't believe him... What is he supposed to do???

hi! I'm exhausted today and I'm not sure if I understood everything correctly so feel free to correct me 😀 the reply got a bit long so I used small text (sorry for any typos or grammar mistakes but I am too tired to read it again and my work basically is about editing text so I don't want to do it at home, too xd -- unless it's fics ofc)

I don't know the lore as much as you do and I didn't bother to google it much (I planned to right before writing the fic I planned) and in my head Annatar as The Lord of Gifts is completely in control when he makes Reader pregnant, perhaps it would be some divine interference without any intercourse even lol idk if it's possible but it's kinda creepy and it suits him imo to just "put" the child in her as a gift because she wants it and he needs her wrapped around his little finger. I personally don't plan for him to have his child as an accident in this story

However, Halbrand... Hm... He might be in a human form but he still is a Maia so I don't think human rules apply to him (I might be wrong). Either way, I was thinking some time ago for a Reader being from Númenor and meeting Sauron as Halbrand there. Imagine her fling leaving her pregnant and not only that -- he's also Sauron 💀

And honestly as much as I think he wouldn't want to have a child willingly (and even in the fic I planned he would do it hesitantly), after finding out his partner is pregnant, I think he would not want to abandon the child because it can only make the kid later want to overthrow him even more out of anger. Also, he would probably be interested watching the progress of his kid and seeing how many abilities they inherited and how powerful they are. He would most likely try to raise them to follow his orders. Not as a successor but as a most trusted commander of his armies etc. And despite his nature I think he would be capable of some love so he'd also be overprotective at least when the kid is still a child. I think especially towards a girl ? But maybe I am applying human world rules to Middle-earth... idk if sexism works the same way there 😂

[gonsobomb]

I don’t understand a lot of peoples’ grievances with Jack Perry. I think he’s perfectly serviceable, definitely not this over-pushed nepo-baby who doesn’t deserve to be where he’s at. My guess would be it’s hold out anger from brawl out which isn’t helped by the scapegoat character just being a constant reminder of it. This isn’t me saying I hate the scapegoat either I actually really dig it but saddling him with a gimmick whose only purpose is to remind us of what happened further damages his relationship to the fans. Same with having him join the elite. I think Darby made reference to it even before their recent feud that jack got the job bc he was friends with the bucks, being socal natives and all. But we never saw that materially on screen until they brought him back in and that just leads back again to the punk stuff. Would Perry be in the elite rn if not for brawl out? I don’t think so. But I wanna share some ideas I have as to where I’d have taken the scapegoat.

So I’m not rewriting history here so much as changing the handling of events. Brawl out still happens and Perry is still sidelined. He rocks up in New Japan as the scapegoat and rips up the contract. Hell you’d still have the bucks bring him back in as a wink and nudge bc that’s what they do they like to push buttons. But I wouldn’t have him join the elite. The current elite aesthetic with the bucks and okada wearing suits clashes way too hard with the scapegoat aesthetic which is honestly my biggest problem with all of it lmao. Have the bucks bring him in and say “hey pal you owe us one.” You can still do anarchy in the arena and blood and guts that way. He’s friendly but not a member.

So this is where we go a different way. Go full Raven. I think he comes in talking about sacrifice like he does now. But that’s all he does is talk about it; make him show it. Have him go up to the jobber regulars and talk about how he was down and out once too. Give them a pat on the back and tell them that before everything big you have to sacrifice something. Nonsense stuff but that’s okay bc it works and gets them on his side. Just scrolling through the roster you could give him Aaron Solo, Kip Sabian, and fuck it idk Griff Garrison. Guys who haven’t amounted to much and they help him win the tnt title. Hell I think Perry and Anna Jay are still dating throw her in there too like Raven had Beulah. Call them The Herd or something lmao. And just have him be a prick. He can make his little movies it’d be great. And eventually one of them, probably Kip, can get tired of the abuse and turn on him and win the belt eventually and boom you got another guy outta it instead of whatever the fucking daddy issues thing he’s doing with Christian is. Plus the box head thing kinda fits in with the scapegoat if you wanted it I think you could make it work. And how good would it be to have this wealthy nepo baby pretending to be this grungy cult leader guy idk I’d love it I think there would be lots to play with there

