#don't worry we're cool now
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fckinloserbby · 6 months ago
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"omg by the way if you think about it you and me r basically stolitz" -me 7/26
literally not even 10 minutes later we got into a joke argument except my autistic ass did not get that it was a joke and I got very mad so because of our stolas and blitzø "unable to communicate" asses, I ghosted them for a solid four hours (they were also mad at me though) and then came back and apologised 🤪
so like I guess we're stolitz^2 LOL
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jessicas-pi · 7 months ago
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hear me out on this ok. ROTS AU where Anakin still turns to the dark side but that's Palpatine's problem.
So, Palpatine decides last minute that ehhhh maybe dooku could come in handy later and he doesn't encourage Anakin to kill him, and Dooku gets arrested and imprisoned in the Jedi Temple awaiting trial. (Also he didn't get his hands cut off because of uhh plot reasons?)
Fast forward.
Palpatine is encouraging Anakin towards the Dark side, tells him about Plagueis the Wise, etc. etc. But see, the thing is, Anakin is at the end of his tether, probably hasn't slept more than three hours over the past week, and has no remaining impulse control or inhibitions, and upon hearing that the Dark Side can save people from death, his first thought is, "wait a sec, we've got a Sith Lord in-house at the moment!" and he sprints out of the space opera and books it back to the temple.
Now, Dooku has been calmly waiting in Temple custody, confident that Darth Sidious will arrange his escape. But THEN Anakin barges into the cell like OMG THE CHANCELLOR TOLD ME THE SITH KNOW HOW TO KEEP PEOPLE FROM DYING AND I'M HAVING DREAMS ABOUT SOMEONE DYING AND I NEED YOUR HELP TO SAVE THEM
At which point, Dooku realizes Palpatine's plan. He's going to tempt Skywalker to the Dark side and REPLACE DOOKU. this is totally uncool.
So he's like "...who are you dreaming about, exactly?"
Anakin freezes. He can't admit it's Padme because their relationship is top-secret and he can't admit how important she is to him so he tries to think of a good fib and goes "uhhhh OBI-WAN! Obi-Wan, it's Obi-Wan, I'm dreaming about Obi-Wan dying-" and he just throws himself into the drama because now he IS imagining obi-wan dying because Obi-Wan is fighting grievous at the moment and he MIGHT ACTUALLY DIE and that's in addition to Padme dying and he's totally spiraling at this point- "pleasepleaseplease you gotta help me he's like the only father i've ever known I don't know what i'll do without obi-wan I have to save him YOU GOTTA TELL ME WHAT TO DO I'LL DO ANYTHING--"
Dooku begins to smile.
(Would stealing Skywalker out from under his Master's nose be petty? Oh, yeah.)
(But it would also be very, very satisfying.)
---
Obi-Wan calls in to a council meeting to report his defeat of Grievous, but before he can say so, Mace announces that Dooku has escaped and the Sith Master has been killed.
Silence falls between the eleven councilmembers (eleven, not twelve, because their newest one is conspicuously absent. Obi-Wan wonders just what Anakin's up to now. Honestly, that boy will be the death of him.)
Obi-Wan clears his throat.
"...indeed," he says, trying to handle the shocking news with composure. "Well... at least we're down to one Sith, now."
Another awkward pause.
"Yeah, about that--" Mace begins.
