#don’t hear back until 9:30 at which point I am not going to respond because I have a job and need to go to bed

[opisasodomite]

When will I be free from the tyranny of Group Projects…

[hikarus-shida]

Hook: "Apologize"

Hook x gender neutral!reader genre: fluff towards end, kind of angsty but not really warning: mentioning of arguing, some swearing - also not proofread

summary: reader and hook argue before a show. hook thinks everything is fine hours later, when it's not, so he apologizes to reader requested by: anonymous (I hope you enjoy!) Masterlist Tag List: @cutierocker202

I started this imagine about an hour ago and actually kind of liked how it turned out. The only bad part is how bad the writers block gets! I hope you all enjoyed it though.

*I do not own this gif!*

There was only an hour before Dynamite started and you spent about 20 minutes of it arguing with Hook about shit you’ve already forgotten by now. At this point, the two of you were talking just to rebuttal each other and not let the other feel right, which made two of you in the wrong. You didn’t care about that right now, all you care about was getting away from Hook and his annoying mouth.

“God Hook, you’re not winning this fight. You think you can talk, talk, talk and come out of this in the right. You’re never right and right now? You sound like an asshole. So just do me a favor and don’t talk to me for the rest of the night.” You snapped at him, having enough of hearing his voice. You walked away before he could even respond, not bothering to look back.

Luckily enough for you, there was nothing set up for you to do tonight on Dynamite. So, that means you had all the time in the world to cool down and be away from Hook. You had went to the locker rooms and put your headphones on, playing music to calm you down. Of course, a sad song had came on and you had groaned - you weren’t in the mood to be sad or think about him either.

It was a stupid argument. You and Hook argued because he didn’t like how close you were to some new indie wrestler that previously made an appearance on Dark the day before. Hook didn’t even greet you like he normally did, he acted cold and gave you an attitude, telling you “to go talk to your new partner”. You felt the way that he acted was out of line and incredibly ridiculous, but his jealousy made him think otherwise.

You didn’t realize how long you’d been in the locker room until you had checked the time on your phone, 9:30 appearing on your lock screen. It almost scared you how quick time passed you by, you’d practically missed almost all of Dynamite. You were a bit sad that Hook hadn’t reached out to you, but you pushed all that away considering you were still kind of mad at him.

Leaving the locker room, you made a beeline to catering. Sitting for almost two hours, hiding away from everyone, had made you crave a drink. You had grabbed a water and took a seat, watching the monitor to catch the last few minutes of Dynamite.

What you didn’t know is that Hook was coming up right behind you to take a seat right next to you. You felt a pair of eyes stuck on you, but ignored it until an arm wrapped around your shoulders. You turned your head to look at the person in disgust, but was sort of relieved to see it was Hook. The look of disgust, however, settled back onto your face and you removed his arm from around your shoulders.

Hook looked at you with confusion. “What’s wrong with you? You never do that.”

The fuse you had tried so hard to not let burst was going to any minute now, but you knew it would be a bad idea to explode on Hook for being such a clueless ass, especially in catering.

“Did you forget about our argument two hours ago? You know, the one you started? Why are you acting like that never happened and expecting me to be okay with you?” You tried your hardest to not lose your patience, but this was just a whole other level of ridiculousness.

“I thought we would’ve forgotten about it and everything would be fine. Don’t tell me you’re still mad.” Hook sighed, now he felt like an asshole, which he still was in this moment. He should’ve known to approach you with an apology in one hand and hugs in the other.

“Now what on earth would make you think we would be fine? Especially when you started it and never apologized. You accused me of flirting with someone. I’d never do that to you. You know that and for you to think otherwise, that hurts.” You felt tears well up in your eyes, but you refused to cry. Hook stayed silent, his expression full of guilt as his lips fell down into a frown.

He took a hold of your hands, resisting a smile that was begging to pop onto his face when you didn’t let go. “You’re right, Y/N, and you should say it. I should’ve never accused you of that. I shouldn’t have been petty either, that wasn’t smart of me or even who I am. I feel like an asshole and like a terrible person. I know you better than anyone else just like you do with me and I should’ve trusted you, I do trust you. I was being really stupid. I should’ve approached my jealousy in a healthier way and told you. I’m sorry, Y/N. I know there’s nothing I could do to not make you mad at me anymore, but I do apologize with everything in my heart.”

You could tell Hook was being genuine, but that was something you never wanted to happen again. That was your first serious argument with him and honestly, it was very frustrating. You couldn’t handle it if you were ever that upset with him again.

“I accept your apology, but that can’t happen again. I’m sorry that you were jealous Hook, however you needed to handle it differently though. I understand that it may be hard, but I can help you navigate that. Like you said, it should’ve been done healthier. I’m glad we can talk about this now without being rude to each other because this is how it’s supposed to be. And I don’t ever want to fight with you again, it sucked.” You took a look at his face, the guilt still apparent. His eyes reminding you of a child that had just got caught doing something that they didn’t mean to; sadness and nervous.

You held into his hands, your thumb rubbing over his knuckles to soothe him. “It’ll never happen again. You’re so understanding, I should’ve just said it. I’m so lucky to have you, you... Y/N, you’re just everything to me. I never wanna fight again, I can’t. I love you too much to put you through that hurt and pain.”

Hook pulled you into a hug, his hands rubbing your back as his head laid on your shoulder. You began to rub his back as well, taking in this moment. You hated being mad at him, but now that you had talked it through and he apologized, everything felt okay again. But you surely weren’t going to forget about this moment; it was a teachable one that you didn’t want to forget, incase you two ever had another issue.

[omg-im-such-a-masochist]

ILLICITUS: CHAPTER 1

Prompt: Y/N is a respectful narcotics agent, she worked hard to have her work recognized in a prominently male work field. She‘s assigned to the most important case of her whole career, investigate and apprehend the biggest drug dealer of U.S.A, the only thing she didn’t count on, was for the bastard to be so damn charming.

Word count: Long-ish

Pairing: Mob!Roman Reigns x Reader

Warnings: +18, Illegal substances, cursing (that’s all for now)

Tagging: @ziasaph , @reigns-5sos, @mindofasagittaruis , @jibbles26 . I’m also tagging these lovely humans(although they didn’t ask for it 👉👈, but they’re opinion is very important to me as well 💕) @blondekel77, @akiko-tanaka, @drew-is-boo , @drewmcintyrekoccsrocbwdgfan, @new-zealand-chic

Notes: I’ve had this idea for a few weeks now, and decided to give it a shot. This is originally planned to be a series, but we’ll see how this goes...I’ve always loved crime themed stories, so this is dedicated to my profound love for crime series. Y’all know the drill loves,sorry for misspellings,english isn’t my first language (bla bla bla),check out my other stories if you’d like to(it would make your girl here very happy 😊) and if you’re comfortable with it,please let me know what you think? Some feedback is always welcomed and appreciated ❤️You can check out my other stories typing ‘masochist writes’ on the search bar on my page and my newest story as a fixed post.Okay,now let’s get to the fun part,shall we? Hope you’ll enjoy 😉

“Argh! Already?!” I groan as I get up from my bed, shooting a deadly glare at my alarm *4:30 a.m. how fun is that?!* I thought

I took a shower to help me shake off my sleeping mode, brushed my teeth and made me some tea to start the day.

I know, weird right?! What type of officer/agent/investigator doesn’t drink coffee and smoke cigarettes?? Well the answer is: me! I love the smell of coffee but hate the taste of it, so tea works for me. But I am kind of guilty on the cigarettes though, it’s not an addiction per say, but I do smoke one or two if a case is really killing me...is a coping mechanism.

I drove the short 10 minutes distance between my home and the DEA’s office in a comfortable silence. Once I parked my car, I took the elevator to the 34th floor. As soon as the doors open I find my boss waiting for me.

“Good morning, kiddo!” Jeffrey smiles

Jeffrey is a nice guy, 57 years old, 37 years in this job, a good wife, four kids and two grandchildren. He drinks so much coffee that I’m pretty sure it has replaced his blood by now! He’s like a damn chimney, three packs of Marlboro red every fucking day! I really don’t know how he still have any lung function.

He’s always been nice to me, always supported, always believed in my work and potential and sort of took me under his wing ever since I started working here. He’s one of the best and I was glad to have him as my mentor and boss.

“Good morning, Jeff” I lightheartedly smile

“How is it going kid? Don’t you just love the fresh air of mornings?” He lightly chuckled

I rolled my eyes “Oh yeah I love it! That’s why you called me here at 4 a.m.? To talk about your profound love for mornings?” I raise my eyebrows

He laughs “Oh you’re priceless kid! But no, that’s not what I called you in here for, unfortunately. Let’s go to my office, shall we?”

Once inside his room, he motions for me to seat down.

“So?” I ask

“I have a case for you”

“But I’m already working on a case with Alvarez”

“That’s his case. This one” he passed me a folder “Is all yours! I want you to lead the investigation” He smiled

I open the folder and read the information inside, when my eyes stopped by the target’s name I froze in place.

“Sir, I...” I whispered “I can’t accept this”

“Not only you can, but you will kiddo! I need someone who will not get intimidated by him”

“And you thought of me? Of all people?” I scoffed

“Yes, you’re the only one I can actually trust in this place. Rumor has it, he knows we’re investigating...” He stares at me

“Do you think someone snitched?” I ask

“Only five people knew about this operation....people who wears big shoes, if know what I mean..”

“Superiors?” I whispered

He slowly nodded “ Well, we know how powerful he is, so him having informers is not a shock, but I didn’t thought he would have such high hierarchy ones..”

“So why do you want to hand the investigation to me, exactly?”

“Y/N, there’s a reason why I’ve always liked you kid, you love what you do, you can’t be bought, you’re not scared of anything or anyone, you have a deep passion about this career and that’s hard to see! But also because I need someone I can trust with my eyes closed, and that’s you kiddo” He squeezed my shoulder

I’ve always been an ambitious person, since I was a little girl, this operation is a one in a lifetime opportunity for me to make a name for myself in this department, so I didn’t think twice, before saying

“I’ll take it”

He smirked “That’s my kid!”

......................................................

It was now 9 a.m., I’m debating whether I should go on and get this over with or postpone ‘till later.

“Ah, fuck it” I say as I open my car door and make my way to the security gate. I ring the intercom.

“Yes?” A male voice answers

“Agent Y/L/N, DEA, I would like to speak to Mr. Reigns please”

“Do you have an appointment?”

“No, but I could use some of Mr. Reigns infinite kindness” I bitterly said

“Well, he’s not available now” The guy responds and hung up.

*Fucking great! Now I’ll have to get a warrant that will probably never be signed! That’s just what I needed* I thought as I made my way back to my car, as soon as I was about to get inside of my car I hear

“Agent Y/L/N, please, wait” The same guy who answered me on the intercom was now at the gate

“Mr. Reigns will see you, now ma’am”

I raise my eyebrows in surprise as I followed the man inside the house to Mr.Reigns office.

..................................................

“Please, sit down, Mr. Reigns will be here in a minute. I’m gonna need your gun ma’am” I give it to him “Thank you. Would you like something do drink?” He asks

“No, thank you”

After two minutes, the door opened once more.

“Agent Y/L/N, what do I give the-“ He stopped by my side, measuring me up and down, visually surprised and amused by ‘the agent’ being a woman “Pleasure” He smirked, offering me his hand for a handshake which I accepted

“I would like to have a few words with you Mr. Reigns, if that’s ok”

“Sure!” He made his way to his chair, in front of me “So what can I help you with, agent?”

“I came here to deliver this to you, sir” I pass him a document “It’s an assent term, we’re opening an investigation on you and we would like for you to cooperate with the information we need it, if you sign it, you’ll give us the consent to investigate your business and patrimony as well as provide us any further informations we might need. You’re free to keep the document and show it to your lawyer if you would like. In case you don’t want to sign it, we’ll have to start a search warrant on your name, business, property, information and data”

I say as he reads the document

“May I ask, what’s the investigation for, agent?”

“Illicit substances, sir” He already knows about the whole thing, so there’s no point lying about it.

He gives me a smug smirk “I bet it must be very hard for you, agent Y/L/N, to be taken seriously in this field. I mean, you’re a very beautiful woman, surrounded by all those old men..If I had a gorgeous coworker like yourself, I wouldn’t be able to function properly...” He vaguely says

“Would you like to keep the document, sir?” I ask, fully ignoring what he just said and pretending it didn’t affected me at all! Yes, he was breath taking and incredibly hot, but also an investigation target. And I’m a professional for crying out loud!

“Would you like to have dinner with me, agent Y/L/N?” He charmingly asks

“Mr. Reigns, I’ll ask for you to not insult my intelligence, sir.”

“That’s exactly why I’m inviting you for dinner. Because I know you’re an incredibly smart woman” He stares at me with his brown eyes full of amusement

I reach forward and yanked the document out of his hands, I needed to get out of there before I would do something completely unprofessional

“I see you’ve chose the warrant then, no problem sir”

I turned to walk out of his office, when he grabbed me by my arm, pulling me towards his chest. He leans down, brushing his nose on the nape of my neck

“You smell amazing agent Y/L/N, what perfume is that?” He brushes his nose up on my neck, until he reached my ear “I think we’ve started with the wrong foot, don’t you agent?” He stepped back and brushed his lips with mine

“What do you say, we give each other a helping hand? I sign your little document and you have dinner with me, how does that sounds to you?” He whispers

“I can still go for that warrant you know?” I bluff

He lightly chuckled “Oh baby, we both know that, that warrant will never be signed” He rested his hand on my neck, tilting my head up “So what’s gonna be? Do we have a deal?” As his fingers caresses the back of my neck

Before I could stop myself, the words slipped through my lips “Deal”

He smiles satisfied

To Be Continued...

Please let me know your thoughts on this “potential” series and if it should continue?

[songofsongs214]

“Anchor”-A Tim and Lucy Novella

Summary: When you’re about to go somewhere that is unknown, what you’re looking for is something or someone to keep you rooted in who you are. This is a bit of an AU but set before the season 3 finale before Lucy goes undercover. 

Hello everyone! SO this is my submission to the Chenfordfanficweek2021 for the “free category”. I’ve been editing and working on this piece for about 4 months now and I hope you all enjoy it. Also, I have to post it here for now, because my invitation to join Archive of Our Own got extended to July 31 😭

Warning: there are mentions of drug addiction, and there's a lot of kissing. So if either of those are triggering for you, I don’t recommend it. Let me know what you think! This is the first fanfiction I’ve written in 15 years, so I know I’m a little rusty but I’m actually pretty proud of it. Huge shout out to @farfarawaygirl for her encouragement to share and her willingness to read over this multiple times and giving me extremely helpful feedback. I hope you still like it after I changed the title 3 times 😛

Lucy Chen was vibrating with excitement. Harper had asked earlier at the beginning of her last shift if she was ready to go on her first undercover assignment. She’d been waiting and hoping it would be soon since she became a P2, but she didn’t anticipate it would be the first month of her second year. She didn’t think she had made enough of an impression yet to be trusted with this assignment.  When Harper had briefed her on the case, she had revealed that she was going under as “The Chemist” again and this time it would be for an extended operation. 

As she was driving down the boulevard, Lucy watched the road as the light from the line of streetlights would flash in and out of her car interior bathing her hands in an orange glow. Lucy remembered when she had been in the station in the room with Sargent Grey as he told her how this was going to work for her. She was instructed that she couldn’t take what belonged to her on assignment. No photos, no hair care products she had purchased with her own money. No jewelry. That last one was what she was the most apprehensive about. She looked down at the opal ring on her finger and twisted it slowly back and forth as she kept one hand on the steering wheel. 

Without these reminders she had started to wonder what was going to anchor her to herself. She wore her ring on a daily basis when she wasn’t in uniform, and it grounded her just like the day she threw it off her finger; it stabilized her when she had the ring thrown back to her from the hands that had lifted her away from her death. 

What if I can’t remember who I am when I’m under? What if I forget that I have a life outside of those circumstances? 

It had been a week since Harper’s offer and 3 days since she had been briefed by Sargent Grey. Nova. She had tried the name out on her lips earlier that day and something about it felt familiar and foreign at the same time. She had been so excited until she saw his face and just like that her excitement was tempered and she felt a sense of dread she didn’t feel before. 

Finally, she had reached her destination. She put her Nissan in park and pressed the button that shut the engine off. She was sitting outside of his house hoping to try and get an answer to a question that had been running around in her mind without fail this entire week. Tim knew she was going under the next day. He had been in the squad room when she told him. She didn’t think he should have heard it from anyone else. So why did he walk away? 

He had worn his stern face not  giving away anything except for the glimmer of surprise and anger she saw in his eyes for a brief moment. 

He’d mumbled “Good luck” and “Be safe” then he walked away without another word. 

That wasn’t good enough for her. She was not going to let him just leave her and pretend that he had no opinion when she knew for a fact he did. 

Which is what brought her to his door at this hour of night. Truth be told it was only 9 pm, but it might as well have been midnight with the amount of nerves that were coursing through her body at this moment. 

She had parked just shy of the driveway as she stepped out of the car and shut the door, pressing the button to lock all the doors without the beep of her key fob. She started walking up the path to the front door and she froze just staring at the outside door. Her palms were sweaty and she started to wring her hands out in front of her. 

Maybe I shouldn’t do this. Maybe it would be safer to just turn around and go home and prepare for a new life with a bottle of tequila instead.

Before she lost her nerve, she lifted her hand and knocked on the door. She didn’t know how long she waited there. It could have been 30 seconds; it felt like 30 minutes. Finally, she saw the light switch on in the living room and Tim opened the door. 

To say that Tim’s face was shocked was an understatement. His eyebrows had shot up with his eyes blown slightly wide open looking briefly disarmed. 

He looked insanely good for him just being home alone.

 Well I hope he was alone. 

She didn’t see any shoes lined up at the door and Tim didn’t look like he was waiting on anyone. 

Tim was wearing the same shirt she had seen him wear on her Plain Clothes Day. His blue shirt looked like he had just pulled it over his shoulder with its wrinkles. He adjusted it so it was pulled forward then his arms were crossed across his chest. 

She opened her mouth, but words failed her. 

He beat her to it and found his voice first, “Lucy?” He said carefully almost as if to test if she was a mirage. 

“What are you doing here? I thought your first day was tomorrow, shouldn’t you be prepping?” He paused and searched her face and stared her directly in the eye

 “Or did you change your mind?”

Tim looked at her with an intense gaze and for a second she could swear she was his rookie again and he was scrutinizing her every thought. Typically, one look from him would spin her out, but she wasn’t his rookie and she didn’t come all this way to fall on her face. 

Lucy looked up at him trying to remember the rehearsed words she had figured out on the car ride here. 

Her voice didn’t sound like her own when she replied, “I’m leaving tomorrow and I wanted a reminder of who I am before I go.” 

She took her eyes away from his eyes and stared ahead of her almost ready to bail all together. She took a deep breath and stood up a little straighter. 

“I needed to see you and I had a question I needed an answer to.” She finished with more boldness than she started as she took a step forward. 

Tim’s eyes narrowed then he put his arms down to his sides placing his hands in his pockets. 

“What answer are you looking for from me?” His voice was a little deeper than it was before. 

Lucy knew this was her now or never moment, she could tell him all of these reasons right here outside of his door while he was on the other side of the threshold ;where she wanted to be more than anything. Or she could show him. 

Lucy took another tentative step forward so she was almost touching his chest with her proximity. By this point Tim’s hand had come out of his pocket, but before he could say anything, she had stood up on her tip toes and reached her hand around his neck and gently pulled him down and pressed her lips to his. 

At first, neither one moved. It was almost as if they were afraid to respond. Then Lucy could feel Tim’s hands on either side of her waist pressing his finger tips in. 

Tim’s lips moved first over hers. He slid his lips in between hers and he tugged gently on her bottom lip pulling it into his mouth. She clutched at the hair on the back of his head as she pushed her head forward slightly being pulled into his proximity even more. 

At some point, Tim had pulled her inside his house and had closed the door. His hands moved from her waist to cupping her face. They stood in his living room kissing just testing the feeling out. Lucy could feel Tim’s hands move from around her face and grip the back of her head gathering her hair tresses in between his fingers. 

Briefly, Lucy slipped her shoes off at the door, so she matched his barefoot appearance. She could hear the quiet thud as the shoes hit the floor and she kicked them to the side away from them without pulling away from Tim. 

Lucy kissed him back with every feeling she didn’t know how to tell him. She teased her tongue at the seam of his mouth and silently asked for permission to enter his mouth and deepen the kiss. He obliged and opened his mouth to let her in. As she continued her ministrations, he moved one hand to the small of her back pulling her flush against his body. 

Wow he’s actually really REALLY good at this. 

Lucy’s hands moved to push Tim’s button down shirt off of his shoulders, but she couldn’t get it completely off of him. He chuckled slightly against her lips,  pulled away, and shrugged it off. He wasn’t gone for long, he pulled her to him within the tense of a breath and Tim removed her cardigan and wrapped his arms around her waist completely. 

