#do I have a god complex
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Have you seen my little lad?
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jin zixun#Everytime I have to write his name I feel like I'm running outside in a blood rain trying not to get wet. Misspelling it feels so inevitabl#But so far so good! He doesn't have too many more appearances before he gets Cheesed.#Dear god I love it when characters go on the war path for someone they care about.#And I love it even more when you have an ambiguity between personal debt and genuine act of selflessness.#WWX saving WN is purposefully messy! Like a lot of our real life reasons for how we act - there isn't a clear single cause or answer.#Sometimes we forget that we are a collection of experiences and learnt reactions.#Sometimes we forget that what we see on the surface is not the point to address. Everyone is more complex than we think. Even yourself.#And yet...it always comes back to love doesn't it? Attachment styles and self-esteem and bonds and relationships to others.#Everything comes back to love and our perceptions of it.#WWX is on a self-destructive war path and he will absorb as much damage as he can for those he feels obligated and attached to.#Does it make him feel needed? Does it give him purpose? Does it ease anxieties of the past? I do not think there is an answer.
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my job is complete when i become irrelevant
#do I have a god complex#is this a normal thoughts#lol#gay#thoughts#irrelevant#shower thoughts#quote#god complex
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I want a Dead Boy Detectives rewrite fic, except Edwin and Charles have been dating for about 20 years, but absolutely nobody can tell, and every damn chapter they have to explain that Yes, we are dating, No, this isn't a new thing, catch up.
#like not even niko catches on at first#jenny does though#she meets the boys and she's immediately like “oh ok”#speaking of#i want more jenny interactions with the boys#they deserve bitchy goth big sister too god dammit#dead boy detectives#dead boy detective agency#dbda#charles rowland#edwin payne#payneland#charles rowland x edwin payne#shit talker talks#Cat King : Do you have a special friendship?#Edwin : I like to think it's a little more complex than thag but okay#Niko : You do know two boys can like-like each other right?#Edwin : Why does everyone assume I don't know about gay people????
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fingon, who was left behind and abandonend by just about anyone in his family at some point, who died alone because maedhros did not return to him in time either. how many times can you be second choice no matter how little it is about you and not have that fester into bitter, bitter anger. how much worse does it get, at some point, that it isn't even about you but you simply matter less than whatever else was more important just then. how long can you cling to the rationale before you always see everyone with one foot already out of the door. how long can you keep loving and loving and loving despite,until there is nothing left to give. and then keep giving anyway because, after all, you know what it's like to be abandonend
#*mine#mona rambles#tolkien#silm#fingon#anyway i'm fine why do you ask#like. important to me that this is not a judgment of the reasons why people left him/didn't return/etc#in most cases it really wasn't anyone's want or even decision#and obviously there were times where fingolfin crossed the ice for him! turgon opened gondolin!! and yet.#and YET. how many times until it starts scraping you raw regardless you know#i just think fingon. the complexities. the nuance. the anger and the abandonment issues and the pretending and!!!!#do you get it. shaking you. god. goddddddddd. my GUY#great wednesday night to have yet another breakdown over him end the day how you started it i guess
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Okay, so Apollo? We all know him, right? God of the sun, light, poetry, and one too many other fucking things? Including truth, knowledge, logic, and education?
Yeah, how are we all forgetting who the God of fucking Education and Logic is? Please, for the love of everything holy, stop characterizing Apollo as a dumb blond who can’t do shit on his own and whose only traits are pride, vanity, anger issues, and being horny because he is so much more than that and this is really getting out of hand. I’ve read too many damned fics and posts where everyone treats and characterizes Apollo as an immature teenager and I am just so fucking over it. He is such a complex character and we all really need to stop reducing him to a blond dumb-dumb.
