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i-write-hurt-not-comfort · 2 years

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diabolik lovers weed 🍃 headcanons because i wanted to

and i’m stoned right now

discussions of recreational drug use and implied nsfw under the cut! this one isn’t angsty. we just have to pretend this isn’t in japan where drugs are taboo.

for reference: a joint is rolled with just weed, a spliff is rolled with a mix of tobacco and weed, a blunt is weed packed with a cigar, a bong... well, this and edibles are baked goods (cakes, cookies etc) which were baked with weed.

Shu

you cannot convince me this man isn’t stoned 24/7

he’s getting stoned at every minor inconvenience

enjoys smoking weed in the bath, on stairs, and especially in the living room to piss off reiji

wake n bake before school

loves napping while stoned

i think he’d prefer a bong because he’s definitely too lazy to roll a joint, but he does know how

Reiji

never tells anyone but he smoked weed out of curiosity once and kind of liked it

likes to conduct his own experiments on himself with different strains out of interest

smokes to cool down when thinks get stressful

isn’t keen on the smell so he doesn’t smoke weed a huge amount

cannot figure out how to use a bong but he rolls perfect joints

Ayato

he wants to smoke weed as one of the cool kids

he coughs the first few times he does it but forces himself to get used to it

likes to smoke at night when he can’t sleep

smokes weed socially and enjoys getting stoned after basketball club

definitely smokes with laito when either of them are feeling rough or lonely

he can’t roll joints, but he definitely thinks he can

likes CBD vapes too

Laito

thinks he looks really sexy when he smokes (he does)

has to roll joints for ayato

enjoys smoking with ayato too but also likes to get high when he’s feeling shitty or after nightmares and stuff

definitely skips school to smoke with girls and get a bit handsy

he makes edibles for ayato and kanato

Kanato

the only way he’ll smoke weed is with flavoured rolling papers and even then he’s not good with it

he does enjoy edibles but only occasionally

doesn’t really like the feeling of being high

will smoke weed with ayato and laito if invited because he doesn’t want to be left out

he also like CBD vapes because they’re sweet flavoured

ya’ll don’t wanna see the munchies he gets

Subaru

smoking weed really helps his anger

has gotten used to smoking after outbursts nowadays and often smokes in the coffin to get away from everyone

also gets stoned in the rose garden if he’s feeling down

has been dragged out by kou to smoke on the school roof and reluctantly agrees (not really reluctantly)

usually rolls a spliff to combine tobacco and weed to save money and prefers the high/taste from this

Ruki

this man is squinting all the time because he’s constantly high

no because i don’t think he’d be addicted but ruki would definitely smoke to chill out a lot

he finds himself more bearable when high

thinks reading while high is fun (weird)

often goes on political rants to himself if he’s really stoned

enjoys a joint and a drink on a sunday evening to mentally prep for the week

occasionally will smoke with his brothers but prefers getting high alone

Kou

he’s famous so he does a lot of drugs in general and i will not elaborate on this again

really enjoys having sex while high

definitely smokes weed to come down/at afters or to cope with hangovers

prefers using a bong but can roll joints to a reasonable standard

always inviting yuma and azusa to get high with him

he also likes getting zooted with subaru after school or when subaru seems bad at school

i think he uses CBD vapes as well and smokes to sleep or get around from nightmares/flashbacks

gets the munchies like crazy

Yuma

this man grows the best home-grown weed on the market

seriously i think he’d be attached to his weed plants and happily supplies his brothers with good weed

i know this is recycled from my fic but him and shu definitely get high together and talk about anything

they are the two stoners of the series and they like each other’s company especially when balls high

yuma also enjoys smoking with his brothers and finds it helps his anger sometimes

likes blunts mainly but also uses a bong if he’s lazy

Azusa

smokes the least of his brothers and coughs horribly every time but he enjoys the burn

agrees to smoke with his brothers bc he can spend time with them

prefers to smoke alone

either gets really really stoned or doesn’t bother

often just lies in bed and stares at the ceiling until he falls asleep

only ever uses a bong, he can’t roll and doesn’t like joints much

Carla

smokes to help with his pain from endzeit

can’t smoke a lot because it’s bad on his lungs

i don’t think he could figure out a bong or how to roll anything so i deadass think he’d use a pipe

Shin

isn’t too keen on the smell but he smokes weed occasionally

only really if he’s bored or feeling bad or super angry

he strikes me as a blunt guy idk why

also likes edibles and has made them for carla because

idk why but i feel like he’d get horny while high

Kino

medium level stoner

doesn’t smoke before gaming because it screws with his attention

likes to smoke weed every day after long gaming sessions to chill down

gets high and just plays animal crossing or something easy going

likes smoking with yuri when yuri actually agrees

always uses a bong and has a CBD vape he uses with it

gets the munchies like crazy

thank you for reading this bullshit

#diabolik lovers #my headcanons #// drugs #if u have thoughts or additions to these pls share

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montammil · 1 year

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I really feel like Lawrence would fucking hate my ocs.

Tdlr: I really just started thinking about things while reading your blog. (it's a great blog btw!) So, I told you about my musings.

Ellington- Cause he's 1. too old to be his kid (He's in that 25 rn.)

2. Cause he's already famous, his disappearance would be noticed.

3. He's a busy-body, always out doing something.

4. Ellington is kinda assertive

5. Ellington vapes. (Not often but still!)

He wouldn't be interested unless it somehow leaked, he was struck by lightning twice. {That's about to be a bitch to write!}

Rex-Cause while he's a work-a-holic, he still is too old(25). He's also previously had a wife who's deceased. So, like I think Lawrence would feel too connected emotionally.

Also, Rex is famous too. Just like Ellington they're in a deathcore band.

I can't really see how he'd get along with them unless Lawrence was maybe older. But even then, I feel like Lawrence would be that crotchety (grumpy) old man.

Idk, seeing the Luca & Lawrence story made me really start thinking.

Also, they both dress far more revealing than Marshal. I'm talking them wide ass arm holes, no sleeves and ripped jeans. Mainly darker colors.

Also, while Rex might be receptive to the babying in small small amounts, Ellington wouldn't even like the nicknames. {Imagining Larence calling him Elly in a soft voice makes me want to cry & die from laughter though cause while others typically call him that I imagine it wouldn't be reciprocated. y'know?}

Thinking Rex's quiet nature and him being busy-body in the way of being a work-a-holic would make Lawrence consider it.

Also, I think Lawrence might be touched that Rex while still missing his wife (Middle school besties -> high school sweethearts.) moved on from that life and chooses solitude or quiet nights in with his best friend. (He'd totally buy into their dating rumors until Rex got good and fed up. Then he'd be like oh, so they aren't dating but in denial.

(Canonically they're just very affectionate best friends.)

(1/2)

Sorry if this like makes no sense I am not good at concisely putting things. This is just me thinking too deeply. I just wanted to re state that this is just me thinking and not me writing anything..I think you know what I mean but I wanted to just put that disclaimer cause I haven't ever submitted this kinda thing before.

I think Lawrence would like your OC’s, he’d just view it as a challenge to break them down, and though he can get impatient, he would think it’d be all worth it in the end.

Personally I think Lawrence would take a heavier liking to Rex, but I could still view both of them as potential kidnapping material!

The fact of being 25 would also not be too much of a bother on Lawrence, since current Nathan is also 25 and it doesn’t bother him too much. It’s all about the “mental age” to him.

That’s why Nathan’s anger and stubbornness are seen as childish traits to Lawrence, which is what makes him feel parental, which I think he might see with Ellington (or even Rex).

I think I could see him wanting both of them, but that’s mainly if they form a connection with him and show vulnerability around him (whether they mean to or not).

Some other things I’d like to add is, Lawrence would hate the fact Ellington vapes, but Nathan smoked, so he’d try to look past the vaping. He has a savior complex, so he’d view it as “saving him from himself”.

Your OCs sound awesome, by the way!! From the way you described both of them, they sound so cool! Feel free if you ever want to share your works with me, privately or not :D

If you decide to write something with Lawrence in it with your OC’s, please don’t be afraid to!! Don’t even be afraid if it’s a little ooc, write him how you perceive him!

And if not, I still really enjoyed reading this!!

#answered ask #lawrence oc #thank you for sharing your musings with me!!#again your ocs sound awesome!!

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rpbtgirl · 1 year

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I have to wonder, it’s not even lunch yet and I am having all these deep thoughts, realizations, and feelings, what is going on here. There is definitely a shift happening. I am having a hard time doing any of the work I’m supposed to do and almost solely focused on how I am feeling and my new self imposed mission. I want, no, at this point, I need him to see me, to be exposed to him. I am trying to think of any excuse to go into his office, to talk to him, to find some way to get this ball rolling. Happy little coincidence, he comes to my desk to talk about some project and something going on that I’ll need to take care of. I’m being very attentive, listening carefully, he always leans on my desk when he explains something, propped up on both hands hovering a little in front and above me sitting. Now I have a couple of questions, I lean back a little in my office chair with my hands on my belly when I feel my dress move up a little as I lean, another happy little accident. I don’t expose anything but the hem of my dress is close, any further and I’m showing lip. There’s that spot in my mind that just wants to pull my dress up for full show and I am actually having to fight the urge, but there are others that might see and I’m not wanting that. We finish our discussion, he stands up, looks at me and gives me a big smile. He either isn’t noticing how high up my skirt is or he is just really good with peripheral vision and is keeping it cool because I’m not seeing much of a reaction. 😡

He’s back in his office, oops I forgot to ask him something so I have to toddle in there. Now I am the one leaning on his desk, sort of beside him. The way I’m leaning my dress has pulled up in the back and if someone could see in the windows they would see my ass peeking out from under, well that thought gave me even more of a charge. I reach to pint at something on the screen and two things happen, my dress pulls up a little more and I find that the corner of his desk is at just the right height in this position that it makes contact with my very achey and very needy pussy. I lowered myself just a little to get a bit more pressure, my GOD, my eyes almost rolled back in my head and almost came right there. I felt so depraved, I really don’t know what else to call it, that my urges and pussy were in charge and I’m humping the corner of this guys desk right next to him. All done discussion, I have to go back to my desk but I just want to keep going, to have him call me out on it but he doesn’t, he’s either oblivious or a very cool guy. Straighten up to head back to my desk, my mind is a mess, I can’t think straight other than the NSFW thought racing through there. Im getting nothing done, I can’t concentrate, can’t focus, he’ll at this point if it wasn’t for autocorrect I wouldn’t even be able to send an email. He come out of his office, walks to the end of the hall to the stairs for the side entrance, smoke break, asks if I am coming……I was so focused on all my dirty little thoughts it felt like he asked if I was cumming 🤣. I was all flustered What?!? No?!? I could feel my cheeks flush with embarrassment, was I touching myself and not even realizing it?!? No no, he’s asking you if you want to join him…no I’m not a smoker but I do vape. he heads through the door and starts down ahead of me, he’s hit the landing and starting down the second set of stairs that doubles back when I pop through the door at the upper landing, he looks up, is that a little twinkle I see in his eyes? There’s a grin and he looks away, could he see up my dress from that angle? He must have been able to!!! Another rush come over me, I’m all giggles, I’m bouncing down the stairs. He’s already outside when I get to the bottoms and like a little kid playing with her dress I hop off the last stair and flick my dress up exposing myself to the stairwell, nobody sees but it’s fun and feels good. Gather myself and step outside.