Both of them stood with just their undershirts as they continued to test these waters they both had been too afraid to jump into. 

Suddenly, Tim stilled his hands on her hips and pulled back with his forehead resting on hers. 

“Lucy” he whispers it and his warm breath breathed across her lips. 

Lucy tries to say words but all that comes out is a whisper “Tim...that was..” 

He cut her off before she could finish.

“Unexpected?” he chuckles with a lopsided grin she could see. 

Lucy laughs quietly too. She moved her hands from his shoulders back around his neck to anchor herself because she feels like she’s going to fall over. 

“Lucy, I was on my way to see you, I didn’t like how silent I was to you. I wanted to tell you I…”

Lucy didn’t let him finish as she reached up as she pushed herself upward and kissed him instead. She took control this time as her lips glided over his. She nipped at his bottom lip which caused him to shudder and groan quietly. She let go with a small pop and she moved her lips to murmur in his ear

“I wanted to talk too, but you know right now I want to see what the show me kind of guy will do instead.”

Tim stared at her for a beat. His eyes looked down to her lips and back up her eyes. Lucy thought he had decided not to continue. Instead, he started kissing her again. Suddenly, his hands lifted her up onto his waist  holding her with his arms wrapped around her as she straddled his waist. 

He carried her down the hall and took her into what she assumed was his room. He placed her down on her feet and slowly turned her so her back was against his chest. He placed his hand on her hip bone and stroked where her shirt had risen up. Tim had used his other hand to sweep her hair off of her shoulder that exposed her neck to him. She leaned to the side slightly so he could have full access. 

Tim’s mouth feathered kisses down her neck and onto her shoulder. Lucy shivered. Then, he moved his kisses upward to the shell of her ear where he nipped and took it gently between his teeth. 

Lucy squirmed from the intensity of the feelings and pressure building up in her belly all the way down to her toes. Sensing her trying to move away from him, he moved his hand from her hipbone to splay his fingers flat across her stomach firmly, but not too tight. Lucy moaned quietly as she felt the stubble of Tim’s face against her skin. 

Tim says huskily in her ear “So, what question did you want me to answer?” 

Lucy spins herself around so she’s facing him in the dark with only the slivers of moon streaming through the blinds. 

“Remember when I said we didn’t need to talk.” 

Lucy feels Tim smile against her lips and he kisses her quickly, then he pulls away while running his hands down her upper arms. Lucy hears him speak and Tim’s voice sounds like it’s all around her. 

“But what about tomorrow?”

Lucy reached up her hands to cup his jaw. 

“Tomorrow, I’m Nova.” But tonight my name is Lucy Chen. and I just want to keep kissing you.” 

Lucy leans forward just hovering over his lips, ”Please Tim.” Her eyes look into his and glance down to his lips. 

Tim looks down at her with a look that she hasn’t had the privilege of seeing until now. His eyes wander over her face and his admiration and fear shines back at her through his blue eyes. He groans out loud as he places his hands tenderly around her face rubbing his thumbs over her cheeks. 

“I want to kiss you, I want to continue this..but you’re leaving tomorrow. And I don’t know if I’ll ever see you again.” 

Instantly, Lucy takes in his words and knows that he’s remembering back to when Isabel had said similar things to him before she walked out on her final assignment as the Isabel he knew.  She had lost herself. She had become someone else. Lucy looks down and steps away from him, but she doesn’t step away too far. 

She runs her hands over her hair trying to smooth it out from his ministrations. She catches her breath as she watches Tim look down and away from her catching his own. 

Lucy sits on the bed behind her and reaches out her hand for Tim to take. Tim wraps his fingers around hers as she tugs him down to sit next to her on the edge. Tim releases her hand and turns on the small lamp on his nightstand that adds a quiet glow to the room which illuminates his face to her. Now, she can see the tension and conflict in his eyes that’s written all over his features that the dark had hid from her before as he had run his hands down her body. 

I was too distracted. How could I have missed this? 

Lucy reached for his hands and held them in hers. He looked down at their joined hands, but he didn't look her in the eye. His jaw tenses. Lucy is thrown by the sadness she feels coming off of him where desire had been before. She lifts one of her hands from his to turn his face towards her with her hand on his cheek. She looks at him with tears shimmering lightly in her eyes that are reflecting his own. 

“Tim I’m not Isabel, I know she volunteered right out of the gate when she could. I was asked to do this assignment because they  trust me to follow protocol. I know you’re looking at me now and you see her, but Nova is an alter ego not someone I want to become.” 

Tim’s expression hardens slightly as he speaks, “Isabelle was known for her professionalism. She had hundreds of successful ops, until me day she didn’t. One minute she was bringing down drug dealers, the next she was she was the one lining their pockets.. and other things..” Tim pulled away from her and turned  his body towards the nightstand opposite of her. 

He continued, ”Some officers in her department said it was her relationship with me that caused her to be more willing to compromise. Her shrink at rehab told me that it was her feelings for me that clouded her judgement and she was already ready to consider those compromises to seem insignificant.”

Lucy had started to tear up at his words. He still held all this guilt that he was somehow responsible for her and for the choices she had made. 

He thinks he’s the reason she failed. He thinks her having feelings for him caused her to fall down into the pit of addiction. 

“Tim, remember when I told you that addiction affects the family of an addiction just as much as the addict.”

He nodded with his head down staring at the floor rubbing his hands together in front of him. 

She couldn’t bear not touching him in some way, letting her physical touch provide comfort to him about a past she hadn’t been a part of, but who she was repeating in front of him. 

Lucy moved herself closer to him on the bed so her thighs were resting against his. She felt a jolt go through her, but she was more interested in this intimacy with him more than sex. She put her arms around his shoulders holding on to him. She hoped her words could help him to see the truth and to start to let go of all the lies inside his head. 

“Tim, I care about you. You are brave, and considerate. You are calculating, but never cruel. You’re never cruel. You didn’t cause Isabelle to succumb to addiction. You are incredible, but you are not that powerful. She was her own person before she met you and even though you were married she was always the one responsible for herself. She took that needle in her hands. She injected it. These were her choices. It’s not your fault what happened.” 

By this point Tim had stiffened and his shoulders slumped forward as he started to shake a little under her hands. There were tears falling down his cheeks.

Lucy reached up and wiped some away leaning her head against the side of his face holding  him. 

“It wasn’t your fault. Going undercover wasn’t the cause of her losing herself, it gave her the opportunity to fall into a hole she had already felt before. Addicts aren’t just created overnight. There are thoughts ahead of time, there are many factors. But hey remember she’s clean now. She has her life; she lived. And you know why? A big reason is because you didn’t give up on her. You helped her.”

Tim cleared his throat and wiped his tears away. He turned to her finally so she could see his eyes. 

“Okay. But Lucy what happens if you’re put in the same position as she was? What if it’s a matter of life and death? How do I know you’re not going to wash out with no one there to bring you back.”

Lucy spoke quietly, “I’m not Isabelle Tim. I’m a different woman and our relationship is different.” 

“Seems pretty damn similar,” he says bitterly. “Except I’m compromising your career now. How can I call myself a training officer again.”

Wow he is so self deprecating. Now he’s trying to push me away. I must have seen him too cleary. 

Lucy speaks up, “I am the cop I am because YOU trained me. Your training has saved my life countless times. To be honest, I never expected to have feelings for my training officer.  And to be fair, I didn’t actually feel the depth of my feelings for you until after I became a p2. I’m not here because you took advantage of me. I’m with you right now because I want to be. I will NEVER regret knowing you. You didn’t do anything wrong. You’re not going to ruin me.”

Tim lifts his head and looks into her eyes. She sees that they’re slightly puffy from his burst of emotion and reaches forward to kiss his forehead.

Lucy follows quickly. “Okay your turn Bradford because I’d say that was a pretty great declaration of feelings here. I’m not sure you could follow that up.”

Tim laughs softly before he speaks. 

“Lucy you were my rookie and I hadn’t thought about you and I together like this. But I remember when you were taken and I chalked up my reaction to guilt and responsibility but the truth is I was terrified that I would never be able to see or talk to you again. Then, when you confessed feelings for me on our last shift, it felt like the world had dropped out below me. I was confronted with what I knew but was unable to acknowledge. Lucy, that terrified feeling I felt when you were buried is how I feel right now knowing you’ll be gone and in danger.” 

Lucy nodded her head and tried to contain the tears that were gathering in her eyes. The weight of Tim’s vulnerability and the reality that she is gone tomorrow suddenly hits her like a punch to the gut. 

At that moment, she reached out and placed his hand around her waist and she tucked herself into his side placing her head against his chest. 

Tim took the hint and pulled her closer to him wrapping his arm tightly around her and rested his head on hers. 

“I’ll be okay. I’m going to come home.”

His hands start to draw circles along her side under her shirt. 

“You can’t promise that, but I appreciate you trying. I’ve been in this position and I want you but If I’m being honest I don’t know if I can do this again.” 

Lucy’s stomach drops with the falling of his words. She turns them over analyzing every syllable. After she lets his words wash over her,  She starts to disentangle herself from leaning into his body and she clenches her teeth to prevent the tears from finally gushing out. 

“Well I should go..”

Before she can complete her task or her words, Tim pulls her onto his lap instead and wraps his arms around the small of her back burying his head in her neck. 

As he embraces her, she no longer stops the tears from falling as they run down her cheeks onto his shoulder. She almost misses it, but she hears Tim’s broken answer “Don’t”.

She’s sobbing before she can stop it. 

He holds her tighter to him as he starts to rub his hands up and down her back. It’s like all of her realizations and Tim’s trauma cascades over both of them as they hold on to each other holding on to this moment for dear life not sure how long it will last; if it will last. 

Tim’s voice is muffled in her ear as he continues to hold onto her. 

“Listen, I can’t change my past or erase the triggers I’m feeling right now. I can’t ignore them but I want to see where this can go. I want to find out what you and I can be. I can’t let you go. I know I shouldn’t, but I want you.”

She lifts her head from his shoulders to see the heat and determination in his eyes. She doesn’t think, she pushes forward and kisses him. 

Tim kisses her back and his hands move from her back and down to her upper thighs with his fingers digging into her pants. She starts to reach for the hem at the bottom of his shirt until she feels him pull away with his forehead resting on hers. 

He’s breathing heavily and his voice is low and strained, “I want you Luce. God knows I want this with you. But I just can’t be with you right before you leave. But when you come back, Tim Bradford finishes what he starts, you know that better than anyone.”

Lucy pulls away to look at him fully in the light. Tim reaches his hand up to brush the hair off of her face and behind her ear. 

“I would like to see it, and If anything this will give me something to look forward to. Hey, your feelings for me are not a liability. They’re an asset. Knowing you’re out there believing in me will encourage me to be the cop I need to be. I’ll remember who I am”.

Tim holds her face with both of his hands and he places his forehead against hers then he whispers to her that makes her heart beat even faster than before if that were possible. 

“If you need someone to remind you that you’re Lucy Chen, let me remind you. You are Lucy, the woman who arrested someone on her first day as a police officer. The woman whose compassion has saved more lives next to me than our guns have. The woman who I will not be able to stop thinking about for the next month. The woman who I am insanely attracted to. The woman who is doing the most meaningful thing with her life and many others are better for it including mine. And I’m so proud of you.”

Lucy stifles another sob. “Wow for someone’s that’s a show you type of guy you sure know how to say it too” 

Tim leans forward and speaks dangerously low with his hot breath hovering over her lips. 

“ Well stick around, I’m full of surprises.” 

Lucy laughs and wipes her eyes. She goes to get off of him ready to go home, but his arms stop her. 

“Wait, I meant it. I don’t want you to go. Will you stay with me tonight? I just want to feel you in my arms where you’re safe. Please?”

He looks at her with a hesitation and a shyness she hadn’t seen from him since she made his first audio book and she encouraged him to not be ashamed. 

Lucy kisses Tim chastely on the lips and holds onto his hair. 

“Okay, I think I can stay. Although I never imagined Tim Bradford would be begging me to stay. I think I like the sound of that” 

Tim smiles against her lips. “Don’t get used to it” as he falls against his pillows and takes her down with him. He spoons her with her back to his chest. He curls one arm around her waist and one arm around her shoulders as he kisses the side of her head. 

She snuggles up close to him pulling the covers over both of them as her eyes start to drift close. She falls asleep to Tim’s voice in her ear telling her how much he’ll miss her and for her to come back home to him.

She started her night worried she was going to forget who she was. And she ended her night wrapped in the arms of the man who has always known exactly who she was. She holds onto him who's always been her anchor. Suddenly, undercover work didn’t look as appealing as it did before, but as her eyes drift shut she realizes she can do this because she knows where she can go back home to.

[halcyonstorm]

The Girl at the Library Chapter 1

Short Fic - Levihan

Themes: College AU, Library, Fluff, Slow Burn, Falling in Love, Female Hange Zoe, Student!Levi

Word Count: 5730

Chapter: 1/3

Warning: Mild Language

Read on Ao3 - The Girl at the Library

Summary: Levi is a college student who needs help on his research paper. Luckily, Hange is a book worm and works at the library. 

Levi was stressed and annoyed, mainly because he was in college. Of course with college comes infinite amounts of homework assignments, 100-question exams with astronomical amounts of topics on them, unnecessary research papers, and staying in a dorm room with a kid that happens to have no problem inviting his friends over every night to hang out and party with no regards to his sullen roommate.

Levi had a paper coming up. He had to come up with a topic, find sources, and finish his paper by the end of the semester. With three weeks left to go, he decided he’d rather get it over with. He began his brainstorming in the study lounge at the center of his dormitory floor. He was starting to stress. He sat on the big yellow leather couch in the way-too-bright study lounge with his laptop in his lap. He tapped his pen against his head as he tried to think of an idea. 

“You have to write about a topic related to your major,” The professor explained. “This is the one and only paper you will have assigned this semester. I suggest you get it done as early as possible.”

If only it were that easy. He had the rubric pulled up in one tab, and a ton of “How to pick a research topic” websites in others. His major was pharmaceuticals, a field he was inspired to take on because of his mother. She was very ill when he was very young, so they were in and out of hospitals. He was sitting on the edge of his mother’s hospital bed when a nurse came in the room to administer her medications. 

“This is…” His memory was blurry. “This medication will help… and make you feel better.” And it did. 9 year old Levi was fascinated. This one little pill or bag of what looked like water helped his mother feel better. Within hours, his mother’s skin went from pallor to beige. Her hands were warmer. She looked more awake, more alive. She didn’t wince at Levi’s touch. She was in less pain. She got better, like the nurse predicted.

Since then, Levi always asked questions whenever they visited the hospitals again and again. “What kind of drug is that?” “What does it do?” “How long does it take to take effect?”

Levi recalled the memory with a deep sigh. He missed his mother. She was at home, not too far away. Levi never had the time to travel the hour through the big city to visit her. When he did have free time, he spent it studying or sleeping. He felt his heart twinge at this. She had sacrificed everything to help him attend college and to give him a good life.

Now with his head cloudy, he went to reach his water bottle in his backpack. He opened the lid and took a sip. At that moment, he could hear some obnoxiously loud students throwing tennis balls back and forth to each other. He recognized these kids too, they were some (of many) of the lovely visitors his roommate had over most nights. Suddenly in the blink of an eye, Levi’s water bottle spilled all over his laptop, a tennis ball on the floor next to him, and some worried voices approaching him. Within seconds, the laptop started to steam and the screen went black.

His laptop was fried, he determined. He felt heat start to rise inside of him. 

“Oh my god, man. I am so sorry,” One of the kids said, trying to hold back a laugh. 

“Yeah, man. We didn’t mean to.”

Levi took a deep breath and stood up. These kids… were gonna pay.

He closed his broken laptop and stood up. These kids were much taller than him, but looked to be easily intimidated by Levi’s presence. 

“Do you have the money to pay for this?” He sneered, getting very close to their faces. 

“Eh… no, but we have jobs! We can pay you back over time,” One of the kids trailed off. They seemed to be intimidated by the short man. “You live in 112 right?”

Levi nodded, his face heating up with anger. “This laptop cost me a lot of money.”

“We get it, man! We said we’re sorry,” the other kid explained. “We’ll pay you back or whatever.”

“Tch,” Levi clicked. He was extremely pissed. These kids should not be throwing balls at each other in the hallway. Also, they spilled his water which made a mess. “Which room are you both in?” They responded with 118. The one kid explained they get paid on the 15th and 30th of each month. Luckily, their pay day was 4 days away.

“I’ll stop by Tuesday, the 16th,” Levi decided, before gathering his things and heading to the stairs. He began to walk through the campus. Fuck, now where was he gonna go? How was he gonna find his topics? His computer was fucked. Putting it in rice wouldn’t have helped. He was so occupied having a debate with himself about where to research, he almost missed it. If he looked the other way or even blinked in that moment, he wouldn’t have seen it. It was the campus library. No, not the campus library, but a campus library. It blended into the surroundings, hidden from the passerbyers. There was a sign in the window “We’re Open!”. 

The library was small, to say the least. It was old fashioned, which contrasted the modern aesthetic of the university. It was a small, dark brown, wooden building with four-pane windows. The door was a lighter shade of brown. He decided it was easier to check out this little library instead of walking another 10 minutes to get to the main library. He didn’t have time to waste. He had to get started with his paper right away. He walked up to the door and opened it. When he did, a little bell rang at the doorway. 

“Just a minute!” A woman’s voice called from the back. Levi decided to wander around. There were many books crammed on the shelves. There were two computers on each side when he walked in. They looked out of place, considering they were very modern compared to the architecture of the library itself. The books were all shades of bright, vibrant colors. It was strange. From the outside, it seemed creepy and gloomy. Once he walked in, it was very cozy. The dark walls of the library contrasted the beautiful colors of the books.

Then, he saw the woman come out. She came up to the desk. He expected an elderly lady with her glasses on a chain, but he assumed this woman was a student. She was a young woman who wore thin oval glasses and her brown hair thrown up in a messy half-up-half-down ponytail. 

“Hi!” The woman said. “How can I help you?”

“I want to use a computer, please,” He announced. He glanced at her nametag which hung like a necklace around her neck. “Hange” was the name on the tag. It was strange and unordinary, but it had a nice ring to it. The name seemed to suit her.

“Sure! You are allowed up to two hours a day,” Hange explains. “You can choose whichever computer you’d like.”

The computers were unoccupied. In fact, the entire library seemed vacant except for him and the employee. 

“Does anyone actually come here?” Levi asked, setting his stuff down next to a desk, and looking her way. She looked like someone who would work at a library. 

The brunette chuckled. “You are my third visitor today!” She exclaimed proudly. It was already about 3pm. He remembered the sign in the front says “12pm-6pm weekdays”. 

Levi chuckled silently, air huffed out his nose. “How do you stay in business?”

“Well, the university thinks it’s good to have a small library in the outskirts of the campus so students have access to books and computers because the main campus library is in the center of the plaza. Sometimes we get about ten people a day, and sometimes they don’t even take anything out. Sometimes I wonder how…” She began to ramble now. She definitely has not had anyone else visit her today.

She was starting to get on his nerves. It’s been 20 minutes since he arrived, and she was still talking. He zoned out until she caught his attention.

“Hey,” She said. “What’s your name? I have to track whoever comes in to use the computers.” 

Why? No one else comes in. He noticed her clipboard with the sign-ins was blank.

“Levi Ackerman,” He announced. She scribbled his name down. “Okay, it’s 3:30 now, so you have till 5:30 if needed.” She pointed to the clock with her pen as she explained. He nodded and proceeded to walk towards the table with the computer he claimed. He sat down and began working.

-

He was an hour into his research when he finally threw his hands up in the air in frustration. He still couldn’t think of a topic. He groaned aloud.

Hange was leaning against the main desk, her nose stuck in a book. “How Trees Communicate” was the title. When she heard the young man groan, she looked up. 

“Is everything okay?” She asked, peering over her book at him.

“Yeah, yeah,” He mumbled. “Fine…”

Hange raised an eyebrow. She placed her bookmark at her spot, then strolled around the desk and walked over to him.

“What are you working on?” She asked, sitting in the seat next to him and put her hands on her knees, looking at him curiously. He scoffs. It was none of her business, he thought to himself. And it’s an invasion of privacy.

He was frustrated and desperate. Hoping for a miracle, he managed to tell her anyways.

 “I need a topic for my paper and I can’t think of any…” Levi began. “It needs to be based on pharmaceuticals, my major. It also needs scientific evidence to back up my research…”

She was fully absorbed in what he had to say. She was bored, so helping Levi would’ve been something to do at least. Besides, Levi was in luck. She was an avid reader, always reading about anything and everything. She was studying plants and botanicals, but she found herself frequently taking out books about cooking; religion; war; animals; and medical topics including surgery, pathophysiology, anatomy, and pharmaceuticals.

