#does he have any form of fandom on tumblr please say yes

[dreamingofep]

Sinned Awakening pt. 10🩸

An AU Elvis fic

(Vampire!Elvis/Vampire Austin!Elvis × reader)

Character/Fandom: Elvis - Elvis (2022)

Request: No

Prompt: Getting promoted to be Elvis full time housekeeper, you realize the man holds secrets beyond belief and your undeniable attraction makes you fear the unknown. [Fem!Reader]

TW: Cussing, tension, angst, spanking, oral, Smutt, blood/gore 🩸

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 7.7K

A/N: Hello everyone!

Welcome to part 10! I can't believe we've gotten this far! There's still so much we're learning about these two and it's only getting more complex by the day. A reminder, this is Vampire!Elvis so there is going to be mentions of blood/gore from here on out. If that's not your thing, sorry but it's needed for the story.

There's a lot going on this chapter that I've been wanting to include in a chapter at some point but haven't felt like its the right time. First off, when I first had the idea for this fic, I was curious when the first vampire myth came to be. It turns out it started out in Ancient Greece and a "vampire like being" was created by the gods. It fascinated me and I knew I needed to incorporate it into my story somehow.

Second, I have a soft spot for Elvis singing gospel. I know I needed to add a meaningful song to the chapter to show his vulnerability and You'll Never Walk Alone came to my head. When Elvis recorded this, it is actually him playing the piano in the recording. While this isn't technically a gospel song, it was written by Rodgers and Hammerstein for the musical Carousel but you can see how Elvis might have interpreted it as so. Take a listen if you want 🤭

I wanna say thanks to those of you for reading from the very beginning or, if you somehow stumbled across this one late night on Tumblr or Ao3 and decided to give it a shot. Your enthusiasm about this little story makes my heart sing so thank you!

If you’d like to start reading from the beginning, start here. 🩸

Thank you again! Please let me know what you think in the comments or send me a message!

Sorry for any spelling mistakes and overall goofs.🖤

You shake your head at him, watching him give you that sly smirk that you love so much, knowing that he has you in the palm of his hand. He leaves the bedroom with the door open and you follow him to see where he’s run off to so quickly. You grab the pajama top and put it back on you, buttoning the first few and following him into the next room. 

He’s standing by the small bar and opens a bottle of water. You walk to him leaning over the ledge as he hands you the glass. 

“Here honey,” he says smoothly. 

You take a sip, not realizing how much you need this. He comes around the bar to sit on the stool, drinking you in. He had his pajama bottoms on but left his chest exposed, giving you the best view imaginable. You look him up and down as he does to you and press your lips together, fighting the smirk forming on your face.

You step in between his legs, rubbing your hands up his chest gently, gliding around his neck, then up to his hair. He murmurs contently, but you pull at his hair harshly, making him grunt. 

You get close to his ear, “Take this out of me. Now.” You growl. 

“No. Not yet,” he says smugly, laughing softly. 

“What do you mean not yet?” you hiss. “I’m not having you play with me like this.”

He puts his hand around your neck, softly squeezing it, and makes you look at his dangerous eyes.

“Yes, you will. Trust me, you will listen to me,” he boasts.

“No, I won’t. You forget that I can resist your… charm,” you smirk at him, knowing that’s going to piss him off. He hates that you can’t be compelled by him and shoving it in his face is the icing on the cake. 

He squeezes his eyes closed in a frustrated manner and opens them back up facing you intensely. 

“You’re going to be the death of me hmm? Just never going to listen and constantly test me?” He grumbles rubbing his thumb lightly over the bruise on your neck. 

“Hmm… yes that sounds like a marvelous plan. Can’t let you get too comfortable,” you tease. 

“Using my own words against me, I don’t know what I’m going to do with you,” he quips, running his fingers through your hair. 

“I’m sure you’ll find a way,” you tease. “But first do something else with this,” you grunt, taking your finger and pulling the ring out of you, pushing it against his chest, your slick covering it. 

His eyes light up in shock and stares at you. You know you’re pushing it, he likes to be obeyed but something in you loves to get a rise out of him. It’s all dangerous though, his mood is so drastic especially when he’s hungry so you have to watch yourself. It’s been two days since he fed and you’re unaccustomed to how he acts when he does need to eat again. Can’t be worse than the first day you two met so you think you can handle anything. 

He doesn’t grab the ring right away, just looks at you like he could pin you down in one swoop and make you beg for his mercy. His eyes grow dark and his lips form a pompous look, waiting for your next dangerous move. You decide to grab his hand and slip the ring back on his ring finger. 

“There you go sweetheart,” you say mockingly, walking away towards the bathroom to wipe the slick in between your thighs. In the blink of an eye, he is in front of you again, towering over you, his breathing heavy. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” He seethes. 

“I’m not leaving if that’s what you’re thinking. You don’t have to break the doorknob again,” you taunt. 

His face drops and his eyes turn fiery. “You are unbelievable. Someone ought to put you in your place,” he rasps.

“I know honey. Put me on top of the piano again and show me how to behave,” you quip, rubbing your hand against his cock making him hiss in frustration. 

He quickly picks you up and puts you over his shoulder. You gasp and try to get out of his grasp but he’s far too strong compared to you. He takes long strides to the guest room and puts you down on the bed face down. You put your arms out quickly to brace yourself but he roughly grabs your wrists, putting them behind your back. You protest and continue to try to wiggle out of his hand that is grasping onto both of your wrists, keeping you still. You rest your forehead on the bed and let out a frustrated grunt. 

He pulls at your hair to turn your head to the side and leans down into the crook of your neck. 

“What did you think that kind of behavior was going to get you? You just like gettin’ me all riled up, is that it?” He hisses. You know you’re gonna get it, your little game has now turned into his and he loves to win. You feel him nip at your neck causing both of you to grunt. 

“Maybe a little,” you whimper. 

He doesn’t like that answer. Not one bit. 

He grunts and takes another nip at your neck. 

“I know I can’t make you listen to me, but I’m gonna have to teach you to listen to me,” he growls. Your eyebrows furrow in confusion but that’s when you feel it. 

His hand moves up to scrunch your pajamas out of the way and giving you a spank on your ass. You’re in shock and the stinging left behind on you makes you gasp. 

“Elvis don’t you dare!” You squeal out. 

“You’re gonna listen to me from now on won’t you,” he asks, giving you another spank. 

Your eyes water, not used to the feeling of anyone hitting your backside like this. He gives you another spank, letting out a breathy grunt. 

“Elvis!” You squeal. 

He pulls at your hair again, making your head lift from the bed. 

“Are you gonna listen? You gonna be good for me?” 

“Mhmm… most of the time,” you grumble, gasping for air. 

His hand comes down again but this time, a little moan comes out of your mouth instead and a new wave of pleasure begins to pour over you. You shouldn’t be surprised at this point that Elvis has unlocked another spark of pleasure you didn’t know existed before him. 

Now you want him to spank you, turning his little game into your pleasure.  

He murmurs contently,“Mhmm thats what I thought. You liking your punishment now honey?” He growled. 

“Your hands feel too good on me to be a punishment,” you gasp.

He gives you one last spank and you can’t help but moan louder. 

“Oh fuck, baby,” you groan. He squeezes your ass and places a kiss in the crook of your neck. He moans too and his fingers graze your folds, wet with arousal. 

“Jesus, such a naughty girl. I should put something in your mouth for saying such vulgar things.” He grumbles.

“Mhmm, I think that would be the appropriate punishment,” you tease.

He lets go of your wrists and turns you around to face him towering over you, your back laying on the bed, and your legs wrapped around his torso. He has a string grip on your thighs and has a big grin on his face when you look up at him. 

“You just can’t behave,” he growls, his thumb lightly pressing on your clit making you jump, still very sensitive. 

You shake your head no at him, batting your eyes at him. 

“Don’t be mad at me. I’ll be good. I’m sorry,” you whimper. His thumb continues to tease and you feel yourself get wetter. You watch his almost drunk eyes look at your weeping pussy and watch how he wants you to himself all over again. He pulls down the waist band of his pajamas and takes his cock out, hard once again. He really wasn’t lying that he never gets tired…

“Show me then. Show me how sorry you are,” he commands. His voice makes you quiver and you know what he’s asking for. You adjust your body on the bed and lay on you stomach, your forearms popping you up. You lick the tip of him softly, making him sigh with satisfaction.

“Please, forgive me baby,” you whisper before you wrap your lips around his head and suck, taking more of him in your mouth gradually. His hips buck into your mouth, wanting to fill you quickly with his length. You moan out, loving the way he’s so eager.

You know what he likes and know what will get him to come unglued the fastest. Your hand reaches for his balls, massaging them lightly. He bucks his hips into you again, causing you to gag around him.

“You fucking naughty girl,” he moans, placing his knee on the bed to move easier. You lick and suck more, groaning when how he puts more of his cock down your throat, making your eyes water.

“Sucha good girl. Relax your throat and let me fuck it some more,” he growls, taking a fist full of your hair in his hand and moves in and out of you. Your hand continues to touch his balls, getting him to let out all these animalistic grunts. 

You let him move, feeling how he won’t last that long with how you’re touching him and the way he’s moving inside you. You place your hand on his shaft that’s not in your mouth and jerk him off, licking and sucking his sensitive head.

He keeps groaning and cursing your name, getting so close.

“Baby, I’m gonna cum, right in that pretty mouth of yours,” he moans, moving his hips a few more times before he releases in your mouth. He fills your mouth quickly and makes you fall apart too with the sounds he’s making. You can’t help but gag around his length and moan with how he’s using you. It’s so dirty but you couldn’t care less. He was yours. All yours. 

He pulls his cock out of your mouth and watches you swallow everything he gave you. You smirks at you, pulling your body up to kiss you.

His lips devour yours and has his hands back on your body, consuming your bare flesh. You moan into his mouth loving how he feels on you. He slips his tongue into your mouth and deepens the kiss further. He feels like heaven as he touches all the parts that only he knows you like to be caressed.

He briefly pauses, giving you some air. 

“You’re good at apologizing,” he groans, going back to give you another kiss. 

You nod your head in agreement, “oh I’m glad you accepted the apology,” you quip. 

He smiles down at you, “So bad. You’re so bad. I like a good girl,” he teases. 

“Well, you’re going to have to deal with a bad girl then,” you say, your voice sultry. 

His hands squeeze your ass, pushing your body more into him. God, you’re a mess because of this man. He knows how to make you weak at all times and half the time he isn’t even trying. You’re addicted to his attention and his body and the way he makes you feel. It’s all never enough. You don’t know where this is going to end up but all you know is you need him at all times. Probably not the same level as him but in terms of being human, you didn’t want him to go away and leave you.

He smoothly pulls you onto him, having you lay your head on his chest. His skin melts into your warmth and makes you want to fall asleep on him. You feel so content here and you two wallow in the silence together. The longer you lay there, a chill runs through your body and his body temperature starts to make you shiver. He tries to hold you tighter but it isn’t helping. He grabs the blanket at the edge of the bed and covers your body.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers.

“It’s fine,” you says, wrapping the blanket tighter around you.

You adjust your head on his chest and your ear presses into where his heart is and for the first time, you hear his strange heartbeat. It’s so faint, barely obtainable by your ears and his slow breathing makes you realize how inhuman he really is. 

All of him is a facade that is made to please his victims. It’s so strange feeling and touching him knowing what you know now.

Thump…….silence……. 

Your hand trails up his stomach to his chest, placing your hand over his heart and look up at him surprised.

“I know,” he says, looking at you like he knows what you’re about to say. 

“Your heart… It’s so, quiet,” you whisper.

“Mhmm, it doesn’t work so well anymore,” he mumbles, kissing the top of your head, “Don’t worry about me.” 

“Is that how it always is? So… dormant,” you say softly.

“Yes. Ever since I’ve been bit. It’s also affected by how much I umm… eat,” he says carefully.

“I didn’t know. There’s just so much I’m finding out for the first time with you. You have to understand this stuff freaks me out a bit,” you explain.

He wraps his arms around you tighter, trying his best to comfort you.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry about all of this. You should have never found out. I should have never laid a hand on you, maybe then this all would be so much easier,” He says sorrowful.

“Honey, that’s not what I mean at all. I’m so happy with you. More than I have been in a very long time but it’s just this new bomb has dropped that you’re not really who I thought you are is going to take some time to get used to. I only found out two days ago that you’re…,” you say sheepishly when he cuts you off.

“I know baby, I know. I wish I could be different for you. Be exactly who you deserve but I can’t help it.” He says defeated, slowly lifting you up off his chest and getting off the bed, feeling the mood of the room drastically shift. 

You know he is this very powerful being that has abilities beyond your wildest dreams but as he looks down at you, sorrow filling his eyes, you see how fragile he really is. His stature is slouched, and his eyes look tired and gaunt. You want to comfort him, reach out and tell him everything is going to be alright but in reality, you don't know if that’s the truth.

“Baby, please come lay with me. I don’t want you to go. I didn’t mean to upset you,” you plead.

He looks at the clock on the wall and it reads midnight. “Maybe you should get some rest. You haven’t been sleeping well so I’ll leave you alone,” he says weakly.

You try to protest but he’s already out the door, softly closing it behind him.

You let out a frustrated grunt. You couldn’t sleep even if you tried. You hated seeing him hurt and wished you could make him forget all of his self-hatred.

You can only understand a fragment of how he felt about himself and how he felt when he looked in the mirror. He made this life-altering decision and now thirteen years later, does he regret it?

Does he regret it because you are now in his life?

Are you the reason he thinks differently about everything?

You don’t know but you also need to figure out what to do about this situation. There was one thing you knew for certain; you wanted him. You want him like no other person on this planet. You don’t think you wanted Daniel like this the you two were first seeing each other. These were two very different situations but they still affected you deeply.

That was another thing you had to figure out was how you were going to move out of that apartment and where you were going to live next. You didn’t want any confrontation with Daniel. There was no point in it and you made up your mind. Leaving was going to be the best option for both of you and maybe you could start the next chapter of your life freely.

You knew Anna wouldn’t mind letting you stay a little longer to figure your shit out. You were thankful for her and her kindness. Oh shit. 

You took her car when you thought you were going to just talk to Elvis. Now it's been days later and you haven’t even called her.

Shit she’s gonna kill me, you think.

Your chaotic thoughts swirl in your head and you panic. You see a phone on top of the dresser and quickly scramble out of the bed and reach for the phone. You start to dial her number and glance up at the clock and it is already half past two. She was definitely fast asleep but you needed to talk to her.

The phone rings a couple of times and the sound her her groggy voice fills the receiver.

“H-hello?”

“Hey Anna, it's me,” you whisper.

“Y/n? Are you okay? I’ve been so worried about you. What’s going on?” She asks.

You pause and take a deep breath. You know Elvis is probably listening with ease to your conversation so you know you need to choose your words carefully.

“I’m fine. I’m sorry I haven’t called… things have been… hectic,” you admit.

“Y/n I know when something is wrong. What’s going on?” She asks more firmly.

“I can’t really tell you specifics… but I’m sorry I took your car. Let me come by and pick you up for work so you can have it back,” you suggest.

“Okay, we’ll talk about this later, see you at 5:30. Just let yourself in with the key. I’m glad you’re okay though, I was worried sick.”

“I know, I’m sorry again, I’ll see you soon I promise,” you say before hanging up. 

You fall back onto the bed again, staring up at the ceiling, feeling crushed by guilt.

You try to take a nap but it feels too hot and too cold at the same time. An hour passes by and you’re restless. Elvis hasn’t made a sound in a few hours and you were curious what he was doing.

You put your pajama top on again and peeking out into the living room. You see piles of books scattered about on the tables and sofa. You decide to pick one up, curious about what he’s reading. You sit down on the sofa, scanning the mess of literature in front of you.

The thick, red, leather-bound book felt ancient, the pages were so thin, that you had to be extra careful touching them. You scan the pages seeing what this one is about. In the text, it explains, what a vampire is:

“The main characteristic of vampires is they drink human blood. They typically drain their victim’s blood using their sharp fangs, killing them slowly and turning them into vampires. Making the victim bite them in return to complete the process.”

A chill runs up your spine as you read these details of what these pages tell.

“Vampires are typically said to be of pale skin and range in appearance from grotesque to preternaturally beautiful…”

Yeah, that one is pretty obvious he’s supernaturally gorgeous.

You pick up the next book and thumb through the pages, reading the ancient lore of the first vampire showing up in Ancient Greece that was cursed by the Gods. This surprised you because you thought stories of the Greek Gods were just a fable, something that was made up. You don’t think you’ll ever be able to comprehend that stories are no longer myths and probably have more truth residing in them than you think.

You start to read the story of Ambrogio, a young adventurer born in Italy and one who longed to travel to Greece. When he was old enough, he set sail to Greece and traveled to the Eastern area of Delphi.

This was the home of Apollo’s temple, God of the Sun. When he was visiting, Ambrogio met an Oracle who would sit in a chamber within the temple and speak prophecies inspired by Apollo to those who came to seek the Oracle’s wisdom.

She only repeated: “The curse. The moon. The blood will run.”

It kept him up all night, worried about what the Oracle meant. He went for a walk and he saw a beautiful woman dressed in white walking to the temple. He stopped her and she told him her name was Selene and was the maiden of the temple. Her sister was the Oracle and would take care of her when she would be working. For the next few days, Ambrogio met Selene before she entered the temple and they fell madly in love.

On his last day in Greece, he asked Selene to marry him and return with him to Italy. She said yes and they agreed they would meet the next day at dawn outside the temple.

But this entire time, Apollo had been watching. He too loved Selene and grew enraged that Ambrogio would come to his temple and steal one of his maidens away. At sunset, Apollo appeared to Ambrogio and gave him a curse that from this day forward, the mere touch of Apollo’s sunlight would burn his skin.

He was terrified and had nowhere to go as the sun would burn him as soon as the sun rose. He hid in a cave that led to Hades. Hades, the God of the Underworld, listened to his cry for help and made him a deal. If Ambrogio could steal the silver bow of Artemis and bring it back, he would grant him and Selene protection in the underworld. As collateral, Ambrogio had to leave his soul behind with Hades until he returned with the bow. If he didn’t return with the bow, he would have to live in the Underworld forever, never seeing Selene again.

He took his bow and arrows and set out on his mission. He had no parchment to write to Selene what was going on, so he shot a swan, using its blood for ink and taking a single feather to write a poem to her. He did this for forty-four days, never missing a single day.

On the forty-fifth night, he had one arrow left and shot at a swan and missed. He felt hopeless and cried for help. Artemis, sister of Apollo and the Goddess of Hunting and the Moon, heard his cry. He begged her for one arrow to write Selene a note and she took pity on him. She let him borrow one silver arrow and he quickly ran to Hade’s cave to deliver the object to him. Artemis realized what was happening and cast her own curse on him; for silver to burn his skin.

