#edit: I SAID I WOULD HATE TO BREAK IT TWICE

[brown-little-robin]

the main problem with changing my url is that it would break my fanfiction links. my Strange Redemption fanfic is on this tumblr and I would hate to break it; the experience of clicking "next chapter" on a clunky website is so dear and precious, I would hate to break it :{

[kaysungshine]

Redamancy: Part II ['red-a-man-sE] noun ;a love returned in full

(If you haven't read part one, you definitely should!)

{ Pairing } - idol!bangchan x staff!afab.reader (bestie!jisung)

{ Genre } - NSFW; s/a/f trifecta, now friends to enemies to lovers, pining

{ Synopsis } - Things are awkward now, you're avoiding each other. In fact you distanced yourself from the entire group. What happens when Ji confronts you? What happens when Chan does a 180 and tries to befriend you? And what happens when Chan finally has you alone in his room?

{ WC } - 14.3k (I am so sorry 🥺) + 2 screenshots

{ Warnings & Tags } - 18+ MDNI, lowkey POV switch , lots and lots of angst, eventual smut & fluff, swearing, use of babygirl, multiple nicknames for members, choking, drinking, bestie jisung crying, hyunjin being a logical romantic, y/n being a little toxic but learning from it, they're honestly both a lotta stupid, oral(f. receiving), dry humping, hickeys and bruising, questionable breath play (please research if you plan on doing this, do it safely), chans nipples are sensitive, he's just sensitive in general with y/n, fingering, needy chan, members teasing, talk of edging, talk of bdsm, these two are VOCAL as hell, so lots of moaning, groaning, whining, whimpering, mewling, and dirty talk during sex, unprotected sex (piv), pull out method (again don't do this, practise safe sex), much cringe, much awkward, but they overcome it (LMK if I forgot any, I'm sorry)

{ Disclaimer } - This work is in no way associated or depicting the actual life of the members of SKZ. It is a fictional piece of work, and I do not own Stray Kids. All works of fiction are loosely inspired by SKZ, and in no way am I saying it is true to their character.

{ A/N } - Alright almost a month later, and I finally finished part two!! Please don't hate meeee, I beg your forgiveness, please. It took me a while because I just couldn't stop writing and adding things. Editing also took FOREVER, because I wasn't confident that it would satisfy you guys. I'm still not sure. So I apologize if this didn't live up to your expectations, again, please be gentle with me ♡. Understand that this is only my 2nd SKZ fic, so I'm still learning about how to portray each character, and how to piece things together seamlessly!

Chan was starting to worry. It had been almost two weeks and he still hadn't seen you, nor heard from you. It wasn't like you two really spoke outside of questioning the other about Jisungs' whereabouts. There were the occasional texts, again about Jisung. He didn't know what to say to you to begin with. Apologize? He already did that, and it only seemed to make you more upset. But that was in the moment, and both your emotions were on overdrive. 

The other members were starting to notice your absence, questioning Han about it. Asking if you were okay. You'd even started avoiding all the public areas at the building. No one was even sure if you were eating during the day, or there at all. You didn't go to the cafeteria, break rooms, or practise rooms. No one caught you in the lounge areas, elevator, or the stairwell. No one even saw you coming into or leaving the building. It was to the point where Hyunjin was nearly planning steakout missions with Jisung. And poor Ji. He only got to see you twice since that night. A drastic decrease in comparison to how often he usually spends time with you. Chan only knew that because he overheard him talking to Minho about it. That was all he heard before Han noticed him standing there, and left for his room, sending him a spine chilling glare along the way. 

And Chan knew it really was all his fault when Minho just gave him a curiously sad look, and patted him on the shoulder. You obviously said something to Han, who said something to Minho. He wonders who else knows how bad he messed up. 

He was racking his brain trying to figure out how to fix this. Never in a million years had he thought he'd actually get a chance to experience such a quintessential moment with you. He'd liked you for so long, it was starting to turn into more than that. Ever since he'd seen you helping a new trainee navigate the building, he grew interested in your kind heart first and foremost. He's sure he's been through all the emotions. Excitement, because you started hanging around with them and you fell right into the dynamic so easily. Anxiety, because he didn't know how to approach you at first. Jealousy, when Han got all of the attention from you. Anger, when he thought you and Han started dating secretly. Embarrassment, when he realized how wrong he was. Hope, when you two shared a hug, even though it was a very awkward hug. Despondent, when he still couldn't figure out how to act around you, letting whatever growing friendship you two had begun, stall. And now regretful. But not regret for kissing you, touching you, or nearly fucking you. No, regret that he had stopped. 

Such a beautiful moment, where he was truly lost in bliss. And he halted it. He let his anxiety get to him, his internal conflict wouldn't shut up.

He truly was worried about the technicality of it all. The rules, the company, the media, the fans. Worst of all, you would receive the brunt of it. He didn't know how to protect you from it all. He was constantly going back and forth in his head. How could he make it work? Would you even want to make it work? Did you even like him? What did you think about him exactly? 

He wasn't blind. Every once in a while he'd catch your eyes on him for a little too long. Any 'accidental' physical contact you had with him would linger. And he knew there was a certain smile you'd reserved just for him. Not to mention, you were always the first to reach out directly, and make conversation with him. He was always too afraid to. He felt like a coward. And when he finally had the courage to make a move, a bold move, a ravenous move... His ego suddenly deflated when he realized his actions could be taken the wrong way.

He panicked.

He doesn't want you to think that he just wants sex from you. That you're just a fling. A one night stand. A hookup. No he wanted to do it the right way. He wanted to take you on a date, he wanted to learn more about you, to meet your friends. He wanted you to meet his family, to meet Berry. He even fantasized about planning a special date to ask you to be his girlfriend. He fantasized about anniversaries, about holidays spent together, a life spent together. He wanted to give you the world. He fell for you hard. And in that moment, he felt like he was doing it all backwards. So he stopped. It nearly killed him, but he stopped. And he should've done anything, quite literally anything else but stop.

When he saw the spark in your eyes dimming, only to be replaced with apprehension. He immediately apologized, and spat out a quick blurb about being inappropriate. 

Your entire face just sunk, and he shut down. There was nothing more he could say about it, not in that moment. And he felt even worse when you said you understood, but he didn't let it show. You didn't understand, not really. There was no way in hell you could, and he desperately wanted to just spill everything that second. But he wanted to be sober, wanted you to be sober, so instead he told you to drink water. And go to bed. 

What the hell was wrong with him. 

He even made sure to wake up early the next morning, anticipating to somehow get the chance to talk to you. When you came running down the hall, he was sure that it was fate. The chance that you two had alone time this early was perfect. He had hoped that this would all be sorted out. If he confessed, maybe you would too. Then he could explain last night, and you two could talk about it. And if it didn't work out like that, at the very least he could try to preserve your friendship. It would be painful to remain just friends, but he didn't want you out of his life. He couldn't imagine that. He doesn’t think he could handle that. After he greeted you, he noticed your eyes had tears in them. You were starting to hyperventilate, and tremble. 

Then you were leaving. 

Even though he's come up with world class lyrics, he seemed to be failing with his words lately. He didn't ask if you were okay, or what was wrong, or breach the topic that was clearly needing clarification. No, instead, he followed up with asking if you wanted breakfast. 

You didn't even look at him. The tone of your voice was glacial, freezing him right to the spot. He'd never heard you sound like that. He just stood there, watching the door close. Listening to your car start, listening to you drive off. And then he stood there more, afraid to move. 

When Jisung came running out 15 minutes later, he was still standing there. Han saw your things were gone, and knew that you left. Chan only decided to move when Han uttered five angry words to him. 

'You really fucked up, Chan.'

He knew he did. And he didn't know where to begin to fix it...

"--Channie-hyung!" 

He whipped his head up, and found Jeongin snapping his fingers in front of face, trying to get his attention. 

They'd been at dance practice, taking a break. He only then realized that he'd zoned out the entire time, not eating, not grabbing water, not even sitting down. Just recounting his mistakes, and dwelling on them. Now it was time to get back to work. 

Jeongin was giving him a strange look, but he didn't dare question him. In addition to messing things up with you, he'd been too on edge. Snapping at one too many people. He didn't want to risk Chan blowing up on him next.

"Where's Hannie and Hyune?" Chan questions.

"Probably still in the cafeteria..." Minho responds, giving him a knowing look. 

Minho was the one keeping both him and Han in check at the moment. He felt bad for forcing him into a position like that, considering he was Chan's younger member. Even if it's just one year. Having to be a mediator daily between his two brothers, he knew it must've taken a toll on him. But he never complained, and Chan was grateful nonetheless. 

Chan nodded, and went to grab water from his bag. As he was chugging it, Jisung came into the room and went straight to Minho. Furiously whispering at him, pushing his hair back. Hyunjin trailed in not long after, his eyes darted to Chan, but looked away quickly. 

"What's going on?" Seungmin asked.

Minho just put his hand up to him, and the younger one scoffed. He turned to Felix, "The hyungs are acting fucking weird lately." 

Felix hummed in agreement, as he continued massaging Changbin. 

"Aye, I don't know what's going on either, don't group me in." Changbin grunted.

Chan hesitantly approached the bickering pair, and the look Minho now gave him was one of warning. But it was too late. 

"It's all your fault." Han spat at him. 

"Excuse me?" He bit back, not expecting such an outburst from him.

Hyunjin quickly jumped up to try and get between them and explain, "We saw y/n in the cafeteria toda-"

"She isn't coming over this weekend again. And she's not letting me over to hers either. She wants to be alone. I wonder why." Han interrupts, crossing his arms.

The room was eerily quiet. Everyone knew something was up, that much was obvious. The fact that Han was slightly vague though, it gives Chan the idea that the exact details remain relatively private. 

"Is she still here?" Chan whispers through clenched teeth, holding fierce eye contact with Han, but he's getting more daring.

"She's about to leave. YOU," Han pointed to Chan, poking his finger right into his chest, "need to figure your shit out, and stop playing around. Fix. It."

"HAN JISUNG." Minho yells sternly, "You need to stop being so disrespectful. No matter the situation, remember who you're talking to. Let's take a walk." 

He drags Han out of the room, and down the hall.

Chan was left standing there, ears burning and fists trembling at his sides. It was safe to say practice was done early for the day. So he quickly dismissed everyone, and was the first to leave.

He found himself searching for you throughout the building, with no luck. Until the elevator doors opened, he stepped on with his head hung down. So consumed in his own thoughts again, he didn't realize the other person at first. 

When he lifted his head to finally greet them, he was faced with you. You refused to even look at his way, choosing to face straight forward at the exit. 

"Y/n..." He managed to croak out, weakly. 

Silence, still. As soon as the doors opened, you rushed out. He was stuck standing there again. 

It was early Friday night, and you were already wrapped in the blankets on your bed. Aimlessly scrolling and tapping on tiktok, not even really paying attention to any of the videos. 

You weren't used to spending this much time alone, not anymore. You wanted to go see the people who you realized felt like home to you, especially in this foreign country. But you didn't want to deal with the fallout of the oldest. Jiji did beg to come over... You'd been missing him so much. You'd been missing everyone so much, even your co-workers.

Most of the work you do can be done from home, on your personal pc or work laptop. The majority of your co-workers had periods of time where they wouldn't set foot into the building for weeks at a time. You knew it wouldn't be weird to them if you worked from home for a while. So you've been opting to do that, only going into the building if you absolutely needed to.

Until today that is. At nearly 4 in the morning you were cc'd on multiple emails. The constant dinging woke you up. There was a huge issue with a group's new M/V. Footage was corrupted, drafts were deleted, and it had already passed the deadline. They needed all hands on deck. You were in such a rush to come in, you didn't bring any food or drinks with you. You had arrived about an hour after receiving the email, so by the time afternoon rolled around, you needed to get something in your system. Thankfully the major issues had been solved, but now came the fine tuning. You could finish up at home, but truthfully you missed being out and about. Even if it was just at work.

You reluctantly made your way down to the cafeteria, thinking you'd be safe because you know SKZ's schedule for today. You knew they'd be in dance practice. Oh how surprised you were when Jisung nearly tackled you to the ground. He was on you as soon as you came down the stairs to the main level. Your heart hurts when you see the glossy look in his eyes, paired with sadness. Hyunjin was right next to him, trying to pry him off of you and avoid a scene. Instead you pulled him into a group hug, which he eventually accepted, wrapping his arms around the both of you. 

They both badgered you with questions. Asking where you'd been, what happened, if you were mad at them. You were honest with them, and nearly broke down again. You weren't okay. You were hurt, and angry. But you assured them that you weren't angry with any of them, besides one obviously. And even though Jiji didn't bring up Chan exactly, or that night, you did. You started ranting about how stupid you felt for what happened. You've been holding it all in for the longest time, the words were rolling off your tongue effortlessly. 

You could see that at first, Hyunjin was a little shocked and confused. Possibly embarrassed judging by his pink tinted cheeks. But he held your other hand, that Ji wasn't holding, supporting you either way. You couldn't begin to express your appreciation. You'd half expected all the members to know exactly what happened. You also figured they'd side with Chan, and be upset at you for cutting off all contact basically. Considering Hyunjin didn't know what happened, you knew that wasn't the case. Relief washed over you slightly. 

It would be better if less people knew, less people to pick sides. In the grand scheme of things, this was only really between two people. There was no need to involve anyone else directly. On top of that, you'd never ask any of them to pick your side, not only because you know where you'd stand compared to their leader. You also wanted to avoid negative drama, and any arguments that might start with them.

Jisung begged you to come over tonight. Said that they would figure it out, that he would take you to his room even. He tried to make you laugh saying he'd even hang a sign saying 'no Chan's allowed' on his door. But you refused, not wanting to create uneasy tension, or make anyone feel uncomfortable in their own home. 

He then offered to come over and have a night just the two of you, and as tempting as it was, you found yourself wanting to be alone. Your go to method for self soothing was always solitude, even if it wasn't always healthy. 

You could see him deflating the more you denied his offers to spend time together. The anxiety was growing in his eyes. Knowing him, he was fearing that this was the end of your friendship. That simply could never happen.

'Give me just a few more days, and I'll be over it all. I'll be back to normal.'

That's what you told him, but you didn't even know if that was true. Regardless, you refused to lose your best friend over a situation like this.

One thing's for sure, you need to stop isolating. It wasn't helping as much as you convinced yourself it would. Just as you were debating texting Ji that you changed your mind, and to come over. Your phone chimed, and it was Jiji, he texted you first.

You threw the blankets off, opting to keep on your pajama shorts instead of changing. You slid a hoodie on over your cami though, because you refused to put a bra on. 

They're your friends and you know they'd never judge you or your home. Still you tidied up the take out containers, cups, and cans left in your kitchen and living room. You folded your throw blankets, and fluffed up the pillows on your couch. You quickly picked up the clothes strewn across your apartment, and threw them into your room. You'd deal with the laundry later. Lastly, you went to take the garbage out, and as you turned to go back inside, a car drove up and Ji hopped out. He was in a hoodie, with the hood pulled up. He also wore sunglasses, and a black mask. 

"Y/nie!" Ji said and ran up to hug you.

"Long time no see." You joke, wrapping your arms around him. 

Hyunjin was also semi disguising himself, also in a hoodie. He had a baseball cap on, with his hood also up. He covered his eyes with the visor, and wore a black mask as well. He sent off the driver with a thank you and wave.

"Don't tease. It's been an excruciating amount of time. I need to recharge." He said squeezing you tighter.

"Hey y/n." Hyunjin walked up next, carrying bags full of goodies. 

"Hey! Come on, give me those, let's get inside." 

After you lead them in, you guys get comfy in the living room. They brought drinks, and loads of snacks and candy. In no time, you fell into that familiar and comfortable groove of your usual weekend shenanigans. Just a smaller circle this time.

"So," Ji started with his cheeks full of cheesecake, "I got in trouble with Minho." 

"How?!" You giggled. 

"I think Minho saved you actually, the way Chan was looking at you? He needed to get you out of there, you were NOT giving it up." Hyune said. 

"Wait, what happened?" You sat up more, worried now. 

"Tchh, he wouldn't have laid a finger on me." He tried to act confidently, but the way he rubbed his hands together told a different story.

"You guys fought?!" You gasped.

When Ji said nothing, and avoided your eyes, Hyune decided to speak up.

"They've been fighting. Mostly silently. You know, avoiding each other, sending the other looks and glares. But some days Hannie can't keep his mouth shut."

You gave Ji a stern look, and he just swallowed his cake.

"Anyways," Ji said, clearly trying to get the subject off of Chan, "Minho was so angry with me. I got scolded so much, I nearly cried."

"Well, yelling at Chan in front of the entire group probably wasn't the smartest thing to do..." Hyune mumbled.

Suddenly, concern washed over you. Surprisingly for Chan. You couldn't help it when the words just slipped out.

"So... how is Chan?" You attempted to sound nonchalant, stuffing your mouth with a brownie immediately afterwards.

They were both staring at you, unsure of how to answer. 

"He's... tense. I get something clearly happened between you two, but I don't know exactly what's up. He seems angry, and lashes out at people verbally... But he's sad too, he's been attempting to hide away from everyone too." Hyune says. 

"He has no reason to be angry." Ji snaps.

"Ji..." You say, "You should stop being so hostile to him. He didn't do anything to you..." 

Damn that soft spot in your heart, even when you've been completely devastated by him, you're sitting here defending him. 

He gave you the stern look now, "No. But he did something to hurt you. He's acting like a god damn fuck boy, and I always knew him to be better than that. I've never seen you like this! He made you stop visiting us, you even stopped talking to me throughout the day. He created a divide. And I'm sorry to be selfish, but whether or not it was done to me, it still affected me too!"

The anguish in his voice shot through your chest, creating that god awful sinking feeling. He was right, but still... it wasn't only Chan that held the blame. You were guilty of your own actions. You never should've pushed any of them away, especially Hanji.

"Okay, I have to ask. What the hell happened, it seems like he did something really bad." Hyunjin finally asked, worry written all over his face.

Ji refused to look up from his cheesecake, he was now just mashing it up angrily on his plate. 

"I like Chan." You blurted out, "Well, I liked him. I still like him? I'm trying to get over him though. But it's proving to be more difficult than I thought, so maybe it's more than me just having a crush. I don't know. It feels ridiculous to have such big emotions towards him, considering we struggle to even hold a conversation. I know nothing substantial about him, and I'm sure it's vice-versa. But the last time I was over... We ended up... halfway hooking up in the hall? But he stopped. And he looked at me like I was crazy. Like he forgot who I was, and like... like he was disgusted that it was me he was touching." You started rambling now. 

"And I mean I get it. I'm me, nothing special. We were drunk, and I'm sure with the way we were feeling, it could've just been chalked up to hormones on overdrive. But... I really thought he was reciprocating my feelings. I feel so stupid, to put that much value into sex. It's just sex. And it didn't even happen! I don't know. It just hurt, it still hurts. The regret in his eyes, that stung so bad. Because I didn't regret it, fuck, I don't regret it... I'm just so angry. I can't seem to move on from this."

They both sat listening to you, as tears began to well in your eyes. Ji pulled you into him, your head resting on his chest. Your arm rested on top of his stomach, the other sliding between his back and the couch. He was carding his fingers through your hair, and scratching your scalp lightly, like he knew you liked.

"Stop talking down on yourself. I don't like seeing you tear yourself down with lies." Ji mumbled.

"I'm sorry you're going through this... Have you two... talked at all?" Hyunjin asked.

"No. I'm trying to avoid that. I already got my heart ripped out once, I don't want to go through it again." You nearly sobbed, thinking back to how he approached you in the elevator. All he said was your name, but his voice was filled with such strong emotions that you couldn't decipher. You'd just assumed it was still regret, and ran out of there as fast as you could. 

Hyunjin rubbed your knee comfortingly, "But maybe talking would help... I'm not trying to make excuses for him. He should've spoken up at that point, offered some sort of explanation or reassurance, something. That's on him for not opening his mouth, you'd obviously be confused about the whole thing. I don't know if you're interested in fixing things and talking it out, or even remaining friends with him. Regardless, I feel like some sort of closure would help you and help him. And unfortunately that does involve talking it out."

You nodded your head, "It probably would, but I don't feel like I'm ready. You didn't see his eyes. I can't handle it if he looks at me like that again." You whispered the next sentence, "I don't want anyone to look at me that way again. "

"I don't think Chan would ever be disgusted by you, I mean judging by the looks some of us have caught him giving you. He definitely finds you attractive, as he should." He smirked, making you give a breathy laugh through the tears, "Frankly, I'm shocked that you were even interested in him. I mean have you seen me?" He gestured to his face dramatically, turning from side to side and gave a few poses.

You and Ji both chuckled at him.

 "Or Felix? Even Innie lately is growing more into his features! Why not one of us?!" He nudged your leg with a laugh.

"HEY! If anyone gets to date my Jagi, it's obviously me. We'll be two hot, married best friends who suffer in abstinence, because we can't bring ourselves to consummate the marriage." Ji suddenly slurs, holding onto you tighter. 

Yeah, he was a little too quiet there for too long, the alcohol must've hit him.

You burst out laughing, and shove him away from you, "Gross Jiji!" 

"And thank you Hyune, but I feel like that can't be true. Even if he has checked me out, that's superficial. I mean we're human, we can feel a basic level of attraction to someone we see for only 2 seconds, and never get to see them again. When I say I like him, it's more than just a physical relationship. I know it's illogical, for so many reasons. Like I said, I barely even know him. There's been no attempt to even get on the same level, like how I know the rest of you. We barely talked, we had that huge argument, and he's always kept some distance from me... there's always been a detachment. So for me to want to be with him, even after all the signs of him wanting nothing to do with me? It's insane. He could never want that, could never want me. Not beyond a quick fuck apparently. And he couldn't even go through with that..."

You know you're starting to sound repetitive and bitter, and a little pathetic. But damn it, this hurts. And these thoughts were consuming your mind in a vicious continual cycle. 

Hyunjin just hummed, neither agreeing or disagreeing, "You know you can't help emotions y/n, they're borderline instinctual. Especially love, and I'm not saying you're in love with him, but to care for someone? That passion? It's got to count for some kind of love. It's such a powerful feeling, we have no control over it, it's humorlessly funny like that." 

You were listening to him talk intently, he was so poetic. Maybe it was the fact you were a little tipsy, but you were thinking that he should write more songs. More love songs specifically. 

"If we could control it, there'd be much less heartbreak in the world I think. Unrequited love wouldn't exist... With that in mind though, there'd be a lot less love overall. I mean think about it, love almost always comes with some sort of eventual pain. There'd be many people who'd just opt out altogether..." He paused for a moment before continuing, "And never discount things as impossible, everything is possible. I'm not saying this to try to give you hope or destroy your hope. I'm not saying this to persuade you either. I'm just saying sometimes things aren't so black and white. Grey exists too, and it's a pretty beautiful shade if you ask me. I think you should talk to him about it." He finished

You nodded and offered a smile, "Maybe I should, and thank you."

You gestured for him to join you and Ji on the couch, and he rested against you. His head on your shoulder, creating a momentary cuddle pile, with you sandwiched in the middle.

You were so grateful to these boys, helping to piece you back together when you felt so broken. And over something seemingly insignificant to most. Ji was physically comforting you, and Hyune was comforting you mentally and emotionally. He just seemed to understand the world on a different level, able to see perspectives that might not always be clear to most. His mind was a beautiful place, and you felt honored that he let you in. You both formed a special bond tonight, similar yet completely different to you and Ji.

And, oh Ji... he wasn't getting off scot free.

"And you," You looked up to Ji, who was looking down at you wide eyed, "You need to apologize for your behavior with Chan. I understand you want to protect me, and I love you for that. Immensely. But he's your leader. He's done and sacrificed so much for you and your members. I'm sure no one knows what's going through his head. Stop giving him such a hard time... I'll figure out a solution with him eventually... even if it's just practicing being civil with each other. For now, try not to take things out on him. I'm sorry I stopped coming around. That fault lies completely on me, and it was petty. I won't avoid anyone anymore, so promise me you'll apologize. And that means as soon as you see him!"

He looked at you, processing your words before answering, "...fine. But seriously... don't go dark on me again, Jagiya." He said quietly. 

You smiled, and snuggled up closer to him, "I won't, my poor baby."

