#dr. tremor

[vaingloriousvex]

[ID: two versions of a drawing of Dr. Tremor, a Ducktales oc belonging to @foggyglow. Dr. Tremor is a blue jay with eyes like the aperture of a camera, a robotic left arm with blue lightning crackling out of their palm, and a very smug smirk. They're wearing goggles, a brown short-sleeved shirt, dark pants, and a pair of pink earrings shaped like erlenmeyer flasks.

The first image is the image's proper colours, mostly a blue and purple theme. The second image is a photo taken under blacklight to show the glowing effects of the eyes, earrings, and belt buckle, as well as the variation in colour of the lightning effects. /END ID]

this was such a fun commission to work on! if you'd like a piece of your own, check out my info here!

[fruit-snacker]

You know i think I'll inflict my tremors on pepper ii next (cuz she's a pepper SHAKER lol) but also because pepper shaking to the point of her hands being basically unusable feels so incredibly correct to me. Also her shaking when she's emotional (or getting emotional when she's shaking) feels real too

[nightmaremp]

Muppet Monster Adventures:

The Graboid

[raurquiz]

#remembering #bibibesch #actress #carolmarcus #startrek #thewrahofkhan #steelmagnolias #tremors #thedayafter #doingtimeonmapledrive #falconcrest #dynasty #thebeastwithin #MurderSheWrote #whosthatgirl #woundedheart #DrQuinnMedicineWoman #er #melroseplace #CaliforniaMyth #startrek58

[thestormypetrelofcrime]

when I share my concerns why is it the people who have had close experience with neurological disorders offer condolences and support while the people who have not had close experience with neurological disorders are like “oh don’t worry about Parkinson’s/MS! you’ll be fine, anyway don’t you want to get better?”

[hanasnx]

SQUIRTING — s.reid

“ i love how you touch, how you feel, how you breathe / baby, how you do it so good? ” 🪽

MINORS DNI 18+ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ ✉️ | criminal minds. NOTES. never seen one single episode of criminal minds but i did miss my mutual @ddejavvu’s bday last october and wanted to make up for it. WARNINGS. fem reader ノ established relationship ノ potentially ooc spencer ノ fem squirting ノ pussy eating & orgasm mentions ノ vaginal fingering ノ explicit sexual content ノ praise kink (f receiving) ノ squirt obsessed spencer ノ lowkey unedited.

Don’t be fooled by SPENCER REID’s calm demeanor and harmless facade. Don’t get caught up in that little smile he does when he has nothing further to say, or the way his fluffy hair flops over his forehead when he inclines down to lend you an ear to hear you better. Don’t let your guard down when he info dumps his latest fascination, having traversed the rabbit hole of complex animal mating cycles or the latest scientific observation of quarks. Dr. Reid is no one to be underestimated.

You should’ve known better than to think of him as disarming and therefore “harmless.” It’s the first time in a long time that you’ve been so wrapped up in a guy, coming up for air rarely while you’re practically living at his place. Your clothes are strewn about his apartment, your favorite shampoo is in his shower, he bought you your own toothbrush to keep on your shelf in his medicine cabinet. Oh, it’s bad. There’s no turning back now. You’re completely and utterly helpless. If you could go back in time to warn your past self of the madness you’re about to endure…

“C’mon, baby, one more. Can’t you do one more?” it’s a plea devoid of any doubt, he can feel the way you’re pulsing around his fingers. It’s the familiar rev that quakes just before a big release, and his knuckles know the tremor intimately. That brain isn’t just used for his job, it’s memorized every part of you—even the parts you thought you weren’t ready to share.

You writhe, desperately nuzzling the back of your head into the mattress, heating up from the friction. Gritting your teeth, your body feels like it’s on fire, and the build in your gut is like something’s being taken from you. It’s a merciless pace completed by three of the longest fingers you’ve ever had inside of you, bullying your insides relentlessly prodding that spongy spot to chase a most coveted reaction. Your muscles contract and stretch, lifting your pelvis from the pillow he set it on like it’s demanding more. It’s a primal instinct, involuntarily rocking into his ramming in tandem. Your eyes squeeze shut from the pain of it, and yet you can’t stop.

“I can’t do it- I can’t do it, Spenc—ah!” you interrupt your own rebuke, your nails clawing into the purchase of the sheets as your spine goes limp. He doesn’t miss a beat, following you down to keep battering your soft tissue in just the right curl. Your tailbone has collapsed back onto the puddle of wetness, it’s cold to the touch, but you can’t even focus on how jarring the difference in temperature is right now.

You breathe like you’re readying for something, you pant like you’re in danger. Your chest rises and falls with rapid puffs of air, a sheen of sweat coating your skin—you can’t take this anymore.

Mesmerized, Spencer watches your poor pussy swallow his hand up. The wet squelching of leftover cream spatters out with every visceral plug, and his tongue forms over his upper lip to keep it busy. Your little clit calls out to him, he can feel it between his lips already. All soft and gooey, puffy and overstimulated, running between his spit-soaked lips as you scream from the two forces working together to make you cum. Not this time, he thinks, it’s not that kind of thing this time. His other hand grasps his cramping wrist, using it to cram into you faster, those three fingers forming a cone inside you to stroke the tips against the roof of you, and you cry out.

You reach for him, you try to grip anything you can, anything to get him to let up—to get him to stop. Mercy, you want. “You can, sweetheart, you can. I know it.” Sweat beads his forehead as he consoles you, letting you howl it out until he’s satisfied.

Miraculously, you manage to focus your efforts on one task. You lift your head, the prettiest and most pitiful upturn in your brows silently beckons him. It’s a silent request regardless of the noises whimpering out of your nose, you sound like a whining puppy while you make grabby hands at him. He knows what you want. Carefully, he adjusts so as to not upset the angle of his entry, but honoring your wish. Ignoring the burn of effort in his shoulder, he lays his head on your chest, and your legs suspended on either side of him bob from how hard he’s still fingering you. Your arms encase him, holding him close, clutching on for dear life as he finally tips you over that edge. There’s a change, the subtlest of tenses in your abdomen, like the tickle of pepper under a nose to attract a sneeze. You seize up, your cunt clenches down like a vice, and it idles. It’s the suspense at the top of a roller coaster.

“Oh, yeah… Oh, yeah, baby. That’s it. That’s it, uh-huh.” It’s a babble you can barely hear over the roaring in your ears, finally gushing out a hot spray. Your pussy becomes a fountain, squirting a mile high like you’ve been holding it in this whole time. It comes from deep within you, a secret stream only he can lovingly coax out. You had no idea there was anything even left in you, and yet Spencer’s patience can simply outlive your doubts, determined to wring every last drop out of you.

You can’t open your eyes, you can’t stop the earthquake in your legs, and your claws dig into his scalp. The noises you make are matched by him, groaning in maddened relief and joy at what he’s accomplished. It gets everywhere, drenching the front of his clothes as it pours down. The bed frame and the carpet and the furniture behind him are rained on, and there’s not a single thought in his mind of regret. Your abdomen flexes, pushing out every wave in pulses until it fizzles out. His hand slows, your breathing evens out, and your locked up body begins to relax muscle by muscle. He peels himself out of your hold, your limp limbs unable to put up any fight to keep him cuddled up on you. Lazily, your head lulls in his direction, eyes peering at him reverently stroke his palms over your puddle on the bed. All the releases he took from you perfectly layered on his navy blue sheets. His slack jaw encapsulates his awe at his handiwork, meeting your gaze with a brazen emotion nothing short of pride.

@HANASNX 2025 | do not copy, plagiarize, or steal.

[aquaholicsanonymousworld]

Your overprotective boyfriend Dr. Jack Abbott

Jack Abbott doesn’t realize he’s being overprotective at first. To him, it’s just instinct. He watches the exits of every restaurant you go to, always makes you walk on the inside of the sidewalk, and checks the locks on your apartment windows like it’s second nature. It’s not possessive—it’s protective. Quiet, calculated, and constant.

You notice it the most at night. He can’t sleep unless he knows you're home safe. If you’re working late or out with friends, he doesn't bombard you with texts, but you can always feel his eyes flick to his phone every five minutes until you send the “home safe” message.

If you work at the hospital too, he starts doing "casual" walkthroughs of your department, even when he’s not scheduled there. He’ll pretend it’s coincidence, but his eyes scan you like he’s checking for bruises no one else would notice. If you're in a dangerous case or with a combative patient, he’s there fast—and no one questions it. No one dares.

His paranoia peaks when something triggers him—like an overhead page that sounds too much like a siren, or a security breach. He pulls you aside, jaw tight, eyes distant like he’s somewhere else entirely. You have to remind him gently that you’re okay, that it’s not the field anymore.

But he never fully believes it. Not when it comes to you.

His overprotectiveness shows in small moments too—putting his hand on the small of your back in crowds, crossing to your side when a stranger gets too close, instinctively stepping in front of you during arguments, even if you’re the one doing the yelling.

He keeps a go-bag in his trunk. You find it once—fully packed. “Old habits,” he says. But there’s a second toothbrush. And your allergy meds. And your favorite protein bar.

When you ask about it, he just shrugs. “If something ever happens, I’m getting you out first.”

Jack doesn’t say “I love you” often, but his body does. In the tension of his shoulders every time you leave the room. In the way he memorizes your routes home. In the near-invisible tremor of his hand when he cups your cheek after a hard shift—like he still can’t believe you’re here, and safe, and his.

And every now and then, when the walls come down, he’ll whisper it like a prayer against your skin: “I couldn’t protect everyone back then. But I’ll protect you. Always.”

[science-hoes]

A Ray of Fucking Sunshine

Michael “Robby” Robinavitch x Reader

Warnings: patient violence, needles, injury, HIV mention, Santos

A/N: I literally cannot stop writing about this old man omg. But I love him. And he is a Good Man. Just some good fluff between an attending and his resident.

—

“I need a doctor!” A voice emerged from one of the exam rooms. “Please, I need a doctor!”

You looked up from your computer and over to Dana, who rolled her eyes. “Is it my turn?” You asked with hesitation.

The Pitt had been flooded as usual, and one of the psychiatric admissions was still being boarded in an exam room until a bed was available upstairs. Fred, the middle-aged opioid addict, was currently going through withdrawals, and he made sure everyone on the floor was aware. You felt bad for him because you know addiction is not entirely the fault of a patient, but Fred was verbally abusing every person who walked through the curtain to check on him.

Dana chuckled and walked over to your chair. “You’re up to bat, champ.” She patted you on the shoulder. “Think you’ll need backup? I can go in with you.”

You sighed and rubbed the aching dark circles under your eyes. “Not if he’s restrained. I’ll be fine.” You mumbled, kicking back on the floor so your chair rolled away from the desk.

You swung your stethoscope around your neck and walked through the curtain. There was Fred. He came in with tremors and sweats, but the withdrawal medication seemed to be helping for now. “Hey, Fred. I’m Dr. (L/N). What’s going on?” You asked, taking a seat on the stool next to the bed.

Fred shook his head. “No, I don’t want a fucking nurse. I want my doctor!” He screamed.

You squinted at his loud voice. “Sir, I am a doctor. Now, how can I help you?” You asked again, with the same patience as before.

“Give me my fucking medicine right now, bitch. I’m not playing any games.” He growled.

You moved to the computer to look up his chart. “I think Dr. Langdon already gave you medicine about thirty minutes ago. What symptoms are you having?” You replied calmly, not taking his anger to heart.

“I want my fucking pills.” He hissed, struggling against the fabric restraints tied to the gurney.

You turned to look at him and sighed. “I’m sorry, sir. I can’t do that for you.” You turned back to the computer to search for the time on his next medicine. “I know you are feeling really bad right now, but the pills will not help you in the-”

You were cut off by your head being yanked back by your hair with strong force. You let out a startled scream and twisted around to look at Fred. He had gotten out of one of his arm restraints, and before you could cry out for assistance, you felt pressure on your cheek. Naturally, your eyes squinted shut when you saw a hand coming at you, so you didn’t see that he was wielding a scalpel. Before you could open your eyes, a closed fist knocked you to the ground.

