#dude they mean so much to me i feel insane actually just put me down

[javierduffy]

insane delusional breakdown of a scene i recently realized both of them were in (ive been making edits of them on tiktok (my @ is duffscuella feel free to follow) and noticed they were next to each other and it caused me to have some sort of episode)

strauss is between them sequentially but i think they intentionally got close to each other so that they could ensure the other’s safety. obviously they have to be a bit more subtle for the sake of not outing themselves to everyone else, particularly the pinkertons because if they find out that one is markedly valuable to the other, they’ll try to use that to leverage information/surrender/etc out of the other if they ever get the chance, but they still went out of their way to have the other in their close vicinity. the way that javier immediately checks on kieran specifically is so sweet to me 💔 they are in love, your honor

[madlori]

On Tommy Kinard

"It's not that I don't like Buck and Tommy, it's just happening so fast, he's underdeveloped!"

*clears throat*

Here is a recap of what we know about Tommy. And this is just off the top of my head, I didn't rewatch anything.

He was closeted at the 118 before and found the atmosphere repressive. He (probably) acted like a dick to fit in. When presented with the chance to make things better, he took it, and developed positive relationships with Hen, Chim and Bobby.

He was in the army and trained there as a pilot.

He knows Muay Thai and has a set up in his house.

He likes to work on cars and has a lift at his house (where TF does he live is my question - he has some nerve being agog at Buck's loft if he has a muay thai gym and a car lift)

He is down for violating departmental policy at the drop of a hat (has done so on at least two occasions) to help a friend and has no problems fucking with the fire chief.

He is a nerd. He likes pub trivia and has incorrect Star Wars opinions, and can keep up with Chim in the movie-quoting department.

His favorite movie is "Love, Actually" and he likes craft beer and monster trucks.

He came out when he transferred to Harbor and felt comfortable enough to stop lying about who he was.

He follows MMA and has friends in Vegas who like him well enough to hook him up to a frankly insane degree.

He'll risk his own life and engage in helicopter skulduggery to save people he doesn't know...I mean, apart from doing that for a living.

He'll take time out of his day to give a tour to the cute boy who called him up and offer to give that boy flying lessons (a significant time investment) which was probably maybe about more one on one time with said boy.

He yearns for the belonging and found family that the 118 became after his departure and probably befriended Eddie hoping to earn a plate at the cookout, aside from just clicking with him.

He likes Eddie and Chris a lot and they like him. Chimney also likes him.

He was attracted to Buck right away and was emotionally aware enough to pick up on Buck's jealous feelings over Eddie and his friendship, even if he was surprised that it was him Buck wanted to get to know.

He respects and values Buck and Eddie's friendship and wanted to make sure Buck knew that.

He's brave enough to shoot his shot by planting one on a dude.

He's a lil bitchy but also generous and ready to throw in with this insane guy who's inviting him to a family wedding after 0.5 dates.

He showed up to a bachelor party when he was on call because Buck asked him to, then showed up in turnouts after fighting a fire for like 12 hours yadda yadda we all know this part.

He has got it BAD for one Evan Buckley, who he only calls "Evan" which according to LFJR is a conscious decision by the writers, which fascinates me.

He was willing to take a chance with a man just discovering his sexuality BUT wasn't willing to put himself through that if the man in question wasn't ready for it. When Buck showed him that he was, he was all in.

He does NOT take his coffee like that.

Oh and

He's a beast.

This is VASTLY more information than we knew about ANY of Buck's previous girlfriends with the possible exception of Abby. Even Taylor did not get this much development over 20 episodes (things we knew about her: she was an ambitious and ethically flexible reporter, did not eat fudge, had a dad in jail, and sometimes jogged for exercise, she was capable of being nice and did love Buck, I believe). And as for it being fast? Sometimes it just be like that? A relationship doesn't have to have year(s) of buildup. Sometimes people do just meet, like each other, and start dating, in fact in the real world that's usually what happens. It's in TV Land that you have to have eighteen seasons of UST before pulling the trigger. Most of the time in reality people just vibe off each other and decide to go out and THEN they learn about each other.

And they've got a great start. You'd think they'd barely spoken by how a few naysayers are talking about it - the loft scene was like a solid five minutes of very open conversation, the Cringe Date seemed to have gone well and again, open and honest (if cringey) conversation before Cockblocker Eddie showed up, and the coffee meetup was again....open and honest conversation. They're not gonna show us long scenes of them exchanging firefighting stories and workout preferences (I mean, I'd watch that, but it's not what the show is about).

In conclusion, anyone saying he's poorly developed or the relationship is "out of nowhere" either is being willfully obtuse or has ridiculously unrealistic expectations for relationships and/or what constitutes character development.

As for whether they have chemistry, that's a matter of subjective opinion. Given that a TON of people watched that harbor tour scene (even when it was posted as a sneak peek) and started going "wait...what's going on here...are they flirting??" might be a clue. People were talking about Bi!Buck maybe happening with Tommy based solely off that clip of the harbor tour and what they were seeing between them. And imho that loft scene was crackling. But we all see things through the lenses of our biases, myself included.

Got that off my chest, whew.

[screamlet]

i wish you would write an outtake from what are your intentions where tommy tries to explain that he was sooooo confused by eddie and buck and eddieandbuck at first and it made him feel insane

(for the "i wish you would write" game)

i miss these boys! but here's something that could have happened in what are your intentions? this would probably be set during chapter 11. you don't have to have read the story for it to make sense.

notes: established relationship bucktommy; tommy pov complete; 1.4k; rated cute for cute

read on the ao3 with the rest of the story!

---

It happens once in a while, that their days off are on an actual weekend, and those feel weirdly special to Tommy. He's participating in something… normal: it's 9 AM and he's lying in bed with his boyfriend, their limbs tangled into some mess that's not spooning as much as thrown in the cutlery drawer. Evan's legs are so long and they like to wind around Tommy's like a pair of vines; every shift that tightens makes him laugh. Their hands are linked on top of the covers and they've got nowhere to be. This is as close to perfect as life can get. 

So of course, his brain thinks of Eddie. 

It seems wild now, about six months into their relationship, that Tommy ever thought Eddie and Evan had something going on, because they're just… Eddie-and-Evan. Once Evan kissed him that first time, it felt like that question was answered and that door was shut. But that kiss was so… 

"Can I ask you something weird?"

"You promise?" Evan asks.

"Promise what?"

"That it'll be weird."

Tommy bites his shoulder. "Now your expectations are too high, so kick them back down a little, huh?" Evan shrugs and pushes back against Tommy's chest. "That time with the basketball game, when you messed up Eddie's ankle, and I came to talk to you after—"

"You mean our first kiss," Evan croons, dripping with sap and affection. 

"Yeah, yeah, I guess." Tommy kisses his shoulder like he's making a point. "Actually, even before that, when I was hanging out with Eddie but not you, I kept thinking: did you guys ever…"

"Ever…"

Tommy takes their joined hands and pats Evan's dick through the covers. Evan bursts out laughing.

"What? That's how you ask?"

"I'm trying to deflect from the fact that it's a dumb question!"

Evan glances over his shoulder. "You think it's dumb?"

Tommy makes a face and makes sure he can see it. "Yeah, now I do, but when I first met Eddie and I didn't know you, I wondered if the two of you…"

Evan shakes his head. "No. It's Eddie."

"He's a good-looking guy and you really were a dense-as-hell bisexual if it never occurred to you. Seriously? No guy crush or drunken—"

"It's Eddie."

"Yeah, exactly! You guys are joined at the hip and when it was just me and him—"

"Joined at the hip, not joined at the dick. It's Eddie." Evan's quiet for a second, like he's thinking. "I think Chim or Hen made fun of me when he first joined because I was really jealous of him and how cool he was, and he'd been in the army. Then on one of our first shifts, we extracted a live grenade that a dude had in his thigh? And—"

"You what."

"Okay, maybe now it sounds like how I acted when I first met you, less jealousy and more acting like an idiot, but—"

"No, the live grenade. It was where?"

Evan turns around. "It was in a dude's thigh. It was a collectible, but then it turned out it was a live round inside."

"And you survived?"

"We did! Eddie was so cool. He extracted it, right, and put it in one of those black boxes. The guy had a ton of blood loss so we got him out, got out of the ambulance, and then when the bomb squad sent in their robot, the whole ambulance blew up. And then that was it. Jealousy over, we were friends." Evan turns his head again. "Did you think we were together or something?"

"Hold on, I'm processing the live grenade thing. It blew up an ambulance. What the hell is your life?"

"Not the weirdest thing that ever happened to me."

"I'm so, so aware of that."

Evan nudges his elbow into Tommy's stomach. "What'd you think of me and Eddie?"

"So… you've gotta remember, okay? I walk around the world with a pair of big gay goggles that are invisibly welded to my head and they never come off, so… I was hanging out with Eddie and he was always talking about you! Always saying how much he loved you, you were his best friend, Christopher loved you, telling me you were so lovable, you were just the best guy in the world, and then Chris couldn't stop talking about you and he loved you so, you know."

"Huh."

Tommy unwraps himself from Evan's legs and sits up on his heels. "But that's the thing, he was so straight about it and—I can't explain it! All these gay things were coming out of his mouth, but all the vibes were like, even when I'm peeing I actively try not to think about my dick too much. I didn't get it. I still don't! And then Lucy compared you guys to the raptors in Jurassic Park, and how he was the bait but you were the clever girl about to jump me."

Evan laughs and tilts his head on the pillow, looking coy. "Really? I don't even know what that means."

"It made sense when I was insane, and I was completely insane. I wasn't even jealous, just confused!" Tommy huffs. "Confused and seriously horny when I got to your place to talk, but I didn't know!"

"Did you have to know?" Evan asks.

It rushes out of Tommy before he has time to think about it: "I mean, yeah. You two are pretty big guys, like, you could still punch me in the face if I read you wrong and hit on you. Not that you would, either of you, but." Evan reaches for his hand and Tommy half-smiles. "The gay goggles, right? They do more than set off awooga sirens when a hot guy walks by. You've gotta be sure about that stuff."

"Is that why you didn't call me?" Evan asks. "About getting a beer after we met up at Harbor and you abandoned me for Eddie?"

"Well. Yeah, kinda. I figured if this straight guy wants to hang out again, we'll hang out again. But if I ask you out—"

"You could have asked, though. Hanging out, just friends?"

Tommy takes a deep breath. "Even then, I think I knew I couldn't ask you out like that. Platonically. So I wanted to be sure. And you kept looking at me like you didn't want to be "just" friends, so—" Tommy groans and shifts around again so he's sitting cross legged on the bed. "Do you see what I mean? You drive me insane."

Evan reaches out and touches his chin, thumb in his cleft. "I love you. You're really sweet and completely insane."

"Obviously I'm fine now. Don't give me that look." 

Evan drags him back down to the bed. He tangles his legs with Tommy's again. This time they're facing each other, the better for Evan to wrap his arms around Tommy's back and kiss him, ensnare him forever. "Was that weird enough for you?" Tommy asks between kisses. 

"Getting there, but I've got a high tolerance," Evan says with a grin. "It's funny, though, you say those things—lots of people have said that about me and Eddie—but, I don't know. Literally never a thought in my head. Even when I used to go out with him and Chris and people would act like I'm also Chris's dad, I'd feel like: hey, they think I'm a dad, that's so cool. Not the Eddie part."

"So that's no to Eddie, yes to baby, got it." 

They freeze, suddenly, because that's—not a thing they've talked about—and maybe it's way too early to talk about—

"Can I ask you something really scary?" Evan asks quietly. "Can we put that question in a black box for a little bit and check it out later?"

"Leave it for when we've got our tactical gear and a bomb robot? Yeah, absolutely. I haven't even had coffee."

"We haven't even had coffee," Evan whines. "Let's go have coffee."

"Hey." Tommy holds him closer and kisses him. "I'll wait, okay? No rush."

Evan stares at him and nods slowly. "Yeah." When he kisses Tommy again, it's sure, not scared or worried. Confident, again. "We're not going anywhere." Tommy agrees, kisses him again, and stays. He loves him and he stays. 

---

read on the ao3 with the rest of the story!

[tgcg]

this is my element (+ album)

asking me to pick my fave album is like asking an orphan matron to pick her favorite baby boy

thats some weird and cruel circumstances to put upon me i feel like it changes every damn week like a rota

i mean what if my beats misbehave and i gotta put 'em in time out i cant play permanent on that theyre too cute

but yknow what i can show you one thing thats been on my mind lately

===

so when i was a kid we had this skateboard vid by "element skateboards" on DVD

they were this skateboard kit slash apparel company that was all about progressivism and shit and they did these much lauded comp tapes of dudes riding around on their boards and doing the dopest of macho tricks on the shit

flipping it turnways

putting the rock in the house like a big man

we had some of their merch actually

===

so anyways the one we had back then was This Is My Element

released 2007

mostly clips from cali i think and i mean the camerawork is fucking insane on some of those shots

this is gonna sound lame as fuck but i prob spent so many cumulative hours just peelin through the footage and ogling the shit outta it

that framing was tight

===

so you may be asking yourself or me

dave you genuine dicksucker i asked about your fav album not your favorite sordid ass display of smooth dudes hardcore riding and grinding them boards in public dude you have a problem

ok well that wasnt a question first of all so jot that down

but anyways to THAT i say

listen to the music

the whole thing has an original soundtrack of ambient beats

got some abstract hip hop jams, got some more indie stuff, lots of acoustic sampling

HELLA underground

and basically every track minus one is done by sampler beast david p. madson AKA "odd nosdam"

dude is my hero seriously

he is the master of the beat machine i shit you not hes always been kinda my idol on this stuff

aside from bro obviously

===

obviously.

