#dont stop taking your meds suddenly kids!
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Trapped in the looping hell of "I need to leave my apartment to get my meds that allow me to be able to leave my apartment"
#dont stop taking your meds suddenly kids!#although to be fair this time was just a series of unfortunate events rather than a decision on my part#agoraphobia is fun
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It's wild watching someone who used to be self aware (or at least, who didn't want to be like their parents) become entitled to things like avoidance. And children. Often simultaneously
#me#my friend used to be a very free spirit#ended up medically traumatized due to psychosis. went to court ordered therapy got on meds etc#made a bunch of concessions to reconnect with family bc their partner left them as soon as they were in the hospital#got medicated. got back to work. got into a new relationship.#and now suddenly behaves exactly 100% like their parents.#was even holding our homelessness over our head saying shit like#'you guys know you have to ask the gov for help eventually right? bc if you dont itll be me taking care of u and i want kids :('#(this coming under the assumption we somehow CHOSE to be homeless and that we HADNT asked the gov for help REPEATEDLY already??)#same thing w another former friend#used to have a fraction of self awareness. wanted to break the cycle#got married. got kids. went back to work and school and suddenly is entitled to not only continue the cycle#but to be avoidant as well.#bc you see. its really hard and stressful to have a job and family and home to be responsible for.#its so hard they dont have anything left over to be self aware or empathetic with.#and its true! its tragic for them too. its isolating. this is part of why suburban life is so terrible. the fucking isolation.#being a good little capitalist cog was intentionally designed to give you just enough privilege#just enough of your own life#to make you keep coming back for more#but to simultaneously run you so ragged that you never have time energy money etc to protest.#so you stop protesting at all#even on a small scale.#you dont call what your parents did to you abuse bc you want them in your life.#you dont call what your ex did to you 'rape' bc thats too strong a word and you want to believe you parted on good terms.#you dont call what the hospital did to you abuse or medical trauma. intead you say you NEEDED to be chained down? the fuck?#you start to believe all the bad things people said about you. and then you start to believe them about other people.#you go from someone who marches in the streets to someone who criticizes the protests for being inconvenient and impolite.#entitlement. its entitlement.#bc this system holds your autonomy and life and family HOSTAGE behind a paywall unless and until you conform.#and they can be taken away in an instant if you put a toe out of line
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hiya zak!!! it's 2am and i can't stop thinking about it- but if you had the chance to write how luke gets cured of his illness in canon, how would you do it? (eg. via "surgery, but there's risks"/"oh we found a magical anecdote to your illness, yippee!...etc etc)
hiya "anon" hehe >:3c!!!! first off, thank you for this ask cuz it's super interesting. my answer to this is rather specific and looks bad at first but Trust Me and hear me out on this alright
if i had the chance to write how luke gets cured, i wouldnt make him 100% cured. medically (and this is very vague because im not a doctor), i would make it so that maybe new medication or a new treatment plan is found that makes his illness no longer terminal, but chronic. the new treatment has to be taken regularly as maintenance, along with regular diagnostic tests like EEGs and regular check ups with aaron. the new treatment would also come with a lot of side effects like mood swings, fatigue, nausea, etc.
basically: i dont want him to be cured, but i obviously dont want him to die. however, i want him to have to fight this for the rest of his long life.
it'll be an arduous process, one that never ends, but one he has to get through. and one he dedicates himself to do every day, because it's worth it, because it's worth life,
because he's worth life.
why do i want this? well, first off, it's because i'd love to see more chronic physical illness representation in fiction. it's not always clear cut with illnesses, and sometimes there Isnt a grand cure and it's more like an endless slog of maintenance
second off, i will repeat something i said in a previous ask i answered about luke's illness, but a sudden and 100% cure feels like a too-neat deus ex machina to me, narratively. his illness has been shown to be as Very lethal and Very painful and Very hard to treat, so for all of that to suddenly go away, well....the writing would feel a tad cheap to me if it were that easy.
and third off, because it'd fit well with the themes of luke's stories and luke's character
actually, let me go back to that previous ask i linked because im gonna copy paste a whole lot from it HAHA since my view hasnt changed since i wrote it. in that last ask i say:
in general with stories, i am less drawn to super neat resolutions and im more drawn to resolutions that are more like “and things werent perfect and they never will be, there will always be problems, but our characters will be okay and theyll keep getting better and better, and it’s in this push and pull of struggle and learning and progress and getting through where their happiness lies” ever since luke was a kid, even before he developed his condition, hes had the fear of being a burden to his loved ones. and when he does get his terminal condition, this fear is worsened and he starts to see his existence in other people’s lives as a whole as a burden of pain and grief that isnt worth the trouble. and…i dunno, i just like the idea of him continuing to live but also continuing to have these problems that still spark fear inside of him and still take so much work to manage every day. and out of habit, he braces himself for pain, not just for the kind his condition gives him but from Life because Surely, His Loved Ones Will Get Tired Of All Of This, Of Him and The Problems He Comes With, Right? but surprise surprise, they dont. because they care about him. because this should not and is not a dealbreaker for them continuing to care about him. aaron creates treatment thats more on the preventative maintenance meds angle so luke doesnt have to just wait for a pain episode to pop up and then dry swallow painkillers every time. it’s not infallible , but sometimes luke can have hours, even a whole a day sometimes where the pain hes bracing himself for doesnt come. mc always reminds luke to take his meds whenever luke gets too busy or caught up in a case. he worries at first that it’s an inconvenience to her for her to have to remember his routines for him just in case, but that worry becomes quieter as luke realizes she reminds him in the same tone as she says “good morning” or “have you had lunch yet? wanna join me?”, just this casual and loving thing thats now integrated into both their lives the team are always ready to help too in their own way. when luke gets a pain episode in hq, marius offers distraction in the form of idle chatter on (harmless) internal pax gossip while luke waits for his painkillers to dull down the stinging. when luke feels uncomfortable tingling crawling across his whole body while out with vyn, vyn subtly helps luke move from a crowded area to a quieter one where outside stimuli cant further overwhelm luke’s senses. when it’s a bad grip strength day and all luke wants to do is punch something and fuck his useless hands up even more, artem tells luke about custom silicone grips that exist for things like pens or knives or such and that they could look for some next time they go shopping. it is not perfect. but luke’s life, even with the pain, is still worth living. everybody is trying to help and eventually, luke learns how to start helping him self along with them too.
in summary: i think luke is a fighter. i do wish he had less battles to fight, but one battle that is important for him to fight is the fight to believe that he is worth living and worth joy in spite of it all
so if i had my way, i'd write him having to manage his illness for the rest of his life
and i'd also write him having a full and happy life while doing that anyway
thank you for the ask!! :'D
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A lot of people online have talked about their experience with adhd meds and mine were- quite frankly really different from others descriptions of their experiences
When I first started taking my meds, I thought it wasnt doing anything. Part of that was the dosage, but a lot of it was also just. How the meds affected me
I never felt any sense of my brain being quieter, my executive dysfunction didnt immediately go away, and I couldnt suddenly focus as though it was nothing.
Being on meds has been more like a passive status effect than an active one. I noticed being a little bit more energetic in the evenings because I wasnt using all of my energy just getting through the day. I noticed my autistic traits standing out a bit more, because as the meds reduced my adhd traits, the "opposing" traits stood out more with less adhd impulses to stop them.
And most of all I notice when theyre gone, in particular. I took my meds not very much over the christmas holiday, since consistancy isnt too important with the specific med i am taking. (IF YOUR DOCTOR SAYS ITS IMPORYSNT TO TAKE EVERY DAY, DONT FUCKING DO WHAT I DO. DONT SKIP WEEKENDS OR HOLIDAYS. STAY SAFE.) It was there that the differences really showed- i rambled more and spoke quicker with few links between topics i rapidly switched between. Going to church felt like my mind was going to explode from sitting still. Cleaning my room was like turning into a stereotype; going from task to task, grabbing books to put away but needing to clean the floor first, and to clean the floor i need to do laundry, so i need to put away clean clothes so theres a basket, and so on and so forth
Caffiene to me is more like an active statjs effect. I can feel my brain slip into hyperfocus more frequently and on topics less interesting, evem if my leg was bouncing a mile a minute. I havent really had much caffiene after my dose increase- the only monster i had kept me up til 2 am. But it does noticibly affect me a lot more than my meds do
So like- TLDR, different meds affect people in different ways. Its not magical and you might not notice how your meds are affecting you until youre off them. But that doesnt mean they arent doing anything! Talk to your doctor if something isnt working for you or if side effects are too much of an issue
My word isnt law! Im a kid whos been on meds for a couple months and just wanted to talk about how my experience differs from what ive seen online
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im tired im tired im tired im tired
it is an ache that echoes deep in my chest and ive been felling the pulses of sound for years. it will never stop ringing, i will never be free. but i dont even want to because it would feel too empty without it and i wouldnt know what to do with myself, i dont even know what that would feel like but god im tired im so so tired and nobody can tell and i cant find the words to express it to translate those pulses into speech and get some fucking assistance over here
but no no no cant have meds because all i need apparently is just suck it up and let it go and use coping mechanisms to cope and cope and cope until fucking die because its not that bad and you just want to get doped up and hope it fixes your problems.
well excuse me if im tired of this.
excuse me if its been so long that i dont even remember what it felt like to not feel like this and i thought it was better to feel nothing because the anger sorrow despair was horrible, but this is a whole new evil. its fucking agonizing. at least even if it felt horrible i could feel and now even sorrow feels like a relief because at least its something and i feel thankful.
i feel thankful that its gotten so bad that my brain allowed me to feel and the worst part is that theres whispers in my mind tell my its not that bad because youve been worse. youve dont have it as bad. you can get up in the morning and get dressed and go outside and smile at the cashier in the grocery store. you can sit on the phone with your friends and help them. you can do your school work. you can pay attention during class. you can get apply for jobs. you can take care of yourself. you can do all of that, you are capable of it.
but every step feels draining all the time and i cant muster the energy or the motivation to see the point. whats the fucking point it. i can run it over in my head over and over, endless lists of reason as to why i should give a shit but nothing clicks.
i wondered why its suddenly been so hard over the past few years and i realized that my shitty way of maintaining my drive is gone. ive grown numb. its always been hard but i had the gut wrenching fear and anxiety to push me into action, or else, and i thought that was just how i worked and i was fine but now thats gone and im at a loss
im fucking drowning because im out of my depth. its that sudden fear when youre swimming in the ocean and the floor just drops and you cant see beneath you and thats not supposed to happen and god knows what could be lurking beneath
theres no shiny resolution, theres no tidy conclusion
its just ragged tattered remains of a kid who got dealt a shitty hand and now im left to pick up the pieces and put them back together with popsicle sticks, spit, and a wish for hope thats draining by the second
im tired im tired im tired im tired
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was almost asleep, but remembered magnus burnsides exists, so now i’m gonna stay up crying for a couple more hours
#text#magnus#personal bs in tags lmao#day seven since i ran out of meds: withdrawal is Hell#i keep looking for help online but the only advice is ‘dont suddenly stop taking antidepressants’#like wow yeah i wish i had thought of that and magically gotten a prescription#my head is spinning and my ears are ringing and i passed out today :-)#i also started shaking uncontrollably at one point so that was fun too#plus i had an emotional meltdown yesterday and scared my friends and family! nice!#watch your prescriptions carefully kids#god i cant wait until my appointment#i hope i can drive by then#SJSJSODHDORJDLDJ i regret taking such high dosages of two separate prescriptions this is Hell
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son of hades!riki watching femreader!daughter of apollo heal/comfort and later on cutely playing with little toddler campers to cheer them up and falls more in love w her bc of how good she is w kids
(its percy jackson themed, i hope im making sense😭 basically the reader has healing powers)
OH HELL YEAH PERCY JACKSON AA i dont even know anything ab the actual series, but i have read fics with its concept and ITS SUCH A COOL IDEA 🫶🫶 i had to do a bit research and it says hades kids can shadow travel and have earth powers..? hope thats correct jshdjd this was so fun to write, ty for the req anon <3 !! SOFT HOUR REQS ARE CLOSED !!
11:14AM — it was the hades’ kids turn to babysit the younger campers.
riki found kids a bit annoying, much too troubling and loud for his taste. but he couldn’t deny that the little boy he was assigned to supervise for the day was more than adorable.
his name was mingyu, a hermes kid with black curly hair filled and big brown boba eyes, his cheeky smile growing whenever riki swung their intertwined hands back and forth.
the little boy stopped suddenly along the camps pathway, looking up at riki with a big grin, “hyung! watch this!”
like most young hermes kids, mingyu was eager to show off his oustanding stealth and speed, zooming in circles at a breakneck speed. he was almost a blur to riki, moving so fast to the point that the older male’s eyes could barely keep up with his figure.
he chuckles, “woah, you’re even faster than hyung!” feeling playful, riki decides to put his own powers to use; manipulating a couple earthy platforms into the air, replicating a mini parkour park for the boy. “bet you cant get up there,” he taunts.
perhaps he shouldn’t have done that.
feeling challenged, mingyu rushes up to the rocks, pouncing higher with each one, the little boy cheers, laughing proudly with each jump. “more, hyung! make more!”
the hades boy gulps, hands moving in panic as he tries to keep up with the child who’s now jumping to each platform right as they’ve been formed. riki didn’t use his geokinesis often; evident in how slow it took him to develop each new rock. “h-hey kid, slow down! i can’t—“
it was too late; mingyu’s already jumped into the open air, expecting riki to place a rock beneath him, only to find nothing as he falls all the way down to the ground. immediately, the little boy bursts into tears, staring down at his legs that were painfully scratched up and bleeding.