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deliciouskeys · 2 years

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001 for Maevelander :)

* when I started shipping it if I did:

Episode 3 of season 1! They had so many good interactions. I was really intrigued by what kind of person Maeve was to be able to not only date HL, and also somehow manage to extricate herself out of a relationship with him, still be alive, and still have him clearly pining to get back together.

“See that’s what I like about you. You always tell me the truth”. And then in episode 4… the harrowing plane scene. The Boys writers say it sets up a contrast between HL and Maeve’s moralities, of course, but I thought it was also a fascinating example of someone staying silent about a serious crime because it’s their ex-partner who did it. Her evolving and increasing disgust and self-judgement as events spiral out afterwards was very interesting to watch.

* my thoughts:

I do think with each season their interactions got less satisfying 😕 But I adored morallygray!Maeve walking with the devil side by side in season 1 ❤️❤️❤️

* What makes me happy about them:

I thought Maeve was a badass female character, and I really like to think/read about how she first discovered and tapped into HL’s mental subbiness.

* What makes me sad about them:

Well, the fact that they were never really on the same page at all about the relationship is pretty sad. The scene in S3 where she tells HL that she hated him from the start makes her yet another person gaslighting him (don’t think the writers intended this scene to be tragic but it was)

* things done in fanfic that annoys me:

I have to say none of the Maevlander fics I’ve come across have annoyed me. Hypothetically, I’d be annoyed by a fic where HL was cruel and abusive to Maeve and she was meek and long-suffering.

* things I look for in fanfic:

Maeve being dominant in bed, but also Maeve being afraid of HL. The fics that pull off both of those aspects really rev me up. Also, it’s not a requirement but I’ve been delighted by the percentage of fics for this pairing that involve a pegging element— not a necessity by any means, but makes me feral.

* Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other:

Maeve can be with Elena if that makes her happy (maybe this is my own problem but I wish Elena were written as a more interesting character. I didn’t quite feel the chemistry.) I loved Maeve with Butcher, even though it came out of left field— but it would have been an interesting endgame, imo. For HL… he probably needs to end up with someone who genuinely loves him. Which might be impossible if he doesn’t get depowered. He’s going to have to be single dad parenting Ryan :/

* My happily ever after for them:

Homelander harvests her eggs and makes super babies via surrogate…. Juuuuust kiddingggg. I would have loved if Maeve never broke up with him but stayed on as the jaded, cool kid vaping in the bathroom while HL tries to reason with her and please her with romantic gestures, and never dumps her even though she’s undermining his clean cut earnest image and costing him points.

* who is the big spoon/little spoon:

I love HL being possessive of her, hovering around her, coming up behind her, trying to get into her space (Clarification: don’t condone irl, just compelling dynamic). He’s the big dumb eager spoon that her little spoon has to stave off periodically.

* what is their favorite non-sexual activity:

Apparently he liked weekend getaways to Europe with her. I think HL is into the glitz and PR of the relationship. But Maeve didn’t really enjoy any of that. I’d love to have had a glimpse into what HL references as understanding what it’s like for one another, being lonely at the top of the fame pyramid. Did they have quiet nights in where they watched movies and ate ice cream straight out of the pint container? We’ll probably never know from canon.

#thanks for the ask!#maevlander #queen maeve #homelander #the boys #the boys tv #meme #mystuff

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thetaylorfiles · 11 months

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Does your friend want to trade husbands? Mine is useless TS connection wise lmao You're winning the six degrees of separation game! Although you did have a friend who went on a date with Taylor years ago right? It's just a matter of time now before you run into her at a party or something. Girl, I'm here manifesting that for you!

This post is brought to you by my first dose of Concerta. I was recently-ish diagnosed (by a doctor) that I have HDHD. I tried another one that didn’t work and now I’m trying this. Today is my first day and, I must state that I had an espresso when I normally don’t, but I’m in the mood to organize, so things, and my mind feels clearer. It’s got to be placebo affect or the coffee but I’ll take it! Anyway this’ll be far too long I’m sure. (Oh hey, now you get why I’m so obsessed with t swift! Kaylor began as a special interest and thankfully, by the time I stopped believing, I was hooked on her music and personality. Oh my god what was my point? Okay, clearly adhd not cured! 😂 um it’s long? Don’t read if you don’t want?

——-

Answer:

Yes, but that doesn’t count as an actual TS encounter. And now that I’m Very Old, if I attempt to make that happen via any connections, it would be to get my daughter anything personal or signed from her or just anything as long as it focused on her.

I introduced her to Taylor slowly over the years. And now she’s obsessed. But in a 10 year old way. She doesn’t know much if folklore or evermore unless it’s exile because Mom was so fucking obsessed with it she had no choice to listen and assume I’m right that it’s best ever. She knows that hits and the deep cuts I make her listen to.

My love language is giving gifts. I hate getting them unless I’m so comfortable I’m married to you or you’re my child and you’ve written something. Ha. So I give her tons of makeup and what not. But I found my 4 lover books with the diary entries and the posters and left them out. She sheepishly inquired if she could look at them all…? I said, “they’re yours.”

There was a point. Oh, don’t forget the perimenopause. And the cannabis. That really contributes to being forgetful. Why am I writing so much?!?

Oh!!! Yeah, I was close friends with a guy that was a working actor and still is. He’s not recognizable by name unless you know actors really well. He’s a character actor that books all sorts of series and guest spots but always as a friend. He’s super hot. Well he was back in his 20s. He told us that he was daring her. We made fun of him (She wasn’t cool the ), but more just to annoy HIM. He wasn’t super super smart but he was so sweet but still had that bad boy swagger. You know? He was like a brother to me but I get whey women hit on him.

So back in early twenties he dates her for … I wanna say a few months. She didn’t live here on LA at the time as far as I knew but came out often. Maybe she had another house? Anyway, they were more friends who were attracted to one another who met up when both were in town. Only one of our group met her, his best friend. All we heard was that she was nice and far from a boring good southern girl. That she seemed like a city girl. Anyway, they hooked up off and on. They never went anywhere together as they weren’t together. They were each others last night call after date one and two failed to produce the necessary love spark. But they were both stupid hot.

That’s all I know. I never met her or saw pics. No wait. I did. I saw one of them together at her place wherever she stayed then. Why did I explain that? Please tell me you asked me to! I’m sorry. I’m so high and wanting to talk and like make and complete goals!! 🤣🤣🤣 k, night. Gotta watch some tv downstairs once kids have vanished. Shhh

I have a feeling I didn’t answer a single one of your questions, nor did I speak to whatever you wrote about. I apologize. If you were in person you’d love me. When I get high (vapes), it makes me so much damn more pleasant!

Oh my god. Go to sleep!! (Bethenny voice on Scary Island) I’m referring to myself by the way. K, night. Tv time.

#i’m going to regret this #these rumblings are unhinged I fear #go easy on me

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kellysrippdcock · 1 month

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Yesterday was the first day of school.

I’m out front with my kids taking first day pictures, talking to them, and just normal parent stuff. My ex’s neighbor, some fat gross guy who doesn’t shower, just comes up to me and fucking outs me as trans in front of everyone and this is a very country-conservative crowd of parents. Idk if anyone heard or noticed because I just got so angry and I was shaking trying to be cool. I haven’t talked to my kids about this yet, I’m still easing them into the idea of all of this, and I don’t like a fucking stranger just coming up to me like that. I’m upset my ex is just telling random people that I am trans.

Anyway I ignore the fuck. This dude and his girl have approached me before and they’re super weird. One time, while dropping the kids off at my ex’s, the girl followed me all the way to my truck trying to hit on me. Apparently the dude wants to watch me fuck his wife and then fuck his ass, according to my ex, and he seems the type. They have this super toxic, openly verbally-abusive, poverty enforced relationship and they have this delusion that they’re so cool and hip when really I think they need on a fucking sex offender registry. Dude is 💯 the “doesn’t matter how old she is if she consents” type.

This dude is so weird. I was at the pool with my kids once and they were also there and dude just ignores his girl and their two kids to hit on every girl around and I fucking watched him check out underage girls. I’m in the pool, trying to keep away from people and float on my back, and these two swim up and basically corner me. When they failed to get my attention they started fighting with each other like apparently it’s cool for dude to creep on underage girls if he can convince me to bang his girlfriend? If they see me anywhere they approach me even though I have made it clear I have no interest in these trashy people.

Anyway, back to the school bullshit. Apparently dude listed my ex as his daughter’s emergency pickup and I’m like “ok, but that doesn’t involve me” like dude implied I would be the emergency pickup on days I have MY kids or I’d let his creepy ass do the same for mine. Hell no, this dude screams groomer. He works at a smoke shop and like… I don’t care and I know you get shitty weed anyway, I contract for your boss. We are up on the front doors of the school, you know where they have all of the “Tobacco Free School” signs, and dude is hitting his vape rig which like really gets on my nerves. I chain-hit my vape nonstop but even I can put it down for the kids and this 300+ pound cocksucker is hitting his while trying to talk to me making me look like I’m associated with this trash.

Doors open time to take kids to their rooms. Dude just leaves his daughter with me and I am a stranger to this kid! Like I know we were at a school but what kind of parent just leaves their kid to the whims of someone they barely know? So now I have dumbfucks kid tagging along because I guess he only even came up with her to talk to me. I’m showing my kids their rooms and I turn around to this girl dragging my oldest away and I break her grip and I said “these are my kids they come with me, you go where you go, but not with me” and I told my son to never go anywhere alone with this girl because, to me, she’s the type to lead a kid out to the woods and Slenderman them. She didn’t say anything and waited until we hit a corner to try and get my son away from me without me noticing.

