#dramatic lil bitch

[ye-olde-trojan-horse]

sirius has just sorta, inserted himself into my fic.

he wasn’t meant to be here much; a background character, there for vibes but not crucial to the plot.

but being the absolute queen he is, refuses to be ignored.

I love it when characters write themselves and give me absolutely no say in the matter /sar 🙄

[wombywoo]

sick bby 🤧

[middleearthwanderer]

Thorin really acting like he disliked Bilbo during The Unexpected Journey as if there wasn't tension started by him from the moment he laid eyes on the hobbit

dramatic bitch

[hikarry]

Btw, props to the people that work with David's hair in Good Omens, especially season 2

As someone with the same exact hair lengt of our fellow demon, Satan knows how fucking hard and annoying it is to defeat gravity and make the top part actually stay...up, ya know

Season 1 was not that hard cause his hair is considerably shorter, so: shorter hair is quite easier to get to stay up right

Longer hair tho

I pay tribute to all the hours I've spent with blowdryer in one hand and snapping my fingers with the other to try and perform some type of miracle, cause God damn (it does look hella sick when it works tho)

Anyway, all this to say: I have now concrete proof being sick and emulating Crowley DOES NOT MATCH

I've been laying here with a damp towel on my forehead in prayers it will somehow help break my fever and this bitch not only ain't helping, it has been sucking the red out of my hair for hours now and it has turned from white to pink

This virus I caught God knows how is literally sucking the vibe out of me

[luck-of-the-drawings]

OOH YEAH BABY! PARTY TIME BABY! MUSIC! DRINKS! SOCIAL PRESSURE & A PSYCHEDELIC BREAK DOWN! WELCOME TO VAMPIRE SOCIETY MOTHERFUCKER! ARE YOU SCARED? DO YOU UNDERSTAND YET? ITS OKAY IF NOT. FIRE DISSOLVED IT! ITS ALL GONE NOW. HAVE FUN!

[lunar-serpentinite]

draco: ill take care of you

harry: but it's rotten work

draco: well yeah duh but have you considered i won every annual How Well Do You Know Potter contest in the hogwarts potter forum for the entire time we've been in school

harry: the what now

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

do—

Do Howdy and Barnaby ever get together in your human au 🥺🥺

of course they do, who do you think i am

oh BOY do i have things to say about human!Laughingstock! im so unwell about them allow me to talk and talk and talk and ta-

~

so in this au they're like... the ultimate slowburn. their feelings for each other slowly simmer and grow over the course of *checks nonexistent watch* a lil over a decade i think. it's not very dramatic - just soft & silly w/ just a heap of pining and a pinch of angst for Flavor

it starts when they were teens - Howdy had a lil crush on Barnaby in middle school. and how could he not? Barnaby was cute, hilarious, and kind. at this point, they weren't friends! Barnaby knew Howdy's name, but only because they'd shared a school since elementary (as with 6/7 of the other neighbors) & speaking from experience, you just Know Those Names. Howdy slowly "grew out of" this crush, especially when the friend group started forming and he & Barnaby became actual friends.

that crush would fluctuate over the years. It starts out strong and then softens into just this hum in the back of Howdy's mind. always there, often easy to ignore, just... part of him, in a way.

Barnaby has a similar experience. when he and Howdy became friends, he got a lil crush - how could he not? Howdy was cute, laughed at all of his jokes and had a few of his own, and was endearingly eccentric. but at the time, Barnaby didn't recognize the crush for what it was. so he elected to ignore it until the crush dwindled to something easily manageable, something he wouldn't realize is still there. as with Howdy's, it'd never fully go away

and its noticeable enough to their friends that they'd all kinda side-eye how touchy Howdy & Barnaby are with each other (Barnaby is a physical guy, but damn. if Howdy is nearby they Will find a way to be touching at all times), the way they always laugh at each others jokes, the way they always ask "where's [x] / is [x] coming with" whenever the other is absent. but the group couldn't be sure if they were looking into it or not. it's too subtle. over time they get so used to it that they don't bat an eye - Howdy is Barnaby's best friend after Wally. of course they're close!

