#do we wanna remember him
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#Saw a man bite straight through a chicken bone on YouTube.#I was gripped. In awe.#A jaw strength rivaled only by - I thought to myself - Present Mic#can't even remember how I got onto the video but it's stuck with me ever since#he had a captivating positive vibe. I would enjoy a meal with him. The chicken looked a little underdone though#bnha#mha#shouta aizawa#hizashi yamada#present mic#bnha comic#not even technically a comic this bad boy is two slides#always thinking about the rooftop gang naming Sushi like 'whats everyones favourite food?'#and Yamada says 'fried chicken' like that would be the best name for a cat- actually. you know what. that is a pretty good name for a cat#Might call my next tarantula Fried Chicken. Who knows?#Edited the last panel to take out the speech bubble cause it looked like I was implying it was weird to eat bone marrow#But I meant the entire bone itself like the crunchy bit#But apparently they do that in some places so I thought that it might come across as a bit insensitive and I didnt wanna get cancelled.#eat bones if you want I would love to eat bones but I'm a coward#It's not really a thing in the UK I don't think. I've never seen anyone do it. I guess we just produce a lot of food waste.#so nobody was going to tell me you could eat bones? I just had to find out myself on Youtube?
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@cringe-control I wish you could see the look on my face right now
#I can’t speak. I can’t speak#I said ‘I’ll spare him from major angst’ fully knowing that I would be liable to change that later#and not 3 months later did I promptly remember the way last life ended and the way s8 ended#glances at Mumbo’s whole “steal Grian’s soul to become human’’ stunt. um#yeah do we wanna talk about the implications of doing that as an android#an android who was trying so badly to hide that he was anything other than a robot and now is willing to meddle with souls to try to#become more human#erm#yeah#so about that mumbo comic#dbhc#dbhc mumbo
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A kiss from Death
#prince's art tag#persona 3#persona 3 reload#p3#p3r#persona 3 spoilers#persona 3 reload spoilers#p3r spoilers#ryomina#ryoji mochizuki#persona 3 ryoji#minato arisato#makoto yuki#persona 3 protagonist#I have many feelings about the added Ryoji content one of them being:#THEY SHOULD OF KISSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#LIKE IF THEY COULDNT DO IT ON 12/1 THEN THEY SHOULD OF ON 12/31#like with this piece he does it when you choose to kill him but regardless of your choice I think he should of done it#im glad they added in his love for the protag regardless of gender that was brought up in the femc route in portable but AAAAAAAA#i know whyyyyy but they should of let it happen like dklsghdslg#sorry. when i played 12/1 in reload i lost my shit#and this image that i drew would not leave my mind especially when i got to 12/31#so something i wanna point out: in reload if you choose to kill him the protag wields the evoker with his right hand#BUT in other versions he wields it with his left#I chose to go with the left here one bc you can't see his right eye well bc of his hair#but two theres something there like all game he uses his right hand but to take out death he uses his left#idk i think its neat and i wish they kept it but i guess they changed it bc he never uses his left hand otherwise#also tried a textured layered rendering style. it takes so long to do but i tend to like layering the colors on sooooo there we are#idk if ill remember how to do this next time i draw tho lolol
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Batman #149 by chip zdarsky is mostly unremarkable, but I'm really fascinated by how it makes a great case for 'good' endings not saving 'bad' stories*. Because there's a lot of interesting concepts in this issue (bruce having to deal with his rapidly aging and decaying clone making him think about his own life, re-establishing a 'nest' so to speak for his family after pushing them away, etc) but bc of the OOC slog that came before it, almost every moment w/ the batfamily comes off as unearned and disingenuous imo.
Like, everything with Damian is the perfect example in this. Because in isolation it's...fine. admittedly it's a missed opportunity to not go deeper into how Damian would feel about a clone of his dad who tried to kill considering Damian's relationships with clones of himself (the heretic rejects and respawn) or with former enemies who wanted him dead but who were manipulated and/or brainwashed (like suren and maya).