“shit,” riki curses, rushing over to kneel before the younger. “hey, it’s alright gyu, i’ll take you to the medical cabin right now, okay?”
the walk to the meds was one full of terrible, heart wrenching guilt; riki having to carry the poor boy bridal style with tears and blood still running down his skin. right as he was about to open the cabin door, you had already pulled it open.
riki’s heart nearly began thumping out of his chest. he’d interacted with you a couple times here and there, always noticing little, endearing details about you, like the way you sometimes hit the person next to you from you laughing too hard, or how your tongue would poke out of your cheek whenever you were frustrated. he found you charming, it was unfortunate he’d be meeting you again in such a way. “y/n—“
“riki!” you scold, quickly taking mingyu from his hold, “what the hell did you do?!”
he gulps, quickly following you as you set the hermes boy down on the closest bed. you were rushing around the room in a hurry, picking a few wipes to clean the child’s wounds. “i- we were playing around, and then he fell! it was an accident though, i promise!”
riki was only feeling more guilty about the fact that he’d nearly forgot about mingyu’s injuries; much too busy admiring you despite the glare you send his way while you wipe up the boy’s blood.
“i’ll deal with you later,” you sigh, throwing the wipe into the trash. like a switch, your expression morphs into one of gentleness as you smile down at mingyu comfortingly. “okay baby, this is going to feel a bit strange, but just focus on me, okay?”
he sniffles, closing his own eyes nervously. “mkay, noona.”
“so mingyu, what’s your favourite animal?”
“umm.. i like tigers..” while he’s distracted you take a deep breath, muttering something as you place your hands over his scrapes. “but.. but i also like lions..” riki just watches in amazement, lips parted as the injuries begin to miraculously close up. mingyu is too busy talking about lions, hands fidgeting with each other anxiously.
suddenly, you open your eyes with a big smile, “look at that, you’re all better!”
riki isn’t fully aware of what happens after that, all he knows is that he is absolutely, undoubtedly in love with you. he faintly sees mingyu spring up from the bed happily, giving you a big, grateful kiss on the cheek.
his dad wouldn’t mind him going for an apollo kid, right?
i’m sorry if things are unnacurate, again i dont know much about percy jackson <\3 this was super fun anyway sjnddjn i hope i did ur idea justice anonnieee >:)
#delcakoo#delcakoo requests#enhypen#enhypen imagines#enhypen fics#enhypen fluff#enhypen fic#niki x reader#niki fic#nishimura riki x reader#nishimura riki fuff#nishimura riki fluff#niki fluff#niki#niki imagines#riki drabbles#nishimura riki fic#nishimura riki imagines#engene#enha#niki fics#enhypen x reader#enhypen drabble#enhypen scenarios#enhypen timestamps#enhypen soft hours#enhypen reactions#enhypen imagine#nishimura riki#niki drabbles
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Can you do tfp ratchet bulkhead and Starscream human s/o with POTS(or just a chronic illness if that is to specific)crying because they’re tired of family and doctors telling what is and isn’t wrong with their body and giving them unhelpful advice.
I’m sorry if this is too much but I’m going through this right now and I really just need some comfort. It’s cool if you don’t feel like doing this one though.
The Bots with a S/0 that has POTS
Notes: I'd love to do it for you! And homie if you ever need a hug. I got you. I can understand how difficult things like this can be so if you ever just wanna talk even if its a hello how are you. I'd be happy to talk to you. Also have a hard time writing Starscream I never know why
Characters: Bulkhead, Ratchet, Starscream
⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶
⊷⊶⊷⊶Bulkhead⊷⊶⊷⊶
Doesnt exactly understand POTS no matter how much you explain it to him
He knows though, if you go up. Theres a possibly of you going down hard
He's a sweet soul so he's always asking how your day was
And some days. Its just bad
Some days when he picks you up he can already hear the arguing before you even get out the house
"Take your meds!"
"They don't work!"
"Be reasonable Y/n!"
"They don't work!"
Bulkhead even knows they dont work. And you're brusing easier.
So what does he do to try and cheer you up?
"Hey why don't me make your bruisies into drawings! Miko does that with my battle scars!"
It makes you feel happy that someones actually trying to make you feel better
He acts like you dont even have anything wrong with you
Well he accomidates the best he can. Like sticking his foot out when you start to fall over to atleast catch yourself on something
Miko recommended him they should tucktape pillows to his peds
You called him crying just wanting him to pick you up after a mentally abusing day
You're doctors are trying to put you on a Home IV and you heard your parents talk about simply just admitting you to the hopsital
Bulkhead gladly picked you up and you dont wanna talk about it
Okay thats fine
"Oh! Miko picked up your favorite! Its in my glove box!"
Chinese hot dog buns with a bottle of water. Full of salt. And a great comfort food for you
Two in one
Especially when you've been crying alot
"Are you gonna stop being friends with me if my family puts me in the hospital?"
"What? Why would you think that?"
"People dont like being friends with problem people..."
"Ah! That's a bunch of scrap." He defended, "You're awesome!"
He's text book defenition of emotional support
He checks up on you regularly as you often take naps
Knows your whole medication list by the dinosaur stickers you label them with and your whole when you gotta take what
He helps you decorate your medicane bottles, makes them less intimidating some times
You actually draw little deerpy bulkheads on your medicane caps now
When you have to go get refills he'll drive you and the pharmacist thinks the bottle Decor is cute
Calls you a good influence to the little kids who get scared of medication
Its all thanks to Bulkhead really: he's there for you
⊷⊷⊶⊷Ratchet⊶⊷⊶⊷
Actually
He had to find out himself, or more of force it out of you.
All the brusies and the suddenly going pale. He knows your secretly taking pills too
He doesnt exactly know what your doing
But he knows you're hiding something
"What are you taking?"
"What? Nothing." Y/n spoke dry swallowing the pills as quick as Y/n could, no one had to know.
"What are you taking."
"Nothing Ratchet."
"Y/n."
Y/n eyes rolled, "its medicane."
"Are you sick?"
Y/n looked at him and nodded shortly, "in a way yeah"
And thats how he learns about you having POTS
He ask how your doing physically and not much about you mentally
He tends to stay away from connection in general due to the past but with you he wants to be invested but doesn't completely at the same time.
But once you call him real late at night crying he's emotionally invested.
He's a doctor yeah but knows squat shit about human bodies, so it's more of you see Ratchet as a "friend" (yeah right your invested) than a doctor
"They wanna put me on a home iv." Y/n told him, all curled up in his passenger seat, "I already know it won't work. I've tried it before."
"Perhaps diffrent Medication?" Ratchet suggested.
Y/n shrugged, "I...I'm tired of med's Ratchet."
"I know." He spoke, "Are they giving you any other options?"
"Service Animal. More Meds or an IV." Y/n told him, "Dad just wants to leave me at a hospital."
Ratchet's in silence, he sitting in thought, "Perhaps that's for the best. Perhaps not a hospital. But to leave."
"You mean like take a break from my family?" Y/n questioned, "I guess..."
So Ratchet let you room with him for a few days.
Its kept secret.
You're very happy that you're not as bad as you usually are. And was happy to see Stress was making your dizzy spells worse and more frequent.
Luckily you're relaxed with Ratchet and he asked genuine questions about what your illness truly is
So he makes sure you eat, drink lots of water, always keeps tabs on you.
And to enforce you eating and drinking, he forces himselves to take scheduled breaks
Those forced breaks allow both of you to relax and even allow Ratchet to work better.
But sometimes you still gotta just like lay down.
Even if its on his work space.
"Are you alright?"
"Just a bad one is all."
And he leaves it at that. Sure he still watches over you but he's not gonna baby you
Not over something he knows you have in control
But occasionally he does become helicopter mom
⊷⊶⊷Starscream⊷⊶⊷
Could absolutely careless to be honest
The veichons probally cared more about you than anything
That was in the beginning of course
Until he realized alot of the veichons started taking random ass breaks with you
Litterally sat in the hallway with you while you're tryin to even out
High altitude on the nemsis especially if your on the dock makes it worse
He teases you about it: saying fleshies are scared of height
But like no bro. Your about to litterally pass out
Thanks Breakdown for atleast be like "ayo. She's litterally dieing."
He finally sees this is a bit more than a height issue
No shit
He finally starts taking notice seeing you napping alot in Knockouts medbay
"Great. A screamer and a neglecting mech is in the medbay." Breakdown grumbled.
"Ignore him," Knockout spoke waving off Starscream.
"Excuse me-"
He's basically ignored by the others.
Breakdowns basically your big brother and Starscream being neglectful of Y/n's health does not make him happy
Starscream finally comes around to ask you what the hell is actually happening.
But it turns into and arguement: you dont wanna tell him, and you're tryin to just keep tears back from before he picked you up w/ a ground bridge
"Doesn't matter."
"It quiet obviously does if you're little medbay group is all over it."
"Oh please." Y/n grumbled the stopped, Y/n feeling Rocky, "shit..."
Y/n immediately takes a seat, right there in the middle of the hall.
"Becoming Dizzy?" A passing Veichon spoke.
"Yep."
Food was tossed a packet and a bottle of water by the veichon, both being terribly thrown Y/n's way.
"Thanks." Y/n spoke leaning over to grab the bag and water then looked up at Starscream and sighed, "I have POTS."
"You have what?"
So there you are explaining it to him
He's upset you didnt explain it to him sooner.
You shrugged as you ate the pretzels
No he's like genuinely upset
He's been watching over you this long and just now knows about this
How does he even research POTS? He did search it up but he just got pots you cool with
Soundwave helps, in the side research
Though he doesnt have much space to store you snacks, he knows the medbay has snacks for you
He also knows that you're most comfortable in the medbay as you're often sleeping more than 1/2 the day
So. He's often visiting the medbay even more than usual now
Even if your sleeping alot more and he doesn't get to talk to you as Much as he wants to, your health is more important
Keeps you away from the flight deck
Because if you suddenly get dizzy and tip the wrong way well.
He doesnt need a spark attack
#transformers#tfp#transformersprime#tfp headcanons#tfp ratchet#tfp bulkhead#tfp starscream#headcannons#tfp decepticons#tfp autobots#x reader#tfp x reader headcannons
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breaking down this anti-ian article bc it bothers me ( from the child of a bipolar mother and a male teen with same sex attraction ) while also providing valid reasons ian sucks ( from someone who likes ian )
ive had this drafted for a while so i dont think i cover anything from season 11
tw for i^cest and r^pe
he was with a married man
in this point it points out that he was with kash and he continued his relationship with kash even after linda put cameras in the store
“Ian didn't seem to care about how wrong his affair with Kash was or how much it could hurt Kash's wife Linda, whom he saw at the store regularly. “
that is a quote from that part.
ian gallagher was fifteen in season one, kash was an older man who bought him gifts and payed attention to ian ,, that was not on ian , none of that was ian fault because he was a child
ian wasnt open with lip
“ Ian didn't tell Lip about his preferences and forced Lip to figure it out on his own. Lip was instantly accepting of his brother's truth and even offered to help him figure out any confusion he might be harboring, so it's really strange that Ian wasn't just upfront with his closest confidant from the start.”
no , lip wasnt forced to figure it out on his own and he also wasn’t instantly accepting.
in this point it mentions that ‘they’re extremely close ( bestfriends and brothers ) so its strange ian didnt tell him’
like point 1 , ian is a fifteen year old boy, growing up on the southside , and thoughout the show it has mentioned multiple times that the southside isnt that accepting
back to lip -- lip wasnt accepting, sure he was fine but ‘helping your younger brother figure it out’ by having a (female) classmate give him a blowjob isnt helping
he secretly dated his best friends brother
“Most friends have an unspoken rule about not dating each other's siblings, but Ian broke this rule by secretly entering into a relationship with Mandy's closeted brother Mickey.”
the only thing i have to say about this is , he was still with kash and mickey was a boy in his age group who was gay , growing up in the southside ian probably thought he was the token gay so of course hes going to chase after mickey
he stood by as kash attacked mickey
“Ian didn't do anything to stop Kash from shooting his new lover, and didn't even tell the police about his boss' over-the-top display of jealous action so proper justice could be served.”
okay. because two men he had fallen for had gotten into a fight, there was a gun involved and he panicked, in the end after mickey got shot he went to him
now to address the quote, he didnt say anything to the police because he probably knew that that would bring shame onto kash and his family, along with mickey and his family who are very homophobic
oh yeah and it was like 2011 and cops suck and THEY LIVE ON THE SOUTHSIDE
he and lip tried framing terry milkovich
oh the homophobic and racist dad of his boyfriend and bestfriend who tried to kill him and r*ped his daughter ?
yeah , shit man , that was real bad they shouldn’t have done that /s
he dated jimmy-steves married father
“Ian didn't bother telling Jimmy the truth about his father and didn't end his relationship with Lloyd upon finding out that he had a secret wife and family, either.”
at this point ian is probably sixteen but that doesnt matter bc i wont even address that
he met him at a club and then used his relationship with ned to make mickey jealous which was one of the reasons he kept seeing him, he didnt tell jimmy-steve about the relationship or his father bc he shouldnt find out from him he should find out from his father , again like kash, ned was an older man who payed attention to ian and ned later did develop feelings feelings for ian
he stole lips identity to enlist in the army
he enlisted because he didnt know what to do with himself, its implied/stated that the army timeline was the start of his bipolar
“While impersonating Lip, Ian had tried to steal a helicopter and then proceeded to go AWOL.”
this is because of the bipolar he suffers from, it is referenced later in the series after he gets back and hes manic
ian refused to accept being bipolar
of course he didnt accept it, it is made very clear that his family thinks lowly of monica so of course if hes the lucky duck to get what his siblings demonize her for, of course he’ll not want to be it
“He refused to take medications that could alter his personality or mood.”
okay. this is why im making this whole post, this goes along with part 15 ( or so idk ) ,,
my mother , my dear mother, who is bipolar and doesnt take her meds because they are mood altering , my mom doesnt take med because she told me once that they make her feel like shit, she told me that a little after i was born she started taking them but realized she felt nothing, she felt nothing for my dad or for i ( making her numb )
she told me anti deppresents dont help either because when shes on them and manic it pushes her past productive and into angry
my dad told me that when my mom was on bi polar medication she would seem angry most of the time
he wasnt faitful to mickey
“Ian's bipolar disorder made him very reckless and impulsive and led him to be unfaithful.”
lets break that down.
ians. bipolar. disorder.
this plot point i actually didnt like, mainly bc ian never addresses it so ill give the article a point. but then i take away 2 because they have more of a problem with his bipolar messing with him rather than the fact he never apologized and they never worked it out
ian stole yevgeny
before i start quoting i should mention because his boyfriend, who has supported and helped him is suddenly telling him he needs help, he was helping raise yev so he’ll see yev as his own
“Ian failed to recognize just how crazy he was acting...”
cuting you off right there , he was in a bipolar state, he wasnt ‘crazy’ and isnt ‘crazy’
he cant even keep count of his number of partners
just slutshaming i see
he helped throw frank off a bridge
“His relationship with Frank was understandably never the same after that, as Frank struggled to get over this act of betrayal and cruelty.”