[voidimp]

Desire, guilt and hunt for oli?

desire: What's one thing your OC wants more than anything in the world? Are they open with that desire? Why or why not? What would they do to fulfill it?

this is always such a tough question for me to answer bc the concept of Having An End Goal is such a foreign concept to me. ppl are really out here trying to do specific things?? knowing what they want out of life? i could never. & honestly like... obviously i cant give that to every character bc it would get boring real fast but i think i can give it to oli. i dont think they really have something in mind!! im not sure they would be able to answer the question themself, in terms of either material or immaterial goals. like especially being. however old they are (at least a century at this point idk specifically) theyve done a lot of things, theyve had a lot of experiences, theyve definitely collected lots of stuff. i think they tend to just go after something until they either get it or get bored of trying.

to kind of answer the second part, it would depend on the specifics; they might be open about it, if they think that would help them obtain it, & they probably wouldnt ask for help but might try to convince people to help in a less direct way. they dont like to ever seem like they need assistance from other people... even when they do.

i guess for a more serious answer their main goal is just be the freedom to do whatever they want forever lmao

guilt: What is your OC guilty about? How do they handle their guilt? Do they try to avoid guilt, or do they accept it?

REPRESS THAT SHIT!!! NEVER FEEL BAD ABOUT YOUR PAST ACTIONS except when they compound & u suddenly break down & have a panic attack about it BUT THATS PRIVATE!!!!!

theyre very stubborn, so they try to convince themself that their actions were justified, that they just did what they had to, but theyre... not always right. theyll overreact & then act like they had no other choice but still feel bad about it & pretend they dont. it kind of just ends with a lot of conflicting feelings all around.

as for what theyre guilty about, um. well the killing people is definitely the big one. it hasnt actually happened often, despite the whole being a vampire thing (generally speaking the amount of blood theyd be taking wouldnt actually be enough to kill someone), but theres a few instances they havent quite gotten over yet. they still have some lingering guilt about their brothers death back when they were kids, even though it wasnt their fault. theres not much else coming to mind thats really notable, theyve definitely got some bad habits that theyre not super proud of but no particular instances that were more significant than the rest.

one thing theyre not guilty about (usually) is whatever happens as a result of them sharing the bits of information theyve picked up about people. if they dont want their secrets getting out, they should be a little better at keeping them secret.

hunt: Who or what is your OC hunted by? A person, a feeling, a past mistake? Is your OC able to let their guard down, or are they constantly alert?

ok so. this one has been tripping me up for fucking ever. i do not know how to answer it. if it was haunt i think i could answer it more easily (oli has been around for a while, theyve done a lot of things & known a lot of people & made more than their fair share of mistakes) but hunt? i dont know that theres really anything or anyone in particular theyre hunted by. i feel like it would be a more situational thing? like if theyve pissed someone off recently, or if someone has caught onto the vampire thing... so i guess like. not really anything specific, just the looming threat that someone could have their eye on them?

[mithliya]

https://www.tumblr.com/youturningintodust/735765266414387200/yes-this-is-rape-culture-done-by-women-well?source=share

invert in op's bio

honestly the invert stuff is whatever to me bc i guess she’s a gnc lesbian so it’s like.. that was what they were called back then. if she feels it’s more succinct and fitting than terms nowadays, that’s fine, her choice. as a term it’s tied to homophobic ideology but i cant assume that’s her point in using it.

i personally don’t like the strap fixation online or in lesbian spaces, because it has made me & many other lesbians feel like weirdos tbh like. we feel like there’s sth wrong with us for NOT liking that but i guess she’s speaking from a diff perspective here, so that’s fine too.

i disagree with framing it as “butch/femme sex” & i dislike the assumption that there being a masc & a feminine woman within the same relationship means we’re having sex a certain way. it’s rly not like that and it sucks when ppl assume that butches can’t possibly enjoy reciprocal sex and only want to give instead of receive any sex acts. or, perhaps less damaging imo, that feminine women only want to receive and not give. it’s just… not the case. how we present to the world doesn’t say much about how we have sex.