“I told you to give me my fucking pills, you cunt.” He snarled and spat on you.

The curtain swung open to reveal Langdon and Robby, who both looked ready to tackle Fred if he was free. You crawled away from the bed and shakily stood up.

“Dana, call for security!” Robby yelled out as he and Langdon grabbed Fred’s free arm and tried to tie it back down to the rails of the bed. The metal clang of the scalpel dropping to the tile fell deaf on your ears.

You ran out of the room as a security guard bumped into you, causing you to stumble. Luckily, Dana was there to catch you. “Hey, I’ve got you.” She assured you. But then she stood you up straight, seeing red streaks on your face and dripping to your neck. “Oh, holy shit.”

You felt numb. Numb to everything. Even the pain in your face couldn’t bring you back to reality. “I just…” You mumbled, looking around. All of the nurses and doctors had their eyes on you. It was overwhelming, and the fluorescent lights started to burn your eyes.

And then your cheek began to hurt. The pain seeped across your face, and hot tears pricked your eyes.

You didn’t even realize that Dana had snatched gauze from a patient’s room. She pressed it to your cheek firmly. “Collins, get over here!” She called out.

You sat down in the chair you had abandoned only two minutes before. Collins ran over to you and tilted your head up with a gentle hand.

“Oh, sweetie, what happened?” She asked sincerely, lifting the gauze delicately.

You winced as fresh air hit the cut. “I don’t know. I think he hit me. And he pulled my hair.” You responded, still in shock.

Collins winced at the wound and replaced the gauze. “I don’t know, that looks like a pretty deep cut.”

Before long, the med students and interns surrounded your chair. You reached a hand to your cheek and carefully pulled the gauze away, finally seeing how much blood had flooded the cloth.

“Oh, shit. That definitely needs stitches.” Santos commented.

If you could roll your eyes, you would have. But you were focused on not puking your guts out in front of the team.

“I shouldn’t have turned my back to him.” You mumbled.

Mohan shook her head. “No way. That is not your fault. Sure, never let a patient get between you and the door. But you shouldn’t have to keep eyes on the patient at all times to ensure your safety.” She redirected.

You closed your eyes, but you could hear others agreeing with her. The pain and attention was too much to handle. You just wanted to be alone. So, you stood slowly. Dana held a hand to your back as you did.

“What do you think you’re doing?” She asked. “You might need a CT.”

You looked to her sluggishly. “I just need some air. I’m just going to the empty room.” You said before quickly escaping from the crowd.

You swished the curtain open and shut. The light above the bed was out, perfect for some peace and quiet. You sat on the bed and crossed your legs. The pain from your cheek was becoming more unbearable by the second as the adrenaline wore off. You closed your eyes and pressed the gauze harder against your skin.

You were incredibly embarrassed. Maybe you were too naive. Fred had a history of violence toward healthcare workers, and you still turned away from him. Trusting him as innocently as a child would. It wasn’t the first time that you underestimated a patient. Langdon always chastised you for being too trusting.

The curtain opened, and you could see the light from the Pitt through your closed eyes. “Dana, please let me have a minute.” You begged.

“I think she’s already given you two minutes.” Robby’s voice responded.

You opened your eyes, and you saw Robby standing in the doorway with a suture pack in his hands. “Oh. I’m sorry, Dr. Robby.” You responded, slightly embarrassed.

Robby smiled and shut the curtain behind him. “No need.” He said and stood over the bed. “Why don’t you let me see what we’re working with?” And tapped your hand holding the gauze.

You moved your hand away from your face and winced. “It’s fine. Just stings a little.” You lied through clenched teeth.

Robby chuckled and shook his head. “No, ma’am. That’s gonna need at least five stitches.” He said.

You watched him move to the side of the room and grab a syringe of lidocaine and some more gauze. He turned the overhead exam light on, and you furrowed your brow at the brightness.

“Are you okay?” He asked as he sat down on the bed next to you. He titled your chin up and began patting down your neck with the extra gauze, cleaning the blood that had dripped from your cheek.

Honestly, you weren’t okay. You felt like you had been taken advantage of, but you didn’t lose anything besides your pride. And a few precious minutes of charting. You felt silly for thinking that a hostile patient wouldn’t lash out at you, even though he had screamed at someone as sweet as Mel King. You felt the tears prick your eyes again, and your bottom lip quivered.

Robby stopped cleaning your face as soon as he met your eyes. “Oh, no. Sweetie, please don’t cry.” He begged and tilted your head back. “The tears are gonna make the cut hurt even more. Just wait for me to inject the lidocaine.” He said.

You swallowed thickly, taking in shaky but deep breaths. You felt his hand grab one of yours and squeezing tightly. “I’m sorry.” You managed to whisper.

Robby made quick work of the cleanup and grabbed the lidocaine syringe. He pulled his black-rimmed glasses out of the pocket of his scrub top and placed them on the bridge of his nose. “Don’t apologize, dear.” He let go of your hand to place his on under your chin to stabilize your head. “Okay. I’m about to inject the lidocaine, and it’s going to burn like hell for a few seconds.” He warned, peering over his glasses to meet your gaze.

You saw the syringe in his hand. The needle wasn’t that big. You knew that. You gave the same injection to patients every shift. But as the needle slowly moved closer to your face, your breathing hitched, and you pulled away from his grasp.

“No, no, I can’t.” You struggled to say through labored breaths.

Robby held his hands up, as if to show you that he wasn’t going to make a sneak attack with the syringe. “(Y/L/N). Look at me. Look at my eyes.” He said, lifting his glasses to rest on the crown of his head.

And so you did. His dark chocolate eyes were framed with permanent laugh lines. Even when he was in a pissy mood, he would smile with sarcasm or exasperation. You didn’t even realize that your breathing had slowed as the silence grew between you. Robby placed the lidocaine syringe on the tray next to the bed, but never broke eye contact.

“Tell me what’s going through your mind.” He said.

You didn’t answer immediately. It almost seemed like a trap. Admitting your insecurities and shortcomings to your boss that he could use as leverage or blackmail whenever he saw fit. But something about his face seemed sincere and almost…worried.

“I’m just…embarrassed. Overwhelmed.” You whispered, finally admitting it out loud.

Robby nodded. “Okay. Those are reasonable feelings to have after an event like that.” He affirmed. “Do you want to talk about it?”

You shook your head. “No. I’m sorry for being a bitch about the lidocaine. I’m ready now.” You said quickly.

Robby reached for the syringe again and placed a hand under your chin. “Okay. I’m going to make a few injections around the cut. It’ll be over before you know it.” He said and tilted his glasses back down.

You closed your eyes and waited. The needle inserting wasn’t painful, but the lidocaine burned like a motherfucker. You furrowed your brow, trying not to scrunch your face in pain.

“That’s a good girl.” Robby praised as he inserted the needle into your skin again.

Oh. That wasn’t something you expected to hear from him. You opened your eyes to see Robby meticulously moving the needle around your cheek, his mouth open just slightly in concentration. You hoped that your face had already been flushed from the anxiety and pain because you could definitely feel the heat rising up your neck. Suddenly you realized just how close Robby was to you. Even while you both sat at the edge of the bed, he was all but cradling you as he worked.

“And done. How does it feel?” He said, snapping you out of your thoughts.

You raised a hand to your cheek and pressed gently. “Oh. I don’t feel anything.” You said, huffing a small laugh.

“Great. That means I can start sewing you up.” He said.

Robby opened the suture kit and began to sort out its contents. You watched him grab the utensils he needed and the suture thread. “Thank you for doing this.” You said.

He turned back to you, ready to start suturing away. “It's the least I can do. I’m upset that one of my residents got attacked under my watch.” He responded, inserting the suture needle. But you didn’t feel it. “After this, I’m gonna write you a prescription for a PEP antiretroviral and do some blood tests.”

Your eyes widened. “For HIV?”

Robby met your eyes for a moment before looking back to your cheek. “Yes, Dr. (Y/L/N). Fred is HIV positive. And while we don’t think the scalpel he cut you with had his own bodily fluids on it, your health comes first. We have to treat because of the risk, even though it’s slim to none.” He explained.

Your heart fell to your stomach, and the tears that you managed to hold back before began to spill over your eyes. “I’m so fucking stupid.” You breathed.

Robby pulled tightly on a suture before beginning the next one. “Hey. Don’t talk like that.” He said. “This is not your fault.”

Your lip quivered, and you looked to the ceiling to try and stop more tears. “Langdon is right. I’m fucking naive. I shouldn’t have ever turned my back to Fred. I knew what he was capable of.”

Robby sighed heavily and tied off the last suture. He placed the instruments back on the metal tray. But then he grabbed one of your hands and lifted his glasses with the other. “You are a good doctor, (Y/N). You are not naive. You are one of the last good people around here.” He said honestly.

Your cheeks flushed again, but you shook your head. “I need to start thinking more like Langdon, like Santos, like…like you.” You said.

Robby frowned, almost in disappointment. “I don’t want you to ever be like me. You are a ray of fucking sunshine, and you make everyone around you smile. Even me.” He said. “As soon as you walk in the room, it gets brighter.”

You smiled slightly. “I can make you smile?” You asked shyly.

Robby chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck, looking down at his feet. “Yeah. Yeah, you do.” He replied. “Sometimes you’re the only good thing about my day. The days where you’re off and I’m here…those are a lot darker.”

You watched your attending fidget with his hands in his lap nervously. You placed one of yours over them. Robby looked up to you, and you felt a real connection this time, deeper than holding each other’s gaze. He held your small hand in both of his.

“Well…you’re making a really shitty day turn into a good one.” You said.

Robby smiled, and the laugh lines around his eyes crinkled. You didn’t realize how close the two of you had naturally inched towards each other until you could feel his breath on your nose and smell his scent. A mixture of coffee and what had to be Old Spice deodorant.

You weren’t sure who leaned in first. But Robby’s lips pressed against yours in a sweet, gentle kiss. His nose brushed against yours, nuzzling your uninjured cheek. You grinned at the feeling of his mouth peppering small kisses across your face.

“Does this make it better?” He asked in between little kisses.

You placed a hand on his neck, fingers reaching up to stroke his hair. You finally pressed your forehead against his to catch his eyes. “All better, Dr. Robby.” You said before giving him another kiss.

[thepencilnerd]

Not Enough

"And I don't know how many people I've helped today, but I can tell you every other person who has died." pairing: Dr. Michael “Robby” Robinavitch x F!Doctor!Reader summary: Still in the thick of the hospital’s response to the mass casualty event, Robby is fracturing under the weight of it all. You’ve both seen too much. And tonight, it’s your turn to hold him together. warnings: descriptions of violence, blood, panic attacks, grief, mentions of death a/n: because this show has me in a chokehold and noah wyle at the end of 1x13 broke me. p.s. also check out my other Dr. Robby fics (And Through It All | Feels Like Trouble)

As soon as the mass email came, you rushed out from your apartment and sprinted to the hospital. The moments are seared into your memory—the trauma bay full of bodies, the sharp smell of iodine mixed with blood, a teenager’s hoodie torn open beneath your hands as you searched for the source of the bleeding.

You remember the small hand that slipped out of yours as the patient began coding. 

The parents screaming for their children. 

The quiet ones were somehow worse, never fully there but not all the way gone. 

The muffled chaos from the pit beyond the glass door are the only real sounds. Alarms, voices—frantic and fatigued—bleed through in faint, distorted waves, like a war raging just out of reach. It’s distant, but not far enough to forget

You got the text while changing out of your blood-soaked scrubs, hands still trembling as you peeled the fabric away from your skin. It clings to you anyway—in your hair, your skin, the backs of your eyelids every time you blink. With blood still drying on your sleeves and the adrenaline long gone, you closed your eyes to breathe in a moment of quiet when your phone buzzes four times.

Hey I know you keep things quiet but Robby’s not okay.

He broke down in front of Jake.

He’s falling apart.

He needs you.

You find him in peds, cowering in the far corner like he’s trying to disappear. The room is cold—refrigerated, sterile—and smells faintly of antiseptic, sweat, and the awful tang of blood that never quite leaves. You recognize the scent of grief and aftermath of trauma hanging in the air like smoke.

