#don’t bind like this irl

[marsberryart]

kisses :]

[phleb0tomist]

people love telling me not to isolate myself when I’m having a crisis- reach out, don’t hide, etc- and while that’s a lovely sentiment, a lot of people don’t seem to understand what it entails in practice? like they truly don’t seem to have considered that me being open during my mental health crisis will mean them actually Seeing and Hearing small parts of that crisis.

“don’t hide yourself” seems to come with a secret caveat of “but don’t be unpalatable either”. often my openness leads not to support but to an ethics debate about whether it was condemnable of me to let my struggle be slightly visible. interesting. when i wear short sleeves or make casual mention of the long-term aftermath of my self injury, it’s somehow perceived as me saying “self injury is awesome! i think the whole world should do it!” instead of being perceived as me living exactly as i always have, just hiding a little less, bringing you into my world a tiny bit, like you asked. healed scars are the only ones i allow to be seen, i cover up healing injuries and i don’t talk about methods or anything overly specific or sensational. i openly discuss harm reduction measures & therapeutic strategies. but somehow ppl still disapprove of the snippets they see when i reach out.

if you want people to reach out during crisis you have to accept that theres no way for a person to make themselves palatable while theyre showing you their severe mental illness lmao. they’re not going to provide you constant caveats while sharing their feelings like “ive been having trouble coping so i fell back on self injury. but i don’t condone it! YOU shouldn’t do it and I condemn myself for having done it btw! I will never forgive myself for this expression of mental illness, i’m so sorry I revealed it to you.”

this post might be a vent I can’t rly tell. open to conversation if anyone has any similar experiences 👍

[raeathnos]

.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hi sex witch! This isn’t exactly a sex Ed question but it is related to sex. I’m aro/ace, and I’ve noticed that a lot of other aro/aces say that allos see friendship as a stepping stone to sex or romance, and less important than romantic relationships. I guess it makes sense, but my best friend irl is a gay boy (im a girl) and he obviously isn’t interested in dating an aro/ace girl. I made a post saying this and people in the notes were saying that he’s either secretly bi and lying to make me feel safe, or I’m an egg. I don’t believe either of those things but it got me wondering, is it common for allos to use friendship as a way to get close to people for the purpose of dating or having sex with them? Personally I’ve never experienced that but enough aro/aces are saying it that I have to wonder

hi anon,

okay so we need to start with the part about your best friend, because it's really important to me that we take a minute to recognize anyone trying to convince you that a gay boy is only hanging out with you because he has secret romantic feelings is being a homophobe. I mean, listen, it's annoying and childish when people act like men and women can't be friends in general, okay? but in this case they're not just being heteronormative, they're being actively homophobic. block anyone who said that. jesus christ.

secondly: I don't know if you've ever, like, spent time with people, but yes, many folks find romantic partners amongst their circles of friends because that's who they spend a lot of time with and build meaningful connections with, which can develop into feelings of sexual or romantic attraction for people who experience those things. I'd say it's less often a a case of anyone "using" friendship as a means to an end and more often a case of people realizing that a friendship is taking an exciting new direction and deciding to pursue those feelings.

there's a long-lasting trope, especially prominent it sitcoms and romcoms, of someone (usually a sleezy man) acting friendly to get close to someone else (usually a woman) with the intent of seducing them, but a.) like most works of fiction, that's much less common in real life, and b.) there's a huge difference between lying to someone intentionally and just developing a crush on someone you already know and like, which I think is the MUCH more common scenario.

like, don't get me wrong here, it's absolutely true that we live in a society(TM) that pretty materially privileges romantic relationships - specifically monogamous, legally-binding relationships - over other types of relations, and that's a fucking doozy. that's a thing to work on, for sure. but it's also not weird or creepy that some people couple up with their buddies.

[sepublic]

The Rapture, the Day of Unity, and Happily Ever After

I wouldn’t be surprised if the upper echelons of the coven regime weren’t concerned with being sustainable, because they were privy before the public was to the Day of Unity, which was itself essentially one big rapture where everyone goes to a perfect utopia! They don’t have to worry about the world they’ve left behind, they just need to last long enough to make it to this endpoint, like Belos talking about how he only needs to ‘live long enough to see this through’.

So it must’ve been quite a shock, realizing that’s not it; There’s nothing for all their hard work. They have to go back to their lives as normal, but knowing it’s eternal in the sense of worrying about living life until it naturally ends for them, and making society run ahead of them for the next to pick up. Now people have to do their jobs in creating an actual functioning society instead of loftily dreaming of a fantasy, which is of course topical to the show’s themes about being beholden to the world and people around you as you make dreams practical.

I can see a comparison between the apathy that came from the Day of Unity and how a lot of rich, powerful folk —especially the ones running fossil fuel companies— don’t care about destroying the Earth and its environment, because they’ll be dead before it gets bad enough that the devastation reaches them in their cushy little suites. On the Day of Unity, Emira’s frustrations over her mother only caring about money feel in a similar vein, it all hearkens back to the same problem with these CEOs where their personal, material enjoyment is the only priority.

And this makes me think of the rapture comparison too; It comes from the Evangelicals, who are the descendants of the Puritans. I can see the writers playing with how Marx called religion the opiate of the masses; The idea that Christianity was often exploited by the upper class against the lower class to justify their suffering. The idea was that if you were poor, you didn’t need to worry about improving your material world because as long as you remained pious and faithful, you’d eventually inherit a heavenly afterlife.

Thus, working-class Christians were made complacent, believing their mortal suffering was just temporary and even a test for their ascension. Whether you think they actually got a heavenly afterlife is an entirely separate real-life theological discussion, but the point was that it was an excuse by those in power to avoid being held accountable in making the living world actually tolerable for everyone else, and everyone else would not hold them to that standard because they thought it didn’t matter anyway.

So I can see the Day of Unity functioning exactly like that, in fact I’m pretty sure it just did onscreen because we see wild witches such as the Demon Hunters accept the coven bindings because for whatever losses they suffer, eventually the Titan will make it all worth it right? And this framing of the Titan as an abstract God who will take you to an abstract universe is interesting; We know tangibly that other worlds exist of course, but in the context of the show, the utopia bit is a lie.

And if we apply it to real life, much how the show calls out IRL witch hunters (and its fictional one, because TOH’s fictional witches warranted nothing for their existence) as insincere… I do remember a college lecture in things like Animism or cosmocentric belief systems; They saw the ‘spirits’ as not existing on a separate plane, but our own. There was no afterlife or heaven, it was all in this world, people live on when they die and break down and are consumed by other beings, that sort of thing.

The practices of wild magic and the worship of the Titan seem to follow in a similar vein to these and Animism; The Titan is sacred and her body has its own life reborn as the environment, but she’s also undeniably dead, as pointed out by a Deadwardian witch. Eda stresses learning from the natural environment around you for magic, their ‘god’ is a mortal being and also their tangible world. The magic comes via glyphs in nature, as well as the magic in everything that witches get their own magic from. There IS something resembling an afterlife in-universe but we never get to see it, the beliefs of wild magic seem to be at odds with Belos’ Christian colonialism, and again its promise of a rapture and a separate, abstract God and utopia.