Zdarsky doesn't go into any of this but you could maybe excuse it as the issue not being about Damian. However, coupled with the previous bizarre characterizations of Damian in 147 and 148, it ends up not being fine- instead it starts to feel...icky how Damian (who, despite often being drawn and written as white, will never have his connection to the non-white al ghuls forgotten and will always be effected by racism even when not portrayed as a poc) is constantly written as overly violent, uncaring and narrow minded in this run. Coupled w/ trying to recanonize the morrison origin for Damian it's like. OH this is badly written and laden with subtle bigotry, sick**
That's me going into detail on it with Damian but it's applicable to other things in this issue- the way Cass, Steph and Duke have all been ignored or turned into jobbers makes their inclusion in the 'family' here feel hollow instead of satisfying. Bruce proclaiming that Zur was still a part of him and he needs to accept responsibility for his actions (when it means taking in clone son) wrings hollow when just last issue zdarsky was bending over backwards to separate Bruce and Zur bc otherwise the Jason thing would get really awkward. Ends are achieved through means that feel hollow or strange. I'm at my destination but damn why'd the bus have to do all that???
I only really have opinions on this latest arc of zdarskys Batman bc it's the one I've read the closest (bc I'm a hater, masochist and avid follower of even the bad damian storylines) but it's not saying great things.
Bc zdarsky can do one thing good in this book, and it's write Bruce and Tim. And yet this entire story, whether of his own volition or editorial mandate, includes other characters who aren't Bruce and Tim, the fabric starts to unravel in very telling ways.
(p.s, I think pennyworth manor is an interesting idea but I feel like in execution it's just gonna be 'bruce living in a house haunted by the memory of the people he couldn't save' but with a different dead guy this time. Illusion of change and whatnot)
*whether or not the ending is good is up to you ofc, as is your opinion on the proceeding arc! I saw some ppl complain that the ending was too "WFA" for them, which I get even if I dont think it'll literally be the same premise. If anything it's probably a lead into the new tec run. Likewise many ppl who aren't in the weeds of Damian and Jason characterization liked the previous arc! But I have my opinions and rest my case before the bench
**disclaimer, I'm white and portrayals of bigotry in comics are complicated and subjective, but I am basing my point here off what other poc comic fans on socmed have been saying about 149. Also the "sick" is sarcasm incase that wasn't obvious
#ramblings of a lunatic#dc comics#dc#damian wayne#bruce wayne#uhhh. not gonna tag the others i dont have time#batman#idk if the zdarsky series has its own tag#anyway yeah. i saw some interesting discussions surrounding 149 and it got me thinking#the experience of reading the issue is inoffensive until i remember how we got here and then all of a sudden i start to feel downright evil#the bruce/zur separation thing pisses me off so bad. MOTHERFUCKER YOU WERE JUST SAYING LAST ISSUE THAT NONE OF IT WAS HIM#and maybe we were meant to agree w Bruce and not Jason in that issue but if that's the case. piss poor job demonstrating it#Bruce never really faces like. interpersonal consequences from the family that last beyond an issue#which is WILD considering the shit he pulled back before they knew he was having a menty b (mental breakdown for those who dont know)#the damian thing is just like. its such clear author bias in ways both lowkey funny and also. not funny. at all#i know a lot of ppl on here didnt vibe w/ batman and robin by joshua williamson but like#i cannot stress enough how he was one of the ONLY ppl in damians corner and now hes leaving that series#he says he approves of the new creative teams assigned but also they're his coworkers. so i dont trust SHIT until its in my hands#anyway one day I'll give a more good faith reading of zdarskys Batman and i do wanna read his daredevil some day#but as it stands he suffers from terminal ''has seemingly never read a comic not abt my special white boys and refuses to try''#which means everyone is going to have to suffer through my haterism#also sorry for no images. i really want to but i just don't have the wherewithal to do alt text rn
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it's always such an odd feeling remembering the people you loved so long ago
#★#was reminded of a guy i'd met on tumblr actually#we both wrote haikyuu reader inserts at the time sghks#do i wanna know by the arctic monkeys reminded me of him every time i listened to it#it still does#i still have some of our old messages on my old(er) tumblr#oh how i read and reread and reread those sgjkgs#what an odd odd feeling to remember him i hope he's well
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if we're talking about weird ways the prequel movies handled raven and erik, i still can't really get over how they
- made a huge plot point of first class physical mutations
- erased erik's physical mutation (his white hair)
- made raven's opinion on her physical mutation that she doesn't wanna hide it
- then proceed to have her shapeshifted and hide it almost constantly
- then gave quicksilver and polaris their unnatural hair colors that they should have inherited from erik
it's just hilarious to me. i wanna see the talks that lead to these decisions.
i think At Most i can justify raven hiding her true form as a way to protect herself and/or because she's insecure: evidently a lot of people dont act kindly to blue scaled women (tho i did wish she showed her true form more while at the cia base with the other mutants) and it's fair to assume that even if she wants to be out and proud she has some apprehension about it because of Aforementioned safety/confidence issues
everything else tho yeah LOL whats all this then. wasnt in the budget i support- tho i stilllll so badly wish that they at least let erik's hair go white in apocalypse ..... that woulda been cool at least .....
