#easily top 5 fics I've ever written
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saying we're just friends, thinking you're my man
word count: 11.3k
warnings: non-explicit smut, heavy making out
summary: Distance gives the soul time to think, and Tim thinks he's in love with you.
It's a textbook relationship.
Tim can't count the number of times he's read a fic like this.
In fact, he can already imagine the tags on your love story. Strangers to lovers, Friends to Lovers, Fateful Encounter, Alternate Universe - College, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn... the list goes on. You'd probably have a field day trying to finish the story inspired by the one the two of you experienced. Though, as he brushes his fingers through your hair in the kisses of the morning sun, he wouldn't have it any other way — even if he couldn't form a coherent thought when you were awake and talking to him. God, you make him weak.
In the blaring heat of August at orientation, you landed right at his feet after getting shoved around in the crowd of students.
"You good?" He holds his hand for you, and you take it, pulling yourself up.
"Sorry! They're quite a crowd." You laugh awkwardly. "I'm, uh—" Your name tumbled past your lips, an apologetic smile on your face, explaining to him that you were trying to get to the English building through the crowd of students. Tim told you his name (only first in fear you'd recognize his last) and showed you a shortcut to the building. You had taken the messily scribbled image, airdropped it onto your phone, and you had rushed off with a thank you yelled into the air. Tim hadn't thought much about you. It wasn't as if you'd be in the same department as him. He also had minimal GE classes, so—
Two days later, you sit next to him in his only GE class. He was required to take English regardless of his previous experience with it. His AP classes hadn't been kind enough to remove the requirement. Not even the fives on both of his English APs could have helped him avoid the expository hell all freshmen were required to take. So, he meets eyes with you as you apologize for sitting next to him, confessing that he was the only face you knew.
"So? What's your major?" You blink at him curiously as the class waits for the professor.
"I'm in Cybersecurity."
"Woah." You mumble. "Stem..."
"You?"
"Creative Writing." You grin. "Well, build your own major. But Creative Writing nonetheless."
"A writer?"
"Yeah."
Tim had watched as you played Minecraft the entirety of class, only skimming through the syllabus for his late work, absence, and attendance policies. He's not sure if you even caught the way the professor mentioned there was a syllabus quiz next class. Though it wasn't his job to tell you, but he still felt kind of bad if you were to fail it. He passes you a note, and you pause your game, glancing at the note. You grin at him, opening your phone and showing him your reminder. You go back to your Minecraft world for the rest of class, information going in one ear and out the other. (Tim found out later that you actually listen, and gaming was only a focus tactic you used.)
At the end of class, you save your world, push your chair in, and sprint for the door.
Tim shared no other classes with you. In fact, the two of you only had one class together for all four years of your college lives. Yet, there was something about you that had stuck with him. He didn't know what it was, but he hadn't felt that giddy over someone since his last relationship, his heart racing in his chest, his head spinning. He pushed everything down in favor of being able to pay attention in class. Though his coding skills were spectacular, his writing skills were less than stellar. He didn't understand how writing just came to you.
Especially not when you fell asleep halfway through your first monthly timed essay and still scored a 97. He could learn a thing or two from you, maybe. Were you doing memory consolidation in the middle of the exam? He has no idea how you did it.
Your name slips past his lips as you pack up after one class.
"Yeah?" You tilt your head at him.
"Are you," he pauses, (a little embarrassed. Tim Drake, son of Bruce Wayne, CEO of WE, was in need of help. Of course he was a little embarrassed.) "down to tutor me? My grade in this class is less than... acceptable." He grimaces at how his voice goes quiet.
You smile. "Yeah. I'm down. I'll give you my number and schedule and we can arrange a time. Expository writing isn't that bad. It's just the same sentence structure with some BS and then you're done."
"Easy for you to say," He hands you his phone.
"No. It's just like how you have structure when you code." You click your number in, texting yourself and saving his contact before you forget. "There is structure in everything you do."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." You beam at him.
Tim's next essay comes back with an 81. It's a big improvement from the 64 he scored the first time. You were right, the essays being the same thing over and over again. The structure is as easy as basic coding is to him. He understands you now.
He thanks you by taking you to the diner, paying for your meal.
You kick your legs at the booth, milkshake straw between your lips, lost in thought.
"Penny for your thoughts?" He raises a brow.
"Tim... what's your last name?" You frown. "It's fine if you don't tell me, but my friends have been asking who I've been tutoring and I realized I have no idea what your last name is."
"It's Drake." He scans your face for something when he tells you.
"Drake..." You pause, letting go of the milkshake straw. "huh. Like the CEO." You go back to your milkshake after the revelation.
"Not surprised?"
"I mean," You grimace at him. "You wear the down-low designer brands your adoptive father does, so not really. I had my suspicions, but I didn't want to pry in case you didn't want to tell."
"Down-low designer brands?"
"Bruce Wayne has a specific way of dressing casual." You bite on your straw. "I know this sounds creepy but I've done more research on brands billionaires wear than I'd like to admit."
"Does it have to do with your writing?" Tim thanks the waiter as his order is brought.
"Yeah." You smile sheepishly. "Is that creepy? Sorry."
"No. I've been expecting the unexpected from you for a while now."
You laugh. "Yeah?"
"I have an older brother who writes in his free time and the amount of things he's done for research is crazy."
"Right? Reddit and Quora are my saviors." You mumble. "I obviously can't kill for research, so the internet is my best friend."
"Do you search on incognito?"
"No. I prefer being able to dig up my weird research from my search history." You shrug. "I bet the FBI has me on a watchlist."
"I could check if you'd like."
You feign a look of shock. "Really?"
He smiles at you, and the two of you burst into laughter.
"You going to Connor's Halloween party next week?" You finish the last of your milkshake.
"Of course not." He deadpans. "Must I remind you I hate going out?"
"Awh," You pout. "I wanted someone to match maid dresses with."
"Excuse me?"
"For research."
The smile on your face suggests anything but.
"You can consider it as payment for all the times I'm going to tutor you."
"I've been paying you."
"No." You shake your head. "You pay me each time we have a session. I'm letting you pay me for the rest of the lessons by showing up to the Halloween party in a maid dress with me."
Tim looks at you incredulously.
"Actually, I'll even draft a contract if you don't believe me." You smile.
"And if I turn you down?"
"I'll find one of my friends to do it with."
"Then why ask me?"
"The thrill of the unknown? The endless answers you could have chosen? A grasp on your character better? It could be anything." You smile sweetly at him. "It's fine. You can continue paying me like you normally do."
"Who would you match with if not me?"
"Well, I was thinking Sam or someone else," You shrug. "but Sam doesn't celebrate Halloween. I'd match with the other guy friend, but one of my friends is into him so I don't want to make it seem like I'm making a move on someone I know she likes."
"So you asked me?"
"I don't know, Tim." You shrug. "You tell me. I thought you were a genius."
He leans in to read your face better. "I'd say you asked me because you're interested in me."
"Bingo." You grin wider this time.
"It's been less than two months."
"And? Hasn't stopped people from already hooking up." You shrug. "You can say no."
"See, I'd say yes, but Connor would take a photo and it would end up in our groupchat's blackmail folder." Tim slides his fries to the middle when he catches you staring. "You can have one."
"I thought you were a master hacker?" You pick a fry from the carton.
"Yeah, but friend code."
"Ah." You nod slowly. "It's okay to say no. I won't get offended."
"Maybe next year." Tim shakes his head.
"No worries!"
Tim stalks your Instagram on the day of Halloween, staring at the post where you're matching maid dresses with your entire friend group. In the back of his mind, he wonders, for a brief moment, if it would have just been you and him if he had agreed. The thought disappears just as fast, sighing as he puts his phone down and domino mask on. He had patrol. He could think about his mess of emotions later. Gotham needs him.
Your breath hitches from the spiked punch, your friends long lost in the crowd, your head spinning as you stumble onto the balcony of the apartment, resting your head on the cool of the metal railing, trying to calm the thumping of your head. You hear something rustle in front of you, the sound of someone swinging, and you open an eye to get a look. Your breath catches in your throat at the sight of Red Robin.
"Hey—"
"Dude... your costume looks way too realistic." You press your fingers to his armor, pulling him onto the balcony with you, mumbling under your breath as you feel him up through his costume. The smell of alcohol is apparent on your lips, the smell of your perfume flooding his senses — your cheeks are flushed beyond repair, and Tim finds himself frozen in place as you practically straddle him, fingers running to his face. His eyes dart to your cleavage unconsciously, staring back up to meet your eyes when he sees too much. You look sinful like this. His breath catches in his throat as he tries to loosen your grip on him without accidentally throwing you off, and he finally presses a hand of his to your stomach, successfully getting you to stop.
"Sorry." You mumble.
"No worries." He rasps, pushing you back onto your seat gently — heart drumming in his head.
"Ey, Red Robin!" Connor calls from inside the house. "You made it!"
"I'm not here to party. I was checking in on you to see if you were being responsible." He sighs.
You blink at him, doe-eyed, fascinated, drunken stupor all over your face.
"You're real?"
"Yes." He mumbles.
"Sorry for touching you."
"You're forgiven."
You lean back into your seat with an exhale, pulling out your phone as Connor leads Tim further into the party. He speaks to Oracle to let her know where he was, and he exhales when she tells him B says it's fine. He nods at the people who compliment his costume as he passes them, and he grabs himself a cup of punch, pausing when the alcohol stings his tongue. He dumps it in Connor's sink, eyes trailing to where you were sitting, breath catching in his throat at the sight of some sleaze slinging his arm around you. He rushes over to you, fingers smoothing down your neck to your shoulders, warning smile on his face.
"She has company for the night."
The man scrambles as you look up at him, beaming. His breath catches in his throat.
"Careful. I might just take you home."
"Don't you dorm?" He raises a brow in amusement.
"No one said my home." You turn around to reach for his jaw, fingers trailing down, breath fanning his. Tim would let you do this. He really would. He'd kiss you senseless on the balcony at Connor's house, yet he knows better than to do so. You're drunk from the punch. He'd be taking advantage of you no matter how much you want this when sober. So, he runs his thumb over your bottom lip, forehead meeting yours, every ounce of his willpower pulled into not just kissing you senseless here. If only you were sober. The things he would do.
"Where is she — babes! Time to go!" Your friend breaks the tension for him, pulling you away from him with a nod, alcohol riding off of her as well. He wonders if your driver is tipsy.
"I wanna go home with Red Robin..." You mumble, and your friend smacks you playfully. He notices one of you is sober, and he supposes that's enough. He heads back inside to find Connor.
Tim notices you miss class the next day. You text him to ask him to record the lecture for you, telling him the Halloween party was lit and you remember almost making out with a guy but your friend cockblocked you. Tim holds back a laugh in class, letting you know he'd email you his notes with the lecture recording. You thank him with an image, going offline immediately after. He clicks on his laptop, noting down whatever you might need. The recording would cover the rest. He sends everything at the end of class, your response instant. It wouldn't matter if you were absent from class. Your grade could take a hit.
He answers his phone when you dial him.
"Hey?"
"Timmers, you got Tylenol?"
"I can buy you some?" He offers. "I don't have class after this."
"Please? Oh, and throw in that one specific brand of bottled tea. I'll send you a photo." You grumble.
"Are you feeling better?"
"Like a dead girl walking."
"Taking that as a no. Want anything else?"
"I'll Venmo you the money. Bring me the receipt."
"You're sick. You can pay me back by actually being in class next lecture."
"Not hard. My head just hurts from the hangover."
"I'm guessing you got home safe?" Tim steps into the convenience store.
"Yeah. Our driver was sober. Thankfully."
Tim grabs the Tylenol and pauses. "I need the tea."
"Which convenience store are you in?"
"Metro."
"Aisle three by the American soda. It's green with white writing. You can read Chinese, right? It's Japanese but it says tea in Chinese."
"How'd you know?" Tim pauses. "Unsweetened green tea? The Japanese one?"
"Yeah. It helps a lot." You sniff. "Found out on google because someone made a compilation of you speaking foreign languages."
"So you assumed?"
"The part where you speak Cantonese, you were reading from a menu."
"Are you stalking me?"
"I'd prefer doing research."
"Stalking."
"Whatever helps you sleep at night."
Tim checks out, tapping his phone to pay. He takes the bag and pauses at the sight of the instant noodles. "You sure you don't want anything else?"
"Nothing. Feel free to get what you need too."
Tim hears you drink something.
"I'll text you my dorm building and number. There's no pin to get in just let them know you're here to see me. I'm pretty close with the RA."
"Networking already, huh?"
"Whatever you want to call it."
You text him your dorm building and number, and he knocks on your door.
You open it with a weak push of your arm.
"Are you actually sick?"
"No." You thank him as he hands you the plastic bag. You pop two pills out, swallowing them with the tea. "I'm extremely hungover. I drank too much punch."
"And you didn't realize?"
"No. I was trying to drink my thoughts away." You sniff. "So? How'd you spend yesterday?"
"Handing out candy at the manor with Bruce." Which was a lie. He spent Halloween using every last drop of self-control to not kiss your drunk self senseless at Connor's place. He can still smell your perfume.
"Sounds boring."
"I do it every year." He shrugs. Also a lie. He spends every Halloween patrolling Gotham because it's the one night of the year where every single criminal decides it's alright to go apeshit.
"mm," You yawn. "I matched maid dresses with my friend group. I posted about it. Do you have insta?"
"No. I keep a low profile."
"So you don't have a private account?" You raise a brow.
"I do, but what makes you think we're close enough for it?" Tim mirrors your raise of brow.
You hold your hand to your mouth, pretending to be offended. "We're not close enough for it?"
"I'm kidding." He mumbles. "What's your handle? I'll follow you."
"You better not turn down my request." You reach for the green tea again, drinking it as you show him your account. He already knows your account. He figured he'd have to ask or else he'd be a hypocrite for calling you his stalker. Well, he's already a hypocrite.
"Ough!" You sit up straighter, reaching for your laptop. "Connor sent me these photos that the photographer caught of me and Red Robin" You swoon.
"You're into him?"
You blink at him. "Did I not tell you I run his stan account?"
"You do wHAT." He freezes. "Are you the girl who gets caught up on the news every other week because you accidentally fall while taking photos of him?"
"Yep." You grin. "He's my favorite Robin."
Tim was extremely conflicted at the discovery. In retrospect, he should have known from the way you seemed to climb all over him and pull him onto the balcony without second thought, but he's still embarrassed at the idea that you had fawned all over him. Yet he shakes his thoughts away as he peers over your shoulder to stare at the photos caught of the two of you — well, of you. You didn't know he was Red Robin.
There's a photo of you straddling him, feeling him up, and Tim's neck snaps to the side.
"Tim? You good? You don't need to look if you're uncomfortable, you know?" You remind.
"No," He swallows. "I wasn't expecting photos like this."
"Isn't the photographer good? I'd pay this guy to take photos of me at parties any day."
"Yeah?" Tim raises a brow as you show him the other two. One of him with his fingers on your collar, the other of his forehead pressed to yours, thumb between the two of you's lips. You explain to him in excitement that you would have kissed him had your friend not pulled you away because you needed to leave. Tim rests his back on your closet, nodding along slowly. He had homework to do. Yet he spent the rest of the afternoon in your room listening to you ramble about Red Robin, conspiracies reminding him of someone.
"So let me get this straight." Tim interrupts. "I'm on a time crunch. I have something for one of my compsci classes due soon and wanted to get the big picture."
