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clubdionysus · 6 months ago

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[BAD DECISION #22] Listening to Jimin

warnings: new years eve is upon us and you know what that means!!!!! the arrival of the red witch!!! all three of jungkook girlies in one room!! lucky him!!!! the real question is which one is he kissing once the clock strikes 12?? heheheh

soundtrack: dont do that - leellamarz, toil

wc: 12.8k

bd total wc: 540k (ongoing)

AO3 | MASTERLIST | MINORS DNI

There are three fundamental rules to remember when dealing with a break-up, or so Jimin says.

The first is to always wear black.

"You never know what to expect," he says - though Jeongguk isn't sure about the validity of such a claim.

With every girl he's ever dated, he always anticipated the end, and always knew exactly how it would play out. He doesn't put this down to intuition, but rather to the fact he actually takes the time to get to know the girls he's dating.

Jimin, on the other hand, fails to consider such things. It's not that he doesn't get to know the girls he dates. He just doesn't really get how girls work.

"Black is your safest bet," he doubles down when he's met with a raised eyebrow from his housemate over a late breakfast a few days after Christmas.

Both home from visiting family, it had been Jimin who breached the subject of Jiyeong, knowing that Jeongguk tended to try and keep his problems tucked away, nice and neat.

"She cries? Mascara won't show. She throws a drink on you? Won't show. It's a win-win."

In all likelihood, he'll wear black regardless, but it's something to consider, at least.

Is he supposed to prepare a breakup outfit? No, surely not, he decides with a small shake of his head that goes unnoticed by Jimin.

"Alright then, hit me with rule number two."

Jimin grins as he sinks further into the sofa, pleased that Jeongguk is actually listening to him. As far as he's concerned, he has breaking hearts down to a fine art.

"Never - under any circumstances - send a 'we need to talk' text."

"But-"

"Never," he doubles down. "A we need to talk text means one thing and one thing only - she'll see what's coming from a mile away, and you need this to be a sting operation."

"Sorry?"

"Forgiven," he smirks, in typical Jimin fashion. "Nah, but seriously. If she catches wind of what you're gonna do, she'll get in there first. I've known girls like her, and I promise you - she'll end things before you get the chance."

"So?" Jeongguk asks as he gets to work slicing up the fruit that's been in the fridge for a little too long. It's not as pretty as it once was, but it needs eating, and there's nothing he likes more than starting the new year with a tidy and organised house.

"So?" he mimics, eyes on the television where he's watching a talk show he doesn't really care for. "My God , Jeongguk. Better to be the dumper than the dumpee."

Jeongguk thinks Jimin would be great on a talk show; always saying shit that holds no merit but with enough confidence, you'd be forgiven for thinking he was an expert.

"I don't think either is preferable," Jeongguk tells him - and he means it.

Ending things with Jiyeong is a necessity at this point. Not because of you, or residual feelings for Hayun, or anything like that - but for the fact he absolutely cannot stand her after she's had a few drinks.

She's pleasant, ever so nice, ever eager to please when she's sober, but the second a little tequila touches her lips? It's like another story.

Alcohol isn't for everyone. Working in a bar, Jeongguk has grown to learn this. He doesn't think she drinks too much - within a reasonable amount for any girl in her twenties - it's just that the chemicals in her brain seem to short-circuit. She gets jealous, and mean, and maybe it's his fault.

Maybe he could have been more attentive. Maybe his eyes do get distracted by the stars a little too often.

Sometimes, Jeongguk thinks it's okay; that maybe if he shifts her focus away from nights out and drinks over dinner, that it could work. Remove alcohol from the situation and it would be fine.

Thing is, his lifestyle is so heavily focused around it; Dionysus, nights out with the boys, his hopes for the future and the restaurant he so badly wants to open. It's always gonna be a factor of his future. Always gonna be a part of his lifestyle.

He doesn't want to argue for the rest of his life.

Doesn't want to attend Tae's art shows and worry that the free prosecco will end in a row over whether or not he spent enough time looking at her instead of the art.

Doesn't want to raise his glass for a toast at his wedding, only to go to bed without consummating the marriage because his new wife is in a huff over the hors d'oeuvres he'd insisted on during the planning stages of the big day.

Jeongguk works in difinitives. Thinks that dating is a test to see if you're compatible for long-term companionship. Knows that he and Jiyeong aren't . Doesn't wanna waste his time, nor hers.

"Well, no," Jimin admits as Jeongguk withdraws from his thoughts. "But in a lose-lose situation? Better to not be the biggest loser."

If he was being honest, Jimin would tell Jeongguk that he doesn't think this is a lose-lose situation at all. In fact, he thinks it's the best decision Jeongguk's made in a long time.

Jeongguk isn't so sure. Hasn't told you yet. Is a bit scared to do so. Worries you'll be disappointed. Knows he can't carry things on with another girl for your benefit, though.

Plus, he kind of wants Jiyeong to see it coming. Would make it far easier if she's the one to end things. Would alleviate some of the mental pressure.

"Final rule?" Jeongguk eventually sighs, knowing that Jimin won't change his stubborn ways of thinking, so he may as well hear him out.

"This one is the real kicker," Jimin acknowledges.

It's also the one that proves he does have a heart beneath the casanova exterior.

"It's the two-week rule," he explains, muting the TV and turning his body to face Jeongguk. He's still chopping up strawberries, using the board that suddenly appeared out of nowhere after Christmas. Jimin hasn't asked about it. Knows Yoongi made it, but that's all. "Birthdays, Christmas - big dates, you know the type. The week before and the week after them? You can't end it."

Jeongguk stops chopping. Looks up at Jimin. There's no smile on his face, just a little anguish in his round eyes, as if he's just found out Santa isn't real.

"What?" Jimin retorts. "That's the one I would have thought you already knew. It's common sense. You can't end things so close to a big event - especially if there's gift-giving involved."

"But-"

"Nope. It's a rule. New Year's counts, by the way," Jimin makes sure to add. "You gotta stick it out until the tail-end of January."

"According to who?"

"According to everyone who's ever had a relationship."

"But-"

"Really? This is the rule you're gonna argue against most? C'mon, Gguk."

The reality of the matter is that Jeongguk doesn't want to have to spend New Year's faking a smile and pretending like everything is fine, when it really feels like his head will implode at any given moment.

He glances over to the whiteboard by their fridge, which has a calendar marked out on it. It includes their schedules - Jeongguk's shifts, Tae's shows, Jimin's visits home, dinners at the Min's. Their lives are mapped out an enamel-coated sheet of steel, wiped away with a dry cloth every time the month changes.

In a couple of days, it will be time to start fresh again.

Jimin's been off work since Christmas eve, and won't be back in the office until the New Year.

Shift work makes Jeongguk's schedule a lot less predictable - but December 31st has been reserved for months now. As soon as December hit, Jimin had filled the entire space with bubble writing and explosive clouds. It's going to be big. It always is. His favourite night of the year.

Which is why, when he arrives home on the morning of New Year's Eve, snacks and drinks in hand for pregaming, he's confused that Jeongguk is nowhere to be seen.

There's been a change to the board, though.