#snap chats#quicksilver having his silver hair could be justified in-universe as him dyeing it or something#i dont know. i cant speak for the decisions made when making these movies vjALKVAKJV#like if we reaaaalllyy wanna talk bout weird things the movies did i think my weirdest bits would be charles' family#i dont know why they had it be implied charles and his mother werent on good terms when it was pretty much the opposite in comics#i mean there really was no reason why raven couldnt shift into kurt marco but whatever#then its kinda funny how cain is just. Not Really Relevant. his family ties to charles isnt really relevant if i remember right#tho on that note it couldve been funny/horrifying if cain had to grow up with raven AND charles#congratulations you have two mutant siblings to hate now. jesus cjerLKAERERJ#BUT yeah. my cope at least is that these movies are their own isolated universes so w/e the canon is then ill take it#i do wish we got white hair erik tho. ill mourn that forever i fear. also mystique's cool outfit i wish we got that but mOVING ON
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thinking about Bodkin again bc I mean,,, ALL THE SYMBOLISM OHHHHHGH. i NEED some tumblr film analysis hobbyists to watch this show and tell me all the themes n such
#yes I’m making all these posts in a row#it’s bc I’m obsessed atm#mypost#Bodkin#bodkin netflix#PLEASSEEEEE#WHY DID THE PAPER MACHE HEAD LOOK LIKE GILBERT#CAN WE HAVE AN IN-DEPTH CONVERSATION ABOUT EVERYTHING ABOUT GILBERT BEING FORCED TO SWALLOW/CHOKE ON HIS WORDS (recorder) BUT THAT SOUND—HIS#STORY (HIS pov. however ‘abstract’ and detatched from consequence it may have been) BEING WHAT CATCHES EMMY AND DOVEs ATTENTION TO SAVE HIM#. LIKE#OUGHHHHHWJEHQIHSJSBWJXNAJSNNQJZNWHXJWHXJEBXNDUSBJS#AND THE WOLF IMAGERY PLS SOMEONE TELL ME ABOUT THAT#IS THERE MORE THAN THE SURFACE? what do I not understand? as im writing this out am thinking: ok its cause dove is a lone wolf#WAITTTT WAIT OMFG AND when she remembers that her mom told her to howl when she was lost… bc wolves actually have family and I’m p sure the#lone wolf thing is a myth… after she realizes that she’s not alone and she can choose to interact#GOD GRAHHHHH IM GOING CRAZY OVER THIS SHOW#other things I’m thinking abt (will maybe make a post abt?)#OUGH YEAH OK dove symbolism: wolf/lone wolf. sunglasses/shielding herself (OUGH AND SHE PICKS UP THAT XTRA LAYER OF DEFENCE WHEN SHE COMES#BACK TO HOMELAND/familiar space… bc she’s vulnerable to her past here…. hrahhh#. also LMFAO when she calls the sheriff a piggy#hrmmmmm aughhh I want to dissect Gilbert and Seamus’s friendship oughhh#ok wait even more on Dove: I want to dig into when she calls Emmy Emmy vs Sizargd (will have to look up the spelling whoops) —was it always#blatant manipulation? how much of it is a reflection of what she is? hrmmmm there’s so much there I think#another Q: why did Emmy call the tech guy Shitpants again at the end? ik there were the stakes I just wanna dig into her character more. why#would she say the shitpants thing instead of manipulating him in other ways? (not saying her was was unreasonable at all lol-j wanna dig#into her character.#OH prob something abt the whole ‘her needing to release her anger’ thing? idk ahh I want to analyze her more
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A bit of a rant under cut coz ACOFAS broke into my house, tore my heart from my chest and smashed my feelings with a sledgehammer.