Since my oldest son and his daughter are neighbors and my son is new they were sat together. After school I picked my kids up and did the usual “how was your day”. Here’s where I want to get violent: This fat little, mountain dew accent having bitch raises her hand in the middle of class to tell EVERYONE my son has “girly things” and “girl toys” and likes “girl stuff” and has a “girl dad”. Why the fuck does this kid know about MY life and yet alone think she can talk shit about MY kid? First day of school and this bitch has to make things harder for my son? He considered her a friend. What pisses me off is I know the dad is talking about me and his daughter is picking it up. Obviously she is conditioned to think this shit is funny.

So I called my ex about it (they came and left the school before I got there) and she went the fuck off on her weird ass neighbors. I’m still upset she even told these people things about me but at least she doesn’t fuck around when it comes to the kids. I still feel like I’m gonna have to beat dad the fuck down but he smells so bad like legit I’d throw up if my skin touched his. But this fuck does not respect any boundaries for anyone. There’s just something so off and creepy about him even without his weird trans-fetish bullshit. The girl, wife or girlfriend or sister idk, is like clearly learning disabled and verbally abused into having no personality. This bitch is as spicy as water and thinks she can fuck ME?

I am a parent first and myself second. My transition is my own thing and does not reflect upon my kids or imply anything about them. I don’t beat my kids for touching Barbies like I was. I don’t homeschool my kids for being friends with too many girls. I teach my kids not to hate or make fun of other kids for their interests or how they dress. It just irks me so bad this whitetrash kid in her Goodwill clothes is going to raise her hand to spread shit on my son. His clothes were worth what her dad makes per paycheck. And I grew up in poverty. I know how it is, and I know it doesn’t excuse being a shit person. I work hard to make sure my kids have what I didn’t and I’ll be damned if they are made fun of for it.

Today was the second day of school.

My ex said her neighbors won’t talk to her anymore, and like the shit parents they are, told their daughter she deserved the hate and like NO! teach your kid to be better, tell them why people are upset, do something corrective! All he did was make his daughter feel unlikable for repeating something he probably said in front of her. They took her to school crying I guess. Am I happy the girl who made my kid have the worst first day of his life cried over it? HELL YES! But I’m sad too that her parents are doing nothing for her. They’re too busy being depraved pervs to give their daughter valid attention so she pulls these stunts on school. I just see 0 affection from the parents and they’re always too busy being perverts to be decent parents for 5 minutes. I don’t want to make accusations without any real evidence or anything, but the way dude treats his daughter is a major red flag and having seen him checkout obviously middle-school aged girls makes me wonder…

Anyway, I pick my kids up and ask about their days. My oldest told the girl she’s not his friend, she’s not allowed to come over, and not to talk to him or about him. He said all day she basically stalked and nagged at him which again I can totally tell is something she learned from her toxic parents considering her mom basically followed me out to my truck to nag and make puppy faces trying to get sex. I guess, for attention, the girl today decided to eat erasers and put them in her nose which grossed my son out (we don’t eat erasers in my house) so he talked to the teacher and moved him. Now the girl is the isolated weirdo in class which isn’t good. This girl clearly has been under-nurtured (she seriously speaks like she is 3), expects attention from negative behaviors, doesn’t respect boundaries, and has control issues.

Next time dude sees me he better know his fucking place because I can get OR’ed from jail for beating his ass and be back out in time not to miss any days of work. It’s one thing to just fucking out me at the school like a piece a shit but when your kid is repeating it solely for the detriment of one of mine then I’m not about doing some psycho shit. I am living my life, I don’t fucking know you, and don’t think you can hookup with me because my ex babysits your kid because you’re a deadbeat parent. I don’t fuck dudes especially ones that look like rejected-juggalo air duster addicts. I hate how dudes find out you’re trans and think they can use you to live out their creepy fantasies. Fucking annoy me some more and see how quick I find some internet predator hunters to come catch that ass. I am not that tranny, honey. I WILL fuck you up. Grow the fuck up and be a parent. Stop trying to look good by associating with me. I look good because I don’t associate with you.

God that was such a long cunty rant but aaaaaaagh! Dudes think being horny is being tolerant. It’s not. Being tolerant is leaving me the fuck alone like everyone leaves you alone. Let me do me in peace and leave my kids out of it. I don’t care what you think you know about me because you don’t know me.

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call-me-aesthetic · 3 years

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If Twisted Wonderland was an American Public School

WARNING: There are some slight sensitive topics that are featured in here! Reader discretion is advised!

Part 2 can be found here

Heartslabyul

Riddle Rosehearts:

- That one preppy girl who takes all honors and AP classes 😑

- Wants everyone to know that he’s becoming a doctor one day for his strict parents or he’ll dishonor the family

- Reminds the teacher about homework, knowing well that he’ll get slander for it

- Complains about how he got a 90 on his test or a B on his report card, a try hard much?

- Wears a cardigan with thicc but cute glasses since he’s one of those people with can’t see shit on the board so he has to move to the front of the class

Ace Trappola:

- The SoundCloud rapper, that’s it

- “Wanna listen to my mixtape? It’s pretty fire, my guy.” 😩🔥

- You will not miss him BLASTING out some song on his Bluetooth speaker, that shit be echoing through the hallways

- Tells you to stop what you’re doing only for him to either sing horribly or do a backflip, thinking that he’s so cool

- Wears a Supreme jacket with AirPods and waves on his head

Deuce Spade:

- Assuming that he’s still a delinquent, he’s that kid with the most fucked up school record

- Not much of a bully but will still talk shit to your face without caring, might even throw stuff at you during a lesson and you would be the one getting in trouble instead of him 🗿

- If he ever gets mad, it would be overdramatic like kicking the desks, punching the lockers, or walking out of the classroom unannounced and everyone would look at each other wondering wtf happened

- Covers the entire desks with drawings of skulls and those “s” if you know what I mean

- Wears Champion hoodies, wants you to know that he’s broke and rich at the same time

Trey Clover:

- The guy that’s not really popular but everyone knows him since he’s in all their classes

- Most people might have a crush on him because he’s REALLY nice 😳👉👈

- Gives off “older brother” vibes based on the way he looks and acts, like offering you a ride home if you beg ask nicely

- Secretly bakes creme brulee but doesn’t want to mess with the flow so he sticks to the status quo

- Wears the school’s hoodie just because he thinks it looks good on him, and the fact that he doesn’t know what else to wear

Cater Diamond:

- Hot Cheetos girl 🥵

- Has a whole buffet of food in his backpack and will not hesitate to eat them during a lesson, no sharing either sorry

- Excuses himself to the bathroom or full on skips class just to film a Tiktok

- Has about 100 followers on Instagram Magicam and brags about how he’s famous

- Wears a Thrasher hoodie with large hoop earrings and his hair in a bun

Savanaclaw

Leona Kingscholar:

- The kid who flunked their freshman year that also sort of vibes with new classmates

- Always gets mistaken as a teacher by people since he looks and sounds old

- Knows the lessons but still fails them anyways, didn’t really give a damn either 🙄

- Captain of every sports club you can think of, never actually plays but has a lot of knowledge on them

- Wears the school’s letterman from years ago since it used to be his brother’s and that he’s too lazy to buy a new one

Ruggie Bucchi:

- That one kid who NEVER has money for the book fair or any other school event

- Always has to ask his classmates for some cash

- If he somehow does, then he’s one of those kids who buys Diary of the Wimpy Kid or the World Record books

- If he’s feeling cheap, he’ll buy the “cool stuff” like the chocolate scented calculator or fruit snacks 😭

- Wears oversized hoodies and basketball shorts that are clearly hand-me-downs

Jack Howl:

- That one athletic kid who’s both scary good and competitive when it comes to school games like football or soccer

- Literally the best player on his team and without him, they’re trash as hell 💀

- Tries his absolute best to support his teammates without yelling at them for how dumb they are

- “KICK THE FUCKING BALL! DO YOUR LEGS EVEN WORK?!”

- Wears the school’s jersey just to show off his “school spirit”

Octavinelle

Azul Ashengrotto:

- The kid who sell snacks for “charity” but everyone knows he’s keeping the money to himself

- If you don’t have cash or try to negotiate with him, the only thing he’ll do is raise the price up

- “What do you mean you don’t have ten bucks? I can see it in your pocket.”

- Just bring nothing with you, he’ll doing anything to steal your stuff 🤭

- Wears a collar shirt with a tie and khakis that have pockets to keep his glasses and money in

Jade Leech:

- The kid who puts on a goody two shoes facade but is actually a stoner

- Only does “safe” drugs like vape but occasionally smokes weed, mostly in the bathroom or behind the school 🌬

- Can play it off and hide the scent when he’s high, teachers never suspect anything from him

- No one really cares to stop him unless he gets caught or something idk

- Wears clothing that either makes him look like a businessman or a junky, there’s nothing in between

Floyd Leech:

- The kid that’s plays basketball or volleyball just because he’s hella tall, and is actually good at the sports but doesn’t put much effort into them

- Always stays behind after gym, even though the teacher tries to make him leave for his next class 😬

- “I swear after this one shot, I’ll go to class.” *He never made that shot*

- Will jump you no matter who or where you are, and will get angry if you step on his new shoes

- Wears the jersey of any famous team with the latest pair of Jordan sneakers

Scarabia

Kalim Al Asim:

- VSCO girl at best, don’t lie to me now 🤡

- The only words he knows are “And I oop– sksksk.” and “Save the turtles.”

- Walks during a track meet while everyone else is running and sweating hard, the teacher doesn’t care either

- Doesn’t really do anything in gym but talks to his classmates and stands near the water fountain to refill his Hydro flask

- Wears tie dye shirts with cute scrunchies

Jamil Viper:

- That one quiet kid who everybody thinks is a serial killer but he’s actually not, I swear

- He just wants school to be over and spend the rest of his summer relaxing 😔

- Although he shouldn’t abuse his “power,” he‘ll move his hands in his pockets or backpack to make it look like he’s about to pull a weapon out.