Point is; There is no universe after this, or at least that’s not how wild witches treat it. The focus is on the here and now and making this world last, and making it last for the future generations that will take your place. And this defiance of a rapture in favor of life always going on makes me think of how Dana hates the term Happily Ever After, for the implications of everything just being over and that’s it. That’s the end. All the problems are solved now, there is no story left to tell.

I can’t say this was intentional on a conscious level or otherwise, but I do have to draw a connection between this and how TOH’s ending was in response to this critique; Life keeps going on, the protagonists have to keep fixing the Boiling Isles, and then keep it going even if it IS fixed. They just undid coven bindings and King found his first glyph. The Archivists are still out there. The protagonists don’t get an eternal unambiguous happy ending where there’s nothing left to do, they don’t get a ‘heavenly afterlife’ as one could call it, and that’s good!

From a meta standpoint, you can see how it encourages fans to write more stories, to be inspired to keep it going, and it’s another way Dana made the shortening work in the show’s favor. Dana said back in 2020 that she encourages fans to build off of things, as she did as a kid with her own shows, she also wanted it to be that deep growing up! So both in-universe and IRL, TOH isn’t meant to be over, there is no absolute ending because fandom lives on.

Hell, Dana even professed interest in a prequel following Eda’s childhood; She’s since become pessimistic about the possibility, more than likely on account of her cutting ties with Disney and executives’ disinterest. But the point still stands; Life keeps going, IRL. The lives of the characters keep going, in-universe and IRL through fandom.

I also wonder if you could discuss Lumity under this lens; I’m making exceptions for queer romances, especially in children’s media, because they often have to deal with censorship pushing them to the last minute. But when it comes to romance in general, romance involving the main character largely consists of Will They/Won’t They, with the climax having the romance achieved. But because of the Thrill of the Chase, a lot of writers don’t want to explore how characters actually navigate a relationship, hence why it’s drawn out and saved for the ending; The romance has been nearly tied up as a Happily Ever After, there’s no more story to tell. So when they get a continuation, they’ll often undo progress.

Lumity avoids this; Lumity has them get together at the halfway point of the series, and then actually explores their dynamic as a couple together, without creating misunderstandings or breakups or anything. We see how they work as a couple, how they get to enjoy each other as a couple. So them getting together isn’t the ending climax, it’s just another stage in their continuing dynamic. There is no Happily Ever After; There’s problems for them to face together that do sometimes strain their relationship, but they still work on it together; Dana was adamant on showing these things instead of settling for them asking each other out and letting the rest be an implication.

And I think that’s so much more healthy to show kids than just idealizing the Thrill of the Chase and its climax, without appreciating the mundanity of just being together. Because kids grow into adults and don’t really expect or care to pursue a romance past that point, and I wonder if this is part of the culture behind cheating, of still reaching for something unattainable because media doesn’t normalize already having things when it comes to romance. Nor does it care for tackling things together as a couple most of the time.

Dana was raised Catholic, which is separate from Puritanism, but she did have to deal with Evangelicals growing up, as they raged about innocuous things like Pokemon; And Pokemon was her Good Witch Azura, a last gift from her father before he died in a car crash. It’s something Dana still enjoys and she’s done crossover art for it and TOH.

So I can see the coincidence/connection in Dana critiquing Evangelicals’ rapture ideology and how the end of everything is used to placate people instead of worrying about what needs to be eternally maintained, and like. Her feeling similarly with stories and even romances where it ends definitively and perfectly. Because fandom keeps going and she’s a part of it too.

The world keeps going, there is no endpoint to history IRL or in the show; People have to adjust going back to the banality of continuing to live and worry about running society in the long-term, rather than expecting it to not matter because they were going to be raptured anyway. And you know what, this could be good, it means it lasts forever as we see Luz and co. embrace it, happy to enjoy their lives, actually getting to be in a relationship; But life is fragile as we see with the Titan, so we gotta work to keep it going, so that even when we get our definitive end, the people after get their time.

[littlemissayu]

Wht Songs Would Play in Your Rom-Com? Pt2

A/N: Hey Loves!! I'm posting pt2, surprisingly I actually posted on the day I scheduled myself to post so that's great!! I hope you enjoy pt2 and it is as good as pt1. And PLEASE leave some feedback it is very helpful!!

pt1

Parings: Pomefiore, Idia Shorud, Diasomnia x reader(seperate/romantic)

Love Grows(Where My Rosemary Goes) by Edison Lighthouse

If you read the lyrics or have listened to the song this is obviously the song that plays as he slowly falls for you. This also most likely opposites attract kind of trope. Js imagine how cute it would be to see Vil fall hard for someone who is almost nothing like him and as much as some of the things you do he may prefer to stay far away from, still he’ll think it's cute because it’s you.

Sincerely Yours by Zenglen

If you have seen some of my prior content you might recognize this song as the inspiration for on of my post. Now part of this may be my haitian culture influencing my opinion but cmon, you can’t see Rook and his love dancing in the living room, yk like that first time moving in kinda of dance when you two are just super sickly in love.(that or Until I Found You by Stephen Sanchez)

Late Night Talking by Harry Styles

I might be reaching but just think about the possibility of you guys having your “thing” be just staying up late talking to each other despite how sleepy you are. And maybe you two work out your conflict by one of you coming over at night to talk out your problem together js like all the other times you guys have random conversations to the point its js a normal thin gyou teo do.

Video Game Lover by Narraws Music

Now this feels a bit{a lot} on the nose BUT your telling me you don’t wanna see Idia’s rom-com becoming good friends with you through a common game you two play but rarely talk to each other irl, not even knowing who the person is behind the screen. You guys just vent to each other through the chat an you guys are just binding til you say something ridiculously familiar and so he recognizes you from that and he’s too nervous to approach you irl, how the issue is solved is all up to you my loves. 

Can’t Help Falling In Love by Elivs Presely

This is obviously a human-fae love between you two. Are you kidding me, that title is “Cant help falling in love” hinting at the complexity of your relationship as a human lifespan is considerably shorter than a fae’s so he’ll have to live a large chunk of his life without you. Not to mention that Malleus is bound to be king of Briar Valley which the faeries of Briar Valley may not be too overjoyed at the fact their king is with a human.

But you two just cant help but fall for each other and this song plays as you two are out dancing together in the dark, relishing the relationship that you two might not be able to have for long.

Viva La Vida by Coldplay

Despite this not being a love song it is pretty similar to Lilia’s story and so just imagine this playing during like your first truly swoon worthy kiss. But not only during the kiss, the instrumental can lightly play in the background in either the learning of his backstory OR during that first moment you meet. Maybe even when he first falls in love with you.

Bam Bam by Camilla Cabello and Ed Sheeran

Fell first(you) and fell harder(Silver). You fell first obviously bc he’s constantly asleep so it’d make more sense for you to fall first. And when you fall for him you begin to do things to help him out, some are smaller things like adjusting his head so his neck doesn’t hurt or bigger things like putting a pillow beneath his head(wheter thats one of your body parts or an actually pillow is up to you). Those little things add up and he notices and slowly you creep into his thoughts and dreams and now one of the only things he sees in his sleep is you. Convinced that its one of those tropes where you say you love him while you think he’s asleep and you think he doesn’t hear and he doesnt like you back, but he just hasn’t been able to find a way to tell you as their are many plot thrown in issues that get in his way.

