#do we not remember actaeon Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[seasicksilver]

ares & aphrodite designs ...for no reason in particular

[g00pygunkyguy]

31 Days of Hellenic Polytheism

Haven’t found time to do this with Christmas with family and Epic the musicals last saga releasing and getting so fixated on it I can’t think about anything else so,

here they are,

DAY TWENTY-FIVE: What was the most surprising thing you’ve learnt about Hellenic Polytheism or your deities?

I guess that it exists is the most surprising thing i learnt about it, way back when i first wanted to worship the gods i didn’t know it was actually a thing still done.

I once tried to give an offering to Zeus with absolutely no research, I put a chocolate bar on my window and asked Him for something - i don’t remember what i asked for tho

but when i realised it was a thing people still did i started my research :3

DAY TWENTY-SIX: Do you celebrate any festivals? Which ones or why not?

Currently I don’t, i haven’t found time to learn about them or how to celebrate them

(if anyone has any good like websites or anything that has information on festivals i would love them <3)

DAY TWENTY-EIGHT: What is your favourite myth?

Oooo, my favourite myth might just be Hermes’s birth story - when He stole Apollo’s cattle.

I think the image of Apollon going up to Zeus and going ‘He stole my cattle! Tell him to give them back!’ while holding an infant wrapped in a couple blankets above His head like… that’s is funny

And the myth of Artemis and Actaeon, i made a school presentation on it one time for english as we could make a presentation about whatever we wanted so it’s clearly one I like :3

DAY TWENTY-NINE: What is an aspect of your deities you really appreciate?

MUSIC!!!

I heavily appreciate music aspect of Lord Apollon, it’s one of my favourite things in the world so obviously it’s something I appreciate in Him.

If I’m not doing anything, I’m listening to music, not listening then singing, if not singing then humming and if I can’t do anything of those? It’s playing in my brain!

DAY THIRTY: Do you have a visual interpretation of your deities? Is this different from usual depictions you see of them?

I kinda do?

It’s not really different from usual depiction a of Lord Apollon it’s always switching round to how others make Him.

Sometimes it’s His statue, sometimes it’s like a beginner artists drawing of Him, sometimes it’s how people draw Him in Percy Jackson, sometimes it’s an odd looking Minecraft skin.

[bnnuy-wabbit]

HAAIIIIII you can call me Lago, im 21 (i dont know how EITHER), im just some guy*. this is my main blog and where i throw funny things that makes my brain produce juices and also random ass personal poasts.

one of those he/shes they never warned you about (pathogenic variant they have yet to make any vaccines to protect you from)

my art tag is #feral art tag.

there will be adult things in this blog because im an adult. follow at your own risk etc. were horny in here towards men occasionaly.

I'm brazilian. From Brazil. As in born here, living here and stuck here for the foreseeable future. é nois 🤙

Everybody says I'm really nice! I am Unable to hit people up first though, but if you'd like to be friends, send me an ask and I'll give you my discord!!!!

i have many interests (mostly music and nerd shit) and funny things that I'll be putting under the read more lest this post get Unbearably Big. There are flashing blinkies down there by the way.

OK SO INTERESTS. I like MANY things! and i have favorite things! I think it's really cool of me to have favorites. i decided I'm going to wear them on my sleeve. anyways Here's some things i Like.

MUSIC!!! its one of my favorite things ever. I play the guitar and a bit of bass. heres stuff in no particular order of favoriteness. Just stuff i care enough right now to remember.

Linkin Park (meteora, hybrid theory <3)

My Chemical Romance

Red Hot Chili Peppers

Mindless Self Indulgence

scalene

Rammstein

Ft-rj (listen to it or i am going to chase you with a broom)

francisco el hombre (i recommend the rasgacabeza album)

danny bond

2000-10s pop!!! fuck it, lady gaga, britney spears, kesha, katy perry, black eyed peas, that sorta jazz.

Every single Homestuck song there is. i have listened to all of them multiple times. My favorite albums are colours and mayhem and also the beforus fan album.

Dad rock (acdc, queen, talking heads, nirvana, judas priest, Some pink floyd etc)

Industrial and Adjacent. I've been listening to code:redcore a lot and some grammostola actaeon lately. processor also fucks.

OTHER THINGS I ENJOY

Eragon (the books)

Disco elysium.

ADVENTURE TIME. I AM OBSESSED.

How to train your dragon (the books. specifically.)

Animated movies!!! Specially the hand drawn ones.

My horrible little OCs (@honsebeasts just go there but also Beware.)

Worldbuilding. I do aliens and monster speculative biology. Most of my thoughts on it are on the Above mentioned blog though.

Real life physiology and anatomy also

MEN (and like 3 fictional women.)

HORSES!!!!!!!!!!!

stranger things

Pokemen (i do not know a single thing after gen 6 though.)

Dungeons and dragons, sometimes

Traditional art like watercolors and oil pastels

Drawing my blorbos in the same side facing pose or just standing there.

Drawing in General actually! Designing characters is my passion

Fictional fathers

sewing and felting and sculpting and painting and singing and playing

COLORS. i love colors. i love looking at them. i love playing with them. i would like to eat them if i could. i love warm palettes.

Hiveswap (pissing screaming CRYING)

MONSTERS!!!!!! They're really cool and gay and hot.

Portal (the games. all of them. glafos........ kissing her)

Half Life.

y2k and 80s-90s vibes. i think its awesome.

I am afflicted by the human condition and also a few other funnier conditions. my brain and my body dont work right.

If you want to know the brunt of the brain ones: autism adhd avpd. they all impact heavily how i interact with people with people. Sorry in advance if i can't keep conversation going.

I'm some sort of queer thing. If we need to get really specific, id say "bisexual aromantic bigender femme", mostly into men and butches, but Queer will do just fine. I'm a self entitled part time pretty fag and ugly dyke in my free hours. Intersex it turns out.

[demigoddreamer]

LGBTQ+ Themes in Greek Mythology

I'm no Greek Mythology expert i don't have any professional qualifications whatsoever(tho when i go to college imma minor in classics with a bio major but you don't care sorry :'(

i'm just a nerd who spends way too much time researching/reading a million books(calling all PJO fans/riordanverse in general i'm a fan too)on greek mythology(btw any of you read song of achilles, that shit broke my heart but i can't help it i just love greek mythology adaptations so fucking much)

these aren't in order i don't have a particular timeline but i think it's important to discuss lgbtq+ themes in greek mythology in SOME CAPACITY especially with something called ERASURE I SAID GREECE WAS GAY YALL but the greeks were more sexually fluid so they don't really have labels for this the same way we do and the way we defined their sexuality is not how we define it but this is most likely how it would've translated in the modern world and it's still important because seeing lgbtq+ figures in ancient cultures proves their existence and that we're here and queer, I can't do everyone here so i might do a part 2 if yall want

*Zeus did have like maybe 1 or 2 male lovers, the most notable ganymede but like Zeus is an asshole he's not cool enough to be queer so no i'm not going in depth about him AT ALL

1. Apollo

we all know Apollo, god of: music, poetry, healing, sun/light, archery, prophecy

but also he's THE bisexual icon(there are other gods like Hermes and Dionysus notable for male lovers I said Hermes was pan in like he was literally the god pan at one point and he's pansexual) but Apollo has the most male lovers out of any god and he does have a fuckton of female lovers(not nearly as many as zeus tho, no one gonna surpass him) Apollo is also depicted to be extremely hot no pun intended but also having a rather feminine appearance

some of his famous same sex lovers include:

Hyacinthus(this one my fav)- so fucking tragic got turned into the hyacinth plant

Admetus- no tragic end for Admetus unfortunately Admetus is a...straight-ie(I usually only call the cringe straights straighties but i'm just in pain in how Apollo hopelessly pines over him)

There's others but they're not as notable so imma speedrun but if you want me to talk more about them in depth and other lgbtq+ themes in greek mythology ask for a part 2

2. Hermaphroditus

This god was the son of Hermes and Aphrodite(please don't ask how THAT happened it just did)

Hermaphroditus is intersex, he's the god of intersex people, a symbol of androgyny and is the reason why intersex animals like snails(they have male & female reproductive parts) are called "Hermaphrodites"

The story is Hermaphroditus was just chilling in a body of water when the nymph Salmacis jumped on top of him while he was chilling and intended to rape him and she called on the gods to make it so that she and Hermaphroditus would be together forever so the gods merged them together into a partly female and male individual

3. Chaos

if any of yall read hesiod's theogony or...just hear stuff elsewhere, you may have heard of this creation myth where in the beginning there was a primordial kind of emptiness or void which was Chaos and this is mostly a headcanon but i legit cannot remember if they refer to Chaos gender AT ALL sooooo

NON-BINARY NON-BINARY NON-BINARY

4. Sipriotes

There are multiple stories of Gods changing mortals gender maybe as divine punishment, to help disguise them/protect them or whatever so the mortals may go mtf or ftm so TRANGENDER

Sipriotes isn't the most notable or even the most important in fact she only gets like a 1 line mention in some author's work but she's important to me

because she has some agency in this story. basically i think what happened is that she(he at the time) saw Artemis bathing(like actaeon but the reason that Artemis gets mad at her isn't clear since this myth is so obscure and it's not certain if the bathing is even the "correct version" or correct as can be with greek myth) so Artemis in retribution gave Sipriotes an ultimatum, she could either be given a woman body and join Artemis's hunters or worse so Sipriotes chose the hunters and the woman bod

5. Iphis and Ianthe

There are 2 people in this one cause 1. this is much longer than i anticipated and i don't think people wanna read that much 2. these people aren't important enough to have their own and their stories are so intertwined that individual sections would be too short and basically the same

Iphis was raised as a dude despite being a woman so one day when Iphis gets married they are offered to a woman named Ianthe. Iphis is sad because Iphis fell in love with Ianthe(mutual) but Iphis knows they can't be together as 2 women so Iphis prays to the gods for a solution to be able to marry Ianthe so the gods like turn Iphis into a dude

so this could be a trans guy with a bi?(if ianthe knew iphis was a woman) woman or technically this could be seen as wlw or i should say sapphic cause this greek i tend to lean toward this being trans guy but i won't argue with your interpretation unless you're being transphobic

6. Callisto

Now greece was very misogynistic and had a high emphasis on manly men. that's why in greek mythology there were so many mlm couples but you can't find shit on wlw there are technically only 2, one of them being the previous one and this one...it's technically not wlw it's awful it's evil but it's all we got

Callisto was a hunter of Artemis who might've been a queer woman. So basically Artemis's hunters say no to the company of men and swear off romance so none of the gods can touch them. But one day Zeus was like "yo Callisto do be looking kinda hot tho" and tried to seduce her even tho Callisto is off limits, he did this by shapeshifting into the Artemis and then called Callisto into a private spot where he raped her and got her pregnant. unfortunately since Callisto is no longer a virgin she had to leave the hunters and i think she got turned into a bear by usually Hera but sometimes Artemis too tired to double check

7. Artemis, Athena, Hestia

Now these lovely ladies are famous for being the only 3 beings Aphrodite(goddess of love) has no power over as they are virgin goddesses who swear to be maidens forever. I tend to see them on the Aroace spectrum.