but then there's this one college party Howdy drags Barnaby to (and by extension, Wally). they're drunk off their asses, Wally's edible has kicked in, the party is pretty chill and everyone is having a decent time. all three of them are on the couch, and Barnaby and Howdy start drunk-complimenting each other. naturally, this feeds their mutual attraction, and one thing leads to another! they make out on the couch. naturally with Wally sandwiched between them, snacking on chips and committing the moment to memory (it's a surprise tool that'll help them later!) neither Barnaby nor Howdy will remember this

now, something i'd like to state for Barnaby in this au! he has had a lot of relationships - from one night stands to actually dating someone for months. sometimes the one night stands were a "he takes someone home after a date, & they leave while he's sleeping and ghost him" situation. with actual dating, the other person always breaks things off after a few weeks, if not days. it breaks Barnaby's heart a little bit every time. to the point where in his mid-20s, he just... stops dating. he avoids other people's advancements towards him, he always takes a friend with him to bars/etc as a buffer, he becomes an expert at gracefully turning people down

("why, pray tell" no one asks "do they always leave him? he's such a catch!" that he is! when he was in school, it was his friend group. he'd try to introduce his 'girlfriend' to his friends, and it'd be an immediate "eugh, you're friends with those freaks? no way!" as an adult, people found it off-putting how (by societal standards) unusually close he was with Wally. also, again, a "weird" friend group. they'd think it's too much, or just not their scene, or 'why don't you date your little blue haired boyfriend', etc. Barnaby never holds it against Wally or his friends. he has the mindset of if that person was the one, they would accept every part of Barnaby - and his friends are indeed part of him. Howdy has also dated around a little, but to a much lesser extent. he's too busy! he doesn't have time for that!)

but the ball really starts rolling in their late 20s. something the group does together - as a fun lil rare hobby - is LARPing. they get really into it! Sally made them all custom costumes, Julie helped make the weapons (like a giant sword for herself), etc etc. they fully commit to the bit (even Frank <3). so at this event's point in the timeline, Eddie is fully integrated into the clique, but that's unimportant - just to show where we are!

so they're all doing their thing, it's a pretty big LARP event - there's always way more people than our dear neighbors, yk. they're just part of the crowd! & there's a big battle hosted, the group is split between teams, but Barnaby & Howdy are on the same side! yay! during the battle, Barnaby is "mortally wounded." Howdy half-drags him away from the main battle under the cover of their teammates (including Eddie and Julie) and sits him down by the tree. now, Howdy & Barnaby are the ones who get into the roleplay the most. they get lost in the sauce! they perform the hell out of everything they do!

& since Barnaby is "dying", he really acts like it. Howdy acts accordingly, but again, they get a little too emotional, a little too into it, a little lost in the sauce. genuine tears are in their eyes, Howdy's voice is genuinely shaking a little as he holds Barnaby in his "dying moments" (Barnaby is holding the sword between his arm and his side. he has ketchup on his armor.) Eddie and Julie are getting choked up just watching this happen. and as Howdy & Barnaby look into each others' tear-filled eyes, those little feelings that have been so quiet for so long come right back babey! full force! but then they all get hit with "arrows" and have to die right there and then, and the moments over. but! both Barnaby & Howdy walk away from this LARP session grappling with Partially Realized Feelings.

Barnaby struggles with this the most, since yk at this point he's sworn off dating. he's being careful with his heart! but when he tells Wally all of this, cause he tells Wally everything, Wally's like "oh. yes, i know! remember that one college party where you two kissed for an hour". and then he goes on to point out every instance where he's thought "right, Howdy and Barnaby are in love" (bc Wally is way more observant than he lets on! he saw that shit! his peepers were peepin!)

BUT IT'S STILL A SLOW BURN BABEY!

Barnaby and Howdy don't approach each other about this. they're both in the boat of "well, i'll just keep going and see what happens" to the point where they're practically dating without ever saying anything to each other. Howdy notices how Barnaby lingers around the store more. Barnaby notices how Howdy keeps turning up at his work to talk more. (they already chat so much...) but they still! dont! say! anything! but they both Know! they're not emotionally circling each other they are Dancing to their Own Music!

and Barnaby is letting himself believe that this can work because, well... Howdy already accepts him as he is. Howdy is part of the group. Howdy loves Wally just like the rest of em. Howdy has seen Barnaby at his (presumed) worst and didn't even flinch! as for Howdy, well, he just thinks this is right! his whole life no one has really caught his eyes or heart, but Barnaby is different. he's always been in Howdy's peripherals. it feels natural to love him so deeply. Barnaby slots into his life like the final piece of a puzzle!

there's a lot of stuff that happens in this inbetween state - Howdy's store burns down & almost takes him with it, there's some family drama that needs to be handled, The Crash happens, etc etc etc - so it's a while before they "actually" get together. but they're both patient! they've waited this long, even if they didn't know they were waiting. neither of them are in a rush. they're young. they have time.