That’s How You Know by Amy Adams

I’m very well aware this is another Disney song BUT, think about Sebek with a stereotypical Disney Princess who just belts into song whenever, and she’s not really singing to him but giving other guys advice on how to treat their loves and he just ends up finding himself admiring the fact your giving these random guys advice all the while not realizing that the seeds of his love for you were being sewed.

A/N: Well I finally got pt2 out!! Lmk your thought and opinions not only on this post(+the last one) but some other things that are similar(other ideas for post). Ik i haven’t responded to anything in my inbox in a while but i promise I’ll do my best to get to them I js have many other things on my plate as well

Pomefiore Masterlist

Ignihyde Masterlist

Diasomnia Masterlist

TWST Masterlist

Grand Masterlist

[cherry-writes-yanderes]

Can I request yandere ghost plz?

Soft Yandere Ghost Headcanons

(gn! reader | SFW)

a/n: don’t worry, a nsfw piece is in the works~

cw: mention of kidnapping, bondage (sfw), physical assault, drugging w/ a needle, blood, v domestic

I’m all for the “growly, rough Ghost where he throws you on the bed” type yandere stuff, but we gotta admit to ourselves that he is so soft after you’ve been with him awhile

He’s only rough with you because you’re fussy, and when the drugs kick in you see past that, he’s very domestic and gentle with you

He hates hurting you, but he will if provoked

So don’t piss him off.

Anyways-

As soon as you’re more relaxed, he’ll take you from his bed and into the living room to lay on the couch while he does… anything really

He secretly likes showing off his cleaning skills to you, how good he cooks and how comfy he can make you feel

He wants you to feel at home, especially after the first few days and how tough it was for the both of you

He’s still not all that animated and smiley with you, of course, but he’s surprisingly soft and gentle

Simon will lay you on the couch and turn on the television, letting your legs rest in his lap as he rubs your thighs

He cannot keep his hands off of you istg

And not even in a sexual way, he just needs to be touching you at all times

If he isn’t, then he’s cleaning or making you food, that’s it

One day very early on, he felt really bad all night because you had been really wiggly, trying your absolute best to get away from him despite the duct tape binding your limbs together

He got frustrated and had to knock you out by force, and the guilt settled in his chest right after

Especially with the blood on his knuckles from your nose as a reminder

The day after, he brought you out to the couch with the utmost care, cradling your head and giving you a pillow to lay on

To top it off, he squeezed in behind you, nuzzling his face into your neck

One thing about Ghost that I stand by is the fact that it will be a VERY LONG TIME until you actually see his face

He holds the sentiment that taking his mask off is a sign that he trusts you fully, and you’re just not at that point yet :(

But don’t worry, he has a solution!

He covers your eyes with his hand, slipping his mask off to press a kiss to your shoulder

He wants to kiss you, and it’s not the same to do it through his mask, so this was the next best thing

He loves to trail kisses from your forehead to your collarbone, whispering deep, loving things into your ear as a sort of comfort

“Y’so pretty, love… Mm… ya smell nice too…”

He tries his best to compliment you, although you can tell he’s not entirely sure how

He hopes that you’ll come around soon, but until then, he still hides his face like with everyone else

Ghost still loves you though, he always will <3

~i do not condone yandere behavior irl~

[its-crowning]

Found out I got pregnant on accident today, have been jumping between breaking down crying and scared and cumming hard to your stories, knowing it's going to be me soon. I'm passing as a guy but not for long, this baby is gonna wreck everything for me and I never thought that would turn me on so much. I don't even know who the dad is. I'm so excited to have my life fall apart and watch my body betray me to grow a baby I don't want.

I'm already planning to hide it the whole time as long as possible, and give birth unassisted at home. You literally might be the only person I tell that I'm pregnant, if everything goes well. I don't want anybody to ever know I screamed out some jerk's brat and abandoned it at a shelter. I just want to carry this thing until it's due, give birth, and go back to my life like it never happened. But I had to tell someone, and admit how much I hate this, but love it at the same time.

(anon, for the sake of horny i’m going to assume this is rp. if this is true, please consider at least getting some medical help, even if just at the birth. my stories/posts are horny fictions and are not to be replicated irl if you can help it. if you need abortion resources, i’d be happy to try and help you find them, too.)

now that i’ve recused myself of responsibility…

I understand the impulse to get bred by randoms. But you’ve marked yourself as a slut…hide it though you may try, your belly will swell and round out with life. it’ll settle in your hips. you might bind the belly, or wear layers, or slouch to try and hide your spherical gut, but your burdened waddle will give you away. any reaction you have to the baby’s movement will give you away. there will be at least one passerby that knows what’s become of you. man though you might look, there’s only so round you can get before it stops being passable as a beer belly. before everyone knows the truth—you’re going to have a baby.

you know it too. the weight seems to increase day by day. you’ll never be able to not think about what has been done to you—and you don’t even know who to blame. whose cumshot it was that led to this thing kicking you from the inside.

i can only imagine the dread you’ll feel as you enter labor. scared and alone, not wanting the baby, just wanting to go out and enjoy life like everyone else, without heavy, hard-headed consequences stretching out your genitals. but you won’t be able to—you’re paying the price for letting those men inside you. birthing one of their bastards like a broodmare.

and god knows you won’t learn your lesson. i imagine you’ll find yourself swelling again within the year.

[ifyoucandaniel]

A Collision of Masks by movaz and art by @02png and endpapers by @huedmmi 🎭

i always forget i’m allowed to post projects on here before instagram if i don’t want to spoil the surprise because my IRL friends don’t follow this account :) so this is something i made for my best friend who’s only really watched half of young justice season one and only knows about the batkids because of my extensive over sharing and inability to stfu <3

the covers were supposed to kinda align and be like the two sides of his identity, one with the mask and one just dick, but when they’re actually aligned the spine is so thick it throws the perception off ;-; i still like the idea though. and you know i had to pose the book with all my art from 02png, i just bought more too so i can’t wait to get frames for them all. the bind would not be complete without their incredible art being the inspiration!! and thank you again to both @02png and @huedmmi for allowing me to use your art in this project!! 🖤🖤

anyways this fic is 100/10 if you’re looking for a dick centric fic (could he not have be named anything else oh my god) where young justice is trying to recruit nightwing while living next door to dick grayson with a side of dick being the best big brother ever and just overall being the loml, this is for you.

this fic really scratched an itch in my mind!! i’d been looking for a dick focused long fic for awhile and this really just delivered on all fronts. please give it a read and lmk what you think!!

[pokemon-ash-aus]

I don’t know why but I can’t get the idea out of my head of a trainer hugging a Mimikyu so tightly they end up breaking the disguise by accident (their own Mimikyu, to lessen the damage)

Might be a thing I’d do if I had one irl

Okay so technically that IS possible.

Mimikyu's disguise drops when hit with a physical attack

And you know ... Technically you use your arms to sqyreze the target u.u

You used Bind on your Mimikyu XD how could you break their trusr like that!

Tbh i think Mimikyu is a Pokemom that would (eventually) understand and be content with refixing it's disguise over and over if it means getting the love and care they want. A million disguise breaks wouldn't deter them from getting huggies.