the idea that not liking the fixation with strap that can be found in many spaces for women into women is tied to the idea that u need to “use your vagina (penetratively)” is also odd to me. there’s definitely lesbians who don’t enjoy receiving any penetration but enjoy receiving oral for example, or clit stimulation, or some form of rubbing like tribbing or scissoring or w/e else. idk why theres this assumption that it’s either u wear the strap or u get penetrated?? like. it’s not that rare for lesbians to not enjoy or want penetration, actually. maybe its rare to never want any form of penetration, but that’s also not that rare nor is it limited to butches??

but yeah if someone expresses only wanting sex in one way, to guilt trip them in any way or shame them in any way for not wanting to have sex the way YOU approve of is rapey and gross. she’s right about that.

idk why she’s acting like topping being “alien” to lesbians is normal tho…most of us enjoy reciprocal sex, meaning we are mostly vers. if a woman acted like topping is a totally weird thing to do, i reckon most women would not be compatible with her.

again rly hate the equating of female masculinity with being a stone top! she means stone butches, she should say that. it’s more common among butches, but it’s neither exclusive to butches to only want to have the type of sex she describes nor do all butches fit that standard either.

i’m sure what she describes exists but honestly the phenomena i’ve noticed more often is the opposite where people expect butches to not want to be penetrated or not want to have sex acts done onto them… i agree w her ppl who feel entitled to do that to butches are awful tho.

[jung-koook]

lol i hope seven is a s*x song idc how crazy ill get



also im late but just to add in, about the whole promo thing - i dont think its about "its gonna be MORE promo for him"

i guess its just about them (individually speaking), we know they all have a whole team but at the end its about them, what they like, what they can do, schedules we dont know about, like ..we can see its not all about music anymore (not a bad thing, i mean like they have contracts with fashion and stuff) so they have other things going on too

i know hybe can be shitty, i bet, but we cant blame them for EVERYTHING

the boys make different music between them, (just look at rapline, its SO DIFFERENT) its not the same, jimins promo was different because it had a different vibe if you may, jk's style we've seen its so street edgy idk you've seen the guy lol, and i bet taehyungs promo wont be anything like jk's either, theyre so different in style! thats it, i just think the style is different, it represents them in their own way, it cant be the same all the time, specially not after doing their solo projects, this is their chance to do whatever they want!

its jk first solo, no, it doesnt have to be about bangtan bc of a 7, maybe a reference SURE because we know how they cant live without each other, but lets give him credit, hes about to share with us something hes been working on God knows how long, these boys have experienced so much together but its time and he said so himself, its a new challenge for him, lets just support

i love this because we love them all but we get to see now a new piece of their souls as solo, its exciting!

go jk! go my boyss!!

yes, you're right. thats what I wanted to say there. but what i said did it imply that jeongguk was having more promo? if so i want to apologize because that was not what i wanted to say at all. what I wanted to say there is that we already saw that the promos will be different for each member. that from what we've seen so far, we're going to see different things for each member. I think I even mentioned that I really didn't like some things but that its "okay". like for example jimin wanted to have more mvs but that didn't happen. and I really wish that had happened. the little time difference there was between namjoon, jimin and yoongis albums. and i think the same thing looks like it will happen when tae releases his album. i really think there's a big chance that as soon as sevens promo is over bighit will announce taes album. that's all I wanted to say there. I'm so sorry if I implied something completely different from what I really meant to say.

I'm really so excited for this new challenge for him and to learn more of the details he wants to share with us about seven. this recording film made me even more excited for seven and I thought that wasn't even possible 😆😭

[willow-lark]

ok so i’ve never tried this myself but i’ve heard it does help. and it is the silliest thing but i guess that’s the point. whatever you wanna start writing even if it’s in the middle of an ongoing story, go to a new paragraph and start with “once upon a time there was…” and then just be dumb and write whatever you want. it’s supposed to feel silly and dumb and without any expectations, but then you engage and you can slowly build to something more because words are just being typed as they come even if they are messy or silly or awfully put together. it doesn’t matter!!

i’ve found that more times than not my blocks happen bc i put too much weight on my shoulders and too many expectations on my words, because someone will read them and they need to be perfect. which, yeah, they can be perfect later. but as i’m typing only i will read them so there’s no issue if they are silly bc i’m writing for myself. writing for the rest will come later with editing and polishing. idk if that happens to you but either way, lmk if you try it and if it works!!