The three of you continued chatting, catching up on all the crazy things you missed out on. Apparently a lot can happen in two weeks. You were angry you missed out on a weekend camping trip. Apparently they all had gotten so drunk, except Chan. And I.N. kept threatening to hit people with his shoe. They informed you that Chan was very quiet on the trip. He kept to himself mostly, and binge ate ice cream instead of sharing a drink with the rest. 

You couldn't get your mind off Hyunjin's words. Chan has been watching you? The amount of time you spent checking him out, you'd figured if that were true you would have noticed. Maybe he was sneakier than you thought. Then again, that night your eyes did meet more than once or twice... You kept catching him looking at you. Maybe what Hyune said was true.

You were stuffed, full of candy and sweets. And also a little tipsy. It was getting late. Close to an hour later, you sent them home in a rideshare, telling them both to text you when they get home. Then you made sure to text Minho, alerting him of exactly how drunk Han was, and apologizing. You knew he'd be the one stuck taking care of him, if there's anyone who loves Ji as much as you, it's Minho. He might love him even more, having known him for much longer than you did. If the boys didn't have such a busy schedule this week, you'd be able to have Ji and Jinnie spend the night and take care of them yourself. 

A weight was lifted off your shoulders, and you silently cursed yourself for hiding yourself away for so long. You always did that, and it never ended well. You really were thankful to Ji, you don't know what you'd do without him.

That night, you felt yourself drifting off to sleep quicker, easier. But even as slumber was pulling you in, Chan was still on your mind. 

Chan was sitting on the couch with Minho, having been forced out of his room and pushed to socialize. He hadn't done much, he was in his thoughts again. Occasionally entertaining the others with curt responses and short conversations here and there. They seemed to just be happy with his presence, and he was thankful for that.

Jisung and Hyunjin had gone to your house, and the unknown made him feel uneasy. He was happy though, because that meant you weren't cutting everyone off, you weren't done with the entire group, you were staying in their lives.

Everyone but the man that fucked up it would seem. Still, he felt relief. He wouldn't forgive himself if he was the cause of a valuable friendship lost for everyone.

The rest of the members had gone to sleep by now, but he and Minho were waiting for the two younger members to arrive home. You had texted Minho saying they were on their way back, and to take care of them as they were drunk. Jisung especially. 

He was wondering what was taking them so long, and he could tell Minho had some worry too. His leg shaking up and down. Then, as if on cue, Hyunjin bursts through the door. He has Hannie in his grasp, pulling him along as he tries to resist entering the dorm.

Hyune mumbled, "C'mon. You promised her." 

He started to feel flushed, and hot. What does that mean?

He gave Hannie a push towards Chan, and Minho gave a worried look to both of them. He was expecting the worst. Jisung was staring at his feet, playing with his fingers and biting his lip. 

Chan didn't think he could feel more disheartened than he already was, but it was apparently possible. Staring at Hannie in front of him, he looked so defeated. What had happened at your house?

Finally he looked up to Chan. And Chan was sure his face mirrored the younger ones anxiety. 

Then Han started tearing up, "I'm sorry Channie-hyung!" He wailed, and collapsed into Chan's arms. 

Chan was shocked, but he just held him close, and softly shushed him, trying to comfort him. He was trying to offer understanding and his own apologies. But Jisung ignored it babbled on, recanting his negative actions and harsh words. Chan respected the fact that he was apologizing, but he already knew why he had said the things he said. Why he had done the things he did. In fact, he held a sense of pride towards Hanji for it. It wasn't easy for him to stand up to Chan. And while, yes, he was being inappropriate from a certain viewpoint, he expected nothing less from the boy trying to protect his best friend. He couldn't be angry with him about that fact.

If anything he just felt more guilty that he had to protect you from Chan at all.

He continued slurring, stuttering, and sniffling in between talking. His words were barely coherent at this point, but Chan did catch one sentence.

"I thought I was losing her forever because of that night..."

Chan never felt more disappointed in himself, his entire being crumpled. Not only did he hurt you, he hurt Han. He's hurt the other members who grew to care for you just as much as he did. He never intended to hurt anyone, and instead he hurt many. It was all his fault.

With the help of Minho, they dragged Han to bed. Minho stayed with him, tucking him in, then getting him water and paracetamol for the morning. Minho stated he'd be spending the night in Han's room, just in case he was going to be sick. So Chan went out to check on Hyunjin, hoping he wasn't as inebriated but expecting as much. He found him in the kitchen, a bottle of water in one hand and a chip bag in the other.

"You feeling okay, Hyunjin?"

"Yeah, I didn't have as much as Han did..." He trailed off, "Neither did y/n." He was eyeing Chan as he continued, a glint in his eye while he said it.

Chan just nodded and kept silent, knowing he was trying to get at something. And it didn't feel like it was anything but teasing. Hyunjin wasn't having that though, he never did when people ignored what he had to say.

"Y/n made Han apologize you know," He started as he opened his chips, "I mean we both know he would've eventually. But she made him promise he would apologize as soon as he saw you."

That piqued his interest somewhat. He didn't view you as a mean person, but he figured you wouldn't mind seeing him distressed due to Han. In fact when he was standing in front of him, he was sure that he was about to get cussed out. By order of you, maybe. Considering Hyune said that Han promised you something. He wouldn't blame you, he deserved it after all.

But no. You were continuing to be your kind and sweet self. Even towards the person who upset you. He was confused.

"Why?" Chan finally whispered, more to himself than Hyune. 

"I believe her words were, 'he's done and sacrificed so much for you' and 'no one knows what's going through his head'. So she suggested that he, well more like intimidated him, to apologize." He said while dipping his hand into the bag of chips, "It was cute, really. She was almost... protective." 

With that he popped a chip in his mouth, and went off to bed, leaving Chan dumbstruck in the kitchen yet again.

His heart was thumping in his ears, unsure of how to interpret those words. But they meant something, right? Hyunjin was a tease, sure, but he must know what happened. He wasn't just teasing about this? Surely he wouldn’t go to that extent.

'No one knows what's going through his head.' 

You were right. No one knows. You don't know. He needed to talk to you, he needed to let you know. He needed to let you in, even if it was hard.

Suddenly he felt hope again. It was small and shriveled, but alive. He was sure with enough care and nourishment, something precious could bloom from it. 

The week flew by, and now it was nearing the weekend again. Things almost felt normal. You had returned to the office regularly, no longer working from home. Your time with Ji had gone back to normal, Jinnie often tagging along now. And the other members were glad you had started showing up again too. Everyone was excited to recommence the late night antics at their dorm tonight.

You couldn't help but notice Chan seemed relieved too, a little too relieved. Even though you clearly gave him the cold shoulder. It didn't seem to bother him. You obviously have an idea of why his attitude towards you changed drastically, but what you don't have an idea of is what his goal is. You can't necessarily say he's acting as if nothing had happened anymore, because of his new demeanors. But he still hasn't mentioned anything to you directly. His gall was starting to irritate you. His mixed signals were angering you. 

If you were to think logically and assume, maybe in his head, he had been attempting some sort of effort to 'fix' things. But you tried to shut it down every single time, still unsure of his reasoning. Because he still never brought up that night, and was acting as if nothing happened at all. As if his reasoning for trying to be more friendly didn't exist. It was ridiculous. 

Before that night, it was always you making sure to greet him first, you striking up small talk, you trying to crack jokes with him. All small and simple gestures, but gestures nonetheless. If only to keep things polite and civil. The tables seemed to have turned, and now he was initiating it all. In front of others you were short with him, but made sure to still be polite. There was a deeper detachment than before, and it didn't go unnoticed by the others either. Though they kept their mouths shut, only eyeing the interactions between you two. 

In your head you figured that he'd get the hint and stop trying so hard at whatever it was he was trying at. You hoped it would trigger a conversation about that night finally. It got to the point where it started to create an awkward vibe in the presence of the others. But no, he still wouldn't stop. He just amped it up, and now the dynamic was once again changing. 

He'd figured out the exact times you would take your breaks, and would manage to catch you before anyone else could. When you stepped off the elevator, he'd be waiting for you with a smile, and offer to buy you a snack. You'd decline, instead opting to take a small walk and stretch your legs. When you get back to your desk you'd find your favorite cookies on them, or your favorite candy bar, or your favorite drink from the vending machine. They were always wrapped nicely or bagged with a bow, with a note attached. It usually reads something like, 'don't forget to eat today! --Channie'. 

You would always hand them out to your co-workers, or offer the singular items to your office bestie, before crumpling the note and throwing it out. 

He'd taken to somehow always being there to hold a door open for you. Or trying to hold your bags when he caught you using the stairs instead of the elevator, actively trying to avoid him. Or when you were helping staff move the camera equipment from room to room, he'd try to take the load off your hands. It always ended in you snapping at him in a whisper. And him furrowing his brows like he didn't understand what he did wrong.

It's not that his actions were wrong, actually. They were the opposite, but why? Why was he doing all this, when he never did before. He was putting all this effort into acts of service, when all you wanted to do was talk. It was hard for you to bring it up, especially when he was acting so sweet yet pissing you off at the same time. 

You should've realized it'd be hard for him to bring it up too, but you didn't. Because of that, there was the Wednesday incident. 

You were heading home for the day, not having had a run in with Chan all day, and unsure how to feel about it. You were almost out the door when you heard heavy footsteps coming towards you from across the lobby, and your stomach twisted. 

Chan.

"Hey! Wait!" He said with a smile, "I'll walk you to your car." 

You'd had enough at that point. You rolled your eyes, and continued out the door. But you knew he'd catch up anyways. 

As his pace aligned with yours, he kept talking, "Sorry I couldn't catch you at all today, it was a busy one. It still is, I think I'll be stuck in the studio all night. Han too, we finally figured out the ho--"

"Chan!" You cut him off, "Really? What makes you think I'm in the mood to talk to you? What makes you think I was waiting for your presence at all? You don't need to apologize for being busy. We're at work. We're working. It's what we do." You spat out, more abrasive than you've ever been to him. 

He looked at you wide eyed, and you felt something akin to guilt pang in your chest. Immediately you ignored it, and kept walking. Only for him to latch onto your arm gently. 

"I don't understand." He said, discouragement lacing his voice. "I'm trying to... trying to--" 

"Trying to what? What exactly is it that you're trying to do? Because I can't figure it out. You're being so hot and cold, you went from one extreme to the other. I don't know how to decipher that."

"I just want things to go back to being okay again! I want us to be normal again." He said exasperated. 

"Okay?!" You chuckled, "Normal? Our normal was borderline avoiding each other, which I am keeping up with very well, thank you. Our normal was talking to each other out of necessity. Our normal was little to no interaction, unless we're in a group. Whatever you're trying at, it's not our normal!" You shouted.

"No, what I mean is-" but you cut him off again, too heated to think logically.

"Our normal definitely didn't include me against a wall, and your fingers inside me and around my throat. THAT is not our normal. And I know it made things uncomfortable. And I know you regret it. But how can you expect things to go back to being whatever you think 'okay' is, if we haven't even talked about it?" You took a second to suck air into your lungs that seemed to be burning with rage. 

"Instead you talk to me like that night never happened, and then you behave as if we've been best friends forever. You act as if that behavior, whatever your reason for it, isn't influenced by that night. You talk to me about things we never talked about before. We never caught up on how each other's day was, we never checked in with each other to make sure the other ate, we never took breaks together to get coffee or a snack and chat. You're expecting me to be the same as you, and ignore what happened. But I can't Chan, I can't do it. All I want is closure, instead it feels almost like I'm being led on. Before that happened, I was insignificant to your life. Our only connection being Ji! Then... then in an instant everything changed and then it changed again. It's confusing Chan. I'm lost here." 

The tears were brimming in your eyes, and his ears were the brightest red you've ever seen. The flush went to his cheeks, and down his neck, and the grip he had on your arm was trembling. He started to open his mouth again, but you were quick to stop him. You felt like all he would give you right now is excuses, and you weren't ready to hear that.

"Please, Chan. I'm the one who's trying. I'm trying to move past it, like you seem to want to. But it's harder for me. When I feel like this, all I want to do is go home and hide. I can't do that though, not again. I'm trying to be civil. I'm trying to be polite, for the sake of everyone in our lives. But you keep pushing for some sort of friendship we never had..." You felt the dampness on your cheeks now, and before you knew it, your last sentence slipped through, "And did it ever occur to you that I wanted more than a simple friendship?" 

At that he let your arm fall, and he took in a shaky breath. You figured now was the time he would say something, but he seemed frozen. Then he spoke in a soft tone.

"I'm so sorry y/n, I promise I can explain..."

That was it, your heart started to ache at the thought of his words. You weren't ready to be rejected again. So you rubbed your cheeks, one at a time, swiping the tears away and sniffling. He reached towards you again, stepping closer, but you stepped back. 

"I need to go."

And you left. You got in your car, and you held it all in. The whole drive home, you refused to let yourself process any of the conversation. Which in reality was less of a conversation, and more you blowing up on Chan. 

It wasn't until you stepped through your door that you sunk to the floor, back against your front door and started sobbing. You let it all out. The guilt for yelling at him. The despair over the rejection, that never left your heart. The embarrassment over the entire situation and how you were acting. Your unjust, pure anger. It all just came out in tears. You couldn't stop them, your only focus was on breathing when you could. 

You didn't know how long you stayed like that, hugging your knees and bawling your eyes out. But the sound of keys jingling, and the pressure of the door pushing against your back, is what snapped you out of that grief stricken daze.

"Oh, Jagiya..." You registered Hans voice as you stood up to move, you forgot you gave him keys to your place.

He scooped you into his chest, squeezing you tight. You held onto him, just as firm. 

"Wait..." You were confused, Chan said they both would be late in the studio, "What are you doing here?"

He pulled back and scanned your face as you sniffled. He sighs, and leads you into your kitchen, wetting a towel and dabbing at your puffy eyes and cheeks before drying them. Once you seemed to be in a pacified state, he continued. 

"An unintelligent kangaroo I happen to know, told me I should head home early and check on you. He seems to be more intelligent than I thought." He tried to make light of the situation, but guilt bubbled up in you once again. 

"Wanna talk about what happened?" He offered. 

And so you word vomited at him. Retelling the whole scene word for word, since the words were mostly your own. He listened, nodding when necessary, and humming in agreement to some parts. When you were done, you looked at him and waited. 

He was looking down with his arms crossed, leaning against your kitchen counter. He looked deep in thought. 

"Well?" You said desperately. 

"Well, I think it's good one of you finally broke the ice on it. You got it off your chest, you said what you needed to. Yeah, maybe you were rude. But now the door to talk about it finally was opened. However, maybe you should've heard him out. Seems like he could barely get a word in edgewise. If I know you when you're angry, which I do, I know you never planned on letting him speak. You always have to have the last word, my little attack chihuahua."

Then he poked your forehead, "Stubborn. Defensive. Both of you." 

You groaned, "I know, I know. I'm already beating myself up over it." 

"When will either of you learn? You don't need to beat yourself up over it, you just need to communicate. You missed your opportunity today, but that doesn't mean all hope is lost. I know he really wants to talk to you."

"Talk again?" You scrunch your face at the idea, even while knowing it had to happen.

"Apologize, is more like it." He retorted. 

Your face dropped, but you knew he was right. 

"Hey, you made me do it. And it was the right thing to do. Like you said, no matter how angry I am, I needed to apologize. The same rules apply to you... Plus I've been hesitant to say this but..."

"What?"

"If he wanted to stop in the middle of it all, he had every right to. I know it hurts but, no means no, you know?" 

Guilt flooded your veins yet again, are you really coming across as some sort of hostile person after facing a rejection? You suppose it was half right, which made you feel disappointed in yourself. You were no better than the men who throw tantrums when women reject them. In your mind though, you were more upset at ignoring it all. 

"I know that, and currently I'm not angry because sex didn't happen. I'm angry because I don't understand why it almost happened, and I want an explanation. I just want to know why he was so cold to me the entire time before it happened, and why he tried to act like nothing happened and was friendlier to me afterwards. If he wanted to stop because he changed his mind and wasn't feeling it, that's fine. But he could've said that, I'd be hurt because I like him so much, but I'd get over it. Why I'm upset now is because I don't like the mixed signals. I don't like the unknown. I want closure."

"To get closure you have to talk to him y/n, you avoid him just as much as he used to avoid you. Now that he's stopped, you're still avoiding him. And acting kind of rude to him, we've all seen it. The fake smiles don't really hide the contempt in your eyes. You're always valid in your emotions always, but I've recently learned that it's the reaction that you are held responsible for. That goes for him too, even though his reactions may not be as hostile as yours. His reaction of ignoring it, is just as hurtful to you. But... I have a feeling if you hear him out, you'll get your closure." 

Again, you knew he was right about it all. You knew you had been bitter and immature about the entire situation. You paced for a moment, thinking about how you could even apologize to him. He'd been trying to fix things, and talk just like you wanted. Why have you held on to all that anger for so long? You were in the wrong too, more so than he was. You needed to apologize quickly.

"Just take the night to process and decompress. You'll have plenty of opportunities to talk with him, especially since his mission in life lately is just that. Again, we've all noticed it, he can't seem to leave you alone."

"Do you know what he's up to?" You squint your eyes at Ji suspiciously. 

"He won't tell anyone exactly why he's doing what he's doing. But I have my own speculations, which I won't be sharing because I'm not trying to meddle and put ideas in your head. After talking with him a bit tonight, I don't think he's aiming to hurt you, that's for sure." 

You sighed again, and nodded. 

"Now. Dinner and comfort anime? I'm thinking.... Nana?" 

"God, yes please. I need a distraction from realizing how much of an asshole I was. That I was actually the one starting issues." You groan, and you both plop down the couch and start to order food. 

Ji went home half an hour ago, and you're now staring at your phone. Debating the text you typed up to Chan. Your finger was hovering over the send button. It would be better to apologize in person, but you weren't sure you could face him without some sort of emotional outburst anymore. It was something you needed to work on. So maybe smoothing things over through text before you spoke with him would help.  

You read it over one last time... God you sounded too professional, like you were talking to your boss. You hit send anyway, you weren't going to come up with anything better to say. You put your phone down, only for it to buzz a minute later.

Good... things are starting to get better. Or so you thought. 

You didn't see him at all on Thursday, nor spoke to him. You didn't see Jiji either, but he confirmed through text that Chan had been cooped up with him in the studio. You felt bad, knowing you probably added more stress to their jobs. Especially considering Ji ditched work yesterday to comfort you. 

Now it was Friday, and they were back at work in the studio again. Hyunjin was over yours because he finished up early, the both of you were just hanging out. Waiting for everyone else to get out. The nine of you were recommencing weekend get togethers.

"You should bring them food." Hyunjin, who was currently laying across your couch suggested.

He could sense your anxiety, constantly checking your phone for the time. He knew you wanted to talk to Chan, finally.

"I don't want to interrupt them, I already did that yesterday." You mumbled.

"Tch, like either of them would really view you as an interruption. They'd be elated."

"Ji? Yes, yes he would. You know things are weird between me and Chan though." You whined.

"Mmm, but this could be your chance to fix it." He suggested in a sing-song voice. 

You actually debated it, but you didn't want to prolong his work tonight by stealing time for a conversation. A most likely lengthy conversation. 

You looked at the clock, still debating and wondering if you had time. When you saw the time you realized it was much later than you thought. 

"Shit, forget food. We're going to be late." 

Hyunjin glanced at the time and nodded, "Alright, let's head to mine."

You grabbed your keys and headed for the door, Hyunjin followed and soon you both were in the car on the way to the dorm. 

Once you got there, and Hyunjin let you in, you realized everyone was already here, judging by the pile of shoes. It seemed, the majority were getting cleaned up and changed into fresh clothes. 

"I'm going to change too! I need to get out these jeans and into something comfier. Just make yourself at home!" He said while heading to his bedroom. 

You sat on the couch and started scrolling on your phone. You were laughing at a funny video when you heard someone walking down the hall. Of course Chan is the first to finish, and he decides to join you on the couch. He takes the seat next to you, like right next to you. 

"Um... Do you have to sit so close?" You say in the softest voice you could manage.

Remember. Stay level headed, no snapping, no meltdown, no blow ups. Don't yell. 

He looks at you a bit defeated, and moves to the other end of the couch. 

You sigh. Things were still touchy. It can't keep continuing on like this, it's too uncomfortable for you both. You have to apologize and make amends. It's now or never, but he speaks before you the chance. 

"Y/n. Is now a good time to talk?" He says in a serious tone, with a stern look on his face. 

You tense under his gaze, and your stomach feels like it's sinking. Was he that mad at you? You kind of understand why though. 

"S-sure." You stuttered.

His eyes darkened, tongue poking his cheek. He's getting shifty now, and glancing down the hallway.

 "Do you mind if we talk in private?" 

You suppose it would be even more uncomfortable if someone else happened across you two discussing this. So when he stands up and heads towards his room, you follow him into it. 

His room was neat. You'd never been in it before, and sure, you've seen the live streams. But it was a very different feeling, seeing it through a screen versus being inside it. 

He sits on his bed, and pats the spot next to him for you to sit. You opt for leaning against the door, arms crossed in front of you. You were feeling defensive still, and didn't want to push your limits. It was his turn to sigh now, as he hung his head.

"Y/n I meant it when I said I'm really tryi--"

"Can I say something first... and then I promised I won't interrupt you again."

He just nods, with his tongue poking his cheek again. You know you're pushing his buttons, but you felt you needed to apologize before anything. Now you decided to sit next to him, twisting your torso to face him. And he did the same to face you. 

"I'm sorry for the way I acted. It was incredibly childish." You sighed, "I know you had every right to change your mind, and I shouldn't have gotten so angry over it. I never meant to act so toxic towards you. I should've just accepted the fact that you wanted to stop and moved on. But the truth is... I've liked you for a while now. So when that happened, in my head, I took it as you reciprocating my feelings. Which doesn't make any sense, because you never knew of my feelings.”

Chan snorted a bit, trying to conceal a laugh.

“Then when you stopped, paired with the look on your face, it felt like you realized you made a mistake doing that with me. You looked like you were disgusted. Which I promise you, I now totally understand if that's the case. But it still hurt me... regardless, I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. So again, I'm sorry. I truly am. I hope you can forgive me." You managed to get it all out clearly, with a steady tone. 

He was staring at you with a thoughtful look on his face, soaking in your words, processing. Then he smirked, and that was the last thing you expected. 

"I guess you were acting a little bratty." He chuckled a bit. 

Then he reached for your hand, putting his on top of yours. You felt the fluttering in your stomach at his simple action. But you flipped your hand over anyways, palm up and letting him hold it.

"But y/n, you've got it all wrong, and it's partly my fault." He started, and your eyebrows furrowed, a look of confusion falling on your face.

"I like you too," he squeezed your hand gently, and it was oddly comforting, "The reason I stopped is because I didn't want you to think that all I wanted from you was sex. Because I want so much more." 

Were you dreaming? Is he really confessing right now? Even after how horrible you were towards him?

"I know the way I acted before doesn't exactly translate to me having feelings for you." He continued, "The truth is I was too scared to confess, until that night. The liquor gave me that extra boost of confidence, and you just... looked so beautiful. And the game we played, and catching you look my way multiple times. It almost confirmed to me that you wanted me too. Because I wanted you then and there. So when I saw you in the hallway, I thought it was my chance. But I let the lust take over."

Heat started to spread in your lower stomach at his words, and he kept going. 

"I wanted to do things the proper way. I wanted to confess, and ensure that you knew I was serious about you, and not a fling. I wanted to take you out on dates, and properly ask you to be mine. I should have just said it all that night. I got scared again though, and just froze. And I know the way I was acting right after was confusing, I didn't mean to give you mixed signals."

Your head was spinning with all the information he was sharing, it truly felt like you were in a daydream. Then you found your voice again.

"It felt like you were disgusted with me." You whispered, "And then you were acting so nonchalant about the whole thing, as if it never happened. I guess I was assuming things."

He cupped your cheek, and comfortingly rubbed his thumb against it

"I could never be disgusted by you, love."

You had to resist a shiver at him calling you that pet name.

"I wanted us both to be sober too. That's why I idiotically told you to drink water, and rest. And the next morning, I was so nervous because you were rushing to leave. You had tears in your eyes, I said the first thing to pop into my head. I was hoping to talk about everything that morning. But then you walked out the door, and I felt like I had no right to stop you.  Then Hannie was so mad at me, you stopped coming around. I felt like I fucked everything up and I lost all hope for a while." He sounded distraught.