Artemis was someone who said no to romance and to forever forswear the company of men that could technically be interpreted a few different ways(aka did she like girls? lesbian ace maybe?) I tend to lean toward no she appears more aroace as she had nada in the relationships department(no she never loved orion i'm tired of answering that question)

Athena is pretty specifically aroace as its very much explicit that she has no time for romance and prefers to spend her time on battle strategy and crafts. She is called Athena Parthenos* virgin athena for a reason. I heard her childhood best friend pallas was her woman lover from a random internet person but i can't find any sources for this so take that with a grain of salt but it could be that sources are hard to come by for ancient civilizations idk so she could be biromantic ace maybe????

Hestia is def aroace but also we have very little sources of any kind about her. only about her worship no myths. which is sad as fuck because she's a dope goddess i wish there was more about her

*I just realized i forgot to do achilles and patroclus but i was just so tired, i'll do them in the part 2

[a-flickering-soul]

EverymanHYBRID And Deer In Media: In Five Parts (click for individual comparisons)

Deer are both a symbol of fragile purity and the untamable wild–here, we examine deer in the context of man, where deer come to represent the urge within us to abandon the conscious ego for the subconscious id. The deer is a symbol, too, of rebirth, of transformation, of shedding and regrowing its weapons each year. To kill, to be reborn, to choose to be monstrous through our proximity to humanity. Is there not something pure in surrendering to animal instinct? If deer are the twin themes of innocence and wildness, then we in turn are the juxtaposition of humanity and monstrousness–our actions made monstrous by the attempt to temper them with humanity.

(transcript, analysis, and sources below cut)

1: The Secret History & EverymanHYBRID--Bodies

The Secret History, on the killing of a man in a hallucinatory bacchanal:

"'Henry,' I said at last. 'Good God.' "He raised an eyebrow. 'Really, it was more upsetting than you can realize,' he said. 'Once I hit a deer with my car. It was a beautiful creature and to see it struggling, blood everywhere, legs broken ... And this was even more distressing but at least I thought it was over. I never dreamed we'd hear anything else about it.'"

EverymanHYBRID, "Ryan and the SEVENTRIALSOFHABIT":

A shot of a deer's dead body at the side of the road at night, looking crumpled and not quite right. The captions read: "Jeff: It's a fucking deer, dude. (Evan: See it?) Yeah. Something cut its belly open. (Evan: It cut its belly open the wrong way.)"

Parallels drawn:

Consider this one an amuse-bouche. Henry draws comparisons between a man he killed to a deer he accidentally hit with a car, mildly naming the incident ‘distressing’. There is a lack of human empathy, of guilt over killing a fellow man. In comparison, Jeff, Evan, and Vinnie at this point in the EMH plotline have not yet become hunter or hunted–they have not yet been warped by their roles in this iteration and can acknowledge the upsetting nature of the events that befall them. Henry has tasted that amoral nature and is less human for it, more visibly willing to shed that veneer of attempting to care about other people. Jeff, Evan, and Vinnie have not yet reached that point.

2: “Whoso List to Hunt”, EverymanHYBRID, and The Secret History--The Chase

"Whoso List to Hunt", on hunting a fabled white hind:

"I am of them that farthest cometh behind./ Yet may I by no means my wearied mind/ Draw from the deer, but as she fleeth afore/ Fainting I follow. I leave off therefore,/ Sithens in a net I seek to hold the wind./ Who list her hunt, I put him out of doubt,/ As well as I may spend his time in vain. And graven with diamonds in letters plain/ There is written, her fair neck round about:/ Noli me tangere, for Caesar's I am,/ and wild to hold, though I seem tame."

EverymanHYBRID, "Slushpops and Surprises”

A shot of white text on a black page, "[Enter the tragic hero and his unattainable companion.]"

The Secret History, on hallucinations experienced during the bacchanal (bold for emphasis):

“‘Camilla said that during part of it, she’d believed she was a deer; and that was odd, too, because the rest of us remember chasing a deer through the woods, for miles it seemed. Actually it was miles. I know that for a fact. Apparently we ran and ran and ran, because when we came to ourselves we had no idea where we were.’”

EverymanHYBRID, “December & early January”:

A shot of Vinnie, hand covering his face in shock, as he sits and listens to Jessa’s last voicemail before she went missing. Jeff can be seen in the background, listening in silence. The captions read “[Jessa’s voice, recorded]: Steph, that thing you were talking about, I saw it...he’s real, he’s right here. What the hell does he want? I think he’s following me.”

Parallels drawn:

The deer symbolizes wild nature, something that man cannot obtain, touch, or capture without abandoning something of his own humanity. Similarly, deer represent the unattainable prey. Noli me tangere, says Caesar’s unattainable deer– touch me not, no matter how hard you may attempt to catch me. Jessa of EMH is deemed the unattainable companion and Jeff’s driving force to discover the truth behind the situation they’ve been placed in–it is Jessa, dangled in front of him after she goes missing, that leads Jeff down the path that inevitably leads to his own death after uncovering too much. The deer is to be chased, to be hunted, and never captured. Camilla from The Secret History believed herself to be a deer during the same hallucinatory bacchanal that cost a man his life, and led her brother and friends on a chase spanning miles. Jessa was hunted by an unknowable force, then used as bait to draw her partner down the path to his own death. Unattainability, the shape of something fleeing in front of you, elicits a powerful reaction to follow, to hunt, to chase. Jessa fell victim to that reaction. Camilla, and the white hind, did not.

3: The Myth of Diana and Actaeon, EverymanHYBRID, and The Secret History--Madness

The Diana and Actaeon Fountain at the Caserta Royal Palace:

The detail of the fountain shown depicts the pivotal scene in the myth of Actaeon and Artemis, where Actaeon, mid-transformation into a stag, is killed for the slight of viewing the goddess Artemis nude.The sculpture shows the transformation in no mercy, plain in its depiction of Actaeon’s pain and terror, and the simple ferocity of the hounds that surround him.

EverymanHYBRID, “May & June”:

A shot of Jeff, blood spattered across him, speaking with a shocked and angry tone. The captions read, “Jeff: Why were we doing that? That was...that’s not what we were looking for. We knew damned well that wasn’t what we were trying to kill. (Vince: Close enough.) It was a deer! It was a fucking deer! I tried to pull you off, you tried to punch me in the fucking face!”

The Secret History, on the Greeks’ view of beauty and terror (bold for emphasis):

“Beauty is terror. Whatever we call beautiful, we quiver before it. And what could be more terrifying and beautiful to souls like the Greeks or to our own, than to lose control completely? To throw off the chains of being for an instant, to shatter the accident of our mortal selves? Euripedes speaks of the Maenads: head thrown back, throat to the stars, ‘more like deer than human being’.”

Parallels drawn:

Most depictions of Actaeon, sculpture or painting, usually show him with antlers or a deer lower body, leaving his head and face a recognizable human shape. However, the sculptor here decided to subvert expectations and leave his body human, giving Actaeon the animal head of a stag. The loss of control and the descent from human to animal is not glorified or made palatable by the mere addition of a crown of antlers--there is only the one constant, fear, that follows him all the way down. Madness may be defined as a loss of control, and there may be something beautiful and terrifying in feeling your sanity slip through your own fingers. Jeff, Evan, and Vinnie are overtaken by brief, inexplicable madness and tear apart a deer as they come dangerously close to uncovering exactly who and what is hunting them. They skate close to seeing soemthing they shouldn't see. It is only Jeff who looks up, shocked by the blood on his hands, and voices his fear. Vinnie, apathetic, lets it go. But Evan, houndlike and irrational, defends his kill.

4: EverymanHYBRID & Hannibal--Warnings and Temptation

EverymanHYBRID, “May & June”:

A shot of Evan, spattered heavily with blood, standing with shoulders caved in protectively. His left hand is raised to his mouth, with his hair covering his eyes, and he is licking the blood off of his fingers.

“Shot Through The Hart, and Hannibal’s To Blame” (bold for emphasis):

“In my post about ravens, I talked about how it’s not always easy to tell what the Ravenstag really means. Is it evidence of the Hannibalesque elements of Will’s soul? Or a warning of those parts growing within him? Does the Ravenstag urge Will forward on his journey, or warn him of what’s to come?”

Hannibal, Season 1, Episode 1 “Aperitif”:

A shot of the Ravenstag, staring directly into the camera with one hoof up, as if to approach. There are black feathers interwoven with its pelt and its eyes have an uncanny shine.

Parallels drawn:

On a naturalistic note, deer are skittish creatures. They have thin legs and a sleek body, made for running. A small head and big eyes, placed wide-set to see coming predators. Keen ears. They are ready at any moment to sense danger, warn others, and flee. When a deer does not move, it is either safe or sizing up its options, either accepting where it is or preparing to run. Deer, staring directly at the viewer, come as a sympathetic warning to flee or, in its dark eyes and firm stance, a temptation. Me tangere, they say. Come closer. We are one and the same. In Bryan Fuller’s Hannibal, the commanding presence of the Ravenstag serves as both a warning and a beckoning temptation to turn his feet down the darker path. It is otherworldly, black-furred and feathered, and yet a warning of events rooted in the real world--does Will understand what danger he is in upon meeting Hannibal and take the warning, or will he ignore it, sensing that same darkness in himself, that same potential for corruption? In EverymanHYBRID, it is that same killing of a deer that hints at that same potential for darkness growing inside Evan. He licks at his fingers, animalistic, fully ignoring his own Ravenstag warning signs for the delight of the hunt. Is he Evan anymore? Or is something else growing inside him?

5: EverymanHYBRID & Hannibal--Predator and Prey, or the Final Act

EverymanHybrid, “:D”:

A shot of HABIT, looking up a set of stairs with one foot on the bottom step. In one hand down by his side, he is holding a knife. His posture is tilted forward, poised, ready to spring into action, like that of a hunter.

“Shot Through The Hart, and Hannibal’s To Blame” (bold for emphasis):

“The idea of deer as symbols of rebirth also stands out to me. Hannibal is a series obsessed with becoming and transformation. People start one way, and are reborn as something completely other by the end of the show. There’s even a character sewn up into a deceased pregnant horse in the hopes that when she’s released, she will be literally reborn as something different. It’s thus a neat fit, this significance of deer with the themes of the show.”

EverymanHYBRID, “:D”:

A shot of Jeff, looking up and to the side with an expression of caution and fear. His eyes are unnerved, squinting as, from offscreen, HABIT’s hand plays idly with his hat.

Parallels drawn:

The first and final incarnation of the deer is, of course, prey. Beyond and before any symbolism of innocence and wildness and warnings, deer are prey animals, to be hunted and devoured. And yet, in keeping with the concept of contrasting symbolism, deer are not helpless. Yearly, they shed and regrow their antlers in a transformation of horn and blood. At the climax of EverymanHYBRID, the final reveal, the final transformation, comes to fruition. HABIT, formerly Evan, takes its place as the Hunter, the archetypal predator, with Jeff shown most prominently as the Prey. Jeff’s luck has run its course, with him in the chair as the sacrificial prey-victim to fall to HABIT’s knife. HABIT, reborn, reiterated, made incarnate through Evan’s unwilling transformation, is poised to start the hunt. This is the big reveal, the crux of the transformation, Actaeon caught mid-transfiguration and the bloody sloughing-off of velvet humanity to reveal perfect and gleaming antlers. This is what it comes down to, time and time again. The hunter and the hunted. The wilderness embraced and the wilderness captured, and the monstrosity in that act.

