#dont send me to a mental hospital please

[waitingroomchair]

when Esha Tewari said :

I can move on

I can be the person you want

I can be everything

I can be anyone

I can be anything

Just tell me now

Cause i can

i truly felt that

[shamelesscoward]

Please someone tell me what also hears Tylor sing

[chocopupcake]

What if....w-what if we k1lled people in the woods together l-like creepypastas??~ (•\\\\\\•)

[xullianspamnoham]

Thabk you.

Unrelated but if you think about it everyone is someone's oc

??????? What like in real life orr

I refuse to be my parent original character, but they sure as hell treat me like an oc.

[uglytrannymess]

I was just beaten, stabbed, and shot all in just the matter of a few days, each day a different incident or attack by an individual in my family and outside of my family by ppl around me, I had to get several stitches in my legs, arms, hands and even some in my face after being jumped and beaten and stabbed, I had a bullet pulled out my leg and my side, I was shot 8 times, 4 times in the legs and 2 times in my right lower abdomen and another 2 times in my left lower abdomen, I been in and out of the hospital including the mental hospital for suicide attempts as well as being harmed by transphobic ppl, I've been struggling paying for costs of a vet visit after my kitten was killed by my moms dog after she had her dog kill her, I've been raped, molested and abused by my family and ppl in my schools and neighborhood and I just get tired of being in this same situation surrounded by poverty, I live in a neighborhood where I'm constantly threatened for being a black trans woman and I have NO ONE TO TURN TO, I've tried getting help finding a new job but it's harder after constantly being fired for molestation at work and sexual harassment and constant work abuse I've been thru whether it was employees or managers targeting me with harassment and bullying within the workplace and it's been hard in general trying to get help with financial situations, paying for medical bills and get med assistance from the government and the city as well as mental health help for therapists, psychiatric help, and safe space havens or shelters, I've also been from mental health facility shelter to homeless shelters and been harassed, abused, raped and molested in EVERY SINGLE ONE, i am currently living in a rundown home surrounded by poverty and bad conditions, rusted bursted pipes, i have no plumbing, no water, no way to get anything to drink, to clean stuff with, i dont have water for dishes to be cleaned, laundry to be washed, or to bathe or shower in or to take a piss or shit in either and there are several dead cats in my basement as well as raccoons from all the holes in the walls, I had to freeze in the winter and was trying to get help from the city with some government assistance and I'VE YET TO GET ANY HELP, ANY THERAPISTS FOR MY MENTAL HEALTH I'M STILL ON A QUEUE, I HAVE NO HELP FOR MENTAL HEALTH MEDS, OR PSYCHIATRIC HELP, I can't seem to afford to get help with much even after succeeding my Gofundme goal because I had to use most of that money for food for me and my cats and keep cleaning products to get my home clean WHICH IS STILL A MESS. so what i need anyone to do for me if yall POSSIBLY CAN, is reblog this as much as you can and please share my links to donation help with pet food, water, meds, med help, mental health help, finding an apartment, getting a bed or mattress, and any daily needs and necessities IF YALL CAN.

My goal is to get at least $2500 to $3000, I know it's alot but rn I need as much as I can possibly get, yall can send anything, nothing is too small it's ALL APPRECIATED. IF PPL CAN SEND AT LEAST 25 OR 30$ EACH IT WOULD HELP OUT SO MUCH, BUT AGAIN ANY AMOUNT IS APPRECIATED. THIS is REALLY IMPORTANT!!....I'M TRYING MY BEST TO SURVIVE RIGHT NOW!

Cashapp: $Slasherstan91

Venmo: Negrophiliac (I know the name's wild 😭)

Chime: $MarsRayL

Paypal: paypal.me/MarsRayL

[stanfordswifey]

"I'll be here for you, my love"

Ford Pines x reader

You've been in the hospital for 5 years straight, your cancer developing and spreading. The tumor you had ignored had now developed and evolved, spreading to your organs, causing your stage 1 liver tumor to evolve into stage 4 metastasis.

