#do i even have to say it just iykyk
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the vampyre by 18th century author john polidori is a self insert vampiric yuri
ok fucking hear me out on this one.
general thesis: lord byron (you might know him as the guy who wrote don juan), infamous for being a queer little hedonistic slut, pioneered gothic romantic horror by permanently changing the brain chemistry of one mary shelly + john william polidori. part one of two.
so the story starts off when byron and his doctor (polidori) fucked off to some mansion for the summer. shelly (~19 at the time)? + her husband (percy shelly, also rlly prolific poet) was convinced by one of byron's fangirls to chase him there, and somehow ended up living at the mansion. they did cocaine and drank and probably fucked in that lovely summer house, but MOST IMPORTANTLY they wrote. a lot. they were all authors/poets to some extent, they ended up swapping ideas and bouncing criticism and basically doing the 1800s equivalent of livejamming on discord. this went on for a few weeks or so.
one fateful night, all these fuckers got locked into the mansion because of a huuuuuuuge storm that took place, and naturally byron started telling them horror stories (The Burial: A Fragment, probably) that he made up on the spot. this scared the living shit out of his audience, and byron gleefully challenged them to come up with a story just as good. polidori attempted, proceeded to get humiliated live in front of the other authors by byron, and years later, out of spite, wrote:
THE VAMPYRE, one of the very first written vampire novels.
byron's influence in this novel cannot be understated. as aforementioned, byron thought polidori couldnt write to save his life, and polidori therefore had this weird idolizing love/hate relationship with him. the vampyre was, in essence, a giant "fuck you" to his old employer that he too could write a good book—even if, at the same time, he took parts of the burial from earlier to write it. in fact, the villain of vampyre is simultaneously 1) modeled after byron 2) a ruthless heartless sadistic vampire who ends up killing several perfect young girls and eventually the main protagonist 3) the world's first vampiric sexyman.
that's right. polidor's lord ruthven (who is, again, a lord byron insert) is the quintessential the reason why we perceive vampires today as suave queer homoerotic womanizing charismatic GAYS. this gets even funnier when you realize that in vampire, the protagonist (this young rich adventerous "i want to travel the world!" twink named aubrey) & ruthven have this yuri-esque homoerotic relationship involving death and murder and betrayal. see:
aubrey is enchanted by ruthven at first sight and capriciously requests to join his travels (to which ruthven AGREES);
aubrey notes over and over how horrible of a person ruthven is but only leaves once he realizes he's a vampire;
aubrey runs from ruthven across countries and cities only to have ruthven magically show up + kill off one of aubrey's love interests;
ruthven dramatically dies in his arms at one point and makes aubrey promise he'll follow these super specific instructions post-death, to which AUBREY agrees (swears an oath);
later ruthven comes back (duh) and tries to marry aubrey's sister—aubrey attempts to tell everyone but ruthven reminds him of the oath;
aubrey has a nervous breakdown and ends up dying while ruthven marries his sister, sucks her blood, and flees to the night.
gay. gay gay homoerotic gay you CANNOT tell me the vampyre was anything but a queer real person self-insert fiction about him and lord byron. polidori wrote the world's first self-insert about him and the man he was a DOCTOR to and performed PHYSICAL CHECKUPS ON.... C'MON GUYS YOU SEE WHAT I'M SEEING RIGHT. I'M NOT GOING INSANE RIGHT. FUCK
#lord byron#john polidori#the vampyre#gothic romanticism#gothic horror#vampire#english literature#yuri#dirkjake#do i even have to say it just iykyk#more brograndpa maybe but i digress theyre yuri coded#ok next up frankenstein and the influence of motherhood#listen i have takes and i must scream
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super disorganized sketch page because i do what i want
#my art#not sure if i wanna tag these... hrm#i wonder if alt text shows up in search results.... shudders#well anyway. i wanna ramble about these!!#for willy mafton: i've been working on designing more of the human cast. mainly all the big name important ones#it's been a slow process + a little challenging but i like getting the chance to practice drawing faces! :]#in regards to His design specifically.. it's very much based off of his movie apperance#but with a reference to that Classic sprite thrown in#bc i thought making him a little cartoony and inhuman would fit him :] but idk im not an expert on his character or anything#about the rabbit lady: i forgot how i had that idea initially but it ended up looking so fucking cool tbh#im always a fan of making her design less of a feminine eye candy type of design and more of a Spooky Murderer type >:3c#it also gave me the idea to try making some similar designs for the glams...#but if i do that im not gonna be giving them that vintage rubber mask look... since they're meant to be super flashy and high tech looking#so i was thinking they could have faces with more of a silicone texture.. and that have a style based more off of their in game art work :]#so they'd be like giant dolls with weird moving faces rather than having a vintage animatronic look#also that van in the bottom middle is 100% a homage to a specific user i wont be mentioning but iykyk HFJZJFJF#ANYWAY the 🌞🌜 stuff: dont be weird about it please HFJZJG#im aware that these tags are very easy to ignore but like. genuinely pls dont be weird about them#dont romanticize it. its not meant to be ''y/ndere'' or anything like that#its actually a bit personal to me so like... interpret it as you like but be aware its not meant to be a happy or positive thing#anyway i think thats all i have to say... i've been trying to branch out a tiny bit regarding the things i draw#it's always nice to challenge yourself even if its tough... especially if its tough!!#i mainly draw just for my own sake but i hope ppl see something they like here#these tags got so fucking long oops... i'll stop now JFKZJFKSJGKSJG
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I don't like the judo flip in moa as much as the next guy but in my eyes it's largely the result of rick not taking female violence half as seriously as male violence (a result of viewing women as weaker and inferior to men such that their acts of violence don't need to be taken as seriously) and not so much anything about annabeth herself. like I do genuinely feel that annabeth is a complex heroine and definitely one of the better ones in the realm of ya action-adventure fiction produced in the past 25 years but she is still a girl being written by a man and all I'm saying is that her writing clearly reflects that sometimes (more in tags)