- “Chill, I’m just grabbing a pencil.” *Everyone in the class started crying*

- Wears dark colored hoodies that intimidates people but are actually comfy

Pomefiore

Vil Schoenheit:

- The baddie popular girl 😌💅✨

- Arrives to school late with a Starbucks in hand from his local Target

- Fixes himself every 5 seconds like reapplying his lipgloss or spraying Bath and Body Works cherry blossom perfume

- Uses acrylic nails and long hair extensions as weapons during a cat fight

- Wears a crop top with ripped jeans and those clout sunglasses

Rook Hunt:

- That creepy guy in the hallways who tries to get your attention, even if you don’t know him

- Scares people when he says, “Ayo, where my hug at?” 🥶💯

- Uses at least 10 cans of Axe body spray a week after gym class, which stinks up the locker rooms

- Waves at you if he passes your class, even walking into the room just to say hi

- Wears literally anything but always include a hat

Epel Felmier:

- The artist girl who just wants to be alone 🧑‍🎨

- Purposely draws in front of you but pretends like you’re not looking

- If you complement him, he’ll just brush it off and proceeds to diss himself

- “Thanks but I’m not THAT good at drawing, teehee.” *Insert Radio Rebel face*

- Wears a hoodie or a cardigan with big pockets to put his art supplies in

Ignihyde

Idia Shroud:

- I don’t even need to tell you who he is, y’all already know ahaha 🥴

- Sneaks a whole PlayStation in his backpack so he can play with it during lunch

- Is on his phone 24/7 even in class to the point where teachers don’t care anymore

- Tries to get people into anime but only to little success

- Wears a shirt of any anime character or that damn ahegao hoodie, girl bye

Ortho Shroud:

- The nerdy kid who’s known for destroying others at many games

- Plays classics like D&D, Yugioh, Pokémon, the whole shabang

- Daily Beyblade battles during recess with everyone surrounding him, the menacing aura radiates off of him

- Will steal your things if you lose to him but gives it back a week later cuz he’s sweet 🥰

- Wears light up Sketchers shoes and those Minecraft shirts you find at Old Navy

Diasomnia

Malleus Draconia:

- The theatre kid who also goes to band practice, change my mind 👁👄👁

- Takes his role seriously when it comes to school plays and concerts, even if he gets casted as a damn tree or doesn’t go solo

- Remembers the songs and their lyrics to any musical you name, a really good singer at that too

- Plays almost every instrument, you definitely know this since you can hear him down the hallways during a test

- Wears a white button up shirt, black pants with fancy dress shoes, and top it all off with a fricking Rolex watch

Lilia Vanrouge:

- The weird guy who pranks people and vandalizes school property in every way possible

- If you ever get a textbook with a message that tells you to go to a certain page only for you to found a picture of a dick, yeah that was him 😒

- When using a Chromebook, he’ll leave a tab open on YouTube so when the next person uses it, pray that your ears will still work by tomorrow

- During lunch, he is a literal DEMON that mixes milk with chicken nuggets together and having the audacity to eat it too

- Wears an oversized raincoat or a windbreaker but idk wtf kind of things he has hiding underneath

Silver:

- That guy in class who consumes Monster energy drinks and falls asleep 99% of the time but somehow manages to pass the class 🤷

- Whenever he’s awake, he’ll talk to the teachers since he’s basically friends with them for some reason

- Writes his name out of boredom on any desk you sit on but in different places, sometimes around the corners or the sides

- Has a sixth sense because he’ll wake up if you try to draw on his face and if you did get something on him, it’s on sight

- Wears those colorful hoodies that zips all the way up to cover his face with a matching backpack, it’s pretty cool ngl

Sebek Zigvolt:

- That kid who literally knows everything about historical wars and will show it off during class

- Also has knowledge on weaponry, which has people questioning him but he’s just very dedicated on serving his country and people

- Knows how to fight and defend himself from a bitch since he spent his summer at a military boot camp, put respect on my man’s name 😤

- Honestly a great partner for a group project, actually does the given work but not the whole thing for you

- Wears anything that has camo pattern and chunky combat boots

I only made this because me and my friends were talking about our school memories so yeah. This is based from my experience so they might not be exactly accurate. Might even be a part two if you want.

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siarrawrites · 4 years

Text

Rating Various Star Wars Curses

a guide w much real swearing, inspired by a midnight convo with @kckenobi

-----------------

crink/crinking -- what the actual fuck is this supposed to be. Who came up with this??? We’re only a few letters away from ‘crinkled’ or even ‘tinkled’, god. No self respecting Space Adult is going to use this.--- -2/10 pls try again

sithspit-- a classic. can be found everywhere in fic. kind of sounds like you’re hissing, which the sith would probably appreciate actually. (do normal space ppl use this or is it just a jedi thing tho bc most star wars citizens dont seem to know abt the sith???) --- 9/10 very sssssssmooth

holy sith!-- again with the sith?? ok i guess. a pretty good alternative to ‘holy shit’ but lacks the pazzazz of sithspit which is 10x more fun to say ---6/10 reliable but uninspired

frizz/frizzled -- what is this, the magic school-bus? I love Ms. Frizzle with all my heart of course, which is why im disturbed by seeing her name used as an approximation of fucked (it kinda sounds like jizz too which I HATEE). I can maybe see it as a kiddie swear like frick though. ---3/10 what the frizz is this

dwang-- ...kind of strange but you know what I’ll accept it --5/10 haha dwang the rock johnson

e chu ta-- a solid fuck you. definitely sounds like a space language, and has a nice ring to it when said with passion. works for characters ages 9-->999, thank you kiddie anakin for this gem. --10/10, ‘a fine addition to my collection!!’

sleemo-- sounds like the word ‘sleazy’ and for once the real word association does it a favor. You hear this and just KNOW what kind of person it describes. ---8/10 honestly huttese curses can get it

farkled-- ...this is the name of a fucking dice game. also it sounds nasty --0/10 get sued pls

blast-- idk if this is actually a star wars curse or an irl thing, but it absolutely should be. you got BLASTers for cripes sake this shit writes itself -- 10/10 it just makes sense honey

son of a blaster-- ok we get it guns aren’t a thing in space. except they are. sob is great i guess but consider son of a slugthrower boom alliteration plus badass space guns lets go boys ---7/10 alliteration is key

kark/karking-- amazing. inspired. beautiful. I regularly forget this isn’t an actual thing and use it in everyday life. gotta love the hard consonants she is cathartic as kark to use. -- 50/10 she just hits different ok

kriff/kriffing-- basically ‘frick’. Actually sounds like a kid-ification of kark and I just really admire that about her. 10/10 all the cool initiates say kriff

bantha poodoo-- the one that started this whole discussion. listen, this is fine when you’re 9 year old anakin skywalker and say ‘yippee’ unironically but for anyone else this is just embarrassing -- 2/10 ok if you’re baby i guess

skrog/skrogging-- at first I was gonna rate this one low bc it sounds weird and is a synonym for fuck (which just ain’t it). but then I thought about it and realized that if you replace bantha poodoo with bantha skrog you actually have a somewhat decent word for space shit. --- 6/10 we done figured it out boys

snark/snarking-- this is already a real word. why are you stealing actual live words out of the english dictionary sir that’s i l l e g a l --- 0/10 for plagiarism

druk-- a solid replacement for shit, and more serious than skrog (though bantha skrog sounds better than bantha druk imo). gotta love those consonants, and a ‘drukload’ of problems is a phrase that just works. 9/10 will always be there for you

krong-- I just... I dont... know? How i feel abt this. reminds me of king kong donkey kong AND kronk from emperors new groove. maybe thats my own brains fault but also where does this work?? ‘dont krong things up’ just use kark? ‘bantha krong’ just use skrog or druk. In conclusion? --4/10 ok but you can do better

schuta-- we’re branching out folks! finally, a twi’leki curse. she’s catchy and very fun to say, but it does mean slut, and we respect women in this household. If you wanna make a very despicable character say it though it will help make us all want to beat ‘em up :) ---5/10 all women are QUEENS george

vape/vaping-- ... ill give u a pass bc I dont think vaping was a thing when this word was made, but this straight up doesn’t work in the blessed decade of 2020 ---1/10 you’re on thin fucking ice

shab/shabuir-- not to be confused w ‘shebs’ which is just mandalorian booty, this is mandalorian shit. Sounds like a real word, is mandalorian which automatically makes everything 10x more legit, and has that lovely insult variation! ---7/10 truly some shit I can get behind (heh)

vong-- we don’t mention the y**zhan v*ng in this household --- -∞/10 legends can get right tf outta here

shavit-- friends, I had to look this one up to make sure it wasn’t actually a real swear word. I think I’ve picked this one up through osmosis reading fic bc I’ve definitely used this in real life. that’s quality folks. --- 10000+/10, will unironically say this from now on

-------------

KC, I cried laughing at some of these I truly dont know where they come up with this stuff.

there’s a lot more where these came from but i didnt feel like doing all of them, heres the link tho , knock yourselves out

#this got real KARKING long didnt it #sorry not sorry #my first legit post tho!#look at that #took for-fucking-ever #my posts #my stuff #star wars #star wars curses #star wars swears #rating

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unloved-cadillac · 4 years

Note

hello! good evening! sending love from the philippines <3 can I request some hc's for levi, armin, gojou, and sukuna for having a smoker gf? like how do they deal with it (bec afaik nicotine can lower??? your sex drive lol) and would they tolerate her or not? thank u so much <3

C/n: hello there! This is new. Thanks for requesting and I hope that you enjoy🤍

———————————————————————

HCs on Levi, Armin, Gojo & Sukuna having a Smoker GF.

Levi:

He finds it disgusting.

He doesn’t like the smell nor the way it tastes. He tried smoking once and ugh.

The person that calls it “Cancer Sticks.”

When he found out that you smoked, he subtly tried to get you to stop. He didn’t want you to get sick in the long term.

Levi would hide the cigs sometimes, other times he’ll hide your lighter.

Won’t kiss you if you just smoked. He’d force you to go and brush your teeth and use a special mouthwash to get the taste out.

If you’re being honest, you did cut down smoking ever since dating Levi. The effort to wash and rinse after every single smoke was getting annoying.

So you stopped. Because you loved Levi and listened to him.

He smirks to himself that his tricks finally worked. Now he can kiss you whenever.

====

Armin:

Armin pretends to be okay with it, but whenever he sees you pull out a cigarette he just wants to take it and smash it on the floor.

He doesn’t care that you like it, he will tell you the dangers of smoking and how sick you can get.

“It causes cancer you know.” “Yes I know, Armie.” “A lot of people die from cancer.” “ARMIN! It’s four in the morning. Shut up.”

Just like Levi, he’ll try to hide your cigarettes. But you always find them making he curses under his breath.

He finally gave up on trying to stop you but he was surprised when he didn’t see you smoke the whole day.

“You didn’t go out to smoke.” “Yeah. About that. I saw this video of the two lungs side by side. One a smokers lung and the other normal. Freaked me the fuck out. So I stopped.” You say and he hugs you. “I’m glad you did.”