One of the gurneys near the wall is still streaked with drying blood, its sheet half-pulled back like someone had to leave in a hurry. A pair of tiny shoes sits on a tray nearby, splotched red, forgotten, out of place, obscene in their stillness.

He’s on the floor, curled in on himself, arms wrapped tightly around his knees. He’s sobbing—ragged, uncontrollable, like something vital inside him has broken loose. His chest heaves as he tries and fails to breathe through it, and you can hear the panicked gasps, the wet hitch in his throat, the tremors rattling his whole body.

This isn’t just grief—it’s a full-blown panic attack. And he’s drowning in it. 

He’s curled in tight, arms wrapped around his knees, body rocking slightly as if the motion might keep him from falling apart completely. His eyes are wide, but unfocused—bloodshot and glassy, locked somewhere far away. He’s still gasping, each breath too shallow, too fast. His hands are shaking violently, fingers digging into his own sleeves like he’s trying to anchor himself to the fabric.

You take a step closer, voice barely above a whisper. “Robby?”

His head jerks up at the sound of your voice, eyes wide and disoriented like he’s just surfaced from underwater. He blinks at you, breath still catching, and it takes a second for recognition to flicker through the haze.

“Did Dana call you?” he asks hoarsely.

“No,” you say softly, taking careful steps towards him. “She texted.”

He lets out a dry sound—not quite a laugh. "Figures."

You kneel beside him. The air is heavy, dense with everything he’s not saying yet. Slowly, you reach out and take one of his trembling hands in yours. His fingers twitch, then tighten, clinging to you like a lifeline. The squeeze is weak at first, then firmer—as if just the touch is enough to remind him he’s not alone in the dark.

He doesn't look like Dr. Robby right now—the sharp, fast-acting physician who can command a hospital with a glance and make impossible calls on the fly. The man beside you is just… a person. Shattered.

His scrubs are soaked in blood, some of it dried, none of it his. His hands tremble even after he’s wiped them down. You know that shake—adrenaline crash mixed with the sickening aftermath of decisions no one should ever have to make.

You bring your other hand to his back, rubbing slow, steady circles between his shoulder blades. "You're safe," you whisper. "Just breathe with me. In... and out." His breath still stutters, but he tries. His chest jerks with the effort of each inhale, panic still lodged deep in his lungs.

For a moment, it feels like he’s not hearing you at all. But then you feel it—his shoulders drop just slightly beneath your touch, his grip on your hand loosens just enough to shift from desperation to something like trust. His sobs taper to ragged exhales. He's still shaking, still barely holding on, but he's with you now. He’s coming back to himself.

“I lost five people today,” he says finally, like he’s reciting a number that won’t stop ringing in his head. “Two of them were kids.”

You don’t speak. You don’t interject. You just let him have the space.

“I did everything right. We all did. We didn’t waste a single second. And they still died. Just like that.” His voice cracks on the last word. He runs a hand down his face, leaving a smear of something—blood or ink, you're not sure.

“I keep telling myself to focus on the ones we saved,” he whispers. “To hold onto the lives, not the losses. But tonight… all I can see are the family members I had to talk to. The look in that mom’s eyes when I said her daughter was gone. It’s like it burned into me. I can’t shake it.”

He looks at you finally, eyes rimmed red and glassy. “I save so many people. I do. I know that. But tonight it’s like… all I can see are the ones I didn’t.”

You press your hand gently to the side of his cheek, grounding him. As he closes his eyes and leans into your touch, a stray tear that paints his cheek. “You were there for them, Robby. You did everything you possibly could. I know that. The entire team knows that.”

His eyes flick to you, glassy and raw. "But it wasn’t enough. I wasn’t enough. I'll never be enough."

That’s what really guts you—the way he says it. Quiet. Final. Like the math has been done and he’s come up short. Not loudly. Not violently. Just quietly, steadily. Like something that’s been held in too long, finally slipping free.

“You are,” you say fiercely. “You are more than enough. You gave everything. That's what matters.”

He drops his forehead to your shoulder. For a long moment, the only sound in the room is his breathing—ragged, uneven. Then, finally, it breaks. Quiet tears. No theatrics. Just silent devastation.

You wrap your arms around him, holding him like you’re trying to piece him back together. His body is wracked with sobs, shaking so hard it rattles through your chest. You feel it all—his heartbreak, his helplessness, the unbearable grief pulsing through him like a second heartbeat. Your own chest aches with the weight of it.

You tighten your hold, one hand cradling the back of his head as he buries his face into your shoulder. His breath stutters against your neck, gasping and uneven, but your presence anchors him. You stay that way, silent and steady, letting him feel it all—letting him fall apart without judgment, letting him not be strong for once.

"I told Jake I'd remember Leah long after he'd forgotten her..." he murmurs, voice frayed and trembling at the edges.

You pause, letting the silence stretch—just long enough to breathe, to feel the weight of his words settle between you. Then you speak, quiet but steady.

"Because you will," you say simply. "People grieve and learn to move on. But we don’t forget. We carry them with us—all the lives we've lost, every person we've watched die, every moment we felt helpless. The weight of it doesn't go away, Robby. It just shifts. Becomes part of who we are. The feeling that no matter what we did, we could've done better, the guilt that eats you up inside and lives with you... we learn to live with it. Not around it. Not despite it. And you're not alone in that." 

Robby doesn’t speak right away. He swallows hard, jaw clenched, eyes squeezed shut as though he’s trying to keep it together—at least, whatever little there’s left to hold. When he finally pulls back and looks at you, it’s with a kind of desperation that threatens to swallow you whole.

“I don’t want to live with it,” he admits, voice wrecked. “I want to forget it. I want to go back and do something—anything—to save them.”

You nod, gently brushing your thumb along his cheek. “I know. But we can’t go back. All we can do is keep showing up, even when it breaks us. And let the people around us help carry the weight.” 

“I don’t know how,” he murmurs. “All of this pain, this loss—it’s too much.”

“You don’t have to carry it alone,” you whisper. “Not tonight—not ever.”

And for the first time all day, he lets himself believe that.

[killishin]

— ☆ push and pull.

pairing: dr. jack abbott x reader

category: hurt/comfort, fluff, friends to lovers sort of.

content warnings: mental breakdown, mentions of death and casualties, not proofread at all.

a/n: the pitt is over and now there's a hole in my heart. literally sped through this after an all nighter so it might not be that good. but enjoy :)

wc: 3k

dividers by @enchanthings gifs by @ho-ii

life in the ER had always been draining, it took a lot. when you had first started, freshly minted, a med student, you remembered being fascinated. the wonder twinkling in your eyes. fast forward a decade and more, now you're sitting in the washroom stall with your head in your hands, trembling and shaking bad while trying to pull deep breaths. all that experience, thinking you're finally used to it all— it still takes a toll out of you. the deaths and losses were always going to chip away a part of you, and you buried the pain till you couldn't no more.

the oncoming casualties had ceased, things were getting back to normal slowly. you were on fire, taking on patients twice as fast, maintained such a neutral facade that even the sweet resident dr. king had to check in, head tilted in concern.

you smiled. even through the chaos you found comfort in that little moments.

talking of comforting moments, your mind wandered to him, jack. he's been the shoulder you lean on for years, the strength you needed. but as time flew by, years passing by like seconds, you had started withdrawing.

dependency made your body grow warm with shame, you felt like a burden. you were an attending for fucks sake, you shouldn't feel so.. weak still. so sensitive. you can't let your juniors see that, least of all him. he has his own battles to fight yet he drops it all for you, you hate that.

a slow puff of breath left your lips, agonisingly slow that it hurt your lungs for a moment. you steal your heart again, close the doors to your secrets, stitch back the deep scars on your heart close— not a tear out.

cus that's what you do, you shut yourself in, a cage to protect him. at least that's what you think.

and thats one thing you have in common with him, shutting the world out. too afraid, too scared, too careful.

"dana!"

she looked behind, hands paused on her hips as she rose a brow at jack. "can't find them hm?" she asked, like the all knowing mother hen she is.

jack sighs, eyes sweeping around, "i saw them in the south with whitaker and mel. now i can't find them." his eyes stop at the washroom door, dana's eyes follow. of course she knows you're in there, she has eyes everywhere.

"might have stepped out to take a breather, you know." dana answered nonchalantly, busying herself with a smirk pulling at her lips. years she has watched you both revolve around each other, yearning so bad yet all its led to is more suppressed feelings and yearning. the one pair of idiots her matchmaking skills don't work on, it oddly irritates her.

"right." jack sees right through it, sighing as he rolled his eyes. he's right here so why does she always hide? he rubs his face for a moment, running his hand through his hair before looking around. his eyes stop at mel.

perfect.

"dr. [L/N]?" your head perked up at mel's voice, immediately standing up, wiping and patting your cheeks to remove all evidence of a breakdown.

"yeah?" you called out, "im coming! you need something?" you checked your face in the camera, swelled and puffy eyes and lips. just perfect.

"uh— yeah? im so sorry to bother—"

you shove your phone in your pocket, barging out the stall with a forced smile, waving your hand dismissively. "no no its no problem." you are way too conscious about the slight tremors in your hands and lips to notice mel looking oddly awkward.

"what's up, dr. king?" you wiped your hands with the tissue as you walked out, making sure to look away from her to somehow hide your face. mel hesitated as you stepped out, looking at the man who made her do this.

"well— i actually-"

"oh dr. king!" jack materialized out of nowhere, a smile on his face and you stopped in your tracks, your smile falling as you looked between them. and now you noticed how hesitant and confused mel looked.

"your patient in south 17 is asking for you." he said urgently, ushering here in that direction while her mouth opens and closes multiple times in sheer confusion because that's mohan's patient? what is going on? yet she walks away, too tired to question her superiors who clearly have something going on.

he turns back to look at you, a shit eating grin met with a deadpanned stare. "can you stop bothering the juniors with your shenanigans?"

"only when you stop camping out in the washroom." he retorted and you huffed in annoyance, starting to march away from him, head down, totally not to hide the puffy eyes.

but he's fast. of course he is.

"you know it wouldn't hurt to talk-"

"oh no no you don't get to go there." you scoffed out a laugh as you leaned against the counter, eyeing the board while subtly shooting dana a 'help needed' stare.

"i wasn't the one bawling—"

"christ abbott." you breathe out a distressed whisper as you shot him a glare, "dana can you tell this old man to stop bothering me and my juniors?"

"hey they're mine too—" jack scoffed as he jerked back, feigning offense, causing dana to laugh.

"for once it won't hurt you to actually talk to him you know." dana said with a knowing smirk and you stared at her in disbelief. "wow. did not expect that from you."

dana simply shrugged, her smile widening and she tipped her head at jack as if telling him to take care of you. as if you need babysitting.

"lets step out. come on." he gently nudged your elbow but you pulled away, that immediately made his smile tighten.

"we can't. they might need us. they will." you replied stoicly as you pretended to spot someone.

"they aren't babies, sweetheart. they can handle themselves for a few minutes." he said, sounding a tad too firm with his sarcasm, which was a clear indication of his thinning patience.

"its never a few minutes with you." you accused with a scowl and he rose a brow at you, his lips pulling into a cheshire smile, as he gently turned you around by the shoulders.

"well then you better hurry up."

the air did do you some good, at least you felt less panicky. but his presence and worries of what this talk might lead to was enough to bring a different sort of panic. you legs had automatically started pacing around and you had to remind yourself to stay rooted.

"here. you need something in you." he held out a sandwich, staring at you with calculative eyes and yet they were now softened, lacking that edge that everyone sees while at work. you grumble something incoherent before taking the sandwich, eating quietly while he simply stares.

of course he has noticed how you have started to become closed off, reserved when things get a little too tight. hell its more than he does himself. he didn't say anything on it, choosing to simply wait it out— because poking at sensitive topics meant baring out his own heart. and that, he isn't yet comfortable with that. he's never been.

"i can literally hear your thoughts you know." you mumbled and he sighed, all pretense of mirth dropping from his face.