#case in point: the amazons#hazel: you keep slaves????#kenzie: no. the men just know their place#like...... sure jan. the parody of amazon the company isn't actually using immoral labor the workers just like it that way 🥰#but that line about “knowing their place” would not fly the other way around#because women in power are not taken as seriously as a group of men dominating female workers would be#(we could talk about the futurama amazons too in this context because it's pretty much the same issue of female violence not#being taken seriously and played for laughs instead. iykyk)#do you guys know that trope of girls who are just comically aggressive and mean towards guys who barely reciprocate the energy#(like the majority of the female cast of naruto falls into this trope. again iykyk)#it's like a shallow attempt to write a strong female character by just making her an Angry mean nasty man-hater#or it's just a validation of some nerd's worldview that women are just always so mean towards men who never do anything wrong#and they definitely don't have power over women in society women are just Like that. for some reason#anyways if you couldn't tell by my pfp I'm an annabeth fan so I definitely don't mean this in an anti-annabeth way#just in a Critical of the way rick portrays women way#specifically women that he wants to come off as strong/powerful#and if you are a fellow annabeth stan and feel upset by this all I can say is that it isn't a bad thing to be critical of the way our faves#are written and in fact critical reading is a very important skill to exercise 👍#this is also why I'm annoyed by the “annabeth is abusive” allegations because it's like Ok she's clearly not intended to come off that way#so instead of meaninglessly antagonizing annabeth (who isn't real) or fans who enjoy her/the ship in its entirety#what can we glean about the flaws of the writing. what can we glean about biases of the author who wrote the damn thing#(not saying I even agree with the allegations to begin with because I Don't but yk)#this whole thing stems from social constructs around gender (everything else in the world does) i.e. public reception to female violence#where real world female violence isn't taken seriously so female criminals face less harsh punishments OR the other way around and female#cruelty is received as even more egregious than male cruelty because how dare a woman be anything but kind and nurturing and angelic#btw this is not a safe space to be anti percãbeth/annabeth in my notifs keep that to yourself bud 👍#rr crit#pjo hoo toa#percy jackson
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If I had the ability to led on a grown ass man (without even doing much) for 5 centuries I'd be proud as fuck, lemme tell ya...
Mor probably...
#And I don't even have to do anything!!#Like he's just gonna stay in love with me all this time while I fuck other men (secretly women too... mostly women)#as if I haven't made it FUCKING CLEAR that I don't want a relationship with him...#I lost my virginity to another man to not led him on and make him think we can ever be more than just friends and family#And then I'm literally going through the most traumatic experience of my life and he confesses his great love to me#I'm not in the right place whatsoever and obviously its not a right time he's an idiot and doesn't read the room haha *awkward silence*#AND I just don't say anything and leave (I'm literally at loss for word at this point)#but it doesn't end here... he just doesn't get it!!!#even after that he doesn't try to get close to me and make me comfortable enough to be with him so we can share this strong friendship no..#he stands in the corner of the room look at me weirdly and broods waiting for a mate bond to snap...#I guess *flip hair over shoulder* *teehee* I'm just THAT bitch you know😌💅🏼#part of this man's brain doesn't work istg...#morrigan#the morrigan#pro morrigan#morrigan acotar#I'm sorry for being messy hehe#but I just couldn't resist it#it's both Mor and Azriel week lmao#I had this in my draft for like months!!! and I think now it's a right time to post it lol#this is not exactly an anti post#this mostly toward Azriel stans iykyk
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Y'know I really feel like Harry and Dave's relationship goes highly unexplored which is a shame because there IS quite a bit to explore, ESPECIALLY if you care about shipping. But as the game stands I mean, they must be aware of each other. Harry in fact definitely knows about Dave. I don't think he'd tell the fucking weird rotten bunny his terrible boss brought in IS the number one threat against Freddy's since day 1 but even so. Dave I don't think would see Harry as much more than A Phoney™ though, which is always more of an obstacle and way less of a person. Which is usually opposite of how Jack sees his often sole employee. Like, you get what I mean? It's almost similar to 2 with the main opposing routes being Peter and Dave except the stakes are arguably way lower now.
#luly talks#dsaf#dsaf harry#dsaf dave#harry fitzgerald#dave miller#if you DO care about shipping however the meat to chew on becomes greater#i think dave bond w Phoneys in general goes fairly unexplored which is once again A Shame bc i do like the hypocrisy he holds#in more than one way they mirror each other#now im just getting emotional and derailed now im literally just thinking of steven that's NOT da point now 💥💥💥#point is i do think you'd take this to a weird domesticating route or simply a more. goofy love triangle one#i mean dave does say he'll win Jack back which is peak divorced line#so its like. a tug war. except Harry isn't like peter who was like employee for the love of god i need your help#harry is pretty passive like Sir. This is urgent but it is your choice ☹️#sorry my meds are kicking in what am i even saying anymore?#i feel like that NyQuil post im for sure gonna shit the bed tonight#i digress anyway point being i think you'd go many places with this concept#you'd just have them coexist in a way the game doesn't explore. you'd have it just plaguing Jack's mind.#you'd have a one sided rivalry. you'd have a STRAIGHT UP RIVALRY. you'd have tragedy and agony in planet earth#which i saw be touched up on once by that one artist who draws jack like he never left the 80s mullet and all. muppety too.#iykyk there's like 6 harrysport artists overall you'll figure what i mean#and yeah you'd even have a somewhat functional jack having two hands. which is something taps chest i truly think could happen#i believe un love and peace and chsnge and healing and#and copium first and foremost ☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️#my body feels so heavy its hard to leep my eyes open
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I aced my thesis defence with merits and I WILL TELL EVERYONE ABOUT IT (once i had my little rest) tm
