#does this even count as a dunk????? i dont think it does

[kooki914]

you should make a spamton rant. rip him apart and tell the world every intimate reason he is a disreputable and immoral individual who got exactly what he deserved. we need more spamton hate in this community. people obviously dont understand just how bad he can be

Seeing as the blog that sent this is empty, and the phrasing of this ask is downright comical, I'm willing to bet this is rage bait.

If not, I'm genuinely sorry you think like this, random person, because my dislike of Spamton is, you guessed it, subjective! Just like every opinion about a fictional character, it's entirely up to the reader to form their own thoughts and decide if they like them or not, if they'd put up with their actions or not, and if the context we're provided makes their actions justified or unforgivable to you. Opinions are flexible and valid, and even change over time!

Now excuse me as I write an essay in response to this general concept because you HAVE baited me, just not in the way you wanted.

I'd like to take a moment to comment on the absolute state of discussing "character good/character bad" in fandoms, especially nowadays. Because of the increased politicization of fandom culture, it almost feels like people treat fandom discourse as inherently political and just as serious. And, while I'd love to talk about the rampant misogyny in fandom or how homophobia still permeates even in progressive spaces, I'm specifically referring to the moralization of media engagement.

The "you can't watch this" or "you have to watch this", the people in the old undertale fandom who'd tell you you're a bad person if you decided to play through the no mercy route, the people in current deltarune fandom talking about how Kris' race ambiguity makes Toby Fox racist, and, in this case, someone trying to bait ME into moralizing my opinion of Spamton for the sake of a "gotcha" or fodder for their hatred of me. Sorry to disappoint, I don't think Spamton is reprehensible in our, practical, human terms.

He's just some fictional guy who did shitty stuff to a bunch of kids and kind of got his comeuppance in the end. That exact description applies to him, Spade King, and undertale Asgore even though they're entirely different characters. And, also, I fucking ADORE Spade and Asgore, but my subjective opinion, the Vibe Check if you will, is that Spamton is worse than them. I think we can all agree that In Real Life murder of 6 children is obviously worse than being a con artist. However, this is also fiction, and those deaths shouldn't be treated with the SAME severity as actual, real crimes against humanity should be. They are severe, yes, and breaches of morality, but not REAL morality. Actual children weren't harmed in the making of undertale, believe it or not. These reprehensible actions from the cast are narrative vessels meant to show us the state of mind a character is and how far they're willing to go.

I think Spamton's desperation for reaching his "heaven" is disturbing because he was willing to extort and kill a child for it. In the same vain, I think Asgore is a coward for choosing to go through with his plan when the human that walked into his throne room was a literal child and not someone deserving of the death penalty, which happened 7 separate times. The difference is, I like Asgore and dislike Spamton. Not for moral reasons. Just Vibes.

This ask was 100% spurred on by the video I made about shadow crystals and secret bosses. It's kind of telling of their lack of media literacy, how this (practically) anon took nothing away from that video except "this guy thinks Spamton sucks", because that was decidedly not the point. Even during my rant about him in the video, when I call him a bad person I am simply stating in-universe facts. Things that most people who like Spamton as a character rather than a poor little meow meow can agree DID happen, and DOES make him morally grey. And this is where the politicization of fandom comes in again, because I only felt the need to add that rant into that section because there's SO many people who feel the need to justify liking immoral characters by making them super not bad at all - talking about the grey as if it's white, and if you point out the darker shades, they think you're trying to paint over all of it with black.

The people who over-exaggerate how tragic Spamton's or Spade King's lives were, the ones who justify reprehensible actions through "but he's mentally ill!" (even though a sentiment like that just further stigmatizes mental illness but that's a different topic), the people that say "X character did nothing wrong" without a twinge of irony in their tone.

Spamton is not Satan. He's also not a flawless angel.

The complete loss of being able to view a character as both Bad and Likable at the same time is tragic to me, because 90% of the characters I adore are bad, reckless, stupid, selfish, downright EVIL sometimes, and even if they may be lonely or misunderstood underneath it all, that is NOT something that erases their flaws! The whole POINT of moral grayness and complexity in characters is that we learn to take the good AND the bad in stride. Where do you draw a line in the sand? Does their charisma make them lovable enough to you that you want to keep watching them do The Bad Thing as long as they're having fun with it? Or does their grappling with and regret of The Bad Thing make them so emotionally compelling to you that you want to see where they'll go next, no matter the morality of their future actions?

If you like Spamton, more power to you. If you're in love with the weird funny little puppet man, even better, live your best life. But, for the love of god, engage with him as the character he actually is, without scrubbing away the awkward and the morally dubious for the sake of a cleaner character to play with. I genuinely believe most of the cult surrounding Spamton understands this, most of what I've seen from his most avid fans still paint him as his greedy conniving canon self, it's just that there's a loud minority (and the filthy casuals who don't read any deeper into him and just flatten every character they talk about) who deliberately try to convince you that Spamton is OBJECTIVELY a good person, or OBJECTIVELY someone you have to like, otherwise you're weird and, like, hate mentally ill people or something. I've gotten a Lot of weird comments on that video you guys wouldn't even believe.

All in all I consider that Spadesgore must be canonized.

[the-kinfesssional]

Hey.. MM.me again.. Spamton G. Spamton... Sniffle sniffle this was longer than i wanted oops sorry so sorry IM FUCKING STRUGGLING OUT HERE How do I tell A memoryfrom a headcanon is it a headcanon if its me? what is it??where ?? what?? huh??? what????????????????? I cant tell. Im a fictionkin I know that. but im like so confused al the time. Like thats me. But also Idk im really used to just dissociating I thug it out ok. i dont really go into kin spaces a lot like at all so I dont know proper terms but I know what i feel Inside but then im like No thats cringe an,d also that cannot possibly be real. I dont relaly know if i believe in past lives(?) ornot at least As a fictional character. for me personally. but at the same time. I Guess i do? Huh. Its strange. Like this guy is just me. I am him he is me because.Thats me. I dont get as bad Kin(?) dysphoria as i do Gender dysphoria. I know how i could still be happy In a human body I Guess. But it just feels like itll never fully be me. Or will it. I dont know. it makes me so happy it makes me feel such a way that I cant even explain its like this feeling in my chest and its like.......Yeah. Thats me. But Iveee been Very. Disconnected from kin stuff lately because ive been super stressed and distracted with other stuff and ive just felt like a wet sack of sand being thrown at a wall and the sand is all like gross and wet and its leaking everywhere and its gross like you know when you get sand all over you at the beach but youre also like Damp and the sand is all Sticky and Grimey and also Scratchy. thats how ive been feeling mentally onfg can someone give me a mental shower i needto get DUNKED. This ended up being a longer rant and also skewing off into different things than i wanted but its ffine whatever. Ugm. Id ont know where else to go. BACK ON THE MEM THING BECAUSE I GOT VERY DISTRACTED. I dont know. I have this one very very very specific Flash this Instance in my mind and I dont know if i consider it a memory or not???????? I thhink i am a.,, Psychological kin mostly. if thats the right term. idfk man. can i still have memories. Are these even memories? do my headcanons count as My canon is that what that is ???? I NDONT KNOW IM GOING INSANE but I can also have conflicting ones existing in separate timelines. but like. im not like a multiple timeline and past life guy. i think? its not a huge belief of mine. i just. I am. i AM. Im spamton. Are memories supposed to be In first person. is it just feelings. is it. what. how do i define. How do i tell? How can i tell. aRe the The little movies in my head the little Blorbo Situations. like. whats those count as. Also why does being canon divergent make me feel sick to my stomach. whenever new DR content is released with me involved i feel sick cause im like IM THE REAL ONE I M THE REAL ONE IF I DIVERGE IM A SICK FAKER AND THEYRE GONNA TAKE ME OUT BACK AND KICK ME IN THE SHINS!!! And its really weird. Like huh. Nobody cares. I care though. uhm. idk. call me boyfail the way i bash my head through a wall and make a hole in it and then put a pillow in it and take a little nap wiwiwiwi hoink wiwiwiwiwi (the sound I make when I sleep)

Its confusing, I know. I think psychological kins don't have memories, but you can have headcanon about yourself, I believe? Im not sure. Im a spiritual kin

[kazuma-asogi-blog]

what expectations? that your hair is black and soft and sharp-ended like the midnight dawn, and that it belongs to the most handsome man in all of england? mr handsome thats just facts. more people should know this i think because thats just true!! im not giving anyone expectations that you cant meet because you surpass them all!!!

yes i know, but i did make some soup, its garlic and nettle and carrot and forest greens!! and i will deliver it tomorrow morning first thing!! mr pretty prosecutor decided im not a poisoning risk so i can just make you both food now, which is good for my heart. i felt bad not giving both of you food and now you both get food!! also i made bread, so you will have bread to dunk in your soup.

but so far as i have heard hes got a garlic allergy? because of the whole hes-a-vampire thing? or maybe thats just garlic blossoms, but you dont cook with those. i unno it seems not worth the risk.

and its okay that your dancing isnt the best, i can get you rhythm and someone!! is going to have to teach you to dance to an irish jig!! ive never seen japanese dances before you should show me. i fiddle in the streets sometimes i think this might work!!!

i didnt get to make a report though even though you told me to. im really sorry i did want to just. jack told me who the inspector was (some guy named edword allaw?) but then he said no one was going to listen because id never be able to prove anything and hes probably right but. okay this may sound weird but he did say if i snitched to the reaper hed send the professor after me and then he tried to punch me. he missed and put a hole in his wall but given that the professor killed the one guy not sixty feet from my flat (thats what that old chalk body mark is, the neighbourhood kids keep redrawing it) i am gonna. desperately hope the reapers handsome apprentice does not count. is that ok?? i hope it is ok but i am getting a bit afraid here!!

Well, I...I'm flattered.

Thanks for the soup, it was still hot and the perfect thing for a day like today. It may be spring now, but the weather is miserable, isn't it? And I'm impressed you got Lord van Zieks to try something of yours.

Oh that? Heh. Maybe he is a vampire. You never know...

I have never seen Irish dancing. I would be interested in learning about it as well.

Thank you for the name. I will make the report. You should be careful - confronting a criminal alone is dangerous and foolish. As for the Professor, he is dead and you have nothing to fear from him.

Sorry if I'm short, I have...something on my mind.

[randomkposts]

In your opinion, would fem mello be a 'not-like-other-girls'

E:-  Mello might be like that unironically. 

K:- expand?

E:- Mello breaks the conformity of what is seen to be as socially acceptable in femininity

K:- and masculinity

E:-Mello as abrasive as she is, I can't genuinely add her with the misogyny attitude of 'I'm not like other girls' that is a sub branch of 'pick me' girls. Both are taken with the goal of putting down other women in order to elevate themselves. 

K:- you make a good point. 

E:- Especially with our Mello. Thank you!

I detest that sort of attitude since it's seen as a part of "feminism", but breaks it instead of strengthening it.

Besides that, Mello is Mello, she does her own rules and likes what she likes. She might've been coming off that, however she isn't going to make it her personality. 

K:-"I'm not like other girls" is putting other girls down in an attempt to differentiate yourself from them, at their expense. .. and yours. Have some solidarity.

E:-Lmao. When i read that last part I can imagine Mello walking away but turn around and jabs a finger at whoever is acting like this

"Have some fucking solidarity."

K:-"I l'm not like other girls, I'm not obsessed with makeup".

"Ok then, I'm sure you have your own weird obsessions that other people roll their eyes at you over, but you don't see me bringing it up as a topic of conversation with you."

E:-Also it does point out that yes most of our fem versions of L Near Mello and Matt aren't the usual form of "general" social acceptance however none of them are going to tear down other women who do follow feminine traits. 

K:-I don't do makeup really, but if someone has put the time into it to develop skill at it, then good on them.

E:-Especially ones like Takada, Naomi and yes even Misa can be added. 

Yes! That too! I love light and bright soft colors and dresses. I can't always wear them due to weather and work.

While yes if we wanna continue the ye old inner misogyny self hatred maybe Mello did have this stemming from other outer interactions outside of Whammy. 

K:-As foil to Mello, Light would do that unironically in the opposite way.

Light hates everyone in this, and will dunk on boys and girls.

"You've never played a video game?"