Works Cited

Callimachus. Actaeon and Artemis. C. 220 BC

Fuller, Bryan. “Apetirif.” Hannibal, season 1, episode 1, NBC, 4 Apr. 2013.

Koval, J., Caffarello, V., &; Jennings, E. (Directors). (2011, July 12). May & June [Video file].

Koval, J., Caffarello, V., &; Jennings, E. (Directors). (2012, October 9). :D [Video file].

Tartt, Donna. The Secret History. Penguin, 2006.

Uhminuh. “Shot Through the Hart, and Hannibal's to Blame.” Read the Rude, Wordpress, 19 July 2020.

Wyatt, Thomas. “Whoso List to Hunt, I Know where is an Hind.” c. 1530.

Honorary mention to this fanart by @/rrhaes that started this whole spiral

[celestialmazer]

Julie Mehretu, Untitled 2, 1999. Private collection. Courtesy of White Cube. © Julie Mehretu

Julie Mehretu, Hineni (E. 3:4), 2018. Centre Pompidou, Paris, Musée national d’art moderne/Centre de création industrielle; gift of George Economou, 2019. © Julie Mehretu. Photography:Tom Powel Imaging

Julie Mehretu, Mind-Wind Field Drawings (quarantine studio, d.h.) #1, 2019-2020. Private collection, courtesy Marian Goodman Gallery New York/Paris. © Julie Mehretu. Photography courtesy Marian Goodman Gallery

Julie Mehretu, Mogamma (A Painting in Four Parts) Part 1, 2012. Guggenheim Abu Dhabi. © Julie Mehretu. Photography: White Cube, Ben Westoby

Julie Mehretu, Conjured Parts (eye), Ferguson, 2016. The Broad Art Foundation, Los Angeles. © Julie Mehretu. Photography: Cathy Carver

Julie Mehretu, Migration Direction Map (large), 1996. Private collection. © Julie Mehretu. Photography: Tom Powel Imaging

At home with artist Julie Mehretu

CAMILLE OKHIO - 25 MAR 2021

Julie Mehretu speaks with the joy and conviction of someone who has had the freedom to investigate all their interests. Curiosity has led her to the myriad topics, objects and moments that inform her work, among them cartography, archaeology, the birth of civilisation and mycology. Since the 1990s, her practice has expanded outwardly in all directions like a spider web. A lack of understanding and preconceived notions among reviewers have often led to her work being flattened – simplified so that it is easily digestible – but in reality, her work is far from a simplistic investigation of any one topic. It encompasses multitudes.

The artist’s recent paintings are mostly large scale, but her early works on paper (often created with multiple layers – one sheet of Mylar on top of another) are as small as a six-inch square. The works often comprise innumerable minuscule markings – tremendous force and knowledge communicated through delicate inkings and streaks. Their layers reveal, rather than obfuscate. And though Mehretu’s creative process springs from a desire to understand herself better, the work itself is in no way autobiographical. 

Born in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, on the tails of a continental rejection of colonialism, and raised there, then in Michigan, Mehretu has a flexible and full-hearted understanding of home. It is not one physical place, but many, all holding equal importance. On 25 March, Mehretu will present her first major retrospective at the Whitney Museum of American Art, with works spanning 1996 to 2019. The institution is an important one for Mehretu, as it played host to several pivotal shows in her youth.

Her exhibition has served as an impetus for Mehretu to look back at her already prolific career, observing and organising the thoughts, questions and answers she has put forth for over two decades. The six years it took to bring this exhibition together proved an incredibly valuable time of reflection, fatefully dovetailing with a year of quarantine. 

Wallpaper*: Where are you as we speak?

Julie Mehretu: I’m in my studio on 26th Street, right on the West Side Highway. I’ve worked here for 11 years.

W*: Are there any artists, writers or thinkers that have had a meaningful impact on you?

JM: I don’t know how to answer that because there are literally so many! It’s constantly changing. Right now, Kara Walker, David Hammons, William Pope.L, and younger artists like Jason Moran (who has made amazing work around abstraction). There are so many artists that have been informative and important to me: Frank Bowling, Jack Whitten, Caravaggio.

I also look at a lot of prehistoric work, from as far back as 60,000 years ago, as well as cave paintings from 6th century China and early prehistoric drawings in the caves of Australia. 

W*: What’s the most interesting thing you have read, watched or listened to recently?

JM: For the last few weeks I’ve been immersed in Steve McQueen films. I’ve been bingeing on lovers rock music. And a TV show that really moved me was [Michaela Cole’s] I May Destroy You. It’s difficult, but it was really well done and powerful. 

Ocean Vuong’s novel On Earth We Are Briefly Gorgeous is amazing. The Mushroom at the End of the World by Anna Lowenhaupt Tsing is a really incredible book too – she studies this mushroom that became a delicacy in Japan in the 7th century. It started growing in deforested areas – it’s in these places destroyed by human beings that these mushrooms survive. [I find it interesting] that this mushroom grows on the edge of precarity and destruction. Like with Black folks, there is a constant aspect of insisting on yourself and reinventing yourself in the midst of constant effort of destruction. 

W*: What was the first piece of art you remember seeing? How did you feel about it?

JM: One of the first times I remember being moved by a work of art was looking through my mother’s Rembrandt book. We brought so few things back from Ethiopia and that was one of them. [Particularly] Rembrandt’s The Sacrifice of Isaac. That story is so intense. I was so moved by the light and the skin and the way the paint made light and skin. 

W*: Do you travel? If so, what does travel afford you, and what have you missed about it during Covid-19?

JM: I travel a lot, but I haven’t travelled this year. There has been this amazing sense of suspension and a pause in that. I miss travelling, but going to look at art, watching films, reading novels and listening to music is the way I travel now. For instance, I’ve been listening to Afro-Peruvian music and now I want to go to Peru.

Before I know it we will be back in this fast-paced, zooming-around environment – there is something I want to savour by staying here, now, in this time and absorbing as much as I can.

W*: You are said to have a vast collection of objects and images. Walk me through your collection – what areas, materials, makers and things have the largest presence and why?

JM: When you enter our home there is this long hallway. Framed along the wall we have around 20 fluorescent Daniel Joseph Martinez block-printed posters he made with words – almost poems. Our kids grew up reading those. One says ‘Sometimes I can’t breathe’ and another one says ‘Don’t work’, while some are really long.

We also have a great Paul Pfeiffer photograph of one from the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse series. We have a group of Richard Tuttle etchings right over our dining table. We have an amazing David Hammons body print as well, and my kids’ work is all over the house.

W*: As the daughter of immigrants and an immigrant yourself – how do you conceptualise home and how do you create it?

JM: There were a lot of times I felt very transient – as a student and a young adult, going in and out of school and residency programmes. It always came back to music and food. There are certain flavours, foods, music, smells that you take wherever you go. Also as a mother, I’m building a home for my children. Home becomes something else because of them. They are the core of home now. 

W* How has motherhood affected your practice?

JM: I became much more productive when I had kids for several reasons – one is that I felt a lot of pressure to make [work] in the time I wasn’t with them, which of course is unsustainable. A large part of making is not making – thinking and searching. 

When I got to work I could get into it much more quickly. Kids grow and change so fast, you feel time is passing so you need to use it. I wasn’t going to stop working, that’s for sure. All women who are pushing in their lives make that choice. 

W*: What is your favourite myth and why does it hold importance for you?

JM: Right now I’m reading Greek myths to my ten-year-old. We’ve read them before, but he wanted to read them again. I still read to him at night even though he’s a voracious reader himself.

The myths I remember the most are myths I’ve come across in visual works. Titian’s Diana and Actaeon – I know that myth so well because of his painting. Bernini’s mesmerising sculpture of Apollo and Daphne I saw in Rome, where her body becomes a tree. The leaves are so delicately carved into the marble, it’s a work of incredible beauty. I’ve been considering this deconstructionist approach to mythology. Storytelling becomes this place to interrogate propositions, which is what I think mythology does.

W*: Have you experienced a flattening of your work?

JM: I’m always concerned with flattening and pigeonholing. That is something that happens to artists like us all the time. When I first was working and showing there was a bit of that happening with my work. It was put into the space of cartography or an architectural analysis of it. It was said to be autobiographical work.

The art world tries to consume. There is this desire to flatten and the desire for Black artists to be a reflection of their experience. I don’t think any artist is like that at all. In reality, none of us are flat. We all contain multitudes and are complicated – that has always been the core of the Black radical tradition.

[andthebubbles]

okay kinda related to this post

(+ snowrunner and wot rambles)

I was thinking about this today when I was very sleepy and rewatching PotC, which I’ve watched probably around 30 times by now, the majority of it when it came out on DVD. Like I think I watched it 25ish times (27? can’t remember but I did count and I did used to remember lol) after the initial watch, in the space of a few months probably

ANYWAY and I think certain media(?)/things leave an impact on you and it carries through to what you write?? Like omfg I was watching PotC today and it hit me that the ‘shifting’/hidden loyalties thing re Jack Sparrow literally translates across to Seb/Oskar in sebis fic

(I think Galax-Arena was another formative sort of thing I consumed; I guess I owe the darker stuff in my writing to that book.)

But yeah, not only did PotC probably influence my writing but also, being a pretty impressionable 14 y/o when I was watching PotC on repeat, I did sort of attempt to absorb some of Jack Sparrow’s personality/mannerisms LOL. I did it too with the Lion King (II) which I watched a tonne of times when I got it on video. And probably I did it with Justin from the Rats of NIMH too. And with Star Wars I had (hopeful) Jedi ideas~ lmao. I guess everyone tries to incorporate their favourite characters into their personality.

Other random unrelated stuff cause I feel like rambling:

SNOWRUNNER UPDATE. YAS. 

I just got the Voron Grad though and I’m a little bit disappointed? I like trucks that can have a loading crane, a flatbed/sideboard bed AND pull a trailer. Like, that is the holy grail... That’s why I love the Voron D-blahblahnumbers so much, although the engine/torque(?) was rather lacking on the new Wisconsin map. Idk why. But people have noticed that maybe the new update made cargo heavier, which makes it harder for the trucks to go along at a good speed--or even any speed at all lol

I rather like the Tuz Actaeon!! It’s smol and cute

The fine-tune gearbox is pretty good, but delicate. I’m not sure yet if it’s all that better than the standard low-/low/low+ gearbox, but we’ll see. Most of my trucks don’t even have the 3 low gears yet because that upgrade is on one of the further-away Michigan maps and since I had to restart the game, I haven’t gotten there yet (I went to Alaska and Taymyr more this time, whereas the first time I played this game I did more of Michigan)

TONKS: 

I really need to play it 😂 I was gonna take advantage of the ~on track to the AMX 13 105 but ...

.....................

I have a lot of camo-acquiring playing to do, so I should get round to it soon... whenever I can figure out which team is gonna win for the latest event. lol

Also kinda stressing out about ~entering a battle in a platoon -mission to get that starry night camo 😍 like do we have to already be in a toon when we enter the battle, or can we just make a toon during the countdown 😭

[xxsovereignsarayaxx]

Supernatural - Road to Revenge Chapter 5

Authors Note: I want to thank my darling @evilispretty-dead for helping me finish this chapter and reassuring me that it wasn't a load of crap. As always if you want to be tagged to keep up to date with the series let me know or is you have a request pop me an ask. After spending some time on this chapter I really do like this one and it might have been my favourite so far to write.