‘was never the same after that’ frank never liked ian, ian was probably his least favorite and that point is very apparent
also , it wasnt just ian , his siblings and his boyfriend caleb
he left a healthy relationship to be with mickey
he fell in love with mickey at 15 , mickey was a comfort and always someone to fall back on, when mickey was taken away and no longer in the picture his heart still obviously was with mickey and when mickey came back he didnt know what to do
he told mickey he had a boyfriend but because mickey has been such a constant in his life he finally has back of course he couldnt resist
he liked trevor, i could tell he did but trevor wasnt the one he watched get r^ped by a russian prostitute, he wasnt the one ian was secretly dating bc it would be a death wish other wise, he wasnt the one there when ian was manic or depressive ( at the start )
he tried blackmailing an old client for money
“Instead of raising the money in an honest manner, Ian chose to visit an old client from his time working at the Fairy Tail and blackmail him into funding the shelter.”
because he felt indebted to trevor and wanted to make it up to him, it would have taken longer to do it in ‘an honest manner’ when his sister would have gotten it instead, he knew how much gay youths like he once was needed a safe place
“He grew up wanting to be nothing like his father, but this whole money-making scheme was straight out of the Frank playbook”
because thats all he knows, he grew up with that ‘playbook’ so of course hes going to take a page out of it, he is nothing like frank , franks money making schemes are selfish and for his own greed while ian wanted the money to help build a safe space for lgbt youth
he let fame inflate his ego
of course he did, hes a southside kid who was destined to fail
also it is very apparent that during the gay jesus era he went off his medication which didnt help
“Before long, he just completely forgot about his ex and focused solely on being a deity”
as much as yes, he did let it mess with his head, he was trying to still help lgbt youth and was going against anti gay churchs , in the end it didnt work out for him because he was off his meds and went over board
he stopped taking his meds
see previous point and ‘ian refused to accept being bipolar’
he actually wanted to stay in prison
because he was doing good in there
ian was helping others and was spreading awareness about lgbt with in the prison , and as him and jail scenes go , we can see people were listening to him and he was trying to make it safe sane and consensual
he let down his army of followers
“Ian admitted that most of his actions were completely irrational and the mere results of his bipolar disorder.”
he didnt want to, we can see this, because he knew he would let down everyone, his family were the only ones to ever ground him and they knew it would be the best option for his own mental health
during the gallavich wedding we can see that a lot of his supporters still have his back because they must know how hard it was for him to put all of that success on something he can’t control
he constantly wasted his potential
this is actually the only point in this article i actually agree with , so only 1/20 i agree with
his relationship with mickey wasn’t actually great
“Mickey spent the first several years of their relationship denying his feelings for Ian.”
he was raised by a homophobic and racist father who he knew would react the way he did when terry had caught the two that one day
“Even after he finally embraced his true self, Ian's bipolar disorder kept them from becoming truly happy together.”
yes but mickey was there for him the entire time and helped him through it, he told him he loved him which was really big for him and did his best to care for him
“They couldn't seem to remain faithful to each other for more than a few weeks.”
back to the point about ians bipolar but for mickey he wanted monogamy , now that scene in s11 may say otherwise but it is very clear that he wants a monogamous relationship with ian and ian ( after getting help ) wants one too, and in the later seasons they are monogamous
“When Mickey asked Ian to run away to Mexico with him, Ian refused.”
he wanted to, it’s obvious, but ian has his family and didnt want to abandon them again, i think part of him knew he would see mickey again because they always find eachother, he gave mickey all of his money and wanted mickey to have a good life
“Their relationship was simply never healthy.”
no it wasnt, but thats why the ship is great in its own way, the gay closet kid raised by a homophobic man is obviously going to have a lot of baggage , and ian who is bipolar and struggling with himself will also have a lot of baggage , but in the end they love eachother and that really shows in season five and season seven specifically
that is all lol ,,, this is long sorry
now, i am not a ian apologist , i love ian but hes a dumbass sometimes
actual valid reasons ian sucks
genuinely believes frank is worse than terry
yes frank was definitely abusive but terry is definitely worse ,,
mentally/physically/sexually abusive , the whole nine yards
terry hired a prostitute to r^pe his son , threatened to kill him and ian on multiple occasions , r^ped his daughter who ended up pregnant and is actively racist
frank on the other hand will make gay jokes but in the end doesnt give enough of a shit , he has attacked his children on multiple occasions but not to the brutality that terry has ( this isnt me excusing it )
sorry ian , terry is worse
never apologized
he never apologized for all the shit he put mickey and his family through, never apologized to mickey for cheating on him , never apologized for all the manic and depressive episodes mickey endured with him
never apologized for walking away when he couldn’t handle it, in hall of shame mickey actually acknowledges this saying ‘its youre whole MO’
debbies sexuality
he has constantly made statements saying debbie isnt gay and that bothers me because , why does it care ? as a gay man and as a gay man who soent time with a lot of lgbt youth wouldnt he support his sister even if shes just ‘experimenting’?
in the recent season he doesnt seem to care and doesn’t say anything but it still bothers me
mickey only getting like 80% of his heart
okay look , i get what ian means when he says this , everyones hes been with has made him who he is but fucking hell dude ,, shut up , thats your husband , thats the love of your life you shouldnt be saying shit like that , especially to him
and then this man had the audacity to say mickey probably feels the same about past flings when he knows that ian is the only one hes probably ever been with/serious about
obviously there is probably more but those are the main ones that come to mind
—
before anyone brings up the trans or bi thing im going to explain my thought process for him
like ive probably mentioned multiple times he grew up southside and obviously only ever grew up with lgb and not t ,, trevor did inform him a lot and ian became supre accepting of everyone,, sexual preference isnt transphobic but i do think he approached the matter badly
now the bi thing , legit all i think is that he doesnt hate bisexual people its just that the man he really liked slept with a woman and never expressed any heterosexual attraction so it probably just suprised him and pissed him off because caleb did cheat on ian
—
if you read this far HOLY SHIT THANKS LOL ,, im not adding things that i think are pro about ian this was just me breaking down that article and giving my two cents :)
feel free to message me and talk to me or send me articles like this about any other character/relationship and i will totally break that one down too lol
thanks for letting me rant
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Offside Pt 13
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13
Series Masterlist!
Genre: Smut, Soccer AU, College AU
Pairings: Soccer Player! Jungkook X Sports Trainer! Reader
Word Count: 2k
Other BTS members all make a cameo as well because I’m an OT7 Trash!
You work as a sports trainer, providing basic first aid and injury management for the Hanguk University’s soccer team. Going with your mundane life of caring for the dozen of guys hurting themselves in the soccer game takes a turn when one of the guys catches your eyes. It’s not his breathtakingly good looks or his muscular athletic body usually seducing girls at the campus that catches your eyes. But the action plan in your kit, indicating he is diagnosed with Asthma is what draws your eyes time and time again to the Golden Boy of Hanguk University.
Warning: Slow burn, eventual smut, Taehyung being a freaking tease the whole time, Also Jimin not letting the female MC live for one day, Fuckboy!Jungkook, Asthmatic! Jungkook , mentions of episodes of Asthma, Take your Ventolin kids, Take your medications kids!
“Look Jeon, I’m saying this as your Hyung and your senior, you need to learn to save your energy if you wanna play for long,”
You lift one of the boxes of tapes and reach for the cabinet shelf at the top to settle the heavy box there as you listen to the captain’s calm but intimidating voice
“I’m grateful you’re giving it your all, but as the captain I can’t watch you exert yourself to the half time and tap out the second half on my watch.”
You bite the corner of your lips, heart beating rapidly at the warning behind the words that leaves Hoseok’s voice. The captain is often calm and collected, but he doesn’t hesitate to scold his teammates as their leader.
“I had a chat with Seokjin Hyung after our meeting last week,” Hoseok continues with a hesitant tone “In the past two years I’ve never allowed any special considerations for you just because of you condition- “
“Hyung, just do as you always do,” Jungkook finally speaks up “I’m fine, Seokjin Hyung is just blowing it out of proportion.”
“If he didn’t, I would have brought it,” Hoseok interjects the younger’s argument “I’ve been watching you play since day one, I can tell when you’re tired or when you’re in a slump because of your condition. And this is definitely more than just a pre-seasonal fatigue …”
A long silence follows the captain’s words and you wish you would have left the changing room earlier tonight so you wouldn’t have to now eavesdrop on yet another conversation on Jeon's asthma that somehow worries you more than your own final exams and undone assignments.
“You need to learn to pace yourself through the game,” Hoseok suggests “Let’s talk about this before the next game, we’ll have to talk to a couple of midfielder guys to back you up. You’re our striker wild card, you get what I mean right?”
“Yes captain,” Jungkook finally speaks up “I’ll talk to the guys and we’ll figure it out.”
“Alright, go home and get some rest.” Hoseok pats the younger’s shoulder before heading out of the changing room
You quickly turn around and keep yourself busy to make it less obvious that you were listening to every single word across the wall.
“Thank you for tonight Y/N.” Hoseok calls for you and you turn to face him
“Anytime captain,” you salute the guy “How’s your ankle?”
“Pretty good,” he nods as he twirls his shin around “I can do with a bit of tape on the next game.”
“You know where to find me, Cap!” You nod reassuringly
“Thank, Oh and …” he smiles “I was meant to buy you a dinner for a while now. I still owe you for Jiwoo's party.”
“Lets keep that after the finals,” you offer “You can buy me dinner to celebrate Hanguk’s win as well!”
“Of course,” he laughs, his face lighting up at the prospects of his team winning “I should probably tell Namjoon we’ve got you on our side then.”
Your smile immediately fade and you furrow your eyebrows “Don’t you dare-“
“I’m just joking,” he laughs watching your reaction “your secret is safe with me” he turns around and opens the door as he waves “Goodnight.”
You chuckle at the guy’s childish remark, before getting back to the boxes that are waiting in the corner of the room for you to finish up. You grab another heavy box and groan as you reach at the top cupboard to place it in when someone hovers over your body and grabs the box and easily places them where you were intending to place them.
“So, you’re on our side huh?”
Your suspicion turns certain as you hear the guy’s familiar voice and you turn around, gulping as you realise the guy’s body is pressed against yours
“I didn’t say that,” you quickly interject “I’m with anyone who shoots the winning goal. And if that’s SNU then I’m siding with them.”
“Mhmm, So you wanna tell me you’ll be siding with Park Jimin,” He scoffs, as his tongue pokes to the corner of his cheek, “I doubt you’d prefer SNU’s 3 inch shooting his shots?”
“Jeon-“ you immediately speak up to interrupt his lewd words when he presses his index on your lips
“Once you get a taste of Hanguk's big boy shots, you’ll change your mind …” he hesitates as a playful smirk tingles on the corner of his lips “I don’t know if you’ve heard but we know how to play with big balls here."
“Of course, you do!” you roll your eyes mockingly
“Do you want me to show you?” He raises an eyebrow, taking on the challenge “The ball is on the table, babe” he chuckles, playfully placing an intonation on the words “you just gotta decide to play.”
“Jeon, I’m on duty!” you sigh pointing your eyebrows at the boxes across the room "I dont have time to play with balls!"
“Fine!” His face immediately drops and he loosens his body’s cage around you to allow you to move away with an annoyed expression but you don’t stay back to watch as you quickly walk to the rest of boxes.
“Shouldn’t you be home already?” you look back at him as you lift another box “why are you still here?”
“I’m sure you heard Hoseok hyung scolding me,” Jungkook sighs as he rest his weight on the shelf and grabs the box as you stop before him to place them on the top “Why do you act like you didn’t eavesdrop on us?”
“I d-didn’t,” you stutter as you quickly turn around to grab another box “I don’t know what you’re talking about!”
“Of course, you did,” He chuckles watching you struggles with the box in your hand “Aren’t you always waist deep in my business?”
“Fine,” you pout as you hand him the box, “I heard the conversation, but its not because I wanted to,” you sigh “Captain’s voice is now chronically loud after screaming at you guys on the field.”
“That …” he suddenly burst out laughing and you unconsciously smile along “is true, I can’t really fault you on that.”
You watch the guy’s genuine smile, spreading from his lips all the way to his cheek and then his deer-like eyes. You realize it’s the first time you see this smile adorning his lips, different to his usual cocky smirk he loves to throw your way.
“So are you just gonna stand there and watch me?” His lips curve on one side as he stands with his arms crossed
“What do you mean?” you ask in confusion
“I’m waiting for your two cents on my life,” He says in a mocking tone "dont be shy, Y/N!"
“I’m not that nosy okay?” You complain as you turn around, only then realising his sarcasm
“Oh you’re not?” He chuckles in amusement “You have more opinion on my life than my parents.”
“That is not true-” you respond defensively but immediately stop mid-sentence seeing his unimpressed expression “Fine, maybe I’ve been a bit nosy in the past. But I’m a changed woman now …” you say in a determined tone “I’m not doing that anymore.”