Just yesterday the doctor walked into your room quietly, it was unusual. She had some news to break to you. "I'm afraid you only have a couple more days left. I've told you this before but its any time now, i'm sorry." You smiled at her, noticing the tear falling down her cheek and frown mentally, keeping a fake strong facade. "It's not your fault. I'm glad you tried your.best and never gavs up on me." Your hand curls into a ball under the sheet, doing your best to sray strong. The doctor left soon after, leaving you alone in the room with only your thoughts, your brain wandered 'will i tell ford?' 'Will he be okay?' 'I hope he's going to be fine without me'

You stared mindlessly at the ceiling, thoughts and memories rolling around in your mind like a film for a movie, you curse at the solidarity of your life, eventually falling asleep. You felt pathetic, worthless even, knowing that your husband too busy to even worry about you.

(You eventually fall asleep and wake up the next day)

It was another dreary day at the hospital, the sight of white boring walls and minimalistic decor making you lose your sanity by the minute, not having anything to suppress the agonizing pain you felt in your body.

-ford's pov-

"It has been a while since I last visited them at the hospital"

He murmurs, to no one but himself.

You've been gone for so long, off he visited you time to time, but ultimately focusing on the portal more and more to distract himself from worrying about you too much.

As he was working on his portal, his phone suddenly rang, causing him to jump at the sudden sound, rolling his eyes as he pushes himself away from the table (yk those chairs w wheels he basically just rolled over to the phone LMAO).

He accepts the call, ruffling his hair in frustration.

"Ford Pines here, who is this?"

"Ah, sorry, I'm doctor may here, what is your relationship to (reader)?"

He hums, fidgeting with a machine part with his fingers

"I'm their fiancé, what's wrong?"

The doctor clears her throat on the other line,

"I'm sorry to tell you, their tumor has started to spread to numerous other organs, I fear they don't have much time left.."

Ford feels his stomach drop, his hand loosening.

".."

"I suggest you get them out of the hospital and just spend time together, I'm afraid there isn't much we can do now. It's best to spend time while they're still here"

"..I see, thank you doctor."

The call ended, he immediately drops his phone and covers his face with his hands, tears falling down. They really couldn't do anything now. He didn't know what to do.

That night he spent his time sobbing, thinking of ways to help you, looking for a cure, a remedy, anything to help you, he failed miserably.

After a couple hours of thinking it over and breaking down he decided to pick you up from the hospital and spend time together, if you couldn't be there for the entirety of his life, atleast he'd be there for yours.

A/N

Hi hi!! This was shitty! I havent written anything for a while T~T please do send me some ideas/requests or if I did anything wrong plz do comment it down, also English isn't my first language so It's not perfect, this will be like 2 or 3 parts? I dont know yet but I will update :33 thank you again for reading <33

[angeledeggs]

I understand If this is out of your comfort zone, but would you be willing to do the main 6 and the courtiers seeing self-harm scars on their partner?

Course! Sorry I havent been updating, y'all 😭😭 I know I've said this but I PROMISSSSE I will update more, I just need more time okay okay I'll updatemore I swear and please dont hesitate to send requests, it really does motivate me :)

Asra💜:

Of course they're concerned, but they don't quite know how to bring it up

They don't want to embarrass you or, dear gods, make it worse

If they're old scars they'll feel a bit better but if they're fresh he definitely feels more pressed to ask about it

And finally, when Asra does, he makes sure to do it gently.

No yelling, or tears from them or anything at all to pressure you, they just want to know if there's anything they can do to help.

If there's something specifically triggering it they'll definitely throw that shit out, but if it's a person they'll definitely make sure they do not bother or upset you ever again.

If it's something mental, of course they'll never, even be mad at you. They'll help you any way he can.

Julian🦠:

The first time he notices he immediately asks.

Of course he's definitely not angry or joking or nothing, he just has to quickly make sure you're not hurting at the moment.