===

anyways he had an E-mu SP-1200 which is a really oldschool sampler invented by dave rossum in the late 80s

revolutionary to the hip hop scene

nosdam had this mega distinct sound to his music that i always wanted to replicate on my own beats

still do

i dont know for sure if he used it on T.I.M.E. but he uses some of the same samples from "vol. 9" which was exclusively SP-1200 so im gonna get a lil j’accuzi on that

it couldve been a boss dr sampler SP-202 though idk

he had one of those

===

so aside from beating the shit out of the pause/resume button to flip my whole cranium at the cinematography or whatever i would also kinda play it on loop to listen to the soundtrack and space out at 2am

the lonely broner seemed to free his mind at night

ok shit broner is good but i didnt mean it like that

that was goofy lets just keep movin

it was the only way i had to listen to it back then but i mean the video is 50 mins long so its basically just an odd nosdam album with accompanying ambient skater sounds and random expletives and whatever

random car sequence

yknow what i dont think people respect enough?

the dude who catches all the "mad stunts yo" on camera

i swear to god at least half the time hes ALSO on a board and that shit is bananas to me

bros gotta be on some whole other level of zen to skate good AND catch all them glamor shots of his fellow skater

thats like an express ticket to the ER imo

the ambulance is already on the scene watching you like an eager crow watches a half dead dog

===

ok gonna go ahead and lay it out flat

not great on a board myself

kinda dogshit at it actually

so maybe im not exactly an arbitrator of skateboard heinousness

but i always kinda liked watching THEM do it i mean who doesnt?

whats an even crazier layer to stack on the "dave" cake is

and dirk told me this because unfortunately it kinda happened post-2009

he would do all these collabs with one of my childhood favorite underground rappers david cohn aka serengeti

surrounded by daves left and right dude even before all the time travel horseshit

thats like

serendipitous as fuck i think!

===

if sburb was just a revolving door of artists called dave that i could bump fists with

instead of other mes in various states of aliveness tending toward extremely dead

i wouldve probably given it something higher than 2 stars on my TGN review

===

so yeah you ask me my favorite album its T.I.M.E. by odd nosdam i guess

bump that shit on a walk your mind will go places unknown to man

[sirxaibs]

Keigo Takami / Hawks X Reader (eventually various X reader but that’s if I decide to continue with the burst of inspiration)

If this isn’t that meaty for you…. THEY JUST MET LET THEM COOK

Summary: Small light banter for a first meeting between freshly debuted Hawks and an Isekai’d reader.

Basically after reading copious amounts of amazingly talented stories by amazingly talented writers. “DEPOLLUTE ME, GENTLE ANGEL” by @fallen-w1ngs and Changing History by SummerBlack on Quotev. With “depollute me” the author humanizes the pro hero from being just a symbol. Meanwhile with “Changing History” the author introduces an emotion more attuned to feeling real and how life isn’t just a cycle that is predetermined. So my dynamic of choice was you as the reader have already been thrown in this world for the first 18 years of your life. If you were put in this world why not do the expected? Become a hero. But if all things are fake why take anything seriously?

If you couldn’t gather from that, the reader and hawks will grow and learn that they have the ability to matter and deserve to feel like they belong. I don’t have a very serious style of writing but I do try! Maybe not my best but key emphasis on try! Today we delve into YOU! YOUR CHARACTER!

This was all made on my notes app while on vacation 😺

Word count: 4280 ish, (idk through editing I added some things)

A blur of red and gold emerged first, feathers catching the sunlight just before their owner stepped forward with an easy, lopsided grin. Hawks, the newly minted Pro, looked entirely unbothered by the attention, despite the sudden chorus of excited shouts.

“Hawks! Can you sign this?”

“Dude, your debut fight was insane!”

“Picture, please?”

He laughed, ruffling his windswept hair as he glanced over the eager faces.

“Man, you guys really know how to make a guy feel welcome,” he said, grabbing the nearest pen. “Alright, line up nice and neat, yeah? I’ve got places to be, but I can’t just leave my awesome fans hanging.”

As he signed posters, notebooks, and even the occasional wing-shaped keychain, Hawks kept that signature smirk in place. He’d always known he’d make it this far—but seeing the real, tangible proof of it in the form of starstruck faces and excited voices?

Yeah, this was pretty damn cool.

As the crowd died down, Originally just going to walk away you thought about when would even be the next time you’d see him. Unfortunately since being thrown into this world, the whole concept of canon magnets for main characters was not even a concept in your life.

“You know, if you’re acting like this right out of the gate, I can’t even imagine how inflated your ego will get once you’re officially ranked among the top heroes.”

“Sorry, sweetheart, but I have no idea where you’re getting that impression.” You almost felt bad for taking away his moment. The disheveled blonde looked like he might’ve been having a sincere, heartfelt moment.

“It’s always the pretty boys with the massive egos,” you sighed dramatically, looking away. Seeing Hawks in all his glory had to come with a little entertainment, right?

He took a step back, eyeing your UA uniform as if sizing you up.

“Maybe the hostility’s coming from jealousy?”

“It’s the Icarus trope for me” you mutter

“Sorry?”

You laughed lightly, rolling your eyes. “Oh nothing! You sure would think that.”

To be honest, you hadn’t meant to bump into him. You were just on your way home from school, with nothing more in mind than a nice nap. Being a third-year at UA in the most boring era of this universe really didn’t leave you with much to look forward to.

“I mean, looks like we’re heading in the same direction,” he said, curiosity creeping into his tone as he took another sip from his drink.

“You’re not wrong, but the flashy vibe you’re giving off? It’s almost alarming.”

He gave you a distraught look.

“Imagine this, I’m getting saved by—wait, what’s your name again?” Oh, it wouldn’t be impossible for actually knowing him. Sure, he had only debuted a few months ago and the crowd that just left that chanted his name every two seconds would be a sign for his name, but you couldn’t help it. In your past life, the sheer amount of content of the show you consumed meant you had to know him but better safe than sorry.

“Hawks,” he replied, deadpan, amusement flickering in his eyes.

You couldn’t help but chuckle. In response he raised his brow

It probably looked like you were laughing at him, which, in a way, you kind of were. You remembered the draft photos of when his character was first being developed—back when they considered giving him an actual hawk head. The thought alone made you smile.

“Pro hero Hawks saves me, and the sheer massiveness of his ego completely blindsides me. I’m struck by how conventionally hot he is, and then I die in your arms. Yeah, not a good look for you.”

You sighed inwardly. All in all, you were probably born in the worst generation in the My Hero universe. You couldn’t even be part of the middle generation where you could’ve had the chance to work as a teacher with Aizawa and the rest of the crew. It was a possibility, sure, but it felt so far out of reach. And the idea of being around Present Mic—preferably with his hair down and you age-appropriate for him? That would’ve been a dream.

But here you were, a few years older than the main cast. Actually, you were the same age as Keigo. As much as you loved his character, he didn’t really become important until the fifth season. Which meant you had little to no relevance to the plot or any of the major characters. You couldn’t help but feel like you were stuck in some lame generation, unable to make an impact.

Why couldn’t any isekai story go right? You really felt like you’d lost the genetic lottery over and over again. You couldn’t have been born just a few years younger, so you could’ve at least had the chance to be around your other favorite sunshine-blonde character, Mirio. Not being his age had probably made you feel like you’d lost years of your life unknowingly.

“Maamaa, we just met, and you’ve already got a grudge against me?” He teased, giving you a playful frown.

Immediately it springs in your head that you’ve probably come off as a total asshole. Screw the curse of having an outside point of view. The fact of knowing none of this was real maybe gave a bad look on the outside.

You suddenly felt a wave of regret hit you, realizing how your words had come across. His playful tone, the teasing frown—everything made it clear he wasn’t offended, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that you had crossed a line. You opened your mouth, but your thoughts were tangled, and it took a moment to collect your words.

“Ah, look, I—” You hesitated, eyes darting away, feeling heat rising in your cheeks. “I didn’t mean to sound like that. It’s just… I don’t know, sometimes I get carried away, and—” You mentally cursed yourself for being so awkward. You hated how easily you could go from sarcastic to genuinely sorry in a second.

Hawks gave you an odd look, the smirk still there, though softer. “Hey, no worries. I get it.” He shrugged, as if it wasn’t a big deal, but you could tell something about his tone had changed slightly. Maybe he was trying to lighten the mood too, like you were.

“No, I’m serious,” you quickly added, glancing up at him, feeling the need to apologize properly. “It’s just… I don’t know. I’ve been here long enough to see how people get caught up in all the… hero stuff. And I didn’t want to be another person acting all starry-eyed over you just because you’re a pro hero, you know?” God you sounded pathetic. Maybe if you prayed to all might really hard it would go away.

Hawks studied you for a second, then nodded slowly, his expression unreadable for a moment. “I get it. You don’t want to be one of those people who just worship the ground we fly on, huh?”

You sighed, relieved that he understood, but still uneasy. “Yeah... fly on. It’s just… this world, this universe… It’s all so… strange. I mean, I know you’re a big deal, and I respect that. But sometimes it’s hard to take things seriously when everything feels like it’s set in stone. To be so ‘MUCH’ all the time. Anyways I’m literally doing exactly what yours doing for a career so don’t take my words to heart. Heroes are kind of just people that help people and I’m like one or those people and by no means-” You paused, biting your lip.

There was an odd moment of silence before Hawks chuckled, and for a moment, you thought you might’ve said something ridiculous.

“You’re fine.” His tone was soft, genuine this time, as he took another step back, giving you space. “You’re not the first person to think I’m all ‘ego and feathers,’ but not everyone’s as honest about it as you are. So, props for that, I guess.” He tilted his head, his usual cocky grin returning, though it seemed more self-aware now. “But hey, if it helps, I do my best to keep my ego in check. It’s not as big as it looks.”

You blinked, unsure how to respond, but the words that came out were almost reflexive. “Well, you’re doing a pretty good job of hiding it, I guess. You’re going to be one of the top ten. I know it.”

Hawks laughed softly, the sound surprisingly genuine, and you found yourself relaxing a little. Maybe you hadn’t totally messed everything up. “You’re so sure about that? Well then fair enough. Just don’t expect me to give up my flashy style anytime soon. It’s a package deal.” He says that as if he doesn’t get In the top ten within a few months.

You could tell he wasn’t taking offense anymore, but you still felt like you needed to clear the air. “I mean, you’re doing your thing. I just—” You faltered, trying to find the right words, feeling like you were digging yourself into a hole. “I just didn’t want to be some random person making snide comments. You’re a pro hero, and I respect that.”

His eyes softened again, and there was an odd sincerity in his gaze. “Thanks. That means more than you know. You look about the same age as me so as you’re a pro as well, wouldn’t you know it you’ll be up there at the top, maybe we’ll have a hero rivalry” he smirks

“Ah yes the trials and tribulations of endeavour and all might persist in the bodies of 18 year old aspiring heroes” you pause for a moment thinking about it. You know that’s not too far from the original source material

“Well I’m not exactly a pro just yet, give me a few months and I’ll be there”

For a moment, neither of you spoke, the awkwardness between you two slowly evaporating. It was strange, how you’d gone from a sarcastic comment to a brief but genuine moment of understanding. And yet, in a world where everything seemed so scripted, the fact that this had played out in such a way felt a little… surreal.

After a beat, Hawks stretched, giving you a wink. “Well, I should probably get going. Hero stuff, you know?” He shrugged, turning on his heel. “But hey, if you ever need a hand or just wanna throw some more sarcastic remarks my way, I’m not hard to find.”

You managed a small, half-smile. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

He flashed you one last grin before taking off, his wings spreading wide as he took to the sky, disappearing into the distance. You watched him go, still feeling that odd mixture of guilt and amusement bubbling in your chest.

Shaking your head, you turned and continued on your way home, feeling slightly lighter, despite the awkwardness. At least you hadn’t ruined everything completely. But, then again, in a world like this, there was always something new to look forward to. Maybe you’d even see Hawks again and maybe next time, you’d be a little better at handling it.

Or, you’d at least try to be.

In this world, reports of people with superpowers started popping up everywhere. No one really knew what was causing these Quirks. And before long, the supernatural became the new normal. Dreams became reality, and the world turned into a superhuman society, with 80% of the population possessing some sort of strange ability.

Blah, blah, blah. The world might sound impressive at first, but being dropped into a world where you know everyone’s futures? That kind of ruins the excitement. Save the fun stuff for when Izuku is supposed to take over

You’d think living in a world of superheroes would be a dream come true, but it felt more like playing a life simulator with a DLC attached.

‘Actually if any one had heard that thought, please smite me dead on the spot’

Maybe when you finally met Shigaraki, you two could bond over how lame your lives were.

————

The moment Hawks took off, disappearing into the sky with all the grace and flair of a man who knew exactly how cool he was, you were left standing there, alone in the middle of a busy street. You blinked a few times, processing the bizarre encounter, like a glitch in the matrix where you’d just met one of the to be top heroes, and somehow managed to be the awkward, sarcastic mess you were known for.

Oh god, you thought, did I just make myself look like an idiot?

The awkwardness of the moment hit you all at once, like a ton of bricks. Your brain replayed every word you’d said, every overly dramatic sigh, and every time you’d made some weird comment about his ego. I probably just ruined any chance of ever having a normal conversation with him ever again, you thought with a groan.

But, hey, at least you’d gotten one thing right: you had no idea how to not embarrass yourself in front of a pro hero. Progress, right?

Your feet shuffled along the sidewalk, your eyes fixed on the ground, just in case anyone noticed how ridiculously flustered you were. You didn’t even know where you were going at this point, your legs had basically decided to take you home, but your brain was still stuck on the fact that you’d just made a snide remark to one of the most famous people in the world. That was bound to come back to haunt you, right?

In the midst of your spiraling, a thought hit you like a slap to the face: What if he tells people?

No, no, no, no. Hawks wasn’t the type to hold grudges. He’d probably just chuckle about it with his equally cool friends and forget about it. Right?

… what if he tells Mirko. All you feel is dread

But still, the mental image of him, sitting around with his hero buddies, casually telling them about the weird girl who got all awkward and snarky when she met him, was enough to make you want to curl up in a hole and disappear for the next decade. I’m never leaving my house again, you thought, hands buried in your pockets. It’s safer this way.