“What about how diuretics affect blood pressure?” Hange suggested. Levi was taken aback. His eyebrows furrowed, and he shook his head in confusion. “Or if anti-alzheimer drugs actually help slow the progression of Alzheimer’s? Why do you take different medications during certain stages of Alzheimer’s disease? Or how do anti-seizure medications work? That is something I ask myself all the time. You take this little pill and BOOM! You’ll be fine, no seizure! Oh, oh, oh! Or, how certain medications cause certain adverse effects? How come so many medications cause anxiety?” Her eyes started to light up as she talked. They were a dark brown, but when she started to talk, they seemed to morph to a captivating hazel. He felt he could see every color in her eyes. He saw brown and green and the little lines of her iris. Hange’s hands would move as she talked, and her smile grew wide. She couldn’t keep still. She was getting excited by coming up with all these ideas. She seemed so passionate and so willing to help; he was overwhelmed by her.

Levi was in shock. His day started off horrible. Now, he was almost glad his laptop was fucked. This woman was making his mind race with ideas. 

“Are you okay?” Hange asked for the second time within his visit there. Levi nodded slowly. “I am just… How do you know all that? Are you a med student?”

Hange chuckled and waved her hand at him. “No… I am a bookworm! Also, my mom is a nurse, so she used to teach me about nursing stuff all the time. Oh! You could write about the pathophysiology of anticholinergics! Or beta blockers! Or how the body reacts to the use of long-term steroids?”

Levi took a deep breath. He felt euphoric. He had been casually trying to think of topics since last week. All of a sudden, this woman can just ramble off hundreds of ideas? Levi smiled visibly.

“Actually… I really like the final topic you suggested. About steroids.” Levi admitted.

Hange smiled back at him. “Great! I can try to help you find some sources or books.” She directed him to open a new tab and to go to a certain database. “This is where you can find reliable sources. Over here,” She pointed to his screen at the left side. “You can add filters. You can change how old or new you’d like the sources to be, filter out certain words or phrases, et cetera.” She had been closer to him now; she scooted her chair closer so she could explain the database to him. It was hard not to look at her as she explained. She was captivating.

Levi began to type in words for his topic.

“Steroids”, “Long-term use”, “Cushing’s Disease”, “Addison’s Disease”, “Addisonian Crisis”, “Pathophysiology”.

He felt like he was finally getting somewhere. He was finally making progress.

-

As Levi was walking home, he couldn’t get his mind off that girl. He decided to brainstorm about his topic in his room once he got there. The thing was, though, he couldn’t think of any more ideas. He found it funny. Of course he was full of ideas and inspiration when he visited that library, but now he’s void of any.

-

Levi’s weekends were no different than the weekdays. He made it appoint to visit the library again the next day, Saturday. It was a sunny, cool Saturday morning. Levi had inspiration to write. He needed a computer and Hange’s ideas. When he arrived, it seemed busy. There were three other patrons at the library.  He recognized Hange right away, helping a tall blonde man with a big nose. He wondered if she was the only employee there. The man she was helping was taller than her, so she had to reach up on her toes to point to items. She was an average height, but this action made her seem shorter than she actually was.

Hange looked his way and greeted him with a toothy smile. Levi waved at her and started to head down one of the aisles of books. He was in the nonfiction section, but was lost. For now, he just casually browsed the section, but quickly got impatient. He needed Hange’s help to find books for this paper. He heard her laugh with the patron. Maybe he’s a friend, he thought to himself. Her laugh was airy and full of heart. It seemed genuine and passionate. Levi felt an urge to make her laugh, too.

She finally made her way over to him. Levi was looking down at a book when she caught his eye. “Hey, stranger!” She greeted him with a wave. “Whatcha looking for?” She placed her hands on her hips.

“I’m trying to find some sources for my paper. Steroids is the topic,” Levi explained.

“Oh, right. I remember! After you left last night, I tried to look for some books for your topic,” She said. She was trying to help me? Levi thought to himself.

She curled her finger in a “follow me” gesture and he did. She brought him to another aisle or two over from where they were. “These are the 600’s, where you’ll most likely find what you’re looking for. I found a book or two about Addison’s disease, but it’s more of a memoir. You can look around though if you’d like. Anything in the 610’s should be right up your alley.” She explained as if she was going to leave, but she didn’t. Hange looked for books with him. 

After a moment, she made a noise. “Look at this!” She exclaimed. She reached next to him to reach for a book. She was on her toes again. “Mmmm,” She moaned as she tried to reach. “Actually, I’m gonna get the step stool. I don’t think I can reach it.” Quickly, she left and came back with the stool. It looked unreliable, but Levi was sure he’d be able to prevent any accident from occurring. Hange placed it on the ground and stepped up on it, grabbing the book with ease. She stepped down with the book in her hand. This book had a white cover with a blue label and was titled “Coping with Prednisone”. Levi was surprised she even knew what prednisone was. 

“Here!” She reached it out for him to grab. He took it and looked at her face. She had that same look in her eyes. “Did you want to use the computer?” He nodded and she led him towards the front of the library. The library was small from the outside, but very deep inside. It reminded him of a forest. 

“I got your name, don’t worry,” She said, clicking her pen and writing his name down on the sheet. 

“Oops!” Hange made a quick grimace. “I added an ‘e’ at the end. I’ll just cross it out.” The statement sounded like it was addressed to herself rather than to anyone else. She crossed out the extra letter.

“Ackermane”. Levi was gonna attempt to make her laugh.

“If you thought I looked like a horse you could’ve just said so.” 

Mane, horse mane. Get it?

It felt like forever before Hange responded. She looked up at him, starting to laugh. It was a short but audible laugh. Her head nodded back and she smiled. Her cheeks turned pink and her eyes lit up for a moment. It made his heart skip a beat. It was a bad joke yet she still laughed. She chuckled. Giggled? No. Laughed lightly. Chortled? Maybe that’s the right word. Whatever it was, he wanted to do it more, maybe even more than that.

He followed her to the computers. The blonde guy she was helping earlier was on one computer. She led him to the two computers across from the other ones and sat down in the chair next to him.

“What are you doing?” Levi asked, placing the book she found for him on the table.

Her eyebrows raised, and after a moment she reacted. She waved her hands in front of her.

“I’m sorry! I thought you may have needed help. I should get back to work anyway. I gotta go through a new box of books that just came in.”

Levi looked up at her. Is she blushing? he asked himself.

“I’ll let you know if I need help.” Levi responded. She smiled at him before quickly walking away.

-

He started to find some evidence-based practice articles about how steroids can cause long-term side effects, especially if stopped abruptly. He made sure to keep the tabs available. He’d have to cite them later. Levi’s mind was racing with words and sentences and ideas. He had to get them down on paper. He opened Documents on the computer and started typing away.

The clicking of the keyboard soothed him. He was a pretty fast typer, he didn’t make many mistakes either. The library around him began to become quiet as his typing got louder and he got deeper in thought. Before he knew it, his two hours were up. He felt someone approach him from his right.

“Hey,” Hange said, gently tapping the table next to him. “It’s 2pm. I gotta close up.”

Levi snapped out of his focused trance with a quick head shake. “Right. Sorry.” He pulled out a flash drive from his backpack and plugged it into the computer. He transferred his document. “I got the first page done.”

Levi asked himself for a brief moment why he was sharing this information with someone he just met. Maybe since she helped him, he felt she should know.

“That’s great! It seemed like you were really focused,” Hange said, walking away to shut off some lights. Only then did he notice the white noise of the overhead lights quickly dissipate. The room buzzed with silence now. Levi and Hange were alone in the library. Suddenly, Levi felt nervous. He watched Hange walk around the room frantically, making sure to shut off all the lights and computers. She grabbed a bag. The bag was a fabric material with a patchwork design that had a long strap that hung on on her shoulder. Maybe she made it herself. She grabbed her big mess of keys and walked towards him.

“Ready?” She said. He nodded and walked outside, holding the door for her. She thanked him, locking the door behind her. They began to walk down the street slowly. 

“Want to grab lunch?” Hange asked, looking at him. Levi looked back at her. She looked pretty.

“Sure, I can eat.” Hange chuckled at that. He didn’t try, but it made her happy for a brief moment. He seemed nervous but she was too.

They decided to eat at a cute restaurant on campus called “Life in Paradis”. It was a small, dainty place with a green and yellow checkered awning. The building was made of yellow brick, and the door was bright green. There were flower pots outside on the windowsill. Again, this place seemed totally out of place in the modern aesthetic of the university. 

“This place is adorable!” Hange exclaimed. “I love the food here. You’ll love it too. They have all kinds of food here.” Levi felt a smile grow on his face. The way she talked made his heart flutter. She was always so passionate. They entered and got a table for two. This is not a date, Levi kept telling himself. Then why were his cheeks red?

They sat down and looked through a menu. Levi wasn’t extremely hungry even though he hadn’t had anything but tea this morning. He peered over his menu to look at the girl. Her hair was different today, he determined. Today all her hair was in a ponytail, and it was higher on her head. She wore a light yellow button-down with a long, light blue cardigan. Hange caught him staring at her and blushed.

“What would you two like to order?” The waitress asked him first.

“I’m gonna get a sandwich, I think,” He said, crossing his arms across his chest. “Turkey sub.” “I think I’m gonna get a chicken caesar salad,” Hange said. He nodded, grabbed the menus, and walked away.

Hange began to talk about how beautiful the flowers outside the restaurant were. They were all variants of pink, purple, yellow, and red. She described the petals and the leaves, the flowers’ origins, and all the meanings of the flowers. Levi wasn’t annoyed by her tangent this time. He actively listened to this girl talk about what fascinated her so much. He found it soothing. It made him wonder how her brain can contain all the information she was spewing at him. He enjoyed watching the way her eyes lit up when she talked. The beautiful green that blossomed at the bottom of her irises when the light hit her eyes at the right angle. The way her lips curled into a big smile when she talked to him. Her cheeks flush to a light pink when she describes the petals of the flowers or how flowers were used to express feelings when words cannot. It made his heart race. 

“Levi,” Hange said. Her affect was the opposite of earlier when she was rambling. She wore a frown on her face, feeling guilty.“I’ve been rambling… sorry. It’s such a bad habit of mine. I can talk for hours and hours.”

“Don’t apologize, four-eyes,” Levi replied, leaning his elbows and forearms on the table in a crossed position. Hange smiled at him. Levi meant it. She shouldn’t apologize for talking, especially if it’s about something she loves. The food had arrived at the table. They ate. Levi felt the need to open up to her about something. He already learned so much about her, and her presence made him feel like he can open up. 

“I like to run,” Levi said abruptly. Hange looked at him intently, chewing on a forkful of salad. “I don’t do it competitively or anything, but I enjoy running. I try to run once or twice a day.” Hange’s eyebrows raised and she nodded in agreement.

“That’s awesome!” She smiled again at him. “I like to run too. I’m really slow and get tired easily, but I enjoy feeling the wind in my hair and feeling my heart pound.” She took a bite of her meal again. Levi nodded and began to eat too. This sandwich was really good.

-

After talking some more about hobbies and school, they both finished their meal. The waiter brought over the check. Hange reached into her pocket for her wallet.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Levi asked. Hange furrowed her brows.

“I invited you out to lunch. I will pay,” Hange determined, her wallet now in her hands.

“No,” Levi said too quickly. “I will pay. It’s the least I can do. You helped me with my paper after all.”

The bickering lasted a very long minute. Before she got to think of the idea, Levi grabbed the checkbook and shoved his card inside before handing it to the waiter. Hange looked surprised. She sighed, putting her wallet away.

“Thank you, Levi. But you really didn’t have to.”

“I wanted to.”

In all honesty, Hange didn’t have much money. She worked at that library four times a week, but the money she made went towards paying off her tuition. She really wanted to treat this man, her new friend. She wasn’t sure if he thought the same way about her. Did he consider her his friend? She felt slightly embarrassed. She did most of the talking and felt like she was annoying him. Maybe he just wanted to pay so she would lay off. 

But the truth is, Levi felt the opposite way of how she was thinking. He was interested to hear more from her. He was addicted to the way his heart raced when he saw her. 

-

Over the next couple of days, Levi would go to that library whenever he was available. He knew it was closed on Sunday, so he went Monday and Tuesday to the library. Fortunately, he got his first batch of money from the brats that fried his computer. He received $100. Of course it was not enough, but it was a start. Wednesday the 17th came around. This specific day was a wild card. The weather was unpredictable. Levi entered the library just in time; it had started to downpour. The little bell rang as he entered the library. To his surprise, Hange was not working that day. There was a boy behind the counter who was tall and had a brown bowl cut hairstyle.  He almost thought about turning around and leaving when he realized she wasn’t there. The rain charged towards the earth viciously, so he decided to seek shelter in the small library. It almost looked like a hurricane. He felt his mood change into a bad one. He didn’t remember to ask how often she worked. 

“Hi there!” The man said. His name tag read “Moblit”. That’s a dumb name.

“I wanna use a computer,” Levi muttered, walking up to the main desk.

“Okay. Name?” Moblit grabbed the clipboard and a pen.

“Levi Ackerman.”

“Oh, I see you’ve been here before. A lot, actually.” Levi scoffed and rolled his eyes at his comment. He turned around, picked a computer, and sat down. He felt really stupid to not ask her about her schedule.

The two hours he spent working on his paper was incredibly slow. He didn’t get much done that day. He had writer’s block. He was almost done, so he didn’t worry about it too much. He didn’t know Hange’s schedule. He knew she worked Friday, the day they met; Saturday; Monday, and Tuesday. Maybe she only worked four times a week? Before he knew it, he asked Moblit aloud. It was almost an accident.

“Uh, she’ll be in on Friday,” Moblit replied. He probably couldn’t give out that information to some creep who began visiting daily with an attitude. He muttered a “thanks” before finishing up and heading out. The weather was holding up for now, so he decided to make a run for it. He didn’t say goodbye to Moblit.

He didn’t have an umbrella. The sun was trying to shine through the dark, eerie clouds. It wasn’t trying hard enough. He heard thunder rumbling in the distance.

Levi realized that this girl was all he thought about the past few days. Something about her enticed him. Something about her eyes and her presence drew him towards her. His heart skipped a beat whenever she’d graze his hand on accident, or even when she just talked to him. She made him happy. He hadn’t had too many friends in college. Although they just met last week, he felt a deep connection with her. 

Suddenly, the sun poked through the clouds for a brief moment. The world lit up. It was at that moment he recognized a familiar face. Hange. She was walking towards him. She grinned when she saw him. She wore a fitted black t-shirt and baggy, light blue jeans. 

“Levi!” She exclaimed. “I forgot my jacket in the library, so I came down to get it.” 

“You didn’t tell me you weren’t working today.” Is all Levi said. Once he said it, he realized how creepy it must’ve sounded. A man she just met happens to go to this library to work on his project every day, who happens to come up with multiple reasons to interact with her. Maybe she thought he was a perv.

“Ehh!” She sighed. “I’m sorry! I thought I told you I was off today.” Levi shook his head. The comment itself may have sounded rude, but it wasn’t. She genuinely felt bad. “Walk with me.” Levi followed. Guess not.

“I don’t work Wednesday’s and Thursday’s. Well I’m not supposed to be,” Hange explained. “Mobilt, one of my co-workers, is always calling out sick. So I basically run the place.” They walked towards the library again and entered. 

“Hey, Moblit. How’s it going?” Hange said in a normal tone, heading towards the back of the library. Moblit responded briefly, following Hange. Levi decided to hang back, he figured it was a secure area. He looked around awkwardly.

“Hange, you didn’t tell me you had a boyfriend,” Moblit said, following her towards the back. 

Hange chuckled nervously. “He’s not my boyfriend,” she said bluntly. “He’s just a friend.” Moblit scoffed, rolling his eyes. “If he’s not your boyfriend, how come his mood entirely changed once he saw you?”

Hange found her jacket, folding it over her forearm. “Huh?”

“He was, like, in a bad mood when he came in. He used the computer but he seemed to be pissed or something. Now that he’s with you, he seems… tolerable.”

Hange laughed, feeling her cheeks blush. “It’s nothing like that. People have bad days, you know.”

Hange rolled her eyes and smirked, then headed towards the front of the library. “Ready?” Levi nodded and turned around.

“See you Friday,” Moblit called out. “See ya.” Hange replied.

The two started walking down the street. The air smelt of rain, and the ground was wet from the rain earlier. “Which building is your dorm in?” Hange asked. He was a bit surprised she asked him that, and she was so direct about it.

“Saint Maria,” He replied. She smiled. “Me too! I can’t believe I haven’t seen you around!” The wind picked up and the sky turned darker than before. They both looked up. “If you can’t make it to the library, you can use my desktop in my dorm room,” Hange offered. Levi’s cheeks turned bright red. 

“Thanks, maybe tomorrow I can stop by,” Levi said. It was more of him thinking aloud than a statement. It was too late though, Hange already heard him. He could’ve sworn he didn’t say it aloud.

“That’s fine! I only have a class early tomorrow morning. Come by around 11, okay? My room number is 506.” Levi nodded. Thunder rolled and sounded closer now. They were almost at the dormitory building when it started to downpour. The rain was forcefully coming down on the two. Levi groaned in annoyance. He hated being in the rain. He hated being wet; he hated the wet socks and how gross he felt when it rained. He would’ve started to run to the building to seek cover, but he was taken aback by his new friend.

She was soaked and embracing it. She lifted her head up to face the sky and she laughed. It was loud, happy, genuine, and it took Levi’s breath away. Hange reached her hands out wide and spun around. He saw a strike of lightning light up the sky. He stared at her in awe. His heart swelled. Levi smiled big. After laughing, Hange looked at Levi and shared the look that he wore just a few moments ago. She loved his smile. She wished to make him smile more. She was also determined to make him laugh, too.

She grabbed his hand. “Let’s take cover!” And she pulled him into the dormitory hall. Saint Maria’s hall was beautiful. It had ceiling-to-floor glass pane windows that were always crystal clear. There was a big black modern chandelier that hung from the ceiling. It contained visible light bulbs. Hange secretly loved it. There were the same big, yellow, leather couches in the living room as there were in the study area on his floor. They both wiped their feet off on the big rug in the entryway. 

“I love the rain,” Hange deduced, turning her head to look at him. As if Levi couldn’t tell. Her hand was still holding his. Levi looked up at her. “I like it, too.”

[aka-ashi-keiji]

“i can’t hear you”

Bakugou Katsuki x best friend reader

soft angst

tw: screaming, emotional meltdown.

short fic about bakugou and you’re his childhood best friend, and you help him through dealing with his hearing loss. enjoy lovies.

*******************************************************

You woke up to the sound of your mother knocking on your door and yelling, “y/n wake up, you have training today with katsuki. i love that boy but i am not in the mood to deal with his explosive attitude over you being late .” You lived right next door to katsuki all your life and since your moms were best friends, you guys were best friends since you learned how to walk. Every saturday you guys would train from 8 AM to noon in his garage since it was basically a mini gym, and then after you both would head over to your house. You checked the time on your phone on the bedside table and it read 7:50. “SHIT MOM WHY DIDN’T YOU WAKE ME UP SOONER” you yelled as you jumped out of bed and quickly found a black tank top and grey sweatpants to train in. You could hear your mom chuckling as she walked away from your door. You grabbed your headphones, phone, water bottle, and Nike’s before yelling a goodbye and dashing over to Katsuki’s front yard. 

You knocked on his door four times so that his family knew it was you. You were halfway through slipping your shoes on when Mitsuki answered. She yawned and pulled you into a side hug. “Good morning y/n, you hungry?” She asked as she closed the door behind you guys and started towards the kitchen. “No thanks Mitsuki, I don’t like to train on a full stomach. My mom is making a huge lunch though, you guys are welcome to join us.” You said cheerfully, but kept your voice low since it was very early and you could tell Katsuki’s mom was still half asleep. She nodded and then whipped her head to face you wearing a look on her face as if she had just remembered something very important. “Kat has been very on edge lately and not very responsive this week.” She paused before starting again and turned her gaze to the floor, almost as if she didn’t want to talk. “I think it might have to do with his hearing. He won’t admit it, but I think his quirk is finally starting to affect him. Good thing we put him in those sign language classes as a precaution.” she laughed dryly and then turned back to look at you. “Just, take it easy him with the teasing today okay? and maybe try speaking a little louder. I’ll go see if he’s ready” and with that she gathered herself up the stairs and disappeared. 

You thought silently as you waited, and all of a sudden it made sense. Lately at school bakugou has been yelling more than usual, and telling everyone to speak louder. Maybe he was yelling more to be able to hear himself? You didn’t know. Bakugou has been learning sign language since he was 7 years old as a precaution for this and has been regularly signing while he talks since he was 10. So, bakugou using his sign language all the time wasn’t uncommon, but maybe Mitsuki was right. You made a mental note not to say anything until you actually noticed a big change in your guys’ training. You waited patiently for about another 10 minutes before Katsuki finally came downstairs. 

