#ego death fic

[nile-the-empathy-cleric]

I will update Ego Death tonight hopefully (tomorrow at the latest). Life has been crazy lately and so many things got in the way of writing/ editing. One of my irl cases became incredibly overwhelming and I felt really burnt out. I love what I do but sometimes the system sucks and dealing with courts, angry families, and CPS is extremely taxing and disheartening. I cried every time I had supervision the past 3 weeks. It’s been rough, but writing again has been a release. I am so grateful to every who’s been supporting this fic and me! You’re the best 💕

[nile-the-empathy-cleric]

I’m so excited about this and am unbelievable grateful! Thank you so much @erebus0dora for once again blessing us Devil’s Minion lovers with your incredible art. And thank you for bringing one of the most tender parts of my fic to life 💜💜💜

this might get an accidental double publication bc the web connection fails me, but still-

-this belongs to @nile-the-empathy-cleric, the author of the gorgeous Ego Death. this might also be the first commission of mine in three years that's not a slow thing brewing for a long-term friend.

anyway. them touches and tenderness. we all need this 💜

[sapphicmutt77]

CW: Ego/Identity Death! Continue with care!

Oh to be reset. Maybe even erased.

Imagine being taken by something beautiful, you're minding yourself, existing as you always have, and the next moment you're somewhere else. A basement, a garden, a quiet segment of forest, it doesn't matter. And she's there, she stands in front of you. Her eyes are as gentle as can be. You try to scream but she puts a finger to your lip.

"Shhh, it's okay pet, you're safe. I know how you've suffered." She plays with your hair, she leans in to kiss you on the cheek. You don't resist, you don't want to. "I'm here to make things much better~"

You feel something sharp penetrate the back of your neck. You feel it drain you, perhaps not physically, but you feel your grip on reality lessen moment by moment. Your memories are fading, at first a day, then a week, fragments disappearing moment by moment. Where did you go to school? I've forgotten. Who is your family? I don't have one.

"Don't worry pet, it'll all be over soon, you'll be able to start from zero, doesn't that sound lovely?"

It does sound lovely. So lovely. You choke back sobs for a moment, unable to tell if they are tears of joy or fear. You call out to the woman through tears.

"Yes Pet?" She says, her voice smooth as honey.

"Please... Hold me..."

Her arms wrap around you, squeezing you into a comfortable warm embrace. She pets your head, humming a gentle tune as your eyes flicker.

"Good night pet, it's time for you to rest."

Your eyes softly close.

When you awake, well, maybe not you, but you, she's there.

You don't know who she is. You don't know where you are. You don't know your name. It's scary. Everything is scary.

You curl up in a ball as you begin to sob, it's the only thing that makes sense. She comes over to you, and gently pets you. You look up to her with innocent eyes. She's so pretty.

She tells you your name, she tells you that she'll be your caretaker from now on. She tells you that she will love you to the fullest. She tells you that you'll never have to worry again. Even through the fog, you know she's telling the truth. Her earnest love sings through ever word. She offers you her hand. You reach for it with your shaky paw and hold it tight. She helps you up, your poor legs give out as you find them hard to use. She doesn't let you stumble for long as she lifts you into a princess carry. You nuzzle into the crook of her neck. She's so soft. After some minutes of walking and being carried, you hear a door creak open. A flurry of warmth floods over you.

"Welcome home pet~"

You feel your heart beat and your cheeks flush. A warm delight blossoms deep within you.

You smile.

You're home!

[doctordiscord123]

Whumptober 2024: Emotional Angst

Wilford grieves Dark in the aftermath of his death.

For @whumptober, @whumptober-archive

Commission Info | Buy me a ko-fi

+++++

Wilford sat in the garden, feeling the breeze as the sun cast brilliant golds and oranges across the sky, and the leaves rained gold down upon him. He scratched at the scars on his arms, staring up at the sky, watching the clouds as the slowly floated by. He drew a deep breath, and breathed in the scent of autumn, of leaf rot and changing winds as the crisp air set upon their mountain home.