"Oh. I'm sorry for—"
"Don't." He holds his hand out. "I stayed. You run the biggest Red Robin stan account on Twitter and you're planning on posting those photos like he's some kpop idol?"
"Yeah?" You tilt your head.
"Are the fans not going to get mad that he's making out with someone at a party?"
"No." You laugh. "His fans are used to him being in relationships. The most they'd do is figure out who that is, which is me, but that's it."
"You won't get death threats?"
"His fans aren't crazy."
"Yeah? You seem pretty mental to me."
You gasp. "Rude." You look to the side, sucking your cheeks in. "But not wrong."
"Yeah. If you denied it, I'd just pull up every single time you'd fallen while trying to get good photos of Red Robin."
You pout. "Shoo. You said you had something due soon."
"Last question."
"Shoot."
"You don't mind that he's never going to date you?"
"Timmers." You laugh. "He's a hero and I'm a fan. It's like asking me if I'm ever going to date a billionaire. It's impossible. Not written in the stars. It's a groundless dream."
"Yeah?" His own heart cracks a little when you mention a billionaire.
"Yeah." You smile. "Now do your work. You have a GPA to take care of."
"Got it."
Tim finds that nearing the end of the semester, you meet with him less and less, tutoring him on Zoom instead, apologizing, explaining that you had a ton of creative work due for your other classes. You had been planning on graduating early, he finds out. It was your freshman year, and you were trying to get your sophomore classes out of the way. He was bothered. It was incredible — the sheer amount of classes you took. It was more impressive that you had time to write your own creative works.
"So?"
"How did you score last time? I'm starting to think you have me tutor you still because you're into me." You joke.
"Ninety. All we have left is the stupid final."
"You're set then." You yawn. "Why still have me tutor you?"
Your mind wanders as you click on one of your assignments. "Oh, how about this, then? I have an interview I need to conduct for my journalism class, and you'd be the perfect candidate. I'm expected to record it in the building and it's due in three days."
"Three days?"
"I bet you have everything out of the way, huh?" You smile at him, batting your lashes. "Hm?"
Tim, does, in fact, have everything out of the way.
"And if I don't?" He likes teasing you.
"Then I'll ask one of my friends. The topic is the discussion of a topic you aren't familiar with. You're good with coding, something I can't do past basic HTML to edit how text looks." You hum. "I'm grappling at every excuse I can to hang out with you, if you can't tell."
"Oh, I definitely can."
"Great." You smile. "How does tomorrow at 8 in the morning sound?"
"So early?" Tim raises a brow.
"I'll bring us coffee. Give me your order."
"Sold."
Tim realizes at 3am that you never gave him a dress code. Should he show up in casual? Business casual? Semi-formal? Formal — no, formal attire seemed like too much. He grimaces as he's in the Batcave, irritation all over his face.
"Something wrong, Timmers?" Dick raises a brow.
"Yeah. What do you wear to an interview?"
"Depends what kind." Bruce answers, pulling the cowl from his head. "Who's the interviewer? Is it official?"
"A friend is interviewing me for a project."
"Final project or just a project?"
"Forgot to ask."
"You can't go wrong with semi-formal. Dress like old money." Dick hums. "Polo shirt and khakis. Throw in a sweater tied around your neck and you should be good to go."
"I agree." Bruce hums.
"Do you need to impress said friend?" Jason raises a brow from behind the two.
"Wh-what does that have to do with the interview?"
Jason smirks at the stutter. "Get Steph to dress you. She'd make you look good and dress for the occasion."
"I think I'll go with Dick's—"
"Half-buttoned dress shirt and dress pants." Steph cuts in, pausing. "No, that'll make you look desperate. Grey sweats, blazer, and a white tee. Dark colored blazer but NOT black."
"Why can't I just wear a polo shirt and just—"
"You want to look good, right? Roll the sleeves up to right before your elbows. Mess up your hair a little too."
Tim sighs. "It's winter."
"Drake. Do you want to look good for your crush?" Damian cuts in.
"She's not a crush-"
"Last time you said that you were still pining after your ex." Steph laughs. "If you really want to look casual just wear what you normally wear but add some perfume."
"She's interviewing me for my major." Tim finally gets to speak.
"Then just dress like you normally do." Dick pats him on the back with a laugh. "Hoodie and sweats. Wear a tee underneath if in case you get hot so you can pull it over your head and she can watch."
"Hey-"
"I agree with that." Steph smiles. "If you're lucky, your shirt will ride up a little and she'll get to see—"
"Got it!" Tim yells, groaning. "My usual clothing it is. I'll bring a blazer in case she does want me to dress semi formal."
"Attaboy." Bruce ruffles his hair as he makes his way up.
Tim groans. He's not going to get enough sleep for this.
You call him in the morning when the coffee shop you frequent isn't open.
"Mm?" Tim furrows his brows, morning voice evident.
"Coffee shop closed. You mind if I just make one at the convenience store for you?"
"Knock yourself out. You're early."
"I need to set up the equipment." You hum.
"What color should I wear?"
"Something not green. I'm in red. See you in an hour."
"See you." Tim mumbles back, ending the call. He sits up, bed hair evident, staring at himself in the mirror. The exhausted part of himself wants to go back to sleep, but the better part of him — the giddy, excited, coming-of-age-has-a-crush-on-someone part of him — has him sit up from sheer willpower. (something he finds he has a lot of when it comes to you) He gets out of bed, pulling for the clothes he prepped the night before, combing his hair for once. He'd like to look nice for the camera, for you, he thinks. It would be a little frustrating to see the stand-in CEO of WE dress so casually. He has some sort of reputation to hold up when he isn't a student. Though he supposes he's being interviewed as a student, so there's not much of a need to dress so well.
But he supposes he wants to impress you.
He arrives five minutes before 8, locking his car and knocking on the door to the room.
"Hey," You smile at him.
"You didn't lock the door." He locks it behind him. "In Gotham during winter?"
"I knew you'd be here early." You adjust the cameras. "Your coffee's on the table."
"Thank you," He takes off his coat, hanging it on the rack. "Can I know what questions you'll be asking me?"
"Next to your coffee." You yawn. "You're dressed nice."
"Is it too little?" He smiles at you apologetically.
"No. Not at all." You smile. "Not when I'm dressed like," You motion at yourself. "This."
"You look like a friend." He points.
"Honored." You laugh. "The cameras are set up. I rented the room until 11. Take your time with the coffee."
"You're asking about me?"
"Yeah." You laugh. "The goal is to gradually have you talk about why you chose your major so we can have a relatively deep conversation. It's an intro to interviewing course, but the professor's ultimate goal was to make sure we make at least one friend."
"Yeah?" Tim puts his coffee down, smile on his lips. "Am I that friend?"
"Yeah," You smile back at him. "You can ask me questions too. It's supposed to be a casual interview. I'll only ask you a question when we run out of things to talk about."
Tim discovers a symphony of information from you. You open your heart to him the same way he can to some extent, smile on his lips when he tells you about his days during high school and his earlier relationships, forgetting that this was an interview for your class and that you would probably have to go through hours of footage in response to this. The plush of the seat is warm underneath him, your voice is a melody to his ears, Tim nodding along as you tell him about the one time you snuck out of the house as a teenager and got your ass beat because you got caught. The smile on your lips is contagious, he finds. He hadn't fallen for someone this hard since his ex.
Tim took you to lunch that day, desperate to get to know more about you, desperate to know you. He would have called it a date if you had let him.
You had your laptop pulled up, sorting through the footage (the three hour long footage) of the two of you's conversation, nodding along and rambling casually, clicking through to cut more personal matters from the interview, only required to give your teacher a clip and the raw file's total length to prove that you two hadn't just staged a conversation. You take a fry from his plate, your sandwich finished on your plate, humming when you finish editing.
"Are you always this fast?"
"Depends on what context." You wink.
"You were pretty fast to upload those new Red Robin photos too." If he noticed the sexual connotation of your words, he didn't mention anything.
"Well, other than lighting, I don't really need to edit anything."
"Speaking of which, do you even pay tuition?"
"Martha Wayne Scholarship." You yawn. "Your dad is looaaaded."
You submit your assignment to Canva, yawning. "That was my last one."
"You finished all those writing assignments?"
"Writing comes to me like hacking does to you." You close your laptop, tucking it into your bag. "Thanks for lunch, by the way."
"Mhm." He smiles. "Glad you liked your sandwich."
"My favorite." You hum. "So? Any updates? New girl? New boy? Relationship? Your dad adopted a new sibling? What's new?"
"Siblings keep teasing me."
"Oh? For what? For me?" You press a hand to your chest, wiggling your brows at him. You burst into laughter when he turns red. "Yeah? Because of me?"
"I asked them what I should wear to an interview, and suddenly they were asking me if I had a girlfriend."
"Yeah? So what did you tell them?"
"Interview from a friend." His eyes meet yours, eerily sincere. "Why?"
(the use of friend leaves a pang in your chest)
"Curious." You shrug. "So? Going anywhere for vacation?"
"Just Christmas at the Wayne Manor. You know, the rich people gala?"
You shudder, laughing. "Good luck."
"I'll need it. God knows who else I have to network with that night."
"Well, my dorm's open if you want it." You shrug. "But I doubt Bruce would let you leave since you are the CEO."
"Stand-in." He corrects.
"CEO nonetheless." You hum. "Should I send you a Christmas present?"
"What would you even send me?"
"It would be a surprise."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
Tim finds a gift from you under the Christmas tree, presumably placed there by Alfred. He had missed when you dropped it off, knocked out in the warmth of his bed without the pressure of an exam for once, letting himself ignore the cases he promised himself he'd solve. He promised you he'd get one day of proper sleep. Your texts are the only ones that cause his phone to vibrate during break. (He's down horrendously bad for you, Jason had whispered to Dick while Tim had responded to your message, lovesick grin on his face.)
Distance gives the soul time to think, and Tim thinks he's in love with you.
It comes as a revelation on Christmas morning, coffee mug warm in his hand as he watches his siblings open their Christmas gifts, laughing at certain ones and holding back his face from a smile breaking past his lips at others. He's third on the list to open his gifts, third son and all, and Tim finishes the last of his coffee, fingers reaching for his presents, all wrapped in a shade of red different from Jason's blood red. He thanks everyone for their gifts, raising a brow in amusement when he pulls out Damian's, a genuine smile breaking on his smile at Bruce's. Finally, he finds himself reaching for the gift you had gotten him, his fingers shaking as he breaks open the wrapping paper, smile on his face at the camera you got him. There's even an SD card and a battery charger part of the box you had prepped him.
"Oooh, Timmers is that from your girlfriend?"
"She's not my—"
The family breaks into teasing remarks as Tim groans, blush fresh on his skin, heart racing in his ears — that's when he realizes, the painful realization, a realization that breaks him into silence — he's in love with you.
Bruce has everyone move on as Steph sits down to open her gifts, and Tim's throat dries at the epiphany. He's in love with you — and that same lovesick smile breaks on his face as he wonders if you got his Christmas present. It was as if the two of you synced with the gift. Maybe he'd catch you taking photos of him with your camera. This time, he should stare back at you, flash you a smile, strike a pose, something, anything to fluster you. He was already looking forward to patrol that night. He picks up his mug, excusing himself quietly to get another cup of coffee, pulling his blanket with him as he clicks on his phone, placing his cup under the machine as he thanks you for the gift.
You respond immediately, video-calling him on accident, flustered state caught on camera, hair still a mess from waking up.
"I'm so sorry—"
Tim laughs. "It's fine. Are you home?"
"No. I slept over at a friend's place since my mom and I don't celebrate Christmas." You smile at him fondly. "I brought the gift you mailed to me, though. I haven't opened it yet."
"Let's say it's for your bird watching."
"You did not." You gasp, looking over your phone. "I'll have my friend record a video when we rip open our presents. Have fun on Christmas, Tim. Love you lots—"
Tim's face turns utterly red at the words, blinking wide-eyed at the now-ended call. You just... wow. He takes his mug of coffee, sitting back at his old seat where his siblings were, in a half-blissed-out state at your words. (He's told later on by your friend that you had sobbed into her chest when you realized you told him you loved him on accident.)
You text him sometime during the afternoon with the video of you opening your present, thanking him for his generous gift. You let him know that you'd send him your new photos with his present first, letting him see how good the quality of his camera could be. He texts you to sit on your dorm roof instead, and you ask if he was planning on kidnapping you. Maybe you'd let him take you for a swing. Instead, he tells you it's a present for your fanpage. You ask him if he's going to call Red Robin himself. He leaves you on read.
Bruce notices the way Tim's eerily giddy for a Christmas patrol, but he doesn't comment on it.
You exhale into the winter air, the cold piercing your lungs as you hold the camera between your gloved fingers, kicking your legs as you sit on the edge of the building, strap hung around your neck. You hum quietly as you watch the snow start, and a shadow looms over your shoulder.
"Hey." Tim smiles at you, Red Robin outfit on.
"Woah. He wasn't lying." You gasp. Your name spills past your lips, rambling about how you were his biggest fan. He stares at you through the whites of his domino mask, smile breaking onto his face.
"I've seen your Twitter."
"Yeah?" You exhale, eyes sparkling. "Honored. I hope you aren't going out of your way to visit me or anything. Gotham needs their vigilantes."
"And if I am?"
"Then you should go." Your cheeks flush from the winter warmth, and he steps close to you, forehead pressed to yours.
"You remember me from Halloween?"
"We have a thing with meeting on holidays, hm?" You laugh gently, eyes crinkling, Tim's expression softening.
"Yeah, we do." He hums, leaning in further. "May I?"
"Yeah." You exhale, lips finally pressed to his under the winter snow, his hands warm on your face as you lean in closer to him, chest pressed to his, lips parted to give him access to your mouth. Your head spins deliciously from the taste of his lips, his perfume reminding you of someone you know all too well, your mind muddled with the fact that you're actually making out with Red Robin, your celebrity crush. You whimper against his lips when he nips at your bottom one, his breath catching in his throat.
"Fuck, pretty girl. You can't just do that." He heaves, resting his forehead on yours again.
"Wow." You breathe, starstruck, eyes staring up at his.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." You laugh melodiously, and Tim feels his heart grow full. "Can I get a photo?"
"For you? Anything."
You make a Christmas post on your Twitter, photo of Red Robin with a Santa hat and white beard staying pinned for the Holiday season. (Tim wasn't allowed to live it down from his family, but he had gotten to kiss you stupid, so he was more than willing to take the jabs.)
He invites you to his place for New Year's Eve, invitation tumbling past his lips and nearly getting drowned out by his panicked rambling, cheeks red beyond repair and stutter catching in his throat, only for you to tell him that you'd "love to" and that you were "honored." You asked him if there was a dress code, and he told you it was fine. Even if the Wayne gala was that night, he would just sneak to his room when you arrived. He could finish socializing with the rich in a couple of minutes. Hell, he'd flirt his way out of it like Bruce did if it meant he could see you early. He tells you to arrive in a nice dress anyway, asking for your measurements so he could send you something. (You didn't want to give it to him, but he insisted.)
You pull up to the gala perfectly on time, ignoring the paparazzi asking you who invited you and making a beeline to who you assumed was Alfred and asking him if you could be taken to Tim's room. The gala wasn't somewhere you wanted to be, and Alfred had been more than welcoming, leading you and leaving you in Tim's room, telling you to make yourself comfortable since you were Tim's guest. You spent twenty minutes looking through his photobooks before he stumbled into his room, a little sweaty since he had been running.