Warning: Strong Feelings about a Fairy Book Xmas Special
Why is this book so fucking mean to Tamlin? Dude messed up at the beggining (with good intentions) but after a certain point he's doing everything right to make up. He drags Beron to help in battle. He save's Feyre from Hybern. He passes on the INCREDIBLE opportunity to be a petty bitch and revives Rhys with a 'Be happy Feyre' and then fucks off to be sad by himself. What more redemption do you want? What more can the dude possibly do?? Clearly nothing. As multiple characters just randomly think to themselves he's just the worst and no matter how much good he does it'll never make up for *checks notes* locking Feyre in a house that one time. Like I'm going crazy here. Dude's not doing anything anymore. Not like he's coming back with a vengance he's just highkey depressed in his sad house. And here's Morrigan thinking how much she'd like to kill him one day. Here's Rhys poping in to berrate him. God forbid he fixes things with Lucien. Stay miserable you sad fuck. Ok maybe he feels a little bad after but everyone assures him it's fine acctually. It's always moraly ok to bully Tamlin. You're the bigger male most times. ugh Then you think ok maybe he'll fix it, maybe there was a point to it all. Sure enough here comes Rhys again. His approach is a little better! 'Eat, Tamlin'. Wow did he get some godamn empathy for Solstice? But no he just can't help himself. 'You can waste and die when it's convenient for me. What you thought I'd actually had sympathy for you??'
I just??? it's so MEAN. so petty. If it was the villain Rhysand arc I'd be cheering. But I'm supposed to be rooting for this dude?? I thought it was a low stakes filler book where they exchange gifts and have a delightful little snowball fight. what is this???
#my art#acotar#acotar fanart#tamlin#anti rhysand#acofas#every time i remember those scenes i wanna fight rhysand in a parking lot#there's NO reason to be this mean#'oh i'll bully tamlin then fight him once he gets angry it'll be so fun to destory his house more as we brawl'#'what do you mean he's too depressed to bite back. why you always ruin everything tamlin'#stop coming to his house challenge#this damn book is the only one of the series that consistently makes me cry#pro tamlin
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can ppl in this fandom like... stop... implying that transmasculinity in hcs or (especially) canon is shallow or misogynistic or even transmisogynistic on princible, like literally just by being prescent in someones mind or in the text. like that doesnt fuckin feel good. thats kind of really nasty to imply. if its not okay to say about other trans experiences, maybe dont say it about this one either. why is there a weird little exception here. yall KNOW how much that sucks to hear all day every day. what the fuck
#my t#idk how to tell the hs fandom that every piece of trans coding in roxy in hs1 can be read as transmasc too. like transfem and transmasc#at the same time from the EXACT same reasons. its almost like we all share experiences just by way of being trans. weird i know#its almost like being trans rlly truly highlights what it is to be human and how we are all in fact at the end of the day human together#i just want everyone to stop trying to 'poke holes' in other fans trans hcs FULL STOP across the board no matter who they are#or what the hc is. its needlessly hurtful and more often than not trips into real peoples dysphoria which then#makes the target more likely to lash out. so the person poking them abt it can do a ''SEE? THEYRE ALL MEAN ONE OF THEM#WAS MEAN TO ME JUST NOW'' routine. its so obviously a 'im not touching u!!!' playground maneuver like holy fuck grow up#if you wanna fight for transfem/me folks right to just exist random fans personal headcanons is not the fuckin time or place#the XY in roxys name could be read as her having been DMAB or it could be hussie having a long running giggle about him preordering#his own transmasculinity. roxys colour being pink could be bc shes a girl or it could be compcis!!!#roxys desperation for a bf is from loneliness in canon but its often read as her feeling like she needs one to be a real girl#it can ALSO be read as another aspect of him struggling with compcis and comphet esp w/ his fantasies abt being 'a mother'#yknow what i never fuckin see that rlly highlights the fact that this is just a shitty 'girls rule boys drool' thing? theres like. no#discussions on the potential of roxy being any kinda intersex. absolutely none. he could be mtftm for all you fuckin know#but oh yknow being mtftm is A Shallow Read so we cant have that. hs is only for girls didnt you know we need to terf- i mean turf#out every single instance of queer mascness bc its Evil in the text didnt you know#god help the fandoms word of god token trans boy dirk strider for 'choosing' his eternal misery while everyone else is enlightened#by way of transforming into a girl. bc we must place girlhood on an inhuman pedistal of perfection and niceness and joy and rainbows#like what IS this mahou shojo brand gender essentialism???? im fuckin sick of it#can we remember that girlhood isnt & wasnt safe or joyful for everyone & that that can translate into how we curate our fandom experiences