“I wonder what you’re doing, now. If you’re happy.” His voice was soft, spoken to no one but the wind, and he twisted the wedding band on his finger. The engraving on the inside was slowly wearing down thanks to the new anxious habit, but he still knew it by heart.

Till the end of time, my love.

“You said we’d be together forever.” Wilford’s voice choked up, and he swallowed hard, blinking back tears. “You said we were permanent. That we’d never be apart.”

Read the rest on Ao3!

[felixravinstills]

trick or treat!

Boo! And Happy Halloween ! Peter, you get a trick-treat hybrid that is a glimpse into my previous brainstorming/fic planning notebook. Here are two pages each from Tu Fui, Ego Eris and The Love Perfected by Death sections. (Check the alt text if you can’t read it)

Many things… just don’t make it into the fic unfortunately. And also many ideas adapt and change during the actual fic writing!

[nile-the-empathy-cleric]

Awww omg thank you 🥰 I’m behind on getting chapter 11 up, but it should be updated tonight or tomorrow!

I’m so grateful to everyone following along and supporting me 💕

Honestly, I feel like I can’t make any stronger recommendation for @nile-the-empathy-cleric’s fic “ego death” than saying i’ve been reflexively checking my email every hour or so waiting for a lil email from ao3 saying there’s been an update….

(no but really it is so great if you’ve not read, what are you doing, go check it out)

[pussyterminator88]

Hellooo rare sighting…vinylssss 👋😉

The music was eclectic sounding for sure 🤙

[meteorstricken]

[devilbrakers]

mac rly fixes el without even meaning to 😭

[nile-the-empathy-cleric]

Omg thank you so much 😭 you’re too kind 💗💗💗

this is a call out post for fanfic author @nile-the-empathy-cleric of ego death (armand goes to therapy) fic fame:

ouch!

edit: and thank you i appreciate you

[faislittlewhiteraven]

Fai's Fic Ramble: The GorseTale AU (bare basics)

Ever since roughly... 2017 I think, there been a single Undertale fanfic I've been tapping away at and though it's nowhere near done or even organised enough for me to think about posting chapter 1 on A03, I recently posted a spinoff fic related to it called Eight Coloured Picture about the deaths of all the fallen humans and how some monsters each time were effected by their passing, and well.

I wanna ramble about the main story that fic comes from for a bit!

So.

Working Title: 'Gorse, Blackthorn and Buttercups' I also call it GorseTale in my head for short since Gaijin Goombah's rather fun video on why Undertale's Golden Flowers are most likely Gorse was a HUGE inspiration for the fic back when I started out (it's er changed quiet a bit since then but I'm keeping the flower vibes because Chara likes them and I did way too much research into both practical and symbolic uses for plants in the Underground for this fic not to use at least some of it at some point XD).

Core premise: Story is a Slice of Life/Drama AU set around Frisk being born in the Underground and taken in by Toriel right around the time of 'Undertale canon' (for Undertale Yellow fans, roughly a year or so after Clover's death), and through a series of domino effects stemming from that, various monsters of the Underground are confronted with the flaws of both themselves and their kingdom, and as a result start putting in effort to try fixing things so the little human child they've become so attached to can actually live their life to the fullest without fear of being murdered just for being born a non monster.

Aka: Toriel and Sans experience the joys and terror of co-parenting a child who only survives past the age of 3 because they have phenomenal cosmic power. Papyrus discovers the Royal Guard is NOT in fact something he wants to join (and accidentally becomes politically active in an effort to right by his new nibbling). Undyne takes some time to really rethink her career path and motives. Alphys somehow manages to turn former mistakes into miracles (oh and cures death maybe). Mettaton learns to take time off and share the spotlight, and finally King Asgore gets a surprising amount of hope in encouraging peaceful rebellion against his own accidental dictatorship.