“Not doing what?” he steps forward, filling the space between the two of you “Hmm?”
“sticking myself into your life.” you respond nervously looking into his eyes
“That’s unfortunate,” he squints looking into your eyes “Because I decided to stick myself into yours …” he smirks “or shall I say into YOU?”
“Jeon-“ you warn and he immediately throw his hands up in surrender
“Fine, no more messing around!” he declares as he points at the boxes at top shelf “you’re done here right? Lets go!”
“Where?” you stop him and ask with a confused tone
“My place,” he furrows his eyebrows “You don’t wanna check my meds?” He asks suspiciously “If not then-“ his face immediately lights up in a teasing way
“No,” you immediately interrupt “lets go.” You say as you quickly grab your bag and walk ahead of him, hearing him chuckle behind you
-
You stare at the guy who walks to his mini fridge across the room and grabs a bottle of beer and waves it to you “Want some?”
“I’m good,” you quickly shake your head, knowing the last thing you’d want is being drunk in the guy’s room
“Alright!” he shrugs as he snaps the beer open and takes a sip, capturing your attention to his adam’s apple that wiggles between the toned muscles of his neck
Your eyes immediately drift around the room nervously trying to unsee the unintentionally lewd scene as you mutter “Where are your meds?”
“In the first draw,” he points at his nightstand beside his bed and you nod before reaching and opening the first dra
“OH,” you gasp, as you stare at the shiny packets of condom for a few seconds before looking up and making a momentary eye contact with him
“Like what you see?” He smirks watching you get all flustered
“You mean another reminder of your Golden reputation?” you mock as you scan through the shiny packets for his medication “can’t get enough!”
“you know now that you’re here …” he leans closer, his warm breath hitting your neck “We can put these and my golden reputation to some good use tonight!” he suggest wiggling his eyebrows
“Your medication,” you scold patting his shoulder “Can you put yourself to some use and find them?”
“Of course!” he nods with a chuckle as he fishes through the drawer and finally finds the ziplock bag
You sigh as you grab the ziplock bag and take out the device to check them as the guy climbs his bed and plops himself beside you on the soft mattress.
“Wow, you really haven’t even opened these!”
“Was waiting for you to pop the pandora’s box open for me,” he laughs as he raises an eyebrow “and maybe I can pop your pandora’s box open after!”
“In your dreams,” you flash a fake smile before taking out one of the devices “Have you used a DPI before?”
“if by DPI you mean dick pic invitations, of course!” he beams with a naughty smile “I always use DPIs to set the mood.”
“Dry Powdered Inhaler,” you pronounce each loud and clear for the guy “It’s the same medications but instead its in powder form.” You explain as you watch the guy in front of you yawn
“In other words It’s the same shit as the other one and I need to take it,” he nods “lets get this over and done with, I’m tired-“
“No,” you quickly wiggle the device away and hide it behind you “you need to know the difference so you can use it properly. Since this is powder you should take it differently.”
“Its not that deep, Y/N,” Jungkook deadpans “I chug it up my lungs and we can finally on more important stuff,” he pauses before smiling "like your pandora's box!"
“ I’ll just explain it very simple and quick," you state with a stern tone "just listen to me once”
“You see listening hasn't always been my strong point!” He shrugs
“Jeon! Please just once!” you ask with a frustrated tone
“Mhm let me think,” his pupils twirl around before stopping on you “why don’t you try teaching me like you did earlier today,” he smirks as he shift himself up on the bed, back resting on the bedpost as he man spreads his thighs “Coming close does help me listen better.”
You furrow your eyebrows, eyes travelling from his face to his thighs “If you pull one of your stupid game-“
“Don’t worry,” he throws his hands up “I’ll just be a good student, full attention on you and will listen like a good boy.”
“fine,” you murmur as you shift closer and settle on the guy’s thighs “after you put the inhaler on your lips, you see this button here,” you show him, without looking up “You need to press this so you can prime the device,”
“Uh huh,” he murmurs as he leans closer on your face trying to get a good view of the device “I press the button and then …” he says as his hand wraps around your waist, resting just above your hip
“A-And then you press again to release the powder,” you explain, trying to keep your composure as you feel his hands softly massaging the side of your waist “Since this is powder, you should take a fast deep breath in,” and you gasp as his hand wiggles under your shirt almost In unison with your instruction
“Uh huh …” he nods with a smirk, fully aware of the effect his sinful hands make on you “I take a fast breath in and?”
“then you need to hold your breath for 10 seconds,” you release the breath your holding, almost sighing as his cold hand soothes your skin “to allow the powder to settle in your lungs.”
“Mhmm,” he nods, continuing to touch you under your shirt as he murmurs “I think I got it,” he smirks as he leans closer to you, and you finally break your eyes from the device and look into his eyes “So I press the button,” he says and as the words leaves his lips his hands travel under the waistband of your pants, aiming for your core “to prime the device,” you gulp as his hand rest on your hip bone, dangerously close to your crotch “Then I press the button again,” he smirks as he reaches further down, thumb touching your clit and a small moan leaves your lips “and take a fast breath in right?”
He waits for your response with a pause as he continues to rub against your clit, slender fingers now reaching lower to spread your wetness around “then I just hold my breath for 10 seconds,” he suggests, watching you perform the exact instructions as you hold your breath under his touch “Right?”
“J-Jungkook …”
“Ssshhh,” he hushes your voice as he presses his forehead against yours “See how wet you are for me,” he smiles in satisfaction as he rubs your juices on your core "You want this as much as I do babe!"
“F-Fuck,” you gasp as he pushes a finger in your folds and your body tenses on his lap “Jungkook please …” you whine as you press your forehead against his collarbone
“Tell me what you want, babe” he instructs in a gentle tone “Remember, you just need to tell me!”
“Jungkook,” you gasp as your part your hooded lids, distancing your face from his shoulder and looking at his face, a playful smile dancing on his lips as he stares back at you with his darkened gaze, waiting for your response.
It takes you exactly 5 seconds to register what he’s doing and you immediately jolt away from him, forgetting about your awaiting climax
“fuck!” you quickly distance your body, settling back on his bed staring at him in a state of panic
“Hey, relax!” he says in an authoritative tone
“we shouldn’t do this- “
“why?” He raises an eyebrow looking at you “You don’t like it?” he asks with confidence all over his expression as if he’s challenging you to say you don’t.
You look at him, parting your lips to say something but nothing comes out. You can’t possibly lie through your teeth and say you didn’t like him knuckles deep in your pussy so you just blush and look away to his response.
“I-I’m sorry Jeon, let’s do the medication check another day,” you brave through the words as you quickly fix your shirt “I should probably go home-“
“No wait,” he immediately interjects, shifting on the bed to lock your body between himself and the mattress “Do you really wanna leave?” He asks, as he presses himself on your body, his hardened cock pressing against your thighs as he asks, “Even if I tell you I’m this hard just for you?”
“For m-me?” you ask, pupil dilating as you digest his words
“Can’t you see,” His eyes shine with lust as he tilts his head “That you’re the only medication I’d ever need?”
Your eyes widen as he leans closer and presses his lips on yours ...
#jeon jungkook#jeon jungkook smut#jeon jungkook x female reader#jeon jungkook x reader#jeon jungkook x you#jungkook x reader#jungkook scenario#jungkook x female reader#jungkook soccer au#bts soccer au#offside#daddychims#jungkook#jungkook smut#bts jungkook x reader
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Figure it out
Part four
Hinawa and fem reader
Masterlist here
The one with ✨ another song! ✨ And nurse 👨⚕️Hinawa!
I’m like that monkey at a type writer that people always say “even a monkey could write that” that’s how I feel with this lol but I like it anyway 😜
You wake up before him, slowly coming to consciousness as the sun shines into the window, your eyes flutter open and immediately look over to him, taking in his messy bed hair and calm face, a hand on his chest and one on his stomach. You watch him until you see him start to stir, then you take a deep breath and sit up, stretching out your arms and groaning at the pain and stiff muscles from your injury.
“Good morning sleepy head” you say when he sits up, he smiles “good morning” you smile at his morning voice, so low and raspy. “How do you feel?” he asks and you shrug “as good as i can post surgery with a stab wound. I don’t like that you were so overworked, but I’m glad I don't have to be here alone” he yawns and then smiles softly at you, his eyes still full of sleep as he gazes over at you “well, honestly, even if I didn’t have to be here, I still would come and stay by you if i knew you didn’t want to be alone.” you raise your eyebrows with a smile “you’d do that for me?” he nods and sighs, a soft sound containing all he feels about waking up and seeing you in the morning, makes him wish he stayed beside you when he slept in your bed. “of course i would. You’re important to me” he says softly and before you could discuss that any further nurses came through the door.
After their tests they tell you that Hinawa can be discharged and that you could as well if you promised to be on bed rest with minimal office duties for the next few months until you’re fully healed. You decided to take that offer because there was no way in hell you’d sleep in this bed another night, they gave you some as needed pain medication and a prescription for another month, with an appointment to get your stitches taken out in two weeks.
Back at the base you head towards the Captain’s office but Hinawa stops you “you heard them. you should go rest. I’ll tell Captain Obi” you’re about to insist you’re fine but he shakes his head, holding out your medication he was carrying “go, take some of your medication and rest” he orders and gently shoves you in the direction of your room and you huff before sticking your tongue out at him as you walk away, keeping your right arm against your middle so you didn’t move your stitches.
You stop by the kitchen to get some water and run into Maki, “oh Y/N you’re finally back! How are you?” “it’ll take more than a little knife to take me out” you say and laugh gently as you get yourself a glass of water “how long will you be out?” you take one of your pills before you say “a couple months, i hope less though” she nods “you should go rest but it’s my turn for dinner so it’ll be done in a few hours” you nod “okay thank you, see you later”
When you make it back to your room you lay down, the short walk strangely exhausting, you find yourself panting, your side hurting. “Okay, i’ll just lay here until my meds kick in, then i’ll get up” you close your eyes, trying to distract you from the throbbing pain, focusing on evening out your breaths, you didn’t notice when the meds kicked in because you were already asleep.
When you wake up again it’s dark outside, your clock’s lights reading 12:23am, you lay there for a moment, considering going back to sleep but your stomach rumbles and you groan, having missed all meals today you were starving. You slowly roll out of bed, the familiar walk taking longer because of your baby steps.
He was worried when you didn’t come to dinner, but he figured you were sleeping when your door was quiet, and figured he would make you a good breakfast in the morning. He woke up to your singing again, your voice from the kitchen vents
“It's nothing, it's so normal you You just stand there, I could say so much But I don't go there 'cause I don't want to I was thinking if you were lonely Maybe we could leave here and no one would know At least not to the point that we would think so”
He pushes off his blanket and quickly makes his way to the kitchen.
The lights are on this time, illuminating the hallway from the open door “And I couldn't tell, if anyone here was feeling the way I do But I'm lonely now, and I don't know how To get it back to good”
he walks in and smiles at the sight of you singing softly, heating up some of dinner with a metal bowl with your hands on either side, using your fire instead of the microwave. “Hey” he says and you look up at him from the counter you had used a chair to be able to sit on top of, “hey are you hungry?” you ask and he shrugs “i could eat” you laugh “perfect, I already have enough for you here”
You convince him to eat on the couch since you were injured, and he carries both of your bowls as you walk, he tells you everything you missed during the later afternoon and evening, the fights over dinner and the new information about the white clad. Once you’re sitting on the couch, he hands you your bowl and you smile up at him warmly “thank you Hinawa” he nods and sits next to you, his thigh pressed into yours leaving no space between you. He was warm and it was comforting, you found yourself leaning into him but didn’t care enough to stop, you were injured and medicated and needed some comfort from him
You eat in silence and when you are just thinking about how you needed a drink, Hinawa hands you a bottle of water. you didn’t question it, just took it with a smile. After you were done eating, you leaned your head against his shoulder and closed your eyes “when I was younger, I used to help out on my grandma’s farm in the Chinese peninsula. well one day i was messing around while working, completly goofing off, and slipped in some mud while carrying these 5 gallon buckets full of water with lids on them. i slipped and landed on the very edge of the lid. The edge went right between two of my ribs and cracked them. What was the worst was that one of the farm workers saw it happen and came to ask me if i was okay and I just popped up and pretended i was fine, i said “at least i didn’t spill the water!” and laughed And he gave me this like” you raise your head and look at him with a super worried face, causing him to chuckle “and he said ‘no sweetheart,who cares about the water. Are YOU okay?” you chuckle, the medication making your ribs only slightly ache, “I didn’t even find out my ribs were hurt until later, showing my grandma my bruises that night, it hurt to laugh for two weeks or so” you lean your head against his shoulder “you must have been a really tough kid” you smile and nod “I guess I was, but the actual reason why I told you this story,” you frown and bring your hand up, grabbing his shirt sleeve gently and turn your face further into his arm, your voice more muffled now “ this injury is going to take longer to heal than that one, which means less time I can laugh. And I love joking around with you every day, love that you make me laugh easily, I don’t want to have to miss out on that for a long time” he chuckles and lifts his arm, wrapping it around your shoulders and gently holds you a little closer “i’m sorry you wont get my amazing jokes for the next little while” you lean up and point at him “you have to keep telling me things! No! Don't stop. I will just control myself!” he smiles and you get a little embarrassed by your outburst “please, dont stop telling me funny things. Okay?” you whisper and he nods “okay, but if you hurt yourself and laugh i will stop right then” you nod quickly “deal! No going back on it!”