"Hey." He smiles at you dorkily, smiling like a nerd in love.
"Wow. You're dressed nice." You mumble, staring him up and down.
"You don't look too bad yourself," He hums, locking his door behind himself. "Did you get to eat anything?"
"I ate before I came and made a beeline for Alfred when I came. Too many cameras."
"Sorry." He exhales. "Looking at my photos?"
"They're nice."
"They're from years ago." He hums. "Before my parents passed."
You mumble something under your breath, eyes meeting his in something akin to sadness.
"It's fine, now." Tim presses his thumb to the space between your brows, your expression relaxing immediately.
"Ah, right." You slip out the SD card from your purse, blinking at him. "You have a card reader?"
"Yeah." Tim sits in his chair, opening his laptop through some series of codes, holding his hand out for your SD card.
You drop it in his palm, his fingers drumming against the table as he opens the files.
"I got photos of Red Robin." You grin. "He was there on my dorm roof. Did you send him?"
"Yeah." He smiles. "Did you like the gift?"
"My Twitter loved it." You smile. You neglect to tell him that you had kissed Red Robin breathless. (Tim doesn't notice the way you get embarrassed, trying to fight off the red on his own cheeks when he remembers the way the two of you had made out on the roof.)
Tim pauses at the photo of him swinging away.
"Why didn't you post this one?"
"I was actually planning on posting it today." You hum. "The ones of him in action."
"You have multiple?"
You click into a folder, enter your password, showing him the photos.
"The camera's great, by the way. Red Robin may not have an ass as impressive as Nightwing, but he still has a nice ass." You laugh, clicking open the photos. Tim chokes on the air at the photos, and he laughs.
"Oh, yeah, Twitter would love this."
You shrug playfully. "What can I say? It pays."
Tim glances at the clock on the wall. Two minutes from midnight.
"How'd you spend the morning?"
"My friend came to pick me up so she could do my makeup." You laugh. "Then she brought me to the mall so we could get me some heels," You kick your legs to show him. "And then another friend, the one with a nice car, drove me here. My other friends insisted they watch me walk off to you. I forgot to tell them your last name after I asked for it, so they were quite surprised when they dropped me off her."
"Maybe I should thank your friends for helping you look so pretty."
"Yeah?" You smile, hopping to sit on his desk.
He stands up, pressing his forehead to yours, tucking your hair behind your ear, nose brushing yours.
"Yeah. What do they like?" Tim hums, your perfume flooding his senses again, his doing the same.
"Ever been told you share a perfume with Red Robin?" You whisper.
"No. You'd be the first."
"What's the brand?"
The brand falls onto silence as you press your lips to his, fireworks signaling the new year going off in the back. Tim's hands dig into your waist, eyes half-lidded, tongue pressing into yours with so much passion your knees might've gone weak had you not been already seated. Your hands find themselves tangled in his hair, pulling lightly when his hand finds itself on the zipper behind you. He pulls away for a moment, begging for your consent, asking if this was okay.
You had told him yes in a heartbeat.
Thus, Tim found himself enveloped with you, senses sent into overdrive, your skin pressed to his, sweat mixing with his, body tangled with his in his sheets — the same sheets he had thought about you so often in, the one where he had thought about you while he spilled into his hand, fingers pressed to your skin, mouth on your skin, sucking, biting, marking, doing whatever you would let him do to you. Your dress was long abandoned by his desk, his own suit leaving a trail toward the bed where he had you in his fingers.
He prayed this wouldn't be a foolish dream.
When he wakes in the morning, pulling you closer to his chest, your lashes fluttering against his skin, his heart warms. He should ask you to date him right now, he thinks. But his heart races in his chest, wondering if you would agree. Maybe the two of you had kissed in the heat of the moment, and you had let him have you because he had asked so nicely. He looks down at you as your eyes are completely open now, embarrassed smile on your face. He misses his chance.
"Good morning." He looks at you like you're his whole world.
"Good morning." You smile back at him like he's the universe.
The two of you fall back into the pace you had established the previous semester, this time without any classes together, only texting every now and then with updates. Tim hates this new life he lives. He misses seeing you during class and watching you play subway surfers on your phone or Bloons TD on your laptop. He opts for texting you during class instead, typing notes as he types responses to your messages. He wonders if you miss him the same way he misses you. He's too afraid to ask, still clinging onto the way your skin had felt on his during New Year's. It doesn't help that your department is halfway across the campus.
The next time he gets to see you, he's Red Robin, and he catches the familiar flash of your camera on the rooftop as he swerves into action. He finishes with the thugs easily, swinging back up to land next to you, your camera pressed to your chest, clicking capture as he raises a brow at you. You blink at him, smile on your lips. You don't look apologetic at all, almost cheekily. It was as if you knew he'd notice you.
"Hey."
"Hey." You beam at him. "Nice fight."
"Thank you. Care to tell me why you're out here during the February cold to get photos of me?"
"Because you're my favorite?" You blink at him, eyes wide.
"That's cute." He hums. "Shall I take you home?"
"Oh, if you could be so kind." You smile. "I had a friend drop me off nearby and I think he left already."
"Yeah?" Tim wraps an arm around your back, pressing you to him snugly, your arms wrapping around his neck. You close your eyes as the winter air hits your face, only for him to whisper into your ear. "Open your eyes."
Gotham looks breathless from wherever the hell Red Robin was in the air. Your breath catches in your throat, staring in awe as Tim swings from building to building, finally landing on the one where you dormed. You let go of him, cheeks warm from the air and the view, turning to look at him.
"Thank you. Thank you a lot." You smile at him, Tim mirroring your smile.
"Can I get a reward?" He had meant it as a joke, only for you to press your lips to his cheek, his eyes widening at the feeling.
"Is that good enough?"
"I was thinking something else, but that works too." He presses his lips to the corner of yours, smile on his face. "Stay safe."
"For you." You wave at him as he swings away from your building. You look through the photos you had gotten of him, going down the flight of stairs to the elevator. You had stuff to post for the rest of the month.
Tim finally bumps into you at the convenience store one fateful afternoon, reaching for your wrist before he could even register that he was scared you'd run off. He blinks at you as you blink back at him, tilting your head to offer him an awkward smile.
"Hey?"
"Hi. I'll pay, um, if you'll let me have a moment of your time."
"Yeah? Yeah." You nod dumbly. "That'd be fine. I don't have class right now."
"Yeah. I'll take your basket." He reaches for it naturally, swiping his card with ease. He hands you your stuff back, and you follow him, popping open your green tea.
"What'd you need me for?"
"Missed you."
"Yeah? I missed you too. It's weird not sharing a class anymore." You press the tea to your lips. "Missed me or the insanely good sex we had on New Year's—"
"You." Tim smiles. "Missed hearing your voice."
"Awh, what a cheeseball." You snicker, staring at the green start on the trees. "Cherry blossom season is approaching."
"Yeah. So are midterms." He shudders. "How's your classes?"
"You know, drowning in work in order to graduate early." You hum. "I'm writing something right now."
"For class?"
"Yeah. For fiction writing. The story has to be related to something you've experienced in college so far and I was wondering—" You inhale sharply through your teeth. "If I could write about us?"
"As your friend or as the guy you slept with on New Years?"
You open and close your mouth. "Both. Yeah. Both."
"May I read it after you finish?"
"I'll share the doc." You smile. "Thank you. I've been meaning to ask you."
"I'm honored that you'd write about me as a college experience."
"Yeah..." You trail off. "Oh, did you see my Twitter update? I got these super clear photos of Red Robin fighting thanks to the camera you gave me. Thank you, again."
"You're welcome." He hums. "Doing anything on Valentines?"
You puff out your cheeks. "Supposed to hang out with friends, but me and my other friend want to ditch so the two idiots would finally get to hang out without us third and fourth wheeling."
"So you're busy?"
"Not if you want to hang out." You tilt your head, capping your green tea.
"You'd do that for me?"
"Yeah." You hum. "But you'd have to make it worth ditching for."
"Oh, then leave everything to me." He hums, fingers brushing yours. "I'll pick you up around nine in the morning."
"And what time will you have me back?" You tease, pressing yourself closer to him.
"What time do you want to be back?"
"Whatever time you want." You hum. "Please pick me up in a nice car your dad owns. I want to see the interior of one of them."
"Sure." Tim hums. "Any other requests?"
"How should I dress?"
"Casual." He hums. "Do you want to match?"
"We can color coordinate." You gasp. "What color do you own the most of?"
"Red." He hums.
"Owh! We can match red." You grin.
Tim walks you back to your dorm, staring as you enter the elevator and disappear from view. He thinks a little about where he should bring you, lips pulling up lightly when he remembers something you had mentioned off-handedly in your interview with him. He knew now.
Tim shows up at your door with roses, your friends peering from behind the door as you take the flowers with him with a light flush on your cheek. You're dressed completely casual, red sweatpants matching his red hoodie, grey hoodie matching his sweats. You smile at him sweetly as you take the flowers from him, and your friends pull you aside, staring him down. One of your friends, bless her, tells him to treat you properly. She jabs a finger into his chest, going off about how she didn't care if he was some rich dude — the same rules applied, especially when it was your first relationship. Tim's eyes widen at the fact, your eyes darting to the side, a little embarrassed. Your other friends drag her off of him.
"Why didn't you tell me I'm your first?" He whispers.
You pout. "Didn't want to come off as inexperienced."
"That's not something to be embarrassed about." He hums.
"You would've treated me differently if you knew."
Tim sucks in a breath. "Yeah. I would've."
"Point proven." You hum. "Thank you for the flowers. They're very pretty."
He opens your door for you, waving bye to your friends. You sit there, staring at him as he stares at you.
"Where are we going?"
"Remembered how you joked about being taken on a first date to Costco?"
"No." Your jaw drops.
"I have a membership." He pulls the card from his wallet, and you gasp.
"You spoil me."
"Save that for when you're actually inside."
You fake a swoon, smiling at him sweetly, lips curled upward and brows relaxed. Tim hums, pulling on his own seatbelt, handing you the aux to the car, and you put the flowers onto the backseat. You plug your phone in as he starts driving, and you blink at all the buttons on the car.
"What are these for?"
"One of them's for missiles."
"What." Your jaw drops.
"I'm kidding." He laughs. "Most of them are for defense. Bruce's very into cars."
"I can tell." You mumble. "What are we getting at Costco?"
"Your green tea," He stops at the light. "And whatever else intruiges you."
"Can I get a Costco hotdog?"
"Yeah." He laughs. "You want a slice of pizza too?"
"Maybe." You scrunch your nose. "Moreso a hotdog."
"We can get whatever you want." Tim hums.
"Wow, if I didn't know better, I'd think you were trying to woo me." You laugh. (Tim hates the way he notices your eyes crinkle.)
"And if I am? It is Valentines."
"Woah." You mumble. "I didn't consider that."
"Yeah?" For someone so good at reading people, Tim sure struggled with reading you.
"I don't know." You frown. "Are you trying to swoon me? Or are you trying to get into my pants again?"
"Whichever one helps you sleep at night."
You laugh. "Using my own words?"
"You speak better than I do." He hums. "Do you want your hotdog first or later?"
"Later." You unlock your seatbelt, leaving the car. It looks awfully unassuming on the outside. Great for Gotham, you suppose.
"I'll push the cart." Tim holds his hand out for you and you take it, fingers wrapped in his. He lets go once he gets a cart, handing you his membership as you show the worker at the door. "Want a new iPad?"
"You know, I should make you buy Costco for me." You joke, patting his shoulder.
"Two hundred thirty two billion dollars? That's Bruce's money, not mine."
You snicker. "You have it memorized?"
"Stock trading for the company." He hums. "Stock is currently around five hundred dollars per stock."
"How the hell do you have time for schoolwork?"
"Coffee and an insane amount of self-discipline." He hums. "And revenge procrastination."
"At least you have some sort of weakness." You finally catch the drinks aisle, rushing in to find your green tea, Tim following behind you.
"I'll get it." He hums, reaching and pulling the green tea with ease, sliding it to the bottom of the cart. "Want anything else?"
"Can we browse?"
"Yeah."
You wander through the aisles, a comfortable silence washing over the two of you before you decide to speak up.
"Does Alfred need anything?"
"He's probably glad he has the house to himself for once." Tim hums. "Almost all of us are on a date."
You blink in surprise. "Even the youngest?"
"Except Damian." He hums. "Bruce is out too."
"Woah." You mumble. "The house must be quiet."
"Yeah." he hums.
"That did not answer my question." You pout.
"I texted. He sent a list." Tim mumbles, sharing the list. "You don't mind shopping for my family?"
"No." You smile. "I like grocery shopping with someone. It feels warm."
"Yeah? We're in the snacks aisle, so let's start there."
The two of you work your way through Costco, checking off Alfred's list of groceries, double-checking everything over when you finished. Tim grabs a rotisserie chicken for Alfred without it being on the list, and he grabs a tray of croissants, knowing Cass would probably want something sweet to snack on during the day. You text your friends to check if they want anything, and only one of them responds, telling you she's good. You have a feeling the other two are hooking up.
"Anything they want?"
"No." You smile.
"And you?"
"Just the green tea."
Tim raises a brow. "I'll feel bad if I only get stuff for my family while on a date with you."
"The tea is plenty." You beam. "I promise."
You help Tim unload the cart and then reload it, rocking on your feet as he swipes his card, not even checking the price twice, handing you the receipt as he pushes the cart out. The worker swipes the highlighter through the list, and Tim takes a right instead of a left.
"The car's—"
"Hotdog." He hums. "Can you get us two hotdogs? Card's in my wallet."
You take his card and get the hotdogs, tossing them into the cart as you hold the two paper cups.
"What do you want to drink?"
"What are you getting?"
"A little bit of everything."
"Then get me the same thing." He smiles.
You wonder if he's going to hate the flavor on his tongue. Though it's not your problem as you fill the cups, putting them in the holder as Tim pushes the cart back to his car, the two of you loading it into his trunk.
"We'll drop by my place first, and then we can drive to the next place I have planned." He takes the drink, straw in his lips. He blinks at the taste, eyes widening. "Wow. That's a flavor."
"Certainly is." You smile. "Like it?"
"Tastes like something Dick would have." He hums. "I'll push the cart. Get in the car."
You sit in the passenger's seat, opening your hot dog as Tim comes back.
"Ever had one before?" He opens his own, biting down.
"Yeah. My friends and I drop by pretty often." You hum. "Love the hotdogs."
"I should do that." He hums. "Alright. My house."
You chew on your hotdog as he heads toward his place, the music from your phone filling the car.
You wonder for a moment if Tim was actually into you. You have no doubt that you're important to him, but it was a little strange. You had slept with him before. What does that make you two? Friends with benefits? Friends who have slept together? Plain friends? A situationship? You chew on your bottom lip as he drives, mind elsewhere. Also, what were you with Red Robin? You can't call yourself a fan when you've had his tongue stuck down your throat before. There was too much to consider and ask. Maybe you should just ask Tim. (You don't, out of a fear of something. You're not too sure of what.)
When the two of you arrive, You help Tim sort the stuff into bags, carrying them to the front door as he unlocks it with ease, calling for Alfred and Damian to help with the groceries. Damian comes first, taking some of the bags from you, Alfred after him, showing you where the kitchen is.
"Thank you very much for running groceries for me, Master Tim." He nods. "You too, miss."
You smile. "No biggie. We were at Costco and I figured it'd be nice to do the groceries for you."
"It's very kind of you."