#Dooku totes anakin back to the Separatists but Anakin's loyalty has really only ever been to like 3 people so he kinda doesn't care#as long as he doesn't have to fight obi-wan or ahsoka he's cool with it#his favorite part of the job is when he has to 'kidnap' padme and/or their kids for uhhhh Political Reasons#and they get to hang out as a family#obi-wan is always the one sent to 'rescue' padme#the rescues mostly consist of obi-wan rolling his eyes while Anakin and Padme draw out a goodbye longer than a midwesterner#(secretly obi-wan thinks it's kinda funny)#also as Anakin is now a Sith he learns about all the Sithly Plans including the clone chips and he immediately panics#'THIS COULD HURT OBI-WAN OR AHSOKA WE HAVE TO STOP IT'#and offers free healthcare (aka chip removal) to all clones on separatist planets (including active warzones) and somehow it works?#despite being the most drama-queen Jedi out there Anakin somehow becomes the most chill sith ever#like he will absolutely fly off the handle if anyone threatens Obi-Wan or Padme or Ahsoka but he's not into the causing-suffering thing#(which I know isn't how the dark side works really but for the purpose of funnyness yes it is)#he's pretty calm in general though! still wants to help people!#dooku sends him to conquer a republic planet that's fighting the separatists and he gets there and he's like#WELL OF COURSE THEY'RE FIGHTING US! LOOK AT ALL THE PROBLEMS WE'RE CAUSING FOR THEM! THEIR ECONOMY IS IN SHAMBLES!#*to the planetary leaders* don't worry I know someone in the Senate who can help with relief aid. in the meantime let's talk treaties!#when he gets back dooku is like YOU ARE A *SITH* YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO CAUSE *SUFFERING*#and Anakin is like I TIED ALL THEIR SHOELACES TOGETHER WITH THE FORCE WHILE WE WERE IN DIPLOMATIC MEETINGS WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!?#jessica's random thoughts#star wars au
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pocketramblr · 8 months ago
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Watched new hope yesterday and have a vague idea floating around in my head... But first I wanna see something
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marc--chilton · 6 months ago
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(mgv) wilson lashing out at house for making fun of him for wanting pups and spitting that this, too, can be blamed partly on house, just like how julie said house may not have broken up their marriage but certainly didn't help, either. and house looks away from him, gaze flickering as he processes. his neediness has once again kept wilson from happiness. and if anyone deserves to be happy, it's him.
"pup me, then."
"scuzi?"
and house just shrugs, struggling to meet wilson's eyes. "you have no wife, no girlfriend, and in spite of the fact that you could adopt, you've not done so, ergo you want one with your DNA. i could give you that if you wanted."
"could you?"
"last i checked, i did have those parts, but it doesn't hurt to double check--"
"you know what i mean."
and house drops his gaze again, bounces his cane on the floor. "if that would make you happy.... i would."
the beat of silence is heavy. house can't decipher the look wilson's giving him.
"let me..... let me think about it."
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b4kuch1n · 1 year ago
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haha! bit ill
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junk-culture · 1 year ago
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Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
👍
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silent-sentinels · 6 months ago
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...okay gang we're. we're out of The Situation now. the cousins are no longer judging every social faux pas we make! we can stop feeling like a nuisance to everyone who knows us like!! anytime now!!
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fluffypurpleglitterdemon · 2 years ago
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If they keep the “reds aren’t allowed to be friends with yellows/greens” rule on Limited Life I am going to start biting
#Me Talking#StopLife series#limited life smp#Greens and yellows have already been allowed to be friends and green/yellow this time around isn't functionally different from yellow/red#I had trust issues in the beginning of limited life; I couldn't let myself get attached to any group#because I remembered last life where almost none of the first-session factions survived together#and this time it's been different! Inter-faction boogeys haven't been happening and everyone's been being a team#and now I'm invested in the Clockers and the TIES and the Bad Boys and all the factions as FACTIONS#(which side note I think was a big part about why we all went insane about third life)#(and why I didn't enjoy Last Life as much and then enjoyed Double Life with its built-in factions more)#(and was initially worried about limited life because of the bogey mechanic coming back even though the bogey mechanic is cool and fun)#And factions can fall apart in the endgame. Betrayals can happen. That's fun and cool (and both of those happened in third life)#but breaking up a faction because one of the members went red just kinda feels bad#I get why they did it in last life. I get that in third life reds being able to be part of factions changed how being red worked/felt#and everyone on a faction with a red being able to kill made reds vulnerable rather than dangerous#but on limited life reds aren't as vulnerable. They have like 7 more deaths left. And reds also aren't the only ones allowed to do violence#so come on. Let the TIES keep their team. Don't break up the Clocker family. Let the finale keep the factions we're invested in
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vamptastic · 2 years ago
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i think my constant seething rage is honestly very reasonable. i literally live in florida.