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>> I'M THINKING MIKU MIKU OO-EE-OO <?>
#the batman 2022#edward nashton#hatsune miku#vocaloid#fanart#digital illustration#do you guys remember when it was a big ol trend on twt to draw miku as a movie character or whatever#i did this back then but never posted it#ive been doing Badly but its mostly bc i have a tomcat in my apartment lol#my cat has had tummy issues for a good long while and nothing seems to fix it so the vet gave us the go-ahead to neuter him anyways#im fairly certain its all just stress now and man no one talks about how hard it is to keep a poor hormonal tomcat relaxed#and we have the advantage that he's fully indoors and we dont have any other cats#its been terrible anyways¡¡#so yeah ive halted drawing for that reason#its been raining like crazy too#should i just offer drawings for money¿¿ i can scrunch up like an hour a day on my bf's pc i think#i wanna buy rain pants so badly#i'll do a price sheet i think#buy drawings from me so i can buy rain pants and vegetables#im going thru it im sorry#have a nice day (':#i hope you have a better day than me at least haha
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hotd twitter is turning me into a reddit atheist istg
#.txt#like its ok that you're a christian ig but can you keep that shit to yourself#'dont say x character suffered more than jesus it's disrespectful to The Lord' ok should we cry#and it's alwaysss with tg characters like it's so clear they just wanna epicly dunk on a post about a character they dont like lol#and I guess 'this is disrespectful to my religion' seems more legitimate than 'um no they didn't suffer...they're evil and mean'#I remember at some point someone was like 'its ok to compare SOME asoiaf characters to jesus but not alicent or aegon'#ok you're just drawing arbitrary lines now 💀 its literally just. character I like=ok character I dont like=not ok#I think their 'ok' example was like. robb and cat which. why are they ok and alicent isnt lol#like why is it ok to compare a feudal king responsible for the deaths of thousands of smallfolk to jesus huh??#jesus was all about the poor isnt it disrespectful to compare him to any asoiaf chracter since they're all nobles. just saying#anyway when did it become hashtag woke to be pro-christianity I feel like I'm losing my mind#it's like. this recent trend of repackaging conservative ideas with progressive language I dont like it at all can we stop#hotd twitter looooves doing this I need to kill them with hammers
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Zero Day (2002)
#movies film cinema#zero day#ben coccio#I actually talked to the director on Facebook super nice guy and he told#me a lot about the filmmaking process and even helped me with tips on directing non-actors and new actors#I remember him telling me to always be supportive and tell your new actors they're doing a good job even if they aren't in the first take#cause you can instill confidence and still reshape and change their choices and mistakes later#Sometimes I'd message him for advice when I was running into problems on some of my early projects#he told me once ''did ya choose to collaborate with this actor cause you were lonely or you guys had passion and chemistry''#“collaborating is like a relationship” and he was so right#there's nothing worse than working with people you disdain cause there's no communication and no trust.#he told me how he wrote the first couple of drafts of Place Beyond the Pines but his take on the 3rd act wasn't clicking for the director#so he took the script and went and had another writer rewrite the 3rd act but he liked the process cause he learned a lot and still got pai#but I'd still like to see Ben Coccio's take on Place Beyond The Pines he says the 1st and 2nd act are mostly unchanged#Ryan Gosling's scenes are still mostly the same he said but he couldn't tell me too much cause of the NDA he signed#The bloopers of Zero Day are hilarious his tip he gave me about being supportive#“This is actually great but can we-” and Cal interrupts him “He says that no matter what if you're doing good or bad!” and everyone lols#I hope I can make it and ask him to collab with me on a script#He's such a nice dude compared to the harrowing film he made.#I wish there was BTS but he had only one tape to film on and this was made when digital camcorders were infants#I think he had only one 2 hour tape that's how low budget#The bloopers is just Cal or Andre secretly filming and Ben getting annoyed “Is it recording?” and Cal going “Nah..."#Cal is such a funny guy IRL I wanna see him act more cause he's so good. He was so great at playing a sadistic psychopath in this.#the final shooting is so harrowing and disturbing#I told Ben he srsly gut punched me/disturbed me and this is what made him really open up.