As you trudged home, you passed by the same old buildings, the same street vendors, the same couple having a heated debate about the proper way to cook curry (which, honestly, you were kind of invested in now). It was the same old world. But now, you couldn’t help but feel like you were living in some kind of sitcom where you were the awkward side character. This is what I get for getting tossed into this universe, you thought, rolling your eyes at the universe itself. And why am I still here? Shouldn’t I be a sidekick by now?

You eventually reached your apartment building, doing your best to ignore the fact that you’d just been face-to-face with Hawks and didn’t manage to do anything remotely cool or competent. The elevator ride felt longer than it should’ve. It was like the universe itself was giving you a moment to reflect on your life choices. By the time you reached your door, you felt like you needed to apologize to the doorframe for even existing.

With a dramatic sigh, you kicked off your shoes and collapsed onto the couch. You stared at the ceiling, wondering if you should’ve just said something normal like, “Hey, cool wings.” That’s it. Cool wings… nope absolutely not, move on, but no, you had to act like a nervous wreck who couldn’t even handle basic social interaction. Congratulations, you’re a disaster.

But as your mind started spiraling into self-loathing, you couldn’t help but chuckle a little. The whole situation had been so ridiculous, so out of place, that it was actually kind of funny. You’d just had a conversation with Hawks granted, it was a weird, awkward, almost cringeworthy conversation but still, a conversation! That was more than most people could say.

“Maybe I should just call it a day. Hide under the covers and pretend nothing happened.”

You threw your arms dramatically across your face as if the weight of your shame was too much to bear, but in the back of your mind, a tiny thought crept in: Hey, if I run into him again, maybe I won’t make a fool of myself next time.

Then again, you thought with a grin, Probably not.

At least tomorrow’s a new day, right? You could try to be normal then probably. Or at the very least, you could give yourself a good pep talk, like, “You got this, champ. Try not to make an idiot of yourself this time.”

As you lay there, wallowing in your embarrassment, you couldn’t help but let out a small laugh. Because, in the end, this was just another bizarre chapter in your weird, barely-coherent life in the world of heroes. Maybe next time, you’d at least try to make a good first impression. Or maybe, just maybe, you’d accidentally land on your feet and make it out of another embarrassing moment unscathed.

Who knew? Anything was possible in this crazy universe. Well, except you being smooth. That was clearly out of the question.

————

The bell rang, signaling the end of class, and as your classmates hurriedly packed their bags and ran out the door, you sat there, contemplating your life choices. Graduation was right around the corner, and while everyone else was excited about the future, you were just kind of… existing.

You were in your third year at UA, the very school that trained the next generation of Pro Heroes. But here you were, staring at your desk like it owed you money, with no idea what you were supposed to do next.

Let’s be real, everyone else had a purpose. Izuku? He was going to be the greatest hero of all time. All Might? He was the symbol of peace, the beacon of hope, and probably the only guy who could do a cartwheel and not look like a dad on a trampoline. Even Bakugo had a clear goal in mind: to be the best, which, considering his attitude, was more like a “do it or I’ll yell at you until you cry” kind of vibe.

But you? You were just here. You weren’t supposed to be in this world. Seriously, how did you even get here? One minute you were living your normal life, and the next you’re dropped into the middle of a world full of heroes, quirks, and crazy villains, but there’s no manual for how to fit in. It was like being cast in the world’s weirdest TV show and being told, “Yeah, just figure it out, you’ll be fine.”

And you were so fine. So fine, in fact, that you didn’t even know what the point of it all was. You had no grand dreams of becoming the next All Might or Deku. You weren’t even sure what your quirk was half the time, maybe you had an ability to be totally average? If so, congratulations, you were really nailing it.

“Look, you’re fine, you’re fine,” you muttered to yourself, giving the window a dramatic look. “You’ll graduate, become a hero, maybe stand by the snacks table at hero events, get a cool costume, the usual.”

You sighed, staring at the city below. Your classmates had their lives all planned out, while you had absolutely no clue what was happening. “Like, how do you even become a hero if you’re not, like, destined for greatness?” You asked, though you were fully aware the universe wasn’t going to answer. Or if it did, it would probably just laugh and say, “Sorry, you’re just here for filler content.”

You turned to the empty classroom, contemplating your entire existence for a moment. “Man, is this what it’s like to be a side character? ’Cause I really didn’t sign up for this. I was just trying to live my best life, and suddenly I’m here, trying to figure out if I should be saving kittens from trees or passing out flyers for charity events.”

A laugh bubbled out of you. “Who knows, maybe I’ll be that hero, the one who’s really good at handing out pamphlets at superhero conventions. You know, hero stuff. The job that’s always available but no one really talks about.”

You let out a half-hearted groan. “Ugh, I’m like a glorified intern in the superhero world. ‘Oh, sorry, your quirk is literally just being chill? Guess you’ll be a sidekick to the sidekicks!’”

But then it hit you: maybe that’s fine. Not every hero needs to be the big shot. Maybe your purpose was to just… exist. No huge fanfare, no dramatic showdowns with villains, just a random person who shows up at the right time to, like, hand out snacks or prevent a minor inconvenience. You could totally be that person! There’s a whole squad of heroes out there who are doing important stuff without anyone caring about them.

You snapped your fingers. “Wait a minute. Maybe this is my calling! I’ll be ‘The Human Buffer’. I’ll help all the heroes hand out protein bars, hold their coats while they go into battle, be that one person who’s just there to make sure they look good in their hero pose. Yeah, I could be that hero!”

You stood up, grabbed your bag, and strutted out of the classroom with newfound confidence. You might not have a big, world-saving destiny, but you would be the hero who was always there with the perfect snack after a long day of saving people. It wasn’t glamorous, but it was a role that needed to be filled, and by golly, you were going to do it.

“Alright, world,” you said dramatically as you walked down the hallway. “You don’t need me to save the day, but I’ll be here when you need someone to tell you where the bathroom is during a fight. Hero work!”

As you passed your classmates, all talking about their big future plans, you couldn’t help but laugh. Maybe you weren’t meant to be the hero everyone else was, but you were still going to make your mark. Whether they needed an emotional support snack or someone to bring them a towel after they worked up a sweat, you’d be there.

And hey, you’d probably get a cool title too: The Most Average, Most Helpful Hero.

It wasn’t that you didn’t like the idea of being a hero. Who wouldn’t want to swoop in and save the day, right? But the thing was, you didn’t belong here. You didn’t have that spark that made someone destined to be a hero. You weren’t meant to exist in this world. You were more like an accidental extra, someone who wasn’t supposed to show up on the hero timeline but somehow did. And now you were just… waiting for your scene to end.

It wasn’t that you didn’t respect heroes, of course, you did! But watching everyone around you with their grand dreams and bright futures made you feel a bit like the odd one out. Even if you’re living in a year with just side characters. They had their roles, their destinies. Meanwhile, you were stuck in a universe where things were already set in stone. It was like showing up to a concert that was already halfway over and realizing you’re just gonna have to sit in the nosebleeds for the rest of the show.

Keigo had mentioned once that it was important for heroes to ease the worries of the people. Isn’t it paradoxical that his future words are the ones giving you a path. That they had to be more than just strong, they had to make people feel safe. And you’d never had any doubts about that philosophy. But how could you be that person when you didn’t even feel like you were supposed to be here in the first place? It felt like playing a game you didn’t know the rules to, in a world that wasn’t yours.

Sure, you were about to graduate from UA and technically become a Pro Hero, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that you were sort of stepping into a role that didn’t really have anything to do with you. You had no grand dreams of fighting side-by-side with All Might in his final battle. There were so any many risks and what if a simple butterfly effect made the villains win by you being here. Honestly, you’d probably end up being the hero who handed out flyers for charity events or stood at the front of the line for photos to be safe. Was that the kind of hero you wanted to be?

“Well, I guess I’ll be a hero of some kind,” you muttered, though it was more out of obligation than excitement. “But what does it even mean if I don’t have some grand purpose in all this?”

A little chuckle escaped your lips. This was ridiculous. Here you were, stressing over your place in a world that was literally made up. You were a character in a story that already had its plot laid out, and yet you were still acting like you had to be a main character. It was all just so absurd.

But you didn’t want to be that person someone who just complained about fate and waited for something to happen. You could still make a difference in small ways, right? Maybe not as the next All Might or Deku, but as someone who showed up when it mattered, who helped out in their own way. The world was full of side characters doing small but important things, why couldn’t you be one of them?

With a grin, you stood up and grabbed your bag, heading out of the classroom to join the rest of your classmates. Maybe you weren’t the protagonist of this story, but hey, you could still make your mark on it. A little self-awareness never hurt anyone, right? Besides, in a world full of heroes, sometimes it was enough just to be one even if you were doing it a little differently than everyone else.

[katasstrophy]

Bruh Nagi being buff as hell after Manshine's training 🥰🥰🥰

sammy you deadass bout to make me objectify this man on main SO BAD this has been running something of a small marathon in my head so 😵‍💫😵‍💫 pls accept my humble word vomit

cw. [n]sfw. mdni. pro player! nagi + aged-up characters. bit of body worship(?) you ride his abs. nipple play (m. receiving). subby nagi (but he's actually a switch >:) + some fluff bc he's so baby :(

note. a bit rambly oop soz it’s bc i went insane. i describe how he looks like to ME (re: hot as fuck) but i guess y'all can read it too hehe<3

1.4k words -> how could you ever hope to keep your hands to yourself when nagi's body looks like that.

i feel like unless you have prior knowledge of the fact that nagi is a pro athlete, from a cursory glance, your first thought upon seeing him wouldn’t be “hmm i bet that dude is built like a brick house.” it doesn’t help that nagi’s basically the unofficial king of athleisure — his closet’s chockfull of loose-fitting hoodies and sweats. he barely owns anything else besides those monochrome hooded tracksuits (and sportswear for practice, i guess he’d need some of that too lol) because he claims it’s the only outfit that gives him unlimited access to just lounge about basically anywhere he pleases. it’s what he genuinely finds to be the most comfortable style for him as well. but if you’re fortunate enough to get a peak underneath the layers of baggy clothes? dear god nagi’s built like a fever dream. amen you’ll eat so good then he’s a whole ass feast. 

i’m gonna brazenly speak my truth here so don’t come for me >:( but! from what you’d consider to be “a typical footballer’s physique”, purely from that perspective, nagi’s legs are… not that impressive. his stagnant motivation has much improved ever since he committed to making a career out of soccer, but that doesn’t mean his slacker tendencies haven’t followed suit. don’t get me wrong, he still puts his all into every game so his legs are still very much capable of making your mouth water, but you won’t catch him sprinting up and down the field at full speed if he can help it. packed with lean muscle, his thighs are thick, calves well-defined with a few bold veins thinly zigzagging down the taut skin like a lightning strike on the occasion you happen to catch him after a particularly gruelling conditioning session. but compared to some of his teammates whose legs seem to be carved from iron, he’s a bit.. overshadowed.

it’s a fairly similar story with his arms. (i promise i’m not just talking shit lol i could NEVER my poor meow meow it’s gonna get so hot in a second i swear just bear with me!!!) again, it’s most definitely a drool-worthy sight. the stretch of his arms is long and sinewy, rolling with a set of generous biceps that flutter under the gentle scrap of your fingerpads and nails when he (totally intentionally) flexes the swell of muscle there. in his profession, he mostly uses his arms for balance and to create distance between himself and his opponents. buried in his private nook back home, he has a tendency to hold his phone above his head while playing mobile games — that blissfully only rarely come crashing down on his face — but his unrivalled favourite will, of course, always be enveloping you in his arms <3 

nagi’s not the most expressive person, but his subtle social cues become much easier to pick up on whenever he’s sleepy, which let’s be honest is almost always. he’s in dire need of a snuggle in those moments and not only loves, but craves being close to you physically, his face a canvas of huffy evidence of what a Big Deal this is to him if you learn to read the hidden hints (it’s a pursed, pouty frown nine times out of ten he ain’t slick lmfao). he kind of regards your presence as his “recharging station” what a cringe fail soggy loser man i adore him with my whole heart 🥹 his lanky limbs will snake around you with the security of a vine until you’re all cosy and wrapped up in each other, his hold bearing enough strength to not budge against any playful escape tactics you might attempt — at least not until he decides he’s had his fair share of quality snuggle time with you. 

nagi’s a practical man, however — the world doesn’t call him a lazy genius for nothing. for these, albeit lovely, purposes, he determined there’s absolutely no need to overexert himself by lifting weights to buff up his arms. he can get by just fine! there are definitely more jacked arms out there i’m sorry :(

but here’s the kicker. nagi’s tall. you could even say he’s huge — he’d tower over most people if he actually straightened his posture for once. so his muscle mass kind of stretches out a bit… unevenly throughout his body. he does have muscle mass though, plenty of it, actually, and he needs only to do one tiny little thing to remind you of it: lift his shirt up. 

it’s a subconscious, everyday thing for nagi to toy with the hem of his cotton tees. his fingers often grow restless if they’re just lying about, so playing with the material of his clothes is not only stupidly ready at hand but also helps to soothe the itch brimming along his fingers to do something with them. in the process, you’re rewarded with glimpses of his stomach often when he involuntarily ends up exposing the skin clinging to those hard planes. but what’s objectively worse for your sanity is when nagi comes trudging into the kitchen to ease his thirst. he never bothers with a glass from the cupboard, just swoops down to drink from the open tap, his adam’s apple bopping rhythmically as he swallows. there’s water coating his lips when he rises, a few droplets still running down his chin that he tugs on the ends of his t-shirt to lazily wipe away. it’s an innocent endeavour to him, but a sinful display for you, as it essentially shows off his entire, deliciously shaped midriff. nagi might slack off in other areas, but his core strength is insane. his torso is like a gift from the heavens, chiselled after the image of their gods and heroes. don’t even get me started on his abs.