Word Count: 3234

Warnings: Blood, Torture, Implied Sex, Angry Dean.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4

“Well, well, well.” Said the unknown voice.

It’s true when they say that once one of your senses is removed, your other remaining ones are heightened. All I could see was darkness but that was because I had something covering my face, a bag or blindfold perhaps. But the room itself was cold and had wooden floorboards judging by the creeks it made when I shifted about in the chair that bound me. The odd bit of breeze passed me as I presumed my captor circled me like a bit of prey. 

“I heard you were looking for me, but looks like I found you first. I’m Actaeon but you already knew that. You don’t seem to be wanting to put up much of a fight, it's a shame really. Your sister Nia was it? She was much more entertaining.” The voice continued in a sickerning tone. I could feel the breath right in front of my face.

“Well being trained by ‘The Men of Letters’ we were taught many things, being captured by demons happened to be on the teaching itenary. Just in time before the summer holidays.” I sassed back. 

The object covering my eyes was ripped off, the thin piece of fabric fluttered to the floor, this was the first time I had looked my captor in their eyes. Making sure to steady my breathing I didn’t want him to think that I was scared, to think that I was weak. That I knew I was not. My eyes quickly darted to parts of the room. Even though it was dark I could see the faint trickle of light coming through the door frame. I tried to twist my bound wrists but to no avail. 

“Now, now little one, it is a shame really though. I saw what you were becoming all those years ago. Cold and heartless ready to take a life when you were told to. Pity that once you fell into the clutches of John Winchester and his boys you gained the one thing I despise.”

“And what would that be?” I asked.

“Compassion.” Actaeon sneered, walking towards a table covered by the shadows. He picked up something I couldn’t see what it was but I knew that he wanted to inflict some form of pain. 

Actaeon held the knife close to my features. “You had so much potential and you wasted it all. I’m disappointed Nicole I really am.”

I shuddered slightly. “I killed your kind! Demons, monsters and ghosts you name it I was sent to kill it.” I spat.

“And who do you think helped give the locations of some of those cases you had? I needed someone to hunt down certain people so I could get a higher position in hell.”

“Yet it was Crowley who helped me track you down. He wants you gone. What was it he said to me? Oh yeah...Bad boys get punished...” I said trying to struggle away from the knife. 

“But look at the predicament you're in, a knife to your throat. No way out and even if you free yourself of your bounds you don’t stand a chance against me. But aren't you curious why I murdered your sister?” 

“I’m not stupid Actaeon you want to bait me. So I lose my temper, so you have the upper hand, you want me to cloud my judgement with my emotions. Even though it pains me to say this, Nia was an easy opportunity; she was a simple throwaway toy for you. But with her you could also kill two birds with one stone. Yes you wanted the scroll from the painting but the thing you wanted more was me. You wanted me to suffer because I killed your love. Cecilia. She was my first demon kill and what you hated the most was the fact I was just a child.” I replied to him. My voice was strong and dominating. I showed no weaknesses towards him.

“So you do remember then?” Actaeon asked me, bending down to my eye level.

“I always remember.”

Night was always the easiest to work, there were always less people about which meant less witnesses. As I ran at full speed through a puddle water droplets splashed on my face I turned the corner and I knew that my trap had worked. I clutched my angel blade in my right hand and the remains of some holy water in my left. 

“Chirsto.” I shouted and the demon fell to her knees. She looked in pain and blond curls fell over her face. 

“P-please don’t” She begged.

“You are a demon...Demons don’t deserve to live. You have taken the lives of so many people but it is ironic that you will die by my hand. A child’s hand no less.” 

I stepped closer so that I was literally inches away. I splashed the remaining water I had on the face of the demon. She screamed in agony. 

I screamed in agony, something that I was now sharing with my first kill. The knife Actaeon held moved upwards to my cheek and he dragged it down towards my neck and past my collarbone. The knife was cold as the metal touched my skin but as the blade tore through me it brought me back to reality.

“Now this is getting me excited, little one.” Actaeon said breaking the torture he lifted the knife to his lips licking the blood that dripped off the edge of the blade.

“Just do what you want to me, get it over with. You’ve killed my family and Dean and Sam? They won’t miss me when I’ve gone.” I said sheepishly. Whatever confidence I had before melted away I knew deep down I wasn’t going to leave alive. 

Actaeon continued the assault. My clothes had been torn and now covered in blood. My face, neck, torso and arms were littered in cuts. I was now nothing more than a shell of my previous self. Hell bent on revenge. And what I told Dean in the past. And when he repeated my own words to me I knew he was right.

With each cut I cried out for help.

“Revenge is a dangerous road to go down Dean! Your head gets filled with emotions and then your judgement is clouded, you don’t think straight and then that's when you get reckless. Trust me I know.” 

Recalling another memory I hung my head in shame. I knew I wasn’t the person ‘The Men of Letters’ tried to mould me to be. I was my own person. I forged my own path thanks to learning the Winchester way. You look out for those who you love. Because a wise salty hunter with a phobia of salad and lover of bullets, booze and bacon once told me that family, don’t end in blood. But it doesn’t start there either. Family cares about you, not what you can do for them, family’s there for the good the bad all of it. They got your back even when it hurts.

“Come now little one, the fun is just beginning. Now where to find your anti-possession tattoo. Shall you tell me or am I going to have to just rip every single piece of clothing from your body to find it?” Actaeon said breaking my train of thought. 

I struggled once more on my bindings, I made a mistake going after Nia’s killer alone. I needed my family. I needed Dean. Actaeon grabbed my chin tightly. “So you finally want to plead for your life?” 

“My name is Nicole Marie Williams and today isn’t my time to die.” I shouted and kicked Actaeon in between his legs. He might be a demon but even demons felt that. My blow caused him to fall to a knee and I used that time to try and wiggle free. Fresh rope burns went over the older ones but all of a sudden the door to the room flew open and two figures stepped through. 

“You’ve been a very bad boy…” Crowley says dripping with sarcasm. 

Within seconds a blast sent Actaeon across the room and pinned to a nearby wall. 

“Shall I end him Fergus?” Said the ginger haired witch I loved but hated at the same time.

“Not today mother that job belongs to Fawn here.” Crowley says slicing through the rope with his angel blade. As I shrugged out of the bindings I picked myself up, I wobbled a little and my head swam because of the blood loss from my injuries but I took the blade from Crowley and made my way over to the demon pinned by magic. 

“I can see the look in your eyes, you're scared. Now you know some of the pain my sister felt and all of the others you have murdered for sport. I hope you get what you deserve you son of a bitch!” And with that I plunged the blade into his heart. The magic that once held him vanished and his body dropped to the floor in a heap . I turned to face Crowley and Rowena.

“Thank you…” I whispered to them. 

“Well I suppose you should get back to your boys, I mean I sent them halfway across the country. Their worried sick Nicole dear.”

“I know I have a lot of making up to do, but I want to make us even.” I said as I bent down and searched for the scroll in the fallen demons pockets.

“This should make us even.” I told the demon and witch as I handed the scroll that started the whole ordeal.

“Is that...The souls of Gabriel?” Rowena asked with her thick scottish accent. 

“That mother it is.” 

“Nicole dear, I sent Dean and Sam to Oregon two days ago. If you leave now you might make it back before them.” 

I nodded my head slowly and with a small smile I handed Crowley his blade and left the building. 

The drive back to Kansas was long and grueling, I had no idea what to say to Sam nor Dean but I knew I had to come up with something. We were a family and with my actions I felt I had almost destroyed it. When I got back to the bunker I needed to patch myself up. I needed several stitches for the wounds that Actaeon had inflicted but the one thing that I had set my mind to. Cas would not be healing me, each scratch, each mark I will be remembering and if I would be left with scars then so be it. 

I pulled into the bunker late in the evening, I remember leaving where I was being held at night but I felt like I had something stuck in my throat as I saw the Impala parked in the drive. My muscles ached from everything I had been through. 

As I heaved myself from the old battered car I had ‘borrowed’ I made my way to the door. I supported my right arm with my left hand due to the deep wound. But I just stood there looking at the door handle. I was nervous...No petrified was more like it. My breathing intensified and I started to sweat and my body shook in fear. I had no idea what was happening to me but I wanted it to stop. I felt tears leak from my eyes and they made my face sting as the droplets rolled into some of the cuts on my face. With a shaky hand I reached for the handle and opened the heavy metal door. I felt like bambi on ice as I took small steps and carefully took to the stairs. I looked down to see both brothers stare at me in pure horror…

“It’s done…” I muttered as I took the last final steps to the ground. Dean had gotten up from his seat and left leaving me with Sam.

“Nik what happened?” He asked, guiding my frail body to the chairs in the library.

“What needed to be done, Actaeon is gone.” I whispered, not looking at Sam. 

I sat in silence as Sam started to patch me up, I felt the burn of the rubbing alcohol as he cleaned each one of my wounds. I felt each time the needle went in and out of my skin. But I refused to mutter a word. In the past I had been shot at, stabbed but this time I felt more pain than anything else I had experienced. 

About twenty minutes had passed and Sam had finally finished the last stitch, he tried to get some small talk out of me but I stayed silent. I looked down seeing the vast amount of bandages on my arms and the large one on my collarbone and neck. Stretching my arms I looked up seeing Sam place the unused first aid items away and throwing the used wipes and wrappers in the bin. He looked at me offering a small smile. 

“Nik, it’s ok please talk to me.” He offered as he tried to reassure me.  

I opened my mouth but then shut it just as quickly. I looked down at the floor. 

“How bad is it?” I asked softly.

“Dean’s...He...He’s angry Nik. He’s angry that you left him to deal with this on your own. That whatever was in your past you felt the need to keep from us. That you don’t trust us enough to know what happened.” Sam responded.

“What about you? How do you feel?” I whispered.

“I kept the thing about ‘The Book of the Damned’ a secret so we’re even but you never hide things away from my brother Nik, he is also pissed that you punched him.” Sam said ending his sentence with a chuckle.

“I didn’t want Actaeon to use Dean or me as leverage for one another, but I also didn’t want Dean finding out who I really was all those years ago. I thought it would scare him.” I said honestly.

“Speaking of that, what did you mean when you told Dean about running away from your old home?” Sam asked hoping you would speak to him.

“Let me get things right with Dean and I’ll tell you both everything. I promise.” I murmured 

Sam nodded. I got up from the chair and steadily headed down the hallway. Using the walls to steady myself so I wouldn’t fall. I stood in front of our bedroom door and I paused for a moment. I felt the rush of the nervousness and fear once more. With a shaky hand, I knocked on the door softly with my knuckle. Then I reached for the golden doorknob and opened the door slowly. I saw Dean sat at the edge of the bed hunched over resting his forearms on his knees. He didn’t acknowledge me as I entered the room. Cautiously walking over I sat next to him. Feeling the shift in the mattress as I sat he immediately got up heading over to the desk in the room.

“What the hell was that?” Dean asked with a growl.

“WHAT WAS THAT?!?!” Dean shouted.

“I didn’t want you getting hurt.” I started letting out a shaky breath. We didn’t argue like this often. And I knew that a storm was brewing.

“I thought you trusted me? I thought we were partners?” Still keeping his voice raised.

“We are.” I attempted.

“Really? Then why did I wake up with a killer headache, flat tyres and you missing only to see one of your guns next to me and your phone smashed to bits.” 