I will say, i imagine the first time it happens it's like stepping on your dog's foot by accident ToT

[slic3dbr3ad]

Let’s say hypothetically -because you’d never let me do this irl- I tie you up so you’re helpless to move or escape what I’m about to do to you. You love the idea of me using you for my own pleasure so you’re obedient the whole time, letting me bind you tightly. You’re such a dumb puppy I can’t believe you really trust me, you’re excited even. You have no idea what I have in store for you. You’re uncomfortable but the point of being tied up has nothing to do with your comfort; you’ve accepted that… Now that I have you right where I want you I tease your dick with my mouth for a little until you’re hard and visibly needy for me to do more.. So i spit on my hand and rub the saliva on my strap before I force it inside you, not caring about how you’re wincing in pain and begging me to be more gentle. I don’t want to be gentle this time, I’ve been gentle to you. This time you’re my toy and I’m taking full advantage of you until I’m satisfied. I won’t be happy until you’re a bloody, sobbing mess. I’ll only know I’ve done enough when you’ve lost all hope of getting out of this experience alive -of course I’m not really going to kill you- I just need to pound into you relentlessly until you subconsciously tap out from the pain and from there I’ll reach for my blade. It’s small but sharp and I’m obsessed with how it feels in my hand but even better how it cuts into your soft flesh. When I’m finally done using you like a fleshlight, you’re laying there panting, trying to take the time that you have to recover. You’re so cute. Your eyes open a little bit and you notice the blade in my hand and it registers with you what’s abt to happen so you start squirming helplessly. I want clean deep cuts when I do this so I grab your legs, pin them down and sit on top of them. Usually that’s not enough to get you to cooperate tho so I blind fold you and press the blade up against your throat and I lean in next to your ear. “The more you squirm the more likely I am to slip up and actually kill you. You don’t want that. I don’t even want that. So stay still like the braindead doll you’re meant to be.” Underneath the blindfold, a few tears stream down your cheeks. I wipe them away and lick them off my thumb and give you a lighthearted kiss right before I start slicing into you all over your body. You’re bleeding so beautifully and screaming in pain, trying your best not to squirm but doing a bad job. So I slap you and remind you how dangerous it is to squirm in this situation. I care about you. I love you. I would never want to put you in danger. Of course I hurt you but I hurt you lovingly and carefully. And when I’m done hurting you I reward you for taking the pain so well. But you won’t be rewarded if you can’t stay still and take it how you’re supposed to. I figure you might feel better if you have something to bite on to distract you from squirming so I stuff a shirt into your mouth and punch you just as another repercussion for not listening to me the first time and I continue to cut up your entire torso, moving to your thighs and select a few areas on your arms as well. God you’re so fucking gorgeous covered in blood as more is dripping out of every fresh cut I’ve left on your body. I just have to lick it up. I get a little carried away and bite your neck so hard I could almost feel the skin ripping away if I had just gone a little further with it. You screamed louder than I’ve ever heard you scream before and spit the shirt out of your mouth. And start squirming aggressively to get me away from you and I’m done cutting you now so I just back off and let you squirm until you realize that that actually makes the cuts sting more so eventually you stop. I give you a few seconds to cool down from all that. Good girl. Unfortunately for you I’m still not satisfied yet. So I watch you lay there, kinda flinchy but dosing off and once you let your guard back down I light a candle -romantic right- and pour the melting wax all over your bleeding back. You jump awake, screaming and thrashing again so I grab you, spit in your face and throw you down.

[viridian-rat]

((OOC: Is that art of the Pikachu traditional, or is it digital but meant to look like it’s traditional? If it’s the latter then, from one traditional artist to another, please tell me how you got the picture quality to be so good.))

// Hihi! Always willing to help a fellow artist out!

For the first question, it’s a traditional watercolor piece! With this blog I’m always trying to emulate Sugimori’s gen 1 art style, so I try to use watercolors for the blog whenever I can! I’ve tried doing the digital watercolor made to look traditional before but it just. never really comes out the way I want it? Genuinely its just easier for me to bust out the ol’ watercolors n do that shit irl. I’ll get to those materials in a sec, actually!

For the second question, tbh all I did for the picture quality was take a top-down with my phone and crop it? I CAN tell you that it’s better to take a picture at x1 rather than try to zoom in, as the camera quality dips significantly if you try to zoom in or out.

Here’s the full picture I took. I just cropped it afterwards.

Other tips I can give for picture quality is uhhh

Make sure your area is well-lit! Phone cameras will automatically try to compensate for dimly lit areas by increasing the ISO, which adds visual noise and dips the quality.

Hold the camera still. A moving camera creates blur. Cool for abstract photography, not so much for capturing traditional art lmao

Clean the lens. If you notice that your photos seem a bit fuzzy and… heaven-like? Might be a sign your lens is hella smudged. Run a cloth over that thang.

Try to take the photo from a top-down view! Taking the photo from an angle distorts the art. I know iPhone has a fuckinnnnn feature to fix angle distortions but I’m gonna be so fr w/ you I wouldn’t rely on it to solve this issue.

Be careful not to cast a shadow with you or your phone. If you are, don’t be afraid to take a step back! Remember that you can always crop it later! Crop, not zoom!

And as for the materials! uhhh hold on lemme grab the fucjin.

The watercolors are this Artistro watercolor paint set I got on Amazon. A fellow art student recommended these to me and tbh I love using them when I can. It comes with a watercolor brush that has a water compartment in the brush itself, which is really fuckin neat tbh.

The pens are your standard Micron pens that most traditional artists like to use. The ones I used in the art itself are raised slightly. Don’t mind the dirt or whatever on them, the heat melted the rubber band I used to bind them together and got stuck on ‘em :/

Something to take note of with watercolors is the kind of paper you’re using for it! Different papers will grab onto watercolors differently— you’ll want more thicker, more porous/rougher paper for watercolors. Smoother and thinner paper is harder for the paint to soak into— you risk the paint running or taking longer to dry, or oversoaking and tearing the paper.

If you don’t feel like going hunting for dedicated watercolor paper (aka me), then a safe bet is to use mixed media paper! There’s tons of sketchbooks in fuckin uhhh Walmart or whatever that will say “Mixed Media” on them. Those are always a safe shot since they’re fairly porous and thick.

I’m down to answer any more questions you may have on @turtblurts-pkmnirl-hub!