"What am I a boy? Why would I waste my time on that."

"You've never had a spa day?"

"I'm not like other girls, I don't waste my time on that" except not outloud, just inner monologue for both.

E:-As looking at Whammy.....they genuinely don't seem to give a shit about normalcy. 

They should invest in Social Public cues as a class mandatory seeing all their geniuses are inept. 

K:-"That kid can be a autistic as they want, all that matters here is that they can solve murders."

E:-Agreed. "As far as I am concerned, I take my studies seriously. Enjoy your spa, your nails seem to be neglected."

Mello can also toss that attitude with the best arm shot she can cause she has seen all types of geniuses at Whammy's so fuck that type of thinking. 

K:- A Class social ,as other people see it.

"I know half of you dont care to interact with other people in real life, but its important to learn how they think, to understand possible motives behind murders, if nothing else. So as stupid as it sounds, being possessive of another person under the guise of love, is plenty of reason to commit murder. Apparently. We will now cover that angle in detail."

E:-"Today we learn why humans tend to act aggressively to commit murder when they aren't receiving intercourse. And decide to blame women for their woes."

Hey, Funny thoughts like unrelated to this, DN needs you to accurately write names and correct face right. Imagine someone getting a face tattoo only to cover it with make up lmak. Lmaooo. 

K:-I think enough of a facial Tattoo might count as enough to mess with the Shinigami eyes, but I think something permanent like a tattoo would eventually count as a part of your face, in contrast to something temporary like a scarf.

E:-Yeah but like is anyone gonna check if you cover it with makeup consistently.

K:-It never came up in death note, because its set in Japan. It should have been a problem when Light had to interact with Amarica. I think it depends on the makeup. 

Like maybe if it was massive clown makeup or something. 

E:-I mean lets be real someone gonna have to done that at some point never update anyone kept it private. You seen makeup gurus right. Freaking magic with contours. 

K:-I don't know, Tattoos are not always something you can get in one session. 

E:-Small. Get a mini bee tattoo. 

K:-And they need time to heal. Would be hard to keep a secret. 

E:-Put a bandage and go "I got my ass handed to me."

K:-Several times in the same place?

E:-No, since tattoo's generally depend on how long it takes. Some can be done in a couple hours and can be small. 

Shit K I can tattoo a mini soup character and cover it up

K:-We are forgetting about fake tattoos! Which are temporary, and so changeable. 

E:-AHAHAHA! I was gonna bring that up but went meme later.

K:- wait. Let me look up the rules. 

"A side view of a person's face is enough to be able to see their name and lifespan. A person's eyes must be visible in order for it to work, but if they are wearing sunglasses while their entire face is visible, it will work. It will also work If half a person's face is seen vertically.

Circumstances where the Shinigami Eyes will not work to see a person's name and lifespan include seeing the back of a person's head, seeing the lower half of their face (i.e. eyes are not visible), and seeing their body but not their face.

A photograph of a person is also acceptable, and follows the same rules as listed above. The only exception to this is when the person in the picture is deceased, in which case their name and lifespan will not be visible. "

Or formally. -

"In order to see the names and life spans of humans by using the eye power of the god of death, the owner must look at more than half of that person's face. When looking from top to bottom, he must look at least from the head to the nose. If he looks at only the eyes and under, he will not be able to see the person's name and life span. Also, even though some parts of the face, for example the eyes, nose or mouth are hidden, if he can basically see the whole face, he will be able to see the person's name and life span. It is still not clear how much exposure is needed to tell a person's name and lifespan, as this needs to be verified."

E:-Mmmm

K:-Tattoos might not work

E:-If half is covered then they can't see it.No no wait

K:-But masking and wearing sunglasses would

E:-We aren't taking in people or ex convicts who do try to cover up half their tattoos. 

Who says a convicted man can't use foundation?!Society?!

*slaps hand on podium* NAY I SAY MAKEUP IS ARMOR!

K:-Nothing against foundation. But I think its getting at face shape being important. 

So the question is, would wigs, hoodies, or religious coverings be any protection?

I mean, a Burqa deff would be more then enough protection. 

E:-Oh totes. Man Covid fucks up Kira's day didn't it. 

K:-Yes. But just a mask might not be enough. So sunglasses to be safe. Mellos burn scar did not protect him from kira murder. Makeup would protect someone from Light, but not Misa, Is what I guess I'm saying. Or Mikami.

Sunglasses that would protect one from the shinigami Eyes, Eclipse!

E:-Damn hack eyes. Oh well guess its back to the traditional misspelling foreign names or wrong kanji. we gotta give those sunglasses to L. 

K:-Maybe If Misora had worn a wig, and makeup, Light would have ignored her. But she had no reason to go to that length of deception to the public at that point in time, as they still didn't know the how.

Look, If I could have a way to keep it without being killed by the shinigami fov being boring, I would be hard tempted by the Shinigami eyes. They get visual acuity of 3.6, or 72/20 vision, regardless of OG eyesight. 

Whether that is worth half of my lifespan is a hard question to answer, but the temptation would be real.

But like, Lights a killer who has his list, goes through it, and moves on. 

In contrast, Misa is more personally motivated, and Mikimai is more detail obsessed.They can just check the TV for pictures. Because Kira being able to kill through photograph sounds batshit to the average Joe, and people still need to know what the school shooters and ect look like, and maybe its easier if they are dead. And then enough of the public was on Kira's side that it never really died out. 

E:-True bur this is Japan. Who has no issues hiding child killers. And still maintains hiding killers faces even post trial. Or the issues with the European system as well doing the same.

K:-Canon Light goes for the surface crime.

E:-LMAO! He just skims Justice.

K:-He kills people who have commited crime and have their name and face available. He doesn't dig. Like, he digs enough to hack, but hes relying on the public a lot more then he would ever consciously admit. 

E:-If he needs details he has Mikami. 

K:-Thats not until part 2.

E:-True true.Ugh God imagine he used the power of 2chan. Japanese 4chan

K:-Like I mean, maybe by part 2 he has gotten better at looking past surface crime and for underlying issues, but If anything, I think the prominence of the cult and stuff means he might have gotten lazier.

E:-Light learning management

K:-I mean, Mello is out there running the mafia (in a vacancy that may be kira related), but that the Mafia still exists after years of Kira indicates that Kira is not as effective as he hopes it to be.Thd Mafia still being around and capable of abducting his sister, indicates that overall crime is not receding as he thought it might. 

E:-Oh no its full on rampant. He is dealing with surface crime. Not the actual big guys. 

Or corrupt politicians outside of Japan like the Philippines or Latin America or South East Asia. 

K:-Yah. The thing about both Light and L as figures of justice, is that they are holding up the current system they live in, not challenging or exposing it. 

E:-While I can't blame them for not digging in more it does add to the fact its not as deep as it could've done as it centers around justice and ego of man. 

K:-They are Justice, so they uphold the justice system as they see it. Light plays it by the socially conventional rules, where L goes off the socially (and often ethically) acceptable path to get the end result, which will be criminal caught. L cares about the journey, where Light cares about the destination.l, it's the same place, but different roads. They don't care why crime happens, just that they stop it. I guess I would say Justice is a core theme, but not the point in the story. 

In contrast, PDN is about Persona 5 and Death Note, so will explore Justice in a lot more detail.

E:-That crossover is gonna take so much brain cells.

K:- I know

E:-I am a monkey with a keyboard ,K

K:-Hey, Imagine if Death note had Nickajack

"Mello is running the Mafia from America". 

"Actually Sir it's worse. He's running the Mafia in Nickajack"

E:-I mean shit yeah that can happen they never had 9/11

Lmao lets make it real. Gotta commit to the DN crazy ass world logic. I snorted my coffee out with that Mello bit. I hope you're proud of yourself. 

K:- I am

[meraki-ss]

Tired, a short story (that i write to vent.)

".. Are you okay? " I approach the lone girl curling into a human ball, all by herself.

".. No. " And only a word i got. "Do you want to talk about it? "

Still a ball, but i got a reply, "What more is there to say? You know how i feel. " Touche.

"I know, but talking might process it out, wanna try? " Still a ball, but this time, no reply.

"Alright, since you dont want to talk about it, I will. " .. Damn, not even a glance.

"Were tired. " I try to choose my words carefully

"Youre tired, Im tired. "

"Weve been tired forever.. "

She whispered with her head bowed down, talking but no one but rather stating a fact. Or her feelings,

"I know, but who fault is it really? "

".. "

".. "

"We dont know. " I slump beside her, "But we do know, is that were tired, why? "

"You know why.. "

"Yes but.. What is it? "

She relents "Were tired of feelings. " I add "Not feelings, " I give her a sideway hug "Anxiety, overthinking, the fear of the impending doom that will never come. Its been.. only a few years, we can count with our fingers. But its so exhausting, isnt it? "

"It is.. " Her voice shake

".. Do you want to talk about it now? Or would you like for me to talk our feelings out? " Her figure shake, but she leans against me like a hypothermic patient. But shes only cold with feelings.

"I want to talk about it. "

I nod, but my presence and soothing touch made her know, that im listening.

"Its tiring, all the feelings like I could be God, only to be cast into the dark dephts of my mind. Fucking hell-- Is this what Lucifer feels? " I sigh

"Its tiring, this thoughts. They come and go like harsh waves, not a calm tide. One moment im hit by the feelings of a hero, and then im swept by the feelings of failure. I dont know what to do anymore, nothing makes sense. Nothing feels real. " She sobs finally, her warm tears flowing out.

"I dont even feel real whenever im.. im.. joyous. " A grimace "Its like im looking at someone else view, like im in my body but im not in my body, im like an observer. And that moment? It already feels like a memory, but im in the present, it doesnt make sense! "

Her hands start casting through her hair, a tell tale sign of a destructive behaviour that i quickly prevent by taking her hands in mine, warming it up. Letting her cold feelings melt away into words.

"I only feel real whenever im in my lowest part, when i get my situation. It feels real, because the consequences are there, i feel real, because i can actually feel those emotions having an effect on me. It feels real, and I dont want all my realness-- all i think I am is sadness. I dont want that. "

I curl her hand in mine as she keeps talking.

"I keep saying this, but its tiring, its tiring.. The fact that time is merciless, society is brutal, and the fact that some people  just don't get it. They dont get how it feels, and its driving me crazy! Is it me, is it them? I need reassurance that its okay to be like this, that one day, someday-- someone will understand and say 'I get it. ' Hell, they don't even need to understand, maybe just a 'Youre allowed to feel like this.' will help! "

"But no one gives it to you, thats why were in this paper. " I let go of her hand, and start tracing it instead

"Thats why Im here. Thats why youre here, this words are a safe haven now. "

".. " 

"I admit, things are still not the brightest right now, but it is getting better. " I trace a heart. "Im.. sad that weve been this tired only by the count of fingers, but it does feel like an eternity doesnt it? Its like theres no end. " I trace my signature drawing of a frog. 

"It gets better, it gets worse.. But i get it, only the worse part feels real and stays for a while. The better part? It flees. " I trace a jellyfish. 

"Its like.. being underwater huh? You dry off for 5 minutes only to get dunked 15 minutes. "

She looks at my hand that is tracing hers, "Im.. " I was about to say 'Im sorry, but i realized maybe this pity party has gone too long. She-- I needed encouragement, i needed gratitude. I need her, so I can be where I am today. 

"Thank you. " I put my hands on top of hers

"Things are not the brightest, but its getting better. Thanks to your hard work, thank you. Thank you for staying for the future, even if the past haunts you like a bitch. Im where I am because of you and I promise, "

I grip her hand. "Ill be here until the next us can finally come between this words and write 'Weve made it.'

. "

[saulbaby]

Cannot wait for the best moment in me1 after my paragon ass works on garrus for the entire game and hes like um u stole the normandy? After everything u said?