[but-aint-this-texas]

guyyyys I'm dyyyyinggggggg

my ailment is common cold and my fate is eternal darkness

yall best help me write my will

because at this rate I won't need a chrismukkah list....

[blonde-tori-spring555]

ugh i hate when i feel on the verge of a panic attack

imma rant for a sec soz, u dont have to read the whole thing

...

im just so stressed rn, with school, family, friends and ive got like two auditions i need to prepare for and tbh i just feel anxious for no reason, i feel like im getting 'bad' again, like were i was just in my room and doing the same thing everyday and my brain hated that, and i just felt numb, like i dont think im depressed or anything like idk, i feel like i should explain what happened to originally make me feel like this, i wont go into full detail ect, but yeh

basically i was friends with this girl (we met at performing arts classes) and she i guess never rlly treated me amazing and was always slightly werid for example (not saying this is weird but from the way she is irl and they way she sounded seemed strange) so last year i was facetiming her and i was like "oh btw ive got a bf now", and she kinda seemed a bit Awkard, like her smile faded and she was just kinda like "oh thats great for u" a bit numbly (i should probs mention she isnt straight and for all ik she is bi) and then instantly changes the subject to "oh btw i was thinking of asking out-" and yeh we talked about it, anyway i spoke to my mum how i thought it was a bit weird and my mum said "oh hahaha maybe she has a crush on u" and im (pretty sure im) straight so like i didnt know how to react, anyway fast forward she started to act rlly weird and yeh, like kinda being a bit dramatic about stuff, anyway one week, this was in October, i didnt rlly text her because i was rlly busy, i was hanging out with my school friends and stuff, and i wanna say she could of text me and i would of responded, maybe not right away but i would of told her i was a bit busy if she had asked, but no, one of our friends told us she was upset that i hadnt been texting her and that i should, yk so i did, and she didnt respond, then she left our performing arts gc (with our friends in it from there) so i asked her why and two days later she responded saying she felt she didnt fit it, and at this point i was kinda sick of this drama so i was by choice not gonna text her for a few days and take care of myself, then one day while at school she send me a fucking video (like a capcut edit) basically calling me and my friends from theatre bad friends, and saying i need to send it to them, anyway i didnt and we told the woman that owns our company, and btw my mum knew the whole time, from when she started acting strange, and my mum was saying to the woman that owned the company, that she will call the poice if needed and if it has been sent out and posted (the video had my face in it), then she text me calling my mum stupid and calling me stupid so i blocked her, and after that i told her we are not friends and to leave me alone, then in December i repeated we are not friends but im not sitting here being pissed anymore so like forget about the shit and move on BUT WE ARE NOT FRIENDS, anyway this bs has been dragged on for like 5-6 months and she fucking keeps harassing me to the point ive had to block her on all platforms. anyway yeh :)

[givemewallywestorgivemedeath]

Dudes chill

They're just dramatically monologuing into the middle distance. Don't be weird about it

[mossterious]

Every time I see characters that are messy and tragic my brain immediately goes “PUT THEM IN A MERRILY AU RIGHT NOW”

[fanficlerontheroof]

stay with me on this one:

macaque stealing everyones food and calling it an offering to the dead

[angelbunproductions]

My local Arby's just combined the best thing with the worst thing.

Behold!

👎Dr. Pepper flavored sparkling water👎

[bisexual-ashe]

elizabeth caledonia ashe is rotting my brain

[yeehawgeek]

sometimes i think “oh i’m not actually disabled bc i dont have any physical disabilities” and then remember that normal people don’t go into fight or flight mode because there are a few too many people at work

[ghost-proofbaby]

I think Eddie forgot to hang up can you confirm or deny this please it’s crucial

c’mon guys, that would be too easy of a reveal to the gang about this all. i thrive in chaos and that isn’t chaotic enough for me 👀