"did i do something?" he asked making your hands freeze midair and your brows crease, "or did something happen outside of work? you gotta tell me, sweetheart—"

"nothing happened, jack." you said pointedly, making your voice softened so he believes it but he only shakes his head.

"that's bullshit i know it is." his eyes had narrowed, his feet taking a step closer on its own, "you've been shutting me out. distancing yourself. and i don't know what i did to deserve that but i sure as hell can't let you do it anymore."

your teeth grinded against each other, lips pressing into a thin line as your brows furrowed with the glare. "you can't make me do anything jack. its my—

he scoffs out a petulant smile, giving you a challenging look, "i can. i have for years and it was for your well being. stop being so stubborn and dense."

he doesn't know why he is being so firm and harsh, that was not how it was supposed to go. all he wanted was to ease you back out from the shell you locked yourself in. but somehow he was irritated enough, or maybe he was unknowingly afraid. that you would pull back so much that one day he might just lose you.

yeah that thought scared the shit out of him.

"thats rich coming from you, jack." you snapped at him, tilting your head as you narrowed your eyes. "you wanna give me a lesson at opening up? seriously?" your taunts were sounding more vicious somehow.

"whats that supposed to mean?"

"oh you know what it means, don't play dumb." you scowled harshly, "you're the one who never told me anything. you're the only who pushed me away when you clearly needed help jack. so why the hell is it such a bother when im doing the same?"

lost in this little confrontation, both had stepped a little too close to call it 'normal between friends.'

"i never needed help."

"oh cut it out!" you rolled your eyes and he redirected your jaw with his finger, back to look at him. the mere contact made your heart stutter, blank you out for a moment.

"you always came to me. it wasn't so hard before so why is it now? don't you kid yourself in thinking that i didn't notice your swelled eyes. stop..." he released a sharp exhale, quelling the temper down, "stop bottling shit up. tell me. I'll listen. that's what friends are for."

and then it hit you. maybe its not just fear from being a burden, maybe hearing that term friends for so long while loving this man has finally tired you out.

your brows resolved as your lips pressed into a thin line, "we're just coworkers, jack. not friends."

he froze, his eyes widening for a fraction of moment. that hurt. this wasn't just withdrawing, she was pushing him away. drawing a line and it fucking hurt.

"that so?"

"yes it is."

he stepped back, and the lose of contact immediately made your heart seize with panic but you didn't show it. two doctors who were the epitome of control in the ER had spit out knives for words, all because they didn't know how to admit to the love they felt.

he started walking backwards, a humourless smile on his face that couldn't hide the hurt. "i'll be back when you finally stop acting like a little kid."

everyone noticed how things felt off between you both after that, avoiding each other's gaze, harmless banter turning to an almost argument with you glaring at him and him just smiling, all smug. but nobody pointed it out, too tired from everything.

it was time to go home, the night shift ones were ushering you all out constantly, not that anyone was complaining. it wasn't just the med students but everyone looked spent and fatigued. few had gathered in the spot at the park, like every other time, but it was quieter. you were thankful for the beer, the quiet of the night and the cold condensation of the can had calmed your nerves. smiling didn't hurt that bad now.

while everyone else talked jack looked at you, brow raised in a silent question. you sighed as you slowly shook your head, he really did mean that huh?

so you found a spot on another bench, out of the others eyes and earshot, you know how much princess loves to gossip. you can't fuel it more.

it was quiet at first, you slouched back and quietly took small gulps out the can while he simply stared at you.

"you kidding me?" he deadpanned, "right. go on, we have all night."

you groaned as you rubbed your face, head flopping back to rest while the can rested between your thighs. "i don't know what you want me to say, jack."

"maybe start with why you're pushing me away?" he gently urged yet the hint of amusement didn't leave his voice.

"i—" you gulped as you sat up, looking at the top of the can while idly fiddling with it, "i just— im not pushing you away. i just don't— god this is much harder than i thought it would be-"

you took a big swig before finally facing him, burying down the nerves, "i don't wanna be a burden- or seem weak, jack. i know you're gonna say it sounds stupid and I'll never be, all that crap— but it feels like it." you look down at his hands as your grip on the can tightens, "everytime i come crying to you like some little needy idiot, it chips away at my ego okay? it makes me feel that maybe i wasn't built for this."

"everyone needs to let out their emotions, not just you. you know that. and there's nothing wrong with that. talking about it helps" he argued back softly, resting a hand on yours.

you look up at him and smile, "that so? then why don't you ever do that?" you murmured softly yet the accusation stayed strong, and his hand stiffened on yours, "you barely ever come to me. how can you expect me to talk about it if you never do?"

"i have a therpist—"

"i see you on that rooftop—"

"now you're stalking me?" he huffed out in exasperation as he shook his head, withdrawing his hand.

closing and pushing. again. that fear slowly creeps its claws around his heart. too close. he looks back at you, at your softened eyes and his heart aches at how the time at the ER had wore you down. yet somehow you managed to look absolutely breathtaking. and he swears, he wished everyday, to do something, tell you everything he's been feeling for all these years. yet his throat constricts— he can't. he doesn't know how to. he yearns and wants, yet he's too scared to let anyone in. let them see the damaged pieces of him that he so effortlessly hides behind the cool facade.

"jack." you tug at his hand, encasing his in your own, "what are you so afraid of?" you gently murmur and he wonders when did things go from you to him.

"...you." he whispered out, looking back up in your eyes, his hand twitching in your grasp. to pull closer. "god it's always been you."

"you scare the crap out of me." his fingers intertwine with yours, and he pulled you towards him slowly, aware of how fast each of your hearts are racing, "and i mean both in good sense and bad. have you seen you when you go all out on gloria? " you stifle a laugh as you shake your head and he wraps his arm around your shoulder, making you snuggle to his side.

"be serious jack." you chuckled softly as you playfully nudged his side.

"but you do. you scare me." he whispers as he rests his head against your temple, "im afraid that I'll lose you like the every good thing in my life. maybe to death or because of myself."

your heart stuttered at that, and warmed. you both were encroaching on that territory you both willfully avoided, and now a part of you wonders why. its scary, but at the same time it fills you with an ache so intense. an ache just to have him.

"I've fucked up a lot of things. you, are the one thing i can't even think to risk it." he whispered in your ear, raising his other hand to brush off a strand of your hair, "you're— fuck- you're everything to me. and I'll be damned if i lose you."

"you know you won't." you assure softly, your eyes dropping to his lips as you smile while holding his hand that caressed your jaw, "i know you won't. you can't."

" 'sides, im too used to your bullshit." you quip with a scrunch of your nose and he huffs out a laugh, "be serious, sweetheart."

"i am, jack. i know you, like the back of my hand and you know me. we may have our asshole moments but god even then you're the only one who gets me." you added as your smile widened, and your breath catches in your throat when you catch him staring at your lips.

"we've spent... way too much time avoiding... this." you whisper, nervously gulping down and he smirks, "wasted you mean." he corrected pointedly.

"semantics. you're saying like its my fault though." you murmured teasingly and he shrugged, withdrawing his hand to hold your jaw.

"more you than me." he deliberately riled you up, his lips twitching in amusement as you actually got defensive. "hey that is not true—"

"too much talking." he cuts you off before pressing his lips to yours, tilting his head as he pulled you closer. it started slow and steady, to calm the wild beats of their heart. it felt better than the fireworks, like finally achieving something your soul waited for years.

his hand pulled back to cradle the back of your head while the other wrapped around your waist, and slowly the kiss got urgent. wanting and needing. years of waiting, desperate to get quelled. his kisses turned more intense, harsher as he nibbled at your bottom lip, smirking against your lips when you let out an inaudible gasp and he slipped in his tongue.

after a few seconds you pulled away, and he chased it with a few pecks. his eyes lingered at your swollen lips, kind of proud at that. you saw that, that smug bastard.

"i don't talk that much."

"doing it again, honey."

it won't be that easy to open up to each other, it'd take time, trial and error— give space and wait. it'd take a lot of time and effort but its okay, its okay when you know they'll stay.

reblog is much appreciated!

[fruit-snacker]

Happy disability pride to all who are in between diagnoses because the doctors don't know what the heck is up with you

[reidsmanuscript]

Seven Seconds

Summary: when Katie Jacob's gets abducted in a Mall, setting the clock for the BAU, who needs a legal favor, and it's been a year since the A.D.A. has know anything about Spencer Reid. Pairing: Spencer Reid x lawyer!reader Genre: pinning, SLOW BURN, maybe right moment?, angst bc i love angst wc: 4.6k! (i know so small comparing to part 1 bear with me) TW: cm canon typical violence, set in 05x3 "Seven seconds" (obviously lol), sexual violence, implied reader's dark past, glimpses of female rage. A/N: my idea for the serie is be taylor jenkins reid and have you question if lawyer reader exists or not (delusional bitch), english is not my first language and let's pretend it's proofread part I - part II - part III - part IV - masterlist

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Spencer sat on the park bench reading a book while playing chess with Ethan, brilliant kid for his age and good opponent, not good enough though because when he cheered “I see checkmate in 5, What do you see?” It took Spencer one glance to calculate all the movements necessary.

“I see it in 3” he answered looking at his book again, the kid turned around the board and moved the pieces

“We've missed you out here” he said, staring at the board amazed.

“Thanks. I, uh, I had to take a little break”

“How come?” His hands froze on the book for a second before closing it.

Spencer had been clean for over a year now, it was 14 months and 2 weeks ago that he had freaked out after noticing his stash of Dialud was gone along with his needle. Where could he find more? Who knew about his addiction? Where was his stash? Who the fuck is Dr. Fitzgerald? Did you report him?

His first instinct was confronting you, given that you were the only person who found out his drugs that he knew, the first days he was a complete paranoid, he jumped every time Hotch called his name, or that Gideon looked at him a little too long.

At the end of the week he was thinking where he could find more, and when that thought scared him, he called the number of the card you had left in the same pocket his drugs used to be.

“Hello this is Dr. Fitzgerald” said a calm voice, it was 10 p.m. so there was a higher chance of going to voicemail, but he got an answer and the tremor of his hands got a little worse. Was it the anxiety or the withdrawal?

“Umm hello.. this is.. Dr.. this is Spencer Reid and someon-""I've been waiting for your call Dr Reid” the other line interrupted, he froze for a second.

“I used to play with a co-worker friend of mine. He's probably the best mind I ever went up against. One day, he just decided that he didn't want to play anymore.”

Fast forward, she helped him get clean and stay clean after Gideon left, getting tested regularly, and gave him the contact of the help group of FBI addicts. He was better, he was alive.

“So you gave up, too?”

“Just the opposite. I attempted to play Through every permutation of moves on a chessboard.”

“That's an infinite number of games.”

“It's not infinite. It's just- it's exponentially large.”

“You couldn't have played through them all.”

“There's an average of 40 moves per chess game, And I'll tell you something– the more I played, The more I realized that every single match every single chess game, Is really just a simple variation on the exact same theme. You know? It's aggressive opening, Patient mid-game, inevitable checkmate, And I realized why my friend quit. He was tired of repeating the same patterns And expecting a different outcome.”

“That's because you haven't come up on Fridays or Mondays in a while” the way his eyebrows went up along his voice tone made him feel like he knew something that he didn't.

His eyebrows furrowed “What do you mean?”

“There's this great player who comes around those days, she even brings the best pastries, and her games is similar to yours, always two or three moves ahead, she always beats everyone here… i think her boyfriend called her Buzz or something like that, like the Toy Story character”

“Buzz?… i don't really remember anyone with that nickname”

“It’s probably not that one but you don't know her because she started coming like 8 months ago.. I'm sure you have a lifetime of chess strategy in your head that you're just sitting on, but when you meet her?” He made a dramatic pause “You'll have to play it.”

He glances at his watch to realize his 15 minute break is coming to an end. “I still use it. I just, uh... I apply it differently. I have to go. It's good seeing you.”

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That evening, the BAU was called in for a local case—a little girl, Katie, had been kidnapped from a busy mall. A week earlier, another girl had been taken from the same location and found dead hours later. Now, they were all racing against the clock.