#got in argument with a guy the other day abt idk. trans athletes#was basically him trying to explain what the issue is to me (i know. that's kinda step one to having an opinion on it.)#and then going yeah huh i guess you're actually right (i was)#and i was like okay great cool we're done here let me go to class and he starts talking about like#how he still loves trump for this and that reason kinda unprompted (sorry you lost an argument dude go introspect somewhere else im LATE)#and i was like yeah idk abt that. on account of all the corruption. and the foreign policy youre saying is like manly macho man strong is#mostly just wildly stupid posturing that's going to achieve nothing at best and world war at worst#and he goes no don't worry i think DESANTIS would be better for 2024 actually#and i. UNDERSTANDBLY. was like oh okay i cannot speak to you (because i am visibly shaking with rage)#and he goes well i think you are misattributing my intentions (cunt.)#and i said no no i don't think you're malicious i just think you're stupid and wildly misinformed#and then left bc i was about to either hit him or start crying (bc that guy has been like very tangibly ruining my life for months#and i genuinely cannot fathom what fucking tax issue or whatever one would value over like. my right to idk. Exist atp.#and also this coming from someone who just tried to be like no i know so many trans people i love trans ppl im not like those conservatives#like try to dig deep down into whatever rotted husk of a brain is left in your skull and fathom why i might have a strong reaction to your#support for DESANTIS and the SPACE LASERS WOMAN#you fucking idiot.)#and was that civil. No. and now i have to apologize to him bc i feel bad about it even though i fully meant it#idk its what i get for trying to change peoples minds with stupid things like#' statistics ' and ' a utilitarian perspective ' and ' existing legal basis for my argument '#guys so wrapped up in their right wing bubble they just dont wanna hear it#n they always assume i mustve not heard their talking points and its like look at where we fucking live#and look at the state of the world. NOBODY in any form of mainstream news shares my politics lmao#you think i havent heard every conceivable argument abt trans people??? also you think im dumb enough to form an opinion without looking at#the other side? yeah man i know about the three trans women who have ever won a sports competition ever. do you?#do you even know their fucking names or sports or trial outcomes.#GOD just fucking. pseudo intellectual facist horseshit like pragru and infowars masquerading as legítimate sources#are making so many dumbass illiterate (i truly don't think they have the reading comprehension to decifer a study or even long article)#guys think they're gods gift to politics bc they listened to someone else tell them what a source says through ten layers of propaganda#just. uh. everyone should die forever and also learn to read.
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unproduciblesmackdown · 1 year ago
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also given that the logic of said superiority authoriority is an entitlement to deny someone's personhood & use them as an object for your purposes, from obviously getting to direct what they must do & can't do, to enjoying whatever gratification from lashing out / demeaning which is also going to serve as an affirming exercise in authority when one can do that from an insulated elevated place....a crucial part of whatever form of this violence, from the most nanoscopic triangle in the sierpiński triangle pyramid scheme hierarchy, to the hypothetical largest (zoom in or out to whatever degree: the same shit also), being that indeed the superior parties need the deserved insulation from any Consequence to exerting their superior status, including indeed from having to witness the consequences For the "inferior" parties, such as whatever externalizations of suffering they recognize as such, which either (a) need to be put away (b) are manipulative performances or otherwise exaggerated (e.g. being a pussy / not even having the sense to realize how little suffering they're Really experiencing) or (c) can be fun to witness if you decide you enjoy that as an affirmation of power as per your ability to completely detach from any avoidance of causing pain, harming for its own sake, b/c you Can
all which is to frame how Interesting it is that after all those moments of going "well, they keep bothering with reaction shots of winston noticeably feeling hurt & expressing it, sometimes also verbally. it's like it could be setting up something" it set up Nothing; while once again just like has been done dozens of times a scene just Ends on winston being rejected &/or hurt, no resolution then, no resolution ever, and in the case of 7x03 was so significant an attack that just like in 4x11 when mafee gets to take out his own Loyalty Insecurity on winston while everyone else hangs around in tacit to overt approval, everyone just leaves the room & we get winston staying behind in the Most distant position aaand scene's over! thread's over! david levien get back here after you Liked that 4x12 livetweet of mine pointing out "so see & winston was right anyways??" like....that is: we are given the Perspective of someone who is also now Leaving winston behind, thus immune to the consequences of however that treatment could actually affect him or how he might struggle to deal with that now (who cares! the answer is: Alone) like Whatever, next time we see him he's completely fine now. and i'm just so happening to