#WHAT I WILL SAY NOW IS#i got max score on every single part#so like#written / project / defence itself#and they also decided they are giving me merits YAY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#THIS IS LIKE#KIND OF SPECIAL#bcs i passed my entry exams with merits also and it came with a fun little ceremony in a fancy lecture hall#so im lowkey hoping ill be invited to a fancy ceremony again to close this stage off <3#im very happy and ngl proud of myself#its a giant bow wrapping up my academic career so far#I WANT MY /I HAVE A PhD/ SHIRT!!!!!!!!!#i was so stressed and it feels so good to have everyone agree that i did REALLY FUCKING GOOD AND DISPEL MY DOUBTS#i was literally told the amount of work i put out is like three thesis' worth and its the best theyve seen in a long while#?????????#fuck my mind demons fr always telling me i dont do enough#that realization only came to me after the fact#also my reviewer absolutely ate my little ass#i dont even think i deserve it LMAO but im glad she liked it and gave me an amazing review!!!!!!#im just!!! SO HAPPY#SORRY IF I COME OFF LIKE IM BRAGGING BUT THIS IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME FR. AND TBH I THINK IF I EVEN HAVE THE REASON TO BRAG IT WOULD BE#ABOUT THIS LIFE EVENT#I want to make a post abt this on my art blog ngl#uni#also gonna tag this as#iykyk#because im petty like that <3#i wonder what people who called me names excelled at recently lol#i wish myself a lot of thriving while they continue wilting
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Personally of the belief that live action fans who go onto animanga posts uninvited like 'I DESPERATELY NEED YOU TO KNOW THAT I THINK THE ART STYLE IS UGLY EVEN THO THIS OPINION IS IRRELEVANT TO THE POST' should be hit with a big rock. We already moved past this ten years ago, get with it or get lost. Swallow the hunger inside of you that demands everything be palatable to you. Maybe you could stand to be a little uncomfortable for a while
#Keep ur trashy comments to yourself#It's not even ugly! It's just not the conventional anime style so you deem it ugly. That's so fucking sad of you#You're the type of person who sees a piece of art and is like OMG WERE THEY ON DRUGS?!?!?!?!?!#Idk I think the art style is very fitting for the gigantic world Oda has built#People are allowed to be ''ugly'' because not all of us were born to be models. Shock and horror I know#(this is NOT aimed at the ppl who critque the way Oda draws women (to a degree...) bc I agree he could've done the same for women as he doe#The men by giving them way more diverse features and body shapes)#No this is aimed at the ppl who think the style as a whole is ugly and demean it bc it doesn't suit their tastes#Meanwhile their taste is the most conventional cookie cutter bland pretty boy/girl bullshit out there#(I say to a degree up there bc I think ppl go way too far with the criticisms like the one person who posted the Charlotte family identical#Sisters and went LOOK HOW SIMILAR THESE WOMEN ARE ODA SUCKS when they were MEANT to look similar)#^ yes that is an actual post I saw in like 2018 or 2019 when WCI was reaching its end in the anime and it made me die laughing#There are dozens of other examples you could've given but no. You intentionally chose the triplets (quintuplets? It's been a hot minute)#Rebecca and Nami and Vivi and Shirahoshi all having the exact same face with different hair? No I will use the identical twins as proof#What a unique way to undermine your own argument bc I was with you up until that#Anyway yeah the more I think abt the more I think the live action sucks actually for getting rid of Sanji's eyebrows bc they'd 'look bad'#Who cares? It's part of his design. You are cutting off parts of his character. Same w/ Usopp's nose.#Who fucking cares if it would have looked 'bad' or 'ugly'? Is that all you guys really care about? Keeping up appearances???#I'm so sick of the shit I like getting 'remade' to appeal to people who will never actually appreciate why stuff looks the way it does#It's so shallow I hate it#<- yes I'm still bitter about what they did to my boy WW in the three guns reboot iykyk#And Livio and Razlo for that matter. What the FUCK was that about#Idk maybe it's cuz it's something I recognized in myself and attempted to squash so it's frustrating seeing other ppl do it#And again obvs Oda isn't perfect w/ this either as he draws evil women as fat old hags and his protags as skinny and beautiful#Or how he thinks not following ur dreams will make u ugly and fat and following ur dreams will make u conventionally attractive#I get it. Storytelling method. But u can do better. Use colorschemes instead of physical attributes or something like Veneer does
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As much as I enjoyed watching Tati Westbrook's videos back in 2018 as 'ASMR' and background noise, not one product she ever recommended/raved about sat well on my skin.
#she also slandered products that worked for me (*cough* bare minerals liquid foundation)#I gave many of her recommendations multiple tries over the years and not once do they hold true to her words#this has completely discredited her as a makeup guru in my eyes & post 2019 (THE drama iykyk) I stopped following her or#any “big” beauty youtuber for that matter. I switched to watching smaller channels with organic “raw” makeup videos that actually zoom in#& now whenever I watch an influencer recommend smth I hate or hate smth I like - I immediately lose trust in anything they have to say-#beauty related. Altho I know there could always b products that work for everyone even if 1 or 2 don't but I just can't care enough to#try products I may not like afterall. Like is it even worth it?#Makeup is a very personal art & this is an obvious example of how there are different audiences for different products &-#why the beauty industry is so saturated with products. You may think “this sucks who buys this” but there's a consumer. There's always a-#consumer that product is a holy grail for.#personal#makeup#tati westbrook#consumerism
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House of leaves really did alter my brain's code. I didn't really believe yall for a while.
#wacky watermelons#apologies for the bluening of house (blue)#feels fitting to do so for a post talking about house (blue) making me feel more eel than previously#genuinely i see footnotes and some part of my brain always goes 'ahh. yes. just like house (blue)' and i have to smack it#it rerouted how my brain processes and appreciates horror#...#this was saved in my drafts and im bringing it back bc i was watching myhouse.wad videos#one of the guys apparently finished house (blue) like a week before he played the map and I must say#thats gotta be a fucked up head space to play that game in.#genuinely no horror yt video has unsettled me as the labyrinth (??) part of the doom house (blue)#similarly allusions so heavy handed they're basically recreations aren't usually ny thing#but esp the doors. it fucking got me. certainly helps that that was easily the most fucked part of the book imo#still. house (blue) is one of those things that I thought was over hyped until I actually experienced it#i might buy my own copy but. ah fuck. jesus christ. dude its 55 god damn dollars on amazon. what the hell#i guess hard cover 400+ big dense pages of print fuckery and colored text but still#anyway. house (blue) will live in my head for a long while. its a good book. even if it swings wildly#from a drug trip to pure horror to confusing to just. a little silly#by the end I think I understood the truant head space just a little. just a little.#plus we can add houses (blue (I think)) to the list of inanimate things that I have weird brain things with. like with eyes. iykyk.