Katie’s parents were desperate. As any parents would be in this situation, right? But when Hotch asked the father if either of them was having an affair—a routine question in abductions—the man took offense. Deep offense. So much so that he refused to let the FBI search their house.

Now, what kind of parent refuses to help the police find their missing child?

In a small surveillance room, Morgan and Reid sat with Garcia, who was visibly frustrated by the mall’s ancient security system. They were surrounded by screens displaying grainy footage from different angles—well, almost every angle. They had a single glimpse of Katie in one video, and then, seven seconds later, she was gone.

JJ and Prentiss were with the mother, aunt, and uncle, trying to get a read on the family dynamic. Meanwhile, Morgan and Reid had conducted a cognitive interview with Katie’s cousin. It had led nowhere.

“The family has refused permission to search the house,” Hotch announced as he stepped into the room.

“What do you mean they denied?” Morgan’s frustration was evident. “Your only child goes missing, and you refuse to collaborate?”

No one disagreed. They were all thinking the same thing.

“The cousin didn’t say much,” Reid added. “He was too distracted in the game room to notice anything.”

Hotch exhaled sharply. “I’ll speak to the detectives, see if we can get a warrant.” His tone was firm, but they all knew time wasn’t on their side.

Garcia adjusted her glasses. “Sir, I mean this in the best way possible, but it’s almost 8 p.m. I don’t think-”

“I’ll handle it,” Morgan interrupted.

All Reid and Garcia turned to him with identical looks. What do you mean you will handle it?

Hotch’s eyebrows furrowed, but after a moment, he gave a small nod and walked away. Morgan was already pulling out his phone.

“I have a contact,” he explained, dialing.

He put the phone on speaker. It rang once. Twice. On the third ring, a voice answered—sharp, direct, and all business.

“A.D.A. Woodvale.”

Reid went rigid.

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It was late in the office; most people had already gone home, including your assistant Molly. All but Austin, who was still there because he had a lead on one of your cases. You knew he was still hanging around because, over a year ago, when someone had snuck into your office to harm you, you’d become a little paranoid. You’d gotten better, but Austin insisted on keeping you company, especially since your car was in the mechanic’s.

You were reviewing a legal brief, pen in hand, skimming the margins to jot down notes when the desk phone rang. Without looking up, you hit the speaker button with the tip of the pen.

“A.D.A. Woodvale.”

There was a beat of silence before a familiar voice cut in—smooth, direct, urgent.

Morgan called your name “Hey. We need a warrant. Fast.” You blinked, setting the pen down.

Reid and Garcia exchanged glances as Morgan jumped in without hesitation.

“Katie Jacobs. Eight years old. Abducted from a mall earlier tonight,” Morgan started, all business. “Another girl was taken from the same place a week ago—she was found dead hours later. We’re working against the clock.”

You frowned, swirling the pen, going through the multiple scenarios. You had heard about last week’s case, and how slow the police had moved back then.

“We’ve got mall surveillance footage,” Morgan pressed. “At first, we thought she just vanished, but Garcia finally pulled something from one of the side corridors. Katie wasn’t taken by force—she was walking calmly with someone.”

Your fingers tightened slightly around her pen. “Someone she knows.”

“Exactly,” Morgan confirmed. “That narrows it down to family or close acquaintances.” They all shared a silent thought. Family.

We know they’re hiding something,” Morgan corrected. “We just don’t have the probable cause to kick the door down.”

Garcia watched as Morgan paced slightly, his tone firm but urgent.

“That’s thin, Morgan,” Your voice came through the speaker, steady and unyielding.

“We don’t have time for airtight,” Morgan countered.

Your jaw tightened. “You don’t have time for me to get laughed out of a judge’s office, either. Refusing a search isn’t a crime, and suspicion alone doesn’t cut it. I need more.” You understood where the suspicious came from, how are you supposed to help them if they had nothing?

There was a pause. A beat of silence. Then, another voice—one you hadn’t heard in over a year.

“99% of abducted children who are killed due within the first 24 hours” He cleared his throat, willing his voice to stay even. Spencer Reid. “75% within the first 3 hours, and what only law enforcement knows is Jessica Davis joined the 44% of children who are abducted and killed within the first hour. We’re already past the three-hour mark. If we don’t act now, statistically speaking—”

“The likelihood of recovery drops exponentially,” You sighed, already standing up, ignoring how his voice sounded. So different. So… clean.

Your gaze flicked to the clock. 8:06 p.m. Damn it.

You grabbed a blank warrant form from her drawer and reached for a pen. “Send me the address and everything else you have. Give me 20 minutes.”

Click. You didn’t have time for goodbyes.

Austin raised an eyebrow from his seat. “Guess you’re not going home anytime soon.”

You didn’t look up as you started writing. “I never was.”

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The courthouse was mostly deserted at this hour. The fluorescent lights hummed quietly, and the stillness of the evening was only interrupted by the sharp click of your heels on the polished floors followed by Austin’s boots toward the judge’s chambers.

“You sure you don’t want me to take this one? Sweet-talk her maybe?” he teased.

You shot him a look. “You think Judge Holloway is the type to be charmed? Plus, you’re a private investigator, not a lawyer.”  

“She’s not gonna like you showing up this late.”  

You didn’t miss a beat. “If she’s still up, she’ll make time for this.”  

Taking a steadying breath as you stopped in front of the door, you quickly ran through your notes, making sure you had every detail in order. Then, without hesitation, you pushed through the heavy wooden doors of Judge Evelyn Holloway’s chambers.  

Inside, the judge barely glanced up from her paperwork. “You have two minutes, Woodvale.”

Stepping forward, you set the warrant request on the desk. “Your Honor, I apologize for the late hour, but we have a child abduction case we’re working against the clock. A young girl, Katie Jacobs, was taken from a mall over three hours ago. We’ve obtained surveillance footage showing her walking with an individual—someone she likely knows. We believe the family is withholding information, and they’ve refused to allow us to search the residence.”

The judge narrowed his eyes, folding her hands on the desk. “And what do you propose I do about it? What evidence do you have to warrant a search?”

You kept your voice steady. “We have footage of the girl with someone who wasn’t a stranger, Your Honor. The parents are refusing cooperation, and the father was evasive when asked about possible affairs, which raises red flags about his involvement.”

Holloway sighed, leaning back in her chair. “That’s thin.” You were ready for that.

“I have the full footage from the mall security, including a timestamp showing the precise time the girl went missing. She is last seen walking calmly with someone she knows, most likely family.”

There was a brief pause, and for a second, you thought you were about to lose her. So you pulled Reid’s words from memory, adjusting them just enough to make them your own.

“Time is working against us. Statistics show that 99% of abducted children who are murdered lose their lives within the first 24 hours 75% within just the first three. And only law enforcement-”

She cut you off with a raised hand, signaling you to stop.

The judge exhaled through her nose, it was late and you were rambling about statistics and you knew she wanted you out as soon as possible when you started citing numbers. So pushing himself out of her chair with a slight groan. “Fine. Get me the paperwork. I’ll sign it—but you better have your ducks in a row.”

You nodded, her demeanor unflinching. “Thank you, Your Honor.”

As you turned to leave, you couldn’t help but feel the weight of the hours ahead of you. But you were used to this—fighting against the clock.

“Let’s move,” motioning to Austin. He gave you a small nod. “You got it.”

　　　　 　　　 .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅.

Exactly 15 minutes after the call, 5 minutes earlier than promised, Morgan’s phone rang. He answered it without even looking. 

"You got your warrant. I'll meet you there," Alex’s voice came through, crisp and businesslike, just as expected.

Morgan exhaled, his relief barely hidden. "Thank you, Woody."

He paused for a moment before adding, "I owe you one," then hung up, turning to Reid.

“Tell Hotch we’re heading to the Jacobs’ house,” he instructed, already moving toward the door.

Spencer had been timing her. It wasn’t the first time he'd gotten caught up in the tense waiting game of law and order, but the pressure of it had a different weight today. The memory of your voice, clear and resolute, echoed in his mind, sharper than before.

For Reid, part of getting clean wasn't just the physical withdrawal—it was the emotional weight of confronting his mistakes. The memory of how he'd lashed out at you a year ago still haunted him. How could he have been so cruel? The hurt in your eyes, the way he dismissed you, the way it all spiraled… it wasn’t just the drugs that had made him say those things. And the fury he saw when you looked at him, Dialuid in hand, how you looked like a timing bomb when he was trying to see if he could talk to you, the tension in your shoulders, the lock in your jaw, the grip on the file. He’d been battling so much more since then, in his mind, you saved his life by doing what he couldn't do.

He’d rather die than relive that moment again, than say those things. And yet, here he was, standing in the middle of another chaotic case, still carrying that guilt with him. He stayed behind Morgan for just a beat before pushing down his feelings and moving quickly. 

　　　　 　　　 .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅.　　　　

The engine of Austin's bike rumbled to a stop as they pulled up in front of the house, where Morgan and Reid were standing in front of the black SUV. You slid off the back with practiced ease, taking off the helmet and letting your hair fall loose.

Austin followed your lead, taking his helmet off with a groan. “So, what exactly are we looking for?”

You shot him a quick, sidelong glance, handing him the helmet, keeping your expression flat knowing he’s about to be a drama queen. “You’re not coming inside. The warrant’s for FBI and police only. Not P.I.s included”

Austin paused, a mock pout crossing his face. “Excuse me? I just got you here, through all that traffic, risking myself to get a speeding ticket and now I don’t get to search? This is the second time in the night that you P.I. shaming me. Do you hate me?”

“If I hated you I wouldn’t have bailed your ass out of jail… twice” you remark the last part. He had a talent for sticking his foot where he shouldn’t be, maybe that’s what makes him good at his job.

“You act like you wouldn’t do it a third time” he was mocking, but he was right, something you would never admit to him. 

You start walking to the house “Mhm.” you hum rolling your eyes, heading towards where Morgan and Reid were. 

You didn't expect him to be there, or maybe you did, maybe you wanted to see him and know what had happened to him since the last time you saw him. They were looking at you, Morgan with a curious already-profiling-you stare, while Reid expression was more… cautious. He looked so different, his cheekbones were prominent in an attractive way and not sickly, he had put on some healthy weight and was not fidgety. You were not mad anymore, because of course at the moment the hurt had turned into rage like it always does for you, but it was more because of phantoms than anything else. 

“Got your golden ticket” you said, avoiding Reid’s gaze as you pulled the warrant from the inner pocket of your gray coat and swung it toward them.

Morgan nodded “You staying?” He gestured with his head to Austin who was leaving.

“I have to make sure you find something, otherwise the judge will have my head for this,” you said dryly, shrugging as though the threat didn’t bother you, but there was a flicker of seriousness behind your words. You were only talking to him, which felt rude because Reid’s stare was locked in your profile. 

Reid was thinking how pretty you looked, how the black vest suited you, and he couldn’t ignore the fact you had changed your brown bag to a black one that looked nothing like his. Your white shirt and gray coat gave you an older, wiser look, but as Reid analyzed your features, he realized he didn’t even know how old you were. You couldn’t be older than him. Serious, sharp, and young... How was it possible for someone that young to be the A.D.A.?

Reid’s mind couldn’t let go of the numbers. The average age of an Assistant District Attorney in the U.S. is 36. You couldn’t be older than 25, and yet you were already in that position.

You glanced at him for a moment before stepping inside the house, feeling the weight of his stare. The look made him snap out of his trance-like state, and of course, his eidetic memory hated him, because for that brief second, he remembered how you had looked at him a year ago.

Morgan nodded and thanked you again before he and Reid walked into the house. You left the warrant on the hall table with a deliberate touch, your fingers lingering for just a moment—as if to remind yourself that you weren’t entirely done with this.

“Somebody lit a fire last night,” you heard Reid say.

“Well, there are dirty dishes for three in the kitchen, so they eat together as a family.” Morgan’s voice carried from the other room as they moved through the house, taking in the details.

If Katie was in danger, the signs wouldn’t be in plain sight. You had to look where they hid—where children kept their secrets. Their bedrooms.