“Glad.” He was ecstatic.

~~~~

Gojo:

I see Gojo in accepting it. To a certain extent.

When he first met you, he saw that you would smoke like one or two a day. But when you two got together, it was a pack or two a day.

Gojo started getting worried as fuck. He despised the cigaretts more than any curse.

He’s the type of person who would throw water on you when you smoked.

“GOJO! WHAT THE FUCK?!” “Nothing.”

He wants to tell you to stop but at the same time it’s your life. You can do what you want. But at the same time, FUCK SMOKING.

Gojo came up with a plan. It wasn’t any better but he felt it was lower risk.

“A vape pen?” You look at it curiously while Gojo smiled. “Yeah. It comes with all kinds of flavors and it smells so gooooood.” He drags the good making you laugh.

“Go, do you want me to quit smoking?” You ask and he stiffens. “U-Uh. Well, I. I don’t want you to not stop. I just don’t want to be that controlling boyfriend who tells you want to do and shit. It’s your life and it’s your choice mmf!” He gets cut off by your lips on his and smiles.

You pull away and cup his cheek. “If it was bothering you that much just tell me. I’ll try to stop. For you.”

Everything works out in the end.

====

Sukuna:

Listen, he smokes too. But not as much as you.

He thought you looked cool with a cigarette in between your lips. Until he realized that he wanted something else on between them.

That’s when he realized that it interfered in your sex life.

He would start to kiss your neck and place his hands in between your thighs but all you did was say, “Babe. I’m super tired.” He will pout.

It happened for two weeks before finally he put a stop to it.

“Y/n. Look at me.” He says and you pick your head from your book. “You need to stop smoking.” You raise your eyebrows at his sudden concern. “Why? You smoke so what’s the difference?”

“The difference is I’ll stop too. I’ve been reading up on it and it lowers our chances of having kids. I don’t want that. I want to have everything with you. So please.” He places his hand on yours and you almost start crying.

“Okay. Okay I’ll stop. But if I see you smoking I’ll-” “I know. You’ll let Itadori poke my eyes out.”

———————————————————————

“Gojooooo-sannnnnnn!!!!! Sukuna is the horniest out of all them.”

🖤🤍Thanks for reading🤍🖤

-Caddy.

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runwithwolvcs · 3 years

Text

You Know I'm No Good - four

First Day

Warnings: mentions of drugs and alcohol, mentions of sex

[photo of Tallulah and Lina]

don't call me kid, don't call me baby, look at this godforsaken mess that you made me

Tallulah was the first one awake in the morning, the sunrise just peeking through her blinds as she laid in bed on her side, staring at the wall. She struggled to get back to sleep and tossed and turned, feeling an uncomfortable pit in her stomach that she decided had something to do with it being her first day at La Push Tribal School.

Starting a new school in the second semester of her senior year did not bother her as much as it should have, what concerned her more was that she was walking into a school that never gets new students, let alone mid semester. All eyes were going to be on her, and she was sure that some of them had already conjured up their own preconceived notions of her. Oh the joys of small town gossip, she thought to herself as she climbed out of bed, grabbing her clothes for the day. She told herself that making friends was not a must here, because as soon as she graduates she will be back in Seattle with her old, real friends, living the life that she wants to live. She could let herself be picky, or else she’ll end up with a Josie, who seems trustworthy on the outside, but isn’t in the end. Tallulah rolled her eyes at the thought itself, if that's how she wants to be then so be it.

Tallulah quickly changed into her black tank and oversized flannel shirt, before pulling on her jeans, she tried to tame her hair without ruining her natural waves into a frizzy mess. She wasn't one for much makeup, especially not for school considering the frequent rain on pacific northwest.

Rushing downstairs to the kitchen, the uncomfortable pit curbing her appetite, Tallulah settled on just coffee, as she poured it into her mug she had grabbed from the cupboard, she heard footsteps entering the kitchen. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw Lenna out of the corner of her eye, all dolled up as if she were going to Paris Fashion Week.

“I heard about what Josie did.” Lenna stated as she searched through the fridge, “you’ll get used to it.” This made Tallulah scoff audibly, “get used to being thrown under the bus for doing absolutely nothing wrong beside talking to some guy I’ve never even met before yesterday?” she asked sarcastically, turning to face her younger sister, mug in hand. “No, well, yes. It just means she did something she doesn’t want to get in trouble for, so she throws gasoline on someone else's fire to make it seem bigger than the one she started.” She keeps her eye on the tall, raven-haired girl as she closes the door, “She means well Tally.” I bet, she thought to herself. Maybe this is what sisters do, and she's the one that's being unreasonable. To be fair, she's never had to deal with someone snitching right in front of her face to her mother. At least she had the guts to do it at the dinner table.

She watched as Lenna looked over her outfit, making a face that Tallulah couldn’t quite comprehend, “is there something wrong with my outfit?” she asked, eyebrows raised in challenge. Lenna shook her head, “Nope, not at all. Between that, the tattoos and the nicotine addiction, I’d say you’ll fit right in with a few groups at school. I can point them out if you’d like, I heard dad tossed your vape maybe you can snag one today.” Tallulah shook her head before taking a sip of her cooling coffee, “I can make my own friends, and I’m not addicted” she fought the urge to roll her eyes again as their dad walked into the kitchen, clearly dressed for work. “Tally, Lenny, ready for school? Dakota picked up your sister already this morning, something about a project that's not finished yet” the short laugh that came from Lenna did not go unnoticed by Tallulah, but she said nothing, nodding her head at her fathers question. “I have to go to a tribal meeting tonight with Kira, so it’s going to be pizza for dinner, Lenny can pick it up on her way home from work, right Len?” he asked as he filled his to-go mug with coffee, even though he really wasn't asking, “Tal,” he said, looking directly at his eldest daughter, “I know this has been a big change in just a few days, but you’re doing great kid, but let's keep those rules in mind when making friends today,” clearly referring to something she has no clue about. “So, you mean I can’t skip school and sneak Paul through my window while you’re gone?” she joked half heartedly. She had no intention of ever speaking to him today, but seeing the looks on Lenna and their dad's face was probably the best start to her day she was going to get. She finished off her coffee and placed her mug in the sink, grabbing her book bag from the counter and heading to the front door, yelling ‘kidding!’ over her shoulder as she left, while her dad yelled ‘have fun!’ right back at her.

Tallulah drove in silence to the school, following the directions Josie had shown her during their day out, for once wanting to be early. She wanted to scope out all her classrooms beforehand to minimize the amount of interaction she would have to have with anyone in order to just keep her head down and float by as unnoticed as she could.

As she pulled into the small parking lot there were very few students and teachers mulling around. The school itself was small, only two stories, with a few portables that were quite run down. Nothing like her old school of 5000 students, every hallway crowded and parking lot full every day.

Tallulah parked her car and pulled out her phone from her pocket, checking the few messages she had, despite it only being 8 in the morning. One message was from her mom, wishing her well on her first day, telling her she had shipped the rest of her personal belongings that she may want or need and that she loved her. Tallulah rolled her eyes, she loved her so much she didn’t want to deal with her anymore. She checked some more of her messages and replied to those that warranted them only stopping as the incoming call notification lit up her screen.

A photo of Lina, her best friend, and her graced the screen, she quickly hit accept before placing the phone to her ear, breathing out a quickie ‘hello’. The two haven’t been able to have a conversation in days to discuss the tragedy that had unfolded the night her mom caught her sneaking into her bedroom, the dramatic gasp on the other line made her smile, “You picked up!” Lina all but shouted excitedly, before saying to someone else ‘told you she would’, clearly she wasn’t alone. “Of course I did, Li. Just because I've been shipped off to the middle of nowhere doesn’t mean I dropped out of school.” she said looking at the tiny building, that more students were now filing into. “Besides, I always answer your calls.” she stated, which made Lina laugh into the phone, “Right, right. Well I was just calling to see how you were, Kits here too.” she said and she could hear Kit bid a hello in the background, “and we wanted to invite you to this party that's happening at some club in Port Angeles next Friday. We figured it would give you some time to ask your dad if you can come or plan an escape. He can’t keep you from us forever.” she rambled, clearly excited.

She knew what club she was talking about, they had been planning on going once they had all turned 18. As exciting as it sounded, she knew her dad would never go for it, and sneaking out to Port Angeles and back would be next to impossible. “I don’t know about that, Li, but I'll try. I’m sure I could convince him to let you guys come out here if he doesn’t budge?” she asked absentmindedly, hoping she’d take the bait. Tallulah listened as Lina talked to someone away from the speaker before hearing the phone be passed to someone new, she furrowed her brows at the silence before the new speaker breathed out, “Luie.”

Xander.

The only person on planet earth who was allowed to call her ‘Luie’. The nickname started with him and ended with him. She hated the nickname when he had first started using it, he would say it in such a condescending way. Like he was reprimanding a child, but it grew on her as her relationship with him developed. They had never dated, but everyone assumed they were with how touchy-feely they were with each other. But, they both hated commitment, saying that it was the root of all sadness, and they had enough of that in their life already. As if that stopped them from hurting each other anyways. Xander was all of her firsts, first friend, first kiss, first time drinking alcohol with him, first cigarette, first time sneaking out, and first hookup. It's why she always went back to him after a fight, no matter how bad it was, all her good memories are tied to him.

“Hey, Xan” she said softly, “Are you coming to Port Angeles for the party?” he asked in a nonchalant tone, knowing she could never say no to him. “I want to..” she started, “But no promises. My dads a lot stricter compared to my mom.” Tallulah heard him grunt in acknowledgment. He wasn’t going to beg, or plead her to come like Kit or Lina would, he knew he didn’t have to. “Well, let us know, ya?” he stated, voices in the background signaled that they were most likely getting ready to take the train to school, like she would be in normal circumstances. “Oh, and Luie, have a don’t do anything I wouldn’t do on your first day.” she could practically hear the grin that she knew he had before the line went dead, he wasn’t much for formal goodbyes.

Sighing, she shoved her phone in her pocket before exiting her car, grabbing her bag off of the passenger seat and slinging it over her shoulder. She made sure to lock the car before placing her keys in her bag and grabbing her timetable as she walked towards the entrance of the school. She was too busy trying to figure out what classroom she needed to head to first that she wasn’t paying any attention to any of her surroundings. Hence why she walked head on into someone, dropping the white sheet of paper in the process. Hot hands steadying her by the arms. It felt as if she had walked straight into a brick wall, she would’ve laughed it off if it wasn’t the root of all her problems so far in La Push.