He'll not get mad at all or anything, he just needs to know that you're not bleeding an that nothing has gone too deep to be cause for a hospital

He'll do whatever you need or want to help you whether the scars are fresh or not, whether that's talking about it, not talking about it, or doing anything in between.

All in all he supports you no matter what, and will support you in whatever way you need.

Nadia💙:

She's worried, she won't lie.

She knows they're just scars, it might not have even been inflicted for years... but still.

Of course, she still cares, but she doesn't want to micromanage you, you're grown and can make your own decisions.

But at night when you two lay together she can't stop herself from glancing at the scars, wondering if you're hurting on the inside and she's doing nothing...

One day, she just blurts it out, asks if you're alright, if anyone or anything has made you hurt yourself recently.

No matter your answer, she'll support you, and reassure you that of course she would never hold anything against you for being human, naturally.

She loves you more than anything, after all.

Portia🧡:

She can't help herself, just like her brother, she immediately asks about it.

She just wants to know if you're hurting right now, if you've been hiding your pain, if she can help.

She's not going to pressure you at all, but she might get the slightest bit emotional when she thinks about it.

If she can help whether the scars are new or old, she definitely will.

At night she might even say a few mumbles Hebrew pairs, begging g-d for your happiness, your health.

But she will always, always, always love you with all of her heart.

Lucio👑:

He tries to keep silent for awhile.

He doesn't want to make you angry or sad or maybe even happen to hurt yourself so he just stays quiet. He can't help but wonder, though. What if you're sad? What if you're depressed? What if your scars are new and fresh and he hasn't noticed?

He just mentions it softly one day, ready to back out of you can't handle it, ready for everything that could happen.

He just wants you to be happy, and if you don't want to talk about it, he won't, no, he couldn't even imagine attempting to force you to talk about something you don't want to.

But he'll stay with you no matter what your answer is, whether it's crying or silence or screaming. You're his partner and he cares for you, so, so much.

Valerius🍷:

He drops his wine when he sees. He can feel his breath quickening and you hadn't even realized he saw anything when you look at him and, god, he can't look at those eyes of yours without being driven insane.

He asks immediately, tearfully, if you're okay. That's all he wants, god, he'll be happy as long as you're okay.

He'll never be angry at you. But he might cry. Just slightly. But it's still the first time you've ever seen his eyes water at all.

He'll do anything he needs to if you need to feel better, if you need a therapist, food, drinks, medical care-- he has a large supply of money and you deserve it more than anyone, he cares not the cost.

At the end of that night, he might hold you a bit more tightly. And he shudders at the feeling of you skin, breathes your aura in.

Vlastomil🐛:

Horrified, immediately.

While he won't make a scene because he doesn't want to upset your or anything, he does ask you when he thinks your calm and won't freak out.

But of course, if you happen to freak out, he'll definitely be able to handle it whether that means staying or leaving you alone.

He's not angry at all if the scars are fresh or old, you're still the love of his life either way.

If you need something to help, or lots of somethings, no matter what it is, he's going to get it. It doesn't matter how, what matters is you.

And he loves you.

Valdemar💉:

Their breath has not quickened for so long, for a moment they can't even name the feeling that is running through their cold, dead veins.

Worry.

When you catch a look at them, you're concerned. They've never looked at you like that before.

But suddenly they're dropping to their knees before you, clinging to you, eyes wide and horrified.

Their voice is breathless and soft when they speak to you, when they softly reach for your face to caress the curve of your face, look into your eyes.

They haven't spoken so softly in years. They really do care.

Whatever it takes, they'll give it to you if you need it, dosent matter if it's medicine or stim toys or anything else that could help.

And they don't mind getting rid of anything or anyone for you, either.

They don't plan for anyone to hurt you. And they don't change plans.

Volta🍰:

Bursts into immediate tears.

She's always been an emotional woman, and while she is so quick to tears under normal circumstances, she cries the hardest you's ever seen.