He laughs some more and you lean back into him, a smile on your face as you try and hold in a groan, pain shooting in your side from your wound, hoping to get away with it until Hinawa tenses, scooting forward and looking at your side with a worried face, thats when you notice the blood on his side and you gasp, looking down at yourself and seeing the blood spot against your white shirt “you might have ripped a stitch” he says and you sigh “fuck. Can you help me? I can't quite..” you hold your hands up and try to reach it to showing him how awkward it is, he nods “i’ll meet you in the bathroom for the better light after i put the dishes away i’ll grab the first aid kit and be right there” you nod and stand, wincing with the movement, thankfully Hinawa wasn’t looking and you sighed in relief. When you look up to himhe looks straight into your eyes “i saw that” he says and then laughs at your look “i’m not going to lecture you this time though, not unless you do this again” you nod and salute weakly “yes sir” he shakes his head and holds the two bowls stacked in one hand, his other resting on your lower back as you walk down the hall together, not moving it until you pass the kitchen and he leaves you to continue your slow shuffle by yourself.
You reach the bathroom and manage to maneuver your way up onto the counter top and once you do you look to the doorway and see him standing there, an amused smile on his lips “did you..?” he laughs “yeah, the whole thing. Im impressed with how determined you were, i could have just lifted you if you waited” you sigh and he comes over to you holding the first aid kit and an extra shirt
He looks at you for a few moments, you look back into his eyes without speaking, like you were lost in his beautiful golden orbs, until you realized he can’t help you with your shirt still on. You blush and look down before you use your arm on your good side to lift the bottom up over your head before pulling it down your other arm and holding it in your lap as you avoid eye contact now, suddenly feeling very self conscious.
He watches as you take off your shirt, the tips of his ears turning pink because of how soft your skin looks, of how gorgeous you are. He watches as you blush and shrink into yourself, watching the physical response of your self consciousness. “Hey” he says softly and you hum in question without looking up at him. He reaches out and with his first three fingers, gently tilts your head to look at him.
“Let’s fix you up okay? Don’t worry I wont hurt you” you smile at his warmth “I trust you Hinawa” he nods “good” he drops his hand and then washes them in the sink next to you before opening the first aid kit and slowly peeling off the bandage stuck to your skin with tape.
He dabs at your would gently with a wet washcloth as you hold your arm up, clutching your opposite shoulder so it’s out of his way. “it’s not bad, you won't have to go back to the doctor, you just need to take it easy and go to bed after i’m done” you smile as you study his face while he looks at your stab wound. He dabs it with peroxide, then puts on some neosporin so it won't stick to the gauze he places over it and then another bandage that he wraps around your middle instead of taping it to you.
“Is this too tight?” he asks and you shake your head “no, it’s perfect. Thank you for your help.” he nods “of course, here, i brought you a shirt” he hands you one of his extra black shirts and you thank him before taking it and trying to put it on. He watches as you struggle for a moment before reaching out, helping you unfold it and slip it up over your bad arm and then holds it as you slip your other arm through it, gently sliding the soft material down all the way, his fingers brushing across the skin on your back.
Once you brush your teeth and make sure you have everything you need, you lay in bed, him helping you get situated in silence. You watch him, a question in your eyes that you’re too embarrassed to ask “Do you want me to stay?” he asks for you and you smile shyly “only if you want to though” he smiles and then looks into your eyes “if i am being honest, I slept the best next to you than i have in the all of my adult years” you beam up at him “then you’re saying you’ll-” he nods “I’ll stay” your heart warms and your stomach floods with butterflies as he climbs into your bed beside you.
Because of your wound you have to lay on your side facing him, a smile on your lips and your eyes looking at his face as he lays beside you “you can’t sleep unless you shut your eyes” he says with a smirk, his eyes never opening. You reach out and grab his side, pulling yourself as close to him as you can and moving down just a little before you bury your face in his chest, he chuckles and watches you, waiting until you're comfortable before he gently wraps his arm over you.
“Tell me a story?” you ask and he sighs with a smile into your hair “real or fake?” he asks and you smile into his chest “you decide” he hums as he thinks “okay, ill tell you the story and at the end you can guess if you think it’s fake or real” he thinks for a moment before kissing the top of your head and beginning his story, his hand coming up to play with your hair that’s on the bed behind you
“There once was a prince of a small kingdom, he was handsome, intelligent, and level headed. One day the prince’s best friend was poisoned by a neighboring kingdom that was trying to start a war. The prince vowed then and there that he would never allow himself to care for another person again, never wanting to feel the same pain and grief again. He lived like this for many years, keeping his heart guarded, thinking he was doing the right thing” you were trying so hard to pay attention, forcing yourself to stay awake for this, it felt important. But the sound of his voice, the smell of him, and the warmth of him holding you, that fights to pull you to sleep.
“One day the prince met a princess, she came to stay at his kingdom and they became friends, laughing and joking with each other every day, she was the only one in the kingdom who seemed to understand everything about him without even trying. She easily walked into his heart and made it her home, walking through each wall and barrier like it was nothing, like it was her purpose to make him feel again. The only one who made feelings joyous instead of exhausting. She saw every hidden part of the Prince and made him feel worthy, she showed him how nice it is to have someone close to him who understands and doesn't make him feel guilty about where he lacks. The door in his heart opened for her like she had the only key.” you smile, thinking about how lovely the princess sounds. He swallows hard and his hand stills, strands of your hair twisted gently around each finger.
“The Prince fell in love with the Princess easily, even though he hadn’t felt the feeling for years she easily claimed all of his love as her own. She would sing to him, call him to her with her angelic voice. She made him laugh easily and not to mention she was an amazing person. She is kind, smart, and the prince is positive she is made of everything sweet and good. One day the princess got hurt.” Your fingers clutch his shirt gently as you whisper “oh no” he chuckles and kisses the top of your head before continuing “She got hurt and the Prince couldn't protect her. He felt terrible about it even though there wasn’t anything he could have done in the moment, he was tied up at the time. There was nothing he hated more than seeing her hurt and wished he could save her from it, but since he couldn’t, he would do anything he could to help her as she recovered. staying by her side and protecting her until she was strong again, until she was back to being able to protect herself. then he would go back to being her partner, and not just her nurse and guard.” You sigh and turn your face so your cheek presses against his chest “I like the prince” you whisper and he smiles
“Real or fake?” he asks and you hum into his chest, too far asleep to truly answer. You hum again and try to wake yourself up more but your mouth doesnt say what your brain tells it, it just mumbles out “my.. prince” before taking a deep breath and sighing into his chest, completely unconscious.
He wakes up with a start, panic in his heart from a dream he can’t remember. He looks down at you in his arms, a smile on your sweet sleeping face. You looked like an angel in his arms, the sun on the horizon hitting your window illuminated the back of you like a halo. He tried to move, to get comfortable again, but your unconscious hand gripped his shirt, and his heart. He was frozen to the spot, his heart racing thinking he woke you up, he waited a moment before looking down at you again.
“Maybe, if this happens again, we could sleep in your bed. It’s bigger than mine right?” you say and snuggle further into him, making sure you don't hurt yourself anymore, your wound was already throbbing and you didn't want to make it worse until you had to get up. He chuckles and kisses the top of your head “right” he clears his throat, the sun rising waking him up more, “you’d want to, do this again? Sleep beside each other?” you look up then, opening your eyes purposefully to look into his, “Hinawa” you reach up to cup his cheek “why wouldn’t i? You keep me safe. Do you think that these have just been coincidences? That it was just because you happened to be here?” you pull your hand down and furrow your brows “unless you don’t like mmm--“ you stop and change your sentence “ You don't want to. Then I mean yeah of course whatever you want I don’t want to make you uncomfortable” he smooths out your brows gently with his finger and he chuckles softly “shhh shh it’s not like that” he gently wraps his arm around you and holds you to his chest, his hand gentle against the back of your head.
A knock sounds at your door followed by Maki’s voice “sorry to wake you y/n but we have an emergency meeting in 5” you tense, knowing it must be big if they’re waking everyone “thank you Maki” when her footsteps retreat is when Hinawa lets you go, he looks into your eyes, he was sad you had to part so soon but he knew it must be important. “We’ll talk later” you smile softly and nod as he gets up softly and helps you out of bed so you didn't hurt yourself. At your door he cups your cheek with a smile before silently slipping out your door.
#hinawa fanfiction#hinawa imagines#hinawa x y/n#hinawa x you#hinawa takehisa x reader#fire force hinawa#hinawa x reader#takehisa hinawa fanfiction
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Kylo Ren X Modern! Male Reader
1/2
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|| Masterlist ||
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Summary: Reader lives on earth, far away from Kylo Ren and somehow he is able to see him one day during kylos training, he feels the readers force and tries to search for him but can’t. So, in order to find him he has to talk to him through the force.
Warnings: Force Sensitive, bullying, soft Kylo, slight angst.
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“Your shorter than I expected, but then again. I’m a little surprised on how someone like you can see me.”
He suddenly opens his eyes, waking up from the strange dream. He could hear the sound of chirping birds and the sun was shinning through his closed curtains. He turns his head to the left to see his alarm clock proped up on his nightstand. It read, 7:45AM. He doesn’t want to get up and he really doesn’t want to deal with anything or anyone today. He’s already struggling enough, what more could he go through?
“Y/n, it’s time to wake up!!” He hears his mother shout from downstairs. The older male groans in frustration and drapes the covers over his head, waiting for his mother to come and get him out of bed because their is no way in hell that he is leaving this amazing bed of his.
—
He groans once he’s forced down to sit on the dinning table with breakfast ready. “You were suppose to be up already, doctor said that you can’t over sleep when your on medication.” Said his mother as she walks around the kitchen, cleaning the dirty dishes and pots that she’s used the day before.
Y/n could only sigh and poke at his food. He wasn’t really hungry, he was never hungry in the mornings but yet again, he was always forced to eat something. “Is dad still in town?” He suddenly asks and shoved a forkful of food into his mouth, listening to the water run and his mother scrubbing off the disgusting food that stuck on the plates. “Yes, he’s still in town and I have to go too. So you stay out here in the country house and try to relax, remember the doctor said-“
“-said that I should spend some time out in nature to keep myself and my thoughts relaxed.” Y/n cuts in to finish off his mother’s sentence before leaning his head to the side and sighing again. “Can’t I just stay here alone without you or dad checking up on me daily? I’m a grown Man.”
“Twenty is an adult age but you don’t act like a grown man.” She cleans her hands and drys them off. She approached her son and reached out to gently stroke his hair, he could feel her trembling hands as he reached out to grab her by the wrist and gently push her hand away. “Just go to town with dad, I know that he needs you more than I do.” He whispered out.
He caught a glance of his mother’s smile but he avoids it.
“Please be careful and take your meds.” She says on last time before leaving the cottage, he hears the door lock and the sound of the car engine starting and driving down the road. Once the sound goes faint he stands up Harshly and grabs his plate full of food and dumps it into the trash can. He never eats his mother’s cooking or any of his parents cooking, he knows that they pour his medication into his food since he refused to take them awhile back. But now that he’s alone, they can’t stop him.
He makes sure to grab each bottle he finds around the house and empties them out into the sink with a frown on his face.
He was stuck here.
Ever since that voice came to his head it wouldn’t seem to go away and it was slowly making him go insane. Not physically but it was driving him crazy on just hearing that bickering voice speak to him, he’s tried many ways to cut it out but it always finds a way back in. He remembers when he told his parents and expected them to understand but that only worried them, causing him to meet up with a doctor and therapist.
They thought their son was losing his mind, which is why he’s stuck out here in the country side. His parents thought that it was best for him to stay away from the city and towns since he got into a fight with one of his college classmates for calling him crazy, he just lost it and suddenly attacked the poor kid but he didn’t regret it one bit.
His parents were keeping him locked away, they were afraid of him and yet they still try to help when he knows that theirs no way for him to get better.
Once he finishes dumping out all of his meds he tossed the rest of the empty bottles away. He makes his way around the cottage and heads upstairs to his own room to change properly and possibly go outside and take a walk around the woods.
“I Can sense you.”
Y/n was tying his shoes when he hears the voice again, causing him to freeze in place.
“But your too far away.”
He quickly shakes off the voice and brings up a wall that’ll block it out. He’s been teaching himself ways to keep the voice away and it’s worked a couple of times but his walls were never strong enough to hold.
He ignores the voice and finishes up with his laces before grabbing a jacket and rushing down the stairs, he makes sure to grab his phone and headphones before stepping outside.
The cottage was located on the out skirts of London. His father was born and raised here while his mother was born and raised in America, which leaves him. He was born in America but raised in London. He didn’t gain a heavy accent like his parents did and instead kept his mouth shut. He was the odd one of the family of three and he didn’t care, he was always alone and he’ll always be.
Once he plugs in his earbuds he starts to play some music, picking up a stick as he makes his way through the woods. He swings the stick around like a child would and continued to move up a small hill that lead him to a perfect view of the forest. He stood on top of the hill with a small smile on his face, the only thing he enjoyed in his life right now was this view. Everyday he would come up here only to relax and try and clear his thoughts if posible but today he somehow felt different. He felt a shift deep down inside of him, but what was it?
Y/n tosses his stick to the side and sighs. Listening to the music fade away into the background as he yanks off his earbuds and ticks them into his shirt. He enjoys the silence for a while.
“I can see you now.”
Y/n gasps and turns around to see a tall man all dress in black, he has his arms behind his back and he held a strong stern look. “Who are you?” He suddenly asks and slowly backs away from the stranger.
“You Can see me now, that’s good it took you awhile to clear that head of yours.”
The other chuckled nervously and shakes his head. “I’ve finally cracked, this is all in my head just my imagination.” He tells himself as he turns around to face away the man.
“This isn’t your imagination, this is real.” Said the dark tall Man. He was examining y/n, his eyes moved up and down his body and frowns. “I can only see you, but I can’t see your surroundings.”
“Are you supposed to see what’s around me?” Y/n asks and looks around, hoping that he was alone and that no one could see him talking to a stranger that could or could not be real. “Your strong enough to block out your surroundings.” He added which only left the other adult even more confused.
“Listen, I don’t know who you are and you don’t know who I am. Your just the voice in my head who’s finally taken a form to mess with me, I’ve already lost enough and I can’t let this continue on!” He shouts at him and reached out for his earbuds but notices that they are missing from his shirt. “What?”