because i cannot stress enough how perfect nagi’s abs are for grinding your sweet, drooling little cunny on :( the ridges of muscle packed together at his abdomen are firm, but twitch almost uncontrollably when you slowly drag your cunt up and down the sculpted slabs of his stomach that bump against your poor, swollen clit in a way that makes you delirious. your thighs bracket his waist as you move, his waist that is so trim and almost tiny compared to the broad stretch of his shoulders. you can feel the coarse, light hair of his happy trail graze against your bare ass, leading to his heavy, stirring cock still confined in his sweats for now as you continue to leisurely rut your pussy down his abs, leaving a slick mess behind. the hard cut of his v-line is so prominent a thin contour of shadow clings to the underside of it.

nagi wishes desperately that he could help you, that he could sink his fingers into the plush of your skin and push you down along his abdomen to accelerate your high, dictate a more intense pace for you by his hands and make you take it, but he’s too busy being a moaning, blubbering mess underneath you to take initiative. his large palm lies dormant at your waist, the other tangled in his snowy, sweaty bangs so he doesn’t miss even a blink of the intoxicating vision you present above him. he’s drunk on every salacious sound that comes tumbling from your lips, every wanton contortion of your gorgeous face as the lewd squelching of your pussy fills his ears. his defined chest is flushed red from arousal, shuddering with shaky exhales as he all but devours the sight of you — he thinks you using him for your own pleasure is so fucking hot. 

if you want to turn him into an utter wreck, whining like a bitch in heat, please please play with his nipples :( paw at his pecs all needy first, ‘n don’t be afraid to grip the flesh with the blunt of your nails. he’ll mewl about it, but you only need to shush and praise him, tell him how good he looks like this for you and he’ll behave. pinch at the pretty pink of his pebbled nipples, gently circle his areola with your tongue, sucking on the bud and nagi will lose his mind, might even cum untouched :( but that’s okay because he’s so turned on his refractory period is barely an issue, he’ll sink into your tight, sloppy walls in one go and fuck you absolutely senseless on his cock. it’s all you can do to scramble for purchase with your trembling fingers, marking up the milky expanse of his broad back and mouthing at his collarbones to stifle your near pornographic keens and cries as he mercilessly splits you open.

in conclusion nagi seishiro is built like a wet dream and i want him carnally </3

[worldlxvlys]

heyy an, i miss u sm so i got a request!! what if u start a sturniolo little sister thing (c.ai doesn't feed me enough) basically the plot i wrote on c.ai is reader (she has a name on c.ai but just go with y/n ig) is about to leave to go to a party in a sort of "revealing" outfit (it's not actually that revealing the triplets are just overprotective as shit in my plot) and they notice a few she's been wearing more revealing outfits these days and they lowkey wonder why. (that's not actually what happens in my plot but i'm gatekeeping it bc it's my comfort c.ai bot) and then you can go from here i guess!! in my plot, reader is a very whiny, easily annoying and whimpery girl, ykwim? like she's so easily hurt / upset. that's one of her main traits so hope it helps the development of the fic! ilysm🫶🏻

stand out

sturniolo triplets x sister! reader

warnings: cursing, mention of shitty ex

a/n: kind of got carried away, hopefully you like it tho

ily <33

“you’re not leaving in that” chris stated for about the fifth time that night. i was starting to get annoyed.

i’ll admit that my shorts were on the shorter side, but everything was covered.

“why chris? why do you care about what i put on my body?”

his jaw clenched as he let out a heavy sigh.

catching onto the annoyance that was written all over chris’s face, matt stepped in.

“look, what you decide to wear is completely up to you, we aren’t going to tell you what you can and can’t wear.” he placed his hand on my shoulder gently.

“we’ve just noticed that your outfits have been a little more on the revealing side lately-“ i cut him off, already knowing where this conversation was heading.

“ we? so you guys talk about how i dress when i’m not here?” his mouth opened and closed like a fish as my question caught him off guard.

nick then pitched in, “look, we’re genuinely just worried about you. we want to make sure you’re safe”

“i’m fine guys, seriously. i mean, everybody wants to stand out, right?” i watched as all of their faces dropped as they began to catch on.

matt tilted his head at me, “is this about your ex?” i let out a sigh at this.

he knows me too well.

when i broke up with my ex, matt was the person i leaned on. chris and nick were there for me, of course, but matt was the person who took me for late night drives to cheer me up. so, naturally, i spoke to him the most about my feelings.

when i was dumped, my ex told me i was just like every other girl and i tried too hard to fit in. while i tried to act like his words held no affect on me, they hurt me deeply.

they rang through my head constantly, no mater what i did. but, i didn’t want to completely change just because a man decided to use my biggest insecurity against me. so, instead, i decided to switch up my style.

what i failed to realize, however, was that my brothers were able to read me like a book.

and while the change in clothing choice was cute, it wasn’t me. it was uncomfortable.

“i hate that he still has so much power over me. it’s like no matter what i do, i can always hear his comments about me in my head.” i finally spoke.

“what did he say to you?” chris asked, growing concerned.

i looked down at this, feeling tears start to prick at the corner of my eyes.

“pretty much that there was nothing special about me and that i’m boring” i shrugged my shoulders, swallowing the lump that began to form in my throat.

“well he’s just flat-out wrong” chris stated, as though it was the most obvious thing he’s ever said.

i furrowed my eyebrows as i stared at him in confusion.

“um, hello? you’re literally the most insane person i’ve ever met”

i looked at him crazily, “is that supposed to make me feel better?”

“you’re the only person i’ve ever met that goes running for fun. that is borderline psychotic” i narrowed my eyes at him. “trust me, you’re not like any other girl” he finished.

i playfully rolled my eyes at him.

“plus” matt began, “isn’t this the same dude that thought that googled why he had a headache and was fully convinced he was dying?” i couldn’t help but chuckle at that.

nick then joined in, “besides, that motherfucker talks like he’s reading from a script written by the ginny and georgia writers, i promise you’re not missing out”

this sent the three of us into laughing messes. chris reached out for something to hold onto as he started to fall and, seeing as i was standing right next to him, that happened to be me.

chris clutched onto my shoulders as he began to bring me down with him, and the four of us doubled over in laughter.

——————

masterlist

tag list: @lovingsturniolo @lustfulslxt @gwenlore @flowerxbunnie @sturnssx @mattslolita @its-jennarose @sturnsdior @sophssturn @bernardsleftbootycheek @queen161718 @chrisdevora @cupidsword @nickmillersn1gf @stramboli4life @mattsneezing @chrisstankyleg @sturniolobltch @vib3swithanuk @ciarasturn1 @bethsturn @bernardenjoyer @mbbsgf @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @ssturniolo @blueeyedbesson @mxqdii @sturniolowhore @rheaakayourname @defnotayonna @urmom2bitch @abbie13sworld @starsturniolo @hearts4chriss @theyluv-meee @sturns-posts @carolinalikesthings @itzdarling @chrisstopherfilmed @judespoision @sstvrnioloo @littlebookworm803 @nicksdrpepper @chrisloyalgf

[squinch-depraved]

please more cscoop fluff smut anything i just need more im begging on my knees.

sorry for not posting, the last few days have been a bit insane but i should have more fics up soon :3 here's cooper taking reader's virginity been thinking about this for a while

CW: use of "girlfriend"

the unending, sputtering coughs you couldn't stop letting out left you embarrassed, and you felt your face burning more than it usually did when you smoked as cooper watched you with a shit eating grin on his face.

"shut the fuck up, dude," you warned once you could somewhat talk again. your throat still burned as you passed the bong back to him, but cooper knew you well (or at least he thought he did), so he traded you your drink for it.

"i literally didn't even say anything," he laughed. "i coulda, but i refrained." you giggled at his sudden accent and flopped back onto his bed.

"thank you for refraining," you mimicked his tone with the last word. "i would've had to bite you if you said something."

cooper cringed and stopped packing another bowl to look over at your face. "fuckin' bite me??"

"it's a sign of affection," you told him simply.

"eugh," he grunted as he shook his head with a smile. "are we at the affection stage?" the question, which you could barely hear, came after a few moments of silence.

turning to lay on your side so you could more easily see him (who was avoiding your gaze, it was his face that was red now), you thought for a moment about what he had asked you. "i mean. i'm in your bed. and we've been hanging out for... what, three straight days now? so like. i kinda figured we were. sorry," you started strong but were mumbling by the end.

cooper was suddenly able to look at you again and did so with wide eyes, placing his paraphernalia on his nightstand so he could give you his full attention. "no!! no, don't be sorry, i'm sorry! i just wanted to like... ask you and shit, y'know? so i didn't make you uncomfortable," he rambled. "it's just like. i don't know how to act around you, sometimes. you make my head feel all, fuckin'... i dunno, man, i'm sorry i'm probably not making any sense." his expression shifted from one of concern to one of regret for having said anything in the first place, but eased up a bit when you put your hand on his knee.

"coop. shut the fuck up. i promise you i prefer it when you actually talk to me rather than you clamming up like this. but just so you feel better, you make me feel... something, too, okay?" you spoke kindly so as not to make him feel unsafe and gently took his hand. it was softer than you thought it would be, and he laced his fingers together with yours in a way that felt natural. like your hands were made to intertwine. you both kept your eyes on your interlocked digits until he couldn't take it anymore and dove in to kiss you.

he immediately had you pinned down on your back against the mattress, and while all he was doing was making out with you, it was very obvious that he wanted more. you let him explore your mouth with his tongue, moaning when he grabbed both your hands, one by one, and laced his fingers together with yours just like he did earlier.

when he started grinding down onto you, though, as much as you hated yourself for it, you made a noise of concern and he immediately pulled away to inspect your face.

"wha's wrong?" he asked softly, letting go of one of your hands to wipe the spit from his lips.

"i don't- i'm not... i dunno how to talk about it," you murmured almost inaudibly.

"hey, 's okay," he assured you as he clambered off of you. he looked down at you from where he sat right next to you on the bed. "we don't have to, i'm so sorry. i went too fast, i shouldn't have thought that would be okay."

you rolled your eyes playfully at how much he cared and smacked at his legs. "it's not that!" he relaxed a tad for just a moment until you spoke again. "well, it is. but not like you think. like, i want you but i..."

he continued to look at you expectantly until you let out a big huff and said something all in one breath.

"i'mavirgin!!"

cooper looked dumbstruck for a second before realizing that wasn't the right reaction and composing himself. "ohkay. so. we don't have to do anything, 's fine!" he replied quickly, trying to mask the disappointment. he felt awful about it, but he had been wanting to tear your clothes off since he first saw you and damn, this was a huge blow to the gut. he had you under him, finally, and then all of a sudden he didn't.

"nonono, that's the thing!! i want to," you admitted as you sat up slightly.

"...are you sure?" he sounded puzzled.

"coop, you're my best friend. and, like, if i'm being honest, i've daydreamed for a while about it being you who finally takes it because i really want you and just. i trust you. i trust you not to hurt me, i trust you to make me feel good. i trust you. please," you begged him.

he made an involuntary noise as your words sank in, and you tried to be respectful and not stare at his dick twitching in his sweatpants.

"how do you... do you want me to just...?" he inched forwards slightly as if asking if he could take control and widened his eyes when you nodded.

"just fuck me, cooper. make me feel good. i trust you." the look in your eyes as you repeated the last phrase yet again caused his brain to short circuit for a second. but then, in an instant, he was on top of you again, kissing you like you would fade away if he lessened his grip. he moved down to your neck, pressing smooches of adoration to your skin until he took your flesh in his teeth and bit, hard, earning a pitiful yelp from you.

"does that feel good?" he asked into your ear. "you gotta tell me so i can make this perfect for you." his hot breath made you squeal, and he wouldn't kiss you any more until you answered him.

"yes, coop, please. more," you whined. he smirked and set to work removing your clothes, first the hoodie that he had lent you (which he was ecstatic to find you weren't wearing a shirt or bra under) so he could swirl his tongue around your nipple while playing with the other in his hand, and then he removed your shorts and panties.

when you were nude under him, unable to meet his eyes, he planted a line of kisses down from your sternum, to your hips, to the inside of your thighs, and finally arrived at your core. he licked a stripe up your folds, savoring the taste of you on his tongue as he watched you writhe and toss your head back from how good you felt. soon, your legs were locked around his head in an attempt to bring him closer, and he worked two fingers in and out of you while he ate you. it wasn't long before you were screaming his name while you thrashed about on his bed, cumming harder than you ever could on your own.

once he was satisfied, cooper pulled away and came to kiss you. the sight of your juices all over his face made you wish you could take a picture. after a bit of him making sure you were still good to go, he took his own clothes off and reached into his drawer for a condom.

you admired his length in secret while he fumbled with the wrapper and slid the protection on, feeling a little scared but mostly excited. once he was ready to go, he positioned himself between your legs again and gently patted the outside of your thigh.

"you ready?" he looked so eager, but he wouldn't do anything until you responded.

"fuck you and your chivalry, makin' me beg for it. yes i'm-" you cut yourself off with a shriek when he slid into you, the stretch deliciously painful. "oh my god!!"

cooper was grinning, not even halfway in and he had you screaming? he was gonna have a hard time not getting a big head about this. but he continued to push in, giving you some time with every inch he stuffed into your little hole until he bottomed out with a low groan.

he checked on you one last time, pressing a kiss to your hand before he started moving. your fingers stayed locked together as he fucked you; he was insistent on making sure you felt loved while he ruined you for the first time.

"coop- nnghhh," you babbled incoherently, trying to express how good you felt, but you couldn't get any words out. the blond just kept going for what felt like hours, rolling his hips at a steady pace and groaning every time you clenched around him.

"god, i know you've never been fucked before, but you're so tight," he laughed breathlessly. "this feelin' good, baby? hmm?" the question (combined with how overstimulated your pussy was beginning to feel from being used like this for the first time) caused a knot to start forming in your stomach.