"Are you Drake's girlfriend?" Damian's next, eyeing you up and down, a scowl on his face.
"No?"
He frowns harder. "You deserve someone better."
"I really don't think—"
"Demon brat." Tim's voice comes out like a warning. "Don't tell my date to leave me."
"Is she not your girlfriend? I would have expected you to have already—"
"That's enough." Tim warns again, and Damian shuts up this time.
"Shall I prepare food for the two of you?"
"No need." Tim hums. "We have reservations."
"You made reservations? Do I need to change?" You follow after him, waving bye to Alfred and Damian.
"No. It's at the diner. It's Valentine's, which means there's twice as many couples there."
"Ohhh." You follow him into the car, sitting back down as he starts toward the diner again. "Is that all you had planned?"
"Also planned to take you home after this." He pauses. "My home. I was thinking we could use the movie room in the manor, granted none of my brothers get to it first. If that doesn't work, we can use the projector in my room."
"Are we gonna have sex?" You wiggle your brows playfully.
"If you want, I can have you screaming my name loud enough for Metropolis to hear."
You wince, looking to the side, embarrassed. "Holy shit."
"Expect the unexpected."
"I'm going to throw a milkshake at you for that."
"Cry about it."
The two of you get to the diner just in time for the reservation, your regular orders already memorized by the waiter. You're a little embarrassed, but you suppose it's not the worst thing ever. Tim finds the time asking if you enjoyed the day so far instead. You pull out your laptop as you wait for your order, continuing with the assignment due soon.
"Writing?"
"Yeah. Writing." You puff out your cheeks, fingers flying on the keyboard.
"What are you writing?"
You look up from your screen to stare at him. You don't say anything, but Tim gets the idea.
"Need a reference?"
"Actually," You lick your lips, scrolling up through the doc. "I'd like to meet Red Robin again."
"Your date's right here and you're talking about another man?"
"Writing fanfiction for him right now." You deadpan. "Need to know his kinks."
Tim coughs in embarrassment, forgetting how straightforward you could be.
"For a commission?"
"No. Out of curiosity." You pause. "I was curious to know what he would be into."
"Why not base him off of me?"
You raise a brow at Tim, swallowing thickly.
"Is this your way of telling me you don't want me writing fanfiction of other men?" You ask him one question, eyes asking another.
"Yeah." He smiles. "Yes to both questions."
You close your laptop when your milkshake and sandwich arrive, and Tim kicks you gently under the table.
"So what was the other question?" He raises a brow.
"I'll tell you in the car," You smile cheekily. Tim knows what the other question is. He just wanted to see if you were bold enough to ask him. The two of you continue with dinner, catching each other up with your friends' lives, smile on both of you's lips as the sun sets and the moon rises, Tim paying as he said he would. You take his hand into yours as the two of you walk to his car, and he opens the door for you, joining you on the other side.
"Before I ask," You lean over slightly, lips brushing his. "Can I have a kiss?"
"That's a question too, but I won't say no." He leans in for his lips to meet yours, hand moving to hold your face, tongue swiping on your bottom lip, darting into your mouth. You moan into the kiss as his other hand squeezes your waist, and you pull away from him suddenly, licking your lips for whatever taste of him was left. You grin at him cheekily, reaching to wipe the lipstick from around his lips, your voice lowering.
"The question I actually wanted to ask was if you were Red Robin." You grin, wiping the lipstick on a napkin leftover from Costco. "And I knew you'd read it off of me."
"How'd you guess?" He tilts his head at you, eyes still on your lips.
"First it was your perfume," You smile. "Then it was the way you kissed me." You pop the vanity mirror down, reaching into your hoodie for your lipstick. "Not to mention the way your forearms feel the same. Both of you have a specific way that you hold me when making out. I think that was the nail in the coffin."
You pucker your lips when you finish with the lipstick, tossing it back into your hoodie, closing the vanity mirror.
"So? Where are we headed now?"
"My place." He mumbles. "Have to have you."
"You could have me in the car."
"As much as I would like that," He exhales. "That would be very uncomfortable for you."
"Can I have you in the costume sometime later on?" You bat your lashes at him. "If you'd let me, of course."
"Yeah. Anything you want." His head thumps as he stops at the light.
There's a long, drawling silence before you speak up. You're scared, but you might as well ask.
"What are we, again?" You lean over slightly to stare at him. Tim notices you haven't put music on.
"If you'd let me," Tim licks his lips, "lovers."
"Then lovers we are."
The second time Tim gets to have you, he's so much gentler, fingers kneading the skin between them, curling them inside of you until you're a whimpering mess, worried that you'd wake someone in his family, his kisses assuring you that all of his brothers were out doing the same thing he was, wining and dining someone they loved, rooms also soundproof. Tim goes back to you after that, soaked fingers and sheets, licking your cum from his fingers, eyes locked with yours the entire time, pressing his lips to yours after he finishes. Your eyes roll back at how lewd he was being, but you suppose it's what the two of you deserve after flirting for so long.
Tim makes sure you're properly pampered in bed, your legs twitching after your third orgasm, begging for him to fuck you, tears in your eyes. How could he say no? Not when you looked so dazzling under him. He seems to understand something as he pushes into you this time, pausing to drink your form in, still as pretty as you had been before. This time, arguably prettier. You were so much prettier when you were crying about how you were his, cunt still oversensitive from your previous orgasms. Your face twists in pleasure, crying about how you were unable to take another release yet relenting as Tim drilled into you. You have no idea how he has the energy, and you're too tired to ask when he finishes.
You grimace as he peels you from the bed, setting you on the tile seat as he starts a shower for the two of you.
"I love you." You mumble. Not on accident or out of habit this time.
"How long?"
You exhale. "Don't remember."
"Approximation."
"Since I fell at your feet at orientation, maybe." You whisper into the mist as he helps you wash up.
"I love you too." Tim mumbles into your skin as he presses a kiss to where he had left hickeys.
"How long?" You repeat his question, staring at him as he stares down at you, moving the shower head to wash the bubbles from your skin.
"Since Christmas." He whispers back.
You smile at him.
"Since I told you I loved you on accident?"
"Yeah." He stops the water, wrapping you in a towel, drying you. You hum in satisfaction as he dries the two of you off, your fingers warm around his wrist when you grow tired.
"Can we sleep? I usually air dry my hair."
"Yeah." He presses a kiss to the crook of your neck, lifting you into his arms as he takes the two of you back to bed.
"What tag would you put on our story?"
"Idiots in love." You smile as you drift off, and Tim presses his lips to your forehead.
His tag would have been requited love.
#tim drake x reader#dc x reader#red robin x reader#☾.nsfw#guys this fic is everythign to me btw I like love this fic#easily top 5 fics I've ever written#tim drake imagine#red robin imagine#☾.fics#☾.pretty bird
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omg I just wanted to say that "Raising Hell" changed my brain chemistry when I first read it in... 2020-2021? I had always liked the kai-nya-lloyd dynamic as a kid and that fic really just solidified that for me. Easily in the top 5 fics i've ever read
ADGFDH thank you so much?? raising hell is very near and dear to my heart so it means a lot to hear that :'D it's definitely the longest fic i've ever written in my life (continuously) which says a lot about how much i love the RGB dynamic myself
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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers! Spread the self-love 💞
@dangerpronebuddie also asked me to share. Thank you to both :)
I've been in fandom for a long time, so I'll pick my top 5 for my current obsession. All Buddie. This list changes often. lol
.
We Found Each Other (Over There)
A combat medic and a G.I. meet during one of the world’s greatest battles. A WWII European Theater based AU.
Trying Hard to Remember, Trying Hard To Forget
Eddie doesn’t remember the shooting and Buck is haunted by it. As they struggle with their feelings for each other, Eddie and Buck grapple with the realities of trauma recovery and the understanding that everyone heals at their own pace. Coda to 4.14.
bro·ken
adjective 1. having been fractured or damaged and no longer in one piece or in working order. 2. having given up all hope; despairing.
Forced to take shady side jobs to pay his bills, Evan Buckley doesn’t think he’s ever seen such rock bottom. Until he meets Eddie Diaz, a man even more desperate and alone. Season 3 AU.
Alone In The Dark With You
Buck couldn’t remain here alone with all his racing thoughts. Catastrophizing. That’s what his therapist called it. He had to move. He continued trying to dig his way with his good hand, but the way the rocks had fallen, if he removed one, another took its place. It was like he was inside an hourglass.
But he wouldn’t give up.
There. Was he hearing things? A scraping sound.
His adrenaline spiked. He pawed at the rocks again, because noise meant movement and movement meant—
“Buck?”
“Eddie?” Buck rasped.
He was alive! Eddie was alive.
(Or Buck and Eddie get trapped in a cave-in and things go from bad to worse.)
Cutting The Ties That Bind
Evan Buckley was a businessman, he had meetings and deadlines like everyone else. Sometimes he used intimation. While using the very same tactics he was trying to end while converting his family business into legitimate operations was a little hypocritical, it was the results that mattered.
Occasionally, he got threatened, but it was usually all hot air and ego. That all changed the day his breaks were tampered with. Enter Eddie Diaz, security specialist, who was not easily impressed by Buck’s expensive suits or financial conquests. That was okay. Buck enjoyed a challenge.
(The Mafia AU)
A little of everything :)
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Fanfiction Author Interview Game
Thank you @brendadaaedestler for the tag!
How many works do you have on AO3?
30 as it stands!
What's your total AO3 word count?
591,986
Your top 5 stories by kudos:
Sticky Notes and Serendipity // collab with @brendadaaedestler // Erik/Christine long-fic // 224 kudos
Say You'll Share With Me // oneshot collection, mostly Erik/Christine // 143 kudos
Our Little Home // oneshot // Erik/Christine // 139 kudos
Starting Fresh // twoshot // Erik/Christine // 99 kudos
my heart is home when my hand is in yours // oneshot collection, collab with @brendadaaedestler // mostly Erik/Christine // 83 kudos
Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
I always do! I love seeing readers interacting with my fics and sharing what they enjoyed about them, and I always want to show my appreciation for those comments. The only reason I wouldn't is if I missed it somehow or if my frequent co-author has beaten me to the punch and replied already.
What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?
It's probably Sleep So Long Awaited, which is a play on the end of LND where Erik dies instead of Christine. It's sad, it's got sad Gustave, a moment of peace between Erik and Raoul, and...well, Erik dies. It's not a happy story.
What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?
I would definitely say Sticky Notes and Serendipity! The epilogue hasn't gone up yet, but it's super fluffy and sweet, and the entire fic just came to such a happy, wonderful ending. You'll see what I mean on Saturday 😉
Do you write crossovers?
I don't, no. I might write fics inspired by another piece of media, but I wouldn't think I would ever write a proper crossover.
Have you ever received hate on a fic?
Not direct hate? I once received some criticism that was DM'd to me that was definitely not asked for and unnecessary, so that sucked. It was really a big blow to me, and I considered taking down that fic after receiving that comment because it made me super insecure about the entire format of the fic. It came from a person who had been very supportive of my stories for a long time, which made it even worse. Thankfully, my best friend convinced me not to take the fic down, and my critic has now been exposed for not being a good person, so it all worked out in the end.
Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
I don't write it and I won't be writing it.
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Yep, I have had my fics scraped and posted on other websites at least twice, either by bots or by another user.
Have you ever had a fic translated?
I have not! Someone offered to translate Like Father, Like Son, but my coauthor on that story was not keen on the idea. It's something I would have to consider because I think I would worry too much about my style and plans for the story being lost in translation and I wouldn't be able to really tell. I wouldn't totally write it off, though!
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Ohhhh yes! Like Father, Like Son was my first collaboration, and I write probably about half of my fics these days with my best friend @brendadaaedestler. We have something in the works for NaNoWriMo as we speak!
What's your all-time favourite ship?
Definitely Erik/Christine, I love writing with them and reading about them so very much.
What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?
It's not one that I don't think I will ever finish, but I think it will be a while before No Need For Goodbyes ever gets finished. I would love to go back to it, but I've been away from that cast of characters for so long that it can be hard to slip back in. My coauthor also no longer has the time to work on it with me, and it is a very time-consuming project, so I'm not sure when I will get back to it.
What are your writing strengths?
I think that dialogue is definitely my strength. It comes very easily to me and it's something that I always enjoy getting to write.
What are your writing weaknesses?
Getting lost in the dialogue! Sometimes I get so caught up in what the characters are saying and the emotions that they're expressing that the writing can get dialogue-heavy. I always have to make a conscious effort to include scene descriptions, settings, and descriptions of the character's bodies and expressions.
What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?
This is an interesting question that I honestly don't think about a ton lol? I've always been pretty content writing Phantom fic and don't really have the inspiration to jump into other fandoms. Shipwise, I've only written sporadic Meg/Erik fic and only a long time ago, so that one could be fun to explore. There is angst there.
What's your favourite fic that you've written?
It was Like Father, Like Son for the longest time because it was my first Phantom of the Opera fic, my first long fic, I loved the characters, etc. I'm still super proud of that story, but I think Sticky Notes and Serendipity takes the cake. It's my first true multi-chapter fic since LFLS, and I can just see how much my style has changed, how much my writing has improved, and it makes me feel really good about myself. I am in love with the versions of the characters that we wrote, and getting to work so much with Erik's anxiety and making it feel so authentic was a crowning achievement for me. Also, seeing all of the love for the story that Chloe and I have written together makes me feel so amazing. Sticky Notes is my favourite for so many reasons.
Tagging: @starlitexpress @intothemertensverse @sloanedestler @ablatheringblatherskite @shinyfire-0 @paperandsong @jennyfair7 and anyone else who wants to play!
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Thanks to @lisbeth-kk for tagging me.
Fic Writer's Meme
How many works do you have on ao3?
I have 28! 18 in Sherlock, 6 in Star Trek: Voyager, and 4 Good Omens.
What’s your total word count?
182,614, a majority of which is Kinesis, but as a person who has always struggled with completing things, the 100,000+ words that aren't Kinesis are a real victory in my head.
What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
Kinesis (Mystrade), The Interrogation of Anthony Crowley, Witch (Ineffable husbands co-written with @mevima), Avast Ye Merry Gentlemen (Johnlock Christmas), The Bold and the Bruised (Mystrade 360MG), Atonement (Janeway/Chakotay post-series reconciliation).
Do you respond to comments? Why/why not?
Absolutely! I love comments. If I haven't responded to a comment it's only because life has been eating my brain and I will get to it once I've recovered.
What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?
Probably All the Time it Takes to Wait, which is titled after a song I played obsessively at the time while I was dreaming up the scenario of Chakotay actually getting to have feelings about the whole Fair Haven disaster. Nothing is resolved but they have it out. The song is angsty and so is the fic.
What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?
It's gotta be Kinesis. Not to overhype, but the ending is pretty satisfying and joyful.
Do you write crossovers?
I have the outline of a Sherlock/Star Trek crossover in my WIP pile.
Have you ever received hate on a fic?
No, but I can't wait. Bring it on, internet. I love an argument. I love to analyze the fears and insecurities of people who start fights on the internet over free content lovingly created and bravely posted. I am unhinged and ruthless.
Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Hell yes. Smut has been an essential part of my recovery from religion, both the reading and writing of. Smut is so revealing of a character's motivations, their vulnerabilitites, their desires. I think it's a marvellous thing.
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not to my knowledge. If so, I'd rather not know.
Have you ever had a fic translated?
No.
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Yes, the aforementioned The Interrogation of Anthony Crowley, Witch was so much fun to write with @mevima. It was way outside my comfort zone, kinkier and darker than anything else I've written.