DEC 31JK - work 6-12

~~~

They say that things tend to happen in threes, and - much like Jimin's rules for a break up - Yeonjun's already made three bets with Jeongguk by the time it hits 8PM on New Year's Eve.

The first? That he'll still be able to get a midnight kiss, even though he's behind the bar tonight.

"Don't even think about it," Jeongguk had warned, clear in his rules about not flirting with the punters too much - but Yeonjun is an insolent brat at the best of times.

He's also spent the last month or so sweet-talking Julia, a foreign exchange student who had picked up a couple of shifts a week to help tide her through, and that's where he's placing his bets.

Normally, Jeongguk would have noticed a flirtationship blossoming right beneath his nose. He's been so distracted lately, Yeonjun's been able to cross 'shag at work' off his bucket list without Jeongguk even suspecting a thing.

Even Jeongguk hasn't fucked anyone at work.

Yet .

Hair as blue as the off-brand curacao he's decanting into the 'real' bottles, Yeonjun is just as much of a menace as he always has been.

The second bet?

That Yeonjun can eat an entire lemon. Peel it, section it, eat it - like an orange or a clementine.

Jeongguk thinks he's joking - but Yeonjun's spunked away all of his money over the holidays, and needs to make up for it. Wins himself 50,000 won for that one. Also nearly has him head-first over the toilet, but that's neither here nor there.

The third and final bet?

Well, it's proven right at quarter past ten that evening.

Jeongguk is behind the bar, obscured by the club lights as the DJ plays an old song he's forgotten the name of. Knows all the words, but can't place it. Is so busy trying to figure it out, that he almost doesn't notice you arrive - but how can he not?

The lights quite literally reflect from you; your dress, your eyes, the glitter that adorns your skin. You've always been a disco ball personified, but never more so than right now.

You've not noticed him yet, too busy caught up in conversation with Danbi and Hoseok to pay him any attention. You're laughing, head thrown back, hand clutching onto Hoseok's shoulder to stop yourself from falling. Jeongguk can't hear your laugh, but he knows what it sounds like. Finds himself smiling, too.

"That'll be another 10,000," Yeonjun calls over to Jeongguk, and is met with a curt 'fuck off'.

A bet is a bet. Yeonjun is getting that 10,000, because he's right.

You do look more like a disco ball than ever before, just like Yeonjun prophesied you would.

Jeongguk always knew you would. It's why he rejected Yeonjun's first attempt at the bet - there was no way he'd willingly lose 50,000. Re-bet him at a much more sensible 10,000.

Unaware of the bet, and already a little too tipsy for your own good, you know that you've really outdone yourself. Know that if Seokjin happened to be at Dionysus - which he won't be - that he'd run for the hills.

Bleached hair growing out, glitter on every inch of your skin, dress as sparkly as the fireworks due to go off when the clocks strike twelve, you are everything he would have hated - which is exactly how you'd like to start the new year.

Jeongguk's grinning as you approach the bar. He's got a plastic cup in one hand, and the soft drink gun pouring from the other. Diet coke clouds into a puddle of vodka for some punter that Jeongguk barely gives a second thought to. He glances over to you, smile prevailing, cheeks almost a little pink, before his attention diverts back to the customer.

There are half a dozen people to serve before Jeongguk can get to you. Fairness is important, after all. Can't let you think you get priority over everyone else just 'cause you made him cum a couple of times. He doesn't stop smiling, mind you. Feels your gaze, and laughs to himself a little. Just can't help it.

When he finally makes time for you, you know you don't have long. It's busy.

He shouldn't be behind the bar.

He should be out having fun with you instead, you think. Or the boys. It doesn't matter. All that matters is him having a good time, regardless of who he's with.

"Didn't see you there," he tells you with a casual arrogance that makes your tipsy tummy feel all silly and ticklish. "Thought you were a disco ball for a moment."

He looks pretty today, hair tousled in that way he always does when he can't be bothered to style it properly. He's wearing a black button-up, but has left the top three of four buttons open. The top of his chest peeks out, chains layered and sitting handsomely against his skin. You're cursed with the knowledge of what he looks like without a shirt on, and a brain that doesn't know how to stop thinking about it.

It's at this point you realise it's going to be one of those nights.

You're only a few drinks in and already you're thinking that you'd really like to end your night with an orgasm - and unfortunately for you, you're well aware of how competently Jeongguk can give them.

You know he's off the cards as far as that's concerned, but for a harmless flirt? Well, what are friends for, if not that?

"Oh, really?" You beam, elbows resting on the bar, leaning a little closer so you can hear each other better. "Maybe I should take my dress off? Would that help?"

Jeongguk almost chokes on his own spit. You revel in the panic on his pretty features, all dainty and dewy and in need of a little glitter, you think.

He curses under his breath and shakes his head before he gets to work on a round of Purple Starfuckers, knowing that's what you'll be after.

"You're looking for trouble tonight, aren't you?" He asks as he sets the plastic shot glasses up in a row. Three. One for each of you.

"Not looking for anything," you assure him, and Jeongguk isn't sure why, but he's pleased with that answer. One less thing to worry about - though he does grab you a bottle of water from the cooler, regardless.

"Keep it with you," he says. "Big crowd tonight. It'll get hot."

You nod, eyes all doe-like and sincere in your thanks. Normally he just gives you a cup whenever you're at the bar, but he knows frequent visits will be harder tonight. Doesn't want you to be without water, should you need it.

He dips down again. Gets two more.

"Danbi and Hoseok," he simply states as he passes them over to you, indicating his intended recipients.

A mirrored backsplash runs behind the bar, allowing for you to watch Jeongguk as he works, even when his back is to you. There's a smile on his face, soft and serene, which drops a little when Yeonjun calls for his attention.

As Jeongguk turns, you notice a small spike of hair tufting up from the back of his head. It's most likely from falling asleep with damp hair after a shower, but it's so sweet you think you might be actually sick.

An enigma is Jeon Jeongguk; strong, brooding, broad. Tattoos etched into his skin, none of which you've asked the meaning of, and none of which he's elected to share. He's a mystery, all dark-eyed and chiselled-jawed, handsome without even trying.

And yet there are moments like these, when he's bright-eyed and bushy-tailed; jaw hanging a little lax, brows lifted to encourage Yeonjun to speak up. He's approachable; as kind as his smile is pretty.

He's everything your mother would tell you to stay away from, yet everything she'd encourage you to look for.

You suppose it doesn't really matter, either way. He's off the market, and you're not looking for any groceries, regardless.

There's no use squandering away one of your favourite friendships just because you have a pair of eyes and a functioning brain. Everyone thinks this way about Jeongguk. You're not the first person to notice he's a walking oxymoron - though when he lines up three extra shot glasses and begins to pour his signature drink into them, you realise he's arranged a dick-shaped formation, confirming that he might just be a moron, instead.

"Grow up," you laugh.

It's curious how sparkly his eyes always are in Dionysus. You think he has no right calling you a disco ball, when he's got a pair of them himself.

He checks his watch - silver, to match his chain - and sticks his bottom lip out as he reads it.

"Give it two hours and I'll be a year older," he teases, knowing full well the government abolished the traditional Korean ageing system, but not caring.

"Give it two hours and you'll still be an idiot," you reply, cheeks appled, glitter twinkling as lights reflect from the mirror and paint you in shades of magenta.

"Get your friends," he simply says, nodding towards them. "Drink up, or I'll make you pay for them, Disco Ball."

You don't mind it when he calls you this in the confines of Dionysus. It's nostalgic. Has you addressing him by the name you called him towards the start of your friendship, too.

"You spoil us, Star Fucker."

The irony of such a name isn't lost on Jeongguk. A Star Fucker is exactly what he is. Or was . Semantics.

He chooses not to reply to your statement, instead ushering you away. Tells you he's got people to serve. Says he's bored of you, but there's a smile etched into his cheeks as you wash down your shots. When you knock your head back, the glitter on your throat shines. It's decadant; irredescant.

And resting right where your collar bones meet, in the dainty little dip Jeongguk finds he likes a little too much?

A small silver bird.

He's so pleased to see it. Pleased , and a little shy and embarrassed that his affections for you are being displayed for all to see - but also a tiny bit smug, knowing that any fucker in the club who's drawn to your glitter will see evidence of him.

You aren't his, and he doesn't mean to think about it like that, but he likes that you've chosen to wear it. Likes that if somebody asks about it, you'll have to say, 'Oh, this? My friend Jeongguk got it for me.'

As you walk away, Jeongguk thinks you must leave a tail of fairy dust. He also thinks he needs his eyes testing whenever he's been looking at you for too long. Swears down he's got astigmatism.

You weave through the crowd with Danbi's hand in yours, and your other hand on Hoseok's waist, bottle of water tucked into your bag. As Hoseok guides you both to the centre of the crowd, you're reminded of why you like being absolutely shitfaced before dancing in clubs. The floor is sticky, and a non-descript soda-spirit drips down the back of your leg thanks to someone being too fucked to hold their cup properly.

It's part and parcel of places like these, though, and you know as soon as those Purple Starfuckers hit your system, you'll be grand. One would have done the trick, but two? Yeah, you'll be buzzing in a few minutes. S'why Jeongguk gave you two. Knows your tells. Could sense your levels.

You're lost to the night within a few minutes, but it doesn't stop Jeongguk from glancing to the crowd every now and again.

The boys arrive within ten minutes of you, and are the same rowdy gaggle they usually are. Yoongi is on his phone - checking that Seoyeon definitely will be at the club for midnight. She's getting ready with her girls. They'd opted for drinks at home for most of the night, unlike the boys who were mostly single and wanted to be out and about.

Jeongguk makes their usual orders and ignores the way they tease him for having to work. It was his choice. He did this to himself - and sure, he'd rather be on the other side of the bar, but when Jiyeong arrives a little while later, Jeongguk is glad for the distance.

He'd promised her and her friends a table to make up for his absence, and had allocated an extra bottle of prosecco to the table just to stop them from coming back to the bar. He doesn't wanna have to smile and pretend like everything is fine. She'll have expectations for the night, and he knows this.

There's lingering ache in his stomach; acknowledgement that he's doing something wrong.

He's not invested like he should be.

Jiyeong attracts attention. So do her friends. They dress similarly. Are indistinguishable from behind, save for a few highlights. Probably know the ins and outs of each other's lives. They likely know all about Jeongguk; the sort of cringe messages - the ones that are commonplace at the start of a relationship - that he's sent, the sweet gestures he's made, the genuine interest he's shown in her. They probably have an idea of what he looks like naked.

He does like her. Tells himself he does, at least. Smiles to himself when she jumps a little as the prosecco cork is popped by the table host. She has qualities he likes; determination, drive.

Perhaps if Jeongguk hadn't grown so soft, so insecure, they maybe things could have worked.

Before Hayun, he used to like fighting. Found it exciting. Had a girlfriend once that was much like Jiyeong. They'd bicker and argue until it ended up in the bedroom. A reset button would be pressed until the inevitable next time. He stayed with her for a year.

Occasionally, he'd argue with Hayun. When she was withdrawing, and he felt like he was losing grasp on a relationship that never really was a relationship, he'd cause a fight. Just something petty. Ask her why she'd been so avoidant, or question if she wanted to end things. Thought that maybe she'd work in the same way. Thought a reset button could be hit, and she'd want him again.

Sometimes it worked, but more often than not it didn't, which left Jeongguk in a constant sorry state of grovelling and trying to fix things. That never worked, either.

Sometimes Hayun would just fuck him to make him feel better.

Sometimes she'd ignore him for days on end.

The great unknown of which response he'd earn ended up cultivating a constant mess in Jeongguk's head. He was constantly seeking approval, constantly trying to be in her good books. He doesn't think she meant to make him this way, but it doesn't really matter.

He's never really let the scars settle. He picks at them until they bleed, and is surprised when they won't fully heal.

It's why he doesn't like arguing, now. It's why he avoids it as much as he can. It's why he sometimes lies. He's not malicious, just a product of the mistakes he's made in the past.

The memories fill his stomach like lead nails, weighing down on him, poisoning his bloodstream. They're so potent he almost thinks he can smell her perfume. She always wore the same one. He remembers it, still. It's french. Almondy. Expensive. Lingering. Unisex, so sometimes she'd spray him with it, too. Used to make him smile when he noticed it.

Makes him feel sick, now.

"Oi, boss man," Yeonjun calls over to Jeongguk as he's mindlessly making a couple vodka cokes. "Can we switch? She's asking for Star Fuckers."

Jeongguk laughs to himself. Why on earth you would have gone to Yeonjun is beyond him, but he kinda likes that you don't feel like you always have to go to him.

"Send her to my end," Jeongguk just calls back. His section is quieter than Yeonjun's at the moment, so it doesn't really make much difference. He's just served the last punters in the queue - two vodka cokes, no ice -and has time to kill. Get straight to it as you make your way up. Is surprised you're back so soon, but lines up 6 shot glasses regardless.

He turns to the back wall to grab the amaretto and is thinking about that perfume, again. Pushes the thoughts to the back of his mind, and thinks about the fact the DJ has definitely already played Stay, instead. He doesn't mind. Quite likes Justin Bieber. Demolishes the track in a noraebang.

Now that he's thinking about it, maybe that'd be a good way to end the night.

He goes to suggest it as he turns around - but the words catch on his tongue and dissolve into nothing; lyrics of a toxic relationship over a sickeningly cheerful melody drown out into silence, too.

"Hey," is all Jeongguk can muster.

A deer in headlights, eyes wide and bright, he isn't really sure what to do. His skin feels hot and prickly, but he's cemented in place. Can't escape. Can just stand, and stare.

And when Hayun stares back, a tiny smile fracturing on her red lips, Jeongguk thinks he'd quite like to die.

"Hey," she replies so quietly he can't hear her voice. The way her lips move - oh, it's just the same as it always was - has him entranced. She raises a thick, feathery brow as if to question his awkwardness. Her smile grows. "I'm not Medusa, buddy. You don't have to turn to stone."

Buddy .

God, it's like she driving those pretty red nails of hers straight through his heart. They match her lips. Perfect, and red, and poised to kill.

Jeongguk shakes himself together. Mentally, not physically.

In fact, physically, he's smooth as a smirk settles on his lips. It's all performative, but he learned to play the role so well. Has perfected it by this point.

"Sure about that?" Jeongguk says as he places the cocktail shaker down on the ledge behind the bar. "You're ugly enough to be her, buddy."

"Ouch," she laughs. Jeongguk thinks his ears are bleeding. "Back in town for all of five minutes and you're already making me wanna leave."

"Don't be a baby," he grins, convinced that if he acts normal, then maybe things will be normal. "You wouldn't have asked for Star Fuckers if you weren't looking for a little trouble."

There's a twinge of guilt panging in his stomach. He used a near identical line on you earlier.

She concedes, unaware of this. Unaware of you. Bites down on that ruby-red bottom lip of hers that Jeongguk used to know so well. "Yeah. You're right about one thing, buddy. Congrats."

"I'm right about everything," he protests.

The conversation is so easy. Just like it always was when things were good. She'd order his signature drink, and he'd watch on as she spent her night in a state of bliss with their friends until he could clock off and join them. She'd call him buddy, and he'd call her it right back, both knowing she'd end up in his bed at the end of the night. An in-joke, just for them.

When she looks at him like this - eyes sultry, a smokey eye framing them so effortlessly it's as if she was born with a kohl pencil in hand - he forgets how she would use the affectionate joke against him.

'We're just friends. I don't know why you're getting so emotional about this. I don't have to explain myself to you, buddy .'

But of course he has. Has wiped it from his memory, because it's far nicer to romanticise her than it is to demonise her.

"Didn't know you'd be back," he says as he pours her shot, trying to look ambivalent about it all.

She's toying with her card against the bar, her bare shoulders a stark reminder of what he used to have. Last time she was in Dionysus, Jeongguk didn't yet have a tab. Every drink was paid for on the spot. It's been so long since that was the case. Jeongguk finds that the stark reminder of how much time has passed makes his heart wilt a little bit. Has it really been that long?

"Nor did I," she shrugs, and Jeongguk tries to ignore the way her collarbones move so gracefully, her hair draping over them like a thin curtain obscuring something he once adored. "Last minute change of plans. Haven't seen the girls in a while, so-"

"Right," he nods. "The girls."

"And the boys," she offers him an inch, knowing full well he'll take a mile. Decides to just give it to him anyway. "And you. Missed my favourite bartender."

Favourite .

The word wraps itself around Jeongguk like satin ribbon, so soft and delicately smooth. Trails up around the back of his head, and covers his eyes; blinds him to anything other than her.

He wants to ask about her boyfriend. Doesn't wanna learn that he's over by the boys, engaging in drunken bonding with his friends. Chooses not to bring him up.

"Yeonjun?" Jeongguk just deflects.

Hayun nods. "Suppose so, considering I hear you've had a promotion? Bar manager, now?"

It's comforting, in a way, knowing that she acknowledges how much has changed. How much he's changed. The wreck of a man she left isn't the same man she's returning to. He's smug in this knowledge, and it prevails in the way he almost flirts .

"Ah, so you've been keeping tabs," he teases, to which she just rolls her eyes. "Sound a little obsessed, buddy."

Hayun holds back a smile. Her tongue rests between her teeth. There's so much she could say - but instead, she chooses to down her shot instead.

Jeongguk pours her another.

She knocks that back, too.

"Not with you," she eventually says. "With these?" She lifts the empty shot glass. "Yes."

The heaviness in Jeongguk's chest is obscured by the adrenaline that's rushing through his system.

The last time he'd seen Hayun, he'd been the one who'd had a few too many Star Fuckers. Ended his night slumped against his kitchen island, crying into his takeout pizza box.

It had been her last night out before moving up to Seoul. A long time coming, he'd always known that it was gonna happen eventually, but he still wasn't ready for when the time came.

'I don't know how I'm gonna be okay without you,' he'd admitted a little too candidly.

'You'll figure it out,' she had said. 'You always do, buddy.'

And she was right. These days, it feels like he has somewhat of a grasp on his life - one that he's only just been able to claw back from her. He pretends that you aren't the reason why.

So imposing is Hayun's presence, Jeongguk doesn't notice Jiyeong trying to catch his gaze from her table. Doesn't notice the frown on her face as she watches Jeongguk's conversation unfold. Doesn't notice as she walks to the bar - and truth be told, barely notices when she comes to stand by Hayun.

But Jiyeong isn't the kind of girl to go unnoticed. It's just not who she is - and she'll be damned if she's ignored .

"Hey, honey," she greets, sickly sweet, just like the moniker she's never called him before this very moment.

Jeongguk's focus is on her immediately. Gaze fervent, he's like a kid who got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Heart in his throat, it's a miracle that he manages to look as poised as he does.

"Ji," he smiles. Is kind as he addresses her. "You good?"

She nods, pleased by the way he ended his conversation for her. A priority is what Jiyeong thinks she should be, and will only be happy when she's treated as such. It's not an unreasonable desire, he thinks.

Hands resting on the bar, Jeongguk doesn't really realise how clammy they are until Jiyeong reaches over to toy with one of them.

Jeongguk glances over to Hayun. It's a split second, but enough to see her eyes are on Jiyeong's hands, watching the way they trail up Jeongguk's tattooed wrist.

Hayun decides rather quickly that Jiyeong is a bitch pissing on her territory. Doesn't take too kindly to it.

"All good," Jiyeong smiles, ignoring Hayun. "Wondered if you were taking your break soon?"

"Hey, buddy," Hayun interrupts, not looking at Jiyeong, but at Jeongguk. He feels like an elastic band being stretched to its breaking point. "I'm gonna go catch up with the guys. I'll see you later, yeah?"

Jeongguk's tummy squirms. Hayun inserting herself into 'the guys' is deliberate, and he damn well knows it.

"Oh?" Jiyeong exclaims, feigning ignorance to the fact Hayun had been conversing with Jeongguk. "You know each other? Sorry, I should have introduced myself!"

She holds out her hand for Hayun to shake, but it's met with a contemptuous look and a glance towards Jeongguk as if to question his choices. She knows exactly what Jiyeong is doing. Has done it herself a handful of times before.

Also thinks it's laughable, because she stuck her flag in Jeongguk a long fuckin' time ago, and she's almost positive it's still there. As far as she's concerned, this new girl? She's just visiting.

"Jiyeong," she continues regardless, all smiles. The hand that's still toying with Jeongguk's wrist gets a little scratchy. She wants him to hold it. He knows this. Isn't sure what the right move is. Doesn't know who he'd rather piss off, but decides he likes Jiyeong so much more when she isn't mad at him. She smiles as he opens his palm for her. "Jeongguk's girlfriend. And you are?"