"so good!!! fuck, cooper, i can't- 's too much, it feels too good!" you wailed. the spasms of your walls around his cock signaled to him that you were going to cum, and he increased his pace slightly in anticipation. when you finally came undone, you wrapped your legs around him as you cried out, eyes rolling back into your head. he watched your face as you finished, gently wiping the single tear that fell with his thumb.

now, he could really have some fun. not that this wasn't fun, this was the best time he had ever had. but making you orgasm twice surely meant he deserved to focus on himself a little bit, right? so he slowed down to ask you a question.

"can i move you?"

you nodded, out of breath, and let him guide you into the position he wanted (on your hands and knees, ass presented to him like you were making an offering to a god). he squeezed the flesh of your behind as he entered you again, letting out a low grunt when he was able to get deeper in you from this angle. you emitted a strained whine at how far inside you he was able to reach, but sat there and took it when he began slamming his hips against you. the smacking sound of skin against skin with every thrust was hypnotizing as you lay there, face pressed against the mattress, so far gone that you could only let out whimpers at how incredible your best friend was making you feel.

"fuck," he panted after a while, "i'm gonna cum. i'm gonna cum, i'm gonna-" he spoke rapidly before grabbing your hips and slamming you back onto his shaft, earning a yelp from you. the moan he let out as he spilled into the condom would stick with you every time you remembered this experience.

his fingers gently rubbed your skin where he had been gripping you, and he slowly pulled out after a minute of heavy breathing.

"are you okay? did i hurt you?" he asked, turning you over so he could check on you. you went limp so he could maneuver you onto your back again and blinked up at him through hazy, lidded eyes.

"i'm fine, coop," you mumbled. "i need water and another fuckin' bong rip though, jesus."

he laughed quietly and pressed a loving kiss to your lips. "was that okay?" inspecting your expression for honesty, he tried to wipe off the mascara that was now caked onto your face. you shied away and instead brought his hand to hold your face tenderly.

"that was perfect. exactly what i wanted."

cooper smiled softly and kissed you again before helping you get dressed and walking you to the bathroom. when you got back, he had a bowl packed and waiting for you, along with some snacks and drinks.

"can we please have an official movie date now? i feel like a huge asshole fuckin' you like that when i haven't even treated you to a real evening. and i know this is no different than what we've been doing, hanging out in my bed, but this time i'll let you pick the movie and we can hold hands!" his goofy grin warmed your heart the second you saw him.

"of course. only if this means i'm your girlfriend, though," you countered with a raised brow.

cooper chuckled quietly and walked over to you, pulling you in for a long kiss before replying, "wouldn't have it any other way."

[aro-culture-is]

Aro culture is I made some posts about how like when I say im Aro people assume lots of other stuff goes with it automatically like I have to be ace to and I have to do qprs to like “make up for being Aro” and I’ll explain no but then people act like I’m just nasty and then they start like making jokes about my sex life and being insanely invasive and talking like what I’m doing makes me cool but like evil at the same time? And like I’m just doing this so I don’t have to connect with people? And I’m like dude no I’m not “choosing” this tf I’m not doing this to be cool or mean this is just how I work that doesn’t make me like a asshole or a bully or some cool guy

and I made a post like whining about it and people were in the tags being supportive but they made assumptions to they were saying like shout out to the aroallos who don’t fuck or who like aren’t having sex we’re not gross! and it’s like yeah that’s great man and that IS true but that’s so not what I was talking about at all and not my situation at all and now there’s just more assumptions and it makes me feel like more isolated and upset and like they would think I’m gross and I don’t know they could’ve just misread it or something

I wish there weren’t so many damn assumptions and people wouldn’t assume preferences and stuff there’s lots of different ways to be you don’t know unless someone tells you and if you do get it wrong and they correct you then listen please man I’m tired of it being like I have to water it down and half ass my sexuality or else I’m a predatory sex crazed evil asshole or something like damn man people can like sex and be aromantic without being satan incarnate himself I don’t know dude I don’t like it when people put words in my mouth and the misunderstandings on the Aro post and Aro comics I made really reminded me of all that

With the comic I made I didn’t specify if the character in there was sexual or not because it didn’t matter and I didn’t want that to be the focus the focus was how aromantic people who aren’t ace get treated like predators a lot and it’s either treated like oh it’s cool you don’t care and you hurt people or you’re fucking horrible etc and THAT was the point that’s what I wanted it to come across as and be the focus of like cause what you do isn’t relevant if you have sex a lot or not there’s going to be comments like that it’s not about what you actually do it’s about how people see you and react to what they think is happening yk it’s about assumptions but then people started assuming things about me or implying that the character and I didn’t fuck as much and shout out to us and people like us and I’m like dudee nooo you’re missing the point

anyway sad misunderstanding reminding me of other sad shit Eugh :(

sorry that happened, but also. holy moly long submission

[miltonbarbie]

What does Stan's friend group love about you? (Sp x F!y/n) </3

Warning(s): Slight NSFW

Reader is Female, and in these scenario you and your dp (Desired person, for example: Kyle) are already in an established relationship.

</3

Stan🎧���� :

Dude loves any form of affection you give him, whether it be quick kisses to long, warm hugs, he feels like he'll throw up any second.

He wishes he could call you pet names but he's gonna get sick in the stomach REAL fast.

he also makes playlists of songs that remind him of you and sends them to you + puts them visible on his Spotify account

he doesn't show any clingy-ness or PDA around his friends bc cartman's such an ass and he'll get teased for days, but in private all he wants to do is cuddle w/ you and watch a Christmas movie together

loves loves loves when you mindlessly copy his actions, he think its soso cute. Like for example if he does a secret handshake with one of his friends and catches you trying to make one with yours, he's gonna die of how adorable it is.

He likes to go skating with you, if you don't know how to skate he'll gladly teach you

Get's hard whenever he sees you in a skirt 🙏🙏

Whenever he texts you and you send him pictures of yourself being all cute n' shii, his eyes widen and he automatically saves them to his camera roll with a sly grin on his face.

bro thinks he's mf swiper with his devious ass

he gets realllll horny whenever you sit with your legs crossed on a desk/table, or when you twirl your hair and make eye contact while talking to him. my guy's gonna be walking around with a huge boner the whole day in pain until you relieve him.

Kyle 🎮💚:

He tries extremely hard not to get flustered whenever you hug him from behind

Especially when you compliment his hair and play with it/start flirting with him while you do it. ITS JUST SO ENLKBVJVBENKJJ FOR HIM HE GOES WILD

"Kyle baby, you look so cute with your hair out like that .." "I- h-hah .. T-thank you .." Then he legit MELTS INTO YOUR TOUCH HE'S SO DESPERATE

he wants to act all tough and whatnot 4 you but you make him so vulnerable

what makes him hard as a fucking rock is when he's sitting down on his chair and you bend over towards him with your titties on the desk, arms crossed. HANDS DOWN CATCHES HIM OFF GUARD SO QUICKLY HIS EYES DART STRAIGHT TOWARDS YOUR TITS 😔😔

He lovesss seeing you wear his hoodies, something about it is just.. makes him feel some sort of way..

he gets really excited whenever you ask him to tutor you, it means you two get to spend more time together

If someone insults you he's gonna get MADD ANGRY

Like his anger issues will not allow someone to disrespect you like that.

he's always at your beck and call, if you need him, he's there.

Send him a bikini pic and he's gonna have a seizure.

"SHIT Y/N IM WITH MY FRIENDS WHAT IF THEY SEE IT?!??1!?!?!/11/1/ FUCK WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME AMEOIDOAEINAMSLKN"

STUDY DATES ARE HIS FAVOURITE BUT ALSO GOING OUT TO CAFE'S >>>>>>>>>>

He gets really blushy and nervous whenever your showing him so much affection to towards him infront of his friends, but he secretly likes it, he just doesnt wanna seem like a baby.

Whenever you get better grades than him he either celebrates for days or cries in a corner for hours. There's no in between.

Kyle is honestly so overprotective like if he sees a guy staring at you hes gonna straight up smack their face with a stack of graded homework assignments.

He jealousssss 🤭 he HATESSS admitting it though hes so whiny abt it too.

"Y/nn, I'm not jealousss babeee shutt uppp-uh 😠😠" Like a frickin 10 year old, LMFAO WHY DO I ACTUALLY IMAGINE HIM SAYING THAT THOUGH

Kenny 🏠🧡:

Lovesss showing/giving PDA doesn't matter where you are or who you're with

Bro is soso touch-starved its insane

He holds you by the waist while he leans in for a kiss, he low-key smells like cigarettes and car gas but I'm kinda into it ngl 🤷‍♀️

Whenever he gets touchy, it's not always going to be sexual but this man has some pretty horny thoughts but you cant blame him

Hes so whiny and wants you to touch him REALLY BADLY.

"Y/nn please please please I love you so much please just this once oh my God please your so hot I'm gonna suffocate I love you just this once please please PLEASEEEEEE-" "Kenny omg calm down wtf-"

His weak spot is seeing you in clothes that bring out your figure, I mean, girls look better in a real tight sweater ifkwim 😋

The only time he will EVER be the submissive one during sex is when hes balling his eyes out about something that's happened at home, or when he's high on sumthin'

If he's going to see you, he sometimes brings karen with him because he loves the little relationship you two got going on, also his parents are always arguing so it'd be a huge relief for both Karen AND Kenny.

Send him ONE picture and he'll be begging on his knees for more

"MOMMY SORRY MOMMY SORRY- OH GOD SEND MORE- I NEED- creams aggressively YOUR A FUCKING GODDESS OH LORD HAVE MERCY GOAWDH DAYHUYHM 😍😍"

It's a big bonus if you come from a wealthy or rich family cause then you can spoil Kenny and his siblings rotten like how they deserve 😔💞

Please treat karen well she really looks up to you, your like her idol and shes def your #1 fan, she'll always be talking about you and how amazing and thoughtful and pretty you are ITS JUST SO AAAAAAA KAREN IS SO CUTEEE 😖

Kenny doesn't have much but he'll try to save up ENOUGH money to get you something nice like a headband or some nail polish 😚

He's trying.

He just wants you to be happy with him.

Please get married.

Cartman 🍗❤️:

Oh no.

When people started finding out that Cartman had feelings for the one and only, Y/n, they felt so sorry and started giving u random things and being oddly kind around you.

You were like: ???

If he sees a guy flirting or talking to you, he's gonna lower their self esteem to the MAX.

Like he'll be soso rude abt it too

"What kind of dumb fuck like you would get any girls? You got to be kidding me, your dumber than Kahl."

Once you started dating him, man everyone in the school was either shocked, no- not shocked, literally flat-out concerned for your well-being.

Cartman, REEAAAALLLYYYY .. ?

He always wants your attention, even when your busy doing something he'll be texting you at the most randomest times saying "I'm coming over", and shows up at your door in less than 2 minutes.

If you give him a hug or a kiss in public, he'll be acting all tough and start bragging to his friends. But once he's alone, he'll start giggling and twirling around like a fangirl (😨)

He has so many bad pictures of you on his camera roll but it takes all of your convincing skills to tell him: DONT. POST. THE PICTURES.

He doesn't wanna participate in any tiktok couple challenges bc he thinks their stupid. Buttt unless you offer Kyle to do it then he's def gonna cave in 🤭.

He's such a toddler too

He'll secretly want to be the little spoon often but if you offer him his face starts looking like a whole-ass sunburn with an offended look on his face

"AHEM? No we are NAWT doing that. You? Cuddling ME? No no no, its supposed to be the other way around, "Y/n" 🙄"

He'd diss your music taste and then you'll catch him twerking to your favorite song

He just like that y'know?

[t4tpumpkinduo]

ok let me say smthing rq ☝️ the reason i'm insane and often v focused on cpumpkins on this blog is bcs. well. first off, cschlatt is my favorite most special little princess and i adore spreading love/cute things with her to a fanbase that largely misunderstands and villanizes her. (as well that art of her is also significantly easier fr me to draw than others spoon wise sorry for thinking with my. heart. ♡)

and secondly, being around and int-ing with what i have many times called a word of mouth ass fanbase, a fanbase tht often doesn't int w the source material at all, that purposely ignores or discards or lets their biases make their opinions for them, it makes me want to shine a light even harder on a dynamic that i find v textually rich and compelling!! as a true obnoxious lorehead!! i don't often see very many cpumpkinheads, and i've seen even less that analyze and lay out the scenes, or go to bat for what their relationship is and represents. they're a great great duo and i'd be so happy for more ppl to pick up what i'm putting down and i can only hope i'm making a lil dent in this cruel cruel world :'] for smthing tht means v much to me.

that said, despite this being a deeply important dynamic i'm v passionate abt and smthing i v often focus on, i never want to be confused w smone who reduces characters to like... ship mush. who strips characters of their hopes and dreams and aspirations and wider connections in sm thin veiled attempt t idk. legitimize? is that what it is? and you know exactly what i'm talking abt so 👎 long ass analysis + talk abt their relationships to others under the cut bcs i got carried away

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starting w my princess, cschlatt's connections to other characters is like....the stuff he has with cclingy is CRAZY!! they both admired him so much, they parallel him directly! when he first joined the server, he was taking selfies w them, indulging them and riffing with them, and i've seen ppl argue abt this but the actual reason he built the cuck shed in the dsmp was FOR cclingy, to make them laugh! he talked to them for hours after he was banned off the server in just earnest connection.

and while ofc he made mistakes w tubbo, those mistakes are not uniquely evil as they're ones characters (like cwilbur) KEPT MAKING both DURING the pogtopia-manburg war and then long after it ended. he sees tubbo as smone who was also slighted by cwilbur, and it's not a coincidence everyone is his cabinet was. he wanted to toughen him up so he wouldn't go through the same things he has! that want to make him stronger vs the self hate he feels for himself and how that leaks into the ints he has w smone he sees as similar vs the earnestly seeing him as a pal and feeling deep betrayal at the ctubbo feeding pog information. (cschlatt actually Knew ctubbo was sneaking off, that he was talking to ctommy, and he was fine w that + he actively let him!! 😭 it was only when he found out ctubbo was a traitor did he start crumbling.)