“Hey idiot, nice outfit.” Katsuki greeted you in his groggy morning voice, his hands signing his words lazily. You looked down at the tank top and sweatpants you were wearing and looked back to him, you both were wearing the same exact thing. “Morning pom pom” you greeted back as you gathered your things and started to head towards the garage. You turned around to see bakugou staring into nothing, so you called out. “Hey kat, you coming?” No response. You repeated yourself, but this time loud enough you were sure you woke his dad. He whipped his head towards you and nodded before following along. As you were walking down the hall, you turned to him and asked, “You okay?” while signing your words. Katsuki looked down at your hands and his cheeks started to dust with the lightest shade of pink. He huffed and his red eyes sparked as he just growled out a ‘yeah’ and walked ahead of you into the garage, starting to set up for your session. You yourself had picked up sign language at a young age because your dad was deaf because his quirk was being able to shoot sonic booms from his hands. you pressed the button to open the garage door and let some light in. You then walked over to the speakers and plugged your phone in as you hit play on your playlist specifically for training days. Bakugou stopped setting up the bench press station and yelled, “Can you turn it up? “ as he signed quickly, but then went back to putting the weights together. You turned back to the speaker only to be surprised since the volume was already almost at max capacity. You shook your head and turned the volume all the way up. This session should be interesting. 

It was around 9:30 AM at this point and you and Kat had finished weights and went on a 2 mile run. You were currently sitting on the floor stretching your quads as the loud techno music boomed around you. You glanced over at katsuki who was stretching on the other side of the garage and he seemed to be in a whole other universe. You called out to him, but he didn’t do so much as flinch. You picked yourself up off the floor and slowly walked towards him. You called a few more times and still got nothing from him, so you decided to turn off the music. As soon as you did Katsuki’s head shot up and his eyes darted towards you. “What the hell was that for dipshit? We’re gonna start sparring soon, we need it.” He said/yelled at you while you sauntered over to him and took a seat about a foot away from his now steaming body. You wiped the sweat from your forehead with the back of your arm before talking to katsuki, well you didn’t exactly talk with your voice, you were mostly signing. “Katsuki are you sure you’re okay? You’re not responding when I call out for you.” You waited for his response as his eyes stayed on your hands that were once moving. This time he answered, but for some reason he didn’t sign. “If I tell you, you can’t tell a single soul you hear me dumbass? Not even my parents. “ You nodded your head and gently reach over to squeeze his hand four times, your guys’ way of saying I promise. He then began to talk, and signed very aggressively as he did so, and what he said was enough to shatter you into a million pieces. 

 “I’ve been struggling in a way lately,” he started, “I tried to cover it up by just yelling all the time hoping people would just think it was my normal behavior. But, really it was so i could he hear myself.” Katsuki let out a long breath and you could see his hands slightly shaking. “It started out last week as just a slight ringing, but it got louder every damn day. But, this week the ringing got quieter, and eventually everything around me started to sound like I was underwater. “ He looked up at you and your breath hitched, tears rolled down katsuki’s face as he held eye contact. He shook out his hands and took another shakey breath before he began, “I- I can barely hear you y/n! And its so frusturating.” the volume of his voice was rising, and you could see the pain he was feeling through his eyes and the tears that were now dripping down to his shirt. “I can’t hear your fucking voice damnit! It’s the only one that doesn’t drive me up fucking walls.  it terrifies me!” He was screaming at this point as his hands worked through the air to express his words. The tears came at a much quicker pace once he had stopped to breathe, and those tear turned into sobs as he curled in on himself. He tucked his knees to his chest and ducked his head into his arms as they wrapped around his legs. His shoulders and back shook as he cried, and for a moment you didn’t know what to do. You haven’t seen Katsuki cry since you both were 8 years old and he was playing with his quirk and accidently blasted your arm. He started crying as soon as he heard you wail in pain, and the lecture from his mother didn’t help in the slightest. You subconsciously reached up to rest your hand on the scar as you tried to think of what you could say to him.

 Katsuki leveled his head and looked up at you, and slowly reached his hand out, still crying quietly. For a second you didn’t know what he meant, but it soon clicked in your head and you took his hand in yours. you looked at him with teary eyes and signed, “How can i help?” He untucked his legs from his chest and moved closer to you. Then, before you could even register what was happening, Katsuki had his arms around your waist with his head on your shoulder. You froze, it had been quite some time since either of you had needed a hug like this. once your shock had subsided, you brought your hands to rest on his upper back and rubbed soothingly. He began to cry again, which then led to sobs just like they had before. You began to talk, whispering variations of ‘I’m here’ and ‘You don’t have to be scared’, only to remember that he probably can’t hear you. Seeing katsuki as vulnerable as this broke your heart, and single tear fell from your face. Katsuki could feel your jaw muscles moving against the side of his face, so he knew you were talking, but he couldn’t hear you. “I- i- i- I can’t hear! I can’t hear you! Y/n I can’t hear you, fix it please, please I hate this so much!” He screamed into your shoulder which luckily muffled it enough to not draw any attention from the neighbors. He gripped onto your waist tighter as he breathed long and hard breaths. “I’m so scared. I’m terrified of losing you.” He whispered. This had confused you so you gently placed your hands on his shoulders and put a bit of distance between you guys so he could see you signing. “What do you mean you’re gonna lose me? I’m not going anywhere.” You said and waited for his response. He brought his trembling hands up to start signing and began, “I’m scared that if i can’t hear you, I won’t hear you calling me for help when you’re in danger. What kind of hero am I if i can’t even save my best friend?” You took one of his hands in yours and began to sign with your other. “You’re gonna be okay, We’re both gonna get you through this. I know you, and you don’t take shit from no one. And I know damn well you’re not gonna let a little hearing loss get in the way of beating deku.” He laughed slightly at the last statement, and seeing his small smile was like the world coming off of your shoulders. “We’ll take you to the doctor, they’ll help you.” He shook his head at that and his angry glowering returned. “It’s not anything to be embarrassed about. And I’m sure your parents would do anything to help you become the hero you want to be.” You finished your monologue and squeezed his hand four times, promising him you’re not going anywhere. He smiled down at his hand and then brought his other one up to sign, “I love you shithead” and you signed back, “Yeah I know, I love you too Kat”.

 He began to stand up and Katsuki pulled you up with him.  He immediately pulled you into the tightest bear hug possible. No one knew, but Katsuki was the biggest hugger, and it was your favorite thing about him. You released your arms from his waist and he released his hold around your shoulders. You took the sides on his face in your hands, and pointed to your lips as a signal to read your words. He nodded his head, and in a volume Katsuki couldn’t hear, you said, “I can hear you, I can hear you.”. He nodded and smiled the most genuine smile you’d seen out of him in years. “You ready?” he signed, and you answered “for what?”. He smirked and was quiet for a few seconds before shoving you to the side a little and running off towards your house. “Race you!” he yelled, “First one there, is your mom’s favorite you loser.” Kat called again. You smiled and shook your head as you sprinted off after him, remembering this is the Katsuki that will be the #1 hero someday. 

***************************************🌸

[ikleesfiction]

Will you follow through if I fall for you?

Fandom : One Chicago Word count : 3,485 words Disclaimer

Previously on this fic : Part 1 🞂 Part 2 🞂 Part 3 🞂 Part 4 🞂 Part 5 🞂 Part 6 🞂 Part 7 🞂 Part 8 🞂 Part 9 🞂 Part 10

Part 11 (FIN)

Jay hangs out at Molly's after a good day at work. The bar is packed with familiar faces from Firehouse 51 and The Med. He sits down at a table with Hailey and Adam, talking about dull things, enjoying his drink.

"Jay, did you ever find out who sent you that box of chocolate on your birthday last month?" Hailey curiously asks him.

"Oh, you mean the one that you and Kim confiscated?" Jay teases her.

"Yeah, yeah, you wouldn't even open it if we didn't force you," Hailey rolls her eyes. "So, did you know who gave it to you?"

Jay's lips twitch with a barely-there smile, "Yeah, I did,"

"Who was it?" Adam asks nosily.

"A friend," Jay replies vaguely.

"You have friends other than us?" Hailey mocks him. "I'm shocked!"

"Hey, I'll have you know, I am a social butterfly. I got friends in many places," Jay points his finger at his coworkers who are busy laughing at him.

Adam sobers up from the laugh first and sees Kelly Severide approaching their table, "Hey, man!"

Kelly grins at Adam and Hailey, "Hey, guys!" before beckons to Jay, "Can I talk to you for a moment?"

Jay is confused but follows Kelly anyway to a quieter corner of the bar. He waits until Kelly starts to speak. "I'm not sure if you know this, but Y/N will be in town next week," Jay stiffens as he hears his ex's name, but Kelly continues as if he didn't see it. "I know that she made a big mistake, and you probably still hate her," Kelly opens his hands in a placating manner, ".. but I'm not trying to play sides here. It's just.. she asked me to give you this," Kelly pulls an envelope from his jacket pocket. "It's two tickets for their show at Soldier Field next week, including the backstage passes. You can do whatever you want with them, man. If you want to use them, she'll be thrilled. If you want to burn them, she'll understand," He hands the envelope to Jay, who hesitantly takes it. "She's scheduled to arrive on Friday night and supposedly stays at The Langham for the weekend. But she hinted that she will try to crash at my place," Kelly informs him further.

"Why are you telling me this? What do you expect me to do?" bemuses Jay.

"I'm not telling you to do anything. I understand that you have a hard time these past months. But I also know it was not easy for Y/N as well. This might be a chance for you to clear any niggling questions you have." Kelly pats Jay's shoulder before walks out of Molly's.

Jay slowly steps back to their table. Hailey immediately grills him, "What was that about?"

Jay shakes his head to answer his friend, "It's nothing important." He puts the envelope in his back pocket, trying to forget the conversation.

◢◤

The days sneak up on Jay. Without him knowing, it's already Saturday evening. He sits on a couch at home, staring at the envelope on the table, thinking about what he should do. He knows what he wants to do, but he is not sure if it's the right thing to do. Jay bounces his foot restlessly before he decides to call Will.

"Hey, what are you doing tonight?" Jay asks Will straight away once the call is connected.

Unbothered by Jay's rude manner, Will replies shortly, "Watching Netflix. Why?"

"I need you to go someplace with me," demands Jay.

"I'm on stand by. I cannot go too long or too far away from Med." Will explains.

"I'll drive you with sirens on if they call you. Please, Will?"

Will is never immune to his brother's pleadings, so naturally, he agrees. "Okay, then. When are you going to pick me up?"

"I'm leaving my place now. You go get ready," Jay grabs his keys and walks out to his car.

◢◤

Once Will sits comfortably in Jay's car, he begins to ask, "So, where are we going?"

"Soldier Field." he hears Jay's clipped reply. Will starts to put the pieces together when he remembers that alex&y/n playing there tonight. He tries to reconfirm his guess, "Isn't that where..."

"Yep," Jay curtly nods without leaving his gaze from the road.

Will raises his eyebrows, "So you're going to see her?"

"I don't know," Jay shrugs his reply.

Will confronts him further, "Is that why you brought me? To help you decide?"

"No, I asked you to come because I know you're a fan of Y/N and her music," Jay patiently explains his reason.

Will never admits that fact before, but his brother seems to catch it anyway. Jay always tenses up whenever someone mentions his ex's name. Thus Will thought it's wiser to leave him be. But this time, it's Jay who chose to bring it out.

"But I told you before, I won't go to see the show," Will tries to remind Jay. He wants Jay to understand that he is here for his brother.

Instead, Jay tells him, "I know. That's why I brought you."

Will sighs loudly, "You're so confusing."

Stopping at an intersection, Jay grins widely at Will, "Just enjoy it, man."

◢◤

The first time Jay opens the envelope is in front of an usher who stands by the entrance gate. He shows the tickets to him and lets the usher guides them to the Guest Check-In area.

"Where did you get those tickets? Did Y/N give you that?" Will asks Jay as they stand in front of the check-in booth. Jay simply ignores Will's interrogations.

"Hello, good evening. May I see your tickets and ID, please?" greets the young man behind the booth. Jay silently gives the tickets and his driving license to the man. He checks them for a moment then input something on a laptop in front of him. Soon he returns Jay's ID back along with two gold wristbands. "Here's your wristband. Please tighten it on your hand, so you don't lose it," He pulls out a colorful map and circles several spots as he details further, "You can access the Guest Area here, on the east side of VIP seats. To access the backstage, you need to go to the north side area and ask the officials there for the backstage entrance. Is there anything else I can do for you, Sir?"

"No, thank you." Jay folds the map and puts it in his back pocket.

The man smiles politely and bids them goodbye, "Have a good time, Mr. Halstead."

The sky looks clear, tints in beautiful orange as the sun just set. They quickly find the Guest Area and the VIP seats. The seats are on an elevated section, which definitely gets a better view of the stage. The stage is dark now, but Jay can see it's bustling with some preparation. The Guest Area looks inviting. It has a private bar and a few food stalls. "This is very nice," remarks Will as he takes in his surrounding. He almost sounds impressed until he remembers from whom Jay got the tickets. "Nope. I ain't falling for this stunt! Does she think these extravagant things could lead her back to you?" Will shakes his head and declares passionately. He sulks on his way to find a spot with the perfect view of the stage.

Smirking at Will's antic, Jay pacifies his brother, "I think she just wants us to have a good time,"

Before Will can respond, the stage suddenly lit up. Laser and neon lights shine blindingly. In front of the stage, the crowd starts to clap and yell excitedly. As the intro begins to play, Jay looks down at the sea of people below him, shouting Alex's and your name.

"What's up, Chicagooooooo!" Alex cheers as he shows up on the stage, then soon followed by you. The crowd goes even wilder. You and Alex open with the first song, jumping lightly to the beat. Between a gap to the second song, Alex greets the crowd. "Chicago! It's so good to be here tonight" He leaves the beat playing in the background. "It is even better to have my best friend here with me. Would you please make some noise for Y/N!" The crowd hoots loudly. You answer them with a grin and a quick wave. "I hope you're also having the best time with your friends. Or maybe even make new friends. So now, let's party!!" Alex puts the microphone down and begins to play the next song. You and Alex play together for about 30 minutes before Alex leaves the stage. You keep the crowds going with your songs and remixes.

"Is it just me, or she doesn't look like she's enjoying it?" Will yells at Jay's ear. The music is so loud, it's practically impossible to speak over the thumping beats and sing-along crowd. Jay also notices the same thing Will said. It was really subtle. The crowd probably won't see it. But since Jay solely pays his attention to you, he can see that you're looking a bit tired. After another 30 minutes passed, Alex comes back on stage as you go off.

Alex plays solo for about 45 minutes before you come back to the stage. They play together again for a few songs until Alex grabs the microphone, "This is our last ten minutes... We are alex&y/n. We hope you enjoyed our music tonight... You guys are fucking amazing! We love you!" The crowds shout back in response.

When they reach the outro, Alex helps you get up on the table before getting himself up. Both of you bow and send air kisses goodbye to the crowds. The confetti bursts on the stage as fireworks explode beautifully to the sky. Soon as the last note goes, Alex jumps down from the table and helps you down. The stage then goes completely dark again. The crowds start to break. Some move away slowly from the stage. Others decide to sit in front of the stage and wait for the next act.

Will nudges Jay and asks, "You're gonna use that backstage pass?"

"No. Let's just go home," Jay sounds certain, but his eyes don't leave the dark stage, as if he still can see you there.

"They are actually amazing," Will comments about the show as Jay drives him back to his place. "I mean, I know they sound good. But the show was apparently better. Thank you for taking me tonight, bro."

"You know you can talk to her, right? You don't have to avoid her for me," Jay tells his brother.

Will clasps his hand on Jay's shoulder. "I know. But you're my brother. She hurts you. I'm not ready to forgive her yet."

◢◤

After you get off the stage, it doesn't take long for the entourage to leave the venue. Alex is whining that he's hungry. The time just passed 11 PM, so you take them to one of your favorite late-night eateries in Chicago. You also pick this place because it's only three blocks from Kelly's home. Thus, once everyone is done eating, they drop you off at Kelly's before they go back to the hotel.

Kelly knows that you're coming, so he's not surprised when he hears knocks on his door at 1 AM. But you are the one who is surprised when you see some folks from Firehouse 51 there. You hang out with them, talking and laughing until almost dawn. Some of them decide to go home. Others prefer to catch a wink before leaving. The sleeping arrangement becomes a challenge when there are more people than available beds. You finally get to shut your eyes on Kelly's couch just as the sun rises.

The persistent knocks on the door wake you up from your slumber. Half asleep, you come to the door, expecting Sylvie or Joe coming with brunch since they chose to go home last night.

When the door is opened, you blink a few times, not trusting your eyes. Is that really.. "Jay?" you whisper cautiously, wondering if you're still dreaming.

"Hi, Y/N," Jay lets out a nervous smile. You stare at each other for a while, uncertain of what to say. Before Jay gestures to the door, "May I come in?"

"Uhm, yeah, sure. Please. Come in," You stammer as you open the door wider to let Jay in. When you remember that you're still in your sleepwear of a tank top and cotton shorts, you insecurely put on a sweatshirt from your duffel near the couch.

You see Jay looking around the living room. It isn't messy, but it isn't exactly pristine either. They did bare minimum clean-up before went to bed, but you still can see remnants of the get-together. "Did you sleep there?" Jay refers to the unmade couch.

You let out a small giggle as you walk to the kitchen to make coffees, "Drew a short stick on the sleeping arrangement,"

Jay laughs at you, "Why did you sleep on a couch when you have a heavenly bed at the Langham?"

You're a bit surprised that Jay knew where you should've stayed, "Huh, guess Kelly told you that?" The question feels a bit rhetorical, so you don't expect Jay to give any response. "Would you like a cup?" You offer Jay, gesturing to the brewing coffee when he follows you to the kitchen.

"Please," Jay nods then sits on the chair by the counter. Both of you stay silent as you prepare the coffee. You wonder why Jay is here, but you are afraid to ask. When the coffee's brewed, you fix Jay's cup first and hand it to him before filling yours. "Thanks," Jay says as he accepts the cup. You stay on the other side of the counter as you sip into your cup. You feel like saying something, but you don't know what. Should you ask what's Jay doing here? Would Jay accept if you apologize to him again?

After a few awkward seconds, Jay speaks first. "Your show last night was great. Even got Will to jump and dance,"

That actually surprises you, "You came?"

"Of course we did. Will is a fan of yours." He says like it's a fact. Like it's the only reason he came.

You scoff your disagreement, "Right, I doubt that Will is a fan of me,"

"Will likes your music." Jay differs.

"Now that is something I can believe. But I'm pretty sure Will still hates me," you chuckle despairingly.

Jay takes his time to counter your claim, "Will doesn't hate you. He just... felt like he should. Because of me."

"What about you?" you hesitantly ask. "I understand if you're still mad at me. I just wish I can do something to fix it.."

When Jay gives no answer, you kick yourself in your head, thinking you've really screwed this up.

"When are you leaving?" Jay asks instead after a minute pause. You can hear the imply "again" at the end of the question.

Softly sigh to your coffee cup, you reply, "Monday morning." You see Jay nodding as a sign that he hears you, but he doesn't say anything. "I... might come back here in about three months?" It was intended as information, but your apprehensive voice made it sound like you're asking for his permission instead of letting him know.

Jay tilts his head, looking a bit curious, "For work?"

You take a deep breath before saying, "For you." Your gaze doesn't waver from his face. "If you can somehow forgive me and give me a second chance?" Jay locks eyes on you. His lips stay closed, but his eyes demand more explanation.

"I... realized that what I feel about you is a real deal. These past 8 months, I've been running away, trying to distract myself from my regret. I went back to Amsterdam, thinking I was gonna go home, but instead, it felt like I was walking away from home..."

"But you got your family, friends there. Your job is there. That's the reason you gave me when you left." Jay points out. He doesn't raise his voice, but you hear his upset loudly.

"Yes, they are. But I was too blind to see that I got similar things here as well. That I also have family and friends here.. Amsterdam doesn't feel the same anymore, with the fact that I left my heart here..."

Jay looks doubtful over your words. "I don't understand why you want to do that. How about your work? You're just growing a new career, and I know it's doing very well,"

"No, I don't think I can do it any longer. I hate being on stage. I got these next three months to finish alex&y/n gigs, then I stop touring. Go back to writing and producing behind the stage, which I still love to do. I could do that from anywhere. Might need to travel once in a while, but I believe I can base here."

Jay stays quiet for a moment. You feel your heart beating fast, waiting for his next words, which turn out to be another question. "If I say no, are you not gonna come and stay?"

Your face was crestfallen, your throat felt dry. Thoughts ran around in the back of your mind. If you stay here, you'd be closer to Jay. But if he doesn't want to forgive you, would staying still be better than being far away from him? "I... probably still come back and stay in Chicago." you finally answer him.