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moving to a major city in youth was really bad for me because i am never going to get over my fear of bugs. or my lack of tolerance for hiking. LMAO. like i enjoy being in botanical gardens and woodsy parks but i am such a wimp about like rough/dense terrain and shit like that i scream at bugs i’m everything people say about city slickers. girl thats me
#i can stand by a river and feed ducks#before we moved there was a park by a river near where i lived where giant rodents lived in the water#and people would go over and just watch them#and feed them sometimes even though we were not supposed to#and going to the Rat River was one of my favorite things#they were nutrias in case anyone is wondering#it is VERY fun to watch a huge wet rat simply sit along a river and maybe even eat a piece of bread#i HAVE carried a dead roach in a sweeping pan to the toilet so that is something#but like i am a yelper and a jumper i am very much afraid of things#love a rat though. we still have huge rats here. iykyk#saw a giant rat at a riverside park near my school CHASE a small dog#that rat had no fear like people were jumping out of the way for IT and it simply carried on#it went where it wanted to go. no weaving around giant feet#anyway like i wont REFUSE to do naturey or physical stuff i’ll always give it a SHOT#and i love a manual task in many cases. but i have a low tolerance for certain things and i know it#what i’m saying is i will do it but i probably won’t last long#another essay in the tags#my need to elaborate is exhausting giod night#me.txt
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how do i contact apple bc actually i am currently going through an internet story but i don't have twitter.
which is to say that 3 weeks ago i was on vacation to the Azores with my family. due to girl pockets (iykyk) my phone fucking jumped into the ocean literally only because i lifted my leg above a 30 degree angle to avoid a wave. the phone was black. the sand was black. it was night. i had waded in about 2 feet deep. i think my guardian angel just closed his eyes.
i immediately reached a state of peace about it. maybe it was a sign from god or the universe. don't we all need to unplug. let's live in the moment or whatever. also, let's give the crabs technology, i just think it would be funny.
i come home. i haven't backed up my phone in a while (lol since 2022) and the shitty replacement i got is literally useless. i lost pictures of newborn babies. i lost contacts. i have to wrangle things together that need 2-factor authentication with a phone that's in the fucking ocean.
and then today i got this notification.
What in the everfuck. are you kidding me. this thing was IN THE OCEAN. like the ACTUAL OCEAN. like originally "find my phone" was reporting it as ABSENT.
and then i get this email:
she found it while she was SNORKLING. at the bottom of the actual ocean. it's been there for 3 weeks.
IT STILL WORKS.
which is to say. like how do i get her anything she wants, forever. i don't have any money but i would buy her a fucking boat of iphones to thank her. how do we get apple to give me a commercial. if nothing else i just want people to know that someone found my phone at the bottom of the ocean because how fucking fake of a story does this even sound.
what's going on. hello????????
#personal#we can take a quick break from anticapitalism to just discuss#the sheer fucking improbability here#remember when i said i have big luck??????????#HELLO???????????????????????????????
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#cryptic ramblings#in the tags#dating app diary#(only tangentially tho)#just thinkin (again) abt how my stupid brain or heart or whichever wont let me enjoy dating apps bc of a) my dumb crush on a celeb and b) th#*the fact that its through an app and w the intention of dating 🥲#the first thing is dumb as is n i dont need to get into tht bc i already have several times (iykyk) but the SECOND.......#its like. i need to meet someone organically n without the context of 'im tryna date u so OF COURSE im gonna act x way to get u interested'#ykwim?? like i needa see them as a Person an Individual before my brain'll let me develop feelings like tht#n SOMETIMES ill meet someone on an app n we'll click but like!!! on a platonic level!! n then its like 'oh. yesh#*'yeah idk abt a romantic relationship here'#n i feel like thats how SO MANY of my romantic endeavors go: i have a crush on someone im friendly w n they only see me as a 'good friend'#or even 'like a sister/sibling' so its like 🧍🏽♀️ aight#anyways ive been off my dating apps for a while n not actively looking for anything (bc my Crush) but im also like. at what point do i try#to move beyond/past that 🧍🏽♀️ when do i say 'aight... thats unlikely... gotta move on...' (bc ik ill move on if/when celebcrush dates#(someone. or at least if he goes public w that info ofc.) but idk im a little weirdo n my heart wont let me let tht go so easy yk?#hence me being off dating apps#(also tht One Encounter had me wanna take a step back anyways. if anyone remembers That.)#idkkkkkkkk
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someone may have to remind me to be careful with straying too far from my dash bc i just read a post that claimed that the fact that there were 3 tv remotes on the coffee table in some promo pics for an upcoming episode meant that a ship was going to become canon and i just. i was just looking for somewhere telling me in which episode a specific thing is discussed i wasn't prepared for that
#it is not in any way more logical with context#i sat there so long just staring at the post trying to make sense of it#just don't understand what series of event leads to that being a . ? apparently obvious line of thinking? i'm not even sure what to say#i still feel like i didn't actually see that but i also thinking i could have made it up so#(i'm not giving more context simply bc i do not want to get involved in any discourse (iykyk) i am simply so baffled i had to say something#my posts
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All Roads Lead To Rome
pedro pascal x younger!reader
summary: your boyfriend swears he isn't annoyed at your little surprise visit on the set of gladiator II; you might have to help him release his anger, one way... or another.
warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap (BARK BARK BARK), smut, p. in v., bit of exhibition kink cause they fuck on his trailer, he swears he's mad but he just wants head, oral (m. receiving), he also uses his armor and skirt while at it bc its hot and not bc i totally want that to happen to me or smth!!!, brat taming, orgasm denial, breeding and daddy kink lowkey, i'm so down bad for him so there's fluff!!! + pedro being whipped cause that's exactly what i want in my men, the cast makes cameos bc i love them!!! use of spanish (i'm latina so don't even try me), pedro wearing a skirt tehee
word count: 3,519 words
side note: i'm about as FERAL and horny as much as one could be!!! damn u pedro, making me walk out in the middle of class and walk on foot to the nearest theather for an early gladiator II screening (bc they're cheaper and i'm a jobless broke student lmao) that mind u it's my first solo trip to the movies but it's okay!!!! nobody interrupt me on my horny dilf hours amirite I TELL U that cinema was almost empty: just me, pedro and hey there's a spot if u wanna join mescal (look at my blog banner IYKYK) so yeah!!!! enjoy this porn lovechild that steemed from it; my pedro renaissance that'd been asleep since tlou dropped AWAKES (u don't get it, i literally watched narcos just for him) i'm so fr i need this man BIBLICALLY!!