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just saw a post by goobiestar where tigerclaw has been put on babysitting duty and they doodled him surrounded by tiny babies thinking "i cant believe bluestar is making me babysit a bunch of drooling pathetic whiny pieces of--" and with bonefall tigerstar being a genuinely good dad (at least when his babies were tiny) i have this image in my head of firepaw imagining this is what's happening and then it cuts to tigerclaw calmly playing teeterstrike with the babies
I'm telling a super different story from the other guys in my orbit LMAO, I've noticed that also. A lot of my.... fellow satellites? Companion Comets. Peripheral Planets. Lean into the comedy angle of Tigerclaw being a nasty little boy
I especially love that one comic (I think it's Blimbo?) Where he sees his younger sibs and just starts kitty-smacking them like a real cat lmao. Top tier. If the punchline is "KITTY SMACK" you'll kill me every time.
But yah BB!Tigerclaw is really important to understand as like... a guy. Just a shitty guy, has some good things about him, but ultimately the darkness within him is run-of-the-mill. He isn't special. Firestar comes to understand that any one of the dozens of assholes in his life could have become Tigerstar-- and that's TERRIFYING.
Evil is mundane and common. Goodness is complicated and unique.
So your image is spot on lmao. Young Fireheart watching him from across camp like, "ill PROVE his evil to bluestar. Look at him now. What is he doing with swiftkit. Something horrible im sure. He probably hates kittens"
And Tigerclaw is pressing his mouth to Swiftkit's baby belly and going PTHHHBBBBB.
#Though I do think it's important that Firepaw respected Tiger at first#And it's an easily forgotten detail#But like... we should remember it more imo#Firepaw realized that Tigerclaw was evil not because of immediate suspicion#But because the respected and beloved senior warrior was a XENOPHOBE#Of COURSE Firepaw realized it before the other members of the clan#They were blind to it because the entire Clan is BIGOTED#They did not see the warning signs as important because his first open targets where the powerless#Gray and Raven and Fire#People you're allowed to bully and threaten.#But Firepaw. Who is NEW to the Clan. With a FRESH perspective. Can see it immediately that Ravenpaw is being abused#And that Tiger often uses his status to bully those below him including himself#RE: The thesis of BB!TPB being ultimately that SCOURGE IS RIGHT#And that the Clans need to change.#Bone babble#Also I only hesitate to call anyone mutuals because I actually follow veeerrrry few ppl on tumblr#I read tmblr like a newspaper. When I wanna see what some guy is up to I check their blog lmao#And read back. Then close it out#Heavy dashboard scary. Elder Bones needs quiet time#I read other blogs like newspaper
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seeing septuple?
[Version without Fraud BF, Guy, and Yourself under cut]
#Friday Night Funkin#FNF#Boyfriend FNF#FLAnimal#Silly Billy FNF#Yourself FNF#Fraud BF#Lookalike FNF#Mislay FNF#Guy#FNF OC#Phone Arts#tbh yourself (not sb) lookalike and mislay weren't gonna be in this at first. but then i remembered them and had to#i KNOW there was another mod with an evil bf + a different reject bf but um. THERE'S 7 OF THEM ALREADY. OKAY#there's also 11:39 bf + vs convict bf but i didnt count them since they're convict's diguises#'iisn't fraud also a disguise' well he inspired guy so he has to be there ok. and i like him#anyways it was fun to modify all of them-#(minus mislay. sorry mislay. we love you mislay.)#with specific stuff from my own bf design#i might do another with gf + pico but not a lot of doppelgangers come to mind. we'll see#anyways! last full drawing of the year!#OH UPDATE. since this is queued and I don't wanna go back to edit in tags#I'm referring to vs c0re mod regarding evil bf#Unfortunately there's like. No trace of bro on c0re's wiki. I'd probably have to go for the mod 2 get him
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I get hating certain political systems and trying to abolish totalitarian regimes but at the same time many of them are so interwoven with our history and society they have become tropes and when I consume media with a setting where the monarchy is absolute and revered then I am playing my part and sucking that princeling off