I have literally never been so proud

[mono-dot-jpeg]

antarctic idiots [pt.6] - c! technoblade

summary; in which two anarchist piglins adopt an ender boy.

genre; child! ranboo, piglin hybrid! reader, slight canon divergence from dream smp, fluff, found family au is my shit, reader is now ranboo’s parent i don’t make the rules, techno is a grumpy father but it’s okay you love him, realistic minecraft? (idk how to describe it-), uh angst (if you squint)

pairing; c! technoblade x reader, platonic! ranboo x reader

word count; 2.4k

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a/n; regarding techno's death, i have decieded to continue this series after it's long hiatus. i am not trying to stain techno's death with writing. i see this as keeping his character alive and keeping the memory of him alive. i am also coping this way. kind of. i was really sad about his death on the day it happened but now i'm feeling much different in a good way. i dont think techno would want to see any of us sad especially since he was usually the reason we smiled and not why we cried and i intend to keep it that way.

i will be writing for techno but i refuse to do anything nsfw with him as that just feels so disrespectful to him. obviously if there is any statement from his family about fanfics, this will be taken down.

i will continue to write for techno.

i am saying this to lighten this note, techno himself wrote fanfics about hypixel so there's not much of difference between him and a lot of other writers out there. if you don't like what i'm doing, that's fine, to each their own. i like to think i'm preserving his memory like artists.

today was the festival. you hadn't prepared too much (because how did you really need to prepare for a bombing), only bringing your armor and your trusty sword. you were with techno,, the male wondering if wilbur and tommy were coming to join you both.

"no, techno, they can't. they were exiled."

a beat of silence before, "hah, losers. imagine not being invited, L." techno said as you started to walk to l'manburg. you and techno meet up with other citizens and friends of l'manburg. techno greeting them much easier than you were. you didn't even know why you were invited in the first place, who else knew about you helping pogtopia? "is this where everyone who actually got invited meet up?" techno asked as you noticed some familiar faces. he started to ramble a bit though it didn't last long.

you stood behind techno, both of your shadows looming over the much shorter people in the crowd.

"oh, fundy is here."

"yeah! i got some fun games!" you looked at the fox hybrid. he showed the dunking tank, pranking poor niki for a moment. "hey, hey, technoblade! you have a trident right?" the male piglin nodded. "you think you can shoot yourself into the tank?"

"uh, i can try." techno offered, standing in the lake. his arm rose up in the air as he aimed for the sky, but before he could fly, “you’re not gonna drown me in the tank, right?”

“no.” fundy said, the sly fox was very obvious with his intentions, however techno didn’t seem to mind. 

“alright, doesn’t sound like something you would do.” techno shrugged before flying up in the air and into the dunk tank. 

“i would not trust fundy-” niki started but got cut off by the male piglin.

“i made it.” his voice muffled due to his helmet and the water. he partly made it. his head was just in the dunk tank while the rest of him hung out on the edge of it. you laughed a little bit as techno goes back to the lake to try again. he made it this time, yelling in victory before he looks up to see a block above his head.

laughing loudly, fundy looks at the piglin, “i lied.”

you and niki start to help him as techno starts rambling, “i should’ve expected this. well, this is the end for me. any second now i’m gonna drown.” he said dramatically. you put your helping to a stop, remembering what the pink haired male told you about his armor. you knew that technoblade won’t die this easily.

“hey, does anyone have popcorn? i want to see how this ends.” you asked anyone nearby you. they said no, leaving you pouting and eating your baked potatoes in despair as you watched techno dramatically lament about his upcoming “death”.

“i only have a few hours with my respiration 3 helmet.” you laughed loudly with others as techno continued his antics. “i’m feeling kind of hungry actually.” he started to eat his steak while fundy seemed to crumble down, complaining about how techno should’ve just died already. 

“have you seen how much time this man has put into the smp? he probably has four backup sets!” fundy complained as your laughter calmed down to a few chuckles. 

“hold on, i left the stove on at home.” techno broke the block and flew right out with ease. you could tell the fox had long given up at his task of killing techno with the dunk tank.

❚ Quackity > GATHER AT THE MANBURG PODIUM

before the speech had begun, techno shows off his fireworks that he had prepared for the festival. "woo fireworks!" he says in his usual monotone voice as everyone else cheers in awe othe the colorful explosives. you, on the other hand, had seen techno prepare the fireworks in his own base. how did you find that base underwater? he will never know. 

"hello everybody and welcome to the manburg festival!" schlatt annouced. "i have invited all the citizens of manburg and some close friends of mine. i just- i just wanted to throw a party to be honest." during the small speech, you glance over to your right and see techno staring up at schlatt. he seemed to have that confused look in his eye, maybe wondering why he was at a party about government. you were wondering that same thing about yourself but even more so as schlatt never really knew you. you were never really around often, especially during the time of the election.

"chat, i'm not gonna do it. i'm literally surrounded by enemies.." your ear twitches, hearing techno muttering to the voices in his head. after a moment, he cheers, "woo party!"

quackity starts leading everyone to pokimane islands. everyone dances and cheers happily until niki and techno start talking about state secrets. "anyone wanna talk about state secrets?" techno asked not-so-subtly.

"you know for the fact that you're really smart, you're really unsubtle with getting private information."

"like you could do any better." 

"i can actually. you're talking to the pandora's box after all." you smiled smugly. "how do you think i know about your other base?" techno narrows his eyes at you as your smile turns innocent while you brush your hand against his arm. "i know a lot of things, mr. blade, i would hate to have to pull anything over your head."

after a while, fundy suggested to do a boxing match. "yeah violence! yeahhh!" techno is quick to cheer on as you follow along.

"promoting violence. hell yeah!" you sound just as monotonous as techno does while everyone gathers at the ring. 

nearly immediately, fundy is asking for a fight with techno. techno excuses himself for a moment. you watch the pink haired male fly with his trident to do something. you have some idea of what he's doing. just as fast as he flies away, he quickly arrives back and takes off his armor, setting it by you. "watch m' stuff f' me." his voice is a bit more gruffy as you raise an eyebrow upon noticing some familiar particles bubble around him. "don't look a' me like that."

you smiled, "hmm, mr. blade using a potion in a boxing match?" you talked quietly, humming in amusement. techno snorted, a telltale sign that a piglin was not very pleased. you laughed a bit, "don't be so mad, techno. i thought you were the mature one. i'm just pointing things out." techno is silent for a moment while you look at him. you would never say it to his face but he wasn't a bad sight to see or maybe it was just your piglin instincts to admire other piglins. you snort to yourself quietly, a sound that was close to a piglin admiring gold, but techno picks up on it.

"you seem to be admiring me. i am amazing so i get it." you laughed at bit upon seeing his smug smile as he faces you. 

"glad to see you're warming up to me now."

"i still don't trust you." he huffed.

"well, trust and warming up to someone is different. i can be an acquaintance. i don't need to be trusted. not yet at least." you hummed. "anyways go beat up fundy, pig man." he snorted at your statement as antfrost starts to count down.

and in just a few seconds, the fox is down and techno is victorious. "who's next!? who's next?!"

"techno, we're gonna have to initiate a drug test on you."

"can we wait 30- no, 29- 27 seconds until then?" you started to laugh watching as techno counts down his potion effect while he fumbles over his words. quackity and fundy seem to not accept that, asking techno for a drug test. but techno is quick to escape. "all of a sudden, i'm gone-" and he's flying before anyone else can say anything.

he does come back as another speech was gonna happen in a few moments. and yet this one gave you a bit of a sinking feeling..

"who am i to say no to that, right? so without further ado, i think i’ll put big man tubbo, my right-hand man, my uh… my protégé, up on the mic to spit some bars!" everyone cheers for tubbo as you clap for him as well. you almost frown upon seeing how he can barely reach the microphone. he's so young for this… him and tommy… you can only think to yourself, hearing his speech. words are being heard and yet you can't listen well enough. you knew what was going on. 

"so with that in mind, i'd like to thank everyone for coming to this wonderful event!" a deep chuckle fills your ears as tubbo's speech ends. "what- what's wrong schlatt?"

"i was just thinking about it. you know how we like to have fun, tubbo?" that sounds anything but good. you grip on your sword, something's gonna happen and you don't know if you have the guts to handle it right now. 

"yeah.. what- what's up schlatt?"

"you got anything else in that speech?" 

"uhhh no! on that note, let the festival begin!" after that all you see in quackity and schlatt whisper to each other and hand each other some bright yellow item. this was looking worse and worse as you watch the two surround tubbo with the paste and soon pouring water over the paste. it was now concrete. tubbo was stuck with no way out.

"what the fuck are they doing.." you muttered, feeling your anger rise. you can hear techno and niki mutter in confusion as they watch everything slowly unfold.

niki's pleas are unheard to schlatt as he speaks, "I know what you've been up to, tubbo."

"what- what have i done? what have i been up to? what are you talking about?" tubbo's eyes are glazed with fear and panic as his hands are pressed against the yellow concrete. he's trying to back up against the chair but he can't move any farther back.

shlatt laughs mockingly, "what i have been up to, he says.." and soon he's yelling, "he's been CONSPIRING with the idiots! with the tyrants! that we kicked out of this server! that we kicked out of this great country!" his voice was as loud and booming as you remember the past. when you escaped before the results were even out for the election, when you decided that this country was not what you wanted to stay in for very long. “i don’t know if you know this, tubbo but treason… isn’t exactly a respectable thing around here… y’know?”

“do you know what happens to traitors, tubbo?” the dark look in schlatt’s eyes have you gripping tighter on the worn out handle of your sword. the leather wrapped around the grip does nothing to help your bubbling anger. 

“n-no…”

“nothing good.” he stops looking at tubbo to look into the stunned crowd, “technoblade, why don’t you come up here?” your neck nearly snaps with how hard you turned to look at him. was he working for schlatt? you asked yourself for a moment before seeing how surprised and concerned he was, looking around and having no response to the president. techno glances at you for a moment. both of you seem hesitant on what to do but with an unsettling feeling in his stomach, techno tridents his way to the large stage podium. you can barely keep yourself focused on everything. the whispers of everyone around, the choking atmosphere, and knowing that tubbo might just be in danger of losing a life. your mind is fuzzy as you can’t listen to a word of what schlatt is saying. you can hear snippets but it doesn’t go through your mind. you hear nothing. but then you hear everything.

“take care of the traitor. take care of him.” schlatt’s graveled voice suddenly feels grating to hear.

“you want me to get him- get him some breakfast?” techno’s voice is muffled and yet so clear. 

“no…” niki’s cries are unheard as they’re overpowered by the shattering of your heart and the aching of your brain. you wished you could comfort her.

“he won’t. he won’t. he won’t! he’s on our side!” wilbur? when did he get here? how long has he been here? you’re getting rusty, old woman. you shouldn’t have retired, you idiot.

“techno, i need you to take him out.” take him out…?

“to dinner?”

“no! not to dinner! i want you to kill him!” schlatt’s voice screeches through the microphone as techno oh’s in realization. 

“techno, you don’t need to do this!”

“it’s- it’s a festival today schlatt…”

you can see him hold his crossbow. he’s gonna do it… he doesn’t have much of a choice. not when they don’t know that he’s with pogtopia. suddenly you’re aware of how surrounded you are, marburg citizens were all in the crowd. you were sure that if techno or you made a wrong move, you would both lose a life.

“i’m sorry tubbo.”

“t-techno?”

your mouth is dry, failing to say anything to help techno in this situation. the battle of the lake was different, it wasn’t this. at least with a battle, you didn’t need to think about what to do. but to be fair, it’s not like you even tried to do any thinking at the time. but either way, this wasn’t a battle. this was an execution.

“i will try to make this as painless and as colorful as possible, tubbo.” techno can only mutter but the mic just barely picks it up.

“technoblade…” 

“tubbo, i’m sorry! i’m being subjected to mild amounts of peer pressure.”