“Until Hannie argued with me, yelling at me to fix things. He outright put the entire blame on me, and he did this in front of everyone. So that experience paired with your disappearance from our lives, especially Hannies life. He was so lost without you, I knew I had to try and fix it right away. I had been wanting to, I was just so unsure how to go about it. But Han's words pushed me to just go for it."

You took the opportunity to scoot closer to him, side by side now. He threw his arm around your waist. 

"The elevator... ugh. I was just so hurt, I was so sure that you were going to come up with excuses, try to let me down easy. I was terrified of the rejection. I had no idea, I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing, we were both a little clueless about everything."

"I guess we were just a little stupid, huh?" You laughed.

He chuckled, "Just a bit."

"Then when Hyunjin happened to mention something, that's when I fully had hope again. So I tried to approach you, and be friendly, and get you snacks. I tried to help you out at work when I could. I was still unsure of how to bring it up to you." He admitted.

You felt so ashamed, "And then I went and yelled at you. I didn't even let you speak, ugh. I'm so sorry." 

"Again with the apologizing," He chuckled, "I told you, we were just confused about it. There was a lot of miscommunication... when we did talk anyways."

"I know, I was feeling and throwing mixed signals. All I wanted the entire time was to talk about it. Yet, I tried to avoid you at all costs. It doesn't exactly make sense. God, I was so... so childish."

"You were feisty is what you were. And I'm sure you still are." He joked.

You giggled. It was unbelievable how understanding he was. It was more shocking how wrong you were about his feelings. You had completely misconstrued everything. Assuming the worst. You couldn't be happier about being so wrong.

Nuzzling into his chest, and wrapping your arm around his torso, had him humming contently. But then you thought of what he said earlier. 

"What did Hyunjin say...?"

He cleared his throat, "When you made Hannie apologize to me, Jin said that you were acting almost protective over me. It made me think that I had a chance of proving my feelings for you."

"So that's the true reason why you were so friendly, and constantly getting me things and trying to help me out. You were lowkey trying to confess.” You looked up to him smiling.

He was blushing now, "Yeah, but I realize I was still doing things a little out of order. I'm terrible at communicating I guess." 

"Channie..." you said for the first time, and his blush got deeper, "I know it means a lot to you to do things traditionally. And I appreciate the effort you put in to accomplish that. But to me, it doesn't matter as much. We could've figured everything out afterwards." You said softly, and he was smiling down at you. 

"I guess I should catch up to the modern age." He joked. 

"Never! You prove that chivalry isn't dead. I love that you're a romanticist. Don't change." You laughed, "And... the communication problems? That's something we can both work on. I need to fix that in me too."

You felt him tense, and he caught your chin between his fingers, pushing you to look up at him further. You felt the warmth of his breathing spread across your face, he had that same look on his face as when he leant in to kiss you that night. Wetness was now pooling in your panties, and you had to resist clenching your thighs together. He was so in tune with your body language, and he caught it last time. You're sure he would notice again. You didn't want him to think you were rushing him into sex.

"So... does that mean you want to give us a go?" He was so serious when he said it, you could see the glint of excitement in his eyes though. 

"Of course, it's a dream come true." You smiled at him.

He was quick to bring his lips to yours, kissing you sweetly, softly. You sighed into the kiss, and felt like you were melting into him as you turned your body towards him more. You brought your hands up, one resting on the side of his neck, the other on his shoulder. He brought his other hand to the back of your head, and combed his fingers into your curls. 

He pulled you closer, deepening the kiss, licking your bottom lip. Your tongue met his, and soon you were wrestling against his for dominance. He started leaning you back against his bed, adjusting himself on top of you, knees on either side of your thighs. His hands roamed your body and he never broke away from your lips. You were nearly panting into his mouth, giving up and allowing him to explore your mouth. Your hands clutching his shirt like it would save you. The kiss was messy, downright sloppy, and you loved it. You were both desperate for this.

You wanted to imprint his touch into your mind. Every area he grazed made you feel tingly all over. Your entire body was oversensitive for him. You'd never felt like this with anyone else. 

Then he was playing with the hem of your shirt, his fingers grazing your stomach. You mewled at that, and he groaned. It was so high pitched it nearly sounded like a whimper. 

"Please... I still want you." He whispered against your lips. 

You were breathing heavy, chest heaving. You couldn't help it when your hips bucked up, letting yourself get consumed by lust, "Yes, god yes. I need you."

He re-positioned himself, lowering his body onto yours and letting his hips grind into you. You could feel his length against you through his shorts, and you whined. Even this felt like ecstasy, he almost made you cum last time from dry humping. He was so skilled at making sure you got friction exactly where you needed it. It was driving you feral. 

His lips attached to your neck, kissing, sucking, and biting his way down to your chest. His hand groped your breast, kneading it. Then he rolled over, flipping your position, so you were on top of him. It was your turn to grind your hips, your core rubbing directly on his erection. He threw his head back, mouth hanging open. His hands gripped your waist, helping you move against him. 

Things felt less rushed this time around. It felt like all time stopped, and the only thing that existed in the world was you and him. You wanted to be lost in this passion with him forever. The high he made you feel, made your head all hazy with desire. 

"Fuck..." He whispered as he looked up at you, seeing how fucked out you looked already. 

His hands slipped underneath your shirt, pulling it up. You took the hint and ripped it off, unclasping your bra afterwards. 

You had to admit, you felt your face flush again, at being exposed to him. But he soon wiped the thought from your mind, leaning up and placing soft kisses all over your chest. He kissed up to your collar bones, he kissed each mound, kissed in between them, he even kissed your nipples so gently. 

You were learning he was a tease.

One hand was kneading your breast again, the other braced against your back. Then his lips closed around one of your nipples, and his hot tongue swirled around it. His hand now playing with the other. Pinching, flicking, and rubbing. He braced the hand against your back, pushing you into him more, while he sucked your nipple harshly. You whimpered, and your hips started rolling against him again.

He pulled off with a pop, and mumbled "I could worship these tits love, all of you is so gorgeous."

His words made you blush, and then he pushed you onto your back again. He clearly wasn't scared to manhandle you at all. He was quickly unbuttoning and unzipping your jeans.

"Need to tase you..." He mumbled again.

You liked needy Chan, somehow he kept the perfect balance of dominant yet deprived for you. He positioned himself between your legs, kissing and licking every inch of them. He held your inner thigh, pushing your legs apart to expose your panties. He placed a kiss on your clothed center, and groaned at the wet spot that was already there. His tongue peeked out, and he licked a slow stripe up, making your underwear wetter. Your eyes rolled back and you sighed, craving more.

And did you mention that you loved how vocal he was? 

He licked his lips as he glanced up at you, mumbling "Taste so good, 'M gonna be addicted. Wanna be between your thighs all the time."

Then he spoke more clearly, with a smirk on his face "You're going to sit on my face one day. I want you to ride it."

You whined at the thought, and pushed your hips up, searching for friction. He took the opportunity to slide your panties to the side, and his tongue slid between your folds immediately. 

You moaned loudly as his tongue flicked against your clit. You felt like you were on fire, yet shivering at the goosebumps spreading all over your body. Your hand reached down to his hair, and he groaned again, making his lips vibrate against you. 

"Mmm... fuck." You moaned as you rocked your hips against his face. 

He has no objections, but he momentarily paused to rip your panties off. Then he wraps his arms around each thigh, forcing you to open wider for him. He buried his face in you, letting his tongue dip into your entrance. 

You gasped at the intrusion, your hand squeezing tighter into his hair. It had you nearly wailing. You'd never felt that before, and you think you could cum from it.

When his lips closed around your clit, he sucked. You were panting, feeling that familiar pleasure slowly coil in your lower abdomen. 

He wasn't shy at all about devouring you, making slurping and squelching sounds. He brought his hand to your entrance, and slipped two fingers inside. You moaned, and he let you adjust before curling his fingers and pumping into you. Your orgasm is building faster now. 

Writhing on the bed, and clutching his sheets, he did his best to keep you still. You were a moaning and whining mess. You couldn't help but be loud. His hand moved faster, as the tip of his tongue flicked at your clit. It was all too much as you felt your climax wash over your. You let out a desperate groan, your legs quivering as his hand squeezed your thigh tighter, preventing you from squeezing your legs shut.

Once you whimpered at the overstimulation, he stopped. Giving your clit one last kiss, sending one last shiver up your spine. Your chest was heaving, you were out of breath. He climbed up your body, wiping your juices and his saliva off his chin with the back of his hand. When he kissed you again, you could taste yourself on him, and you hummed as you licked against his tongue.

He kept kissing you, and you tugged at his shirt, "No fair, I'm completely naked and you're fully dressed."

He chuckled and sat up, pulling his shirt off. You reached up to feel his abs, fingers tracing between each muscle. You moved up to his pecks, and when your palm grazed against his nipple, he hissed. Picking up on it, it was your turn to kiss his chest, making sure to pay special attention to his nipples. Your tongue lapping at them, and then sucking them. 

He quickly turned into a whining mess. His voice making you grow wetter, and clenching around nothing. 

You really loved how vocal he was.

He made quick work of pulling his pants and boxers off, and leaned back down to kiss you. The pressure of his weight on top of you was comforting, and you placed your arms on his shoulders. His cock twitched against your core, and you were mewling again. 

He smiled against your lips and whispered, "Is my love needy right now?"

Then his fingers wrapped around your neck, and you bit your lip. Your hand was now on top of his, making him squeeze lightly, and you whined.

"Does my baby girl want to be choked right now?”

"Chan if you don't fuck me right now, I swear I'll--"

Before you could finish, he was gripping the base of his member. Sliding into you at a steady pace, and you gasped. He lets you adjust again. The length surprised you, and his girth stretched you deliciously. You always knew this man was hung. 

His hand never left your throat, and he did add more pressure around it. But you still desperately needed more.

He must've read your mind, or at least your face, "You're really into breathplay huh? Need it harder?"

Your mind was clouded in pleasure, you felt so full having him inside you. His hand on your throat only heightens it. So you nodded as best you could. 

"Remember, I need the words baby girl." 

"Yes, yes, fuck yes." You moaned.

He nearly growled as he pulled out and snapped his hips into you sharply. He kept pumping into you. Rolling his hips into you roughly, skin slapping against skin. His hand squeezed your throat tightly, cutting off all oxygen and then easing up, so you could get a proper breath in. Everything felt blissful, consumed by need. 

Your hips started rolling, meeting each of his thrusts. You were focused on making sure you both got off.

He had his eyes closed, face scrunched in concentration and panting, "Shit, you're so wet love. So tight, gonna cum too fast."

You clenched around him hearing that, and let out another whimper. You felt it building up in you again. His pace became uneven, and you knew he was nearing his climax. 

"Please..." he begged with a strangled whine, "Cum with me, can't hold on much longer."

"Channie... so close, just a little more." You panted back.

He removed his hand from around your neck and down to your clit, rubbing quickly in little circles. That was all you needed to let go, becoming a moaning and quivering mess. Your walls were clenching around him again, as you rode out your orgasm. 

He groans, hips stuttering before he pulls out of you. Giving himself a few pumps, he let out a loud and strangled cry as he finished. He was spurting ropes of cum all over your stomach, only slowing when the last of it was dripping down his cock and onto his fingers.

It was so sensual, you grabbed his hand and sucked them into your mouth. Making sure to lick them clean, keeping eye contact with him. His lips parted and he was looking at you so affectionately. When you finally popped them out of your mouth, he immediately caressed your face.

"How are you so perfect?" He murmured. 

He bent down and pressed a gentle kiss against your lips, and you slowly moved yours with his. This kiss was different, less desperate and more so savoring the moment. You felt lost in him. Nothing else mattered right now but you and him, the rest of the world melted away. You two were in your own bubble, and you couldn't be happier. 

When he pulled away, he spoke "That was amazing, my love." 

"It was." You giggled.

"I'm sorry it was a little rushed, I was craving you so bad." He said as he rested his head in the crook of your neck, a little embarrassed. 

Your fingers brushed through his hair. He was right, it was rushed on both ends. You both were a little clumsy, figuring out each other's bodies for the first time. But that doesn't mean the sex was horrible, he made you cum twice. 

"We'll have plenty of chances to take our time with each other. I think after everything, we were both hopelessly desperate for each other, and like you said. It was amazing Channie."

"I like hearing Channie coming from you, as different as it is." 

"Mmmm, I have to think of another pet name. You claimed 'love' already." 

He just chuckled, "You can call me whatever you want, Channie, love, Jagi. I don't mind."

"I think Ji would keel over if I called you Jagi instead of him." You giggled.

"Hannie can deal with it, he's not the only man in your life that's close to you anymore." 

Chan got up to get you a towel, and cleaned you up.

You felt satisfied, laying down facing each other, and still embracing. 

"So, about the other chances you mentioned. Maybe we can try out the edging you like so much. And all it takes for me to truly dom you is flipping a switch in my head and not holding back. I'm just not sure you can handle it."

"I can handle it, I'll be your perfect little sub." You snuggle closer to him.

"Hmmm, why do I doubt that for some reason. We already know how bratty you are."

"That just means more punishments for me, which I'm sure we'll both love."

"Is that so?" He started leaning in to kiss you.

Suddenly there was banging on the door. 

"Are you two finished? I'm assuming your finished since all the noise stopped." Hanji yelled.

You looked wide eyed at Chan and he had a smug smile on his face.

"We'd like you to join us, we're playing cards against humanity tonight. Besides it's my time with my Jagi again, I'd like to be able to see you." Jiji shouted through the door. 

You both scrambled to dress yourselves. He gave you his t-shirt, and some sweats. Slipping on nearly the same outfit, you opened the door to a pouting Ji. His face slowly transformed into a smirk as he looked you up and down. 

"Better fix your sex hair babes, although I guess there’s no hiding your hickies and bruises though." He leaned in and whispered, "I didn't know you liked it that rough, his fingers are clear as day on your neck. You nympho." He poked your tummy repeatedly. 

You nudged him and rolled your eyes, "Shut up." 

Channie came up behind you, and wrapped his arms around your waist, giving you a back hug. Just like that, Ji was back to pouting. 

"This means I have to share my cuddle time, ugh." He whined.

Chan just patted the top of his head, laughing, "You'll get used to it." 

"Hmph. I'm not going to stop calling her Jagi or babe or any other pet names. I was here first!" He stated.

Chan just chuckled, "I wouldn't expect you to Hannie."

He just turned around, still pouting, and headed back to the living room. You and Channie followed behind him, hand in hand. Eyes glued to each other, and smiling. 

"Oh great, we have to deal with this now, on top of you and Han overdosing us with PDA?" Seungmin complained. 

"I just knew something was up with you two, it's about time you fixed it." Innie commented. 

"Yeah, and by the sound of it. Making up went really well." Changbin jokes, then his eyes wander to your neck, "You know, for as much noise you two were making, I'd never expect you'd be choking her in there."

You blushed intensely, and Channie cleared his throat, smiling, and scratching the back of his head. The group laughed, and you and Chan took your seats. Which was him sitting in the chair as usual, and you sitting in his lap. 

"God, this is going to take getting used to." Hyunjin said with a smirk. 

"You act like you didn't partially help orchestrate this whole thing." Jiji teased. 

"What?!" Felix snapped, "And you didn't tell me?" Now he was pouting. 

"It wasn't my business to tell. Besides, I only nudged them a little bit to communicate. They both seriously lack in that area." Hyune responded. 

"Mmhm, I have to agree with that." Minho chimed in with a smug smile. 

"Alright, alright. Enough poking fun at us. All that matters is that things can go back to normal." Chan said. 

You faced him, "I still don't think this was our normal before, but it definitely can be our new normal now." 

He smiled and gave you a peck on the lips, to which the entire room started gagging, and acting disgusted. They got distracted while setting up the card game, Chan whispered something in your ear. 

"I know we've been doing things abnormally, and this might be a little fast. And we also have a lot more to talk about, but... Will you be mine?" 

You break out into a huge smile, and press your lips to his ear, "Of course Channie. I'd love nothing more than to be your girlfriend."

He turned his head to kiss you again, except this time it wasn't a peck. Your lips moved in sync for a few seconds, and everyone once again noticed. 

"Yeah, you were right Hyune. This is going to take A LOT of getting used to." Felix agreed.

"I don't think I've ever seen Chan-hyung like this before... It's a little weird." Innie chimed in.

"That's because he hasn't done anything like this before. Outright claiming someone? That's new territory for him." Minho said.

"No wonder it was so hard for him to pursue y/n." Seungmin said, "Although I really did have a feeling it was going to be Hannie that ended up with her."

Ji made a face, "Never. Our love isn't romantic, even though we both love skinship."

They were interrupted by the wet sounds of you both still making out. 

 Ji started pouting again, shouting, "Yah! Are we going to play or what? Surely you can both hold off until later, sheesh." 

You pulled away and you and Channie laughed.

"Alright, let's play!" You said excitedly. 

Maybe this was new territory for you, but you felt comfortable in it already. You were so glad that you and Channie were able to find solace in each other. Maybe you guys weren't quite in love yet, but you were elated that he returned your feelings fully.  

This is the normal that Chan was talking about, and you wouldn't dream of having it any other way.

Tag List: @jeonginsleftcheek @solandiszale @schniti-is-in-the-house @helloimacalumgirl @jagibangbangchan

@jupire @juwire @jennibahng @emonatural191 @sailor--sun

@mauvemelon @eczlipse @staytinyluv @bangtanskz17 @daehee

@gbskzlover @danceonmyheyday @sleeping-beau-tay @prettiichocolateprincess @aracy

@bbokarimenu @my-neurodivergent-world @haven-skies @irrevocable-exposure @readr1221

@tsunderelino @joyofbebbanburg @wildtokay @fuckthinking @loud-minhoe

@ddiidi @majorlymismanaged @skzenthusiastt @anylady-fics @antisocialties

@maisyyyyyy @meowmeowminnie @adieu-lisette @lookitsjess @kpopsstuffs

@bubblepop-stay @ohhlittlegirl @ang4lheart @spnwinchestersd

As always, please let me know if you'd like to join the taglist. And if you do, pretty please interact with my fics besides liking. Although I appreciate liking as well! Feedback is always cherished! ♡

But again, please be gentle in your criticism

[hauntedrain]

I Want To Be Home | Charles Leclerc x Fem! Reader |

Summary: Charles gets worried about leaving for the first race of the season, believing he's a bad father and husband for doing so. which leads to a late-night conversation.

✮▹A/N: This is pretty short but it was something I just randomly thought about so I felt the need to write it down, that being said I'm sorry if it's bad or anything.

✰▹Warnings/Notices: Use of Milo as kid name, slight angst? if you squint. Comfort/fluff. Worried Charles. NOT EDITED.

Charles never liked leaving for races ever since he had his kid. He hated it. He didn't want to leave you guys, especially considering anything could happen while he's gone. But what he feared the most about leaving home was missing something fundamental in his kids' life or yours.

He felt like if he missed anything he would be the worse father in the world. This is why when the F1 season came back around after winter break you had to remind him that there's nothing wrong in doing his job and something he's passionate about. This is where this late-night talk formed,

"Ma chérie, what if you get hurt or Milo gets hurt? I can't come back and be here for you." He said while turning completely over to fully look at you.

"Like I said, your family will be here to help if needed, and it's your job char. The team needs you." You said as you pulled yourself closer to him as to get more comfortable with him.

It was pretty late as you already put Milo to bed and got everything sorted for tomorrow, but Charles, he didn't want tomorrow to come as he didn't want to get ready to leave for the first race of the season.

"I get that the team needs me but my family needs me more. Milo is still so tiny, love. I wanna be with him, especially right now."

"Charles, I promise you It'll be okay." You said while messing with his hair a bit as he lowered his head to lay on your chest.

"I feel like a terrible person for leaving like it's a crime. Not only leaving Milo but also leaving you. Like a bad father and husband."

"You're not a bad person and definitely not a bad father or husband. It's okay, if anything we'll come see you at a race as soon as possible. Also, it's not like you don't usually come home between races when possible." you said while running your hands through his hair, he moved a little closer to you before putting his face between your neck and shoulder.

"Ma chérie, Please promise me that you'll call me whenever you need me, or if it's anything with Milo. Please?" He said as he moved to lean a bit more over you. "Please?" he moved back to look you fully in the eyes as he waited for you to respond.

"Of course Char, Always," you said while giving him a peck on the cheek. "But for right now you should probably go to sleep."

From the little light in the room, you could see him smile a bit before he gave you a kiss and laid back down. "Come here, let me hold you."

"You don't have to ask twice."

⭒❃.✮:▹A/N: This is super short and potentially not the best, but like I said it was something that randomly came to me. But nonetheless, I hope you enjoy it and that you like it. Love you pookies.

[horseonvhs]

i'm starting an email newsletter as an alternative to social media/RSS feeds for updates and announcements for Nothing Doing. it's called DIRECT TO VIDEO and you can subscribe here. more details after the break!!

i will be real - part of the reason i'm doing this is that i keep worrying my RSS feed is going to break and i won't know how to fix it. in the wake of cohost shutting down, i know a fair amount of people are looking to move on from social media as a whole and become True RSS Freaks (affectionate), and i'd hate for any readers to lose track of what's going on with the comic because i saved a file wrong or something. if you are sick of social media and you want to keep up with my work, this might be a "the move!"

that said, i also just think there's something novel and fun about newsletters. i don't know yet what i might like to do with it; maybe it'll be a fun way to preview other projects or share little secrets about the comic. anything is possible (though i will say that every edition will have at least one comic in it -- that's the "horse's promise")!

for the first four weeks, there will be twice-weekly updates on Tuesdays and Thursdays containing five strips from the Nothing Doing archive each. once all the strips are archived, it will be updated whenever there is a new comic slash whenever i have something important to announce. it simply would not be a project of mine if it had a more coherent schedule lol

all that to say: comics! directly to your email!! literally what in this world could be better than that!!! subscribe today!!!!!

[satxnsupreme666]

I would never hurt you: Agatha Harkness/Agnes x Fem!reader

Masterlist

Summary: You live in Westview and you’re trapped under Wanda’s mind control, Agatha gets closer to you and you fall in love with her, everything was great until you notice some glitches around town, you end up listening to Agnes and Wanda’s discussion at Agnes’ basement about how everything in Westview is fake, heartbroken you try to leave Westview.

Words: 4000+

Warnings: Angst, but fluff at the end, I think that´s it.

Author’s notes: Hi again!

This was one of the first stories I wrote three years ago, I had posted them on Tumblr on my old account, but due to my mental health, I had to take a break from Tumblr and the toxicity and hate that had suddenly increased, I deleted all of my stories and my old account, now I have decided to upload them again here on Tumblr and also on Ao3.

Again, as this was one of the first stories I wrote for Agatha Harkness is a little bit short, I will be uploading the rest of the stories from time to time, I have to edit them and make sure they are legible enough and with not a lot of grammatical errors.

I hope you enjoy!

If you enjoy, could you comment, like or reblog? it would help a lot really ♥️

You found yourself lying in Agnes’ bed, the shutters were opened and the sun was lighting up her room, you were thinking about the weird things that had happened around Westview for the past days, like the incident that took place the day before yesterday, you saw something really strange while you were choosing the food you would take home.

You tried to recall step by step what had happened, first, in the morning when you left your home, you walked past your front garden and went straight to your mailbox, now that you think about it, you found the action kind of weird, you never got any mail, but still you always checked the small container, it was something that you made exactly at the same hour every morning, as if you just were on autopilot, why did you always do that without even thinking twice? Anyway, you tried to focused on what else you had done that day.

After checking the mailbox you looked to your girlfriend’s house, and you noticed that she was not in her garden, you frowned, she was always there watering her plants and when she looked at you she would go near to the border that separates your garden from hers and she would give you a peck on your lips, you thought many things about why she wasn’t there but you stopped, maybe she just overslept, so you brushed the thought off.

Giving a quick glance to Wanda’s house you noticed it was strangely quiet and calm, it was weird for a family with two kids, well three if you think about it, Wanda’s brother was like the twins’ brother instead of their uncle, you decided to stop thinking about it, maybe they decided to sleep till noon.

Continuing with your daily routine, you started your way to the grocery store, the same store you always went to buy things.