She can barely explain herself, and only manages to when she's finally calmed down, as she tearfully asks you, are you okay, are you okay? Are you bleeding? Are you upset? Do we need to talk?

But she quickly manages to compose herself, to hurriedly wipes her tears. She doesn't want both of you to panic, after all.

She'll definitely make sure to comfort you if you need it, and if you start crying, she will manage to hold back tears long enough to comfort you.

But she'll always be loving towards you, not mad, barely upset, and definitely not at you, just at the world, and she makes sure to help if you need it and give you whatever you need.

Vulgora⚔️:

Their heart is racing like their first fight.

It's been years since their heart has raced fast enough to pump their veins with the bad sort of adrenaline, with the horrific feeling of fear.

But they manage to keep calm. The only outward showing of their distress is the slight tremble of their hands as they grasp your own, eyes on your face, not your scars, just you and those eyes.

Whatever happens, if you relapsed, if you hurt yourself again, if you never do it again, they will never ever be angry. They'll always be there for you.

They're your partner, after all. It's engraved into their own ethics now to give you anything you wants whether that's time apart, time alone, more things, less things or anything else.

And they love you just the same no matter what.

❀

[peachyhoolagan]

I call these “dont let my mom see this again i dont want to go back to the mental hospital :)”

-

I’m doing a study!! Who wouldve thought. Anyways, im taking requests! If anyone has a favourite SWR screenshot that they would love to see done in this style please send it to me or add it to this post. If anyone does submit i cant promise ill do all of them but i can try!!

(Also please let it have some kind of dramatic lighting!! I love rebels use of lighting and i want to do more with it!! Thank you!)

[lilacs-echoing]

hii making an intro post now bc ive posted a lot of stuff

just call me lilac(s) i dont really care lmao but i dont like online strangers using my real name

a couple fun facts about me:

my interests might change a lot rn this is a lotf blog tho

i am a huge literature nerd and i will overanalyze

ive committed cyber crimes in the form of stalking and harassment by pretending to be other people to gather harmful intelligence. sorry if this scares you however i AM in therapy sooo

i dont like publicly disclosing my disorders on intros/bios if you want to know that gleam it from my reposts :3 or ask i guess?

one of my hobbies includes dressing myself up as a clown in my freetime

i used to play genshin and i mained amber mostly out of spite but also because i love her. i have a shrine for her and a baron bunny stuffed animal (which i take with me every time i go to the mental hospital because it has compartments that i can use to steal things!)

i listen to a lot of dad rock tbh except rn my top artist on spotify is magdalena bay because i had a manic episode and got really into them.

i might post my art and stuff however i do experience the horrors and sometimes it keeps me from drawing so dont expect me to finish art <3

i also write my own stuff it might be obvious from my posts but i dont write fanfiction. idk maybe if people appreciated my writing i would write fanfiction lmao

i will accept mutuals if i think ur cool however im trying not to make online friends. might change but for now im not giving out contact info just message me on here if you want to LMAO

PLEASE send asks im surprisingly not mean and i love talking <3 thank you!!

[criticallydreamingz]

i had to put some thought into this but like. as someone who was hospitalized due to one of my sysmates, i do feel a deep wish that DID was portrayed in some way in SC

im not gonna comment on tebbot(? was that the name i dont remember....) bcs i feel like that convo abt the character was done to death the moment it happened ngl

but like. to get personal for a sec, roughly two or three years ago(? i actually dont remember bcs of how much thats been clouded for me) i went to a hospital and had intensive therapy for about a year after. i wont specify what for, for the privacy of my sysmate. and the truth is, we were not treated well! they approached us from an angle of general mental health and did not adjust care needs to suit someone with DID. there was a lot of language used in later group therapy that would suit singlets and just confused us more bcs we didnt know what to say or do to fit into the mold that was being set up

and after that is when i found SC. and part of us resonated a lot with those early parts of the comic bcs that dismissive attitude reflected by the doctors and nurses in SC hit close to home.

and look everyones DID is different hence why im not speaking on the one character but like! idk. i think i just want more general DID rep, especially in mental health focused works like this. sure our communication is much better so we dont have situations like that anymore, but yk what i hated? i hated coming out about my DID bcs i was scared theyd send us back to the hospital for it. thats the kind of elements i felt like i would see in SC.

tldr: just some well written DID please, a sliver of rep.