#pjo#apollo#greek mythology#greek gods#STOP CHARACTERIZING GODS AS IDIOTS#FUCKING HELL PEOPLE STOP FALLING FOR THIS TRAP#They are all so FUCKING complex just like us humans#So STOP simplifying them to idiots with anger issues#I literally cannot say this enough#STOP MAKING ALL OF THE GODS HAVE PERSONALITIES FLATTER THAN A SINGULAR PIECE OF PAPER!!!!!!!#Just do your fucking research people please
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Someone needs to say it: The "Heaven is actually bad" plot line that Hazbin is based around is useless when you spend more then 2 minutes thinking about Vivzie's Hell and her characters.
Besides it being much too early for this idea, the revelation that Heaven or at least the beings running it aren't good people has little to no impact when the people who are being harmed by this are all horrible people. Stay with me here. None of these people are people who were unfairly brought into hell and we are never ever introduced to someone who was either. Why should we care that Heaven is "evil" and blocking redemption when all the sinners in hell we see are the worst of the worst who would have never gotten in even if it was fair.
For the "Heaven is bad" plot line to actually work, you need people who were just one sin away from Heaven, who would've gotten into Heaven if circumstance hadn't forced them down a path that stole it from them. You need characters who aren't comedic villains but land in the middle of morally grey. Those who deserved to be in Heaven but because Heaven refused to consider their circumstances, they were tossed to burn with people much worse than them. Those are the people who should be your main cast cause those are the people who would actually be impacted by Heaven being bad/ Heaven lying.
Angel dust, for all his trauma, was still part of the mafia and likely had killed people before (showing to almost take joy in it). Husk became an overlord and gambled souls, so he had to have had blood on his hands before hell. Alastor is a serial killer, and the list goes on and on. Sure, these characters are (somewhat) interesting, but they don't make for good characters to have when the key plot line is that Heaven is a scam. Even if that fact is true, none of them were ever going to get there in the first place and this is something we also se in every single background sinner shown in Hell too. They were never close to getting there, so why would they or we care that Heaven is bad when all sinners are shown to be horrific people who are at best in the dark grey area of morality.
If you look at it from the "angel's are unfairly killing sinners" route, it still doesn't work. If the angels are killing them, what makes it different then the sinner on sinner violence that hell is full off? Why is them dying by angels this bad thing when they are just as likely if not 10x times more likely to get knifed in the back by other sinners in hell the other 364 days, especially when everyone here apparently is just as horrible as the next person. You cannot condemn the angels for killing demons and then make a joke of out sinners killing each other and never show sinners who doesn't want to kill people. Life either matters or it doesn't and when the main cast doesn't even show a care for life (outside of Charlie's who's entire flaw is her naivety), why should the audience.
On top of that, Vivzie's whole overpopulation aspect and the Heaven plot line would connect better if she actually had people like those I mentioned above, people who stole to survive but got tossed out cause stealing is technically wrong, people who killed another to protect someone else but were still sent to hell because even though they saved that person's life that person wasn't supposed to be saved, people who passively engaged in sins but never really did anything harmful under them. This would add into how Hell is so overpopulated and highlight why its so important that Heaven is evil/ why Charlie's plan isn't just a naive pathetic fever dream.
In the end, Vivzie should have never made Heaven the central plot of this show nor tried to assign this blatant good vs evil to that conflict. Neither her characters nor her writing choices are able to respond to this conflict in a way that will end or even tell the story in a satisfactory manner.
#anti hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel critical#vivziepop critical#spindlehorse critical#spindlehorse criticism#also I am not just talking out my ass for this#I had/have this same problem in one of my original works#where I had to make the relationship between Heaven and God and cambion a lot more complex then just oh this side bad this side good#and thats what you have to do as a fucking writer is ask the hard question and be ready to scrap characters and ideas to answer them#When you deal with human characters nothing is black vs white and the minute you claim it is#you have failed
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And where THE FUCK were Y’ALL????