he pawned off hurting him to ctech, the same way cwilbur did to ctommy in the pit, two deeply psychotic dudes being used as playthings, with their backs against the wall, hurting their little guy in the process but not being able to bring themselves to do it so they get smone else in hopes that'll put a stop to it, only for the guy to values HIS OWN SELF above anyone else and do it anyways. and then they both kill themselves with guilt forever about it. cschlatt loses a LIFE during the festival, that's how much this was weighing on him, and then when he revives he's still so delusional he forgets what happened and calls for tubbo. like. ofc, that's not an awesome thing to have happened, but the rest of the factors are unignorable.

and tubbo to him...despite how ctubbo compartmentalizes those who hurt him, (grinning and bearing ctech n cphil for safety but throwing them under the bus to cwilbur for safety), the way he ints w schlatt is noticeably... different. he takes and agrees w his policies, keeps most of them as new lmanberg and admits they were good, he feels guilty about going against him, doesn't think he's all that bad and he gets punished for that! he goes as far to point out and realize cschlatt is being scapegoated for the situation in the first place, same as he was as president! (ofc to a different extent)

with ctommy, he would actively join calls w the kid and hang out DURING MANBURG!! 😭 ctommy would mildly snipe at him At Most and cschlatt would go ehhh you suck too buddy. and then they'd just chill together. he invited ctommy to manburg, for god's sake. ctommy is also one of the characters who continues to bring up cschlatt in a positive light, even up to his final streams saying things like cschlatt was his hero and it's CWILBUR'S FAULT that everything went to shit surrounding that.. they have sm in common, their relationships to others their posturing the way they joke around, the struggles with addiction and having their control and personhood ripped away URWGH

and with wilbur....like v v point blank one of the reasons they spiral so bad (aside frm being sabotaged by bigger forces than themselves + being deeply sick and mentally ill), was THE BETRAYAL OF EACHOTHER!!! look at the stuff i wrote for them above!!! they die on the same day, they directly fling shit at eachother constantly personally spitefully they Know eachother and it's all coming frm a place of hurt. he broke my heart how could he do this to me how could he use me as a prop how could he let me down my loverboy my pretty princess are you SERIOUS? glatt n ghostbur were hanging out together and glatt is seen reminiscing on him with fondness and nostalgia like can we get real. and they have textual sauce in smplive too don't start w me.

ponk being a quack doctor cat murderer but she tried as cschlatt's medic, she even shows remorce abt not being better for him,,,and he likes her right back, he's like extremely nice to her and even offers to make her a floor of emeralds for what he's done for him. THE GUY WHO USES EMRALDS TO MARK THINGS OF VALUE? cnikis letter to him, saying she wishes him well, that she hopes he's resting smwhere smhow....tch. TCH.

starting w cq...like i've gone over this before and iwill again. his relationship with cclingy helps define his entire shit he LOVES those kids he does RIDICULOUS things for them in mind.

the reason cq even joins is bcs of a tommy invite, his first appearance is actually a vc where he and tommy are chattering and stealing...they already know eachother, they're already fond of eachother! and alongside the good times, cq's there for every horrible thing tht ctommy is subjected to, he visits him in exile he's there on the grid when cdrm shows his ass abt what he's doing to him, why he's doing it, he finds out ctommy died the day it happened and goes numb and then CRAZY and when he sees him revived, he's practically crying with joy.

one of the reasons for butcher army even existed was the being able to help ctommy! he wants to kill cdrm and to do that he needs to kill ctech, an active threat and accomplice to cdrm! he failed ofc, but the intent was blatantly there. and later in the custody stream, when ctommy confronts him bcs of it, not knowing why the butcher army didn't just go get him when they couldn't, when the killing of figures putting him in danger was FOR that, he'd RATHER LET CTOMMY BELIEVE HE DIDN'T TRY AT ALL THAN WEAPONIZE EXILE FOR HIM. he wanted to kill cdrm outright for what he did to ctommy, he was a seconds away from it, and then when other forces push him into the torture, he's seen using a potato as a blunt weapon to drive his points home. like what do you think that means. he pulls himself frm ccharlie's death and disappearance and the first thing he does is go tell ctommy he'll protect him, that he can always come to lnv....killing myse. self. and ctommy cares abt cq too, he relies in him, he trusts him, he gave him one of the only slash hugs he's ever given he deduces that cq is a torturer by pure chance and still rocks w him and even like actively encourages it bro does NOT care abt his crimes 😭 that's his buddy i fear

and ctubbo... if anything that relationship parallels cschlatts to ctubbos, the being harsh on a kid so the same things that happened to you don't happen to him, so you can toughen him up b4 the world crushes him in it's teeth. and even when they argue, even when they don't see eye to eye, they care about eachother they matter to eachother,,,post doomsday, saying they wanted to move forward, stay working together the want to run a business together, q apologizing for his harsher actions and making it clear how he cares abt him.

and with the cookie outpost...ctubbo is the kind of person who can't confront ppl he's actually afraid of or angry at often, like the syndicate, and instead he has "safe" targets of ppl he can lash out at and redirect it at bcs he knows they won't hurt him back. AND CQ IS ONE OF THOSE PPL! IF NOT THE MOST CONSISTENT ONE!! he knows he can posture he knows he can go so far as to outright threaten cq and he won't ever lay a hand on him. the fact they can even talk it out so easily, the fact cq hated cdrm fr what he did to ctubbo too! saying so explicitly! getting furious when others threaten or put him in danger to the point of trying to physically beat their asses like brother

cbbh's decent into being egged like fucked up cq so badddd dude....the way cq didn't understand the full extent of being possessed since he was able to pull away frm it (barely and screaming the whole time but yget it.) the being brought to the egg in the first place by smone he cared so much, by smone he considered truly good and trustworthy,,,the fact the first person cbbh truly opened up abt the further reaches of the egg was cq...the fact cq went to bat against it over and over, putting himself in danger multiple times bcs thts all he could think of to get through to bad...them cooing and laughing and having fun together so so often and one of the few times cq indulges in femininity is wearing a cute pink little bride's outfit to go on a date w bad like 😭

sam is his FATHER dont argue w me they say it explicitly. he took care of him over and over, he looked out for him always the REASON cq is able to manipulate him as much as he can is bcs that's his DAD. ossium meant so much to him BCS he got him w csam and cgeorge. i won't go on abt this one too bad bcs scarduoisms like kill me dead w grief but trust that i understand trust trust.

his stuff with foolish i just talked abt so i wont retread but be aware he's always been his buddy and understood where he was coming from as smone who was once IN cq's shoes, and chose to be by his side in shitty moments idc if that was retconned. and i won't linger or touch on ctnt bcs like respectfully you've seen it already, ppl talk abt it all the time unignorably so. yes, a lot of it is straight up misrepresented or lies but DW thts not wht this post is ABT!!! ☝️

but what it IS about is. idk. the thing that makes the dsmp so special in the first place is...connections, it's hope it's love it's choosing eachother. how on days where everything was the bleakest and worst ppl still found a way to care, to show support, that in this terrible server that chews ppl up and spits them out with scars and wounds and sharp edges and terrible mistakes, ppl will STILL love them and want them in their life. bcs thts what it's like to live ♡

so yes. cpumpkins is v v v v v good, of course they are, i'll always be the cpumpkins guy but DO NOT GET IT TWISTED ☝️ they can love eachother while having their wider connections not only enrich themselves but the narrative they inhabit. the dsmp is abt love of every kind don't you forget it

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*also let it be known i use cwilb as my example a lot cuz 1. he's the fanon darling that gets at least half his streams watched so everybody will know wht im talking + 2. if you can have empathy for his actions when they're worse than others you can have empathy for those 😭 thanks

[zhuoyichenpretty]

ep 24 commentary (brain fried edition)

my head is a little empty after ep 24 tbh!! brain is not braining after all the zyc hurt no comfort (-:

some scattered thoughts here and there, painstakingly corralled like cats out of my vacuous brain and into a list (spoilers):

ZYZ is really emo this episode poor dude like he is having a hard time keeping it together it seems. Every other word out of his mouth is depressing as shit, which is saying a lot considering how depressing he usually is already (': I kind of wanted this episode to pick his brain more, give him room to emote in the aftermath of all that. But it almost feels like the character refuses to be alone, like he might spiral if he has too much time to get in his own head. I'm still so curious to know, though, what he thinks about the state of their promise in light of how far ZYC went trying to save him. “He has us,” ZYZ said to WX. When the time comes, I wonder how he'll reconcile that with what he’s asked of ZYC.

PSJ and Ying Lei bonding! shenanigans! I did laugh thank you guys. Also, not that the team didn't operate separately before, but I really get a sense of how much ZYC held things together with how apparent his absence is. It's obvs heartwarming seeing how hard everyone is working to save him (PSJ especially for me bc I love their mutual tacit trust and respect and all the ways they're alike and different), but ultimately it's still so angsty (':

Kind of love the couple instances where ZYC has been referred to as fragile/weak/of delicate constitution (depending on how you wanna translate it) like that's a very interesting quality to assign to basically the tank of your team. Even if the comments are made facetiously, it just reminds me of how often we witness his mortality, and of course how everything about the styling, aesthetics, and content of the flashbacks to his childhood reinforce a characterization of vulnerability at the very heart of him. I saw someone mention how the Cloud Light Sword responded to ZYC's tears and to that vulnerability rather than brute strength, and I totally agree. I love how this "fragile" characterization plays into the whole fate weapon deal. ZYC's strength is (imo) unconventional, and it is his sensitivity, his compassion, and his deep capacity to feel that the sword acknowledges, resonates with, and empowers. Almost like it protects his tender heart rather than making it something he needs to overcome to get stronger.

One thing I will never get over is how incredibly they styled TJR as baby!Yichen, adult ZYC, and Bingyi. What do you mean this is all from one drama and not three separate productions. Insane. I'm out of my mind with how gorgeous every change in costuming is.

A tangential note is I've seen people mention (paraphrasing very much here) ZYZ's demon form being nicely subtle in its eerie inhumanity and tbh I have a similar feeling even just about human adult ZYC imo. Especially when his hair is down and he's got that thick eyeliner on and we get a close up of his contacts, if you told me from the start that he's half-demon half-human or something I'd believe it. Along the same vein, baby!Yichen reads completely human to me, and Bingyi of course completely demon. Something something the Cloud Light Sword bridges the gap something. This point is unintelligible and not narratively based but I had to make it because I've been thinking "wow ZYC elven" for days now.

Saw a tag about yuanyi getting us through some dark times but man they are PUTTING me through some dark times rn help?/

Been trying to put off talking about the baby Yichen scenes because wow I cried immediately. Well, no, I was like "yay! I love seeing baby Yichen!" and then they crushed me into demon dust lol. And then WX had to tell that absolutely precious story about when she got sick and ZYZ had to go like "actually ZYC was probably lonely as fuck" and yeah that's fine I didn't need my heart anyway.

Ending on this point so I can put a pretty screencap here: There is so much gravity to just the short scene of Bingyi removing his mask and dropping to his knees with that anguished and fatigued expression. TJR's acting is the gift that keeps on giving (me angst).

so sorry if anything here didn't make sense, i currently have the same thousand-mile-stare as Bingyi the more i think about how this all might end and how long I'm gonna have to wait to find out.

[bloody-bee-tea]

Beetober 2024 Day 12 - Peach

Hitoshi stares off into the distance. He lets the chatter of his friends wash over him, the gentle cadence interrupted only by Mina's bright laugh, by Denki's cheerful exclamations and of course by Bakugo's yelled death threats.

All in all it’s not very peaceful but it's disgustingly familiar and Hitoshi feels himself sink further into his chair.

"Oi, shitty extra, you got nothing to add?" Bakugo snaps out some undetermined time later and Hitoshi blinks his eyes open, unaware of when they slipped close.

"Add to what?" he rasps out and he tries to remember what they've been talking about before he maybe, possibly, drifted off to sleep.

There had been talk about a case, maybe? But that could also just be a figment of his imagination, Hitoshi wouldn't put it past his brain because it's not as if he can expect anything from it after almost three days awake.

"You doing okay, buddy?" Denki carefully asks and Hitoshi lolls his head around to look at him, decidedly not thinking deeper on how hard it is to drag his eyes away from Bakugo's piercing glare.

It's always hard to look away from him, he commands attention in every room he steps into, and it doesn't help that Hitoshi has a stupid pathetic crush on the other hero. Still, he somehow manages to fix his attention on Denki, though he can feel Bakugo's gaze still on him.

"Came off a—" Hitoshi trails off, because he doesn't actually remember if he had a double or maybe quadruple shift after he got out of his last mission so he weakly ends with "—long shift at work."

He mentally congratulates himself on actually finishing the sentence but it seems as if his friends are only more worried now.

"When was the last time you slept?" Mina asks, leaning in slightly, her big eyes narrowed at him.

"What day is today?" Hitoshi shoots back when he can't quite get his days in order.

"Thursday, you dementic asshole," Bakugo hisses out and Hitoshi gives him a lazy thumbs up.

"Maybe Tuesday then, but definitely Monday," he says, because he remembers waking up from a nightmare on Monday morning. That means he must have slept at least long enough to dream so it counts.

He can't quite remember if he slept since but—well. That's not totally unusual for him after coming back from a monthlong mission and soon enough his body will forcefully shut him down, which is the only thing he’s hoping for at this point.

Hitoshi does hate it so when his therapist is on her time off.

"You're insane," Denki whispers out, clearly horrified by what Hitoshi has said but he simply shrugs.

There's nothing he can do about it, he tried all the things already. It just doesn't work, and especially not after an undercover mission that almost went to shit. He learned to live with it and usually he doesn't mind it much.

He has his dads he can talk to and his therapist normally, and in a day or two his sleep schedule will go back to its regular four to five hours a night and Hitoshi will be fine.