What's your all-time favourite ship?
Johnlock and Mystrade are forever duking it out in my head. I also love Ed and Stede's speedrun enemies-to-besties-to-lovers dynamic in OFMD.
What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?
Never say never, right? I have another long one that could be a Good Omens AU set in Toronto in the early 90s. Because it's last on my list of long fics, I don't know when I'm going to get to it. Also all the garbage behaviour of a certain writer/creator has really sapped my enthusiasm for writing in the fandom right now. I had a thought to turn it into an OFMD fic but I'm not sure if or when I'll get around to it.
What are your writing strengths?
Dialogue is my friend. If I get stuck in a scene, I just make the characters talk and it helps me move on. Comes from a background in writing plays.
What are your writing weaknesses?
Endings! Spare me from having to finish anything. I get burnt out and distracted easily but I'm learning to manage it. I look forward to the times when the story really flows, but since most days are not like that, it's about finding ways to write the next 5, 10, 500 words.
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
Like so many things, I don't think there should be hard and fast rules about what writers can and cannot do. For me, I'd be inclined to check with a native speaker if I can find one, but keeping in mind that this is not a professional venture, I think foreign dialogue in fic is a "do your best and be forgiving" venture.
That said, if a writer chooses not to get a native speaker to weigh in on their usage and they get comments like "Hey you bum. Don't use google translate for this!" we have to be willing to take our lumps and seize the opportunity: "My hero! Will you look at the rest of my dialogue for me?" Fandom is about connection building.
What was the first fandom you wrote for?
My first creative writing project in first grade was an origin story for a talking boot puppet in a horrifying Canadian children's program called Readalong. But I had no idea what a fanfic was at the time.
My first intentional fanfic might have been an unpublished Sailor Moon or Mulder/Scully fic that may live on in a hard drive somewhere.
First fic on AO3 is actually poetry called Not a Romance about what Kathryn Janeway was thinking after the episode Resolutions.
What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?
Our Flag Means Death. Probably Ed/Stede but there are so many great characters, it might be hard to choose.
What's your favourite fic you've written?
Kinesis. It's the fic I've always wanted to write. It has some of my favourite vibes. And I derived great joy from firing Mycroft Holmes.
Tagging @hubblegleeflower @may-shepard @the-toad-in-your-piano @copperplatebeech @blogstandbygo @fearlessdiva930 @cirquedereve @antheiasilva if you feel like answering and haven't already been tagged. I tag anyone who sees this and wants to answer (please @ me in your response and I will reblog).
If you see this and you're more of a reader, tag your favourite writers in a reblog or the notes. Seriously, this goes for anything. If you tag me on your original posts, I will gladly reblog and hype your content.
#fandom love and appreciation#fic writers#celebrating accomplishments#good omens#ineffable husbands#sherlock fandom#johnlock#mystrade#star trek voyager#janeway x chakotay
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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. spread the self-love ❤
Bunny-senpai!!! 💕
I answered an ask similar to this one last year in March and I don't think my answers have changed...
I rewrote each blurb haha, so it's not an exact copy-paste from before.
1 “It’s No Secret” - Rated M, High School AU, Multi-chapter, Incomplete. Hinata returns to Konoha after 5 years studying abroad in the Moon Kingdom. She just wants to enjoy her last year of high school as a normal girl, but blossoming love forces her to confront her future. - My top fave. Back then, I wrote this like I was possessed. This story consumed my mind, and I was posting chapters every 1 or 2 weeks. I'm amazed at myself from back then. No, it's not my technically best writing, but I was having so much fun thinking up all kinds of scenes!!! Oh, to be a fanfic writing newbie all over again. Major love to everyone who's read this flirty teenage shenanigans mess and enjoyed it!!! One day I will write part two 🥺
2 “Nightdreams” - Rated E, Canon-Divergent AU, Multi-chapter, Complete. Naruto and Hinata find comfort in each other after the war. - This fic idea came to me sometime after I read agitosgirl's "A Special Friend," and I wanted Moooooore!!! I wanted more of this hurt/comfort dynamic between NaruHina!!!! So bam, the fic almost wrote itself, it flowed so easily (except for when it didn't). I'm so happy that people reread this fic, and then tell me that they're rereading it :D. Once in awhile I reread it, too, and think, oh, I should fix that sentence, or whatever loll, but I don't. I kind of think it's nice to leave it as it is, imperfect in little ways to bother me. Please read this fic and recognize that I was copying Katarinahime's writing techniques throughout.
3 “Awkward Jocks” - Rated G, 1990s High School AU, Multi-chapter, Complete. She knows that if he were to ever ask her out, she would accept in a heartbeat. After all, he’s the star quarterback and basketball player. Plus, she’s liked him since…forever. But when her home phone rings, and he’s on the other line, she hangs up. - It's interesting to me that even after all the fics I've written over the years, it's a few of my oldest fics that take the top 3. I guess I really have been trying to write for myself since the start. This one is based off of my ex-coworker's love story. Even though I don't work with her anymore, I still think of her as my role model for good leadership. When you read this, I hope you can feel how much I love her!
4 “About You” - Rated G, 1970s High School AU, One-shot. A summer job at the Dole pineapple cannery, graveyard shift 10 PM to 6 AM. A long bus ride into and out of town. Two teens, shy beside each other. - This is my most personal fanfic. Based on stories my parents told me and stories I found online from people of their generation, I tried to dive into their time using NaruHina. Ever since I was inspired to write after reading emmykay's "Torch Song," I had wanted to write a fic with Japanese-Hawaiian pidgin dialogue. This fic is close to my heart, but it's not higher on the list because there are inaccurate details that bother me 😅. I'm thinking of writing a fic about my great grandparents' generation one day, I've done a ton of research for it! Anyway, I'm so happy that others love this fanfic, too.
5 “Matcha” from “Shared Vows” - Rated T, Canon-Compliant, One-shot. Naruto calls Hiashi “father” for the first time. - According to my previous blurb, I picked this one because I loved how I structured it, I thought I wrote it really well. I also loved the notion of Naruto finding his own family. On deeper reflection, I think I also picked this one over "Finally Home" because I have a not-so-secret agenda for reconciliation between Hinata and Hiashi, fed by my own family's dynamic with my dad.
If I were to recommend any one of these for someone to read, I'd say they should start with Nightdreams or Matcha as an intro to some of my work since canon universe fanfic is always easier to digest.
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Purely Instinctive | Ki//ller Pet//er
Extremely competent assassin who handles every difficult situation inventively and with ease? What if he fell ill... 😭 (4.2k words)
This is a little different from what I usually write, but I've been reading Ki//ller Pe//ter on Webt//oon (link), and... um, this fic practically wrote itself. This might be the most self-indulgent thing I've written this year. Let's not talk about it 😭
For the sake of the fic, all characters are in their early twenties (aside from Peter, who is obviously a lot older). If you haven't read the series, they're all assassins who work for an organization called the Gl//ory Club. That's pretty much all you need to know :)
—
Here's Peter (under his current identity, Sun-Gu Kim) and Yuna:
—
The drive to the warehouse is unusually quiet.
The mission is simple—find an international spy, currently en route to escape via a ship which departs from the harbor at 6am, holding onto highly classified documents which he’s not supposed to have. The moment he steps foot off of Korean land, he will become much more difficult to apprehend—the ship the target is planning to take is a large cargo ship, its whereabouts easily tracked, but the Glory Club bounty has specified that the target will most likely part ways from the cargo ship on a small rowboat. There’s no telling at what point he’ll split off from the cargo ship, or where he’ll be headed next, which means:
They have only two hours to apprehend the subject before he becomes substantially harder to track down.
Yuna reaches up with a hand to rub her eyes. Of course, serving as part of Glory is no 9-5 job—she hadn’t expected volunteer missions to always take place at predictable times. But they’d gotten assigned to this particular mission on short notice, which meant that she’d gotten maybe three hours of sleep, tops, before having to drag herself out of bed for this.
They’d been whisked out on Sun-Gu’s motorcycle—the St. Petrus V4, she recalls. Somehow, Sun-Gu had known exactly where to head. How he’d known, with the entire city laid out in front of him, Yuna isn’t entirely sure. But he’d explained that the target’s trajectory would probably not be a straight line to the harbor—that would be too easy to intercept, and Sun-Gu had assured the target would be aware there would be someone on his trail. He’d probably avoid main roads, then, where there would be a higher chance of getting stopped by the police. Then, out of all the remaining routes from his last tracked location, it would only be feasible to get to the dock on time through six of them.
The rest had been intuition. Sun-Gu’s familiarity with the city is impressive. He barely glances at the street signs as he drives, the night warm and stagnant, his motorcycle dialed to silent, and not for the first time, Yuna wonders how he seems to know all of this.
Speaking of Sun-Gu—
Something is different about him tonight. Yuna probably would not have noticed, had she not spent the entirety of the motorcycle ride sitting behind him. He’s incredibly subtle about it. But it’s there, nonetheless—a slight change to his demeanor. Something nearly imperceptible, something she can’t quite pin down.
Had Yuna not known better, she might have attributed it to tiredness. But in the couple months she’s known Sun-Gu, she’s never seen him tired. He sleeps, like the rest of them, of course—he is only human—but for him, the transition between sleep and wakefulness seems like more of a formality. That is to say, he wakes up immediately alert, and she doesn’t think she’s ever seen him tired.
It makes her wonder, a little, if there’s a reason to it. If there was ever anything in his life which mandated being a light sleeper, that required him to be up at a moment’s notice. Either way, it’s not the reason why he’s—off isn’t the right word. Different is more suitable. Typically, he’s in better spirits. But Yuna has seen him pissed off, and this isn’t it, either.
Sun-Gu parks the motorcycle just outside of the warehouse, unclips his helmet in one swift motion, and—after Yuna gets off—takes her helmet from her and stashes them both under the motorcycle seat, which Glory has designed to be self-locking. Then, without waiting to see if they’ll follow, he makes a lap around the periphery of the warehouse.
The Dokgo brothers have tagged along too—they’re being quiet, now, which perhaps is mercy enough. Probably Sun-Gu had given them a challenge to shut up, and they’ve taken it in good faith. Now, even when they have something to comment, they keep their voices to a whisper.
“What do you think he’s off doing?” Biggie says.
Junior shrugs. “Maybe taking a walk, to relieve some stress.”
“He’s looking for signs of entry,” Yuna tells them. Then, because she can’t help it, and because she’ll be a little pissed off if they’re the ones who end up jeopardizing the mission—“Remember what he said about being quiet?”
“Ah, shit,” Biggie says. “I am quiet. Maybe you should be quiet. Have you considered that?”
She ignores the both of them and heads over to the spot where Sun-Gu stands, now, his eyebrows furrowed. A slat that’s out of place. He pushes it, and it budges.
Underground, the ground rumbles underneath them, and then settles to reveal a trap door.
Sun-Gu beckons for them to follow him, but he doesn’t wait up for them. Yuna quickens her pace to keep up. The trap door leads them down, down. The air underground is much cooler—Yuna finds herself wishing that she’d brought a thicker jacket.
Ahead of her, Sun-Gu—
Takes in a sharp breath. But no, it’s not just a breath. As she watches him, he lifts a hand, pinches it to the bridge of his nose. His shoulders jerk forward, though only slightly; his back muscles tense. All in all, the entire display is soundless.
Yuna’s feels her eyebrows creep up.
This is certainly… new for him. But she doesn’t have time to think on it right now.
When they get to the bottom of the steps, the stairway opens out into a deserted hallway: cement walls, cement floors. It’s dark, and cavernous. This whole place feels empty. It’s a little creepy, really. Why Sun-Gu suspects that their target is hiding out here, Yuna isn’t sure. It seems counterproductive to hide out somewhere like this when, according to their intel, the subject has limited time already to make it out to the harbor.
That is, unless Sun-Gu suspects the intel that they were given might be wrong.
Sun-Gu switches on a flashlight he’s carrying and heads deeper in. It’s not until he stops, looking down the hallway to survey his surroundings that he hesitates, only for a moment. He lifts the collar of his shirt over his face, his shoulders tensing.
“Hh’—nKTtt-!”
The sneeze is practically soundless. That makes two times in one night. Something is definitely up, then. Yuna looks around. Perhaps the underground space is dusty, or perhaps it’s not well-ventilated and it’s grown mold, and he’s allergic. Except, the air down here feels remarkably dry—not the sort of environment mold would thrive under—and the floors look suspiciously well-maintained. It wouldn’t make sense for it to be something else, either—some other universal irritant. Sun-Gu is the only one here who’s sneezing.
Yuna isn’t sure she’s ever heard him sneeze before, out of the months that she’s known him. Could it be some existing condition, then—not a product of their environment, but something from earlier?
“Man,” Junior mouths, from somewhere. “How much longer are we going to have to head down these hallways? They all look the same.”
Yuna turns to glare at him, puts her finger to her lips. “Longer if you aren’t quiet about it.”
“I don’t like this,” Biggie mutters. “When can we get to the fighting? All the lead-up is boring. It feels like we’re in some kind of horror movie.” Yuna squeezes her eyes shut, prays that they’re far enough from Sun-Gu—and, by extension, the target—that they can’t be heard.
Sun-Gu stops, abruptly. He holds a hand up behind him, as if to say, stay back.
Yuna doesn’t know what he’s noticed, at first. But a moment later, she hears it—the click of a latch being undone, somewhere overhead.
Above them, a small trap door opens, and then pulls shut. A cylinder drops from the ceiling, leeching violet plumes of smoke. On instinct, Yuna pulls her shirt up to cover her nose and mouth.
Tear gas, she realizes—or something chemically similar. It’s some sort of aerosolized compound, meant to render them both less capable of seeing and—partly by extension—less capable of fighting. Her eyes tear up almost immediately, so much that she can barely keep them open. Her lungs burn in protest as she takes in a breath.
They’re in a long corridor. There’s a finite amount of smoke coming from the canister—if they wait it out, it will inevitably thin out. So this was more just a distraction, then. A flashy entry. Just enough time for whoever they’re up against to—
It takes her a few seconds to spot the figure through the smoke.
She thinks back to the files on the subject. Medium, reddish brown hair, pale blue eyes. 182 cm. Trained in combat. The stranger in the hallway has their face obscured by a gas mask, their hair hidden under a hood, but she can tell by the musculature of their exposed arms that they appear to be well-trained. In their right hand, they are carrying a long, slender weapon. From one end—attached to a metal chain—is a sphere, lined with spikes, each of them carved down to a sharp point.
It must weigh half a ton, from the way it drags the chain down, but the figure wields it easily, as if it weighs absolutely nothing.
“That’s our guy!” Junior yells, at the same time as Biggie shouts, “Stop right there!”
Both of them charge forwards. It all happens in a split second. The figure adjusts their grip on the weapon to turn the wooden handle of it outwards. Then, before either of the brothers have a chance to react, they’re swung outwards by the sheer momentum of the rod. Biggie hits the ceiling with enough force that the concrete above them rumbles, the impact spiderwebbing the ceiling above them. Slabs of concrete rain down from the point of contact. The figure drives Junior straight into one of the walls at an awkward angle which renders him almost immediately unconscious.
Yuna can feel her own heart pounding in her ears. She slinks back into the darkness, pressing herself to the ground so that hopefully, the stranger will forget that she is there—or that she is even a threat to begin with. Seeing what they’re capable of, she isn’t sure she could do much in this situation to begin with.