“DO IT TECHNOBLADE!”

with a yell, techno fires off the fireworks to tubbo. the thundering boom of the fireworks rings in your ears as you try and cover them to soften noise, just for a little bit. of course it didn’t help but there was nothing else you can think of doing. your feet frozen in place as you watch tubbo die. and soon everyone else would too. you can see the bloodthirst in techno’s eyes as he loads the bow again. so much was happening at once. tommy landed himself onto the podium in tears as he looks at where tubbo’s body lays. he was distraught at techno’s betrayal.

but techno could only see blood.

and you needed to run.

everyone who survived techno’s reign of fireworks is fleeing in panic, including yourself. you can only trip over your feet before using your own trident to get away, going in the same direction as techno while everyone was yelling to get tommy. why didn’t they bother with techno after killing so many citizens? that was something beyond your understanding really. the government ruling over manburg was a really bad one to say the least if they were doing such public executions. what a government that was.

taglist; @justahostaccount, @olyink,@aikochan4859, @classycookiebailiffstudent, @stickk-bugg, @goldensunshineshit, @sadlyitsme-boohoo, @2cuteforyourlies, @jace-the-ace12, @potenzel, @lvlyjuro, @kiinokochii, @anxiousnarwhale, @jaciahbabes, @lunna-does-real-doodle, @reeeeeeeeeebear, @iamsuchasimp, @morgan8or, @that-can-of-fizz, @sparesaber, @floprinceps, @spiralingtoinsanity, @imwaytootires, @dabbingintoart, @jadynchronicle, @v10dw4lk3r, @victory-is-here, @fromzeepewithlove

[taglist open until it's too much for me :')/hj]

[if you want to be added or removed, please click me]

[blookmallow]

Can you do a rating on child animatronics like you did with the clowns

i sure can

welcome to animatronic nightmare preschool

theres a trend ive discussed about spirit before where all their female animatronics tend to be either the “old hag” type, or “creepy little girl” - and now that im thinking about it i actually couldn’t think of any boy characters ive ever seen. i dont know why this is exactly. theres something to analyze there but im not really sure what it is. i found a few but almost ALL of them are little girls. i dont know what to say about this but i did notice it 

there IS a boy in this group though: 

ring around the rosie

enter the ritual 

just some nice kids having a fun time. it may be cliché at this point but i love the “spooky nursery rhyme” trope anyway (and y’know, ring around the rosie was already creepy to begin with. im not sure if the theory that it’s really about the black plague is actually true but its still highly questionable to include the line “ashes, ashes, we all fall down” in a childrens rhyme with no explanation either way) 

for some reason the fact that none of them have hands and its just their sleeves tied together is really funny to me and i dont know why. they also dont have feet and im not sure if its a technical limitation for convenience purposes or if they’re supposed to be little ghost children but it definitely comes across like they’re little ghost children who tied their sleeves together to try to feel like they’re holding hands which is very cute. 10/10 big fan of this one 

i already mentioned harriet hustle in this post, shes fantastic 

angeline

i LOVE this one shes SO cute

i dont really understand how she's supposed to be scary, the description is like "she'll scare the lights out of your guests" or w/e but like, she's just. a kid who can see ghosts. she herself isn't even a ghost. i like her id adopt her i think she'd be a fun addition to a graveyard scene 10/10

abandoned annie

ok technically this one is a doll but im counting her anyway, shes one of my FAVORITE spirit animatronics bc A) i love creepy dolls B) shes cute and most importantly C) her entire fucking face unhinges i need y’all to watch the video on this one its so good 12/10 ive said this before but animatronics that do something completely fucking unexpected are my absolute favorite 

broken girl 

completely batshit. horrifying. shes actually initially standing upright and then snaps backward and screams and the image does not do it justice i highly recommend the video for this one. not much there as a Character but as “really effective way to scare the shit out of someone” its, i would imagine, incredibly effective. 9/10

there’s also menacing molly who looks similar and has the same kind of “facing away from you but then snaps backward” scare but is on a swing and sings “I see dead people, I see ghosts 💖i see the things that hate you the most” before she does her jumpscare which is incredibly funny to me 

double trouble

creepy little girl trope meets creepy twins trope, at first glance i thought this was just like, discount grady twins (which it looks like they also have, in blatant knockoff form. they’re uh, not good) but it looks like their description backstory is that they killed their mother and disappeared with their rumored-insane father so its slightly different. one of their phrases is “daddy says we have to play outside :( he doesnt want any more blood on the floor” and i love it 

they have a pretty good sense of personality and character to them even if its not necessarily groundbreaking. 7/10

ellie hatchet 

i love this one bc so many of the creepy little girl animatronics are just pretty much standing there being creepy but not ellie. she’s fucking DONE with all of you. you come near her she will swing an axe at your face. 6/10 not really a big stand out but i appreciate her undying rage 

lunging lily 

shes spooky. she jumps out at you. thats about it. i dont really have anything to say about this one. that sure is a creepy little girl that jumpscares you. i like that she goes “help me... help me...” before she jumps out but i feel like it would be hard to get the timing right for that to actually work as a lure to make guests curious where the sound’s coming from since most of these are motion activated. anyway 6/10 shes just not very interesting 

johnny punk 

one of the rare boy characters, i have actually seen him in store and just completely forgot about him because he was that uninteresting. he doesn’t really do much and his backstory on site is just like, “He's got a nice house, loving parents and a severe attitude problem.” 

like this isn’t an undead child back for revenge against those who wronged him or a crazed circus runaway or anything. he’s just a bratty kid. hes like a 13 year old who just saw Joker and has decided to make it his entire personality. this comes across less as a threatening figure and more just like some shitty kid who thinks he’s cool. i glanced at the comments on the wiki page and it turns out absolutely everyone hates him which is completely hilarious to me 

2/10 nobody likes you johnny go do your homework and apologize to your mother 

i also found limb eating zombie boy, who is considerably better 

gross. bloody. would probably be pretty effective if you had him like, placed among some boxes or something so people dont see him at first and aren’t expecting him there. pretty standard zombie. i dont have much to say. He’s Fine. 6/10

mommy’s favorite

ive seen this one in the stores several times, I think we have her there now, and i just don’t. get it? she just moves back and forth with the “shhh” gesture and it’s like, ok, she’s vaguely creepy, but what’s going on here. she just says “don’t wake my mommy! she’s been sleeping for a long time!” so i guess the implication is that her mother is dead and she doesn’t understand, which is just sad rather than scary. the description says she makes mommy’s tea just how she likes it with five drops from the special skull bottle, which could imply she killed her mom, which would make more sense as a horror character, but if that’s How Mommy Likes It that implies the mother instructed her daughter to unknowingly poison her, which is horrifying but in a way darker sense than a spooky halloween prop lmfao 

anyway if i have to go digging into descriptions to try to figure out what this character is or what shes supposed to be or anything i just dont feel like its a very effective character design. and i did read it and i still dont really get it. 2/10 i just feel like im missing something here 

anyway there’s a bunch more variations of “scary possessed child” that are all basically the same, so im just gonna close this out with:

swinging skeletal boy 

allo there, guvna 

look at this dapper little victorian child im gonna cry he’s so cute 

he just swings but has this surprisingly endearing soft little voice which COMPLETELY contrasts the weird shit he actually says. hes this precious little skeleton kid with a sweet little voice who goes “your skin is so nice :) can i have it? haha. that’s okay. I’ll take it when you’re sleeping” 

absolutely love animatronics with that “wait WHAT did that thing just say” factor to them i love this guy 11/10 good boy my new son 

i would also like to mention that people are also continuing to dunk on johnny punk in this guy’s comment section too fsadkflj people hate that shitty joker kid so much their hatred has bled into other completely unrelated swinging children

[curious-menace]

Can you do headcanons of any Riddler getting cared for and gentle kisses from reader after getting beat up? He needs some loves.

SO I MAY HAVE SUGGESTED THAT MY ULTIMATE FANTASY IS TO GIVE RIDDLER A HUG WITH BACKRUBS AS HE TELLS ME ABOUT HIS DAY AND I STAND BY THAT WHOLE-HEARTEDLY .

i freaking love this stuff so im going to do all of them mwahahah

post asswoop riddlers getting loves

Arkham riddler

He’s VERY quiet, which knowing him and his inability to stop talking, is  bad news.

I paint arkham riddler as a cry baby and i stand by that. this is the hill i will die on. He’ll have dragged his sorry ass into your apartment or house , dripping blood on your floors but he wont bother calling for you. he’ll just sit at the table with his head in his hands having a lil pity party until you find him.

when you do finally get home, he’ll be looking like a kicked puppy. he’s gotten stuck in his own head, mentally beating himself up even more. he got a fright when you came in because he was so caught up he didn't even hear you at the door.

He’s literally sits there like a child with his arms up for you to come scoop him up. he’s not even sure why his first thought after getting beat up was to come here, he’s probably lead the cops here or something and that was so stupid and- you should probably give him a lil soft smooch on the head to stop him before he goes into a spiral.

he needs more emotional and mental care than physical. Talk to him while you're patching him up. any topic, it doesn't matter just keep him focused on your voice and not the one in his head calling him dumb.

he wont admit he wants to be held and coddled after something like this. get your softest blankie and 2 mugs of coco with marshmallows and just ramble at him. tell him about your day or ask him to explain something boring and complicated so he’s focusing on that rather than how upset he is. let him sit on your lap or between your legs on the sofa and watch how its made or mythbusters or something until he falls asleep. he should be ok again in the morning, he doesnt stay down for long. 

Blacklight Riddler

He’s used to getting his ass kicked, either by batman, the other rogues or once he’s a PI, by unhappy clients and the people he put away. He might be tiny but he’s pretty tough. 

even if he’s really hurting, his probably trying to crack jokes and tell blood and bruise related riddles. He doesn't like to see you worry so even if he’s in a lot of pain or a bit upset about things, he’s trying to make you smile.

he likes kisses on his bruises. even if he just banged his hand on the table he’ll come to you because he wants you to kiss it better. 

He’s a decent fighter, unlike a lot of riddlers who couldnt fight their way out of a paper bag. He can throw punches but he lacks in defence and with his bad knee, dodging can be a little hard. even if he wins the fight he’s still likely to need you to patch him up.

He likes kids plasters. like hello kitty and spongebob. no im not joking, he ALWAYS wanted them when he was little and his parents always said no. now he’s an adult he’s going to use them whenever he damn well pleases.

 if it was a particularly bad one, he’ll be ok in the moment even if he has to go to hospital. But he’s going to drop the facade at some point and let you see how upset he is. winding up in hospital after being beat was a common occurrence in childhood. even after doing it time and time again as an adult it doesn't make it any easier on him. he’ll want to stay in your bed, be close to you for few days until either he starts to heal or something snaps him out of his funk.

BTAS Riddler

he really prefers other people to do the fighting for him. well physically anyway. he can handle his own arguments...most of the time. He’s going to need you to nurse a bruised ego more than anything. he probably got dunked on my batman or crane and now he’s huffing.

i don't know if this counts as care and kisses but he clearly needs you around to keep his sorry ass alive. he hurt his side in a fight once and said he wasn't hurt. believable... until he started to act a little confused, a little dizzy. needless to say it worried you enough to take him to emergency care. 

He was obviously in agony by now but he was still fighting with you the entire drive there, insulting you and insisting he was fine. its a good job you took him when he did, turns out he’d ruptured his spleen and would probably be dead if you weren’t around to act like his common sense.

he still hasnt apologised for that. or any of the other times you insisted on medical care to stop him from pushing up daisies. he just pretends like you know he’s grateful so he doenst have to admit he’s bullheaded, stubborn and worst of all, wrong. 

if he has been seriously hurt, he acts more indignant about it than anything. he wants to be waited on and pampered while resting in bed. he can be a genuine pain to deal with, talking about how lucky you are to see him in such a vulnerable state and how you should be grateful he’s letting you do this for him.

He doesn't want to admit how much he actually needs you. his goons wont put up with him when he’s like this and he’s freaking paying them to do it. you do it for free and no matter how annoying he is you havent left him yet. he doesn't tell you but youve noticed he starts getting you more gifts about a week after he’s recovered. like its taken him a day or two to work out he should probably thank you for all you do.

Original Riddler

this riddler is just weird. like he gets a freaking hang nail and he pretends like he’s dying. but he could nearly lose a limb and he’ll say “tis but a scratch” and still try to hobble about like nothing is wrong.

actually he’s more like olaf “oh look i've been impaled.”. he probably tries to laugh off life threatening injuries like its nothing, taking maybe 3 steps before he collapses on his face in a blood puddle and lets out a tiny “help”

good luck moving his tall lanky ass around. better get a gurney and maybe those vets at the zoo who deal with giraffes. seriously if you want to take care of him you are going to need help or some sort of action plan and a go bag because with his limp butt this will not be easy.

he’s kinda like BTAS riddler in that he needs you to tell him the injury is serious. hes not dumb he just has a high pain threshold and genuinely doesn't realise that injuries are as bad as they are. 

he can be a bit of a baby while being patched up. he doesn't like a lot of blood or gore, it makes him feel a little sicky. better give him your phone to play with like a kid at the doctors or put the tv on for him to watch while you bandage  him. word of warning, he will pass out or throw up if you try to give him stitches.

i think you should focus your love and attention on him AFTER medical care. just focus on the job, be silent and as fast as possible to get it over with quickly. you should probably bring him something sweet too. no not just you, although you are sweet for looking after him. give him something sugary because he’s going to be light headed after seeing any blood. maybe you could give him a lolly for being a good patient. 