He always is.

"Why are you even here, if you haven't slept?" Bakugo wants to know and Hitoshi forces himself to focus on him.

"Excuse me for wanting to spend time with my friends, who I rarely see because of shitty missions," he tells him and immediately Denki coos.

"Aww, Toshi, you called us your friends." He clasps his hands in front of his chest, his eyes big and watery and Hitoshi regrets ever opening his mouth.

"Gonna take it back if you're being weird about it," he grumbles and does not perk up when Bakugo snorts out a soft laugh.

"Shouldn't have ever mentioned it in the first place, Pikachu is going to latch on to that and never let it go," he lazily drawls out and it almost sounds like a threat, especially when Denki nods enthusiastically.

"I'll just make him forget. As soon as I get enough brainpower to actually hold on to him," Hitoshi mutters, his eyes closed again and he only blinks them open when he's met with silence.

"Dude, you're like, dead on your feet. Go home. You have some time off now, right?"

"Entire next week," Hitoshi nods.

"We could have met literally any other time than today," Mina sighs out and pats Hitoshi's head. "Please go home and sleep."

"I'm gonna crash for three days straight when my body shuts down and I wanted to see you before."

"Alright, that's it, up you go, zombie face, this is just pathetic and sad and you need to sleep. The extras will still be here when you join the land of the living in three days."

The extras maybe, but Bakugo won't because he's scheduled to go on an oversea mission for the next two weeks and Hitoshi really wanted to see him, too.

He'd rather die than admit that, though, so he simply flips Bakugo the finger but he does get up, swaying on his feet once he manages to stand upright.

"Did you bike here?" Denki warily asks him and Hitoshi shakes his head.

He's not quite that stupid.

"Train," is all he says and when he almost topples over because everything keeps shifting with how tired he is, Bakugo shoots up and catches him.

"Fucking hell, eggplant, you really are so goddamn stupid," he mutters as he slings Hitoshi's arm over his shoulder and hitches him up, one of his stupidly muscled arms wrapped around Hitoshi's middle.

"What are you doing?" Hitoshi mutters out, even though he can't quite stop himself from leaning into Bakugo and his enticing heat.

It's okay if he can brush it off as being too tired to stand, right?

"Getting you home, what does it fucking look like?" is the harsh reply he gets and Hitoshi frowns.

"I can get there by myself."

"Right, because you look real able at the moment," Bakugo sneers out and Hitoshi can imagine his eyeroll. "You're going to take one step outside and then fall into oncoming traffic, because you'll keel over any moment now and then you'll have traumatised some poor, unsuspecting citizens. Plus, someone’s gotta protect your mug, lest it get any uglier, so I'm only doing my job as a hero. It's a service to the public, really."

Hitoshi blinks several times, trying to digest all of that, but he gives up when his head starts to hurt.

There is one thing he takes away from all of this, though.

"Aww, I didn't know you cared," he says around a smile and he hears someone snort, probably Denki.

"I fucking don't, you idiot," Bakugo snaps and then hefts Hitoshi higher, before he starts to drag him off.

"Bye, Toshi!" Denki calls after him and Mina adds "Get some sleep!" before their voices fade in the background.

"Is this a kidnapping?" Hitoshi wants to know when Bakugo deposits him into a car seat and he thinks he might catch on fire from the intensity with which Bakugo glares at him.

"Do kidnappers usually take you home to sleep?" Bakugo inquires once he slid behind the wheel and Hitoshi hums in thought.

"Not typically, no. Is this—are you gonna crash the car then?"

"I would rather kill you with my bare hands than mess up the paint job on my car," Bakugo shoots back with a side glance and Hitoshi lolls his heard around until he can look at him.

He does make a very striking picture behind the wheel, but then again, Bakugo always does. That's kind of his entire thing.

"Hate how competent you are at everything," Hitoshi mutters under his breath. "Even bulling me into going home."

Bakugo outright laughs at that.

"If it makes you feel better, I work hard to be that competent."

"Even at taking me home?"

"I doubt it's going to be the last time, you're a fucking idiot like that, so there’ll be lots of opportunity for me to practice," Bakugo gives back, but his voice is softer than Hitoshi is used to and it's enough to almost put him to sleep.

He feels so cared for.

They don't speak for the rest of the ride home and Hitoshi only realises they have arrived when Bakugo punches his shoulder. He must have dozed off at some point.

"Oi, up you go, fucker," he cheerfully declares and Hitoshi barely manages to get his eyes open.

They burn and Hitoshi feels like crying because he's so damn tired and he knows it still won't be enough. The last mission is still hanging over him and he has been in this line of work for long enough to know that the nightmares won't let him sleep if he isn't unconscious.

Now, Yamada has argued often enough that unconsciousness doesn't equal rest, but Hitoshi just needs to reset his system once. He's not relying on unconsciousness forever, he just needs it this one time, and then his stupid brain will know that it's okay to fall asleep and then, maybe, he can get some real rest going forward.

"Are you deaf or just stupid?" Bakugo's cutting voice interrupts his musings and Hitoshi somehow manages to drag his eyes up to him.

"Tired," he slurs out and then falls forward, until his head rests on Bakugo's stomach.

"So let's get you upstairs so you can sleep in your bed and not propped up against me," Bakugo sighs out and Hitoshi must already be asleep, because there is no other explanation for the hand in his hair.

"'s not safe," Hitoshi mutters and feels how Bakugo sighs.

"I'm here, aren't I? It doesn't get safer than that," he gives back and maybe he's right.

Yeah, he has to be right, Hitoshi thinks, because Bakugo is one of the top three heroes and if he says it's safe then it must be.

"'kay," Hitoshi agrees and finally manages to get himself upright again, though he still has to lean very heavily against Bakugo.

"Last mission really fucked you over, huh?" Bakugo muses as they make their way up the stairs, slowly but surely, and Hitoshi nods.

"Was bad, nearly went completely off the rails."

It's barely an explanation, but Hitoshi doesn't have it in him to find more words and he's still not entirely convinced Bakugo even cares, despite the way he lugs his mostly uncooperative body up the stairs.

Bakugo probably treats this as training and then calls it a day. He won't ever think about this again and Hitoshi already knows that he'll never think of anything but this again. Bakugo is warm against him and for all that he pretends he doesn't care and couldn't be bothered to, he's still gentle and careful with Hitoshi and it's not something he would have expected.

"But it didn't and no one died," Bakugo says as he makes Hitoshi unlock the door to his apartment and he's too concentrated on getting the key into the hole to think about why the hell Bakugo would know that there hadn't been any casualties.

"Doesn't stop the—" he points at his temple once the door is open. "You know how it is."

"I do," Bakugo agrees and immediately moves towards the bedroom when Hitoshi points towards it.

He unceremoniously dumps him into the sheets as soon as it's in reach and Hitoshi doesn't have it in him to complain.

The bed is soft and he's finally in a horizontal position and Hitoshi's eyes slip shut without his permission.

"Thought so," Bakugo snorts out but Hitoshi still feels how the blankets are being pulled over him, and he'd almost call it sweet with how Bakugo tucks him in. He's just about to when Bakugo pushes his hand through Hitoshi's hair again and the last thing he hears before darkness finally claims him is "Sleep, I'm here. You're safe."

Hitoshi sleeps without nightmares that night.

~*~*~

Hitoshi wakes up completely disoriented. For long moments he doesn't know who he is, or where and least of all why and it takes him a good five minutes to remember his name and that he's currently at home.

He feels good; better than he has in ages and he has no clue how that comes to be. Hitoshi vows to figure that out, but first he needs something to drink. He rolls around in his bed, wondering if he's ready to leave it yet but when his gaze falls onto his side table, he realises that he doesn't have to.

There's a sports drink right there, waiting for him, sweetly calling his name, and Hitoshi downs the first half of it without tasting anything. It's only after that he realises it's peach flavoured, which happens to be his favourite.

"What the fuck," Hitoshi mutters, staring at the bottle in confusion.

He knows himself well enough to know that he certainly did not have the foresight to put it within reach and he's reasonably sure that he has never even brought one of these back home.

Hitoshi shrugs the mystery off and finally untangles himself enough to get up and stretch. He really feels good and he grabs for his phone to check just how long he's been asleep for and then he nearly drops it when the time hits him. It's Friday morning. And not even early morning, but like. Brunch time.

Hitoshi slept for well over fourteen hours and yeah, he definitely feels like it.

It's surprising to say the least, because he was prepared to wake up several times, maybe even be unable to fall back asleep should that happen, but for once in his life he slept through the night.

Well, nothing to do about it now, he decides and makes his way to the kitchen, his grumbling stomach reminding him that he needs to eat and fast only to let out the most unmanly shriek he can manage when a mop of ash-blonde hair turns into his direction and red eyes pierce him with their gaze.

"What the fuck!" Hitoshi yells out, hand clutching his chest and he fears his heart might just jump straight out and run away.

"Good morning to you, too," Bakugo says in the most condescending way he can manage and Hitoshi takes a moment to get his breathing back under control.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he asks once he's sure his voice will hold and Bakugo turns enough to sling an arm over the back of the couch.

"Listen, if you had died and the last person you were seen with were me, Sparky would murder me in cold blood," Bakugo says as if that makes any sense, as if he couldn't explode Denki before he even gets close.

"So what? You spent the entire night here?" Hitoshi asks and his eyes fall to the shirt Bakugo is wearing.

That is most definitely not what he was wearing yesterday afternoon.

"Don't be daft now, I went home."

"And then came back?"

"Yeah?"

"And broke my lock?"

"I took your keys, dumbass."

"Oh, because that's so much better," Hitoshi mutters and he doesn't understand what's going on.

He's craving coffee.

"There's a pot ready," Bakugo says with a nod towards the kitchen as if he can somehow read Hitoshi's thoughts and Hitoshi decides that this is a problem for after-coffee-Hitoshi.

After-coffee-Hitoshi has to face past-Hitoshi's problem way too soon, though, because there's indeed a pot of coffee ready and so it barely takes two minutes for him to be caffeinated.

Which reminds him of the sports drink that had been waiting for him.

"Hey," Hitoshi awkwardly says as he goes back into the living-room, cup of coffee clutched to his chest as if Bakugo might take it from him at any moment. "Why peach flavoured?"

"Cause it's your favourite, moron."

"How—how the hell do you know that?" Hitoshi demands to know because this entire interaction is completely catching him off guard and he has no clue what's going on, except that Bakugo is in his home, and he seems relaxed, and he made coffee for Hitoshi and he's not exploding his head off.

Hitoshi might still be asleep actually.

"What's my favourite flavour?" Bakugo shoots back instead of answering and Hitoshi answers without thinking much about it.

"You don't care about the flavour because you chug them like they are oxygen. I don't think you've ever tasted even one of them. You would never touch a cherry-flavoured one, because you hate that flavour in general," he answers and then goes slightly red in the face because he and Bakugo are nowhere near close enough for him to know that.

He just knows that because he's a creep with a crush and he has maybe been looking a little much.

"Yeah. That's how I know your favourite, too," Bakugo says, suddenly strangely guarded and it takes Hitoshi a moment to parse through his meaning but when he finally does he nearly drops his coffee.

Holy fuck, Bakugo Katsuki has been paying attention to Hitoshi.

This has to be a dream.

"You're leaving for overseas in two days," Hitoshi blurts out and he's going to blame all his blunders on the unusual feeling of being rested.

He's not used to that; clearly his body doesn't know how to handle it. It’s a good excuse.

"And that's why we're doing this fucking now," Bakugo snaps, and Hitoshi is delighted to see that he's embarrassed about something.

"You—what? Honestly thought I'd mind this,” Hitoshi awkwardly gestures between them, “and you could use those two weeks to pretend nothing happened? Bakugo, seriously, I've had the hots for you since our third year," Hitoshi admits and it's almost not mortifying at all to admit that, especially when Bakugo goes delightfully red in the face.

"You're so embarrassing," Bakugo snaps out and Hitoshi can only laugh in delight. "And besides. Distance makes the heart grow fonder, and all that crap."

"Oh, the heart is not the only thing that's going to grow with the distance," Hitoshi immediately shoots back, wiggling his eyebrows for good measure too and it takes Bakugo a moment but then he cracks up, laughing so hard he leans forward and Hitoshi thinks he might have never seen a more beautiful sight.

It takes Bakugo a while to compose himself again but Hitoshi is not complaining. He enjoys seeing Bakugo like this, relaxed and happy and in his home and so Hitoshi is going to stare as much as he pleases, thank you very much.

But Bakugo does grow serious eventually and he nods towards the kitchen.

"I also made food. Go get some, before you starve or whatever."

"You're being so mean to me, you shouldn't order me around when we only have like two days left," Hitoshi pouts, absolutely prepared to see how far Bakugo will let him push and he only pouts some more when Bakugo stares him down.

"So go get your goddamn food and then come the fuck here," he says, each word distinctly pronounced and it still takes a meaningful glance from Bakugo to the space next to him on the couch for Hitoshi to catch up.

"Oh. Oh! You want me to come cuddle up to you, yep, I'm on that, gimme a moment!" Hitoshi rushes out and hurries back into the kitchen, not listening to Bakugo's cries of outrage.

He stayed in Hitoshi's apartment, and he knows his favourite flavour of sport drinks and he made food so really, there is nothing Bakugo gets to complain about right now.

Hitoshi shoves his food into the microwave for approximately five seconds before he decides that he can eat it cold, too, and then he's back in the living-room, almost throwing himself on the couch and therefore right into Bakugo's space.

He grumbles some more but he does lean back and lift his arm to let Hitoshi cuddle real close and really, in this moment, it wouldn’t matter if Hitoshi was about to keel over dead.

It would be worth it for just this moment.

"Gods, would it kill you to not be a fucking caveman for a second and actually heat your goddamn food up like a normal person?" Bakugo wearily asks as he eyes the cold plate in Hitoshi's hands.

