#edgar allen poe songs

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2023: #18

18. AUSTRIA Teya & Salena - "Who the hell is Edgar?" 15th place

Decade ranking: 51/116 [Above Ronela, below Jeangu]

OOOOOH MIO PADRE, I'VE GOTTA ROAST ME SOME BARBIES, ooooooooooh no.

It does NOT pay to be funny, sadly. Yeah, I wish I didn't have to go there, but sometimes the stars just don't align. With Loreen and Pasha being reunited and the year generally being mediocre, Liverpool 2023 already had enough parallels with Baku 2012. The "preshow obsession has a disappointing live" part I could have done without.

Like seriously. Was there ever a more slam-dunk end of contest favourite for me than TeyaLena? (well other than You Know Who, but we'll get there). My recent faves were Think About Things, Shum and In Corpore Sano. All uptempo, all enjoyable, all secretly very clever entries, eating and mothering (or in Da­ði's case brothering) as THE act on everyone's lips as the dust settled. Edgar was one of two entries who could have been The One for this year!!! But as Poe Poe Poe became Poo Poo Poo I'm forced to pack up my praise pen and bring out my critical analysis quill :-/

Fortunately, like the ladies, I am such a good writer, so enjoy this lengthy review, which is more like a vivisection:

ON THE FLAWS OF 'WHO THE HELL IS EDGAR?'

The first instinct would be to say that the song was impossible to bring, but I don't buy into that logic. "Edgar" was great, a vision, and absolute fucking BANGER. That's the hill, I'll die on. Despite the flaws of its live, I will always cherish it as a song.

Granted, the song was a lot of things at once. That's what made it both iconic and live liability. You try to explain to a layman casual audience member what Edgar is about. How it satirizes the music industry. How self-deprecating it is. What an API is. What an A&R is. What the 0.003 stands for. Now do that in the THIRTY SECONDS TIME FRAME it takes for the video teaser to play. You can't. You can be the best commentator or the most eloquent eurovision-obsessed guncle. Also, you're making me think with your words. Thinking bad. ME WANT ENJOY SHOW. ME WANT GOOD TIME, NO THINK.

So, there's two approaches you can take here, if you play to win.

The first by embracing the campness and going full ham, which how the televote countries would handle it. Your Moldovas, Ukraines, Finlands, Serbias, Norways. Hand Edgar over to one of them, and TeyaLena would start bent over a laptop or typewriter, harrassed by ravens or men in Edgar Allen Poe costumes, who would so a possessed zombie dance while TeyaLena try to escape the clutches.

Naturally, such an act requires less effort from the performers and could be seen as an easy cop-out by juries (die, juries!) and result in a loss of points and well, Austria don't play that way. Austria don't have a built in televote base and feel they are better off playing for the same juries that would normally reject an Edgar.

So instead they went for option two: embrace the hyperpop and try to build momentum off its hyperactivity. Fair enough, that's less interesting and safe, but a valid choice that can result in a very good time.

On this occasion though, it was a MISTAKE.

The best part about Edgar was the combination of dumb hyperpop memes with clever satire, and the staging ignored the latter completely. It showed Edgar Allan Poe TWICE, and then spliced in the Spotify reference in the background without context. That was all the act did with the satire. They should have named this song "Where the hell is Edgar?". The vague references only work when the entire audience is already in on the joke, otherwise it's a three mins of braincell murder. If a pleb tuned in blind (over 75% of the audience), tough luck on them for trying to make sense of it all. SHOULD HAVE FOLLOWED ESC ON TIKTOK!!!.

Bottom line: THE STAGING WAS PEDANTIC.