Main cast: Rotates a bit since every major monster (and Flowey) matters in this and who's most in focus depends on the exact arc but Toriel, Sans, Papyrus, Chara and Frisk are the ones who I have the most planned scenes for since well, they're where the 'domino effect' starts.

Ships: Fic is pretty gen for the most part but leaning Undyne/Alphys, Papyrus/Mettaton (who knew all Paps needed to become popular was to openly try convincing monster kind that killing all the humans is wrong in front of a very specific underground star XD), and some very very very slowburn Sans/Toriel (is teased throughout the story because Sans IS Frisk's other parent Sans just means 'Dad' in Frisk speak and I find various Monsters' "Wait Sans has a kid- Wait Sans is married?!" reactions hilarious (Paps giving 'context' to why he suddenly has a nibbling to Undyne especially) but actual, real Soriel doesn't happen until near the very end because Toriel is Not Ok, Sans leans AroAce/Demi and both agree that while the odd kiss, hug or 'real talk' is fine neither up for anything more than that right now. Also Toriel has yet to get a formal divorce and er, she can't even think of him for much of the fic without wanting to set him on fire so... Yeah). Also considering Mad Mewmew/Asgore (because funny but also oddly sweet), and Mettaton trying to get over a crush on Alphys at the start (due to Mettaton's Winter Alarmclock dialogue reframing all of Mettaton's actions in canon in a whole newlight for me), but for the most part romance really isn't a focus.

Things to set it apart from every other 'Frisk grows up in the Underground' fanfic:

A LOT of worldbuilding focus on stuff how monsters get food and materials.

Toriel teaching everyone how Monster society was before the War vs now (aka lots of cultural trauma themes here).

More emphasis on how little Monster society these days really knows about things they really should given their Kingdom's plans.

Sans 'timeline trauma' getting tossed out the window for joining Toriel in 'worried parent' stress (hard to be upset about LOADS when they're specifically stopping a toddler you love from getting murdered).

Papyrus accidentally making everything better just because for the sake of his nibblet he can't back down.

FLOWER SYMBOLISM AND DISCUSSING THE UNDERGROUND'S VERY IMPORTANT PLANT LIFE!

Undyne having a character growth arc triggered by Papyrus.

Mettaton having a character growth arc triggered by Papyrus (and a passing mention of Napstablook).

Alphys not being fired post Amalgamite reveal making her realize she has in fact actually kinda created the cure for death (by 'Falling Down') or at the very least is only maybe three steps away from that and actually works on that alongside a bunch of other stuff with other scientists because working alone sucked.

Lots of focus on the humans who fell before Frisk because their lives mattered! and also the Blue Soul was Kris because damn if I don't feel the need to really hammer in Toriel's trauma caused by Asgore here

NarraChara and Napstablook being ghost buddies =D they suck at it but Chara will take literally anyone who can hear them for company and Napstablook feels bad about that

Snowdin being secretly a hub of human sympathisers! (None of them knew they weren't the only ones).

MONSTER RADIO and ANIME/WESTERNS ON TV!

Tems and the Riverperson mattering while still being true to their very weird selves!!!

Asgore learning that he DOES in fact have a lot of influence and that maybe, juuust maybe, that his screw ups were worse for his Kingdom than he already thought (don't worry Asgore fans, despite my having to write a lot of Asgore grr due to Toriel being a major character, saving him and showing how much he loves his people is a major goal of mine <3). He still f%cked up majorly though XD

Frisk dealing with, well, the stress of growing up in a place that says their death would make everyone (except their immediate loved ones) happy and constantly having to live in hiding/disguise...

Flowey being a murderous little shit but also not having reset power and both Frisk and Chara in his life again.

Undertale Yellow and Deltarune characters! Who probably won't be in focus a lot but they've helped me out a ton for fleshing the out my setting so I will 100% be giving them at least a little screen time to make up for that (like Amalgamate Kanako playing with Frisk, and Martlet and Noelle being VERY interesting in Papyrus's 'Lets not kill the humans' movement for reasons our main characters will eventually learn <3).

