#eh.. update i guess???

[sihtricfedaraaahvicius]

Hi

I have not been actively checking my notifs the past few days and will continue to do so for a while as I noticed that (in general) not checking tumblr has definitely improved my headspace. That being said, now that I am here I obviously have seen the kind and encouraging messages some of you have left me after my last text post a few days ago, through comments or direct messages, and I appreciate all of you who were kind and caring enough to take a moment and try to make me feel a little better, it once again means a lot. Some messages gave me the courage to write this post, as I'd rather not talk too much about myself here but some of you made it clear that you deeply care, so the least I can do is give a little insight on what I'm up to in a way. I also got a quick glance at some of the responses to my October wallpaper kick-off post and the fall/"spooky" themed edits, and those responses made me smile too. If you liked my last post you might be happy to hear that I have a lot more of those coming. Since fall and October in general is my time of the year I decided to not fully take my leave here but try and be creative with edits (in this case wallpapers/lockscreen ideas) instead of actively trying to write. I noticed I am greatly enjoying that for now and I have created a bunch of edits that will be posted through a queue from now until October.

Once again I am not checking notifs actively, I am not scrolling on my dash and I only open my dms every other day for as long as I feel I need to, so please know I am not ignoring anyone with ill intend, I just feel more at ease not trying to keep up as it has proved to be not good for me in the past. It's better to keep yourself out of the loop on your own accord and do your own thing really. But that also means that I will most likely not see what anyone tags me in, so if there's something you think I really should see please feel free to dm the post so I can have a look (that does not go for fics currently as I won't be reading those for a little while either as I try to focus on my own creativity).

Long story short really... the reason why I can't seem to fully leave this place is because I can't let my man's tag die down here like that.

[okanra]

The whole “Trunks and Goten in High school AU” webcomic is being soft-rebooting, more properly this time and not just a “fan art stuff”. This is more like an adaptation for an art assignment now, which is really nostalgic for me.

This webcomic series’s name is “The UNSPOKEN” anyway, it’s much shorter than its original name and much more concise ✌️

[windydrawallday]

Long-PSA-short of sorts that's more a vent: I was always aware my behavior and way of expressing myself online can surprise many people, especially if they are not used to someone who uses the writing medium as a playful form to tell emotions in a very descriptive way as I do. I'm quite affectionate with words, yes. And I always beg people I hang with personally to let me know if some of that bothers them, curtly of course. So far there have been few instances of individuals confusing those signals with ulterior means, things I assure you there's nothing more than me being friendly and supportive.

Imagine idk an excited dog seeing its owner haha

Until the past week, I found myself being tackled by something that made me almost knock everything aside because it made me realize that probably I'm a walking trigger/squick inducer with even the way I wield words like "love" and "friendship".

Almost...

I'm pretty tolerant of whatever way people conduct themselves in this life, the only moment I flinch is when an individual assumes from my default behavior and presentation that I want to impose my way of life... And nopes.

This is simply how and who I am. Nothing more, nothing less. I don't search for conflict but for understanding. My language for expressing marvel and reflections is like this, never to make the other feel awkward or attacked.

So, it upset me knowing that by wielding this forever welcoming and lovable disposition, I can be something to fear and even despite... to some people.

But, you know? That means that my "love" and "friendship" lifestyle are not made for you, no reason to come back to me and point at it. Just keep walking if you have only rage and rejection to give as a reply to my point of view. Because by wielding rage and rejection, what you only do is burn bridges. To create conflict and assume imaginary antagonistic scenarios where there's nothing of that at all.

You can't create the world you wish to live in by burning bridges.

It took me a lot too to forge who I am right now. I even keep learning and chiseling through traumas and mistakes—kindness and patience taught me more than rage and rejection. And "love" and "friendship" are the bricks I chose to build those bridges. I know everyone else uses different concepts but in the end, we all build bridges. By creating bridges and inviting others to do the same, I expand not only my world, but the other's too!

Isn't that better than demanding to be this or that through a black/white flag of rage and rejection? I think so. And I understand perfectly we sometimes need to be blunt when marking our boundaries. Still, never justifies treating the other bad.

And if some of you find "fake" or distasteful the way I wear this flag of "love" and "friendship" I'm sorry: this place will never be safe for you then. The exit door is always open. Go ahead.

I hope you find your place and flags out there too, but don't forget that to do that you need to build bridges. If you don't want to call it "friendship" call it "glue" or whatever makes you comfortable, but don't kick people like me who fought with claws and teeth to reclaim those words and feelings.