“I had too! I...I...I...I didn’t want Actaeon using either one of us as bait for each other, he relied on emotions but I didn’t want you seeing what I was doing, I didn’t want you to see me stoop so low. Yes I made a mistake doing it alone and I released it far too late. At one point I thought I was going to die. But the reason why Nia was killed in the first place was because of me! I wanted to try and right a wrong. You of anybody should understand that. I could have made a demon deal, I could have tried magic to bring her back but I’m not you or Sam...I’m not that lucky. But what about the times when you left Sam to do your crusading. The times you left both of us even though we agreed to do it together….”

“That was different Nik and you know it!” Dean interrupted.

“How is it? How was it different?” I pleaded.

Dean just looked at me dead in the eyes. I could tell he wanted to object to what I just said but he couldn’t, from looking at him I saw how tired his eyes were, that he hadn’t had a shave in days, the stubble appearing on his jawline and features. 

“What I did was no different to what you would have done, we’re so alike and at times it's scary but it’s what makes us work! But now that this has happened and that my past is out there coming to get me I need to be honest with you and your brother and I’m going to tell you it all, yes I’m frightened by this and I’m scared at the fact you both might push me away but I also know either of you won’t do that because we’re a family. But I want us to be good before I do that. I am so sorry that I left you in the middle of nowhere, I’m sorry that you had to resort to asking Rowena for help.”

“You saw me when I was a demon Nik, you saw what I was. Hell I tried to kill you and Sam that day in this place. And yet you still loved me. You still cared. Whatever your past is it can’t be any worse than that.” Dean said softly, tears welling up in his eyes. 

“At times I think that it is.” I said softly getting up from the bed moving to Dean’s side. 

“Look what he did to you.” His fingers ghosting over the bandages.

“Head to the library I’ll meet you there, I just need to get something first.” I told him planting a kiss to his stubbly cheek and made a move to the door. But I was stopped in my tracks. 

Dean grabbed a hold of my wrist and pulled me to him, I let out an excited breath before I was then devoured with kiss after kiss. I ran my fingers through his hair and tugged on a few of the strands, Dean span round and lifted me onto his hip moving backwards to pin me against the wall, his lips moved to the exposed parts of skin on my neck planting small kisses up and down my neck and left side of my collarbone. Using his much larger hands he brought my arms just above my head and held onto them, the action hurt but in a good way and Dean knew it. I was feeling on top of the world right now thanks to the mix of dopamine, oxytocin and painkillers.

“Sam can wait…” Dean breathed.

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

373 of 2022

GODS: Life Zeus: What’s your name or nickname? Joeri. Hera: Where are you from? West Flanders, Belgium. Athena: How old are you? I'm 32. Hephaestus: When is your birthday? Every year. Aphrodite: What’s your relationship status? Married. Poseidon: What are your pronouns? I'm male, so he/him by default. Dionysus: Are you and extrovert or an introvert? Ambivert for sure. Demeter: Do you have any pets? Two cats. Apollo: What kind of music are you into? Metal (particularly djent and sludge etc.) and hip hop. Artemis: What do you first notice about new people? Eyes. Hades: What’s a big fear of yours? Failure and losing. Ares: What’s a big pet peeve of yours? People who interrupt others. Hestia: Where do you consider home? My hometown. CREATURES: Lasts Pegasus: Last movie you watched? I don't watch movies. Mermaid: Last tv show you finished? Inside the World's Toughest Prisons. Centaur: Last book you read? The Legend of Ice People. Siren: Last song you listened to? Juli - Warum. Gorgon: Last thing you ate? Croque-monsieur. Too high in calories lol. Cyclops: Last time you cried? 30 years ago or something? I don't cry. Minotaur: Last time you were truly happy? 21 September. Meet up with my friends. Sphynx: Last text you sent? I don't remember. Chimera: Last call you made? Probably the disability service. Griffin: Last thing you did before going to sleep last night? Snuggled with my husband. Nymph: Last dream you remember? A nightmare I'd rather forget. Satyr: Last time you couldn’t stop laughing? Probably today. HEROES: Experiences Heracles: Have you ever had a dream come true? Yeah, more than one. Theseus: What is your worst regret? I don't have regrets. It's pointless. Perseus: Have you ever been arrested? No, never. Cadmus: Have you ever had your heart broken? Yeah, once. Achilles: Have you ever had to be hospitalized? Yes, I had a brain surgery. Actaeon: Tell about a memory you wish to forget. Health-related things and sexual abuse. Bellerophon: Have you ever passed out? More than once. Agamemnon: What is an achievement you’re proud of? I started walking again after being paralysed. Oedipus: Have you ever been in love? Twice. I loved, but was it being in love? I don't know. Jason: Have you ever travelled abroad? Where? Yes. Wallonia in Belgium (it's like a whole different country to me XD), France, the Netherlands, Germany, Denmark and Poland. Atlanta: Have you ever stood up for someone else? More than once. I'm quite known for it. Hippolytus: Tell an experience you will never forget. Summers at the beach where I was raised. MAGICAL ITEMS: Favorites Trident: Who are your favorite people? My husband, my friends, my parents, my sister. Lightning Bolt: What are your top three favorite movies? I don't like movies. Sun Chariot: What is your favorite mythological creature? Mermaid, I think. Lyre: What are your top three favorite songs? This question appears everywhere. Caduceus: What is your favorite color? Black and green. Aegis: What is your favorite book or series? I don't really have favourites, I just like books. Scythe: What is your favorite tv show? I don't have favourites. Bident: What is your favorite way to spend free time? Travelling. Harpe: What are your top 3 favorite places? Middelkerke, Bruges and Ghent. Cornucopia: What is your favorite place to eat? Bavet. Winged Sandals: What is your favorite thing to do when you hangout with your friends? Talking a lot and drinking beer. We depend on good communication. Golden Fleece: What is your favorite animal? Cat. PLACES: Goals and Wishes Olympus: Describe your dream job. The same job I've had for the last 9 years. Tartarus: What’s a short term goal you hope to achieve? To overcome my anxiety because it starts manifesting as PTSD symptoms. Underworld: Describe your dream vacation. Road trips, visiting the big cities, staying in hotels. Styx: How would you like your life to look like in 10 years? Happy and stable, with my husband next to me. Athuna: If you could live anywhere in the world for the rest of your life, where would it be? I'd like to stay where I live. Sparta: Do you have a bucket list? If so, what’s on it? I do, mostly about visiting various places in the world. Elysium: If you could have a superpower, what would it be? Teleportation. Ogygia: Describe your dream husband/wife/life partner? The one I'm married to already. Troja: What is the craziest thing you wanna do before you die? Travel around the world. The Labyrinth: Have you ever died and came back to life as a vampire? LMAO.

[maevekerrigan]

GODS: Life

Zeus: What’s your name or nickname? my name is stephanie; nickname is bebe

Hera: Where are you from? 🇺🇸 🇧🇷

Athena: How old are you? 33

Hephaestus: When is your birthday? aug 18

Aphrodite: What’s your relationship status? single, which is what i prefer always

Poseidon: What are your pronouns? she/her

Dionysus: Are you and extrovert or an introvert? introvert

Demeter: Do you have any pets? 3 cats. scout, maxine, and flint

Apollo: What kind of music are you into? all kinds. just depends on my mood

Artemis: What do you first notice about new people? idk

Hades: What’s a big fear of yours? losing my loved ones

Ares: What’s a big pet peeve of yours? people, in general really lol

Hestia: Where do you consider home? my house, in ohio

CREATURES: Lasts

Pegasus: Last movie you watched? a documentary on netflix, inside the mind of a cat

Mermaid: Last tv show you finished? grimm

Centaur: Last book you read? grimm's fairy tales

Siren: Last song you listened to? we don't talk about bruno

Gorgon: Last thing you ate? pasta ❤

Cyclops: Last time you cried? not sure

Minotaur: Last time you were truly happy? this past weekend, while vacationing in tennessee. the cabin we had was so perfect and the view was amazing

Sphynx: Last text you sent? "here" to jordan

Chimera: Last call you made? well my supervisor called me earlier, so i guess that. i pretty much never call anyone. i would rather text

Griffin: Last thing you did before going to sleep last night? snuggled with maxi

Nymph: Last dream you remember? hmm, i think me and jensen were having an affair ?? lmao

Satyr: Last time you couldn’t stop laughing? probably this past weekend too

HEROES: Experiences

Heracles: Have you ever had a dream come true? i think so. my kitties are all dreams that have come true

Theseus: What is your worst regret? unfortunately i have plenty of those

Perseus: Have you ever been arrested? i plead the fifth

Cadmus: Have you ever had your heart broken? yes

Achilles: Have you ever had to be hospitalized? yes

Actaeon: Tell about a memory you wish to forget. no thx

Bellerophon: Have you ever passed out? yea

Agamemnon: What is an achievement you’re proud of? idk really

Oedipus: Have you ever been in love? yes

Jason: Have you ever travelled abroad? Where? brazil

Atlanta: Have you ever stood up for someone else? yes

Hippolytus: Tell an experience you will never forget. the trip to tennessee first comes to mind bc it was so recent

MAGICAL ITEMS: Favorites  

Trident: Who are your favorite people? family

Lightning Bolt: What are your top three favorite movies? i can't pick favorites

Sun Chariot: What is your favorite mythological creature? mermaids & dragons

Lyre: What are your top three favorite songs? i can't choose. it just depends on my mood

Caduceus: What is your favorite color? green

Aegis: What is your favorite book or series? the maeve kerrigan series

Scythe: What is your favorite tv show? black sails, the originals, shadow and bone, etc

Bident: What is your favorite way to spend free time? watch TV and play sims

Harpe: What are your top 3 favorite places? brazil, home, countryside

Cornucopia: What is your favorite place to eat? bonefish grill

Winged Sandals: What is your favorite thing to do when you hangout with your friends? my only friends are my cats, and we play (:

Golden Fleece: What is your favorite animal? cats

PLACES: Goals and Wishes

Olympus: Describe your dream job. to not have to work for a living

Tartarus: What’s a short term goal you hope to achieve? hmm idk

Underworld: Describe your dream vacation. i need to be on a beach

Styx: How would you like your life to look like in 10 years? i want to be filthy rich and live on a farm with all of the kitties

Athuna: If you could live anywhere in the world for the rest of your life, where would it be? somewhere warm

Sparta: Do you have a bucket list? If so, what’s on it? just lots of traveling

Elysium: If you could have a superpower, what would it be? telekinesis

Ogygia: Describe your dream husband/wife/life partner? i don't want one

Troja: What is the craziest thing you wanna do before you die? nothing crazy

The Labyrinth: Have you ever died and came back to life as a vampire? yes of course

Delphi: Are you currently doing anything to pursue your dreams? not really

[liminal-zone]

what r ur top 2 or 3 favorite lines from fics you’ve written. like ones that you go back and reread sometimes because heck are they good

wandering stars, hannibal

The year and place is irrelevant, and Hannibal Lecter is staring at his masterpiece in wonder. 

Abigail Hobbs is alive, blood pumping in her heart and air entering and leaving her lungs. Her hair is brown, is red, is platinum, is long or short. Her face has features similar and dissimilar to the face he remembers in Minnesota. She has shapely calves, and her arms are muscular.

Such rude materials made up into a creature of such magnificence. Abigail is the Minotaur, the Medusa, the Diana who turned Actaeon into a stag. She’s perfect. His investment is well worth it.