think that all the little moments of getting to see winston wither & withdraw & etc in reaction to being shitted on was also us being granted the perspective of Gratification that he's punished for speaking or existing or whatever, without it ever going anywhere or mattering beyond that instant. we too are the ones who surely get to relentlessly bully the autistic person & damn if we don't at least enjoy someone getting to go off the rails restoring their ego by doing absolutely whatever they want to him, which just so happens to be perfectly aligned with getting him Back In Line. pull yourself together winston! the only consequences you're experiencing we wanna deal with are the ones where you give us the algorithm we decided we want, actually. and now let's look across the rest of the season where the consequences for wags for being this way (or anyone else for standing by, ready to benefit, with philip bafflingly declaring as well how actually it was brutal in a good way) is approximately fuckall even as of course nobody's pretending he's one of the personal growth guys out here: rian is though, and didn't have to "grow" out of abusing winston or thinking that was fine & good or that of course she's inherently superior! and in the end we have more affection and interest for the Epic Asshole than their Cringe Targets
#yeah once again really appreciate being given the Rewards of that Fantasy of pwning these losers#we get to Glimpse winston going :/ :( b/c that's how we know he was aptly punished for trying to act like he's a fellow person#when we're grabbing his head forcing him back into place in a bigger way it's more important we then dust our hands off & Leave#winston leaving May be that eventual acknowledgment of consequence for w/e scraps of sympathy (pity) billions has for him#but it's made into an episode abt wags w/marked Little care for winston's role & once again Just A Fun Power Trip! for us viewers too!#thoughts amped up from the harmonic resonance of a more zoomed out triangle in the self similar fractal of pyramid scheme hierarchy....#the inferior may be beset w/mass death & violence but um my nice dinner out please?? same No Consequences For The Superior logics#prince shits on winston ep 1? cool! we're giving him a chance. shits on rian ep 12? whoa! whadda hell blunosaur....hang on a minute....#winston billions#how gracious to align us as viewers with the people comfortably shitting on those Beneath Them for kicks & status#and ''pitying'' the Inferior parties doesn't disrupt your superiority so don't worry about that#rian talking to winston like a dog & pitching right in for hurting him via ''he wasn't ever worth listening to But here ya go'' as Pity....#taylor moved away from their being willing to hire him; listen to him; even At All step in even a Tiny bit to insulate him....#towards wanting to forever ignore him & express contempt & tell rian the pitying is Too Much & be right there w/wags in 7x03...?#guess that was just like ''well they can't possibly have an arc of keeping up Any supportiveness / basic recognition of this loser''#but they also don't have to interact w/their own willingness to Insistence on being awful to him either#wasn't even the consequence of [once again we need his epic output...but have treated him like shit?] nah just took it from him :)#anyways; riled. riling times#sure having plenty of firsthand experience with a Refusal to accept like responsibility of produced suffering#there's plenty of room for distress; particularly if translated into irritation/anger; as dismissable to ''haha funny. now anyways''#then there's the option of Resenting whatever evident pain. you can't Tyrannically impose that consequence on Me!!! why i oughta#see also the tyranny of winston Speaking (demanding listening) Being Present (demanding navigation of that) having wants; feelings (NO)....#or you're at more of a loss? you ofc simply get to literally/figuratively walk away :) turning away from winston. ending the scene. shrug#anyways winston is inherently an Other who just so happens to deserve to be Our punching bag & inferior in life yippee wahoo#and by ''just so happens'' we mean clearly Deserves it based on nothing abt what Consequences his actions do or don't have lol lmao#his deserving this inferiority is something more Inherent about him okay lol lmao XD a sentiment unchallenged all 5 seasons he's here#how fun every time rian starts talking to winston with insults & punishment Prompted by his audacity in existing loserishly#what a rollicking episode as wags decides he'll prove his superiority over someone today & everyone claps as he assaults winston. nice!#it was so essential b/c now we can Take his coding w/o having to interact w/him (save 1 meeting just w/sacker!) cool!!! good!!!#lord even knows Where Do I Start Where Do I End It well anywhere & nowhere always & never. the lil topic of ableism & abuse
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breadmercury · 2 years ago
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Y'all.... it's ok to write "bad" fic. U don't need to be super technically advanced at writing to write something super self indulgent for urself. None of my writing will ever see the light of day bc it's all self insert emotional support fic for only me to see. U don't need to rely on an ai that scrapes and steals from other people's works to simulate comforting conversations with ur blorbos. And script fics are a thing too!! U don't need to write it all out in prose, u can stick to something closer to rp format!!! So even if u don't want to rp with real people u still have alternatives to using c.ai.