“Hey, my favorite movie from when I was a kid.” Reid held up a DVD, turning it in his hands before pulling it from the player just as you passed by him, tugging on latex gloves before heading upstairs, you did feel a little guilty for not even looking or talking to him, but it was something you did unconsciously. 

“So they watch movies together, too,” Morgan mused. They were starting to build a picture of the family’s dynamic.

“By a fireplace in a house that’s straight out of a catalog,” Reid added. “Norman Rockwell couldn’t have painted this any cozier.”

“That’s what worries me.” There was weight in Morgan’s voice. A tension that sat between them.

Upstairs, you searched through the rooms with careful precision.

When you first became a lawyer, you made a promise—never ignore a sign. Since then, you have gone further. You didn’t just refuse to ignore them; you searched for them. Hollow eyes. Unexplained bruises. Small bloodstains. You looked for them in teenagers, in young adults, in the elderly. But nothing—nothing—was more painful than a child who couldn’t speak up.

Because they were small. Because someone older, someone stronger, was hurting them. There's nothing more hurtful than not being able to speak out, to say something and stand up for yourself. Except when someone did—someone saw the bruises, the fear, the signs—and they looked away deliberately. Because a child’s pain was inconvenient. Because it came with a mountain of paperwork no one wanted to touch.

You had spent your whole life making sure you never looked away.

That’s why you were hunched over the small desk in Katie’s bedroom, flipping through her drawings when Morgan and Reid entered the room. They started searching, their movements efficient and methodical.

“Katie’s been wetting her bed,” Reid said as he lifted the duvet, inspecting the mattress beneath it.

“A lot of six-year-olds do. Could be bad dreams,” Morgan replied, crouching beside you as he sifted through a pile of toys.

You considered that possibility—it was perfectly logical. In a perfect world.

“Some kids won’t get up at night because they’re afraid of the dark,” Reid added, his tone careful. Almost knowing.

“Or it could be a lot more complex than that.”

Morgan had found a doll. Not a Barbie missing a shoe or one that had simply been played with too much. No—this doll was different.

Its hair had been hacked off, jagged strands sticking out unevenly. Red marker smeared across its face like smeared blood. Its clothes were yanked askew, twisted, and wrong.

“Most girls covet their dolls like an extension of themselves.” He took the doll in his hands like it was made of fine glass. 

“Reid, I know these signs-— acting out on her toys, wetting the bed. She's obviously covering up something about that necklace.”

“And her cousin might be holding something back.”

“Well, this looks more like a man than a boy to me,” you said, holding up a drawing of a tall, shadowy figure towering over a small, crying child.

Morgan took it from your hands, his expression hardening as he analyzed the image.

“Psychology says drawing is a child’s way of channeling their inner world. Look at the strokes—how harsh they are,” you pointed to the dark, jagged lines forming the tall figure, then traced your finger over the smaller one. “And this looks like Katie to me. She forgot to draw the hands, which means she feels powerless… helpless.” 

Morgan took his phone out, dialing up “Hotch, we think Katie’s being molested,” Morgan said, his voice clipped. “And we both know the odds.”

A brief silence. Then Hotch’s response, firm and certain. “Most likely by someone under the same roof.”

He hung up, and both men started toward the door, their movements brisk with purpose. But you stayed behind for a moment, rooted in place, taking in the scene. Trying to quiet the distant sirens that echoed in your mind, the same ones always shouting when you were face to face with these situations. A loud pause—maybe out of respect for Katie and her pain, for everything she had been forced to endure.

From the doorway, Spencer glanced back. The dim light from the hallway cast your figure in stark contrast, outlining you in shadow—your form dark against the soft glow of the room. He couldn’t see your expression, couldn’t read your face. He focused on the way your hands curled into fists at your sides, the tight set of your shoulders.

And he wished—just for a second—that he could see more.

　　　　 　　　 .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅.　　　

You stood outside, leaning against the wall, arms crossed tightly over your chest. By your side were Morgan, Jeremy, Katie’s cousin, and Reid.

Turns out, Katie’s uncle, Richard, was her abuser. A disgusting son of a bitch who deserved to rot in hell. And you were going to make sure he did. He had destroyed Katie’s childhood, probably more than just hers, shattering an entire family in the process. His own son, standing right next to you, was collateral damage he clearly hadn’t spared a thought for. And then there was his wife. The woman who had chosen to look away. Who had taken Katie and nearly gotten her killed, all for the pathetic, desperate hope that it would somehow stop her husband from creeping into little bedrooms at night. She deserved the same hell he did.

A stretcher rolled past, Katie’s small frame barely visible beneath the blankets as the paramedics guided her into the ambulance. Her mother clutched her tiny hand, whispering something—words meant to soothe, to promise safety.

A young voice cut through the air. “I heard her call my mom’s name. That’s what I remembered before.”

You closed your eyes, your mind already racing ahead. Your attorney brain was piecing it together, sketching out the battle that was coming. If the kid had heard it, that made him a witness to the abduction. His own mother had committed the crime against her niece. And God only knew what else he had seen—what else had been happening in that house—without fully understanding it.

“We get it, kid. That’s your mom,” Morgan said, his voice steady. But you knew the truth: if Jeremy could barely say those words to them, getting him to the stand in front of a jury would be another fight entirely.

The boy shifted on his feet, staring at the ambulance. “What’s gonna happen to me now?”

If God existed, He had already been too cruel. He had let all of this happen. And you knew how these things worked—knew there was a very real chance that Katie’s parents, burdened with their own grief, would resent Jeremy by association. That they wouldn’t take him in. That he would be swallowed by the foster system.

You wouldn’t let that happen.

The sirens blared outside the mall, cutting through the air with urgency, but it was the ones inside your mind that were louder—screaming in the same rhythm, as if they were one and the same. Distant and deafening, they filled every corner of your head, drowning out everything but the grim reality unfolding before you.

“I don’t know, Jeremy,” Reid answered, his voice gentle. “But we’re gonna make sure you’re alright, okay?”

Jeremy didn’t look at him. His eyes stayed fixed on the ambulance. “Is Katie gonna be all right?”

You wished—desperately, violently—that you could tell him yes. That you could say it with certainty and make it true. But how could you give him something you didn’t have?

“She will, eventually,” Morgan said, his voice firm.

You exhaled sharply. The words made your skin crawl.

“Is she?” The question slipped from your lips before you could stop it—low, bitter, nearly spat out under your breath. Just quiet enough that the kid wouldn’t hear. Just loud enough that Morgan did.

Before he could respond, you were already moving.

Your feet carried you toward the police car, toward the sick, selfish bastard they were shoving into the backseat. Your hand shot out, slamming the door closed—harder than necessary, just enough that it cracked against Richard’s face.

Morgan watched. So did Spencer.

And for the first time, he realized just how much of a puzzle you really were.

Partially because, throughout all of this, you hadn’t looked at him once. Not when he entered the room, not when he spoke, not even now, standing just a few feet away.

Partially because your eyes, when he finally caught a glimpse of them, were full of something he rarely saw outside of a case like this. Pure, undiluted rage.

Not just anger. Not just frustration. Something deeper. Something personal.

　　　　 　　　 .˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱ˙ ˙ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅.　

part III　 Feedback feeds motivation! Likes, reblogs and comments are all appreciated <3

[helenanell]

You’re Good || Dr. Abbott

Dr Jack Abbott x DoctorReader

(In my head, this is an OC, but it’s written first person, with no name or physical description)

Summary: It’s been years since I walked into The Pitt as an Intern and yet amongst the devastation of the shooting, my confidence in myself wavers. Then, Dr Abbott appears by my side.

Notes: Minor Spoilers - Takes place in the aftermath of the shooting. Blood, trauma.

I also have to credit and thank @madsmilfelsen whose posting about Abbott x Mohan got me on that ship and consequently had me thinking about this dynamic.

Part Two

Having just successfully inserted the chest tube into my patient, I step back. It’s only once I’m still that I realise my breathing is shallow. I shut my eyes and work to rectify it. You can’t go to pieces. I tell myself. It’s selfish and you don’t have the luxury. Get a grip.

Besides Covid, I have never worked such a major trauma event, and I know I’m faltering. Faced with such devastation–too much to process let alone confront and help heal–I feel utterly useless. Even as Princess informs me my patient is stabilising, I can’t shake the feeling I’m faltering. Failing.

When I lift my hand to push the protective glasses back up my nose, I pull up short at the sight of my gloves. The blue latex is utterly subsumed by blood. Or maybe it isn’t, and the red is all that I can see.

I let out a ragged breath and take another step back from the patient, as if my internal panic will somehow hurt him, undoing all of our work to save his life.

“Doc?” Princess calls out, but it bounces off me. The concern falls at my feet instead.

I look around, searching for Dana, Langdon, or Robby, anyone that usually makes me feel a little less helpless when the trauma of the day lashes at me a little too hard. But they’re barely keeping their heads above water, awash with blood and doing their best not to swallow down the cries of pain and choke—

There’s a flash of orange in my peripheral vision. The luminous vest that identifies a Primary Emergency MD. For a second, I think I must have made a mistake and Dana isn’t across the department and is instead by my side. But it isn’t her.

“Turn.” Dr Abbot gently, but firmly, knocks his hand into my arm, forcing me to angle myself to face him.

His vest is smeared with blood, but he must have changed his gloves recently because he’s able to reach out and push my glasses back up the bridge of my nose without me catching a glimpse of red.

There’s something grounding about the gesture, and I make myself believe it’s because it’s jarring to receive any kind of aid from a man who seems constantly perturbed. If not by me specifically, then just from having to engage with anyone for an extended period of time.

“Thanks.” There’s a tremor in my voice, but at least it’s not a mortifying shake.

Dr Abbott’s an ass, but having his respect would feel almost like a career milestone. I’m definitely not there yet.

Dr Abbott just nods, casting his eye over the patient I just put the tube in. I wait for disapproval but none comes.

“You just saved that man’s life, Doctor.”

Seeing as I expected him to move away without another word, as is normal for our interactions, all I manage is to blink at him in slight shock.

“I’d hope so.” I say. “It’s sort of a requirement of the job.”

He gives me a suffering look. I’m sure he is going to leave now, both of us standing around for even the minute this conversation has taken feels like a luxury. A luxury we have no right to when we’re standing in a storm.

“Okay.” I nod myself, preparing to move away, but Dr Abbott stops me.

“Wait.”

I look back over to him. He’s focused on my ankle where, just like him, I have a blood bag secured, an IV in my arm feeding into it.

I frown down at it. Surely he can’t have an issue with me doing exactly what he is? It’s not like I’ve copied his homework.

“What’s wrong?—“

I barley have the question out when he’s dropping down into a crouch, his assured hands finding the bandage that’s keeping the blood bag against my ankle. He repositions it and then begins to secure it back into place.

“Sloppy work.” He grumbles, brow drawn tight.

I look up at the ceiling for strength. There’s the jab.

“I’m so glad you’re here to uplift me during this horrifically stressful time, Dr Abbot.”

He lets out an irritated huff and I narrow my eyes down at him when I feel the bandage tighten unnecessarily.

“Sloppy is never good enough, no matter the time.” He says.

“Well, next time I have to cut into someone whilst bleeding myself dry, I’ll emulate your grace.” I say, a smirk grows when he glowers up at me. “You don’t think you’re graceful, Dr Abbott?”

“Sure I do.” He deadpans. “Call me twinkle toes.”

I can’t help but laugh. “Oh, I absolutely will. We’ve just found your new nickname.”

Dr Abbott taps my ankle when he finishes and then straightens up. “See, I am capable of uplifting you.”

I gape at him and find maybe the beginnings of a smile tugging at his lips. Maybe.

Is he really trying to stop me from spiralling or is this just him taking an opportunity to goad me? I hate that I can’t tell. He has a frustrating capacity to fry the circuitry of comprehension. I don’t understand anything he does.

He considers my expression and then says, “I’m not fucking with you, Doctor.”

To ignore the warmth that ignites within me, I look down at my ankle.

“So,” I begin carefully, “how does it feel to be a trendsetter? Soon everyone will have blood bags for anklets.”

“Wonderful.” He says flatly, his good humour vanished. Well, that didn’t last long. “Okay, you’re good.”