Ambrogio begged for her forgiveness and explained the curse Apollo gave him and his undying love for Selene that he didn’t have any choice but to do what he had done. She pitied him and decided to give him one last chance. She offered to make him a great hunter, almost as great as she was, with the speed and strength of a god and fangs with which to drain the blood of the beasts to write his poems. In exchange for this immortality, he would have to agree to a deal. He and Selene would have to escape Apollo's temple and worship only Artemis forever. The catch was that Artemis was a virgin goddess, and all of her followers had to remain chaste and unmarried, so Ambrogio was never allowed to touch Selene again. They could never kiss, never touch, never have children. He quickly agreed and left a note to Selene at the temple to meet him at the docks and ran away before Apollo would notice he was there.

She met him at the ship and she found him hiding in a coffin, sheltering from the sunlight. They sailed to Ephesus where they would live many long and happy years together. They stayed faithful to Artemis and never touched or kissed. While he stayed the same after all those years, Selene grew old and ill and was on her deathbed. He couldn’t bear to see her die and knew he would not be with her in the afterlife since his soul still resided with Hades. He ran to the woods and found a white swan and shot it, offering it to Artemis, begging to make Selene immortal like him.

Artemis thanked Ambrogio for all their dedication to her after all these years and would make him one last deal. He could touch Selene just once - to drink her blood. Doing so would kill her mortal body, but from then on, her blood mixed with his could create eternal life for any who drank of it. If he did this, Artemis would see to it that they stayed together forever. Ambrogio was terrified and didn’t want to do it, but when he explained this to Selene, she begged him to bite her. He had no choice but to bite her and took her blood into his body as he watched her body be lifted up to the sky where she met Artemis on the moon. She beamed with brilliant light where Artemis granted her to become the Goddess of the Moonlight, where her rays of light would shine upon everyone and her beloved Ambrogio.

This story left you in shock, the story of the first vampires on this earth were made by the gods? So much information flooded your head and you needed to borrow some of these books from Elvis. In a way, you thought it was beautiful, the way he made her immortal out of his undying love for her even though he thought he was cursed for all eternity. They got to spend forever together. You wonder how they turned other people into, what would later be known as, vampires.

You easily could sit here the rest of the night sifting through all these books but you should see where Elvis ran off to. You call out for him but hear nothing in the suite. You check his bedroom and it is untouched and quiet. You decide to see if his men outside know where he ran off to. You grab the blanket from the bedroom to wrap around you since you don’t have any pants on and don’t need any wandering eyes on you. 

Opening the door, a man is standing outside of it as usual.

“Hey, where’d Elvis go?” You ask.

“Downstairs, in the ballroom,” he says without turning around.

“Can you get out of the way so I can get through the doorway?” You say ticked off, pushing past him to get out of the suite.

His frame is stiff and rigid just like Elvis’ and you can feel his cold temperature brush off you.

You stare up at him in bewilderment.

“Oh my God, he turned you? Didn’t he?” You say in shock.

He takes a moment to pause and remove his sunglasses. His eyes were dark, almost black, just like how Elvis’ got.

“Yes. Do you always ask so many questions?” He grumbles.

“Fuck you. What floor is he on?” You snap.

He takes a deep breath before answering, “First floor. Make a right out of the elevator to the door that says Ballroom 1.” He says annoyed.

You push past the rest of the men that you now know are vampires and get into the elevator. How many other people has he turned? Did they have any say over the matter? Or was he so thirsty he couldn’t control himself…

You pinch yourself, stopping from creating these awful scenarios in your head.

You get off the elevator and get out, going down the hallway til you reach the ballroom doors. Quietly turning the knob, you look into the room. It was filled with chairs and musical instruments and you hear the soft playing of a piano. You step inside fully and close the door, finding Elvis with his back turned toward you, dressed in his robe, black pajama bottoms, and wearing his slippers.

When you walk through a storm

Hold your head up high

And don't be afraid of the dark…

His voice rings out flawlessly, it makes you have chills as you have never heard him sing live before. Something about his voice in person is better than any recording could ever capture. You watch his long fingers dance over the ivory keys, pressing delicately and letting the beautiful music fill the room. 

At the end of a storm

There's a golden sky

And the sweet silver song of a lark

You make your way further into the room. He never fails to keep you in awe of him. Even though he saw himself as a monster, you saw him like a Greek God. Perfect in every way. From his chiseled jawline to his perfect nose, there wasn’t a flaw you saw on him. Every inch of him was perfect and you wanted to make him see that. “Cursed,” or not, you were entirely enthralled by Elvis Presley.

You stand behind him, your hands trail down along his chest making him breathe deeply and he leans back into you.

He inhales your scent and grumbles, taking another breath before singing the next line. 

Walk on through the wind

Walk on through the rain

For your dreams be tossed and blown

… Walk on, walk on

With hope in your heart

And you'll never walk alone

He plays the last few notes and leaves them ringing out on the grand piano. He sits there still, not making a sound.

“That was beautiful honey. You sing it so soulfully,” you whisper, kissing his neck.

He lets out a low growl, “You should have stayed upstairs.”

“Hiding from me isn’t going to solve your problems. Talk to me,” you plead.

“I just wanted to play without disturbing you. You need your rest,” he says.

“I can’t rest when I know you’re upset. The song was beautiful. You sing with so much love in your voice,” you praise.

You see his face crack a smile when he hears this from you.

“Thanks… Gospel music makes me the happiest. It’s what I first fell in love with. Sometimes I sit here and play for hours, trying to get God to listen to me,” he says weakly.

He turns to look at you, tears filling his eyes, “Do you think God can forgive me? For what I’ve done? For who I am?” He looks so fragile, wanting love and acceptance from God. From you. He still had so many human qualities even if he didn’t see them. He was insecure just like the rest of us. Wanting love and acceptance no matter what we do in life. 

But he wanted to hear acceptance from you in particular.

You had heard he was very religious, but now that he was… well, no longer human, you didn’t know how he felt about religion.

“Oh, honey… I don’t know much about religion… I frankly don’t know much about anything in this world anymore, but from what I’ve gathered, He’s a forgiving God. I think He can forgive you too.” You assure. 

He adjusts his legs on the piano bench, turning his body and putting each leg on the side of the bench to look at you. He looks into your eyes expectantly, “I don’t think so baby… I’m not good. I’ll just always be this,” he says exasperated looking down to the floor.

You take his face in your hands and make him look at you.

“You’re a lot better than most men. Trust me on this. I know you’re trying your best to be better. I see it,” you press. “

He shakes his head at you, taking your hands off of him, and squeezing them lightly.

“Honey, please, I can’t have you touch me right now. I don’t trust myself,” he grunts.

Your heart aches for him, frustrated he sees himself so evil.

“Baby, please. I trust you, I know you won’t hurt me.” You assure him, putting your hands back on his face. He lets out a content sigh feeling your skin on his.

“Honey, listen to me. I- I- shouldn’t. You need to know something. Before anytime I’m around you, or make love to you, I need to drink blood. Just so I can have some sense of control around you. I don’t want to hurt you,” he says weakly.

This made a lot of sense actually, how he would sneak off into his bathroom, his eyes becoming brighter and less clouded before he’d have you. 

“You’re okay. I trust you. I need to be with you,” you beg.

You place a kiss on his forehead, taking in his scent. He continues to look down, looking more defeated than you’ve ever seen him. You hate seeing him like this. He’s not listening to you and you need to make him. A bold rush comes over you and your hands trail down his chest to his torso where his robe is tied. You pull at the bow and watch his robe come apart, exposing his chest with the long gold chains hanging down on it.

His blue eyes meet yours and he looks at you cautiously.

“Honey, please,” he sighs.

You won’t listen to any of his protests, you’re so focused on him, determined to get him to forget all of his self-doubts and have him let you love him. You bring his hands to your hips, making him squeeze you gently.

“Touch me,” you whimper. He sighs frustratedly, looking up at your pleading eyes.

You drop the blanket and slowly unbutton your pajamas, flinging it to the side, watching his eyes get distracted by your breasts in his face. You straddle his hips and sit down, kissing his cheek, and wrapping your arms around his neck. His hands travel down to your ass and push you into his frame firmly. He grunts getting to feel your body like this and the response you give back to him.

You can feel his cock growing harder the more you tease and kiss his face. You nip at his neck, just as he does to you and he growls. “Goddamn it. You’re killing me,” he grunts.

You keep teasing him, softly rocking your hips into him, loving it as much as he does.

You pull at his hair to get him to meet your eager lips and kiss him passionately. He moans into your mouth and puts his hands in your hair. You pull away to get some air and his attentive mouth is licking and sucking on your breasts. Your eyes shut and your jaw slacks open as he sucks on your nipple, sending shock waves of pleasure through you. Your hips continue to grind on him and feel his length rubbing your core. This friction felt so good on you and you let out the moans you don’t want to hold back. This extreme amount of need flows through you and you don’t want to wait any longer. You can feel the arousal seep out of you and need him to feel what he’s doing to you.

“Let me fuck you,” you whisper in his ear, reaching underneath his robe and scratching down his back. He cusses under his breath and grumbles.

“Baby, I can’t… I can’t hurt you,” he professes.

“You’re not. I know you won’t. I want you to make me feel good,” you say with a roll of your hips. You reach for his hand and guide him to your wet folds. He groans when his fingers make that discovery and instinctively rubs his fingers on your clit, then teasing your entrance lightly.

“I need you,” you plead. 

He grunts heavily and sucks on your neck moaning your name, making your core throb. The way he moans your name should be illegal with how unglued you become and makes you feel like you’re on fire. “Please,” you continue to beg, “you know how long it’s been since you’ve fucked me?” You say in a moaning breath.

He groans, pushing your upper body away from his at an angle with his hand on your lower back, pressing his face into your breasts and nipping and sucking on them. This makes you moan and squirm too, loving the response you can get out of him.

“Yes, I do,” he pants,“ Five days. Five days since I’ve been able to stuff that tight little pussy and make you scream my name,” he grunts, making your core grind into him. You groan and feel your heartbeat start to race in your chest, his words making your core throb immensely. 

You stand up, hooking your fingers into his pajama bottoms, and slide them off. His cock springs free and you straddle him once more, taking him in your hand, rubbing him firmly.

“Do you want to do that, honey?” You whimper, weak already from this notion.

“Please, fuck me, baby,” he grunts, lifting you up and lining himself up to your entrance.

You love how needy you’ve made him and want to make him a puddle just as he makes you.

You sink down on his length, taking all of him quickly and you groan when you feel him stretching you, filling you so completely. 

“Holy shit. Oh, fuck baby,” you pant, your fingernails embedding into his shoulders. You move faster than you normally would, wanting to fuck him like you have never before.

His hands hold onto your hips tight, bringing you down on him hard and fast.

Both of your grunts fill the room and he feels too good, making you come apart faster than usual. You squeeze and claw at his biceps and moan out his name. He holds your hips still as you adjust to him. Rocking your hips back and forth, you feel how insanely good he’s filling you never wanting this to end.

He pushes his hips deep inside you, making you cry out in shock.

“Oh fuck yes baby, just like that,” he groans.

He places his hand on your lower stomach and pushes there. He’s added this new pressure inside you and you look at him in shock, having never felt like this. Your hips grind into the base of his cock, making you want to come.

��Oh God honey, y-you’re so deep inside me you’re killing me,” you gasp.

“Mhmm, keep moving,” he growls.

Your eyes roll back and you squeeze your eyes shut, letting all your instincts take over and fuck this perfect man underneath you. You can feel your walls begin to flutter the more you bounce on him, cussing his name like he’s your savior. You feel his hand wrap around your neck, making you pop your eyes back open.

“Look at me. Look at me when you’re fucking me,” he groans through his teeth, possessiveness rolling off of him like a tidal wave. You lock onto his eyes as his hips buck into you, taking you harder and faster. You can’t take much more of this, you feel the coil in your belly about to snap and the pressure added by his hand on your stomach makes you feel like you’re going to combust. You scream out his name, having to shut your eyes, getting too overwhelmed with each thrust.

His hands slide to your breasts, squeezing them firmly, his intensity blazing off of him. 

The sounds you two are making shouldn’t be allowed and being quiet isn’t an option for you. 

His hand grabs your jaw, making your eyes open again. 

“I said, look at me. I want to watch you come apart,” he groans, putting his hands back on your hips, helping you thrust on his length. 

He keeps you locked onto him, biting his lip as he watches your face marvel into pleasure. You can’t hold on for much longer, you can feel your body begin to fall apart with every loud heartbeat ringing in your ears.

“I’m- oh fuck baby,” you beg him, your eyes doing all the talking.

He growls in your ear and pants heavily, “cum for me, now,” he demands, possessiveness overflowing from him.

You hold onto him for dear life as your whole body tenses and the heat of the orgasm washes over you over and over again. You see stars behind your eyelids and gasp for air. You moan out his name as your walls squeeze his cock deep inside you. Your nails leave red marks down his back and he only fucks you harder. He lets out a deep, primal growl as he fucks you through your orgasm.

“Mhmm yes, you’re all mine baby, all mine,” he moans, loving the feeling of you squeezing him.

His face burrows into the crook of your neck, groaning loudly and heaving for air. You continue to ride out your orgasm and your vision becomes clear again. The grip his hands have on you is so firm, you’re afraid he’s going to leave huge bruises behind. You heard him inhale deeply into your neck and moan your name. He keeps you moving on his length even though you feel spent.

He suddenly places a hand on the back of your head and makes an animalistic groan. You feel his teeth on your neck and nips at your neck like always. Your heart races out of your chest as this all feels so overwhelming. You gasp with his mouth on your neck and push into him more, more moans escaping you. Then, it feels different. He was nipping harder than usual and it started to sting.

You start to panic and the sounds emitted in his throat begin to become louder.

A sharp pain spreads across your neck and you push his head away from your neck and cover your neck as a reflex from the pain.

“Ouch!” you yelp.

Your eyes widen in shock as you see a small amount of blood dribbled down on his bottom lip. You remove your hand from your neck and look down at your to see the blood on your fingertips. You can’t move, you’re too scared from how he’s looking at you and by the way he has this far dazed look in his eyes. He licks his bottom lip and tastes your blood, making this eyes roll back.

He then quickly lifts you off of him and he stands up, towering over your scared body. You watch how he heaves for air and how his fangs grow and sharpen. 

“Oh God,” you gasp.

Terror washes over you as you try to back away from Elvis, needing to give him space. You reach for the blanket on the floor and wrap yourself in it again. You keep pressure on your neck to stop it from bleeding but your racing heartbeat only makes it worse. He lets out these frustrated grunts, squeezing his eyes shut like he’s in pain.

He opens them again to look at you and they’re blood red, black veins spreading from under his eyes. You can’t speak, you’re too in shock from all that has happened. Elvis groans in pain, panting heavily and backing away from you.

“Leave. NOW!” He bellows making the hair on the back of your neck stand up.

 Nerves fill your body and you feel like you could pass out any second. You’ve never needed to get out of a room quicker than now with a starving vampire staring you down. You think this might be even worse than the first day with him. His eyes look so dangerous, so cunning, he has lost complete control of himself and won’t calm down til he gets his fill.

You start to stumble backward but your feet aren’t catching up with your brain. You can’t get out of here any faster. He presses his hands to his ears, groaning in agony.

“Fuck, get away from me! I can’t control myself. RUN!,” he yowls. He quickly turns away from you and you watch in horror how his fists fly up in the air, then come back down on the piano, splitting it in two.

The tumultuous sound it creates makes your skin crawl and your ears hurt. You turn to run to the door and all you hear is his painful, agonizing groans as he continues to bash at the piano.

You slam the door closed and make a run to the stairwell. You don’t care if anyone sees you running through the hotel in just a blanket, you need to get out of there fast.

You grab the keys to the car you left in the locker room and make a sprint for it to Anna’a apartment. Your heart hasn’t slowed down one bit from leaving the hotel. You drive recklessly on the side streets and hope to God you don’t get pulled over. You check your rearview mirror every five seconds, praying no one is following you. Elvis in particular.

You finally make it to the apartment, quickly park the car, and run upstairs. You can’t catch your breath and feel the entire room spin as you close the door behind you and quickly lock it. Your neck throbs at the bite mark and you place your hand back on it, checking to see if you’re still bleeding. Your blood paints your fingers and you whine in pain. Your flesh was already so sensitive there from the bruise that resided on it, but now the open wound stung and you needed to stop the bleeding.

The hall light comes on and you see Anna turn the corner, sleepy-eyed and squinting to try to adjust her eyes to the light.

“Y/n? Are you okay?” She says panicked, watching you stand there bloody wrapped in a blanket.

You gasp for air and feel the room closing in, “I- I- please help-,” you whimper before your knees give out and your world turns black in an instant.

*

*

*

Tagging:

@powerofelvis @burninlovebutler @neptuneismysister @velvetelvis @ccab @presleyenterprise @elvispresleyxo @loving-elvis

@prompted-wordsmith @sillybookmarks @dkayfixates @rosepresley @ellie-24 @rktismylife-blog @myradiaz @tacozebra051 @thatbanditqueen

@18lkpeters @flwrs4aust @emma181873 @austinswhitewolf @eliseinmemphis @everythingelvispresley @chasingwildflowers @idontwanttoputanything @ohjustpeachy @elvisalltheway101 @austinsmutler @kingdomforapony @generoustreemystic @kendralavon7 @lettersfromvenus @claire-elvisgirl

@ashtag6887 @burnthheparaphilia @richardslady121 @jaqueline19997

@returntopresley @iloveelvis @rjmartin11 @that-hotdog @louisejoy86 @misspresley @cattcb @annapresley8 @arrolyn1114 @raginginkedslut

[supercalime]

I can’t believe I found people who think about this the exact same way as I do. I don’t get these hardcore buddie stans who suddenly try to make it look like buckTommy shipper are the toxic ones. I haven’t seen a single BuckTommy shipper who was rude without a reason (maybe a bit defensive about their CANON ship). Whereas I’ve seen plenty of incredibly toxic buddie stans who insult everyone who doesn’t ship their ship or share their opinions.

Another thing and don’t get me wrong Im not defending anyone. But I’ve seen many people heavily bullying the marisol actress because she’s apparently homophobic (not saying she isn’t or is) and wanting her to be gone beacause of this reason but totally ignore the alleged racism of ryan (again not saying he is racist or not, i dont know them personally) just because he is part of their beloved ship. By their logic Ryan should leave the show too.

Hey anon, it took me some time to answer your ask (chaotic life stuff lol) but I’m glad to finally have time to talk about this first part with you.

I’ll preface by saying I won’t get involved in actor drama, no matter how true or toxic it is because I don’t have enough information nor am I qualified to talk about the issues they mishandled. I’ll just say that, no matter who does bad things, they should be held accountable.

Okay, back to the main point: yes, it’s very strange how b*ddie st*ns are behaving towards the canon bi!buck thing. Both with people who ship bucktommy but also with the creators and actors on the show. Regardless if they are right or not about b*ddie being canon, this is not how you act with entertainment, specially with the people giving the content.

I hate to bash but it looks and sounds a lot like a toddler throwing a tantrum because they didn’t get a specific toy.