On a technicality - so much in the fact that he hasn't asked her to be - Jiyeong is not Jeongguk's girlfriend.

Right now, though? Safer to pretend she is.

"I'm an old friend," Hayun simply smiles, before turning back to Jeongguk. "I'll be with our friends, buddy. Have a good night."

He nods, and tries not to watch as she walks away. There's a queue forming, and he knows he needs to get back to work, but it feels like his head is gonna cave in.

Jiyeong is unashamed as she stares Hayun out, watching her walk over to Taehyung, who greets her with a hug that confirms she really is an old friend. Whatever history they have together, Jiyeong knows that Hayun will always have known Jeongguk longer. Will have known him better, at some point. It's irrational, but she doesn't like it.

"Need a drink?" Jeongguk asks her, not wanting to deal with any sourness. Knows he needs to get back to serving the punters lined up by the bar, but needs to remedy her woes first. Keep it sweet.

When Jiyeong speaks, the syrupy tone of her voice that she'd used with Hayun has turned incredibly bitter. "An old friend?"

Jeongguk doesn't respond immediately. Just sort of looks at Jiyeong. Wonders how someone so beautiful can make him feel so ugly on the inside.

"Hayun," Jeongguk confirms. "She's known us for years."

He's quick to make it about the group, and not just himself. He knows he's avoiding a difficult topic, but now's not the time. There are punters trying to get his attention. His eyes scan the crowd. This is too much for him to deal with right now.

He slips his hand away from hers, and takes an order from the girl beside her. 'Rum and coke, please.'

"You've never mentioned her before," Jiyeong decides to carry on the conversation as Jeongguk works. He wants to scream. Keeps his cool regardless.

"She lives in Seoul," he simply states. "Is never normally here."

"She's here now."

Jeongguk just shrugs, before turning to the girl and accepting her card. He gives a closed-lip smile, as if to apologise for the awkwardness. She's a little shy - definitely younger, maybe only about twenty - and her cheeks flame a little red from the eye contact.

Jiyeong doesn't like that either.

"Clock off," she says to Jeongguk as he passes the girl back her card. "At midnight. Clock off for midnight."

"That's not how jobs work, Ji."

Except it kind of is, for Jeongguk. He doesn't need to be working. He volunteered himself for this. Can come and go as he likes. The other manager is also on tonight. He's not 'on duty', as such - just a regular bartender. He's not needed.

He's choosing this.

"Well, fine," she hisses, and that's when Jeongguk knows how this conversation is gonna end. Same way conversations like these always do. "Maybe I've got 'old friends' in other bars."

"Maybe you do," he says flatly, as he smiles at the next customer. "What can I get for you guys?"

Jiyeong doesn't seem to care for his diverted attention.

"I do," she insists. Wants a rise out of him. "I don't need to be here."

"So don't be," Jeongguk snaps. He knows he shouldn't have, but his head's all over the place and he can't be fucked with another petty argument over nothing .

He listens to the order - three jack daniels and lemonade - and sets about making them. The music is loud, but it's not enough to drown her out.

"Fine," she says as she reaches for his hand when he goes to grab the soda gun. She wants his attention on her, and not some fucking customer. They're replacable, she thinks. She isn't. "I will go to another bar, and when it hits midnight, I will kiss someone else. If you let me leave, that's what will happen."

He knows that if she was sober, she likely wouldn't be acting out like this. The fact he's sober is probably amplifying his irritation, but there's a time and a place for this.

"Well, what do you want me to do?" Jeongguk pulls his hand back. Picks up the soda gun and fills the plastic cups. The lemonade bubbles, fizzing over ever so slightly, but Jeongguk is too annoyed to care for accurate pours. Hands over the drinks, takes the customer's card, and then finally says, "You want me to chase you? I'm fucking working , Jiyeong."

There's a heat that comes with being inside a club, even in the depths of a freezing winter. Clammy bodies make the air steam, drinks sticky on the floor, slurred words misconstrued. No point crying over spilt liquor, though.

It's something Jeongguk is wise to. Has seen enough catfights to last a lifetime. Knows how easily the wrong choice of words can catapult decades-long friendships into the firing line. The same girls he'd see arguing would be back the next week, smiles on their faces, fingers laced together, affection evident.

It's different, when both parties are trashed. Forgiveness is more freely given. Mistakes made under the influence are chalked up to bad decisions never to be repeated.

The way Jiyeong repeatedly starts fights with him, without fail, every single time she gets a little tipsy isn't a mistake. It's a deliberate choice.

"I want you to care!" She scathes. "I want you to care about the idea of someone else kissing me! I want you to care enough to stop it from happening!"

Jeongguk laughs now. Really fucking laughs. Passes back the customer their card and then gives Jiyeong the attention she so desperately craves.

"Nah, let's call this what it really is, Ji," he sneers back, voice laced with agitation, nostrils flared. "You're making up hypotheticals to manipulate me into doing what you want-"

She laughs. It isn't pretty. "So now you're making me out to be the bad guy? Great."

"No, I'm not," he stresses, exasperated, talking with his hands because he doesn't know how to convey his frustration. "You just don't have to do any of those things! You don't have to leave, don't have to fucking get with someone else, don't have to fight with me over shit that hasn't happened yet-"

"No, I see how it is," she snaps. "You want me to leave."

"Honestly?" he shrugs, because what more can he do? He's reached his limit. "At this point Jiyeong, I don't give a fuck."

"Fine," she hisses. "If you let me leave, that's it. We're done."

"What?"

"If you let me leave, we're done."

Un-fucking-believable .

"You're like a fucking toddler just trying to push boundaries. I'm not your parent, Ji. This is never gonna work if you keep pulling shit like this."

She shrugs. Smiles in an ambivalent way that Jeongguk knows should scare him - but he's beyond the point of caring. He never should have listened to Jimin. Should have trusted his gut.

One of the drinks Jeongguk has just served is still on the bar, awaiting a pair of clammy hands to pick it up and quench the thirst of a shit-faced uni student. They're too slow. Jiyeong gets to it first.

She's like a cat in the way she smirks as the back of her hand flicks against it, sending the drink flying straight into Jeongguk's chest. It splashes down his abdomen, soaking his tummy, trickling down the top of his trousers.

Jimin's three rules of a breakup may work for him, but Jeongguk's never been like that. He isn't made for shit like this. He's a people pleaser, but he's growing to realise there's just no pleasing some people.

And as Jimin's first rule - 'always wear black' - is proven to be pretty solid advice, Jeongguk's head is even more of a mess than it was before. He doesn't know what to do. Doesn't know how to react. No one has ever pulled shit like this with him before. Not a punter, not a friend, not a girl.

"Oh no," she pouts, all dramatic and pathetic, as the cup drops to the floor. "I guess I'm just a toddler pushing boundaries ."

Jeongguk says nothing. Grates his jaw. Looks down at his chest where the fabric is clinging to his torso. The lemonade is gonna go sticky. He fucking hates being sticky.

"Maybe that old friend of yours can help dry you off?" Jiyeong smiles - but it's wiped from her face as Jeongguk glares at her in a way she's never seen before. Very few people ever get him like this - but the boundaries she's pushed have been tested beyond repair. There's no going back from this.

In other circumstances, he might let it slide - but public humiliation in his place of work is just cruel .

Those definitives Jeongguk dates in are at the forefront of his mind. He's looking for someone to share his life with. If he doesn't see a future, then he sees no point in carrying it on, and he's pissed off at himself for letting this go on for as long as it has.

He wants a family one day, and the idea of his kids having a cruel mother makes his skin crawl. Kindness, in abundance, is what he'd like to cultivate and, quite frankly, he doesn't think Jiyeong's willing nor able to offer that.

And so Jeongguk is clear, voice loud above the music as he says, "We're done."

Jiyeong laughs. The sound stutters in her throat, disbelief etched into her tipsy features.

"What?"

"I don't want this," he says, gesturing between them both. "Us. This. I don't want it."

Punters waiting by the bar look on with bemused horror. No one really has a clear grasp on what's happened, but they know it isn't good. Know that Jeongguk - mild-mannered, placid, Jeongguk - is fuming. He's so well recognised amongst Dionysus regulars that the idea of getting on his bad side is unfathomable.

Or at least it was.

Jiyeong pauses for a moment. The cogs in her brain are turning. She's aware she fucked up, but is too headstrong to admit it.

In his heart of hearts, Jeongguk knows that no one wants a relationship like this. Jiyeong likely doesn't, either. Is probably the product of her past traumas; boys who behaved in the way that she is right now.

Jeongguk's avoidant because Hayun was avoidant.

He knows you're fearful of commitment because Seokjin found it impossible.

Jiyeong probably pushes boundaries because she was burned by a boy who did the same.

But just because it's true doesn't make it right.

"Look, I don't wanna fight," Jeongguk sighs as he reaches for a cloth to pat himself down with. Yeonjun's clued himself into what's happening. Has moved up the bar, and is diverting Jeongguk's punters to him, instead. It's appreciated and will be repaid at a later date, but for now, Jeongguk needs to try and diffuse the situation. "But this just... this is fucking ridiculous, Ji. This isn't right. You know it isn't."

"We can make it right," she says now, as if Jeongguk's softness is making her realise that maybe she could be soft, too - but it's too late. His mind is made up. Has been for weeks, now.

"No," he replies quietly with a shake of his head. He doesn't want to cause further upset, but he can't keep lying to himself. It's not fair on either of them. "I don't think we can."

She says nothing. Just keeps looking at him as if he's gone insane.

"We can talk about this another time," he promises. "Not here. Not now. Not when you're drunk."

And then, all rather suddenly, as if she's forgotten that these are consequences of her own actions, Jiyeong is displeased. Turns her nose up. Tells him to ' get fucked ', as if that's gonna help the situation.

When she storms off in a huff, he doesn't stop her. Refuses to chase. He's not a fucking dog. Isn't gonna wait by her feet just in case she throws him a bone, like she hopes he will.

He tilts his head to the side. Shakes it a little. Sighs. His shirt is soaked through, and he knows he's gonna feel fucking horrible in a little while thanks to the soda syrup. He wouldn't care so much if he was getting fucked up with his friends, but he's void of anything to intoxicate him.

When he glances over to Jiyeong's table, her gaggle of friends have already left, so he assumes she has, too. The knowledge of this doesn't alleviate any stress like he half thinks it should. Just makes him feel like a failure all over again.

He can't stand looking at everyone smiling and having a good time, so he turns to rest his palms on the back bench of the bar. Drops his head, chin to his chest. Breathes. Fuck sake.

For all of her flaws, Jiyeong was proof that he'd managed to get himself over whatever the fuck Hayun put him through. Without her, what's he got to show for it all?

"Take 5," Yeonjun calls over to Jeongguk. He glances over to see Yeonjun's cerulean hair a mess, exhaustion on his features - but the queue is entirely gone. "I mean it, Boss. Take 5. I've got it covered."

Jeongguk's stare lingers, but eventually, he nods. Doesn't want to fight against anyone, not even Yeonjun. Does as he's told. Knows that the kid is gonna be cherry-picked for his job whenever Jeongguk leaves Dionysus, so figures he may as well give him a taste for authority.

That, and Jeongguk also really does need to take five.

The pressure of his fingertips against the smooth steel pins as he taps in the staff room code is welcome; a reminder that people aren't supposed to be hard. The pads of his fingertips are soft, and so is he.

Scattered in possessions that belong to his friends, the staff room is remarkably quiet compared to the main club. The sofas are empty, cups by the sink, too. There's a white shirt slung over the back of a chair, left there from the paint party all those months ago. It's the one he had brought along for you, but it seems like he needs it now.

His fingers work downwards, threading buttons through the silky fabric, releasing his body from the prison of a damp shirt. It rests open, but still clings towards the bottom where it's the most saturated in fucking Jack Daniels. He's always hated the stuff. Hates the smell. Reminds him of Tae's 19th birthday. Years later, he still can't stomach it.

Jeongguk is tired. Mentally, physically, he's exhausted. Has spent the last couple of weeks trying to hold it all together, when all he's wanted was to crumble like chalk from an eroding cliff edge. The nets that have been holding him in place have been torn through, or so it feels like.

Sinking into the sofa with a small thud, Jeongguk can't figure out how every single decision he makes seems to be so disastrous. Surely life is so supposed to be easier than this?

He rubs his ink-covered hand over his face, pushing it back into his hair. Lets his head hang back over the sofa and up towards the ceiling. There are a dozen beige marks on what should have been a paper white canvas; water damage from years of disrepair. The hidden secret of clubs is truly how decrepit they really are. Nobody notices when the lights are off, and there are disco balls obscuring the ugliness of it all.

It doesn't take much for you to find your way back into his mind. It's rude, how often you intrude. He should start charging you rent.

A soft smile settles on his lips as he thinks about how easy it is with you. None of those complicated feelings that come with Hayun, and none of the aggro that accompanies Jiyeong. Wishes everything could be as simple as the way he feels about you.

As he sits up a little straighter, his eyes fall on a pair of heels. They're next to your coat, chucked in the corner of the room, a little out of the way. They sparkle, even under the dull light of the staff room. Encrusted with diamonds that he knows are just little fakes, they match your dress.

Part of him wishes he hadn't taken up that bar shift.

Would have just made Purple Star Fuckers in the staff room with you every half an hour or so. Would have definitely pissed off Yeonjun with how frequently he was hopping behind the bar, but who cares? Would have been worth it.

A small box of plasters is perched on top of your coat; wrappers, too. He looks down to his feet. Wonders if you changed into your Chucks. Maybe you match. He likes the idea of that.

Legs spread, hands resting over his thighs, Jeongguk tips one of his feet ever so slightly to get a better look at the inner trim of his sole. By his ankle, beneath the classic all-star logo, there are tiny scratch marks on the rubber.

Before he'd taken a corkscrew to the shoes in this very room, there used to be a small 'H' there.

Used to wear them to keep her close. Wears them now 'cause it makes him laugh whenever you twin.

"The fuck are you doing?" He mutters to himself. Doesn't understand why he's even comparing.

Except he does.

It's been nearly a month and a half since he woke up to you in his bed, glitter all over his pillows. His sheets have been through the wash twice since then. Still finds glitter on his skin. Can't shake you. Is reminded of you every time tiny specks catch in the light. You're under every golden sunset and in every night sky. You consume him; eclipse him.

He'd take the darkness, though. Scared of the dark, but doesn't mind it if it means he can see you.

The distance has been unhelpful. Jeongguk overthinks. Lets his mind get away from himself. Needs to talk to you to remind himself of your dynamic; to remember how good things are as they are. Can't be fucking things up just 'cause his head's a bit of a mess.

He mumbles to himself as he stands up to change his shirt. Laments his past choices. Knows that he ruined his friendship with Hayun because he let his mind run away with the possibilities of 'what if?' and refuses to let the same thing happen again. It's not worth the heartache. Not when you guys have such a good thing going.

He pulls the white shirt over his head, and checks himself over in the mirror on the back of the door. His chains rest on top of the fabric, but he's not sure whether or not he should tuck the shirt into his trousers or let it hang loose. Eventually, he unbuckles his belt and adjusts his pants so that he can arrange his shirt a bit more freely, opting for tucked-in. You always mention how much you like his belt whenever it's on show, so he figures this looks better.

There's a side table by the door, and on it are a handful of novelty headbands for the night. He needs a bit of a pick me up, so he reaches for the most ridiculous one - silver and sparkly, 'HAPPY NEW YEAR' written in chunky plastic lettering over the top of it. He pushes it back through his hair as if it's a pair of sunglasses, and decides that'll do. His chest might be hidden now, but his forehead is out. What a treat.

He's barely gotten through the door when he spots you zooming up to the bar, most definitely trashed. Your little hands grip onto the bar to keep you from losing your balance, and your smile is borderline insane - but it gets Jeongguk smiling too.

You gasp. "An outfit change?! You didn't tell me we were doing outfit changes!" And then you pout. "You're gonna upstage me, Gguk."

"Impossible," he jokes. "I'm not half sparkly enough."

Glancing towards his little headband, you decide you must have it. It's a fault of yours, how often you like to... acquire ... things when you've been drinking. Lighters, hair accessories, the occasional street sign in your youth, there was little you didn't want when you'd been drinking.

He notices the way your eyes are glued to it, and smirks. "Jealous?"

"Immensely," you confirm without any hesitation. You sort of look like a puppy waiting for its owner to finish a slice of toast. "In fact, I have a proposition for you."

"Go on," he grins, crossing his arms over. You wish he wouldn't look at you like that; chin tilted upwards, tongue on the inside of his cheek, heavy-lidded eyes baiting you out. Especially not when you're as tipsy and prone to making god-awful decisions as you are. "I'm listening."

"I am prepared to offer you a trade," you begin to bargain, a cheeky glint in your eyes.

"A trade?"

"A trade," you nod, before you start rummaging around in your bag. Jeongguk watches with great curiosity, wondering what on earth you've got crammed in there - until you pull out a thin tube covered in sparkles. "Gimmie the headband and I'll give you glitter."

It's not a fair trade. You know it's not a fair trade. His headband is everything .

And yet Jeongguk doesn't even try to negotiate - just reaches up for the headband and leans across the bar to position it in your hair for you. He takes his time - makes sure it's perfectly placed - then rests his elbows on the bar, his chin in his hands.

"Glitter me up, Disco Ball."

There's genuine delight in your eyes as he says those words, and Jeongguk finds himself smiling in that compressed sort of way he does, tiny puffs forming beneath his eyes, nose scrunched, front teeth on show. He looks like a little bunny, and you think it's appropriate given that you're about to enter the year of the rabbit.

You squeak out a small 'yay' as you begin to unscrew the tube. He's never seen you put your glitter on, but this definitely isn't how he ever imagined it. He always just sort of assumed you sat there with a pot of craft-grade glitter and some sort of glue. Never considered that you put it on like lipgloss.

"Might be cold," you warn as you begin to dab the applicator against his cheeks. It shimmers and shines beneath bare lights, and you're amazed that you've never done this before. Jeongguk's skin is to die for. No better canvas. No better person.

Your fingers gently clasp his jaw, pulling him a little closer. "You look so pretty."

Jeongguk's smile is all bashful. He tells you to fuck off. Assures you he looks very manly.

"I like the white tee, black slacks combo," you admit. "And glitter can be manly, too."

"It can?"

"You're a man, no?"

There's a closeness to this position; one that has you forgetting that you're in a club, surrounded by dozens of people who will all be drawing their own conclusions over whatever is happening by the bar. You learned a long time ago that you can't control other people's narrative of you. If they think a certain way? Make assumptions? Let them.

You also can't control Jeongguk's eyes, and the way they flick down ever so briefly to your lips as your talk.

It means nothing. Jiyeong is here, or at least you think she is. Jeongguk knows better than to fucking flirt when she's around. Again, you think she's nearby.

You're unaware of what transpired. You don't know he's wearing an outfit you like so much because she'd decided to lose her cool. Are none the wiser of the fact that Jeongguk ended things. Sure it wasn't clear cut, and he'll likely need to have another conversation with her to fully establish their parting of ways, but as far as he's concerned, he's done with her.

He doesn't tell you this. He won't tell you. Not yet. After the evening has passed, maybe.

But not now. He knows you'll make him talk about it, and truthfully he wants to forget it. Wants to stargaze.

And now that he is? Fuck .

Fifteen minutes to midnight, and all Jeongguk can think about is your rules, and how much he hopes you won't break them for a stranger.

Doesn't want you to break them for him, either - you're off your tits and he can't even begin to start playing catch up until the clock strikes twelve. Just wants you to be safe. That's all.

Unaware of the workout he's giving his brain, you pull back from Jeongguk to study your work. The glitter is iridescent; purple pink hues scattered over the tops of his cheeks. He looks so charming that you squeal again. You simply adore the way he shines.

"Wait, wait," you say quietly, encouraging him to lean closers again. "Pout."

He does. It's cute. He sort of looks like a little emoji, all puckered and a little embarrassed, trying to stifle his giggle. You trace the wand of your glitter over the top ridge, delicately dappling his cupids bow in teeny tiny traces of glitter.

You pull away again to take in the sight of him. So pretty and ethereal. You want to fill his tattoos in with glitter, too, but you'd miss midnight if you did. Maybe next time.

"There," you smile. "That way you won't be able to deny it when Tae is your new year's kiss. You'll both be covered in it."

Jeongguk laughs. Shakes his head. Thinks you're stupid. Thinks you're cute, too.