#if these two idiots aren’t dragging ivan through the sewers right now i swear to god—#what has this duo accomplished recently?? QUICKLY#doing straight cardio in the alien stage complex my goodness#put some points on the board#sorry guys im having a moment#alien stage#alnst#alien stage dewey#alien stage isaac#alnst dewey#alnst isaac#alien stage round 7#alnst round 7#alien stage spoilers#alnst spoilers#ivanttakethis talks too much
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#feels good to have a representation of how i am watching critical role sometimes#i am just so bad at names and complex lore i forget so much i do fear#anyway literal perfect seating choice no!!!!! notes!!!! god i love them#robbie stay forever#critical role#critical role memes#bells hells#robbie daymond#sam reigel
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Lawrence of Arabia (1962) dir. David Lean
#Lawrence of Arabia#filmedit#perioddramaedit#loaedit#*#*gif#okay a few things#1) I love love love Peter O'Toole's line reading of ''I don't want to be part of your big push''#2) I love how this conversation figuratively and literally opens old wounds#3) Dryden calling Allenby's attention to the wounds without showing to Lawrence what he's doing#4) ''I have no Arab friends'' the man with the messiah complex is denying his proverbial disciples#(a reversal of the disciple Peter's denial of the Messiah)#5) ''I just want my ration of common humanity'' tying in with the themes of god complexes/messiah complexes vs. well. common humanity#(a few lines earlier we have ''The truth is I'm an ordinary man'')#anyways. you guys heard of this movie? it's really good
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I genuinely want to know what show the people who say that Aang never respected Katara are watching. "Aang never let Katara feel anything other than what he wanted her to feel" "He idealized her" "He didn't care about her feelings" "He didn't support her the way she supported him". WHERE ARE YOU GETTING THIS FROM??? That's a rhetorical question because I already know what episodes/moments they're using to make those assertions (The Southern Raiders and the kiss in Ember Island Players), and even then, THEY'RE WRONG.
Let's start with TSR. This episode gets so misinterpreted it's not even funny. First off, Aang was never even upset with Katara in this episode, he's just warning her against killing someone??? He never gets mad at her or berates her. He just talks to her with a level head??? He openly acknowledges that he knows and understands how much rage and pain Katara is in, and he never tells her that she shouldn't feel it, he just advises her not to act rashly because of it??? Where is the lack of respect? Where is he ignoring her feelings or getting upset with her for not acting the way he wants her to? He lets her take Appa and even tells her that he understands that this is a journey she needs to take and supports her doing so, he just doesn't want her to kill someone. Honestly Aang shows more respect for Katara by knowing who she is as a person and not enabling her in her revenge than Zuko who is only going on this trip with her so that she'll forgive him, not because he actually cares that she's upset over the death of her mother (and this is not Zuko slander before people take it as such, I love Zuko, but it's not even subtext that his motivations in this episode are selfish and not about Katara).
As for the kiss in EIP, yes, it was not okay. Yes, it was a mistake. Yes, he shouldn't have done it after Katara laid a clear boundary, but he recognizes that immediately. After Katara- rightfully- gets upset with him, he gets upset with himself. We also see that he never repeats that mistake again and is fully okay with letting Katara lead after that. Which is why it's Katara who initiates the final kiss on the balcony. And if you still don't think he learned anything from it, he starts to ask for her consent in the comics before kissing her, showing that he absolutely DID grow from that mistake. So, we're really going to let one moment where a 12-year-old boy made a mistake dictate the entire show and negate everything that came before it??? That's coocoo banana's behavior.
I also think that those assertions are completely baseless because when does Aang idealize Katara? When does he hate her rage? When does he not support her? Is it when he laughed with her after she stole from pirates? Or in that same episode where he constantly reaffirms her skills as a waterbender- first by saying that he's able to pick it up so easily because she's a great teacher and then later when he refers to her as a waterbender which makes her so fucking happy? Is it when he gets so upset that Pakku refuses to teach Katara how to waterbend that he tries to walk away from his own waterbending training? Is it when he goes behind Pakku's back to teach her anyway? Or when he stands by actively cheering her on when she's raging against the patriarchy and fights Pakku? Is it when he calls her Sifu Katara because she expressed that he referred to Toph that way but not her? Is it when he helped her commit ecoterrorism and told her she was a hero for helping the people in that Fire Nation village? Is it when he holds her after she breaks down because she learned how to bloodbend? Is it when he comforts her after Jet's death? Is it... you get the point, don't you?