And toddlers only throw tantrums because they are brand new humans who are learning how to behave. They don’t know any better so they react with outbursts and repeated demands because it’s the only way they know to get the attention of the person taking care of them.

If I’m not mistaken, the main audience for the show is 18-45. NO ONE here should be yelling in comment sections “we want buddie! we want buddie! we want buddie!” as if they would immediately get it. It’s not how it works and it’s frankly embarrassing to see a bunch of adults acting like that for everyone to see.

And I can’t stress it enough, I’m not putting myself on a high ground here and saying I’m a better person by shipping bucktommy, as I’m sure there might be a percentage of fans out there being rude and annoying as well. But at least I’m keeping my conscience clear by not acting like me shipping two characters is something big enough in my life to ruin my enjoyment of a whole show in case my favorite ship doesn’t become canon.

I hate how fandoms behave as if they can have control over the content they are consuming. We aren’t entitled to anything and if there is supposed to be ANY discourse about which character was supposed to end with, that should happen AFTER the show ended! The story isn’t over yet! So why are b*ddie st*ns so stressed? If a show is making you this angry and demanding, please step aside a little, give it some distance because that’s not how consuming content is supposed to make you feel.

And I say that last part with sincerity because I too got way too involved with fandom discourse in the past, to the point that I had to distance myself from certain shows because being that involved made me upset.

Im just tired at this point you know. Im trying to protect myself as much as possible. Im not in the bird app, I don’t follow the show or the actors on social media, im avoiding interviews like the plague. All I want from this experience is to watch the show, gather my thoughts, form my opinions, log onto tumblr and reblog the cute stuff I see about my favorite ship without having to worry about whatever the hell is going on outside my pretty little bubble

[foamy-germs]

Intro + Masterlist 💞

Preferably do read through all of this! I’d appreciate it!

- ⭐️ -

Intro (Masterlist under the cut)

Heyo! I’m Alex, I joined tumblr a good while ago, but never really had the courage to post much. Until now!

My pronouns are He/Him, and my account is absolutely a safe space for LGBTQ+ folks!

For safety, I won’t share my age. Regardless, I’ll block any weird dms.

On the topic of DMs, any messages or asks simply saying “hi” might not be answered 😭 they make me anxious.

- ⭐️ -

Masterlist

I’ll currently only do SFW requests. Suggestive ones are okay, but I won’t do straight up smut at this time.

Requests: Open! (Currently very inactive as of May 2024, however working to get back into it now that I've graduated.)

Spiderverse trilogy

Peter B. Parker

Miguel O’Hara

Spider Noir

The Spot/Johnathon Ohnn (Pre- and post-collider)

Web Slinger

Hobie Brown (Strictly non-sexual)

Mob Psycho 100

Reigen Arataka

Serizawa Katsuya

Mr. Osomatsu (No ships)

Osomatsu

Karamatsu

Choromatsu

Ichimatsu

Jyushimatsu

Todomatsu

Totoko

Team Fortress 2 (No ships)

Spy

Scout

Heavy

Medic

Engineer

Demoman

Pyro

Sniper

Soldier

Call of Duty

Task Force 141 (MW2 2009 & 2019)

Lupin III franchise

Arséne Lupin III

Daisuke Jigen

Goemon Ishikawa

Fujiko Mine

Inspector Zenigata

Hunter x Hunter

Leorio

Kurapika

Illumi

Wing

Chrollo

Feitan

Shalnark

My Hero Academia

Shouta Aizawa/Eraserhead

Hizashi Yamada/Present Mic

Toshinori Yagi/All Might (both forms)

Taishiro Toyomitsu/FatGum

Keigo Takami/Hawks

Nemuri Kayama/Midnight

Jin Bubaigawara/Twice

Dabi

Tomura Shigaraki (please specify which season/version)

Spooky Month

Bob Velseb

Frank

Lila

Jaune

Aaron

Skiddad / Simon

Rick

Carmen

Streber

Kevin

Villainous

Dr. Flug

Cecelia/Miss Heed

Can do:

Fluff

Scenarios/Imagines

Oneshots

Ships

x reader

Headcanons

[some] Angst

Suggestive requests (this does have a limit! and I will reject requests I’m uncomfortable with.)

Can’t/Will NOT do:

Smut

Proship

Anything political

(I will add to this as time passes.)

Disclaimers:

If I find a request uncomfortable to fulfill, I will reject it.

If some things have certain disclaimers (such as TF2 with ‘no ships’), it is because I’m not comfortable exploring writing with that specific topic for the fandom.

For characters, like Hobie, I may refuse various topics for them for various reasons. For Hobie specifically, his age is unconfirmed and constantly debated.

Do keep in mind that I’m a student with a job and family, and some requests may take a while. I tend to revise my stories multiple times over 😭.

Update on this section: I've graduated! Currently job searching like crazy and also prepping for college, however tryna get back into the swing of things now that I have some free time.

Of course, if something isn't listed here, feel free to ask! There's a multitude of fandoms I find myself interested in.

However, feel free to ask if I can write something! I’ll almost always say yes.

[rebelrebelwrites]

Fic Friday! ❤️ Rebel’s Weekly Fic Recs

As always, this week's recs are...

As always, please mind the tags on any recommended story for your own personal preferences.

+++

The Classic You’ve Heard Of But Somehow Haven’t Read Yet: i cannot heave my heart into my mouth by @fallofrainblog

What you need to know going in:

It’s a Sauron POV fic! Also something I read early on in my fandom days, back when I was still lurking and delaying the inevitable development of a true hyper-fixation. 😆 This one-shot follows Sauron throughout RoP S1 as he encounters Galadriel, steadily following more in love with her despite his stubborn desire not to do so — at first. Spoiler alert: he falls fast. What I love about this fic is how intentional it feels; it breathes, if that makes sense, as Sauron, by his own estimation, is drawn to Galadriel and her light, "betrayed" by his human body and heart for wanting her as badly as he does; wanting to bask in her light and strength of will. And, don’t get me wrong — she wants him back, at least while she still knows him as Halbrand — but the intensity of his feelings, however mercurial, bursts onto the page and draws you in, too. The moments of tenderness, the blaze of lust and burgeoning love, then the angst, betrayal and desperate longing… it really runs the gamut of great. This fic may traverse familiar territory in the way of post-S1 plot, but every moment feels… dare I say? Precious.

Complete, Mature

Read the story.

Follow the author on Tumblr and AO3.

+++

The AU You Need to Immerse Yourself In Because, Well, Wow: The Venus of Valinor by @thecoziestbean

What you need to know going in:

When I saw this fic pop up (I think on Tumblr? I can’t recall) and read the summary, it was an immediate read + subscribe. This modern AU features Galadriel as art world royalty trying to protect a family secret — that many of the works in her family’s storied collection are straight-up fakes. (A shitty Feanor strikes again, friends.) How? By enlisting the help of the wily, way-too-sexy art thief Halbrand. A riff on the 60’s film How to Steal a Million (which I admittedly have not seen), this fic is in early days but already endlessly entertaining — and, not to mention, sexy. Get ready for deliciously flirty banter, a determined but slightly desperate Galadriel, and as always, a definitely morally dubious Halbrand. Where we go from here, I don’t know, but I’m very intrigued to find out.

WIP, Explicit

Read the story.

Follow the author on Tumblr, Twitter, and AO3.

+++

The Complete But Never Forgotten Masterpiece: It Will Come Back by @nocaptainonthisship

What you need to know going in:

Oh man, this fic. It broke me a little, but in the best way. It’s a modern AU that can also be described as a coffee shop AU, but that doesn’t encompass all this fic is and does. The premise is simple: Galadriel falls for her coworker/neighbor, Halbrand, and they begin a casual, toxic relationship that feels so achingly well-realized the angst and hurt will have a knot forming in your chest. The relationship bends and breaks in so many ways over the course of years, and delves into some dark places (so as always, mind the tags) but in an effort to not spoil anything, I’ll just say that it comes with an explosive, blisteringly satisfying ending that will haunt me. Immediate bookmark? Hell. Yes.

Complete, Explicit

Read the story.

Follow the author on Tumblr and AO3.

+++

The WIP That Will Wreck You (In the Best Way): i'm a sinking ship that's burning, so let go of my hand by @orcas86

What you need to know going in:

Can you tell I’ve been delving into more and more AUs lately (and loving it)? 🤣 Another gnawingly good entry from @orcas86, this modern AU sees Galadriel as a principal ballerina, subject to the meticulous and often mean eye (I’m so sorry, had to do it) of Halbrand, her company’s creative director. The two bite back and forth at each other in this twisted, intoxicating way, all while Galadriel is spiraling all on her own to feel something in the stifling world she’s stuck in (of her own making). This fic delivers on all the drama, jealousy, possessiveness and angst you could ask for — plus, scorching smut as always. 🔥

WIP, Explicit

Read the story.

Follow the author on Tumblr, Twitter, and AO3.

+++

The Can't Stop Consuming No Matter What Time It Is Fic: cause i'm mistaking honey for the bees by @alicuntisms

What you need to know going in:

Aaaand another modern AU that’s got me in a dirty, dark chokehold (which is why it’s impossible to not inhale upon reading, but again, mind those tags). This fic has Galadriel and Halbrand in college; her younger and admittedly more vulnerable, and him, a graduate student who becomes enraptured and unhealthily obsessed with her at a frat party and in the resulting aftermath — to the point that she gets caught in the maelstrom of his feelings for her: possessive, heady, and definitely boasting a mean, unpredictable edge. The toying with each other; the fickle, ceaseless push and pull between the two of them is seriously edge-of-your-seat, 👀👀👀 reading. And, again, the smut? Sinfully hot. 👌👌👌

WIP, Explicit

Read the story.

Follow the author on Tumblr and AO3.

+++

🤩🤩🤩

Me at all these fics:

Don’t see your story on this list yet? Keyword: yet. Please don’t fret! I can only recommend so many each week, but I am always looking for more stuff to read, share, and generally shower with love, so please feel free to reply with your own fics or your personal faves. I have plenty more to recommend… ❤️

Until next week!

[nuttytani]

Celestia's Cruel Thesis

Fandom: Genshin Impact

Pairing: Tartaglia | Childe x Zhongli

Premise: Childe gets isekai'd to a Liyue where Rex Lapis still rules over it.

A/N: I'm cross posting my works from ao3 to tumblr. Also, please check out this beautiful parallel world zhongchi art by @karininogo. This particular art lived rent free in my mind until it compelled me to write a fic about it + this is a multi chapter fic.

Fic is also available on my ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51194101/chapters/129353446

Chapter 1: Door to a new world

“Be careful, young man. I advise you not to accept any form of apparatus that measures time… Ah yes, particularly by someone in white. It will soon be the time for lantern rite after all, best avoid all bad omens at this time of the year,” the old man said weakly.

“That’s one strange superstition! But thanks, Luo Xiansheng, I’ll keep that in mind but I'm pretty sure that I won’t be receiving anything today,” Childe replied, chuckling to himself. The people of Liyue may have been freed from the rule of Adepti, however, their superstitions still remain. 

Oh, if only Childe could turn back time and slap himself, how wrong he was to ignore the wise words of the old man.

.

“Pay your respects! Yanwang Dijun has arrived, bow down to his imperial majesty!”

“Thousands of blessings to our lord!” the crowd yelled in excitement.  

“May you always protect our lands, oh almighty!” 

Sheesh, these people sure love their Archon huh? Childe watched warily, as he stood amongst the sea of Liyuens. He pulled at his white hooded robe closer, it was of Sumerian make, not that it mattered but the cotton was of good quality. Hopefully, his unassuming getup would help keep any suspicious eyes at bay…

When Luo Xiansheng had warned him about receiving gifts related to time and particularly by someone in white– he had not expected Paimon and the Traveller to drop by his office in Northland bank. And he definitely did not foresee them giving him an old hourglass. According to them, they found it in some mysterious domain in Mt. Hulao. 

He really shouldn’t have fiddled with that hourglass, at least not before getting it checked for traps and such. Well, most of the time, he would have done just that except, for some reason, he does– well did trust the Traveller. Though he is sure that it wasn’t her fault, neither did she know the consequences of using the hourglass. 

Ah, Lumine really needs to learn not to get her hands on every random thing she finds in obviously dangerous domains. 

.

Hmph, wretched fate he has. First it was the abyss and now he’s in some strange world where Zhongli– no, Rex Lapis, Morax, still rules over Liyue alongside the Adepti. Great, absolutely lovely! 

But, on a positive note, he isn’t even sure if it’s positive or at this point just… coping. He found out that the majority, if not all, of the people in the harbour were the same from his “world”. Like Iron tongue Tian telling his stories like always, Shitou selling his mine ores, that girl who always feeds the goldfish and Chef Mao, cooking as always alongside Xiangling. But none, not a single one of them recognise him. There is no such person as Tartaglia, Childe in this world. That he is sure of. He also figured that people don’t refer to the Archon as Rex Lapis, but as Yanwang Dijun. 

This Liyue may be similar in certain aspects but still has its differences from the one he’s used to.

Funnily enough, there’s Northland Bank, in its usual place operating like any other day, (which was very strange. Though, what hasn't been strange ever since yesterday?) but he’s too scared to take a peek. What point will it serve looking at his own people, who wouldn’t even know him? As if he can come knocking at their doors and say, “Hey! I’m Number 11 of the Fatui Harbingers, Tartaglia; code name Childe!” 

Super smooth. Yeah right. He’d get immediately kicked out for 1) disrespecting the organisation 2) telling blatant lies. Heck, he isn't even sure if Harbingers exist in this world. Hopefully not, he would loathe to look at his colleagues… probably ex colleagues now. Though he is adamant on that status to be temporary.

.

Childe and the locals have been waiting for a good half an hour now, though people have started cheering now, he wonders when “Yanwang Dijun” would arrive. Talk about punctuality! Standing around and doing nothing has made his appetite worse. He finished off all the grilled tiger fish he bought, and there’s not even an inch of space for him to move to buy a few more because of the crowd. 

Slowly, a single yellow petal landed on his nose– just when he tried to blow it away, another fell on his hair then his shoulder. Now it was raining thousands of petals. 

Before he knew it, the tanggu rang loudly thrice. With a flourish many officials emerged from behind a silken golden embroidered door. They arranged themselves in two orderly lines and bowed their heads like a puppet would. 

The people around him followed suit and bowed as well, while Childe in his confusion just stood there dumbstruck. Until some A-yi grabbed hold of his arm and whispered, “Such blatant rudeness! You may be a foreigner but the least you can do is respect our lord.” 

He quickly lowered his head down and replied to the A-yi in haste, “I’m sorry! Was a bit surprised, I have no ill intent, promise.”

That seemed to be the right answer, as the A-yi smiled back and nodded to herself and pointed discreetly upwards. “Keep your eyes and ears open, for he will be arriving any second now,” she spoke in a hushed tone. 

It was like a fever dream, Yujing Terrace was filled with excited cheers and words of worship but now it was deadly silent, except for the bated breaths of those around him. Childe included. There was something about the presence of divinity that brought about certain feelings– of what? He wasn't sure.

Childe dared to take a peek, and the moment he did, those bright cor lapis eyes looked down on the crowd. For a moment it felt like those very eyes looked directly at him. The same eyes Zhongli had at Northland Bank… While handing over his gnosis. He barely faced Childe during the entire meeting. As if he didn’t even exist. Not a single word from Zhongli even after several days. He felt his reality crumbling. Is this really his life right now? Perhaps this was all just a cruel joke played by the gods or a morbid dream that he needs to wake up from. 

But no, it’s real. 

He tried sleeping it off yesterday, hoping to miraculously wake up in the bed of his apartment. His disappointment was immeasurable when he woke on the steps of Heyu Tea House. Once morning came, he received looks of pity from people passing by. Tea master Liu Siu even gave him a few mora meat. He wasn’t poor by any means in this new Liyue, he still had 3 large pouches of mora on his person, but he definitely wasn’t going to reject free food. 

Number 1 priority for now would be to look for a place to stay. He wasn’t keen on being a bother for other businesses. 

.

“So, how can I talk personally with Rex– uhh…. Yanwang Dijun?” Childe inquired Lao Guai. He has lost count of the number of people he’s spoken to regarding this question. 

The people of Teyvat always say that the Archons and Celestia have the answers and solutions to all mortal problems, so surely, Yanwang Dijun can send him back to his original world? Or at least know a few ways on how to send him back.

“Yes of course but ah.. There is one issue…,” twirling his beard between his fingers, Lao Guai drawled on his words. 

“And that is?” Childe quirked his brow, he has a feeling where this is going. 

“Dear boy, it’s Mora! Obviously.”

.

A heavy pouch was dropped onto Lao Guai's lap. Seemingly satisfied, he started talking. And it was the same beat up words, as if reading from some script. 

Get an appointment from the Qixing. 

The damned wrinkly Lao Guai even dared to say, “the fastest way to personally meet with Yanwang Dijun is by becoming his…. bed warmer.” He waggled his brows and continued, “and if I do say so myself, you would scrub up quite nicely with proper clothes.”

Childe prayed for Raiden Shogun to strike this old fart down with her famed Musou no Hitotachi that very moment. But he really shouldn’t. After all, you should pay respect to your elders. 

“I am being serious, young lad,” Lao Guai added sweetly. 

Maybe except for this particular weirdo. 

.

“No, I cannot let you in,” Baiwen replied in a very exasperated manner. 

“Just a minute, please. I only need to speak with him!” he pleaded, growing increasingly desperate with every word and this damned lady was not making it any easier. The two of them were arguing for a good while now.

Childe was at his breaking point. It had been weeks of trying to schedule appointments with “Yanwang Dijun” but he was turned away with the same excuses each time. 

“His imperial majesty is currently busy.” 

“He’s occupied with another appointment.” 

“The Adepti are meeting with him.” 

“Yanwang Dijun is currently in a deep slumber.”

And they dared to say the last one while he saw the Archon walk lazily out of that overly embellished golden screen door. 

Baiwen grimaced, whatever professional facade she had on was crumpled and you could see the deep furrow between her dark eyebrows,“I simply cannot.” 

“Why not? At least give me a reason, and not one of those same reused excuses,” Childe snapped. He’s not going to back away this time. He’s had enough and today he will meet with Yanwang Dijun. 

Perhaps what he said struck a chord with her, Baiwen was glaring at him with what he assumed… disgust. 

“There is no way I’d let such a suspicious person enter Yiyan Temple. Look at your attire! What on Teyvat are you wearing?” with a huff of disapproval she turned away but not before haughtily adding, “and furthermore, his imperial majesty is an incredibly important and busy person, he has no time to converse with nobodies like you.” 

“Now please, be off before I personally call upon the Millelith and get you removed from these sacred grounds.” 

With a resounding smack, Baiwen closed the heavy auburn wooden door, in front of Childe’s face. The impact caused him to stumble backwards, almost falling to the ground. Did she really smack the door on his face? But more importantly, the entire time, the officials didn’t let him in because he looked like a suspicious person? What? These officials sure sit on their high horse and someone really needs to pull them down. 