Oh and a huge amount of 'Unseen in game' areas I made for the Underground which include:

SnowDen: a 'town' of Dog and Rabbit made tunnels underneath the ENTIRE Snowdin region (connects to every dog sentry post, the 'Toby Fox secret area' and the 'very efficiently laid out' travel tunnels seen in canon Undertale). Generally requires those living there to get through given how winding and confusing the tunnels can get (all guideposts are puzzles made with scent markers...).

TooHot: basically a 'lethal lava land' housing district for fire monsters below general Hotland. Predates the Wat and is too hot for most non fire monsters to go anywhere near (the current name was given by Asgore though).

Cliffstop: a 'thin' vertical crevice monsters in New Home unearthed a while back that goes from from all the way to the very top of Mt Ebott down to the dark of the Abyss below (locals there call the top of the area Clifftop and the lowest safe for travel Cliffdrop). Gets a fair bit of sun and has flying room so it's popular with plant and flying monsters but the cliffs are very unstable so the bottom is covered in rope nets to prevent accidents. Most puzzles about the place are moving rope bridges, loading up vertical conveyer belts with the correct weights and 'light and mirror' puzzles.

Riverfolk Waterway and True Tem Village: settlements hidden deep within Waterfall's 'unreachable in canon' winding waterways. The former is a small inlet where 'Riverfolk' monsters like the Riverperson have a small collection of boathouses they dock at, and the later is exactly what is sounds like, with the 'Temmie Village' we see in canon being merely a Temmie trading outpost. Can accessed only by Riverperson boat or the Temmie's secret tunnels and is home to all sorts of cool things like the Temmie 'Colleg' and 'DEEP HISTORY mUSEEum'~ XD

WebbInn 'the Spider district': Mostly a giant communal spider web hanging Hotland's ceiling but also connected to a tunnel that goes up near Mt Ebbot's peak (the spiders have been digging upwards in hopes of getting a 'sunspot' they can use to advertise their 'sweet little town' to tourists). Has a... Very distinctive culture compared to the rest of the Underground and the 'puzzles' there tend towards being 'social' in nature (aka fey logic games where how you speak and act gets you directed every which way).

Starlite Strip: A little connecting area right underneath the path/cliff Monster Kid and Frisk see the castle while travelling through Waterfall in Undertale Canon. Not a big settlement on its own but something of a trading hub for monsters from New Home and the surrounding areas in Waterfall to buy and sell goods (also has a LOT of Royal Guard presence which is why absolutely no one in Undertale recommends it to the very human Frisk). Very sparkly but in a gentle 'crystals, glowing water and fire flies' kinda way.

And... Yeah. Wanna post a full script of what I've got planned so far but this post is already massive so will do that in a bit.

Will say though that the general ending plan for this fic arguably goes full fix fic with:

12-14 year old Frisk comes out as human publicly and goes through the entire Underground arguing their case (something the Underground has been publicly debating for the last 10 years or so thanks to a very motivated Papyrus and a wanting more ratings + genuinely interested Mettaton).

Undyne attempts to kill them but well, she's only going all out because she and Paps had a deal about this (he vowed that he'd defend any innocent human from her killing them so she could still go all out at her job) and Frisk knows that.

Mettaton gets to do THE biggest and most historically important interview in the Underground's history.

Asgore declares that the Underground will try out this whole 'everyone in the kingdom votes' thing on both the upcoming war and how they will treat humans living here because he wants to make sure he's doing what his people want (Mettaton asks what Asgore will vote but Asgore, finally realizing his own influence, refuses to say).

Asgore and Frisk spend a nice, if slightly nervously time together drinking tea and talking about the future while the votes are being counted. (Toriel and others may join them but mostly this is Asgore getting to know... the last of Toriel's adopted children she told him about the others when she asked for a divorce).

Monsters choose wisely because for all this fic is 'Monsters are flawed too!' they are good people and I want to make that clear <3

Cue Frisk publically trying to help break the barrier while being very alive...