Nature will only heal when y'all stop using Character AI chats and just go rp with your friends
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mytumblogforgames · 11 days ago
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Missing expectations by 50% lol. It's almost like making a fourth game in a franchise (and only direct sequel) without leveraging and relying on the franchise material that came before it leaves an audience feeling extraordinarily....meh. Why would I recommend this to someone who knows the world, and the older games, and wants that same experience of building a setting? On the other hand though, why would I recommend to someone new that they get involved in a franchise that has just decided to abandon all the previous material? Aside from the extreme disappointment they'd feel getting back to 4 after playing the others (if they even get the itch from the game itself, which could be a long shot considering it gives you no incentive for curiosity and would be relying on the strength of the setting itself, which is admittedly huge!!! and why the result we got here is so damn disappointing...), we all now know that Nothing Matters. What incentive is there to continue? What will they get next? Another excruciatingly limiting title that parades itself around as a "role playing" game while actually offering only a painfully narrow character with virtually no branching choices, and has little to no reactivity?
If I wanna watch a movie while I play my videogames, I'll play a quantic dreams title, thanks. Rug pulling an RPG is crazy lol. We can TELL when it's a lie, we're literally playing the game. Love to see a "she would not fucking say that" and it's my own player character lmao. And the rated M game is fun little jaunt where we all say "thank you for saying that," never have real interparty conflict (or really, any high stakes at all), can't express ourselves in any way other than Valid and Supportive, spend a not insignificant amount of dialogue ensuring we all know our pirates are good ethical hero folks, don't ever even get to sympathize with the villain because this is a rated M game and it very serious and not at all a Disney movie, and oh, you'll never guess this, but the rated M game is completely sexless -- we just blink at each other in three different convos before we go 😟😳🥹 I love you!!! My hero!! Like it isn't about the sex itself, it's about the willingness to be, idk, gross or uncomfortable etc (and in this case pacing lol). This game feels like it's hiding things preemptively so as to avoid causing "offense" like it's...pearl clutchy to me, in a way, or at least, trying to ensure that pearl clutcher is the most comfortable they can possibly be. And like I'm sorry but idc about them, this isn't about them, this is dragon age lol. Rated M for Misinformation smdh...
#it's crazy bc like. bw has pretty much always gotten praise for the world building of the games#even something like me3 the issue there was how they took that sandbox and pigeonholed it which made it feel pointless and bad#which uhhhh. huh. totally not relevant at all .....#(not to mention the lack of a Third Option and shep was either Good or Mean...again. Relevant lol but it's even worse this time)#but the character work has always been praised! issues like the trans woman in mark of the assassin dlc (im so sorry idr her name 😭)#werent about the character work.... it was fundamentally Bad politics. so why enshrine it in your game#understandably here they tried to avoid such a minefield. but to overcorrect into completely spineless characterisation is...bad#and it also required the sanitization of the world itself which strips it of complication and color and means we as the player and audience#have extremely little to engage with. all that there is is The Fight. we are Beating The Bad Guy. and nothing else is happening. and nothin#about it is complex. it is cut and dry. so there's nothing to engage with. and no one has any particularly strong feelings on anything#and the result of a world filled with boring people where nothing strange complicated or interesting is happening..... is a boring setting#which is. fucking. crazy. it's BONKERS. this is THEDAS?????? there is SO!!!!! MUCH!!! THERE!!!#but you wouldnt know it by walking through the world of da4 or speaking to the companions. bc nothing else is happening#and they dont have feelings on anything. at all. it's just We're The Good Guys Teaming Up Against Pure Evil the game#and that's just fundamentally Not what a dragon age game has ever been. and never should have ever become.#(and again. to reiterate. there is essentially zero roleplaying in the roleplaying game. you are GIVEN a role to play.#which we called RPGs back in the 90s sometimes sure when things were limited so it was cool to choose between six possible PCs...#now? thats a fuckin joke. dont lie to my face n tell me I'm playing a role when I can't even decide if my PC was a former slave or not lol)#(also slavery is a thing we will never show. ever. but don't worry we'll let you know it's in the world but our heroes would NEVER support#it!!! it's totally happening and is evil but no you can't see it and no it's existence has no effect on your PC whatsoever!!!#most definitely not if you're playing an ELF and are THE peoples who have a well documented millennia+ of servitude in the place we#spend most of the game..... yeah you can just walk around no problem. bc it Totally Exists except....we won't show you. so why should you#even believe me when i say it exists.... 🤔🤔🤔)#my setting is full of lies and fake facts that i may or may not ever acknowledge! would you like to immerse yourself in it?!????! 😐