“Bastards,” he grumbled under his breath, frustration starting to seep into his mind. For people who act all sweet and nice, they sure knew how to get under someone’s skin. These officials need some training in humility. Heck, even the fatui have better manners than them. 

The “attire” he wore was a loose plain grey cotton inazuman-style outerwear, with a tie lying on the side of his waist with some baggy black pants underneath it. He always wore the white hooded robe on top, to hide his bright hair, otherwise people would keep staring at him. The hooded robe however, didn’t work as well as he’d thought, the locals would steal sneaky glances at him every time he’d pass by. 

“Suspicious my ass, just say it’s because you’re too concerned about status and hierarchy.” He looked menacingly at the door. Childe stepped back, his body slumping in resignation while mumbling, “you could have saved me all the trouble by telling me the truth, from the start.”  

He kicked the ornate door. 

A beat of silence passed. 

He kicked it once more, now with more force. 

Another beat of silence.

“How irritating.” 

Right when he was about to give up, Childe took a glance upwards and saw a lithe hooded figure passing by the long corridor. At first, he thought it was just another official, but he saw those amber tinted locks of hair fluttering in the wind as the figure walked. 

That’s him. Must be him. 

Childe immediately braced himself. He slowly crouched and leapt against the solid ground, forcing his way over the tall door and onto the long yellow corridors. He landed right in front of the hooded figure, on his knees and one hand as support. There was a cracking sound, probably his poor joints. He really shouldn’t be doing such stunts, but desperate times call for desperate measures. 

The Millelith had their spears pointed towards him, but he didn’t care. Rising from his position, Childe grabbed the hooded figure’s robes and pulled him close. He looked straight into those cor lapis eyes, devoid of any emotion. 

“Zhongli! Do you recognise me? It’s Childe, Tartaglia,” panic laden on his every word, Childe pulls his own hood down to reveal his face. Those golden eyes slightly widen at the sudden actions. 

He took his chance, and continued, “Please you must help me, only you can send me back to my original world.” At some point, his hands ended up grabbing onto the slope of Zhongli’s shoulder, pulling him even closer. The brunet stared questioningly into his deep abyssal eyes, they were so so close, he could feel the warm breaths on his own lips.

Before he could say any more, the cold rod of a spear was digging into his adam’s apple, pushing him back. One, two, three.. No, Five spears were pointed towards his body. Locking his every move. 

“Stay away from his imperial majesty! Someone of your stature should not touch him so. How dare you get your filthy hands upon him,” the young Millelith who had his spear on Childe’s neck yelled, trying to pull him back from Yanwang Dijun, but his body was immovable, as if his feet were embedded onto the flooring. 

Childe didn’t care. Status and rules be damned. It was now or never. Uncaring of the throbbing pain on his throat, he pressed on and desperately resumed his plea, “I, the 11th of the Fatui harbingers, Tartaglia, personally sent by her majesty The Tsaritsa to wreak havoc in Liyue by releasing Osial from his confines. I played as the scum villain for a test orchestrated by you, to relinquish your duties as an archon and hand over your gnosis. So that you could live a life as a common mortal.”

Maybe the Archon will take pity on him and solve his problems. Maybe he’ll order for the spears to be put down, maybe he’ll ask for them to release Childe and just maybe he might recogni–

“Looks like he’s out of it, come on now, this isn’t a place to be role-playing. Take him away!” All the Millelith around him laughed like crazy, as if they heard some really funny joke.

But it wasn’t a joke. He wished it was. Or some fever dream he’d have to wake up from. If it was a dream, why wasn’t he awake yet? Why is he still in this strange world with cold faces? Why is it so that he misses the tedious act of doing paperwork for the bank? He misses the way Xiangling would holler at him to have lunch with Guoba by her side waving at him enthusiastically. He misses the annoying lectures of Ekaterina. He misses the bickering between Vlad and Nadia. He misses those weekly sparring sessions with Lumine.��

He misses the feeling of those warm amber eyes looking at him with amusement. 

He misses his Liyue. 

Ah. 

He’s homesick, Childe realised. 

His thoughts were interrupted as he felt the Millelith dragging him away by his arms. His rock bottom reputation in this Liyue is ruined anyway, go big or go home.

“Please send me back to my world, can’t you gods solve everything?! Listen to this poor mortal’s troubles, I beg of you, send me back, Yanwang Dijun!” Childe kept yelling as he was dragged away by 2 Milleliths holding onto him. Both sighing at him.

“Quit your yapping, we get it! Just shut up and get outta here.” One of them smacked his head as the pair of them dragged his body down the corridor. 

“I’ll shut the fuck up if you release me. Send me back to my world! Unhand me! I’ll keep coming back if you don’t listen!” He struggled and trashed in their hold, craning his neck to look back at the stunned figure, now looking smaller and smaller as he was roughly taken away.

They kicked him out of the same red door. The damned heavy ornate door. He hopes that Zhon– Dijun somehow feels pity for him and does something, anything really. He contemplates and starts to aimlessly walk away from the temple. 

.

Meanwhile, Yanwang Dijun’s eyes followed the resigned boy’s figure move away from the entrance. How intriguing, he thought. He had never met such a strange human in his entire 6000 years of life. But his words did shock him. He was aware of the fact that different worlds do exist, though he never ventured deep into that knowledge so as not to stumble upon any forbidden knowledge, lest he caught the ire of Celestia. 

He is broken from his trance as Ninnguang, quietly speaks under her breath who was watching the entire scene unfold right behind him, “I wonder what that was… Weird fellow.”

“Your majesty, are you… Unharmed? Should I call for the healers?” Ganyu asks in concern, who was also next to Ninnguang. 

Very sweet of her to care for his health, however, it would be quite impossible for any mortal man to cause even a scratch on his face. “I’m quite fine, my child. Not to worry,” he says before a pause and inquires, “Ganyu, are you aware of any man named as… Childe or Tartaglia?”

Her blue hair whipped back and forth as she shook her head, “I’m afraid, I do not know, my lord. I have never heard of any one going by those peculiar names,” she replied, looking at him with confusion. 

“I see.” 

Peculiar name for a peculiar boy indeed. He does believe in this “Childe’s” story, contrary to the children surrounding him. After all, there is no one in this world, alive, who would know of his true name, Zhongli. 

It's been centuries since anyone called him by that name. Not even many of his immortal friends know about it. 

A small smile graced the Archon’s lips. Things were about to get interesting in his mundane life, it seemed.

Author’s Notes for Chapter 1

[1] Someone in white - The colour white is known as one of the unluckiest Chinese colours because it is associated with funerals.

[2] Apparatus that measures time - In China, it is considered inappropriate to give a clock to someone as it sounds similar to bidding farewell to them on their deathbed. This cultural belief associates giving someone a clock with sending them off to the afterlife.

[3] Luo 罗 - Common chinese last name.. it means: gauze, to collect, to gather, to catch, to sift

[4] Xiansheng - Mister (in this context)

[5] Yanwang Dijun - Rex Lapis’ name in CN

[6] Tanggu- Chinese drum

[7] A-yi - Middle aged lady/ aunt

[8] Lao Guai - Old Guai

[9] Guai (name) - Weirdo/strange (so basically the name Lao Guai means weirdo old man)

(A huge shout out to my fav jiejie helping me with the CN part of this fic, you’ve no idea how many times I badgered her for different ways of addressing people.)

[10] Baiwen - Ninnguang's secretary in genshin.

[11] Childe’s attire so this was the closest robes I could find to what I had in mind ( Which was more commoner like and roughed out in texture) but make it grey like his in-game uniform.

Though, in Karin san’s art he’s wearing super loose robes that expose his chest, which is covered by white bandages and is also wearing some dark choker with a little tassel in the middle. Karin san also mentions that Childe is partially cross dressing? Perhaps the attire he wore was a bit more on the feminine side shrugs. In that context, I do suppose Childe being refused to enter would make more sense. But I opted for the status/commoner/nobody route.

[12] So before you guys get confused with the constant switching between Childe saying: Rex Lapis, Yanwang Dijun or Zhongli. To summarise, he says yanwang dijun when he’s talking with people of this parallel world Liyue, but when it’s him thinking or talking to himself in his mind, he says Rex Lapis or Zhongli. Probably says Zhongli when he feels emotional or remembers stuff.

[13] Yiyan Temple - A huge yellow/golden building you will see in Yujing Terrace, people come to worship and give offerings to the Geo Archon here. You will see an NPC called Bu’yun (Jade chamber guide) right next to it in the game.

I decided to make Yiyan Temple as Dijun’s home/place of work because it made sense, even though initially I wrote Jade Chamber but… For that, Childe would need to learn how to fly because no way he could reach the sky from a jump…this isn’t a xianxia story :”D

[14] Isekai - I’ll be roughly explaining this because while writing this fic, I was confused if this was even isekai in the first place? So let’s break it down! Isekai itself basically means “another world” and there are two types of isekai (which I’ll explain soon) and the new world could be anything! From parallel worlds, fantasy world, a video game, a novel, you name it.

a) Isekai tensei = in which the protagonist is reincarnated into another world (that’s the literal translation btw) by… well dying xD cause of death is usually by our favourite!! Truck-kun!! If not, many other reasons e.g. choking on a dumpling, being murdered, falling down a 3 storey building, etc. So there’s actually a sub-genre of this particular isekai, in which, after death, the soul of the protagonist occupies the body of another living being from the new/other world. This is called transmigration. Though some people consider transmigration to be a separate type of isekai on its own.

b) Isekai ten’i = in which the protagonist is either summoned into the new world or is teleported to it (again, the literal translation) via some item or channel that connects it to the new world. In this type of isekai, the protagonists don’t die. It’s something like sneaking into your uncle’s wardrobe and walking into some snowy plains of narnia.

[15] NPCs - all of the side characters that are in this fic are all in game characters and NPCs. You’ll find them if you search them up. At first I thought linking the NPCs to genshin wiki would be cool but then my author’s note would become incredibly long…er than it already is TT I’m sorry.

Alright, my comrades, I hope my unnecessary rambling in the author’s notes wasn’t so boring. You will see me with another chapter… I already have the second chapter outlines, just need to write it out. But it's currently exam season and I've been busy so next update might be around late November. Check me out on my twitter / ao3 / wattpad if you're interested! I go by @nuttytani for all :DD

(also unsure if anyone actually wants to get tagged for this multi chapters fic, if you are interested, let me know!)

[rottencoreflesh101]

Note:

Warning: Kny Spoilers, discussion of aged up characters, mentions of MAPs, mentions of CSA.

I wanna start off saying that I simply do not mind if after this if y’all don’t want to support me and that’s totally fine. You can block or unfollow me however it does best for you.

My Opinion: I don’t mind aged up characters and I wont stop making them bc I simply do not like working with children. If I wanna draw Tanjiro, I will draw Tanjiro from my AU (unless its an unproblematic comm), Tanjiro is 19 years old in my au, same age as me. Genya on the other hand is 20 years old in my au and this is the Genya I use for every post I make about him.

Yes, aging up characters is a problematic subject but It all really depends how it’s portrayed for me. Please make sure the character you are aging up looks like an adult and not like their canonical child look.

Take in mind that fictional characters don’t grow up like us real humans. So we as the fandom create aus where characters grow up and do grown up stuff. Genya in this case, he canonically dies but in my au he survived his death and grew up and so on and on he continues to live his life, aging up, killing demons, settling down with a lover and have a family bc thats what I want for him.

What I do find unacceptable in the aging up act, is when ppl create content of adult x minor and use the “Well they’re an adult in this piece ☝️🤓” while the canon minor characters is still portrayed and looked as a minor. That is creepy behavior and triggering content.

I found out about Genya when I was 18 in october 2021, my friend who introduced me to it told me Genya was 18 and since I didn’t even knew from where he was I just believed him to be 18. January of 2023 was when I started to know more about KNY and get into it and that's when I found out that he was canonically 16 years old. I went a full on year and a half believing this mf was 18 like me so I decided to use my art skills to design him an older version of himself, one that can grow up with me and play a role with my kny ocs.

Now with that being said. I will NOT tolerate anyone calling me a MAP/Pedophile. I do not show predatory behavior. It is absolutely unacceptable for someone who doesn’t know anything about my stuff to call me a heavy life ruining word just bc I aged up a fictional character that doesn’t exist.

I will NOT tolerate being called a pedo in any form or shape just bc I aged up fictional characters. I AM NOT a MAP, I will not stand being compared next to my abuser, who is a real pedo who abused me and many other children.

I do believe fiction can impact reality. A great example is tv shows where they show sharks as these dangerous aggressive creatures and now we believe that sharks are dangerous animals while in reality they’re super cute and silly lil guys.

Conclusion: I age up characters. It is a touchy subject in the internet but I dont find anything wrong with it. If you no longer want to support me then feel free to unfollow and block me but I will bite back, delete or block anyone who dares to call me something so horrible. Instead of aiming your child protective services attitude towards me, aim it to real abusers, ppl who create content of cp.

If this harassment continues, I will take my leave. I downloaded Tumblr to relieve my old good memories, a safe space, to meet ppl like me not to be harassed bc I age up characters and for being a NSFW artist. May this be the first and last note regarding this situation. My mental health comes first, my heart condition's peace comes first, I am not in the mood to have heart therapy again.

[romanarose]

Hello there ✨️ love your work 💕 I'm a long time fan 🫶🏼. I've been on tumblr a few years now, but I'd never found the courage to post anything of my own til now. I've been feeling a little optimistic these days, and genuinely excited about posting some of my writing and sharing it with the people out here. Do you have any advice on how to start posting and interacting from scratch? Cause I'm low-key nervous abt it and it seems like my target audience has already formed a solid community I don't know how to get into 🥺

Wow, this might be the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me wowie!!!!!!

okay let me tell my advice

The numbers don't equal quality. Certain things appeal to people more, like shorter stories, straight up smut, Joel Miller gets way more than when I write Marc. I think one of my best works was my Marc X Jewish!Reader series, Seattle, but it idnt get anywhere really even at the height of moon knight popularity bc people dont read OC's esp ethnic oc's. Put your heart into it and those who enjoy it will enjoy it. I had a William Miller series that averaged like 8-20 notes per chapter but I had a handful of readers I knew adored it and thats what mattered

This site is so much better with interaction. PLEASE DON"T ONLY INTERACT FOR THE SAKE OF GETTING FRIENDS WHO"LL REBLOG!! However, if you dont already, make sure you are reblogging stories and leaving nice words! Me personally, if someone reblogs regularly and leave nice words, espcially things that show they really paid attention, I usually just follow back bc I love friends. Im happy to get to know you!

Yes, it's hard sometimes to break it. It took a few months for me to get into the Oscar Issac writer circles, and then when I started writing Pedro it took a while too but I always reblogged and tried to communicate and I made friends. Isn't it crazy we can just.... become friends with our fav writers? Obvs Im not friends with all my favs but MOST of my favs became my friends <3

It's kinda annoying to me bc Im bad at it but aesthetics help. Title, a picture to catch eyes, summary, warnings, note. Try to make it look nice. Im really had at this LMFAOOOOOO. My lovely friends have made my best looking banners. If you have graphic design skills, use them! i wish i didn't have to but it does help catch readers when you have an interesting headers and everything looks pretty.

Few technicals. Use the readmore option. No one wants to reblog a LOOOOOONG story and clog up the feeds. Use as many correct tags as you can. Tag any triggering content. And I'm the worst at this but proof read. Im bad at proof reading, everyone who reads my work knows spelling, grammar, wrong words are a common issue I have bc Im bad at typing. When I still had word on my laptop I started typing in word and using text to speach to help me catch stuff!

Keep at it! IDK where you know my work, weather moon knight, triple frontier or tlou or whatever but all those fandoms right now are like.... a little less active. So don't be dissapointed if it takes a while. With TLOU, theres SOOOOOOO many amazing writers. With Moon Knight theres just less buzz rn. If you write for lesser known characters like Llewyn Davis or Will Miller, you probs won't reach the notes of established writers in Joel Miller. Just the reality. the point is keep going, find what you like and what gets people excited and go from there

This is the most important. Write what you want. I mean it. I love writing Will Miller because he's my special man <3 even though it's a small fanbase. My series Rooms On Fire, a lot have lost interest bc its a long series. That's okay! I love the series and it makes me happy to write it. I wrote a few Miguel O'Hara stories because, I'm being honest here, I wanted to capitalize on the hype. Guess what? They weren't good. I'm not proud of them. Since then, I write what Im inspired to.

THIS SHOULD BE FUN AND IF AT ANY POINT, IT"S NOT FUN STOP AND FIGURE OUT WHY

feel free to say hi off anon! I'm always happy to get to know new people. If you like Triple Frontier, I have a discord server that is pretty much open to everyone! I'm trying to revive it and you can share your works and meet knew people!

Anon or not, let me know if you have any questions!

[tumblunni]

DR SNAP I LOVE YOU AAAAA

guys I just heard about a NEW SCIENCE GRANDPA *slams fist on the table* FUCK YEAH I will hug all the this one specific character type until the end of time

What's even better is that he seems to straight up actually be Nice Hojo, aka the first science villain I ever liked and then was Incredibly Betrayed By when he turned from funny sassy sidekick guy to child abuse fetal experimentation super duper ultra murder potentially-rape-potentially-domestic-abuse man. And then incredibly confused when his final boss fight tried to be all feelsy and sad and I was just like ok so we are backpedalling to what I wanted him to be but it is too late sorry!! Still the best boss fight ever tho, fuckin punch him in the face three times in increasing monsteriness for not living up to my cute gramp hopes. ALSO HOW DARE YOU BECOME A COOL MONSTER TOO, YOU DONT DESERVE SUCH A NEAT DESIGN

So yeah

This dude

IS CUTE GRAMP AND ALSO ALMOST EXACTLY THE SAME MONSTER DESIGN???

Underappreciated man Dr Snap from Dragon Quest Monsters: Joker 1! Also his monster boss form is called Dr Snapped and I'm just like mmyes gud pun, thankyee

He is still a mad science villain yes, but he is very polite and endearing and round and soft!! And has a spooky final boss form that's even more terrifying than Helletic Hojo and has a cool aesthetic with the floaty orbs and also lil skittery centi-legs. Pretty much the only thing I don't like here is the weird jowls, I dunno why but that creeps me out the most. I guess just cos it looks close to a normal human face but like if the cheek meats were all sliced up and melting. Thankfully the game doesn't seem to indicate that he's in pain in any way, so that's a relief. He' like WEIRDLY POLITE AND CHEERFUL ABOUT EVERYTHING INCLUDING BECOMING A HELLBEAST

Good boy. Soft mans. Sweet grampe.

"oh whoopsie doopsie I appear to have dropped my arms and earlobes, sorry about that sonny"

Srsly he's not going "I'm a monster"in horror here, his next line is basically "yay this wasn't part of my plan but this is even better!"

His entire villain plan is just cos he loves and cherishes monsters too much, and embodies all the virtues of a monster tamer to a dangerous extreme. He thinks monsters are more pure and good than humanity and the only way to truly get humanity to live with them in peace is to let monsters take over the world entirely. And he's like "oh golly gosh my dream came true" when he becomes the world's scariest goddamn Frankenstein centipede, and is happy that he can fix the world even more super duper double much by making everyone become monsters too! It'll solve all problems!! Somehow!! The key to eternal peace is becoming cute abominations like me, yay!!