How long has it been since the last time the path split off into multiple routes? When Yuna turns to look, the hallway before them and after them seems to stretch on and on. An endless concrete tunnel, with the white, sterile lighting of a laboratory space. Nothing to shield themselves with, and nowhere to hide. It’s a strange location to pick a fight in. What exactly was this place built for?
“I’ve been waiting for you,” the figure says to Sun-Gu, grinning. Half of their teeth have been replaced with gold tooth crowns. When they grin, the gold catches the light, winking. “Thirty seconds, huh? Your teammates couldn’t even hold their own for that long? It’s a damn shame. I didn’t even get to use the weapon as it’s intended to be used.” They tilt their head, staring down at Sun-Gu with a look of contempt. “I guess you could thank me for being merciful. But if I’m honest…”
Their smile darkens into something sharper, something hungry. “I just didn’t want to stain a flail of this quality with anyone’s blood but yours.”
Was this entire mission a setup, to get Sun-Gu into one place? Is the subject really in possession of any classified documents at all?
Sun-Gu twists away—not to evade, or not in preparation to attack. His shoulders hunch forward, his expression twisting. He coughs, roughly, down towards the ground. It’s the kind of cough that suggests that he’s been coughing like this for some time now—harsh and throat-scraping.
That’s when it registers for Yuna.
He’s ill. It seems painfully obvious, in hindsight, now that she’s realized it.
During the motorcycle ride here, he’d been careful not to touch her, Yuna realizes. Sun-Gu is always careful with his own space—he has an awareness of it, even outside of combat, that she thinks would be unusual for most. Even with small things—the ways he gestures, the way he holds himself—she gets the feeling that none of it is accidental.
When she looks at him now, she notices—a slight, near-imperceptible flush to his features. He’s breathing a little more heavily than normal. Instincts he can hide. Instincts he can cover for. But there are some things which no amount of physical awareness can hide.
He has a fever, then. That’s probably why he hadn’t wanted her to touch him. He’d known that if she’d made contact with his skin, she would’ve felt it, and she thinks he probably hadn’t wanted to raise any concern.
Sun-Gu is here, on a mission, fighting a well-trained stranger on his own, equipped with nothing but a pocket knife, with no armor and no with no reinforcements. On any normal occasion, Yuna might trust him to be able to hold his own—she’s seen what he’s done, alone against a crowd of hundreds—but this time, it’s different, because Sun-Gu is unwell.
The figure looks surprised, at this. “Ah,” they say. Yuna can’t help but think they look like a predator, honing in on their prey, only to find that said prey is already bloodied and limping. Like someone surprised—but pleased—to find their job already done for them. “Don’t tell me you’re already not in tip-top shape? That’s a shame.”
Sun-Gu coughs, again, his chest shaking. Yuna feels a pang of worry in her chest. He really does look unwell—and he hasn’t said as much of a word to deny it, which is telling. She looks around for anything to help him with— If she were to call for reinforcements, she thinks it would take too long for them to find them all here, underground, in the elaborate array of tunnels.
The weapon they’re holding is heavy, which affects its maneuverability, and to some degree, its speed. But Sun-Gu’s knife is much more of a close-range weapon, which means that while Sun-Gu will have to get up close to them to even make a mark, the stranger would be theoretically able to fatally wound him while standing a meter away.
The figure presses forward. With the swing of one hand, the metal ball and the chain arc outwards neatly, directly towards Sun-Gu. For such a heavy weapon, Yuna is surprised to find that this person wields it with impressive speed. It’s nearly too fast for her eyes to track. Sun-Gu evades, easily, but the figure swings again, and again, and again. At this speed, it almost looks as though they’re slicing the air into shreds.
If Sun-Gu were to be hit, his body would stop all of the momentum at once, and the spikes would easily puncture skin, drive themselves into tissue and skin and bone. Worse, Yuna realizes, if the weapon makes it to Sun-Gu’s body—even if it’s lodged in a relatively nonfatal area—the figure will easily be able to drive it directly into a vital organ. That means that if Sun-Gu fails to dodge cleanly on just one occasion, this fight will be over.
That’s another thing, too. Sun-Gu’s radius of attack is limited by the length of his own arm. But the figure can stand in one place and swing the weapon anywhere that the length of their arm, the long rod, the chain, all put together, can reach.
“If I had a little more patience, I might even have waited for you to get back to full health, so that this could be a more memorable fight,” the figure says.
Sun-Gu’s breath hitches. His opponent is not kind enough to pretend not to notice. They drive forward, intending to use the moment of temporary weakness to their benefit, just as Sun-Gu jerks forward with a forceful, “hHh’EEZschHH-uH!”
Sun-Gu evades, but only barely. How he is able to predict the trajectory of the metal ball, even distracted, even with his eyes closed, Yuna isn’t sure. But it’s clear that he isn’t done, and by the time his eyes are already falling shut for another. He’s afforded a sharp, desperate breath, before his shoulders jerk forward again. “hH’nGKt-! Hh… hh-IIIH’DZSshH!”
He coughs, after, as if the sneezes have somehow irritated his throat further.
The stranger grins. “...But I suppose having your head as a prize would be consolation enough.”
They sweep the chain in a wide arc, directly for Sun-Gu’s neck. Sun-Gu crouches for a moment, then takes a running leap up into the air, righting his trajectory with one foot to the wall to land behind them. He’s put his knife away, Yuna realizes. But there is nothing here—no props, no furniture—for him to repurpose into a weapon.
“Sorry,” Sun-Gu says. The expression on his face is not one of remorse. It’s one of clear, bitter irritation. He’s annoyed, she realizes. “You’re right. I’m not feeling my best today.”
It’s an admission, loud and clear, but the way he says it, it doesn’t sound like an admission of weakness. Up until now, he has been observing, Yuna realizes, as he’s done before—passively taking in the stranger’s fighting style, their handling of their weapon, their habits, their tells.
“So,” Sun-Gu says, flatly. When the stranger swings again, Sun-Gu snags hold of the chain while it’s in mid-air, and—as if it’s weightless—yanks the stranger towards him. He takes hold of the chain with his other hand, testing its weight. The smile on his face is utterly cold. “Let’s get this over with quickly.”
—
Afterwards, when they leave the warehouse, the sun is starting to rise. Yuna finds a text from Glory Club on her phone from an hour ago, presumably from the chairman. It’s curt: Do not proceed. We have reason to doubt the motives of the group which supplied the intel. Ironically, there was not enough reception underground for their warning to reach them in time, but she thinks that Sun-Gu must’ve realized much earlier.
Biggie and Junior are a little worse for the wear, but other than that, neither of them is concerningly injured. Biggie claims that he doesn’t have a concussion, but he doesn’t put up too much of a fight when Yuna insists that when they get back, their first stop will be to the medical ward to get fixed up.
Speaking of Sun-Gu: he is quiet, which is not unusual. Sun-Gu has never been the most talkative person, but Yuna suspects that today, there’s more to it.
“I can take us back,” Yuna says, trying not to make it sound pointed. It’s usually Sun-Gu who steers, but Yuna has enough experience with the St. Petrus V4 to handle a forty minute trip on paved roads, and enough experience too to know how to speed just enough to stay in control of it.
“It’s fine,” Sun-Gu says, flashing her a distracted smile. “It will be faster if I drive, because I won’t have to navigate.” He retrieves his own helmet from the seat compartment. Yuna spends a moment to watch him. He isn’t injured, nor does he look any less alert—he’d gotten out of the battle without so much as a scratch to show for.
But there are little hints, here and there, to exhaustion. The way he clears his throat before speaking, so quietly she can’t tell except for the slight bob of his throat, the slight furrow of his eyebrows. The way he pauses to clip his helmet, shielding his face with one hand from the gleam of the rising sun, as if his head is already hurting. The way he looks relieved to be sitting down, the way his hand lingers, a little shaky, on the motorcycle handles before he steadies it, looking faintly annoyed.
Of course, for someone like Sun-Gu, where—on the battlefield—any sort of slight miscalculation could be the difference between life and death, where trusting his body to function exactly as he’s used to is crucial for his success, Yuna isn’t surprised that any sort of bodily inefficiency would be an annoyance, even more so for Sun-Gu than for most.
At the same time, as she stares at him, she has to wonder—just how long has he been unwell? Had she not been awake during the battle—had she been unconscious, then, like the other two—would she even have noticed? How many times in his life has he been ill and just proceeded? Yuna doesn’t know what his relationship to Peter is—whether he’s a long lost cousin, or someone who trained under him before, or something else. But she knows, from the way he fights, that he must’ve had years of combat experience even before he joined Glory. No one is born with that amount of expertise, that level of near-inhuman intuition.
In the past, when Sun-Gu found himself in life-or-death situations, had he proceeded like he is now—as though everything were normal? As though any affliction he was suffering through privately was not even worth the attention of his own team? It makes sense, she thinks—that he wouldn’t broadcast any weakness openly, especially for any potential adversaries to listen in on. But if he’d been so careful to hide it from all of them, how would he take it if she acknowledged it out loud?
“Is something wrong?” Sun-Gu asks, watching her now.
“No, nothing at all!” Yuna says, quickly. Think, she tells herself. She returns his smile, a little sheepishly. “I was just thinking… I’m a little hungry. Do you think we could stop at a convenience store on the way back?”
Sun-Gu blinks, a little surprised. But then he nods. “Of course,” he says.
She fiddles with her own helmet until it’s securely on. Then she gets onto the motorcycle, behind him, and waits for him to take off.
—
True to his word, Sun-Gu stops at a 24/7 convenience store on the way back. But when Yuna asks him if he wants anything to eat, he waves her off with another smile. “Not enough time has passed after that fight,” he says. “I’m still too worked up to eat something.”
Bullshit, she thinks, but she steps inside the store nonetheless. Inside, it’s heavily air-conditioned, pleasantly cool. She picks out a sandwich from the fridge for herself, and one for Sun-Gu, while Biggie and Dokgo—who have followed them here on their scooters—load up on containers of cup ramen and ready-made hot fried chicken. Yuna snags a bottle of water from the fridge. Then she’s sure no one is looking, she takes a blister pack of aspirin off the shelves, along with a travel pack of tissues, and pays for it through the self-checkout station.
Biggie and Junior are still inside by the time she’s done shopping, so she heads outside, the plastic bag in hand.
She finds him still seated on the motorcycle, his helmet still on. He’s sitting ramrod-straight, his shoulders stiff, his head ducked slightly to avoid the sun. To anyone else, he might look alert—perhaps even nervous—but Yuna knows better. It looks as if he is doing everything in his power not to fall asleep.
His breath hitches. He gasps, his body jerking forward with a loud, “hHHD’TSHhh-Uh!”, which seems ridiculously unrelieving for how loud it is, and sighs, tenderly massaging the bridge of his temples. So the headache from earlier hasn’t gotten any better, then.
She watches him for a moment longer—watches him duck forward into his arm with another ticklish sneeze, and emerge with a liquid sniffle—and wonders when this had all started to feel like second nature.
Caring about him, that is.
When he hears her coming, he looks up to her. “Done with breakfast already?”
“Not yet,” she says. “But I got you a sandwich.
“Ah, thanks,” he says. “Though, didn’t I say—”
“You’re not hungry right now, I recall,” Yuna says. “You can save it for later. But I have something else for you too.”
She hands him the aspirin and the bottle of water. Sun-Gu stares down at them for a moment, his eyebrows furrowing.
“I am not injured,” he says, at last.
“I know,” Yuna says, casually. “The aspirin is for your headache. That’s been bothering you all morning, right? It might help with your fever, too, but I think the best antidote for that would be some proper bedrest.”
For a moment, Sun-Gu just stares at her, his eyes a little wide. Then he laughs. “You really don’t let anything past you, do you, Yuna?”
“That’s right,” she says, crossing her arms. “So you were trying to hide it.”
“Not exactly,” Sun-Gu says. “I just didn’t deem it worth mentioning.”
“Three to five days of bedrest, and lots of warm fluids!” Yuna says, jabbing a finger into his chest, accusingly. “That’s what people recommend for illnesses like this. Not a killer mission first thing in the morning!”
“You are very prudent,” Sun-Gu says, looking mildly amused.
“You don’t think it might’ve helped to mention your illness to someone you trust? The chairman, or even me?”
“I fail to see how that would’ve made any difference. It’s not as though the mission could have waited.”
“Fine, then.” Yuna says. “You might not agree to take it easy. But I’ll keep noticing as long as you keep being irresponsible.” She means it as a threat—that in the future, if he ever dares to be so reckless, she’ll be the first to notice. And if Yuna thinks he should be resting, instead of on a mission, she’s not going to keep her mouth shut about it.
But when she looks over at Sun-Gu, he is smiling.
#sneeze kink#snz kink#sneeze fic#sneezefic#snzfic#this was really fun to write 😭😭 though writing the action was certainly an experience#i love yu//na so much... half the fun was writing everything from her perspective and thinking abt what she might notice and how#this fic is influenced a lot by y//una and pet//er's dynamic in ep14; specifically his acknowledgment of her perceptiveness and#the covert act of kindness he shows her at the end#i am kind of scared this fic might only appeal to me because people aren't familiar w the fandom 😭 i was actually not intending to#write anything initially for that very reason. but then my d took the wheel#but this was a good break from my more serious writing (yvverse) and a fun character study in general; life has been really rough this week#and so it was nice to have an outlet#my fic
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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💜
Ahhhh Jen thank you for thinking of me 😭 Oh god, what do I choose?! Okay I'm gonna go in order of my top 5 personal favourites based on their storylines and how fun they were to write, so here goes...
Confessional ~ Copia x F Reader [3 Parts]
As a sister of sin, it was your duty to confess at least once a month, to have your sins praised by a higher up member of the clergy. But you only ever chose Thursday nights, when you knew he was on duty. And tonight, you were working up the courage to confess your darkest sin - the dreams you had been having...
Rituale Septem ~ Terzo x F Reader [8 Parts]
Your faith is shaking; 16 years at the Ministry, and what did you have to show for it? You'd never even heard the Dark One's voice like your Siblings... But what could you do? Well, you could ask the advice of the one person chosen to guide his flock through adversity; Papa Emeritus III. And he has an idea that might work...
The Mayor's Daughter ~ Mary Goore x F Reader [5 Parts, Ongoing]
Mary knew the entire town hated him; the metalhead with the freaky make up and fake blood dripping down his face. He was the local menace, the town vandal, the cliché trouble maker. He played up to that image, enjoyed the havoc and the chaos, revelled in it. He loved pissing people off. And so, what better revenge to get on his beloved town, than to fuck around with the Mayor's daughter…
In Cold Blood ~ Terzo x F Reader [One shot]
Solitude had always appealed. Perhaps that’s why you took on this project… The thought of transforming a dilapidated old Victorian farmhouse into a sanctuary of your own, to live in peace and the romanticisms of a gothic home you fell in love with. After the structural integrity of the house is replenished, you fill your days with DIY and decorating, bringing to life a house that had been frozen in time and left to rot for decades. You could enjoy the solitude of the land already, a few miles outside of a town plagued by disappearances and a fear of the dark. But you couldn’t escape the news of more missing people, nor the strange occurrences happening around your new home. Were you imagining things? Or was there indeed a shadow haunting your sanctuary?
Come Home to Me ~ Secondo x F Reader [One shot]
No one ever thought to question why Papa Emeritus II was such a bitter man. People assumed it was a product of his upbringing, of the pressures being an Emeritus brought him. But they had no idea that years ago, he was a completely different man. A man that you so easily fell in love with...