Fight your fight by being a good example, not a bad experience that makes someone never want to deal with something like this again in their life.

"Any color you like, (in the end) they're all blue."

[fox-guardian]

Any of the Archive Gang's fur babies. I don't care which, but there is always space in the universe for floof.

[ID: Three digital drawings of Poundcake on a muted teal background. Poundcake is a brown pit bull with a white tummy, white front paws, and white hind legs, and the tip of her tail is white. Her eyes are dark brown and her ears are floppy. The first drawing is a bust of her smiling with her tongue out. The second drawing is of her sitting down and wagging her tail, smiling upwards with a heart-shaped sparkle in her eye. The drawing is heavily foreshortened, making her nose look very large. The third drawing is more sketchy, and shows her as a puppy, asleep with her snout in a purple sneaker. An arrow points to her and says "missed him" and an arrow points to the sneaker and says "Tim's shoe". Her face is wrinkled up around where it rests on the edge of the shoe's opening. She is not much larger than the shoe. end ID]

~~~~

i am constantly thinking about tim's dog poundcake of @archivistbot lore. tim having a dog is so Real to me and a pit bull?? named POUNDCAKE?? catering to ME SPECIFICALLY the concept is so real to me it feels so right.

also the one where she's got her face in tim's shoe is based on a thing my dog did with my dad's shoe when she was a puppy it was the cutest thing ever

[todayisafridaynight]

Religiously i think about one of my twitter mutuals pointing out how aoki's design is subtly asymmetrical while ichiban is more symmetrical

when i think of it, masato's design is fairly symmetrical as well isnt it.....

[illegiblehandwriting1]

good question: when's s&a ch17 coming out

better question: do we need ch17 at all

[crmsndragonwngss]

Pretend we never stopped pretending

I'll hold you while the world is ending

It's killing me and I don't have a fighting chance

[ei-mugi]

made my fic available to guests to read. here it is: da capo al fine

its a mugi-centric time travel 'fix it' where he and mika find themselves back at the start of the war shortly after watarus execution. mugi wants to stay there and mika wants to leave, which leads to them competing with each other. whats more their feelings from the future make them act differently and change the course of the war. though its less about like The War itself and more about their relationships and them as people

- its currently at 3 chapters and 10.7k words - rated T & no archive warnings apply - eimugi, shumika, minor wataei (though shipping isnt the Point of the fic) - mugi & natsume, mika & nito, makoto & izumi & leo(? will see what i do w this in ch4)

[books-are-my-life-stuff]

Haven't opened this game for three weeks. She's not who I wanted but Anabel is cool so I welcome her anyway.

Will be leaving her at 1/5 until I can figure out her playstyle.

[ickyguts]

man tumblr rly bustin my balls rn 💔

[dexaroth]

I wonder how badly AI will impact the storage spaces of basically every website given how um. Immediate you can make them images

guess we should start bracing for mass inactive account deletions (harder than before ofc bc its an inevitability)

[batemanofficial]

target has petits fours now? ok

[trossards]

i can’t watch the game but ehm … arsenal wyd

[ev-n-learning]

ty both @sulfurousmirrorscapes & @lacinkaju for letting me know what some of the words i was missing were, posts have been updated accordingly :3

[fcturehearts]

open: m / f / nb plot: callie is currently an low league level footballer and is trying to impress a WSL squad manager to earn a place on a WSL team and so she often cancels plans with your muse last minute or ignores their messages entirely to go and do extra training with specalised trainees and scouts and so now your muse is confronting her about her flakiness. connection: up to you ! just let me know in the tags/reply :) 

       ‘ look - i’ve already APOLOGISED like twenty times, what more do you want from me ? ’ callie questions, tone of exasperation clear in her voice as she speaks. deep down she knows her behaviour is flaky, knows this is the third time this week she’s blown the other off to go and train at different stadiums but it’s just how she is. callie has always been career focused and goal driven and will stop at nothing to achieve that goal, regardless of who might get hurt in the process. 

                   pauses to take a sip from her water bottle before chucking it down onto the pitch, a sigh tumbling past now dampened lips. she truthfully hadn’t expected them to turn up to the pitch after her cancelling again and maybe that was poor hindsight on her side. not sure how long they’d been stood on the side lines watching until callie spotted them and as she skipped over she almost naively expected to be met with some level of happiness not coldness and grit. ‘ this is about my career y’know ?��doing well and impressing someone like marc, jonas or emma is important to me... ’

[comet-frog]

Kinda tempted to also go by Lemmy ngl