“Are you stalking me?” she asked the older man, everywhere she went, there he was. Paul shook his head with a chuckle, causing the teen to glare up at him. “Well aren’t you a little too old to be hanging around a high school?” she questioned, arms crossing over her body as the heat from his hands had made her realize just how cold it was outside once they were off of her. “Relax, I was just dropping someone off.” he stated, his voice was deeper than it was the day before, like he had just woken up. She averted her eyes from him as she could feel the blush heat to her face at how silly she must have sounded. Of course that's why he's here. She hadn’t realized he had picked up her schedule for her until he read out a name from it, “First period: Miss. Young.You’ll like her, everyone does.” he said while handing her back the slip. She nodded her head, “right, well i should go find her class then.” she mumbled as she took a step back from him, he responded by giving her the directions to the class, which made her want to question how he knew that but Tallulah wasn’t sure if she wanted to know the answer, so instead, she thanked him and walked away heading towards the front doors, each step closer she filled more and more with dread, wanting to turn around and get in her car and drive away as far as she could.

She turned back to where she had left Paul standing to see him still there, only now he was talking on the phone. His whole demeanor had changed, he looked rigid and frustrated. Before she turned to completely walk through the doors, he caught her eye and gave her a small smile, the feeling of dread dissipating in that moment as she entered her new school.

#paul lahote fanfic #paul lahote #paul lahote imagine #paul lahote x oc #twilight wolf pack #twilight wolves #twilight #leah clearwater #seth clearwater #emily young #embry call #sam uley #you know im no good #chapter 4

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jordankennedy · 4 years

Text

every avatar i can think of and their relationship to recreational drugs and alcohol

jon sims: only drinks those fruity cocktails that don’t taste like alcohol. seems like someone who has never done drugs but has absolutely snorted speed in university and only georgie knows about it

martin blackwood: doesn’t drink. has smoked weed before but has justified concern for his own health and doesn’t make a habit of it

tim stoker: likes and hates drinking beer in equal measure. seems like someone who does drugs but never actually has

sasha james: academically enjoys edibles but prefers to just drink anything blue

not-sasha james: drinks straight tonic water or margarita mix and inhales the fumes off of sharpie markers

gertrude robinson: smokes menthols and puts whiskey in her coffee. doesn’t do drugs and if you ask she’ll just squint at you in that old lady way. has allowed gerard keay to smoke weed in her office before

elias bouchard: still smokes but it makes him cough a lot so he only does it in private. used to drink laudanum but can’t find it anywhere anymore so now he just makes do with weed and really expensive gin

melanie king: likes daiquiris but only if they’re a flavor other than strawberry. vapes exclusively blue raspberry and watermelon flavors

basira hussain: only ever drinks just enough to avoid getting drunk. has never been on drugs and doesn’t want to. would pick up a joint with her thumb and pointer fingers like it was toxic waste

daisy tonner: has only been drunk once and hated it. has never done drugs but kind of wants to just so she can say she has. hates vapes and stares at melanie directly in the eye until she leaves whenever she does it within six feet of her

georgie barker: hates the taste of all alcohol. owns many novelty souvenir bongs purchased from various tourist attractions around europe. her favorite is the one that looks like a bottle of honey shaped like a bear

peter lukas: likes a lot of weird craft beer and thinks he’s oppressed for it. vapes also but only gross old man flavors like mint and butterscotch

jane prentiss: likes red wine. would smoke weed if offered it but has no idea how to go about acquiring it herself

timothy hodge: drinks fucked up cocktails that would kill anyone over the age of thirty-five. will do molly at parties and then go home and sleep for fifteen straight hours and he does this every friday

raymond fielding: drinks brandy out of a crystal glass like people do in the movies. extremely catholic but was also twenty years old in the 1960s. tried lsd one time and the web told him to stop throwing away his bright future so he never did it again

agnes montague: doesn’t drink because diego molina told her when she was like eight that she would explode if she did. would vape if she had ever heard of it but tragically hasn’t

julia montauk: astronomical tolerance for everything so she usually doesn’t even bother. drinks a lot of whiskey bc she likes how it tastes

maxwell rayner: drinks laudanum

trevor herbert: canonically has done heroin. has since kicked his addiction and doesn’t do or drink anything anymore

oliver banks: does xanax but he technically has a prescription. says he smokes weed for his anxiety but it actually just makes it worse

jared hopworth: advocates for allowing safe steroid use but would rather die than do it himself. refuses to drink on principle but when he was still a normal human he drank natty light

gerard keay: drinks one shot of everclear every morning. also says he smokes for his anxiety but it actually just makes it worse. prefers regular cigarettes

simon fairchild: also drinks laudanum

natalie ennis: drinks one (1) glass of champagne every new year’s eve. calls all mind-altering substances “temptations from the mouth of the devil”

michael the stortion: never got the chance to do drugs before getting spiralized and now they don’t do anything to him so he’s super pissed off about it

sarah baldwin: likes fruity rum. smokes a lot of weed

daniel rawlings: smokes weed as well. makes sarah roll his joints for him

john amherst: refuses to exist within ten feet of people smoking anything. thinks penicillin is a mind-altering substance and is mildly scared of it. doesn’t bother with alcohol but would drink bong water if he knew what it was

callum brodie: has never drunk alcohol or done drugs due to being thirteen. has yet to grow out of his “smoking cigarettes is badass” phase

nikola orsinov: made of plastic and therefore can’t drink or do drugs but would be on acid literally constantly if she was able

helen the stortion: puts ketamine in her own drinks for flavor

jordan kennedy: went to liberal arts college and lived off of tequila and mdma for six months. has since stopped doing drugs altogether because his job involves driving and he doesn’t trust himself to do that while high but still holds alcohol like a monster

annabelle cane: drinks peach white claws and smokes her joints through a 1920s cigarette holder

karolina gorka: drinks stoli out of the bottle. too cool to do drugs but has eaten a weed brownie by accident before

jude perry: drinks fireball whiskey if she feels like being normal and unleaded gasoline if she doesn’t. canonically does coke but freaks out around needles

mike crew: doesn’t drink. forgoes weed in favor of doing coke in public bathrooms with jude. complains that adderall doesn’t do anything but he just has undiagnosed adhd

jan kilbride: doesn’t drink or do drugs anymore because astronauts aren’t supposed to but he did acid one time in college and it almost gave him an anxiety induced heart attack

eugene vanderstock: also does coke with jude but in a significantly less companionable manner. its more of a competition but nobody knows what they’re competing against each other for, least of all the two of them

manuela dominguez: will spit at you if you offer her anything but drinks a lot of wine and keeps a box of oxy in a drawer

hezekiah wakely: smokes opium

tova mchugh: somehow a facebook wine mom without having kids. outwardly condemns drugs of any kind in a very holier-than-thou way but has also done coke more than once

emma harvey: drinks vodka out of water bottles. rolls her own joints, puts just enough regular tobacco in them to mask the weed smell, and tells people they’re regular cigarettes

adelard dekker: has never done drugs in his life but is not morally opposed to the idea, he just doesn’t feel like it

#ask to tag? idk i just needed to get this down #also yes i KNOW dekker and sasha and tim arent avatars i know i get it. i know. theyre on this list anyway #drugs tw #alcohol tw

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thatweeboverthereisthirsty · 4 years

Note

those twst vaping/smoking headcanons are beautiful and i love them

can i get some rook, cater, sebek, trey, and riddle next?

I’m glad you like them so much! I don’t write for Sebek yet but I only do 4 characters per headcanon request anyways so I hope you don’t mind. I’ve had a lot of fun with these and hope they are just as funny as the last ones!

Rook Hunt:

Is like super good at noticing things

Like assassin good

It's a little scary

So he already knew that you were a smoker

At first he was too polite to do anything about it but after you started dating he started stealing your cigarettes

“Hey Rook do you know where my cigarettes went?”

“My love I have no idea”

Yeah right

Sneaky bastard

But we love you for it

Highkey you never smoke again just cause he always manages to ruin or take the packs

You gave up after a while anyways lol

Cater Diamond:

Absolutely appalled

To the point where he needs to take a selfie of his shocked face

He takes the time to post it before looking at you with the same shocked face

“That. Is not healthy!”

...ok Cater

You are very unsure of what's going on

He’s staring at you and you’re staring at him

Then he walks over and picks the vape out of your hand

Walks it over to the toilet

Flushes it

“Ok missy that better be the last time I ever see a vape in your possession-EEEEEEEE”

Lowkey the toilet regurgitated a bunch of water and stuff because vape pens aren't supposed to be in the system

Silly Cater

Now your feet are wet

You make him explain the situation to Trey and Riddle

#I-made-a-mistake #opps #they’re-not-amused

Trey Clover:

High Key flips out

But on the inside cause he’s cool like that

Instead of approaching you immediately he stops and thinks

Comes to the conclusion that he doesn’t want to suffocate you and you should have the freedom to do what you want

Even if that means inhaling cancer

Gonna try not to worry about it but his momma bear instincts get the better of him

Good boyfriend logic has nothing on momma bear instincts

Besides good boyfriend instincts is fighting with good boyfriend logic already

Stress bakes

A lot

Like each dorm gets 200 cookies a lot

And thats tart number 20 and pie number 17 and cake layer 8

Everyone has no idea what's going on but free food is free food so...

Eventually you confront him

“What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong? The fact that you’re dying!”

…

“Trey, Honey. I’m not dying.”

“YES YOU ARE!”

It takes a while to calm him down

You agree to never smoke again as long as he promises to confront you when he feels somethings off

It’s all very sweet but now you have a lot of baked goods and literally nothing to do with them

You end up leaving them there with a free sign and make bets on who will die in the battle

Riddle Rosehearts:

So everyone else knows before him

They all try their hand at getting you to stop before Riddle finds out

Fortunately they do get you to stop

However

You still have all the vapes and juices

It’s all good and great right cause you’re done but lol you still have stuff

Then one day you just throw it out because naturally you don’t need it anymore

He finds them

AN: In one of my previous vape posts I mentioned a public execution right

This time it’s Riddle that loses his head (cue the pun drums)

Flips out

“EVERYONE RELOCATE YOURSELVES IN YOUR ROOMS! DO NOT LEAVE UNTIL I TELL YOU!”

Deadass Riddle did install a speaker system in Heartslaybul for dorm wide rule announcements and order

You can’t convince me otherwise

He also has a drug tester on hand

(lol my boy is prepared)

Drug tests everyone

Trey and the others realize what happened and call you in preparation

By the time he gets to you he is thoroughly confused

“I don’t understand. No one tested positive. Maybe they were selling them!”

“Riddle darling it was me…”

*SCREEEEEEEECCHHHH*

You explain what happened when he wakes up from his shock induced coma (lol)