The headband holds some of your hair back, much like it did with his, and Jeongguk is pleased. Your constellations deserve to be admired in their full glory.

"Star fucker?" He just asks.

You nod. Of course. You'll never turn one down.

"Can I get a drink to go, too?" You chance.

He points up towards the vodka, just to check, and is pleased when you nod. He knows you well, it would seem. Holds up one finger, then two, asking if you want a single or double.

You hold up three fingers. He rolls his eyes, smile prevailing - but makes you a double with a separate side shot, just in case you wanted to down it and use your drink as a chaser. You narrow your eyes, almost as if you're questioning his choices. Thing is, you trust him. Are aware that he has his reasons for doing things in the way that he does.

And so you take your shot and use the drink as a chaser.

"You'll miss new years," Jeongguk says, nodding to the frankly far-too-large screen behind the DJ, which already has a countdown on the screen. There's still about ten minutes to go. "You gonna break your rules tonight?"

It takes your brain a second to compute what he means. You furrow your brows, lips parting as you hum a confused little squeak - until you realise.

Laughing, you hold up your drink, and press a delicate kiss to the plastic cup. When your eyes close, Jeongguk is reminded of just how much you shine under club lights. It's a crying shame you don't kiss more people, he thinks.

Not that he'd like watching it. Just that he likes your glitter. Can see it better this way.

"Vodka is the only thing I'll be kissing," you assure him. The way you smile, all tipsy and giggly, gets him smiling, too. Then you correct yourself. "Maybe Danbi, too, but she doesn't count."

And she'll also likely be kissing Taehyung, if the way they've been flirting for the last six months is anything to go by.

"So you're allowed to kiss friends?" He grins, teasing you for your self-imposed rules.

"Friends who I don't fuck," you nod, with a smug smirk on your face - before you realise what you've said and how horribly inappropriate it is. There's a panic in your eyes as you backtrack, hand flailing about. "No, I don't mean- Like, I mean- Fuck. We don't fuck. I mean we did, but that was like once-"

"Twice."

"Don't get technical on me," you laugh. "Doesn't count. Either way, I didn't mean it like that." You look around, checking that Jiyeong isn't anywhere close, still totally unaware of the fight, or the fact she even left.

Jeongguk seems to be aware of who you're looking for. His lips settle into a small, almost unnoticeable, frown.

But you notice.

Of course you notice.

"Whatsup?"

He just shakes his head. "Nothing. Scarper, you little freeloader, or I'll charge you for that drink."

"Noted," you grin, distracted by the way he smiles, now. "If you're allowed, you should be with us all when New Year's hits. Or I can stay by the bar? I don't know where Jiyeong is, but-"

"I'll come find you guys," Jeongguk nods before you finish your sentence. Smiles, still. Seems sincere.

"Okay," you say quietly, a pleased look upon your face. You hate the idea of him watching on as you all celebrate without him. He's so important. You think it wouldn't be worth celebrating without him there with you. "Good. See you next year."

He laughs in that way he so often does whenever you say or do dumb shit. "See you next year, Byeol."

He loses you to the night once more, but doesn't imagine it will be for long.

The brightness of the LED screen counting down the time makes everything feel a little brighter. The DJ is hyping up the crowd as you work your way back to your friends. There's a girl who's taken your spot next to Tae, but Jimin notices you immediately and beckons you closer.

"DB," he slurs, as he pulls you in for a hug so tight you swear your back cracks. "Thought we'd lost you."

Shaking your head, you giggle against his neck which makes Jimin shiver a little bit. "Was by the bar with Gguk."

"How is he?" Jimin asks as he pulls away from you.

"All good-"

"What?" Jimin shouts as he leans closer. It's so much louder here than it is down by the bar. You position yourself next to his ear and explain that Jeongguk will join you all at midnight. Jimin is incredibly pleased to hear this. "Perfect. The night is young, but so are we, Disco Ball. Drink up!"

And so you do. You've nearly finished the drink Jeongguk made you already. You only stop yourself from finishing it off because you feel a presence next to you that puts you on edge a little bit.

Jimin's on the other side of the circle now. Notices the way she leans in a little to make herself known to you. Knows you, and knows how you'd go to bat for Jeongguk against anyone - especially anyone who has done him wrong. He wonders if he should intervene - but then Hoseok starts dancing in a way Jimin didn't realise was humanly possible and he feels challenged. No one outdances him. Ever . And yet Hoseok? Yeah Hoseok is giving him a run for his money, and he's too drunk to focus on more than one thing at a time.

Like you, Jimin would also go to bat for Jeongguk against anyone. Now that he realises you're both full of shit, and suit one another better than a yakult-soju mix, he wouldn't even dream of approaching you in a more than friendly manner. He'll still flirt a little, but he flirts with everyone. Jeongguk included.

He's the only one who really understands the gravity of the interaction that's about to happen - but he's also far too concerned with the fact Hoseok's body seems to defy gravity.

And so no one else really notices the way she encroaches on your space as you're glancing over to Jeongguk, making sure the queue isn't too long. You don't want him to miss his chance to join you all for New Year's.

"I thought Jeongguk had a girlfriend?" The girl beside you purrs.

"Hmm?" You hum with a little surprise, not expecting her to start a conversation with you. She obviously knows him, but you can't place her. "He's seeing someone."

She nods, eyes still on Jeongguk, watching on as he serves a small group of girls. His smile is ever-present, but he isn't as lively as he was with you. Doesn't look at them all starry-eyed. You pretend not to be pleased.

"Not sure how I'd feel about some girl going up to my boyfriend like that," she shrugs, sipping on her drink.

You glance over to her now, affronted by the tone in which she's speaking to you - as if you hadn't quite literally been the one to set Jeongguk up with Jiyeong. You're hardly a threat. You don't think anyone could be a threat, 'cause you've got a pair of working eyes and are incredibly aware that Jiyeong looks like she belongs in the fucking Louvre.

"Sorry?"

"Just saying. I wouldn't be happy with some girl all over my boyfriend like that."

The girl with the attitude problem wears a shade of red on her lips that you know must leave stains. If you were being critical, you'd tell her that she should go for a colder-hued red. The orange base of her choice washes her out a little bit.

But the lighting is bad, and you're sure it looks better under natural lighting. You're just being bitchy 'cause, well, she's being bitchy. At least you don't let your bitchiness out of its cage.

Much .

"Her boyfriend is a multidimensional human being, who has an identity and a life outside of his relationship," you assure her. It sounds great in your head, but in reality, it's a little incoherent because of all the vodka in your system. Jeongguk's get-fucked-up-quickly hack of a separate shot and double-chaser is doing its job. "Regardless, I'm hardly a threat. I literally set them up. He's, like, my best friend. It's not like that with us."

She snorts. "Right. Sure you are."

"Sorry?"

"Well I've never heard of you," she smiles. "And I'm pretty sure if you asked him who his best friend is, he'd say it was me."

The vodka in your system burns . It's like someone's taken a lighter to your liquor-soaked tongue just to watch the flames trickle down your throat.

The penny drops, shattering on the ground like a pane of glass. This is Hayun.

If you acknowledge your awareness of who she is, it will only confirm that she's a prominent part of his life, even in her absence - but equally there's nothing you'd love more than to put her in her place. Hayun has been a thorn in your side since before you ever learnt her name, and no amount of rose-red lipstick can make you think prettily of her.

Jeongguk is your best friend. He and Danbi are incomparable, but both play fundamentally important roles in your life. Both are deserving of the title, you think.

Your days are better for knowing him. You're not entirely sure if he'd say the same, but you're pretty certain he thinks fondly of the life he's experienced since knowing you.

There are, at least, no residual memories of hurt. You know he won't look at you and be reminded of what rock bottom feels like - and that's pretty nice to know, even if it isn't nice knowing he once was there.

"Word of advice?" You simply hum. "If you wanna fight over Jeongguk, do it with Jiyeong. I'm not interested, you possessive little weirdo. You'll get a much more interesting rise out of her than you will from me."

Maybe name-calling is a little immature, but it's better than calling her a raging cunt and pretending she has lipstick on her teeth just to make her squirm. You might still do that last part.

"I'm not interested in a fight," she says vacantly, a smug smile etched on her ruby-red lips. "I just know Jeongguk. I know what happens to the girls he becomes 'besties' with. I wasn't the first 'best friend' he had, and I doubt I'll be the last. Doubt you will be, either."

Your exterior is icy, but something about her words troubles you. You've never tended to think of yourself as special, but you also didn't think you were insignificant, either.

Admittedly, there's also nothing you hate more than the idea of men only befriending women so they can bed them. You've had friends in the past that have dropped you once they realised you weren't interested in pursuing anything romantic.

Jeongguk's never given you those vibes - but you have also fucked him, so it makes it a little more complex. Her words get under your skin, and you detest her for it.

She's rattled you - and for what? It's nearly midnight. You don't want to be having this conversation right now.

"You're being awfully repugnant for someone who isn't interested in a fight," you simply smile, deciding that playing nice isn't what you want to do.

Sure, it might annoy Jeongguk if it gets back to him, but so what? You're not obligated to be nice to everyone he likes. You try your best not to be too quick with judgements, but your opinion of Hayun has been rotting for a while now; festering in the deepest, darkest part of your brain.

If she had tried being nice to you, then maybe it would be a different story - but she decided to get petty first.

You shouldn't stoop to her level, you know, but you're about six star fuckers deep, and that's before you even consider the vodka cokes Hoseok's been keeping topped up all night. You're trashed . It's a miracle you can even stand straight.

It's partially thanks to the fact your balance has improved tenfold since taking up pole with Danbi, but also because you changed your shoes. Switching from heels to converse? Game. Changer.

"You've got a mouth on you," she assesses. Turns her nose up. You want to flick her stupid shiny forehead. "He normally prefers the nice types."

"Well, then it's a good job it doesn't matter what 'type' I am, then, isn't it?" You reply, not caring for this weird little drama she's making out of a simple interaction. Storm in a teacup, you think. "He's just a friend. Like you are. You're just his friend."

Hayun doesn't bite back this time. She stews. Sips on her drink.

"Surely - yanno, as his best friend - you should want him to have lots of friends? Want him to have a thriving social life?" You add. "Instead of trying to chase away people who care about him?"

"Ah, so you're more about quantity over quality," she nods. Smirks. "I see."

And sure, you could be the bigger person. You could just walk away in silent protest. You could be mature about it all.

You could go to the bar, and order a drink, and question Jeongguk's taste in women - but he could probably do the same back to you.

While there's a lingering fear that speaking unkindly to Hayun will earn you a place in Jeongguk's bad books, you decide that it's worth it. He might be blind to the fact she's an insufferable twat with as much decorum as a flooded sewer grate, but you aren't.

You're also drunk, which isn't helping in the slightest. All you wanted was a fun evening to say farewell (and fuck off) to what's been a pretty awful year. Being in her presence was never part of your plan, and you're actually a bit annoyed with Jeongguk for not at least warning you.

"I'm 'more about' you shutting the fuck up, actually," you finally snap. "Don't give a shit about your weird little Jeongguk fixation, but it's gotten real boring real fast. Now if you don't mind, Yunnie , I'm gonna go enjoy New Years with my friends. I would wish you a happy new year, but I couldn't give a fuck." The drink in your hand is finished off; down your throat in one final, rather undignified, swig. You turn to look at her, smile, and hope she knows what a dickhead you think she is. "Have the year you deserve."

It's three minutes to midnight, and Jeongguk's watching on with a knot in his stomach as you walk away from a conversation that neither you, nor Hayun, look pleased to have had.

She's glaring as you disappear into the crowd, disgruntled by whatever you had to say. He remembers how Hayun works; how she'll say something catty but won't ever see a fight through. Always resorts to silent treatment.

He knows you got the last word in, but knows that it would have happened regardless of Hayun's bickering style - because that's your style.

Though it feels like time has ceased to exist, the clock on the big screen still counts down. Before he realises it, it's two minutes to midnight. Hayun is smiling now, joking with Nabi, or Tae. He isn't quite sure who. Danbi and Hoseok are with everyone else, too, but you still haven't emerged.

It's at this point Jeongguk resigns himself to the fact that your rules are being broken tonight.

He doesn't like the way it makes him feel; all jittery and skittish. He wants to know where you are. Wants you to be safe. Doesn't want you making bad decisions you can't take back. Wants you with people who care about you as the clock strikes twelve.

Scanning the crowd, he debates going in to find you.

But then, all rather sombrely, as the clock ticks closer and closer to the ever-imposing New Year, he spots you. Knows exactly where you're heading. You're walking in his direction, but not towards him. If his guesses are right, you'll walk straight past him.

And you do.

He knows you well.

You deliberately avoid his gaze as you walk on by. You don't want him following. He's got a New Year to celebrate. People he loves to celebrate it with.

So do you - but it's been such a shit show of a year that maybe it'd be cathartic to say goodbye to it alone, before you're able to welcome a new year in with others.

Or maybe you're just a little too drunk and emotional to be around someone who makes you feel real fuckin' shitty.

There's a minute left.

Hayun keeps glancing over to the bar. Jimin's got his phone to his ear, and Jeongguk's phone is vibrating in his pocket.

Follow you, or find his friends.

It's a head or heart decision.

Trouble is, he doesn't know which is which, anymore.

AO3 | MASTERLIST | MINORS DNI

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lemotmo · 1 month ago

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Heyya!!Let me start by saying i am pretty sure buddie's happening this season butt..

Eddie's obvious chrush on ana.It was on his face.

Eddie's intimate scene with marisol.like him kissing her hands showed he liked her.

What I'm trying to say that we can explain these scene's didn't hold that much depth with theories right but the GA doesn't pay that much attention to minute details of eddie's queer coding.

And I will not speak about eddie being in love with shannon or not because we don't know about that.Eddie's pov/memory of his and Shannon's relationship is messed up.What we were shown on screen when she was alive doesn't clarify anything about his feelings when they were together before chris.He loved her that's for sure but in what form is...unknown,if i may.

So coming back to main point,The GA definitely hasn't given that much thought to eddie's sexuality,probabaly assume he is straight.My question is how do you think the writers will make the GA aware of his queer coding and all the umm..inner function-lol-that we as hardcore fans have studied intrinsically.😅

PS: Sorry to anyone who headcanons eddie as bisexual but I don't think so.

Interesting question Nonny. Thanks!

The thing is...

The GA thought Buck was as straight as a ruler as well before he came out in season 7. He had had a long string of girlfriends. More than Eddie even. So, it wouldn't be the first time the GA would have to adapt to exploring a formerly unknown facet of a character.

Eddie has always been queer-coded, since day one. In my personal opinion even more than Buck ever was and most of the GA seemed to adapt just fine to him kissing a guy, so I'm quite certain it won't be as big an issue as some people seem to think it might be, if it is properly introduced.

I do have to disagree on Ana and Marisol. Eddie never really seemed completely comfortable with either of them. He got a panic attack because Ana was referred to as Chris' mother. He obviously didn't care too much about Marisol either if he didn't even give her a second thought when he met Kim.

He also admitted to Buck that he didn't want to go home because Marisol would want to have sex with him. I mean, she was a good-looking woman and he was avoiding having sex with her over something that happened in her past? That's a red flag right there. The whole moving in/moving out thing? Big red flag! The man didn't really want her in his space, but he felt that he had to take that step because that's what was expected of him. That's not a sign of a loving relationship.

And what about his comment about 'feeling like he has to perform on dates with women'? Or his date with that lovely lady where he sat with her all night long, making plans on how to lie to their families. She was great. That would have been a perfect time for Eddie to fall for someone, but once again he just didn't seem to be very interested.

He seems to be capable of building great friendships with women, but the moment it goes beyond that, things start short-circuiting his brain.

Remember his break up with Ana? He literally said that he thought he would start to fall for her over time, but it never happened for him.

When Carla told him to follow his own heart, he looked over at Ana and you could see he wasn't really in it. He never was.

As for Shannon... He met her at a very young age and befriended her. I'm sure he felt a lot of emotions for her and he definitely crushed on her. But when she got pregnant reality set in and they had to get married. So there was never a chance to explore his own emotions beyond what he and Shannon had. He had no way to compare if this was what he was supposed to feel for someone when you're in love.

So yeah, he did love Shannon deeply. I'm absolutely certain of that. But I'm not so sure if it was a true romantic love. He definitely convinced himself that it was. But was it really?

In conclusion: In my humble opinion Eddie has always had problems connecting to women. He has never really fallen in love with one. Not the way he was supposed to anyway.

I do think they'll gradually build up his story as to not drop the GA right into another coming-out without any other context to it. Two seasons in a row might be too much of a good thing.

They might reach back to all the above scenes I mentioned in flashbacks. And they might ad extra scenes as well. Scenes from when he was a child perhaps? Growing up in Texas and having to be 'the man' of the house at an early age? How did that affect him during his puberty?

Gradually the GA will get a new view on Eddie and his complicated history with women. Eventually, after a few extra episodes I think, they will also get a new view on his very complicated emotions for his best friend Buck.

#eddie diaz meta #eddie diaz #buddie #eddie diaz speculation #season 8 speculation #911 speculation #911 abc #nonnies galore

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munsooooon · 9 months ago

Text

when you know, you know.

rated g | 2, 086 words | tags: Additional Tags: Eddie Munson Takes Care of Steve Harrington, Pet Names, Gay Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Friends to Lovers.

Note: I apologize for any mistake, english is my second language. this is my first Steddie fanfic published and my first fanfic in english. I hope you enjoy it, let me know if there any mistake...

🌟🌟🌟

Steve was happy to have someone to help him with the day to day tasks, he had always been independent (although there was no other option for him really) and he enjoyed being that person who was always there for his friends and who helped them with their day to day life, it made him really happy and made him feel useful. Of course Robin helped him a lot too, but for some reason, when he called Eddie for help it was different, it felt different and sent shivers down his spine.

"Hello?"

"Hello Eds." Steve whispered, doing things as simple as calling him on the phone felt truly intimate. Steve could swear Eddie was smiling.

‘’Stevie! To what do I owe the pleasure of hearing your voice so early, my highness?’’

Steve smiled at the nickname, he hated being remembered as King Steve, but he loved when Eddie called him that, because he loved when he said "my." He got as close as he could to the clock on the wall so he could see the time....

‘’Eds, it's 1:00 PM’’

‘’See? I told you I got up early, actually I should sleep until 3, it's my rest day.’’ Eddie smiled.

‘’Now that you remember it, it makes me feel terrible because I was going to ask you a favor.’’

‘’And I will tell you: Of course, Stevie.’’

‘’No, Eddie, it's…’’

"Ah ah ah," Eddie interrupted, "don't try to convince me because you won't succeed. What can I do for you, darling?"

‘’Eddie, but…’’

‘’Honey, I want to take care of you, what do you need?’’ Eddie responded softly.

“Thanks Eds,” Steve whispered with a slight, “Can you pick up my migraine medication? The pharmacy closes at 5 and my shift ends at 7, I forgot that I had to go get them, the prescription is…‘’

‘’In the refrigerator.’’

Steve smiled without being able to stop.

‘’Yes, there is also money in the next drawer, please Eddie, take it.’’

‘’Okay.’’

"I'm being serious, Munson."

‘’I don't know where that drawer is.’’

‘’Eddie, if you don't take it, I'lI feel terrible. ‘’

‘’Have a nice day, pretty boy.’’

Eddie didn't even give Steve time to respond, he immediately ended the call. Either way, Steve barely managed to put the phone down, because his brain short-circuited upon hearing the older man's words.

---

‘’Eddie’’

"Don't insist, Stevie," Eddie exclaimed, "I'm a gentleman and I won't take the money."

Eddie smiled triumphantly as he saw that Steve finally gave up, he gave him a loving pat on his arm and sat on the kitchen floor of his house, Eddie sat next to him. They had spent about 15 minutes arguing with a smile on their faces for money. Although Steve felt genuinely bad for making Eddie spend money, he also felt happy to have someone who would immediately agree to go get his medicine without expecting anything in return.