"Lemme guess, that's her, right?"
Pedro looks up from his phone, slightly red and embarrassed. He would blame the color on the sun, and as an actor, fake his way out.
"No idea what you're talking about, Paul"
The young man chuckles.
"I mean, every break we get, you take your chair, sit the farthest and pull your phone with the most ridiculous grin I've ever seen. I'm afraid to tell you, friend, you aren't as slick as you think"
He leans back against the chair, covering his face with his large palm.
"At least I tried" he finds no point in lying anymore, "seems like I'm addicted, but if it wasn't for y/n, I wouldn't touch it"
"I'm curious, though" Paul scoots his chair closer, "who texts who? You or her?"
"Me" he answers, but then corrects himself quickly, a bit ashamed of how that makes him sound, "but it's mostly her first".
"Right" he doesn't sound convinced, rather curious and annoyed, something he's too old and tired for, "I don't believe you"
He's about to lock his phone, but the wallpaper (a selfie with you) would probably earn him another mock from Mescal.
"Too bad I don't need you to"
Before he can do so, the irish man yanks his phone away.
"Give it back!" he shouts, earning a few glances from the crew around them, "what are you, ten?"
"No, twenty-eight" they look like kids bickering. "No need to fight me, Mr. Pascal, they haven't taught us the new fighting choreography yet" he mocks, before the phone chimes; they both stop at the sound.
"What does this mean?" Paul asks. "Malta's nice" he reads out loud, "were you talking about possible future vacations? I might have to tag along"
He doesn't follow the man's joke, instead, looking at the message on your chat. Malta's nice, says the little cryptic message, and yes―it is cryptic, because you were just talking about missing each other and some other corny stuff he'd take to his grave. Not vacations, and certainly, not about the european island, which happens to also be the place were he's filming his latest movie.
"No, we weren't" he replies confused, "what do you think it means?"
"Well, obviously, you boys don't know anything" May pops up from behind, laughing.
"Were you eavesdropping?" he asks playfully, albeit, a little offended.
"No, you guys are just too loud" she replies nonchalant. "Besides, you aren't very good at hiding it, either"
"That's what I said!" Paul backs, laughing on his face.
"Stop being misterious and just drop it"
"It means" she pauses―laughing at her own little dramatic effect, "that you're getting a visit soon"
When you met Pedro, you were working in The Last Of Us. Nothing fancy, just part of the technical cast of the show: helping with the filming and stuff.
During those months, it was easy to find yourself falling for the main star (alongside Bella Ramsey), especially when you spent months behind a camera, capturing all of his perfect features; learning them by memory until you could draw them without seeing his face.
Yes, you had fallen for the older man, because it was as natural as breathing; easy as being alive―the fall so gentle and so easy, it was hard to know when the feelings started. You just woke up one day, feeling different.
You liked to act up―always had what you wanted, and times had changed (so it's not like he had to ask first): why not? Which is why during your last day of shooting you took some liquid courage on your veins and went up his way. It was at a little gathering the crew you've grown to call family organized, while wearing your favorite and tightest dress, that you approached him.
It surprised you that he even recognized you, but that's who he was: warm, welcoming and caring.
To augment the surprise, turns out he had eyed you already, but was too shy to do anything. Yes, the worlds most famous Chilean man. It did stroke your ego, and maybe that's why you feel like most of the time, you've got the upper hand on your relationship, despite the years in between.
Still, you feel like the last message you just sent was a bit too blunt. Now you sit at the tiny airport, pondering your next move.
You know your boyfriend isn't exactly the type to scold or get mad―despite his strong figure, but going against the only thing he asked you might test him. Which is why you feel nervous, despite the happiness around you, everyone in the airport looking straight out of a picture perfect summer edition magazine.
And your theory is proven exactly right when you arrive impromptu at the Gladiator II set: making heads turn and guards almost kick you out, thinking you're a fan.
"You don't get it!" you protest, "he's my boyfriend".
"Sure", they laugh on your face. "you're not the first to say that".
"She's not lying" oh, how you love that gravely voice. But not today: not when he sounds like a parent scolding a naive child. Not when his eyes bore into you, slightly irritated.
So now he's dragging you among the set, right to were his trailer is.
"Aren't you going to introduce me?" you ask, puffing your cheeks out in annoyance. He keeps dragging you by the arm, without sparing a glance in your way. Who does he think he is? "I wanted to tell Paul he made me cry―twice. You know I don't play about Normal People and Aftersun"
"But you do seem to play about my orders" he grunts out, opening the door to his trailer. The sunlight reflects against the white, slightly bothering your eyes with its shine, contrary to your boyfriend's gloomy behaviour.
"Are you being serious right now? You're not my dad to scold me. I just wanted to surprise you" you stand still, refusing to get inside. Pedro knows your character tends to be stubborn, and thought he finds it hot to reel you up sometimes, there are other times where he can't just stand that juvenile spirit of rage you tend to have when things don't go the way you want them to. "What's gotten into you?"
"I could ask you the same" he mocks. "Get inside. Now"
"Rude" you scoff, but obey regardless, and he breathes out relieved you didn't do a scene like last time; he still can't show his face on that restaurant to this day.
"I thought you'd be happy to see me" you say a tad bit dissapointed, and Pascal feels the pissed off feelings clouding his brain start to dissipate.
"I do, amor" he sighs, "just hate to see you do things I tell you not to; waltzing in here like you own the place".
You don't see the mistake, though. What's wrong with wanting to do a little surprise? It's not like you were a stalker or something; just a very clingy girlfriend who happens to miss her boyfriend.
"So, you're not mad?" you venture, "tell me you're not embarrassed"
He looks at you, the fondness of his gaze betraying him.
"I'm not the one wearing a skirt while trying to sound intimidating" you joke while caressing the crook of his nose, knowing you always get on his good side. Being mad isn't something that lasts, "if anyone should be embarrassed, that's you"
"Are you saying I shouldn't wear one because I'm a man?" your boyfriend looks offended, "Have you forgotten the movie I'm starring in? People feared the skirt-wearing Roman army"
"Well, I'm not intimidated" you stand defiant, and something dark tints his brown eyes. You can feel the excitement begin pooling in your stomach.