[dunmertitty]

not including ops irl cause they’re a teenager but like. can yall stop acting like it’s edgy and cool to purposely bind in a way that harms you.

one day you’ll love yourself and your trans body. and you’ll look back on your younger self punishing you for just existing as sad and pitiful. you don’t need to punish yourself for being trans. give yourself a break.

and obviously you don’t have to do what i say - do what you want with your own body. but don’t act like it’s suave and cool thing to do especially around younger dudes. they’re gonna see you as a leader or a big brother and copy what you do. this isn’t 2012 self harm instagram where we’re all taking pictures of our cuts and comparing how depressed we are by how depressed we Look. you’re not edgy and cool for treating yourself like shit. do better or keep quiet to younger folks so they don’t copy you

[dustorangeheartssnow]

autism is real so this isnt about that but One reason people are increasingly skeptical of autism diagnoses and autism AS a diagnosis is that over the past 15 years literally ANYONE who is the combined package of even vaguely smart, intellectually upright, and very awkward—or even just undersocialized from childhood shyness/aloneness, and so didnt develop the exactly correctly calibrated instincts for social interactions—and who has ANY kind of firm binding metaphysical or third-circuit outlook that isn’t the Current Thing has gotten REPEATEDLY and relentlessly coded as autistic and called autistic—and NOT in the pejorative 2000s vidya-game way in which people used to be called “autistic,” but warmly and affectionately and indulgently, and sometimes quietly and privately, identified as so by clearly well-meaning good “normie” people who are eager to put to real-world-application all the psych terms and identities they learned as “good allies.” But being smart yet awkward used to be just being smart yet awkward, and there is nothing inherently disordered about that, and that ALONE in itself is certainly not autism, but now the diagnosis is deterritorialized so it’s just all these things, even seemingly just the faintest tinges of just one of two of these things. And also part of it is just the label desperation to have like something to call ur human condition but it’s just hard to imagine a more sterile term for like explaining why you feel different from everybody else. But so if everyone is telling you this thing for all of your life, or at least, say, the last 15 years, of course you will think, “Well, how could everybody who independently came to this conclusion about me be wrong; the simplest explanation with the fewest assumptions would be that I, my one-person me, am WRONG and they are RIGHT because of their numbers because it would be pretty crazy if that were not the case.” Pretty crazy! But true. Our day-to-day IRL social calibration for detecting autism is just pretty much Type I errors all the way down. But there are people who ARE autistic but also frankly, there is only a very limited number of Type II errors in diagnosis past a certain age so maybe you do have autism and maybe you don’t but if you’re basing it off what regular degular people in your life have said to you, be aware that they are not correctly calibrated for actually detecting that; it’s like when fishing nets catch fish they’re not supposed to by accident (although they catch fish also that they are meant to catach) and anyway people see that and they become skeptical of the whole autism endeavor because they’ve been misidentified as a false positive but there are true positives and there IS in Autism “a there there.”

[higgity-diggity-dummy]

These Strings That Bind Us

first chapter; previous chapter

So this is the first chapter of this fic that I’ve posted since a few of my irl friends have started following me and now they get to see the crazed fanfiction maniac I am and I don’t know if they’re ready.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

chapter 3:

Nico scanned the room he was left in. He knew logically that he was safe. That he was allowed to be… gay. And that the people that just overheard his conversation with Percy likely didn’t hate him for it.

They probably do hate you though. Even you can’t like yourself.

He just… didn’t like that knowledge to be floating around. 

It was then, after observing all the sleeping and uninterested patients that he saw the face of a particular blonde peering through a corner. 

“Hey. Sunshine. I see you.” Nico said trying to mask his worry. 

How long had he been there?

Will exhaled a laugh. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to… stalk…? I was going to check up on you but you were talking with Percy and I did to want to interrupt.”

“How much did you overhear?” Nico asked, deciding to cut to the point. 

Will turned pinker. “Nothing! I swear I wasn’t trying to listen into your conversation. I was just watching,” he said getting redder. “I mean-! I wasn’t like ‘watching’ watching. But I was also not listening. I was just waiting for an opening is all. So I could check up on you. Because that’s what I’m here to do right now. Check up on you that is.”

Will snapped his mouth shut, trying to stop the word-vomit from getting worse. He had a flight-or-flight look in his eyes, as if how Nico responded would be the deciding factor in how this interaction went. He wished Will hadn’t stopped. He couldn’t pin down the exact reason why he liked hearing that incoherent mess of speech, but he did. It took a bit longer for him to realize that while he was brain was occupied by the rambling of the boy across from him, it was too full to waste energy on worrying. 

Nico tried -really tried- to think of something comforting or cringe-reducing to say but he could help it when a laugh slipped out. 

And another. And one more. And five seconds later he was miserably failing to stifle his giggles with his left hand. 

“Wha-“ Will started. “What is it? Are you ok?Did one of my siblings but you on laughing gas or something? It was Kayla wasn’t it?!”

This made Nico laugh even harder. “Oh gods no. You’re just really weird. In a good way. You kept on saying more and it made it get worse and worse.” He laughed again. “Thank you for that. Holy hades I needed a good laugh.”

Will didn’t even flinch when Nico described his little speech as pathetic. If anything, it seemed to make him more confident. Composed. “Well I’m glad you feel joy at my expense,” he said rolling his eyes. “And you have a pretty laugh too. I like hearing it.” He smiled at Nico, his gaze moving to the glow between them. 

Oh right. 

Stop getting comfortable. Especially with him. 

Nico shifted in his seat, moving so his arms are crossed with his left ring-finger covered by his arm. He failed to avert his gaze from Will’s disappointed eyes. 

See? Even if it weren’t wrong, you could never be with him. You fail everybody, and Will is no different. 

A few beats of silence. 

“So uh… checkup?” Nico suggested. 

“Yes! Right. Let me just…” he trailed off. Something about clipboards and procedures that Nico did not have to energy nor interest to pay attention to. 

Will got the information he needed. Apparently a lot of Nico’s story was already in the documents.

“Like I said: I know your history,” Will stated with faux-intimidation. Nico rolled his eyes. 

When they got to the physical checkup Nico started getting jittery. He felt awkward saying something to Will about it, but he really didn’t like being touched so much. Especially because Will’s hands were so… methodical. It was bringing him back. 

To the times of your torment? Good. Revel in it. In the feeling of pain. Relive it all. Maybe if you look tortured enough somebody will even pity you. Why do you think you want that so badly? You know how hard it is to be yourself. Trying to share that burden with somebody else is plain selfish. 

Will noticed. Probably. He didn’t point it out, but he tried to lighten the mood, albeit with terrible references to things Nico did not have the current cultural knowledge to understand. 

Something about Nico being “Mr. Perfectly Fine” when asked about he was feeling. Or responding to Nico’s remarks about his werewolf scratches with saying, “oh! ‘Tis but a flesh wound I see!” (He seemed really proud of himself with that one). And he kept calling Nico a “padawan”?  What even was that?

Yet, despite the utter confusion that had overtaken Nico, it was a good distraction. Will had or hadn’t brought a laugh out of him a couple of times. Nico was or was not starting to feel a lot more comfortable, especially with Will around. 