In moments like this, Steve feels as if he and Eddie are building their own world that only the two of them can inhabit, together. Steve feels loved and it has taken him a little time to process that feeling, but for the first time in his life he is certain that love exists. Eddie seems to understand that Steve is not used to this, but he has allowed him to go at his own pace, and has given him a safe space to find himself, to feel what is happening between them.

It is worth mentioning that Steve went into complete panic when he realized that friendship with Eddie was not just friendship, curiously and considering the person he had been just three years ago, it did not scare him so much to know that he was falling in love with a boy, he was actually scared of not knowing what to do about it, it was the first time he felt genuinely loved. No move he had used in the past for his conquests seemed good enough. Steve found at age 20 that he had no idea what to do when you were truly in love, he had adored Nancy romantically and knew that Nancy adored him and was attracted to him, many people were attracted to him but had never received what Eddie gave him, they didn't talk about it but Steve was certain that they belonged to each other, and although he didn't know exactly what to say, he knew that the time to talk about it was getting closer and closer.

Meanwhile he can only say...

‘’Thank you’’

For accepting me, for loving me, for waiting for me.

“It's a pleasure” Eddie says with genuine sincerity, taking Steve's hand in his and placing a small kiss.

Eddie's ideal response made him smile, Steve was obviously thanking him for picking up his medications but also for being patient with him. Steve rested his head on Eddie's shoulder, who smiled when he felt it.

"By the way," Steve whispered without breaking away, "I have something for you."

“Mm huh?” Eddie exclaimed, looking straight into his eyes, they were so close. Steve could see how his eyes shined just for him, it physically hurt him to have to separate from him when he had those beautiful eyes fixed completely on him.

"Yes" Steve whispered, lost in his eyes.

“What do you have for me, darling?” Eddie whispered as he hugged him.

Steve smiled as if he were hiding a mischief, got up and took Eddie's hand to walk together to the refrigerator, Eddie rested his back on the kitchen counter, his little eyes reflected the curiosity he was feeling, Steve opened the refrigerator, pulling out the surprise...

“Ice cream?” Eddie asked.

‘’Do you remember the vanilla ice cream you bought on Saturday when we went to breakfast?’’

“The best ice cream in the universe?” Eddie asked excitedly, Steve nodded “God, I loved that ice cream”

"Well, I bought you this bottle..." Steve answered, Eddie looked at him very excitedly, "and maybe three others that are in the refrigerator."

Eddie looked at him with wide, surprised eyes.

‘’But the waitress didn't want to tell me the name!’’

"Yesterday I came back alone, she even told me where to buy it," Steve smiled. "No one can resist my charm!"

"Surely not, dear." Eddie said with a huge smile. “You flirted and tricked a girl just so I could have my ice cream?”

“It sounds awful when you say it like that“ Steve exclaimed “Besides, you loved the ice cream”

Eddie let out a genuine, happy laugh, filled with pure adoration, and picked up Steve who immediately wrapped his arms around his neck for support.

‘’What did you say to her?’’ Eddie said.challenging him, looking into his eyes with a smile, Steve felt his cheeks heat up.

‘’Hi, I'm Steve!’’ Steve said, faking his own voice. ‘’Oh! I was just looking for you, by the way, your hair looks very nice like that’’

‘’Oh yeah?’’ Eddie exclaimed, raising an eyebrow, taking Steve’s words as if they were meant for him.

"Mmm huh," said Steve, "last Saturday I came with my best friend, he loved the vanilla ice cream, Oh! don't worry babe. I understand that you couldn't tell him because it's a company secret but maybe you could tell me, his birthday is on Tuesday and I would like to serve it at his birthday party. I don't want to cause you problems but oh, I would love to be a Good boy for my man, my best friend.

Steve was exaggerating his performance but Eddie was completely lost, he couldn't help his eyes drifting to the other boy's lips when he emphasized being a good boy .

‘’And she gave it to you so easily?’’ Eddie smiled.

‘’Of course, nothing moves more than a boy being sweet for his best friend. ’’ He smiled proudly.

"Sure, you're a great friend, my best homie."

Steve laughed outrageously, Eddie imitated him and lowered him to the floor. Steve scooped up some ice cream and gave it to Eddie to try, who gushed about his love for ice cream. Steve's mouth watered, his lips were open, the sounds Eddie made flooded his entire body and brain.

"God, Steve! You're truly the best, I don't deserve you, you got ice cream just because I mentioned that I loved it," he exclaimed with emotion, "thank you so much, baby."

Steve smiled with a sweet blush on his cheeks, he took care of continuing to feed them both with the ice cream, they shared a spoon and from time to time Eddie smeared ice cream on his face, the tension in the air was evident, the two of them were so deep into the space of the other. The metalhead looked destroyed and proud every time he saw the delicious, white ice cream on Steve's face, it seemed that he was engraving that image of Steve deep inside his mind. Steve could tell Eddie was holding back from doing something else, and Steve wanted that badly, he wanted Eddie to lick every bit of ice cream off his face, but, instead he just smiled at him with complicity, shyness and a blush on his cheeks.

They eventually ended up back on the floor sharing the ice cream and a spoon.

"I've been meaning to ask for a while,” Eddie exclaimed. Steve looked at him. “What does the “J” mean?"

Steve looked at him confused.

"In your prescription, it said Steve J. Harrington."

"Oh, that's my name," Steve answered, concentrating on the ice cream. "Steven Joseph Harrington."

Steve stopped eating when he felt Eddie staring at him with genuine surprise, it seemed like he was even having a hard time breathing. He was always so expressive, especially with his eyes but at that moment he was surprised like he rarely was.

"Are you kidding?" Eddie asked, almost holding his breath.

"No," Steve responded with visible confusion and some anxiety.

"Stevie"

Eddie took him by the face and covered his cheeks, his forehead and his nose with small sweet and noisy kisses.Steve dropped the spoon and without being able to stop himself he began to laugh softly. It was the first time Eddie had kissed him so many times and with so much enthusiasm.

"What's wrong, Eds?"

"Happens that I love you and that we were fucking destined, God." Eddie exclaimed with emotion, Steve looked at him surprised, that was a confession, it was the first time he had said those words to him "And It's my name too"

Steve still hadn't processed that Eddie had told him ‘’I love you’’ for the first time, casually in his kitchen while eating ice cream, and now he had to process that he shared his name with the boy he loved.

"What?" Steve exclaimed, surprised.

"I swear on my guitar," said Eddie, "Edward Joseph Munson, I never thought it rhymed, nice to meet you."

Steve laughed hysterically.

"Steven Joseph Harrington, mine doesn't rhyme either." Steve responded, "the pleasure is mine."

Eddie took his hand ‘’What are the possibilities? I mean, we're only children from marriages that probably never loved each other, we have matching scars and matching names!’’

Before he could think about it too much, Steve kissed him. Their teeth clashed a little because it had been unexpected, but Eddie quickly knew how to keep up, Steve was sure that kissing him was the best decision he had ever made, he felt like all the pieces finally fit together, he was feeling like he was breathing properly for the first time in his life, which was ironic because Eddie was stealing all his air, Steve wanted to take everything that was within his reach, with his hands he ran over the other boy's face and hair, at times he traveled to his back and to his waist. After a few seconds he was sitting on the lap of the other boy who received him and held him firmly.

Steve Harrington had never felt so powerful before, kissing a boy felt powerful.

"I love you too, by the way," Steve smiled close to his lips, looking into his eyes. "Thank you for waiting for me."

"Always."

Steve smiled because he felt free and light, loving Eddie felt easy like eat vanilla ice cream. He couldn't believe that the right moment had arrived when he least expected it, he was simply certain at that moment that when you are with the love of your life, you know it.

#steddie #steddie fanfic #eddie munson #steve harrington #steve harrington x eddie munson #eddie munson x steve harrington

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bonny-kookoo · 2 years ago

Text

Yoongi: 𝐑𝐞𝐝 𝐇𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐬 (1) 🔞

In which everything he always wanted has already been there from the start. He just needs to make that final step.

Tags/Warnings: Vampire!Yoongi, Human!Reader, mentions of 'being high' (drug usage in a way), friends to lovers, blood (duh), red haired Yoongi, Listen I am Jungkook focused but I will put Vampire Yoongi on the menu and you'll better finish your plate

Additional Chapter Warnings: blood high= a rush vampires get after consuming blood, nothing graphic though, wet dream, reader is kinda innocent ngl, sexual tension, fluff

Length: short/mid

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He doesn't know how he got into this situation, memories fizzy and unclear. But what he does know is that he's desperate.

You're squirming underneath his hands, skin a blur, but he somehow still feels it warm and soft. Maybe you're simply so beautiful his mind can't comprehend it- Brain short-circuiting at the sight of your bare body beneath his own. He's hard, dripping with precum already, embarrassingly so- desperate.

But he can't seem to push himself inside.

He's rather opting to rub his painfully hard length over your soft stomach, needy for friction as he gasps out your name under his breath. You're begging for him to do something, anything, and he wants to comply, hell, he wants to ram himself so deep into your cunt until the only thought left in your head is him, him, him.

But he can't.

"Yoongi.." you call out to him, and he wants to answer, what's to move, but nothing is helping. He's caught in the moment as if hands are holding him hostage. He wants to make love to you, fuck you stupid, something in between or both at once- but there's no control over his body present. "Yoongi.!" You say again, more urgently, and he almost sobs to himself because what is happening?

"Yoongi!"

His eyes open, and the first thing he notices is how sweaty he is, heart pounding in his chest. "Thank God you woke up, I was worried." You tell him, sitting on the floor in front of the couch he's been napping on, hands on his shoulder. "Did you have a nightmare?" You wonder, and at that he swallows, eagerly getting into a sitting position with the blanket thankfully covering his still throbbing length.

"Yeah, something like that."

You're currently living with him while your apartment is being renovated- a broken gas pipe having almost hospitalized you a week prior. It had freaked him out to the core, a new fear unlocked it seems as he feels uneasy even considering you moving back into your place.

What if they don't fix it properly? What if you go to sleep and never wake up? What if it breaks again?

"I just wanted to tell you I'll be grocery shopping now." You say, getting up to walk towards the front door, slipping into your boots. "Do you need anything?"

"No." He shakes his head. "You can take my card- it's in my wallet." He tells you, running a hand through his hair.

"No, it's fine!" You smile, zipping up your jacket. "Take it as a thank you for your hospitality." You grin, before you open the door. "I'll be back soon!" You call out, before the door closes.

And he waits.

He watches the small clockwork of his wristwatch count the seconds, one round, then another, then another.

"Fuck it." He scoffs to himself, getting up to walk into the bathroom. A cold shower won't help him, granted, he doesn't want one either. He thought living with you would be easy- you're low-maintenance, never complain, you eat almost everything, you're quiet and you work most of the day anyway.

But fuck. He did not take into account how oblivious you are.

From your shorts to wearing sports bras as acceptable tops around the house, you're seriously making his life hell on earth. It's been a week, and he's already almost ran into you half naked- bare back and glimpse of the side of your chest still clear as day in his memories. He's found your panties shamelessly thrown into the hamper with his own clothes, one pair clearly stained with clear and still glistening arousal yesterday- and he blames today's dream on that.

He wonders what had gotten you to the point of ruining your underwear like that.

As he steps into the shower, he likes to believe that it was him, yesterday when you were cooking together. He'd stood behind you, had helped you cut some vegetables with his hands over yours, looking over your shoulder. Maybe you liked how domestic it was? Maybe you were having thoughts about being bent over the kitchen counter, just like the idea is spreading into his mind right now?

Or maybe it was when you were sitting on the couch together, watching some random movie because the wifi had died, leaving you with nothing but cable TV. Thinking about it, he really could've just slipped his hands underneath your shirt. He'd seen your nipples through the soft fabric, all perked up, proving your lack of underwear.

Maybe if he had made his move yesterday he wouldn't be standing in the shower right now, one arm against the wall while the other desperately strokes his cock.

He shouldn't be doing this.

It feels awfully wrong to think about you during such a thing, and yet, he can't get himself to really stop it until he actually finishes, cum getting washed down the drain together with all of the emotions clouding his better judgement. He knows this isn't right. He needs to do something about it.

But you're so sweet- how can he know that you won't say yes to him just because you don't want to hurt his feelings?

When you return back from getting groceries, you're painfully oblivious to anything being out of the ordinary. You don't question why he showered, you don't ask if anything is wrong- you simply start cooking, before you sing quietly to yourself, swaying on the spot. "Ah, Yoongi!" You suddenly say turning around towards him. "I know what I want for my birthday now!" You say, and he raises his eyebrow.

"Your birthday was four weeks ago." He comments, and you nod.

"And you said I can have whatever I want once I figured it out!" You remind him, his exact words being exactly those. You'd struggled to tell him what he could give you as a present- and so he'd given you nothing but a promise.

"What is it then?" He wonders, hoping it might be something silly like a kiss.

"I wanna go on a trip with you!" You chirp, and he's confused. "A camping trip! You say you like those too, so I wanna go on one with you." You explain, turning around to stir what's in the pot. "Doesn't have to be now, or tomorrow- I just wanna. You know. Spend time with you.." you mumble the last past, not sparing him a glance.

And maybe that's his sign.

The only way to be sure is to wait if you reach out to him first. It's the only solution to this problem there is. And maybe, just maybe, you're holding out your hand right now for him to potentially grab onto.

"Alright, let's do it then." He nods, and you turn with bright eyes and an excited smile.

"Oh, thank you! When do you think we could go?" You ask him innocently enough, tilting your head to the side. He's seen that look on your face so many times by now, and it's still dangerous.

So Yoongi smiles a little mischievously.

"When's the earliest you can get time off of work?"

#bts imagine #bts fanfic #bts fic #vampire yoongi #yoongi fluff #yoongi smut #min yoongi imagines #yoongi imagines #yoongi imagine

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nocturnalazura · 2 years ago

Text

Did You Know We're In Love? (We Are? We are.)

Todoroki X FemReader

Warnings: Fluff. That's it.

Summary: You and Shoto attend your cousin's wedding and everyone else seems to know something you two don't. WC: 2.2K

“Your cousin’s wedding is on the 15th. Please don’t forget or be late.” Your mom sighs, giving you a serious look.

“Mother, I am in fact a grown up and can get myself places on time.”

“I’m just making sure, you almost missed your grandparent's anniversary party last year.”

“That was one time!”

“And I’d rather not have a repeat of that one time.”

“Fine, I will make sure I put reminders on my phone, computer, and calendar.”

“Good, also tell Shoto. He tends to be just a touch more responsible than you when it comes to things like this. Oh, I put you both down for the chicken. I hope that’s ok. Your aunt told me about the fish dish your cousin picked, and it sounds horrendous.” Your mom looks off to the side, talking to someone out of view of her camera. “Your father’s home I have to go. We can’t wait to see the two of you. Send Shoto my love.”

Before you can question her on how she knew you were bringing Shoto before you had even asked if you had been given a plus one, she hangs up. Maybe you should have figured you had been given a plus one, and maybe you should have known your mom already knew you’d be dragging your best friend along with you. The two of you had always been inseparable, she more than likely just put two and two together. Your cousin probably thought you’d bring him as well, since the last few times she’d seen you he’d been right there with you.

“You look like your brain’s going to short circuit.” Comes Shoto’s smooth voice.

You jump slightly as he speaks and turn to find him fresh out of the shower. “My mother thinks I’m not capable of showing up to Mayumi’s wedding on time.”

“She would be correct.” He snorts as he walks into his bedroom, leaving you to trace over the defined muscles of his back.

“She would not be!” You huff and pull your knees to your chest. “You’re having the chicken by the way.”

“And who said I was going?”

“I did, and my mom, apparently. She picked out a meal and put you as my plus one before I even asked either of you.”

“Wow, you both are just making plans without asking me? What if I work that day?”

“You don’t. It’s the 15th of next month.”

“Still you made plans without asking.”

“We both know you’re going so don’t fight it. Plus there’s an open bar if that helps.”

“It doesn’t help. But you’re right, I will go with you. Can’t leave you alone with your family for too long. Especially when your mom likes me more than you.”

“I hate that she likes you more.”

“Well someone has to like me more.” He falls onto the couch next to you.

“I feel like most people like you more. It’s the quiet thing.”

“I’m not that quiet.”

“Around other people you are. And the fact that you’re a little dense sometimes is rather endearing to some people.”

“I am not dense.”

“Shoto, my best friend of many years, you are extremely dense.”

“Ok, maybe I’m a little dense sometimes, but I used to be a lot worse when we were younger.”

“I can agree to that. You have a suit right?”

“Do I have a suit? Do I, the heir to the Todoroki corporation, have a suit?” He says, amusement coating his face.

“Ok, stupid question.”

A few weeks later you’re curled up in Shoto’s passenger seat as he drives to the hotel the wedding will be held at. You fix the bow on the almost annoyingly expensive blender you picked out from the registry and hum along to whatever radio station he picked. He looks over and smiles as you adjust the bow one last time.

“I can feel you staring at me.” You sing.

“The bow looks fine.”

“I know it does. That’s why I fixed it one last time.”

Shoto rolls his eyes as he turns into the hotel parking lot and parks. He gives you a ready for this look and turns the car off. Giving you an awkward smile, he gets out of the car and grabs the bags leaving you to carry the present. Holding the present close, you follow behind him, grimacing slightly when you walk in and run into your mom almost immediately.

“Y/n! Shoto! Good you two got here early.” She happily pulls Shoto into a hug before moving onto you. “Oh and he’s so sweet carrying your bags.”

“I made sure we left earlier than she planned.” Shoto says with a small smile.

“He always carries the bags, he thinks I’ll drop them.”

“You will drop them, we had to go back to the store and buy more eggs last week because you accidentally dropped that bag.”

“One time! That was one time!”

“It was one time for the eggs, you’ve dropped other groceries.”

“You two are so sweet, anyway just tell the front desk you’re here for the wedding, and they’ll get you your key and everything. Dinner's at 6.”

You give your mom an odd look before heading towards the front desk. The receptionist hands over the keys to your room and gives you a bright smile. Offering your own smile you take the keys and head up to the room. Unlocking the door, you happily push it open and walk in, only to pause when you step inside. You look around and turn to look at Shoto, giving him a confused look.

“There’s only one bed.” You state.

“I can see that. Should we ask for a different room, or maybe a cot or something?”

“We fall asleep together on the couch all the time, as long as you stay on your side I don’t care if we share.”

“As long as I stay on my side? That’s rich coming from the one constantly trying to use me as a personal heater.” He teases as he drops the bags off to the side and falls back onto the bed.

Laughing, you collapse onto the bed next to him. “I can’t help it, you're always so warm.”

“It runs in the family.”

“It’s a nice trait.”

“I suppose.”

Turning on your side, you offer Shoto a smile and poke his cheek. “I think it’s great.”

Shoto lets his head fall to the side to give you a soft smile. The two of you stay like that, just enjoying one another's company before the rehearsal dinner rolls around. Over the course of dinner, the two of you find it incredibly odd as your family practically fawns over Shoto and everything about him. Aunts and uncles going on about how happy they are to finally meet him, your grandparents hugging him and telling him how happy they are to see him. It all just feels so odd. Even family members that have met him multiple times seem oddly obsessed with him at the moment.

“Is it me or has my family gone insane?” You laugh as you follow Shoto back to your room.

“Definitely not you. I think your grandma is in love with me. Did you see how many times she hugged me?”

“Oh yeah, it was like she was attached to you. I wonder why they all suddenly love you.”

Shoto collapses back onto the bed and laughs. “They’ve finally realized out of the two of us that I’m the more likable one?”

“Wow, rude. You hardly even talk half the time. I’m pretty much the only person you speak to regularly.”

“You’re my best friend, of course I speak to you regularly.”

“And you’re my best friend. Now enough of this. I am exhausted from all the weird interactions today. I’m showering and going to bed.”

“Sounds good to me. I’ll shower in the morning, I’m tired.”