While you were walking down the street, you saw Dottie working in her garden, she was always gardening, now that you thought about it.

She raised her head to look at you curiously, you didn’t mind her, after all she exhibits strange behavior at times, right?

You walked past her and continued your way to the store.

The mailman waved his hand at you with a smile on his face and you smiled back at him, he was always smiling and always greeted everyone, it was nice to see someone with manners, unlike Dottie, whenever she saw you she just stared at you eerily, it was kind of awkward, now that you were thinking about it again, maybe you could ask Agnes if she knew something about the odd looks and weird glances that Dottie had been throwing at you, maybe your girlfriend knew something you didn’t, maybe it wasn’t something important , or maybe Agnes had said something to her and Dottie was just feeling bitter, yes you thought that could be the answer.

Anyway, you arrived at the entrance of the grocery store and took a shopping cart from the ones that were in a row outside the convenience store.

Walking with the shopping cart you went to the beer & wine section, thinking of having a romantic dinner with Agnes later at night, you thought of buying a bottle of red wine, and you could also buy pasta, that would work, yesterday you were reading some recipes in the book that Wanda gave to you, so you could try to prepare something for Agnes and you.

Having Agnes around your house and in your life was awesome, she was always making you smile , you couldn’t help it, she always cracked you up with her jokes and her comments, whenever she had a new gossip she would tell you everything about it right away, when you arrived at her place or when she arrived at yours.

Her laugh and her smile always melted your heart, that and when she called you sweetheart, honey, angel or any other pet name she had for you, you just blushed furiously, you couldn’t help it.

Agnes loved when you blushed at her words, so she loved calling you different pet names.

Wait, you were thinking again about Agnes, you just couldn’t help it, you were so in love with her, again you tried to focused on what had happened at the grocery store, when you put the wine, the pasta, and some chocolates too into the shopping cart, you kept walking and when you turned to the left, right at the end of the aisle you were just leaving, you saw a kid running through the corridor and when he was about to turn to the other side of the aisle, he tripped over his own feet, you gasped because he was carrying a glass bottle milk, he was going to hurt himself! You ran towards the kid to try to catch him, but you were sure you wouldn’t be able to catch him in time, before you could get to him, something happened, the sound of glass shattering against the floor never came, and then you found yourself back in the beer & wine aisle, you were shocked.

What had happened? You stood in the middle of the aisle, not knowing what to do, you were trying not to lose your composure, you tried to keep calm, leaving the shopping cart in the middle of the corridor you went to look for other people and you found the same boy who was about to fall minutes ago, you looked at him and this time he wasn’t carrying the glass bottle, you were perplexed, what had happened?

Leaving the store, you went back to your neighborhood.

What was going on?

You decided to knock on your girlfriend’s door.

Knocking repeatedly, she answered with a huge smile, but when she noticed how tensed and confused you looked, her expression changed for one full of worry.

“Angel, are you ok? What happened?”

You looked at her, lost for words, how were you going to tell her what had happened when you didn’t even know what happened back there?

Agnes looked how pale you were, and took your hand in hers, dragging you to her couch, where she made you sat down in it and she sat down as well next to you, never letting go of your hand.

“Angel what happened? I need you to tell me so I can help you”- With her free hand, she stroked your face, she made you look at her and then she gave you a gentle and loving kiss, her action made you feel less stressed

-“ Agnes, I’m not sure, I was at the grocery store, and a boy was going to fall to the floor and the next thing I knew I was back at the aisle I had been 10 minutes before, I’m not sure what happened I mean, I can’t explain it”-

“oh honey, you do not have to be afraid, it’s ok, come here”

She opened her arms in a sweet gesture, she was about to hug you but you smashed your body against hers, you put your arms around her neck and she placed her hands in your waist, caressing your back.

“Doll, you do not have to worry about any of this, you won’t have to be afraid of this by tomorrow, all of this will end, trust me”

You didn’t think much about her words and just let her comfort you, she smelled like vanilla and her touch soothed you.

She dragged you to her bed, and when you laid next to her against the mattress, she passed her arm around your waist and kissed you, at first the kiss was gentle and loving, but after some minutes the kiss became full of passion.

“Sweetheart, you do not have to worry about nothing, nothing bad will happen to you as long as I’m by your side, alright?”

You nodded and rested your head against her chest while she kept petting your hair, you closed your eyes and fell asleep.

The next day when you woke up, Agnes was not on the other side of her bed, but on her nightstand she had left you a note, you took it an read it, in the letter she told you that she would come home later and that she loved you, so now you were in her bed, thinking about what had happened

You raised your head to look at the clock that was hanging on the wall, it was already noon?

Did you spend all morning thinking?

You removed yourself from Agnes’ bed and went straight to the kitchen, opening the fridge you took the orange juice and poured it into one glass.

You spent two hours trying to watch the tv, but you couldn’t focus on anything, maybe a walk could help to clear your mind.

Going outside to the front yard of your girlfriend, you noticed something, no one was outside their home and everything was eerily silent, you looked around the other houses in front of you, you decided to go to Wanda’s house, maybe she knew something, but when walked towards her house and were about to knock on her door, you saw that Wanda’s house door was open, this was completely wrong, she never left her door opened, what if it was a burglar?

You stepped back, and went back to your girlfriend’s house, you had just arrived at the front door you saw some vines on the floor, they were black with some glowing purple strands, and even though you knew you should have entered to the house you decided to follow the vines.

Walking slowly and watching carefully your surroundings, you followed all the way the vines were going to, and their trace finished on the basement doors of your girlfriend.

At this point you were afraid; Agnes was in danger?

You were afraid, but mostly you were worried, what if someone hurt Agnes?

You plucked up courage to open the basement doors and finally you entered the basement.

The closer you got to the end of the stairs, the darker it became, you were about to enter to the room when you heard Wanda’s voice, what was she doing in your girlfriend’s basement?

What confused you the most was that you heard your girlfriend’s voice too, what was happening?

“ Wanda, Wanda, you didn’t think you were the only magical girl in town did you?”-

What was she talking about? Magic?

You jumped at the sudden sound of a metallic door closing abruptly

“The name’s Agatha Harkness, lovely to finally meet you dear”-

You gasped, you were lost for words, why your girlfriend was calling herself Agatha?

You tried to keep quiet, it was too soon to draw conclusions

“ We have work to do!”

You didn’t understand anything at this point, anything made sense, what were they talking about!?

You listened to Agnes, or Agatha, or whoever she was, saying something about some runes and magic, you couldn’t stop yourself from peeking your head a little inside the basement, you wanted to see your girlfriend

Your girlfriend had a purple shirt and black pants on, but her hair was kind of messy, in a different situation you would have told her how great she looked with the messy hair, but this was different, you tried to focused on what she was about to say.

“Who are you? All those costumes and hairstyles, I was so patient, waiting for you to reveal your true self, I got close with fake Pietro, I had to play along everything you did to get close to your magic”

“When I sensed this place, the afterglow of so many spells cast all at once, oh, I couldn’t make head or tails of it, I had to come here to know the source of all of this powerful magic, I even had to pretend I was your friend!”

-“ I had to pretend I was one your little puppets, I had to play house to make you believe everything was under your mind control, how are you doing it? You’re even running illusions miles away at the edge of town! Magic on autopilot” - She stopped for a moment, before speaking again

“- What’s your secret sister?”

You were perplexed, so everything about this town was just a lie? Everything was fake? And Agnes had known all this time?

You couldn’t believe it, you loved her, you had fallen in love so badly, and everything she had been doing was, she was just lying to you all this time!

So, everything she did was act, like if everything you had passed through together had been just some performance, some kind of play, did she really just pretend everything? Even when she told you that she loved you? You couldn’t believe it

You remembered the first time you met her, you were on your garden, watering the plants and she called you over the border that separated both gardens, you blushed at the sight of your beautiful neighbor calling you, you stopped doing your things and went to greet her.

“- Hello! I’m Y/N-” you looked at her with a smile on your face

“- Well hello to you too dear, my name’s Agnes, it’s a pleasure to meet someone as endearing as you, I noticed you have been working on your garden for quite a long time, so I decided to brought you a glass of cold lemonade, I did it myself, squeezed lemons, added water and some sugar, and on top of everything I put some ice, here take it, it’s rather a hot day, and you look like you need it sweetheart-”

You sobbed at the thought, she just needed you to get close to Wanda, she knew you were her friend, and she planned every little detail since the start, getting close to you and then getting close to the Wanda-Vision family to keep tracks of Wanda, because of her power, and that’s why you couldn’t recall anything before Westview, Wanda created everything, the only thing staying was your real name, but why?

You really didn’t want to think about it anymore, you were completely heartbroken, you thought that what you had with Agnes was especial, that you two belonged together, you had imagine a whole life with her, she told you the same for god’s sake, she had told you how much she loved you, so many kisses that she had given you, and everything felt real, but it was not, you couldn’t stand it, you didn’t want to hear anymore, afraid of what else Agnes could say.

Your sight was blurry, you couldn’t see clearly, tears coming out of your eyes, you couldn’t stop the tears, you wanted to leave, so you turned around ready to leave the basement , but you tripped over a vine and fell down, hitting hard against the cold floor with a thud, you panicked, hoping that they wouldn’t have heard you, you tried to get up from the cold floor without making any kind of noise, however you didn’t succeed at making any noise because you heard footsteps coming towards you

“Y/N? What are you doing here? You’re not supposed to be here sweetheart, let me help you”- She tried to reach your hand and when she touched your hand you hastily pushed her away from her touch

It hurt you deep inside you the way she looked at you, at how you had reacted when she touched you, she looked heartbroken, but was she really?

You were hurt, she didn’t have the right to look hurt, she had lied to you, but even though you wanted to be angry at her, you couldn’t, you just felt sad and exhausted

“ Don’t call me sweetheart, not when you don’t mean it, please Agnes, Agatha or whatever your name is, please stop, you lied to me, why? It would have been better if you just had told me you wanted to be close to Wanda, because of her powers, you shouldn’t have made me believe that you were in love with me, you broke my heart! How could you!?”

“Honey, it’s not what you think, I would never hurt you on purpose, please let me explain everything to you, we can pass through this, together, I DO love you, I’m in love with you-”

-“How am I supposed to believe you? You just told Wanda that you had to play along, that you had to play house, I don’t even know who you truly are”-

You were sobbing really hard, and Agnes had tears streaming down her beautiful face

“Please doll, don’t cry, let me wipe your tears away, I can’t stand seeing you cry, I’m sorry I-” She said crying as well as you

-“I think I should leave”-

Despite not really wanting to leave Agnes you had to, you had to think about everything, about Agnes and about you

“Give me some time, please, I- I need to think, please”

She looked at you, she didn’t want you to go, she wanted to hold you close to her, she wanted to wrap her arms around you and oh how she wanted to tell how much she loved you, but she decided that maybe you would talk to her, when you would have calmed down, so she nodded

“I love you Y/N”

You turned to look at her one more time, and left the basement

You went straight to your not-so-real home, and looked around it, this was not you real home, who were you? You didn’t know, you had to leave, it was the only thing that you thought as something reasonable, you went to your closet to pack some things.

Meanwhile in Agnes’ basement she was having an internal fight with herself, had it been the best to let you go? She had completely forgotten about why she had entered Westview in the first time, yes at first she had just wanted to get close to Wanda’s powers, but the more she shared time with her beloved Y/N, the more she would fall for her, it was your smile and your laugh what had captivated her the most, how your smile would lighten and entire room, the way you looked at her, as if you were mesmerized by her presence, she loved you hair, she loved every single thing about you, and before she had realized she had fallen head over heels for you, she already felt a strong connection with you, she couldn’t lose you, not now, she couldn’t just lose you because of her selfish actions, she gave a quick glance to Wanda and just left her roaming free in the basement, she knew that Wanda was aware of where the exit was.

When Agatha arrived at your house, she looked for you, and you were nowhere to be seen, worry started to creep inside her, so she flew above the city to look for you, when she spotted you, walking down an avenue she rushed to go towards you, she Landed right in front of you and you gasped, she could fly? You would have guessed, she was a witch after all, you stopped walking and look right into her eyes, she had tears running through her eyes as well as you.

“Please Honey, let’s talk, let me explain”

You remained silent, you didn’t know what to tell her, you wanted to hear her out but still she had hurt you a lot

“Talk to me honey, please”

She begged you, and at that point you realized she couldn’t have been acting, you had a soft spot for her, and you loved her a lot, so you threw yourself at her, and she caught you in her arms, you wrapped your arms around her neck, she placed her arms around your waist and tightened her grip around you, as if she was afraid that you would vanished

“Why did you lie to me!?”-

You were hiding your face on her neck and almost choke on your sobs, tears staining her purple sweater

“I’m sorry, I did it to get close to her, to her power, she is a very powerful witch, and when I noticed you were a close friend of hers, I decided to be your friend, I fell for you, I didn’t mean to, but I did and it’s real, I’m sorry for lying to you, I wanted to tell you but, I was afraid, and I’m sorry that you had to hear that, please, I really love you, I can make it up for you, just do not leave me”

She kissed your forehead asking you to forgive her.

When you calmed down, you remove yourself a little from her, just to look at her baby blue eyes.

“I believe you; I’m still hurt about you not telling me the truth but I love you and I don’t think I can let go of you”

You sighed, it will take time, but you were sure that little by little you would trust completely in her.

She looked at you, and caressed your chin and you leant into her hand

“Also, from now on, you will have to tell me the truth, no more lies” -

She smiled at you and nodded

“No more lies, I will make it up to you I promise”

She then, put her forehead against yours and captured your lips against hers, the kiss was gentle and full of love, she would never let you go.

When the two of you felt the need to breath again, you gently broke the kiss, you frown when you remembered about Wanda

“I think you will have to talk to Wanda, otherwise I’m not sure if she will be mad”

She smiled a little and told you with a grin on her face:

“oh don’t worry dear, I’m sure she will understand”

You frowned and pouted, you were not sure

“Ok, ok dear, I will talk to her, but tomorrow, I want to spend the rest of the night with you, alright? I want to hold you close to me, and let you know how much I love you”

You smiled; it was a great idea.

“Ok, let’s go home, I’m exhausted, and the thought of cuddling with you sounds great”

She took the small suitcase that was lying on the floor and looked at you with a smile on her face, she gave you a peck on your lips, then she rested her arm on your waist and brought you closer to her, both of you started to walk towards Agatha’s house, now you would have to get used to call he by her real name, you still had a lot of questions, but you had all the time, you could ask her everything tomorrow morning, for now you would enjoy your night cuddling with her, after all she would never hurt you on purpose.

[papyriasks]

Heya, wanted to send in an ask about UF,US,SF and FS Papyruses (Papyri?) about how they show affection? Maybe how they pine after their crush? Whatever you wanna include just go wild with it! ☕🙏

The Papyri when they have a crush

(Underfell, underswap,swapfell, fellswap & fellswap Gold edition)

(Thank you for the ask too, I hope I answered it correctly :] )

UF (Boss): You will know this man likes you when you can start to get away with little things you couldn't before, instead of threats of violence when you sneakily "taste test" dinner he'll shoot you a side eye with a tap of his heel, or a pinch of the bridge bone when you've done something dumb. He has absolutely zero clue on how to initiate affection, but will subtly position himself in ways in which require you to brush past him or interact with him in some manner, craving your touch. When he gets bashful it often manifests as silent glaring, but you know him well enough that he isn't really angry. He is very cat like when pining over someone, in the sense that he pretends not to care for your presence at all but conveniently always ends up in the same room as you, and oh, he brought you food but not because he thought of you but just because it would go to waste otherwise definitely not any other reason..

US (Slim): Slim is a bit of a romantic, which surprises a lot of people as he isn't often very open about it, but he's the type to rock up to your work with a coffee and a baked good just to chill with you on your lunch break. He'll find out your star sign so he can read your zodiac love compatibility analysis online and looks for your initials on those "your initials your cats" tiktok slides. That being said he's still a bit of a hard one to get to know, sometimes you may catch him staring but if you go to say anything about it he'll just a quickly go to give you a quick ruffle on the head, call you pal and make a quick escape almost like he's shutting down any attempts to return affection. Secretly he's nervous to fuck things up, everyone expects him to be the laid back, no worries guy but letting someone in is letting them know he's got some baggage to him, and feels as though it will drive them away.

SF(Cash): If Cash has caught feelings for you, the first sign will be the fact you will be his new favourite person to annoy the fuck out of. Oh? You thought you were going to be able to quietly wash those dishes with nothing but your thoughts? Think again cause he's already leaning his full body weight against your shoulder pestering you. Cash hates sharing things but for you? You want it, it's yours now. Oh, you really like the bracelet he's got on? No sooner has he pulled you by the hand and transferred it from his wrist to yours. He always has an excuse to drag you along to some shenanigan or midnight adventure, but really he just loves having you around. He's a teaser, will tease you to no end, play the right card and tease him back and you might actually be able to fluster him. He's already a bit of a 'no idea what personal space is' kind of guy but if he's caught feelings he's always looking for opportunities to touch you, whether that's throwing his arm over your shoulder as you're walking or outright sitting right on top of you.

FS (Mutt): very protective, prefers to walk slightly behind you, always watching for any kind of threat and will challenge any stare with a twice as chilling one in return. is the kind of guy to silently notice that you're cold walking at night and without even asking he's draped his coat right over you. He's a little bit more bold in terms of how he behaves when he likes you, if you go to tease him he'll pull you in by the collar until you're a breath away and tease you right back. he's not the type to fall for someone easily , or even actively search in the first place, so if he ends up catching feelings know that he's set on you. The patient type, you don't need to return his feelings or like him back right away, but he'll wait, until it's the right time to have you. If you smoke he's always inviting you outside to share a late night smoke where the two of you will chat all night. Reliable and immensely loyal, will drop everything at any time of day or night to come help you with whatever you need if you so much as shoot him a text asking, though often times you won't even have to ask as he's often already lingering around uninvited.

FS Gold (Coffee): a nervous mess, and the definition of handsy. He is naturally very touchy with his friends so you might not pick up on his little crush immediately and you best believe he will fully well take advantage of that to constantly be all over you. He loves art and you will quickly become a big subject of his works, little squiggles in his notepad to full pieces of digital art. Can become a little jealous if he feels like you don't dedicate enough time to him despite not even being in a relationship with him. He will try to hide his crush from his brother as long as possible but once it comes out you better hope you're in his brothers good books.. that being said he won't stop gushing about you to Wine, you're always on his thoughts, and you're always his favourite thing to talk about. He's a lot more mischievous when he feels comfortable with someone and uses his more innocent and unseeming persona to drop subtle little compliments or semi-flirtatious lines to rile you up and then pretend like he had no idea what he said could be conveyed any other way.. if you do the same back he will 100% blush until his skull is another colour and will probably need 10-15mins to do a full reboot though.

[yuri-is-online]

Sorry if this ask makes absolutely no sense I just need you to know the absolute emotion I feel because of this Ayuu.

I need you to know just . how close to tears I am . I just reread your Azul meeting his Yutu and I am. IM CRYING. THE “Your daddy’s here” IS TAKING ME OUT AND SHOOTING ME DEAD . IM GENUINELY TEARING UP. I think I’ve read every part so far twice over, barring the Yuu specific ones cause they Hurt Me. Speaking of hurt, Deuce!Yutu and Riddle!Yutu hurt me so so bad . All of the Yutus do, but they’re the ones that just came to mind rn and it’s so so sad. Especially Riddle! Yutu because he hates his dad :( Idek why I might’ve blocked out why LMAO,,, I love all the Heartslabyul characters and their kids it makes me cry. Especially Trey. He’s such a weirdly domestic freak that the idea of him being denied the family life he’s always been content with is so so sad. ALL OF THEM . THEY MAKE ME SO SAD BECAUSE THEY WANT TO BE WITH YUU!! They want to be with Yuu, and most of them are obviously happy to have a kid, but to know that that’s been taken away from you by circumstances that are literally destroying the world you live and love in? Yeah. That’s Rough!!

I would love to see Jamil!Yutu and how Jamil reacts to his child feeling guilt for something he never did, was never responsible for, and again has to suffer through because of the family theirs has been forced to serve. I think he’d be so mad, so so mad this boy has grown up thinking he’s the biggest blight of his father’s life, the cause of his death, when in reality he’s probably someone Original Timeline! Jamil would have cherished.

I LOVE YOU RUGGIE BUCCHI!!! Sorry I needed to cry that out this made me love him so much more!!! And Rook!! I love you Rook Hunt you weirdo. Ruggie being like “Idrk what to do… but I can bug Leona about it” is so so real. Him not caring if his son is charismatic as long as he knows his cards and is able to survive. Rook as a phantom is genuinely breaking my heart idk why. All of the phantoms break my heart. I don’t want to imagine anything abt them if I do because if I imagine them having even a fraction of sentience I’m heartbroken. Imagine being unable to prevent something from possessing you. Imagine your body and soul being used to tear your home apart— imagine seeing any of that through your own eyes. Imagine seeing your own kid after years of thinking them missing. I would genuinely not be able to handle that. It’s giving the Last of Us zombies where they’re completely aware and conscious throughout the first phase. Scared . Heartbroken .

Anyways, this au is 100000/10 I need you to know this. YOUR MIND IS SO SO BRILLIANT!!! I’m probably gonna keep rereading everything you’ve written so far about it because I’m having so many brain worms . So so many. Sorry for this ramble!! Please ignore this ask if for any reason I might have said something you didn’t like >:]]]] I HOPE YOU HAVE A WONDERFUL YEAR!!!!

;-; ty so much for your kind words anon I am injecting them into my veins to continue writing. You have said nothing wrong, rambles are nice to receive, though my ask box is a bit cluttered at the moment and I am super busy so getting to things in a timely manner is not something I am able to do.

Riddle! Yutu was the first one to get a post, and I am tempted to re do it as I was still figuring out the format. He hates his dad because he wasn't there for him when he was a child and he doesn't know why. In the good timeline he's something of a daddy's boy; he really wants Riddle to be proud of and praise him

After I finish editing the second part of Rook's post you will be pleased to know the next post is about Jamil. I'm still formulating the outline of it because I've been thinking some thoughts about stars and unique magics

The way I write the phantoms they posses the instincts of their former selves but the individual lacks the input you might associate with consciousness. I'll get more into it in the second half of Rook's post... but there is a degree of awareness of their actions.

There's a lot of tragedy in this ayuu, I'm glad I'm hitting my stride with it c: it's nice to know people are liking it

[kinzis-writing]

Sweet Nothing | Tee Higgins

Summary: Tee and Y/N appreciate the simple pleasures of being together, no matter what the world puts them through.

Pairing: Tee Higgins x Fem! Reader

Requested: Yes | No Based on this request!

Warnings: mentions of hate, private relationship, reader is well-known as well, suggestive content?

Note: I apologize if you did not want the reader to be "famous" or well-know, I just felt it would fit better with what I wrote. I can always re-write if you do not like it, just let me know! 🫶

*Not edited*

Word Count: 3.2k *not including song lyrics*

I spy with my little tired eye, tiny as a firefly A pebble that we picked up last July, down deep inside your pocket, we almost forgot it Does it ever miss Wicklow sometimes?

“Hey, do you need any laundry done? I was going to throw a load in, and I didn’t have a full one.” Y/N asked as she entered the home gym, where the two often worked out together. It was something that they liked to do, but Tee did it for longer and every day, while Y/N only did it twice to three times a week.

Tee thought for a moment, taking a break from lifting weights. “I have that jacket and jeans that I wore on our trip, if you don’t care to throw them in. I’ll get the rest.” He spoke softly sending his girlfriend a thankful smile before getting back to what he was previously doing.

Y/N turned around to go get the outfit that he was talking about. During his offseason, he had taken Y/N on a trip to Ireland because he knew that she had always wanted to go there. It was the best week of Y/N’s life, just being with Tee in the silence and privacy of a nice quiet vacation. They got to bathe in each other’s company and not worry about the media putting their relationship down or fans of either for that matter.

She threw the clothes in the washing machine, but not before cleaning out the pockets of all the clothes. There had been many times when she had accidentally washed money, keys, and so on since she did not check the pockets of clothing items. Everything was clear until she reached the pocket of Tee’s bottoms, she carefully pulled out a small pebble, looking at it in awe before throwing the pair of pants into the machine and starting the cycle.