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slimyenemy · 14 days ago
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it's also stupid because like i just straight up don't know how to talk about it i don't know what you want me to want! tend to think you just want me to "get over" the horrors your cultist friends keep inflicting on me which is not happening y'all are just evil af and because it's you when i personally want to know things about you want ten million other things want to be friends with you want to just straight up marry you forever and wouldn't hesitate even for a second all of these things badly and i have no idea which one is appropriate but doing all that for any cultist is like insane regardless of which one it is but they're all important ✨to me✨ at least but if you really just want to be evil so bad because it feels more normal to you for some reason there's barely even any point in talking about it but it's about you as hell it's also about the cult being fucked up and hurting freaking everyone and ruining everything and me just having to look at it for years now and for some reason it's always like as if i say something it just cancels out everything else i said but it literally doesn't it's really just EVERYTHING
#so you're either being any of these really cool things with me and stop downplaying his behavior#or he's getting cursed#and it won't be just because i'm trying to get you to stop enabling the cult and hurting me it's also because i'm hurt by the cult#i just can't really imagine myself having enough space for all that trauma bullshit in my head if i'm with you#but also it would only work like that with you because you're from the cult yourself and you're amazing and epic#and that last part is important i would just be angry otherwise though still caring because i'm stupid or something#depending on how you would be acting about it exactly i guess but not the point#he's also absolutely getting cursed if he tries anything weird on you or anyone else like 10000000% cursed#need to practice my curses anyway for other things too and everything#like damn the only reason for me *not* to worry about you is just some weird hierarchy bullshit#where hurting some people like that is just always okay regardless#when i literally just didn't do anything except had emotions about things that happened to me#talking about robotic :\#and you didn't do anything except having emotions about me and me having emotions so it's really just such bullshit#like sure there could be other things you can be a bit hard to read sometimes and impulsive and stuff but he also hates all these things >>#about me so much to the point of just wanting them erased completely along with my entire self of course it was that too#and it's fundamentally messed up it's literally torture we're talking about after all#miss you basically idk❤️#dammit i'm not talking like that to people to whom me talking just means they're still in control and can keep me trapped and tortured#i'm talking like that to them because they're worth it to me even if they become 100% a cultist#and i don't want to hurt them just because i'm extremely hurt#nvm just saw something these god damn freaking cultists god🙄#skip up a little now⬆️
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sepiasys · 16 days ago
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Hey.
Had a fun lil crash, but… better, ig.
I should've tried to talk internally instead of expecting others (irl/externally) to be able to help when I don't even know what kind of help I need :<
…🦊 came by and helped me out... Specifically, he went out of his way to type stuff out (Ellipsus) so we could talk. Long-haired look instead of the typical way they're drawn, if u wanna know, but that's just a little extra detail.
I apologized to her again about… everything, ig :< I was stupid, I forgot that we're supposed to work together and that I should be able to ask the others for help 😞 He forgave me, and in their own way shared that she understands that I go through a lot. A hell of a lot.
So… I guess things are kinda ok now. He even tried a joke, in his own way (which usually when they joke or anything, it kinda comes off sarcastic or rude in some way. But I know they meant to be lighthearted about it.)
It makes me… kinda sad, ig, that I'm the main one who does all this talking. Or ig is the one who needs it this much. I still regret not talking to anyone internally of my own volition at first.
Glad 🦊 was here, ig… Not that I hate em. I actually think we haven't... really had much of a relationship? We're usually close, in a sense, but I think that's more of a... trauma, trigger thingy, for why we might front close together. I don't know if anyone remembers how our relationship would've been before, I just feel like she might've hated me at some point? But I don't have any memory of past interactions, nor of their side of it. I don't know if they remember, either.
I'm glad they were there for me, atleast.