A ringing phone interrupts the heartfelt conversation before Jay gives you any response. He picks up his phone without stepping away from you. "Yeah? Okay. Give me 15 minutes." He says to whomever on the phone. Once the call ends, Jay stands up from his seat, "I gotta go."

"Work?" You pry.

"No. It's Hailey. She asks me to go with her for lunch," Jay explains.

"Oh.." Now you really look pathetic. Jealous for someone dear to Jay? Yeah, you certainly are a mess now.

You follow Jay, who already moves to the front door. As he opens the door to let himself out, Jay pauses to look at you. "It's good to see you, Y/N." He sounds so sincere.

You smile softly at him, "Yeah, Jay. It's good to see you too."

◢◤

"So you went to see her? Why?" Hailey exclaims. She cannot comprehend the reason Jay still wanted to meet his ex.

Jay shrugs. "I just... I don't know. I thought if I talked to her, then I would be able to let go and move on."

"And? Could you now?" Hailey confronts him.

"No. It made me miss her more." Jay admits.

Hailey scorns her friend's confession. "You're not even trying to move on, Jay."

"Maybe. I don't know if I want to though," Jay looks out to the street through the cafe's window.

"She's going to leave again. Break your heart again. Is that what you want?" Hailey tries to make Jay sees the real possibility here.

Jay doesn't give her any response. Without Hailey's reminder, he already thought and feared about the same things.

◢◤

"I have to state that this is an absolute misconduct." Hailey declares furiously from the passenger seat. "And I'm still thinking that you're making a wrong choice here."

It's Monday morning. Hailey should've been suspicious when Jay handed her a cup of coffee and a bag of pastry from her favorite bakery. Now they are gunning down to the charter terminal at Chicago Midway as if they're chasing a perp who tries to escape the country. Jay glances at Hailey and smirks, "Your complaint has been received and noted."

Jay turns his focus back on the road. He has been informed where the plane is gonna be. When he finds it, Jay sees you and your team walk to a G5 that's being prepared for their flight.

Jay brakes his car harshly. The loud screeching sound makes you pause and look at the source of the noise. Jay jumps out of the car and approaches you. He sees the surprised look on your face when you realize that he's here. You slowly walk towards Jay, gaping at him but utter no words.

"There months, you say?" Jay asks you with a heavy breath.

You answer wordlessly with a nod, not getting where Jay's going with this.

"I could wait for three months. Or more. As long as you come back to me." Jay tells you seriously.

"Yeah?" You stutter, eyes wide in surprise. "You sure?"

"Never been surer about anything else in my life," Jay states confidently. He sees your face beams, then it turns into a wide grin. Before he knows it, he has you in his arms, squealing happily.

-end-

+x Taglist +x

@shipshipshipau @itsdesiree86 @thevelvetseries @annaallicce

Author Notes : I plan to continue this story with one shots or drabbles, but I don't know when. Please drop me a message/reply if you wanna be tagged for future fics. You are definitely welcome to follow the account. Or you can just wait for them to appear on "Jay Halstead x reader" tag posts. Thank you for all the loves you gave this fic!

[sarahpaulsonsoftie]

You’re my equal

Wilhelmina Venable X reader

You are Ms. Venable’s assistant. Months of crushing on her and trying to get close. One night she calls you asking for you help but when you get to her house, you are glad you did.

*

You rushed into her office with coffee, which was burning your hand by the way you are holding it. You placed it onto her desk and organised a few of her paper when you looked up and noticed her walking in, she was walking tensely. She looked hurt but you decided that you maybe were only overanalysing her. Working months with someone who you had a crush on made you do that

“Good morning, Ms. Venable.” You greeted, pulling her chair out and stepping back slightly. You watched her roll her eyes in distain before taking a seat and you noticed the slight tightening of her lips.

“Good morning, Ms. Y/L/N.” She responded and looked up at you, “What is it?” She asked and you shook your head.

“Nothing… Well, I mean, I hope I am not speaking out of turn, Ms. Venable, but you seem as you are in pain. Is there anything I can do?” You asked, concerned and you knew you had said the wrong thing because when her jaw tightened, she stared at you viciously.

“The only pain I am feeling is the migraine your presence brings me. So, you would do well to leave before I fire you.” Ms. Venable said and you nodded slightly, trying to figure out how to help her.

*

You had taken your lunch break to run to a pharmacy, making sure to grab a hot water bottle, some painkillers and an orthopaedic back pillow. You paid, the total coming to 37. 58 and you smiled at the cashier as she bagged it up.

When you had gotten back to your workplace, you ran to heat up the hot water bottle, leaving the rest of your supplies at your desk. You had also decided to grab your boss a cup of coffee and a glass of water.

You watched and waited until she had left the office before rushing in. Wilhelmina Venable would not take to kindly if she had thought you were pitying her. You were not but you were concerned, and you had be damned if you were not going to take care of the woman you had been falling in love with.

You placed the Coffee, water and painkillers next to each other on the desk as well as fixing the pillow onto her desk chair. You looked at the desk again, unsure of where to place the hot water bottle before deciding just to place it on her desk too.

You grabbed some paper, writing a note, ‘Meeting on the 25th!’ Just to let her know it was you.

You left her office and took a seat at your desk, watching as Ms. Venable entered again. You could see the shocked expression her face and watched her face ease as she sat down. She took 2 painkillers and positioned the hot water bottle against her upper back.

Her eyes met you after she had read the note and she nodded, a tight smile on her lips. You nodded back before looking down at your work, occasionally looking up to check on her. You noticed after 30 minutes, she began relaxing a lot more and you were glad your boss was in less pain. She may never be your girlfriend, but at least she knows you care.

*

When you woke in the middle of Friday night, preparing for your two-day weekend break, to a call from Wilhelmina, you knew something was wrong. You picked it up and sat up.

“Ms. Venable, a-are you okay, it’s 9:30pm?” You asked sleepily, before rubbing your eyes. You heard her shaky breath.

“I need your help at my house—Please, Y/N. I can’t get up.”  You heard the emotion in her voice and knew it must have been bad if your boss was calling you now. You jumped out of bed, grabbing your keys and some money before speaking.

“I’m on my way. I’m on my way.” You muttered before Wilhelmina had ended the call. You were panicked as you tied your shoes. You ran out to your car, speeding in the direction of Wilhelmina’s house.

-

When you had opened the door to Wilhelmina’s house, you shut the door and turned on a light.

“Ms. Venable?” You called, looking from room to room. You heard her call your name from upstairs and you ran up into the room you heard your name. The door was now wide open, and you saw Wilhelmina on her shower floor, her arms wrapped around her knee. You saw her phone and realised she must have always taken it to showers with her. You grabbed a towel before opening the shower door, covering your eyes with one hand and feeling around with the other and placing the towel over her shoulder.

You heard her shuffle, “Is it on you okay?” You asked and Wilhelmina responded with a quiet yes. You opened you eyes and saw the resigned look on her face. You placed you hand under her armpits and helped her up, once she was upright, you wrapped your arms around her and began walking out.

“Where to, Ms. Venable?” You asked, softly bur loud enough for her to hear. She pointed to a room.

“There.” She muttered and you could hear the humiliation in her voice. You rubbed her lower back slightly, walking over to her bedroom and opened the door. Her clothes and underwear were laying on the bed and you sat her down, kneeling in front of her.

“Can I dress you?” You asked, she looked away from you before nodding. You gently moved her wet fiery red hair out of her face. You wanted nothing more than to place a tender kiss on her forehead or to cuddle her and let her know you were there for her. But you were her assistant and she was your boss.

You grabbed her panties before putting her feet through gently before pulling them up, the towel hiding everything. You stood as you pulled them up fully and your head fell between her shoulder and head. Once you had pulled her underwear up properly, you placed your hand gently on her shoulders looking in her eyes.

“What are you thinking?” You asked, softly. Her eyes flickered away quickly before looking back in your eyes.

“You shouldn’t have to see me like this.” She stated, tears brimming her eyes. She looked down, avoiding your gaze. “Like a cripple. People don’t look at me the same after this.”

“Hey, now, everyone needs help sometimes. I mean, just last week I had to ask for help for something that’s really embarrassing.” You responded. Her eyes met yours.

“Really?” She asked and you nodded. “W-what was it?”

Her curiosity and need to be distracted made you sit beside on the bed, your left hand resting on her lower back again, her eyes locked with yours.

“It’s embarrassing but because it’s you, I’ll indulge. Last week, my car broke down and I had to take the train to work. But I was wearing a backpack and faced away from the door. The door squashed my bag and wet all the papers I had for you.” You confided, watching as she smiled. Before realisation hit her face.

“That’s when you said you had dropped them in a puddle? I knew that it did not make sense. It hadn’t rained.” You saw her smile grow and you oh so desperately wanted to lean in. You smiled in return.

“I’m never taking the train again, out of fear the know who I am.” You laughed. You both laughed for a moment before looking at her. “Can I finish getting you ready?”

Wilhelmina grew quiet for a moment before nodding. You got up from the bed and stood in front of her. You watched as she anxiously began to unwind her towel. You picked up her top and closed your eyes just before her towel was open. You felt for her shoulders and her hands grabbed yours.

“Open your eyes please, Y/N.” You kept them shut and moved your hands away.  

“Ms. Venable, I—” You were cut off by her.

“Call me Wilhelmina.” She said and you nodded slightly.

“Wilhelmina, I don’t want to cross too many boundaries. You’re vulnerable right now and you’re still my boss.” You responded and her hands left yours and you moved yours away.

“I see.” She said tensely. You were about to speak when you heard her shuffling. You assumed she had put her towel back on and opened your eyes. She looked up at you with a clenched jaw. “Well, I didn’t realise you only came her because I’m your boss.”

“What—No- No. Wilhelmina, I’m here because I care about you not because you’re my boss. But I don’t want anything to happen that you regret.” You stumbled for an explanation, but Wilhelmina’s expression did not ease up.

“And what, pray tell, would I regret? You seeing my back?” She looked hurt and you sat beside her, trying to place your hand on her lower back again but as soon as you did, her hand grabbed yours and pushed it away.

“You really think I care about seeing your back? Me seeing your back will not change how I feel about you, is that what you think? If anything, it will only strength how I feel about you because you’re such a strong and powerful woman especially for someone who—” She cut you off again

“Has a disability?” She supplied with a tight-lipped expression. You shook your head.

“Stop cutting me off, Wilhelmina. I was going to say, someone who has been told that they cannot do it, cannot make it. But look at where you are now. You are HR at a multi-million-dollar robotics company! I do not think of you as some lesser being. I think of you as my equal, maybe even my superior because you are so smart, beautiful, powerful. I did not close my eyes because of your back. I closed them because you’re naked without that towel.” You muttered; Wilhelmina eyed you trying to see if you were bluffing.

“If you meant that, you’d look at my back and tell me it again.” Wilhelmina deadpanned and you nodded.

“Okay, show me then.” You said, placing your hand on her lower back. Wilhelmina looked at you to see if you were bluffing but you stared at her expectantly. She moved to the side slightly so you could have a better view before dropping the towel entirely.

Her spine at her lower back was fine but when it came to the top, it began bulging and had discoloured skin around it. Your heart ached for Wilhelmina and it didn’t make you disgusted. It only made you want to kiss her more.

Your hand reached up and gently glided against the skin, hearing Wilhelmina take in a deep breath, “Does it hurt?”

“A little bit. But I can cope. But sometimes it gets really tense.” She muttered, with the same humiliated voice as earlier. “What do you think?”

“I think…” You trailed off, before moving your hands to her shoulders and leaning in even closer. “I love you even more.” Your lips brushed against her ear, she turned again, to face you. Not realising her chest was bare. You however, kept your gaze strictly on her face.

“You love me?” She asked and you nodded, she leaned in to kiss you. It was soft, sweet and it made Wilhelmina forget her insecurities. She moved closer to you and you felt her chest rub against yours. You pulled back just as she wanted to heat it up more.

“Although kissing you is wonderful, I feel maybe a top is in order.” You looked at her chest and she nodded, cheeks heating up.

You stood again and moved away the towel before letting Wilhelmina lifting her arms and getting her head in. You pulled down her top below her stomach and looked at her before placing a kiss to her forehead.

“I love you too.” She murmured and you smiled against her.

She was your equal.

[max--phillips]

Y’all ready to hear about my Batshit Day??????????

1) arrive at work. Find out I don’t have to go to Ohio, thankfully. Send emails to my first two customers and leave immediately. It’s my first day by myself after training. I’ve got this.

2) I’m going down Interstate 74 in the company Prius. There’s a stretch of road where mowing crews are working. As I’m passing the mowing crews, something hits either the edge of the windshield or the beam right next to the windshield and scares the hell out of me. Nothing is broken, though, so I move on with my life. Until 20 minutes later when I see a streak of water start to creep across the windshield except—it’s not a streak of water! That’s a crack!!!! Leave it to me to have something break on my first day by myself.

3) first customer goes smoothly. No problems other than it took me 16 billion years to figure out how to get it to show me the odometer. Otherwise, uneventful. Called my workplace to ask what I need to do about the cracked windshield, and they said it’ll be fine as long as I feel like it’s safe to drive. Move on to customer number 2

4) customer number 2 responds to my email that he never received any communication thst his appointment was moved from 10 to 1:30. (This is a lie. I was literally in the room when one of my coworkers was on the phone with him confirming this reschedule.) When I arrive he is (justifiably, in his defense) pretty angry about the car he got. He’s returning it because it’s rusted to hell. Goes on to complain to me for 15 minutes. Otherwise uneventful.

5) realize I’m going to make it back to my workplace a half an hour after I’m supposed to be at my last appointment, which is an hour away from my workplace. This is made worse thanks to the fact there’s an accident on the interstate and it takes me 15 minutes to go two miles at one point. I ask for some assistance on slack, and when I arrive the car is already loaded onto the hauler ready to go. Excellent! I send an email to the third customer explaining what I still need from them and that I’ll be kinda late. They aren’t worried about it.

6) arrive at final appointment an hour and a half late, and thank the customer for his flexibility. Proceed to tear the scab off the back of my hand for a SECOND FUCKING TIME. Whatever. I’m glad I put a mini first aid kit in my backpack last night. Narrowly avoid the incoming storm as I finish up with customer 3, otherwise nothing notable to report.

7) drive through New Castle, IN’s downtown area going way under the speed limit with my hazards on because the rain is coming down so hard. It is also hailing. Hail is very disconcerting when you’re in what is essentially a big aluminum box.

8) arrive back to my workplace a half an hour after my shift was supposed to end. One of my coworkers who was also supposed to be out of here a half an hour ago is still there. I find this odd. Upon further investigation, I find out that the majority of the cars in our lot have hail damage!! Guess who’s car was ALSO parked in that lot????? MINE!!!

So I have a big fucking hail crack smack in the middle of my windshield, and the hood and roof of my car are dented to hell. But in a redemption moment, the Prius I was driving earlier ALSO got hail damage, including on the windshield, so my crack has buddies now and it would’ve needed repaired anyway. So at least there was that.

9) I clocked out an hour after my shift was supposed to end. I am now home and very tired. Tomorrow is going to be very interesting considering we can only deliver/sell cars that only have body damage. If it has any damage to the windshield, it’s a safety issue; if it has body damage, that we can fix as an after-sale repair at no cost to the customer. But uhh… yeah!! That’s gonna be fun! Or . Something

[lost-in-sokovia]

Sleep Tight

hi guys!! this is for a writing challenge run by @iguessweallcrazyithinktho ! i’m doing prompt #81 with peter parker! please enjoy!😊

81. “Steal the blankets again and I’ll put my cold feet on you.”

Warnings: absolutely none, purely fluff and comedic material

10:30 PM

“Alright look,” Tony huffed in Peter’s doorway as he cast a shadow over the floor. “I don’t want to hear any funny business in here tonight. You two have a big day with us tomorrow and I don’t need to be looking after two tired children, got it?” He verified seriously as he studied you intensely. You and Peter nodded, trying to hold back laughter.

“You’ll have no trouble from us Mr. Stark,” you replied with a hint of sarcasm. Tony raised an eyebrow before turning around to make his way out.

“And I don’t need anyone getting pregnant in here! Good night!” Tony added quickly before closing the door, leaving you and Peter in light only provided by the moon. You exploded in laughter as Peter fidgeted awkwardly.

Tony had finally decided to let the two of you have a sleepover in Peter’s room. The two of you had been dating for three months, but Tony knew how guys worked. Peter wasn’t the normal high school boy and you were smarter than to allow something mature to happen, and once Tony had completely wrapped his head around that he said okay. (Well, it wasn’t all Tony... it took lots of begging and bothering from you for him to clear the idea.)

You sat with Peter on his bed with the covers pulled up to your laps. You leaned against the headboard and took a couple breaths as you calmed down from laughing.

“Alright, so should we go to sleep now? It is 10:30,” Peter pointed out. You brushed it off and turned on the lamp on top of the nightstand. Peter’s eyes widened and he cocked an eyebrow in confusion.

“Nah, let’s do something fun!” You urged enthusiastically with sparkling eyes. His mouth parted but he had no words to say.

“But (Y/N), you heard Mr. Stark... He needs us on our best game tomorrow and-“

“Oh Peter, sometimes you just gotta live a little,” you explained as you kicked off the cover and made your way over to Peter’s window. He scrambled out of bed and ran up to stand by you. You two looked out high over the bright New York City skyline. You frowned.

“These windows don’t open, I forgot...” you muttered in concentration. You looked up and grabbed Peter’s hand. “Come on, we’re going out to the balcony.” You smiled. Peter bit his lip and tried to pull you back from running. You glared at him as he stared at you nervously, his brown eyes not breaking eye contact.

“Oh dear god, let’s go!” You said, leaving no room for argument. You yanked him along as you opened his door and ran as quietly as you could through the hall and down the stairs.

The rest of Stark Tower was fast asleep in preparation for the mission tomorrow, so it was no trouble making your way out without being seen. The only task you had to do was stay quiet while doing it.

Peter glanced around nervously, worried Tony could pop out at any second and catch you two. He glanced at his hand in yours while continuing to run behind you. He knew you were excited about this and loved nighttime shenanigans, but he felt a strong sense of responsibility of making sure you got to bed at a reasonable time.

You gently opened the glass door that led out to the balcony. You ran up to the edge and let go of Peter’s hand as he came up next to you.

“Alright Peter,” you panted. “How far can you shoot a web?” you asked. He scoffed slightly in disbelief, shaking his head.

“We’re doing this? R-Right now?”

“Right now,” you confirmed. He rolled his eyes as he reluctantly grabbed his web shooter out of his pocket. You watched him closely in fascination as he shot webs as far as he could into the night.

11:11 PM

After a little more than thirty minutes of placing bets and shooting webs, the two of you found yourselves back in Peter’s room.

Peter was now on board with staying up late. Wasn’t anything he hadn’t done before. You had become an Avenger after him, so he had more experience in the arena of staying up the night before a mission. And yet you were always more on board with the idea of doing it first.

The two of you layed on the wrong side of his bed and stared at the dark ceiling as you talked about everything and anything below the sun.

“Peter, Peter, do you think Steve has ever had a girlfriend?” You giggled. Peter laughed and ran a hand through his messy brown hair.

“Ah man... I mean, maybe? He’s Captain America!” He reasoned. You shook your head and bit your lip from laughing.

“No no but back in the 40’s he was all lil’ and scrawny and Bucky was the ladies man. Then he became a hot beefcake but he had to be frozen aND DIDN’T WAKE UP UNTIL LIKE WHAT, 9 YEARS AGO?” You basically screamed as you laughed hysterically. Peter covered your mouth to try and hush you as he laughed along.

“Okay okay smash or pass; 40’s Steve,” you asked as you looked at Peter’s figure in the dark. Peter thought for a moment.

“I don’t know about smash, but like, I’d take him to dinner and give him a nice date,” Peter responded. You stared for a moment before the two of you broke out in laughter.

“You’re so weird!” You cackled as you wiped away your tears of laughter. “‘I’d take him out to dinner’ my god Peter! Have you thought about this before?” You asked with a light slap on the shoulder. Peter looked at you and shook his head.

“No, I-“ he tried to interject as he cut himself off with laughter.

“Peter Parker thinks about dating Captain America!” You howled. Peter covered your mouth and shushed you as you both tried to calm down.

“Okay (Y/N), smash or pass Steve now?” Peter asked at a low volume with a curious smirk. You looked at him with wide eyes and an open mouth.

“Oh my god, are you kidding? I’d smash the hell out of him!” You laughed. Peter joined back in and stared at the ceiling. Playing a game like this in the day probably wouldn’t have been a good idea, but nighttime makes people slap happy and they forget about what was said the past night. Plus, Peter knew it was all a game. He would never worry about you actually trying to date a guy nearly 70 decades older than you.

“Would you smash him?” You gasped suddenly and put an arm on his shoulder.