Aang recognizing Katara as someone who is strong and capable is not him idealizing her. Him not enabling her committing murder is not him hating when she feels rage. Aang actively supports Katara's rage on multiple occasions, he just doesn't enable her when he knows she's acting out of character. If you don't ship Kataang, that's fine, but please don't make up baseless accusations to try and tear them down just because you're mad that a ship that had no basis in canon (potential is not evidence) wasn't canon.
#kataang#anti zutara#for the tags#because people are crazy#and I don't have the time or energy to deal with it#pro kataang#pro aang#aang defense squad#katara x aang#this isn't even about not letting people ship what they want to ship#it really is just about people who bend over backwards to rewrite canon and hate on these characters in order to justify their ship#let them breathe for god's sake#adding here that i saw someone say that Aang treats Katara like the madonna and i 🧍🏻♀️🧍🏻♀️🧍🏻♀️#PLEASE DEVELOP MEDIA LITERACY SKILLS IM BEGGING#DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT THE MADONNA/WHORE COMPLEX IS???#GENUINELY BC WHEN?? WHEN DOES HE DO THAT???#*cries in english major*
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Gotham War is really playing out like God’s plan, ain’t it now
Task Force Z #4 (2022)
#different storylines being connected by themes that carryover. 👌🏻#bothered him so much he outright destroyed Jason’s access to free will#Rosenberg has a way of putting in some of the most satisfyingly well-put lines#that other writers could never have Jason say to Bruce#jason todd#red hood#dc#task force z#tfz#but also such a classic abuser move: everything you say being extremely self-centered#‘me *my* city *my* orders *I* don’t want you doing that’#then when you get called out for being a manipulative shit you say ‘I’m sorry YOU see it that way’ like suddenly it’s you not me huh#Bruce should make a failsafe that could cure his god complex#he needs some humbling
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Down To Fish with the boys!
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan xichen#lan wanji#jiang cheng#su she#The temptation to put Supermega's DTF as the song link was strong but I don't know if the uninitiated are ready for that psychic damage#I think I landed on something with different but compatible vibes B*)#I honestly forgot this was *the* su she scene. What a forgettable man#Pathetic sopping wet meow meow (derogatory)#Hat wise lwj probably would have a bucket hat to match lxc- but lets go with “he forgot it and borrowed one of wwx's”#This is by far one of the most complex comics i have made for this series#3x the amount I usually do....sadly not the most sustainable for me right now#The idea was funny at the time but my god was this self indulgent#Bonus continuity joke; I think its very funny to think that mxy!wwx probably gave away his identity way more times than he realizes#He would *not* survive in hannah montana's prediciment
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He's very fun at parties..
inspired by @okultraoldmanyaoi 's (and someone else I think but I can't remember their username) take on gary's breakdowns (i cant stop thinking about that since i saw that post)
#i love doodling at night ugh#gary miller#garyjohn#i know gary is all silly but i do love the massive layers of complexity he has as the root of his character#he would have no issue talking about how God treated him unfairly but having to explain that to JOHN of all people..#john brings something mid convo and gary grips the table LMWAOOO
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jealousy really is the driving force of DamiTim as a ship. love that for them. love how Tim has the Robin mantle ripped away from him and he has to suffer the jealousy of watching Dick and Damian bond. how possessive over Dick Tim can be, to have him stolen by Dick.