It was so hard to choose my favourites, everything I write is so special to me but these one just have the edge...
If you'd like to see what else I've written, I have a masterlist here! 💕
#ghost bc#the band ghost#ghost band#the band ghost fanfic#ghost#ask da rulah#ghost the band#mary goore x reader#mary goore#mary goore fanfic
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20 questions for fic writers
tagged by no one, stolen off the dash- the numbers are outrageous because i've been writing in fandom since 2009 🫠 here's my whole ao3 profile ("back catalogue") lol.
1. How many works do you have an AO3? 144
2. What's your total AO3 word count? 1,624,724
3. What fandoms do you write for? right now: 9-1-1 and bts
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? the cleverness of me (star trek, kirk/spock) an upbeat kind of dirge (star trek, amanda/sarek, kirk/spock) visit philadelphia (hamilton, hamilton/laurens) every day is a gift that's why they call it the present (hamilton, lots of pairings) you are cordially invited (star trek, kirk/spock)
5. Do you respond to comments? not... really... for a really stupid reason! which is that my hamilton fics (especially the first two) were some of the first posted on the ao3 and the comments blew up so much i couldn't catch up and never caught up. years later, i have 3100 unread comments but i read them all the time 🥹
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? the five year mission (star trek, kirk/spock). read the tags!!! though i kind of love the comments that are like "i didn't read the tags/warning and holy shit i should have."
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? i'm a sappy romcom bitch at heart, so most of them do. off the top of my head, the most recent: what are your intentions? (9-1-1, bucktommy) and out of the woods (into your arms) (bts, namseok). i think happiest is relative to the time/agonies it took to get there and these two warm the hell out of my heart.
8. Do you get hate on fics? no thankfully.
9. Do you write smut? When The Story Calls For It
10. Do you write crossovers? not opposed to them but i haven't come across an idea where it would work.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? not that i know of and let's keep it that way!!!!!
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? yes, mostly into russian and mandarin
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? yes!!!! but not in a long time, god knows how it would go these days because i might be more Exacting these days. or it would go great! driven outside and driven in (princess diaries 2, mia/nicholas) dexterity (star trek, amanda/sarek) 14. What's your all time favorite ship? honestly bucktommy is working its way up there because i love love love buck so much. SO MUCH. OUR SPECIAL BOY. but long term it's: kirk/spock (star trek, every version), nicke (nicklas backstrom)/ovi (alex ovechkin) (hockey rpf), and cory/shawn from boy meets world (I KNOW).
15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? i try not to post WIP's because i really avoid reading WIP's unless i trust the author. but there's one fest fic that i'm going to finish if it kills me: table for him and you and me (bts, rapline ot3). there's also an unposted bts star trek au that i haven't touched in two years that is my white whale that i have to finish one day, goddddddd
16. What are your writing strengths? dialogue, and it comes so easily, it comes first
17. What are your writing weaknesses? everything else, lol. describing people's appearances? if you don't have a visual reference, i am fucked. 18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i don't like when it's italicized. it feels too much like making it ~exotic, but that's my own very personal and subjective opinion i don't want to argue about. AND i did it in a recent fic, so. idk. 19. First fandom you wrote for? probably lord of the rings or harry potter in the pre-ao3 days, and all of them are lost to history/livejournal 20. Favorite fics you've written? a lot of hockey rpf ones, i don't know what was in the water but i love them still (all nicky/ovi, all archive locked) the arrival of 290287 backstrom the washington royals did you ever stop to love me
my three boy meets world/girl meets world fics (cory/shawn/topanga): it's just the rest of our lives for bts: my namseok regency au, the other 100k+ fic i've written. i love it and i don't think you need to be a bts fan/namseok shipper to read it. if you like regency stuff, agony, mutual pining, childhood sweethearts to estranged husbands to reconciliation: i think you'll love it! like the ocean needs the waves (bts, namseok, 121k) and recency bias is a thing but man i love my six precious bucktommy stories i've posted. especially what are your intentions? i have a lot of long comfort fics that i've read over the years that i love going back to over and over again, and yes i wrote it but this is one of them for me (and i hope it becomes one for other people)
passing this on to anyone who wants to think about their writing at 12:30 AM! but also @waldorph @rcmclachlan @cecilyv @dadvans @liminalmemories21 @geddyqueer
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thank you @therealsaintscully for tagging me !! i always love writing tag games asjdfajsdf
how many works do you have on ao3?
on naturechild, i have 8. on my older, multi-fandom account (jamestkirk) i have 13. thennnn i have 2 orphaned ones in the star wars fandom & then on an ancient one i abandoned in 2014 i have 21. and i know i orphaned at LEAST 3 others at some point. so that's... like 44?
what’s your total word count?
141,179 on naturechild, 139,838 on jamestkirk, and then i have no idea what the password for my old one is so idk there. but at least 281,017. even though i had 21 on that super old one, they were all really short, and the orphaned ones i have are only a few thousand each. so probably around like the 290-300k mark.
what are your top 5 fics by kudos?
and oh, my heart was flawed (aziraphale/crowley)
is it a great or little thing we fought? (han/luke)
i'm not trying to write a love song (steve/bucky)
and all i ever knew (only you) (aziraphale/crowley)
the star to every wandering bark (aziraphale/crowley) (abandoned)
do you respond to comments? why/why not?
i try to !! i certainly read them all. i tend to get overwhelmed easily by responding to people, like just in general, so like any inbox i have (email, text, tumblr, discord, etc) i have a ton i haven't replied to. but i try for the first few weeks after a fic drops at least fjsdfjasdf
what's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?
oh hm. well, i need you (never leave me alone) ends on an angsty note but there's the third installment planned where john survives getting shot and they wind up fine, so while the fic ends sad their arc isn't. so with that excluded, your midas touch (quentin/eliot) is probably the winner. it's just really angsty sex where they aren't together but they know they want to be together but eliot turned quentin down (like in canon for those of u who were wise enough to not watch the magicians) so it's just. smut and sadness.
what's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?
uuuuh hm i tend to write a lot of like mid-canon fics i guess or angst or like fics that finish off with a Hopeful tone but not happy or sad but i guess the one that i'd say is the happiest ending is probably i'm not trying to write a love song. it's a stucky fix-it fic bc i was so mad about endgame that i had to make myself not mad by writing this, but it's essentially just. 5 times bucky "jokingly" asked steve to marry him and one time steve actually asked him. i'm gonna be so real i do not remember the plot of this at all beyond that.
do you write crossovers?
not anymore, no! i wrote some waaay back in the day on deviantart- most notably i was kicking around a star trek/beatles crossover as a kid where spock, bones, kirk, and uhura swapped places w the beatles. i don't remember where i was going with it at all, but i wrote it in a notebook at summer camp lol
have you ever received hate on a fic?
yeah lmfao most recently i had someone tell me i was ableist for not tagging a 7k fic "slow-burn" bc they didn't get to anal sex right away. mind you, they were still fucking, there just wasn't anal. and this meant i was ableist. absolutely insane comment i still think about it like weekly.
do you write smut? If so, what kind?
yeahhhhh most of my fics on naturechild are explicit. and idk i'd say usually just Porn With Feelings like i love using smut as a way to explore characters and relationships rather than just straight up being hot. which is maybe my downfall but hey i'm having fun
have you ever had a fic stolen?
not that i'm aware of!
have you ever had a fic translated?
i don't think so? i think i've been asked a few times but no
have you ever co-written a fic before?
yeah! i co-wrote a beatles fic w a friend in middle school, i co-wrote the star to every wandering bark w my ex, and i'm writing i want you, need you, i love you with @forthlin. there's ALSO in the works a thing i'm co-writing w @dykebeatles at some point that exists in our minds and is very beautiful such a beautiful world
what's your all-time favorite ship?
i truly couldn't answer this w a gun to my head this changes frequently. but my ones that keep returning are: kirk/spock(/bones), (redacted star wars ship u could all figure out w the slightest sleuthing), charles/erik, and john/paul. and then i'm also huge into mulder/scully, twelve/clara, and doctor/master, but i don't tend to read or write fics for those i just witness them on my screen and go crazy.
what's a wip that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?
the star to every wandering bark will never get finished bc we broke up and then we were Planning on finishing it and he didn't get back to me lmaoooo. but also the universe for is it a great or little thing we fought? i thought was very neat and wanted to finish and then never got around to. given that it's literally 8 years old at this point i don't think i'm ever going to but i loved that little world!
what are your writing strengths?
i've been told i'm good at dialogue and i think i'm good at painting emotional pictures honestly !!
what are your writing weaknesses?
i get really bogged down sometimes and it's hard for me to know what to cut to make the action flow so it's not just chunks of rambling that take too long to move from one action/scene to the next. i'm trying to Actively work on this and get better though so ! i'm also not the strongest at smut bc again, i use it as a character study more than anything. trying to improve on that as well!
what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
like prev said, depends on how well it's done. i've seen it done really well and really poorly. regardless i definitely think you should probably try and find someone who speaks that language and not just use google translate bc oh boy.
what was the first fandom you wrote for?
fasdfasdf kim possible when i was 9...... first time i started taking fanfiction SERIOUSLY though was the beatles when i was 11
what's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?
ohhhh hm. i really wanna write a mcharrison fic but they're so bittersweet to me and idk if i could do them justice. i've also only ever written one cherik fic and that's criminal, i'd love to write another one
what's your favorite fic you've written?
okay i know it's recency bias but it's between cut to chord: subliminal flash of love-making like i don't think i've ever been as proud of a fic as that one, and then i want you (every time that you're near) was just so fun to write and so adfasdf i love them
tagging: yall don't have to do this but tagging some ppl i know have published fics and may not have been tagged ! @forthlin @wronglennon @dykebeatles @sgtpeppers and anyone else that would like to do this can say i tagged them <3
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Fic Writer 20 Questions
Thank you for the tag @hopefullyakotelife and @ninjababypowpow <3 love you muchos
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
17
2. What's your A03 word count?
33,786
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Star Wars the clone wars
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
The Promotion
Our deepest condolences
Just this once
A fox somewhere is hiding
Try again
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
I do because the least I can do is thank people who comments. But it's harder lately to find the energy so I take quite some time x'D
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angsties ending?
But we can't save you, hands down. It's the only one without any tidbit of hope at the end.
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Oh that's way harder... I'll say it's The Promotion
8. Do you get hate on fics?
I'm too small and too niche a writer to get hate. The worst I got was someone deeply confused and disappointed by Try again. Which really is fair as hell since I went heavy on the meta stuff and games with the fourth wall there.
9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?
I don't. Maybe one day I'll try but as of now I'm not particularly interested in it not do I know how I'll even write it.
10. Do you write cross overs? What's the craziest one you've written?
I don't but if I have a crossover idea one day, I'll absolutely go for it.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Nope
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Not really ?
14. What's your all time favorite ship?
I'm way too much of a multishipper to have an otp. I can be convinced for any and every ship with just a great fic or someone passionated enough about it. Even ships I wasn't particularly or at all interested in, or that I didn't even like at all at first. It happened many times already x'D
But lately I've been looking more for Fox/other clone(s). And my homemade rarepairs have a special place in my heart of course.
15. What's a WIP you'd like to finish but doubt you ever wilI?
My bigger, longer projets are going to be hard but I refuse to not finish them (even if I don't even have the first chapter finished for any of them TT^TT). So most likely Shebse batch real face. I think that one kinda burned on the back burner x'D if I get the motivation tho I would love to finish it.
16. What are your writing strengths?
I'm really bad at having an objective critical opinion on my skills but I really like how easily I can switch genres and writing styles.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Most likely passing. And well the longer the story, the harder it'll be to write for me, in general x'D that's when passing becomes difficult as well
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
Here for it, absolutely. It gives lots of depth to worldbuilding. But translation is a must.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Star Wars the clone wars xD
20. Favorite fic you've ever written?
Oh that's just evil. All of them are my babies !! But I'd say the Weaving like red strings series because it kinda became my comfort au to write in.
NPT : @cookiemonsterv3 @stardustloki @here-be-bec @ithillia @whiskygoldwings @rooksunday @mamuzzy-creates-stuff and @brokenphoenix99 if y'all want <3
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Twenty Fanfic Writer Questions
Tagged by @littleblackraincloudofcourse
Tagging @lowkeyed1 @evodevo-geekmonkey @dianels @bisexualshakespeare @spybrarian @blackdalek
1. How many works do you have on Ao3?
7 (3 are WiP)
2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?
186,452
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Willow! ...Technically other things too but really it's just Willow with playful skins.
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
Red Embers: dark alternate future AU, resistance fighters against the Wyrm's tyranny, grim & gritty
Like Constellations, a Million Years Away: sprawling mecha sci-fi AU set in the world of the Lancer tabletop roleplaying game. The Questies all pilot giant mechs; four books (2 done), one focused on each of Jade, Kit, Graydon, and Elora (in that order). Posthumanism, anticolonial to the extent a fanfic can be, utopian, dramatic.
Soft Blazing Crowns: Tanthamoretober one-shot. Modern AU. Elora helps Jade with a sexy photoshoot for a gift for Kit.
Full: (E-rated) Tanthamoretober one-shot. Modern AU. Straight-up smut drabble, 100 words on the dot. Extremely funny to me that this is in the top 5. :P
The Loving Hurt: Canon-set one-shot digging into the violence implied by the canon against the Bone Reavers, Scorpia's backstory, how Jade got her name. Dark, grim, not pleasant to write and in some ways probably not to read TBH. I was in A Mood!
5. Do you respond to comments?
Religiously! Sometimes it takes me a while, but I do.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Hmmm. I mean I think it's gotta be The Loving Hurt. Like I said. Dark. Blame the show's writers, I do. :P
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Gonna resist the temptation to say Full and instead say I think that it'll probably be Flawless Five vol. 1 when it's finished in a few weeks!
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Not so far!
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
The only thing I'd consider smut is Full. Otherwise, not anywhere that you can see. ;)
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
No true crossovers, though Like Constellations is set (loosely) in the Lancer Universe.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
I don't think so! They're too weird!
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
No but I'd be so honored.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Nope!
14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?
I am a Tanthamore diehard, what can I say.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
If you'd asked me recently I'd probably have said "all of them." Fortunately I'm feeling a little better lately! I hope to finish all of the current ones; Constellations is a slow, weighty project, F5 I hope to have done very shortly, Embers...we'll figure that out after F5.
16. What are your writing strengths?
I think I'm pretty good at dialogue, and I'm decent though not incredible at humor (especially character-based humor). I'm also a decent mimic - though this can feel a little clunky sometimes, I think I'm able to adjust my voice pretty easily to suit a situation, genre, or style. My unhinged and unpopular fic Excerpts from a new translation... is a pretty good example of that, lol. And on that note: I have a lot of fun with wacky metatextual stuff.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Taking the wacky meta stuff too far; not being bold enough in straying from the established character arcs/plots in canon; I don't think I'm great at writing really juicy interiority. Starting very large projects that will take forever to finish. ':)
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I'm comfortable enough in Spanish to write simple dialogue in that language. I've done one line in Latin (which I'm comfortable with since it's functionally a dead language) and made up some words in a conlang for Constellations. Wouldn't try anything via Google Translate though.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Willow! At least if we count conscious fanfiction. If we're going back to the Days of Yore probably Animorphs when I was a wee one.