“Hey, babe!” She called as she made her way to their shared master bedroom of the home. Tee had officially asked her to move in before they left for Ireland, and she had agreed to take that next step in their relationship. She also knew that Tee’s workout was done and that he would be in the bathroom, either showering or had just gotten out of the shower. “I found this in your pant pocket.” She spoke when she walked into the bathroom and showed Tee the small stone in her hand. They probably weren’t supposed to take things from there, but it was a memory and to be honest, both had forgotten that they even brought it home.

A smile grew on Tee’s face as he noticed the little pebble, “from Wicklow?” he questioned even though he knew the answer. “You were so happy that trip, we were so happy and free that trip.” He corrected while thinking back to the best time together. When you two didn’t have to worry about anything but calling your family to assure them that you were okay.

Y/N thought for a moment, “I bet if it was a living breathing thing that it would miss it’s home in Wicklow.” She spoke her thoughts. That was something the two always did with each other, there was rarely secrets, unless it was surprises. “I know I miss it.”

Tee gave her a reassuring smile, “It will get better.”

They said the end is coming, everyone's up to something I find myself running home to your sweet nothings outside, they're pushin and shovin, you're in the kitchen humming All that you ever wanted from was sweet nothing.

A week later, Y/N and Tee were back to their regular schedules. Tee had practice, interviews, and meetings. Y/N had interviews, studio recordings, Teasers to release, and a few other things on her schedule. This day, Y/N had two interviews back-to-back. Except one interviewer had decided to get out of line and ask some rude questions and made some rude comments about her relationship with Tee. Which only led her to go on Instagram and read through the comments on Tee’s and the Bengals newest Instagram posts.

She hated it when he caved and looked at the hate messages, but she needed to find an argument for what the interviewer had said. Yet, it was impossible. Sure, the two had some loyal fans who appreciated them no matter what or who they dated, but most of their fans were jealous of at least one of them. She thought about the interview and the comments the entire drive back to her and Tee’s shared house.

She had cursed herself when she noticed Tee’s car in the driveway, meaning that he had beaten her home. So, there was no way that she was going to be able to pull her “I’m okay” card, seeing as it caught her off guard. She had taken a few deep breaths before grabbing her bag and making her way in the house, she was hoping that he would not hear her come in so she could go calm down for a minute before having to face him.

“Hey, baby!” Tee greeted from the room he was in when he heard the door close and lock. “How was your day?”

One of the many things you loved about Tee was how much he cared about you. He always put your needs before his and you knew that there was no one else better. “Okay, I think I am going to rest a bit.” She muttered hoping that she was monotoned and the proof of crying wasn’t showing.

“Woah,” Tee called when he noticed her walk past the living room but had caught her tone. He read her too well, and he honestly knew her too well to fall for any of her tricks. “Come here, what happened?”

Y/N waved it off. She knew that mentioning what happened today would make Tee feel guilty when he had no control over egotistical hosts and what his fans and Y/N’s haters think, as well as vice versa. “I’m fine, just a rough day.” She assured walking into the living room.

“Talk to me.” He reasoned to try to make her feel better.

Y/N sighed before throwing her purse on the coffee table in the living room and plopping down on the couch beside her boyfriend. “My first interview went fine. The second interviewer was rude.” Y/N explained to Tee as he listened to what her day had consisted of. He knew that she didn’t let things get to her, but when they did, they could be overpowering. “He asked what song I would write when you cheated on me because all professional athletes cheat. He then proceeded to tell me that a relationship between a singer and professional athlete will never work out. I honestly think he booked me on his show just to dog us.”

Tee gave her a sad smile before pulling her into his chest and let her rest there, “You can’t listen to people like him. You are the best woman out there for me, and nothing is ever going to change that.” He assured placing a soft kiss on her head.

“I’m sorry.” Y/N mumbled as her eyes became teary again, “After he got in my head, I looked at Instagram and twitter comments.” She admitted as she wrapped her arm around his abdomen and blinked her tears away. “On twitter, your mom was defending us and you. But it still gets to me sometimes.” Y/N was forever thankful for having a loving relationship with Tee’s mom. Not only for Tee but also for their relationship and everything that his mother had been through. She deserved to be worry free about her son’s relationship and she loved that the two trusted each other.

“I know, baby.” He assured placing another reassuring kiss on her forehead before pulling away a bit. “You still need to know that whatever they say isn’t true. You’re my girl and you always will be.”

With that, Y/N felt herself drifting off into sleep. Her body was exhausted from worrying about the hate and the comments that the couple was getting. Around two hours later, Y/N had woken up by herself on their living room couch, the smell of food and loud humming coming from the kitchen made her smile to herself a bit. Standing up and stretching, she yawned before making her way into their shared kitchen to where he was finishing up dinner. Since they were both on a similar diet, seeing as they supported each other to that extent.

“Good morning, beautiful.” Tee teased when Y/N had walked into the kitchen. Her perfectly curled hair had turned a bit frizzy from where she had fallen asleep on him during their prior conversation. “I finished the house chores and dinner will be done in a minute.”

Y/N gave him a thankful smile, “Thank you, but you didn’t have to do that.” She spoke as she took a seat at the island on one of their bar stools.

Tee shrugged as he held up the box of stuff that he was making, “I used one of those pre-prepped meal kits you buy for us all the time.” He explained before laying the instruction back on the table beside him.

In moments like these, Y/N was so thankful because unlike her other boyfriends, Tee wanted nothing other than her.

On the way home, I wrote a poem You say, "what a mind" this happens all the time.

The next few days had flown by, and the Bengals had just played a game and won, which was why Tee and Y/N were in the car driving back to their place. Joe had ended up having a celebration at his house and the couple had shown up. Y/N didn’t mind, neither of them had been drinking that night and driving at night was calming to her.

“Okay, but what about something like this, “unexpected, this thing we fell into like, so connected. You can at a time when my heart was selective, didn’t have to choose, my love was accepted.” I wanted to get your opinion because I just came up with that idea for a song and- “Y/N trailed off not knowing where she was taking the conversation.

“You want to know what I think?” Tee asked wanting to know if she wanted an honest answer. Y/N nodded willing to take any criticism coming from her boyfriend. “What a mind you have, you came up with that in less than 24 hours and it would be amazing on your next album.”

Y/N was used to Tee’s compliments by now. It happened all the time because he never let her go unnoticed or never forgot to let her know how proud or in love, he was with her. Y/N tried her best to keep up with Tee when it came to assurance to make sure that he knew that he was just as special and important as he tried to make her feel.

“I love you, so very much.” Y/N spoke softly as she interlocked their hands together.

“I love you too.”

Cause they said the end is coming, everyone's up to something I find myself running home to your sweet nothings Outside, they're pushing and shoving You're in the kitchen humming, all that you ever wanted from me was nothing.

A few days later, the couple laid in their shared bed that night just talking. They talked about anything that was on their minds or anything that they felt the other should know. These were the conversations

that Y/N knew the world would say were pointless. Yet, they meant everything to the couple and that was what mattered the most.

“I was thinking…” Tee trailed off making Y/N turn her gaze up to him. She could tell that he was hesitating if he wanted to say what he had originally planned.

Y/N moved her hand up from his bare chest to right under his jaw, while his hand slid down to her mid-forearm. “About?” she urged in a quiet tone to not disrupt the conversation between them.

“Marry me?” He asked quietly that Y/N almost missed what he had said. She looked at him with her mouth parted a bit, not expecting it to come out that easy. “I know it isn’t an ideal proposal and I had a big thing planned out for Christmas but- “

“Yes,” Y/N cut him off making his place his attention on her. “Yes, I’ll marry you.”

Tee smiled before leaning over and grabbing a small box out of the bedside table. He easily opened it and slipped the diamond ring on Y/N’s left ring finger. Once it was placed, he put the box on the side and pulled her into him. Before pulling her into a kiss and moving to hover over her.

“I love you.” Y/N spoke quietly not to break the intimateness between the two.

“I love you more.” Tee promised before pushing their lips back together so they could spend some quality time celebrating the fact that they had gotten engaged in secret while sharing their sweet nothings that the world would never know about.

The next morning, Y/N had woken up before Tee and decided to cook breakfast for them. As she got the ingredients out for their healthy breakfast, her eyes kept on glancing down at the rock on her finger. It was clear that it cost a pretty penny because of how big it is, Tee had no shame in spending a decent amount of money on designer jewelry, bags, and so on.

While cooking, Tee had gotten up and caught her humming in the kitchen this time. It seemed to be a tune of a song that she was due to record in a couple of days. He knew how her anxiety made her run through the music and the lyrics many times to ensure that she would not mess up when recording.

“Good morning.” He came up behind her and whispered, wrapping his arms around her waist. Setting his head on her shoulder to get a better look at her. “Sleep good?”

Y/N nodded a small smile gracing her face, “Better than normal.” She spoke truthfully. Leaning her head back as she spoke. “How much did this cost?” she asked quietly as she finished up breakfast wrapped in her fiancé’s arms.

Tee shrugged knowing you wouldn’t like the price. He had gotten it custom made when he had noticed you browsing previously, but he always acted like he never paid attention. “Not enough.” He replied instead of giving an actual number for the price.

Y/N placed the food on two separate plates and handed Tee his, to which he thanked her and gave her a kiss on the cheek before going to the table. “I feel like you’re saying that because you know you spent too much.” Tee didn’t reply, but memories about the two of you played through his mind. When you two met, you didn’t even realize that he was more than likely going to be drafted into the NFL. He had been to one of your shows, by accident, seeing as his best friend’s little sister liked her and it was when her career had first started. Ever since you two met, there has been an instant connection. Being friends and then becoming more, Y/N had never wanted anything from him, the same way he didn’t want anything from her.

Industry disruptors and soul deconstructors and smooth-talking hucksters out glad-handing each other and the voices that implore, "You should be doing more" to you, I can admit that I'm just too soft for all of it.

It was almost Christmas time, which was when Tee was going to originally propose. There had been many articles, posts, and even some discussion in a few podcasts if the couple was already engaged. Y/N knew that it was bound to happen when she wore her engagement ring but moved it to the middle finger during interviews. She was in no way embarrassed of Tee or how he proposed, she just wanted to keep the happy moments to themselves for a bit longer. Of course, her closest friends knew and so did Tee’s.

With the rumor of them already being engaged or fixing to be, came a lot more hate this time around. People were realizing that one of their favorite professional athletes was about to be officially off the market, and others were realizing it would be harder for break-up songs to be written. Coming with the hate were also articles and news media discussing how Y/N could never settle down because the listeners of her music would abandon her because of her finally getting a happy ending.

“I don’t think the relationship between Higgins and Y/L/N will last. She’ll need some new songs to write, and he’ll pull stunts that all professional athletes do. They’ll get bored and they’ll both be single. We just hope it’s before they actually tie the knot.” A few guys spoke in the video that Y/N had been tagged multiple times. Some of the comments were defending her, while others were tagging her just to nag about her. It was true that she had surpassed Tee in hate comments recently.

Tee walked in as you shut your phone off. You were too exhausted to cry, but it didn’t hurt any less. Y/N was growing a backbone when it came to her relationship, but it was hard considering she still cared too much about what other people thought. “I don’t understand why I can’t handle hate.” Y/N spoke as Tee took a seat right beside her and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “I guess I’m just too soft for it all.”

Tee placed a gentle kiss on your head, “It gets to everyone sometimes.” He mumbled making sure to give your shoulders a little squeeze. He knew that Y/N had trouble handling hate and he wished there was a way to make everyone treat everyone kindly. Sadly, that would never happen. “the ones that say things like that are unhappy.”

She nodded when he said that knowing he was true. You had to be unhappy yourself to try to tear other people or other relationships down. Along with jealousy being a big problem when it comes to two people being together.

They said the end is coming, everyone's up to something I find myself running home to your sweet nothings Outside, they're push and shoving, you're in the kitchen humming All that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing.

Y/N had finally admitted that she was engaged on an Instagram post, on Christmas Day. Many people were saying that Tee had proposed on Christmas Eve or the day that she announced she was engaged. She had decided to let her management take care of her Instagram after her last post, at least until her new album was released. This would give her time away from social media and she had also cancelled every interview that was before her album release. She agreed to still go live on certain socials to engage with her fans but taking a step back from monitoring any comments.

All the hateful words that were being said, were far from Y/N’s mind as she tucked away from her social media’s and stayed off YouTube. Also keeping the tv channels on music or cartoons instead of the news. All this had improved her mental health so much, not being able to see anything unless she wanted to.

“My momma is coming to stay for a few days.” Tee told Y/N as she walked into the Master bedroom where he was putting his laundry away. The little things that help her mentally are always what he did.

Y/N nodded, “Okay. You want me to set up the guest bedroom?” She asked as she went and joined him so they could get the job done quicker and together.

“Already did.” He replied as they both finished the job of their laundry.

It’s the small things that kept their relationship alive. The small gestures, the small touches, the small looks of adoration, the small conversations. The things that people wish, pray, and hope for in a relationship and they both get to have that.

Y/n had come to realize that the world and haters would never understand their relationship. Not the way that they do and even the way their friends see it. Their relationship was full of sweet nothings that the world would never understand. And Y/N was beyond thankful for their sweet nothings, because that was her home and Tee would always be her home.

[artem1sc0re]

Fuck it; live reaction to the bagley mission in legion (so essentially a yap session that’s a bit jumbled up, as I have a habit of jumping to conclusions and saying something that’s actually incorrect, if you will)

Through text.

(Entices you to read with a bagley doodle)

(POST LEGION CAMPAIGN SPOILERS‼️)

(6/9 memories in since I got the idea to do this at the last minute)

Honestly it’s kind of cute seeing what Bagley got up to as a human and the people he interacted with. Highlight for me was definitely number 6 and 5; he’s honestly so real for liking strawberries, also the entire interaction between him and Arthur as they rowed together was so so sweet

Also screw the Larsen parents, I feel bad for bagley (Bradley) considering he was probably neglected for more academic aspects and probably was the witness to his parents’ arguments considering that whole scene of being bluntly told his father was leaving for “someone he loves more”. I would gladly go to your matches with no hesitation little Brad☝️☝️

(7 memories in) WHAT?? NATALIE’S SKYE LARSEN?? HOW TF CAN YOU DOWNGRADE A NAME FROM SOMETHING LIKE NATALIE TO SKY?? THATS RIDICULOUS ☠️☠️

Skye Larsen assumption aside, I think he had another seizure which wasn’t nice judging by the amount of shifting in the audio 😞😞

[correction since that whole point was drastically incorrect: my attention span was out of the window when I listened to it, which led me to jump to conclusions and Bagley was not talking about Natalie. He was talking about Skye when Bradley proceeded to say “she did this! Someone stop her!”]

(Mission aside, the whole neural mapping concept and Bagley’s character is low-key making me inspired to write something)

(8 memories in) don’t tell me skye did what I think she did. I’m taking her out of the grave to shake her by the shoulders very aggressively, if that’s the case (What did I think she did? Non-consensually neural-mapped him like she did to her mum because oh yes daybreak! Progressive and amazing! Totally didn’t cost her entire family getting involved in her unethical shenanigans!)

(9 memories in) I am eyeing Skye like a hawk despite her already being dead years after this conversation

I feel so bad for Bradley ☹️☹️ because of what he’s been through, he had to give up his whole life including his hobbies, friends and partner; it’s breaking my heart to see because he seems like such a good drinking buddy and friend to have

(Post finding Bagley, so after meeting Bradley)

Well that whole conversation was heartbreaking asf. Who taught bagley how to output such heart string tugging monologues/pieces of dialogue, BECAUSE THATS TWICE HES DONE IT! (For me at least)

Fuck Skye Larsen tbh I can get why people hate her now

And it’s making me regret my decision of sparing her because that is in fact what I did (it’s fine though because doing a second playthrough exists)

ALSO ITS THE FACT THAT SHE PROFITED OFF OF USING HER OWN BROTHER AS A GUINEA PIG TO CREATE BAGLEY AS WELL, LIKE HELLO???

Edit: So ermm I played back the audios in chronological order and it just clicked to me that Skye Larsen was possibly digitally lobotomising Bradley for the sake of making Bagley due to the whole neural mapping thing. NOT VERY LOVELY! What the fuck Skye?! Not cool! If anything the whole thing of profiting off of her unethical practices of using her mother and own brother as well as her dog as Guinea pigs for this just enrages me

So yea as I said 8 memories in, she did in fact did this all without her brother’s consent!

Anyway yap session over, maybe someday I’ll rewrite this with my thoughts but this time more coherently

Thanks for taking some time out of your day to read this ヾ( ˃ᴗ˂ )◞

[tenderlyrenjun]

Married

(Jisung ver.)

minors + inactive/empty blogs do not interact; fic rec blogs do not reblog without comments

a/n: repost, sorry; if people still hate it, I’ll take it down but please stop telling me that my fics suck; please be nice, i'm having a rough time in life and I wrote this in like 2-3/ish days … I’ve just been thinking about Jisung a lot; I think he’s neat

word count: > 12k (sorry)

married (og, jeno ver)

edit: oppa kink removed.

includes … afab reader, tw jewellery, tw food (not in a sexual way) established relationship, unusually clingy jisung, non-marriage proposals, reciprocal ‘ooooh you want me so bad’ dynamic, better than gold TDS2 in BKK body rolls mention, implied (and wrong) experienced virgins, lots of making out, hair pulling, oral sex (m + f receiving), lowkey exhibitionism, sex in a supply closet, first times, ass grabbing, vague choking, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, thigh job (m + f receiving), fingering, lowkey size kink/difference, creampie consent – homophobes dni; mark + doyoung are gay

again, minors + inactive/empty blogs do not interact

“Hey, my dad said Doyoung asked you to be the ring bearer.”

Jisung tears his attention from the engineering student portal as you kick your way through the blankets, teetering candy boxes over a bowl of popcorn, path dimly lit by the TV and Renjun’s candles. He offered, about twenty minutes ago, before you stockpiled half his snacks on the couch with him, to gather the food, but you assigned him to pull out the cushions into a kind of bed setting. It only took a couple seconds, as it always does for him, which is why, since the last movie night, he’s had an inkling suspicion that you keep having him unfold the couch. That, or you want to keep him out of the kitchen, on account of all the times he dropped and sprayed soda all over the floor. He makes up for it!, he hopes, like earlier when he got all the snacks from the convenience store downstairs – at 10 PM, if he might add. Granted, his long legs make the trip shorter than if you went, with or without him. Actually, once, or twice, or a few times really, whenever you go with him on those allegedly short walks across the road, it extends an hour, two hours, past midnight, not that he minds. Jisung never minds; he uses it as an excuse to take a break from the studying he scarcely does – on the surface, of course. His more romantic side holds your hand and tells you that he just likes spending this time with you because you study too much at the lounge in Square Garden.

“Yeah,” Jisung answers, “Doyoung asked his morning.” He takes the candies from you first, then the popcorn, helping you settle comfortably below the thin throw blanket next to him. A soda can slides down with the new incline and he catches it with his foot, placing the bowl between your thigh and his, beside the other snacks. “Apparently, his fiancé didn’t confirm anything, and they were a party member short,” he shrugs. “Are you still the flower girl?”

You nod, “mmhmm,” then crack open the soda he caught; you put two straws inside, pulling the blue one (his) a little bit taller. “Jeno thought I was going to be a grooms-woman though and asked if we were walking down the aisle together.”

Jisung scrunches his nose. That doesn’t even make sense. You all – him, Jeno, you, Renjun, Jeno’s girlfriend, etc. – are attending the wedding from Doyoung’s side of the family, at an unequal ration (he and his fiancé have three grooms-people each; you wouldn’t be able to walk with Jeno). But he makes no corrective comment, instead slowly unwrinkling his mouth. “I don’t think his girlfriend would like that.” Because he wouldn’t like it very much, no matter how many times he tells you that he’s not a jealous guy.

Jisung quickly takes a small sip of Cola while you still have it in your hands, and you raise an eyebrow.

“Why? You don’t trust me?”

He slurps a little too hard, choking on the sudden rush of soda down his throat, and pulls off. “No, that’s not – of course, I do –“ Then, you start laughing, and he pushes your chest, another smile widening into his cheeks. “Ah, you’re so …”

“So what?” you bounce back, knocking your shoulder into him. “So lovely? So pretty? So Park Jisung’s girlfriend?”

Jisung catches you with both hands, an arm wrapping around your shoulders, his fingers grazing your cheek. He pulls a serious frown that doesn’t quite meet the curve in his eyebrow. “Mmhm, yeah,” he answers the last one, leaning in tighter. “You’re so Park Jisung’s girlfriend.” His lips almost touch yours, thumb tilting your face upward, breath a poor, poor substitute for your tongue. “Don’t forget it.”

You wrap your hand under his wrist, pushing his arm up a bit further. He casts his eyes toward yours for a second but sees you staring at his parted lips. Your tongue peaks its tip, briefly catching his most prominent tubercle. “Never.”

You make the first move, for him, thankfully, because he debated, too long, how to proceed with you still carrying the soda in your lap. His broad shoulders envelop you when you fist his hoodie, dragging him and the collar down, zipper chafing his bare sternum. Jisung braces a hand on the couch, somewhere near your hip that his index finger feels, steadying the both of you upright. It only lasts a second, before you both fall into the pillows, and the cushions barely support you two, so you cling to each other. He readjusts your hips under him, your knee bending to avoid the popcorn bowl, which probably already spilled. Your hand slips into the split ends of his hair and pulls, drawing out all his breath, making his hand slip under your ass.

Then you pull harder, and his breath becomes audible, becomes a moan.

You – and he – learned this evil little fact somewhere around the seventh month mark – his hair pulling kink. Jisung met you after a particularly long evening class, holding a thin bouquet of pink tulips and couple bracelets in his trench coat. He kissed the top of your head, an arm wrapped around your shoulders, hiding you and your backpack in his large jacket, on the way to his car. You made it to the restaurant about 10 minutes early, but the table ran late, so the both of you sat in the backseat, pointing out the moon in mirror’s reflection, talking and talking until you were no longer talking, kind of like now. And you pulled the ends of his hair, nails grazing into his scalp, to get him on top. You ended up being late to you reservation.

“J-Jisung,” you whisper, cut off by the harder he presses his lips.

He shifts around the couch, aligning you perpendicular to the snacks, better lit by the candlelight, straight against the original layout, your head on the arm rest now – all without breaking the kiss. And his hands get more frantic, taking away the soda, mauling your hips, flipping his fingers repeatedly over your waistband.

“Is this too far?” Jisung asks when his thumbs sink above your underwear. He can feel the tiny organza flowers bulging into his finger pads. You both have gone through most of the bases, with each other – been making out, hot and heavy, since your fourth date; groping each other over and under your clothes since the second month; touching each other a little more south since that seventh month mark. He has seen you naked, too! Well, mostly naked; sometimes you wear his hoodie or only your underwear, which leaves little to the imagination, but still, he hovers and asks.

Your eyes blink slowly, opening just a crack but so obvious in the dark. He waits for you to look at him, following you up his neck to his face. You bite your lip a tiny bit, right in the middle, almost imperceptible until you let go, and he pecks you once, pulling away just as quickly even though your lips trail after him.

“No,” you mumble, also fast, jutting out your chin to kiss him again, sliding your arms around his neck, hands down between his shoulder blades. “Jisung, please, keep going. I want – I want to –“ You suck in a breath and center yourself (and him). “I want you.”

Jisung grunts your name, popping his chest like a dance move before he locks himself onto you, rolling your torso with him. He presses your hips down, deeper into the couch. Your shins stand up, outlining him, giving his dick a small crevice between your pants against which to rub. Instinctively, he bites his lip – and yours, and you yelp, prompting him to apologize, but you yank him even closer, nails clawing into his cheeks. You slip your plump tongue into his mouth, drawing his out, and your lips feel even softer on his tongue as you kiss around it, kind of like that time you gave him head, back when you still lived in the dorms on campus. He barely fit those days, and each thrust would drag your lips back into your mouth with him; he basically trained you, since then, to take his entire length in one stroke. Same with his long fingers beneath your panties, which now unbutton your trousers. He crosses your leg one on top of the other, pausing, on his knees, to grind against your ass. And you both roll your eyes shut, incoherent mumblings spilling down both your tongues without the other to mash them away. Jisung dives down again, both hands shimmying off your pants while he kisses you, equally fervent.