"You're not?" he grips your wrists and yanks you to him, then holds your chin, tilting your head between his calloused fingers. "Well, cariño, you should be"
Your body slams against one of the trailers walls, and you have to suppress a whine.
"You must be punished for what you did today"
You give him a doe-eye look, pretending to be all innocent, as if you weren't enjoying the punishment.
"I don't know what you're talking about. I've been a good girl"
"You know exactly what I'm talking about" he clicks his tongue, "don't play dumb with me"
"I just came to visit you" you murmur, voice husky against his ear. He grunts, and with the proximity, his hard-on rasps against your bare legs, only partly covered by the flowy summer dress you're wearing, "is that so bad?"
"It is. Has sido mala, cariño" his hand travels down under your dress, carresing with his large palm the silhoutte of your ass. The rings on his fingers create a shock, cold metal against your warm sun-bathed skin. "Naughty girl"
"I promise I'll be good, papi" you purr, using that honeyed voice of yours that makes it hard: hard to say no and hard between his pants.
Pedro sits on a small couch he has inside the trailer, guiding you with his hand enveloped around yours, motioning you to follow with a care so soft, you'd doubt he's about to do to you what he is about to do to you. He pulls you across his lap, smiling (God, you love his smile) as your stomach presses against his tights.
"Don't worry" he breathes low, his voice barely above a whisper. "I'll make you a good girl. Tell me, aren't you?"
You swallow, "I am"
He moves the panties easily to the side, rubbing your pussy a little. He then spanks it softly, making you mewl at the sting.
Pedro continues to trace over it, "Are you sure about that?"
"N-no" you shiver in delight, resolve dissolving as quick as it came. "I'm naughty"
"It's good to be aware" he murmurs, "Dilo otra vez"
"I'm a naughty girl"
He lifts your head by your hair. "Tell me what you did"
"Disobeyed your orders, coming to the set" you whisper. He lets go of your hair, his hands traveling down again, slowly teasingly rubbing your pussy while he humms.
"You were a little brat, amor"
You whimpered and mewled in delight. "I was a very naughty brat"
He pushed his fingers inside you, plunging his fingers into your pussy.
"Look at you. You're soaking wet" he pumped his fingers in you, making you moan, "Is that why you came to see me? Couldn't wait any longer for daddy to be inside of you?"
You bucked a little, making him stop. He drags his fingers out, causing you to beg for him to go back.
"Answer my question you greedy thing" He leaned closer to your ear. "Did you need my cock this much?"
You whimper, "I do! Missed you so much"
He pushed his fingers back into you, provoking a moan out of you.
"You're always so needy for me" your core tenses, making you shiver. "How badly do you want me? Tell me"
You whimpered "Badly, papi"
"Say it" his face contorts in satisfaction at your pathethic display; crying little mess, "Who's cock, fingers and mouth make you feel good?"
You can't think at this point, your brain fuzzy and pussy hot, leaking. You kiss his lips, moaning against them, "you!"
"Just me, yes? Nobody else can make you feel this good?"
"No one!"
You involuntarily roll your hips to aid you in pleasure, yet Pedro stops you just before you can reach your orgasm.
"Little brat." he tuts, making you groan. "Did you think I'd let you? You were naughty today, baby"
You huff in annoyance, used to having your way.
"That's your punishment"
"But I'll behave" you mewl against his ear, "I promise"
“Good, because I'm planning on fucking your brains out” his hot breathe whispers in your ear seductively, trying his best not to slur the words at the drunken haze that your arousal provokes in him, "but you have to help me first"
You get on your knees, looking at the garment he's wearing. The skirt and general costume makes this all the more hot, mouth watering at the sight. You raise the skirt, glancing at the briefs; just seeing his dick strained against the fabric makes you wet in anticipation.
He sees the pleasure bore into your orbs, and before you do any dirty idea of yours, he's already warning:
"You have to take this off, what if we-"
"Alright" you cut him off, "but the skirt stays"
"Sigue, pues" he growls, voice low yet demanding, following you in your little game.
As you pull the briefs down, his erection springs out enthusiastically, slapping up against his lower abdomen. You shifted your gaze up to meet his, his eyelids heavy and his proud smirk driving you absolutely wild.
"That's right" he chokes out, "show me how much you missed it"
You give him a proud lick, and Pedro hisses at the moment his preseminal fluid goes in between your hungry lips.
Your tongue darts to the head of his cock, running over it several times before bobbing your head down, taking most of him in your mouth. He keeps praising as you pump the base of his cock with your hand. Your head bobs, yet you peek up to hear Pascal's little sounds and facial expression, a motivation so intimate in the way his brows furrow and eyes roll, mouth agape at your movements while his lip suck on those pretty lips of his. It makes you keep going. With every bob you take as much of him in your mouth as you can, before slowly moving your way back up to the tip, increasing your suction the closer to his head you got. A throaty moan escapes the man above you when you now focus on the final lick, making him closer to coming, all while maintaining eye contact the entire way through.
"Don't do that" he rasps, yanking you by the hair again, as of punishment, but he knows you enjoy it, "you promised you'd be good"
You can't answer, so instead, you reach the head of his cock again, and now his eyes roll back, mumbling profanities that sound like heaven.
"Do you want them to hear us, brat? Qué necia eres" he manages to chastise while moaning.
You feel his dick stuck in your throat, and the way he's about to come; you think that after some time dating, you know him well enough.
You're about to leave with your mouth when he stops you.
"No" your eyes open in shock, "what? Did you think your punishment is over?" Pedro laughs, "don't look at me like that. Like you have never done it before"
He keeps you in place by the hair, the rings prickling against your scalp. You feel his muscles tense up, and before you can think anything else thick and hot shots of cum invade your mouth, making it sticky and warm.
"Don't pretend you don't like it" his voice goes dark, husky. "Swallow it all. Te han enseñado a no desperdiciar nada, ¿verdad? Show me your good manners, then"
When you pull out, your throat feels raspy.
"You gotta reward me" you cough out.
"I promised, didn't I?" his fingers trace your face delicately, with adoration.
"It's all about duty, General Acacius" you purr, and the dick springs out again. Hard.
"Princess..." he warns.
"For the glory of Rome" you joke and laugh, then cough, as your throat is still sore.