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“I need a location for this.” The supreme leader hands the earbuds to one of his generals and waits for them to analyze it. “What are your trying to find?” Asked general Hux as he stands next to Kylo with a frown on his face as the other waits for the results. “I may have found another force-senstive but he’s powerful. I tried to communicate with the scavenger girl but instead I was taken to someone else. He doesn’t know that he has the force.” He explains to Hux before tilting his head to the side, feeling the others concern about this strange young man that he’s suddenly stumbled upon. “Wherever he is from, we can bring him here and I can train him.” He finally says.
Before Hux could reply the other general comes back and hands the earbuds back to the supreme leader. “Sir, these come from a planet that doesn’t exist on our maps. It was erased many many years ago.” She says and bites her lip. “What is the planet?” He asks. “Earth, sir.”
“Earth? I’ve heard of that planet before is located far away from our solar system and it’s forbidden for us to cross their atmosphere. I heard that the people that live on that planet are considered weak and selfish. They dont know how to control anything.” Said Hux with a grin on his face. He watched as kylo stares at the strange earbuds and puts them inside his own pockets. “Set corse to earth and get my ship ready.” He orders to the general.
“Are you mad? These people dont know anything about the solar system and how there are more things out here. They’ll easily detect you.” Hux follows his leader around the finalizer. “Then let them know, ill only pick up the boy and come back.” He reached his quarters and watched as the door slides open. Hux stops and stands just outside the doorway. “I hope you know what you are doing.” He said before the doors close in front of him.
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“I need new headphones.” Y/n tells his mother once she enters the cottage. “You what?” She tilts her head to the side in confusion and makes her way to the kitchen where she sets down the bags full of food. “My last ones broke and I need new ones, I dont care if they are the cheap ones I just need a pair to block out the voice...” he whispered the last part softly while avoiding her eyes. It’s been two years since he’s last made eye contact with his parents, he can feel their fear that he sometimes fears of even looking at them.
His mother sighs and placed a hand on her face in frustration. “Okay, I’ll go into town tomorrow and get you a new pair.” She says and turns back to put away the groceries. Y/n can only stand their and watch her work before he finally decides to speak up. “Why dont you go rest? I’ll put everything away.” He approached her and takes the bag from her hands and gave a small smile. She sighs sadly with a smile and nods, “Thank you darling.” She pats his shoulder and leaves the kitchen to allow him to work in silence.
Once she was gone, y/n began to take out everything from the bags and set them on the table so that he could easier and faster. “You seem to have a complicated relationship with your mother.”
Y/n gasps and jumps at the sudden voice. He turns around to see the same stranger standing in front of him this time. “Get out of my head.” He hisses out quietly not wanting his mother to hear him. The other chuckles and shakes his head. “I’m not in your head, you’re like an open book. You’re allowing me to see all of this.”
“What are you talking about?” Y/n walks pass him and began to put away the canned food into the cabinets. Trying to ignore the other, “You think that I’m a voice in your head but I’m not. This is real, its all real.” He held up y/n’s earbuds in his hand to show him that he wasnt hallucinating. “Where did you get those?” Y/n asks and reaches out to take them. Once his hand takes the earbuds back he feels the other brush his gloved fingers against his palm, causing him to flinch away. His eyes widen in fright. “How-?”
“I’m just like you.” He says.
Y/n licks his lips nervously and steps back. “If you aren’t an illusion than what are you?” He suddenly asks.
“I’m a human being like you; they call me Kylo Ren.”
Suddenly he’s froze in place with his eyes widen open as he thinks back to all of his previous dreams. He remembers seeing a man dressed in black, wearing a helmet and holding a sword that was a bright red color and it glowed. He could hear the crackling sound of the sword. He also remembers seeing multiple people dressed the same way. “The knights of ren.” He whispers out.
Kylo hears him speak those words and steps forward. “How do you know that?” He asks. How did y/n know about the knights of ren, he’s been trying to search for months and he hasn’t gotten anything from them yet. “I don’t, It was all a dream.” He replies back to kylo and grips his headphones in his hand and shakes his head. “I’ve been having dreams like that for days now but I tend to ignore it. It means nothing to me.” With that he turns back to putting away the groceries, once everything is away he makes sure that the kitchen is clean before he began to heat up some water for his tea.
“You can’t ignore these visions.”
“Visions?” Y/n laughs out and grabs a mug from the sink. “These aren’t Visions, they are dreams.” He states.
“In those visions, did you see yourself?” Kylo suddenly asks as Y/n stares out the window and sighs. “No, I only saw a group of people dressed in black while wealing weapons but there was one that held a very peculiar sword. It was red and it glowed, I remember hearing it turn on or something it was strange.” He shakes his head and hears the kettle go from. He walks over to the stove and removes the kettle from the hot surface and began to pour himself some tea. “But like I said they aren’t visions but dreams.” He turns around to see Kylo staring at him with a strange look on his face which only left the other staring back in confusion.
“What?”
Kylo slowly speaks. “You’re mother, she’s watching you.”
His eyes widen at the mention of his mother. He turns around in one quick motion to see her standing by the entrance of the kitchen. Her eyes were red and full of tears as she stared at her own son. “Mom...” he could feel her emotions.
She was fearing and she was upset, the man in front of her wasnt her son anymore but a stranger to her. “Mom?”
“She cant see me.” Said kylo which only worsened the situation for y/n. His mother jus taught him talking to no one which only makes things worse fo him. “You’ve lost it now.” She says all of a sudden causing y/n to flinch at her words.
#kylo ren x male reader#kylo ren#star wars tros#stars wars#star wars x male reader#adam driver#ben solo x male reader#ben solo
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Thoughts on S10xE12: THE WEDDING
Okay so y’all know how this is gonna go. A lot of tears. A lot of screaming via caps lock. And of course it wouldn’t be complete without a lot of “I LOVE YOU SO MUCH” and pet names for Mickey. Enjoy.
Let’s get non related gallavich things out of the way because I don’t wanna finish this on a downer
I actually love Liam/Frank scenes
Debbie finally getting what she deserves? Good
Tami is a fucking bitch
Entitled little brat
You won’t change my mind about this
Don’t even try defending her
You NEVER use someone’s child against them.
Don’t threaten to take Fred away then be shocked that Lip ruined his sobriety
I just kept repeating “please no” when he paused before taking that first sip
It fucking hurt so much
Lip deserves BETTER
Tami is toxic. End of. Period.
Now let’s bring up the mood!!
Liam looking at the tuxes was so cute
He’s so confused
Mickey actually chose a white tux for himself :((((((
My snow angel🥺
Everyone checking on Ian is so sweet
Carl’s toe nail clippings “you picking those up” 😂😂😂
Ian really hates that shit doesn't he
I'm so proud of him for taking his meds
GIVE ME THOSE PHOTOS
"Savings" lmao
Baby got fancy for his wedding
HIS FACE I CANT😂😂😂
They shower together :((((
“Those are nice right?”
Fashionista Mickey making another comeback
Unpopular opinion but I love seeing his Ian tattoo on his chest ON THEIR WEDDING DAY
chin touch :(
So soft. So sweet.
THE WAY IAN GRABS HIM YES BITCH
THE GRUNT 🤤🤤🤤
HEIGHT DIFFERENCE FUCK
MICKEY IS T I N Y!!!!
TOWEL
NECK KISS
FUCK
I fucking hate terry
I need him dead because my baby isn’t safe until he is
His little “what?” 😩
HE DESERVES SO MUCH BETTER
GET HIM BABY
But like don’t because I need you free
Can sandy poison terry or something?
Sandy 😂😂
This scene was sad because my poor baby but so early shameless I love it
Carl and the beer trilogy 😂😂😂
“I don’t wanna get married where my shoes stick to the floor”
GIVE THE PRINCE HIS ROYAL WEDDING
The spinal cord line 😂😂😂
Mickey’s a Gallagher I don’t care what their last name is
HERE COME THE TEARS AGAIN
“Why is Mickey handcuffed?”
“Terry fucking wins again” NO BABY
MY FUCKING HEART
ILL GIVE YOU ALL THE HALLOWEEN CANDY TO FILL YOUR LITTLE TUMMY BABY BOY
I WANNA BUY YOU ALL THE CHRISTMAS GIFTS YOU WANT
LET ME ADOPT YOU
IM SO FUCKING SAD FOR HIM
HE DESERVES SO MUCH BETTER
“I love you. I love you” 😭😭😭😭😭
“This son of a bitch is never gonna let me be happy” IM SOBBING ALL OVER AGAIN
In so little words Lip really said “Mickey Milkovich deserves the wedding of his dreams and we’re gonna make it happen if it’s the last thing I do”
Did anyone else start singing Carrie Underwood when Ian said “Louisville slugger”
The Gallagher’s love Mickey so much
I LOVE MICKEY SO MUCH
IAN FUCKING LOVES MICKEY SO MUCH
“Mickey might have to marry Debbie instead of Ian”
“Nice polish boy named Michael” LMAO
I love Lip
OKAY THIS SCENE KILLED ME
The way Mickey is looking at Ian melts my heart
Again their height difference murdered me
YOU WANT KIDS?
K I D S
IAN WANTS KIDS WITH MICKEY BUT WE ALREADY KNEW THAT
FUCK HIS DREAM FROM THE ICONIC DELETED SCENE IS COMING TRUE
IF THEY DONT HAVE KIDS NEXT SEASON IM RIOTING
I like when they make fun of each other because they are literally best friends forever
THEIR SMILES
MILKOVICH
GALLAGHER
BUT WHICH ONE IS IT NOW
Ian is obsessed with holding mickey’s neck
THUMB
MY BOYS LOOK SO HANDSOME IN THEIR TUXEDOS
Mickey trying to be nice to this lady 😂😂
I LOVE HIS VOICE
They have mutual friends and I’m fond
I told y’all it’s the little things that get me
“Chiavari chairs look nice” “I like how the gold catches the light” DONE
The cake topper I NEED IT
I HATE TERRY I HATE TERRY I HATE TERRY
The lip and Ian scene made me cry again
THE SONG
IAN YOU SAP
HE LOVES MICKEY SO MUCH
As soon as I heard the first cords of the song I IMMEDIATELY bursted into sobs
IM CRYING AGAIN
MY LONELY DAYS ARE OVER 😭😭😭
Once again I’m beyond jealous of sandy
I wanna walk my baby down the aisle 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
HES SO CUTE FUCK
IM HONESTLY NOT OKAY
THE NIGHT I LOOKED AT YOU
I DIDNT KNOW THIS SONG WAS GONNA HURT SO MUCH
HEIGHT DIFFERENCE AGAIN IM SO BLESSED
It’s like even more noticeable this episode right?????
TINY AND TALL
BLACK HAIR AND RED HAIR
BLUE EYES AND GREEN EYES
WHITE TUX AND BLACK TUX
TOUGH AND SOFT
THEY COMPLIMENT EACH OTHER IN EVERY WAY POSSIBLE
Kev was so funny finally
GET HIS HOMOPHOBIC ASS GAY JESUS SQUAD
When they kept singing even after he pulled his gun I cried so hard
I’m crying again wtf
THE VOWS FUCK
TO BE MY HUSBAND
IM FULL ON UGLY CRYING I CANT EVEN SEE THE SCREEN
I IAN TAKE YOU MICKEY TO BE MY HUSBAND
FUCK THIS HURTS SO MUCH
AFTER ALL THE SHIT THEYVE BEEN THROUGH THEYRE GIVING THEMSELVES TO EACH OTHER IN THE PUREST WAY POSSIBLE
“Now?” “Yes now” HE WAS SO EAGER AND SHOCKED THAT THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE SINCE HE WAS A KID IS NOW HIS HUSBAND
We got to see the smitten lovesick Ian Gallagher from s1 again
HES NEVER STOPPED BEING SMITTEN AND LOVESICK BY MICKEY
Honestly same
Not gonna lie, seeing frank emotional made me even more emotional
MICKEYS SMILE COULD LIGHT THE WORLD
MY SON IS ACUALLY MY SUN
THE HAND HOLDING IS SO CUTE
THEYRE ACTUALLY MARRIED
HUSBANDS!!!!!
IAN SO PROUD HAVING HIS BABY ON HIS ARM
YES MICKEY IS IANS BABY FIGHT ME
IM SO FUCKING HAPPY
MICKEY DANCING IS THE CUTEST THING IVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE
“I miss mom” that hurt a lot more than I thought it ever would
I’m glad they mentioned Monica. Ian loved her so much
YOURE REALLY GONNA PLAY PERFECT RIGHT NOW FUCK YOU
“I should probably go dance with my husband” THATS YOUR HUSBAND CAN YOU BELIEVE IT
The head neck tuck 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
THE WAY THEYRE HOLDING EACH OTHER LIKE THEY NEVER WANNA LET GO
“We were just kids when we fell in love not knowing what it was I will not give you up this time” FUCK WHOEVER PICKED THIS SONG YOU WIN
I actually hate this song with a passion but suddenly I love it
LIKE THEYRE ACTUALLY SLOW DANCING
SLOW DANCING AT THEIR OWN WEDDING
IAN REALLY HAD TO DO THE NECK GRAB WITH THE THUMB RUB COMBO JUST TO KILL ME DIDNT HE
THEYRE SO IN LOVE IVE NEVER SEEN A LOVE THIS DEEP BEFORE (and I’m fucking married to the love of my life/high school sweetheart lmao)
Liam getting the car for them was the sweetest thing
He opens the car for Ian :((((
HE HOPS INTO THE CAR MY LITTLE BUNNY
Frank is genuinely happy for them and that fucks me up so much
THEY REALLY HAD TO USE RED SHEETS HUH
THEY KNEW IT WOULD FUCK US ALL UP EVEN MORE THAN WE ALREADY ARE
The soft touches are always my favorite
They make my heart flutter
“Morning Mr. Gallavich” OKAY SAY WHAT YOU WANT BUT THAT WAS ACTUALLY REALLY FUCKING CUTE
“Morning Mr......Millogher?” THE CUTENESS WONT STOP
Mickey physically cannot stop caressing Ian
THE THUMBS ALWAYS GET ME
Like I actually look for them knowing they’re gonna be doing the thumb rub
Fucking terry
BUT THEY LOOK SO CUTE COVERED IN FEATHERS
There Mickey goes again with the Ian caressing
in case you forgot: THEYRE MARRIED
HUSBANDS
I can’t believe this actually happened. They’re actually MARRIED. After everything they/we have been through....wow. I’m still in shock. I’m still crying my eyes out. Now I’m gonna go cuddle up with my husband and make him watch the episode with me since he finally has time. I’m over emotional. It’s not fair that they wait until I’m pregnant to let Mickey be happy. It’s like they enjoy my uncontrollable sobs. Leave me your thoughts! I wanna talk about this episode forever.