even more so though, is the jealousy from Damian. how on earth do you cope when you finally get to be Robin, a role you've convinced is your birthright, and no one really likes you? every prefers the Robin who came before you? Dick regularly reminds you that he can always go and call Tim back when you act out? like the complex Damian has over Tim is unreal. Tim, who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth and had everything handed to him his whole life. he never had to struggle or fight for his place like Damian did. Damian has spent his whole life fighting and proving himself, and yet he can't ever seem to truly claw the mantle of Robin away from Tim. even when Tim lets it go, becomes Red Robin, they seem to share it. Tim can slip back into the role of Robin whenever someone like Dick or Bruce need him to, because *he's* the Robin who they need. he's the Robin who was able to find Bruce. he's the Robin that Ra's wants an heir out of. he's the Robin who even Jason respects. in Damian's eyes, everything Damian has fought tooth and nail for, was handed to Tim.
so of course he's going to react to Tim with violence and aggression, especially after finding out Tim has contingency plans for him. no matter how much Damian proves himself, he's never going to be enough, especially not to Tim. and so his deep refusal to see Tim as family, to acknowledge Tim's legacy is all driven by such an angry jealousy. Tim understands aspects of Bruce's legacy that Damian doesn't, like the need to sweet talk and play nice with the elites of Gotham, even if they're corrupt. they exemplify different aspects of Robin, and the aspects that Tim exemplifies are the aspects that Damian knows he'll never fully understand and therefore holds such a deep contempt for. he wants to fight criminals, not play nice with politicians. Tim understands the side of Gotham that's utterly foreign to Damian. if anything, he represents that side of Gotham, to Damian. a pretty little rich boy who's nothing but a know-it-all and not a real son of Bruce. he can't be a Wayne. he can't be Damian's family.
and all of that angry jealousy leading to unhealthy obsession turned a weird, angry crush from Damian is just my bread and butter. that is how DamiTim should be. to me. Damian obsessed over hating Tim Drake so much he accidentally ends up sort of in love with him and that only makes Damian angrier. because he can't prove everyone right by *also* liking Tim. he can't let Ra's win like that, because frankly why wouldn't Ra's be delighted by Damian and Tim getting together. and it builds and builds with angry passive aggression towards Tim that culminates in angry hate-fucking-that's-not-just-driven-by-hate. love and hate are always viewed as opposites in shipping and i think they're the same intense passion just in different directions. and for the best ships, they're very intertwined. what is DamiTim is not the peak of that. "i put so much of myself into hating you i had no choice but to fall in love with you somewhere along the way" core. love that bleeds into hate and hate that bleeds into love. "you make me so angry i regularly passively try to kill you but not with any real effort because who would i obsess over if you were actually gone" core. murder attempts as a form of courting. contingency plans to take each other out as a love language. they're unwell.
#necrotic festerings#damitim#timdami#tim drake x damian wayne#damian wayne x tim drake#also possibly a hint of dicktim at the beginning there#i have yelled at my partner about them nonstop#so i had to put the thoughts into a tumblr post to give them peace.#i clearly favor tim in my ships we don't need to talk about it#tim drake is so weird he makes everyone else weird about him by proxy.#like sir contain that aura it's making everyone mentally ill.#i'm not a hamilton girlie at all which is why it makes me so mad Wait For It is SUCH good song for damian#like that song just IS his complex over tim#whether canon or shipping#this pulls from a variety of canon btw#like yeah mostly pre-flashpoint#but i do think the fact that in current comics canon tim keeps defaulting back to being robin#must make damian SO mentally unwell#like oh that does not help your jealousy complex does it.#and the thoughts of tim understanding the elite in ways damian doesn't are inspired by the boy wonder (2024)#which GOD is the first modern comic to fucking understand how tim and damian actually feel about each other#in a way that isn't either cartoonishly evil or makes them make up too easily#ugh. juni ba your mind.#anyway the complex damian has over tim. is fucking wild.#bc like everyone uses it to woobify poor tim for being attacked by big mean damian#which first of all stop taking panels out of context#second of all#dude no WONDER damian has a complex. i'd hate tim's ass too!!!#when i was reading batman & robin (2009) and dick casually says he can still call tim when damian acts out#what kind of threat IS that dick. sir.