Nodding, you disappear into the bathroom to shower quickly and get ready for bed. Pulling on a pair of soft sleep shorts and oversized shirt you make your way back out to the bedroom to find Shoto already ready for bed. Giving him a smile, you make your way over and climb onto the bed with a groan. Shoto turns to look at you with a small, tired smile. Returning his smile, you curl up under the blankets and fall asleep.

Morning light creeps in through the cracks in the curtains, slowly lighting the room around you and waking you from a rather peaceful sleep. Lifting your head, you look around confused, only to find yourself curled into Shoto’s side. Feeling you move around Shoto, slowly opens his eyes and looks around before looking over at you and smiling. You match his smile and rest your head back on his chest, enjoying the steady sound of his heartbeat.

“Morning, told you are the one that never stays on your side.” He grumbles as he stretches out.

“Actually you’re now in the middle of the bed, so it’s you.” You tease as you push yourself away from him and get up.

He sits up and gives you a smile before laughing. “Fine, maybe it’s me. I’m going to take a shower. We have to go soon, right?”

“Sounds good. Yeah, we have a bit. I’m going to start getting ready while you do that.”

Shoto nods and disappears into the bathroom to shower while you work on getting ready. As you work on your hair, Shoto steps out of the bathroom, towel wrapped around his waist. You watch him move around behind you before refocusing on yourself as he starts to get dressed.

Hours later the two of you are seated at a table in the reception hall. Family buzzes around, congratulating the newlyweds and catching up with everyone else. You and Shoto happily chat and laugh with your cousins at your table as dinner is served. As you chat one of your cousins nudges you, eyebrows raised as she looks over Shoto. Sighing, you give a nod already knowing that she wants to know if he’s single. A moment later Shoto excuses himself from the table to head to the bar and suddenly your cousins are swarming you, firing questions off as fast as they can manage.

“Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

“How long has it been?”

“Are you going to get married?”

“What’s the story?”

Your head snaps between them as they continue firing more and more questions off until you finally snap. “Stop!” You whisper yell, trying not to steal any attention from the bride and groom. “What are you guys talking about?”

“What do you mean what are we talking about? You and Shoto. When did you get together? How’d he ask you out? How long has it been?” One cousin finally clarifies, leaving you even more confused.

“Shoto and I? Wait, what?”

“Oh come on, we see the way you two look at each other. Just tell us the story already.”

The way we look at each other? The sentence echoes in your mind for a moment as suddenly the way your family has been acting makes sense. Suddenly your mom telling you to bring him makes sense. They all thought you two were a couple. They all thought you had been a couple for a while now it seems. It would be a lie to say you had never thought about him that way. He always felt like a little more than a friend, something more was always there, but you always assumed it was only on your side. You just assumed it was always only you, but now, now it’s the way the two of you look at each other. Could he? Does he look at you as more than a friend?

Ignoring any further questions you stand and look around for Shoto. Spotting him at the bar, you quickly make your way to him and grab his arm. “Shoto.”

“Hey, woah, what’s wrong?”

“Did you know that we’re in love?”

“We’re, wait what?”

“Apparently we are in love.”

He stares at you for a moment before taking a sip of his scotch. “So uh, is this you telling me you’re in love with me or?”

“They think we’re in love. My family. They said they could tell by the way we look at each other.” He stares blankly at you for a moment before taking another sip of his drink.

“So, we’re in love?”

“I. . . I think we are?”

Shoto nods as he thinks. “We are.”

“You sound so sure.”

“I am sure. I am very sure I know how I feel about you. It’s always been there.”

You step closer to him, a soft smile on your face. “It’s always been there. So We’re in love.”

“We are.” He whispers before leaning down to kiss you softly.

The warm feeling of butterflies swirls around inside of you as you hum into the kiss. For the first time in so long everything feels oddly complete.

“So now what do we do now?”

“Now we tell everyone we’re in love and have been for a while. We can keep the whole story just for us.”

“Works for me. Now I want to go show my boyfriend off.” Intertwining your hand with his you lead him back to the table, ready to tell everyone that you are very much in love.

#todoroki x reader #todoroki x you #mha todoroki #bnha todoroki #mha x reader #bnha x reader

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abbygladwell · 10 months ago

Text

"are you wearing my hoodie?" ✈︎ magnus

synopsis: magnus's crew are laying low near your place, giving your boyfriend a chance to spend some time with you.

warnings: kissing, light making out

author's note: i watched this movie and immediately needed fanfics. i found exactly one so im doing it myself now! @agustdowney @spineless-spino tagging because i saw you both asking for magnus fics <3

waking up without your boyfriend by your side had already disoriented you a bit—though not quite enough to draw you out of the warm covers at 6am after staying up a majority of the previous night—but what finally pushes you out of bed is the growing loudness of the cacophony of noises down the hallway, and a sudden bout of cheers.

you groan as the cold air hits your previously comfortably cushioned skin, and through squinted eyes you throw on the nearest—and warmest—article of clothing your hands find, and shuffle out the bedroom door.

the lights in the hallway are off, granting you a moment in the dim illumination to adjust your eyes to the day—and you make your way through to where you can see the lights down the hall are on.

you reach the small living room of your apartment, and are met with the sit of magnus kneeling in front of a box on the small coffee table surrounded by the odd discarded boardgame piece, loose papers, and some sort of mechanical piece you don't recognise—being held up victoriously.

you try to mumble out something between a 'good morning' and 'what are you doing?' from the doorway, but you're pretty sure all that comes out is a drowsy grumble.

either way, magnus jumps up quickly, spinning around to show you his wide grin—that seems to grow impossibly bright along with his eyes when they lay on you.

he calls out your name with an excited gesture to the weird metal thing in his hand, but all you can reply with is a confused frown.

realisation flickers across his face, and he sets the item down on the table in favour of walking towards you with open arms.

"i left it here last time around!"

you nod vaguely understandingly—it's still barely morning, and you're pretty sure he won't take it too personally if with eyes half-open you can't find it in yourself to be too invested in his weird misplaced thingamabob.

magnus's hands find your arms to tug you into a hug like he always does, and you relax into his hold with a smile tucked into his shoulder.

after a moment of rocking back and forth, he pulls away—far too soon, in your opinion—to happily meet your eyes again.

"how are you?" you mumble, drawing out the inevitable (knowing you'll need to get ready for the day soon, and he'll probably have to leave by the time you're done).

his hands find yours, "good," his smile is unwavering as he nods. though—and you're only bold enough to make this assumption because he's told you so directly before—you think he might just be this happy because he's close to you right now.

you finally sigh after another few breaths pass, ready to bid him a pre-emptive goodbye for the foreseeable future, when he beats you to it.

"are you wearing my hoodie?"

the question catches you off guard, and the surprise has your eyes blinking quickly, joined by a small frown.

"oh-?" you glance down, and find you in fact are wearing one of magnus's nondescript grey hoodies—you must have blindly grabbed it when you were tumbling out of bed.

"i guess i am," you mutter bashfully, averting your gaze in the slightest embarrassment—especially at the notion that he might be bothered by you 'stealing' his own clothes.

but then, you suddenly feel the warm tickle of breath fanning gently across your face, and you look up from your feet to see your boyfriend leaning just an inch closer to you.

your mind both fully wakes up then proceeds to short-circuit at the closeness, and with your brain's logical functioning gone, the only thing holding you together—your heart—is now beating like the pitter-patter of rain as you notice the sheer adoring look painted across his features.

"you're wearing my hoodie," he repeats, voice now giddy—and you wonder how with such close-contact he isn't a flustered mess too.

you swallow heavily, and give a miniscule nod, as if a movement any bigger might bring your faces infuriatingly closer.

his grin widens, hands grazing up your arms.

he finally says again, "you are," like he can't believe it.

you're just about ready to break through the haze to make a joke about his repetitiveness, when your words a flung from your tongue to be replaced by a yelp, as his lips fly towards yours.

it's not neat by any means, when magnus's lips catch yours—he's got a smile stuck on his face while your own is also starting to peak through, and he seems far more invested in just holding you as close as possible instead of remembering there's actually a bit more to kissing than just squishing your mouths together.

he's not at all discouraged though, and you feel an arm snake around to the small of your back, while the other finds your cheek to hold you impossibly closer to his lips—that are, however slowly but surely, starting to glide against yours in what's steadily becoming a proper kiss.

his smile softens to your touch, finally letting your lips catch on each other like they usually do, and letting you indulge yourself without the threat of him bursting into giggles at any moment (though the risk is never null).

your body is alight with a warmth sprouting from every place his body meets yours, and it spreads through you; your own hands making contact with the back of his neck and the wrist that holds your own face as the kiss deepens.

you feel the soft vibration of a pleased hum, and your heartbeat quickens ever faster. but then, a sudden cold hand slipped under the fabric of your—well, his—hoodie draws a surprised gasp that parts your lips from his.

it's like he was anticipating your exact reaction, though, as he wastes no time in pecking your lips once more, and then in a flash ducking to the crook of your neck.

this new contact draws another gasp from you—though a decidedly less stunned one—and you instinctively curl further into your boyfriend's hold as he dusts feather-light kisses along exposed skin of your neck.

you're pretty sure he's mumbling something into your skin, but half from the low volume and half from the fog slowly overtaking your mind, his words are completely indiscernible—you hope he's not whispering something that's actually important like he sometimes does when he knows you can't hear him.

the pecks trail up, closer to your ear and nearing your pulse-point. you're trying to keep your focus just enough to figure out what he's saying, when the bubble around the two of you suddenly pops at a sound buzzing through the air.

you frown, but magnus doesn't seem to notice it—or he just doesn't care enough to separate from you, which wouldn't be a first—as his lips reach your jawline, and show no sign of stopping there.

you're just about to let yourself ignore the sound in favour of knowing his lips are about to meet yours again, when the sound doesn't stop.

you internally groan, and lightly tug at the collar of magnus's shirt.

"do you hear that?"

he's reluctant to pull away, and you can see it clearly in the twinkling of his confused eyes when they meet yours that all he wants is to dive back towards you—but now that he's leaned far enough away for your head to start to clear, you recognise the sound.

your head tilts, "i think your phone's ringing."

his slight impatience deepens with a frown when he glances down at his pocket as if looking at it long enough might silence the phone inside.

when it doesn't, and you nod to it—letting him know he should just answer it, and that he won't be getting away with just ignoring it—he finally reaches in.

the recognition in his eyes is unmistakable, as is the slight restlessness that follows as he's swift to decline the call and reach for your hand.

"it's no one," he tries to coax you closer to him again, "where were we?"

but you're not oblivious, and you just light-heartedly cross your arms and raise an eyebrow.

"it was cyrus, wasn't it."

he bites his lip, and is much worse at hiding the obvious than he appears to think he is.

"what? who? of course not!"

you glance at the clock across the living room, and are met with the face showing you a time that your boyfriend would usually have left before by now.

"you should be there already," you don't know the full extent of what he does 100% of the time—you're not entirely in the dark about his less-than-legal endeavours, but it's not like he tells you the entirety of his crew's plans—but you do know in a job like his running late isn't exactly an option.

"kind of," he shrugs and tries to fool you with a smile, "but not really!"

your own endeared smile betrays your assertive demeanour, but you're not letting him win that easy.

"if you stay i'm not kissing you," which honestly isn't entirely true, you'd probably give in eventually, but you're trying to be steadfast and convincing right now.

he thinks about this for a moment, and you think you really should be commended for not falling into the arms of the most perfect man in the world right then and there, when he finally replies, "okay! but i still get to hold your hand."

you hope your eyeroll masks the giddy grin you're biting down as you lightly push at his shoulders towards the front door, and walk to his weird item still sat on the coffee table.

"you're going, now. what would cyrus say if you told him you missed a heist because we were too busy kissing?"

you pass him the item, and he's still looking at you with adoring eyes that try to convince you to let him stay as he says, "he wouldn't mind," but he's dutifully started to make his way to the door.

"uh huh," you smile amusedly, and wave to him once his hand is finally on the doorknob, "see you."

he waves back too, as he steps through the threshold, and just as you're taking a relieved breath—his head ducks back in, and he blows you a kiss with a wink.

"i love you," he grins.

you don't hesitate to call back, "i love you too!" and you don't even try to suppress your adoring smile that stays minutes after he's closed the door behind him.

banner credit @/cafekitsune

#magnus x reader #lift x reader #i have no idea what other tags to use since he doesnt have a lastname and this fandom is nonexistant

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arminsumi · 2 years ago

Note

AOT boys reactions accidentally walking in on you changing?

Oh my! („ಡωಡ„)

A lil' oopsie with the boys

With; Eren, Armin, Levi, Zeke, Reiner, Bertholdt, Jean

Who is too flustered to speak, and who unashamedly checks you out?

Cws; slightly sexual themes, nakedness

Armin

As soon as he lays eyes on your half-naked body, his brain short-circuits. His thoughts are a buzzing mess.

For a second he's too flustered by your half-nakedness to say anything, but he quickly stutters out an innocent apology. Even the pitch of his voice is a little higher, almost squeaky.

His whole face is red, redder than you've ever seen anyone's face, even his ears are burning.

He either shuts his eyes immediately or he looks straight upwards, because he doesn't want to make you uncomfortable.

"Oh my God! I'm so sorry! I didn't know you were- I'm sorry! Um!"

Turns around like he has no idea what to do. Your silhouette is burning bright in his mind, you bet he'll never forget this (and he'll curl up in embarrassment in bed at like 3 AM about it)

Eren

He's not sure what to do?? Like he just stands there, almost observing you. Then something clicks in those deadpan eyes and he apologizes for walking in on you.

"Sorry." He says, you know, in that smooth rumbling voice.

To you he looks unphased after just seeing you practically naked, but trust me his mind is a bounce house of unholy thoughts.

Levi

"Oh, excuse me." He says coolly.

His expression barely changes from its calm resting state, but you do notice how his one brow flicks up curiously for a second.

He just slides right back out of the room, and he's not embarrassed at all. Battles down his unholy thoughts by trying to think of more mundane things, but he'll get distracted and start thinking of your hips.

Zeke

"Hey, Y/n- ah, sorry, is this a bad time?" Zeke laughs a little, and looks away respectfully, which is the most difficult thing he's forced himself to do in his whole life.

He leaves and lets you finish changing, contemplating your body outside your room, and waits to apologize to you.

Reiner

Okay, he's a mess. An absolute, maladroit mess. His brain just can't compute how to handle this situation, so he stands there looking at you for a still moment.

A stutter of surprise escapes his throat, and when you say something, that's when his brain reboots.

"Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to. I'll... let you be." He says, and then leaves.

He's so disoriented after the whole experience that you can see it in his eyes and how he behaves. Blushes a lot when he sees you again!

Bertholdt

Well, lets just say he apologizes even more profusely than Armin. He's so startled that he jumps, kinda like a rabbit in fright.

His apologies are a mess, too. Totally rambles about how sorry he is for invading your privacy.

"I'm sorry! Sorry, I didn't know you were changing, uh- wow... I mean, sorry! I'll go-"

Jean

Yes. Yes he is the one who unashamedly checks you out. He's not flustered or anything, he just smirks and clicks his tongue.

"Well damn! Lookin' good..." He compliments honestly, "Don't mind me."

He just slips out of your room after that, smirking to himself for the rest of the day. Really wishes he could smugly rub it in the other's faces that he saw you half-naked, but refrains from it.

#armin #eren #levi #zeke #reiner #bertholdt #jean #fluff #aot #snk #armin arlert #eren jaeger #zeke jaeger #x reader #x you #aot x you

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theexit392 · 3 months ago

Text

They knew. They knew...

Potty training works. I'm potty trained. Probably completed that phase around 3. By then I knew poop went in the potty and I was able to demonstrate that skill to great praise from my parents.

Also me at 3.

Pooping in my pants and hiding the evidence.

That was the next phase of development. Getting more adept at hiding the evidence. Life is nothing but practice. You do any one thing enough, chances are you'll get better at it. When you're first getting started though, whether you realize it or not....you suck. And if you have the life experience of a 3 year old, you probably really really suck. So, in retrospect, those first few years of having an alternate universe that the potty trained me did not exist in, I was likely not as good as I thought I was at hiding the evidence.

If i remember correctly, I'd just keep stashing the same pair of dirty underwear in the bottom of my hamper thinking Mom would never get to the bottom. I remember them too. Little red briefs. Big boy pants! Ha! Big turd pants was more like it. Every once in a while though. Those things would end up clean and folded in my dresser. I never got in trouble for messed up underpants so I thought she must not have noticed the stains. Young me turds were so well put together though there wasn't a grand crust of residue, even after several uses. I would describe the aftermath as "a shadow of a turd"

unrelated side note: Boy do I miss young innards! My young innards made really good, large, firm poops. I loved those. After 40 some years of working tirelessly day in, day out, they just...don't...work...the same. If you're over 40 then you know what I'm talking about....anyway.

Fast forward a few years. I'm 6 or 7 and find myself in a chair face to face with a psychologist. As I was at 6, I am today. Always willing to sit around and shoot the shit. I was a happy kid. Always bright and outgoing. So while the Doc was prowling around in my brain looking for some darkness, I doubt he could find much. I'm sure he found me open, honest, witty, and for lack of a better term: normal. Then at the end of our conversation he asked. Are you sure there isn't anything else you want to talk about? "No" i said.

"You're sure there is nothing else bothering you?" he probed again.

"No" I said again brightly and definitively.

Any shrink worth the framed diploma hung on his wood paneled office wall could see straight through my happy-go-lucky facade in that moment.

Panic.

Ooooohhh I knew what he's getting at. Shit! Now I know why I'm really here!!! Gaaaaaahhh! I know why my mother scheduled this little, till now innocuous chat! F***! (even my 6 year old head knew that was a bad word)

While my spectacled cherub face smiled sheepishly, my head was in full blown short circuit mode. Manically coming to grips with the notion that my little extra curricular activities may very well have been found out.

He's pooping his pants on purpose. What is wrong with my son?

There must be some reason he's acting out like this? Something he's hiding?

No ma, all I'm hiding is dirty underwear. And believe you me...I'm about to get a lot f****** better at hiding it.

What is kinda nuts to me is that no one ever asked me point blank about it, at any time in my life! Not even the psychologists. Of which there were many up through my teen years. Some would ask the same question "Is there anything else you want to talk about?" when they would arrive at the conclusion of the session with no indication that the pants pooping subject was going to come up in natural (if you can call probing natural) conversation.

My mom would make a comment about the condition about my underpants from time to time but she never directly addressed the issue either. Maybe she didn't want to know the answer? Or maybe she eventually came to understand that her son was a happy kid that enjoyed his life. Loved his music and cars and guitars. Loved his parents and his sister. Loved his friends.

It just so happens he also loved pooping his pants.

Privately.

As I got more skilled at hiding the evidence, handwashing and drying pre-bottom-of-the-hamper toss. I'm sure they all thought maybe I'd outgrown it. That's what kids do. They outgrow their mischief.

Nope. I'm now really really good at doing laundry.

Hope you enjoyed this time in the wayback machine! Off to do some handwashing....

#messy nappy #pants pooping #pantypoop #the life of a pants pooper

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littleladymab · 9 months ago

Text

OC Kiss Week - Rain

So like I knew I was doing the official prompts out of order, but I hadn't realized that I wrote them down out of order on my doc. So anyway, Rain is day one for me!

Requested by @jadeoxfordrose and @citadelofswords! Love and miss these kids :') I don't think this is "what the ghost" verse, but it is the same setting that I alluded to in my SlumberZine piece!

Theo belongs to Jade 💞

+++