heya nic!!! ohhh i've never tried this technique, but honestly it sounds like a great idea! i could do with doing more writing sprints, i also feel like i spend ages and ages agonizing over everything i want to say. sometimes you really just should let the words spill out of you! thank you so much for sharing this tip with me, i do think i'm gonna try it!! best of luck with your writing endeavors too and thankyou so so much for your kind message!! ahhhhh 🫂💖

[golbrocklovely]

how are they always looking for an editor? and its always for sams half of work?? maybe dont write a novel on how people should do your work and then someone might actually want to work with you🤷🏼‍♀️ just a thought.

well last year it was just them editing. i think they had one person help them for some videos (or maybe just a handfull idk) but they never found someone permenant.

my guess is that sam micromanaged too hard and either the person quit or sam was like "you're not doing it the way i want you to, so goodbye."

and giving directions or notes on what you want the thing to look like… i get it. i'm a perfectionist too. but if you have to give literally 20 pages of directions, that means either you think the person is an idiot, you hired someone that isn't qualified at all, or YOU MICROMANAGE TOO MUCH.

snc (sam mostly, let's be honest here) have made it abundently clear that they want to have creative control over how the videos look, and that's fine. but if that is the case, and somehow you can't teach someone to replicate what you do, then you yourself HAVE to do it, especially if you're not gonna compromise at all.

which is why, again, i think they should take colby's part and train someone to do that instead of the creative aspect, that way they still have control over it and can do what they want without having to train someone in excessive detail.

i mean this with no disrespect towards sam but two things i have noticed about all of this: a), he truly thinks he does the most difficult part of the editing and b) he's really leaving colby in the dust with all of this nonsense. i mean, he makes it seem as if he's doing so. much. work. when in reality he is given a somewhat finished product by colby, who actually has to sit thru HOURS of footage and piece together a storyline that makes sense. and all sam does is add on stock footage, music, sound effects, and some basic text - which god knows are all in a folder that he's been reusing for years now - and making it seem as if he's going above and beyond that to finish the video. my issue with that is both of their parts are crucial, i will not argue about that (even if i downplayed what sam does as a joke). but sam has alluded that sometimes he goes back thru the footage colby edited down and adds more stuff in. so it's no fucking wonder he feels like he does more when he can barely trust colby to make a storyline and edit down 6-8 hours of footage.

and not only is colby doing that, he's pulling out parts and making videos of that extra content and putting it on xplrclub. sam doesn't touch the footage nine times out of ten after it was filmed. tbh, i think they both do about the same amount of editing, it's just one of them likes to act like they do more.

and sam is leaving colby in the dust with all of this bs. first off, he's gonna be burning a lot of bridges if he keeps searching for an editor that can replicate his style but is also someone he has to micromanage the whole time, or has to give 600 notes too bc god forbid it isn't up to his standard. like, i get you want the product to look good in the end, but clearly you either have too high of standards and are expecting too much or you're just a shit teacher and don't know how to train someone and thus are ending up with an editor you don't trust and product you don't like - which are all YOU problems. and the part that doesn't make sense at all to me is…. why is colby the only one, in the end, doing the editing? is he supposed to find an editor on his own? or is he expected to do his part of the video so sam can go off with his gf and do whatever? bc highkey it feels like the only reason colby is stuck editing and doing his own share is bc he doesn't have a gf that he has to look after bc she gets scared of her own shadow or can't be alone in their gated community mansion.

let me just rewind a bit bc i think i got slightly off topic lol

personally, i get sam on some aspects. i get wanting something to look exactly the way you want it too. i get being a perfectionist, having an idea of what you want something to look like, and not taking other ppl's advice or critiques when they give it. however, you also have to know when to just accep things as they are. and if you can't, then do them yourself. but don't get upset when you end up doing everything on your own.

if you want an editor, train someone to be your editor. don't hire an already experienced editor just to be pissed when they do things differently than you. and if you really have to give 100s of notes or 20 pages of directions………. you gotta tone it down a bit. you're not making movies, you're making youtube videos for christ's sake lol

[havethetouch]