20. Favourite fic you’ve written?
Difficult to pick...but Like Constellations is the baby, the one I'll finish come hell or high water (I hope). On the other hand, Flawless Five is probably the most fun (to write, and maybe to read if you like that sort of thing) and Red Embers is the one that in many ways I find most exciting. Like I said - hard to choose!
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fic writer twenty questions!!!
tagged by the lovely @timelesslords <33 (that's kind of alliteration if you think hard enough hehe) aka an incredible writer who i admire greatly (for which reason i'm linking her version of the post here) <3
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
28
2. What's your AO3 word count?
103,418
3. What fandoms do you write for?
very primarily percy jackson (i.e. pjo/hoo/toa) and the shadowhunter chronicles
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
1. Percy to the Rescue (69)
2. A Different Kind of Adventure (54)
3. Napkins and Notebooks (54)
4. Mistletoe (52)
5. The Holiday Market (51)
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
i do! it may take some time (if i get in my head about something lol) but i will always get to them if they elicit a response. i appreciate comments and the people who make them so incredibly much
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
probably Acceptance. it's <900 words but it's the only fic i have flagged with "main character death" so..
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
this is so hard.. prospecitvely i want to say it will be The Shape of the Tide just because of how much of a journey it will take to get us there. but as of right now it might be You, Me, and Nick just because of how damn cozy it is.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
i get a lot of "why would you do this" but so far *knocks on wood* no real hate.
9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?
yes. and i have no idea how to answer the second question.. um ig pretty straightforward explicit hetero smut? (so far.. if anything else i could def see myself writing sapphic smut in the future)
10. Do you write cross overs? What's the craziest one you've written?
i have written one (1) crossover. it was a percy jackson/harry potter next gen where the percabeth fam move to the uk and their son gets a letter from hogwarts. i was like 14/15 and gave up two chapters in because i couldn't figure out the conversion rates of american dollars to pounds to wizard money o7 (ftr i would totally write more. it can be so fun to play with characters like that and see how they interact etc.)
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
i am far to unknown for that lol
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
no sirr
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
no, but i would love to
14. What's your all time favorite ship?
es a tie between percabeth (pjo) and sizzy (tsc). (some might determine from observing my blog (or sideblog) that it's actually just sizzy. but (a) i love them in different ways, (b) i don't recieve asks about percabeth, and (c) the scarcity of sizzy fan-content makes my heart act out the economic principle of supply and demand lol)
15. What's a WIP you'd like to finish but doubt you ever wilI?
ivy.. i would love to see this story completed but unfortunately i no longer ship ghostwriter and even with reshaping the plot to change the endgame, i just don't feel like writing that much about jesse anymore.
16. What are your writing strengths?
i feel like i'm pretty okay at tackling complex emotions? i've also gotten comments on my imagery, voice, and characterizations.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
endings; it's the biggest critique i remember receiving in my college writing classes. i also feel like i have a tendency to get lost in the weeds sometimes, which results in too much narration. also just general confidence.. i get spooked really easily.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
it's fun if it's spanish! but so far that's the only other language i've written dialogue in.. (thank you, leo)
19. First fandom you wrote for?
i actually think it may have been ella enchanted ? it was back on figment.com when i was 13-14 and was for some sort of challenge and i thought like ooh i can connect this with ella! (i was prob in my reading and rereading the book era) but it was super short and barely connected lol
20. Favorite fic you've ever written?
gonna take a page out of lexi's book and split this between fandoms hehe
for tsc: Trying. i have found myself sitting at the top of my stairs ready to leave just rereading the first like 5k of this fic way too often. (it's also horribly the longest piece of writing i think i've ever finished. so it holds a special piece of proof to myself in it.. even if its only like 8k)
for pjo: Here Without You. there's an entire fraction of my soul tied up in this fic i swear. i'm never not thinking about it. it's been incredibly cathartic for me to write, both for myself and the characters (incl. calypso who i was not expecting to learn to appreciate/understand as much as i have)
leaving the tag open bc i can't think to save my life rn but! if you write fic and wish to do this, consider this your designated tag <3
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20 questions for fic writers
tagged by @mustlovesteve tysm!! i checked, and turns out i did this last november, too, so this will be a fun little comparison!
1. How many works do you have an AO3? 46!
2. What's your total AO3 word count? 512,645!!!!!
3. What fandoms do you write for?
main ones are dead boy detectives & stranger things (specifically steddie lbr) rn!
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
you looking at me, looking at you
run your fingers through my hair
you will never be unloved by me (you are too well tangled in my soul) -- i know this one is new!! dead boys ily.
eat me alive
when the party's over
5. Do you respond to comments?
yes! i try my very very best to respond to all of them, especially on newer fics. i usually fall behind on older fics/don't prioritize responding as much, but if there's one that is really kind/really touches me i always make a note to respond.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
i've written a lot of depressing shit for the merlin fandom. i think winter always turns to spring might be one of the saddest all around, though.
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
my hairdresser!steve fics are the happiest/fluffiest things i've ever written. but most of my fics have a happy ending! i think maybe memoria has one of the happiest tho?
8. Do you get hate on fics?
not really. i got One troll comment on a fic a few months ago that i just deleted and blocked lol.
9. Do you write smut?
every once in a while! i don't feel i'm very good at it, so it takes me a loooong time to write it when i do.
10. Do you write crossovers?
not in the traditional sense of combining fandoms, but if my btvs au counts as a crossover then yes?
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
not to my knowledge!
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
yes! winter always turns to spring was translated into portuguese!
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
no but i've thrown around the idea with friends before (pax....mona....if u see this....hiiiiiii)
14. What's your all time favorite ship?
this is such a rude question tbqh !!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm going to default back and say merthur, because they were the one and only and a constant in my life for so long. (steddie and payneland make me so fucking crazy tho)
15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
there is a steddie wip called "tightly hidden fists" i started in LITERALLY july 2022. it's still sitting in my google docs at 20k+ and i'm starting to doubt if i'll ever finish it. i keep considering signing up for a round of a steddie bang or something but i'm scared to do that to myself again lmfao.
16. What are your writing strengths?
i think i'm very good at dialogue, and getting The Voice of the character down. those things are usually what come to me first when i'm writing.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
for lack of a better word...filler? transitionary bits of fic. i overuse phrases/words like a madman, i also think i am a victim of trying to be too flowery when i can just, like, tone it the fuck down. are those weaknesses????
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
if it's easily translatable sentences (short and sweet, nothing too complicated) i put in the language in italics. (like, bonjour.) but frankly, i tend to avoid putting other languages in my fics. i don't often need to, and since i don't speak any language other than english i don't want to butcher anything if i can help it.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
probably the peter pan self insert i wrote many times between the ages of like 8-12.
20. Favorite fics you've written?
fields of gold mention. my love letter to bbcm. i'm also very proud of memoria, my 2023 steddie bang.
low pressure tags for @queerofthedagger @insane-ohwhyfandoms @wolfiery @babyseraphim
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20 Questions For Writers
This was sitting on my notifs for a few days and i finally took the time to do it. Thank my darling @takadasaiko for the tag!! 💕💕
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
I have 88 works in total, 31 of which are for Star Wars.
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
574,873 words.
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Currently, I'm only writing for Star Wars. But I used to write for Arrow and Supergirl, and ASoIAF, Dark-Hunters and Chronicles of Nick are in standby. I'm waiting for right motivation to come back to any of the last 3.
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
I'm only talking about Star Wars fics here...
Kadala (The Mandalorian) [and 4th place in most kudos of all my works]
Rough Awakening (The Bad Batch) [and 5th place in most kudos of all my works]
Welcome to Yavin IV (Rebels)
An Explosive Situation (Rebels)
Rescue on Ryloth (The Bad Batch)
And the the rest of my all-time fics with most kudos are
Take Your Breath Away (Arrow)
Undisclosed Desires (Arrow)
Made For You (ASoIaF/Game of Thrones)
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
I try my best, but sometimes I forget, and then it's been weeks and months since I got the comments that I'm embarrassed to reply them after so long. Even though, I think it's important that a writer let the reader/commenter that they appreciate it, even if it's with a simple "thank you" or an emoji. I know I'm being a hypocrite here since I fail to do what I preach, but it doesn't make it less true.
6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I think that would be Drifting, because it's kind of open ending, left to be interpreted, so it could end however the reader wants. Although, I left an author's note at the end saying what's my preferred ending, which always will be inclined to the happy side.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
High Above the Ground because is the happy ending i want for Commander Fox and Riyo Chuchi. They deserve only the best!
8. Do you get hate on your fic?
No, not really. I've gotten only 1 stupid message of someone criticizing a fic, but that was years ago when I still posted on FF dot net. The joke was on the reader because I moderated all the comments there so I just deleted it and nobody saw it but me. Honestly, I just laughed about it cuz their argument was just stupid.
9. Do you write smut?
I do, all kinds -from the most tame thing to the most perverted. But I used to wrote way more in my old fandoms, especially for Arrow. I think for Star Wars I've written just 1 or 2 smutty fics, and tamed at that.
10. Do you write crossovers?
I've tried a couple of occasions but never finished them. I'm not opposed to them obviously, but I do think the combination of fandoms has to be just right to work. Or at least, when it's me doing the writing.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Yes! Many, many years ago in the first fandom I ever wrote for. It was awful and hated it! You see, this was in the stone age of the internet when fandom specific sites abounded and not everyone had an account on FFnet yet (and Ao3 was not even a dream). The site I published on was split in 2 sections because the ships war in the fandom was bloody and ruthless, so to avoid the slaughter, I kept myself in my preferred side. But one day, a friend who read fic on both sides told me that someone stole my fics. Avoiding to get caught, the person who did it published them under a pen name that was almost exact to mine, she only added a period at the end, which could easily go unnoticed. Oh, and she interchanged characters names so it'd fit the other ship.
At first, my friend thought I had posted them but she knew I'd never write for that ship, like ever. In the end, it turned out that I wasn't the only one who had being plagiarized. Several people ON BOTH SIDES were. Thankfully, the person was caught and banned, but we almost burned the site down because of the whole shitshow.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
By me, yes, several. All into Spanish (my mother tongue). By others, not that I know of.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic?
Yes! A couple of times for different fandoms, and I loved it. I hope I'll do it again. The thing is that you need to find the right partner for it, or it can be a nightmare.
14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?
I don't appreciate this question, let me tell you. It's hard to choose. But I think I have to go with Olicity. I love them still (even if the show ending ruined it for me). Close second would be Braime (and I'm glad that there's still hope for them on the books, because as usual the show fucked them so but sooooo bad)
And as Star Wars specific, I don't think anyone will be surprised if I say it's Kalluzeb, right 🤣 They're my babies and I adore them!
15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Anything for Arrow or Supergirl. I sworn off those fandoms after their respectively awful endings.
No promises, but there's still hope for all if my unfinished works for Star Wars 😅
16. What’s your writing strengths?
Coming up with ideas. So, so many ideas. All the time and I want to write them all.
17. What’s your writing weaknesses?
Finishing writing the above-mentioned ideas. I tend to splay myself too much when I'm writing, and it takes me forever to get to the portion I really want to write (usually the idea that sparked the whole writing process) and I lose steam. That's why I have so many unfinished WIPs. I wish they'd write themselves.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
It's ok if used sparingly. A word here, a phrase over there is fine, but if a wall of dialogue that the reader needs to scroll down to the notes or click on a tooltip to find out the meaning it's the worst!!! A better solution for a writer that really needs/wants to have a whole conversation in another language for plot reasons or whatever, then all they need to do is to say once that the characters are talking in the other language and put the dialogue in the same language they've been writing the rest of the narrative and in italic.
The characters who don't speak the language won't understand what's being said, but the reader will and their reading will be more pleasant and fluid.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
An Argentinian show called Floricienta. A modern retelling of Cinderella.
20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?
I don't like this question either! All my fics are my babies! How do you want me to choose?!! There are so many I'm proud of. I guess I'll point the most recent one: Feed Me Poison, Fill me till I Drown I really like how this story is coming along. It's not done yet (what else is new? 😅) but what's coming is so so good!
Tagging (no pressure): @renee561 @thecoffeelorian @genericficerblog @airlockfailure @mistr3ssquickly @insertmeaningfulusername @fanfictasia
#20 asks for writers#ask game#the mandalorian#the bad batch#sw rebels#kalluzeb#braime#foxiyo#mare writes star wars#and other things#olicity#long post
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Writing Interview Tag Game
My internet is finally back! Thank you to @nyx-knox for the tag. It's a long one, so buckle the fuck up y'all.
When did you start writing?
I'm the child of two English majors and I wrote little stories in my journals as a kid, probably as young as five or six. I started writing fanfiction specifically when I was about 15 and wrote Ed Sheeran smut and putting it on tumblr, which I absolutely should not have been doing for internet safety reasons but what's done is done and tbh it was some solid writing. I then stopped writing for an entire decade due to mental health issues. I started writing my Falling Star fic in...April, probably? So between that and my WIPs, I went a decade without writing and then suddenly pumped out a couple hundred thousand words in less than six months. Go big or go home I guess!
Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?
Honestly, not really. I'm a slut for spawn Astarion smut what can I say.
Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?
There are none I can remember ever being compared to, but there are lots of other fic writers that I try to learn a little from each time I read their work.
Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?
I still live at home, so my writing space is at my gaming PC at the desk in my bedroom. The entire place is a huge mess and tbh it stresses me out a little but I have a lot going on right now so it is what it is. There's usually coffee and/or weed within arm's reach when I'm writing.
What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?
Something that's really surprised me in my return to creative writing is how easily inspiration has continued coming to me. Sometimes I worry that I'll lose it, but I keep having more ideas than I can get onto paper, and I've just barely begun exploring writing characters other than Astarion and Wynlana, so I think I'll have enough inspiration to continue writing for a very long time.
Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?
Smut! So much of it! And it doesn't surprise me in the slightest because I am a terrible, horny little goblin bastard.
What is your reason for writing?
I love my job (I work in early childhood education), but I realized it was at the point where it was taking over my entire life. I went on medical leave after having top surgery, and I decided to spend a lot of the time writing. Having a creative outlet has been very good for me, and the added motivation of people actually liking it has been a huge confidence boost.
Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?
One of the first comments I got was complimenting my prose and how everything flowed and I think about it nearly every time I write. Those had been some of my biggest concerns that delayed me posting the first few chapters of the fic, so that comment really meant a lot.
How do you want to be thought about by your readers?
I'd never really thought much about this tbh. I think a lot about how my writing will be perceived, but not so much about how I as a writer might be perceived. I care way too much about what people think of me irl so it's a nice break tbh
What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?
I'm a stubborn bitch which means I'll keep rewriting and reworking a scene until I'm truly proud of it. There have been scenes I've had to change significantly or cut for various reasons, but not many I've scrapped entirely. I'm very persistant.
How do you feel about your own writing?
Honestly, pretty confident! I thoroughly enjoy re-reading what I've written, and all of the feedback I've gotten so far has been positive. It's been a boost to my irl mental health to have something I both enjoy and am good at outside of work, and it's nice for it to be something lower stakes than "keeping 5+ toddlers at a time from trying to kill themselves in the most creative ways possible". I love them, but it's a lot of pressure!
When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely for yourself, or a mix of both?
Everything I write is something I've decided I might enjoy writing, but sometimes I write something and get really excited knowing my readers are going to love it. The other day I was editing an emotional scene and couldn't wait to show my beta reader because I knew she was going to love it.
No-pressure tags (sorry if any of you have done it already and I just didn't see lol): @bardic-inspo @pinkberrytea @locallegume @marlowethebard @kimberbohwrites
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