Srsly wtf he's so endearing I absolutely adore him AND ALSO HIS PHILOSOPHY IS BASICALLY THE SAME AS ME WHEN IM PLAYING ANY GAME WHERE I HAVE TO FIGHT MONSTERS. Like I was excited about this joker game in the first place cos I always feel sad having to kill all those cute designs in the dragon quest series!!! I wanna be their friend!!! It's a shame that this came out before dqix tho so it doesn't have that cute cow pattern vampire bat thingie or the slug with lips. THEY WERE MY FOREVER FRIENDS

So yeh I'm kinda sad that from what I've heard the game isn't sympathetic to Dr Snap at all despite making him FUCKIN ADORABLE and his entire motives being exactly the same as yours, just corrupted. I would have expected some sort of ending where you can convince him he's wrong and have a big speech about a better solution and stuff, and it's all motivational? Cos srsly it just seems like he somehow lost faith in humanity and felt like this extreme solution was the only way to achieve peace. I wonder if he had some sort of sad backstory where he saw a forest of monsters killed by humans polluting the environment or something. Or lived a sad childhood and his only friend was a pet monster that died defending him from his abusive parents. OR BOTH. Srsly I just feel like it takes a big trauma to lead to a guy being this messed up cos I know my own "humans suck, I will always side with the monsters detsroying humanity" feels come from being abused as a kid.

BUT NO

JUST

HE BAD HE DIE

Also the damn weirdness of your own monster partner saying "he's no longer human so we have to kill him"

I never fuckin understand "being non human in any way equals automatically evil and no human rights" as a morality. Morality should always be about what you DO, not what you are! This dude is still 100% sentient and going golly gosh all over the place but now it's okay to murder him without even trying to talk him down???

Apparently you can actually unlock his monster form as a playable party member in the sequel, but it's not actually him and just like.. same species, by merging some other species together.

But no I choose to reject that reality and instead believe that we motivational speech'd him and restored his faith in humanity and ended the fight without a murder, and he stopped his plan and just went home with us to be our wonderful new eldritch grandpa forever. And now he works hard to make up for his sins, and also do research on monsterness from the monster perspective so we can find even more ways to bring friendship and peace to the two worlds. And someone sewed him a new cute fancy labcoat to fit all his extra tentacle arms!! And little glasses with sticky pads on the nose bridge so they stay on even though his head is kinda indented in his torso now. Also he can hug twice as many baby Slimes with all the extra limbs, yes!!!!! MY ELDRITCH GRAMPS BAKES ELDRITCH COOKIES AND THIS IS THE ONLY ENDING I WILL EVER ACCEPT

So uhh yeh anyways this has been bunni accidentally stumbling upon the ending to a game they've never played via pixiv and now being filled with the strongest fire to play it

I MUST SEE THE WHOLE STORY OF GRAMP...

Also thank u to pixiv user [D.J] who makes many fanarts of obscure sad science villain grandpas getting cuddles and happiness. I feel like my goddamn soul twin is living on the other side of the planet where I can never tell them how much I love their art :(

[olderthannetfic]

Ah, I do see your points, anon. I'm not going to post all your asks publicly because if you really feel that unsafe, it's probably best not to have a bigass chunk of your text for people to analyze and try to guess your identity from. I think one of the best points you made is about how close to home it hits when the non-fave is not only your fave but is similar to you in some way like demographic. You're not wrong for having those emotions. I do wonder if they make it hard to see how some other people feel similarly embattled on other axes.

TBH, I think one of the big problems here is that the large aggregate patterns you're talking about are racist, but most individual fics and fans are not really the problem. It's hard to know how to talk about this or who to tell to "fix" it when we're looking at free, hobbyist art.

A lot of people's tastes are certainly formed by shitty society, but once they're formed, they don't change fast if at all. Asking someone to rewrite their libido is a big ask, yet tumblr does it all the time as though it's as simple as snapping your fingers.

This leaves me with the sense that a lot of tumblr is... like... the political lesbians of porn fic or something: desire is not real, only choosing based on logic and politics. Or maybe people are so asexual that they just don't understand the lizard brain's "YES!" at some porn things and complete indifference to others?

I don't think it's great if great swaths of people feel like bottom!Nicky is super hot and top!Nicky fundamentally isn't, but I also don't think they can necessarily just turn it off like flipping a switch.

(If someone reading this doesn't like their current tastes and wants to attempt to alter them, I do think it's possible. What you should do is line up a large slate of media that prominently features characters of the ethnicity or whatever that you don't find hot/interesting. These should be leads whose emotional development drives the plot and is supposed to be central to the audience's enjoyment of the media. Watch/read/etc. this media all the time. All. The. Time. Try out many pieces because you won't like every character or every show, and we're looking for genuine enjoyment, not the fandom equivalent of a pity fuck. Spend enough time on this, and your unconscious sense of who's hot and interesting will eventually shift somewhat. This is a project you should expect to take a few years.)

But I digress.

The one tweet thing is a very toxic pattern. If TOG fandom is doing that, guys, please try to be more conscious of holding the actors of color to a higher standard (or the women or whomever). I know this often comes from a place of paying more attention to our own and wanting to set a good standard, but the effect is that minorities can't fuck up ever while white dudes get infinite passes.

Okay, on to the fic thing... Gotta say, my instant reaction to that description is "Ooh!"--as it would be for the same scenario with the characters reversed. (Ships who start out trying to kill each other are my favorite! x1000 if they're resurrecting style immortals and they literally do.) I can see how it would feel like slamming into a brick wall if you aren't kinky in just the right way and you didn't know it was coming though.

Part of why I react so strongly to a lot of discourse that runs along these lines is that I am a naturally extremely kinky person. It's not so much about what I do (which as a deeply lazy person in a long distance relationship is essentially nothing), but it's absolutely how I'm wired.

And I can tell you that my quotidian experience in fandom is sharing something I don't even realize is a big deal only to have someone I like, respect, and trust react in horror and tell me that it's triggering and awful and should not be allowed in fandom spaces because it makes "people" unsafe. It's such an instant, kneejerk reaction they don't even realize I was sharing it because it spoke to the very core of me. Lesson learned, friend. Lesson learned.

That sounds a bit off topic, I know, but bear with me: The point of that anecdote is that it's pretty common for me to get people trying to raise my awareness of things I have already thought deeply about while denying my essential humanity and not even realizing. As a kinky person who likes to make my fave the top (and generally a conflicted sadist), this constant request to explain and justify is exhausting.

I doubt most of the top!Joe fans have this precise problem simply because people who make their fave the top are much less common in fandom than people who make their fave the bottom, but I see a similar pattern with fans who are just fundamentally wired for rape fantasies (one of the most common fantasies that exists) vs. fans who just don't get rape fantasies at all. Or substitute your BDSM/kinky/messed up fantasy trope of choice. Covertly radical feminist attitudes towards kink and power are on the rise in fandom, and as a naturally kinky person, boy do I notice it!

I know that it feels like crucial activism to share these insights about why the ratio of top!Joe is hurtful, and the pain you feel is real. But it's also the case that it's a big ask to want people to listen. (Not me. Obviously, I routinely choose to engage with discourse. I mean overall.) The reason for that is that you're only seeing a fraction of what they do or who they are, and you don't know how many previous people they've listened to how many previous times. It's a very different situation from someone whose job is making some major TV series or movie or something. That person does, in my opinion, owe you some amount of listening.

Now, I'm not saying no top Joe fan was ever a jerk. I'll bet they were. There's a tendency to be rude and to publicly air your schadenfreude when you feel like everyone has been yelling at you. What I am saying is that a lot of the problem here boils down to conflicting needs, and that means there isn't a good solution. It's a situation where people are genuinely hurt, but I don't necessarily agree that other people have harmed them.

I like that you did an actual count of the explicit fics, btw. It's good to look at the real numbers. I see too little of that in these situations. My off the cuff reaction is that 2/3 to 1/3 is not a bad ratio at all compared to many fandoms, but yeah, it definitely shows a strong trend, and that can be painful. (I have a fandom where I think there's maybe like 1 bottom so-and-so fic in the entire zine era fandom. One. It's pretty extreme.)

I guess my thinking here overall is: What is the practical solution? What are we hoping to gain? What is reasonable to ask of people?

And it can't be "Well, if they would just listen..." That's just a sneaky way of saying "If you haven't done it my way, it's because you haven't listened to me yet."

So the question I would ask of people is this:

What does a non-racist fic where Joe tops look like?

What does a non-racist sex pollen, dubcon, or even noncon fic where Joe tops look like?

And if you say the latter is impossible... well... sadists exist everywhere in the world. So do doms. So do people who prefer to top in a purely physical sense. People with rape fantasies where they're the rapist exist (people who are not actually rapists, I mean). None of this is restricted to any one group. We can't categorically say fic like that about Joe is coming from a place of racism without denying the fundamental humanity of kinky MENA people who'd want to make Joe like themselves or like their ideal partner. (Yes, I agree this won't be the majority of fic writers writing top!Joe, but this is a place to start for figuring out what the better version would look like.)

IDK, maybe you're that kinkster yourself, but your asks gave me the vibe that you don't really get the drive towards those darker kinds of fics and what might be motivating it besides stereotypes and shittiness.

If we can answer these kinds of questions, we can better critique the way people write what they write without telling them all of their taste is bad and they should just stop writing. Even if we think the latter is true, it isn't going to get us anywhere. Figuring out how to make Joe more multidimensional in the fic they already want to write or finding very specific wording that should be avoided might actually work.

Beyond that, the actions I think are productive would be running prompt fests, exchanges, or other events for bottom!Joe or for top!Joe where he's the main character and the fics are required to be from his POV. Themed collections and recs lists are great. (I've seen a bit of this going around in TOG fandom in the past, and that's an excellent approach! Keep it up!) Positive actions tend to work better here. Make more of what you want. Promote what you want to see.

I don't mean this in some fluffy magical thinking way: you aren't going to change that ratio radically just by the power of positivity. But I've seen this kind of thing play out in many, many fandoms, and going after the people who write what you don't like, even in a well-intentioned effort to educate and even in a polite, kind way doesn't do much. A few people feel guilty. A few feel defensive. A lot ignore you. The overall fic doesn't change. It's not a good use of your limited time and energy.

I'm off to look up that fic to see what I think of it in practice, but I'm going to post this before tumblr manages to eat it.

[hatsukeii]

Okay I know I’ve reposted something of the sort but I’m just fucking annoyed now so I’m doing it myself.

STOP FUCKING OVERSEXUALISING SAN IM SO FED UP WITH IT IM DONE IM DONE IM DONE IM SO ABSOLUTELY FUCKING FINISHED WITH SOME FANS PURELY LOOKING TO HIM FOR FETISHISATION OR TO SATIFY THEIR THIRST THOUGHTS PLEASE IM BEGGING AT THIS POINT

I know I haven’t been in the fandom for long and yes I’ve definitely said things that go into the category of hard stan (cough on my knees for no one but he’s an exception type stuff but nothing more than that considering I am very much a minor) but does that equate to me seeing San as a sex object? NO, NO, AND NO.

San has been my favourite since I checked Ateez out, and if not for his stunning performance and killer looks I’m gonna be honest I wouldn’t have actually looked more into the group, I genuinely thank him for bringing me into the fandom and introducing me to eight very talented and interesting people. San himself is extremely good looking, very charismatic, and is obviously one of the more emotional and sensitive members of the group. It’s what makes him so endearing, the way he nudges people with his head as a sign of wanting affection, or how he’s always the first to bring comfort to other members, he’s a living human being with actual emotions and issues that people seem to look past very often.

Now what really makes me disappointed is the way some stans don’t realise how uncomfortable and insecure they can make San just by doing stuff like zooming in on body parts for thirst posts or commenting on nothing but his body whenever the slightest bit is exposed. I’ve been into them for less than a month and even I know that he gets very insecure at times, he wants people to like him for him, wants to be the best performer you could see, and it eats him up whenever he doubts himself. All selfish stans care about is their own lewd thoughts and needs that just have to be satisfied by, I don’t know, someone with a killer set of abs and a handsome face. I don’t know if you guys are slow in the fucking head, but I’ll break it down for you. If you would not like to be talked about in a purely physical and sexual context, the idol would not like to be talked about in a physical and sexual context either.

And since you know me I’m a writer on Tumblr I’ve obviously tried looking for fanfiction and what do you know it’s pages amongst pages of pure filthy smut. Now I’m not saying you can’t write that, erotica is a means of expressing art in the form of writing and that is valid, but coming from someone who doesn’t enjoy erotica who has skimmed through some of these posts I just gotta say it has made me very uncomfortable, but that’s a very personal issue, I’m just putting that out there to prove how he’s constantly being sexualised by people, well meaning or not.

I’m someone who goes through waves of very bad insecurity and sadness and to have to watch someone I admire put up with shit like this with the addition of people actively making it worse and him very obviously feeling upset and uncomfortable about it pains me to an extent. Yes, fireworks promotion had him looking very very good in revealing clothing, but do you not see how uneasy he is constantly trying to hide his abdomen, or holding things against his torso? Please stop doing this to him. He’s so much more than just the guy who dances like a demon or the guy who wore a backless shirt to MAMA or the hot dude doing body waves in a crop top or yada yada yada. He’s Choi San, someone who’s worked very hard and gone through a lot to get to where he is both in the idol scene and in the mental scene. Hell I’d go as far as to say that he probably still struggles with his own mental health regarding body image and self worth, and obnoxious fucking fans are not helping at all.

And if I see any comments that go along the lines of “but he’s so hot in the crop top I have to zoom it🥺🥺🥺” or “he’s wearing barely nothing on top he was asking for it” I hate you just keep that in mind. I don’t want to hear you say you’re a fan of Ateez, because you obviously aren’t. Get off my page, unfollow me, I don’t care. I don’t want you here.

Ok n e ways stream deja vu and eternal sunshine

[0soul0]

-- Rules --

Do your best to read them!

This blog does not tolerate pedophilia, racism, xenophobia, lgbtphobia, zoophilia, ableism, non-rp blogs that engage without my consent, vagueposting, or fetish rp blogs.

If you unfollow me/do not want me to engage, please softblock me for both of us.

Please do not interact if you are under the age of 18 IRL. in addition, transphobic, homophobic, incest, rape, bestiality, racist, and pedophilia-related content is NOT WELCOME HERE. I am not afraid to work with dark themes, but that kind of content is too far for me personally. respect it or dip, your choice.

This blog is crossover/doubles/oc friendly! I will treat everyone as if we belong together, especially Boyfriend rpers or characters who know/are affiliated with Boyfriend. (Unless you state otherwise)

I love shipping! I love it so so much. But be prepared to do a little work with me. I do NOT like cheating rps however and will find any excuse to not cheat. Please I fucking hate cheating, I will work my way around it, but do not assume I'm cheating on GF/advocating cheating.

I am open to dark themes, but I prefer to discuss it first with my partner about what kind of things we’re comfortable with or not. However, like the first rule says, I am not okay with themes involving transphobia, homophobia, incest, rape, bestiality, racism, and pedophilia. We can do plenty of dark themes while being mindful, come stab my character!

If you vagueblog anyone, I will unfollow and block you. I do not care if you are right or they are wrong– I will not tolerate this. Keep the drama to yourself. I'm not interested.

If i have blocked any of your blogs, do not interact with me from any new ones that you make. You are blocked for a reason. I do not want to engage with you, even if I don't know it's you.

Feel free to ask for my discord! Especially if we are mutuals and if you’d like to plan things out ooc. I am also available to both mutuals and non-mutuals through tumblr dms.

My muse has the potential to be very powerful, though he in his base form is usually not, despite that I will not ever godmod without your explicit permission. Please extend the same courtesy to me, and if I do ever ask for permission, please don't feel obligated to say yes! I promise i will not be offended if you say no; your comfort comes first to me.

I do not stay up to date with much of the FNF fandom. Especially the drama. I'm also not yet into every mod out there, so please don't just assume I know something and get mad at me for not knowing. I don't want drama, I don't want problems: I just want to roleplay, make some new friends and have a good time!

[black-emporium-exchange]

How to sign up for Black Emporium!

Yes sweet nuglets, it's that time of year again: Time to sign up for Black Emporium!

CLICK HERE TO SIGN-UP!

Helpful Links:

How to Guide || Requests on Ao3 || Tagset || Nominations Spreadsheet || Request Database || Parent Collection (All Past Years)

Main hubs:

@black-emporium-exchange || black_emporium @ Dreamwidth || blackemporiumex on Twitter || AO3 Subcollection || Discord

Signups end: July 17, 2021 @ 8:00PM EDT || Countdown

CHANGES THIS YEAR

- We now have a brand new Request Database this year! Unlike previous years where mods had to hand copy requests into a separate Google Doc, the Database will automatically populate who and what people are requesting. (Should come in handy when writing treats or looking for inspiration.)

A STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE TO SIGN-UPS BELOW THE CUT:

1. Sign in to Ao3

If you don’t have an Ao3 account, contact the mods for help!

2. Go to the Black Emporium signup field (link)

3. Scroll to the “Requests” field

There are several different components of this field:

Relationship:

Enter one, two, or three approved relationships that you would like to see in a fanwork created for you. This field will autosuggest approved pairings. If your pairing does not show up, it may be that you have fallen victim to a known bug of Ao3's that we cannot fix, wherein pairings in a tagset do not autofill. If this happens, simply type it in as it appears in the tagset.

Additional Tags: You can request fanfic, fanart, or both. Selecting "any" is treated the same as selecting both.

Letter: If you have written a letter on an external website (such as Tumblr/Wordpress/Dreamwidth/Google Docs), you may link it here.

Description: Here is where you can provide additional detail about what you would like to see in a fanwork, both in general and for specific pairings. Good things to include (in this box, a letter, or both) are general likes and dislikes, preferred content rating, and Do Not Wants. Please remember to put your DNW's (do not wants) in the Ao3 sign up form - we can only take action if you put your DNW in your Ao3 sign-up form because it is the only thing we can absolutely guarantee that your creator will be able to access.

Remember that anyone who creates fanwork for you must respect your Do Not Wants. If you do not enter anything into this box, and you do not have a link to a letter, we will assume that means you are okay with anything for the specified pairing(s). If you have any preferences or things you do not want, we would encourage you to add them. It makes the process smoother for all involved.

Here are some things commonly put in the description box:

Likes/Wants:

- Frequently it can be considered helpful to your author or artist if they have some idea of what you like to see, and what you don't. For example:

I love F!Adaar/Sera because I think the idea of them merrily pranking their way around Skyhold is so much fun. Please don't write me something sad about them.

Do Not Wants:

- Stuff that makes you uncomfortable, or just plain stuff that is Not Your Thing. While the Black Emporium does not believe in kink shaming or otherwise insulting people for their own personal taste, we do want people to let their artists or authors know what their limits are. You don't have to give any reasons for this; "no x/y/z" gives your creator plenty of info to discern where your limits are.