FYI older art uploads in ze future

Idk how much far I go back with my uploads but like I prolly go for a bit maybe even early 2000s so lots of art uploads from way back lie ahead xd I still love most of them dearly and I think it's important to keep old art around in galleries or somewhere people can still get to it because those are where I come from, those are where my style developed from bit by bit those are where many of my OCs came from too and idk I wanna share that with people. I want you to see from where I started roughly (roughly because the really old stuff is harder for me to find I started uploading stuff to the internet when i was like.. uh 14/15, I would need to find, re-scann and also erase my deadname from a lot of stuff, bc back then I did not have a nifty signature that nobody can possible read) when I began uploading my stuff to the internet and how things just slowly but surley geared mostly towards ladies and hair and wings and details and my love for thicc lineart. Funny side note on the line art though? My very first OC artworks were made with a fountain pen from school with black ink in it and a broad tip, so my lines were naturally broad due to the nature of my pen. (which I also used for writing, in school, bc I was still in school back then and it feels like forever ago while I am writing this fuck XD) Sometime soon though I found thin liners that did not smudge with copics like my ink did so I entered the dubious zone of touch does thin lines forever, then goes back to his roots and makes it thicc. Anyway... what I'm trying to say is, I think it's nice to see an artists journey, and I love it to pieces when I can catch glimpses of peoples old art and see were they came from/started out from. So yeah imma slowly go through my stuff and bring old stuff back online. I used to have a gallery (on DA) that went all the way back almost to the beginnings but I changed accounts in 2011/12 to my new artist handle (back then in ye olden days name changes were not yet a thing on DA) and while the younger account still exists I have everything thrown into storage because fuck DA. I keep my "archive" there until they get funny ideas like deleting accounts of inactive users or whatever. But it's no longer public and like I said only goes back to 2011/12 anyway so yah. Like i said i do not know how much of the really old stuff is gonna come back online but I'd like to bring some of it back. Guess Imma go tag my art posts with the years they were made in too for filtering purposes xd But just fyi I also have a FurAffinity account were I am basically also try to do something similar and have a whole folder structure dedicated to years of creation for the very same purpose. Just in case that's more convenient for some of you but I am in no way caught up with uploads there either. Nb4 it comes up: I am currently too lazy for a personal website were I could go chronological madness. Mainly bc I know myself I would fucking take forever to just design a layout and get super anal about everything else and loose patience long before uploading anything so I am doing the responsible thing and not do that. At least not anytime soon. I have my projects planned out for 2023 already with some pockets for arttrades 'n stuff I am booked out XD

[trashmuis]

Current state of things, I guess... tw personal stuff but wanting to share

So... I've been home for about 3 weeks

and my fuckin mental health is sufferinngggggg bro like im straight up not having a good time right now ✌

It's extremely difficult to be away from my -still crazy to say this but- husband, and the home we had together. Getting a residence contract in his country is still taking a lot of time and we're not even at the home stretch yet because it might be another 3 months after the last bit gets submitted. Like fr this has been stressful and that plays so much into how both of us are feeling.

I don't really want or like to use this platform as a diary anymore, but I feel like... alone sometimes with these feelings I guess. Especially with a 6 hour time difference, I'm by myself a lot. So i'm venting. I don't want to bother anyone separately for it, I mean, besides like a therapist probably. But idk if i can afford a therapist really anyway. I totally need one though. On the to-do list going forward, even if the search previously has been uhhhh pretty unhelpful 👎

But, um, my confidence is super low rn and being away suuuper doesnt help bc he cant be there for me physically to provide that comfort i need when im being like, absolutely down, and i am so damn hard on myself when left by myself. I need to use coping methods and i'm lacking motivation to even do that.

Genuinely, that's what i really really want to work on now. So that's also why I'm writing this, to the void (which isnt a void, but, no one follows me so whatever.) I feel so fuuuucking boring sometimes. What are my hobbies rn? What is my sense of style? Am I stifling myself??? Yeah. I am. My confidence is at the bottom of a barrel and I am frustrated about that, but my anxiety is way way up, and my depression is making everything feel like a goddamn chore.