Thematic acts can alleviate that problem. Think Konstrakta's spa tableau vivant, Katryna's tron aureole, the presence of Gagnamagnið on the stage alongside Daði Freyr. This year we had Vesna's hexaplet choreography, Käärijä's ballroom dancers, Loreen's panini press, Gustaph's motivational graphics, even Alika's fucking self-playing piano applies to this principle. All of these did well, the competent ones with juries, the camp ones with the tv. Intuitive but thematically fitting visual cues that instinctively get the vibe across without requiring the audience to ponder it too deeply (or become a parody, I SEE YOU, France.) that's what effecive staging is about. Now compare the above good stagings to what Austria came up with: Four dancers in Samanta Tina garb, some more created by the LEDs in the background, and a VERY basic choreography. This is not a just simplification but a dumbing down. Every visual cue comes across as nonsensical, because nothing quite ties it together with the music. If only the song itself had provided us with a clear visual reference point, huh?

Of course, a dumbed down staging concept could still yield a good result despite itself if the live was teeming with energy and bounced off in every direction to match the music. Folks would be voting based on pure performance skill and nothing else. After all, Ewnicorn bluffed its way into third on that very principle. Sadly, neither Teya nor Salena were versed in the art of singing and dancing at the same time.

So ultimately, you're given this awkward performance where Teya acted really well and produced delectable facial expressions - I mean who doesn't love THIS:

-but failed to harmonize with Salena, while Salena hit most of her notes but clearly struggled with the Dietmann's simplistic, toddler-like choreography, like a Leila Jane or Mirud on stilts. Nice that they complimented each others weaknesses by showcasing opposite talents, but if you wanna do well just get yourself a girl who can do both.

And there we have it, Teya and Salena. High Risk, High Reward usually plays out for the better, but this is one such occasion where the high risk was avoided and the just reward was a disappointing score on the middle of the scoreboard. Such is the price of not embracing your queer-coded campness in Eurovision. We have landed in mild-like hell, just like Nina Zilli and Jonsi and all the others that I wish I could love more, but sadly did not live up to their initial hype. That too is life. Onward to better things, and things will surely get good as we move forward, right?

THE RANKING

[sirhyst]

Singing voice claims for Edgar Allan Poe (BSD)

Note: these are just my silly opinions and not canon.

Don’t you Dare (make me fall in love you) by Kaden Mackay

Passing through by Kaden Mackay

Another Believer by Rufus Wainwright

This song was actually the first singing headcannon i assigned to Poe.

Out there from Hunchback of Notre Dame

- (I’m still unsure about this one but)

When we’re human from Princess and the Frog

specifically at the 0:47 second mark when Naveen starts singing, don’t ask me why I think Poe’s voice sounds like this i don’t know what the thought process is either)

Gummibears cartoon theme song

I’ve linked an old post of mine with the direct link to the song

[devotedlystrangewizard]

austria instantly captivated me. what is happening. i support this

[kindlythevoid]

Edgar Allen Poe // Pinterest // When the Mind Sleeps by Mariusz Lewandowski // Dark Matter by Robert Hunter Jones // Trillium by Louise Gluck // Carina Nebula (C92) pic from NASA // Promptuarium // Introduction to Quantum Theory by Franny Choi // Miracle of Creation by Mariusz Lewandowski // Rainer Maria Rilke, from Where Silence Reigns: Selected Prose; "An Experience," // Pinterest // Carl Sagan, Symphony of Science // Nebula Sharpless 2-106 pic from NASA // Twitter User @tsaritsasimp06 // chasingdaises // The Old Astronomer to His Pupil by Sarah Williams // Pinterest // Pinterest // Galaxy Hercules A pic from NASA // Imaginary Heroes (2004) dir. Dan Harris // Spacetime Fairytale by Regina Spektor // 30 Doradus Nebula pic from NASA // Stormy End by Sunrise Avenue // Dumbbell Nebula (M27) pic from NASA

This one was titled: Finding Comfort in the Enormity of the Universe When Your Problems Feel Too Big.

Yeah, I was *thisclose* to an existential crisis (aren't we all at some point?) and was learning about the stars, and isn't there something comforting about there being this wide expanse out there? All that beauty and chaos and light and dark and it's billions and millions of light years away, so far that you measure it in light, and you can't even use yourself as a metric when measuring up against nebulae and supergiants and blackholes. And it makes you feel kinda small, and maybe a little scared, but suddenly those problems aren't so big, are they? We're just little people on a little rock next to a little star with our own little moon. We really won the lottery on chances, didn't we? And doesn't that make you want to look at the stars, take a breath, and make it to the next day?