"Have you been reading my script?" as you avoid to answer, he just chuckles, "ay, nena"
"C'mere" he motions, and you sit on his lap again. Pedro lifts your dress, exploring the curve of your ass. There's anticipation as he hooks his finger around the waistband of your panties, pulling them down to access your core.
"Fuck" you squirm at his touch, grinding your freed cunt against his hard cock. He grabs you by the hip, adjusting you right on his lap.
"You taste so good" he kisses down your throat, ending at the chest were your tits peak.
"Want them?" you offer, pulling your dress down. He kisses them, gently nipping at your perked up nipples.
A wave of pleasure courses through you, and with whines and moans, you show how desperate you are, the hunger making the meal taste better. After all those weeks missing him, you just want him to fuck you senseless.
His lips are rosy and swollen against yours, mouths clashing; starved of the yearned contact. Truth is, no matter how much you know how to touch yourself, it'll never be the same as having his hard cock tear through your tight folds.
Pedro easily aligns his leaking cock with your uncovered pussy, all while mantaining the kiss. He pushes down on you, your dripping cunt taking all of his rock-hard cock, fingers holding onto the soft brown grey sprinkled locs.
"Pedro" you cry out his name, full of ecstasy as the stretch burns so sweetly. His low grunts only fuel your desire.
You trace with your eyes his body, now bare without the upper part of the costume: his pecs and abs, flexing with every pump. With now free hands, your fingers travel to softly caress his stomach, even if your tits are jiggling and the pace is rather frenetic.
"I missed you so much" you pout.
"Missed how you look" you clash your lips onto his, the adoration translating through the smile you press against, a trail of saliva that symbolizes how interwined you are, "you always look so fucking good"
"I missed you too" he whispers out, getting tired.
He's reminded of his old age, forgetting about it as soon as you two kiss, because you bring out a stamina he thinks he doesn't have anymore; almost animalistic. His bones creak and adding the tiring filming day under the hot sun, he feels his body start to give up, the orgams closer and closer.
He blushes, feeling like a stupid school boy with a crush. What did he even do to deserve you? Never thought a pretty young wild thing like you would even spare a glance on his way, but now you're taking all of his cock inside with such greed yet loom into his eyes with a love he's only dreamed of.
You're real, and his.
As soon as those words leave your mouth your orgasm spills over him, some of it dripping onto the skirt, making him curse. You can't stop, still meeting his thrusts halfway, despite your trembling body after reaching your high.
"Mierda" he groans against your mouth,
You feel yourself collapsing on top of him, the weight of the jet lag catching up.
"Getting tired, baby?" he coos. "Shit, and I thought I was old"
"You are" you reply back; you can never not have the last word. And he lets you, because, God, doesn't he love you? He pretends to look offended by it, but the way your eyes shine tell him you didn't mean it that way. "You and your white hairs" tracing over his moustache, a soft hand combing through his locks, "These wrinkles... don't you know how much I love them? how much I love you?"
"And you have no idea how much I love you" he squeezes his eyes shut, feeling it coming through. "God, wanna make you mine. Sólo mía" his pace slows. It's coming, and yes, you will take it all. "Wanna make you a baby, mami. Want you to take it all like the good girl you are"
When he comes, filling you with burning hot cum until you feel like you might burst, you're numb. But there's a feeling so content that pools warmth in your chest, that you can't say anything else, resting your head against his bare chest, both covered in sticky sweat.
"No sé cómo voy a explicar esto" he speaks through ragged breathes, and you can only smirk, "a squirted and cummed roman skirt".
"That isn't my problem" he scoffs, and you feel your head rise against the movement, earning a laugh out of you, "I'm not part of the movie"
"You'd sure think so, with the way you walked in here"
You roll your eyes, face hidden against his chest, "can you let that go?"
"You're right" he pulls you closer to him, hand enveloping you behind your bare back. The quiet doesn't bother you as you lie closer to his chest, his heartbeat the only thing you need to be at peace, "I think punishment time is over. Think you've learned your lesson"
"Then, how about we go out? I've heard Malta's beaches are pretty"
"Relájate, cariño. Seems you've gotten your energy back" he quips, then kisses your forehead. "We need to wait for everyone to get out"
"That embarrased you are of me?" you joke.
"No" he can already imagine his fellow cast members making fun of him, starting with Paul and Joseph when they see you and Connie who will totally notice the fun sticky stains on the costume, "but embarrased of the explanation I'll have to give"
#dilfistwrites#gladiator II#gladiator ii#gladiator 2#pedro pascal#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal fanfic#pedro pascal smut#pedro pascal x you#pedro x reader#pedro pascal fluff#marcus acacius#joseph quinn#connie nielsen#may calamawy#paul mescal#i love him#so down bad for my latino man#pls excuse the filth<3
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18+ Sometimes I get an idea in my head and you'll hear 10 versions of the same thing, word for word, I swear (iykyk). I'm sorry. Just a little in coming fluff, angst and smuttt. We're giving him the ending he always deserved. This is a mess of my brain vomit.
Sergeant Barnes who can't help the crush he has on the sweet nurse stationed at his camp, always finding ways to talk to her, even if it means interrupting her in the middle of the way, wagging his finger around the tent because he has a dire papercut.
She'll patch him up every single time with a shake of her head, telling him to be more careful and he'll say yes mam, just to be back in the same cot the next day like clockwork.
Sergeant Barnes who walks her to her quarters every evening and bids her goodnight with a tip of his hat, always a gentleman. He never misses an opportunity to hold the door open, fetch extra supplies, grinning all while she tells him to get back to his work, worried he'll get in trouble for always helping her.
Sergeant Barnes who has a flirty little mouth on him, never missing a moment to tell her how lovely she looks. She dismisses everything he says, after all there's no way he could see her that way when she's sweating, covered in grime and blood aftering bandaging up different men.
Sergeant Barnes who wonders if she feel the same way when catches a tear roll down her cheek the first time she has to sew his injures. Her hands work quick and steadily keeping a straight face until the last dressing is placed across his abdomen. He's seen her do the same thing to plenty of others, sending them on their way right after but not him. She checked over him again and then once more, insisting he rest for an additional night before he was off again.
