#effective negotiations

[azeutreciathewicked]

This is how most good policy gets made and managed - real discussions and negotiations done quietly with only the relevant people in the room. No cameras, no bluster. It also seems "boring" because it's not a spectator sport. But it's important and valuable, and essential to a functioning society.

And it wasn't just Buttigieg doing it - he had a whole team of people doing research, looking at policy, bringing people to the table, etc.

People who have experience with politics and policy know this, but a lot of people don't know this. We need to make sure people adjust their expectations to recognize when effective and good governance is happening.

Remember that social media is but a pinhole into the world and what people are thinking and doing. If there is political theater happening, it's probably because someone is trying to influence you. And sometimes this is good - getting people excited to vote is important.

But that's only a small part of the story. The rest is quiet work like this, that requires expertise, nuance, and an interest in working with people who have different interests but want a fair deal.

[sleepynegress]

THIS ISN'T COMMON KNOWLEDGE BUT SHOULD BE...ABOUT MEDICAID....

If you ever find yourself in the position of living in the home of a parent who is disabled and requires full-time care and you are their primary caregiver for at least 2 years, and they intend to leave their assets to you after they pass, make sure to transfer ownership of their assets, home/land in your name ASAP...or they will require you to pay back any benefits received and claim those assets even out from under you, as soon as your loved one passes. This is yet another way that generational assets /wealth are easily taken out of marginalized communities. It is a loan.

And the sharks circle as soon as your loved one passes. Here's an article about it:

Decided to add context. I don't like to talk about it here, because ehh, social media is for my vapid entertainment thoughts for me. It's a hobby/getaway/ place to get semi-social with strangers and online friends with shared interests, but I don't want anyone else to go through what I am... Of course, this applies specifically to the U.S.'s broken healthcare system. So, for those who don't know, my mom passed recently. I am an only child with no siblings or children. My whole life during that time was 24/7 care. She had insurance, but it wasn't enough to cover everything that she needed, so Medicaid was the obvious solution, right? The government takes care of our disabled elderly who have worked until retirement, right? It seemed like the routine thing to do, I had never heard anything during the process about having to pay it back,but sure enough, less than 12 weeks after her passing, I was hit with a warning (which I followed up on and was told I would NOT be charged because of my caregiver status) and then 2 weeks later the "bill". The lady I spoke to, totally changed her attitude from the first time I spoke to her to the point where I felt scammed. Out came a patronizing voice certain people use with children, that measured whiny thing (it's always a red-flag to me and makes me instantly dislike you if you do this even with kids, btw... speak to kids like PEOPLE). I feel like an idiot. I have been doing this for over a decade and didn't think to transfer any assets of hers during that time because it *was* hers. I wanted her to feel as empowered about that as possible.

Not a single soul said I should transfer those assets to keep this from happening and now I'm facing down what feels like some kind of weird conspiracy to take the land and house.

FYI, there have been weird inquiries, the census came to mark down my mother's death literally *immediately* after she passed...and odd timing called the day of the notice to "help", with all the southern Christian signifiers (bless your heart we'll be praying for you).... It feels so seedy. Anyway, all this to say if you find yourself in a similar position....

TRANSFER THOSE ASSETS INTO YOUR NAME 2 years into caregiving or they will take them from you, house etc..

[existentiol]

something that pisses me off in RA is that Flanagan will occasionally hype up Pauline as this super important and prominent figure in Will’s life, even treat her as a proxy for the mother he never knew, and yet will just refuse to show it beyond the like. two or three (personal) conversations that they have in canon. I get that he was attempting to make her an important person in Will’s life but why not do that by actually making her an important person in Will’s life

[assortedvillainvault]

Love that prompt list! How about 24 - “Did you just bite me?” - for the DV'Cule, please?

In honour of the fact I've just quit my weekend job - DC please humbly accept my first outrightedly suggestive prose answer: praise the soup and your patience, here we go:

TLDR: Venomous bites and kinky viziers is certainly a match, and not one made in heaven, even for gods.

TW: Suggestive themes, biting, nothing overtly described. Implied threesome.

Did you just Bite Me?! - The DVCule: Jafar x Hades X Facilier

The yelp that cuts though the warm, heavy air startles them so badly that someone – Facilier maybe – tumbles off the bed with a swear, helped by one of Hades legs as the god flails. Flames roar between blue and orange as he grabs the back of Jafar’s head and tries to yank, grunting at the teeth buried in his shoulder.

The sorcerer remains locked in place – dazed and cross eyed as he clings - sweaty, sinuous, satisfied and apparently on another fucking planet for all that he was paying attention.

“Did you seriously just bite me?!” Hades croaks incredulously. “Jaf- Jafar, what the fuck-”

Muffled groans and what sound like an aborted reply leak between wet flesh. Hades winces as he tries to pry the sorcerers head away but finds him all but locked into the muscle – golden ichor dribbling between them. Despite the sudden burst of flame all the sorcerer does is grip harder, tongue idly flicking at the blood as it dribbles down his skin and smears the sheets.

Facilier stumbles up, nursing a bruised backside and scowling - swatting at Jafar to move but only getting a strangled hiss and an unfocused red glare for his trouble. The bokor blinks, noticing the odd..smooth sheen of Jafars skin, and the subtle red and black banding beginning to show.

“Ah, fuck. Is he-”

“Fanged up? No shit.” Hades hisses, feeling the two white hot, needle-like fangs twitch and flex what feels like down to his bones. “I don’t- fucking- need an anatomy discussion doc, get him off-!”

“I’m tryin-!”

Mood murdered - they attempt to wrangle the punch-drunk half-transformed sorcerer off the larger god, trading swears every time the teeth buried in his neck jostle, grimacing as Jafar swallows more and more godblood and slowly begins to giggle and produce some kind of awful hissy purr that shakes the bed and makes Hades especially regret the fireproof spells written into it.

Eventually they manage to pop Jafar’s unnervingly stretchy jaw off, tossing the ex vizier to the side while Facilier grabs rags for the bleeding and Hades glares at his lover. Slitted red eyes blink out of sync back as the half snake curls languidly in place, sleepy and pleased.

Hades scowls. “Memo to me – add a clause about biting...” He pinches his nose and sighs explosively, letting Facilier swipe at his shoulder where the wounds are already closing. “Oy, he’s such a freak.”

Facilier chuckles at that. “Yeah. An’ you like it, so what does that make you?”

“A pincusion apparently, oy-” He rolls his eyes and rubs his temples, feeling a headache coming on. “Was just starting to relax too...”

Facilier makes a sympathetic noise and throws the rag away. He slides back up, all smooth grace now that tall dark and twisted was slightly snoring. He gently cards a hand through the flames, letting them wrap around his fingers as Hades leans into the touch. “You wanna keep goin? Or leave it here? I’m game for either.”

Hades hums as he mulls it over and leans into him. Facilier’s brows pinch as he realises he’s… actually having to brace the god kinda hard. “Uh...Cher?”

Yellow eyes slowly blink open, and alarm bells start ringing as he sees just how wide the pupils are. “Hades..??”

“Faci...” He mumbles. “...have...have there always been three of you?”

The bokor feels his stomach tie into knots as he suddenly connects some dots - snapping his head around to see Jafar yawn, yellow drops of venom still clinging to his fangs.

He about launches himself out of bed – ignoring Hades sudden whine - and scrambles for his trousers, slung over the dresser. “Gotta get Ursula darlin’ - berightback-!”

[thepersonalwords]

Get up in the morning on a mission to save prospective clients from the shabby, ill-fitting, overpriced and worthless alternatives that those charlatans - who are your competition - are trying to get away with flogging them.

Chris Murray, Selling with EASE: The Four Step Sales Cycle Found in Every Successful Business Transaction

[eliserzilber]

DEAR MAN

A DBT Skill for Interpersonal Effectiveness

Use this skill to help you get what you need without damaging relationships or compromising your integrity.

Describe: State the facts of the situation.

Express: Use I-statements to express your feelings and take responsibility for them. I-statements prevent the other person from getting defensive.

Assert: Assert yourself by asking for what you need or by saying no firmly. Speak simply and clearly.

Reinforce: Make sure the other person knows what they will gain by granting your request. It’s important to reinforce that the relationship is a two-way street.

(Stay) Mindful: Stay focused on the conversion. If the person starts getting defensive, keep the conversation on track.

Appear Confident: Regardless of how you feel on the inside, project confidence with your body language; stand or sit up straight with your head held high, voice clear and strong, and make eye contact.

Negotiate: If the person isn’t on board with your request, remember that you are asking for something, not making demands. Modify your request to make it more appealing to them, and/or try asking them their thoughts on solving the problem together.

*More DBT guides here*

[overchromatic]

CHARACTER COMMISSIONS ARE OPEN!!!

I'm hella broke and could always use some extra cash so commissioning me would be much appreciated!

I'm liazrad on cashapp, venmo, ko-fi, and paypal.

If you're interested DM me!

[pinktinselmonstrosity]

alright i have a mild dilemna that i need advice on

on my course we have to post these weekly self-reflection things responding to the themes of the week's class and some questions about it. i posted last week's and yesterday the course convenor replied to it in a way that implies i was wrong (in my SELF reflection) and just generally misunderstands my point/takes it in bad faith. i've shown these posts to others on the course and they agree that my original post adressed the things her reply asks about and that she has misinterpreted me, in quite a "cheeky" way

my issue now is: do i reply and try to explain myself better? or is it better to just let it go?

i don't want to dig myself in deeper if she's really opposed to my viewpoint, but at the same time i do feel like i answered the questions thoroughly in the first place and the things she's accusing me of aren't fair

[sergeifyodorov]

saw someone predicting jts next contract 9m aav... girl you know nothing he's getting 7.5 at most

[faaun]

. anyway after writing the tags 4 this post i told my research partner i will no longer follow his dreams lmao. still helping w it but i need to engage in research that i find satisfying

[chirpsythismorning]

WGA Strike update as of Friday Evening

[baejax-the-great]

Admiral Hackett: Noo, Shepard, don't fly off the handle and assassinate that totally annoying warlord who just happens to have damning secrets about the Alliance! Ahahaha... Unless 😳😳😳

[skeleton-bat]

Kinda hate how people are riffing on Enchanted Portals so hard.

It was made by 2 people with zero funds who just loved cuphead so much that they wanted to make their own game inspired by it. It's the literal definition of a passion project and people are shitting and spiting on it.

The fact they even finished it and released it at all is much more than any of us ever could. And the hypocrisy of people saying they want more games or people making games who actually care and are passionate and than there's these 2 people trying their best with literal dirt and people trip them, kick them while they're down, and go haha.

Make your own game with no money and than well talk.

[thepersonalwords]

If you sound like a contestant from The Apprentice or if the customer believes that they are being sold AT, you have already failed.

Chris Murray, Selling with EASE: The Four Step Sales Cycle Found in Every Successful Business Transaction

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Strong feelings right now about a lot of things and I'm simply not going to talk openly about most of them at the moment because I don't have the capacity to do so in a way that feels safe and helpful for me.

But here's what I will say.

As both a mental health care provider responsible for the process of diagnosis and a patient of mental health care providers, can I just emphasize that the first time your patient finds out a diagnosis has been added to their record should never ever be because they looked at their portal after the appointment concluded.

I had a psych session with a new provider (this info is critical because this man has interacted with me for all of 45 minutes total) and at no point during our session did he give me ANY indication that he intended to alter my diagnostic profile or adjust my treatment plan.

Nonetheless, he did so. With an extremely stigmatized diagnosis that has a high risk of doing harm to me in a medical setting.

This is irresponsible for a number of reasons. The first is simply that if he had told me he was considering the possibility we could have discussed it and I could have provided additional context that might (would) have indicated a differential diagnosis. At minimum I would have had warning that I might need to prep for or even contest the diagnosis. The second irresponsible aspect is that I have an extensive history of medical trauma which HE WOULD KNOW if he'd spoken to the intake provider or the therapist who I work with at the practice, both of whom have met with me for longer than he has. And by issuing me this diagnosis he has just increased my risk for further medical trauma while upholding my PTSD diagnosis and being fully aware my PTSD is severe enough I am housebound without a service dog at present.

I meet with my therapist today and license wise she doesn't have the capacity to overturn what he's done but she can help advocate for me, so that's what I'm going to have to hope for. But either way I'm frustrated. Because UNDOING a diagnosis is SO MUCH WORSE than preventing it from going on a record unnecessarily in the first place. It's not even like he had no other diagnosis to treat me under. He could easily have included in his documentation that he wanted to continue to assess for the possibility of it without including it as a diagnosed and confirmed conclusion.

Diagnosis isn't a fucking joke. And we shouldn't be passing them out, particularly stigmatized ones, without an adequate conversation with the patient about where it's coming from and why it's happening. In my case, I am exceptionally confident the diagnosis is wrong. But even if it weren't, I deserved to be told to my face and not to find out after the fact through my diagnostic chart on the portal. That's cowardly and unethical, and frankly I have very little respect for a clinician who does it.

[dutybcrne]

Albedo cannot get drunk on alcohol whatsoever. The only thing that really does work for him is neurotoxins.