#litchi.txt#there are games that address this kinda stuff! and thats good! its good that there are games talking about how this is bad!#but at the same time when I go into a game knowing I will be the prince's sword and shield I dont expect the game to be anti-monarchy#despite having pretty strong opinions on many a thing I tend to put most of them away the moment I engage with media#imperialism bad. monarchy bad. doesnt mean I cant enjoy roleplaying in a game where I help these systems#because guess what its fictional and not everything needs to be a strong statement about politics#sometimes we just... wanna vibe with a setting#I am so very thoroughly exhausted from the politics in this country and where things are going I just kinda need that no brainer gameplay#even if it means working as the secret police for an emperor#even if it means replacing one dictator with another#because its still a game#a lot of people talk about imperialism-monarchy-colonialism with these things because they are a big issue even today#and they are important to talk about!! in real world!!#but I rarely see people be this upset about like religion etc which like. thats also a massive problem.#idk Im just tired of trying to look at fanart of all my fantasy medieval games and people being upset that the games#are not super anti-monarchy despite the marketing being literally 'you are the emperor's bestie. you help him out and go on a quest.'#'your quest is to manipulate local government to support the emperor and do his bidding'#like idk how That is supposed to be a game that addresses it properly#and maybe it does but ig since the MC doesnt look at the player and go REMEMBER KIDS! THIS IS EVIL AND BAD AND WHY MONARCHY SUCKS#it doesnt count??? I guess???
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For the first time since I can remember I did not hate every second around my family and… not only that actually…. Kinda enjoyed myself? Idk, just got home and I’m real tired but I think that’s just cuz I was up early and busy and then had the drive home. Christmas stuff and all that. My mom did…? Get me a pair of shoes that were lesbian colors…. I can’t tell if that was some insane coincidence and she didn’t know or her trying to say/do something all things considered. Apparently my siblings kept telling her I wouldn’t like them when she picked them out (which is fair I wear almost exclusively all black and mostly boots over tennis shoes) but she insisted so…. Mmm…. On the one hand I wish she would just like… say something? But if it was some weird way of being supportive I guess it was kinda sweet? Idk. I might be reading into it and it was just a coincidence
They also all insisted on helping me move in February which kinda has me like ???? Because I’ve moved four times since I’ve moved out and they have never once done a THING to help even when I lived much closer but I’ll take it cuz that means I won’t have to rent a truck cuz they’ll bring theirs and I won’t have to hire ppl to move the big furniture so that’s a lot of money I’ll be saving
They're also giving me one of the beds and mattresses from my great grandma's house since they've been clearing it out after she died a few months ago because when they asked what all I would I have to move and didn't say a bed and then explained my bed is a 20+yo mattress laid directly on the floor they were like :/ which obvi I know wasn't ideal I just couldn't afford to get a new one but now I won't have to. Obviously it's used but it's still only a year or so old they said, and I don't think I've EVER had a mattress that wasn't at least 15 years old so that'll be nice. I hope it helps some of my back issues...
Anyways, idk what fucking happened to these people in the span of a couple months but it kinda feels unreal
#they also got me some manga which…..#some of it was manga I wanted!!!#however one of the series I told her I wanted was blue exorcist and. well.#I guess she forgot the second half of the title because she got me volumes of some manga that was blue something#I don’t even remember I’d never heard of it before and when I read the summary it’s some slice of life romance#so now I have random volumes of the middle of that series that I have to figure out something to do with……#cant say I really wanna read it lol#didn’t bother to tell her it was the wrong series cuz tbh that was way more effort than she’s ever put into my actual interests#so I’ll take it ig#ugh this is so weird#it’s like. I can tell she’s trying to do better after we had that conversation last month#which yeah in some ways is nice obviously but really I just feel complicated#cuz it doesn’t fix everything else even if she gets better now#and also it was easier to just accept she fucking sucked and hate her#I think I still kinda hate her but…. ugh like I said idk it’s complicated#anyways my siblings also made me play Fortnite with them which I’d never played that#it was okay I guess#met my grandparents new puppy they’re obsessed with#(they’re both convinced they hate pets and ended up with him cuz my uncle got it for his daughter except both of them are bad a taking care#of things so he ended up with my grandparents)#but they’re so clearly obsessed with this fucking dog oh my god like it’s insane#they’re both the epitome of that joke about the dad not wanting the cat but then absolutely loving the cat#kaz rambles
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