Telltale riddler

this riddler is essentially a metahuman. he can REALLY take a beating and bounce back fairly quickly. just look how many times batman punched him in the face and it barely stunned him! he doesnt usually need patched up after a fight. maybe just a lil smooch and some hugs

he did really need your help after the whole pact thing. having his friends abandon him hurt like hell, more than any physical injury ever could.

after that, he clings to you. almost obsessively so; we know he’s got some serious mental illnesses but he usually has the worst of it under control, even without meds. now? it seems like he’s experiencing ptsd and is afraid to go anywhere without you, like you might up and disappear if you arent in his line of sight at all times.

i think this riddler might need the most intense care from you. hugs and gentle reassurance wont be enough. you’re going to be responsible for taking him to therapy, keeping him taking his meds and grounding him to reality. this is the kind of responsibility you took on when you got involved with him but i doubt you realised how hard it would be. i cant promise it will all be worth it but i can promise he wont ever forget your kindness.

the kind of care he needs after such a hard knocking down is just stability. im not one for romance or any mushy gushy stuff but please just pour your love into the cracks in this poor mans soul.

its hard going, but he has his moments. his gallows sense of humor is still there and hey, after him being in and out and gone for so long, it might be nice to have him around more.  

Zero year riddler

INSUFFERABLE LITTLE SHIT THIS ONE. he could LITERALLY be bleeding out in your arms and he’d STILL be backseat driving on your medical skills. the temptation to just leave him there to bleed is INCREDIBLE.

he’ll drop the act eventually. he’ll ask and maybe even beg for your help. man has  no shame and all the self preservation instincts of a lemming. dont get me wrong, he can be a total coward some times, only looking out for himself . but when he’s actually hurt ? not a fuckin clue. does this head wound need an ice pack or heat pack? is this spurring blood wound worthy of medical care? no idea. he was a very sheltered child who never got so much as a bruise so he has no idea what to do when he’s hurt.

he gets the everloving shit kicked out of him on a clockwork basis. like you could hear knocking on your door at 3 am and already be at the table with a first aid kit like oh its tuesday riddler must have broken his nose.

he takes entirely too much joy in making you patch him up. youre starting to wonder if he’s doing it on purpose just to see you in your little apron and latex gloves . he’s getting off on this and you know it but god help you, you just  cant resist his dumb face asking for your help and would you also wear this pink nurses outfit while youre at it?

one time he lost a LOT of blood. he would be fine but he was pretty damn loopy from lightheadedness. while you were trying to get him into bed to rest he started flirting with you. can you believe the audacity? he’s lost 3 pints of blood and he’s still more focus on his libido? 

he’s actually going to be both humble and grateful for your help when he finally comes round. dont get me wrong, he’s still a bit of a prick but at least he says thank you for saving him before he demands you kiss all his booboos and ouchies. 

nonnie i am having a stroke. i was trying SO hard to just pick one but i COULDNT because i am WEAK for hurt and comfort.

theres a reason i have a tag that literally says “i have naughty hands and no self control”

someone needs to stage an intervention

got something you wana talk about? send me an ask or a dm! im always game to talk about our favorite curious menace 💚💜

[whirlibird]

fgo fate for your fandom ask?

ALRIGHT HELL YEAH LETS GO. THE CAST IS MASSIVE BUT I WILL DO MY BEST.

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most) - LANCELOT. berserker lancelot in particular. enjoyment of his lore is enhanced by arthuriana fun facts my friend gave me and that i found while diving thru his wikipedia pages. raised by the lady of the lake. a damp, watery mary sue of a man blessed with beauty and martial skills but doesnt know how to cope with interpersonal difficulties at all. perfect knight but his main method of dealing with any problem that cant be solved by Sword is to promptly go insane and then run naked into the woods. an ideal man. emotionally fragile! i want to shatter him like glass! i think fate is the only adaptation of lancelot that really leans into his tendency towards hysteria but unfortunately they kinda waste it. making his insanity because arthur forgave him and therefore he couldnt forgive himself is.....kinda meh? ive got opinions about it. anyway this has gone on long enough. last thing: if theres anything else i wish fgo would do with him, its either 1. galehaut or 2. his susceptibility to being kidnapped by various women

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped) - jack. i am wrapping her up in a giant fluffy winter coat as we speak. she is going to wear so many layers that she is practically a sphere.

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave) - theres so many underused characters with squandered potential in fgo lmao. i cant really think of one right now - i think i'd have to say nezha - theres a lot more they can do with her, i think.

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week) - moriarty is by no means obscure, and he pops up all the time, but. every time he does i fuckin lose it. also shoutout to chen gong. again not obscure at all considering how busted he is gameplay wise, but i do want him to appear in actual story stuff more often, bc he's fucking hilarious

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave) - this is also a major blorbo. shoutout to archer emiya. god's perfect housewife. born to cook forced to kill. this is a twofer, i think, because u cant love archer without also loving shirou (i mean guess you can but :/ whack) emiya theme lets fucking GO. i dont know how to explain why i love him so much without citing like.....the entirety of fsn. he's allowed to cause problems on purpose because he is sad </3

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason) - izo. he's so mad all the time. i dont think this quite counts, but im putting in ryouma and oryou as the plinko. i could watch izo being pinged around by them emotionally for hours. just bouncing around like a windows screensaver.

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell) - archer gilgamesh. considering he already got dunked in the world's evils and just came out even more naked than before i think he'll be fine. he is getting launched into turbohell more for his many, many crimes than being gay, but he is also gay.

honorary mentions: - salieri, who was the reason i started fgo in the first place bc his whole everything is so deranged in such a fun way

- quetzalcoatl. love her so much but why is she white

[the-bjd-community-confess]

More Divaz confos

Mod: Round two of these, previously: link. There’s some interesting customer reviews in this batch (5 and 8) which may be useful to readers.

1.Vic3mage "the secret bjdivaz vip group is just pictures of boxes coming in and going out". Yeah, between the bitching about d0llshe, asking people to post on doa for them, dunking on ex-customers, posting pics of random doll parts that they can't identify which doll they're supposed to go with, whining about how little money they make, whining when ppl e-mail them, whining. Yeah, other than that it's just boxes, and alpacas u can buy off amazon anyway lol.

~Anonymous

2.The butthurt users crying and guilttripping under every Divaz confession who have never been seen before elsewhere on this blog are extremely unsuspicious and unproblematic and definitely unconnected to Divaz and unbiased in every possible way

/s

~Anonymous

3.idk shit abt bjd1vas but v1cemage i can absolutely tell you the shit about ch0o is 100% accurate, fucker's got a long, long history of being an awful little man that stretches well beyond his involvement in the doll community. between the two i'd still trust bjd1vas over ch00 ch00 the fool any day!

~Anonymous

4.The Z3st and Div4s thing is really silly and both entities were being shady but did they really have to take the DZ waiting room down with them? :( He had even made a separate thread about it......

~Anonymous 

5. RE: BJD Divaz

I’ve been a customer of BJD Divaz since they first started, when it was only run by Chart3rline. I even contacted other BJD companies trying to persuade them to work with Divaz as their US representative. Most declined because they didnt like D's commission fee, but I was able to persuade a few of them.

I asked them to purchase a doll off DOA because I couldnt afford the asking price, and while they did, I found out later that instead of agreeing to purchase the seller's price, they negotiated the price to be lower. This significantly cheaper price was not passed down to me. I paid the full price +the commission fee based on that full price. I am disappointed I was not told this. This is when I stopped viewing them as a "friend" and instead, as a business. I dont hold this against them, it’s context to what Im going to say later.

I’ve stopped purchasing from D after my recent order from them. This company usually takes 3 or less months to make a doll. I’ve ordered the doll from D and it took 11 months. They let me know it arrived to them in March and that it will be shipped soon, except it only shipped on July, and only after I sent them several "reminder" emails. Before people in the comments try to put the blame on me for not sending a reminder soon, please keep in mind that I acknowledged the email in March and confirmed everything and they keep stressing to not send them emails because they are busy, I’ve emailed once every month since. I’ve since switched to ACBJD and Ive been happy with communication and the dolls ordered. I imagine ACBJD gets the same amount of emails, but they dont berate their customers if they email more than once.

I regret when people wanted a D0llshe, but not deal with him, I always recommended D. I would warn people of ordering directly and instead go through D. They assured buyers they would be handling communication and all the efforts so they wouldnt worry, except they didn’t. A person that I’ve recommended D to, who surpassed 2 years, keeps messaging me for help because D wouldnt reply to their emails. She is respectful, sweet and a timid person, not a Karen. This person, emailed D without a reply so would email a week later, only to be told that their email would be pushed down to the bottom if emailed again. No response, so she goes to FB and IG, who both tell her to email because they arent the person running orders. Finally got a response that they would get their refund, after D0llshe sends D's payment, but minus the PP fees. 3 months later and theres no refund, only a promise of them getting it later. Why is the customer missing out on fees when they have no doll? Customer emails d0llshe and he says he cant offer refund, because they didn’t order through them, which is understandable, but when all options are out for a customer, do you blame them for chargebacks?

If anyone files a chargeback, D will be blacklisting them from every company they rep, as in blacklisting you from buying direct from those companies. I urge everyone who has negative experiences with D to email the companies they rep instead of venting on confession blogs, and writing your experiences on social media. Make it count and send letters to the companies they represent, and please provide proof because they will try to make you out to be a liar.

Speaking of, they made vague posts on cl0ver singing for charging paypal fees, and that they offer guarantees as an official dealer, except when offering refunds, to non delivered products I might add, they are keeping the fees, and offered no help with d0llshe, even before they ended their dealership with them. Someone on DOA was told to not email them unless the wait time surpassed 1.5 years. They are even so petty that they post screenshots with the full name and address (dox) of the customer on purpose and then delete it out a day later as if they just realized their "mistake".

Before you try to make excuses for them about the fires, keep in mind, I am dealing with a business. The lower price negotiation with the DOA sale, I am in no way obligated to give them a pass or treat them as a friend when they made it clear that our relationship is strictly business. Their issues, are not my issues. D0lk got dragged for not shipping in time, others, including artisans, got dragged for being so late with communication and sending back refunds for cancelled orders. Why does D get to be exempt?

The supporters are the worst part of this, because of instead of being honest so D can improve, they support them for being "real". For example, look how micemage words it, to make it seem like this criticism is from one person, when there are people on addicts who didn’t have good experience. Check the bjd dealers tag here, you will see the supporters in the comments going off on any and all criticism of D. Some have sane comments, but the majority are cult like and try to identify the person venting as if it’s one person. Addicts deletes threads with criticism asking people to instead direct it to their feedback group; which lets be honest, no one is going to do because its "not that bad", and most dont want to join a new group, which is mostly dead.

This is my first and last confession on D, I’ve emailed each company they rep and told them my experience as well as contacting the 3 month wait company, with screenshots of my order, how they handled it, and the excuse they used to put blame on the company for being so late (package arrived march to D, 4 months to be shipped is on D, not the company). I’m not using company or order details because I know they are petty enough to try to identify me and publicly shame me like they have to others. This and the threat of suing is why not many people like to go public with their experience. They just keep feedback neutral, move on and never deal with again.

~Anonymous

6. Listen, I can't take you seriously in regards to BJD!vas because you're posting on a confession blog. If you were serious, you would have posted in buyer beware groups, DoA reviews or the board to get things resolved, or you would have made a complaint to the BBB. And your language makes you come off more as someone with an agenda rather than someone who is trying to warn people. If shipping is the issue, stop buying with standard shipping and pay the extra price for express shipping. I saw one of you complain that it sat with them for 20 days; that's probably because you're not the only one and they more than likely have a queue to check and then ship out. Do mistakes happen? Yes, because we're human. I've been in this hobby for a few years now and it seems like most people know you're going to have to wait, sometimes even outside the expected wait time. And shipping something as big as a doll is a timely endeavor. I shouldn't have to say that.