I'm so sick of it. I really want to pick myself up and like, work on being a better me. Cuz this year isnt starting as well as I thought it was, bc going home like deflated me so much and it blows, dude. I have some regrets from last year too, and that doesnt help, but i cant do shit until i go back overseas anyway. I just feel like i have nothing going for me at the moment and like im wasting my life 😕

Idk im a fuckin dork but i have fun with stupid stuff and it makes me happy, and i just feel like i NEED something to make me happy rn, bc usually that's my husband and i just... dont have him the way id like rn since we're so many miles apart for at least the next 90 days, if not longer. I'd REALLY REALLY REALLY like to not need to do this one more time. But tbh btw, i need to be a better me for all days, so i can manage on my own anyway. i dont want to be codependent or NEED him when i feel awful either.

TLDR; Mental health issues are brutal. Def feeling that rn. But I'll be working on it.

[dynayshe]

my tumblr essay on art style i guess :P (read if you're a bored artist lol)

now that I'm out of art block i can draw whatever i want however i want right? (limited by my skill set obviously)

but how tf do i know what i want????

im looking at my inspirations and goals and

i want to depict mha characters as well as hori so maybe i should imitate his profiles

i also like his coloring style

i love how detailed genshin's general art style is

but it requires LOTS of effort so it's really not realistic for me

i have a few artists on twt that i like but. their style is really unique and while that's nice i don't quite see myself drawing in their style (too cartoony for me maybe)

lots of artists on insta but. they'd be good for more fashion centered art. the ones im thinking of wouldn't work w expressing emotions

the artists w a mix of mha and realism. big eyes but sculpted faces. unique noses and lips but they dissappear when u do strong expressions.

OH like a second style?? for comics and funnier emotions??? like chibi but not exactly. more western art style in general but. more anime like one for emotions. ahh a lot of people do that i guess. could be smart

and then there is the process of sketching.

confident vs ashamed lines. more imagination less lines. I've seen habs draw live and it's crazy how they take it slow but jump straight to lining. no need for putting a circle for the head, nothing just going straight for the line.

reminded me of how people paint differently w different mediums. bigger sections w acrylics and going layer by layer. while smaller sections w oils and finishing an area before moving to the next one. this doesn't quite work the same w digital but i guess you need to consider how you THINK while drawing too

maybe it would help w my proportions? or maybe i need to master my proportions to be able to sketch that confidently?? idk how this relation works tbh

and of course another thing to consider about my style is my tools and steps

im mostly using csp but sometimes i doodle on autodesk maybe i should stop doing that. and on csp i think i found my fav brush (that i use for literally everything) but just like how i could have different styles for emotions maybe a different brush would help me w different ideas too (like yesterday i was drawing overlay deku and thought my current brush was too soft for it. so i tried another brush that looks a bit like softer g-pen) yknow brush theory and all

AND THEN process oh my god all the layers and steps. like that's one thing i just don't understand. there are so many different methods for it and im trying to go for the easiest one but sometimes i feel like i did a wrong step and like im stuck. yknow like maybe i should have put this on top of that oe maybe I need to learn how to render ON TOP OF lineart. i know i can't have everything but seeing all these artists both amaze me and confuse me even further bc i get so envious!! it looks so good when they do it and i don't know how long it took them to get here either they just make it feel so easy

SIGHHH and after all of that there is still one more thing: personality and originality

i want it to feel like me. like it reminds people of me. my current style changes so much that one of them doesn't even feel like the other yknow? i want it to be recognizable im just a tiny artist barely starting to share w others but i have a few friends and i want to seem like myself through my art to them (yknow like how you can recognize your friend from the way they dress and the clothes you've seen them wear before)

and of course. i don't want it to feel like im doing homework. this is art i still wanna enjoy it. im trying to prove to my parents that i can do this as a job (obviously even if it's art degree they stilk want me to graduate from an university) so i decided to study industrial design. while studying im gonna draw and hopefully take smth like commisions once i grow larger (once i figure out a payment method! this dumbass gov doesn't allow PayPal nor any fucking alternatives!! it's impossible to be an international artist in here ToT) as i was saying. i want to enjoy my future job and my current hobby i guess. I've tried many mediums but i think i work easiest w digital. i make a lot of mistakes and adjustments so only digital works well enough for me anyway

that's all i guess. of course I've had these thoughts many times in my life but i always had the excuse of art block or other stuff like skill or time but. now that i got to be completely free from school and got my interest back in mha (also will to live lmao), and I've finally conquered my art block i guess i just want a purpose in life and that is improving my art (AND MY FUCKING LOVE LIFE UGHHH well also,, i want friends,,, irl ones that i can be honest with,, feel like myself,,, wait fuck this is getting too real imma end it here)