(though, at this point i feel im better off making it myself)

[puppytummy]

i literally do not know how else i can try to get help i have tried everything i can . i tried therapy i tried help lines i tried crisis center i tried my doctor i waited a year to see a psychiatrist for nothing ive been in hospitals i tried talking to a teacher i trusted 6 years ago. i even tried asking my parents for help. ive tried killing myself multiple times and i got no help besides making sure i was alive and sending me back home with no resources or way to move forward only so i can suffer more. i was hoping maybe i could try antidepressants again and maybe ask for more but no my doctor now just laughs at me and hangs up. i have tried every option i have begged for help. im tired of people telling me to just keep going no matter what this is not worth it. i dont want to suffer forever for no reason i just want help but i dont deserve it or something and im thinking maybe i should just try to kill myself again because its not like i have anything else to try and my life only continually keeps getting worse in ways i cannot control even when i try my best. at the end of the day even besides my mental issues and everything my life is still completely unbearable. even just in like the past month i still lost my long time job i loved and my closest friend and i still live in this house where i am not allowed to leave my room or do anything and i am still unlovable and ugly and i have almost no friends and all i can do is sit here and see other people have everything i have ever wanted and needed. what is the point. like why should i keep living i dont understand why everyone hates me so much but wont let me die. im so tired of trying only for it to always get worse and hurt more. i dont even know how to try anymore. and i dont want to. can i please kill myself

[destinyc1020]

i dont know where u disappeared too but i hope everything is alright and ur just busy. We miss you on here, just let us know if your okay. whenever u can.

Hey there Anon....

Thank you (and other Anons) who've asked about my whereabouts, I definitely appreciate it. 🥰🤗 If I haven't gotten to your msgs, please don't take it personally.... 🙏🏾 I've just been under a LOT of stress lately. 😔

My mom actually had another really bad cardiac episode last week and had to be hospitalized for over a week. In fact, she JUST got out of the hospital yesterday (thank goodness). 🙏🏾

She ended up needing to have stents put in her heart because some of her arteries were 90% blocked. 😱💀

Needless to say, it's been a REALLY stressful period of time for me, so tbh I haven't really felt like blogging or being on Tumblr much until things died down. Thankfully, my stepdad flew in, so I've been getting some much-needed assistance, and my mom is doing MUCH better now. Hopefully she won't be having anymore chest pains or needing anymore procedures for a while. 🤞🏾

All I have to say is thank the Lord for all you medical professionals out there who study, go to school, and get your degrees, because you all have been a God-send during this difficult time. 😭

That Dr basically saved my mom's life and prevented her from suffering a MASSIVE heart attack (cuz that's where she was headed). 😔

Anyway, I'm just so GRATEFUL that my mom lives to see another day.....❤ I can't even imagine what it would be like to lose her. 😔

Lastly, all I'll say is, PLEASE take care of yourselves (physically, mentally, emotionally, etc.), appreciate the good people in your life, and practice KINDNESS whenever possible (it's always possible) . We never know when our day on this earth could be our last, or when our loved ones could leave us. 😥

Love,

Destiny💜

(So thankful and so grateful. 🙏🏾)

[c0tards--s0luti0n]

UHM, I need help understanding the whole John being mentally ill/having spent time in the hospital type shit...

I knew that he wa there because of the Amy stuff and self-loathing becuase of it, but I was watching all the Chapter 2 endings and the note that was talking about his delusions and him "knowing Ms. Martin was there with him" rlly confused me?? is the entire game taking place as a delusion/inside his head??