My point is simply to stop complaining on an confession board and either take it to the places previously mentioned. Posting here behind the anonymous mask makes you sound like a petulant child who didn't get their way right away.

~Anonymous

7.My only issue with BJD Divaz is how I never get any updates. Every email, they tell me to join their facebook page for status updates. I dont have a FB and I dont want to create one. I bought my doll through their website, updates should be posted on their website, or they could send me an email. That isnt asking much.

~Anonymous

8. Since there seems to be a lot of either "completely negative everything sucks" or "everything was sunshine and rainbows" confessions about bjd!vaz I thought I'd chime in with a neutral review.

PROS

-They were always polite and professional in their emails, and gave me very detailed answers to my questions.

-I got exactly what I ordered, so no mix ups or missing parts or anything like that.

-I think them being forthcoming about personal issues (only one person on staff, illness, the flooding isue etc.) on social media is good, since it keeps customers updated as to why there might be delays.

-If you live in the US their shipping is very reasonable.

CONS

-Reply times were varied. Sometimes it could take over a week, sometimes a couple hours.

-My order took about 10mo which, when comparing to other people who ordered through the same company around the same time, was about 3x as long as if I bought it direct and 2x as long if I had gone through a different dealer. I get some of the waiting time is out of their control, but it was kind of ridiculous.

-They dont necessarily ship the same day they send you a tracking number. I wish they said something like, "Here's your tracking number, our pickup is Xday so it should start moving after that" just so I could be aware.

All in all no major complaints. I got my doll and all that. Their lone employee is clearly overwhelmed. I hope they hire another person, if only to give the one a break.

Truthfully, I most likely won't buy through them again. I'd rather pay the international shipping and go direct, than deal with the extensive wait time. I'd still recommend them to someone looking for a very long layaway, though. I paid in full, but if I had a 12mo layaway I would've never known they weren't ready to ship my doll until month 10.

~Anonymous

[a-slut-for-smut]

what are your top 10 relationships in aot?

Hmm very interesting question anon- thanks for asking! Idk if i can really rank them since i only have the one OTP, but i can certainly give my 2 cents on the most popular pairings, according to the interwebs.

2 things to keep in mind:

i dont hate/dislike any pairing. I dont care enough to waste energy doing so. I like what i like, other people like what they like- simple as that, i cant understand why its so hard for ppl to grasp this concept

You may be wondering about my recent tag usage because ive been tagging a lot of diff ships- mainly for my anti-SNK139 shitposts. Just had a wild idea that maybe- JUST MAYBE, we could all put aside our differences and just have a laugh at our shared misery. Because idk how any of us are supposed to be happy with this ending. I mean, upon reflection I see what Isayama was going for, but idk its just tough to swallow unlike Levi's fun juice. Which, in my opinion, should be taken as a compliment- the man set the bar so high with the previous arcs that our expectations were thru the roof despite a rushed final arc, and he just...missed the dunk? Anyway hot take, i know.

Ok i digress- to the ask, in no particular order:

Levihan

Cute ship, very fluffy. Who doesn't like best friends to lovers trope? And theres no denying they have mutual respect for each other, which is a huge kink of mine. Honestly, its hard for me to ship a pairing if it isn't evident. That said, does this pairing get my ovaries going? Eh, not particularly but i still likies

Erehisu

I was behind this ship mainly because i was sold on Eren's "Walter White" villain arc. What better catalyst for a dramatic change in character than if their child was involved? The idea that Eren went full Hitler because he got Historia preggers and wanted the child to grow up in a "free" world? What parent wouldnt sell their soul for that goal, given the world they live in? And Historia- grappling with the knowledge/morality of Eren's plan but for the sake of the child? Prime for character development. Not to mention all the blatant crumbs. But Isayama went NOPE.

Eremika

Oh boy. So, firstly, i would have readily accepted this ship if Isayama laid off the one-sidedness a bit. But he didnt. And while im sure there are instances that can be interpreted as mutual affection, i dont see how that excuses all the times Eren snapped at her/just generally annoyed with her attentions. Like, we dont know his POV at all until the very end which retroactively you can say, oh he didnt want to cause her future pain? But by then its too late for US. And in the end (im not clear on this tho/too lazy to check) was it ever made clear to Mikasa that he reciprocated her feelings? Im prob biased/self-projecting here, but I would NOT have stuck around on the off-chance that the dude is faking his disinterest?? Even if he did save my life and is my childhood friend! You dont owe someone love because of that, but because of how you mutually treat one another. Anyway i woulda taken the fucking hint and moved onto Levi's dick, i would never put up with that nonsense

Eruri

These 2 are bonded, to say the least. They hold each other in high regard and i love that about any ship. Good stuff.

Ereri

Doesn't do much in the ovary-dept for me relationship-wise, but man, this ship is popular for a reason. The fanart for this ship is TOP TIER 

Yumihisu

Again, they regarded each other highly and theres no denying they deeply cared for one another. Sometimes love doesnt give a shit what genitals you happen to have, why cant ppl understand this? We all got hearts and souls, that counts for something??

Aruani

The energy for this ship is a little tepid for me. Maybe because her ass was stuck in a crystal 70% of the story, but i liked pre-crystal annie alot. If anything, i preferred her dynamic with Eren more, mainly because Eren respected her so much and she contributed a lot to his character growth in the first arc. Just my preferred dynamic for a ship. Also she kicked his ass so much i was beginning to think he was into it

Jeankasa

Dont mind it at all. I think it lacks a certain degree of intensity that i prefer in my ships, but theres def mutual respect there and im all for it.

Jeanpiku

Thought this was a cute ship that came to bloom in the later chapters. its intriguing dynamic- falling in love with the (former) enemy kind of way.

Rivamika

Uh. Where to start. Actually i wont because this post is long enough as is. Just peruse my blog if you're actually curious ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[hello-imasalesman]

Better late than never! Forgot to post these earlier. Chapter 4 notes behind the cut, in chronological order:

-““I won’t be a crone at thirty,” she says, though sounds thoroughly unconvinced as soon as such a large, decrepit number leaves her sixteen year old mouth.” = self dunk. the years start coming and they don’t stop coming

-derby has surprise passed Pinky off numerous times and most of the time bif is just surprised pikachu face that Derby’s voluntold him what to do.

-I love Gord so much. gord is literally defcon five trying to get out of this fucking room before pinky eats his ass alive. I think only Bif and Derby can really withstand her tantrums

-“Does this random ass jock even know who Derby, Derby Harrington, does he even KNOW who DERBY HARRINGTON IS!” Bif baby girl the only person who cares about Derby is like, you. And the preps. And maybe a few others. You are so obtuse YOU ARE SO IN LOVE AHHH

-I LOVE Kirby and I also love the fact that he has the weirdest fucking voicelines. The feet shit is canon. Or maybe one of the rumors that gets passed around by the non-clique kids. Either way. poor Trent :’)

- bif “huh, none of these straight romance stories appeal to me. is it because I’m not a girl? That’s it :)” taylor-tremblay

-piiiiinnnkkkkkky

-PIIIIIIIIINNNNNKKKKKKKYYYY

-it was really important to me that Pinky doesn’t get fridged in any way for this, because she’s very much set up for it and it’s the easy way out. Her and Bif share a lot of camaraderie dealing with Derby; they’re friends, not enemies. And even separate from Derby, I think Bif’s also a boy she feels safe around (namely, because he’s very, very gay, not that he realizes it yet) and Pinky is a girl which he doesn’t have to pretend to be straight around because she’s “derby’s girl”, and that dynamic is kind of rare at Bullworth, really.

-bully is hilarious bc every dog always wants to jump your ass, which has translated into me immediately honing in on dogs and curb stomping them, lest he comes over to bite my ankle and make me go hunt someone kissable down to refill the health meter. When people who dont play bully watch you just run up to a dog who just looks like he has the zoomies and plant your foot straight into its head you definitely get some looks

-so lets start my most indulgent scene ever with a mean girls reference.

-aquaberry smells like holister/ Abercrombie but specifically the way it smelt when you were 13 roaming the mall unsupervised and feral and yearning.

-random but a thing that is weirdly dear to me about bully is that EVERY character has a name. mr Carmichael is the aquaberry store associate. There are no unnamed mooks. they dont make em like that anymore…. golden age of free roam third person rpgs…. :’)

-*head in hands* they’re so in love and they’re so fucking stupid

-this line makes me want to cry. the intimacy of it. every morning starts w him.

-So. The nanny line. It’s canon, but I hesitated counting this line to mean anything other than the joke it was intended to be back in 07, when a few years earlier Mary Kay Letournou got married and South Park had a kindergartener date their female teacher. there was a weird cultural period in the 00s i distinctly remember where real life instances of male children being prayed on by female caretakers was in the forefront and openly? ridiculed? when it’s not a joke. (And it goes hand in hand w the misogyny of the 00s, the thrashing gasps of gender roles pushing back w mocking of ‘metrosexuals’ and etc etc. you know. if someone hasn’t written a thesis on this yet for their modern American pop culture history class or whatever someone needs to. ) if you want to count R* line as satire, it’s hamfisted at best, poor taste at worst. but I’ll take it seriously; i’ll eat the onion, so to speak. for intensely personal reasons, but also because I do think it explains a lot about Derby in both canon and my interpretation of him, and im confident enough that I can do it justice :)

- an amaryllis kind of looks like a daffodil (bulb flower), and means pride in flower language

- gords interest in bif this chapter (and not that they’re not friends, but Bif is only an ok conversationalist and not a gossip, so he’s not always Gord’s first choice to hang) was spurned on by Bif’s outburst in the last. The anger and all. Except, Gord doesn’t realize the defensiveness comes from the shared being poor thing w Bryce but the other secret bif keeps close to his chest :’)

-derby as meat Carrie…..

-for being a fighting game I can’t believe it took this long for a fighting scene. And I really wanted one scuffle as opposed to boxing, which is similar but has its own set of rules and terms

-the next (sigh) two chapters are mostly gut wrenching and pulse ratcheting but I want to end this on a high note w my favorite thing ever:

getting to write the word “fart knocker” in a story that will also hopefully make you tear up at least once

[spookyvalentine]

💫, 🌻, 🌼, and 🌺 for Mercy?

💫What is your favourite fact about this character and why?

I don’t know if I’ve got a favorite because I love mercy too Much, but. that they've got this enviable easiness to their physicality. think about the kid when you were in high school that was just like. effortlessly capable and athletic. always comfortable. the type that made ugly basketball shorts and soccer shorts look good. and when they land some ridiculous slam dunk, then looks for you and dimples like it was nothing? get the fuck out.