Side note: I spent a good couple of hours scrolling through NASA's website and getting sidetracked (hence my earlier post on the moon landing in two years). Lowkey in love with NASA's website, ngl. So as an added treat, here are a few of my favorites that I came across!!

This will tell you when/where you can see the ISS! (idk if it works internationally, I just sort of focusing on where I was atm, ha ha!)

This lets you know about upcoming launches! (how I found out about Artemis!!)

This is a map that lets you see pictures of a bunch of cool stars/galaxies/exoplanets/nebulae! (This is where I grabbed all of the pretty space pictures!! There's so much more, too!!!)

This is a website that posts a fun picture of certain tech or something in the universe as well as an explanation below every day!! (I was shown this recently and I keeeeep checking.)

And, last but not least, this website tells you what picture the Hubble Telescope took on your birthday!! (Astrology signs are OUT, tell me what picture was taken the day of your birth!!)

There's also a (fictional) comic strip about the first woman on the moon! (I didn't get a chance to read it, but it's also found on a whole page dedicated to interactives and games which is absolutely where I found some of those other links)

Anyway, there's definitely more to find and would highly recommend just scrolling through their website to see what you can find!

We're gonna be okay, y'all. (っ´⌣`)ﾉ(´._.`)

[casismycherrypiebaby]

EDGAR ALLAN POE IS IN THE FINAL PEOPLE

[adrielrook]

PLS someone make an edit of Edgar Allan Poe from Bungo Stray Dogs with the song “Who the hell is Edgar” from the Eurovision song contest I beg of you they served it on a silver plate for us aaaaa and it’s such a banger!

[safiresyrup]

today I am mourning for what's yet to come, deep in the afterparty of death

Black, tarred, the walls eat everything up

grim appetite for the full dark night

-s's.

[cursed-and-haunted]

🎧

For The Departed - Shayfer James

My favorite lyrics:

Now I must finish what I started, oh-oh/ I'll write a symphony for the departed/ And I have no time for second chances/ So I survive on bourbon, blood, and backward glances, oh

[meilia-stims]

Israfel from Nevermore, The Imaginary Life And Mysterious Death Of Edgar Allen Poe stimboard

🪶 🌟 🪶

🌟 🪶 🌟

🪶 🌟 🪶

[elspethdixon]

France, Germany, and Croatia were all robbed.

[moonmeg]

"Who The Hell Is Edgar" by Teya & Salena (Austria's ESC entry) has been playing in my brain on repeat and as much as I love the song, I'm slowly going insane

[jimmythejiver]

Warner Brothers should've let Michael Jackson split the difference and collaborated with Danny Elfman on Charlie and Chocolate Factory like they let Prince for Batman because MJ is all about that childhood is twee spooky goth shit.

[sirhyst]

I offer you another post about Poes voice 🤲

I’ve seen two edits using “Another Believer” by rufus wainwright and-

It doesn’t sound exactly like Edgar’s English dub voice but if he were to sing I feel like he would sound like this. I love the originals singers voice in this song, and the sorta “dragged out/singing through his teeth” in each word makes me really happy for some reason so I’m giving it to Poe

(Photos from Pinterest; nats (left) and blakeney (right))

[between-the-alchemist-and-god]

I recently bought a collection of Edgar Allen Poe works (I recognize it's a bit of a crime I didn't seek one out before) and istg this man writes one theme and one theme only and I'm living for it

[malcolmreeds]

austria, croatia or finland to win!!!! 

[hesperleveret]

Haven’t watched Eurovision for years but thought I’d better watch tonight since it’s happening in my city.

Last time I watched it I thought there were too many bland ballads.

Tonight, we’re straight outta the gate with a song about being possessed by Edgar Allan Poe.