Flowey pulling a 'God of Hyper Death' except well, he, Frisk and Chara maaay have discussed a bit of this beforehand (Flowey did want the souls and this would get him them), so er, the fight might be a touch more mixed with genuine anger and playfulness. Note: Still working out the exacts.

The human SOULs get brought back to life as monsters while Flowey gets a SOUL of his own and Chara gets enough magical matter to be visible to people other than Frisk (it required less waste of the accumulated magic, the soul of an additional human another girl falling into the Ruins was what got Frisk deciding to come out actually, the kids using a bunch of Alphys' furthered research on the interplay between Determination, matter and Dust, and breaking down the dead humans' bodies for enough 'compatible matter' to work with, and the destruction and repurposing of the Barrier but hey! Back to life! Or arguably Chara's case an upgrade to proper ghost-hood). Oh and the Amalgamates that want it are safely separated but not sure if that's a 'before no' thing or a 'here in this big finale' thing~ XD

And yeah. That's all of my 'extra happy ending just because I can' stuff the entire fic eventually builds towards. Will post all my planned scenes/'domino effect planning' some other time but for now I'm done.

If you liked any ideas in this feel free to use them please (I'm a slow ass writer and I write what I want to see more of in the world XD) and er, hope this was a fun ramble to read <3

[nile-the-empathy-cleric]

Finished my Armand portrait for chapter 9!

It’s a weird blend of high Renaissance meets Mughal paintings. My brain trying to force book and amc backstories together created whatever this is. I think he came out so pretty! Maybe I just have to carry this around with me in case I ever meet Assad Zaman… it would be like the time I met Tamino and gave him the portrait I drew of him. Who’s being parasocial? Not me! Anyway enjoy my postcard size Armand fan art 💗

[i-miss-lotor]

My third eye suddenly opened and now I'm stuck thinking about a crossover between Stranger Things and Voltron, specifically the parallels between Billy, Max and Lotor

I mean. Just think about it. They had Neil and Zarkon as abusive fathers. Lotor had to kill his own dad, since Zarkon did try to enslave or kill everyone who didn't agree with his species, and all he got that it was for the greater good. No one said anything, not a 'sorry you had to go through that', not a question about his feelings on the matter. Just a 'good job, moving on'.

And Lotor spent so much time trying to be good. Trying to connect with others, trying to be better than his dad. He thought he finally had a place in the world, had people who understood and loved him. Only to get betrayed again and again and no one was even willing to hear him out. Between the pressure and the quintessence, of course he snapped. And they didn't try to save him.

Billy, on the other hand, didn’t try to be good, because he knew there was no point. He knew he was never going to be good enough even though part of him wanted to. He couldn’t keep inside all that hurt and he tried to be more like his dad, he wanted to feel like he has power and not just some weakling, so he took his anger out on others all the time. Of course people didn't like him. Of course they hated him. He was a mean asshole.

So when he died, I wonder what the others told Max. I wonder if Max got the same treatment Lotor did about Zarkon's death, because Billy was mean and killed people (possessed or not) even if he did die a heroic death, I wonder if she had to hear things like 'it's for the better', 'he deserved it'.

And it hurts to think about that Max saw Billy as he was, late or not, that Max was willing to be there for him, while Lotor didn't have a Max. He should have had people to care for him and hear him out, he thought he did, but well. There are no happy endings for them.

[copaganda-clobberfest]

Wait are you writing a fic? What one (If you don’t mind me asking)

Yeah I am… it’s a dumb silly goofy rwby fic :( which has sadly taken over my brain. and you should definitely not click this link that definitely doesn’t send you straight to its first 5 chapters

[dirtyoldmanhole]

6yrold!krad 🤝 gunter

absolutely hating the indignity of physical therapy

[goodieghostyarchive]

Anyway uhhhh, just updated my rare pair fic for Murder Mark and Yandereplier

There is gore, non-consensual drug use, soon to be smut, stalking, death, blood-they're a stalker and a murderer. There's gonna be all of that. Fair warning.