Hannibal considers for the faintest moment snuffing out the light shining bright before him, and decides against it.

Some master works live on, always more stunning and delightful and terrifying than the artist himself.

*

i’ve never seen anything quite like you, evanstan rpf

He texts his brother. do guys go on dates with guys

Scott texts back: you are the dumbest shit alive

*

but she’s looking at you, ghostbusters 

“There is Nothing Okay about it. It’s the opposite of okay. It happened. It felt real. I thought it was you the whole time, I believed it, I believed you’d—I thought— and now I just.” She stops for a moment before it comes out. “Erin, I can remember exactly the way you taste.”

*

let’s go back to the start, mcu

“This sort of thing,” Bucky says, “It comes with the job.” 

It’s an interruption, but not unwelcome. Peter’s been sitting alone on the tarmac for a while now. And it’s not as if they talk on the regular. Peter’s got a bottomless well of respect for the man but the new Captain America is taciturn at best.

“Steve believed in me when no one else did.” Bucky’s so quiet it’s hard to hear him. “Against all odds. And I fell in love with him for it.”

Peter knew, but this was the first admission, so he keeps a dead silence. 

Bucky continues: “I don’t fault you for believing in him.” Each word seems to be carefully selected. “Steve would have done the same.”

“Captain Rogers was a– He was a good man.”

There’s a shadow of a smile on Bucky’s lips. “We can’t all be good men.” And he hesitates before: “No matter how hard we try.”

*

something yet unpublished; star wars sequel trilogy 

It’s a dream, a terrible one; she’s got her hands around Kylo’s neck, her thumbs pushing against the soft flesh of his throat. He’s beneath her, writhing against her ministrations but unable to escape. She holds him there, holds him tight and leans in close. “I killed you like this before, Ben,” she says. Her fingers will leave bruises. “I watched you die under me, my hands like this,” and she squeezes tighter. “I could do it again, love. So easily.”

He spits out: “She’ll kill you.”

“Mmm,” she says. “Will you, Rey?” she says. And suddenly, Rey is the voyeur, not the woman who has clambered on top of Kylo Ren, put her hands around his neck, and choked him to a point that his face is pale.

The woman is leather clad, three buns in her hair, and her smile is cruel.

Rey summons her lightsaber, bares it bravely over the woman’s head. An honest threat.

“He doesn’t deserve your fealty, Rey,” the woman says. “I do.”

[kairoth]

All the Greek myth asks?

GODS: Life

Zeus: What’s your name or nickname?🌟 name is kaeden, and nickname… kae, eden, my mum calls me kitten

Hera: Where are you from?🌟 fllloorriiiiddaa

Athena: How old are you?🌟 15! turning 16 in august :>

Hephaestus: When is your birthday?🌟 august 17!

Aphrodite: What’s your relationship status?🌟 depressingly single lmao

Poseidon: What are your pronouns?🌟 he/him, but i also like xe/xem…

Dionysus: Are you and extrovert or an introvert?🌟 introvert!

Demeter: Do you have any pets?🌟 yes so many

Apollo: What kind of music are you into?🌟 mostly alternative rock

Artemis: What do you first notice about new people?🌟 their appearance and voice ig?

Hades: What’s a big fear of yours?🌟 being alone ugh

Ares: What’s a big pet peeve of yours?🌟 uhhhh just ppl bein jerks in general

Hestia: Where do you consider home?🌟 home is where the heart is lmao and for me that’s my loved ones. tho things feel different without harley

CREATURES: Lasts

Pegasus: Last movie you watched?🌟 i watched coco with @amporass yesterday!! it was amazing i cried

Mermaid: Last tv show you finished?🌟 parks n rec for like the 50th time

Centaur: Last book you read?🌟 hhh not counting fanfiction,, i re-read runt by marion dane bauer

Siren: Last song you listened to?🌟 wake up by EDEN

Gorgon: Last thing you ate?🌟 uuhhhhhhhh chicken from ale house

Cyclops: Last time you cried?🌟 yesterday watching coco lmao

Minotaur: Last time you were truly happy?🌟 welp idk. with harley prob

Sphynx: Last text you sent?🌟 u h h “asfggh”

Chimera: Last call you made?🌟 to my mum yesterday

Griffin: Last thing you did before going to sleep last night?🌟 uhm. pet my cat

Nymph: Last dream you remember?🌟 i had a weird dream last night where my mum moved my fish and i was mad abt it??

Satyr: Last time you couldn’t stop laughing?🌟 UH. i don’t remember??

HEROES: Experiences

Heracles: Have you ever had a dream come true?🌟 i’m getting an aussie puppy soon :D

Theseus: What is your worst regret?🌟 i’d rather not say

Perseus: Have you ever been arrested?🌟 nop!

Cadmus: Have you ever had your heart broken?🌟 yea

Achilles: Have you ever had to be hospitalized?🌟 uhh yea

Actaeon: Tell about a memory you wish to forget.🌟 oof no.

Bellerophon: Have you ever passed out?🌟 nahh

Agamemnon: What is an achievement you’re proud of?🌟 uhhh finishing my classes ig

Oedipus: Have you ever been in love?🌟 i think so :0

Jason: Have you ever travelled abroad? Where?🌟 sadly nah

Atlanta: Have you ever stood up for someone else?🌟 yea ! our classmates were jackasses to me and my friends so i tried to stand against them

Hippolytus: Tell an experience you will never forget.🌟 mmm. cuddling with harley

MAGICAL ITEMS: Favorites 

Trident: Who are your favorite people?🌟 oof. my mum, @serendipitysweet, @spicy-spook, @amporass, my pals in the bongwater family gc, aanndd a couple of my cousins/aunts/uncles

Lightning Bolt: What are your top three favorite movies?🌟 AgH this is always hard. uHm ponyo, the eden of the east movies, and uhh the crow

Sun Chariot: What is your favorite mythological creature?🌟 OOOF UHMM i gotta say ampithere they’re coolio. i’d die for most of the draconic ones

Lyre: What are your top three favorite songs?🌟 y u do dis ヽ( `д´*)ノ uhm jupiter by EDEN, drowning. by EDEN, and fumes by EDEN. just. EDEN

Caduceus: What is your favorite color?🌟 black and periwinkle

Aegis: What is your favorite book or series?🌟 ffffff book is we were liars by e. lockhart and series is the tigers curse series by colleen houck

Scythe: What is your favorite tv show?🌟 psych

Bident: What is your favorite way to spend free time?🌟 uhh reading, listening to music, and cuddling one of  bbys. simultaneously.

Harpe: What are your top 3 favorite places?🌟 maryland, my house, and my aunt angie’s house.

Cornucopia: What is your favorite place to eat?🌟 mmm either harry’s or yamato’s

Winged Sandals: What is your favorite thing to do when you hangout with your friends?🌟 play games !

Golden Fleece: What is your favorite animal?🌟 The Dreaded Question

PLACES: Goals and Wishes

Olympus: Describe your dream job.🌟 i own an animal shelter/wildlife sanctuary. it’s fairly successful. maybe i could be a photographer or a youtuber or smthn too

Tartarus: What’s a short term goal you hope to achieve?🌟 finish my classes and get my puppy

Underworld: Describe your dream vacation.🌟 idk! idc honestly long as i’m having fun and with someone i like

Styx: How would you like your life to look like in 10 years?🌟 idk i might be dead by then

Athuna: If you could live anywhere in the world for the rest of your life, where would it be?🌟 i’d like to live in a giant compound with all my family and friends. preferably on a private island

Sparta: Do you have a bucket list? If so, what’s on it?🌟 see a tiger. pet tiger. die happily by tiger. idk

Elysium: If you could have a superpower, what would it be?🌟 i’d wanna have a druid’s abilities. like shapeshifting and talking to animals and whatnot

Ogygia: Describe your dream husband/wife/life partner?🌟 y u do dis??? (ノ°益°)ノ idk just. someone who will love me despite all my quirks and flaws and who will protect me ig lmao.

Troja: What is the craziest thing you wanna do before you die?🌟 i’d really like to pet all the big cats

The Labyrinth: Have you ever died and came back to life as a vampire?🌟 n,, no?????? not as a vamp

Delphi: Are you currently doing anything to pursue your dreams?🌟 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

lame answers today i’m. sorrythanks for asking 💜💙💜💙💜💙💜

[darth-vading]

Pls do all the greek asks !💕

Zeus: name or nicknameMy name’s Greg but ppl call me toby and togy and groby

Hera: where am I fromPennsylvania

Athena: my age17

Hephaestus: birthdayFebruary 2nd 2001

Aphrodite: my relationship statusSingle until I fix myself

Poseidon: pronounsHe/him

Dionysis: extrovert or introvertBoth

Demeter: pets8 cats, a gecko, 4 fish

Artemis: what do u notice abt new pplTheir hair and height

Hades: fearsOpen water, boats, being alone

Ares: pet peevesNot using the right pronouns for people, racists, people who make fun of others for their interests ( unless of course their interests are harming others)

Hestia: where do u consider homeIdk yet

Pegasus: last movie u watchedI don’t remember

Mermaid: last TV show u finishedIn the flesh. I’m currently in the process of finishing Hannibal

Centaur: last book u readFeed ( I forgot who it was by)

Siren: last song I listened toTalk is cheap by Chet faker

Gorgon: last thing u ate general tsos chicken

Cyclops: last time I criedLike legit an hour ago bc I’m a dramatic bitch

Minotaur: last time I was happyToday

Sphynx: last text I sent❤️

Chimera: last call I madeTo Little Caesars for pizza

Griffin: what I did before sleep last nightI watched porn for a full hour

Nymph: last dream I rememberLast night I had a dream abt demons and me falling in love with one but he got killed bc he wasn’t allowed to love a human pfft

Satyr: last time I couldn’t stop laughingLast Thursday

Heracles: ever had a dream come trueYeah. The fact that I’m getting on testosterone this summer is pretty surreal

Theseus: worst regretIdk tbh. A lot of things

Perseus: have u ever been arrestedI’ve been put in the back of a cop car but not arrested

Cadmus: had ur heart brokenHaven’t we all???

Achilles: ever been hospitalizedYeah

Actaeon: a memory I wish I could forgetAll my memories up until like two months ago tbh lmao

Bellerophon: ever passed outYeah I was punched by a friend as a joke and I got knocked out 😂

Agamemnon: an achievement I’m proud ofNone

Oedipus: ever been in loveProlly

Jason: ever travelled abroad?Nah

Atlanta: ever stood up for someone elseYeah my friend jayci was getting bullied and I broke this assholes nose and he cried and called me a bitch

Hippolytus: an experience I won’t forgetIdk

Trident: favorite peopleHmmmmmmm idk I low-key got trust issues so it’s hard to like label anyone as a favorite right now. Plus like a lot of people leave and I don’t wanna get my hopes up so oof

Lightning bolt: top 3 favorite moviesWhere the wild things are, uptown girls, big hero

Sun chariot: fav mythological creatureOooo sirens

Lyre: top 3 favorite songsAcetone by vundabar, if you really love me by Jamaican queens and menswear by the 1975

Caduceus: fav colorYellow or orange or gold

Aegis: fav bookGhost boy by Iain Lawrence

Scythe: fav TV showHannibal or in the flesh

Bident: fav way to spend free timePlaying Kings raid

Harpe: top 3 favorite placesCooks forest, West Virginia, Pittsburgh

Cornucopia: fav place to eatAny Chinese place

Winged sandals: fav thing to do with friendsGive em tarot readings

Golden fleece: fav animal

Cats, deer, crow

Olympus: dream jobBotanist

Tartarus: short term goalsGet on t, change my name legally

Underworld: dream vacationHome

Styx: how I want life to look like in ten yearsTestosterone, name changed, top surgery or at least plans to get it, maybe in a long term healthy relationship

Athuna: where would u live foreverCanada

Sparta: bucket listGo to a beach after getting top surgery and not having to wear a shirt, stuff like that

Elysium: superpowers?Shapeshifting

Ogygia: dream husbandMasculine, kinda taller than me a bit, doesn’t judge me for my learning disabilities, doesn’t call me stupid, doesn’t cheat on me, understands my bpd and other mental illnesses

Troja: crazy thing to do before deathNothing I’m a scared hoe

Tysm dork !