We can only take action if someone writes you something against your DNWs if it is in your sign-up.

Prompts:

Prompts can be just about anything, but they're meant to be ideas that you'd like to see that can help give your artist or author something to work off of. Sometimes this can be a prompt or a question you'd like explored (for example: What if Solas found himself falling for M!Trevelyan? How would he feel about potentially falling for a human?) or an idea you'd love to see (Josie and M!Cadash snuggled up in front of a fire, please!) or just a few words of inspiration (Leliana/Josephine - secrets, lies, ravens).

Details about your character(s):

It is fairly common for people to give basic descriptions of their characters if it is a character where their appearance or personality may vary (ex: Wardens/Hawkes/Inquisitors), particularly if fanart is requested. These descriptions can be very basic indeed (ex: purple hawke), or extremely detailed (ex: This is Celeste Trevelyan, she loves her squad more than life itself, pink hair, dusky-rose skin, built like she could bench press you six ways from sunday).

Bucket Requests:

You may also use the description field to note additional pairings that you would be willing to receive. You may find this option helpful if you are willing to consider different Warden or Inquisitor backgrounds for your specified pairing that have been nominated. You are limited to an additional ten pairings specified in this manner. Please fill out the form entirely before filling in pairings manually in the description; those that you fill in in the relationship field (the first 30) will take priority.

Things you should not put in the description field:

“I would like anything but nasty [kink]. I think people who write that are gross and nasty.”

Please do not insult people who like something you dislike. It’s Not For You, and That’s Okay. “No [kink]” expresses this much better than a long explanation of why you don’t like [kink].

“I’m only choosing this to get to three nominations. Please don’t write it.”

While we know someone who signs up for a, b and z may want a and/or b more than z, but please don’t scream to your author or artist that what you may well match on is something you don’t want as much as other pairings. Writing something like this also reduces your chance at treats as well.

“Even though I said I wanted M!Solavellan, I’m fine with F!Solavellan too if you like that better.”

Please don’t tell people that you’d be alright with non-nominated pairings, as fics with only non-nominated pairings cannot be added to the collection.

Minimums and Maximums in Requests:

You are required to fill out a minimum of three request fields (Required: Relationship, Additional Tags; Optional: Letter, Description). Remember that you may put in one OR two relationships per request field, so the maximum number of pairings that you can list in this manner is thirty. Remember also that you must fill out at least 3 request fields, so if you fill 2 out with 3 requests in each "request box", Ao3 will still want you to add one more -- it's a good rule of thumb to fill at least three out with one request, then double up as you wish.

4. Continue to the “Offers” field

There are several different components of this field:

Relationship:

Enter one, two, or three approved relationships that you would like to see in a fanwork created for you. This field will autosuggest approved pairings. If your pairing does not show up, it may be that you have fallen victim to a known bug of Ao3's that we cannot fix, wherein pairings in a tagset do not autofill. If this happens, simply type it in as it appears in the tagset. If it continues to give an error, please drop us a comment with the pairing so we can figure out what's going on. You also have the option to select any relationship.

By selecting “Any Relationship,” that means that you are willing to write or draw fanwork for, literally, ANY of the approved pairings.

The only limitation we will accept will be be a limitation of what category of relationship you want to create for: eg, Any F/F, Any M/M, Any F/M, Any Multi, Any Other, or Any Nonbinary. Anything else WILL BE REJECTED. You may NOT use this option to say, for example, “Any Cullen pairing”. This option is for any and all of the approved pairings in your designated category/categories. Do not use this option unless you are sure that any is truly what you want.

Additional Tags:

You can offer to create fanfic, fanart, or both. Selecting "any" is treated the same as selecting both.

Comments for mods:

Here is where you can provide additional detail about what you will and won’t create. As with your requests, you can provide general likes and dislikes as well as things that you absolutely will not do. If there is someone signed up you absolutely cannot stand, please write "don't match me to x" here; we won't ask details, we just won't match and this will be a fully confidential field. If you hate nugs, put it here, and we'll make sure you get at least one nug-free prompt and, ideally, a nug-free sign-up. We want you to have an assignment you'll be happy about, so if you've got something that would be triggering for you to create for, let us know. We can only take action based on our own knowledge, so the more information we have the better we can try to match you with what you really want. If you do not enter anything into this box, we will assume that means you are okay with anything for the specified pairing(s) selected. If you have any preferences or do not wants, we would encourage you to add them. It makes the process smoother for all involved. None of the mods will blab over whatever you write; we just want you to have the best time possible with your assignment.

Minimums and Maximums in Offers:

You are required to fill out a minimum of three offer fields (Required: Fandom, Relationship, Additional Tags; Optional: Comments to mods). Remember that you may put in one or two relationships per request field, so the maximum number of pairings that you can list in this manner is twenty. Remember also that you must fill out at least 3 offer fields, so if you fill 2 offer fields out with 2 offers in each "box", Ao3 will still want you to add one more offer field even though you have one over the minimum required amount of offers -- it's a good rule of thumb to fill at least three offer fields, each with one offer, then go back and double up or not, as you wish.

Bucket Offers:

You may also use the comments to mod field to note additional pairings that you would be willing to write if you have already filled thirty slots. You may find this option helpful if you are willing to consider different Warden or Inquisitor backgrounds for your specified pairing. You are limited to an additional ten pairings specified in this manner. Once again, those filled in the actual relationship: tags will take priority over those written in, so choose which pairing goes where carefully!

A Note on Matching

Black Emporium runs on OR matching, which means that you will match on one relationship out of the ones that you offer and request. You are guaranteed to match on ONE relationship; you may match on more, you may not. For your assignment, you can write what you matched on OR you can write any other couple on their sign-up form. You will only have to write or draw for ONE request, not all of them. The minimums will be one piece of artwork or one 1,000 word fic.

[lucemferto]

WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT PH1LZA (or Why Philza is a Victim of Narrative Circumstance)

Heyo! Per request I am posting the script to my video of the same name here on tumblr. I must warn you that just reading the script will probably not give you the full experience, so I would encourage you to watch the video (linked above).

There might also still be a lot of grammatical errors in the text, because I don’t proofread.

Intro

LAST TIME ON LUCEM FERTO

Okay, so! I don’t want this to turn into a reaction channel OR a Dream SMP channel for that matter! [echo]

Well, I lied.

[Intro to “Luc is pretentious about the funny blockmen. Episode 2”]

I swear, I’m working on other stuff. It’s just that my dumb lizard brain has only capacity for one interest at a time!

So, something you might not know about me, is that I am on tumblr – who am I kidding, most of you will know me from tumblr. Before starting this whole YouTube thing, I thought that website died years ago – but as per usual reality proves me wrong. I’m also on Twitter and Reddit, but I get the most engagement on tumblr – by far! – and I need those sweet, sweet numbers for the serotonin!

Anyways, one of my favourite past-times on tumblr is to razz Philza Hardcore Minecraft – that’s his full name – for being a frankly awful father [clicking away] – wait, wait, no! Philza fans, this isn’t a hit piece on him, I promise! Please come back!

This is video is meant to be a companion piece to my previous video about Technoblade and the Doomsday event – you can tell by the shared nomenclature – so you should probably watch that one before you proceed. Unless you don’t want to, which is also perfectly understandable.

DISCLAIMER: This video is mostly about the character Philza plays on the Dream SMP. Whenever I talk about the content creator Philza, I will say so properly. Also, Spoiler Warning for Dream SMP Season 2.

… What is that? You’re wondering what the Dream SMP is? Well, if you had just watched the other video like I told you to do, you would know, because I explained it pretty well there. But in case you don’t know, here’s the cliff notes.

Dream SMP is the hottest New Media Series on Twitch right now! It has it all: gaslighting, child soldiers, Machiavellian political intrigue, Hamilton roleplay, desecration of the dead, shounen protagonists, SO! MUCH! AMNESIA! Filicide, furries, a red egg that’s definitely homophobic and teenagers inventing nuclear warfare. And it’s all done in Minecraft – yes, the funny block game where the only way to emote is to crouch.

And you say the perfect brief doesn’t exist!

Now, you might be wondering, why do I want to talk about this? Well, it’s because Content Creator Philza is one of least controversial internet personalities that I can think of. That man exudes pure comfort. So, it’s just very, very amusing to me that his character became one of the most controversial figures on the SMP, only outshone by Tommy and Technoblade.

And it’s not just amusing, it’s also extremely interesting! I want to dig deep to uncover and discuss the dynamics behind why that is. How did it come to this point? How did a man who appears genuinely so pleasant create a character that inspires so much discourse!

Now, if you watched that Technoblade video – like I told you to twice now! – you might know, that I am the resident character analyses hater of fandom! And that impression is false and slanderous! Don’t tell other people that I hate character analyses! I love them!

It’s just that, in the Dream SMP in particular, there is an abundance of character analyses! Every streamer has at least two very good essays written about them, exploring every possible angle to view their characters and backgrounds and everything. All I’m saying is: I don’t have anything to add on that front.

So, instead I want to pursue a different approach – something, that I feel is a bit underrepresented in the fandom! And I’m not just talking narrative analysis – that’s right, this episode we’re going even more pretentious! – I’m talking Transtextual Analysis!

Now, what is Transtextuality? Well, unfortunately it has very little to do with actual Trans people – #transrights, just in case that wasn’t obvious – but instead describes a mode of analysis with which to put – to quote French literary theorist Gérard Genette – “the text in a relationship, whether obvious or concealed, with other texts”.

Basically, you know how the L’Manburg War of Independence heavily quotes and borrows from the hit musical Hamilton? That’s transtextuality! A lot of the analyses surrounding how Tommy mirrors the Greek hero Theseus, who was invoked by Technoblade multiple times in the series, are already doing transtextual analysis! So, it’s really not something that’s new to the Dream SMP fandom.

But how does this apply to Philza and how he is looked at and judged by his parental skills? Well, there are multiple forms of transtextuality, two of which we will discuss today.

But before we continue, I gotta do that annoying YouTuber thing. I know these videos don’t look like much, but I spend a really long time making them. I work fulltime and I try my best to keep up, but sometimes I can’t. So please, like, subscribe, comment to give me some algorithm juice – I really need it – and most importantly share it! Share it with your friends, share it with your family – I’m sure Grandma is very interested in what I have to say about Philza Minecraft.

And I’m trying to be better! If I sound at all different for this video, it’s because I finally bought a new pop filter, so I can hit my plosives without it sounding like there’s a thunderstorm in my room. I hope it makes a difference; it was a very cheap pop filter, so maybe it doesn’t. Maybe it sounds worse – that would be bad!

What was I talking about? Oh yeah, CHILD NEGLEGT!

 Intertextuality: Why is Dadza?

You know what’s really interesting about the Dream SMP – aside from, you know, most things about it? Very few of the characters have concrete, fleshed-out backstories – and that’s pretty weird! In no other medium or genre could you get away with something like that – at least for long-form storytelling!

So, how does Dream SMP get away with this? Well, it’s because every character on the Dream SMP is basically a self-insert – and I don’t mean that in the “This character is based on me”-kinda way, but in the “This character, for all intents and purposes, is me!”-way. This, like many things that are fascinating about the Dream SMP, is owed to the fact that this series didn’t start off as a continuous drama – it started off as a Let’s Play.

And while we can talk about how someone’s on-camera/on-mic persona is in some ways a character, it’s still miles off of being an actual, fully-realized, separate character in a storyline.

This is where Intertextuality comes in.

Intertextuality is a subset of Transtextuality. It describes how the hypertext, which is the text, you’re currently engaged with, uses another text, the hypotext, to supplement itself. The interconnection the hypertext establishes with the hypotext, through stuff like allusion for example, uh-hum [Hamilton], can colour how an audience interprets the hypertext. Basically, Hamilton and Theseus are the hypotexts; the Dream SMP is the hypertext.

So, what does this have to do with backstory? Simple: The backstories of the characters in the Dream SMP consist basically of nothing but intertextual references. Through intertextuality their content effectively substitutes their character’s backstory.

You can see it everywhere. Wilbur’s and Schlatt’s relationship and rivalry is hugely enriched, if you are aware of their shared history like SMPLive, for example – I think anyway. I haven’t watched SMPLive, because … there’s only so many hours in the day and I cannot keep up with the Dream SMP and catch up on SMPLive and live a healthy life – which I already don’t do, so…

BadBoyHalo’s and Skeppy’s relationship, which has become the crux of the Crimson-Storyline of Seasons 2 and 3, is hugely supplemented if you know that they’re also very close as streamers and in real life.

Another great example of intertextuality is basically Technoblade’s entire deal. If you just look at him completely within the text of the Dream SMP and try to transplant his entrance to any other medium: It would be extremely weird! Like, he’s just this guy that comes in in the middle of a very climatic arc, no build-up, no explanation what his deal is, and he’s treated like he has always been there. In any other medium that just wouldn’t work – at least not without a flashback or some sort of exposition!

But because of stuff like Minecraft Mondays, the Potato Wars, his Duel against Dream and SMPEarth, we understand that he is a Big Deal!

Anyways, to bring all of this back to Philza Minecraft: What kind of hypotext informs how the audience sees his character? Well, this is where I will have to talk about SBI.

SBI is an acronym that stand for State Bank of India, the 43rd largest bank in the world and…

It also stands for Sleepy Bois Incorporated. Sleepy Bois Incorporated is a loose assembly of content creators, consisting of Philza, Wilbur Soot, TommyInnit and Technoblade. It is most well-known for its very endearing family dynamic – a dynamic that is frequently acknowledged and played up by the creators involved. Tommy is the youngest brother, Wilbur and Techno are the two older brothers and Philza is of course the dad. And when I say, it’s played up, I really mean it! Wilbur seems to be especially enamoured with the idea and leaves no opportunity untaken to bring it up – which we will come back to.

And I’m not saying that they’re faking this and this is somehow an act. While I know none of these people personally, it appears to me, that this is genuinely how they interact – if a little exaggerated for the streaming experience. Even when they’re not consciously playing into the family dynamic, their interactions still very much lend themselves to that interpretation by the viewers.

Philza especially just radiates Dad-Friend energy – so much so that it has become a huge part of his brand identity – yay, I can bring that back (check out my Christmas video if you want to hear me ramble about that). The nickname Dadza stuck even before SBI was a thing.

So, even if we completely disregard SBI – which we shouldn’t for reasons I’ll get back to – Philza has cultivated an image of strong paternal guidance. He is, in my opinion completely deservedly, regarded very positively. He is highly respected and in turn seen as a voice of reason.

All of this would eventually inform the hypotext of the character Philza within Dream SMP.

 Interlude: Before Dadza & November 16th

Okay, so now we have established that a) Dream SMP heavily hinges on intertextual readings by the audience to supplement character backstory and b) that Philza’s entire deal is that he’s the dad-friend – more specifically that he’s the dad of SBI (not the bank). I think you know where this is going.

So, yeah, ever since it was on the table that Philza could join the Dream SMP, it was immediately assumed that he would take on the paternal guardian role all these traumatized people on that server so desperately needed – and with good reason! Like I said before, the audience at this point was trained to take intertextual interpretations as basically canon or at the very least canon-adjacent.

I want to emphasize that this is most likely not done deliberately. I’m sure content creators Wilbur and Philza didn’t sit there and said: “Yes! We will rely entirely on the audience’s inclination to interpret our characters intertextually to define character Philza!”. Like, obviously that did not happen.

But it’s also important to remember that unlike with traditional media and the fanbases cultivated there, the separation between the Dream SMP and its audience is almost non-existent – and purposely so. The story events are streamed live, Chats are acknowledged in canon and even outside of livestreams creators are extremely involved with the fandom. So, the weight of fan-expectations is equally amplified and will more likely be incorporated into the writing process. Case in point:

[Wilbur “I miss Philza”/Philza about Wilbur]

During Wilbur’s villain arc, even before his official involvement, Philza became a prevalent point of discussion. The hope that he would be the one to snap Wilbur out of his downward spiral was not only wish-fulfilment on behalf of the fans; it also very much played off of the intertextual reading of the SBI-dynamic in relation to the Dream SMP.

Of course, this still doesn’t make Philza and Wilbur canonically blood-related – but it definitely used the “paternal”-dynamic of SBI to build-up tension and drama.

And that ultimately brings us to November 16th. The Grand Finale of Season 1 and Philza’s first canonical appearance on the SMP.

Now, for this I want to pull back from the transtextual analysis and talk about simply narrative analysis: What is Philza’s narrative purpose on November 16th?

Philza serves as the last threshold on Wilbur’s Villain’s Journey – to appropriate Vogler’s version of the monomyth for a minute here – he is what Vogler calls the “Threshold Guardian”. He is the last enemy the Hero faces before completing his quest – in this particular case Wilbur’s quest is to blow up L’Manberg. Multiple people have at this point tried to dissuade him from this course of action: Tommy, Quackity, Niki and others. So how come this Philza moment is not redundant in terms of dynamics compared to these prior scenes?

Well, it’s through our intertextual understanding of Wilbur’s and Phil’s relationship. Because Philza does not just occupy the role of the Threshold Guardian – he is also implicitly the Mentor. Before Phil there was no character in the storyline that held a higher position of moral authority than Wilbur – Dream and Schlatt, while at points more powerful in terms of actual authority, were never positioned by the narrative as Wilbur’s superiors in the same way as Wilbur was to Tommy, Tubbo or even Niki.

Before November 16th all challenges Wilbur faced were from people narratively subordinated to him. But that trend is broken with Phil. That is why he is the Threshold Guardian, why this confrontation is at the climax of Wilbur’s arc. Because Phil is the last thing tethering Wilbur to whatever morality he held before his villain arc; Phil is the last, moral obstacle Wilbur has to discard before gaining his reward.

And, just a quick sidenote, because I’ve seen it around the fandom a bunch: When I’m referring to Wilbur denouncing his morality, I’m using that in terms of narrative analysis. I’m mentioning it, because Wilbur’s character can very easily be read as mentally ill or neurodivergent and some people have – rightly! – pointed out that the excessive vilifying when talking about his character is … problematic, to say the least.

So, I just want to make clear, this isn’t a character analysis, I’m being purposely broad when talking about Wilbur and Phil.

In the end, Wilbur takes that final step and gets his “reward”: As his final request his mentor takes his life and vanquishes the evil – the dragon of Wilbur’s story slays the dragon of L’Manburg. It’s very Shakespearean in its tragedy – but beyond the larger theatrics it’s not really used to further characterize Phil – at least in the context of Season 1. There’s not a lot of focus on his characters internal conflict during November 16th.

Phil, like Techno, is very utilitarian in how content creator Wilbur writes him: He serves as a moment of hype; an obstacle Wilbur has to face; a participant in the tragic climax of Wilbur’s character and ultimately takes on his implicit and expected role of mentor and guiding figure to the rest of L’Manburg.