He’s happy you stopped and thankful his friends helped you

Lets everyone out of lockdown and goes back to business

Decides he needs to properly dispose of the drugs

…

Where did they go

BONUS: Chen’ya snickers and places the extra materials with his stash. “These will do nicely around the halls of RSA”

The kids of Royal Sword Academy aren’t as pure as they seem…

(I’m sorry I had to do that lmao)

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anothers-trash-my-treasure · 3 years

Text

Stoners

Stoner Snaf <3 So this one's kinda weird, I based it around the Watch Me from fictober so if you haven't already read that, I suggest reading it first! It's also set in a post COVID world because I need something to look forward to. Disclaimer; I wrote this while very high last night and didn't really edit it so it's probably a mess.

Pairing: Merriell Shelton / Female Reader

Warnings: 18+, unprotected sex (don't do this), recreational drug use, if you squint there's some kinky undertones but nothing too crazy.

Word Count: 4.4K (i haven't written something this long is forever omf)

Tags: @edteche2 @xmxisxforxmaybe @diasimar @txmel @gloriousdarkangelsworld @paradoxicaltornado @404-not-found-xix

Enjoy and happy 4:20

Ever since the pandemic, you hadn’t been able to do crowds. Not like you used to anyways. It killed you a little bit because all the things you missed doing so much involved crowds; concerts, clubbing, festivals, travelling. Getting back into the swing of things took time. The feeling of being surrounded by people you don’t know set every one of your nerves on fire in the worst way. It felt so...

Uncomfortable.

This is probably why you didn’t last more than a half-hour at some seedy dive bar your friends had dragged you out to for the night. They begged you to go out with them, if even only for a drink or two. It had been so long since the whole group had a proper outing, it was nice to have the gang out for a night. Until some dickhead grabbed your ass and whispered some unwanted filth in your ear, his breath hot and unpleasant on your skin. After that, you were quick to grab your bag and say goodbye to your friends. You knew they were disappointed, but you could still feel the strangers breathe on your skin like it had been singed.

You welcomed the cool air of the night, feeling it immediately cool your skin. You hadn’t realized how warm it was inside but now that you were out in the open, you felt better. The burning on your neck had settled, more of an afterthought now. Your brain still felt overwhelmed, and you knew exactly how to remedy that.

Sitting down at one of the picnic table benches nearby, you began to sift through your bag when a voice rang out through the quiet streets.

“Well aren’t you a sight for sore eyes,”

You’d know that slow drawl anywhere, you’d go so far as to say it near haunted your dreams.

“Merriell Shelton,” you beam up at him as he walks closer to you, nodding at his friends to continue without him, “I haven’t seen you since-”

“That last party.” He nods, smiling at you in the way where you’re not quite sure if he’s flirting with you or if he’s just that naturally gorgeous, “when I taught ya’ how to smoke.”

An excited smile bubbles onto your face and you shake your head at him, “Oh, you’d be so proud of me. I’ve grown so much since then.”

You resume digging through your bag to find your various forms of weed paraphernalia you carry with you. The pandemic had not been kind to you, and some days it felt like the only thing keeping your head above water was your bedtime joint. It wasn’t something you were terribly proud of, but it helped your anxiety and that was good enough for you lately.

He barks out a laugh at your response and you can’t help the pride the swells up inside of you knowing that you made him laugh like that. He comes to sit on the bench, placing himself close enough that it wasn’t weird, but far away enough so that he wasn’t directly in your space.

“What, you some kinda stoner or something now?” he asks as you layout your joints and pipes. He whistles, a mix between being impressed and mocking, when you pull out your vape too, “Damn, you got a bong in there too?”

Now it’s your turn to laugh, “No, that stays at home.” you say with a wink, “So, how have you been?” you ask, starting to put everything but your joints back in your bag.

He blows out through his lips and laughs a little, running a hand through his hair, “Been better lately, that’s all that matters, I s’pose.” He watched, something like a weird form of pride in his eyes as you pull out a joint and light it carefully. You certainly can’t complain, you forgot how great it felt to have his eyes on you.

You hum knowingly, “That’s what I keep telling myself, anyway,” you hold the joint up hesitantly.

“I don’t usually share my joints anymore, but if you’ve got your shots...” you shrug, your sentence tapering off. It’s a weird world you live in now, no one quite knows what’s socially acceptable anymore.

He smirks at you, amused, taking the joint from your fingers, “I’ve got my shots alright,”

His eyes don’t leave yours as he brings it up to his lips and takes his hit. He’s not even doing anything out of the ordinary, but he looks like he’s up to no good in every way. It’s like he’s just taking you in as if comparing you to the girl he met years ago.

“You changed,” he comments on an exhale, passing it back.

You nod, laughing softly, “Turns out I get really impulsive when I’m alone,”

He scoffs, “tell me about it,” and then he’s shrugging off his hoodie to reveal a handful of new tattoos covering his skin, “Buddy of mine is an artist,”

You gasp, ‘ooo’ing at some of the more complex pieces. Without thinking your hand darts out to let your fingers drag against his forearm, following the linework of the ink. His muscle twitches beneath your fingers involuntarily and you’re reminded of how long you’ve gone without intimate touches like this. You wonder if it’s the same for him. Did he long to be touched so innocently like this too?

“They’re wonderful,” you say, pulling your hand away, still admiring from a distance.

“Yea, I like ‘em.” He shrugs, nodding at you to take the last pulls from the joint, it’s your weed after all, “You get any?”

You shook your head, “No, surprisingly enough every time I finally convinced myself to book an appointment, shops got shut down again.” You said, only kind of bitterly.

He laughs and you scowl at him, “Aw, baby, don’t be like that,” he laughs, swatting at you half-heartedly, “Look, I betcha I can get you a discount at my buddy’s shop.”

You eye him suspiciously, “I can’t tell if you’re kidding.”

He puts a hand to his chest with a lazy smirk, “On god,”

You bite your lip to suppress a smile, shaking your head lightly, “Okay fine but that just means you’ll get to see a whole lot more of me,”

His smirk turns darker, into something more playfully suggestive, “I have no problem with that,”

A silence fills the space between you as you both take each other in. You had really only hung out with him that one night and nothing had really happened. You just sat and talked really. You talked for a while. You talked so long you didn’t realize the party had ended until your friend came to get you. You exchanged numbers and then just a few weeks after, you were instructed to start isolating. You’d kept up a steady social media friendship since then, but you had missed actually talking to him. He wasn’t much of a texter. The silence only lasts a moment, but it feels thick with tension.

“You look good by the way,” he comments, leaning ever so slightly closer to you, “I meant to say that earlier but then you made me strip for ya-”

“Whoawhoawhoa!!” you sputter through a laugh, “I did not make you do anything, you did that yourself.”

He shakes his head at you, “Nah, that doesn’t sound like me.”

You're giggling at this point, “You’re ridiculous.”

He beams at you, clearly pleased with himself for the moment. It settles for a second as he looks at you, eyes softening a bit before he glances down, nudging your knee with his a bit, “I missed you,” He cringes a bit, “I know it’s weird to say but, I did.”

Your nodding before you can even think to play it even a little bit cool, “No, I get it,” you assure him, smiling softly, “I missed you too, actually.”

He hums, smiling a rare soft smile at you before changing the subject, clearly wanting to shift the attention away from his moment of vulnerability, “So why aren’t you inside?” he asks.

“Oh,” you glance back at the bar behind you, having forgotten it was even there, “I was heading out, I wasn’t really in the mood for dive bars tonight.”

He nods, “The crowds right?” you nod and he’s talking again before you can ask him how he knows that, “I get it, sometimes being so close to that many people again makes me wanna crawl out my skin.” he chuckles.

You nod, a weight lifting off your shoulders to know you’re not alone, “Exactly, it’s not something I’ve gotten used to yet.”

“Well, can I walk you home?” he offers with a smile, “I’m in no rush to head in there,”

You smile and nod, “I’d like that,”

Somehow he had ended up on your couch. You weren’t entirely sure when walking you home had turned to him being on your couch, but you certainly weren’t complaining. You were both pleasantly high, talking anything from movie theories to possible dystopian futures and alien invasions.

“Look, I’m jus’ sayin’ that if I was an alien, I wouldn’t wanna fuck a human, are you kidding?” he reasons, eyes squinted as if he’s offended and your laughing so hard you have tears in your eyes, “Nah, I’m goin’ for a much cooler species.”

He watches you as you fight back giggles at his ridiculousness, a lazy, grin settled on his face. He reaches for his jacket that’s slung across the arm of the couch, reaching into his pocket to pull out his own stash and you gasp, mocking offence.

“You had your own weed all this time and you’ve been smoking mine?”

He rolls his eyes, settling the joint between his lips and lighting it. He inhales slowly, watching the tip as it sparks to life, eyes flicking back to you as he exhales, “I was gonna share,”

He holds out the joint for you, however as soon as you go to steal it he holds it back, just out of your reach, “what’s the magic word?”

“Oh my god, are you kidding?” you ask through a laugh, straining forward further in an effort to reach it but you’re hindered from the way you’re sitting. You make grabby hands at it instead.

“Ya want it or not?” he asks, eyebrows raised expectantly. There’s a tension between the two of you, still mostly playful but turning ever the more thick as the moments pass by.

You huff, getting comfy again in your spot, keeping your hand stretched out lazily, “Please,”

As soon as the word leaves your lips you can see his eyes get darker, that infuriating smirk only stretching across his face and you’re so mad that that’s all it takes for the playfulness between you to shatter into pure sexual tension.

Without a word he hands you the joint, enjoying the way you quickly bring it into your mouth for a deep drag to calm your rising nerves. It’s infuriating, how good he looks like this. All calm and relaxed on your couch in the low living room light, curls messy and looking at you through hooded eyelids. You want him. Just his eyes on you like this has a warmth pooling in the pit of your stomach.

You try to play it cool though, taking another slow drag and enjoying the way the smoke rises up around you. His eyes zero in on your lips, watching with a peaked interest as they wrap around the filter, watching the way the smoke escapes them. Neither of you say a word for a while. Just sitting in a comfortable quiet, a forgotten Spotify playlist playing in the background as you pass the joint back and forth.

He didn’t make his move until the final few hits of it. He shifts to sit straighter on your couch, a little more proper. What left his mouth was anything but.

“C’mere,” he says lowly, cocking his head to the side and gesturing to his lap, “gotta nice seat for ya,”

You don’t hesitate to comply, your high erasing any ideas of playing hard to get. You maneuver yourself as gracefully as you can, swinging a leg over his and settling there, straddling him comfortably with his hands on your hips. Once you're settled he raises the joint to his lips, taking in the last drag, eyes glimmering in the low light of the room. He holds it for a second, one hand moves upwards to cup the back of your neck and pulls you in closer.