You seem quite the educater, so if you have time, please knowledge-ify me thabsks :]]]]

note for reference , in my interpretation of the institution the whole thing is the doctors not believing him and making him feel like hes crazy . part of his trauma from the institution was nobody believing him and him doubting his own memories because of that , evil spirits and the paranormal are very certainly real in the faith universe . i personally dont think the whole game was in his head because of me personally just not liking "it was all a dream/hallucination" endings and i dont think it really makes sense . i have absolutely no fuckin clue what "somehow, john knows that she is here with him" means . i would say it was paranoia but shes confirmed to be there by the doctor i have absolutely zero clue . + youre welcome i love talking about my inch rests ...... feel free 2 ask about anything if youre confused or anything just send me somethang :33 !!!

[abixsupernova]

// !!VENT POST!! // DO NOT READ OR INTERACT IF YOU ARE GOING TO SPREAD HATE //

theres been something on my mind that some people might find disturbing or unsettling, but i have to share it.

whenever i listen to music or saved audios on tiktok i walk or run around when i do so, for most of the time i have to be in constant motion to properly imagine things. but that is not the only thing

i have been doing this since i was a kid, i imagined myself in animation memes, movies or even myself as a youtuber or tiktoker (basically a celebrity) but ever since my reputation in school got ruined, i felt sick and ashamed so i found a character that i can portray my own personality, my own interests and problems onto. so after the WORST week at school of getting bullied and teased to the point where the only thing i could do is lay down on the desk and cry because i knew that if i asked a teacher for help and told them about the popular kids bullying me for my interests and style, it wouldnt end up good. my mind always told me not to because they might say something false about me or might tell the teacher about a bad thing ive done a long while ago. i would come back from school crying and i wouldnt come out of my room once not even to get food or water. the whole situation has left a REAL deep scar in my mental state and for 6 months i have felt burnt out and i couldnt take proper care of myself, i couldnt sleep and had a messed up sleep schedule, i couldnt brush my teeth or brush my hair properly. i felt scared because i knew they had my home adress, they were saying real bad stuff about me in their discord groups and servers that theyd purposely send me invites to just ot harrass me and make fun of me, they have made me insecure about my chest, my stomach (not perfectly flat), my thighs and hip dips. so after all that i found a character that would represent me (even if they werent even a little similar to me) my struggles and interests, and no, im not posting as them, i dont think that i am them, though i cant imagine myself as a cool person anymore, knowing that no one i know thinks im cool, but i think that the character is cool. I feel ashamed of myself so instead of thinking about myself, i think about them. i know this explenation is not exactly what im feeling, and i cant currently find words for it, but i will update the post if i find a way to express.

also im sorry, its not something i usually post, and im sorry if i made anyone uncomfortable or disturbed, i feel really bad about what im feeling and i am scared that people will see me as weird or mentally ill, or think of me as a psychopath or someone that deserves to be put in a mental hospital. i had to say it tho. and i feel disgusted for doing so but i hope you will understand.

ALSO, i will be giving more details soon about the whole „portraying myself as a fictional character” thing that i currently cannot really put into words since this post has been more of a dump about what happened to me at school, so i hope you are all doing okay, bye (im not gonna k!ll myself though, the whole thing happened A REAL LONG WHILE AGO)

ALSO PLEASE TELL ME IF YOU WANT ME TO SPECIFY WHAT CHARACTER I PORTRAY MYSELF ONTO OR NOT

[mortuaest]

Large rant, sorry. Please ignore if any of the trigger warnings are going to be an issue. I need to get it off of my chest because if I rant on FB I get hit with a character limit and I should make a personal Tumblr which I think I have but dont remember shit about.

Ive been having severe, and I mean severe as fuck mental and emotional breakdowns because of the fact that its literally been almost a year (Its going to be a year October 29th) since I've had to put down Ice Cube, my ESA of 14.5 years. He had cancer in his cheek and it was placed right to where it would effect his quality of life severely negatively if we tried to surgically take it out, and he would possibly die on the table if we did it because of his age, and he was declining (He wasn't eating, he was drinking, he really wasnt eating as much as I wanted him to, he was spitting back up the pills I was giving him, he was suffering) and my mental and emotional health has been severely suffering each and every day that passes without him.