Sergeant Barnes who didn't realize it would get this far. He only intended to kiss her, he really did but the surprised little whine she let out was too much. How could he left her go when he hands clutched onto his uniform tighter, lips parted, letting his tongue lace with hers.
He made love to her that night.
Sergeant Barnes who took his time touching every bit of her body with softness, laying her in bed and covering her with the sheet when she shyly looked away. He didn't need much more than that, happy to feel her bare skin on his while he felt her lips flutter against his neck, he may as well have died and gone to heaven.
Sergeant Barnes who doesn't rush a thing while he pumps his cock, letting his swollen head rub though her slit while letting her know much he adores her. How perfect she already is. She whispers a please in his ear and he starts to push himself inside, his length already throbbing with need.
"I know angel, I know" He coos at the gasp she lets out, his hand coming up to caress her cheek, his thumb stroking her skin. "S'just me doll, s'just me you're feeling"
He stretches her slowly, after all his sweet angel has never felt anyone else. Her face hides in his neck, panting as he fully sheaths himself, cuddling her body, rubbing her back.
"S-so big, Sergeant" is the best she can get out and he has to force himself to not cum on the spot. He starts to move, holding her tighter because he didn't expect to struggle this much.
"I love you" He rasps out, it's all he can say without running his mouth, spewing all the things that were in his head. He really can't take it. His mind is working faster than he can comprehend. There were a thousand sweet things but that wasn't the issue. He bit his tongue from confessing she caused all his wet dreams, making him feel like a teenager all over again. That her pussy was so tight, he was leaking in her. That it felt too good, he felt like a virgin too, his cock was so sensitive like never before, fuck, she had to unlock her ankles that were wrapped around his waist-
"M'close" He pants, eyes locked with hers hoping she understands- "M'gonna cum, I-fuck, i'm cu-mph" His eyes grow wide in surprise when she tugs his dog tags and pulls him down for a kiss, her legs still wrapped around him, every bit of his cum filling her up.
"I love you too" she nuzzles her nose with his, relaxing in his hold as they drift off to sleep.
He holds her extra tight that night.
There was a war happening and tomorrow wasn't always promised.
Especially not when he had an assignment the next day.
-
Sergeant Barnes who dragged himself through hell and back, limping half sewn up with that cute little blush on his face cause he can't wait to see her again after months of nearly dying, losing men, the only thing that kept him going was getting to see-
Where was she?
"Has anyone seen Nurse y/l/n?" He frowned when the other nurses shook their heads as he searched, his worry increasing when he finds her things gone. He nearly sends off a search party until a close friend of hers quietly gives him an address. She says very little, only sending him off with a wink and a good luck.
He's utterly baffled when he sees the address is that of his own? Surely there was a mistake. That doesn't mean he'll waste anytime. The war was over anyway, injuries be damned, he's moving as fast as he can.
He sets off home, knocking on the door, his can't wait to find her again and he's missed his family soo much-
"Jamie!!" His sister throws her arms around his neck and he stumbles back, hugging her tightly, "Mama, Jamie's home!!" He doesn't let go of her as his mother runs to him from the kitchen, tears already streaming down her face.
"Sweet boy" She takes his face in her hands, looking him up and down. Her baby boy is back in one piece and that's all that matters.
Well, sort of.
"I missed you ma-ow!"
"I raised you better, you worried those poor angels to bits"
Angels?
He isn't given a chance to ask anything when she gives him a wack with a rolled newspaper, ushering him to go to his room, slipping something into his pocket before sending him off.
Sergeant Barnes who can't believe his eyes when he sees her again. Her pretty face. Same perfect eyes. Perfect nose. Perfect lips. All of it turns blurry from unshed tears because the only thing that was different now was a very round baby bump.
"Y'came back" Her voice melts into a sob seeing him standing at the doorway.
"I missed ya" He whispers against her hairline, kissing her repeatedly, his hands cradling her rounded belly, his little baby kicking against his touch. "M'so sorry angel, wish I was here-
"You're here now" she sniffled, inhaling his scent after waiting for him to come back, not knowing if he was hurt or alive, the thought breaking her heart. "We waited"
"Daddy's here" He kisses her tummy, holding her extra close again after months of waiting. Dreaming. Hoping.
He asks her to marry him. His ma wouldn't give him her wedding ring for just anyone.
A baby boy. 2 years later, a little girl. She asks for a kitten. They name her Alpine. Another little boy 3 years later.
Perfect.
#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x f!reader#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes fanfiction#40s bucky#40's bucky#40s bucky barnes#40s bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes fan fic#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes angst#bucky fluff#bucky fan fic#bucky fan fiction#bucky fanfic#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes x fanfic#bucky barnes smut#marvel smut#marvel#marvel fic#marvel fanfic#marvel fanfiction#avengers fluff
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Whenever i am told thangs abt the leech i just go. What an embarrassing person gosh
#iykyk#god damn#The stupidest and most oblivious person ive ever came in relatively close contact with /gen. With several ppl who know them irl agreeing#i kind of feel bad they dont even realize this but not gonna bother myself with it its just me going damn#unfortunate#apparently they are under impression im a lurker. one of their MANY projections but possibly the funniest/most pathetic one#i literally did not see their blog/crs blog since waaay back when we were still getting along#i have 0 reason to go in their spaces#last ive heard they were obsessively going thru tags on my posts day in and out#at work out of work#that makes ONE lurker in all this haha even crink knew to stop at some point LMAO#literally all i know is from ppl telling me soz m8#osmosis#just. the fact they believe ppl care enough to lurk on them is really funny in a sad way#ive been told they are paranoid abt one of their followers or something?#theyre nobody i know but stay paranoid ig#the assumption ppl would care enough#i was chortling while having old pellets read out for me#i would have to be insane to care abt what someone like that says#by which i mean an undiagnosed unmanaged shut in#quote /the universe hates them/#definitely nothing to do with them being a mess#fitting that they have an alter ego/sona that is just their bad traits concentrated#like yeah. why are we even upset LMAO#projection town on their end allllllll the way it just screams /unwell and out of the loop/#they dont know... ajajaj...#night was not happy abt that post no surprise there#YES they are enabling infidelity yes they are inserting themself. was supposed to stay in the house a few months and now. poor night jfc#nine months to go is too long#im so glad she told them
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