Your lips are so close, the tension crackling between you like electricity. He tilts his head ever so slightly, lips parting to exhale the smoke into your mouth. You inhale on impulse and your mind goes blank as your lips brush ever so slightly together. You knew people said shotgun kisses were hot, but you had never truly believed them until now.

You know you should pull away to exhale, but you can still feel his lips brushing against yours and your mind is dizzy from the weed and from him and you can’t take it anymore. You close the distance the rest of the way, kissing him slowly through your exhale, smoke slipping through your lips as he returns the motion.

You kiss him like that for a while, enjoying his hands on your waist and the feeling of his chest beneath your hands. You were quickly realizing that Merriell was his own kind of drug. You’d only had a little taste of him and yet you found yourself craving more. His fingers flex against your body and you can’t help to low noise that slips out of your throat. It only spurs him on, emitting a growling sound of his own as he tugs you closer, dragging you against his growing erection. Your hand slides into his hair in response, feeling like you’re so high on weed and him that you might just fly away.

“Is this okay?” he asks against your lips, letting his forehead press against yours while he waits for your response.

You hum your affirmative, nodding your head quickly while diving back into for another kiss, this one much more ravenous than the last. God, you felt like you were starving for him. You couldn’t get enough at the way his tongue slid against yours, the feeling of his hands gliding up and down your body. They continue down the curve on your spine, settling once they reach the globes of your ass.

“You don’t know how many times I thought ‘bout this,” he mumbles, pulling away to stare at you teasingly through hooded eyelids. His accent, already a slow drawl, comes out much thicker when he’s high like this. It washes over you like honey. He smirks at you and before you can begin to wonder what he’s up to he brings one of his hands down in a sound smack against your right ass cheek.

You gasp at the feeling, dulled by the layer of your jeans but rippling throughout your sensitive skin nonetheless. You laugh lowly against his cheek, “likewise,”

He bites his lip on a grin, capturing your lips in a single, filthy kiss as if he knows exactly what it’ll do to you. Your hands wander up under his t-shirt, nails digging in sightly, just as a preview, returning the favour.

Like a switch, he’s on you a little more urgently and things begin to move faster. His hands tug on your shirt impatiently and you obediently part to take it off, shucking your bra off as well, and feeling pleased when he follows your lead. Your hands explore each other's bodies, every inch of new skin. It’s not long before he switches positions, standing up and dropping you back on the couch so that this time you’re laying on it properly. Without wasting a moment, you wiggle your jeans off, tossing them somewhere over the coffee table and taking in the way his eyes darken further at the sight of you.

He crawls his hips between your legs, capturing your lips in a messy kiss before starting to trail them down your body. Your high has your skin feeling so sensitive, every soft brush of his lips feeling like a shock of electricity through your body. He spends time on your breasts, marking and kneading them with his hands, enjoying how responsive you are beneath his ministrations. Though he doesn’t spend long there, clearly more interested in another prize.

He settles, this time his shoulders keeping your legs spread. He presses a soft kiss to your inner thigh, lets his fingers dust over your panty-covered pussy. Your muscles twitch at the feeling, and you feel your cunt clench around nothing. He looks good there, tattoos cover his skin and you long to be able to leave something that permanent on him. Fuck, you want him so bad.

He grins at you, knowing exactly how impatient you must be feeling. And that bastard uses it to his advantage. Sucking marks into your thigh just to watch your squirm. Eventually, he pulls your panties to the side, letting his fingers slide through your folds. He whistles lowly between his teeth.

“Mmm, baby, you this wet for me already?”

The whimper that leaves your lips is pitiful, your hips twitching in an attempt to get the pressure where you need it. He chuckles under his breath, eyes darting between your heat and your face, “Look at you,” he near coos, letting his thumb trace circles around your clit, watching as your mouth drops on a silent moan, “You want it so bad, don’t cha? Sweet thing...”

“Are you gonna be an asshole like this all night?” you ask, breathless but trying to redeem some of your dignity through what little wit you have left.

He laughs, sinking a finger into your heat just to watch the pleasure ripple across your face, “Don’t pretend like you don’t love it.”

And he’s right of course. You do love it, love the way he comments on how wet you are for him, almost mocking. Love the way he’s taking his time to find the most sensitive parts of your body and using them to his advantage. You let out a breathy moan as his finger brushes your G-spot.

The sound must do something to him because within a second he's attaching his mouth to your pussy with a growl, not even bothering to remove your panties before doing so. The heat of his tongue on your clit as his finger works that sweet spot inside of you turns your breathy moan into one much louder.

He’s good with his mouth because of course, he is. Within moments you feel like you're right on edge. And the smug bastard knows it too if the amused glint in his eyes is anything to go by. Your one hand twists in his curls, encouraging his movements while your other works at your nipple.

“God,” you whine, tugging at his hair as you feel heat wind up your spine. You swear you’ve never felt this good. It only takes another flick of his tongue against your click before your orgasm rips through you, thighs attempting to squeeze around his head, stopped by his free hand holding your one leg open so he can work you through it. Your body twitches in its aftershocks, mewling pathetically when the simulation starts to ride that edge between pain and pleasure.

“It’s just Merriell, actually,” he supplies when he pulls away with a smirk.

“I fucking hate you,” you breathe out, pulling him up your body so you can kiss him again, despite your words. He laughs, moaning softly against your lips when your hand finds the bulge in his jeans.

He kisses you for a while, letting you paw at him for a bit before he pulls away to work them off his body. There’s no real rush, the high allowing you to take it slow and enjoy the moment as opposed to the frenzied fucking drinking tends to lead you to.

You whine and he laughs at you, low and cocky as he leans down for another wet kiss, “You hurtin’ that bad for it, baby?”

You beam up at him from your place on the couch, feeling comfy and sexy with the way his eyes trail across your skin, leaving a tingling feeling in their wake. You shrug, watching with interest as he rids himself of his briefs, admiring his cock as he awaits your response.

“It’s been a while,” You say, distracted as you anticipate the stretch required for your body to accommodate him, ‘I’m excited, sue me.”

His hands use your hips to drag you closer to him, lifting one leg onto his shoulder while letting the other wrap around his body. He leans down to kiss you and you only have half a second to wonder the last time your legs were stretched like this before the feeling of his cock at your entrance steals the breath from your lungs.

Your mouth drops open, a moan caught in your throat as he slowly sinks into you. Your eyes roll back, shamelessly enjoying the stretch as he sinks, inch by slow, pleasurable inch. He continues the slowness, but you’re not sure he’s doing so on purpose.

When your eyes focus again you see the definition of bliss on his face as he thrusts slowly in and out of you, moaning lowly in his throat.

“Fuck,” he says, drawing the word out through gritted teeth, “that’s it, takin’ me so good.”

His thrusts begin to pick up, still fucking you slowly but with more force behind them. Each sharp movement of his hips as the tip of his cock dragging sweetly against the deepest parts of you, and it feels so fucking good. In the moment, it’s intense. He’s folded over you, holding your leg against your chest so he can suck and bite at your neck as he fucks you. You can’t help the filthy moans you let loose in his ear, one hand fisted in his hair while the other digs your nails into the smooth skin of his back.

“Merriell,” you gasp, feeling distinctly insane with the pleasure you're feeling. Your head drops back onto the couch, body jolting with each thrust of his hips. It’s good, god, it’s so good. But the need that burns through your veins makes you impatient, “Let me ride you.”

The words are out of your mouth before you can stop them, but it’s a suggestion he is clearly open to acting upon. He quickly pulls out, sitting back in his original position and pulling you on top of him.

“Be my gu-” he doesn’t finish his sentence, instead tapering off into a moan as you waste no time in sinking down on to him again, “Christ,”

You waste no time. Quickly stabling yourself with your hands on his shoulder and maneuvering yourself up and down on his cock. Now it’s your turn to watch him. Watch him as his eyes roll back and his hands grip your hips with a vice-like grip. That smirk never strays from his face though, clearly enjoying himself.

“You look so pretty like this,” he talks, bringing a hand down on your ass again, loving the way it spurs you on, “talk to me baby, tell me how it feels.”

You moan, loud and borderline pornographic, “You feel so good,” you breathe, biting harshly down on his lip, savouring the growl that vibrates through the both of you, “Oh, fuck, Merriell, you feel so good,” You emphasize your words with a particularly good roll of your hips.

You can tell he’s getting close by the way his hips start to snap upwards to meet yours and the way his brows furrow in concentration, “Fuck, baby girl,” he groans, unaware at the way the nickname makes you melt, “tell me you’re getting close. I wanna feel you cum around my cock.”

You nod immediately, pulling on his hair so you can capture his lips harshly, letting him bite your lip and pull your hips frantically against his own, “yes,” you whimper, “yes, yes, fuck imgonnacum,” you rush out, feeling like every touch he’d ever laid on you compiling into this one moment. It’s completely overwhelming and for a moment, you blackout.

When you come to he's kissing at your neck, hands massaging and pull at your ass, helping you ride of the aftershocks of your orgasm. His sounds have turns high and desperate against your neck, hands gripping at your skin so hard you think you’ll have bruises tomorrow. He needs you to keep going. Give him something.

The small, dare you say whimpery, “Oh baby, please,” has you moving quickly, almost as desperate to make him finish as he is to finish.

In the blink of an eye, you’ve lifted yourself off of him and onto your knees in front of him, quickly enveloping his entire length into the warmth of your mouth.

“Oh fuck, baby,” He moans urgently, both hands coming to tangle in your hair as you work your mouth over his cock, eyes trained on his face, “Fuck, I can’t-”

You hum, encouraging and within seconds you feel him reach his climax. His head thrown back, hips twitch upwards into the welcoming heat of your mouth, a low long moan pulled from his throat. He lets you bring him down, continuing to suck and lick softly at his spent cock, eyes lazily following your every movement.

When he finally pulls you up off the floor it’s to kiss you, lazy and heated. You collapse basically on top of him as you kiss, unbothered by the smallness of the couch and the cold air that bites at your cooling skin. He makes a noise in his throat when you pull away, watching in amusement as his eyes barely open to look at you.

“‘M so fuckin’ high.”

It pulls a laugh from you, bubbling up from your chest. He smiles, bright, relaxed and dazzling, “Hope you weren’t plannin’ on kickin’ me out because ‘m not movin’ for a while,”.

You rest your head on his chest, letting yourself sink into the moment with him, your own high coming back to you as you bask in the post-sex haze.

“You're still gonna get me discounted tattoos though right?"

#merriell shelton #snafu shelton #stoner!snaf #merriell shelton x reader #snafu shelton x reader #snafu x reader #smut

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