[devoureroftomes]

Trailer Park Fae (Gallow and Ragged #1) by Lilith Saintcrow

I don't know where to start with this book.

It feels like it starts in the middle and then goes all over the place. I remember being well past 50% and only having an inkling of what's going on by scraping on this and that like a rule 63 Sherlock. And apart from that, honestly, not caring at all.

To be fair, with a title like this I expected something like The Southern Vampire Mysteries but with more Fae instead of vampires.

What I got was a mix between The King of Elfland's Daughter,  an attempt at being Shakesperean, and a wannabe Frank Castle protagonist.*

From the description above, you can get an inkling of the way this book is written. It’s prose so purple Anish Kapooor isn’t allowed to read it.

Examples:

Summer, soft green hills and shaded dells, lay breathless under a pall of smoky apple-blossom dusk. The other Summer, her white hands rising from indigo velvet to gleam in the gloaming, waved the rest of her handmaidens away. They fled, giggling in bell-clear voices and trailing their sigh-draperies, a slim golden-haired mortal boy among them fleet as a deer—Actaeon among the leaping hounds, perhaps.

A chill breeze resonated through superstructure, iron girders harpstrings plucked by invisible fingers. He was wet with sweat, exhaust-laden breeze mouthing his ruthlessly cropped black hair. Poison in the air just like poison in the singing rods and rivets, but neither troubled a Half. He had nothing to fear from cold iron.

Anish Kapoor restricted prose.

It felt like eating cotton candy, seriously

As for the protagonists, we have two of them.

Jeremiah Gallow and Robin Ragged [if you’re feeling formal (sic)]. 

Jeremiah is half-fae former Knight(?) of queen Summer but he has left that life behind and works construction. He’s shown to be a complete wreck after his wife’s death but then Robin appears and she happens to look like a dead ringer of the aforementioned wife. And then Jeremiahsomehow starts to forget about his wife even though he and Robin have absolutely ZERO chemistry.

And Robin? Apart from her name being an Unfortunate, capital U, choice, considering there’s an actual Goodfellow in the book (which made things really confusing), I can’t say she was interesting at all. The only bit I enjoyed was when she gives a magic thing to a child so her daddy will stop drinking. But in retrospect even that was Bad because who ever heard of fae (even half ones) giving anything away out of the goodness of their hearts?

I don’t know, so far I have yet to find a Faerie book I have actually enjoyed, and I freaking love the Fae. I thought it might be that I am also writing a book with Fae in it so I have a very specific view on how they should be but I honestly liked how Saintcrow kept mostly loyal to the actual myths. 

I shall continued on my quest to find a good urban fantasy Fae book. This was not it. 

PS- I don’t count Artemis Fowl (which was excellent) as a UF fae book, as I tend to think of that more as a cyberpunk series than UF

PS2- The thing I enjoyed the most was Dan Dos Santos’s cover. His artwork is always top notch 👌

3/10

[lovethyfanperson]

All the Greek god asks?

Uhh, Okay!Zeus: What’s your name or nickname?Reese! It's not my birth name, but it's the name I go by on TumblrHera: Where are you from?America!Athena: How old are you?I am 16 going on 17Hephaestus: When is your birthday?November 6thAphrodite: What’s your relationship status?I am taken, and have been for a year and three monthsPoseidon: What are your pronouns?I use all pronouns except for the term "it", I find it degradingzDionysus: Are you and extrovert or an introvert?IntrovertDemeter: Do you have any pets?I wishApollo: What kind of music are you into?I don't really have a music type... i like songs from all genres and artists. Artemis: What do you first notice about new people?Eyes and hairHades: What’s a big fear of yours? Being left alone and forgottenAres: What’s a big pet peeve of yours?People throwing an arm around my shoulder. There are few people who are the exception.Hestia: Where do you consider home? The TheatrePegasus: Last movie you watched?Kingsman: The Golden Circle Mermaid: Last tv show you finished?Finished? Uh... Teen WolfCentaur: Last book you read?Read or finished? Read, it's "The Fever Code". Finished, it's "The Yellow Brick War"Siren: Last song you listened to?Don't Go Away (Remastered) by OasisGorgon: Last thing you ate?A watermelon Blow PopCyclops: Last time you cried?Uh, yesterdayMinotaur: Last time you were truly happy?Monday when I saw a movie alone with my bfSphynx: Last text you sent?An "ok" to my dadChimera: Last call you made?To my mom yesterday to tell her rehearsal was overGriffin: Last thing you did before going to sleep last night?Texted my boyfriend goodnight because I do that every night.Nymph: Last dream you remember?I was at this really demented version of Disney land. I'll tell y'all the dream later if you'd like, it would make for one hell of a story!Satyr: Last time you couldn’t stop laughing?I was laying with my boyfriend cuddling and I just started laughing and couldn't stop. He's used to this by now.Heracles: Have you ever had a dream come true?Well I used to dream about my crush kissing me and that happened so yeahTheseus: What is your worst regret?Not joining Theatre Freshmen yearPerseus: Have you ever been arrested? NopeCadmus: Have you ever had your heart broken?Yes. I don't really like to talk about it, but I'll just say I had a crush on a good friend who found out.Achilles: Have you ever had to be hospitalized?Yeah, two summers ago I had a bad UTIActaeon: Tell about a memory you wish to forget.My boyfriend having to kiss another girl for the school playBellerophon: Have you ever passed out?Yeah. Right in front of my fsmily. We have a hallway that connects to the kitchen, and one of the walls is this giant closet with sliding doors (and the doors are mirrors). I was walking down the hall to get to the table for dinner (we have dinner together every night) and I passed out in the middle pf the hall and hit my head on the mirror. My dad yelled "WHAT THE FUCK"Agamemnon: What is an achievement you’re proud of?Being in almost all the productions I have auditioned for (with the exception of the first one I ever tried out for)Oedipus: Have you ever been in love?YesJason: Have you ever travelled abroad? Where?Nope. I wishAtlanta: Have you ever stood up for someone else?Every day sweetheartHippolytus: Tell an experience you will never forget.I got to help create an original play with the help of other theatre students my age, act in it, and perform it for not only my family, but my boyfriend's family, and my theatre teacher. And a whole bunch of other people.Trident: Who are your favorite people?My boyfriend Laurens, my parents, and my best friend.Lightning Bolt: What are your top three favorite movies?Grosse Point Blanke, Ant-Man, KingsmanSun Chariot: What is your favorite mythological creature?OOOOOO, I really like Cerberus, Valkyrie, Sirens, and my social life.Lyre: What are your top three favorite songs?Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls, Brighter by Patent Pending, Breaking the Habbit by Linkin ParkCaduceus: What is your favorite color?Maroon at the momentAegis: What is your favorite book or series?Either Percy Jackson and the Olympians or Dorothy Must DieScythe: What is your favorite tv show?Teen WolfBident: What is your favorite way to spend free time?Writing, or snuggling my boyfriendHarpe: What are your top 3 favorite places?Home, the Theater, anywhere w/ my boyfriendCornucopia: What is your favorite place to eat?A place called Britos they have some HELLA good friesWinged Sandals: What is your favorite thing to do when you hangout with your friends?Play games, watch videos, or see plays/musicalsGolden Fleece: What is your favorite animal?PenguinOlympus: Describe your dream job.Simple - novelist. Or a baker.Tartarus: What’s a short term goal you hope to achieve?Uh... Finish five chapters for my book before the end of the semester.Underworld: Describe your dream vacation.Disney World with enough money to get a few things for myself and my friends, and where my best friend or my boyfriend (or both!) are with me to enjoy the experience.Styx: How would you like your life to look like in 10 years?Finished my first book, in a healthy relationship, financially stable (one can dream)Athuna: If you could live anywhere in the world for the rest of your life, where would it be?I would live in/close to New York so I can see shows on BroadwaySparta: Do you have a bucket list? If so, what’s on it?Act in a professional musical/play, write a book or two, meet Matt Smith, meet all three broadway Ben's, meet Jeremy Jordan.Elysium: If you could have a superpower, what would it be?ConfidenceOgygia: Describe your dream husband/wife/life partner?Troja: What is the craziest thing you wanna do before you die?Eat a cookie, and then... eat another cookieThe Labyrinth: Have you ever died and came back to life as a vampire? Shit, how'd u know?Delphi: Are you currently doing anything to pursue your dreams?Writing an original story that is not yet titled, but is saved in my google docs as "My parents are Dead", in which I use musical character names as place fillers for my characters so I can name them later.

[xxsovereignsarayaxx]

Supernatural - Road to Revenge Chapter 4

Authors Note: Here is chapter 4! Hope everyone is well. Thank you to all for the likes and re-blogs. If anyone wants to be tagged in the upcoming chapters please send me an ask. Bit more drama to be added to the plot. Word Count: 2934 Warnings: There is some angst in this one. Character death.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

My heart had just shattered into pieces.

Nia was dead…

I had seen plenty of bodies in my lifetime but with this being Nia’s body and not just some stranger. It was different. It was a member of my family so now it was personal. 

Her body was tied to a chair, the rope that once bound her was drenched with her blood. Whatever blood was still in her body still slowly dripped onto the floor. Her head tilted backwards - lifeless. Her eyes had rolled and dry tears and what makeup was left stained her once perfect features. Nia’s long black hair was matted and messy. I noticed her top had been cut, pulling the knife I had in my boot. I used it to carefully peel the blood soaked garment away for a closer inspection, the new anti-possession tattoo she had gotten a mere few hours before, the tattoo that was meant to keep her safe had a large gash breaking it. And just like a devil's trap or salt circle once it was broken you were no longer protected. 

I felt something wet on my face. I was crying. I didn’t cry. I was never allowed to. But suddenly I just collapsed to the ground, the knife that was once in my hand clattered to the floor. The last and only normal part of my life had been taken away from me. I curled up into a ball on the floor. I felt weak, powerless and vulnerable. 

Was she in Heaven? Was she in Hell? 

As I laid there on the floor. I remembered...

Weaknesses are not tolerated. Failure is not an option.

My training started when I was five years old, I was taught how to dismantle and reassemble a handgun, then shoot it with precision by seven my marksmanship was the top of its game. I even rivalled some of the adults. At eight I had to prove that I was the top of my class, my opponent  and other classmates finally understood why you never brought a knife to a gunfight. I was being trained into the perfect killing machine, they were lucky I was a blank slate when I arrived. When my fourteenth birthday came I was sent out in the field, it was also the day I escaped from the clutches of my handler.