And the string they shared absolutely was not glowing more warmly with each passing moment they spent together.  Of course not. Never. 

~~~

After that checkup, Nico offered to help around the infirmary. He did this, of course, hoping that his complete lack of any medical knowledge and “aura of death” would be enough for Will to refuse the offer.

He did not. 

Figures. 

What Will did do however, was introduce anyone and everyone imaginable to Nico. Whether that be random patients, his siblings, his Roman siblings that he (being the social-magnet-golden-retriever that he was) had gotten close with after the war, or some poor soul that happened to be within the vicinity of the two of them. It was weird. Nico didn’t know how to feel. Nobody had treated him like a person they could show others to. He was usually hidden away. Chose to keep himself hidden away. 

Nico was starting to like being seen though. It helped that Will was there too. Unlocking the prison of isolation Nico had made for himself and dragging him into interactions when they were in the middle of filing paperwork. When he introduced Nico to a new person, he almost sounded proud. Like knowing Nico was something they could envy about Will. 

“Oh hey [person] have you met my friend Nico?” Will would say. “Yeah he’s the coolest kid in camp! Go on Nico say hi,” pride radiating from his voice. “We met a few days ago when he almost stabbed me haha. He really saved my skin out there. Even if he was seconds away from passing out while doing it.”

Nico would never admit it, but he kind of liked the attention Will was giving him. It was as if Will’s words of affirmation were able to fight off the self-doubt demons would otherwise occupy much of Nico’s thoughts. 

Not only that, but he also liked meeting people. 

Yes. Him. Nico di Angelo. The son of Hades. Well known social recluse. Enjoying the communion of others. 

Was that new? He thought he was an introvert to the core. The idea of people was supposed to make him want to hide under a rock a perish. Was it just that he was so much of a social outcast that he fooled himself into thinking that?

Dear gods, he was not going to spend the time going down that rabbit hole any further. 

Nico felt a tug on his string finger. Will had started doing that in order to touch Nico without touching him. Nico hadn’t decided yet how he felt about it. Well, his heart obviously had, but he’s choosing to ignore that stubborn organ in all matters pertaining to Will. He looked up, slowly bringing himself back to reality. 

Back to the storage/office room they were (as Will had put it) “chillin’” in. Back to the smell of antiseptic spray and old files. Back to the blonde idiot staring into his soul, seemingly trying to solve a puzzle. 

“…what?” Nico broke the silence. 

Will stared for a beat longer. “You were staring off into space for a while. Are you ok?”

He thought for a moment too long. 

“Yes,” was the response Nico decided on. 

Will stared even deeper with a curious look. “…ok… sure. What were you thinking about then?”

Nico was just about to bark out a basic response of “oh nothing”, or something like that, but he stopped himself. He didn’t need to hold himself back. Not when Will was looking at him in that eager and open way that he does. 

“I was thinking about how much in my life has changed,” since you entered into it, “in the past few days.”

Maybe he didn’t say the whole truth, but Will was enough to make him no outright lie. 

“Really?” Will backed off some, face turning from questioning frown to genuine smile. “How so?”

Oh. So this was gonna be some cheesy heart-to-heart, was it? Nico was not opposed to that idea. He looked back up at Will’s bright expectant eyes. 

He actually rather liked the idea.

He talked to Will. He was trying to keep it short (Will was always busy) but the more he talked, the more they kept talking. And talking. And talking. Somehow they moved from life the last few days to life in the past few years. Family, in all possible definitions of the word. Friends, in all their shades, hues, and complexities. Enemies, in all their surprising humanity. 

Will’s voice changed depending on what he was saying. He slurred together his words when they were talking about old interests. He would pause or stutter when they transitioned to deep topics, and slowed down when they got comfortable there. His voice got all jittery and slightly more high pitched when he was excited about something. 

And the way he listened… the way it felt like he hung onto every word Nico said like it was written in scripture…

Nico kept wondering when Will would leave. He would find some excuse about having to check up on a patient, or outright say he didn’t want to stay there. 

Wouldn’t want to stay with you. Why would anyone want to spend time with you. You’re boring him and he will leave you—

But Will hasn’t left. How long has they been there? They sat down on a nearby desk a while ago. Will was still with him. 

Will, talking about his mom and how much he misses her. Will, listening to Nico’s stories of his childhood in Italy. Will, leaning into the beats of silence that would occasionally fall between them with a rare comfort. Will, inching closer to Nico with each passing second. Will, making their string glow impossibly brighter with the effect he had on Nico. Will, coiling the string around his fingers until there was no space between his and Nico’s hands. Will, cutting himself off mid-sentence just to graze Nico’s hand. 

Will. Will. Will. 

How long had it been? It was dark outside. Not that Nico cared. In the moment all that Nico cared about was right by his side, chatting animatedly, listening with care, leaning against Nico as he got more tired. Nico couldn’t imagine falling asleep now. His heart was beating so fast one would think he was about to be killed by some monster. 

For some reason this moment felt more important than any of those past life-or-death experiences. He was safe. Nobody was in danger. But all those times he was fighting to live. Now he’s living to be alive. 

With Will. 

He looked over at the boy now resting on his shoulder and smiles. His mouth slightly open and he’s just barely snoring. It’s adorable. Nico’s heart warms with affection. 

Affection. He liked using that word in this moment. He smiled. 

He liked using that word for Will. 