So like. yeah, when theyre bopping along to something with a good beat they’ve got dorkass lil goofy moves. but shit. they can dance. (also here’s the thing. mercy loves folk dances. catch ‘em twirlin your grandparents round the townhall floor)

🌻 What little things do they notice about people or the world around them that make them happy? What tiny little treasures do they find in the normal every day that makes the world seem a little brighter for them?

mercy takes a lot of pictures. of moss growin up trees. flowers, birds, bugs. food, produce stands, buildings, cars. tshirts that made them laugh

while on noveria, shepard stopped to snap pictures of indoor plants, comfortable looking office chairs, geth while they’re still shooting at us commander (and cracking open a lot of safes, Jesus, shepard—) anyway. the next morning Ashley stumbles into the kitchen and sees Shepard already at the table with coffee, buttering a hot muffin and scrolling through their omnitool. They’re reading about all the things they’d photographed the day before. It turns into a space Wikipedia spiral

🌼 Who are this characters friends and found family? How did they meet, how long have they been friends for, could they ever be something more than just friends? What do they look for in a friend or a romantic partner?

kasumi was their first ride-or-die. still is. the two of 'em met at vaguely fifteen in san francisco. mercy got to know kasumi's insanely badass cat burglin' grandmama, leaves the reds because of her, was there for the vinny fiasco at seventeen... two lil criminal peas in a pod. their cackles synch up and feed off each other--'heckle and jeckle,' kasumi's grandmama called them. then at eighteen mercy risks stowing away to the arcturus station on a personal vendetta and is arrested by anderson. they dont see each other again until me2.

before kas were the henry's, royann and jo ellen, and those two women had a profound impact on mercy's life (and their name!) although mercy inevitably makes their way to new orleans for a stay at juvie. once out, the reds take mercy in, support them in new orleans and then takes em out to San Fran

after kas, shepard becomes anderson's ward. they have a rocky start (he did arrest the kid!) but mercy falls into the habit of sending him little tchotchkes during their assignments (did they steal it? was it bought?), and he's the first one they call after akuze. even though they're not legally required to spend their holidays with each other any more, they go scuba diving together still, and are pretty close by the time me1 rolls around

for mercy, the questions to meet as a friend are: are you funny? are you interesting? they don’t need to trust you (only close friendships is it necessary). for the longest time the only thing past friends was wheres the body youre calling me at 3 am friends or you'd been filed under: my child

of the normandy crew (and not counting “the children”), id say their favorites are, in no order: wrex, mordin, chakwas, edi, vega, samara, zaeed and joker

romance is new. it's.. it's really good. mercy is so enthralled by thane they’re left a little bewildered. it’s taking them a while to catch up. they’ll get there. boy howdy do they

🌺 What does your OC do to calm down when they’re scared or after a nightmare? Do they have any special comfort items or need to be reassured by a specific person? How do they handle this if they’re alone?

they don’t need one specific person, but usually won’t turn away company. mercy’s used to handling things on their own. mercy will roll out their mat and practice. sometimes a crewmate joins them and it’s really nice—acroyoga always ends with laughter. if it’s bad, 108 sun salutations. reeeally long shower. break something down into its components. sparring with thane on sleepless nights has been um. really interesting. build a model ship. clean out the inbox n reply to emails.

starting before me1, some nights you’d see the commander drinking (usually tea, sometimes stronger) putting together jigsaw puzzles, and people join them. It can be quiet, private, real late night two heads bent over colored tiles trying to find the right words to fit together or there’ll be a rowdy crowd drunkenly cheering and jeering over the table. it becomes the puzzle table. sometimes crew will add a piece as they walk by. Adams hangs the finished pieces all over the ship

[pandastern]

Gravity (Bakugo x OC)

Part 4: Different Convictions (past)

Bakugou x Vigilante!OC

Warnings: angst, explicit language, violence

Word count: 2433

Genre: enemies to lovers ; angst ; romance

When a new student makes an entrance, Bakugou has a real bad feeling. There is something about this girl that just doesnt feel right. From the flaming hair to the calculating glint in her green eyes, everything about her just pisses him off.

Little does he know that his fate is intertwined with the person he despises so much, defining his future path in a way he would have never expected.

“Fuck…”

Artemis sat in the courtyard at the back of the school, her arms dipped into the cool water of the decorative fountain UA had built to make the space more… decorative.

The cool water soothed the growing ache in her body. Her arms and hands, in particular, hurt from the overuse of her quirk. Artemis sighed deeply. In her head, the fight played again and again. She had lost control. She had become so close to breaking the rules she had given herself. Disgust spread through her gut until she felt like she had to gag.

No, she couldn't let that happen ever again. 

“Artemis?” The low, rumbling voice of her homeroom teacher made her flinch.

“Mr Aizawa.” She sighed and shook her head, dunking her arms deeper into the cold water.

Aizawa narrowed his eyes at his new student. He could clearly see the burns on her skin. “So...are you just going to sit there, sulking like a child, or are you going to tell me what happened there?” he said, sighing deeply, his lazy drawl making his voice deeper. “If your arms are burned, you need to see Recovery Girl.”

“No, I'm fucking fine. I don’t need help, thank you very much. Leave me alone,” Artemis hissed through gritted teeth.

“Ah, I see,” Aizawa replied dryly. “It's practically normal to forcefully rip out a whole school’s water supply in mere seconds.”

Sitting down next to her, he crossed his arms and gave Artemis a stern look. Her eyes flickered up to him, a myriad of emotions passing through those green orbs. Suspicion, anger, fear… He had seen these kinds of eyes before.

“Miss Moon, I’m giving you one last chance to tell me. I won’t ask again.”

Her jaw clenched. Aizawa kept his unflinching eyes on her, studying every movement. Finally, she let out a ragged breath.

“Yeah well… I got angry. I lost control. Shit happens!” she growled, evading his gaze. “Are you going to expel me? Give me detention?”

Her last words sounded more like a challenge than anything else. So much defiance in such a small body.

“No. Here at UA, we dont expel students for accidents,” Aizawa responded. “The principal won’t be pleased and the school will be without water for a while, but what is the city’s tax money is for.”

With a sigh, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a can of iced coffee from one of his pouches, opening it casually and taking a sip.

“In any case, it wasn’t just a one way attack. Rest assured that Bakugou will be reprimanded for his reckless behavior, as well. Whether you like it or not, if you want to be a hero, you will have to learn how to work and rely on others, even If you don’t see eye-to-eye with them.”

“Eye-to-eye? Sure, that’ll happen.” Artemis scoffed and looked up at him. “Relying on others... Funny you should say that considering you prefer to work alone, Eraserhead.”

Ah. So she had done her research before coming to this place. 

“Regardless, I am able to work with my colleagues seamlessly should the need arise. A hero has to be able to do both. If you can’t, you die. Simple as that.”

Aizawa could clearly tell that this stubborn girl in front of him wouldn’t crack. Not now, anyway. He sensed that there was something lingering under the surface of those deep green eyes that were way too old to belong to a 15 year old girl. He sighed.

“In any case, I would prefer that an incident like this does not happen again. The paperwork is horrendous. Am I understood, Miss Moon?”

Artemis swallowed and nodded. Shadows passed through her eyes, as if she’d just evaded grave danger. “Yes, sir. Sorry… about the pipes.”

Aizawa nodded and got up with a groan. “All right. Get yourself cleaned up and go home. Tomorrow won’t be any easier.”

As he walked away, he couldn't help but shake his head. There was something so strange about this girl, but he couldn't put his finger on it yet. He would have to keep his eyes on her in the future. For now, though, he had to prepare the rescue training trip the school had planned for his class for tomorrow.

Artemis sighed and ran her fingers through her hair. The sensation of the shaved side of her head still felt so incredibly unfamiliar to her. After her fight with Bakugou, she’d tried to save what was left, but she’d ended up having to finally admit to herself that the only thing she could do was shave off the burnt hair and give herself an undercut. 

Class 1A was currently boarding a bus to an external training facility. The flame-haired girl watched as their class rep Iida ushered every single student into the vehicle with ridiculous hand gestures while continuously blowing into his coach whistle like a caricature of a flight attendant. Artemis couldn't help but roll her eyes. It wasn’t that Iida was a bad person - in fact, he was as straight cut as a hero could be - but the boy was so much of a stickler it was tiring. 

When it was her turn to board, she let herself fall into the seat next to Kaminari and Sero and stared out of the window. She’d managed to lose herself in thought, when the scent of burnt sugar and nitroglycerin suddenly flooded her senses. Great.

“Heh, nice hair cut,water hazard,” came the smug, taunting voice of Bakugou Katsuki.

A quiet groan escaped her lips and she looked up. Crimson eyes stared down at her in a silent challenge. Hadn’t he had enough already?

“Ah, what a glorious day for you to remind everyone what a giant piece of shit you are. Congratulations, boom boom boy,” she replied with the sweetest smile she could muster. “Don’t worry, we know! No need to prove yourself.”

If looks could kill, she would have been dead this instant.

A small smirk tugged at the corners of her lips. Artemis would have thought that getting almost shot in the face should have been enough to deter him from any further attempts to get a rise out of her. Seemed like she was wrong, though she’d be lying if she said she was disappointed.

“Tch. You little… I'm gonna kick your ass!” Bakugou spat.

“Oh, really?” Artemis chuckled. “That’s funny, considering that I wiped the fucking floor with your sorry ass yesterday.”

Ah, there it was. The blood vessel at Bakugou’s temple. Artemis couldn't help but smirk.

“You just got fucking lucky! Next time I’m gonna break you in half, trust me,” the ash blonde growled with gleaming eyes.

“Move along. No fighting on the bus. And hurry, we don’t have all day.” Aizawa’s voice cut through the tension before Artemis could retort.

As Mr Anger Issues walked along, grumbling something under his breath, Artemis rolled her eyes again. She really wasn’t in the mood for this today.

“God, I hope this guy gets diarrhoea for the rest of his goddamn life,” she muttered, directing her gaze towards the window again.

A snort next to her caught her attention. Kaminari gave her a mischievous wink and nudged her and Sero in a conspiring way

“You mean… explosive diarrhoea?” he snickered.

The image of that cracked Artemis up. “Well, as a quirk, it would suit him even better.”

“Ahem!” Aizawa’s warning voice cut them off.

“S-sorry, sir…” Kaminari muttered and scratched the back of his head.

Artemis sighed. There were a few things that she’d have liked to say, but she knew that Aizawa would be so quick to get on her back that it wasn’t worth it. At least at this moment.

“So, rescue training, huh?” Sero started in an attempt to change the subject. “I’m pretty sure they’re gonna divide us into teams again, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, I think so, too. Artemis, you haven’t been in our other training sessions. Are you excited?” Denki asked, giving her a flirty wink.

Artemis chuckled softly. “Well…” She considered how best to word her response. “I’m… curious to see how it’s gonna work. Teamwork is always a challenge. It depends on who you’re in a group with, and who you’re up against.”

“That's true. Personally I’d rather not get paired up with Bakugou or Todoroki,” Sero said with a sigh.

“Ungh, yes,” Denki chimed in. “Don’t get me wrong, they are super hard hitters. But Bakugou is, well, Bakugo, and Todoroki freezes your ass If you're not useful. Bet you I’m gonna end up with one of them.”

That made artemis perk up. “Freeze you? So, ice powers… That is interesting. If I were paired up with him, I could most likely use his quirk as ammunition,” she said more to herself than to the boys next to her.

“I wouldn’t press my luck if I were you. He’s… not a team player. If you're not up to his standard and deemed useless, he’s gonna consider you dead weight and take you out,” Sero said, scratching the back of his head.

“Well, I’m not good at many things, but I certainly ain’t useless in a fight,” Artemis scoffed. “Though I do share his sentiment. Someone who can’t pull their weight in a fight is a liability. Taking them out of the equation is the easiest way to ensure success.”

“Damn, that’s… kinda badass?” Denki said a little nervously. “I didn't pick you for a solo player…”

Artemis shifted in her seat so she could face the boys next to her better. She could clearly see the naive sentiment in their eyes. Usually, the wide-eyed believed that teamwork made the dream work and everything was gonna be all right with ‘friendship’. Not exactly something she could ever understand.

“It’s not badass, it’s common sense,” she said, crossing her arms. “I’m not dying just because someone can’t pull their own weight. The mere wish of wanting to help without the skill to do so does more harm than good. So, best to get out of the way and let those who actually don’t mind getting their hands dirty do the work. This isn’t a game. You either fight and win, or you die. And a dead soldier is a useless soldier. Simple as that.”

That she even had to spell that out to a group of people who were set on becoming the future heroes of tomorrow made her blood boil. The oh-so-familiar steel inside her soul stiffened her posture and she sighed.

“Heroes nowadays spouting about teamwork and ‘oh, happy friends, let’s work together to create a dream’ is utter nonsense, if you ask me. It’s too easy to forget that this isn’t a popularity game. It’s a job. A job that can cost lives if it isn’t done right. No-one gives a fuck about how popular you are if you can’t do your job. Teamwork is only sensible if it’s beneficial for every party involved. It has to be result-oriented. Teamwork just for the sake of teamwork is stupid.”

Artemis ran a hand through her hair and directed her gaze out of the window again.

“That’s why I prefer to work alone. I know my abilities and I know myself. It’s nothing personal.”

The sudden uncomfortable silence that spread around her was something Artemis had not expected. Had she said something wrong? Looking back at Kaminari and Sero, she frowned. Both of them stared at her with their mouths slightly agape.