I think not a lot of people talk about how Philza does not join Technoblade during November 16th. He takes the side of L’Manburg – he fights against the withers and he joins Tommy, Tubbo and the others at the L’Mantree, thus framing him as loyal to the L’Manburg administration – even though Season 2 would make his loyalty to Techno central to his character. But more on that later.

What’s also important about November 16th is that this is the day when the general intertextual interpretation became canonized text.

[You’re my son!]

Wilbur is made Phil’s canonical, biological son. The intertextual interpretation of SBI as it pertains to these two characters on the SMP was completely reinforced by the narrative. Or to put it in Fandom terms: The headcanon became actual canon. At least when it came to Wilbur … but what about Philza’s “other” children?

Well, that leads to our second form of transtextual analysis:

 Paratextuality: Is Dadza?

These titles are just getting better and better.

The Paratext is defined as all those things in a published work that accompany the text. It comes in two forms: One of them is the Peritext, which are non-diegetic elements directly surrounding the text – like chapter titles, author’s notes, and stuff like that. Translated to the medium of the Dream SMP, it would be stuff like this:

[Examples]

And, trust me, I could make a whole separate video about how people on the SMP use their peritext as a tool for storytelling – I’m looking at you, Ranboo – but that’s not what we will talk about in the context of Dadza.

Instead, we will focus on the second form of Paratext, the Epitext, which consists of all authorial and editorial discussions taking place outside of the text. That’s stuff like interviews, private letters or J. K. Rowling’s Twitter Account – you know, before she decided to become a full-time asshole.

[Wilbur: Transrights]

After Season 1 ended, Wilbur indulged pretty heavily in providing epitext for the Dream SMP, something he had not done prior to November 16th. His paratextual additions ranged from the playful, like assigning DnD alignments to various SMP members, to the extremely impactful, like the whole three lives system!

You probably think, you know where this is going. Wilbur provided some epitext about how Tommy and Techno either are or are not biologically related to him … and I have to be honest I thought that too. But then I began looking into the impenetrable web that is the SBI-canon on the Dream SMP and found this!

[Ghostbur explains family]

So, it wasn’t paratext, it was just straight text. Said in character, in canon, without any implication that we the viewers should question this. The text of the SBI family dynamic was explicitly linked to Dream SMP-exclusive lore, namely Fundy being Wilbur’s and Sally the Salmon’s son. This is as clear as Philza’s anguished declaration on November 16th in establishing the intertext as text. And because Wilbur also had a very heavy hand in the discussion of paratext around that time, it gave his character’s words even more “canonical” weight. Metatextually speaking, this very much read like the author giving exposition through his character – exposition that we should understand as reliable.

And, by the way, before I continue, I need to give a huge, huge shoutout to kateis-cakeis on tumblr, I hope I pronounced that right, who was just so quick in providing me with these crucial clips. Without him I would have looked for days because these people don’t archive their shit! And the Dream SMP Wiki was NO help, by the way! I love what you guys do, but stuff like this belongs in the Trivia section on characters’ pages!

Anyways, basically during the entirety of early Season 2 the SBI family dynamic was basically canon to the SMP. Sometimes it was only alluded implicitly, again letting the intertext fill out the rest.

[Philza clips]

But just as often it was just explicitly talked about – both in the text and in the paratext.

[Fundy clip/Wilbur “Twins” clip/Tommy clip]

So, I know what you’re thinking: “Why is this part called paratext, if the entire family tree is just textual”. Well, that last clip might give you a hint, as to what I will talk about. Notice how Tommy, one of the people most directly impacted by the canonization of SBI lore, is both unaware of and seems generally unenthused about it, to put it nicely? Well, that would soon turn out to be a much bigger deal than anyone could have imagined as he wasn’t the only one.

[Technoblade decanonizes SBI]

Yeah …

This happened on 20th of December. Regular viewers of this channel will remember that I put out a 90-second joke video, where I complain about this very development. And while I was mostly kidding around, the core idea is still true. The paratext provided by Technoblade and established text were in direct contradiction with one another – and that brought a lot of confusion into the fandom. Confusion, that would soon be followed by frustration.

Because Techno only decanonized himself as part of the SBI family dynamic – but what about Tommy and Tubbo, the latter of which was incorporated into the dynamic exclusively within the lore of the Dream SMP. Was this still canon or wasn’t it?

What followed was a muddled mess of contradictions, intertextual implications, text and paratext in conflict with each another. It was for the most part inscrutable to figure out how Tommy and Philza related to one another. I’ll spare you every comment made about this – mostly because I want to spare myself from looking for all of them.

In the end, the current status is that their familial relationship is … unclear. Philza said, again in paratext, that it’s ultimately up to the writers to decide, whether or not Tommy is his son … which, I personally think he and Tommy should be the ones to establish that, but I’ll come back to that later.

But why is all of this important anyway? Why would this ambiguity create such an uproar, such controversy – especially when it comes to Tommy’s character? What makes Tommy’s and Philza’s relationship such a target for discussion in the fandom?

Well … this is where we will have to talk about the storyline of Season 2.

Interlude II: Tommy’s Exile and Dadza in Season 2

Okay, Season 2. This is where the spoilers are, so I will just sneakily drop this again. It took me five seconds to google this gif and I will milk it for every penny it’s worth!

At the beginning of Season 2, Philza’s narrative role has not changed much from where Season 1 ended. He is in L’Manburg dispensing earthly wisdom, being a paternal figure to Fundy, Ghostbur and Tubbo, helping with the nation’s rebuilding efforts; just generally occupying the role of the mentor.

[clips]

And then came … the Exile. The Exile Arc took place between December 3rd and December 15th during Season 2 of the Dream SMP. It revolves around TommyInnit getting exiled from L’Manburg and slowly getting psychologically tortured and broken down by Dream. It’s a really great arc, at least in my opinion, that explores and deepens a lot of Tommy’s character relationships, whether that be Tommy and Dream, Tommy and Tubbo or Tommy and Ranboo. One relationship, however, is noticeably missing.

So, yeah, Philza spends basically the entirety of the exile doing pretty much nothing of consequence. And that’s not a problem specific to him – One big criticism I would levy against the Exile Arc is that a lot of characters are left spinning their wheels. Which is why we get zany stuff like El Rapids, Drywaters, Eret’s Knights of the Roundtable, Boomerville – anyone remember Boomerville, that was a thing for 5 seconds, wasn’t it? – basically a lot of storylines are started and then unceremoniously dropped. Now, I will talk more about this, when I make a video about Season 2 of the Dream SMP … in ten years, look forward to it.

In the case of Philza, this inaction was especially damning, because at this point it was still a considered canon that he was Tommy’s dad. So, the fans were left with a situation, where just a few weeks prior Philza was occupying a paternal role for Fundy and Ghostbur … but now, that his youngest son was in a very concerning predicament – to put it lightly – he was nowhere to be found.

So why is that?

Well, the most obvious answer is that Dream and Tommy didn’t write him into the storyline. We’ve seen that Tommy wasn’t particularly interested in exploring a familial relationship to Philza, at least at the time. And it would just not fit in with what Dream and Tommy tried to do with the Exile Arc: they wanted to tell the story of Tommy being isolated, completely under Dream’s mercy, slowly worn down and manipulated. If Philza had been constant presence for Tommy during that time, it would have definitely shifted the narrative focus. That doesn’t mean that they couldn’t have done that, it’s just a matter of fact that they didn’t.

This also reveals another truth about content creator Philza’s character work, that I think is extremely crucial: He takes what the writers give him. Outside of a few choice moments, he doesn’t seem particularly interested in expanding or even solidifying his character on the SMP.

What I’m saying is that he is very go-with-the-flow: Wilbur wants to enact a Shakespearean tragedy? Philza’s up for it. Fundy wants him as a parental figure and mentor? Philza’s here for him. Tommy, conversely, doesn’t want him as a paternal presence, even though it would make sense for Philza’s character, as it was established so far, to be there? Philza will oblige.

The reason I’m mentioning this is because, while Tommy and Dream were unwilling to utilise Philza in their storyline, someone else was more than happy to. Which leads us back, like it always does, to everyone’s favourite Porky Pig-kinnie in a crown: Technoblade.

Technoblade and Philza, from everything I’ve seen of them, seem to be very good friends – and they share a lot of history even outside SBI. So, it’s commendable that they would collaborate on a storyline together.

A consequence of that, however, is that Philza’s narrative purpose shifts completely with very little transition. His entire character changes from being the Mentor-figure of L’Manberg to being pretty much exclusively defined as Technoblade’s ally; his man on the inside. It is a very sharp turn from the end of Season 1. Their relationship is once again informed via intertext – this time the Antarctic Empire on SMPEarth serves as the hypotext – but there isn’t a huge effort made to smoothly integrate that aspect of Philza’s character into the larger narrative framing around him.

How much the narrative utilisation of Philza has shifted can be very easily observed through the Butcher Army event on December 16th, a story event that I like less and less the more I think about. Here Philza is used to show just how corrupt and violent Tubbo’s administration has becomes. He is no longer the respected mentor, he is now the stand-in for the oppressed populace, similar to Niki’s role in Season 1. On a narrative level, he is here to prove a point.

If you’ve seen my Technoblade video, you know how I feel about … just that entire storyline, so I will not reiterate too much on it. I just want to make clear that I’m not principally against this development – if they wanted to truly explore Tubbo going down a dark path and getting corrupted by power, so much so that he would even treat the person who effectively raised him like a prisoner, I would be extremely here for it, I cannot stress that enough.

The problem I have is that it’s just so sloppily done. It is not coherent with how these characters behaved and, more importantly, how they were narratively framed prior to the Butcher Army event. Fundy gets one token line about Phil being his Grandfather – a far cry from the very emotionally complex relationship they had established at the beginning of Season 2 – and Phil then callously disowns him.

The major problem simply is that we don’t see how Philza changes from Mentor-figure to embittered, oppressed citizen. And there was enough time to build to that. During the entirety of Tommy’s exile Tubbo was pretty much spinning his wheels and Quackity and Fundy were opening up plot cul-de-sacs that didn’t end up going anywhere. This is time they could have spent on developing their relationship to Philza and the dark path they were going down – but again, Season 2 video.

There is not much to say on Philza’s narrative purpose and framing beyond the Butcher Army event. He remains pretty much exclusively Techno’s consigliere with his role as Mentor to L’Manburg a distant memory. He has some cute character moments with Ranboo, because content creator Philza is just big dad-energy whether he wants to or not, and whenever he and Ghostbur share a scene suddenly the narrative remembers that there are people other than Technoblade that should exist in Philza’s inner world. But aside from that, Philza’s storyline in Season 2 remains … pretty definitive is the nicest way I can put it.

Most importantly his relationship with Tommy continues to be completely unexplored – whether by chance or choice – and that combined with ever vaguer paratext leaves “Dadza” in a very peculiar situation.

 Conclusion: Is Dadza a Good Dadza?

So, the question to end all questions. The big, obnoxious text, that I will probably have put in the thumbnail – I haven’t made it yet, but I know myself. The honest answer is: I couldn’t tell you.

I have, in the past, been expounding the virtues of narrative analysis. That is because I feel that Narrative Analysis and Textual Analysis, like in this video, can provide certain tools that Character Analysis lacks. Often times I see people trying to get at a writing problem or query and getting frustrated because they’re not using the toolset, they need to figure out what they want to figure out.

But I’d be a hypocrite if I pretended like everything could be solved through the modes of analysis I prefer. And I think the Dadza-issue is exactly such a case.

I set out to explore why the Philza-Tommy-“Dadza”-relationship has become so controversial. It’s a combination of expectations build up through intertextual readings, that were partly canonized – something that is very common for the Dream SMP – conflicting pieces of paratext, which only serve to muddle the issue further and a text that is not only completely uninterested in actually exploring Tommy’s and Philza’s relationship – as it stands right now they might as well be strangers, narratively speaking – but also completely changes Philza’s narrative purpose as it relates to characters like Fundy or Tubbo about half-way through with little to no transition.

That is why I say, that Philza’s character is a victim of narrative circumstance. Because unwittingly, through all of these factors and decisions, there is not coherent reading of Philza that frames his parental skills in a particularly kind light.

The question of how we can judge Phil as a paternal figure ultimately falls within the purview of the character analysis – and that’s a very multifaceted issue, highly dependent on which POV you focus on and how you interpret the other characters in that POV’s periphery.

To put my cards on the table, I think that Philza is a very flawed father/father-figure – and I find that absolutely okay. Flaws are the spice of character building. He is not Cinderella’s Evil Stepmother – but he’s also definitely not Mufasa. If we were to read Philza as a paternal figure, then he would have made a lot of mistakes and decisions to the detriment of his “children” – least of all everything that happened on Doomsday.

But I also have sympathies for Philza fans who are tired of the Dad-Debate and would like to have his character judged independent from his relationship to Ghostbur, Fundy, Tubbo and Tommy.

Ultimately, to bring it all to a point, I’d like to end with saying, that I think that Philza, out of all the characters on the SMP, has the potential to be on of the most intriguing, multifaceted ones. There are all of these different patches of story, character moments and narrative and transtextual implications, that, if brought together, could create a beautiful tapestry of the character Philza.

You have his relationship with Techno, which holds the potential for so much emotional conflict and vulnerabilities, you have his time as mentor of L’Manburg, which is just criminally underused; the complex relationship between him and Ghostbur/Wilbur; and – for me, personally – most intriguingly this weird, almost uncomfortably distant non-relationship with Tommy. That last one is intriguing to me, because it contrasts just so much with our intertextual understanding of the characters and streaming personas – and it just holds the potential for so much conflict, so much drama, so much angst. Which I live for!

And, yes, I do believe that most of this is narrative happenstance, that this was largely not intended by Philza or really any of the writers. It’s just what happens when hybrid-roleplay-improv a long-running, livestreamed storyline in Minecraft.

But I want them to realize the potential they have on their hands, because it could – with barely any adjustments – turn Philza from a victim of narrative circumstance to a champion of it!

 Outro

Thank you so much for watching this video. Usually, I don’t record outros this standard, but after this beast of a video I felt it necessary. I hope that whether you’re a Philza fan or a Philza critical or just completely uninvolved in the whole thing, there is at least a little entertainment you could get from this.

I want to take this opportunity to say that my next few videos will probably not be Dream SMP related – a sentence which undoubtedly lost me a bunch of subs – simply because I don’t want to burn out on it. I genuinely enjoy watching the SMP and being exhausted by it would be something I wouldn’t want to force on myself.

But who knows what will happen? The Karl Jacobs video was something I did spur of the moment because the idea just came to me – so I can’t guarantee that the next video won’t be a three-minute joke about Purpled or whatever.

Anyway, my concrete plans for future Dream SMP videos are essays on Season 1 and Season 2 as well as one for Tales from the SMP.

Before that I have a longer video in the works, which I’ve already teased a bunch, so I hope it will finally be finished sometime. And I also may be working on something … eboys-related? Maybe. I’m not making any promises!

[ziamhaze]

My Future in Fic

Yeah, so, the 100k fic that I’ve been working on for the past six months?  The one that was going to be uploaded to AO3 last week?  Yeah, it’s accidentally getting published...

Where do I start?

I suppose with a massive thank you to anyone who’s clicked on any of my fics over these past two years.  I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again.  I never ever thought about writing as a career.  I’ve never written anything prior to my Harry Potter AU Compartment 451.  I didn’t even take an English class in undergrad or grad school.  I genuinely just had an idea for a fic I wanted to read and since no one had written it, I had to do so myself.  Since then, I’ve written every single day for 2 years.  I left my job in the entertainment industry, got accepted to one of the best creative writing programs in the world on a scholarship, and now one of my stories is being considered at Harper Collins.  Yes, the Harper Collins.  It’s the longest shot in the world, but for legal reasons I was not allowed to upload the fic version on any website prior to submission.  Even if they don’t pick it up, I’ve been advised to continue to shop it around to agents.

What I can do, however, is share the premise.

If you’ve been following my tumblr and watching my tags - I SEE YOU ALL OUT THERE - then you’ll know that this fic was meant to have Zayn with his signature undercut hairstyle and one more little thing...

Someone sent me an ask a while back about what this fic was supposed to be about.  I believe I said something about it being an adaptation fic, but not from a film/tv show/other piece of literature, from a song.  This next fic was meant to be an adaptation of the song Younger by Ruel.  Later on, it also took shape with the help of Remember by Liam and a few others that you can find here.

The miniature summary is as follows:

When his father suddenly passes, twenty-nine-year-old Liam Payne is brought back to the Sydney suburbs where he grew up.  He doesn’t plan on seeing his childhood best friend, Zayn Malik, at the burial service.  They haven’t spoken since going from brothers to strangers one fateful day fifteen years prior.  But Zayn puts an end to this when he approaches Liam after the burial, offering his condolences and asking if Liam can help his archaeological research team with photographing their newest project.  The unexpected closeness forces each man to wade through uneasy emotions.  For Liam, a mixture of grief, lost identity, and confusion over why he’s willing to interact with the one person he swore he’d never forgive.  And for Zayn, a tidal wave of anxiety that comes from finally facing a part of himself he’s always chosen to deny.  When We Were Younger is a story heavily rooted in blurred identities and exploring what loss can look like in two different scenarios: death and friendship.

For obvious reasons, their names will be changed.  Liam, to Hutton.  Zayn, to Cairo (his ethnicity will also be changed to Egyptian).  As you can see, it was meant to be my big ‘enemies to lovers’ fic.  Technically, it’s ‘best friends to enemies to lovers’, but you know.

Right, so what does this mean for me going forward?

I still have so much inspiration when it comes to writing Zayn and Liam as characters.  I don’t plan on putting a complete stop to writing them, but with my career taking this large of a turn, I do have to prioritise my time.  That said, as of now, I can’t afford to write long-form fic any longer.

Soon, I’ll be starting a PhD program where I’ll be writing another full-length novel for mass publication.  For fun, here’s a little insight on the two ideas that I’ll be pitching:

1.  Underground boxer (loosely based off Liam) falls in love with arms gang leader (loosely based off Zayn).  Throughout their love story, the latter has to outrun the psychological trauma his father (the leader of Zayn’s rival gang) still throws his way. 

2.  Cold War AU.  Paris, circa 1950/51.  Ambassador’s son (loosely based off Liam) befriends new student (loosely based off Zayn) at the international school.  Paris is a ticking time bomb; war is about to break out at literally any second.  The two clearly have feelings for each other, but can’t act on them because homosexuality in the 1950s...yikes.  When war does break out, the two are separated, and as Liam’s character goes out to find Zayn’s, he learns a secret of his that changes everything.

Whichever I don’t write for the PhD will be the novel I write following it.

In the meantime, I’m going to continue to write (and edit) like crazy.  Ever since I randomly wrote C451, there hasn't been a day that’s gone by where I haven't written something.  It may have only been a paragraph or two, but never zero.  This is how you get better.  This is the equivalent of going out and shooting free throws for 30 minutes a day.  You have to put in the work in order to get better.  I'm very lucky that I'm incredibly self-disciplined and I've been able to crank out as many stories as I have over the past 2 years.