[seekforwarmth]

hiii, lou! 💜

honestly, i love giving comforting hugs, because most of the time i don't know how to react when someone is having a bad time. i'm really empathetic, but at the same time i easily find solutions for other people's problems. when what they need at the time is just to mourn and calm down. 😓

yes, when the time comes, i would love to see what blogs you have in mind. 👾

oh, i love angst at all. it's just sometimes the pain is too much. but if i'm being honest, i easily lose interest if everything is just fluff or the couple gets together too fast. 🫣

let me guess, you only like louis, harry and one dee? i can't wait to see what songs you have chosen! and i have been always thinking the songs we listen to show what kind of person we are. it's like you get the memo before even talking to someone. that's why i don't usually show people my playlists. 🦄

well, about the astrology, not only one sign makes you who you are, but a lot of different signs working with each other. also, i kinda get this. i usually prefer listening when i don't want to talk about myself. but at the same time i'm like harry when someone asks me questions i don't want to answer. talking about anything else, but not the topic we are currently discussing. 😄

i hope whatever is the reason about you not being allowed to drink coffee is not something serious and you feel better soon! and i love hot chocolate so much. i don't like coffee. i prefer tea, matcha or hot chocolate. 🪁

i think in our next spanish lesson you should teach me how to say "i love chocolate", because i can't live without it. 😋

my questions for the day: how many fics are you planing to post this year? and what keeps you motivated to write? ☔️

hope you have a lovely friday,

- your secret valentine ☺️

hi love!!

i never know how to react either, i just offer if they want to be listened and that’s it. i’ve only comforted my family when we’ve lost someone but that’s as far as i’ve gotten.

(i don’t have any blogs in mind but i’ll look for some.)

ohh i like both i think. i like it when they go through a lot of things to be together but also when it’s just them loving each other since the beginning. i guess it depends on how things are said for me hdkdhd

yes, i only like them 🤭 and before i forget about it, here are ten songs to know me better:

the view from the afternoon - arctic monkeys

music when the lights go out - the libertines

ocean’s deep - born ruffians

hometown - twenty one pilots

beautiful disaster - 311

wait for it - leslie odom jr (hamilton cast)

fireproof - one direction

headline - louis tomlinson

satellite - harry styles

everywhere - niall horan

i think that’s why i prefer listening, so i don’t have to talk abt myself, and bc sometimes i stumble with my words (idk if that’s the right expression lol).

it’s nothing serious, don’t worry! it’s something to do with my brain, i was a bit ill last summer and now it’s just a measure to not get back to that heheh we can share a mug of hot chocolate sometime!

okay, if you want to say “i love chocolate” you can use the pronoun for “i” which is “yo” or you can skip it since the verb already indicates you’re talking in first person. “yo amo el chocolate” or “amo el chocolate”. yo is pronounced like in english, amo = ah-moh, for el it’s like when you say elephant, and chocolate you already know ;)

i’m posting two fics this year. my friends keep me motivated but not in a pressured way but i want to write to make my friends happy, that’s the reason i started writing fics in the first place. since i can’t give my friends gifts for their birthdays (or just because), i decided to write fics for them. currently i’m working with a friend on something and i’m having so much fun but i’m mainly doing it to see her happy. 💗

you know, i originally wanted to ask you your top 5 louis songs and then i linked it to the movies so i mentioned soundtrack lol but i’m still curious if you want to share?

have a nice day!!

[introspectionofaqueer]