The rain is completely unexpected and Davey doesn’t know how to take this change in plans into consideration.

“C’mon,” Theo urges, nudging him with their elbow and then smacking him in the chest with something. “Date’s not over yet.”

Startled, Davey catches whatever it is against his chest and looks down to find an umbrella. “There is no way you planned this,” he says, and Theo’s grin is more than enough to make up for the interruption.

“Nothing catches you off-guard when you’re always prepared,” they tease. “Now are you going to open it up or are we going to keep huddling here?”

They’re under the awning of a hardware store, caught halfway between the cafe they had lunch at and the park with the pop-up exhibit that was supposed to be part two. People hurry past, many caught as unaware as Davey was by the sudden downpour.

Davey obliges, since he’s the taller of the two, and holds it expertly over both of their heads as Theo presses in against his side. “The exhibit isn’t going to be open in this weather.”

“That’s true…” Theo’s voice trails off, and Davey hopes that he isn’t imagining the disappointment in it. “We’ll have to cut the date short then.”

“I suppose it just means that I have to see if you’re free next Thursday and if we’ll be able to catch it before it closes,” Davey chimes with as much enthusiasm he can muster.

“Ah,” Theo says and laughs. “A literal rain check, hmm?”

“They call it that for a reason.”

They laugh again. “Yeah, next Thursday is fine.”

“Good. Good! Alright then. Wow, a second date before the first is even finished—” Davey cuts himself off with his own laugh as Theo playfully shoves his shoulder. “Shall I walk you to the bus stop?”

Theo loops their arm through Davey’s to ensure the umbrella is covering as much of them as possible. “I’d like that.”

His brain short-circuits at the gesture before his expression melts into a probably quite stupid grin. “After you, then.”

It’s not until they’re halfway down the block that Davey’s brain finally does catch up with the situation and he wonders that since he lives nearby, should he have asked Theo to come over? Or would that have been too forward? They’ve known each other for a year now and while this is their first date-date they’ve hung out before but just never at either of their places. It’s always been with the girls or Parker.

Putting the sudden pressure of the invitation back to his place feels like a bit much, even if it does feel a little rude since it is close by.

Once they’re beneath the shelter of the bus stop, Davey shakes out the umbrella and folds it up to hand back to Theo. They take it without comment, still going on about the rude customer that Merril had to deal with earlier in the week.

“I wanted to punch him,” Theo finishes vehemently.

“I’m surprised Merril didn’t,” Davey confesses and they snort.

“It was a near thing.”

Davey opens his mouth, about to ask when is the next time that Theo and Merril are working and maybe he’ll stop by to see them both but secretly it will be a chance to take Theo out after they get off and well maybe he should ask Merril and make it a surprise— But then the bus rolls up to the stop and they have to dance out of the way to avoid the water splashing up onto the curb.

Theo already has their bus pass in hand and has a moment when the other people at the stop file on and off. They look like they’re also about to say something, but in the end, they square their jaw like they’ve made up their mind.

“Text me when you get home,” Davey says for a lack of anything better to say. He shuffles the few paces closer to the bus in time with Theo and the line. “And we’ll plan for next week. Well, after I check the forecast.”

“Make a back-up plan if it does,” Theo says, then just before they can step out from under the awning to board the bus, they whirl around and press a kiss to Davey’s lips and the umbrella into his hands.

Davey’s so startled he’s barely able to catch the umbrella but utterly fails to return the kiss as Theo does the mad dash through the rain into the bus. “Wait,” Davey says, holding out the umbrella.

“Keep it,” Theo laughs as they swipe their pass, hair clinging to their cheeks and their shoulders drenched. “Give it back to me later.”

The last thing Davey sees as the bus driver decides he’s not one of the oncoming passengers and closes the doors in his face, is Theo’s silhouette waving to him.

Davey is still standing there, clutching the umbrella in both hands, chilled to the bone and more wet than not as the wind shifts the rain into every crevice of the stop. But there’s little pinpoints of warmth against his jaw from their fingers, and his lips from theirs.

Finally, a buzz in his pocket jolts him back to his senses, and he checks his watch to see a message from Kari about pizza soon, and Davey pops open the umbrella.

Right, he thinks, giddy in a way he hasn’t been in years. Maybe an invitation back to his place next time wouldn’t be so bad. He can make dinner for them after the exhibit.

Davey spins the handle of the umbrella and heads to the crosswalk, grinning.

#ockiss24 #oc kiss week #a lil miss original #lil miss writings #oh gosh should I tag this as FTL?#follow the leader #ftlcast #don't see why not!

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ugh-yoongi · 2 years ago

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hello, congratulations my beautiful funny grandpa friend on your follower milestone! as discussed, i have a drabble request: namgi, a blowjob, and a happy ending. yours to do with what you will - as explicit or vague as you like and you don't have to use my favorite ao3 tag if u don't want. okie, love u - good job being awesome on tumblr and reminding me it exists

yeah, hi, we're not gonna discuss how long this has been sitting in my ask box. we're gonna pretend that this showed up within the last two days.

flow job

pairing: yoongi x namjoon genre: underground rap scene au, fwb au; pwp warnings: this is obviously gay mxm stuff, so please do not interact if that's not your thing. swearing, public sex, oral sex, unedited. rating: explicit. minors dni. wordcount: 1k listen to: cypher pt.3 by bts

it's bee's birthday! send me yoongi requests and/or fic recs!

There’s something about the way Yoongi raps.

It fucks Namjoon up a little. (A lot.) Has him standing far enough in the side-stage shadows to adjust his jeans. Has his fingers twitching at his sides, wanting nothing more than to reach out and touch, but he has to remember where they are. Who they’re around. Has to remember that this is part of the routine.

Because it’s not the first time.

Won’t be the last, either. Yoongi likes knowing Namjoon’s watching him, that he’s strung tight and a little desperate by the time Yoongi’s done. Likes feeling Namjoon’s heated gaze on him every time he wordplays some filthy line; every time his tongue darts out to swipe over his bottom lip. Likes taking the last slot of the night because it’s always the longest, and god knows Yoongi likes to draw it out, prolong the game.

The beat Yoongi’s rapping along to is dirty. Namjoon can feel the bass in his chest, but Yoongi rides it well. Better than anyone else in this grimy club. Looks better than anyone, too, but it’s the competence that does it for Namjoon. What had him approaching Yoongi to begin with, a little awestruck and inspired and a lot horny, and Yoongi had smirked out of the side of his mouth and that was the end of life as Namjoon had known it. Had him shoved in a disgusting bathroom stall with his pants pulled taut around his thighs, Yoongi on his knees in front of him.

Now it’s a thing.

Only ever here. Only in these seedy underground clubs where they’re known only by their stage names. Kim Namjoon and Min Yoongi only exist here to one another.

Yoongi spits one more line right as the beat cuts out and he drops his microphone on the floor. There’s screaming, thunderous applause, but Namjoon hears none of it. All that exists to him is Yoongi and the way he finds him in the dark immediately, knows all his hiding places, and the hunger evident on his face.

Namjoon is a man that needs little instruction. Smart as hell but just as clumsy, yet always seems to know exactly what to do when it comes to Yoongi. Namjoon might call it intuition if the promise of Yoongi’s wet, hot mouth didn’t have his brain short-circuiting, but, well.

They’ve only played this club once before, but Namjoon has the layout memorized. Knows exactly where to go. Knows all the turns, how many steps. Hasn’t thought of much else since the last time he had Yoongi’s mouth on him. Two weeks, and he’s been fucked up and on fire ever since.

Sometimes Yoongi is gentle and teasing, but tonight he moves like he’s possessed. Slams a stall door open and pushes Namjoon inside of it with little regard for his well-being. No regard for anyone who might play witness to this, either, because he’s back on his knees before Namjoon can blink. Has his belt undone and his jeans pulled down while the crowd is still chanting his stage name.

“Hy-hyung,” Namjoon tries to choke out, but it comes out all breathy and stuttered. Tries to tangle his hands in Yoongi’s hair, too, but he swats his hands away.

“Shut up,” Yoongi replies, and it’s all heat but no disdain. “Fuck, I thought about this the entire time.”

Namjoon’s briefs get tucked beneath his balls and he braces himself for the feel of Yoongi’s mouth—sucks in one breath and then another, steadies himself against the stall door—but there’s… nothing. He cracks one eye open and looks down. Whimpers at the sight of Yoongi there, cheeks flushed, looking at Namjoon the same way Namjoon knows he looks at him.

“Are you gonna…”

It’s all gums when Yoongi smiles. Seems to laugh despite himself. “Suck your dick? Yeah, I’m working on it.”

“Doesn’t seem to be the case, hyung.”

“Give me a fucking second, Namjoon, I’m thinking.”

“Can you think later? My dick hurts and your knees are gonna bruise. Not to mention this club is probably the nastiest one we come to—”

Yoongi scoffs. Spits in his hand and pumps the length of Namjoon’s cock just to shut him up. It works. It really works, because Namjoon’s moaning and thrusting his hips into Yoongi’s hand like no one’s ever touched his dick before. Pathetic. Namjoon knows it is, but he can’t help himself. When just a look from Yoongi can have him unraveling, it’s unrealistic to expect him to be able to withstand this kind of assault.

“I was thinking,” Yoongi continues, replacing his hand with languid, slow licks from the base of Namjoon’s cock to the tip, “about how to—” Sucks hard at the tip just to laugh when Namjoon swears. “—ask you out.”

And because he’s a bastard, Yoongi doesn’t give him a chance to reply. Just swallows the entire length of Namjoon’s cock, and whatever sounds and words come out of Namjoon’s mouth are no longer his responsibility. Whatever he does with his hips isn’t, either, because he’s been keyed up since he first laid eyes on Yoongi hours ago. Has exhibited impressive restraint, so he figures he’s allowed to let go. He’s allowed to fuck Yoongi’s mouth in shallow strokes until he’s snug in his throat.

“Fuck, fuck,” he groans. The chase is mindless, now. Nothing exists beyond the feel of Yoongi’s mouth. “Hy-hyung, fuck, I’m gonna—”

Yoongi pulls off long enough to roll his eyes and say, “Jesus, already?” before Namjoon finally tangles his hands in his hair and feeds his cock back into his mouth. Then it’s just instinct.

Namjoon comes with a long, drawn-out moan. The kind of orgasm that has his legs trembling, no longer able to support his weight, and he wants to sink to the floor and ride it out but he refuses to put his bare ass on the grungy tile. “Oh my god,” he says, swallowing hard to try and catch his breath.

Yoongi is completely unbothered. Stands to dust off his knees. “Am I allowed to think now?”

“Sure,” Namjoon concedes, “but I can’t. I think you sucked me stupid.”

Yoongi scoffs, rolls his eyes again, but Namjoon can see the shy smile that’s threatening to break through. Can see the blush spreading across his cheeks. “You’d think you’d be used to it by now. You wanna go grab a drink with me?”

Namjoon falters. Isn’t sure he’s hearing correctly. Knows, logically, that Yoongi had mentioned it just minutes earlier but thought maybe he’d misheard, like some mirage in the horny desert that’s Namjoon’s brain. Gets distracted by Yoongi’s spit-slicked lips, the way the yellowed, fluorescent lights of the bathroom glint off his mouth, the way he swipes his tongue at the corner, and blurts out:

“Is this why your stage name is Gloss?”

Yoongi’s stunned. Just blinks owlishly. “You really think I’ve made a habit of blowing people in club bathrooms and named myself after it?”

“Well, I don’t know, your mouth just looks—”

“Just shut up, Kim Namjoon,” Yoongi says, and Namjoon decides it’s advice worth taking. “Do you want to go out with me or not? I’m not asking again.”

He nods.

#beeday drabbles #jewel answers #jewel writes #lauren i love u i'm so sorry this took 500 years pls forgive me #yoongi x namjoon #namjoon x yoongi

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here4theheartbreak · 2 years ago

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I'd love to hear more about your experience at the ooo fansign, if you'd like to share. I can't imagine what it would be like to be up close to the boys. I feel I might die from awkwardness, but they look warm and relaxed and your photos are so cute!

Hiiii - I saw this and meant to respond but I've been out all day so I'm just getting a chance to sit down and compile my thoughts about it now. It's a really long post - I have talked to friends about bits of it, but never really sat down and wrote it all out - so I'm putting it under a cut.

Fansign

The fansign - and all the engagements really - were so overwhelming and fun. I've done hi touches before, but this was a whole new level. I was a few rows back hanging out with another Rie stan; she was teasing me bc Junji was at the start of the line and Rie wasn't until the end - I wasn't sure how I was going to face Junji first. I also had gifts to give them, so I had to somehow make my fingers and mouth work. Junji was super sweet, he's got such a nice smile. He's so loud though - I was anticipating him being the quiet, easy one, but no, you could hear him across the venue - he was so happy with everyone. Just shouting "HELLO" - bless him. Nine too - he's so handsome in person, but not like... Intimidatingly so? I was worried about it with him but he was one of the easier members to interact with throughout the night. Kyubin was super easy and nice as well, and then Rie.

I interacted with Rie 4 times that night and every one was embarrassing or overwhelming 🤦🏻‍♂️ - what did I do when I saw Rie for the first time? Made eye contact with him and gasped in his fucking face. I couldn't help it, he was so much more handsome than I anticipated and his gaze is so intense. Apparently I gasped loudly bc his eyes widened a bit and he looked somewhat concerned before smirking and greeting me. I slid his envelope over like a moron and moved on (I think I muttered a hi, thank you? I'm not sure tbh - I blacked out). Then there was Yoojung (who is so pretty oh my god.) But he was very quiet and gentle, but unfortunately he came up right after Rie so I was still reeling through him and Mill.

Afterward we ended up meeting and befriending a lyOn standing in front of us because they overheard a dirty comment my friend made and cracked up so hard they almost fell over 🙈 (you know those moments where it's super loud and you're safe to talk - then as soon as you say the thing it's quiet? That happened. Not "quiet" but our little area of people was just quiet enough for this person to hear us).

Hi-Touch/Photo

Then afterward was the hi-touch and group photo; I was prepared this time. Or so I thought. Junji was fine - he's got massive hands omg. But he's so very gentle, I didn't realize just how nice that was until later in the night. Nine was so happy and grinny and bubbly - his normal hyper self. (Side note, Nine was wearing his crop top and idk how he managed to have both the firmest washboard abs while simultaneously looking like he has the softest tummy - his skin is eerily perfect.). Kyubin was very professional, and unfortunately I don't think I gave him all the attention that I could have, because I knew Rie was coming.

When I reached him I looked anywhere but his eyes - I wasn't going to be stupid. I would say thank you, touch his hand, and that was it. He fucking noticed - I swear to God he did. Maybe it was a coincidence, but I was purposely looking at his mouth/neck when I reached him so I could speak, and he tilted his head just enough to catch my eyes and smirked. Which of course short circuited my brain (moreso when he curled his fingers around my hand for a split second - I know it was only a few seconds but I felt like I held up the line for ages 😂) - I was a stupid grinny fool then with Yoojung, who - imo - looked slightly amused. Either he saw how Rie was affecting me or he was just was in a silly mood idk.

Concert

Then we had the concert - amazing experience overall. Honestly did not last long enough. I won't go into all the specific songs because this is already absolutely monstrously long, so I'll just hit the important parts.

I had a pretty good idea they'd do begin and because based on the previous stops, but I wasn't sure; I was praying for it tho, esp after those first two interactions with Rie. because was the song that ultimately made me give the O's a serious shot. So when they did it, I was so jazzed. because makes me cry, it's such a beautiful song and the choreography they made for it is stunning. (I love all 6 choreos - they are so smart in the way they used the members in couples to add to the effect, and the way they used the choreography to sort of tell the story that they told in the ui videos - it's so impressive.)

So, as pretty much everyone knows, after that was the proposal - I was a sobbing mess and it was beautiful. Honestly - I feel so proud of OOO for creating a space safe enough for this, and I am so happy for the folks that got engaged, what a powerful and amazing moment. Obviously I was just one face in the crowd, but I'm so honored that I got to watch history be made in a way, it's beautiful and humbling. No matter how much progress is made, this particular concert will always be the first that a queer couple not only got engaged at, but had the full support and cheer of the group - I mean - Kyubin excitedly and willingly stopping the concert to do this? What a powerful statement of support. I doubt they'll ever see this, but I wish the couple all the happiness in the world, and I woud love to thank them for letting all of us there share in such a beautiful moment.

Oh, by the way, the progress flag that ultimately made it on stage was actually my friend's flag. The group I ended up getting in with before the concert decided we wanted to sign one. We had him bring it and we all signed it before going into the venue (more than just us - he was having a bunch of people sign - anyone who wanted to in the line - it was so full of signatures of support); and one of our gc members handed it to them, the way I cheered when I saw them grabbing it. I could talk for pages about what OOO's support means for the community and how important it is, but I am sure this is already becoming tedious lol - so I will save that for another day.

Snapshots (Premium)

Junji

So after the concert was over too soon - I got Junji and Rie for premium snapshots. I decided to go to Junji first. When I got up there, the staff was changing the film, but I was scared to approach bc I didn't wanna get yelled at by her. Junji was leaning against the barricade, so we just kind of awkwardly stared into each other's eyes for an uncomfortable amount of time before he did that all caps HELLO bellow he'd been doing all night. Which startled the fuck out of me 😑 -- I asked for a back to back photo, he stood straight up and laughed (I think pointing out our height difference, even with the height boost from my boots I am tiny comparatively). He is massive. Jfc - I've met a lot of tall people, taller than him even, but he seems to just dwarf them all. I didn't really notice his size at the fansign/hi touch as much - probably bc it went so fast.

So we turn and he nearly crushed me bc he dropped his weight on my back. I figured he'd stay standing tall but, just kinda touching, but no, he decided to see just how much my tiny ass could support 🙃 - I had a moment of real fear - I was already weak in the legs from the concert (and standing for the 5 hours prior to said concert), if I went down he was gonna come with me and we'd both end up hurt 🤣 but we stayed standing. I thanked him and rushed off to Rie's line.

Rie

Thus comes embarrassing Rie moment #3 of my night. Once again the lady had to change the film, so the awkward staring ensued. Rie is a lot more forward then Junji tho, so once he realized I wasn't moving voluntarily, he stepped up and motioned for me to join him at the barricade. He asked how I liked the concert and I said he did amazing. I told him I wanted to poke his cheek. We couldn't quite get the hand position right so I hit his hand once or twice lol. After the photo was taken I (looked into his eyes again - that was my mistake) told him he performed because beautifully. He grinned all wide and said "oh thank you!" and touched my hand. I got so shy that I nodded and hurried off - I was nearly running. He grabbed at me and was like “no no no no!” - it was because I ran off without my photo. 🫣 So I had to come back and take it from the staff member and tried to walk away but he called for me again and raised his hand, I figured for a high five, but he squeezed it a second and grinned before letting me slink away in shame.

Snapshots (Standard)

Then I had standard photos - I got one with Kyubin, Nine, Mill, Rie, and Junji. I wanted one with Yoojung but unfortunately his sold out before I could buy it 😩

Nine

I went to Nine first figuring he'd be not so bad, and I was right. He's very easy to be around. I told him he was amazing and he laughed and thanked me, and said I was more amazing. Honestly his interaction was by far the least star-struck that I had and I'm glad for it, it really solidified him as a great, easygoing person for me, and it was really nice to have that. Before I got to him, the person ahead of me spoke Korean, it was really cute bc he wasn't expecting it. He thanked her in English and she spoke back in Korean, his eyes bulged out of his head and he laughed so bright and chatted with her for a few seconds, it was really cute. Prior to the concert I was pretty sure he was my bias wrecker, and I definitely stand by that belief now, there's something just so nice about him. Not in a "comfort person" way but more of like... I don't know how to describe it tbh, he is just so naturally friendly.

Mill & Kyubin

Mill was so sweet and gentle. He pulled me so much closer than I thought he would - I was scared to touch him 😂 but when he tugged me close I was like oh, okay, this is fine. And he held on for a bit after and thanked me for coming, I thanked him and said he did so well. The woman doing his photos (she's known as a problematic person and really not very nice) was rushing a bit - I wish I could've talked with him for a minute more - he was very similar to Nine in the whole just, easy to talk to, normal person, not intimidating way. After I finished with him and was waiting for another member, I saw him interacting with a child fan that came. She was no more than 8 or 9, maybe younger. He was so sweet, it warmed my heart. He was like, fixing her hair and talking gently to her, honestly - kids and animals, THE prime indicator of a person. (Apparently Rie was very sweet to the kids too but I missed seeing that. Good thing, probably, I was already lost for that man).