I look around the Emergency Department, struggling to catch a glimpse of anything close to hope. Hope that things are calming down so we can start giving proper care, not just desperately trying to keep people’s hearts beating.

“Am I?” I ask shakily. “It feels like the bare minimum.”

“You’re saving lives.” Dr Abbott answers sincerely. “That’s not the bare minimum, that’s everything.”

I meet his eyes and attempt a smile. “Yeah, it is.”

He sees I’m struggling to convince myself but he doesn’t push it. “You’re doing great work.”

“I’m just trying to match the example that others have set for me.”

Something flickers in his gaze and I think maybe he’s remembering that first day, years ago now, when I first walked into The Pitt and he’d been my attending. I had been so intimidated by him, yet so in awe. Desperate to impress.

Six years later, not much has changed. No matter how self-assured I am, there’s something about him that makes me feel like that intern all over again.

Dr Abbott takes a step closer and leans in, his voice low, breath ghosting the side of my face. “You are the example, Doctor. Look around and you’ll see the med students trying to follow you.”

“I-“

I don’t get a chance to answer, not that I really know what the hell I’d say to that, because he’s already turning away.

“Keep up the good work.”

Then he’s gone, swept up in the emergency tidal wave. I linger for only a second before forcing myself back into action.

There are lives to save. Always.

Part Two - I'll Be Seeing You

[actiniumwrites]

love amidst loss

synopsis: in the height of the moment, you nearly die and they can’t deal with the thought of losing you

characters: baizhu, scaramouche, kazuha, and cyno x gn!reader (separately)

warnings: hurt/comfort, angst to fluff, near death accidents, not proofread (sorry)

notes: uh so i wrote this a while ago and didn’t finish it up until recently, so sorry of this contains some errors or if any of the game lore has changed or been updated and doesn’t match what i wrote :) lyney was also supposed to be in this but i gave up on his part…sorry 😭

Baizhu:

“Qiqi. Bandages, now!” Baizhu yells desperately. Your heart rate was lowering by the second, while his was rising exponentially.

Qiqi slowly passes the small bin of various bandages to the doctor, “Yes, Dr. Baizhu.”

He can feel his hands shaking, tremoring as they work as fast as they can to close up all your wounds. Even throughout all his strange adventures and experiments attempting to achieve immortality, he’s never felt more afraid and anxious than in this moment. He could care less about hurting himself, but you? You meant the world to him.

“Baizhu…?” your eyes flutter open weakly while your elbows move behind you to sit up. A speedy hand pushes you back down in an instant.

“No, don’t,” Baizhu says, his heart beating out of his chest at the sight of your consciousness, “you shouldn’t be awake right now. I haven’t finished operating.”

Your hands feel fragile and your breathing is weak, but somehow you’re able to reach into your pocket and pull out a small bottle. It’s halfway full and a gentle lavender in color. It’s the concoction he had given you a while ago, in case of emergencies — an elixir of sorts.

“What about this?” you drop it into his hands. He shivers against your touch. What if this is the last time he’ll get to feel it?

Baizhu adjusts his glasses, analyzing the bottle in this hand, “Is this…? You still have this?”

You nod gently, careful not to move too much, “I saved what was left of it. I know you said you couldn’t make anymore, so I used it sparingly. Is it enough?”

Baizhu quickly prepares a bowl and some other ingredients to mix it with, “Yes, of course. I’ll make it worth a thousand lives over, I promise.”

A tender smile pulls at your lips while life beats back into your heart. Baizhu sighs of relief, resting his elbow against the edge of your bed with his pinky outstretched, “Please don’t scare me like that again.”

Your pinky wraps weakly around his, “Promise.”

Scaramouche:

“What’s going to happen to them?” Scaramouche presses, leaning by the side of the bed Nahida had prepared for you.

Eagerly, he places his hand in yours with a tight so grip you’d think he was scared. And he is. Scaramouche is terrified out of his mind. “You idiot,” he mumbles against your hand, “why would you jump into danger for me?”

Your eyes are shut tightly and your skin is so cold. He hates the way it feels like he’s going to lose you at any second, despite Nahida reassuring him countless times he wouldn’t. He still has so much love to give you. And god, what if he never gets to admit that to you? To finally say that he loves you out loud?

His eyebrows furrow and his lips fall into a sad frown. Amidst it all, a weak tone that he can’t be bothered to disguise falls from his mouth, “Please just tell me they’ll be okay?”

Nahida fights the urge to smile as she stands by the doorway of the room, ready to leave and give you both space. She nods firmly, “I promise you they’ll be okay. You have nothing to worry about.”

He nods back silently, loosening his grip a bit on your hand but not quite letting you go. And as soon as the archon slips away from the room, a small and vulnerable, “I love you,” falls from his lips.

And he swears he feels your hand grip his back a little tighter when he does.

Kazuha:

“Man, I drank wayyyy too much,” Kazuha slurs his words as he eyes begin to droop shut. You push his shoulder lightly to keep him conscious, a small laugh echoes amidst the waves of the ocean.

You feel it too — the buzz of the alcohol. The entire crew of the Alcor had been celebrating all night with big lights, tons of food, and an endless supply of drinks. Kazuha and you had already had more than enough, and it wasn’t until Beidou forced you guys to sit out for awhile that you realized just how much you had drank.

As you both sit on the edge of the boat with your legs dangling over the edge, Kazuha nudges you back. Only, it’s a little too forceful and you aren’t sober enough to stop yourself from sliding off. Desperately you reach for the wooden rails, but it isn’t enough to save you as you fall into the icy water below with a terrifying scream.

The water thrashes around you as you so eagerly attempt to stay afloat despite your lack of swimming skills. “Kazuha!” you scream before the water enters your mouth and begins to send you under.

In an instant he dives in, both of you now sobered up and well aware of the fact that a moment of fun had just turned darkly serious. All he can think about his how stupid he was for forgetting you can’t swim that well and that he shouldn’t have pushed you, even if it was a joke.

Kazuha finds you quickly and pulls you up fast. By the time he does, the rest of the crew joins around and helps you both back up and onto the boat.

His heart pounds a million miles per second as he watches you painfully cough out a bunch of water. Your skin is freezing to the touch and there are even a few small tears in your eyes.

“Hey,” Kazuha moves to hold your hand tightly, not only to comfort you, but also himself, “you’re okay, you’re okay. I’ve got you.”

You only nod and lean back against the wood of the boat. He joins you quickly and you take it as a sign to rest your head against him. Gentle, but deep breathes leave his chest periodically and he can’t help but feel shaky all over. Kazuha had lost so many people in his life, and he’d have no idea what to do with himself if he lost you too.

“You won’t,” you whisper against his chest.

“Huh? Did I say that out loud?” Kazuha’s bright red eyes widen as they turn towards your resting figure.

You smile gently, “No, but I know what you’re thinking. You won’t lose me. I won’t let you.”

Kazuha hums contently to himself. He wouldn’t let himself lose you either.

Cyno:

“Is it just me or does something seem off?” you pause quickly, halting your footsteps at the slightest rumble of the complex structure you and Cyno had wandered into. You draw your sword quickly while Cyno swings his polearm from around his back.

His garnet eyes dart around the various hallways and statues, scowling as he comes to a realization, “It must’ve been those eremites we ran into earlier. I should have known they weren’t just ‘camping out.’”

Neither of you move as the structure continues to shake. Panicked, your arm grabs onto his as your eyes widen, “What do we do? If we don’t get out of here in time, this whole thing is gonna collapse!”

“Calm down!” Cyno shouts over the crashing sounds of rocks and statues slamming against the floor, “I’ll get us out of here!”

Within seconds later, a giant head of a statue falls from above and crashes just feet away. It happens so fast you lose your balance, feet stumbling as your arm slams against the wall. Suddenly, the panel you’re standing on slides away and sends you flying downward.

“No!” Cyno yells desperately, grabbing your arm just in time before you can fall hundreds of feet to your death.

Your hand barely holds on as you gasp, “I can’t hold on, Cyno! I’m sorry. Oh god, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to touch anything.”

His eyes widen in fear as you continue to speak. It’s the most scared you’ve ever seen him, but he can’t let you die. Not yet. “Don’t let go, please!” His arms hurt as he struggles to hold on, just barely keeping his balance against the sand covered floor, “I’m not going to let you fall.”

“I’m sorry,” you continue to apologize, eyes welling with panicked tears. Despite it sounding like a confession before death, you continue to hold on as best you can.

As if the dendro archon could hear both your pleas, the shaking stops suddenly. Cyno’s head shoots up and his arm grips your hand even tighter. With all the strength he can possibly muster, he pulls you up to safety.

Unable to comprehend what just happened, you quietly sob and fall against his chest. Cyno doesn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around you as tightly as possible. Afraid that if he didn’t, you’d fall again and he’d lose you for good.

“Are you…are you alright?” He mumbles against the crook of your neck.

You nod silently in response, “I’m okay.”

[terror-tonic]

My takes on the doughboys! (Rambling under cut)

MATTHEW

I know he’s described as charismatic, but I think Matthew is a bit of a loser honestly. What adults consider charismatic and what children consider charismatic are two wildly different worlds, and I think Matthew is firmly in the former.

He’s good with the younger kids- he reads to them, helps them with their schoolwork (to the best of his ability), and comforts/cheers them up when they’re feeling down. But baby talk and hugs don’t work on everyone, and while no one dislikes Matthew, the older kids definitely see him as a bit of a teacher’s pet and don’t try very hard to include him in their activities.

If he’s not spending time with the younger kids, then he’s with the caretakers and counselors helping around Playcare. Every staff member in the place absolutely adores him, and several have asked him to consider joining the team when he ages out. (When, not if. They never say if.)

Despite how “adult” Matthew tries to seem, he suffers from anxiety and trauma from the car accident that killed his parents. In times of high-stress, Matthew has a small tremor, mainly focused in his hands and arms. He also has poor balance and coordination, also stemming from injuries sustained in the accident.

Matthew cared deeply about every child in Playcare, seeing them as the younger siblings he never had. It came as a surprise to everyone when he was suddenly “chosen”- no fanfare, no goodbyes, just there one day and gone the next.

KEVIN

Playcare’s “problem child”, Kevin was taken in by Playtime Co. after his parents were arrested primarily as a publicity stunt, one they would quickly come to regret when they realized Kevin wasn’t a “quiet and shy” type of traumatized child.

Kevin’s odd mannerisms and cagey nature made it hard for him to make friends. Other children and adults alike mistook his flat expressions and lack of eye contact as disinterest or passive-aggressiveness, or worse, disrespect. Due to this, he would often be isolated from the other children, have entertainment privileges revoked, or have his possessions taken away by staff.

All of this only fed into his belief that adults couldn’t be trusted, and soon he began isolating himself of his own volition, becoming aggressive when others tried to approach him. Kevin began skipping school and other mandatory activities frequently, often ending up in the Game Station.

Kevin was repeatedly caught and brought back to Playcare, but even after lengthy punishments and increased security, he did not stop escaping. On one occasion, he was found in the Game Station by Dr. Sawyer, who was impressed at his scores, which were significantly higher than any others.

Much to Playcare’s dismay, Dr. Sawyer organized for Kevin to be able to visit the Game Station whenever he wanted, and wrote him a “hall pass” to show to security when he was questioned. All Dr. Sawyer asked was that Kevin continue to improve his scores, and he obeyed until he was “chosen”.

JACK

Poor, sweet Jackie, gone before his time due to a safety rail failure. The death of Jack Ayers is an unfortunate stain on the company’s history, a horrible tragedy that was entirely the fault of Warrenbach Construction for improperly installing the catwalks and railings of the dough production room.

Mr. Ayers passed in his sleep due to a heart attack shortly after the incident, and Mrs. Ayers was institutionalized shortly after her husband’s death. In wake of the tragedy, Playtime Co. generously offered to cover the cost of Mr. Ayers’ funeral and Mrs. Ayers’ medical care.

—

When Jack awoke within Subject 1322, he was incredibly distressed. 1322 spent five hours screaming for his “Mommy” and “Daddy” before it was sedated via Red Smoke due to employee complaints. Upon reawakening, 1322 spent the next three days curled in on itself, muttering to itself seemingly in an attempt to self-soothe.