"Yes," Hitoshi says with his mouth full and grins when Bakugo pulls a face. "May I remind you that you wanted this?"

"May I remind you that you had an embarrassing crush on me for years?"

"It's you, there's nothing embarrassing about it," Hitoshi immediately gives back and he never thought Bakugo's face could go that soft, but he wants to see it more.

"Just eat, dumbass."

"Will you make me warm food eventually?" Hitoshi asks after a moment and Bakugo rolls his eyes.

"Yes, I'll cook for you when I come back from my mission."

Hitoshi doesn't waste a second.

"Great, it's a date."

[locustonlioden-blog]

Hazbin Hotel Episode Rewrites

Episode 1 (will be doing all of them)

Take out the “precious daughter” line. This makes no sense seeing how Lilith ditched the family and Lucifer is supposed to be super distant. We get 0 evidence these were involved, doting parents that put a bunch of effort into raising Charlie. Perhaps change it to “And now, its up to their precious daughter” meaning Charlie has taken it upon herself to mend things, instead of making it sound like she’s been coached all along for her role.

Adam and Lute are put off to find out its Charlie meeting with them, not Lucifer as usual. The meeting was arranged because of the very important matter of an exterminator angel being killed for the first time ever, and an important discussion was needed. Adam is much less a 1 dimensional comic relief dude bro.

“So, are you taking over extermination arrangements for now on?”

“Uh, no...actually, it was just kind of out of the blue that he told me about the meeting and asked me to come-”

(seriously, Lucifer supposedly didn’t know about the hotel, or at least he pretended not to, lets just assume he does but didn’t let on to Charlie that he’s watching her)

“Did he tell you why?”

“Ah, no-but, it was really convenient because you see, I have an idea that would actually END the need for exterminations-”

At this point Adam is seriously put off. They just found out demons can kill angels-this has to be a distressing revelation. Now of all times, the guy they have a serious deal with chooses to send someone who wants to talk about ENDING the exterminations? This would almost feel like a threat. So now they want out of the deal? No way! He would feel a need to reassert dominance and get things back under control. Who do these demons think they are? Cue their aggressive mocking and song, followed by throwing Charlie out as they do in the actual episode. He doesn’t even bother to explain why they are moving the extermination up. He’s not going to talk to Charlie. She has not established any sort of repertoire with him that makes him feel as though she is worth having an actual discussion with about a serious matter.

Commercial subplot: Alastor offers a deal to Vaggie in order to help make a successful commercial for Charlie.

“You’re insane, I’d never make any sort of deal with some shitlord

“Hm, such a pity, Charlie will be so let down to see how you fail to manage her project even a day without her. She has to do everything. Why are you even around? Do you really think the princess of hell needs physical protection from a sinner with a spear?”

*sighs* “You making the video for me isnt going to help that.”

“My dear, it wasnt raw power that bent all of Hells sinners to my will. You seem to know me quite well...(this is where we can reintroduce the Alastor lore Vaggie game to Angel Dust in the pilot, instead of waiting until the Mimzy episode to give anything) ...so you see, I have no problems getting things done, and I would be willing to teach you. Imagine what Charlie could achieve, and how much quicker, if she had a competent partner at her side…”

“I’m not making a deal! And you can have fun entertaining yourself with an empty hotel. Nobodys going to want to come to a place a powerful overlord like you so obviously takes as a joke”

“Well, I WILL make a worthy advertizement for the hotel, but I’m going to do it the RIGHT way, and do it for radio!”

She doesn’t make a deal here, but the seeds have now been sown. Her insecurity and feelings of inadequacy and worthlessness are gnawing. She has little feelings of self worth-would it be so bad to sacrifice herself in a deal with Alastor if it meant assuring Charlie achieves her dream? She is tempted.

Vaggie uses a little cunning here. While Alastor manipulates the inhabitants of the hotel to give fantastic line deliveries using a variety of amusing tactics, Vaggie secretly records with the video camera. At the end of the day, Alastor smugly announces that he has the radio ad all ready. When Charlie returns, Vaggie cuts in and says radio AND television ad! The ad then starts to play and is cut off by the news like in the actual episode. Alastor was initially amused she tried to make a tv ad anyway, but he sees enough to tell that she recorded him making the radio ad. His smile tightens, eyes narrow, and he fades off.

[ash-inabucket]

Um. hi. your fanart of Marcy waking up from a nightmare is probably my favorite piece of Amphibia fanart ever. curious what was going through your head when you made it. also what are your headcannons/thoughts about The Core, Marcy, what she experienced while under its control, and its lasting effects on her?

holy shit dude, thanks? i don’t know what i did to deserve all this nice stuff you’re saying, but thanks. also the tags on the reblog were not aggressive or mean or anything, they actually made me super happy to see! i’m really glad you like it.

coming back after writing all the stuff, there’s a lot so i’m putting a ‘keep reading’ thing. seriously there’s so much

what was going through my head… hm. it’s like, i imagine Marcy having lots of nightmares about things that happened to her, or things that could have happened, stuff like that. i’ve read a lot of fanfic so now i really like the idea of her clutching her shirt when remembering being impaled. or even just for comfort, to know that her weakest point is covered in moments of terror. also she’s crying. sobbing. the only times she recovers quickly after bad nightmares is when she’s with the others.

i really like the idea of the Core not only sticking her in a box in her mind, but also showing her things. like to keep her from trying to get out. can’t resist if your mind is shattered and devoid of hope! anyway i mean like using the illusions to show her various things, situations, people. more peaceful ones where she’s with her girls, only to realize they aren’t there. terrifying ones where they make her live through her worst memories, her betrayal (of her and by her), her death, her torture and possession. twisted situations where Anne and Sasha proclaim that they can’t be seen with her, they can’t trust her, even hate her for what she’s done. sometimes the Core sticks her in unending darkness so they don’t have to think of anything, or if they’re focused on something else and need her out of the way (this is where the thing about being unable to sleep or feel safe in complete darkness is from). sometimes they’ll make a fake scene where it seems as though she is being shown what her body is doing, she can see through her eyes, and then she hurts people. kills people. sometimes it will be real, but she doesn’t know that, and she will still hurt people. when whoever in the Core in charge of her is feeling particularly cruel, they’ll do a simulation of her being saved. rescued. freed. forgiven. she’s finally with her girls. but. she isn’t. she’s still here. of course they didn’t save her, why would they? she’s a horrible person, and she did so much unforgivable stuff? why would they ever want to save someone like her? (shit this is long, yeesh. well i’m having fun soo-) sometimes Anne and Sasha kill her as she’s possessed, because she needs out of the way, and her life doesn’t matter anyway. sometimes they free her and then take their fury at her out on her by hurting her.

recovery from that is incredibly hard. when she’s rescued, she doesn’t believe it. firmly denies it, hides from them, tries to keep them from hurting her, curls into a ball and refuses to acknowledge them. because they aren’t real, they aren’t. hasn’t she been through this enough? it takes the others a while to convince her she’s in reality, and that yes, they do really forgive her. she’s actually completely free.

later in life she has trouble discerning reality from her nightmares. she has insane trust issues. she can’t walk, not by herself. she’s terrified of fire, because fire is what impaled her, killed her, and fire is the color of the eyes that haunt her. a small zap of static electricity is enough to send her into a flashback of her possession, of the chair, of fire and lightning and code flowing into her, burning burning burning. once someone tried to calm her by grabbing her wrists, which only sent her further. the cuffs. they chained her down. she can’t move she can’t move! the color orange makes her nervous, if there’s too much of it she half convinced they’ve taken over somehow and tinted her vision the color of her nightmares. (looking at this you’d really think i’d be able to write something. i should write something) sudden complete darkness, such as someone turning off a light without warning, has her half believing whatever just happened wasn’t real, that the Core got bored and stuck her in the darkness. sound and small lights can help her come back to reality. sound because the Core wouldn’t let sound into their void, that would defeat the point! and small lights because if it all comes back quickly it just means the simulation has been turned back on. better to show her something small but concrete. Anne and Sasha have gotten really good at realizing when she needs a reality check, and then knowing her to ground her. (btw she doesn’t move away because i need her to have a support system. she might actually go crazy if she’s separated from her friends) ( whAT THE FUCk-?? this is so long! i need to wrap up! holy shiiiit) Marcy likes to hold their hands to help her remember where she is. physical touch is very grounding. the Core could never get it right so it’s even more so. after some nightmares she flinches from touch, so other things are needed, but once she’s returned from the hell in her mind she needs touch. sometimes weighted blankets help to ground her when she feels as though she might almost float away, sometimes they chain her down and trap her beneath the weight of all her mistakes.

there’s probably more, but if i kept going i’ll just have written a whole ass fic in an ask answer. hope you liked it! if not idk what i can give you (you’ll like it, because it’s great)

i don’t think i’ve ever written things out like things before, i should do that more. it helped to have specific questions, so thanks man i guess? heh.

[astro-nomaly]

@highbookwormofthecentury

Me when I get a chance to talk about Sword and Shield

Okay okay OKAY so this is my Sword and Shield Greenflower au where I completely make up Brad’s entire personality

Yap session time: so some things to start off: FSM is an actual literal God not just some fucking hybrid dude. He does that fanon thing where he makes Garm and Wu out of the golden power (they’re also twins in this). Anyways life happens (overlord isn’t. Really a thing? Like he exists but he’s more of that dick at the family reunion who spends the entire day drinking and then fucks off) Garm and Wu are demigods, which here means that they’re a) immortal unless killed with a VERY powerful weapon and b) cosmically powerful bc I said so. Anyway Garm ends up falling in love which everyone tells him not to do bc he WILL outlive her, but he still married Misako.

Now Misako can do Spinjitzu without an element which is supposedly impossible (elements are. Also a thing ig. Don’t ask me why FSM decided to start passing them out like party favors idk) and instead of lengthening her life like I did in TKAL, it’s too much for her body and she dies early. Garm doesn’t even really realize how much time passed from their meeting to marriage and deciding to have a kid since he doesn’t feel the passage of time the same way as mortals. They decided to ask FSM “hey can u do that golden power thing but with our dna” so now Garm is just standing her with a glowing demigod baby and dead wife

So he tries to be a chill dad for a while but his grief warps into this all-consuming hatred for mortals. It starts off as just avoiding them, finding them annoying, not letting Lloyd anywhere near them etc but eventually he starts going “genocide doesn’t sound too bad actually” (bro wasn’t even bitten by the GD 😭) and tries to steal the golden weapons. FSM has fucked off on vacation or smth by this point and left his kids in charge to take care of his realm while he’s out. Wu isn’t cool with genocide actually but is also too like. Divine? To really get the weight of Actual Genocide and just sees it as Garm throwing a tantrum. So instead of putting the guy in the realm of madness, he kicks his bro into the first realm to hang out with other Oni until he stops whining and takes Lloyd in to raise him.

Lloyd grows up with Wu, eventually the others show up for one reason or another and do missions or whatever not important point is he considers them family. And despite being a demigod he’s somehow still the baby of the family

Anyway Garm pops back in more genocidal than ever and with an Oni army. So obviously the ninja and Wu fight him and Wu tried to keep Lloyd out of it (bc like yeah he’s the green ninja but Garm’s his dad y’know). After too long tho Lloyd decided he can probably talk his dad down and they can just be a chill family together (lmao idiot). Garmadon is insane atp and does this crazy thing to Lloyd where he turns his kid into a fucking sword. Like. Literally takes the Sword of Sanctuary (FSM’s sword) and merges Lloyd with it. He does it bc he wants the green element for himself since it’s like the End All element

Wu steals Lloyd back, but can’t reverse whatever the hell Garm did to him, so he sticks his Sword Nephew in a monastery on the tallest mountain in the world and then just. Leaves him there. He doesn’t know what to do okay

Flash forward 50 years and Brad is living in a city constantly getting bombed, neither side has gained much ground, and he finds this weird scroll about magic swords in monasteries. So he climbs the mountain on a whim, as you do, and finds the sword and Lloyd. Lloyd turns out to be *gasp* an actual person. They decide to break the curse with the golden weapons and go on this whole cross-continental journey to find the damn things and then fall in love

Some stuff here for Plot: Lloyd being a sword comes with a lot of convoluted caveats specifically designed to limit his free will as much as physically possible, bc Garm is an insane piece of shit (I promise I love him just not here he gets better maybe)

So: the Wielder. Basically, if Lloyd is in Sword Form, whoever picks him up by the hilt automatically becomes the new wielder. Since this is basically Ella Enchanted this means: the Wielder controls whether he’s human or a sword (Lloyd cannot shapeshift on his own), the Wielder can physically force him to follow a command, and he can’t get too far away or he’ll automatically turn back into a sword. In Weapon mode, the Wielder can actually get him to turn into different kinds of weapons (anything handheld with a blade - no guns) to fight with.

Also, Lloyd’s powers (green element and Spinjitzu) are gone bc Wu did this thing to lock them up so no one could use them. Like not even Lloyd can use them and neither can the Wielder

And obviously Brad is the Wielder. They eventually get to the point where it’s a pretty mutual relationship and they’ve got this whole telepathic bond going on bc Brad is A Decent Person Who Doesn’t Treat Him Like Shit. In the finale Brad actually ends up using the green element with Lloyd bc he bagged a demigod it makes sense I SWEAR

And if all those rules sound convoluted and dehumanizing: that is the point. The whole story is really just about trust and personal autonomy. Lloyd has to trust Brad not to abuse the power he has over him, Brad has to trust that Lloyd actually cares about him, and the entire journey is so Lloyd can regain his autonomy, which Brad Does Not abuse. Like he literally refuses to turn Lloyd into a sword or order him around until Lloyd makes him bc bro you’re ab to die USE THE SWORD

There’s also a lot of hurt/comfort over the fact that Brad is Just Some Guy and Lloyd is this divine demigod who will outlive him several times over. Garmadon is actually so pissed that they’re in love lmao

Uhm. Ask me more ab this if you’re interested okay yap session over jfc