#mickey milkovich#ian gallagher#my tiniest son#my giant son in law#weekly thoughts#weekly recap#Mr. Gallavich#Mr. Millogher#shameless s10 ep12#10x12#noel fisher#cameron monaghan#gallavich#gallahitched#shameless#shamless s10#shameless season 10#liam gallagher#lip gallagher#carl gallagher#debbie gallagher#sandy milkovich#terry milkovich#tami tamietti#idiots in love#ian and mickey#ian x mickey#mickey and ian#mickey x ian#s10
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Just One Sneeze
(I dont know if I’ve posted this before, but who cares)
The Avengers were in the remodeled Avengers Tower, which now served as home base rather than a base of operations. The team had received a mission request from Hawkeye, who had gone undercover for SHIELD already.
Tony Stark was... sleeping. Passed out, head draped back over the arm rest of a couch in the living room. That being said, he would be ready to jump up and fly out at a minute’s notice... or a few.
Steve was in his room, getting on his suit for the mission. Tony had worked up at least something for everyone. The suit he wore today had a pretty neat camo ability. It would be his first time wearing this suit; he was looking forward to it.
Bruce and Thor had just come back from new Asgard, and were working on some legal work in the living room as Nat was following a hard core yoga video on the tv.
Captain America came out of his room all ready to go, but was disappointed by his team not doing anything.
''Alright, team! Chop chop! Hawkeye needs us!"
Thor mumbled and waved a hand, then continued working.
"In a minute, Cap." Bruce held up a finger, distracted helping Thor understand Norwegian laws.
Nat only looked a side eye at him and smirked at his misery.
Tony just snored in his sleep.
Steve sighed. ''Oh! Avengers, Assemble!" he tried, but didn't get a better response.
Suddenly, there was a thump on the window but when Nat and Steve looked over, there was nothing.
"Come on, guys. I know it's not super Hydra level threat, but still! We gotta get out there!"
There was noise by the terrace again, and this time they watched Peter Parker stumble in.
"Hey guys!" He said cheerfully despite the swollen, punched look on his face. "Oh, that was me before, by the way. My senses were off somehow and I slammed into the window."
He laughed it off as Cap and Nat watched him in confusion.
Tony had stopped snoring.
"Well, time to call me Pigeon boy, I guess," he scratched the back of his head.
"So, where's everyone going?''
"I was trying to get them off their butts and go help Hawkeye, but doesn't look like they're in the mood for it!" Cap said saltily as he crossed his arms in disappointment.
“Oh, cool! Can I... Ahchoo!”
Steve dropped his arms and snapped his attention to Peter.
Nat turned her head from an impossible pose to look at Peter.
Bruce and Thor finally moved their faces from the papers to look at Peter.
Tony woke up suddenly, looking around until his gaze landed on Peter.
Peter had his eyes closed during the sneeze and when he opened them, everyone was looking at him.
He took a quick turn peak behind him to make sure they were looking at him.
Yup
“Wh-what did I do?!”
“Oh my god, Pete!” Tony was the first one to run at him, leading the the others into a stampede, freaking the spider-kid out.
“How long have you been sneezing for, Kid?!” Cap tried to get his hand on him while Tony pulled and prodded his face.
“Itwushzhusttheo...” Peter tried telling him.
“I knew you shouldn’t be allowed at night!” Nat shouted in the melee of voices. “Do you have any idea how cold it gets in New York at night?!”
“Quick, Banner. Do something! You’re a doctor!”
“Not that kind!” Bruce whined.
“Move!” Tony ordered as he picked Peter up and laid him on the couch.
“I’ll get more pillows!” Steve announced and ran to his room to get more pillows, knocking with Nat in the way.
“I’ll get a blanket!” Nat told them and went towards her room to get a blanket, but not before crashing into Steve on the way there.
“I shall fix the temperature!” Thor verbally adjusted the thermostat before he went out to fix the sky.
“I’ll get you some soup!” Bruce went off to get soup from the kitchen.
“Miiister Stark, really! I’m fine! Lo prometo!” Peter attempted to speak out in his defense, accidentally practicing his Spanish.
“Bruuuce! It’s getting to his head! He’s not speaking English!”
“I’ll get a cold compress!” Bruce shouted back a reply from the kitchen.
Steve came back with as many pillows he could hold on his person and dropped them on top of the couch.
“Mmm!” Peter struggled under the many pillows on his face.
“The child cannot breath!” Thor noticed, at least.
“I’ll get my inhaler!” Steve agreed and ran to the med bay.
Peter took a long drawn in gasp when Tony removed the pillows.
“Here, sit up!” Tony pulled him up just a bit so he could fit some pillows behind him. “It’ll open your lungs more in this position.”
Nat finally came back with a weighted blanket and Tony snatched it from her to put it on Peter.
Bruce ran back with a bowl of cold water and a hand towel, spilling water on his way to the couch.
“Dr. Banner, really! I’m fine! Look guys... ohhhh that feels nice. Yeah.” Peter melted when Tony put a towel on his forehead.
🕸4 hours later🕸
Fury was waiting crossly at his base for the Avengers to get to where they were supposed to be, but he got no communication from them. On the other hand, he was getting plenty communication from Hawkeye, who was alone in the field. Fury sent him agents for backup and called the Avengers’ backup.
The Tower living room was complete chaos when Dr. Strange stepped through the portal. Like if a baby was left with untrained adults.
“Congratulations to the... new parents?” Stephen joked as he came around to where they were.
“Dr. Strange! Help!” Peter cried to Stephen as the Avengers surrounded him.
There were unnecessarily extra pillows and blankets, and dirty paper towels dropped by the couch. Soups and liquids of different colors lines the walls.
”What... happened here?”
“Ah! Finally a doctor!” Thor greeted him, barely bothering to remove the pink stuff from his face.
“Who’s sick?”
“Peter was, babe! Look, he’s burning!” Tony pointed at the kid wrapped in blankets and towels.
Stephen sighed and walked over to Peter, but Tony made no effort to move.
“Can I... see my patient please?” Stephen motioned for Tony to move aside.
“Yeah, sorry.”
Tony moved and Stephen took his place.
“So... What's the issue?”
“He was sneezing.” Steve told him.
“It Was ONE snEEZE!”
“He swung into the mirror!” Nat told Stephen.
“I was distracted!”
“He’s burning!” Thor added.
“Notice the million weighted blankets!?”
“The sweat on his face!”
“He’s throwing up!”
“He was a rabbi!”
“He was...”
Stephen pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed as he took himself and Peter to the mirror dimension.
“Wanna tell me what happened?” Stephen asked as he moved the blankets off the kid.
“Okay, can I be honest?” Peter asked, quickly taking the opportunity to stand up. “Yeah, I was sneezing when I swung into the glass. But WHO doesn’t sneeze once in a while!?” He said, exasperated.
Stephen nodded along.
“And then I made the mistake of sneezing inside and everyone was all over me!” Peter paced around the couch.
“Cap dropped a million pillows on my face and I couldn’t breathe. Widow wrapped like a million blankets on me and I was sweating, duh! Then Thor made it cold and I sneezed again. Dr. Banner got me cold compresses, thence the sWeAt on my face.” He pointed at his face and laughed dryly.
“And they actually tried to give me medicine! I’m. Not. Sick! And it was gross! Of course I’m going to not take it. And Thor is only the god of Thunder, not the kitchen. I wouldn’t recommend. 0/10.”
“Great, now that’s settled then.” Stephen got up from the couch and magically cleaned Peter to look brand new again.
“Wanna go on a mission?”
“For the love of god, yes! Anything to get me away from the Avengers.”
“Good,” he smiled over his shoulder and returned them to the real world again.
“So? Is he going to live?” Banner asked as they all anxiously looked at him.
“Oh yeah, he’ll live. He’s good to go on a mission.”
“Oh, yeah! The mission!” Captain America remembered.
Stephen followed Peter out to the terrace.
“Oh, no. Spider-Man’s on a mission. YOU guys, have a new mission: clean this place up.”
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TUA Power HCs Part 1!
Luther
Discovered them at age 3 (He was the first)
He accidentally broke one of their nannies fingers
Had trouble controlling his strength (still does)
For personal training Reginald first made him build up his body
Because just cause he had incredible strength, didnt mean his body could take said strength
He used to accidentally break his arms when he used too much strength
They always healed fast though
As if they never broke to begin with
Baby Luther used to hide the fact that he broke/sprained/bruised his arms, legs, basically any part of his body because he felt like a failure whenever he got hurt
Later in life (maybe at 10?) Reginald discovers that Luther not only is super strong but also had super endurance
(Special Training was not fun that year, Reginald wanted to see how long he could last without food, water, air, shelter, etc.)
After that year, special training was a mix between building up his strength (weight lifting heavier and heavier objects every week) and building up his endurance (running around the room carrying a crap ton of weights, carrying a really really heavy weight and Reginald seeing how long he could carry it before his body gave out)
Diego
They first discovered his ability to breathe underwater first
Diego unlike his sibling absolutely adored bath time as a child
He would stay in the tub for hours if he could
One time his nanny had to leave him in the tub because one of his siblings was having a tantrum
She comes back to a sleeping Diego
Who's asleep in the tub
submerged in water
Was lowkey jealous of his siblings' powers while growing up
Reginald was so disappointed in him for having such a "useless ability"
Poor baby took it into heart :(
Special Training was awful before he found out his secondary power
Reginald wanted to see how long Diego could last underwater (he discovers Diego could last an indefinite amount of time down there)
He stopped liking water after that
He finds out about his secondary power at age 6
He likes to help Grace in cooking and usually cuts up the vegetables for her
He gets really good with the knife
So when Reginald demands he learns to wield a weapon he immediately chooses the knife
At first its was all stabby stabby but then one of his siblings goads him enough to rashly throw the knife at them
His aim is perfect. The knife is sailing through the air, going exactly where he wants it to be, except he wanted it to be in their head and oh god Diego panics, he didnt mean to throw that knife he never meant to hurt his siblings and he loves them and -
The knife is sailing towards his sibling's head and then it suddenly curves
Diego runs up to his sibling and hugs them and apologizes
Diego never wanted to pick up a knife after that
But then through some persuasion (Allison), he forgets the incident and picks it up again
Special training is all about accuracy and precision. All about moving targets, really tiny targets, living targets
Reginald wanted to know how much he could curve, what could he curve and all that jazz
Diego learns Physics because its an absolute must
(He learns how hard he has to throw for it to curve that much, how fast it needs to be to keep in the air even after it curves, how heavy should the knife be if he wants this specific result)
At first its hard and because he can curve anything he likes through pure instinct why does he need to learn Math?
But Reginald wants him to be as accurate as possible
(He motivates Diego by putting Mom and his siblings in situations where one false error could lead to their deaths)
He learns physics quickly
(Five and him bond over physics, Five helps him, He helps Five until Five gets too advanced and well...)
He actually gets super good and can do equations on the fly
People are constantly surprised at the amount of math needed for his powers
Allison
as a kid had absolutely no control on when her powers would activate
it would activate all the time leading to a lot of accidents
one time she snapped at Klaus to stop talking and he couldnt speak until she was able to reverse it
Reginald decided the best way for her to control it was through trigger phrases
she went through a lot of them because it wasnt cool enough for her
there was "listen up", "somebody once told me" (someone always interrupted her, usually Klaus, with the world was gonna roll me so she dropped it after like 3 uses) and a bunch more before settling on the iconic™ "I heard a rumor'
early on she learned that she had to be very precise with the wording or else the rumor wouldnt turn out the way she wanted it to
so special training was mainly focused on her wording, her pronunciation, and her learning other languages
allison is fluent in italian, french, spanish, mandarin, filipino, somali, she also can speak in a bunch of other languages but isnt super fluent
allison was actually pretty ok with special training until she was 10
thats when reggie brought in actual real life people
until that point she had only rumored her siblings (reginald actively encouraged it as long as he wasnt the one who got rumored) and occasionally the businessmen who came over to talk deals and shit
reggie was smart and only brought in people he was sure no one would miss, homeless hobos, drug addicts, people who lived by themselves and didnt have much family or any family at all
at first few meetings, she could stomach the feeling of wrongness
it was still easy for her to reason that what she was doing wasnt really wrong after all the commands she was issuing were really mild (like i heard a rumor you stubbed your toe, i heard a rumor you could play the piano perfectly)
they were just testing the reach of her powers
(could it rewrite your brain? create illusions, hallucinations? make you gain talents you never had? make you feel things?)