I have another cat, I got him in April, thinking I was alright. Which I was I guess. Im being reminded via FB memories and just my own fucked up brain wanting me to join him to where I'm legit giving myself until December 31st, 2023 to have someone. Anyone give me a fucking sigh to keep on living. Im going to be going through a program my friend suggested to make a will, making her I forgot the words she used but shes going to make sure that my will is listened to and Albert Whisker, the cat I have now is taken care of.

I cant keep on living, and the fact that this heartbreak is fucking me up so badly to the point where the large baggie of medications (ranging from insomnia medications to Very STRONG painkillers and such, as well as my daily medications the day of me going to attempt) is very tempting to take now. And I mean very tempting. Meaning I almost took it yesterday, after my first mental break and me physically hurting myself by slamming a brush ungodly hard into my head because I legit believe I deserve everything that has happened to me (The physical, emotional and mental abuse that I got for 20 some odd years from my mother, the severe car accident from last year, the rapes, everything. My friends being murdered or dying around me, loosing the only thing that even brought light to my life).

No one in my life cares. No one seems to care. Ive been severely struggling and each time IVe even bothered to reach out for help via friends. Since my father hates me for being trans and my sister doesnt give a fuck to even bother to help me. My mother was the cause of my two rapes/sexual assaults in my life and wants me dead because Im autistic. No one wants to help, or no one seems interested in even keeping me around.

Cosplay isnt helping. Video games aren't either. I havent felt any happiness since last year. I could deal with this if he was still alive. But at the same time Im lying to myself, I havent known what made me happy other than my past cat Ice Cube. I stayed for him since I love him. I had him since he was five weeks old. We bonded. Its not the case with Albert and I feel he loves me but we dont have the connection and never will.

Im never going to feel anything other than severe misery and depression. At least, that's what I 100% believe.

TLDR: Im severely struggling and dont know what to do anymore. I dont trust my new therapist even though she has stated more than once and my friend who also goes to her has stated more than once she wont send me to inpatient or CPAP and she tries to avoid hospitalization if we can. But because of multiple decades of PTSD, abuse, and being denied the proper treatment, help, support from friends and family that I should of gotten Im at the point where Im giving myself until December 31st to find a reason to stay alive and if I dont then Im letting my queue run out.

[queerautism]

hey its davey yeah the davey anon that would sign off his posts with -davey i think im still alive

sorry for disappearing but a lot has happened and im honestly kinda lost so um recently i had a really really bad meltdown/psychotic break or something along those lines that i failed to hide and i let a lot slip on accident to the bodys parents which i was not supposed to do literally ever and i need some help

how exactly do i do damage control

theyre gonna send me to therapy and also to get evaluated at the hospital and im kind of scared of saying something to make it worse i really dont wanna get put in a mental hospital but now both of them know im at least delusional and i dont know what to do about it they werent supposed to know anything and i was doing really really good at hiding shit but it just boiled over and i wasnt thinking straight it was like the one rule my system had and i broke it so im kinda freaking out

bodily im 17 but im actually like 12 so im really really fucking bad at this i dont know what im doing im kinda still freaking the fuck out from my meltdown i dont think i ever actually properly came down from it so im still really on edge

sorry for going to you guys but i dont really know who else to turn to im sorry

- davey

Hey, it's okay. It's gonna be okay. Please take a deep breath, you're gonna get through this. When you're still freaking out it's very easy to get stuck in the worst possible scenario, but it's most likely not going to be that bad.

Personally, as damage control, I would try to blame as much of it as I could on anxiety and stress. Be nice and polite to the therapist and whoever evaluates you at the hospital. I wouldn't tell them anything you don't want getting back to your parents, tbh.

I'd love to be able to encourage you to be open and honest for the best shot at getting help but we all know with our current psychiatric system that's a huge risk, sadly