~~~

The Apollo Cabin did not cut him any slack when he brought a sleeping Will back in a bridal carry late into the night.

~~~

“Hey! It’s Mr. Perfectly Fine!” Will exclaimed to his siblings when Nico had entered the infirmary office. 

Nico had caught a glimpse of Will hunched over his desk, with an exhausted expression written on his face just as Nico had walked in. It seemed like he was talking to his siblings, Kayla and Austin, about how he can “totally handle all this work” and that he’s “not burnt out”. They however, were willing to drop that conversation to snicker at Nico regarding whatever it was Will had just said. 

“Seriously? You have no other jokes,” Nico retorted. “What is that referencing? I’m convinced you’re making it up at this point.”

“Oh please, at this point it’s your fault for not being a part of the Taylor Nation,” Kayla chimed in. 

“I’ve been here for two days!”

Kayla crossed her arms. “That’s two whole days of Taylor Swift that you could have been listening to.”

Nico rolled his eyes and looked to Austin, the one person left who hadn’t taken a side against him.

“What?” He responded. “They’re right. All the effort you’ve made to avoid Taylor Swift is really some Kanye behavior.”

Nico hated his past self. Why did he decide to start hanging out with the Apollo Cabin? They were one mess of snarky comebacks joined together by their obsession over various musicians. 

“I’ve been helping out! Would you really rather have me be wasting oxygen while listening to Swift?” Nico asked the cohesive mass. 

“Yes!” They all shouted in (a partially harmonized) unison. 

Nico groaned and sat on the chair he had placed next to Will’s desk the last time he was in this office. He’s only been here for three days and yet he has a spot for him. Next to Will. 

The siblings talked about some infirmary stuff. Work schedules, post-war stuff, some new Roman ailments they learned about. Nico tuned it out, picking at his hangnails. 

Some time later, the door Nico had just come through slammed open with an uninterested Drew Tanaka on the other end. 

“Hey shitheads! I need drugs!” She said. 

Nico raised an eyebrow at her and turned to look at Will, hoping he would translate. 

Without looking up from his desk, Will rolled his eyes and said, “Sweet baby Zeus, can’t you just say ibuprofen like a normal person?”

He pushed back on his chair to get up, but Kayla pushed him right back. 

“Nuh-uh. I’ve got this. You stay here and take a break with your,” she looked at Nico, “dude-best-friend.” She winked at him.  

She headed out the door, with Drew on her heels. 

The three left in the room looked at each other. A silent conversation played out between Will and Austin that lasted for much longer than a silent conversation has any right to last. Nico was glad to not be involved in it, whatever it was. 

Austin sighed. “I guess I’ll go with them to make sure they don’t blow anything up.” 

“Again,” Will added. 

With a quick finger-gun-snap to his brother, Austin left. 

The door creaked it as it closed. 

“Wait,” Nico put his elbows on the desk. “How many explosions have they caused?” He thought for a second. “How do they even cause explosions to happen?”

He waits for a second more. Will is writing something down. Nico probably shouldn’t have interrupted by talking. He needed to be more conscious about his actions. Especially now that he is friends with Will. What was it Kayla said? “Dude-best-friend”? Yeah. He needed to be a better dude-best-friend. Not that they were “best friends”. It was probably just some slang or something. If they were even considered to be best-

Thunk. 

Will face-planted onto his desk. 

“Shit.” How long had he been working? “Are you ok?” 

Will held up a hand to give a thumbs-up before dropping it back down to his desk. Will started snoring. 

Nico knew there was a right way to react to this. Will probably had the answer for him. But Nico couldn’t find it in himself to do anything but stare. Stare and think. Like he was moving in slow motion but the rest of the world wasn’t kind enough to take note.

Was this normal for Will? Did he just collapse at his desk from time to time? No. He was always preaching his gospel of “taking care of yourself” and whatnot. This had to be a one-off thing. 

He’s probably fine, right? Sure, he’s probably a little bit burnt out, but it’s not life and death or anything. 

Yeah good idea. Bury your problems. Maybe one day you’ll share a grave with them.

How could he even think like that? “Not life and death,” so many things are not life and death but they are still worth worrying about. 

Nico is a terrible friend. He needs to be worrying more about Will. Will needs help. 

And how the hell do you expect to help him? Name one time you weren’t a burden to somebody. Every time you try to do something it fails. Just stop. 

Gods. He was pathetic. His friend was passed out in front of him, and he was standing there, frozen. He should do something. He needed to do something. He just. He- he had to-

You always let people down. You’re too pitiful to help anyone. 

No! He could help! 

Will laid there fully unaware of the warfare happening in Nico’s mind. Someone looking in would likely find his state of rest to look peaceful. He was just a tired kid doctor in a tiny room filled with papers and files. 

Outside that room was a couple of teenagers bickering about ibuprofen and explosives. It was a conversation severely lacking in context for the onlookers not in said conversation. 

Even further beyond there were children doing dangerous and mundane activities. Somewhere a kid first encountered a monster. A man proposed to his girlfriend to the joy of an entire restaurant. A man proposed to his boyfriend to the shock, disgust, and joy of a small park. A child wrote a letter that never got read to her father fighting in a war. A species that was never discovered went extinct. A group of teenagers got high on the roof of a parking lot. A tired mother decided to quit smoking for the third time that year. A grandparent met their first grandson. 

And back in that small room with too much paper and a sleeping boy, a damaged kid sees nothing but the worst of it. 

Nico’s mind is a tunnel with no light at the end; flashing horrors crowding it out and letting no logic or hope in. 

This was life-or-death. If Nico didn’t do something, he would be responsible for whatever happened to Will. 

Will would know what to do. If Nico just knew Will better. If he just payed a bit more attention while Will worked. He must have been a terrible friend, having not cared enough to know how to handle this. 

Finally, something you’re right about. 

Gods! How could he even be drowning in this self pity now? Will needed help. He needed… caffeine? An intervention? He needed something and Nico needed to help. He could help. He needed to help. He needed-

His hand met a warmth. He looked down to see his and Will’s hands touching. Nico didn’t know when he started reaching for his hand. He let it sit there for a few beats of tense, heavy, warm silence. 

His fingers moved without his consent to gently coil their string. 

People say that, for soulmates, strings are able to pass emotions. The way one touches their string and the feeling they have while holding it are felt by the person on the other side. 

Nico could… send some comfort? The thoughts would have made him laugh in any other circumstance. Him. Being the bringer of comfort. But in this instance, he could. There wasn’t anything else he coulddo. 

No you cannot. You will lead yourself to heartbreak. 

Will groaned. Nico flinched. 

His hand twitched to reach out. To let Will know that “I’m here”. That “you can talk to me”. 

You can’t do that. 

He couldn’t do that though. 

You don’t know how to comfort people. 

He didn’t even know how to comfort people. 

Just look in front of you, you let this happen under your watch. 

He’d let this happen. 

And here you are thinking to yourself instead of doing anything. 

Gods! He just needed to focus. Think of some solution.

Just think! Just think! Just think! Just-

A door opened and Nico’s throat dropped, feeling like he had been caught doing something he shouldn’t have done. Which was stupid. He knew that. 

He uselessly held his hands up and backed up, turning to the door. His body was frozen as thoughts of the thousands of ways the next few seconds could go all competed for his attention. He was a deer in the headlights, weakly looking past the person who was on the other end of the door. They looked at the scene in the room and raised an eyebrow.

“Nico? What happened?” Austin asked. 

Austin! Thank the gods! He can-

“Help.” Nico creaked. “I don’t know what happened. Will, he…” Nico cut himself off. His throat was so choked up it was barely letting him say anything. It hurt. He didn’t realize he was this close to tears. 

Fucking baby. 

Austin rushed to his brother’s side and after a few moments sighed a breath of relief. “He’s fine. Just exhausted.” He took a few moments to give Nico a worried look. “Are you fine?”

Nico couldn’t respond. His body was still in fight-or-flight mode. He could only hear the pounding of his heartbeat, so strong it was like it was coming directly from his ears. There was to much happening. He just needed to calm down. He also had to respond. He had to look normal. He had to help with- 

“Everything is fine.” The mantra he repeated in his mind. “He’s just exhausted. He’s ok. I’m ok.” 

No you’re not. No he’s not. 

Austin just confirmed that there was nothing to worry about.

You just don’t care enough about Will to keep worrying for him. 