it feels so strange to have a *casual* crush on someone

Like not strangley obsessive or weird? Like I just enjoy talking to her and getting to know her? Part of me isn't really sure if I'm just not able to tell romantic vs platonic attraction. Like what if since it just feels good and normal I'm just mistaking platonic for romance? Just bc she's pretty? But another part of me feels like maybe this is how it's supposed to be. Not all consuming for once. Like isn't it a good sign when your nervous system feels relaxed around someone? Instead of like butterflies and nerves? Or does that just mean you don't like them in that way? I'm confused because I feel kind of like, there's no reason for me not to like her that way. But idk if there's like "the spark" or whatever. I'm so not sure how this is supposed to feel. Mistake 1 is believing in a "supposed to" when it comes to this sort of thing, I guess. It doesn't really even matter, I'm just doing my thing regardless. I don't necessarily have the capacity for a romantic relationship right now anyway so either way it's going to be a long time of building friendship first anyway. No expectations and no pressure, I'm just excited to potentially have another good friend I can trust. It's hard really only having one true friend. I love her dearly and wouldn't trade her friendship for the world, but it would be nice to have a support system so the burden doesn't all fall on one. I think I'd be content with two mutually loving and compassionate friendships. I think I have really high standards for friendships which is why 2 is plenty. Like I just want emotional reciprocity and mutual love and understanding and care. Sometimes I feel like my standards for friendship are closer to partnership standards to most people, but I honestly think it's the bare minimum. Like I just want genuine care and affection. Love is everything, I want people who I can share it deeply and profoundly with. And if we cannot be vulnerable together, how are we to experience the depths to which love goes? I don't want surface level. I love loving and just want special people to share it with who want to love me all the same.

[transboysokka]

dont mind me barging in on your roomie drama :p but also i am an outsider with limited facts, so take everything i say with a grain of salt asgdjgh

my initial conclusion from all this is that it seems like your roommate is the type who really does not vibe with implicitly shared things, whereas you are absolutely that type. leaving your mug to be washed, as an example, could have been passive aggression, but it could have just as easily been "im not going to touch your stuff because it makes me uncomfy." and it seems like a similar thing with all the things she's offering back to you/wanting to throw away instead keep it for herself.

i recently did a moveout with a roomie where we had to gut the whole place for cleaning, and as such, we ended up pulling out all the food/items and putting em on a table while we cleaned. (it was a cross-country move, so a lot of what we had couldn't come with us either.) cuz it was convenient, we just said to roomie "hey, pick out whatever you want to keep, and we'll throw out the rest." by the end, i was super surprised by the amount of stuff they would rather us throw out/donate. things like pots/pans, half used spices and containers of rice or cooking isle, even unopened bottles of shampoo went into donation boxes. i really didn't get it personally, but that roomie was undeniably a sweetheart, so i just kinda had to face the idea that, even if it's more convenient in a lot of ways, inheriting items from a move out is just something some people aren't comfortable with. and from what i can tell, it's one of those assumptions that isnt really challenged by either side until a move out *does* happen.

as for the blow up mentioned at the end, if im right, it seems like she's assumed that you share her same system of not liking "hand-me-down" items, and as a result, she feels like you've left a bunch of chores for her to deal with. granted, i also think she doesn't seem good at communication, and she seems to make assumptions (see the "i didnt know you were still leaving" thing), so im not surprised that things happened the way they did. also i wouldn't say that your roomie *isnt* being a lil passive aggressive and purposefully unhelpful, but i wouldn't be surprised if the source of that was just a misunderstanding of personal preferences.

in terms of the rent stuff, talk about the rent stuff and dont drop the convo until you have a plan, but in terms of the more personal stuff:

my reasonable advice? sit down and talk about it all if you want to maintain a friendship, even though it might be uncomfortable and might not solve all the issues. hinesty is the best policy sort of thing. my *honest* advice? apologize and feel a lil salty in secret, grab all your stuff even if you left it for her benefit, and then simply drift apart uvu

......i didn't say it was good advice........

Wow! Thanks for the thoughtful response!!

Yeah I hadn’t considered it but she very much hasn’t ever been the most down for sharing in those ways. That’s fine I guess.

I did answer her yesterday like “I wasn’t trying to be like that, but I’ve never moved out of a place that was still being lived in before and so I left some stuff to try and help you out” and we were able to move past it

also I can tell it was hard for her to say goodbye to my dog who she’s always been involved with so there were probably a lot of emotions happening yesterday

The communication issues though… ugh

Yeah when things get settled here I’m gonna reopen that conversation about “so what ARE we doing about this rent situation?” bc she’s also left it as “idk maybe I’ll just move out early too” so okay what IS THE PLAN

I’d be fine to drift apart but our dogs have been together their entire lives so it’s one of those things like I should be careful not to burn that bridge too badly

Thanks for your input though! It definitely helped me put some things into perspective