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Setting aside the knee-jerk 'eeeeew you're in love with your cousin' reaction to Daeran's illusion in Areelu's Lab, I need to talk a second about what a profoundly telling character moment that is for both Daeran and Galfrey.
Daeran refers to Galfrey as the 'Queen of his dreams' and mentions it being twisted by demon logic when questioned. It makes sense that demons would immediately latch on to a psychosexual implication, but it's not about having a crush on her.
The desire to have Galfrey 'out of her armor' is the desire to reconnect with the last member of his family.
He mentions when you ask about his Mother that she was a 'real' mother as opposed to a 'Countess' mother, implying that she was less interested in raising him to be a Proper Noble and more interested in just being present as his only parent. This is indicated in the glimpses we see of his younger self at the party, and in his often-stated resentment towards the necessities of 'proper comportment.'
Galfrey also mentions how close she was to Silaena, referring to her as a 'real' family member, the only person she was truly close to. From the way both of them speak about her, Silaena Arendae was a central, stabilizing part of both of their lives. Galfrey also mentions what a sweet boy Daeran was as a small child, implying a much closer relationship than the current mutual polite revulsion. @thedosianexplorer surmised to me that it's likely Galfrey was once a beloved, comforting figure in young Daeran's life, and I agree. How could she be anything else to the son of someone she so loved? And how awful must it have been to both of them to have that taken away?
Losing the rest of their noble family was certainly a blow, but neither of them even mention their names. The moment Silaena died, however, that was when they were both orphaned. What makes it all the more tragic is the grief that could have brought them closer only served to completely sever their familial connection.
Galfrey has no clue about the true reason Daeran clings so desperately to enjoying life; all she knows is that he may have physically survived but the child she loved was very much dead with the rest of them - in its place an irresponsible, flippant, spoiled brat unwilling to fill the space Silaena left behind. Daeran has no way of communicating the truth to Galfrey, and acts resentfully towards who or whatever else she puts her attention towards, while flaunting his lifestyle at every opportunity.
His lifestyle, as such, is an Emperor's Wardrobe of red flags, but it's hard to see those flags through tunnel vision stained with demon blood. Neither of them are allowed to mourn, but at least Daeran can try to be happy. But as for Galfrey, thedosianexplorer put it best in this hypothetical line:
'How dare you let yourself be happy, I haven't let myself be happy since your mother died.'
The tragedy is that Daeran's need for secrecy and Galfrey's state- and self- imposed martyrdom has created an impenetrable armor between them, and I think is at the heart of the loneliness they both feel. The cruelty of that moment, where the dream of connection is twisted into a mean joke, still sits with me.
#pathfinder wotr#pf wotr#wotr daeran#daeran arendae#queen galfrey#wotr galfrey#Inspired by someone's reaction video to that scene lol#yeah yeah gross yeah whatever ANYWAY WHAT DOES THIS SAY ABOUT THE CHARACTER#shrieking and rattling the bars of my cage#it's good writing folks#their relationship is so complex and so SAD#like no matter what you do or how good the endings are for either of them#they just never reconcile as far as I know#the only way they have a decent familial relationship is if you reset the whole god damn timeline#and that is so fucking sad to me#i mean if you do ship it please by all means freak it up#i'm just here to roll around in the tragedy of it all#navel gazing
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Being yelled at by some clerk as if you're a twelve year old who didn't do her homework while you're a grown woman is a surreal experience.
#like fuck off I won't explain myself where it doesn't concern you#you behave like you know anything about me#you're an arsehole on a power trip madam#jabbernaty#why do office workers always treat you like you're some archvillain who ruined their life took all their money and killed their dog?#in the whole office there's always one (1) chill person who's willing to help you#the rest just want your arteries#and I get it if I were rude or something but I was polite and tired#I just want to live in peace and not to be depressed#I don't have the energy to deal with your god complex#let me be
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