“I’m ok,” he finally responded, voice even more shaky. 

Austin made a doubtful look and walked over to a shelf, pulling out some ball. He handed it to Nico, placing it in a hand he had not realized was shaking until then. He squeezed it and it was cushiony, but firm. 

“Breathe with me,” Austin said simply. 

And they breathed together. Slowly in.  Holding it. Slowly out. Holding it. 

After a minute or so he asked “would you mind if I brought Kayla here too?”

Shrugging, Nico lied. “I don’t mind. I’m fine really.” Although he didn’t know why he was still trying. 

“No, you’re not.”

Austin steps out of the room and sticks his head out the door, peering down the corridor. “Kayla!”

Nico heard a muffled, “What?! I’m busy!”

Again shouting back, “Just come over here please!”

Some shuffling. Some footsteps. “What’s up?”

Austin stepped aside and let her view the scene. Her eyes softened and she walked over towards where Nico stayed standing. 

“Oh Gods Nico, what’s wrong?” She asked him. 

He tried for a dry laugh. “Nononono I’m fine. I was just a little-“ he choked. He hopelessly tried to steady his voice. “Just a little worried for Will is all.”

Kayla’s eyes immediately went wide with panic at the mention of his brother’s name. “What happened? Is he ok?” She looked over to his desk. 

Austin stepped up to his sister, putting a hand on her arm. “He’s alright Kay. Just a little exhausted,” he said. They looked like they were having a silent conversation for a moment after that ended when they both looked back at Nico. 

“Do you want to sit and talk for a bit?” Austin eventually asked. 

“It doesn’t have to be about anything important,” Kayla added. “Or anything at all. Like, if you need silence with company we got you. Or silence without company. Or company without silence. Or any other combination. Or some other secret option. Or-“

“Company without silence is just the first choice you said,” Austin interrupted

Kayla thought for a second. “It is, isn’t it? It feels like there should be more combinations of those words though.”

“No company with no silence.”

“Ok but does that actually make any sense? Unless you talk to yourself professionally you wouldn’t be alone and without silence.”

“I would say that I can be alone without silence. I’m an interesting guy, I have fun talking to myself.”

“Yeah well, you’re just lonely so-“

A laugh escaped from Nico. They both looked at him. 

“Sorry,” he said, for once with a steady voice. “The way you guys talk to each other is really funny to watch.” It reminded him of how he was with Bianca when they were younger. They used to argue all the time, sometimes escalating into screaming matches. Their mother would always step in and say something wise and meaningful that completely went over Nico and his sister’s heads. If Bianca were both alive now, would it be like this? Would their arguments not be out of malice but sibling love? What would that have looked like with them?

Kayla rested an arm on her brother’s shoulder as he looked at her with fake disgust. “We are, aren’t we?” She asked him. 

“I really don’t think you’re ‘funny’. If anything funny looking.”

Kayla walked over to a circular table and sat down. “Oh please. I’m the hottest sibling. No contest.”

Austin followed her, taking a seat for himself. “If that’s what you want to believe, I will let you continue living with that lie.”

Kayla scoffed and looked back at Nico. “Wanna join the order of the round table?”

Yes. 

“I uh… Are you sure it won’t get in the way of,” he waved his hand around at the general vicinity, “infirmary duties?”

“Not really,” Austin answers. “We did rounds this morning and everybody just needs more time to heal with the meds and magic,” which he embellished with spirit fingers, “and we already gave them their afternoon doses. Unless there’s some random emergency-“

“Or Drew comes back demanding drugs again,” Kayla added. 

“Or that, then we’re just chilling.”

Nico wanted to say yes.

Don’t fool yourself kid. They don’t want you there. You’re just being a burden. They seem to be having a great time without-

Nico squeezed the ball. He moved to the table. He smiled and they smiled back. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Author’s Note:

thank you so much for reading!! To that one person who commented on my last fic saying they needed more: thank you specificially. And I’m sorry specifically for you because the wait for the next one is going to be worse than a cartoon hiatus. Tho I’m actually going to be spending that time writing instead of feeling guilty for not writing to that’s a win. also I have an Ao3 now so that’s cool

[ashenprofessor]

Celebrating TOA and the people who contribute to make our group what it is.

Repost, don't reblog. Only fill in what you feel comfortable sharing!

Happy anniversary, TOA! Here's to many more years spent together.

Name: Rua

Pronouns: they/he

Birthday (no year): 02/10 (I share my birth with Kaze and am also a twin!)

Where are you from? What is your time zone? From UK, GMT

How long is your roleplay experience? however long Byleth has been in TOA

How were you introduced to roleplaying as a whole? tbh, I'm not even sure. Just found TOA somehow despite not really being a tumblr user and yeah... here I am.

How were you introduced to TOA? see above answer

Do you have any pets? Yes. A black void cat who's mine and family dog.

What is your favorite time of year and why?(Season, holiday, general period) Autumn because the temperatures mean can snuggle up with games/book/videos but not freeze your ass off. Plus autumn colour is so pretty.

What is your IRL occupation? Structural Engineer

Some interests and things you like/enjoy? I like fantasy and sci-fi books, playing boardgames and rock climbing.

What non-Fire Emblem games do you play? Kingdom hearts, Professor Layton, Persona, Yakuza (Like a dragon), Pokemon, Final Fantasy, lot's of games really 😅

Favorite Pokemon type & Pokemon: Dark type. Lycanrock (Duskform)

Tell us some funfacts and trivia about yourself! I'm a black belt in taekwondo, I like to crochet and I've just started learning drums.

How did you get into Fire Emblem? I bought Awakening after watching a top 10 3ds games video where it was described as 3d chess. Played a bit then got very invested in Fates as it was releasing. Bought my copy birthright with first ever paycheck.

What Fire Emblem games have you played? Engage, 3Houses and 3Hopes, Fates, Awakening, Echoes, Warriors (started), Fire Emblem Binding Blade (Currently playing)

First & Favorite Fire Emblem games: first was technically Awakening but I didn't finish it till 2023. First finished was 3 houses. My favourite? Either fates or 3 Houses.

List your 5 favorite Fire Emblem characters across the series! Byleth, Shez, Kaze, Dimitri, Xander

Who was the first character ever to make you go “ooh I like this one in particular” and why? Can be any context and reason! Dimitri for his story arc. And eyepatch. And later hairstyle.

Any Fire Emblem crushes?

If you’ve played (or are familiar with) the following games, who was your first S support? Who would you S support nowadays?- Awakening:- Fates:- Three Houses:- Engage:

Favorite Fire Emblem class?

If you were a Fire Emblem character, what would be your class and stats? Would you be playable? Ninja or tactician.

If you were a Three Houses character, what would be your affiliation? (Black Eagles, Blue Lions, Golden Deer, Church of Seiros, Those Who Slither in the Dark, unaffiliated civilian, other - for example Almyran) Blue Lions

If you were an Officers Academy student, what would be your boons, banes and potential budding talent? Boon: Reason Bane: Heavy Armour. Budding Talent: Gauntlets

If you were an Engage character, which nation would you originate from? (Firene, the Kingdom of Abundance; Brodia, the Kingdom of Might; Elusia, the Kingdom of Knowledge; Solm, the Queendom of Freedom; Lythos, the holy land of the Divine Dragon; Gradlon, the desolate land of the Fell Dragon)

How do you pronounce TOA? T-O-A

Current TOA muses: Byleth

Past TOA muses? Chrom, Shez, Dimitri

Who was your first TOA muse? If you no longer have them, can you see yourself picking them up again? Byleth. Don't think I could ever drop them.

Do you believe you have a type of character you gravitate towards writing? Mostly with MC as less anxiety of getting the portrayal or lore/canon wrong. I do like Lords too.

Do you have characters or types of characters you don’t think you can handle writing, but wish you could? I wish I could write a soft/tragic character which people would love/protect. Or a complete arsehole but I always feel bad being too mean.

What kind of scenes, situations etc do you believe you enjoy writing the most? I've really enjoyed writing pokemon AUs and word count challenges.

Do you have any scenario in mind for your muse(s) that gets you thinking “man I hope I get to write this one day”? Maybe some other type of AU which aligns with other interests like Persona/KH/ Camp Half-blood etc.

Favorite TOA-related memories? Just the love and support from everyone here and the fun we all have together hyping each other up. Plus Lore events. Especially Unscripted 2022 where Shez became a K-pop idol in dance offs while Byleth was in a apocalyptic future. The dichotomy was hilarious.

Present or past tense? Past tense is what I default to writing but my dyslexia means I can swap part way through sentence! Third person.

Normal size text, small text, no preference? Normal text as easier to read.

Got any potential muse delusions to share? If I could handle 2 muses I would love a Shez rerun