Kyubin's was hard to read. He wasn't cold or mean, but he's very professional and kind. He is so frickin' tall. I told him he did so well tonight and thanked him for all his hard work, I wanted to say more to him, but my brain was blanking and I was so tired >.< - I know he's a chatty person if you start it, I've heard as much from other lyOns; my friend had a fun story with him. If I have any regrets at all from this concert, it's not finding a way to get a picture with Yoojung, and not chatting for longer with Kyubin and Mill. Next time I see OOO I'm definitely gonna try - they're all so great and I want to get that chance.

Junji (Again)

So then... Junji and Rie. I was nervous about going up to them again, but I don't know why. It wasn't like I was the only person that had multiple photos. I was still so embarrassed about running away from Rie before though, so I went to Junji first. He did that big crooked grin and stood upright when he saw me - it's such a cute expression and ngl it immediately made me less nervous. Despite his size, he exudes gentleness (even when he's nearly crushing you lol) and it's really comforting. The lady was changing the film (again! What luck) but this time I went up to him and said "I'm back again!" Unfortunately that was the same time he chose to say "Long time no see!" -- Which made us both laugh. I repeated what he said, but he repeated what I had said - I'm proud to say I shared a braincell with one of my biases for a second there, and it made him do that fucking adorable nose crinkle and smile again.

So we did our pose and I knew I wasn't going to walk away without saying something, this was my last chance, so I tried to speak - but he leaned really close to me (I'm not that short man, you don't have to bend down to hear me 😭). When he did, my brain short circuited - he is so fucking cute and I forgot how to speak English. For a good five seconds I was just stuttering "I--- will--" - but he just waited so patiently for me to stop being an idiot. Finally I managed to get my tongue to work and told him I'd see him again soon. Which isn't exactly what I wanted to say, but it was close enough. He leaned up and nodded and grinned and said "Yes we will!" and then he raised his fist for an exploding fist bump.

Rie (Again)

And thus left Rie. So I get up there and he grins and says "hi again" I mumbled what I hope sounded like hi. I forgot what the pose number was, so I just made the motion and he nodded and wrapped his arm around me really tight going "ah! yes". He had such a grip around my shoulders, I almost forgot to reach up and cup his chin lol. Other lyOns have mentioned that he really pulls you in, and they weren't kidding. I ended up wrapping my arm around his waist; he's so warm and soft, and he smells so amazing. Obviously, he's just, you know, a guy, but it was so relaxing for that moment - I would have gladly paid (more) money to just let him hug me for longer, he's got such a comforting touch.

He didn't immediately let go after the photo was taken (probably so I wouldn't run away from him again lol), instead he kept his arm around me and let me kind of step out of it. He raised one hand and I pressed palm to his; he wrapped his fingers around my hand and held me there, so I set my other hand on his bicep and finally met his gaze without panicking (go me!) - His gaze is so intense. I know I said that before, but it really is shocking. He gives his full attention to you and really focuses on what you're saying - it's really overwhelming, like you're the only person in the room with him, a friend, and not just a random person he met 10 seconds before. I told him that 'because' was the reason I ended up getting into OnlyOneOf and thanked him for it again. He grinned and bowed his head and thanked me, said I was too nice. He told me to have a nice night when I went to grab my photo, and I said "you do too"; he reached out one more time and squeezed my hand like he had been before and grinned before I walked off. That was the perfect end to the snapshots tbh.

Final Thoughts

And that was that - that was the whole experience, pretty much. Easily the best experience I've ever had relating to idols, concerts, or meeting celebrities in general. There's something special about these guys, the way they interact with fans, their overall vibe, idk. I didn't expect to get as overwhelmed by Rie as I did; up until that night my bias line was Junji and then Rie. That's really flipped - Rie is 100% the main bias, and to be entirely honest he's really fighting for Ult Bias spot and I think he's gonna take it. (Frankly the group is fighting for Ult Group and.. They are winning). Obviously it's an unfair advantage; I've never met my other idols aside from hi-touch, and it was really their interactions with me one on one that pushed them higher. They are amazing performers and do have a great stage charisma, but their ability to interact so easily and intimately with fans of all kinds was really what has shoved them a full head and shoulders above others.

Personally, I was anxious about meeting them. I know I'm not a stereotypical kpop fan. Obviously fans are diverse, but we have to admit, the majority is not made up of scruffy male presenting people. But this concert was so much more diverse than others I've been to, which was so great to see. And there was no difference in how they treated me versus how they treated their female presenting fans, their androgynous or enby fans, their clean shaven, younger male presenting fans, etc. That was so important to me. Being able to be comfortable as myself, not only with the friends I'd made but also with the group; not worrying about being perceived negatively; not sensing discomfort from any of them (real or imagined) - it meant the world to me, and I've genuinely never felt that welcome in a space like this before.

So that's that - this was a super long post, I'm sorry about that. While I was writing it, it let me go back and relive parts of it, realize things that I had overlooked before, etc. I hope it didn't bore anyone reading it to absolute tears. And I hope it encourages some of y'all to go see OOO if you have the chance. They are really amazing performers and guys, and I cannot wait to see them again.

#answered #ask #Anonymous #lyonblr #onlyoneof #ooo minneapolis #ooo rie #ooo mill #ooo kb #ooo yoojung #ooo nine #ooo junji #onlyoneof kb #onlyoneof rie #onlyoneof junji #onlyoneof nine #onlyoneof mill #onlyoneof yoojung

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princeresnikov · 2 years ago

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a creature that will do what i say (or love me back) {The Son}

{ its in my nature masterlist }

Summary: Flashback to 2011, and the first year of Clementine working as The Son's live-in bodyguard. It's simply a nice moment on a snowy, Winter evening where Clementine's cooking them both dinner, and he decides, for once, that he'd prefer to stay in for the night.

Or; The Son loves Clementine through Rose Coloured Glasses.

A/N: 2559 words. Clementine's nickname for The Son at the end of the fic is a reference to my headcanon that The Son's first name is Anatoly, which means sunrise, anyways,,,, this evidentially got out of hand, definitely didn't realise it would end up this long. but anyways, this is all from The Son's POV so (and this will be reiterated in the warning) the story appears to romanticise his relationship with her despite how it's clearly unhealthy. i wanna go on record since i don't think it's ever made 100% clear either here or in the main fic, but The Son never really loved Clementine as a person, and if there was any part of her he was 'in love with' it was simply the idea of who he wanted her to be that he'd created in his mind. also remember how i once said there was a bit of freudian fuckery with his early attraction to clementine because how he associates her with his dad. yeah there's hints of that. :l fuck that dude. i can't stop thinking about him. Tagging the taglist because it is part of canon. I'd love to hear any thoughts you guys have on this!! long note whoops.

Warnings: romanticisation of unhealthy relationship dynamics, clear power imbalance, dehumanisation and objectification of Clementine, The Son clearly has a saviour complex regarding Clementine, mentions/implications of murder & violence.

Taglist: @venusthepirate @malar-region @tangerinesgf @esmaada @sarcastic-sourwolf @djjskfkskjf @justshutupmars @somikesoc @chachadelight @andydre4m @evangelineflowers @darkchai @basementsoup @bellatrix124 @kunikidaswhore @thewinterschildren178 @felhomaly @perksofbeingamultifandomm @aniglio18 @geeiz @mimidior @justicex101 @ltlthetrifecta @salsasadd @gregorybrldgerton @xkawax @hellsgatelove22 @brownficgirl @tangerineswife @cigarettesandfigureskates @ceciliahargrove @welcometothescreaming20s @moonlight-matcha @lovv24 @nohemi2500 @tangerinefics @charlemagnethesecond @little-miss-bi @megplant

His Clementine is different in Winter, The Son realises. Or maybe it's the snow. She doesn't say she doesn't like the snow, but she makes a point of trying to only go out during the day if she has any say in it, and outright refuses to catch any kind of night train when it's snowing, even if it's the subway and the snow isn't even visible. Not that they catch the subway a lot, or the tube since they're currently in the London penthouse he chose to practically hibernate in this year.

Tonight weather prevents them from a picturesque sunset, and it's a Friday night, he should, by all accounts, be half a bottle into something expensive that he knows he doesn't really appreciate like he should, contemplating if he can be bothered looking for his own eyeliner or simply borrowing Clementine's, and messaging back the host of fairweather clubbing friends he has in this city. Clementine had even asked him if they were going out that night, and usually he would have said yes without hesitation, but he hadn't expected to see her like this and his brain short-circuits for a moment.

It's such a small moment, such a silly thing to be caught up with, but she's wearing one of his shirts, big even on him and falling off her shoulder here, crouching down to light the stovetop element beneath a large, metal pot. Her hair falls over her shoulder as she squints at the flame, adjusting it.

He wants to remember how this moment makes him feel, for the rest of his life.

"I got this terrible craving for this soup from home," she tells him distractedly, heading to the kettle by the sink, "it shouldn't take too long, once everything's in I can start getting ready; we can eat and go."

When they're alone, she speaks to him only in Russian. It hadn't always been like this, she hadn't always been like this; she'd been an alien when they'd met, all of his friends too caught up by how pretty she was to notice how quiet and strange she could be. Thankfully she'd listened to him, had learned from him, had relaxed enough to be enjoyable company.

Somewhere along the way, or perhaps it was simply a side effect of their constant proximity, he'd decided it was well within his rights to test his luck, and she had kissed him back. They grew fond of each other, and that fondness led to him continuing to push his luck, knowing she was still too professional by half to initiate anything, but glad he did when he sees her coy smile, hears her say that she'll do anything to make him happy. So if he were to think about it, that's when she began switching to Russian when they were alone, far gentler, far sweeter, than she ever was in English.

English is a business language, was all she'd really said on the matter.

"Don't rush, my Clementine" he tells her fondly, and Clementine pauses, looks to him as the kettle boils, confused. He smiles warmly at her, "it's meant to snow," he nods to the window. Clementine gives a wry smile, looking back to the kettle.

"As if that's ever stopped you before."

"If I want to go out and we get all caught up in it, you'll never let me hear the end of it," he sits at the kitchen island, elbows on the marble counter top and chin in his hands, grin stretching wide and teasing as Clementine laughs.

"As if that's ever stopped you before," she points out again, laughing through her words this time. She takes the kettle, now whistling, from it's little dock, carrying it over to the pot and pouring in the water.

"Aren't you happy I'm listening to you? Don't look a gift horse in the mouth," he warned, albeit teasingly, but Clementine, after putting the empty kettle back, grows visibly confused.

"Horse?" The moment she stops at the island across from him she pulled his shirt back up her shoulder. His eyes follow the movement, lingering for just a second before he meets her gaze again.

"Its a saying," is all he can offer. Clementine doesn't draw attention to it, but as she voices that she's still confused, she shifts her shoulders and allows the shirt to fall down once more. After a moment, his gaze follows the curve of her bare shoulder to her collar, and he finds himself smiling faintly, reminded of how well she knows him, how she knows even the little things that will make him just a little happier, "it means 'don't be ungrateful'."

"What is a 'gift horse'?" She asks, stepping away and opening the refrigerator, pulling out a package wrapped in paper, from the butcher.

"I don't know," he admits, sitting back on his stool, "it's just a saying."

Silence spills from one moment to the next as Clementine carefully opens the parcel and adds some kind of diced meat into the pot, and The Son finds his attention drifting from her, to the window behind her, the snow just beginning to fall.

"You'd look beautiful in the snow," he finds himself saying, almost idly. Clementine makes a distracted noise in the back of her throat that prompts him to elaborate as he gives the pot a stir, "you look beautiful in the snow, it's a shame you don't like it."

For a moment, Clementine glances at him, wearing an amused little smile.

"I look beautiful anywhere," she says bluntly, picking up the salt shaker and pouring a small heap into her hand, "that's why you take me everywhere," it's more of the truth than he'd like to agree to, seeing as she knows he believes 'bodyguard' is a vanity title. Still, he can't fault her for that.

"But not the snow," he prompts. After adding salt, Clementine grabs the pepper, and starts hunting through the cabinet above the stove for further spices as she deliberates. When it becomes clear that she's not going to answer him, he asks why.

"I don't mind the snow."

"During the day," he corrects pointedly.

"Have I ever complained about cold nights?" She asked, but even then, spices added, turning back to him with her hip cocked against the counter, her expression gives her away.

"Your face betrays you," he tells her gently, albeit with an exasperated kind of amusement; how could the usually so hyper aware Clementine not already know this? Tellingly, in that moment, her expression, or lack-thereof, doesn't shift.

"I..." she starts to move again, checking drawers and the sink, looking for something that she can't seem to find, "I'll tell it to stop that. I don't mean to seem unhappy with where we go."

"It's not unhappy," he sighs, stretching out his arms across the counter like a cat, chin resting on the marble counter, watching her through his lashes, "it's not anything. Like that time I stepped out of our train to Moscow that arrived late, and you hadn't done that security check you do when we get off trains; you had this look on your face but then it wasn't anything," he began to fidget with his fingers. "like every time we go somewhere and it gets dark, and whether or not it was snowing before, if its dark and it's snowing you just get all nothing and look at me for directions. I don't care, I just thought you'd be less of an alien by now."

Clementine makes a distracted, almost dissatisfied hum at his words, and her hands begin to move, miming as she keeps searching, as if the gesture will help manifest the object in question.

Except he can't exactly figure out what she's looking for judging by the gesture, as he's pretty sure that's not the type of movement one uses with a kitchen implement. One might even consider it lewd, the way her fingers were curled up, almost in a fist but not quite, as if she were holding something, thrusting it back and forth in a short, repetitive motion.

"My Clementine, what are you looking for?"

"One of the good cutting knives," she muses, gaze searching the kitchen- it's a stabbing motion, oh god, definitely not a jerking off motion, occurs to him all at once, and Clementine must catch on to his unexpected horror because she asks him what's wrong. He shakes his head, as if trying to shake the thoughts out, tells her it's nothing, but continues to remind her of the knife block by the microwave.

Violent instincts despite gentle intent; he frowns as she starts chopping vegetables on the cutting board further down the counter.

Even now 'bodyguard' felt more like a vanity title for her. Since he'd been old enough to travel abroad by himself, Clementine had been with him, and it's not as if there appeared to be anyone who gave enough of a shit about him as The White Death's son to try anything outside of Japan. When he'd told her as much, Clementine gave him an odd look, and told him he should pay better attention. Then again, she's always taken things far too seriously; it's probably why his father thought so highly of her. Despite her obligations to his son, The White Death would still send her contracts for whatever locale they happened to be in.

He'd asked his father if this was necessary, he'd even asked Clementine, but both had seen fit to remind him that despite how she may act, how she looks at him, she was not his by technicality. He's never liked that, but he knows better than to draw his father's ire; the man had never been above confiscating his toys when he was younger if he didn't play with them right, didn't treat them with respect.

Clementine had never divulged details of the contracts, and initially he'd thought it was because she was ashamed, that she'd been asked to do lowly busy work his father was simply too lazy to complete. Until she'd come back early from a job, not realising she'd woken him up as she'd let herself into their hotel room at four in the morning. While she'd closed the bathroom door she hadn't bothered to lock it, and when The Son goes to see what was wrong, he sees the scratches up and along her forearms, and how she had shed her large coat and pretty, little cocktail dress to pick glass out of the wounds near her sternum.

The minute she had locked eyes with him she seemed startled, and practically sprang to her feet from where she'd been sitting on the edge of the bathtub, asking if he was okay. He wants to ask why somebody would do this to her, but realises he really doesn't want to know the answer. So he nods jerkily and closes the door as he leaves her be.

In two days, while they're having breakfast, he'll watch her take a photo of a little article near the back of one of the daily papers, and send it to someone. When he glances at it out of curiosity a little later, he sees a short article about some high profile criminal prosecutor being found dead in his office the day prior from autoerotic asphyxiation. The scratches on Clementine's arms are still visible, still healing.

Nothing else about her had changed, she even spent the better part of that night helping him talk the prettiest girl at the club into coming back to the hotel with him.

And the scratches will fade, and he'll pretend like what he saw that night was a dream, and he won't have to accept Clementine's capacity for violence. Because, not that he'd ever admit it out loud, it was less upsetting, less emasculating, than the alternative.

Maybe that's why he likes moments like these, moments ripped from some domestic fantasy he never knew he had. Clementine looking soft and warm in his clothes while she cooks something that smells like home. Which it does.

He can count on one hand the amount of times his father had taken the time to cook for him and his sister. His Aunt had come to live with them after Prince was born, but before that his mother had been doing most of the cooking. His dad had been too paranoid to even consider a nanny, but his mother never seemed to mind. She was a talented cook, something he'd taken for granted in his youth, but had come to appreciate; she used to tell him stories about how she travelled when she was young, how she fell in love with all these different dishes around the world and had learned to cook them through trial and error. His father, on the other hand, knew only a few dishes, ones from his childhood, that were hearty and rich and would 'help him grow into a strong young man'.

And the few times his Clementine had cooked for him, like now, they've always made these moments smell like home. Are these the moments in which his parents fell in love? His mother seeing a gentle kind of love and familiarity in his father's cooking despite the man's capacity for violence? Was it one of the only ways he knew how to show his love at first? Is Clementine like that too?

He wants a million moments like this, a million moments where she's by his side across the world, where she lights up when she sees him, where she'd follow him to the ends of the Earth. However many moments it would take to make her violent instincts nothing more than a bad dream, and a million more, all of them echoing that first time they were together and her 'I'll do anything to make you happy'.

"Are you alright, Sunshine?" Clementine says softly, bringing him out of his thoughts. She only ever calls him Sunshine in moments like this, a play on his name's meaning in lovingly familiar Russian, away from the prying eyes of the rest of the world.

"Come here, my Clementine," he tells her, and Clementine obligingly sets down the spoon she was stirring the stew with, rounding the counter to join him.

They fit together, they always find a way to, now with her standing between his legs, her arms around his neck as his hands rest on her hips. The scars she bares, all the more on display for the oversized shirt draped off one shoulder even now, make his gut ache; once reminders of her violent past, he tells himself he could keep her from further harm if she stayed with him. Violence neither received or inflicted, safe in his arms.

"You are beautiful everywhere," he agrees with her earlier statement, smiling softly, "but most beautiful here."

"Exactly here?" Clementine teases softly, leaning in to rest her forehead against his.

"Exactly here," he breathes, "cold night but warm apartment, my apartment, my clothes, my Clementine," he tells her, "like it was made for you."

His Clementine kisses him.

But all he wonders is what else he has to say or do, what moments he has to luck into like this one, when would he finally hear her admit that she loves him? Hasn't he been good to her? Hasn't he been gentle and kind? Hasn't he earned her love, her loyalty by now? Doesn't he deserve to at least hear that?

Doesn't she want to make him happy?

#the son #the white death #the son x oc #the son imagine #bullet train #bullet train 2022 #bullet train imagine #bullet train fanfic #the son x reader #the son bullet train #the white death bullet train #white death #white death bullet train #roshan resnikov #tangerine x clementine #its in my nature #logan lerman x oc #logan lerman imagine #Spotify

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