“What?” Artemis asked, confused. “Why are you both looking at me like I kicked a puppy in the face?”

“Dude,” Kaminari began, clearing his throat. “That’s… kinda harsh? Is that how you work over there in Europe?”

“Yeah… I mean, we are classmates. We gotta stick together. Who can we rely on if not on our friends?” Sero asked.

Artemis sighed again. “That's exactly what I meant. Yes, we’re classmates, but what does that really mean? Teaming up should essentially be dependent on the skills of each party that can work together to accomplish a goal. Whether you’re classmates or not has no part in it. For educational purposes, it might make sense, but in the real world, teaming up just for convenience will most likely turn deadly.”

“Sounds to me like you’re either scared shitless and don’t trust anyone, or you think you’re better than everyone else and arrogant enough to believe no-one can match you,” Bakugou interjected with a nasty smirk from his seat down the bus.

Artemis’s eyes narrowed at the angry blonde. He wasn’t as thick-headed as she’d thought in the beginning. It seemed that he was not only an excellent fighter, but also very perceptive. A dangerous combination. 

“Big talk coming from you, Mr I’m-Better-Than-You,” Artemis purred, leaning forward and focusing her eyes on him like a predator on its prey. “You pretend to be hot shit every day, Katsuki Bakugou, but what can you do exactly? Be loud and do more damage than necessary? My guess is you're overcompensating because you know you ain’t shit.”

“Tch, as if. Don’t act like you know anything about me, you sorry excuse of a squirt gun,” he spat and turned away in his seat.

Something told Artemis that she had hit the target quite well.

The bus came to a halt, and the conversations of the class became louder as a big glass dome came into view. Aizawa rose from his seat.

“All right, class, quiet down. I’m not gonna say it again.” He crossed his arms. “The pro hero Thirteen is gonna wait for you inside. I am expecting you to be on your best behaviour. I will not tolerate any stupidity, or I will make you all train after class ‘till you drop. Is that clear?”

The students hummed in agreement and started to get off the bus.

Aizawa’s dark eyes fell on the newest addition to his class. What he’d overheard her say on the bus ride made him feel slightly uneasy. While she had made some sensible points, her apathy concerning teammates and the people around her was concerning. It was a dangerous, slippery path that could easily go in the wrong direction. He would have to have a conversation with her about that, but something told Aizawa he’d have to be smart about it. Artemis had so many walls up, she may as well have been a high security prison.

He wondered what kind of life this child had lived up to that point that could possibly have made her that way.

[deeeelightfuldee]

surveys 053.

do you sing in the shower? oh every single time. Its something I look forward to. 

do you think money makes people happy? As someone who currently relies on birthdays and holidays as her income, I can tell you it would relieve a bit of stress from me to even have like 100 bucks a month.

what's your relationship status? single.

what time is it? 12:25 am

what emotion are you feeling right now? I’m all over the place. Tonight Kile and I were messaging back n forth in a consistent manner which we haven’t done in a long time. Things were a bit romantic, which was extremely hard for me to deny participation in, and then it ended with me saying bye. boy it is hard to let go of him

do you have netflix? I do.

have you ever traveled outside your home country? no. Sadly, without a shot I will not be getting, I’m unsure of how I’ll be able to until the restrictions lessen.

coffee or tea? teeeeeeea pls.

shower or bath? Shower unless the bath is deep enough to cover my long self. 

what's your favorite pizza topping? depends on what kind of pizza. For instance, Jacks just GETS how to do supreme. some places nail the pepperoni, or fresh garlic or whatever. 

what's something that makes you happy? thinking about decorating my own place one day.

do you have siblings or are you an only child? I have 2 brothers and 1 sister

what's your favorite instrument? Piano, cello, drums

what's your favorite food? today it is fruity pebbles.

what is something you are always losing? I am pretty consistent on things going back to their original spot. I suppose if I’m losing something maybe it’d be like a scrunchie.

are you good at spelling? a good amount of the time.

what is one goal you have? all my goals are shifting.

did you get a flu shot this year? Nooo. never have. 

what's your favorite Disney movie? oh boy. i am not good with narrowing down those. are you bored? Not really, I’m just trying to keep my mind occupied until I’m sleepy.

what are you listening to? serendipity, bennys tail hitting my pillow, and my fans.

what's your favorite foreign language? I think it depends. are we talking for the way it sounds? or one that I’d want to learn?

what do you do when you can't sleep? this, read, find quotes, do puzzles, stare at the ceiling.

do you like cats or dogs better? this is one of my very least favorite questions to be asked. why would anyone want to choose between the two? both are so great.

do you have any piercings? Just my ears

what's your favorite vegetable? Potatoes

do you eat meat? Yeah.

what's your favorite season? any of them minus summer. Honestly, probably winter. 

do you still write letters? I love to, but I no longer have anyone to write to. 

what would make you really happy right now? i think a distraction that comes from having a crush.

what's your favorite song? ooo this changes but right now i’m into a lot of blue october.

are you good at giving advice? so, I’m the person you go to for advice if you want the moral, behaved, “you won’t regret this later” type advice. I’m great at giving that.

what's your favorite hobby? Right now, this.

do you prefer to talk or text? That is going to depend on the person. almost always text. But some people.. their voice is just intoxicating.

what's your favorite pair of shoes? I’m going to have to trash all my shoes for ones with heel support. 

how often do you read? (as in books) usually daily, but I’ve fallen out of that lately.

do you have any pets? I have 2 cats currently. I really want a golden retriever, but hey.

what's your favorite day of the week? they’re all similar at the moment, but probably saturdays

are you in college? I’m in the inbetween. Finished 2 bachelors, but am waiting for grad program

are you/have you ever been in a long distance relationship? I have been,

how do you typically listen to music? I use Spotify. either thru my headphones, my bluetooth speaker, the kitchen google, or my phone.

do you like going to the beach? I do so long as I have shade or the water is good to swim in.

did you make any new year's resolutions? I think pandemic NY resolutions were all about survival thru mentally exhausting times.

how old are you? 29 yrs young

do you know anyone who is blind? I do

who is someone you admire? My mom

do you have a good singing voice? when I was a kiddo, preteen, and teen yes. not any longer.

are your nails painted? Nope. I just wanted a break from keeping up with them.

Are you an extrovert or introvert? I’m an introvert but I can behave very well with the extroverts.

what are you having/had for dinner tonight? I had some tacos.

do you ever write in a journal? I would like to begin again, but this is a decent makeshift option

if you could time travel when/where would you go? I mean I’d love to go back to some great memories, but I worry that could be painful beyond repair.

what's your favorite animal? whales.

what's your favorite kind of cereal? honestly my cravings for cereal are for any kinds that I can no longer have. so dont ask.

how was your day? I’m only 44 minutes into it.

do you ever listen to classical music? I do. Clair de lune is one of the best 

what inspires you? learning. learning always inspires me.

how many pillows do you sleep with? I have like 20. OK huge exaggeration. I believe the true number of sleeping pillows is 4 large, 1 mini. 

how many hours of sleep do you need? I typically run off of about 3. I’ve had sleep studies done regarding that. But If I’m getting good oxygen and the temp is coooooooold I sleep so good.

do you have big or small feet? I have pretty average to slightly bigger. 

what's the weather like where you are? It’s been in the upper 80s.

what's the most interesting thing you can see out the window? just the reflection from my TV. it’s real dark out.

does/did your high school have a school song? no.

what month is your birthday in? July.

what's your dream job? the brain.

are you excited for summer? I’ve had a lovely summer, truly.

what foreign country would you want to live in for 6 months? switzerland.

did you have to go to school today? No, no I have not.

win a million $$ or never have to pay for anything again? Never have to pay for anything. Why would that even be a question. do you throw coins into fountains? when I was a kiddo

do you have a trampoline? Nope

what's your favorite song lyric? what if we could put our lives on hold and meet somewhere inside of the world, I would meet you... would you meet me? 

what did you eat the last time you went to the movies? Ill be honest IDK if we even got food.

do you ever measure time in songs? only if I’m in the shower. I’ll be like ahhh I’m 4 songs in.

do you know how to play chess? I’ve been taught MULTIPLE times. have I retained any of them? na.

what's your favorite game? (any type) right now I’m digging skipbo, trionomos, rummykub, and trouble.

do you enjoy traveling? I love it. so much.

do you tend to wait till the last minute? nope. I’m almost always 2 weeks prior

have you ever owned a goldfish? Yep!

how do you relieve stress? go on a drive. 

without looking it up, guess the outside temperature? I’d guess maybe 70. lemme see how close I am. 68!

now look it up - how close were you? woops. 68! two off.

do you prefer digital or analog clocks/watches? Digi. 

do you prefer to shop in stores or online? I almost always prefer online, but in store has its own perks like seeing the quality of things.

do you enjoy coloring? oh heck’n yea do you like to dance? I do!

have you ever owned a horse? my family did, yes

do you take selfies? oh i do. MUCH less now, than I did before. before I used to send kile like 10 a day. now I might take 2 per week.

do you ever listen to music in languages besides English? Not often, but on occasion

have you ever cried from listening to a song? absolutely.

do you prefer headphones or earbuds? so I appreciate how headphones are safer for the ears, but i typically wear earbuds.

can you speak Spanish? Very little. like a few words

what's the last thing you watched on youtube froggy freshhhhhhhhh dunked on now what time is it? 12:57. Im getting sleepy. --------- ok now it’s 859 am. I passed out last night.

do you ever watch musicals? sometimes. it’s not my favorite thing

do you know anyone who's a twin? Yeppp

do you ever get carsick? oh heck yeah, i do love the windows open

what's your opinion on wolves? I really never had an opinion. check back.

when you're sad do you prefer sad music or happy music? sad. indulge me

do you like seafood? Nooo. i wish

do you enjoy going to the zoo? no. i really dont. are there any celebrities from your hometown? uhhhh not that I know of

do you shower in the morning or at night? morning if I was great hair. If I want meh hair, night

do you prefer to work alone or in a group? Alone. ALWAYS.

do you go to the gym alone or with a friend? I don’t go to the gym. < problem solved.

do you like coconut? I like the scent but not the food. <<< SAME who is someone you're jealous of? JV for her abs

what's your favorite place to go out for breakfast? eggheadz

do you still have your christmas tree up? nah. its a tickle early (july)

do you have a favorite type of bird? cardinal.

have you ever had an overnight flight anywhere? yup. plenty of times.

if you use them, tell me 5 of your recently used emojis heart eyes, disappointed looking off to the side, sad face with eyes closed, hearts all over the face, and rolling eyes.

do you know anyone that plays the violin? yep. 

how much money is in your wallet right now? I would need to count

anything you're looking forward to tomorrow? having been done with packing lol

have you ever auditioned for anything? yeah I used to do auditions all the time for plays I was in.

did you have a webkinz when you were younger? No.

how would you describe your aesthetic? airy, comfy, inviting, warm

have you ever been told you look like a celebrity? yeah a couple times but its like not even a tiny bit close.

when was the last time you rode a bus? i have never.

if you saw $50 on the ground what would you do? is there a wallet attached?

do you know how to play any unusual instruments? yeah. don’t ask me. I’m not pleased about it.

are you an early bird or a night owl? kind of both. 

have you ever had trouble understanding someone because of an accent? oh yes. But the more time you spend talking to those individuals who have accents stronger than what you’re used to, become very easy to understand over time.

do you ever go to Massachusetts? I’ve never been but I’d love to go.

do you personally know anyone who is transgender? yeah a few people I’ve met through school. 

do you remember anything from when you were 5 or younger? yeah a few very small memories. 

do you need to do laundry? yes I desperately need to pack and I’m waiting on the laundry for that to happen. 

do you know anyone (including yourself) who actually enjoys math? NOT ME. not even close to me. Kile seemed to like it. 

do you have a favorite poem? the one written for meeeeee

if you were from somewhere else, would you visit your town on vacation? I don’t think i’d think of it, it’s not near anything specific.

where would you spend $100 if you had to spend it all in one store? amazon.

would you rather go to Japan or Greece? Greece.

now what song are you listening to? Gilmore girls, text notifications, fans

what are you wearing right now? shorts and a blue teeshirt. Bout to just be in a short shorts so I can tan. 

any fun plans for the weekend? travelingggggg.