That said, I’ll be writing shorter little oneshots.  I have several ideas that I’ve been sitting on, but haven’t ever thought to write because I HATE writing short stories.  Little ideas that don't have huge plotline/climax potential, but that I want to just see on paper, I'll probably end up writing.  If I had to guess, I'd say they'll come out to around 10-15k.  Also, sequels?  Prequels?  Haha, you never know...

I’ve also got a series called “Sleep Drabbles” that are, yes, you guessed it, a series of drabbles based around one theme: sleep.  I also have a few scenes that I want to write which are based on ziam’s kids, not actually ziam themselves.  If there’s enough demand for that, I can upload those too, but they’re quite niche, so I don’t think the general fandom would be very interested.

As far as frequency for all of this, I have no idea.  I’ve always done things at my own pace and written stories that I want to write, for myself.  That won’t ever change, so I don’t want to commit to one drabble a week or one short-length fic per month.  It takes me weeks (months for this last fic) to research and interview the necessary people to get character arcs correct/believable.  I love that part of writing, and so if I have a little story that I want to write that may only be 10k but takes me ages to put together how I want, then so be it.  I will always be around to answer asks/messages and please, continue to tag me in your writing tag posts!  But please, no prompts.

So, that’s my future with fic.

Again, I cannot say thank you enough to every single one of you.  Every single thing that people tag me in (@malik-payne , @zqua1d , @zentiment , @liamisthesun , @redyellowberry I’m looking at you), I appreciate and love!  The recommendation lists that people have put me on, THANK YOU!  It’s wild to think that I used to look to rec lists for years and now I’m on them.  @ziamfanfiction THANK YOU for always having my back with exposure!  @paynefulperiods , my beloved beta reader, THANK YOU for always encouraging me and putting up with shit first drafts.  @march-z5 , THANK YOU for always being on call for ideas and listening to me bang my head against the wall at 4 am.

Now, might fuck around and make a fake picspam for the fic that never was...

Also, all of the behind scenes pages for each of my fics are now public, so feel free to check those out here.

I want to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for making this journey possible. I know people say that a lot when they gain a following of any sort, but I truly truly mean it.  You have to have talent in order to be an author, but you also have to have people who want to read your stuff.  Proof of concept is a real thing.

So thank you a million times over.

Speak soon my friends.

[buckybeardreams]

Unwanted

Chapters: 11/11

Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark

Characters: Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Sam Wilson (Marvel), Brock Rumlow, James "Bucky" Barnes, Clint Barton, Harley Keener

Additional Tags: Non-Traditional Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Alpha Steve Rogers, Omega Tony Stark, Service Top, Dominant Bottom, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Virgin Steve Rogers, Brock Rumlow is a Good Bro, Sam Wilson Is a Good Bro, Romantic Soulmates, First Meetings, Angst with a Happy Ending, Sappy, Romantic Fluff, Awkwardness, Drinking to Cope, Self-Worth Issues, Insecure Tony Stark, Insecure Steve Rogers, Age Difference, Harley Keener is Tony Stark's Biological Child, Bonding, Claiming Bites, Claiming, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mpreg, Non-Explicit Sex, Light Dom/sub, Mutual Masturbation, Coming Untouched, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Wordcount: 10.000-30.000, Knotting

Series: Part 1 of Second Chances

Summary:

Steve is a soft Alpha and Tony is an in charge kind of Omega with no desire to find a mate. He doesn't want to find his soulmate and when he does meet Steve he's determined to stay away from him. 

That is until he realizes just how right they are for each other.

Ch 1 Ch 2 Ch 3 Ch 4 Ch 5 Ch 6 Ch 7 Ch 8 Ch 9 Ch 10 Ch 11

Part 2 is now out and the first chapter can be read on tumblr or ao3.

Words: 1,406

"I can't believe we were both right." Tony shook his head. 

The baby was a boy with a light dusting of blond hair on his head and startling blue eyes that stared up at them all sparkling and full of wonder as he took in all of the new sights around him. 

"He's beautiful," Steve murmured. 

Tony hummed in agreement, pulling the baby closer to sniff his head and take in that baby scent that seems to cling to all young pups. They were still just staring at their baby in awe when he started to cry and Tony's nipples started to leak, wet spots forming on his shirt. 

"I think I'm gonna have to walk around shirtless for the next few years," Tony said with a sigh. 

Steve glanced at him in surprise as Tony passed the baby off to Steve and stripped off his shirt. 

"I have no complaints there, but you do realize he's only gonna stay a baby for like one maybe two years max." 

Tony gave him a look. 

"Don't question my parenting methods, Alpha. You're not the one who carried this thing in them for nine months and you didn't have to deal with him jumping on your bladder either. So I get to make all the decisions when it comes to how we're gonna raise him." 

"Yeah, but I'm gonna be the one staying home with him." 

"I know and I'm very grateful, but if you have any questions you can just call me." 

Steve nodded, because there was nothing else to say about it. If Tony said this was the way it was going to be, then this was the way it was going to be. 

"I'm gonna get hard if you keep bossing me around." 

"Good, we can get started on trying for the next one," Tony teased, taking the crying baby back and coaxing him to latch onto his nipple. 

Steve's eyes widened and he looked scared at the thought. 

"Another one? Already?" Steve squeaked. 

Tony just giggled. 

"I'm just kidding, Alpha. We'll wait until I stop breastfeeding this little guy and then we can try for another one. Until then, I'm going on the pill." 

Steve nodded. 

"Cool. That's, um, cool," Steve said awkwardly. "It's not like I'm against having another one. It's just- I'm still not sure what we're gonna do with this one." 

Tony smiled softly and kissed his cheek, still cradling Harley to his chest while he suckled at his nipple. 

"You're gonna be a great daddy, Steve," Tony promised.

Steve grinned at him and leaned down to kiss him. 

"And don't worry about not knowing what you're doing. I'm an Omega so I have the instincts for these kinds of things." 

"Yeah, but I'm not an Omega." 

"I know that, but you didn't know what you were doing when we first started fucking, but I taught you how to please me and I'll teach you how to do this too." 

Steve blushed bright red. 

"You said I did good!" Steve squeaked. 

"You did. You were eager to please and what you lacked in skill you made up for by being cute." 

"What I lacked?" Steve said, his ego clearly bruised. 

Tony rolled his eyes. 

"Yes, Steve. You were a virgin and the way we play goes against most all of your instincts, so it took some time for you to learn. There's nothing wrong with that. I'm a very experienced teacher and you learned quickly how to get me off, so no harm done." 

"Tony!" Steve squeaked. 

"What? Don't worry about it. You're much better now." 

Steve just scoffed and shook his head. 

"Yeah, whatever," Steve grumbled. "I'm gonna go start dinner." 

Tony sighed as he walked away, but his attention quickly turned to Harley. 

"As soon as you can hold your head up, I'm gonna let your daddy take you for a ride on the bike that you were named after," Tony cooed at him. 

The baby didn't respond of course, still happily suckling at Tony's flat chest, but he did look up at his mom like he was aware of what Tony was talking about. Tony smiled softly at him and brushed a finger over his cheek. 

"You're gonna be the most spoiled, loved, happiest baby in the world Harley. I promise," Tony murmured.

*****

Steve was still pouting when they went to bed that night, Harley curled up in between them. Tony really didn't think he would be so hurt by the comment, since in many ways Steve didn't seem like an Alpha. Sure, he was protective and he had a knot, but for the most part he acted more like an Omega, at least when it was just the two of them. 

Tony wasn't stupid though. He knew he had upset him and he sighed when Steve kept peering at him through his lashes, a pout on his lips, looking away anytime Tony looked his way. 

"Steve," Tony groaned, scooping Harley up and gently laying him back down so he was now sleeping by the wall instead of in between them. 

They had pushed the bed up against the wall, because Tony had read that was the safest way to co-sleep. 

"Alpha. My pretty, pretty, Alpha. I love you so much, you know that right?" 

Steve didn't respond, he just bit his lip and fidgeted with the sheets. Tony groaned again and pushed him flat on his back, climbing on top of him. 

"Steve, look at me," Tony ordered, knowing that Steve wouldn't disobey him. 

He smirked when Steve's eyes snapped up to meet his instinctually. 

"There you go, pretty Alpha. Such a good boy you are, Alpha," Tony purred. "I'm sorry that I upset you, but you don't get to just pout about it. If there's something wrong you have to tell me. You don't get to keep things from me, Alpha, because you're mine. You understand?" 

Steve bit his lip, his eyes darting away from Tony's, but returning when Tony growled softly in that way that wasn't quite a growl but still managed to come off as a warning. 

"Yes, sir. I understand." 

"Good. You're so good for me, Alpha. I didn't mean to upset you and I shouldn't have teased you like that. It was mean. Can you forgive me?" 

Steve whimpered, pouting. 

"I'm still an Alpha, you know. I know that I'm not like other Alphas, but I still have pride, Tony." 

"Aw, I know you do and I like that you're not like other Alphas. I won't do it again, okay?" 

Steve chewed on his lip for a moment, considering something.

"Um, Tony?" 

"Hm?" 

"Do you think you could maybe do it again, but maybe while we're, you know, mating?" 

Tony raised his brow at him. 

"Really? You want me to humiliate you, Alpha?" 

Steve licked his lips nervously, nodding. His cheeks were bright red, but Tony could feel his dick hardening. 

"Maybe just a little?" 

Tony chuckled and kissed him. 

"Yeah, I could do that, but not now. Sam and Brock are watching Harley this Friday and I'll take you apart then, okay, baby?" 

Steve whined, his hips rocking up. 

"Please, sir." 

"Shh, not now," Tony murmured. "Don't wake the baby or I'll be punishing you on Friday." 

Steve whined again, but he wrapped his arms around Tony when he slipped off of him and pressed back until his ass was snug against the erection in Steve's sweats. Steve squirmed and Tony smirked, shifting slightly just to hear him whine again, the sound muffled as he ducked to hide his head in Tony's neck. 

"I love you, Alpha," Tony teased, his voice sugary sweet.

"I hate you," Steve mumbled into his neck and Tony wriggled his hips just to punish him. 

"Be good, Alpha, or I'll make you regret it." 

Steve sucked at his neck, his hips rutting forward at the threat. 

"I love you, Tony. My pretty Omega. I don't know how I got so lucky." 

"I don't know how you got so lucky either. I'm a catch," Tony teased. 

Steve rolled his eyes affectionately and kissed Tony's cheek. 

"You really are." 

Tony smiled softly, a light blush on his cheek. His eyes landed on their baby in his sleep sack, laying on top of their thin covers. He doesn't know how he got to be so lucky as to end up with a perfect mate and a perfect pup.

[smilingperformer]

Discussing the good and bad of Pokémon Journeys: Part “Goh”

Oh boi... this part is gonna be a doozy. Because I have a lot to talk about Goh, or as I tend to call him, Gou.

TLDR; I like Gou as a character but I very, very much have issues with the way he's currently written in the show. And that frustrates me deeply as I'd love to feel more positively about him. More under the cut, with Journeys abverted as JN.

Where do I even begin... Maybe by how I first became a fan of Gou's character, by after some time started to go back to neutral ground.

Like, ever since the very first episode, we've got a very clear picture of what kind of character Gou is: a bookworm, loves Pokémon, loves to show his knowledge and isn't exactly good at making friends. His only friend before Satoshi (and before learning about Tokio/Horace's reasonings for not showing up to their meeting place) was Chloe/Koharu, and we still don't know how the two met. Thou my guess is that their childhood friendship bonded over their parents meeting during some job or by Koharu feeling the need to be Gou's friend. Who knows, it's something I want to learn about. But that's besides the point, cough.

But like, from the very first episode on, it became clear that this show wants to focus on Gou, and telling his journey on becoming a Pokémon Trainer who wants to catch all of the Pokémon in the World, in order to get closer to catching Mew, the mythical Pokémon who's said to contain DNA of all existing Pokémon. He had a very strong introduction arc, with showing his dynamic with Koharu, having him meet Satoshi on top of Lugia, first getting to know Satoshi (and Rockets) and then catching his first partner Pokémon in Hibunny. However, as time went on and episodes started piling up, I started feeling like something about him was... off.

I feel like the first time I had an issue with the writing involving him was in JN006, where he went on his first catching spree. Where he kept catching Pokémon with ease. Small struggle at the start when trying to work together his dynamic with Hibunny, but the rest of the ep felt way too easy. Then again, Gou IS flat out Pokémon GO promotion. No one can deny that. His purpose is to promote GO's capture mechanic. It is the most successful Pokémon Mobile game of all time.

Anyway, the easy captures piled up on and on til JN010 when he finally had to use dozens of pokeballs to catch one. single. Dewgong. I loved this so much. It made me feel more at ease with his goal mechanic and I felt like I'd be fine with him from there on out. And I was. Til I started having new issues with him. All thanks to Satoshi's new goal in PWC finally having been established.

As time went on, it became clearer and clearer, that Gou was more focused on when it came to his goal progression, development in character level, and in what kind of quality his episodes would be.

Everyone knows how much I love JN032. Everyone does. It's one of my absolute fav episodes in the series. However, it also kinda is what first prompted me starting my worry that hasn't gone away since then: That Gou feels more like the protagonist than Satoshi does in this series, and not really an equal dual protag he was advertised to be.

Before the pitchforks are getting aimed at me, hear me out. I know, that based on some statistics, the focus is equal, with sliiiightly more inclinded towards Gou. However, that's where the issue is: Gou has, so far for me, had way better focus and way better episodes in this series, than Satoshi has, while also getting progress on his goal on other character's focus episodes. When Satoshi's episodes have been about PWC and training his Pokémon, Gou's had the kind of episodes that are more character exploring, developing him, evolving him in some way. And it, frustrates me. Because despite my better judgement, it gives me this feeling that Gou is stealing Satoshi's thunder, even when some type of statistics would suggest otherwise. It gives me this feeling that Gou is here to write Satoshi out. I do not like that I feel this way, I don't know how to get rid of this feeling and I hate it here.

Again, I like Gou's character, he's sweet, well developed, and I do enjoy seeing him in his own episodes. But I have come to noticed, than whenever he gets goal progression in an episode that's supposed to focus on Koharu or Satoshi, I feel so.... angry? And I've never, ever felt like this while watching other characters progress. And I know it's irrational.

Like, his main partner's already fully evolved, his secondary partner Sobble is already evolving soon despite only having one focus episode for itself before it, and he's caught all three of the Galar starters now, with some of his other not-that-important Pokémon making appearances every now and then with possible evolution showcases. And it's all done so fast. Same issue was with Satoshi's poketeam evolving in fast arcs, but I forgot to mention about it? But then again, I am somewhat fine with it as I get the writing style is to focus on one 'mon and then move on to another. Which is not to my taste completely but I digress. ANYWAY, back to Gou.

After seeing discussions and joining in on some on tumblr and twitter and elsewhere, it does appear that Gou's development speed and progression speed is incredibly fast. Like, seriously fast. He's caught a lot of Pokémon by now, and the show's already shown about 50% percent of all existing Pokémon in a bit over a year. About 30% being caught by Gou. (Statistics borrowed from EntityMays' Living Dex trackers, links in posts will disrupt showing in tag search so, google EntityMays's Living Dex, and you'll find the statistics there).

This is also very apparent when you think about how fast Gou suddenly became a good battler, when at the beginning he sucked. A lot. I get Satoshi could be a great example on learning how to battle with good strategy in mind, but we barely saw Gou struggle. We Satoshi struggle in OS, so I would have prefered more struggling by Gou. His first battle against a legendary ended up in Zapdos almost getting caught and uuuuuggh, while it's a pretty good episode it really should have been at later point, same with Suicune episode. Thou with the latter I have WAY more issues than just the placement but, I'm not gonna rant about that today.

And what should I say about his dynamics with other characters... They're good, I am a huge fan of how the dynamic between Koharu and Gou works, as their childhood friend dynamic is shown so, so well, and you can just tell the two have mutual respect as Gou gives Koharu the space she needed when she wasn't into Pokémon for a while, and when she then became partners with Eevee, Gou was so so SO darn supportive just, AGH. Love how these two work.

And everyone knows I fell for Gou x Tokio dynamic straight away. Like they had a friendship built up right away when they first met as little kids and Tokio missing out on their promised meeting due to being sick and not having any means of contacting him yes still considered Gou his friend after these years when Gou considered him a traitor of trust and Gou then forgives him for it and just aaaaaahhh-. KRHM. Excuse me.

Then there's Gou and Satoshi's dynamic and I already said in my post about Satoshi how I feel intimidated by the fans of their shipping and how it makes me feel.... kinda sad about not being able to like their dynamic for what it is. I LOVE it a ton. I have said it a countless times, they're a broTP to me. They're dynamic was very enjoyable for me to watch, and even Gou was. But like, on TOP of these issues I mentioned before this part, I also have another issue with Gou: his fanbase, or the crazier part of it.

Often times I feel like I'm unable to enjoy Gou's character without being reminded of the fans who constantly think of him as shipping fuel, or think he's flawless and anyone disagreering is in some form a negative trait filled human being, etc etc etc. In a way, I feel like I'd enjoy Gou and his dynamic with Satoshi way, way more, if I had never learned about this side of the fandom. Let people like their dynamic the way they want. Be it romantic or platonic. Neither is wrong, but pushing one side to push their own headcanon to other people's head is just, bad act. Having this feeling in me has actually made me wonder, whether I would have liked other characters I am such a huge fan of, if I had been watching their shows during their airing times (for example Serena).

Now what would I have done differently with Gou? Firstly, slow the fuck down. I would have prefered to see Hibunny way more. I would have prefered to have one Galar Starter, namely Grookey, go to Satoshi, as it would help me feel less like Gou's stealing his thunder. I would have prefered if Gou and Satoshi's goals were established around same time. I would have very much liked it, if Gou wouldn't be catching Pokémon each episode.

Now what COULD help me like him better from what we have by now? Well. Slow it down. Have him interact with Koharu more. Give him a rival to further make him shine on his own instead of seemingly relying on Satoshi to shine through. Hell, maybe make Tokio his friendly rival. And on top of that, please let him not catch Pokémon almost every single episode. I'd love an episode where he captures some Pokémon that prefers to be free, and he then would let it go. I think that would make his character be good on his own, and make me feel better about him once again.

Cough. I think I've got my point clear. As said, I like Gou, but very much dislike the way he's written in such fast pacing and in a way that, despite statistics stating otherwise, making him feel like he's the sole protag and not sharing spotlight as dual protag. And I hope to god I can get rid of this feeling as the series goes on. Because right now, I don't have high hopes :(

If you've read this far, thank you for reading, and I am so, so sorry this became a long long rant about the issues I have with Gou, but I hope I managed to bring out what I like about him as well. Hopefully next time's gonna be a more positive post, as I'll try writing about my full on feelings about the handling of Koharu, or as dub audience knows her, Chloe.

Once again, thanks for reading, have a good evening or morning or whatever time it is by the time you've read this, and I hope you'll have a fantastic time ♥ And as a reminder, these are just my opinions, and if you disagree, you are totally valid.

Til next time! This was Smiling Performer aka Aleira, signing out!