#sepiasys.txt#sepiasys.priv#I still need a name; because the one we use for me? It always feels like a placeholder. If I'm not the one writing or if it's third person;#I never have a name? I don't know if I would like the placeholder. I don't know if I wanted this other name at some point or if that was#someone else. 🦊 actually joked about how I need a name! Like; an actual joke ^^ Well… more *teasing* than anything; but still#Some other notes I know were floating or discarded thoughts -> we tend to do one-on-one conversations; taking turns. It's the most effective#I don't know if we could handle a free-for-all type of conversation; or ig trying to identify ourselves and get a thought out fully that way#That's kinda what the notepad is for; though. Because we don't need to identify but we can sorta feel who it is or if it changes?#But yeah; one-on-one is the most effective even though we wish we could have talks with more than two. But it's fine for now…#I… remember someone wanted to use Ellipsus to talk to 👑; I don't think they did though? …idk. There was a small dark blobby mass thingy that#🦊 grabbed out of the air; it was inserting correction thoughts sorta? Reminders? He threw it out into the distance#Dont worry; it was a weird floaty blob; keyword floaty. It's probably fine; whatever it is.#They hugged me btw. Which I know felt awkward for them; even internally. That was somewhat intentionally reflecting how they've hugged B irl#I appreciate it; though. She… definitely deserves that protector role. Though they definitely can come off as a persecutor; so ig they fit#the whole 'misguided protector' thing. We're all just trying our best 😓#I know we're supposed to eventually be able to trust people irl. but it's hard… and they hurt us. Atleast if we hurt ourselves; it's easier#for us to fix things. I'm trying really hard not to act/sound avoidant towards real people ^^;;;#We just… need to get used to relying solely on ourselves again; to an extent 😅 Need to be able to talk to ourselves and omg no 🌼 please why#I'm uh. mostly sure that 🌼 is here now. (I think it's partially because I thought about how they're the one who handles irl people usually)#AGH ok I'm just ending it here because this- no. I. It's making it rlly hard to focus @_@ SHIT WHAT WAS I WRITING#OKAY I'M GONNA END THIS HERE o_o;;; ^^;; Yeah I can't remember what all was being written *Oops!* ^^;#Uhhh congrats 🦊 and 🪶? <:3 Yeah because that's pretty cool :3 I have a general idea of what happened; yippee!! ^^ Proud of y'all‼️
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girlivealwaysbean · 4 months ago
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my dad woke me up at 6.45 to give me green tea what the fuck😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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mako-island-moon-pool · 10 months ago
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Why am I flipping tf out over my roommate going into my room when I wasn't home and leaving a package on my bed it's literally not a big deal and they were trying to be helpful but I am shaking right now I should be happy I got my new favorite shirt but I'm so angry
#Like genuinely seething with rage over something so innocuous I shouldn't be angry#But at the same time I'm like...#The door was shut. When did I ever say you could come in here (I didn't). I wasn't home. Don't touch my stuff. You could have left it#Outside the door. My room is a mess and they saw. AND DON'T TOUCH MY STUFF#I feel like I shouldn't have to sit them down and be like 'hey I don't want you going in my room when I didn't say you could go in there'#Like I feel like that's common sense when u live with other people but I guess not?????#Like it really bothers me cuz I'd NEVER go into someone's room when they weren't there w/o express permission#Fucks sake I linger outside the doorway til they say I can come in when they are there and we're talking#I feel like that's just basic decency because it's their space#Why can't you respect mine and not go in my room when you don't have permission?????#At least text me first????!#THE DOOR WAS SHUT THATS WHAT'S REALLY BOTHERING ME#THE DOOR WAS SHUT WHY WOULD YOU LOOK AT A CLOSED DOOR TO SOMEONE'S BEDROOM AND JUST WALK IN WITHOUT EVER ASKING#Sorry. I know I'm being super irrational right now#I just. My mom used to go through my stuff when I lived at home and throw out whatever she wanted#She would wait until I left the house and then throw things out and leave the rest in a giant pile of trash on the floor#It was always when I was having a decent day too. She'd treat me totally normally the whole way home and then I'd walk into my room to it#Absolutely destroyed and her response was always a cool 'well you should have cleaned it then'#I used to have to dig through the garbage to get the stuff I had attachments to back#She once threw out an entire shoebox filled with my drawings because it was 'too messy' but literally the lid was slightly askew from being#Overfilled. Instead of getting me a bigger container or another shoebox she just fucking tossed it#I lost so much childhood art from that it's part of the reason I refuse to throw anything I've ever drawn away#Anyway this is why I'm overreacting and being irrational and not letting people walk all over me with no complaints#Don't worry though I'm working on squishing any other reservations I have about being a doormat#That way in a couple more years I'll just be a shell of a person and then people will finally like having me around#AJDGDHDHDBMSBDGDJDHDBDMDBDBDN#Grumble grumble
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