[viinchester]

Haunted Reflections

Warnings: References to Violence and Murder, mentions of Stalking, Trauma (related to losing a limb & violent incidents), Obsessive Thoughts, Unhealthy Behavior, graphic descriptions in thoughts of Gore (Violence, Bloodshed, a bit of Body Mutilation), Moral Ambiguity (we're talking about Brian Moser here, hello?), Insults (like a single word lol), mentions of Drugs (two sentences, nothing about taking them), mentions of Death

Fandom: Dexter (TV Show/Series)

Pairing: Brian Moser/Rudy Cooper x F!Reader

Request by: @ireallydontknowohcrabs

Summary: You head to your routine appointment for a readjustment of your prosthetic leg at the Miami prosthetics clinic. This time, however, you are met with Rudy Cooper instead of your usual doctor. Unbeknownst to you, his dark secrets lie hidden beneath the surface, and you’ve unwittingly captured his undivided attention and care.

Word Count: 2.321

My Masterlist

A/N: Initially wasn't sure about which direction to go with this request, but I decided on one eventually.😅 It was fun to write, so I hope you guys will it!💞 Reposts/Comments with feedback are, as always, very much appreciated!!🙏🏼 And just as a reminder: My requests are currently open.🥰💙

You expected this visit to be the same as any other to the prosthetics clinic usually was.

You were going to meet Dr. Gardner, the prosthetist who had been with you since you’d first been fitted for your prosthetic leg, and he'd make a slight adjustment to it, and then you'd leave again.

But instead of that being the case, when you walked into the clinic today, you were greeted by someone else. A man, much younger than Dr. Gardner, with a tall frame and dark curly hair stood by the window and was currently slipping on his gloves. The doctor, obvious by the signature-white lab coat he was wearing, calmly turned to you with a professional and slightly reassuring smile.

“Unfortunately Dr. Gardner’s out sick at the moment,” he immediately explained, his voice smooth and composed. “I'm filling in for him, so I’ll be the one handling your adjustment today. My name's Dr. Rudy Cooper, it's nice to meet you.” He shook your hand gently before gesturing to the chair in the middle of the room. “Please, have a seat.”

You nodded, sitting down and rolling the cuff of your pant-leg up, glancing at him curiously. “Well then let’s see if you’re as good as Dr. Gardner at putting me back together.”

Brian gave a small smile as he seated himself across from you, gently lifting your leg to begin his examination on your prosthetic. “I’ll try my best. Dr. Gardner’s very good at it, from what I hear.” His voice was light, but he was already scanning you, taking in the way you moved, the way you spoke.

When his eyes reached your hands, he had to do a double take, his world stopping. Your nails, painted in the exact same way his mother used to paint hers. The hues were extremely similar, and the order of the colors was identical.

It came out of nowhere and hit him like a physical blow. For just a second his breath hitched and his usually steady hands trembled at the sight.

No. It couldn’t be. But it was.

His mother’s nails, now on your hands, like some ghostly echo of the past.

The carefully constructed facade of calm professionalism flickered for a moment as a flood of memories surged through him.

His mother’s laughter, the smell of her perfume, the soft touch of her hand as she ruffled his hair. And then… the blood. Her blood, mixing with the colors of those very same nails.

How could this be happening? He hadn’t thought about his mother in this way for so long, hadn’t let himself remember.

Blinking a few times, he quickly put your leg down and reached for your file instead, fighting to regain control over his composure.

He couldn’t lose it here. Not now. It was just a coincidence anyway. Just some random woman with the same taste in nail polish.

Still, deep down the shock lingered, sending tremors through the carefully walled-off parts of his mind.

He flipped through your file as casually as possible, clearing his throat once to keep his tone friendly, but professional. “Just going over some notes here. It says the injury happened... a few years ago? Could you remind me of what happened, just to make sure everything lines up?”

Forcing a polite smile, the mask of Rudy Cooper slipped into place, though it felt more strained than usual. His eyes couldn’t help but glance back to your nails every time you so much as shifted, the image of his mother — and her terrified eyes, her pleading hands, those painted nails — almost overlapping with you. He could barely hear your voice over the roaring in his head.

Not noticing anything off, you nodded, hesitating for a second. You hesitated, not because the incident was difficult to talk about anymore, but because it had become such a strange story to tell. You’d almost made peace with it, enough to laugh about it sometimes.

“Yeah, it was... a pretty bad day. Tried to steal some drugs. Not for me, though.” You smiled shyly, a hint of awkwardness in your tone. “My idiot ex, thought I could help him out of a mess he got himself into. But then I got cornered by three guys with a chainsaw. Like something out of a horror movie, right?” You laughed a little, but it didn’t quite reach your eyes.

Brian’s hands paused again, but he kept his face neutral, even with the chaos inside him growing. Drugs? That was already close enough to the horrors of his past. But then you mentioned three guys with a chainsaw, and the floor seemed to fall away beneath him. Though his expression didn’t change and he resumed his adjustment on your prosthetic, the memory inside his mind hit him like a sledgehammer, and in vivid detail as well. His mother, the men, the chainsaw whirring. He was too young to stop it, too small to save her, but the memory had never left him. The blood, the screams, the way her nails had clutched at him in desperation before the world went red.

And now here you were, sitting in front of him, your soft voice recounting a version of his nightmare.

Brian exhaled slowly, maintaining a steady voice. “That’s... an intense way to lose a leg. It must have been terrifying.” His words sounded professional, if empathetic, but internally he struggled to comprehend how this was possible. How could you have survived something so reminiscent of what happened to her?

His disbelief mixed with something darker, something predatory. He had been powerless as a child, but not now. Not anymore.

The thought of you cornered by men with a chainsaw, just like his mother, made something in him snap into place. His shock was replaced by cold determination.

It was as if the universe had handed him a second chance, a way to rewrite the past. This time was different. This time, he wouldn’t be helpless. This time, he would stop the violence, before it consumed you, too.

You gave a small shrug and kept talking, oblivious to the storm brewing inside of him. “Yeah, it was... I honestly didn't believe I’d make it out alive. But it’s been a few years now and here I am, still standing. Just… in a slightly different way.” You offered a small, self-deprecating smile. “Guess I’ve learned to adapt. Well, kind of. I’m still getting used to the leg in a way, but hey, I haven’t fallen flat on my face in a while, so I guess that’s progress.” You smiled again, this time more genuine though, trying to lighten the mood. “And at least my ex didn’t get the drugs. Silver linings, right?”

Brian’s gaze darkened slightly at that, though he kept his tone light. “I see. That’s very impressive and brave of you, as I can only imagine how tough all that must have been. I’m hoping your ex is not someone you still have to deal with on top of that?”

You hesitated, biting your lip and avoiding his eyes, a little uneasy at the topic of your ex boyfriend. “Well, actually… he’s, uh, kind of been stalking me, on and off. Nothing too serious, but... it’s still annoying, you know?”

Brian's fingers flexed around your prosthetic, the material fitting securely into place. His eyes, though still composed on the surface, deepened in intensity and became more focused. Your ex was stalking you. Lurking, like a predator. His jaw clenched, and his disbelief at the situation melted away, replaced by a new resolve.

I couldn’t save her. But I can save you.

The idea of this man, your ex, still in your life filled him with an odd sense of purpose. He didn’t care about people, not really, but this was different. You had painted nails. You had suffered violence. You reminded him of her.

He would make sure nobody hurt you ever again. Starting with that ex-boyfriend of yours. Yes, he would definitely be dealt with. Permanently.

And going further, from now on, you would become his patient. Dr. Gardner had served his purpose, but Brian knew, with a chilling certainty, that you wouldn’t be seeing him again. Not if he could help it.

He forced a sympathetic chuckle, masking his true emotions as he continued to work on your prosthetic with his usual precision. “That sounds... frustrating. You’d think he’d get the hint by now.”

“Right?” You rolled your eyes playfully, trying to dispel the tension that came with the subject of your ex. “But I’m fine, really. It’s just one of those things I have to deal with.”

Brian simply nodded, his hands moving delicately, ensuring the fit was perfect, but his thoughts were miles away, plotting, considering what exactly he needed to do next to make sure you'd no longer have to do deal with it.

He was nothing if not methodical, his mind working like a finely-tuned machine, always planning, always calculating. When it came to taking care of your ex-boyfriend and Dr. Gardner, he would need to use two different approaches, that much was obvious.

Your ex-boyfriend would be the one to pay in blood. The man had been the catalyst for your suffering, the reason you had been put in a situation that mirrored Brian's own mother's gruesome death.

So your ex wasn't going to just disappear, that would be too easy, too nice. Instead, the bastard was going to feel every ounce of pain, every bit of terror that Brian imagined his mother and you had felt. He’d stalk him for days and learn his habits, figure out where he was most vulnerable. And when he’d finally make his move, it would be somewhere isolated, somewhere he could really take his time.

The act itself would neither be quick nor clean. Instead, Brian would make it messy, and visceral. He'd use tools that mimicked the chainsaw that had haunted both him and you. While he wouldn’t use an actual chainsaw, far too noisy and difficult to control, he would choose something just as violent, perhaps a hacksaw or an axe. He would let your ex feel the terror, hear the whir of a blade, and realize that his time was up.

In his twisted mind, Brian believed that you deserved closure. You needed to know that your ex-boyfriend was truly dead. Maybe you wouldn’t know it had been Brian, but you’d know your ex had been taken care of — brutally, and publicly even. The police would find the body, bloodied, hacked apart, left in some abandoned place where no one could escape the horror of the scene. It wouldn’t be a neat kill; it would be a spectacle. The kind that left a permanent mark in the mind of anyone who saw it.

It would be justice for you, and revenge for his mother.

It would be perfect.

You were going to feel safe, knowing that the danger had been wiped out, grateful that the threat was gone.

Dr. Gardner, on the other hand, required a different touch. Brian held no ill feelings toward him, the man simply needed to die out of necessity. But the doctor was a respected figure in your life, and if he simply vanished or died a violent death, you might grieve too hard, or worse, become suspicious. So Dr. Gardner's exit had to be quiet, peaceful, and leave no room for doubt. Brian could easily make it look natural, the man was already old enough that it wouldn’t raise too many questions if he were to die in his sleep anyway.

He'd slip a small dose of potassium chloride into Dr. Gardner’s food or drink, undetectable and mimicking the signs of a natural heart attack. The man would feel a sudden, overwhelming pressure in his chest, his heart seizing painfully — but he wouldn’t be able to cry for help. And in mere minutes, it would be over, and the man would be found peacefully in his bed or his office chair, just another old guy who’d met his end from "natural causes". No one would question it, and you might feel sad for a little while, but definitely not suspicious.

And Brian knew grief over a natural death tended to fade more quickly.

Then you’d return to the clinic in need of further adjustments to your prosthetic in the future, and who would be there for you? Him. The friendly, capable replacement who’d been there all along.

As Brian thought about it all, his hands checked the fit of your prosthetic, his fingers running along the edges.

“Now, hopefully this adjustment will work perfectly for you,” he then said, his voice calm as ever. “If you need anything else, any follow-up, you can come back to me and I’ll take care of it.”

You nodded — still oblivious to anything going on underneath his professional exterior — as you softly smiled up at him and stood up, testing your leg and finding it already fitting better. “Thanks, Dr. Cooper, it’s great, and that’s really nice of you. I’ll be sure to come back if I need any more work done.”

Brian smiled back, but it was colder this time, more possessive. “Rudy, please. And I’ll be here, whenever you need me.”

As you left the clinic, you felt relieved, glad that everything had gone well despite the fact that Dr. Gardner wasn't the one doing your adjustment. Dr. Cooper, or Rudy, had been kind, careful, and understanding. He was a really nice man. Hopefully you'd have him as your prosthetist again if Dr. Gardner ever fell sick another time.

Watching you walk away, Brian was certain of your return. He intended to mold your future so that you would always come back to him.

You may not know it yet, but he was going to ensure you’d never need anyone else, ever again.