“I mean...” Peter shrugged. You howled uncontrollably.

12:04 AM

“I think it’s time we go to sleep, yeah?” Peter said quietly as you nodded against his chest. The two of you were now on the right side of the bed with pillows scattered everywhere. After you had run out of people in little game last night you had initiated a pillow fight, which ended with you drifting off on Peter’s chest after calling a truce because “(Y/N) you’re going to break a window.”

Peter shifted you off of him slightly and readjusted under the sheets. You and him were now on opposite sides of the bed, connected only by holding hands.

After Peter looked at you sleeping one more time, he exhaled and closed his eyes, finally ready for sleep.

Everything was fine until he rolled over.

“Mph, Peter,” you moaned bitterly, furrowing your eyebrows with your eyes still closed. “Stop hogging up the blankets.” You pulled the warm covers back up around you.

“Sorry, sorry,” he whispered back. Your breathing regulated again as you fell back into sleep. Peter didn’t comprehend things well when he was asleep, therefore shifting away from you and taking the covers with him. You shivered as the cold air whooshed over your body.

“Peter!” you groaned louder, sitting up and just barely opening your eyes. “Stop taking the damn blankets!” You huffed and slammed your head back on the pillow. You weren’t always the happiest when you were trying to get some sleep. You were very irritable and easy to tick off, and poor incompetent Peter was just pushing your buttons.

Peter, thinking it would help, turned around thinking he couldn’t move away from you any more. The problems were, however, he was wrong and there were apparently not enough blankets either.

He moved away and you bolted up in irritation.

“Peter.” You grabbed his shoulders in the darkness and faced him towards you as he startled awake and stared at you. “Steal the blankets again and I’ll put my cold feet on you. Got it?” You snapped. He nodded as you threw yourself back down again and this time wrapped yourself around him so the blankets would always be there.

Moments passed and the blankets stayed, engulfing you with warmth. You felt Peter’s chest raise and lower as you closed your eyes and smiled contently. Finally, you could go to sleep as well.

And as you laid there with your arms wrapped around him, you suddenly started to roll with him towards a direction with a dead end. Thud.

~•~•~•~•~

7:15 AM

Tony knocked gently and opened Peter’s door to get you both up.

He blinked a few times when he saw the scene in Peter’s room; you were on the floor with a tangled sheet stretched out from the bed to you as you hugged a pillow, Peter was laying across the bed with his hands and arms hanging out on either side as he layed on top of the sheet that barely covered you. Pillows were scattered all across the floor and a few chunks of polyester layed along a the pillows that had been slightly snagged open.

Tony shook his head and smirked slightly. He walked in and sat at the edge of Peter’s bed, chuckling slightly at you sprawled out on the floor.

Tony reached over and gently shook Peter’s shoulder. “Hey buddy, time to wake up,” he told him. Peter lifted his head and blinked his groggy eyes a few times. He rolled over and tried to comb back his wild brown hair with his hands. He nodded when he realized it was Tony and stretched his arms.

“There we go.” Tony clapped his hands a little before then reaching down to nudge you. “Let’s go (Y/N). Time to hustle,” he said before swiftly walking out. You startled awake and looked around a couple times before remembering where you were and the events of the previous night.

You groaned dramatically as you plopped your face back on the pillow. You heard Peter’s feet drop to the floor as he got up and put his hand on your shoulder.

“Did you sleep well on the floor?” He teased lightly. You whipped around and glared at him.

“You’re a real blanket hog, you know that?” You growled lightly as you sat you reluctantly. Your back hurt slightly from sleeping on the floor and you cursed under your breath, knowing that was going to be a real advantage while fighting.

Peter pulled you up into a hug and you sighed, letting him support all your weight.

“You’re gonna have to work on the blanket thing,” your voice muffled on his shoulder. He laughed before letting you go and walking to the bathroom.

“Who ever said you could sleepover again?” He retorted jokingly. Your laugh dripped with sarcasm as he shot you a playful glance.

“Good one Parker, good one...”

i hope you guys enjoyed! it’s been a minute since i wrote for peter so it was nice to give him some attention😊 thanks so much for reading!🤍 ( @lookalivefrosty )

[thisismandee]

You’re my PainKiller (Spencer Reid x F!Reader)

Listen up! This is my first Spencer Reid fanfiction so please be nice I am not sure how long this will end up being also I’m bad at summarizes so I apologize. 

Part 1

Word Count: 2k

Content warning: Nothing really in this one. Teasing, but there will be questi0onable themes later, but for right now I guess just fluff? 

Summary: This first part is just introducing the character and their rlatri0onships with the team. She does have a special kind of relationship with a certain Genius. It’s slow in the beginning but the angst and the storyline will get better. 

You woke up to the buzzing of your phone. You sighed when you looked over and saw who was calling you. You would never get used to being woken up at ungodly hours to work on cases. It wasn’t the cases themselves but it was the fact that you loved your sleep, and being woken up mid slumber was always a bummer. 

“Hey, JJ what’s up?” You said into the phone.

“Hey Y/N, we have a case.” JJ answered you through the phone.

You looked over at the clock on your bedside. It lit up with the time, 4:33am.

“I know crime never stops, but couldn’t it happen not while I’m in bed?” you scoffed into the phone.

“I know, I know, you love your beauty sleep.” JJ laughed at you on the phone. “Also I haven’t called Reid yet, I figured you could call him seeing that you are going to be picking up anyways.”

“Yeah can do.” You and Reid would carpool all the time so she wasn’t wrong for assuming that you would be giving him a ride. “We will be there soon JJ.”

“See you soon.”

You hung up the phone, and sat up in your bed. You turned on the lamp that was right next to you and rubbed the sleep from your eyes. You didn’t want to but you had to get up. You finally found the motivation to get out of your comfortable bed. You grabbed your phone again and tapped on the top number in your favorites. You put the phone up to your ear and walked towards your closet to figure out an outfit and repack your go bag. The phone only rang twice before you heard a voice on the other end. 

“Y/N, is everything okay? What’s up?” The sound of Spencer Reid, your best friend comes through the phone. You had known Spencer since you started at the BAU about one year ago now. You had become quick friends, and not long after you became best friends, you hung out almost every spare moment you got and that was okay with you. Ever since moving to be closer to work you had lost contact with friends and talking to family was hard because of your crazy schedule. So you took delight in listening to your friend's voice on the other end.

“Define okay? I got woken up at 4:30 in the morning.” You grabbed a blouse from inside your closet, and a pair of slacks from your dresser that was nearby. You could hear Spencer laugh into the phone. “Anyways, we have a case. I am getting ready now and I will be at your place in 10 minutes, when I get there you better be ready or you are going to be walking to work.”

“Wow, someone really did wake up on the wrong side of the bed huh.” You could sense Spencer's sarcasm through the phone and you couldn’t help cracking a smile. “Okay sleeping beauty I’ll be ready in 9, plenty of time until you get here.”

You couldn’t help but smile. You always enjoyed yours and Spencer’s banter. You walked into your bathroom. “Okay, well I will see you soon agent.”

“See you soon.”

 You tossed your phone on your bed while you went into your bathroom to change. You put on a bit of makeup and put your hair in a ponytail. You were lucky enough that you didn’t have to do much to get ready, mostly because you didn’t have the time to get ready like you wanted to. You love your job at the BAU but there are always downfalls, just like with any job. It’s just with this job you don’t have a lot of time to have a love life, or a social life, or let alone time to yourself. It was constant go, go, go. The plus side was that you had some really great co-workers and they had become family to you. You headed back in your room and saw that five minutes had passed. You quickly put on your shoes, grabbed your go bag and your keys and rushed out the door. 

It took you only a couple of minutes to pull up to Spencer’s apartment. You didn’t have to call him to announce your presence, he was already walking out of the building as you pulled up. He opened up your door and got into the front seat. 

“Hey are you ready?” He said as he sat down and buckled up.

“As ready as I’ll ever be. “ you respond. You start up your car and start the short drive to the office. “So, I was thinking while I was on my way over, but did you want to hang out after this case. I’ve been really wanting to rewatch Doctor Who and I figured we could get delivery and binge it together.” 

“You just want to watch David Tennant don’t you?” He smiled towards you. You might have let it slip that you thought David Tennant was attractive and your favorite Doctor, and of course Reid would remember it one because of how close you guys were and also because of his edict memory.

“Maaaaybe.” You take a chance to glance over at him and smile back. He was just staring at you and smiling. You had always loved when he smiled, and you always loved when you were the one that made him smile. Some would say that you had a crush, but you were never too sure. You had told yourself that you just really enjoyed his company. “So  are you going to come over or am I going to have to get Take Out and watch Doctor Who by myself?”

“I didn’t say I was not going to come over. You know I can’t say no to Doctor Who.” He turned towards the road. The car went silent, to others it might have been awkward but the silence between you two was comfortable. You both were comfortable around each other, now that you were thinking about it, you might have one of the very few people that Reid lets touch him. You don’t mean in a gross way, but more of an innocent way, like hugs or pushing his shoulder as a tease. The resident genius at the BAU was a germaphobe and wasn’t that fond of touch but you were a select few. 

Before you knew it you were turning into the parking lot for the office building. You had found your normal parking spot and hopped out of your car. You and Spencer headed towards the building. You flashed your badges to the people that needed to see them and you walked into the elevator. As the doors closed you looked over at Spencer and you could see that he was zoning out, so you decided to have a bit of fun. One time Morgan told you about a time him and Reid were stuck in an elevator and it got stuck. To say the least Spencer freaked out. It was early but you could still have fun.

As you could feel the elevator moving up you decided to jump, and not just a small bounce but a proper jump. Instantly Spencer shot a stare at you as he felt the box you guys were in move with your jump. You could tell that there was a mixture of fear and anger in his eyes, but you couldn’t help but laugh. 

“It’s not funny Y/N, there are six elevator deaths per year, not to mention the 10,000 injuries that require hospilizations.” You couldn’t stop laughing. “It’s not funny!”

The doors opened up the floor for the BAU. “You should have seen your face Spencer. Remind me to ask Garcia for a copy of that footage later.” You walked out of the elevator.

Spencer came chasing after you. “Y/N don’t you dare!” You ignored his plea and made your way to the bullpen. You had a massive grin on your face as you sat down at your desk. You and Spencer were the first ones to get there. Spencer walked through the doors and took a seat at his desk that was right across from yours “That wasn’t funny.” He mumbled under his breath.

“Oh don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone about how Spencer Reid is scared of elevators.”

“Reid is scared of elevators?” You heard a voice from the doorway. You looked up and saw Emily Prentiss in the doorway heading towards her desk. You bit your lip trying to hold in a laugh. You could see Reid’s face fall.

“No, I am not scared of elevators, I have a rational fear based off of statistics that elevators are not always safe when you decide to mess around in them.”

“Who was messing around in an elevator?” You heard the voice of Derek Morgan as he walked through the door. 

“Not like that Morgan, me and Y/N were in the elevator...” Spencer started.

“Stop right there pretty boy, I don’t need to know what you and Y/N did in the elevator before we got here. You can keep that between you two lovebirds.”

You were practically keeling over in laughter at this point. The whole situation had played out perfectly. You could see that Spencer had given up trying to talk about the topic. You were used to the team teasing you and Spencer for being close, you even thought that some of them thought you and him were secretly dating, which wasn’t true, you were just close and liked to hang out. That was it. That's what you told yourself anyways. You looked up and saw Spencer staring at you, you could feel the heat in your checks from your laughing fit. You could tell he felt embarrassed, he didn’t do well with Morgan’s teasing sometimes. 

“Sorry” you mouthed to him.

“You owe me” He whispered back. 

You smiled at him, you knew you would be able to make it up to him. He would forgive you easily, you would just have to get him a coffee one morning, and it would be like this morning’s teasing session had never happened. Everyone hung around the bullpen and talked about life until everyone had finally showed up. You and your coworkers were close, just like family. 

Hotch was the boss and could be a hardass, but he always showed that he cared for everyone. Rossi, he was like that cool italian uncle that everyone loved. JJ was a great friend and great mother, she was always there if you ever needed to talk. Derek was like a big brother, he is protective over his team but he also knows how to have a great time. Next was Emily. You had started not long after her, so you got to know her pretty quickly. Then there was the wonderful Garcia. She was a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day. You had found yourself becoming close to her because your personalities meshed perfectly, both bubbly and positive outlooks. However, the only difference was Garcia liked to stay behind the scenes when it came to cases and you liked to be on the frontline. Lastly, was obviously the genius of the group, Spencer Reid. You and him had become close because you were the most similar in age and you were both ‘nerds’ in your own ways. You loved this weird family but they were yours.

You were so deep in thought that you hadn’t noticed everyone had arrived. You heard JJ yell from the round table room that the case was ready to be reviewed. You got up from your desk and followed behind the group as you entered the room to get briefed on the case, and get prepared to save more lives. This was your dream job and even when it got upsetting you were always ready to help.

You took your seat next to Reid and Morgan. 

“Alright everyone, thank you for being here so early in the morning.” JJ started. Before you knew it you were on your way to the plane. Wheels up in 30, like always.

[emmy-writes-sometimes]

Work It Out

After a drunken fight with your dad, Sebastian, you go to your uncle’s house where he forces the two of you to work it out.

-

           “Jesus, babe, just…” Your boyfriend was doing his best to get you back into your bedroom from the fire escape outside your window, but he wasn’t doing enough. You were so drunk that you could barely swing your leg over. You just wanted to sleep. But your boyfriend had to sneak you back in because it was him who snuck you out.

           “I’m tryingggg,” you slurred. He laughed and physically picked you up, carrying you through the window. He set food on the ground and put you back down, helping to steady you. “Well, my dad isn’t here. Maybe he didn’t find out.”

           “Really, Y/n? Think again.” Your father’s voice was cross as he sat in your desk chair, arms crossed against his chest.

           “Oh, fantastic,” you said. That was probably the clearest sentence you’d said in a while. You were drunk enough that consequences didn’t seem that bad, but you were also drunk enough to smart off to him when you normally never would.

           “Alex, I called you an Uber. It should be downstairs. Text Y/n and I’ll know you got home safe. And use the front door, not the fire escape.” Your boyfriend’s cheeks flushed and he let you go.

           “Sure. Sorry, Mr. Stan.” Your dad’s eyes softened a little bit.

           “Thank you for making sure my girl got home. But next time she decides to try and sneak out of the house, don’t help her.”

           “Roger that.” Your boyfriend walked out of your room and you soon heard the front door shut, leaving you and your dad. You sat down on your bed while all of that was going on, removing your high heels, and you un-zipped the back of your dress. You grabbed a t-shirt from your dresser and pulled it on, then took your dress off to reveal the shorts you had on underneath. You knew there was a fight coming, but you wished it could wait until tomorrow.

           “What were you even thinking, Y/n?” Your dad asked you. His voice was quiet. His fingers rubbed at his temples and you realized you must have woken him up. He had a flight at 9 the next morning, so he should have been asleep already. It was only 11, but it felt so much later now that you were completely and totally intoxicated.

           “I was thinking I got invited out to a party and I wanted to go?” You said, curling up in a blanket you kept folded at the foot of your bed. Your dad kept the house absolutely freezing cold, and for what reason you would never know. Your dad sighed.

           “I don’t even know what to do here. First you sneak out, when you could’ve just asked me. Then you have the audacity to sneak back in and think I won’t catch you when you’re drunk as hell. Which, by the way, when did you start drinking, because I must have missed that too.” His voice rose and fell and you could just hear how angry he was with you. Even drunk you felt guilty. Sober you would have felt so guilty you could cry yourself to sleep.

           “I’m sorry, Dad,” you responded.

           “Sorry’s not good enough. Do you know how dangerous it is to be out there at night?”

           “Dad, we live on the Upper East Side. If Blair Waldorf didn’t get kidnapped and raped I won’t.” Your dad scoffed at the mention of your favorite show, one he happened to have been in.

           “And that’s besides the point. What you did was so dangerous, Y/n. If you called me, I would’ve picked you up, because what agreement do we have?”

           “If I ever need you, you’re there. No questions asked.”

           “And this would’ve counted. I would’ve come to get you in a heartbeat, but you can’t just sneak out like that. It’s one thing if we’re in Atlanta or California, it’s a whole other thing in Manhattan.” Your vision became clearer and clearer as you started sobering up, but everything your dad was saying fell on deaf ears. You weren’t listening because you were so exhausted.

           “I’m sorry, Daddy.”

           “Oh, don’t do that, I know you’re not sorry,” he rolled his eyes. You never called him Daddy unless you wanted something or you wanted him off your back, and this was one of the latter.

           “I am!” You replied.

           “No, you’re not. Otherwise you wouldn’t have done something so stupid in the first place. I’m so disappointed in you, Y/n. This is why we have rules in place, this is why we have the no questions asked agreement. I’m half tempted to cancel my flight and stay here because you obviously can’t be left on your own for a night.”

           “I promise, I won’t do anything stupid.” If he thought you were serious, he didn’t care.

           “I don’t know if I can believe you.” You suddenly had that feeling in your stomach, and you stood up. “Where do you think you’re going?”

           “To throw up two water bottles of Malibu,” you responded dryly, walking into the bathroom attached to your bedroom. You barely made it to the toilet before you threw up. Instead of holding your hair back, your dad chose the route of going to get you some water.

           “Jesus Christ, babe. This is so unlike you.” You shrugged and picked your head up, thinking you were done for the time being.

           “I know. I’m stupid. I know,” you repeated over and over, accepting the water that he gave you.

           “Alright. Here’s what we’re gonna do. You’re gonna go to bed, I’m going to think about a punishment, and you’re going to take it when you wake up tomorrow at approximately 6 AM to drive me to the airport at 6:30. Got it?” You gave him a thumbs up. “I didn’t raise you to be like this.”

           “You barely even raised me at all,” you snapped back without even meaning to. “You’re always gone, remember?”

           “So you’re saying this is all my fault?”

           “Yeah, buddy!” You replied with a small giggle. “You’re on the right track now.” If you had looked at him, you would have seen the tears in his eyes. Was it really his fault? Was he really so absent from your life that he caused you to act out the first chance you got? He sighed, deciding just to leave you alone.

           “Alright. Just… We’ll talk tomorrow morning.” He slumped out of your room, feeling dejected, angry, and upset as hell because he’d never even thought it could be his fault before. But you pointed out the obvious; if he wasn’t gone all the time, maybe you wouldn’t feel the need to get his attention like this.

           Something inside of you just said fuck it. You were sober enough to walk to the other side of your room, change clothes, and grab your phone charger and wallet. You looked at your phone map for a minute – your uncle Chris was in town, at least for a few days, and he was supposed to take you out to lunch tomorrow anyway.

           Are you up? You texted him. He responded within a second that he was. So it was decided. You had never closed the fire escape window, so you could go back out the way you came in. Your wallet had pepper spray attached to it and you flicked it open, ready to spray anyone who dared mess with you at this time of night. Thankfully, most people in that area of New York just minded their own business unless you looked like you had something valuable. But you, barely sixteen, in a sweatshirt and shorts, carrying a wallet and pepper spray at 11 PM, didn’t look like you had anything of value to yourself even.

           You were halfway to Chris’s hotel when you passed the block with the police precinct, and as if it was on cue, blue and white lights lit up the street. You looked around – you were the only person on the street, so they must have been referring to you. You sighed.

           “I’m sorry, Dad,” you said out loud, rubbing your eyelid as a piece of mascara found its way into your eye. An officer got out of the cruiser and walked over to you with a flashlight.

           “Ma’am, can I ask you what you’re doing on the streets at this time of night?” You sighed. Were you about to lie to the NYPD because you didn’t want to go home? Yes, yes you were. This entire night was dumb, but this was probably the dumbest thing you could’ve done.

           “I was at a friend’s apartment, I’m just going back to my uncle’s hotel,” you explained. “I have pepper spray.” The officer scoffed.

           “It’s not safe for you to be walking around here. Where are you from?”

           “I’m from here, but I live half the time in Atlanta.” You weren’t lying completely there – you did have a Georgia driver’s license, your primary address was all listed in Georgia because that was where you went to middle school because your dad was still working for Marvel at that point.

           “And you’re with your uncle, you said?”

           “Yeah, my parents are divorced.” A lie. Your parents weren’t divorced because they’d never been together. You were the product of a meaningless relationship that your dad spent your entire life trying to make up to you.

           “Alright. Well, we can’t have you walking the streets out here at night, so would you like us to go ahead and bring you back to your uncle’s? How old are you, sixteen?”

           “Sixteen,” you responded. “I can call my uncle now.”

           “You can just get into the back seat of that car.” You nodded and started heading toward the cop car, calling Chris. He answered immediately.

           “Hey, sweetie, what are you doing up?” He asked you. You could tell he was up still – he was always a night owl.

           “I was walking to yours and the police caught me. Can they drive me over?”

           “Yeah, sure. I’ll meet you in the lobby. It seems like you have something to talk about, don’t you?”