But once he gets them down your ankles, your feet prepared to kick them off, the lights turn on.

“Oh!” Renjun groans from the entrance, a brown grocery bag covering his eyes as he makes his way into the kitchen behind the couch. “Could you not do that on the communal furniture? Please?”

Maybe Jisung takes Renjun’s words a little too closely to heart, or maybe he wants to save money by booking a multiroom suite with his friends, or maybe he really wants to make love to his beautiful girlfriend who he has known for years now, because he agrees with his friends on the shared unit, like his apartment with Renjun, for Doyoung’s weekend wedding in mid-Seoul near the Han River. Jaemin convinced everyone that they would need a place to rest and get dressed without having to make the hour/hour and a half drive back to their apartments in upper Seoul. The hotel also gives Jisung the excuse to sleep next to you (just sleep, Renjun glared, traumatized after your date night), which he absolutely loves, in a different way, laying on your chest, matching your breath, siphoning off some of warmth to you.

It was the first thing you both did when you got to your rooms – sleep.

Jisung dropped your duffel bag and his – both couple items – in an open armoire while you settled his smaller backpack on the vanity. Neither of you opened any bags, wordlessly and simultaneously collapsing on the singular king-sized bed. You sprawled out for a couple seconds, then searched for each other’s hands in the sheets. He turned to you first, after you intertwined your fingers, and kissed your knuckles, one at a time, doubling back on your ring finger. It made you giggle, which made him giggle.

“Ah, I like being here with you,” he confessed, flopping against the mattress again, brushing away his bangs from his forehead, a dumb, gummy smile spreading up his face.

He never told you this, but a few months into dating, when you accidentally stayed the night at his apartment for the first time, falling asleep on his full-sized bed while he finished a last-minute assignment, Jisung had this epiphany where he realized that he likes this, likes sharing a bed with you (he almost asked you to move in, but that would have been way too soon, especially for a couple of kids). Then, after he fixed your hair, tied it into a ponytail sometime before sunrise for a hiking date along the Yeongbong Peak Trail, he realized that he likes the intimacy of being with you, his girlfriend. And he finds himself, this weekend, on the second evening staying at the hotel, looking for all those moments of intimacy.

Like now, he sits on the end-of-the-bed bench, watching you fix your eye makeup in the mirror according to Doyoung’s navy and gold rehearsal dinner, matching a shimmering highlight with the trim in the slit of your maxi dress. You wore this same dress – and him the same matching suit – to some European restaurant with him a couple months ago. No special occasion that time; you just met him at a restaurant for date night after not seeing him all two weeks of midterm season. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, people said when he was younger and naïve and didn’t quite understand them enough to believe, but he got it instantly, in that moment, and essentially made a vow never to be that far from you again – probably why he seeks and prolongs these moments of intimacy, and why he likes your dress so much, among a few other reasons.

“Are you finished?” you call, a little garbled as your mouth hangs while you apply mascara.

“Almost.” Jisung looks down at the loose tie around his neck. “Just need to fix one last thing.” He looks back toward you, and you look beautiful and mostly finished, not that he knows, entirely, what look you will be completing. He just thinks you are always pretty. “Are you almost done?”

“Not really.” You pull away from the bathroom mirror, blinking a few times, then turn to him. “How does this look – Oh, are you not wearing the couple watch tonight?”

“No, I am.” Jisung points to his silver watch on the table at the other side of the room with his black blazer. “Are you wearing yours?”

You nod. “Yeah, I just need to add some lipstick and jewellery, and I’ll be done.”

Jisung stands up and crosses the room to get behind you. He lifts your hair in an impromptu ponytail, making sure to grab lowly as not to ruin what you have done so far. “I'll help you,” he half-requests, gently, already pulling your long necklace into place and clasping it at the perfect length. He spins you around to add the bracelets and watch, but you have yet to finish applying makeup, so he holds your hands and kisses you slowly, like the scene of a movie (or an artsy porno).

You put a hand on his arm, jerking him forward, leaning on the door frame. He tilts his head a little bit left, nose brushing into your cheek, and you copy him enough for him to feel your breath on his face. Ever since the first time he kissed you longer than a simple peck, Jisung has been obsessed with all the ways he can elongate a simple kiss. One way you do, and this doubles as giving him consent, is by wrapping your arms around his neck, which you do now, hiking your leg, through your slit, around his waist high up, practically sitting on the sink counter. It gives him a better angle, more comfortable, against the height difference, to bend his neck. Jisung hikes your other leg around his waist, sandwiching you between him and the wall, thigh supported by the sink, an ass cheek supported by his large hand, his pelvis pressing too tightly into yours. He brushes your hair to the side and presses a trail of quick kisses down your jaw that have your breath elevated, turning into whispered moans of his name that he has to kiss quiet.

You hold his chin still, about to return the trail of kisses, when three knocks hit the bedroom door.

“Are you guys do – Oh, come on,” Jeno groans, throwing his hands in toward the exit, swinging his entire body away from the bathroom (a private bathroom, Jisung mentally adds). “Wrap it up, people. Jaemin is one perfume spray from being ready, and we’re already five minutes late for the rehearsal dinner.”

Jeno leaves as quickly as he entered, but Jisung still scrunches his nose, making a small annoyed face at the door. You tap his arm quickly a few times, and he steps back, helping you hop down the counter.

“So … do you still need help?”

You deadpan at him. “Out.”

“Is it always that bad or am I just noticing it now?” you call from the bathroom again.

Jisung laughs and pauses the TikTok on his phone. “What? You don’t want to marry me?”

You point a half-used wet wipe at him, brown eyeliner smudged past the corner of your eyebrow. “You proposed to me twice!”

Jisung rolls his eyes and onto his stomach over the bed. “One of those doesn’t even count!” During your two-year anniversary picnic at the Han River, a few months ago, he proposed the idea of proposing when he saw a kid with a red candy Ring Pop. You didn’t turn him down, citing that you both already had platinum couple rings, and he proposed on the spot with his, even getting halfway down on a knee before you toppled him into the grass. Okay, maybe that one counts; Jisung rubs the back of his neck. “But all the aunties thought we were cute!” During the rehearsal dinner, they kept bringing up a follow-up wedding with all the couples – you and Jisung, Jeno and his girlfriend, Mark and his boyfriend. All of you treaded around the conversation, as if none of you have had The Talk with your partners yet, even though Jisung knows that Mark has a ring ready and Jeno has a date planned (and he has a proposal in mind).

You turn off the bathroom lights and quickly jump into the bed, hiding your bare legs under the blanket without him, fluffing his extra-large hoodie over your head.

Jisung frowns and scoots into bed with you. “Did it really bother you that much?” He knows that he jokes about marriage from time to time, probably brings it up one too many times, but he is serious about it. If you said yes, he would marry you in an instant. You would wait anyways, for a big ceremony, until the both of you finish your degrees and have jobs, him delayed a few semesters due to military service before school, but he would marry you in an instant. “I can talk to the aunties tomorrow, so they don’t bring it up again.”

“No, Sung,” you backpedal. “It’s just that I never noticed it before. Of course, I want to marry you. We’ve just never really talked about the details before. We don’t even live together.”

Jisung settles into the pillows, dragging you down with him, into his arms. “We could,” he whispers. And you look up at him, eyes wide, a hand over his on your stomach. “Move in, and talk about all the details. We could move in together, you know. Maybe not on Monday or anything, but, like, next semester or next year, or something like that. We could wait until after college, too, if –“

“Jisung?”

“… Yeah?”

“I love you.”

Jisung sighs, in relief this time, melting a little bit deeper into the mattress, free hand taking his forehead temperature. “I love you, too.” He rolls on his side and buries his face in your neck, curling his long leg over your bare thighs. You comb his hair behind his ear a few times before he starts kissing your neck, sneaking into the hoodie with you – there’s enough room for two people if he squeezes.

“Jisung,” you sigh quietly. He looks up, catching you close your eyes, mouth parting enough for your tongue to peek out a bit, flat with the way you bite it. And he kisses your neck again, a quick, wet one, licking his lips so closely that his tongue catches your skin. Sometimes he doesn’t have exactly the right words, so he rambles through the entire dictionary until he finds the right one. He also really likes kissing you. “Jisung,” you sigh again, a little bit louder, more enunciated over the wet smacks that he tries to make chaste, given the brief conversation about marriage. “Mmm, Jisung.”

But like he said, he would marry you in an instant.

Jisung kisses your neck a little longer, a little harder, slipping around the column to find a perfect vein that makes you whimper his name exactly the same again. And pliantly, your head lulls into his palm, kissing his life lines almost deliberately. Jisung turns you back to him with the same palm, pyjama pants rolling your legs open, wide enough for him to slip between. He grinds down, the first kiss to your lips, fingers coiling in the hair behind your head, freehand pulling a thigh up his back. You seem to get the hint, tying your feet on his spine, pushing your heels down to trap him.

“If we – if we move in together,” you breathe, eyes closed, lips pursed, “I don’t think we’ll get very much sleep – Jisung – ah!”

Jisung coasts his throbbing boner through your lips, milling his pants against your underwear. His waistband starts folding over itself, exposing his Adonis belt further and further and further, until his ass is half out, almost matching the way your underwear tangles between your cheeks. He brings you up closer, pulling your head off the pillows, fully kneeling, making indents in the sheets.

“I want it,” he tells you, hauling you into his lap, making you straddle him backwards, “I want to move in together, to sleep together, to sleep together.” He squeezes you against the headboard, quietly banging it against the wall just once, then louder a second time as you meet him, equally, trying to fuse your bodies together. His hands start roaming, and your hands start roaming, only settling on the best place to knead each other – his broad shoulders and your ass. “I’m not just saying it, I promise.” You stare at him a few milliseconds, searching his eyes, then kiss him even rougher, making him lose balance, and he accidentally kicks the headboard harder.

“We’ll talk about it later,” you tell him, mouths misaligned, kissing around his cupid’s bow specifically. And Jisung sucks in a huge breath, holding it right there in his chest, gravitating the entire Earth’s rotation around his, well, his penis, the lifeline, right now, to his brain and heart. Then you whisper, “I want it, too. All of it,” and he exhales and flips you on your back, making you yelp and giggle, which makes him giggle.

“Right now, I want you.”

Jisung leans down again, half a centimeter from your lips … when a loud bang comes from the adjourning wall, accompanied by your names. He looks up at it, mouth still puckered, hoping that the sound came from you two. Sensing nothing, he kisses you again, and a moan escapes him, and the banging comes back.

"Jisung," Jaemin shouts. “I can’t tell if you’re just watching porn too loud or you’re trying to have sex in a hotel room that you share with your best friends, but it’s 3 AM, and we have to be up at 7 for the wedding, so, for the love of God, please go to sleep.”

You laugh out loud, and Jisung covers your mouth with one hand. Then, as expected, Jaemin hits the wall again.

“Hello?? What did I just tell Jisung?”

“Yo!” Mark wanders into your room, eyes covered his long blond hair and a single hand. The other blindly feels around the air, as not to bump into anything, but he still hits the end-of-the-bed bench where yours and Jisung’s clothes are neatly packed in black suit protector bags. “Are you decent?” he asks, stopping in place, “The guys sent me to see if you’re ready yet.” He spins his wrist in the air. “Something about not wanting to deal with –“ Mark takes a chance and peaks through his fingers … only to find you and Jisung sharing wired earbuds, laughing at a stupid, silly, little TikTok. He breathes a quick sigh, petting down his chest, then deadpans and grabs a pillow, throwing it at you two. “Hey!” He snaps his fingers. You both finally look up. “Time to go, losers. My boyfriend’s already pulled the car around; Jeno left 30 minutes ago; and the makeup artists started on the Doyoung's fiance’s groomsmen.”

You and Jisung make no move to get up.

“Hello? Now, please,” Mark practically orders.

“Um,” Jisung squeaks. He scrunches his nose, pressing his tongue on his bottom lip, in lieu of biting. It’s still a bit swollen from last night, when you both kept kissing each other through messy hand jobs, wanting the first time that you actually have real, penetrative sex to be more freeing. But still, he did have sex last night, and the reminders show, under the blanket, where you don’t wear pants. “Can you give us, like, two minutes to get dressed?” He gestures to the heap of blankets.

Mark throws his head back. “You’re not even dressed? Of course, you’re not.” He groans. “Okay, you have five minutes to be downstairs, or you’re driving yourselves.”

The moment Mark walks out the door, Jisung asks, “Should we just Uber there?”

You smack him with a pillow. “The makeup artist has to get both of us ready. We’re in the wedding party.” Jisung flails over that pillow, making you drop it, and you roll your eyes, getting up like Mark requested.

“Ugh.” He hugs the pillow tightly, covering the dick imprint in his boxers. “The wedding doesn’t even start until 3. We could have time to just …” Jisung watches you take off your sticky black panties and pull on even smaller ones, words trailing off, because now his 7 AM boner remembers how he kissed you until 5 AM; how your hands squeezed above his balls, while he slid his entire length in the crevice of your thigh; how he fingered you with three long digits, thumb pinching down on your clit. Then you catch him staring a little south of the hoodie you stole from the last time he did laundry (Thursday, when you slept over), and he finishes his sentence. “To – to just re-relax.”

You roll your eyes again and put on the Adidas sweatpants that Jisung bought you a few months ago. “Let’s go, Jisung.” And he rolls his eyes, sticking his tongue out his jaw.

"Fine, but you owe me a kiss."

Jisung accepts, or, really, takes his kiss, outside the hotel. He stops you a couple steps down the short perron, dress storage bag, hitting his thigh from how fast he moves. And - while Mark leans against his boyfriend's car, calling Renjun and Jaemin down, who are also late - Jisung gives himself the time, the moment, to pucker his lips.

But it turns into a longer kiss, backing up Renjun and Jaemin, who were not as late as he thought.

“Two and a half years, and you still suck face? Are you two even dating or just making out all the time?” Renjun shakes his head sarcastically. And Jisung pushes him into Jaemin, who catches him easily.

“Ay-yo??” Mark calls from the street, hand over his eyes like a visor. “We’re late, let’s goooo.”

In the car, Mark and his boyfriend take the driver and passenger seats, obviously, and Jaemin and Jeno’s girlfriend sit in the pop-up row in the trunk, leaving you, Renjun, and Jisung – the smallest and tallest of the group – in the middle, much to Renjun’s protest. Though, he only jokes about this stuff; he actually thinks that the both of you are “so cute” if his cuteness aggression is anything to go off. Sometimes he throttles you two, and Jisung is scared that he might get bitten (by someone who isn’t you).

The drive to the venue (re: other hotel) is only 15 minutes, so everyone tries to stay silent, on their phones, still waking up, not even properly dressed, but Jisung, of course, breaks it, laughing and mouthing stop through his gummy smile after you respond to his TikTok.

[Boyfriend ♡, 7:13 A.M.]

hey, look at this

[Boyfriend ♡, 7:13 A.M.]

https://tiktok...com

[Girlfriend ♡♡, 7:14 A.M.]

Are you trying to tell me something?

[Girlfriend ♡♡, 7:15 A.M.]

Andy Park? 🤨

“Ah, stop,” Jisung blushes. He rubs up your thigh and buries his face in your neck, lips curling into your skin prominently enough to act like another kiss. You sneak your hand around his head, combing out his bed hair.

“What?” you whisper in his ear, brushing away the longer strands. “Not going to propose a third time?”

Jisung covers your mouth and presses a quick kiss to your neck. “Someone’s going to hear you.” If it were any other situation, he would take you on the suggestion, half-jokingly proposing with whatever couple ring he happened to be wearing at the time. Mostly, he wants it to be an intimate proposal, just the two of you, eyes on each other; the after party, when you tell everyone, can be the bigger affair, but Jisung wants to see the ring slide down your finger and hear your answer clearly with his own ears. He peeks an eye and finds you already staring at him, cooing. “Why? Do you want me to propose again?”

Dramatically, you take off your ring and plop it in his palm. He laughs, audibly, breaking the silence again, but slips it down your finger regardless.

“Ehhh,” you grimace at it, playfully, twirling your hand in the sunlight, “Same ring.”

Jisung grabs you by the neck and kisses you quiet this time, only pulling away to peck your lips repeatedly. His thumb brushes into your cheek, fingers drawing you in, tilting your head at the perfect angle to slip his tongue down your throat. Your head falls pliantly, supported by his wrist that you hold, following every twist and turn he makes to kiss you harder.

“Okay! Here! Everyone out of my car!” Mark’s boyfriend shouts, loudly shifting the car into neutral a few steps from the Grand Hyatt Seoul. He looks pointedly at you and Jisung breathing heavily through the rearview mirror. “Especially you two.”

[Girlfriend ♡♡, 12:14 P.M.]

Meet me in the lobby

[Girlfriend ♡♡, 12:14 P.M.]

I have a surprise for you ^^

Jisung waits on a cushion bench, fully dressed in his navy tuxedo, silver accessories hidden under his sleeves and high collar to accommodate Doyoung's wedding theme. He scrolls back through your car ride conversation, since he has the time, smiling to himself, curling into himself, covering his mouth as he kicks his feet forward like a middle schooler with a crush.

You are continuously cute in his eyes, and, as he relives this reminder of just how cute you are, Jisung doesn't know how he got so lucky. Sure, yeah, you two make out ... a lot, as Renjun pointed out, but he also finds you incredibly compatible. You send him pictures of the moon at night and the sun in the morning; you go out with him at 1 in the morning to the good fish-shaped bread cart (the one by Jamsil stadium after all the concerts neither of you attended); you cheer his name after all the physics exams on which he tries his best.

Really, Jisung could go on forever and ever, gushing about pretty much every aspect of your relationship. He loves you so much. And he used to, back when you first started dating, and he still does during your anniversaries (100 days, 6 months, 1 year, etc.). All his friends complain, especially the bitchless ones (Renjun, Haechan, and Jaemin), but he wants you in his life for as long as you'll have him.

“Were you going to text me?”

Jisung jumps in his seat, automatically locking his phone. He relaxes though, the next second, when he sees you, and scoots over enough for you to sit with him.

But you keep standing.

And he raises an eyebrow.

“What are you –“

You kick your foot up, through the slit of your dress. Jisung thinks you wear these dresses often, which he likes, never mind that Doyoung picked this dress out - a fact he tries to ignore, even though he's pretty sure that he confided this secret to his friends and Renjun probably let it slip after a few drinks.

You catch your ankle, showing off the white bottoms under your heels, below the pretty, silver watch that you will have to take off before the ceremony. Jisung, on instinct, hold you steady first, seeing signs of imbalance in your face. He waits until you lean on him more before looking at your foot.

"Why are - Andy?" he reads, vertically down your foot. It takes him a second to react, chest pounding fast, first, mind going blank, eyes flying to search your smiling face. Then, he returns it - your smile. "Ah, you're so cute."

Jisung pulls you into his lap, like a princess on his knee, and kisses you fast. He might have you repeat this when you actually get married, already filing a mental note to save the TikTok for inspiration. For now, though, he can just pretend - pretend that you did this for your wedding, pretend that you will talk down the aisle for him today (well, you go first, so he will meet you at the first row in front of the alter today), pretend that your white-ish dress is for him, pretend that your current rings carry even more permanent meaning than they already do.

You laugh between the repeated pecks, trying to pull away, but he has you vice gripped close by his chest. “You’re so clingy this weekend, Park Jisung.” And he draws back first, briefly looking at you before burying his face in your neck, arms dropping down your waist. “Someone might think you actually like skinship.” You laugh again and comb his hair.

Jisung squeezes your waist, just once, breathlessly laughing with you. He knows – he knows that he isn’t really known for skinship, having waited days, in the beginning, to hold your hand, not even kissing you until your fourth date; and he knows that he has been obsessed with you these last few days, so he kisses your neck again and confesses, “I just … I just …” He sucks in a breath. “Ah, I just want you,” he finishes lamely. “Can we stay a little bit longer? Here, at the venue, without … everyone else?”

You pinch his cheeks upward, puckering his lips at which you coo. “Did you want to get married today, too?” you giggle. And he almost hides behind your hair, if it weren’t neatly tied up, braided forward to your temples, but also, you hold him as steady as he hugs your waist. He wouldn’t mind, you know, getting married today, after Doyoung; the only people missing, right now, are his siblings (and a few other people); he might want to buy you a new ring really quick though. “Hmm? What’s up, babe?”

“Everyone will be gone,” he says simply, and you relax your fingers curiously onto his shoulders, fumbling the lapels. “From the hotel, they’ll be gone. Most of them are leaving during the dinner, and Mark’s already packed up his boyfriend’s car with their bags. We’ll have an entire suite to ourselves; we won’t have to check out until tomorrow morning.” Jisung swallows and licks his lips, giving himself a beat of reprieve before his tongue goes numb, making it impossible to voice the reason for his request. You stare at him, wide eyed and nodding, urging him to go on, even though it looks like you already know what he wants to ask, even though he feels too scared to ask. “We could, um, we could – oh, God.” He likes to think that, since you’ve been dating for almost three years, he has gotten past most of the nervous, honeymoon stuttering, but he (loves you so much) takes a deep breath and starts again, rushing through, “Wecouldhavesex.”

And you giggle.

He wishes you wouldn’t. It sets a bad precedent for the activity he wants to do; albeit, you didn’t laugh those other first times – when he kissed you, when you sucked him off, when he fingered you. So, really, Jisung has no reason to worry. He just needs to suggest it again, calmly.

“We could use the hotel room, later,” he alludes, monitoring your reaction closely, involuntarily stiffening his fingers through your silky, pale gold dress. You give him more encouraging tiny nods, leaning in with each micro-adjustment, and he copies you, nodding to himself, giving himself the same support. “To have sex,” he whispers, then repeats, louder, “Make love. Do you … want to …?”

You exhale shakily, and he hadn’t realized you were holding your breath. “Yeah,” you sigh. “Yes, definitely.” You grab his face, and he wants to propose again, possibly for real, to see you react like this again, possibly more enthusiastic. “Jisung, I love you,” you say obviously, honestly, “Of course I want to have sex with you,” you whisper the last bit, like him, and he kisses your shoulder, suppressing his gummy smile briefly.

“Give me your ring.”

“Whoa?” You blink. “Just because I said yes? Park Jisung, I never thought of you as a player.” You giggle again and hand over the mismatched ring regardless, probably already knowing the question he has written across his face.

He almost apologizes, for not having a new present, a new ring, something new to give you for another relationship marker, but he changes his mouth to say your name and holds out the jewllery between his thumb and index finger, which are shaped like a heart, nail pushing the center design at you. “Will you,” he pauses, dramatically, muffling a sheepish laugh. “Will you,” he restarts, “make love to me tonight, in the hotel room – our hotel room, after the wedding?”

You roll your eyes and push his shoulder, but he stays still, keeping himself upright to drag an answer out of you. And you answer again, definitively, “Yes, Park Jisung, I will make love to you tonight in our hotel room.”

Except, after the wedding, past the foyer at the reception hall, you almost fuck your boyfriend in a supply closet. He’d only been dancing in the makeshift mosh pit with his friends, jacket fallen down his shoulders, mostly sheer white shirt exposing his toned humerus. They kept cheering him on through the popping and locking and body rolls as he wore a pair of cheesy, blue party glasses that Doyoung placed on all the tables with dessert. Then, the DJ – Doyoung’s friend Johnny from high school – slowed the melody, pulling all the couples onto the dance floor.

All the couples except you because you stole Jisung’s hand and dragged him out one of the smaller doors behind the furthest unoccupied tables. He tripped over a few chairs on the way, praying that no one heard him, trying to catch up the half-step you have on him, wondering what dastard plans you have on your mind.

“What are you –“

“It’s such a crime,” you tell him, shoving him against a poorly lit shelf, inhaling his lips, running your fingers along his torso, finding the best place to hold him. The door slams loudly, which is oddly comforting, to give you both some privacy. And he drops his hands from surrender onto your shoulders, relaxing you enough to continue talking through the kisses. “You look so good, too good, Park Jisung, and you dance so well. God,” you moan into his mouth, ridiculously close that he can feel your boobs squish on his chest. “I know, we’re waiting for tonight and tomorrow, and – and –“ You pull back swallowing, realigning your breath. Jisung licks his lips. He’s been the one to kiss you all weekend, to initiate it all weekend, so he gets hard, instantly, when you return the same energy, finding him as hot as he finds you. “We’re waiting,” you reiterate, and he presses his forehead against yours, “but – but can you do that dance move again – that body roll again,” you glance at him through your lashes, “on me?”