(reginald already knew her rumors could affect the memory, no need to test that, same thing with if her rumors could affect herself)
but then the more they pushed the boundaries the darker the rumors, the harder it was to stomach this sense of wrongness that threatened to swallow her whole
(could it override survival instincts? could it fake relationships? could it wreck relationships? can the human mind take multiple rumors at once? how about multiple conflicting rumors? how many rumors does it take to break the mind?)
its a lot easier to deal with special training when you cant remember
(but in her dreams she cant forget, she wakes up screaming, absolutely terrified and cant remember why)
Klaus
at first thought everyone could see the ghosts
actually he thought they werent ghosts cos they didnt appear to him with their death injuries
realized they were dead people when he accidentally walked through them
at first the ghosts were ok (they were mostly the nannies vanya killed so they were nice) they were loud and sobbed really really loud all the time but they didnt actively seek him and so he didnt actively seek them either
he still didn't like his powers even back then when they werent as bad as they are now
since he didnt really have any interest in his powers, reginald forced him to use them more, to explore them
klaus really didn't want to talk to any ghost so Reginald locks klaus into the mausoleum for the first time
this is where everything goes to shit btw
Klaus is absolutely terrified because these ghosts arent like the ghosts in the mansion (the nannies)
these ghost were malicious and horrible and they were dead for so long that they lost any sense of self or humanity in them
this is where klaus develops his fear of the ghost and his powers
this is where klaus loses a grip on his powers and it causes horrible repercussions
he sees the way they died now
and it terrifies him even more
from ages 8 to 11 hes facing the full force of his powers whenever hes trapped in the mausoleum
every session his fear gets worse and worse
the ghosts appearance actually reflects on how he feels about them actually
thats why ben and dave dont look awful
and why the rest of the ghost do
klaus loves ben and dave
he's absolutely terrified of the rest of them
he discovers that drugs numb their abilities when one of them gets hurt badly during training and is on really heavy pain medication
maybe it Five who broke 5 ribs when sparring because luther forgot to control his strength
Five couldn't jump at all when he was on those meds and he hated it
but Klaus? the moment he put two and two together he jumped at the opportunity to temporarily get rid of his powers
he would purposely get super banged up during training just to get rid of his powers and it scared the living shit out of his siblings
they ask him to stop and he does, he doesnt like it when he scares his siblings
but the ghosts get too much and klaus is severely tempted to fuck himself up to get that sweet relief that the pain meds provide
he stumbles upon Reggies alcohol cabinet and discovers that while getting drunk doesnt exactly cut off his powers it gives him this buzz that makes it a lot more bearable
he discovers drugs when he sneaks out one night to get more booze
he starts off with weed and gets hooked
the ghosts are always worse after coming down so he scrambles to get high as soon as possible
he doesnt try anything harder until ben dies
after ben dies he spirals
TUA Power HCs Part 2 is coming up in a bit, ask me if you wanna get tagged for it :)
#tua#the umbrella academy#umbrella academy#tua hc#headcannons#tua luther#luther hargreeves#number one#00.01#spaceboy#tom hopper#tua diego#diego hargreeves#number two#00.02#the kraken#david castaneda#tua allison#allison hargreeves#number three#00.03#the rumour#the rumor#emmy raver lampman#tua klaus#klaus hargreeves#number four#00.04#the seance#robert sheehan
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Amplified Emotions
Word count: 2,184
Warnings: None
Request: Hi! How about a Newt x reader where WCKD sends up a serum that makes emotions WAY stronger, the gladers don't know what it is so reader volunteers to test it, but she has a bad crush on Newt, so anytime she feels any emotion it's amplified by an extreme amount. They first notice it when she gets REALLY mad at something super small and meaningless, then she starts bawling when Chuck gets a paper cut, then she can't stop following Newt around and blushing. Ends with a kiss?
A/n: I dont really like how this one turned out but whatever
You sat staring at the blonde boy across your breakfast, he sat a table away laughing with Jeff and the other med-jacks. A strand of his dusty blonde hair hanging in front of honey brown eyes. His pink lips curved into a bright smile.
“Yo, y/n, you awake?” Minho asked waving his hand in front of your face.
“Uh y-yeah sorry. Just tired.”
“Well you better be ready for today, your gonna run the C section and then meet us up towards D.”
“Got it.” You sighed breathing in the humid thick air which would for sure make today's run sweaty and gross. You stole one more glance at Newt before standing and dumping your empty plate in a wooden bin.
So far no one had caught on to your feelings and that was a good thing. You had always been good at hiding feelings and you weren't very emotional at all. You also knew that if your crush was exposed to one gladder, the rest would know in a matter of hours.
You trudged down to your hammock grabbed your pack and walked to the opening of the maze waiting for Minho. Once he arrived you began to run. Your mind filled with images of blonde hair, brown eyes and the sharp jawline you have grown to love. When you met up with Minho and Caleb you listened to them banter a bit about the maze before you reached the glade a few minutes before sundown.
As you walked in you saw the whole glade clustered around the cage. You ran up to the crowd pushing your way to the front to greet the greenie.
What you saw shocked you. A young boy who couldn't be older than 12 sat in the cage. You had never had a boy that young before come up. His face was pale and his eyes wide as his forehead beaded with sweat. Gally was currently in the cage, unsuccessfully trying to get the kid to calm down.
“Gally!” you shouted, “back off.”
He stepped back as you jumped down into the cage landing with a thump as the cage rattled around you.
“Hey kid,” you started trying to keep your voice calm. “You're ok just come with me and I'll get you out of this hell hole surrounded by idiots.” you smiled.
“Where am I? What's going on? How did I get here? And who are you?” He gasped.
“Look I know you have a lot of questions and I will answer you when you come out here, ok?”
He seemed to calm a little bit, standing and making his way toward you.
After showing around the kid you now knew as chuck you went to see what was up with Clint, you hadn't seen him since breakfast.
“Hey Clint,” you said as you walked into the medical room. You furrowed my eyebrows as you saw, Alby, Minho, Zart, and Newt along with Clint and Jeff clusters around something.
“Oh um hey y/n.” He said glancing up at you then back to the group who had all turned around.
“What's up?” You asked walking closer. You caught a chemical sent as you neared them.
“We have a bit of a problem,” Alby spoke up, his eyebrows knitted together.
“Oh, what is it,” you asked peering into the box they were surrounding.
“ Well whatever these are came up in the box and we aren't sure what they are used for.”
“There's no label?” you asked as you examined the dozen or so syringes in the box filled with a red liquid.
“There was nothing,” Newt said. You tried not to let the gaze he held on you quicken your heart but you had no such luck.
“Maybe we should get someone to test it?” Zart suggested, his blue eyes scanning the reaction of the crowd. Alby bit his lip, Minho shrugged and Newt looked up in shock.
“No way!” He exclaimed, “what if it's dangerous?”
We all turned to Clint and Jeff wanting an explanation.
“Umm, I think that Zart is right,” Clint suggested, earning an agitated scoff from Newt.
“ Newt, it could be a new and improved cure or something to help us get out.” Alby agreed, nodding.
“Alright,” Newt sceved, “then who is willing to try it?”
Everyone went silent scanning the room. You sighed, “I will.”
Newts eyes went wide. “No way!”
You huffed, “Newt, I'm the least important in this group, if I die or something I can be replaced, but the leaders,” you gestured to the group, “cant.”
“Are you saying you're expendable.” Newt gasped.
“No just more expendable than you. Plus who said I was gonna die, it will probably do nothing.”
Newt started at you opened his mouth as if to say something then turned on his heel and stormed out of the room. You sighed and turned to the rest of the group sticking out your arm.
“Let's do this.”
When the liquid felt its way into your bloodstream it felt warm and fuzzy then ice cold then just gone. You waited for everyone's eyes wide in anticipation.
“You feel anything?” Minho asked eyebrows raised.
“Nope.” You answered.
“Ok maybe it was just a dud, just take it easy for a while ok?” Jeff said
“Got it.”
The day went on somewhat normally that was until Chuck got hurt. By hurt I mean he got a tiny cut from a knife while helping the slicers. You're a usual small bit if empathy was suddenly magnified and you felt your self sobbing. Chuck along with everyone else stared at you as you choked out more sobs. It wasn't just that though when Caleb through a cheesy pick up line at you, you got so infuriated you slapped him. But that wasn't even close to the worst of it.
When you saw Newt your heart felt like it was going to fall out of your chest and your breathing became heavy. You felt your self flush bright red as he neared you. It didn't help that he ran his hand through his extremely soft locks and it definitely didn't help that he had taken off his shirt while working showing his perfectly sculpted abs shining with sweat. You swear your soul left your body when he approached you.
“I still can't believe you took that bloody stuff.” He muttered as he stood in front of you. You could function. You just stood there. Your eyes trailing over his body your checks growing warmer and warmer. You gulped.
“Look I'm sorry I stormed out I just didn't want you to get hurt” Newt continued unfazed by your behavior.
You just stood there mouth open staring at him blushing more and more feeling your hands grow clammy.
“Hey, are you ok?” Newt asked concern flashing his face.
“I'm f-fine” you managed to stutter out. Still gaping at him.
“You look flushed, are you sick? Did that shucking thing do something to you?” He stepped toward you leaning his hand on your forehead checking your temperature. His touch shot sparks through you as you leaned into his touch. “Y/n we should go to the med-hut your burning up.”
“I'm ok,” you said feeling your heart die as he pulled away from his hand.
“Alright just tell me if you feel sick ok?”
“Got it,” you said dreamily.
“See you at dinner.” He said walking away.
“Yeah,” you said quietly.
The rest of the day you spent following Newt around. You watched him work while pretending to be busy preparing something or fixing clothes. You would blush profusely when he neared you and you would feel yourself fall into his brown eyes at his mere glance. At dinner you found yourself falling into Newt as you watched him laugh at Monhos stupid joke. Just watching him you felt so in love. The infatuation of him grew within you and you couldn't not be around him. As you watched him you suddenly felt a tap on the shoulder.
“Uh, your staring,” Chuck said.
“No, I'm not.” You countered your eyes still trained on the brit a few tables away.
“You're still doing it.” He pointed out.
“Shut up” you muttered
“You like him don't you?”
“No, I don't”
“ Then why are you still staring at him”
“Look he's just super hot ok?” You bit your lip.
“Ewwwww. He is not.”
“He so is” you swooned. All of a sudden he and Clint started towards you.
“We'll just test it out ok?” Clint whispered
“I just feel bad.” Newt answers.
“Hey, Newt.” You said in a haze.
“Hi y/n.” He greeted awkwardly
“Hey so y/n, how are you doing,” Clint said sitting opposite you.
“Good.”
“You're not sad at all?” he asked raising his eyebrows.
“ No why?”
“Well, you can't run tomorrow,” Clint said.
“What! Why!?” Your disappointment turned to sadness and sadness to despair. And you were bawling again.
“I swear, I have never seen y/n like this, she had never even batted an eyelash at something like that before that shucking serum,” Newt said as he wrapped a gladly accepted arm around you.
“So I guess it amplifies feelings?” Clint said as you three walked back to the med-hut.
“Yeah but that still doesn't explain why she gets all blushy and mushy around me.” Newt pointed out.
“Actually it does,” Chuck smirked.
“W-what?” Newt looked confused.
“Yep, bet she was just really good at hiding feelings before this.” Clint chuckled.
“You're trying to tell me she likes me?” Newt asked.
“ From a medical standpoint, it is the only answer.” Clint jeered
“Shuck face,” Newt muttered but he still could feel the blush creeping up his neck.
The next day you woke with a pounding headache and memories of yesterday flowed through your brain. Then you remembered Newt, watching him, blushing, ruining the perfectly good act you had kept up for almost a year.
“Shruck, shruk, shruk shruk!” You yelled anger pricing through your stomach.
“You okay y/n?” Jeff asked.
“I'm fine” you groaned.
“You can't run today.” He stated waiting for a reaction.
“Whatever that shit wore off ok.” You groaned.
“Sorry about that. By the way, Newt is looking for you.”
You groaned again, “How marvelous.” You drawled sarcastically.
“I think he's in the gardens,” Jeff said
“Thanks” you stood up your warm feet meeting the cold floor of the med-hut. You tucked in your shirt and did your best to calm your disheveled hair as you made your way to the gardens.
When you saw him your heartbeat quickened and you felt yourself grow nervous.“Hey Newt!” You called with all the courage you had left in you
“Hey y/n, I'm guessing that bloody thing wore off then?” he said walking toward you
“Yup” you answered halfheartedly.
“Well umm,” Newt scratched the back of his neck stopping a few feet in front of you. “Clint said that judging from the symptom it like amplified emotions or something?”
You felt crimson wash over you. “Uhh yeah, it did. And listen I know this is gonna be really awkward now and I'm sorry but I guess you told me not to take it.” You laughed dryly.
“Why would it be awkward?” Newt questioned
This time you just stared at him, “Uuuhhhh ‘cuz you know I like you.”
Newt grew red, opening his mouth closing it than saying, “Who says that it will be awkward.” He took a step toward you when he did.
“Like everyone is going to make it awkward you know, plus bow everyone is going to pick on me because of it and you will get teased too.” You pointed out trying to get him to see the facts, “when someone likes someone who doesn't like them back and everyone knows it tends to get awkward.”
Newt sighed, “y/n, for being so smart you really are dumb sometimes.”
“Newt, I don't get it why would-”
“Bloody hell,” Newt muttered before leaning forward and placing his lips on yours. The kiss was sweet and soft, his lips danced on yours gracefully. You could taste a bit of salt and strawberry from Newt's lips. He placed his hand on your waist as you moved your hand through his blonde hair.
You pulled away gasping for air, face flushed and lips swollen.
“I like you too shrunk face ” Newt whispered placing his hand on your face. You giggled.
Your moment was interrupted by a large sigh of annoyance. You both turned to see Minho his pack on his back, holding yours.
“I'm going to have to deal with this every day aren't I?” He muttered although you could see him smile a bit.
“Shut it.” You groaned grabbing your pack and kissing Newt in the cheek. “See you later.”
“Bye y/n” he sighed. Before he pulled you back in for an actual kiss making you drop your pack and raise your arms around his neck as you he slid his tongue into your mouth.
“Ewww guys come on.” Minho groaned. Earning a certain finger from you.
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