           “Yeah. I’m sorry.” You opened the door to the car and got inside.

           “It’s okay. I’ll see you in a few.” You told the cop the address of Chris’s hotel, checking your phone to make sure your dad hadn’t called you or texted you. Nothing. He probably didn’t even know you were gone. That was the con of living on separate floors in an old brownstone – if you left he might not even know. Half the time you just yelled out to figure out if he was there because you couldn’t tell otherwise.

           “I’ll get out and walk you in,” the officer said when you arrived at the hotel. You saw Chris standing in the brightly lit lobby, looking down at his phone, and raised his hand when he saw you.

           “Thank you, officer, for getting her back to me,” Chris said, shaking hands with the cop that had brought you over. They chatted for a minute when the officer recognized him, but they let you go without even asking for any kind of proof of anything whatsoever. As soon as the officer got in the car and left, Chris nearly dragged you over to the elevator.

           “Ow,” you groaned. You knew you were sobering up, but your body still felt loose.

           “What are you doing here? Your dad doesn’t leave until tomorrow morning.”

           “We got in a fight because I got drunk and he said some stuff and I said some stuff that I don’t remember, but it must have been really mean.” Chris sighed, pressing the elevator up, and when you got to the room you sat down in one of the chairs. It was a nice hotel, one he usually stayed at, so you were at least familiar with it.

           “You want some coffee?” He asked you, turning on the hotel’s small instant coffee maker. You nodded, running your hands through your hair. Your phone lit up with a call from your dad, and you didn’t answer. You didn’t know why you didn’t answer; because you were scared of him, because you didn’t want to talk to him, or maybe a combination of both. You just wanted to be with Chris right now – he always knew how to talk you down when you argued, and you knew he wouldn’t judge you for being drunk and stupid because he’d spent half of his teenage years doing the same thing.

           “Thanks,” you said as he handed you a hot cup of coffee a minute later. He sat beside you and rubbed your back, trying to warm you up from the freezing March weather.

           “Any reason why Seb’s calling you non-stop?”

           “Yeah,” you said. “He probably just realized I’m gone.” Chris sighed.

           “You can’t just run away in the middle of the night, half drunk, and not tell your dad. I’ll call him and…” Just as he was talking, there was a knock at his hotel room door. He sighed and stood up, confused as to who it could be, and when he opened the door, it was Sebastian. He opened the door wider for him to come in, and your dad just stared you down.

           “Really, Y/n?” He asked loudly.

           “Okay, you two, some rules. No yelling. You talk this out. I’m going down to the bar to catch the end of the hockey game. If I get a noise complaint, it’s all on you guys. Deal?” You both nodded and Chris left the room, leaving the two of you alone.

           “How’d you get here?” Your dad asked you, sitting down on the bed across from you. You offered him a sip of your coffee, which he took, and handed back to you.

           “A cop found me so I lied and said I was staying with Chris,” you admitted.

           “Well, at least it was a cop and not some rando. Babe, you can’t run away every time we get into an argument.”

           “I don’t even know why I did.” You took a sip of coffee and it warmed you up and woke you up at the same time, causing you to sit up a little straighter. He sighed, his head in his hands.

           “I didn’t mean anything of what I said back there. I was just aggravated that you snuck out. And I’m glad you were with your boyfriend, but still. You have to tell me where you’re going, that’s why we have that rule.”

           “I know. I get it.”

           “I thought you actually ran away ran away.”

           “I just came here because I knew he’d let me stay with him until you were gone.” Your dad sighed. “I didn’t mean to say it was your fault. It’s not. It’s mine.”

           “No, you were right. I wasn’t here. For a lot of things. I was too busy being Bucky Barnes that I forgot how to be your dad, and I’m sorry. You needed a dad and that was the one role I didn’t know how to do.” You were both quiet for a minute. “Why don’t you come out to L.A. with me tomorrow? We can take a few days after my audition, just you and me, and we can get ourselves together.”

           “I’d like that.” It had been a long time since he’d taken you anywhere without the intention of just letting you stay in a hotel all day. “You work hard. And I know that. I just miss you. And I guess I just got mad because I miss you.”

           “I miss you too, babe. Come here.” You stood up at the same time he did and he wrapped you in a hug. He could still smell the alcohol on your breath, but he paid no mind to it. He just hugged you tighter than he had in a long time. That was when the door opened again and Chris was standing there.

           “Oh, thank God, you worked it out. Seb, how’d you even know she was here?”

           “Would you believe me if I said I was coming to talk to you because I didn’t even know she was gone?” Chris chuckled.

           “Yeah, I actually would believe that.” Your dad laughed, letting you go finally.

           “Alright, we’re gonna head home. I’m taking her out to L.A. with me, but if you wanna use the house you’re welcome to take the guest room still.”

           “Thanks, man. And the both of you just need to learn how to talk to each other, because if I wasn’t here you’d probably still be in a screaming match.” You sniffled and gave Chris a hug, thanking him, and your dad called a car to come get the both of you.

           “By the way, water bottles full of Malibu? I know it’s clear, but you should really get a colored water bottle if you’re gonna do that.” You elbowed your dad, laughing for the first time in forever, and wiped away a tear that had been on your face.

A/N: So I ended up combining three requests with this, one where she sneaks in with her boyfriend, one where she goes to Chris’s after an argument, and one where she gets picked up by the police. I hope that’s okay with you guys, but I thought they all worked so well together that I might as well!

[cafedanslanuit]

hcs for main 6 with an mc that can’t sleep unless their significant other is with them in bed and will just stay up until they make it to bed? thank you

sorry for the delay but it’s hereeee

Yoosung

Big issue here because our boy stays up pretty late playing LOLOL

But you can’t sleep unless he’s in bed with you

He’s devastated the first time he realizes is 4 am, your eyes are all puffy but you can’t manage to sleep

He thought you were already asleep!

He tries giving you relaxing tea, really comfortable pillows, but nothing works

So he compromises

He buys one of those tables that fold up and starts gaming in bed

Now, you can sleep and he can keep on playing, yay!

Jaehee

Jaehee knows about all nighters. She’s probably the best example on why you shouldn’t do that

She used to work late at the office, but felt incredibly guilty when it was 1 am and you were still waiting for her

Especially because she knew you had to be on your office by 7 am

At first, she doesn’t think much about it because she can run on little sleep most days

But once, you go out on a quick date at Starbucks. You both sat down and when they called your names, she got up to pick up your orders. When she came back, you were asleep on the table

So, Jaehee had to look for options

Getting rid of her workload wasn’t an option (for now)

So now she stays in bed with you while working on her laptop

Are you sure the light doesn’t bother you, MC? I can work on little light, just tell m– It’s ok, Jaehee.

Zen

This one need to have a better schedule

So, needing him by your side to fall asleep is actually pretty good for him

He wants to stay up late practising his lines, but can he miss out on cuddling his princess and getting his beauty sleep

Damn right he can’t

Major snuggler

Once, you go away for a few days and he realises now he can’t fall asleep without you

He makes sure to videocall you until you both fall asleep

Will definitely whisper soft words or sing a pretty lullaby when you’re in his arms

Won’t admit to anyone, but loves being the little spoon too

Jumin

We’ve reached a predicament

See, Jumin likes going to bed early, sometimes even earlier than you which is great

But he also travels a lot due to his job, so there are nights when he won’t come home at all

He doesn’t notice you can’t fall asleep without him because you don’t tell him, not wanting to bother him

But one time he travels really far, he sees you online at 3:30 a.m. (it’s 9:30 a.m. for him though)

He thinks about texting you, but he thinks maybe you fell asleep with your laptop open, so he doesn’t want to disturb you

But it’s the same the next day

“Is everything alright, love? What are you doing up so late?”

“I’m fine, darling. I got caught up in a movie. It just ended, will go back to bed. Night

It’s one hour later and you’re still online though

He doesn’t want to be a father figure to you, he doesn’t want to force you to go to bed but now he’s worried

He asks Jaehee about it and she says you look tired and have dark circles under your eyes

“My love, I’m in no way trying to tell you when to go to bed, but now I’m worried about your health. Have you been eating? Is the food the chef makes any good? Tell me, please”.

“I’m okay, Jumin. Don’t worry, it’s silly.”

He insists

“It’s just really hard to fall asleep without you here”

You can almost listen to Jumin’s heart breaking

Now, every time he travels and he knows it’s around 11 p.m. on your timezone, he starts a videocall. He’s usually pretty busy and most of the time in a meeting, but he never misses a day. He places the phone so it points to him and keeps on with his meeting, knowing you can fall asleep just by hearing his voice.

It’s the next best thing he can do. And you love him for it.

Saeyoung

“Are you coming to bed?” “Not soon, MC, why?” “It’s really hard to fall asleep without you, honey”

Saeyoung.exe is not responding

Saeyoung.exe has stopped working

howcanyoubesocutemcwhatdididotodeservethis

You see, unlike Yoosung, he can’t just take his laptop to bed. He used several laptops and screens

If Mahoma doesn’t go to the mountain…

He dims the lights, turns on a lamp by his side and pulls the studio coach close to him.

It’s not the same. And most of the time, it doesn’t work out. The coach isn’t as comfortable as your bed, and once you woke up with a killer backpain.

So he tries to change his schedule

And fails miserably

yo, i get him, i can’t be productive or functional in the mornings

So he decides to cuddle up with you at night, ignoring the work he has. Yes, it’s his job and it does pay well, but he can’t have you walking around with pain.

Once you fall asleep, he goes back to hacking

He’s always sure to be there when you wake up in the morning, though. Even if when you do, he has already fallen asleep.

[youralternantpersonality]

Eternal Love

Paul x Reader: Eternal Love.

Part 1: Eternal Love

Part 2: Everlasting Love

Part 3: Endless Love

Part 4: Enduring Love

***

Darkness. All I see is darkness…I’m calm yet scared. I don’t understand what’s going on. I am in the forest in La Push, walking aimlessly. Not heading anywhere. I want to go home but I also like it here. I feel…at peace. I look over and I see a never-ending path of trees. What makes it eerie is that there’s no animals, no background noise, even when I get close enough to the dirt, no worms, ants, spiders, anything. I feel like I’ve been stuck here for almost an hour or so. And after some time, I realize something…where’s my dog?

“Snout! Snout! Where are you?” I yell and start looking around. I hear a bark in the distance and run towards it.

“Snout! Baby, come here!” I hear more barking and I run towards that direction. Something seems familiar about this. I just can’t figure out what it was.

Paul’s POV

Five days. That’s how long it’s been since the good doctor Cullen has told me that the love of my life, the only reason I even exist, the one who would calm me yet irritate me out of love, The One; gone. At least, not completely. She’s in a vegetable state—can’t move willingly, can’t hear, smell, taste anything. Hooked up to a machine that is keeping her on this earth. I haven’t moved from this spot by her bed unless I have to shower and eat (demands by Emily).

As I sit here, looking at my beautiful Y/n, bruises along her left side of her body, a cast that covers her arm, hip, and legs, bandages wrapped around her head, I can’t help but cry nonexistent tears. I have cried all of what I had left over the past few days. I can remember everything that happened so clearly. Regret consumed me, so much so, that Dr. Cullen was gracious enough to fix the damages in the bathroom attached to her room when I smashed my fist into the mirror, and he got her, her suite in the hospital.

I fucked up. Everyone tried to make me feel better, but deep down, we all know what I did was what put her in this situation. Which is why I begged, no pleaded, even bargained with the Good Doctor to change her. He wanted to help, but because of the treaty….

“…I cannot Paul. The treaty states…”

“Fuck the treaty! She’s the love of my life! I can’t lose her! I may have fucked up and caused this, but I can’t let her go! Please!” I pleaded outside of his home. His wife, Esme, came next to me and hugged me as I fell to the ground. I didn’t care if she was eerie rock solid or cold as ice, I just needed my Y/n/n back.

As I am looking at her currently, caressing her little finger that is hanging outside her cast, I think back to how we met.

At the Beach: September 2nd, 2018;

There was a birthday party at the beach and, like what anyone would expect from us, the guys and I crashed it. It seemed boring until we, I, showed up. The host was too tipsy to give a crap and was just happy to see more people. I was flirting, per usual, with some lovely girls when the host calls out a name. And what made me respond was the voice and fragrance that came with it.

“What hoe!” a laugh followed afterward. The wind blew a sweet fragrance, pomegranate mango with an orange-like citrus smell to it. I turned my head at the right time to see Y/n. I couldn’t take my eyes off her as she walked towards who I found out later to be Angela—one of Bella’s old friends. She went up to hug her and Y/n looked around. That’s where our eyes came in contact. Everything else around me disappeared and I didn’t care for anyone or anything around me. I slowly made my way up to her and she just smiles as I do so.

“Hello, beautiful. I don’t think I’ve seen you around here. I’m Paul, what’s your name?” I smile, not one of my flirty smiles, a genuine smile. It’s weird, I never wanted to imprint EVER in my life, but over time, it didn’t seem too bad. And now, I’m not complaining.

“Hmm, you seem dangerous.” A cheeky smile is placed on her face, she looks me up and down and turns her body towards me.

“I’m Y/n, but people call me Y/n/n.” I smile and shake her hand. Both of our eyes widen at the electricity flow, the magnetic force pulling us to one another, and this cloud 9 effect that is taking over. I look down at her and smile.

“Hmm, you seem like you’re about to ruin my life,” I said jokingly. She smiles and laughs.

“I guess we’re a match huh?”

“I guess we are. So, tell me about yourself.” And from then on, we were together.

But it seems like life wanted to make a full circle.

Current Day: August 30th, 2020

“Paul, the council is still debating. I know this is hard, but please, at least for Emily, go home and get some rest.” Sam said. Normally, I’d take alphas orders, but this time, I can’t. I shake my head and head towards the bathroom. I brush past him and Jake and just stand there behind the door. I look at myself in the mirror and can see emotional and physical damage.

I’ve lost weight, I have deep dark circles around my eyes, my eyes itself is bloodshot red. My skin is sickly pale, not it’s normal “golden glow honey brown sugar” skin that my little raven called it. I laugh at that memory. She was whimsical, mysterious, and protective like a raven. Her secret personality was as big as one too. She called you in naturally by her beauty—inner and outer beauty.

At Paul’s house: November 2018

We were laying on the couch relaxing before I had to go on patrol. She was reading a book with her legs planted in my lap, I was deep engrossed to the video game I was playing when suddenly, I feel a pair of eyes on me.

“Make a video to remember this moment then replay it when you miss me.” I smile and look over at her. All I could see is her big y/e/c eyes staring back at me. One eyebrow raised and her book was covering the bottom half of her face.

“You know,” she says sitting up, putting down the book, “it’s not fair how clear and bright your skin is. You have this…this golden glow…with, like, honey brown sugar swirled in it. You suck.” She says pouting. I pause the game, lean over to her, and place most of my weight on her while kissing her neck. She squeals underneath me and starts laughing. I smile and kiss her softly while poking my nose into her cheek.

“I love every bit of you, my love. You may see flaws, but with my heightened eyesight, I can see little freckles kissed all along your face. Matter of fact, let me show you where.” Then I proceeded to kiss all over her face. She laughs uncontrollably.

“But you don’t have the curse of hyperpigmentation! You see freckles, I see never-ending scars.” I hate it when she gets like this. It hurts me, to see the love of my life feel as if she has to be something different to even be next to me.

“Baby, stop,” I said calmly, I learned quickly that I would have to control my tone around her. She can read me like a book and because her emotions can get the best of her, yelling could end in two ways. One, she’ll fight back—she’s all bark and bites—so no one messes with her for a while when she’s at that point. Or two, she starts tearing up and holds back tears. Not for manipulation reasons that most girls do, but for the fact that she intakes certain emotions and she has no control over hers.

“I know you may feel that way, and you have to remember, I did too. You know, I was human like you before my wolfy sense’s kicked in.” I smile as she smiles back. “Just know my love, I don’t see anything wrong with you. I could never.” I place my forehead on hers. “I love you too much to worry about things like that.” I kiss her. She looks at me and says,

“So, if you didn’t love me, you’d notice it?” I look at her with a blank face, roll my eyes, and just roll off the couch. I can feel her watching me.

“Well…”

“You know, you’re a little shit, right?” I say with my hands covering my face. She lays on top of me and says,

“But you love me, remember.”

“Oh my god…” I just squeeze her to me and laugh along with her.

Current Day: August 30th, 2020

I step back out into the room where Dr. Cullen and Sam are waiting for me. I stop and look at them.

“The council decided…” Sam said, I looked up with hopeful eyes…

“They will agree to it, if…” Carlisle started.

“If what?” I say, taking a step forward.

“If she leaves until she can handle being around humans. And…” Sam began,

“She can’t go back to La Push,” Carlisle said. I replayed what they said…. she can change but can’t come back until she’s able to be around humans, but she can’t come back to La Push. I nod my head.

“How long does it usually take for your kind to get better at being around humans?” I ask quietly. Carlisle looked at Sam with guilt and answered.

“It depends on the person's restraint. Within their first year, their blood still runs in their body, so blood lust, especially from humans, is out of control. After a year, it gets better. Although, with our diet, it’s harder but not impossible.”

“But how long in total?” I asked anxiously. He looked at me with genuine sad eyes.

“Up to three years or so.” He said with sorrow in my eyes. For once in the few days I’ve been here, a new emotion that I haven’t touched came out. Rage.

“Three years! I can’t go that long without her! I’m coming with you.” I said to Carlisle. Sam looked at him for an answer. This is the first time I’ve seen him rely on his answers on another person’s answer.

“You can, but there’s no guarantee of anything. Her body may or may not accept the venom. She may or may not remember you. She may have anger towards you about what happened if she remembers what happens. Anything could happen Paul. Is it worth the risk?” without hesitation, I answered.

“Yes.” Sam nodded his head and gave me the okay. Even if he wouldn’t have, I still would have followed them. He knows just as much as anyone that separating imprints from one another is a death sentence.

“We leave tonight. Edward and I will take her to Alaska with some friends of ours. I will administrate the change there. Because you are in no condition to shift, we plan on flying. Medical services will meet us there with her. We have paperwork stating that they are her closes family since she doesn’t have one.” I nodded my head and took a deep breath.

“Thank you. I know this is a reach, but can I ask for one favor.”

“Of course.”

“Can you freeze her eggs.” They looked at me confused and with shock. So, I explained,

“We’ve always talked about having children. She’s always wanted children of her own and to adopt some. I know she wouldn’t care too much about it, but I also know that would make her happy.” I begged the doctor. He sighed and nodded.

“it shouldn’t be a problem, since she’s already under my friends name as family, Eleazar would be okay with it.” I nod my head and look back at my angel.

“Emily, Kim, and Clair will be up here in a few. Go home and rest for tonight Paul. I promise, she’ll be okay. If she’s going to have the procedure, you need to be ready for when it’s over and to head out.” I didn’t argue this time. I walked over to her and kiss her head.

“Don’t leave me, my love. I’ll be here waiting for you. Always.”

My Love (for the series)

Masterlist

[letterstoleia]

Important Lessons Learned from Gabby and Brian

As an author and advocate for survivors of domestic violence, I’ve learned a lot about the predictable patterns of unhealthy relationships. After years of personal experiences, research, and outreach, I’ve learned to recognize the tell-tale signs of abuse. I am not a licensed therapist, social worker, police officer, or minister. So please understand I shared my thoughts as 3 a.m. musings. When a few people asked me to make the post public, I agreed, reluctantly. I had no idea this message would resonate with so many people. I've worked back through the original post to explain a bit better how I'm feeling. I realize not everyone will agree with me, and I respect all opinions and views. All I ask is that we engage in respectful discourse on all sides. Thank you all.

In recent days, the tragic events involving Gabby Petito and Brian Laundrie have given us a lot to learn. This case is still under investigation, and I can only make assumptions based on the textbook patterns of abuse I’ve witnessed too many times to count. I also recognize that multiple families are grieving, and I have tremendous empathy for everyone involved. However, many survivors will resonate with at least some of the following insights, and I’m hoping we can use this tragedy to shift the way we as a culture approach the complicated issue of domestic abuse.

Let’s examine 30 important lessons this couple teaches us:

1. Followers on social media saw a smiling, happy couple, full of love and wanderlust, setting out for a cross-country adventure while documenting all the joys of young life. In many cases, targets become very good at smiling through the pain.

2. When the public was shown body camera footage captured by Moab City Police officer Daniel Robbins, (who pulled Laundrie and Petito over after the 911 call on August 12), some viewers assumed Petito was suffering from mental illness and Laundrie, while nervous, was the steadier of the two.

3. Other viewers assumed both partners were equally at fault—the old “it takes two” myth that doesn’t really apply to most abusive situations.