“Here?”

You nod, biting your lip. “If you don’t – we don’t have to; we can go back. I just – Jisung, ah, fuck.”

You rarely swear, never finding a reason unless you’re frustrated or really turned on, and Jisung always wants to hear it, claiming that you sound really sexy when you say things you’re not supposed to, especially, like in this case, when you are doing things you’re not supposed to. So rather than responding, he complies, pulling his face down, legs pliéd to accommodate your height, then rolls once, thigh grazing through the slit in your dress, dragging it up and behind your waist.

Jisung groans, deeply, pausing to settle his nerves. He repeats, even closer, grinding across your chest, twisting your dress around the buttons of his shirt. And you fall into him, a hand braced on the shelf behind his elbow. Jisung bites his lip. Something juxtaposes deeply in this moment, but he cannot place his finger quite on it. He feels like a middle schooler again, waiting to kiss the prettiest person at the party; he also feels like a teenager with raging hormones, back to 19 right before his military service, jacking off in his room with lotion and a box of tissues; but he also feels like an adult (or the most adult a person in their 20s can feel) in an adult relationship doing adult things. So he does it again – the body roll, breathing into your mouth, chasing your lips down for another kiss.

“I don’t want to make love to you in here,” he whispers, despite rolling his fully hard dick in the crevice between your thigh and vulva. Jisung fists your dress at your waist, bunching it higher. Your panties expose, thin and transparent. His resolve nearly falters, almost completely fucking you in this supply closet with his family and closest friends a few meters away. He kisses you again and again, burying his words with his tongue down your throat, exhaling shakily. Then, he shakes his head, slowly pulling away, holding your face in place, hand around the front of your neck. Jisung opens his eyes and finds you already looking at him, your fingers wrapping around his wrist one by one. “I want you –“ He brushes a strand of hair behind your ear, that fell out of a tight braid. “– so bad, you have no idea.” He grinds his dick up your leg as proof. “But not here, not like this.”

“I know. I don’t want it like this either,” you tell him, smoothening the wrinkles in his shirt, staring down his chest. “I just … You looked so hot out there, and, God, Ji, I want you so, so bad, too.”

Jisung brings his hands down, fumbling this thumbs back and forth across your hips, your dress bunched up as you practically sit on his lap while he barely sits on a half-empty shelf. You snake your hands behind his neck, fidgeting with the tag in his coat. He tries to fight the smirk that appears in the corner of his mouth, sweeping his long hair in front of his eyes, but you catch him and bury your face in his neck this time.

“Don’t make fun of me,” you whine, voice going up an octave at the last syllable. You tease him more than he teases you, verbally at least (he likes to think that he does more than you in bed), so he’s not entirely accustomed to his whiny girlfriend, and he kinda likes it.

“Never,” he tells you, sarcastically, chuckling a hair away from your lips before he kisses you again. “I like that you think I’m sexy.” He smirks, inhaling a deep embrace, literally taking your breath away with a slow and gentle kiss. You moan into his mouth, mumbling his name between colorful expletives. It lets him slip his tongue inside, confidently, crushing his lips harder and harder, needing you to come equally closer, to ease the pressure on his dick. He knows – he knows what he just said, but, “We don’t have to … have sex in here,” he tells you, whispering like it’s a bad word. “There are other things we can do.” He groans, throatily, chest rising faster.

You’ve done worse, honestly, in worse places than dry humping in a supply closet at a family friend’s wedding. He can think of several blow jobs in the library’s reference section (which has no cameras, by the way); or that time he held a vibrator on you the entire Starbucks drive-thru, resulting in him plastering his failed differential midterm over the windows as a cover up while he ate you out in the back seat. Actually, just last Tuesday too, at the gym, after he locked the door to a communal weight lifting room, you bounced on his long, agile fingers. Granted, it was 4 AM, so the place was already empty, save for a couple employees, thus easing his anxiety. And you could do it again, right now. You don’t have to take his dick inside your cunt, but you could give each other sloppy hand jobs, using spit as lube (or not; he's probably leaking so much pre-cum). The thought makes his knees buckle, making the both of you stumble.

“Sor –”

You cut him off with another kiss, your fingers flying to his pants, undoing his fly quickly. He grunts, involuntarily thrusting up. His dick was already pointing tip-up, the entire length, even flaccid, unable to sit snugly otherwise in his pants. You curl your nails in his waistband, scratching under his boxers. He nods his head, mouth parted, gasping, giving you all the green lights to touch him more, which you do, sliding one hand down his pants and the other onto his cheek, allowing you to deepen the kiss. Jisung grunts, again, plump lips biting your tongue, and he copies you, one hand behind your neck, under your head, anchoring himself to this moment (also, before he completely evaporates).

“Shh,” you whisper, mouthing across his jaw. “We have to be quiet.” But you make it hard for him (pun intended), holding your thumb on his throbbing slit, breaking his pre-cum into uneven globs down the sides. “Everyone keeps interrupting us, baby," you pout.

You take your hand off his dick and bring it to your mouths. He watches you, intently, lick your palm, pink tongue peeping just above the web in your hand, and he falls – not literally. Jisung bends in half, lowering himself to your boobs, silently thanking your heels, which have his name branded on the bottom. He kisses the highest part on your dress, halfway down your chest, then slides the straps down your pretty arms. You repeat his name, verbally – his proper name, after he takes a nipple in his mouth, tongue flat against it, massaging the entire areola. He sucks lightly, hollowing his cheeks, bobbing up and down, opposite hand enveloping under your unattended tit, but he’s too big, as is everything about it, and his palm rests on your ribs. His thumb and index finger pinch repeatedly, automatically, increasing hardness each time a digit swipes over your nipple. You have to bite your hand to stop from moaning too loud.

“Jwiseong,” you stammer, accented by the muffle.

You edge a little closer to him, pushing the shelf into his lower back, and he yelps. But it comes out as groan, vibrations making you match him. Jisung stands up fully again, taking a wide step on the outside of your thighs. He grabs you by the face, kissing you in the way he has been all weekend, a hand behind your neck and another supporting you by the ass, this time dipping you toward the ground. His cock flops completely out the fly of his pants, balls still trapped behind the slit in his boxers. The heavy air hits the veins in his dick first before it rubs against your inner thighs, and you squeeze them around him, both of you groaning, your skimpy underwear adding friction for both of you. Jisung moans your name, accidentally biting your bottom lip. But you say nothing, instead wrapping your arms around his neck, doing your best to slide his cock between your thighs. And he grunts. He can feel his cock pulsing to release.

“Jisung,” you mumble more coherently, “Jisung, Jisung,” you half-chant between kisses, but every time you open your mouth, he slips his tongue in farther, twisting inside your mouth, licking behind your teeth, goading your tongue inside his mouth to suck on. Your panties twist at the crotch, like a substitute thong, and his long cock, ridges and all, rubs your clit to ass and back again. “Jisung,” you moan again. “Jisung, you can’t cum – you can’t – oh, my God, Jisung,” you whisper-shout, forcing him to kiss you harder. He can’t cum on your clothes.

“I know,” he mumbles, giving your tongue one last suck before he pulls back, sitting on the same half-empty shelf, you back on his lap/ish. He lightly fingers away the hairs curtaining the front of your face, tucking the thicker ones behind your ear. “I know,” he repeats. You’ve given him thigh jobs before, humping between his legs, which landed cum on your ass, and letting him hit doggy style, which landed cum on your stomach. So, here, in the random supply closet, it – his cum – would ruin both of your outfits, something you wouldn’t be able to explain on your goodbye rounds. And he cums so much (it was embarrassing the first time, then he found out how much you liked it). Jisung glances at his cock, shortly, jumping between it and your face. He steadies his breathing and takes off his jacket; he undoes more buttons down his pecs and rolls up his sleeves. “It’s so … hot in here,” he justifies.

You nod, pulling at your dress. And he sees it – the wrinkles in the skirt, the slit pushed toward your strapless bra, your panties even tinier.

“You can cum in my mouth,” you whisper thickly, “so – so you don’t stain your tux.”

“We could just go back to our hotel,” he offers instead, really feeling the need to cum elsewhere.

“You’re fine walking out with this –“ You slide your hand down his penis, fingers not entirely touching despite getting tighter at the base. “– poking everyone in the eye?”

“N-no, yeah, you’re right. Please let me cu-cum down your throat.”

You rearrange your dress comfortably folded beneath your knees, hit jacket adding extra padding. Jisung sucks in a breath, then even more when you swallow the entirely of his dick, or whatever you can, stuttering halfway down. It seems he got bigger, all his cum girthing at the tip, waiting to flood. You skip the foreplay, the teasing, immediately hollowing your cheeks around the bit you can get in your mouth without destroying your esophagus (again, you still have to say your goodbyes), but he still grips the shelf behind him, knuckles turning white. Jisung bites his lip, forcing himself to keep his eyes open, to watch his sexy, sexy girlfriend blow him, so that he cums fast. In almost any other scenario, it would be embarrassing how fast he cums, especially with how much volume he expels, but you make it so difficult not to overflow the crevices of your mouth. You press your tongue under his cock, sucking in your lip over your top row of teeth, feeding his cock down your throat, and massaging the half you can’t take. He feels a vein scrape the corner of your mouth and twitches forward, pushing more dick inside. Your eyes water a little bit, lashes blinking them away, so he takes over, slowly thrusting his cock to gauge how much teeth with graze it on the drawback. Once he finds the perfect length, he sets a faster pace, squeezing cute little dimples in his ass until he grunts erratically, incredibly close to cumming.

“Almost there,” he whimpers. He knows that he sounds frustrated, but it’s not at you, never at you. He just wants to make love to you in your hotel room right now. “So close,” he pleads, again not at you, more at himself.

You pull off his cock and open your mouth wide, as circular as possible, and he grabs his dick back, rubbing your spit and cum and his pre-cum up his length, pointing the tip inside your mouth. The first rope shoots down your throat perfectly, then the next rope lands on your tongue. It keeps sputtering out this way, like a spray bottle, until it doesn’t, and his cum clings to his cock, dribbling down his veins, prompting you to lick him clean.

And you make eye contact the entire time, which makes his cock twitch. After you finally finish cleaning him off, you stand up and show him all the collected cum in your mouth, holding your tongue still like a cup. Jisung grabs your neck, holding your pliant head as you swallow what you can, in two breathy gulps. He wipes a little excess bubble from the corner of your mouth to inside, then presses a kiss on your neck, squeezing your collarbone, tighter with his thumb.

“Mmm,” he grunts. “My turn.”

Jisung sinks to his knees, pushing your hips against the shelf. He slides your skirt to the side, making a bigger slit for him to get under, and raises your leg over his shoulder. Slowly, your fingers tread into his hair, pulling at the top. He falls forward, closer to your wet pussy, lips ghosting a breath on labia. Jisung tilts his head to the side and wraps his tongue around the crotch of your panties, a teasing excuse to pull them out, to give him better access, his wide tongue swiping your skin briefly.

“Jisung,” you whine, shaking your butt on the shelf. “Hurry.”

He laughs. “Shh, no one can know we’re in here.”

Jisung pushes his middle finger inside your cunt, gradually making the interphalangeal creases disappear, moaning when you do. Outside, he kisses your vulva, jaw coming up, raising his tongue to your clit. He flicks it with his entire tongue, desperately sucking the little knob between his lips. You tug his hair again, and he swears that his dick twitches – not a good sign, so he works faster, adding a second finger. He sucks again and again, releasing your labia with suctioned gasps, working his nimble digits knuckle-deep repeatedly. In, out, in, out, halfway in, out, all the way in, out, in again.

His knuckles hit your pussy harder and harder, confining him to the small space as your leg wraps around both of his shoulders rigidly, his hot breath sighing back in his face. Jisung hums again on your clit before sucking harsher, lips biting every time his mouth turns into the flat part of his tongue to the tip to nothing, then back again. When he feels your feathery walls squeeze his fingers, he adds a third, despite the taut stretch. He presses all three to the roof of your vagina and curls, flexes each one in different directions, tickling that spongy little spot if two happen to land on it simultaneously. Your legs stiffen and shake side-to-side, but he keeps going, goes faster, not slowing down.

Until you relax.

Your legs go numb, and you almost fall off the supply shelf, so he holds you up, still licking your vulva clean as you cum and cum and cum across his lips.

It takes you pulling his hair again to stop him. And Jisung stands up, breathing just as heavily. He hugs you closely, around your waist, and you bring your hands to his arm. Both of you stabilize your breaths to each other.

You move first, brushing his hair out of his eyes. “We should go say bye to everyone.”

Jisung nods, blindly, not fully coherent enough to process the suggestion. He is trying to lengthen his refractory period, make his partially hard cock go back down. You’re so sexy, too sexy right now, and he desperately needs a bed to make love to you.

“So we can get back to the hotel,” you clarify, voice light.

And suddenly, Jisung is halfway through tugging on his jacket and ordering an Uber.

It takes every nerve, every ounce of self-control for Jisung to make it through goodbye rounds.

The first thing you did, before the rounds, other than sanitize your hands or fix your outfits, was drink water and pop a breath mint from the dessert table, then he kissed you quick, mumbling some random excuse about a mouth check, which turned into a five minute make out session halfway out the door that Jaemin commented on, on his way out. Even one of the groom’s cousins mentioned how he – Jisung – is always touching you, always has a hand attached to you, despite not even really liking to share food.

Chenle, he thinks, was the sole person to explicitly say something, catching onto Jisung’s mismatched buttons and your new ponytail, frizzy curls hanging loose. Jisung prayed his hands together, begging his best friend not to say anything. So he didn’t. But Jisung knew that he would hear all about it on Monday, from everyone in his friend group.

Jisung could only get through two or three more conversations, suddenly feeling like a kid trying to leave the Chuseok dinner, before his cock (which never fully went down, by the way) started straining his pants again, the idea of getting you in his bed as the single motivator to leave as soon as possible. He ended up pushing you, by the waist, in front of his crotch to protect his decency, no longer carrying his jacket because you wear it, because Chenle pointed out some discoloration, another bump low on your neck. You spoke for him, lying to all the aunties that he drank too much or danced too hard. They believed you, especially after he giggled into your shoulder, snapping his body in half to lean on you. It hurt his ego that they believed you so easily, but he’ll deal with all those feelings later. Everything else drowns into white noise, going in on ear and out the other, almost forcibly removed by the horny hormones his hypothalamus orders.

Also, he really wanted to avoid clean up duty. His hands need to be clean for post-nuptial activities, you know.

You have to know by the time he gets you in the elevator to your hotel room, your shared hotel room. He backs you into a corner under the camera, at the blind spot. You look up at him, wide-eyed, gasping when he rubs his thigh between your legs. He grunts, deeply, softly, and kisses you quiet. And he thinks, there have been way too many situations this whole weekend where you were required to be silent. But still, you moan and raise your arms around his neck (and he hopes that the security cameras are old and have no sound). Then, in his next move, your elbow accidentally hits an extra button.

“Are you sure about this?” Jisung breathes as the doors open to the third floor. Your room is on the seventh.

“Yes, of course.” You frown, brushing your hair through the middle, resting your arm on his broad shoulder. “Why?”

He scrunches his nose. “Just making sure you’re not looking for a way out or anything.” He tilts his head to the going up sign, and you hit his arm.

“I told you not to make fun of me,” you pout.

“Sorry, sorry,” he laughs, then kisses you again.

And he doesn’t stop kissing you all the way to your room. Just changes the location. You stumble out of the elevator, tripping on your dress as you pull away from him, and he catches your hand, giving your knuckles a princely tap. He pushes you on another wall, hissing – because he dick points toward the ceiling and, every time he presses up against you, it bends to meet you, practically drawn to your pussy – hissing something about wanting you so bad, right now, just another reiteration. He doesn’t know what else to say. Most of the time, you just moan into each other’s mouths, just mash your lips together, trying to keep quiet, so his dirty talk skills are … lacking. He just hopes that he makes up for it with body language.

Jisung kisses and hisses all the way back to your room, both of you knocking into the furniture. “Sorry, I just need you right now,” he keeps saying, excusing the way he practically rams you against the closed door to your bedroom. He protected you from sharp corners and your head from the impact, but he just hurts his hand. Jisung inhales. His hands cup your face like flower petals, bringing you taller, even more on your tippy toes. You steady him by his shoulders, relaxing your jaw, accepting his tongue, and he kisses you chastely, thumbs rubbing into the apples of your cheeks.

And he’s the first one to pull away. Well, you can’t exactly open the door without making the both of you collapse, neither of you balanced correctly on your feet. You’d crash to the floor in an instant.

“I love you.”

Your lips twitch at the corners, curving up your smile wider than it already is. “I love you, too.”

Jisung remembers when he had a crush on you like three years ago. He doesn’t remember when his feelings started, but based on the way everyone teases him, you included sometimes (if you’re not kissing him appreciatively), he’s always had them, from the moment he laid eyes on you reading at the café . And this feels a lot like that – the-the fluttering in his empty stomach, the tingling and hyper-awareness of his limbs, the rush to say anything, just to see what makes you laugh or what makes you stay. He even doodles little hearts in your cheeks with his thumbpads.

“I –“ he swallows. “I –“

“Jisung?” you interrupt, breath shaking out your nose, “Can we have sex now?”

“God, yes.”

Jisung kisses you again, having regained some balance in the beat. He thrashes a hand behind you, fumbling for the door knob, and when he gets it open, he dips you back again, walking you inside the room, supporting you mostly by the ass, hanging you around his neck like jewellery; he should really buy you a new couple ring later. Honestly, he’s mostly surprised by his – and your – breath control and not his core strength (that is what the gym is for!), never getting winded between all the kisses or tongues or teeth. And you – God, you – keep leaning backward, hauling all his 180 centimeters toward the bed, making him more and more impressed by your commitment to zero space for Jesus. You suck his bottom lip inside your mouth, sealing your top lip inside his, and he whimpers, knees buckling again, so he lifts you up and pushes you on the bed, kicking away the stupid bench that slows him down.

“I’m gonna eat you out,” Jisung decides, towering over you.

“Ugh, no,” you whine, squirming the bed into another mess of sheets.

“No?”

“Jisung, I need you to please, please fuck me now, cock inside. We did all the foreplay already, and – and I’m ready, I promise. I want you so bad. You’re so sexy. I –“

He returns his lips to yours, this time softer, sweeter, slower, cutting you off, this time, before you ramble yourself into oblivion (before he has the chance to take you there himself). And you relax again, shoulders slumping into the mattress as he crawls over you, showering you with attention from lips to feet. Jisung builds up his momentum again while you gradually undress, starting with his blazer, pulling one arm out, then the other, redirecting your hands down to his waistband again, starting with the zipper. You creep your nails over the tip of his cock, and he thrusts upward, pushing your hand into a claw around the girth, fucking your hand a few times. His length is too big, you both know, so it bounces over your stomach, almost like a premonition for how deep he’ll go. Jisung tries to get more comfortable, but he slips on your silky dress, the skirt flailing out to the side. The way he falls moves you on your obliques, and he brushes your hair behind your ear, away from your neck. You throw your leg over his, tangling your limbs lackadaisically.

“I – my – it’s too big.”

“A huh,” you nod all the way through your chest, toppling him, straddling one of his thighs. “I know. It’s hot.” You don’t grind him (much to his disappointment), because he is still wearing his tux and your panties are just way too thin and wet at this point (he hopes), but if you ask, and maybe even if you didn’t, he would make this the designated sex suit and fuck you in it whenever he wears it, regardless of the function (actually, there’s a charity gala coming up, when he has to wear this ensemble again). But he wants the intimacy of closeness, of vulnerability, of nakedness this first time.

“No, I just,” Jisung whines, “I need to prep you before you can take it – t-take me.”

You inhale sharply, and he feels it. He trails his eyes up, wide, to meet you, staring at your face, noses touching. Jisung waits for your answer; he knows that you want this too, so he gives you both a moment to collect yourselves, mentally preparing himself, too, for the next step. And a beat passes. Then, he unzips your dress at the back; it’s not long, the zipper, so he doesn’t have to wait even more, but the drag slows time and you squeeze his biceps, encouraging him to go faster. He slides the entire material off you, stripping you down to just your panties. When he goes to do the same for himself, standing at edge of the bed, you kneel, still shorter than him, on the blankets, and do it for him. You start with the tie, slowly loosening it side-to-side. It pulls him forward, and he braces himself on your hips, fingers twisting in the waistband of your panties. You get shirt and under-shirt off quickly, but stop at his pants, the top button already undone and fly down.

“Is – is something wrong?”

“I really want to suck you off again,” you confess, jumping from his dick to his eyes.

Jisung pecks your lips. “You can do it later. We have all night.”

“Yeah, okay, yeah,” you nod, kissing him languidly, leaving him to take off his pants.

“Turn around,” he mumbles on your lips. And this time, you comply, standing on your hands and knees, all fours. Jisung copies you, kneeling eye level with your pretty, glistening lips. He grabs your ass first, in both hands, pulling your vulva apart, panty crotch to the side, two fingers each, middle digits dipping inside, just an interphalangeal crease deep. “Don’t cum yet.”

“Jisung, ple –“ You squeal, falling on your forearms, when he cautiously licks outside, around his fingers, up your slit, and you shudder an exhale. “What h-happened to prep-ping me?” you stutter and whine. “You’ll feel so good inside me, Jisung – ah.”

Jisung drags his thumb down the line of your makeshift thong, rubbing round your asshole tentatively before slipping two long and flexible fingers knuckle deep inside your cunt. His other hand pushes your cheek into the pillow, giving you a head rest, making you ass pop up. And slowly, he draws his fingers out, then pushes them back in three-quarters of the way. He does it again, pulling out, extracting your moan, and pushing in, all the way this time. Jisung sets that steady pace, slow and controlled, and he kisses your ass, leaving a bite mark. It makes you yelp, and you squeeze your pussy, accidentally pulling off. You grind back down, meeting his rough knuckles. And soon, he’s finger fucking you harder, with three fingers, and you’re bouncing on his hand, your panties hooked on his thumb.

“Ah, Jisung, fuck, Park Jisung, that feels so good.”

Blindly, he finds his cock and holds it by the base, squeezing his hand like a cock ring to keep from cumming without you.

“I think,” he pants, “I think I need to fuck you now.”

You nod, enthusiastically, turning on your back. “How do you –”

“Missionary,” Jisung answers too fast, already dragging you into position. “I want to see your pretty face.” He hovers his cock above your pussy, between your plushy thighs, hand around the top. The thrusts once, heavy tip dipping to your stomach, that bulging premonition hitting him all over again. His knuckles rasp, kneading your folds, rolling your clit in the wetness, and your knees fall in, so he has to spread them again. “What if it’s too big?” he wonders out loud, shifting his cock to your entrance.

“I can take it,” you promise, bobbing your head. “I can take it, plea –“

He cuts you off with a firm kiss, smashing his lips ungracefully on yours, and slips the first quarter inside you. The kiss is less to muffle you, since neither of you have to be so quiet right now, more to share this intimacy with you. He adds another inch, shallowly thrusting to get his dick wet.

“Ah, you’re so tight,” he hisses. “I could fuck you like this.”

He thought he prepped you enough, but halfway deep, his cock already hits an impasse, so he tries something that he saw in a porno. Jisung moves your right leg over your leg, giving him access to your ass, jiggling your boobs. The motion pulls his cock out a little, and he pushes it back in, pushes more in, making you both groan.

“Full, so full, Jisung.”

“Oh, God, I’m going to cum if you keep talking.”

You grind your hips down. “You should.”

“I’m not wearing a condom,” he reminds you, gritting his teeth. You pull your ass, showing off the way you take him so well, and he rips your panties, exerting his lack of self-control elsewhere. He throws the tiny material at the wall and falls on your lips, repeating, “I’m not wearing a condom, and I – I cum so much.”

“I know. It's hot, you're so -” you moan, fucking yourself on his dick, slapping his thighs, taking him completely. “F-fill me up, Jisung. I want all of you.”

“I want – I want you, too,” he stutters, brain struggling to multitask between answering you and fucking you.