“Nicole, step forward.”  

I did as I was asked and stepped forward, there was a line of us eight of us to be exact both male and female. All dressed in black, our hair was neat and tidy and the same solemn expression littered each individual face except for one.

“Maxwell, step forward.”

The boy froze in his place. 

“Maxwell, step forward. You know the rules if your name is called out you step forward.” The voice said again this time firmer with more authority.

The boy finally stepped forward and the rest of the line was dismissed, they dispersed quickly and quietly hardly making a sound.

“One of you is ready to graduate. But you must prove your worth. You must prove to ‘The Men of Letters’ that you are ready.” 

With that we were left on our own. We knew that only one would leave the room - That person would be me.

“Nicole… We don’t have to do this.” Maxwell whimpered, his eyes searching for a shred of hope.

“This is what they have trained us for.” I said bluntly looking at the few weapons that were left on a nearby table.

“But…”

“Maxwell you are weak. And weaknesses will not be tolerated!” I shouted as I picked up a throwing knife and launched it at him. I missed by an inch.

“You were chosen because you needed to be dealt with. Failure is not an option, you have failed the Men of Letters because you are weak.” I stated as I cornered him.

And right before I had him pinned up against a wall…

I shot back up but this time I wasn’t alone Dean had me cradled in his arms. I then broke down, tears streamed down my face once more, I buried myself in his jacket. From that moment the remnants of the person I used to be, came flooding back. I will hunt down this demon and nobody is going to stop me.

 “Nikki I’m so sorry.” Dean said, trying to shush me to try and calm me down.

“I need...I need to put her to rest.” I muttered trying to get out of Dean’s embrace. He wouldn't let me go at first.

Escaping Dean’s iron hold I clambered back up to my feet, bending down to pick up the knife. The silver blade being a welcomed cold feeling on my palms as I tightened my grip. Carefully making my way to Nia’s body I sliced through the blood soaked ropes. 

“I know she wasn’t a hunter but I think a hunter's funeral would be best.” Dean said softly. 

I nodded, finally through all of the ropes that held Nia. I closed her eyes and Dean walked over and carefully picked her up.  

“Please be careful with her.” I whispered. 

Dean never uttered a word but simply nodded. As he held Nia close to his chest, not caring that her blood stained his clothes, we made our way through the empty bar and back to the impala, opening the back seat door Dean slid Nia’s body onto the smooth yet worn leather. We drove towards the Las Vegas Ranger District as that was the closest place to give Nia a proper hunters funeral. The drive was silent, nothing but the odd glance at one another. By early morning we arrived, Dean immediately got out of the car and got the axe that lived in the trunk. I still sat in the car keeping Nia company, I turned to look at her.

“Ni, I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you. I’m sorry that I haven’t been there for you when you needed me, I’m sorry I have been a crappy sister. But I promise you that I will find the bastard that did this to you and I will make them pay. I hope wherever you are, you’re happy and at peace.” I whispered to her, reaching out to hold her cold and lifeless hand one last time. 

Once Dean had cut down enough trees to make a base, he offered to get Nia out of the car but I declined, I had to be the one to do this. I opened that car door and picked up my sister. Even though she was slightly taller than me I was still able to lift her. I put her on a white sheet that Dean got out of the trunk and placed on the floor. Smoothing out her hair, I kissed my fore and middle fingers and planted them on her forehead.

“Sweet dreams sis.” I said softly and wrapped her up tying the sheet where necessary. 

I carried Nia to the base, I struggled to place her down and Dean with an act of kindness aided me, he didn’t take over he just helped and I was thankful for it. He then took a step back as I doused Nia’s body with salt and the gasoline. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a silver zippo style lighter - it was Nia’s lighter, the one I had bought for her on her birthday when she turned 21. I had it engraved with the words. ‘Smoking is bad for you. You're a pain in the ass. Try not to lick anymore window glass.’ I took the lighter. It seemed fitting to do it with this. As I flicked the lighter a flame appeared. I watched the mix of blue and amber dance together. 

“I promise I will avenge you Ni…” And with that I threw the lighter onto the wood and flames roared to life as they ate up her body. 

Dean pulled me close, both of our eyes were red…

“Has your past got something to do with Nia’s death?” Dean asked me to break the silence.

“Yes…”

We stayed with Nia for a good twenty minutes and then headed back to the car. My walking pace was faster than Deans.

“Actaeon as in the wind, we need to rethink how we are going to do this.” Dean suggested softly. 

“How I’m going to rethink this.” I said stopping and turning to face him.  

“Nik, you can’t do this one alone.” Dean replied, coming to a halt.

I shrugged my shoulders. “I can’t do this alone? You should know me better than anyone Dean, that if I’m told I can’t do something I will do the opposite.” I argued raising my voice.

“You’ll get yourself killed!” Dean snapped.

“Then so be it! I just had the last shred of normality ripped away from me.” I shouted back.

“You want to end up like Nia? You want it to be where it’s me and Sam burning your body? Is this what you're aiming for? You are the best thing that happened to me Nikki and I’m going to bloody make sure you're still around. If Nia’s death is connected to your past then you need to fill me in. Even if it's just the basics.” 

“You know the basics Dean. I was in a foster home when I was fourteen, I met you and Sam a couple years later.” I replied bringing my tone of voice back to its softer tone of voice.

“Why were you in that foster home though?” 

“Because I ran away from what I thought was my home. Because I wanted no connection with my past and coming to America was the best way to do that. Because I wanted to forget what I was being turned into, but when it’s drilled into you 24/7 for almost a decade you don’t know any different!” I ranted.

Every time I spoke Dean inched closer to me and by the time I had finished speaking we were face to face, I had told him too much. I let my emotions get the better of me. He pulled me closer and kissed me hard but full of love and passion, he held my face in his hands. But while he was doing that I had another idea in mind, I reached into my jacket pocket and held onto a set of handcuffs that I shoved in there earlier, and with a grip on the metal restraint I slowly pulled them out quietly so I wouldn’t be caught.  

“I am so sorry.” I whispered as I pulled away from Dean. 

I quickly attached one cuff to his wrist, maneuvering around so I stood behind him. I grabbed his other hand and cuffed that one as well. A look of disbelief was plastered over Dean's face. 

“Nik? What are you doing?” He asked cautiously, spinning back around to face me.

“I have to find him D…I have to send that son of a bitch to rot back in hell. He killed my sister…” I replied with tears falling down my features once more. I cried more times today then I had ever done in the past. 

“Revenge is a dangerous road to go down. You told me that.” Dean pleaded. 

“I don’t want you to see the things I’m going to do.” I said plainly. 

“Please when this is over I hope you forgive me.” I added and punched him in the face with such force I knocked him clean out. 

As Dean fell backwards I fished my phone from my pocket. Dialling Crowley’s number he picked immediately.

“Fawn pleasant surprise.”

“Where can I find him?” I asked, looking back over my shoulder still seeing Dean passed out. 

“Like I said you don’t find Actaeon.”

“Then point me in the right direction Crowley…” I snapped.

“Fine, fine.” 

The phone line went dead but however he appeared at my side. Peering over my shoulder he saw Dean still unconscious; he pulled a sarcastic face. 

“Dean will wake up with a headache and nothing more.” I told him.

“If you say so.” 

“Anyway, so like I have mentioned time and time again, you don’t find Actaeon. But I can point you in the right direction. Head over to this address. You're looking for a sweet thing called Kandy. And by sweet I mean fickle and conniving."

“So just normal demon behaviour? So this Kandy she works for Actaeon?” I replied sarcastically raising an eyebrow.

“Your reputation precedes you Miss Callahan…”

“Nobody calls me that now…”

“You really think a change in last name and moving to another country would keep you safe?” Crowley asked.

“It worked well so far…”

“Do Moose and Squirrel know of your past?” 

“No and it stays that way. Do you hear me?” I almost shouted back.

Crowley put both of his hands up in surrender. “Alright Fawn I won’t say a word.”  

Still holding my phone I threw it on the ground making sure it smashed in the process, I couldn't have Sam nor Dean track me. This would be my fight. Satisfied that my phone no longer worked I walked over to Baby knowing that putting a knife in her tires would definitely end my relationship with the unconscious hunter so instead I took the dust caps off letting the air out. I needed that small head start before Dean came around. I took off the two thigh holsters and left one of my weapons on the ground near the impala. I wanted to use it as a sign to Dean that I would come back.

I turned to Crowley. “Let’s go.” Holding one of my guns, sliding out the magazine and checking the chamber, and then tucking it into the waistband of my jeans hiding it with my jacket.

Crowley got me to where I needed to be, Omaha Nebraska to be exact. I was currently looking at this small bar located down this alleyway, standing in a small puddle I turned to look at Crowley. “This is where this Kandy is?” I asked.

“Correct Fawn, this is the end of the line in where I shall be assisting you. Good luck.”

“I know you didn’t have to help me, but thank you.” I replied.

Holding my head high I entered the small bar, this time there were actual people inside which was a good sign, as I approached the counter I took note of the bartender cleaning glasses. She was around 5ft5, bubblegum pink hair with bright blue eyes. Her makeup was full and her false eyelashes were one of the most standout features, she stood out. “Hi Sugar, what can I get you.” She asked in a southern accent.

“Whiskey neat please.”   

The bartender picked up a clean glass and put it on the counter bending down to get a bottle of whiskey and poured a generous helping into the glass. She nudged it forward. Taking the glass I brought it to my lips and took a sip, pausing for a moment appreciating the taste I placed it back onto the counter. 

“What’s a sweet thing like you doing in a place like this?” The bartender asked me in her southern drawl.

“Could ask you the same question?” I countered.

“Well I work here sugar. What's your excuse?” 

I took another sip of my drink enjoying the burn. “I’m looking for someone.”

“I make it my business to know everything and everyone about this city.” 

“Do you know where I can find someone called Kandy?” I asked tracing the rim of the glass with my finger.

“Well you're looking at her. Now are you a friendly hunter or do I need to get my friends over there involved?” She asked pointing to some of the bar patrons as her eyes flickered to black and then back to the radiant blue.

I turned to look over my shoulder seeing the potential demons by the door.

“If you don’t give me a reason to shoot you then I’m a friendly hunter I shall be.” I replied, flashing her a smile. 

“I’m told you work for Actaeon, do you know where I can find him?”

Kandy let out a chuckle and leaned towards me. “I sure do. But why would I go against him? I mean Actaeon keeps me safe from the likes of your kind.”

“You know how I said before that I wouldn’t shoot you, you're now starting to give me a reason to.” I told the pink hair demon giving her a wink. 

I downed the rest of my drink and slammed it on the counter. “Unless you want a bullet in between your eyes. I know, I know it won’t kill you but I’m pretty sure I can get hold of an angel blade that will. Actaeon may have protected you from other hunters but he won’t be able to keep you safe from me…” I added in a sickly sweet voice. 

“And there is the person that I’ve heard so much about.” Kandy said with a chuckle.

After that moment a bag covered my head and I was restrained. I struggled in the grip that held onto my tight. Kicking my legs trying in any attempt to break free from my captors. “Let me go!” I attempted in a muffled shout. As I was moved into another part of the bar I was forced into a seated position, I then had my arms tied behind my back to the back of the chair. 

“Well, well, well” Said an unknown male voice.