4. Some people even assumed Petito was the abuser and Laundrie was the victim.

5. These three assumptions probably crossed everyone’s mind as a possibility (they did mine). Healthy minded people tend to give others the benefit of the doubt, especially when someone is being accused of a negative act. Also, we can all understand that mental illness is a difficult situation and can tax even the kindest most gentle of souls (and the people who love them). Unfortunately, in many cases, this thought pattern leads us to assume the victim is mentally ill or that the victim is to blame for an altercation.

6. “Victim blaming” can happen even in the worst cases of abuse because we don’t see the longitudinal story unfolding. What we don’t see is that the target has managed to keep things together until she reached her threshold, at which time we may see her crying, yelling, or breaking down emotionally. By exhibiting those behaviors, many might assume the target is “crazy,” and it’s natural for us to feel as if the more stable person is more trustworthy.

7. If we listen carefully to Laundrie’s conversation with the officers, he even laughs and says, “She’s crazy.” (17.09) Then he dismisses it as a joke. Of course, he’s already put this claim in the officers’ minds (and by the nonchalant way he says it, many might assume it’s not the first time he’s said these words.)

8. So while viewers (and officers) start wondering if perhaps the target is “crazy,” the abuser plays the part of the poor, patient partner who has to deal with this irrational person. In the video, Laundrie mentions Petito’s anxiety and her OCD, painting her as an unstable partner. (Please note: I’m not at all justifying any physical violence against either party. No one should intentionally harm any other person. Period.)

9. A typical abuser would be skilled at convincing people that he’s innocent, while in fact he’s been acting very differently behind closed doors, pushing his target to this point intentionally and feeding on her emotional break. Many abusers LOVE to see evidence that they’ve hurt their target. They LOVE to see their target in pain. For this reason, “breaking” the target is usually the goal from the start. In cases of abuse, it may take an abuser hours, weeks, months, or even years to break the target, but he won’t stop until he gets that reaction, and then he’ll point the finger and say, “See? She’s crazy. I’m just trying to keep her calm.” And then he’ll do it again. And again. And again.

10. As a result, some people will buy into that false narrative. Even the target can be brainwashed to doubt her own truth. Which may be one reason we see Petito making many excuses for Laundrie’s behavior and taking the blame for everything.

11. In contrast, we see Laundrie blaming Petito, insisting he never hit her and saying he was just trying to keep her calm. He’s charming. He comes across as the loving and loyal partner. He’s joking around with the officers and even gives one a fist bump in the end. All the while, his fiancée is at risk of being charged with domestic assault and possibly spending the night in jail.

12. Later, we’ll hear the 911 recording that (it seems) the responding officers were not fully informed of at the time: “I’d like to report a domestic dispute.” The 49 second audio recording continues as the caller says, “The gentleman was slapping the girl.” When the dispatcher asks him to confirm that the man was slapping the girl, the caller responds, “Yes, and then we stopped, they ran up and down the sidewalk, he proceeded to hit her, hopped in the car, and they drove off.”

13. But long before the 911 call was made public, many survivors could already see through the spin playing out on the video footage. They easily recognized the “red flags” because these cycles become the norm for victims of long-standing abuse. Many targets eventually become conditioned to believe everything the abuser does is her fault. Covering for the abuser, accepting all the blame, trying harder to make the abuser happy—this warped reality becomes the only truth a target knows.

14. Also, it seems clear that Petito doesn’t want her fiancé to be in any trouble. She’d rather pay the price and protect the man she loves. And because she probably believes he only acted this way because of her mood/behaviors/anxiety/OCD/job, she doesn’t want him to be blamed. This is also the norm in abusive relationships.

15. Many experienced and well-trained officers see right through this typical pattern. Others buy the cover-up story. And, sadly, because some officers are also abusers, some side with the abuser even when they know exactly what’s going on. Throughout the video, we get the sense that Officer Robbins senses there’s more to the story.

16. I credit the police in Petito’s situation, especially Officer Robbins. The four responding officers (two of whom were park rangers) remained calm, they separated the couple, they interviewed them individually, they split them up for the night, they consulted the domestic violence shelter … many would say they did everything right considering the information they had at the time.

17. I imagine the officers involved may be suffering from tremendous guilt and wondering if they could have prevented Petito’s death, but I want to give credit to the officers in this case. While it’s easy to look back and say maybe they should have handled things differently, knowing what we now know, I was impressed with how well they treated both Laundrie and Petito (and, sadly, I was thinking how rare it is to see that level of respect and professionalism in most cases of domestic violence, particularly in the South where I’ve been most involved with survivors’ stories.)

18. After Petito was reported missing, many people expressed shock in response to the Laundrie family’s refusal to cooperate early in the investigation. Petito reportedly lived with the Laundrie family for more than a year. Anyone can see that this family will do anything to protect their son, even at the cost of an innocent young woman who was a real part of their family and soon to be their daughter-in-law. While most of us can certainly understand parents wanting to protect their son, most would agree they crossed a moral line when his fiancée went missing.

19. But perhaps it goes deeper than that. Perhaps what we’re seeing is a system of enablers who not only allowed their son to abuse Petito (which may have been a factor in her reported anxiety) but also a system of gaslighters who may have always been shifting the truth to keep Petito confused and make her believe she was the problem.

20. It’s not a far stretch to assume Petito was caught in a system of abuse. And once a target is caught in that psychological web, it’s extremely difficult to see a way out. Reality becomes flipped.

21. It’s also worth noting that Petito and Laundrie had been involved in various levels of a relationship since their teens. This is also commonly observed in dysfunctional partnerships.

22. These immature relationships work beautifully when both partners grow together and mature emotionally. But when one wants to keep the other down, naïve, and under his control … and the other is growing, learning, and maturing … it doesn’t work.

23. We hear Petito tell the officer that Laundrie didn’t think she could succeed with her travel blog (3.25). It seems clear that he didn’t believe in her and that he was trying to make her doubt herself.

24. Throughout the conversation, he implies that he locked her out of the van because she wouldn’t calm down. But when we listen to the full video, it seems he was upset because they’d spent too much time at the coffee shop with her working on her website when he wanted to go hiking. This suggests that because she wasn’t in the van when he was ready to leave, he lost his temper.

25. In the moments that followed, the altercation became physical. Reportedly, Laundrie squeezed Petito’s face with his hand, cut her down verbally, and criticized her.

26. Some would argue that this escalating abuse typically persists until the target reacts emotionally and/or physically. If this case follows the norm, Laundrie may have been trying to break her spirit, intentionally.

27. Why? Again, if this case follows the typical situation, it would likely be because Petito’s focus wasn’t 100% on Laundrie. She had found this new job she enjoyed. She was succeeding at it, and it was allowing her to connect with other people. (Remember, she’d already left her job as a nutritionist to travel around the country with Laundrie.)

28. In a healthy relationship, the new job might be considered a positive opportunity for Petito. Especially considering Laundrie admits they have very little money (not even enough to afford a hotel room to prevent his fiancée from going to jail). But in an unhealthy relationship, the abuser wants the target all to himself. And when that doesn’t happen, he can become increasingly violent.

29. Petito now had this one little piece of her life that Laundrie couldn’t control, so if we’re looking at textbook patterns, perhaps her blog angered him. Perhaps he didn’t like all the attention she was getting on social media. Perhaps he punished her for it. And then a cycle developed. Even though she was doing nothing wrong by building a new career.

30. The next thing we know, we have a missing person, a recovered body, a young man on the run, and several families destroyed. Too much grief to measure. And the truth is, it will happen again tomorrow, and the next day, and the next day, until we learn to recognize and respond to abusive situations in healthier ways.

The overall takeaway?

When we see someone at her emotional end during a domestic dispute, we shouldn’t assume she’s crazy. We shouldn’t buy into the false narrative given by the abuser. We shouldn’t believe the cover-up story by the target who has been conditioned to carry all the blame and shame. And we shouldn’t assume they’re going to be okay.

Instead, we should all learn the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships. We should learn to recognize the warning signs of abuse. We should engage in respectful, fact-based conversations about trauma bonds, abusive cycles, and emotional intelligence. We should be familiar with terms like gaslighting, hovering, love bombing, enabling, triangulating, and projecting. We should stop blaming targets and help them reclaim their truth. And we should stop repeating the age-old myths that keep targets trapped in these dangerous and all-too-often deadly cycles.

Finally, while I’ve used the most common scenario of male-on-female violence in this article, we should recognize that abuse crosses all barriers and can impact anyone regardless of gender, sexuality, ethnicity, nationality, religious affiliation, age, or socio-economic level. And we should stop assuming these situations will get better in time. Personally, I haven’t heard of one abusive relationship that became healthier. Not one. Not with therapy. Not with church. Not with prayer or forgiveness or complete surrender. When an abuser is determined to destroy his target, he will not stop until that target is erased from this world or stripped from her life. And in many cases, he’ll walk away without any consequences, often taking the target’s finances, home, vehicle, reputation, or even her children with him.

Please don’t let the next statistic be you or someone you love. For support, contact the Domestic Violence Hotline. From a safe phone, call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or text “START” to 88788.

[epochofbelief]

Breath Control, Chapter Seven

An A Court of Mist and Fury College Swim Team AU

All characters belong to SJ Maas!

Feysand.... and welcome to Elriel. 

Warnings: cursing

Let me know if you want to be tagged! 

Authors Note: This chapter is a BIG gateway chapter to a lot of things. . . also VERY lightly edited... and enjoy the new POV shift... ;)

Masterlist Link!

SEVEN

~~~Elain~~~

It was around 9 am. I’d been in the kitchen for an hour already, trying to decide what to make for breakfast. I’d started making pancakes, then switched to waffles, then omelets.  I’d be set on my decision for as long as it would take me to pull out all the ingredients for my choice, then I’d change my mind, put everything back, and pull a bunch of different things out. 

My father walked in at around 9:30, as I was pulling the muffins I’d made from scratch out of the oven. I’d decided muffins were neutral enough that everyone in the house would like them and that I could make them well enough to everyone’s satisfaction. Nesta said I worked too hard to please people. 

No clue where she got that idea. . . 

“Is no one else up?” my father said.

I shook my head. “Just me and the muffins.”

He took one, buttered it, and made to sit down. He seemed to think better of it, though, because he set his muffin down and stood up straight. “I’d better go wake Feyre. I want to ask her about all those paint cans and supplies she’s left in the garage, and someone has to be here to eat these muffins. Best to do it know while Mr. Night sleeps; I know how sensitive that girl can be about her painting.”

I nodded, standing alone at the counter before I remembered.

“Dad, Dad, Dad! Let me wake up Feyre. I--um--”

He was halfway up the stairs when I caught up to him, pausing to look down at me. I went with the oldest trick in the book. “Girl stuff.” I widened my eyes meaningfully. “Best if I check up on her first.”

I prayed my father didn’t see through my very feeble attempt to make him uncomfortable. But it worked. He clicked his tongue and descended the staircase. “I’ll take your word for it, Elain. Hurry down. And tell Feyre to hurry too…”

It was like he knew. Oh Feyre was so going to owe me. 

I bounded up the stairs, not slowing until I was at the top of Feyre’s own narrow staircase. I knocked and entered, ready to get a kick out of what was about to happen.

“Oh, Feyreeee, Dad needs you downstairs.”

Nothing for a few moments. I thought I heard whispers but from where I stood, I  couldn’t see anything besides the large lump of her white bed coverings. “I guess I could send Dad up here…”

The whispering became clearer, now, and I made out something like, “Shut up!” and “I’ll handle it” and “Calm the fuck down.” 

Feyre suddenly appeared in a very large t-shirt and nothing else. “Thanks, ‘Lain.” She practically hissed my name. She stalked across the floor toward me. “How’d you know?” She murmured.

“Got up for a glass of water last night. Saw Rhysand’s ass as it cleared the top of the staircase. Figured I’d save you from Dad’s wrath.”

Feyre rolled her eyes. “We didn’t do anything. And Dad has no right to dictate what I can and can’t do.”

“Obviously not,” I agreed. “But he could make things very awkward.”

“True. We’ll--I’ll--be down in a second. Please don’t tell Nesta. She’d be unbearable.”

“Tell me what?” A voice like iron floated across the small landing. 

Feyre shut her eyes and I cringed. Nesta’s judgment might be worse than our father’s.

“Hey, Nesta,” Feyre said guiltily. 

“Feyre. Hi Rhys!” Nesta raised her voice imperceptibly. 

A tan hand rose from the bed. “Why the fuck do you have so many sisters, Archeron?”

The light that shone behind Feyre’s eyes was like nothing I’d ever seen before. In either of my sisters’ faces. Or my own. I bit back my own grin. After Tamlin, and the shitty year Feyre had had, I just wanted her to be happy. And Rhys was so good-natured. Didn’t hurt that he was hot, too. She deserved to look all happy despite being caught out by her two older sisters.

“I’d get downstairs quick. And arrive separately.” Nesta was fighting back a laugh. “I can’t wait to hear Dad chew you out for your sex life. For once, it won’t be me.” She smiled wickedly.

“We didn’t--I didn’t--get out!” Feyre screeched at us. 

“You’re welcome,” Nesta and I said in unison, and we grinned at each other. Feyre pushed us out with surprising strength and slammed the door.  

“That was fun.” Nesta started down the staircase first. 

I was about to respond when my phone vibrated in my back pocket. I pulled it out.

Azriel: Mooorning

“Who’s that?”

“Huh?”

“Don’t play dumb.” Nesta dropped her voice to a low whisper as we descended the main staircase and headed for the kitchen. “You’re grinning like an idiot, and not in the ‘I just caught my sister with a boy in her bed in my dad’s house’ way you were earlier.” 

“Uh, just looking at a meme.” Weak.

“Because you spend so much time scrolling through memes.”

Thankfully, Nesta let the subject drop. I honestly wished she hadn’t. Everyone had been treating me like a fragile piece of glass since the whole Greyson debacle. And while, yes, I wasn’t quite ready to share that I’d been secretly talking to Azriel for the past two months… I was strong enough to handle some sisterly teasing, or even fatherly teasing. Or any kind of teasing.

Instead, everything was, “Oh, Elain, your cookies taste so good!” and, “Oh, Elain, the garden looks wonderful!” and, “Oh, Elain, how’s nursing school?” Nobody wanted to talk about anything real with me, because they thought I wasn’t ready. And if I was the one to start down that road, they’d continue to tread on ice around me and just be grateful I was talking at all. Too grateful to really listen to what I had to say.

Which was why I’d downloaded a dating app two months ago, swiped right on all of two guys before I’d found someone worthy of deleting the app immediately after we started messaging. It’d been a constant stream of texting and snapchatting ever since, even if we hadn’t met up in person yet. My romantic past, Azriel’s loner tendencies, and the fact that he was one of Rhys’s best friends and Feyre’s teammate had made us decide to take things slow. But seeing how happy Feyre was with Rhys--and she didn’t even know it quite yet--made me think that I should tell my sister and then get Azriel to take me out. 

That would certainly surprise everybody. Elain made of glass, indeed.

Before I could lose my nerve, I texted Azriel back. Sliding my phone back into my pocket, I reentered the kitchen with a smile on my face, trying not to ponder on the message I’d just sent.

Elain: I’ve been thinking. . . We should meet up… Face to face. 

Elain: Like on a date. 

I got a response within a moment and didn’t need to check my phone to know what it said.

Azriel: Hell yes. 

~~~FEYRE~~~

I slammed the door shut. I looked behind me to find Rhys, breathtakingly shirtless, propped up on one elbow behind me. 

“What are the chances that both of your lovely sisters keep their mouths shut about this? Cuz I have a feeling even a mutual love for collegiate athletics won’t stop your father from kicking me out of the house for staying the night in your room.”

I slumped onto the bed and he was suddenly there, filling all the empty space in the room as he hovered over me. I closed my eyes, fighting back a smile. “They’ve had their fun. Sisters don’t snitch.”

He rested his forehead against my shoulder. “Great. Not that I care about you, of course. I’m just very concerned about where I’ll have Thanksgiving dinner if your dad kicks me out.”

I sat up and pushed him back against the blankets all in one motion. “You take that back,” I said playfully. 

“Make me.”

“How about I go down there and confess to my dad before Nesta or Elain can rat us out? Then I’d be rid of your sorry ass much more quickly.”

“Feyre!” Elain’s voice floated up the stairs tauntingly, interrupting our flirting.

“This isn’t over, Archeron,” Rhys said threateningly. 

I pointed to the door. “Go put on something presentable. Your hair’s a mess.” 

He scowled. But he kissed me lightly on the lips before he left the room and I almost told him to forget about family breakfast and stay up here with me, instead.

------

The day passed in a blur. We spent the majority of it in the kitchen prepping for Thanksgiving lunch tomorrow afternoon. After a while, we all retired to the living room and marathoned the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Rhys sat next to me on the couch and as soon as it got dark enough outside that my father, Nesta, and Elain probably wouldn’t notice, he took my hand under our shared blanket and I set my head on his shoulder. 

I stayed in his room that night, although we were both too tired to do much other than fall into bed after a day spent in the kitchen. I woke before him the next morning and tiptoed downstairs to let him sleep.

I found Elain and Nesta arguing in my kitchen. 

“Why don’t you just tell me who he is,” Nesta was saying in a very low, very dangerous voice.

“Butt out, Nesta. It’s no one.”

“If it was no one, there’d be nothing for me to butt out of, now would there be?”

Elain was gripping the island countertop in the center of the kitchen. Nesta, surprisingly, was cooking up a huge skillet of scrambled eggs. It smelled as though they were starting to burn while her attention was focused on Elain. 

Elain’s phone vibrated. “Who is he?” Nesta shrieked.

“Fuck off!”

“What’s going on?” I asked. 

They both started speaking at once. 

“Elain’s being stupid--”

“Nesta won’t stay out of my own fucking business--”

“Help me convince her--” 

I held up my hands. “Oh, both of you shut up! Elain. Explain.”

Nesta mumbled something under her breath that I chose not to hear as Elain sighed. “Nesta thinks I’m talking to a boy. She thinks that she has a right to know who he is--if he even exists,” Elain added with an eye roll, “and that she deserves the right to approve. I told her to fuck off, but she’s not listening.”

I’d never heard so many “fucks” from Elain in one conversation. There was definitely a boy. 

“Well, why don’t you tell us? After everything…”

Elain pushed herself back from the countertop, throwing her hands up in the air. “I’m not some fragile teenager who doesn’t know how to speak to boys! Despite what you think about how terribly broken I am after Greyson, I know what I’m doing! And now I don’t want to tell you even more. So leave me alone.” 

She turned and pushed through the door that led from the kitchen to the side yard. 

I looked at Nesta. She looked at me. 

“She better be getting it reallll good to get so upset with us for asking about it,” Nesta said.

I took a seat at the barstools surrounding the island. “Do you think she. . . Do we really treat her like a teenager who doesn’t know how to speak to boys?”

“Maybe. But that’s because she doesn’t know how to speak to boys--or men, for that matter.”

Nesta thought she knew what was best for Elain--and she usually did. But Nesta also liked getting her way. When her way wasn’t Elain’s way. . . It was difficult for both of them. I resolved that no matter what Nesta thought, I’d try to give Elain some space when it came to her Mystery Guy. Even if I was dying to find out who it was. 

“Speaking of boys. . .” Nesta began, but at that moment, Rhys stepped into the kitchen. Thank God. I didn’t know what exactly was going on between us at the moment. Discussing it with Nesta would be torture. 

“Good morning,” I said brightly as Rhys took a seat beside me. 

“Is it?” He asked. Nesta had turned around to find her eggs burnt to a crisp, ignoring Rhys entirely.

“What’s wrong?”

Rhys leaned his elbows on the counter. “My father called. He’s in town. And wants me to spend the weekend with him in my hometown.”

I couldn’t help the fear that gripped me at his words. Was he just making this up because he wanted to escape me? I struggled to keep my voice steady. “Where’s that?” 

“Two hours north of here.”

“Well I can take you and drop you off tomorrow morning,” I managed to say. “Would that work?”

He blinked. “I did tell you that my father is a horrible person, right?”

“Not sure you mentioned it. . . But it’s Thanksgiving. You should be with family.” Which was true. Although I’d rather he stay here.

He rolled his eyes. “I can’t burden you with driving all the way out there and back just so I can spend the weekend with a very unideal candidate.” He gave me a look that told me who was the ideal candidate. Maybe he wasn’t making this up. . . 

“Um. . . Uber?”  Stay here, stay here, stay here.

“Too expensive.” He glanced at Nesta, and then turned to face me more fully. “You could stay with us. We can just make it ‘meet the parents’ week.” He smiled hopefully.

Relief flooded my body. “Well…” I definitely wanted to go with him. Right now I didn’t want to leave his side at all after the past two nights sleeping in his arms. But I didn’t want to offend my family.

Nesta banged the skillet against the edge of the trash can, causing both Rhys and me to jump about a mile. “Go with him, Feyre. I’ll talk to Dad.”

I couldn’t help the smile that exploded across my face. “I guess you’re stuck with me.” I grinned at him. 

“There’s no one else I’d rather be stuck with.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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