So, he pushes his palms into the mattress, squelching the rest of his dick inside your pussy, basking in your moans. You boobs bounce circularly every time he bottoms out, and he doesn’t know where to look – your cunt sucks him in, contracting around him without reprieve; your nipples taunt him, showing him something to bite and lick and suck; your lips part perfectly for him to shove his tongue down your throat, expelling a series of staccato moans mixed in with his name. Jisung settles for your collarbone, burying himself in the scent of his cologne marking your skin from earlier. His lips bite the bone, groans getting louder and louder.

“God.” He clutches your knees, dragging you so close. “Is this – is this okay?” he asks, despite not letting up, going faster actually, driving you higher up the bed, making him climb even more on you, chasing you.

“Yes, yes, please don’t stop,” you cry. “I’m gonna cum, Jisung, I’m gonna cum.” And you choke on your words, babbling incoherently, talkin’ nonsense.

“Come on, baby, you can cum,” Jisung encourages you. He stands up straight, thrusting in, and in, and in, bottoming out. He holds his cock fully sheathed, deep, circling his hips over your labia, naked thigh sliding up and down your clit. You claw his arm, dropping into his hand, and he intertwines your fingers. You squeeze his hand, and your pussy clenches on his cock. Everything starts choking him, and he loses his breath, inhaling and inhaling, mouthing at your neck.

Then, you cum, back deflating into the bed, lulling pliantly in his hands, toes releasing the tension.

Jisung picks up his pace, brutalizing your cunt, and you whine and squirm, moaning. He feels the veins in his cock catch more prominently in your pussy, like you don’t want to let him go, so he just keeps pushing and pushing and pushing, your canal practically wringing him dry, and he cums too. Thick ropes control the way his cock jumps inside your uterus, bouncing on your spongey, little G-spot before more spills out, forcing him to remove himself. He planks above you, head hanging low, sweat matting down his hair.

You raise both your hands, brushing it back to see him better, and you prop yourself on your elbows, raising yourself high enough to kiss him, slowly but deeply.

Jisung sighs dreamily, flopping down next to you on his oblique. He tilts your chin up at him.

“You,” he starts, pecking you quickly, “are so perfect.”

“Then,” you giggle, taking his left hand. You run your thumb and index finger down his ring finger. “Will you marry me, Park Jisung?"

[jackiesnats]

A Problem

pairing: kidd g x reader

warnings/tags: fluff

summary: gabe wants a new desk for his new recording studio in your house.

prompt: “I’m not buying ikea furniture again.” | edited by my lovely girlfriend @specialinterestshows 🩵

You sighed, bringing in another box. You were excited to finally be living with Gabe, but you hadn’t realized how exhausting carrying his things inside would be.

“Baby, baby, let me help you! Go sit and take a break!” Gabe said, grabbing the box from you.

You hesitated at first, considering that you were already in the house with it. Gabe wasn’t having it, taking the box from you, he brought it into one of the two spare bedrooms. You had allowed him to have one to set up for his own recording studio. You loved seeing him work on stuff at home, using notebook after notebook to work on both albums and songs.

“I’m perfectly capable of helping you out, love,” you sighed, but he shook his head in disagreement. You raised an eyebrow, giving him a suspicious look. “Okay… what do you want?”

Gabe gave you a smile, “Nothing.”

Normally you would believe him and drop the subject, but the tone of his voice told you that he had something on his mind. You gave him a look, making it known that you didn’t believe him as you crossed your arms over your chest.

“Okay,” he sighed dramatically. “I want to get a new desk for my studio here.”

You nodded, “Babe, I don’t have a problem with that at all. Why wouldn’t you just say something?”

“It’s one that I really like that I saw at IKEA when Chase was visiting. He wanted to check some things out and that’s when I saw it.”

Your smile quickly turned into a frown.

“Absolutely not,” you shook your head. “No.”

Gabe laughed, rubbing your arm. “Just because you had a hard time building the last thing you bought from there, doesn’t mean I will. Plus, I don’t even think it’s there, I just want to go look.”

You rolled your eyes, “I’m not buying IKEA furniture again.”

“Baby,” he hummed, “I’ll buy it and put it together, okay? You don’t have to help me, I promise. And if I can’t put it together, I’ll let you tell me you told me so once.”

You gave him a smile, “Twice, and you have to let me bring in boxes with you because if it’s just you doing it we’ll be here for a few days and I don’t want you hurting yourself, okay?”

“Deal,” Gabe agreed.

You both grabbed boxes and after an hour of bringing things into your home, you were done for the day.

“I’d say we’ll be done with all of this in about… a full day. I didn’t realize how much shit we have,” you laughed, taking a sip of your water. You handed him the water bottle, smiling as he gladly took it with no hesitation. He took a few sips before handing it back to you.

“Would you like to come with me to IKEA?” he asked, trying his best not to smirk at you. He loved annoying you in fun ways and your hatred for Ikea was the perfect opportunity to do so.

“Gabe,” you sighed, knowing you were going to lose the battle. You loved him and you knew he needed a desk; as much as you hated IKEA, you knew you were going to help him anyway. “You know, even though I hate IKEA, I’ll help you as much as I can. I love you and I will set aside my IKEA grudge to help you.”

“I love you so much, you know that?” he said with a laugh.

“I love you so much,” you rolled your eyes.

The two of you brought in more boxes and after an hour, Gabe made a suggestion: “Let’s take a break, go to your favorite place to be at and then go out for some lunch? I’ll buy.”

You gave him a side eye, “Okay. Let me go to the bathroom and get some water before we leave.”

“You got it, let me change into clean clothes,” he said, making his way to your shared room.

You loved Gabe so much and no matter what, you always wanted to help him with everything.

[antisociallilbrat]

imagine the losers club facing off vecna

it could go two ways

either they're doomed because vecna's coming for the regret and fears they have (i have a feeling bill and richie is going to be vecna's favorite victims in the group)

OR

they're going to decimate him because they already fought pennywise, the eater of worlds, and won TWICE. (well, kind of.) and the losers club is going to be vecna's worst nightmare

yes this was inspired by your poll

- kori -

Kori I have been thinking about your question all day and I've never been so excited to answer something because I kept thinking, could they defeat Vecna? You probably weren't expecting this long of an answer but my brain went wild. Edit: my God this got so long I had to put a break in.

Before proceeding: Tw for mentioned s*icidal thoughts

Okay so first of all we have to establish how It antagonized the Losers and how they were able to defeat It (though there is speculation they didn't fully kill It but that's another story)

It used their fear against them while Vecna uses guilt. Fear and Guilt are two sides of the same coin and with the Losers there's many examples of this. Richie's fear of someone finding out his secret vs the guilt of being that way in the first place, Mike fearing what happened to his parent's vs the guilt of being the one to survive, Bill's fear over not finding Georgie/what happened to Georgie happening to other kids vs the guilt over not being there for Georgie when It got him. And to defeat It, conquering their fears, played a major part in allowing them to do so. And they all successfully did as adults, except for Stan. We're going to come back to him a minute though.

Anyways how It had to terrorize Bill as an adult is a little different. While the other Losers had yet to get pass their fear, as they would in the final battle, Bill was kinda already over his fear as an adult from the start, he knew Georgie was dead, and all that was left was his guilt. Which we see It use against him and adult Bill had to forgive himself in order to fight It.

Now on to Vecna. Vecna who uses his victim's guilt against them before killing them.

There was this very popular post that said something like: Richie Tozier could fight a demogorgon but Mike Wheeler could not fight Pennywise. So let's just say that the Loser's have fought and successfully killed a demogorgon in this universe. Vecna is no demogorgon so when he shows up it's a different story.

And while I agree with you that Vecna would torture Richie, I actually think he would go after Stan first. Stan who we know doesn't handle fear well. Stan would have had the same reaction if they had just killed a demogorgon and found out there was an eviler being coming for them. Like how he did when he learned that they may have to come back to Derry if It wasn't dead. In the book he makes as joke about cutting not just their hands, you know what I'm talking about, and while this is a joke we know there was truth to it for him. Because even as a child Stan feared having to go through that again that he would rather just end it. Now there is a theory that it was It that made Stan take his life and I do believe that to an extent but those thoughts were still Stan's own.

I know I've been talking about Stan's fear, but remember, guilt is the other side of the coin. Now we could reason that Stan would've felt guilty over wanting to just abandon his friends for them to fight for themselves. To 'take the easy way out' (I hate that term) Vecna would've eat that shit up and I hate thinking about how Vecna would've tortured Stan. I do fully believe that Stan would still die first if the Losers were fighting Vecna. He was the weakest link. (Stan bb I love you so much and you are brave but it's true.)

After Stan Vecna would target Richie, Eddie, or Bev. Not so much Bill because Bill's fear/guilt was over Georgie and asking if Georgie is dead in this universe is a whole nother thing.

The thing to consider to is that when fighting Vecna, the Losers didn't have years of research on how to defeat him. Also they don't have powers like El and possibly Will. (Season 5 I'm looking at you) Point is, there are different powers at play when the Party fights Vecna vs if the Losers were to.

But the Losers have Mike Hanlon who is so great. Mike who did the research on how to fight It. Mike would be the one to piece together about Henry Creel and he was probably the one who learned that fire was what was needed to kill a demogorgon in the first place. And based on what happened to Stan, I believe he would be the one to figure out the signs of Vecna's next victim. I don't know if he would figure out the music thing in time though but I would like to think he would. Mike Hanlon is a badass if you haven't noticed.

With Mike's research and Stan's death uniting them together (parallels to It) I think the Losers would have more of a chance.

But what defeated It was the Losers beating theirs fears (in Bill's case his guilt) and uniting together in love and friendship. The power of friendship ain't going to do shit against Vecna, I'm sorry.

So honestly to sum this all up, I simply don't know if they could defeat Vecna. They definitely would not be easy to take down, especially after Stan's death fueling them, but I don't know if they could beat him. There's also the fact we haven't seen how Vecna could be defeated.

Ya'll know I go feral for fandom discussion and if you read all of this, thank you. And a huge thank you to Kori for feeding my brainworms, do you regret it yet?

Now ask me if I think the Party could defeat It, I dare you.

[ladytauria]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by @zeroducks-2! thank you <3

How many works do you have on AO3?

90 total, with 8 of them for my original fiction pseud.

What’s your total A03 word count?

266,163. however, i like to subtract 2 of the original works i wrote, 'cause most of the writing is no longer canon to the project it was written for xD so, 198,925. still impressive!

What fandoms do you write for?

whatever fandom i'm obsessed with at the moment.

in the past, that's been super robot monkey team hyper force go!; how to train your dragon; ghost hunt; percy jackson & the olympians; legend of zelda; and ducktales (2017). there are a few other fandoms but those works never left my drafts xD

currently, it's DCU, & mostly bats at that <3

What are your top five fics by kudos?

in a diner at midnight (1,161 kudos) -> first story in my reverse robins series, as well as the first batfic i ever published lol. Tim catches Jason stealing the Batmobile's tires after he was sent back to the car, and does what any good Robin would: laugh his ass off and then buy him dinner.

you know just what i need (1,158 kudos) -> Tim is an omega. Jason is an alpha. Jason likes him, but he knows he blew his chances at being with Tim years ago. That changes, after he finds out that Tim has experienced a string of rejections, as he prefers to dominate alphas in bed. Jason is... entirely unopposed to this.

early confrontations (814) -> another part of the reverse robins series. When Jason finds out that Tim might be alive and operating as the Red Hood, he decides the best course of action is to break into his apartment.

inquiring minds (794) -> the only non-DC fic on this list. Ducktales (2017). Penumbra wants to know how Donald didn't burn up in Earth's atmosphere.

held together (792) -> another part of the reverse robins series. After Bruce accuses Jason of killing Garzonas, he goes to Tim for comfort.

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

There for a while I was only responding if someone had a question, but now I do try to respond more, even if just to say thank you, or send back a heart emoji in return xD

What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmmm. I don't write a lot of unhappy endings xD But "empty promises" is probably the angstiest ending I've written. Maybe "twenty to one."

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hmm…

Edit: I didn’t realize I forgot to finish answering this one!! Most of my fics end happily so I’m not sure which one has the happiest 🤔 I will have to look through and edit again with a proper answer lmao

Do you get hate on your fic?

Not in a while. Only once on AO3. Twice on FFN. Some people weren't very happy I wrote genderfluid Link :) And then prior to that-- I mean. It was hate, I guess, but it was more funny than anything else. Guest account was upset at the length of my oneshot collection entries and started advertising for a date, lmao. Ah, trolls.

Do you write smut?

Yes. Usually with feelings, and on occasion, with plot.

Do you write crossovers?

Hmm, I have had a conversation about crossing over my first fandom with DC, but idk if that will ever actually leave my drafts ^^;

That said, I do like the idea of writing fusions?

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No.

Have you ever co-written a fic?

Not in a very long time! And the two I was co-writing never did get finished, lol.

What‘s your all-time favourite ship?

I hop fandoms and multi-ship too much to have an "all-time" favorite ship. But currently I vibe hardest with JayTim.

What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Hmm...

So I tend to either plod along at WIPs until they're either finished or I've moved fandoms xD Every now and then I will scrap one, but for the most part, there's a pretty good chance of me finishing the fics I start.

That said...

I don't know exactly what the problem is, but I've been having a really difficult time working on the tenderest of touches. Stray!Tim x Hood!Jason teaming up to kill the Joker, and as they're waiting for their plans to come to fruition, they end up having lots of ill-advised kinky sex... which slowly causes their feelings for each other to deepen and reveal themselves.

There are also some identity shenanigans, as Jason never learned Tim's secret ID and Tim has no idea that Hood is his dead first crush :)

What’s your writing strengths?

I think I'm good at conveying emotion. I also think I do alright with dialogue :) And, hm, metaphors / imagery?

What’s your writing weaknesses?

Character voice. Not so much in dialogue, but in the prose? I tend to stick to 3rd Person Limited, and I feel like my personal writing voice tends to come out too strong & overwhelm the character's.

Endings. Sometimes I find the right one, but other times I meander for a while, or just. Decide to stop it at a certain point, which can be a little abrupt.

Juggling more than so many characters. This one hasn't shown up so much in DC fics because I don't think I've really written much with more than 3 characters, but that's about my limit. After that I end up forgetting people / certain characters end up kind of disappearing.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

A word here or two, yes. A couple of lines, maybe. But any more than that... not likely?

First fandom you wrote for?

Super Robot Monkey Team Hyper Force Go! An old Disney cartoon from the early 00s. It was... mecha-anime adjacent, centering around a human and his five cybernetic monkey teammates trying to stop their planet from being (destroyed? ruined? corrupted?) by the Skeleton King.

Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Hmm...

Okay, actually my favorite fic I've written hasn't been posted yet. I was persuaded to make it longer and--well. I had ideas, so. That's what I'm doing :)

But of the ones I have posted...

It's a toss-up. Because like... I have two that I genuinely enjoy re-reading because (at least for the moment xD) I have no complaints. And then there are two I'm just. Genuinely proud of the concept and the outcome, even if there are areas I might want to fix, I think I did a good job anyway.

And then there's one that I'm genuinely just proud of finishing bc of how much trouble I had with it xD

Anyway. Um.

I'm gonna go with the two i enjoy re-reading the most---

drape me in your warmth // patience is a virtue (rewarded by sin)

no pressure tagging... @paprikadotmp4 // @kieran-granola // @generatorcat // @disniq // @enak-s // @glaciya

[m1ckeys-3lite]

I have some yapping to do so bare with me.

(This was all written because of one edit I saw on TikTok of S5 EP12 where Mickey & Ian 'Break up')

He was in pure shock because he believed that Ian loved him back (Which Ian did he just didn't want to bother Mickey with his crazy shit anymore as he said there.) it just felt unreal 'cause this was the firts time he loved someone. Actual love not just bangin' and shit. Also his first time experiencing being loved since he grew up in an abusive household. It was very hard for him to accept his feelings towards Ian, as we see it takes him almost 3 years. I said almost because I'm fully convinced that Mickey knew what he felt towards Ian in S3, he just didn't let himself actualy accept it, because if he did Terry might have found out and killed Mickey, since he was very capable of and almost did twice in S10. Now, a slightly different topic. Mickey would do anything for Ian or the Gallaghers. It's an act of love from his side. For example, he wanted to kill Sammi because of what she did to Ian (I hate her so much for that.) It was also an act of revenge. But anyway I went off topic. In S4 EP11 Ian asks if they're a couple or not. Mickey says that ofcourse they are. But Ian is unhappy because he is tired of always hiding their relationship around others. It bothers Mickey, he wants to deal with it, but he couldn't deal with it then 'cause Yevgeny had the baptism or whatever you call it. Later that day, it's an after party or whatever at the Alibi where Svetlana threatens to tell Mickey's father about him and Ian. He insults her. He's scared of his father because he knows that he's capable of killing him. Ian is there (respect for Ian for even being brave enough to be in the same room as the person that beat the shit out of you and your 'boyfriend' back in the time.) Mickey tells Ian it's propably the best if he leaves, Ian doesn't want to leave. He wants to spend time with Mickey. He's still unhappy because Mickey's so afraid of his father (WHICH IS FUCKING REASONABLE!!!) He wants to be free, "Ian, what you and I have makes me free. Not what these assholes know." I see that as an I love you. Ian threatens to leave. Or more like 'break up' with Mickey. So basically Ian pushes him into coming out. He didn't believe Mickey would actualy do it so he grabbed his stuff and walked to the door. But then Mickey came out. AND THIS MOMENT LADIES AND GENTLEMAN MEANS.... That Mickey would do anything for Ian whenever, wherever. He would take a bullet for him (he basically did twice). Thick and thin, good times-bad times, sickness-health. All that shit.

Thanks for bearing with me 🙏🙏

[ourladyofmaplemurder]

ooh!! Cheryl of course for your unhinged character bingo please 🙏!

Explanation under the cut, as is custom. <3

Cheryl Blossom really checks all the boxes for me. Every single one.

Daddy issues. Mommy issues. Same, bro. I want her to be happy forever, but I will also torture her in fanfic because I love her and hate myself. (It's more love than self-loathing though, I promise. I just need her to fight my demons so we can both fucking heal.)

I'm putting her in a snowglobe and SHAKING IT. I am casting her in bronze and admiring her in my garden. I'm chewing on her leg.

She is the saddest, wettest cat in a cardboard box and I'M TAKING HER HOME to cherish her forever. I'm putting her in a blender and bloody is splattering everywhere.

I would take a COMET to the face for her.

When people talk shit about her (beyond reasonable criticism or outside of a funny joke) I genuinely see red. Ba dum tsssss. But also, Cheryl-haters should steer clear. I have violence in my heart about this woman.

You already KNOW I'm working on a dissertation about her to be completed later this year. It could easily be 10 hours, but I'm editing it down because I am applying for sainthood and it's my first miracle. <3

All joking aside (not really), Cheryl Blossom is one of a kind to me. She captures everything I love and hate about myself. I see so much of myself in her that I can't help but love her and I can't help but roll my eyes and laugh at her.

She's the clown in me. The woman-fucker. The firestarter. The bitch. The broken bird. The ice dancer with a plan. The witch no one believes. The madwoman and the saint. We're the mothers we never had and the fathers we flinch away from. We're unrelenting and utterly doomed. We're obsessed with ourselves in way that's deeply exhausting but utterly inevitable considering "she's just like that" and "no one listens to her". We're processing through art. We also both mellowed out over the years after a period of self-imposed isolation. We're both so tender with those we love. Neither of us know how to show it very well sometimes. We're both WAY too much.

The biggest difference is that she's high femme and I am the dyke version of Skrillex (Not intentional, but it's been said several times now). She uses fashion as her shield. I use piercings. I am both envious of her femme aesthetic and hopelessly attracted to it.

The other big difference is that she is moneyed and I grew up with nothing. Amazing how similar we are considering that. Childhood trauma really IS that powerful.

When I was in my early 20's, I suffered a drug-induced psychotic break where I genuinely believed I was a prophet sent from God to save the world. (I recovered and have since learned that maybe my proclivity for madness, drama, and drugs should no longer mix.) But god damn it, I understood exactly when she suggested that even though she probably wasn't a living saint, wouldn't that be miraculous?

When I was a kid, my "proverbial" twin died suddenly and I have carried the weight of his death ever since. We live two lives. Our own and the expected one of the dead other. Twice the pressure and, shockingly, twice the disappointment, but never twice the love. (Not a literal twin, but one of a pair.)

If she were real, we would fuck each other to death and leave nothing but a pile of ash.

[ocean-blueeyes]

Day 2: What's the earliest thing you can remember about your TC?

When I was in year 7, I remember him often walking in and out of my English class to talk to my English teacher. But my first proper interaction with him was when our teacher wasn't in so he watched our class from the hallway until a teacher came. I was at the back of the class, by the door, and he saw me reading and asked what I was reading. I was reading The Hate U Give and this was back when the movie had just come out so he asked if I had watched the film. I said no but he told me it was a really good film and recommended I should watch it. This happened years ago, we didn't even know each other's names and I didn't have a crush on him.

Day 3: Do you like your TC's subject? Do you think you're good at it?

He teaches English and English has always been my favourite subject. I do believe I am quite good at his subject. I've always gotten As (and one B) since he's taught me and two times he used my work as an example.

Day 4: How do you feel about your age gap?

There's a 15/16 year age gap between us and I know it's not good. If there was a chance between us, which I highly doubt, I think eventually I wouldn't enjoy being with a guy so much older than me a couple of years down the line.

Day 5: Have you ever said anything to your TC that showed you favoured them? Have they said anything like that to you?

My school does these termly things were students are allowed to send notes of appreciation to their teachers. I sent him note twice, but left them anonymous. However, I have a very distinct handwriting so he probably knew it was me. Before that, he sent me a letter home. He had chosen me as the English's department "Star of the term".

Day 6: Have you ever noticed any small habits they have?

Yes, he always bends his knees when talking to most students. Probably because he's quite tall so he's trying to get on our level, but I think it's quite cute.

Another habit he has is whenever he has a spare moment at the start of the lesson, he likes to put these little drawings on the whiteboard that relate to the lesson, even though he's no good.

Day 7: What gift would you like to give them?

I would love to find out some books he loves and maybe get him some special editions of them. He always does his marking in a green fountain pen so maybe I'd get him a set of fountain pens in all colours.

Day 8: Does your TC ever talk about what it was like when they were a student?

Occasionally. Everyone knows that he went to this really famous private school in the UK. He tells us about some of the strict rules and what his classmates were like.

Day 9: Does your TC have a significant other? If so what do you know about them and how do you feel about them?

He has a fiancée and literally no-one was expecting this so when he casually announced this, the whole class was shocked. My friends and I were doing some stalking and we thought we found his fiancée, but findings from other students say we're wrong. I don't know the woman so I can't form an opinion. All I know is that she's super lucky 😭

Day 10: What is the longest time you've gone without seeing them?

The Summer holidays - 6 weeks. I coped surprisingly well.

Day 11: What do other people usually think of them?

It's an objective truth in our school that he's one of the most attractive teachers in our school. However, a lot of people don't like his teaching methods and he doesn't get a long with a lot of the students in the younger years, so they can find him quite "jarring".

Day 12: Do you often make excuses to speak to them? What kind of excuses do you use?

No, I'm too shy. Maybe once in a while, I'll aks for something I could easily have handled myself or I'll get to class a little early to make general small talk. I do however make plenty of excuses to see him. Maybe taking a longer route to a certain class or hanging out in a specific place during break. My art classroom is close to his classroom, so I always leave my sketchbook in my art class and collect it at the end of the day in hopes of seeing him again.

Day 13: Other than the subject they teach, what are they really passionate about?

From what I can tell, he speaks French. He goes to France for holiday often. He follows a lot of French accounts on his socials, studied it at A-level and will often greet us in French. Whenever trying to teach us the etymology of words, he'll often draw from French words with similar meanings. That's ironic however because everyone in our class studies spanish, but I do speak a little bit of Frnech so I'm often the only one to understand what he's on about.

Day 14: What is a skill you really wished your TC had?

GOOD HANDWRITING.

The onky good thing about his terrible handwriting is that he's very self-aware so he'll come to you to read out his comments and explain.

Day 15: Which MBTI personality type do you think they have? (If you don't know MBTI, which Howarts house do you think they'd be placed in?)

I don't know the ins and outs of MBTI, but I think he'd be an introvert as appose to an extrovert. I think he would be a hufflepuff.

Day 16: