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tefilovesreading · 4 years ago

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Long overdue. Charlie Gillespie x OC

A/N: I’m really happy to finally share this one, it took me a while to finish it but I’m proud with the final result. I hope you love it as much as I do.

Summary: Charlie and Olivia used to be best friends, until he left their hometown to pursue his acting career without saying goodbye to his best friend, ruining their friendship. They meet again four years later.

Word count: +6k

Warning: some swearing, mention of a panic attack, angst????

Special thanks to my lovely @theamazingtomholland for helping me out and your sweet words! Also thanks to @thelawiswiththerose !!

MASTERLIST

When Olivia was just a kid, her grandfather used to joke about how she would grow up to become a historian because her memory was amazing,and she believed him. Until she realized that she had an excellent memory only when it came to things that matter to her or that made her the young woman she was now. She remembered meeting her current best friend on April 7th,four years ago. She knew her heart got broken for the first time on March 31st when she was only fifteen, it was a Monday, and she didn’t cry because she needed to get through her classes. Or how she lost a piece of herself when her grandpa died when she was just five years old on May 31st.

She unlocked her phone and felt her heart get a little bit heavier when she saw the date on the screen:

August 26.

Four years ago, when they both were eighteen, things were easier for sure, at least for Charlie. Olivia wasn’t doing bad either but seeing her childhood best friend kiss another girl in front of her wasn’t something she enjoyed. How could someone watch the person they’ve loved for years kiss someone else and not feel like they were getting their heart crushed little by little?

They spent the day with their friends, celebrating Charlie’s last birthday near the river before he moved to Toronto to pursue his acting career a week later. Olivia could still remember how happy he looked sitting next to the bonfire; his arms wrapped around his then- girlfriend laughing about something his friend had said. Sat just across from them, giving the couple and herself some space, she knew her heart was going to break again that night. And it did because he ditched her at the end of the night when he was supposed to make sure she got home safely just like he promised her parents he would.

She remembered how scared she felt walking back home in the dark by herself even when she knew their neighbourhood was safe and she wasn’t far from her house. But she was terrified of darkness and Charlie was the only one in their group of friends that knew it. Olivia cursed his name over and over again for putting her in that position, for leaving her alone, and thinking about the reason made her feel sick. Of course, she knew why he left without telling her but admitting it out loud wasn’t something she was willing to do.

Her phone vibrated in her hand and she rubbed her eyes, making her put that memory away. It was her mother letting her know that their flight had just landed, and they were ready for their two weeks in the Caribbean.

“Seems like it’s gonna be just us, Peanut,” she whispered to the black dog curled up next to her on the couch. Scratching the dog’s belly, she turned her attention back to the TV where Meryl Streep was singing Money, Money, Money.

Her stomach growled, remembering that she barely had eaten something and it was already dinner time.

Noises outside her house caught her attention, they sounded a lot like laughs, instead of making her way to the kitchen, she went to the closest window and peeked outside just enough for her heart to drop.

He was there laughing without a care in the world, his hair falling back in messy waves that her fingers suddenly needed to touch.

Closing the curtains before her neighbors could see her, she wiped furiously the lonely tear that managed to escape from her eyes before it could leave a trail down her cheek.

What was he doing here? He was supposed to be in Los Angeles, not here. She made sure not to be in town whenever she thought he could come back, spending numerous mother’s days somewhere else, or making sure she wasn’t home for his mother’s birthday. Christmas was easier because her entire family gathered up in her grandma’s house every single year. But he never came back to their hometown for his birthday, until this year.

The anger she felt after his birthday four years ago came back like an earthquake, making her body tremble with the feeling she kept bottled up for so long.

It wasn’t just the fact that Charlie left her on her own when he promised to take her back home. He didn’t apologize the day after for leaving her alone or the day after that one. Hell, he didn’t try to talk to her that entire week and when the week came to its end, he just left, not even saying goodbye to her.

Charlie moved out and never looked back. As if he completely forgot about the girl that was his best friend since they both were eight years old. The same girl that stood up for him whenever the mean guys at their school made fun of him for not getting the part after his first couple auditions. The same girl he spent so many summers playing with, countless winters playing in the snow with her until they felt like their fingers were beyond frozen.

That was what she was hurt and mad about. He forgot about her existence and all the memories they ever made together. And Olivia couldn’t do the same because even if she hated to admit it, she still loved him, maybe not like she used to, but she still had love to give to the boy standing outside the house she used to spend so much of her free time when she was younger.

And because the universe was against her, the dog ran towards the front door, barking at it and letting her know that she wanted to go out for a walk.

“We can’t go now, baby,” she shushed Peanut, but the small dog didn’t try to pay attention to her words and kept barking and spinning in excitement. She wanted to go out now and not even a treat would make her change her mind, “you are so stubborn, Pea.”

Peanut was a small dog, but her barks were resonating all over the house, breaking the silence and she knew it was about time someone came and ringed the doorbell to make sure everything was alright. A fast exit, that was what she needed, she could put her earbuds on and pretend she was going for a run, give them a small nod if they still were outside and get out of there as fast as she could.

She put her sneakers on, put on some music, opened the door, and tugged lightly on the dog leash to make her dog walk. Not looking at the people standing in the driveway was a difficult task, because she never stopped greeting the rest of the Gillespie family. How could she? It wasn’t their fault that her friendship with Charlie went to shit.

“Hey!” Meghan called her and turning her head slowly she nodded at them and pointed to her earbuds as if she were on the phone.

Charlie looked at her and realized she was avoiding his eyes, not even acknowledging his presence. Looking at the way her features had changed, turning her into a beautiful young woman, the childish features were long gone, which let him know how long it has been since the last time he saw her in person. Her long light brown hair was now up to her shoulders and a few shades lighter. Watching her walk away made his heart ache in a way he didn’t feel since he moved out.

“I didn’t know the Gibson still lived here.” The words came out loud enough for his sister to listen to what he said, and she punched him in the arm.

“She made sure to be out of town every time you came home, dumbass,” making a grimace he nodded, not wanting to talk about the subject, “I still don’t understand what happened between you guys, you were really good friends, and I was sure you liked her as more than a friend.”

He rolled his eyes, knowing damn well Meghan wasn’t going to just drop it, “it’s none of your business.”

“My guess is you told her you liked her, and she rejected you,” Patrick said with a knowing look on his face. Charlie snorted and shook his head.

“Again,” he warned, “drop it, guys.” His brother held his hand up and went inside, leaving him alone with his younger sister.

“All I’m gonna say is you should try to not mess with her, Charlie,” Meghan held him by his arm, making sure he was paying attention to her word, “it was awful to see how sad and broken she was when you left and I know you said it’s none of my business, but I was her friend too and she pushed me away for whatever the fuck happened between you two.”

“I won’t, Meg,” he promised, guiding her inside so Olivia didn’t have to see him once she came back. But if he was being honest, he didn’t want to see the pain in her face she failed to hide when she saw him standing next to Meghan.

Sprinting back to her house, Olivia let out a sigh of relief when she saw that Charlie wasn’t outside anymore. She didn’t really know how to feel, sure she felt as angry as she did four years ago but seeing Charlie in person after so long brought a feeling she didn’t know how to describe. And of course, she wasn’t blind and knew that he looked even better than he did before he left, so that didn’t really help her situation.

Looking back to his house one last time, she caught him in the window, and he gave her a small smile she didn’t return. Instead, she unlocked the front door and slammed it shut. If Charlie thought that she would act as if nothing happened, he was wrong. Not even his smile could erase how betrayed she felt.

After a long early walk with Peanut the next day, she hoped she wouldn’t have to go out and run into Charlie again. The feeling that he was going to try and approach her the next time they ran into each other gave her goosebumps. Olivia knew that talking things out would make her feel a lot better, but she wasn’t ready to do it. He would want to know why she was so angry and hurt and that meant she would have to tell him she used to be in love with him and how betrayed she felt when he left without apologizing, leaving behind their friendship as if it meant absolutely nothing to him.

With an iced tea in one hand and a book in the other, she made herself comfortable in the hammock her father hanged every summer. Peanut was trying to catch her tail and the only noise Olivia could hear were the birds above her.

She lost track of time and Peanut’s barks brought her back to reality. Crouched in her garden was Charlie, trying to get the black dog to stay put so he could pet her, but she was too excited to see someone and was running around him and barking.

“What are you doing here?” her voice came out hoarse, her body too tense with Charlie just a few feet away.

“I wanted to say hi,” he responded without looking at her and still trying to pet Peanut.

“Peanut come here,” Olivia commanded, and the little dog ran up to her owner, “you need to leave.”

“C’mon, Liv,” Charlie stood up and looked at her with puppy eyes, “I just wanna talk.”

“Olivia,” she corrected him and picked up her dog, “you need to leave now.”

“Why?” he demanded to know once he saw her walking towards the door. She turned around stunned by his audacity.

“You have no right to be here, Charlie,” he raised his eyebrows, taken back at her harsh answer, “you don’t get to call me Liv or come into my house so I’m telling you again. Leave. Now.”

“Just listen to me, please,” Olivia shook her head and went inside, slamming the door behind her.

She was able to take a couple of steps away from the door when she had to kneel, feeling like she was about to pass out, her heart pounding fast in her chest and her lungs barely being able to hold air inside them. Peanut licked her face trying to calm her down, but the tears kept falling down her cheeks.

“Liv, please.” Charlie’s voice sounded worried on the other side of the door. “Let me in.” A whimpering sound came out of her mouth and the next thing she heard was the door being open.

She wished Charlie’s embrace could comfort her and calm her down, but she kept crying into her hands. Her heart too fragile now that Charlie was everywhere, his smell, his touch, and his voice were too much for her.

Charlie picked her up and took her to her bedroom. A strong feeling of nostalgia took over him when he saw the room hadn’t changed much, probably because she also moved out and moved on with her life after he left.

“I’ll get you a glass of water and then I’m gonna leave, I promise.” A scoff was all he received.

“As if you knew how to keep one,” she muttered with bitterness when she heard him leave her room.

He placed a glass of water on her nightstand, “do you want me to call my sister to keep you company?” she shook her head and closed her eyes too tired to keep fighting against him.

“Are you feeling better?” Charlie asked again and wiped a tear from Olivia’s cheek with his thumb. With a small nod, she turned her back to him. “Liv, I really wanna talk.”

“Stop calling me Liv, please.” The mattress shifted when Charlie sat beside her, not wanting to leave yet.

“I’ve never called you Olivia.”

“Charlie.” Her voice sounded raspy and incredibly tired and he couldn’t help but feel guilty for making her feel like that. “I really need you to leave me alone and let me get my shit together. Please.”

“Right,” Charlie stood up quickly and looked around not really knowing what else to say, “I’m sorry, Olivia. I never meant to make you feel like I cornered you or something.”

She didn’t respond, and when she heard the front door closing, she covered her head with a pillow and let out a scream. She hated to feel so powerless, so confused and so hurt. It felt like he just decided to reopen a wound that took too long to close and now it was painfully bleeding again.

It was heartbreaking to see her sobbing on the floor and not being able to calm her, to tell her that he never meant to leave like that.

“Where were you?” his sister questioned when she saw him with guilt all over his face, “Charlie, I told you not to mess with Olivia. What did you do now?”

“I don’t know.” He did though. He knew what did just a few minutes ago and what he did four years ago.

“Is she alright?” the hazel-eyed boy nodded and then shrugged, rubbing his palms over his face, feeling the frustration take over his body.

“I needed to talk to her, but she shot me down the moment she saw me, and then I think she was about to have a panic attack or something. She was better when I left.”

Charlie didn’t remember seeing her like that when they still were friends, Olivia was so determined and optimistic, not as impulsive as he was but always open for a new adventure or a trip with him and his siblings. But then, he started to have feelings for his best friend and decided that it wasn’t worth it to ruin their friendship and buried those feelings by getting a girlfriend just to act as if he wasn’t in love with Olivia. He knew it was mutual but what was the point of dating if he was going to move to Toronto and she was going to stay in New Brunswick.

Leaving her after his birthday four years ago was one of the things he regretted the most. He knew damn well she was afraid of the dark and yet he broke his promise. Charlie tried to put some distance between them so it wouldn’t hurt as much once he moved out, but he ended up messing everything.

“She didn’t even let me call her Liv, Meg.” His sister sat next to him and hugged him.

“We stopped calling her like that after you left,” she explained feeling sorry for him, “I guess it reminded her of you too much since you were the one that gave her the nickname.”

At lunchtime, Charlie made his way to his ex-best friend’s house with a portion of his birthday cake and the Tuna Pasta Salad his mom cooked for lunch. It wasn’t like he was planning to have lunch with her, but if getting her lunch and dessert gave him another shot, he’d even consider getting her breakfast the next morning.

He opened the backdoor just like he just did when they were younger and went straight into the kitchen, hoping she wouldn’t catch him sneaking into her house.

“Fuck it,” he whispered when he didn’t hear noise upstairs. With the food now in a tray, Charlie went upstairs.

Liv was in the same place she was before he left earlier. The Scottie lifted her head when he entered the room but didn’t bark at him and curled up again next to her sleeping owner. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he put the tray down and let out his breath.

“Hey,” his voice broke the silence they were in and Olivia moved in her sleep but didn’t wake up, “I got you food, Liv,” He said again this time a little bit louder.

“What?” she questioned; her mind fuzzy with sleep to understand what was happening.

“My mom made lunch and if I’m not wrong, it was your favorite.” The answer was simple, but why would he even bother to get her lunch if she told him to leave her alone.

“What time is it?” she asked again sitting up in bed rubbing her left eye with her hand.

“Time for you to eat,” the boy pointed to the tray next to her and stood up, “I brought you cake, I thought you’d like it.”

“Thanks?” Charlie let out a soft laugh and left. “Charlie!” She called out and he came back with a hopeful look in his eyes. “I made it,” Olivia pointed at the cake and his cheek started to turn pink in embarrassment.

“You made my birthday cake.”

Olivia shrugged as if it was nothing. “Meg asked me to,” she grabbed the fork and continued, “you know it’s my job, right?”

“What do you mean?” Charlie sat again in the bed taking every chance to keep the conversation going.

“I have a bakery.” She had a fucking bakery, and he didn’t even know. How would he? He never made questions about her, but he thought his family would tell him such a big thing. “Thanks for the food.” And that was his sign for him to leave.

“Thanks for the birthday cake.”

Olivia had her own bakery and made him a birthday cake, it was her job but still, she knew it was for him and made it anyway. That had to mean something, right?

Charlie was right, it was her favorite meal. She could have graduated from one of the most prestigious cooking schools in Canada but not even her fancy cooking school could beat Jeannette’s salad. She remembered Jeannette telling her that the magic was in her secret ingredient when she was younger and after all this time, she still wasn’t able to figure out what it was.

Her phone vibrated with a new notification and she smiled when she saw a picture of her parents with cocktails in their hands. She hated the fact that she’d have to leave a couple of days before they came back, but she needed to go and pack the few things she still had left in her old apartment back in Vancouver and move all her stuff across the country and into her new apartment.

The doorbell woke up the puppy from her nap and ran towards the door, letting Olivia know someone was outside.

“You would never think those barks belong to such a tiny animal,” Meghan chuckled when she opened the door and Peanut started to jump around her.

“Oh, I know, I get startled sometimes and she’s only eight months old,” she let the girl in not before giving the house across the street a nervous look.

“Char and my brothers went out,” Olivia nodded and thanked her quietly for the information, “I was bored so I thought you’d want to hang out.”

“Oh, sure,” she smiled at Charlie’s sister and felt guilty for all those times she said no whenever Meghan invited her over to hang out like they used to do, “I wanted to go to the farm and pick some fresh berries. I don’t know if you wanna go with me.”

“I don’t know,” Meghan scrunched her nose, and the gesture reminded the older girl of Charlie. If she didn’t grow up with them, she could’ve thought they were twins, “I’ll go only if you make me muffins.”

“That’s unfair,” Olivia said playfully, “I’m gonna change and we can head out.”

“I’m gonna stay right here so I can play with this cute baby,” Meghan cooed the dog and sat on the floor to play with her.

Running back into her room, she changed into some overalls and a top. She wanted to be comfortable on the farm and be able to move around without worrying about her skirt getting caught in the branches.

“I swear you and my brother are the only people I know that love wearing overalls,” Olivia’s cheeks blushed at her words, remembering very well how often Charlie used to come over wearing overalls and no shirt underneath.

“They’re comfy,” she said looking at her outfit with slight embarrassment.

“You look great, Liv.” Her eyes darted back at Meghan and decided not to make a big deal about the nickname.

“Your car or mine?” she questioned, picking up the keys and her bag.

“Yours, I don’t feel like driving.”

When Charlie landed his first role, he would spend a lot of time out of town filming, and eventually, both girls became closer. She could never compare her friendship with Meghan with the one she once had with Charlie because they were inseparable, they spent so much time together she was sure she had her first period when they were playing over at his house and both freaked out because they didn’t know what to do. Later that day he came over to her house with a chocolate bar and a single flower.

“My mom said you’d probably want some chocolate, so I got you your favourite.” She remembered the eleven years old Charlie said with his cheeks burning red.

She sighed at the memory, realizing how even such an important milestone in her life somehow involved the boy that was messing with her head lately.

“So…,” Meghan started once they both were on the road, “Charlie almost threw a tantrum because none told him you had a bakery.”

Olivia chuckled just imagining Charlie pouting with his arms crossed over his chest, “he never asked you guys.”

“It’s not that he didn’t ask about you,” She bit the inside of her cheek getting a little bit uncomfortable with the conversation, “I guess we all decided not to tell him about your life like he didn’t really deserve updates about you.”

“I get it,” stopping the car at a red light, she smiled at the girl sitting next to her, “I’m glad you didn’t have to deal with questions about me because if he wanted to know something, he should’ve asked me himself.”

Not like she’d have answered his calls or texts because she didn’t know if she would have. She thought she might have answered if he had reached out for her, but he never did.

Hanging out with Meghan was like breathing fresh air, both girls laughing and messing around while they picked fresh blueberries, their fingers getting tinted with the fruit’s juice. Snapping the last picture with their blueberries, they went back home.

“Can I post this one?” Meghan asked, showing her the picture where a smiling Olivia was holding a single blueberry in front of the camera while Meghan stuck her tongue out.

“Sure, I like it. Send me the others so I can post one too,” she commented, looking at the picture quickly before turning her attention back to the road ahead.

Once they got back home, Meghan took place in one of the stools in the kitchen, while Olivia got everything she needed to bake. She was about to start the mixer when her friend got a text and cursed under her breath.

“Everything alright?” she wondered with a raised eyebrow, confused at her friend’s reaction.

“I have to teach a dance class and I completely forgot about it,” with an apology written all over her face, she stood up and gathered her stuff, “I’m sorry, Liv, but I need to go or I’m gonna have a bunch of angry moms complaining about my absence.”

“Yeah, sure. Go don’t worry,” Olivia assured her with a chuckle, “I’ll take these babies to your house once they’re ready.”

“You’re the best. Thank you!” Meghan stated before running back to her own house.

Deciding it was better to put on some music while she baked, she went to connect her phone to the Bluetooth speaker when the back door opened, and Charlie waved at her with a shy expression on his face.

“Meg said you could use some help with the muffins.”

“Uhm…” Olivia frowned her brows slightly, knowing this was Charlie trying to apologize and make things better, “just put on some music,” she handed him the speaker and started the mixer.

She wasn’t sure how she felt with him sitting on the stool his sister was on just a few minutes ago, but the burning anger she felt the first day she saw him was missing. But they were far from being friends again, she told herself.

“How was your hike?” The words left her mouth quietly as an attempt to make small conversation and feel a little less observed by him.

“It was great, we got a bunch of nice pictures,” and there it was, she smiled to herself when she heard the excitement in Charlie’s voice, “we had to come back earlier because Pat’s bike got a flat tire, but it was fun.”

“So, you guys went cycling,” she stated the obvious just to make him talk about his little trip. God, she missed the way Charlie used to tell her about his day and how excited he was about little things, the same excitement he had now as he told her about the perfect spot that he found to take pictures and how he promised to a couple that he would send the cute picture he took of them as soon as he could.

Charlie used to remind her of a puppy, filled with excitement and energy and she let out a chuckle when she realised he was just like he was when they were teenagers.

“Did I miss my own joke?” he questioned, tilting his head with amusement.

Olivia shrugged, without bothering to look at him, too busy with her task, and said, “you’re just like a puppy, Charlie.”

“You used to tell me that a lot back then,” he pondered biting his lower lip, the energy in the room shifting at the mention of the friendship they used to have.

“I know.”

She didn’t know what else to say because she didn’t know how she felt about their interaction. Or the fact that Charlie was sitting there, just a few feet away from her just like they used to be when they were younger. Him watching and telling her stories while she busied herself with a new recipe.

“I’m glad one of us actually became a chef,” Charlie spoke again, breaking the silence. The girl didn’t respond, she poured the mix into the muffin cups not letting his words disrupt her. Once the tray was in the oven, she turned around and crossed her arms over her chest, feeling the nostalgia wash away and the resentment took its place.

“Some of us stick to what we said, Charles.” The bitterness in her voice made the boy close his eyes, knowing very well the course this conversation was about to take.

“How many times do I have to apologize, Olivia?” She scoffed and shook her head in disbelief.

“You haven't said sorry not even once, Charlie.” Sure he said sorry for getting into her backyard without permission and invading her space the past two days, but he never apologized for the shitty move he did four years ago.

“You don’t even let me talk!” He argued back.

“Oh, come on, Charlie!” Olivia rolled her eyes and pointed a finger at him, “don’t start with that bullshit because you had a whole week to apologize for leaving me on my own when you said you’d walk me home, but you chose to stay quiet and then leave the town without even saying goodbye.”

“Shit, Liv,” he whispered when he saw her eyes welling up with tears, “please don’t cry.”

“Do you even realize how bad I felt when you left without saying goodbye?” she questioned drying her cheeks with the back of her hand, “I saw you get in that car with all your belongings and I waited for you to come and say goodbye, to text me or call me but you just left and now you come here as if nothing happened.”

“Liv, I’m sorry,” he told her, standing up so he could get closer to the girl that was facing him with hurt in her eyes, fighting to hold back the tears from falling. “You need to believe when I tell you I’m fucking sorry for doing that.”

She jerked away from him when he tried to hold her. “Thanks for the apology,” Olivia inhaled deeply, the scent of Charlie’s cologne too intoxicating now that she was trying not to fall apart in front of him.

“If you want me to go, I’ll go,” he mumbled, understanding she probably needed some space.

“I’ll take the muffins to your place once they’re done.”

Charlie stood there, right in front of the girl that once was his partner in crime, but now they were practically strangers to each other and that was all his fault. He wished he could hold Olivia in his arms and tell her over and over again how deeply sorry he was for being such a coward, for leaving her without an explanation. He just wanted to take away all the pain he already caused her and somehow still manage to hurt her again. With a heavy sigh, the boy turned around and headed back to his house.

She sat in one of the stools, trying to calm her heart down and process whatever just happened. Charlie apologized but the annoying feeling that she needed more than just an apology didn’t leave her chest. An explanation would be good, maybe that way she would be able to actually forgive him and understand why he did it because right now, she didn’t really see them being friends again. Not when she was still holding a grudge against him.

Standing outside Charlie’s front door, with a tray full of freshly baked muffins in her hands, Olivia decided to go through the side door. She was met with nothing but silence while she made her way into the kitchen and saw a figure sitting with a guitar near the river through the window. Unlike her house, Charlie’s backyard was next to the river and the woods, where she remembered playing hide and seek with Charlie and Meghan when they were little.

She left the tray on the kitchen counter and headed to where Charlie was sitting. It was weird walking around his house, after all, she avoided the Gillespie family as much as she could when Charlie left and kept their interaction to a minimum, and hadn’t been inside in a long time.

“Hey,” she said softly, taking place next to him, “I brought the muffins.”

“Thanks, Liv,” he gave her a small smile before he continued playing a soft melody on his guitar.

“I still don’t understand why you did it,” Olivia managed to say after a few minutes of sitting together in complete silence.

“I didn’t want to, it just happened and then I fucked up things even more by not saying goodbye,” he explained and looked at her, “I thought I could just sneak out with Quinn because your house wasn’t far, I mean we were right here that day, and I wasn’t really thinking.”

“But that doesn’t explain why you didn’t talk to me that week before you left.”

He placed the guitar by his side, turning around to give Olivia his full attention, she looked at him with a mix of sadness and shyness in her brown eyes.

“When I left with Quinn we were going to her place and hook up, I’m sure you know that, but we didn’t ‘cause I called her Liv right before we did anything,” her cheeks blushed at his confession but unable to believe his words entirely, “that’s why we broke up soon after my birthday, and I was so fucking embarrassed about my feelings…”

“You were embarrassed because you liked me, way to go, Charlie,” she interrupted him slightly offended.

“I didn’t say that, let me finish,” He demanded getting frustrated with the conversation, “I was embarrassed because I called her your name because I was thinking of you in a moment I shouldn’t have,” he paused unsure of how Olivia was going to react at his next word, “that’s when I realised my feelings for you were a lot stronger than I thought and I got scared because I knew I was leaving.”

“Charlie,” she told him, confusion laced in her voice “did you even like Quinn?”

“No, not really. I kinda forced myself to be with her ‘cause I didn’t want to ruin our friendship” Charlie answered and then let out a sad laugh, “I guess it didn’t work out as good as I thought.”

“You know I liked you, right?” her voice was barely a whisper and her stomach fluttered when she saw him smile at her and nodded in response, “was I that obvious really?” When Charlie nodded again she covered her face with her hands in pure embarrassment.

“I’m really sorry, Liv,” he apologized again, and she rested her head on his shoulder, “if I could take all that back I’d do it in a heartbeat.”

“I guess I understand now,” Charlie could hear the soft smile even if he wasn’t seeing her face, “don’t get me wrong, it hurt like shit to see how you moved on as if I didn’t exist, but I get that you were scared and we both ended up messing up our friendship.”

“Do you think we’ll ever be able to be friends again?” Olivia turned around, meeting his gaze and sighed.

“Maybe?” she answered, scrunching her nose unsure of it.

They stayed like that for a while, Charlie’s gaze moving from her eyes to her lips from time to time, debating if he should just go for it or not. It was her that took the initiative and leaned in, pressing their lips together in a kiss that, just like the apology, was long overdue.

“I’ll take that as a no,” he murmured against her lips before kissing her again, leaving the shyness behind and cupping her face between his hands pulling her closer as if that way they could make up all the time they spent apart.

They both pulled away when they heard his older brother hollering at them from the balcony and Olivia laughed when Charlie flipped him the middle finger. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her forehead.

Of course, they still needed to talk a lot and find a way to work things out now that their feelings were out on display. But she had a good feeling about giving them a new shot, because, after all those years, they still managed to find their way back to each other.

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jelenamasterpost · 3 years ago

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2010

January 1st:

Selena and Justin share a Twitter exchange after sharing the stage together during Justin's performance of One Less Lonely Girl at Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve in Las Vegas

selena's tweet (x) justin's tweet (x)

January 5th:

Justin is interviewed by Popstar! Magazine and is asked whether he’s dating either Demi or Selena

Interviewer: "So there's been links that you've been seeing Demi or Selena, you guys have been Twittering back and forth. Is there any truth to that? Or are you guys just friends, is there something more there?"

Justin: "No, I just - I met Demi a few times. Me and Selena are good friends."

Interviewer: "Yeah, I think you're performing with Selena at Pop-Con this year, in February - you are, surprise! Do you know if you'll be hanging out with her at all while you're there?

Justin: "Probably, we're good friends."

full video (x)

January 31st:

Justin tweets "good times" to Selena, suggesting they recently hung out.

justin's tweet (x)

February 1st:

Selena and Nick Jonas arrive to “We Are The World” remake together in the same vehicle, held at Jim Henson Studios in Los Angeles. There's been speculation of a reconciliation as Selena was seen at Nick's concert in Dallas January 2nd and photographed crying during the song "Stay" (x)(x)

February 7th:

Nick attends San Antonio Rodeo to watch Selena perform. Selena allegedly introduces her song “I Won’t Apologize" (song about Nick) by sharing with the crowd: “I wrote this, but it’s in the past now”

February 14th:

Selena recently chatted with the California Chronicle and said this about her rumored rekindled romance with Nick Jonas (x)

"He's a really nice guy and he's always been a really good friend in my life. So I'm just happy to have him back as a good friend."

February 16th:

Selena talks about Justin during her radio interview with DJ Kid Kraddick and explains how their NYE performance was conceived:

“You know what, he’s the cutest, sweetest kid on the face of this planet. I feel like a cougar because I totally have a crush on him. He’s cute, he is so cute - he has swagger!"

"We were doing the Dick Clarks Rockin' New Years Eve and I performed first and I was leaving to do press backstage and Justin runs back and goes: 'Selena! Can you come on stage with me for One Less Lonely Girl?' and I was like, 'Ahh Justin' and he's like 'Please please please!' and I go 'Fine, okay what do I do?' and he's like 'Oh I'll do all the work' [...]"

"So then he runs off stage and then he runs back and he goes 'Wait, can you take your heels off I don't want you to be taller than me' I was like, 'No I'm not going to take my heels off' - and no we're actually the same height without heels."

youtube

February 16th:

During an interview with 106.1 KISS FM, a fan tells Selena that people in their school are saying she's dating Justin Bieber

Fan: “People in my school are saying that you and Justin Bieber are dating”

Selena: “I love that! I kind of wish we were [...] No, he’s 15, so I’d be a cougar, so that wouldn’t be right - but he’s very sweet, and I do love him very much. He’s a very good guy.”

The interviewer explains Justin was also recently on the show and that he does have a little crush on her -

Selena: “That’s okay! He can call me in like 3 years.”

youtube

February 19th:

Selena talks to MTV News before both her and Justin are set to perform at Pop-Con in NYC. When asked if they’d perform together she says:

"I'm excited. We would love to. We're trying to work it out, We don't know yet. We're still trying to figure out if we're going to do something together on stage. [It] might be a surprise, but as far as co-headlining — I don't know. I'm sure he's much bigger. [It's] probably his show — I'm just there." // she confesses that at this point they are such good friends, he almost feels like family: "I love Justin. When he first started to come over from Canada his manager contacted me and he just said that he would like to meet me and he was just such a good kid," she explained. "And I feel like a big sister now, 'cause I want to protect him. So I'm always very cautious with him, but he is so talented and he's so sweet, so that just started us wanting to work together. Now he's just become one of my good friends."

full article (x)

February 20th:

Justin and Selena pose for a photo together while attending Pop-Con, held at Nassau Coliseum in New York - they each are set to perform. After the event, Justin tweets to Selena calling her a sweetheart.

justin's tweet (x)

February 23rd:

Selena is again asked about Justin during her livestream webcast:

“I think Justin Bieber is amazing. Do you think he’s amazing? He’s like, 15, and he has like, every girl in America”

youtube

February 24th:

Selena interviews with Frankie of Neighborhood 93.3 and there's lots of Justin discussion. Frankie tells Selena that Justin was also recently interviewed and he called her a cutie-pie and said that she’s amazing. A fan also asks what she would name her baby (?) if she were to have one:

Selena: “Awww! He’s so cute! Oh my gosh, he’s about to turn 16, I’m just saying...just saying!”

Selena: “Lets see, I’ve had these names picked out for a while - I like Emory? Just E-M-O-R-Y. Emory, insert my husband’s last name…yeah, Emory Bieber"

youtube

March 1st:

Selena attends Justin's "Sweet 16" celebration and publicly tweets him a happy birthday at the end of the night. She's later seen in photos from the event kissing Justin on the cheek

selena's tweet (x) photos of selena at the event (x)

March 6th:

This is the last time that Selena and Nick Jonas are seen together this year.

March 12th:

During a radio interview with Billy Bush, Justin is asked “who the cutest Disney Channel girl is”

Justin: "Cutest Disney Channel girl? I think probably Selena Gomez."

full video here (x)

March 27th:

Selena and Justin both attend The Kids Choice Awards and pose together for a photo while on the red carpet.

Justin attends the event with (his rumored girlfriend) Jasmine Villegas, his "Baby" music video costar.

justin and jasmine (x)

March 30th:

Justin and Selena hangout together with Selena's family and have a jam session - they each share a tweet about it that evening

justin's tweet (x) selena's tweet (x)

April 10th:

Selena and Nick Jonas have officially broken up People confirms, and says they actually broke up in early March.

Though the couple never publicly confirmed they rekindled their relationship, the source says, “They were an item, but they are no longer together.” According to the source, the Disney Channel stars, both 17, broke up in early March, largely because work was going to keep them apart: Gomez is scheduled to film a movie in Europe this summer, while Jonas is expected to tour with his siblings at the same time.

full article here (x)

April 12th:

Selena does a radio interview on Key 103 while in Manchester and says that Justin is a great friend, and that he’s very protective of her:

Interviewer: When did you last see your mate Justin Bieber? Is he okay?

Selena: Yes he is, he's so funny, I actually don't have my phone out here and he freaked out cause he didn't understand, he's like "oh my god, I can't talk to you, I don't know what you're doing!" I'm like "I'm fine, I'm fine!" He's very protective, is what I've found - it's very funny, he's younger than me but he's been a better friend to me than most of the people my age.

Interview: Cause you guys have gone through similar things I suppose, despite the age difference?

Selena: Yeah but, people who've gone through the same things as me haven't been as supportive as he has been to me - it's been great.

full interview here (x)

May 23rd:

Selena tweets that she's listening to Justin's song Somebody to Love while in the studio

selena's tweet (x)

#jelena #selena gomez #justin bieber #jelena timeline #jelena masterpost #jasmine villegas #nick jonas #nelena #demi lovato

23 notes · View notes

punkscowardschampions · 3 years ago

Text

Dash & Lux

Dash: ☀️🧙🏽‍♀️🎶🥁🎸🪕🧚🏿‍♂️🌿🌼🧚🔮💃💫🔥🕺🏻🌳💗🍯🍻

Lux: That is almost exactly what the inside of my head looks like right now!!!

Lux: Is mind-reading a power that is bestowed upon you believers this eve?! 🤔😲

Dash: Right on

Dash: it’s one of many, trust

Lux: I’m ever sadder I can only be an observer now

Lux: Telepathy would be the most useful!

Dash: you gotta open your 👀 at least twice

Lux: I can 👀 at it, all of it in its splendour, just not participate

Dash: Bummer! What’s got you backing off? You don’t look like no wallflower chick to me

Lux: I got the dress code 🌻🌻🌻

Lux: Sunflowers are so strong-looking for flowers, don’t you think?

Lux: Not dainty and delicate

Lux: Well, I’m a Christian and technically this is a Pagan ritual so it’s a big 🚫🚫

Lux: I am finding it super interesting though

Dash: they don’t look strong, they are, babe 🌻🌻🌻 cleaned up Chernobyl, it’s far out what they can do

Dash: its roots, yeah, but we’re not all pagans here & we all still find something to celebrate, you could do St John the Baptist’s birthday as a christian, bonfires were big for that too

Lux: Whaaaaaaaaaat????! TELL ME MORE

Dash: about 🌻🌻🌻 or 🎂🔥🎇🎆?

Lux: 🌻🌻🌻 birthdays are contentious too

Dash: Helianthus annuus, from the Greek helios, meaning ☀️ they can remove poisonous chemicals & metals from the ground, water or air

Dash: they spread rapidly & can stabilize if not totally clear a field in 3 years, it’s 🤯

Lux: I wish I’d gone to school

Lux: Do you know any more fascinating things?

Lux: That sounds like magic

Dash: the world’s full of magic, but it wasn’t school that taught me to recognize it

Lux: Share the secret, kind sir

Dash: you’ve got the 🔑 & this here’s your kingdom, all you have to do is hang out & stay hip to what you 👀👂👃👅

Dash: 🧠➡️⬅️⬆️⬇️↗️↘️↙️↖️↪️↩️⤴️⤵️

Lux: I’ve 👅 so many wondrous tastes today

Lux: I feel full in so many senses of the word

Lux: How long have you been a member of the kingdom, stranger?

Dash: quest accepted to lay that feeling on you in every sense, then it’ll be a rad celebration

Dash: I’ve been here since I could walk, everywhere else is too big a drag to keep me

Lux: Oh, that’s so kind!

Lux: Everyone is so open and willing to teach me things

Lux: For instance, quick, when’s your birthday, wolf boy

Dash: it’s that kinda space 🦊

Dash: 20th of January 🎂 got me on the cusp ♑♒

Lux: Twins!

Lux: My birthday, which I’ve never celebrated before, is the 20th of March 😱

Lux: Someone, I’m not sure who, was just telling me about the Celtic tree signs

Lux: ‘If you were born in the month of the birch, you probably have a fresh and unusual outlook on life. People born under this Celtic tree astrology sign tend to be highly driven and are always full of zeal and ambition. They always want more and try to reach new horizons and expand their knowledge. Some of the characteristics attributed to the Birch sign are tolerance, toughness, and leadership. The Birch signs can brighten a room with their smile and quickly charm other people’

Lux: Yay or nay 🐺

Dash: you charmed so far or nah? [obviously smiling at her wherever she is as well like heyyy]

Lux: [definition of this emoji 🤭]

Dash: What’s your celtic tree sign?

Lux: ‘Those born under the Alder sign are natural pathfinders. They have the ability to move people and quickly gain followers to their cause. The Alders have a way with words, mingle easily and people love to be around them. They possess a mystic charisma, confidence and strong self-faith. Other character traits are: a good focus on goals and ideas, can’t tolerate fluff and waste.’

Lux: I am unsure but flattered 😊😊😊

Dash: I dig it

Dash: they let you know if we’re compatible? Your ♓♈ cusp makes you mad desirable to all signs

Lux: You need to see who here was born 15th April to 12th May or 2nd September to 29th September

Lux: But it says I’m compatible with you, so how does that work?! 😣

Lux: There’s so much I have to get my head ‘round

Dash: You’re gonna be 🥰💖 for me while I’m 🔍 for a 🐈 or 🐤 born on those dates?

Lux: Hey, that’s way less nice!

Lux: but I can also be looking for people born 13th May to 9th June AND 10th June to 7th July so 😋

Dash: those signs are full of it, trying to make me look uncool but don’t sweat it, I’d never cut you that low, like

Lux: If it’s not in the 💫s I can still say I’m pleased to meet you today as friends, Mowgli

Dash: Look up

Dash: if you don’t see a 🌠 I can show you a 🐺🌟 & 🦊🌟 chasing each other across the sky

Lux: [obviously literally does]

Lux: That’s very Disney 🏰✨

Dash: is that allowed?

Lux: I watched some at a friend’s house one time

Dash: & how was it?

Lux: 😭 but romantic

Dash: Anyone told you the oak king story yet?

Lux: Okay, thank Goodness

Lux: this lady with the dreads and the big back tattoo tried to tell me but I couldn’t understand her 🙊

Lux: Redeem your gentlemanly reputation and save both of us the embarrassment

Lux: Her accent was wild! 🤯

Dash: did her version start with Fadó, fadó?

Dash: wouldn’t be a wild guess

Lux: I won’t credit you with any telepathic skills this time, then

Lux: also I’d need to 👂 it again to confirm fully but yes, I think so

Dash: [send her an utterly unnecessary voice memo]

Lux: It sounds more intriguing when you say it

Dash: [obviously gotta tell her the full story in an irish voice memo purely for the #flex and the flirt cos you know damn well you’re gonna have to translate it, boy]

Lux: 🤩

Lux: Did you learn that here too?

Lux: I’ve lived so many different places and yet I only know the one language

Dash: My ma started it but when the establishment took over it was a bad scene & turned me off for time, last few years here it felt groovy again having that connection & I refound the 💚☘️

Lux: It’s really cool

Lux: it sounds old, or like elvish or something else not real

Dash: it’s a trip, you’ve gotta get someone to teach you while your fly by lasts

Lux: Oh, I live here 😊

Lux: I room with Nora, do you know her?

Dash: Beats me, what’s her deal?

Lux: Her and her brother Finley have been here for a while, but not forever like you

Lux: but there are a lot of people here so I’m not surprised you’re not sure 😅

Dash: not a clue but loads of people are too rattled to wanna get involved, could be her vibe

Dash: or she just ain’t outta sight like you

Lux: She’s totally involved, she secured like all of the sunflowers for today

Lux: well, me and Amber helped but she was definitely the most enthusiastic

Dash: 🌻👑! I do know her, but her in with Amber & instant karma means she’s not gonna mess around with me

Lux: Ooh, what did you do

Dash: jack, Amber’s hassling me cos I’m not trying to be her old man, she gets super rash & things get heavy with 0 slack

Lux: Hmm I shouldn’t have asked 🤐🙉

Dash: ask her why she’s making a move on my older bro now if not to try & lay a trip on me, babe’s lost it

Lux: Whaaaaaaa

Lux: You have a brother?!

Lux: Is he invisible?

Dash: I wish

Lux: Which one is he, point him out

Dash: [points in the direction of their house lol]

Lux: [a face of understanding like oh okay]

Lux: How does Amber know him then?

Dash: from stalking me

Lux: I don’t think she would do that

Lux: She must’ve just bumped into him or something

Dash: at my house, yeah

Lux: It’s cool, it’s not really my business

Dash: open 👀 like I said

Lux: 📖

Dash: that too 🧠💗🤲

Lux: I can agree with that sentiment

Dash: we’re groovy then

Lux: Of course 😊

Lux: enjoy your evening

Dash: back at you, golden girl ☀️🎇👸🏼

Lux: I like your outfit too

Lux: it’s very ☀️🧙🏽‍♀️🎶🥁🎸🪕🧚🏿‍♂️🌿🌼🧚🔮💃💫🔥🕺🏻🌳💗🍯🍻

Dash: [comes over and ties a chain of flowers around her wrist like it’s a friendship bracelet energy]

Lux: [clearly delighted with this]

Dash: [ask her if she wants to dance even though you know damn well she’s only observing because kind of boy you are]

Lux: [so rude lowkey when she’s struggling so hard with what she does and doesn’t believe now, we’re in enough of a dilemma without your help but there we go; thus we will go dance with you because we do want to and we can make arguments that that isn’t joining in with the rituals of it all]

Dash: [he’s lucky Amber is busy because she would fight him, but instead enjoy your dance you two]

Lux: [the audacity of your lies about her, we were so awkward like 😬 anyway, we will have a nice dance though]

Dash: [such a dickhead he can only be humbled by fire, full offense Nora because we’re ignoring you hen cos you’re clearly wise to his bs]

Lux: [there’s clearly a growing group of gals who are unimpressed by your nonsense and that will be interesting to navigate]

Dash: [Definitely, but yeah probably do slip away like a snek before any of those gals do kick your ass]

Lux: 🎃👠🐁🌠🕛

Dash: A 📘 for the 🔥

Lux: 🤔?

Dash: it’s a drag, all that heavy shit with her fam is a bummer, she gets to split but only til 🕛 that’s some 🌠

Lux: Yeah, it’s enough to get help though and then she gets saved

Dash: nah, to get shafted, she don’t get to dance with anyone else there, it’s a scam

Lux: 😅 who else does she need, she’s got the prince, silly!

Dash: someone who recognizes her next day?

Lux: Touche 😏

Lux: Being a 🤴 is a lot of work

Dash: What 🤴 told you that?

Lux: Where to begin

Lux: I’ve known several who would say as much and the 👸s would never disagree

Dash: Fadó, fadó, fadó a bhí ann…

Dash: but I’d shut it down from the beginning, they gotta be shining you on

Lux: I’m going to have to have translate open constantly, I see 😰

Lux: but very noble

Dash: I try, like you & your ☘️ it’s chill we’ve all got your back

Lux: It would be way worse if it was the only language any of you spoke

Lux: thank goodness 😅

Lux: there’s lots more that’s more pertinent for me to get a grip on

Dash: 🧝🧝🏻‍♀️🧝🏽🧝🏾‍♀️

Dash: we’ve got you on the rest too, like, goes without saying

Lux: Most everyone has been super welcoming

Dash: how long have you lived here?

Lux: Not long enough that that’s insulting 😋

Lux: but gosh, a couple of weeks? Must be

Dash: nah I meant cos I don't wanna explain to you what sorta place this is like you're fresh through the door if you've had loads of time to find your own way

Lux: Oh no, I’m a total n00b

Lux: Hazel got me here but I’ve kinda just been left to it since

Lux: Anything you wanna tell me would be appreciated

Dash: did Amber or Nora give you the tour?

Lux: Amber’s been super busy and Nora likes to stay in our room mostly

Dash: not super welcoming

Dash: but it’s no sweat, I’ll show you round, we’ll have a blast

Lux: they’ve both got their own stuff going on, I don’t expect them to drop it for me

Lux: but that would still be cool, thank you!

Dash: say when

Dash: it’ll be as electric under the ☀️ as the 🌕🌖🌗🌘🌑🌒🌓🌔🌙

Lux: I can 👀 in the dark

Lux: You choose

Lux: find me when you’ve stopped having the MOST fun?

Dash: 🐺🐾🦊

Dash: Meet me in the orchard at midnight, ditching your shoes before

Dash: there’s an 🍏🌳🍎 you can 👀 the whole farm from the top of

Lux: And you’ll remember what I look like?

Dash: you look unreal

Dash: unforgettable

Lux: I got creative with the arts and crafts 🌟⚡️☀️

Lux: I’ve always made my own clothes

Lux: well, I made them for my sisters before

Lux: looking unforgettable was not the end goal there though

Lux: that was for secret

Dash: my nan would be hip to you, she used to make her own clothes, for her girl & her sister too when they wanted, it’s still a vibe for her

Lux: I will make her something then

Lux: what’s her style?

Dash: indescribable

Dash: I’ll show you pics

Lux: Awkward if your nan is cuter than you

Dash: at our age she totally was

Lux: Awh, you’re so sweet

Lux: I have nothing nice to say about my meemaw

Dash: keep it for mine when you meet her

Lux: You’re gonna introduce me to your nan? 😊

Dash: right on, she’ll wanna put whatever you make on for you to 👀 & it’s only a few fields over

Lux: 🏞 it’s a crazy beautiful spot to live, that’s for sure

Lux: so you live with her?

Dash: Yeah, my ma grew up there & when my parents called it quits she wanted to move back

Lux: You’re close-knit

Lux: that’s special

Dash: closer than I am to my da

Lux: Does that upset you?

Dash: I don’t let it upset my equilibrium, he’s uptight, that’s his problem not mine

Lux: I understand

Lux: I don’t agree with my dad on a lot of things

Lux: it’s still sad though

Dash: I got killer people round me, a 2nd family here accepting me for who I am, it ain’t cool he don’t, but they give me what I need

Lux: I’m happy for you

Lux: Seriously

Lux: again, that’s special, you should be really grateful

Dash: I am, believe me

Dash: you’re gonna scope out how special it is here now I’m in charge of showing you everything

Lux: I’d love to see your 🌍 how you see it

Lux: Kinda sounds like everything I need, honestly

Dash: you can, easily when we’re sharing a branch

Lux: 🧚‍♀️ you’re dainty, I trust you won’t let me fall

Dash: I’ll let you fall into something good though, new heights

Lux: Will it hurt?

Dash: no way

Lux: You aren’t pranking me, are you?

Dash: there’s no plastic on me, I’m being real with you

Lux: If you’re gonna try and jump me out in the orchard I’ll have to show you crazy and I really can’t afford to lose this place okay

Lux: so if I believe you right now and you were lying, it’ll be worse than it would’ve been, you feel me?

Dash: Hurting you isn’t my action, I’m about a gentler touch than that

Lux: and I’m not a bully, that’s not my vibe so that’s the warning out of the way

Dash: avenging 👼 I get it

Lux: My costume has you fooled, I think

Dash: Wait, so you’re pranking me?

Lux: No, I swear! 😅

Lux: I don’t feel like I’ve been anywhere near as nice to you as you have to me though

Dash: but you did dance with me & that was choice

Lux: I wanted to

Dash: me too, I wasn’t asking just to be nice

Lux: even though you’re very nice

Lux: I believe that

Dash: I think we’re getting somewhere

Lux: You understand why I’d find a boy like you being interested in me dubious at first, right

Dash: Nah, but I’m listening

Lux: Well it’s embarrassing to say

Dash: alright, listen, I think you’re the most

Dash: I’m embarrassed I’ve not met you before tonight

Lux: There are so many people to meet

Lux: and you’re like the 🤴 of this place, huh

Lux: you have to dance with all the ugly stepsisters too

Dash: if Amber said write that to bait me I’m shutting up

Lux: I think Amber left 🤔

Lux: And who’s calling her ugly, even if you guys have beef, like no way

Dash: & Nora’s gotta be back in your room cos that’s her bag, yeah?

Dash: so where are you?

Lux: I’m in the middle of [one hippie activity] and [another]

Dash: [go find her and dance with her again obvs, we can be bolder about if some of the haters are gone and it’s later so he’s clearly a bit more drunk/high by now too]

Lux: [the way you’re probably sober like how lmao, not saying you always are or will be ‘cos no but gotta have our wits about us ‘cos witchery is afoot; but yeah we all know it can shamelessly way more of a Thing™]

Dash: [at least Amber was too until her row with the bae even if she wasn’t the most present in other ways, so it wasn’t just you gal, but yeah, dispel any remaining fears she may have that you’re not into this please boy with this moment]

Lux: [we know you got your own going on, it’s good, this drama has to happen whether you like it or not babe sorryyyy, when you’re then even more into it because it’s like HELLO IS THIS ALLOWED, so new and fresh to get to remotely be this brazen]

Dash: [shouldn’t LOVE that for you but I do, we should probably let y’all go on your tour then because we’re both in a mood and there’s nobody to separate you]

Lux: [probably, but I will insist on making you wait ‘til midnight regardless]

Dash: [it is a fat mood and I did pick that time deliberately so yeah, dance the night away first hens]

Lux: [sure it’s probably near that time anyways]

Dash: [yeah absolutely]

Lux: [we can skip to the after in this if you like?]

Dash: [are we thinking am like did y’all fall asleep together or?]

Lux: [Hmm, do we go with the Cinderella and have her bounce or do we go against it and not, because then she would think he wasn’t a dick later]

Dash: [even though he’s a dick I still want all the cute I can grab with my smol hands]

Lux: [it’s not like you can’t be like I just fell asleep it’s nbd with it so yeah okay

Dash: [I also like the camber parallel of it all so]

Lux: [true true, we can do it, then you can just have breakfast as a group because duh, was it sunday or monday today?]

Dash: [I think it’s sunday aka Cosmo is having his 2nd date with Ruby tonight and then Camber breakfast dates start monday]

Lux: [okay then you will have to think of a creative way to ditch her then boy hohaha]

Dash: [at least he can just go home because Amber only stayed to angrily eat some fruit and Cosmo had a busy day ahead because I doubt the shower situation at this commune is thriving, water probably runs out always]

Lux: [what a poser lmaooo]

Dash: [and very rude not to invite her when she probably wants to shower or bathe too]

Lux: [we literally got gems stuck to our face but pop off]

Dash: [we know you’re not because your mother is there and sick of your behaviour but yes, it wouldn’t kill you to let her boy]

Lux: [no offence but run him over, anyway, some time later]

Lux: are you ⬇️🍄?

Dash: 🛹⚡️

Lux: aha, cool

Lux: good thing you didn’t invite me I’d end up 🤕 for sure

Dash: I didn’t stop you falling out of a tree last night to have you fall off a board later in the AM

Lux: Hey, you make it sound like I was 🤏 close! 😆

Dash: nah, your balance is sound

Lux: I don’t recall you stepping on my toes, either

Dash: don’t wanna have to start the day off doubting your 🍒 recall, that’d be a bad scene

Lux: I was totally sober thank you 😅

Dash: easy to claim the magic’s all you when I ain’t met you before but I’m a believer

Lux: Wait, was that a compliment or a diss?

Lux: Maybe I’m contact-wasted

Dash: contact with Nora would get you more sober, there’s a diss

Lux: Awh, don’t be mean!

Lux: She’s been really nice

Dash: chill out, I’m only playing

Lux: Hmm 😏

Lux: anyway, what are you doing later?

Dash: I said I’d hang with Yara

Lux: Oh cool, who’s that?

Dash: I’ll introduce you after

Lux: after what?

Dash: we’re done messing around

Lux: wow, alrighty then

Dash: you’ll like her, she’s a trip

Lux: I’m not totally sure she’d want you to 💬 that

Lux: or I’ll know what to 💬 now

Dash: it’s no biggie

Lux: idk, this is not the way I was raised

Lux: you say it’s not but idk, you know

Dash: you don’t have to meet her

Lux: Yeah

Dash: I think she’s rad but you gotta make up your own mind

Lux: It’s not about her

Dash: nah, you, I understand where you’re coming from, it’s a new world

Lux: Right, it seems really icky to me that you’d tell me any of this

Lux: it’s not about how rad she could be

Dash: Come on, Lux, I’m keeping this honest

Lux: I guess

Lux: Why do you need to tell me though, I don’t get it, for real?

Dash: I like you, I don’t want it to get twisted

Dash: 📖

Lux: Okay, I appreciate the sentiment then

Dash: I’ll come find you later, on my own

Lux: That’s okay

Lux: I’ve got lots of chores to catch up on

Dash: they’ll be done faster if I help you

Lux: I can’t stop you

Lux: the place is a mess after last night and the more people who pitch in the better

Dash: I don’t get why you’d wanna stop me

Lux: I don’t really wanna hang out now, not today anyway

Dash: I can’t believe you’re being like this

Lux: Being like what?

Dash: Amber

Lux: I’m not

Lux: you can’t hang out now, I can’t hang out later, how is it any different?

Dash: the way I’m travelling through today is a straight line, yours is all over the place

Lux: Good for you?

Lux: It doesn’t matter either way though

Dash: doing a u turn on me does matter

Lux: It does?

Lux: because last night you thought I was rad, so obviously this morning I wanted to hang out with you again, so I think it’s my turn to do the 180, if you think about it

Dash: I still think you are, last night was unreal & we can be again, I’m just asking you to take 5 cos I can’t split on Yara after making plans time ago

Lux: That’s fine, it’s not fine to be mad at me ‘cos I ask you to take 5 too

Lux: that makes it make no sense

Dash: I’m not mad at you, I’m trying to make sense of why you’re mad at me

Lux: I’m not mad at you, I’m upset

Lux: You only need to ask

Dash: idk I didn’t think this would go down how it is

Lux: Me either, I guess

Dash: you for real want space?

Lux: I don’t know

Lux: Can I get back to you on that?

Dash: yeah

Lux: I wanted to see you again

Lux: I thought you’d want to see me too

Dash: I do, you read me right last night, why are you gonna start disbelieving yourself today?

Lux: You want to see Yara more

Dash: I wanna see her too

Lux: Okay, have fun then

Dash: we cool?

Lux: I don’t know

Dash: idk what's turned you different, you were laying it on me like you got it, how I'm

like royalty & everyone wants a piece of my time

Lux: Oh my Gosh

Lux: I wasn’t being serious and I didn’t think you were

Lux: do you honestly think that, like what?

Dash: It's a touch plastic saying I'm like 👑 but still close to how it is

Lux: Um, you don’t even live here

Lux: you have a whole house and family

Dash: I'm here with my chosen family as much as I can be

Lux: Yeah, but what do you

actually do for this place, or anyone here?

Lux: The audacity to act like it’s your kingdom, that’s laughable and gross all at once

Dash: back off babe, I do whatever they need me to do

Lux: Babe-ing me right now isn’t a good look

Lux: manual labour at best makes you help, not visiting royalty

Lux: are you crazy, like, who do you think you are, seriously I’m so curious

Dash: Who are you? Thinking you can lay this trip on me about what I can & can't do

Lux: I’m not telling you you can or can’t do anything

Lux: I asked you not to call me babe, which is basic politeness

Dash: nah, you're telling me I don't belong to this place

Dash: questioning how I do like

it's up to you

Lux: I said you don’t live here, and you don’t

Lux: and I’ve never seen you contribute, maybe you were super busy before I got here, then I’ll apologize for that

Dash: you're doing a census, yeah? Hold up [everyone currently who doesn't live her like the petty prince he is]

Dash: I've got family here, they all keep me busy

Lux: Cool? Thanks for telling me who else is a tourist ???

Lux: You’re just being defensive, there’s no need if you’re secure in that and your place here

Dash: quit trying to rattle me

Lux: I’m truly not

Lux: but no, we’re not cool now

Dash: I made it known from the top where I live

Lux: Where you live isn’t the issue

Dash: what's your issue? I'm loved & welcomed here, that's all I said

Lux: That’s nice

Lux: I don’t really want to discuss my issue with you, with you, right now, if that’s okay

Dash: later then

Lux: See you around, Dash

Dash: I can't believe you think I'm a flake, this has me totally unglued, you know

Lux: I don’t feel great about it either

Dash: how can I make you feel less bummed out?

Dash: your tour was the most far out I've ever given

Lux: I don’t think you can, it’s done now

Lux: I just need some time to change what I thought this was, or was gonna be, in my head

Lux: but thanks, for offering

Dash: take your time to 👀 what we can be & how you wanna evolve

Lux: Maybe we can be friends later on

Dash: I’d dig it

Lux: I liked talking to you last night

Dash: I felt more connected to you than I usually do

Lux: I don’t think you’re an awful person, FYI

Lux: I just think you could’ve been clearer, and accept that you hurt me without getting way defensive, you know?

Lux: I can accept you didn’t mean to

Dash: I thought I was being clear

Lux: Yeah, I know

Lux: I’m from a very different background and place, it just didn’t translate well, clearly

Dash: yeah

Lux: but I thought I’d put that across well enough that you got that too

Dash: I do get you, but I can’t 180 myself to fit

Lux: No, I’m not asking you to fit my understanding, it’s fine you don’t

Dash: What are you asking?

Lux: Nothing, honestly, I’m trying to explain why I’m upset

Lux: Just like you can’t 180, I can’t change how I see and feel about it immediately, even if some of the ways I were raised are outdated or potentially bad, you know

Lux: You don’t need to do anything

Lux: From my perspective, it felt like a 180 and hurtful to tell me about hooking up with someone else the morning after

Lux: I know how you think and operate is totally different, but that’s it

Dash: but I wanna do something, to help you

Lux: You are nice…

Lux: I don’t know though, what would help?

Dash: I meant what I said last night about showing you this place, making it feel more like a home, how it is for me

Lux: Maybe you could come back and help with the chores

Lux: I shouldn’t have said you NEVER help out, I’ve not been here long enough to make that observation

Dash: maybe it looks like I don’t, cos with family you take liberties sometimes, that kid who’s naughty at home & don’t say shit at school, comfortable to play up

Lux: I have 8 brothers, I understand 😅

Dash: you can have that too, should

Lux: I did, as much as any of us did

Lux: I was a boy, remember

Dash: with 0 limits though, people trying to control & change what you do is for outside of here, I don’t have to think in my dad’s 🟥🟧🟨🟩🟦🟪⬛️⬜️🟫 way or do what my ma reckons is righteous

Lux: Sounds idyllic, Dash

Dash: it is

Lux: You have to understand my experience of people doing exactly what they want means someone is being exploited or abused for that person’s privilege

Lux: my parents had their utopia at the price of the things we wanted, needed

Dash: that’s why you need this new experience

Lux: Okay

Lux: I do want new experiences

Dash: the farm has the magic to grant you whatever you’re here for, no wish is the wrong size

Lux: You really seem to believe it so I will try too 😊

Dash: I’m about to 🛹⚡️ back if you wanna clean the opposite end or hide from me in the 🍏🌳🍎

Lux: That’s cool

Lux: but thanks for the warning 💗

Dash: don’t let how out of this world you look distract me then

Lux: I so don’t so that won’t be an issue 😌

Dash: It's an accident, huh? I feel you, it must be my fault I can’t look away

Lux: You’re way too smooth for your own good

Lux: but I wouldn’t say that’s a fault, necessarily 🤭

Dash: Hey, I didn’t manifest you into being, even if last night did feel like it had to be cosmically devined somehow

Lux: I felt it too

Lux: no one has ever

Lux: not like that anyway

Dash: you’re like a song I can’t get out of my head, I don’t want it to turn sad

Dash: I’m sorry I got you unglued too

Lux: It’s a lot more complicated than just you

Lux: it’s a whole thing

Dash: You’re gonna find people to share how heavy it is

Lux: 🤞

Dash: they’ll carry you through & even if it’s Amber I won’t let it bug me

Lux: I’m sure that’s a misunderstanding

Lux: I could talk to her? Subtly, of course

Dash: yeah, her misunderstanding me, you’ve got your reasons, she’s not new to any of this

Dash: her problem is she thinks she’s the most & everyone else should think she’s choice no matter what

Lux: Do you think she likes your brother?

Dash: no way, unless she’s got a football obsession now too

Lux: 🧲 maybe

Dash: idk

Lux: Me either

Lux: it just seems a bit crazy otherwise

Dash: he’s as uptight as my da, she’s never gonna get nowhere trying to mess around with him, whatever she’s doing it for

Lux: She won’t have any problem finding someone new

Lux: you said he’s older, right?

Dash: not loads, but he’s gonna be done with school in a sec

Lux: I see

Lux: so you’re the 👶

Dash: til my dad’s new lady puts her demands in

Dash: how many sisters you got to go with your 8 bros?

Lux: you don’t like her at all, huh

Lux: and 5, so they had a tough job being outnumbered

Dash: you heard of a WAG? That’s her whole deal

Dash: whoa, so you had a full time secret sewing job

Lux: yes, we lived in England for a while, that’s how I ended up here

Lux: like a Kardashian, I can see you not having a lot to bond over

Lux: exactly 😂

Dash: you gotta teach me, my nan would be jazzed

Lux: I’d love to!

Lux: there’s a surplus of old clothes to practice on

Dash: still a chore, we get to skip cleaning, yeah?

Lux: Mending isn’t as fun as creating but you’ve got to start somewhere so, I think so 😊

Dash: 😁

Dash: we’ll have a blast cos I gotta start somewhere on earning your forgiveness too

Lux: You’re sweet, Dash

Dash: I’m being for real

Lux: I know you are

Lux: I don’t know what to say though because I’m awkward 😳

Dash: it’s a hands on kinda task & you already know what you’re doing with it, it’ll be me feeling 😳

Lux: No flirting, only crafting

Dash: 🧷📏🧵✂️🧶📍✨

Lux: That’s a very impressive emoji selection

Dash: missing 😍💞🥰💓😘💘 but it’s chill

Lux: Idiot 😏

Dash: 💟 is the compromise

Lux: Okay, that’s adorable

Lux: allowed 🤭

Dash: [show up and take her hand to lead her off to sew, we know you weren’t far away bitch]

Lux: [the way you just melt when he shows, oh gal]

Dash: [I’m upset about it]

Lux: [we know you really like him, for better and worse rn]

Dash: [thank god he does actually like you and it’s not a straight up Drew and Ro situation happening]

Lux: [we can only do that ‘cos they both lowkey suck so we aren’t sad lmao]

Dash: [I like this gal too much to be that evil]

Lux: [it’s drama enough without it being entirely one-sided like no lol]

Dash: [I hope some sewing does take place amidst the blatant flirting because learn a useful skill for once in your life dickhead]

Lux: [we aren’t gonna just roll over immediately ‘cos actually did upset us so you will have to]

Dash: [yay]

Lux: [so that’s probably the vibe for today ‘cos yeah we absolutely won’t even though it’s clear we still like you like that too, so you’ll just have to hang out platonically]

Dash: [it’s gotta be the vibe for a while, sucks to suck boy, but obviously hang out until that girl comes to find you because you clearly do also wanna hang out with her platonically it’s not just like that vine where he breaks the skateboard]

Lux: [a quality vine]

Dash: [do we wanna leave this here?]

Lux: [I think we can]

1 note · View note

mavmax · 4 years ago

Text

Birthday Adventures | Maverick & Sooyun

When: March 9th, 2021

Where: Soo’s Apartment; Santa Monica Pier

Warnings: none.

Featuring: @sooyunjeong

Mav had heard through the grapevine about Sooyun's birthday and hatched a plan to make her birthday something fun and memorable rather than just going in for sex. So, he texted her, letting her know that he was on his way and to get ready. He knew that there was a risk of them being seen in public, so he went to the store to pick up a mask that was identical to his, so they could roam around town undetected. Plus, he had a pretty cute birthday gift up his sleeve that he knew she'd enjoy.

Sooyun:

Sooyun dreaded her birthday, to her it felt like another day, but often her parents would send her flowers and what not to celebrate. What she wasn’t expecting was a text from Maverick suggesting they go out, with the fact he was well known and she was getting up there, she knew it was dangerous yet she found herself dressing not her usual fashion sense.

When Maverick arrived to her door, he had a bag in hand and a mask that was identical to his, but he couldn’t help but smile at her outfit. “Damn look at you, birthday girl,” he teased as he handed her mask. “This will keep you from being recognized, by the way. As for the present...you could open after.”

Sooyun:

Sooyun chuckled, rolling her eyes playfully, "yeah yeah...and thanks, looks like you would choose a mask to be matching with yours," she teased as she slipped it over her face and adjusted the baseball camp, "How did you even find out about my birthday anyways, not many people know it."

“Ahhh look at you grinning,” Maverick teased lightly. “Hey, it’s a good mask! It’s breathable and it’s comfortable around the ears. Plus you like black so of course I had to,” He winked. “I found out from a little birdie about your birthday and also know you don’t like celebrating. So, we’re just gonna go out and kick it instead.”

Sooyun:

“You’re a little too happy, tone it down a tiny bit, it’s just another day,” Sooyun waved off Maverick and lightly pushed him out the door as she shut it behind her and locking it shut. “Okay...where are we going and how much will I dislike it at first?” She asked jokingly as she followed after him.

"It's just another day but it's a great day to wild out, you know what I mean?" Mav laughed as he was pushed out the door. "Oh, you're definitely gonna hate where we're going then, but, since it's a weekday, it won't be so packed either. Y'know, the good ol' Pier. Carnival rides, corn dogs, the whole enchilada," He began to say in the most haughty voice before his character cracked with laughter

Sooyun:

she let out a groan at him and rolled her eyes, “such a cliche moment, but I’ll let it slide since you seem more excited about it.” Sooyun hasn’t been to the pier willingly in forever, mostly because it was always busy with tourist and people being loud.

"Cliché would've been taking you out to some fancy restaurant and putting sparklers in a chocolate lava cake," Maverick pointed out, with a knowing look before chuckling. "I promise, it's just a day to kick back, relax, be free for once, you know?"

Sooyun:

"Not the sparklers in chocolate lava," sooyun dramatically stated, she knew that Mav probably put a lot of thought into this just to make her feel comfortable over it. Sooyun smiled lightly and laughed, "fine...I'll take your word for it."

"Literally the fuckin' worst," Mav swooned just as dramatically for a moment before bursting into laughter. "Cool, now, let's get that disguise on and we can tear up the Pier. It'll be a good time, I promise," He reassured her with a smile. It was his way of saying thank you for being there, but also for existing. Sure, he probably wouldn't admit the other part out loud, but, he was really appreciative of Sooyun.

Sooyun:

"Fine fine..." Soo-yun slipped the mask over her face and made sure it was settled comfortable against her face and adjusting the cap on her head as well. Nodding her head as she sweep her side braid over her should and walked ahead. "Let's get this over with...eat tons of junk food and get sick from the rides."

Mav could feel the excited smile growing on his face as Soo adjusted the mask and her cap but the moment she started walking ahead was when he quickly snapped back to reality and followed her. "Sounds like a typical Tuesday night to me, am I right?" He teased as he caught up with her and purposely held his hand out to her. "Do you trust me?"

Sooyun:

Sooyun raised her eyes from his hands towards his face, tilting her head to the side and automatically reached out to place her hand into his, "Is that a serious question?" She asked in a joking manner before nodding her head, "At this point, in a weird way, yes I do."

With a big smile, that showed more in his eyes, Maverick said, "Yes, yes it is." Linking their hands together, he swung their hands down the hall as they made their way out and he looked around carefully. "I'm glad you do. Cause, I'm gonna have to ask you to run," He said, looking over at Soo with the most mischievous look.

Sooyun:

Sooyun eyes widen at his request, “you want to...run ?” She questioned and realized that he was asking her to do the one thing she disliked and that was cardio. “Why are we running for anyways?”

"Listen there are about 20 reasons why I'm asking you this, but," Mav looked around and then said, "If you don't want to I can just piggyback you. But...again, you gotta trust me on this and I'll tell you when we get there."

Sooyun:

“fine, let’s go. Should be glad I wore good running shoes.” Sooyun tighten her hand around his and nudged him forward to run which she followed right behind him. She wasn’t sure what he had planned but she knew that with him it was always something out of what she never expected.

“If you wore heels I would’ve just carried you,” Maverick chuckled before he took off running with Soo right beside him. As he sprinted towards the bus that was about to pull away until Mav flagged it down as he waved his hand and luckily, the bus guy was cool. “I knew the bus to The Pier was gonna run ahead of schedule, but I didn’t want to take away from the randomness of it,” he admitted and then motioned for Soo to hop on. “After you, miss.”

Sooyun:

Sooyun raised her eyebrows and laughed lightly as she hopped onto the bus, she couldn’t recall the last time she took the bus, usually she took a cab or Lyft to get to places which in a way always took a good chunk out of her wallet. “City bus Hmm? Very smart thinking,” she laughed and nodded her head at the driver as she walked further inside, looking for empty spots. “Ooh over here,” she started walking towards the area that was empty for the both of them in the back and sat by the window.

Mav knew the bus driver, and even under his disguise, the man still recognized the mischievous eyes as they both exchanged an acknowledging nod. He told Mr. Greg, as he called him, about the surprise date he wanted to take Soo on for her birthday and offered to take them rather than Mav call a fancy town car or any ride sharing service. “Yeah, I feel like a cab ride or something takes away the feel from it you know? Just bask in the city’s ambience,” He grinned. As he made his way in, he followed Soo to where she pointed and slid in next to her. “So, crazy question: what are you looking forward to this year?”

Sooyun:

she thought over his question, what exactly was she looking forward to this year, she wasn’t the type to plan anything due to it never working out or the fear of getting hurt. “I really can’t say I have anything I can think of if I’m being honest.” Sooyun pondered on the thought and turned her gaze to look at him, “do you have anything to look forward?”

Mav tilted his head slightly at Sooyun’s response. He didn’t want to pry too much on the why or if she had anything else, there was probably a reason behind it. “Well, my birthday’s in a few weeks,” He chuckled lightly. “I’d hope my 22nd year’s got less ass kicking. That and seeing my cousins in Daegu.”

Sooyun:

Sooyun giggled, "well...guess I better work on my own surprise for your birthday." She shrugged, who would have thought they would end up like this...not her, definitely thought things would have died out after getting her taste of him, but it was as if the thirst grew more each time they seen each other. "I bet your cousins are excited to see you.”

"Oh shit, watch out, Soo's coming in with the heat," Mav teased the brunette with a smile. He would've never thought things would blossom more between them. He figured, it was just the ache of the chase...but each time, he felt himself being more attracted to her each time...and he liked it. "Yeah, we talk every weekend and I visit them every spring. They're my tether to where I come from, you know?"

Sooyun:

Nodding her head, "Yeah I understand and I mean, you gotta do what you gotta do," Sooyun understood that maybe Maverick had a hard time getting in touch with his korean side, she was happy that her parents showed that to her and even taught her the language, she also knew that sometimes her parents did long to visit their family in south korea. "When is your birthday by the way."

“Yeah, I mean hey at least I speak Korean fluently, so that’s the upside you know?” Mav chuckled at the thought, but it did hit home for him. Here was Sooyun, who learned from her parents, who grew up more with her culture. In a way, he learned in his own way too, and sure he’s still westernized in someways, but in other ways, he was able to connect with those from his own culture which made him pretty damn stoked. “April 7th. It lands on a Wednesday which, lucky for me I’ve got one class...and I’m definitely not going to it,” he admitted with a laugh.

Sooyun:

Sooyun raised her eyebrows, not that far from her own birthday, "wow...our birthdays are close, interesting. Guess I have to get you a present as well." She commented, she wasn't great at accepting presents but giving them out was her favorite thing. "Are you even doing well enough to skip class?" She teased, she wondered if she should go back to college but she wasn't even certain for what, she currently had a steady gig and the fact her agent was working out projects for her band to climb the records.

“I told you only a few weeks apart,” Maverick chuckled. “I meeean you don’t have to, but the fact you’re mulling it over, I appreciate—even though it’s your day today,” He playfully nudged her with a smirk. At her comment about his classes he laughed shaking his head. “I’m obnoxiously ahead in class because of March madness. We’ve gotten our work in advance and I try getting it done the day it’s assigned. Gotta overachieve now to procrastinate later,” he explained with the biggest smile. It was thanks to having two overachieving sisters to teach him his studying habits. He stood up and held out his hand for Soo. “Our stop’s coming up, by the way.”

Sooyun:

"Must be nice, I was such a terrible student, I was certain my mom was about ready to give up on me. Saying something like, at least I have my looks to fall back on if I don't get a career that pays good." It was funny to think about her relationship with her mother when she was a teenager, thinking she knew everything and so much attitude. Sooyun looked out the window then looked back at Maverick, placing her hand into his without a second thought.

"Daaaamn," Mav shook his head. "Lowkey my dad would get that way when I start slacking off in school, so I get it to a certain extent," He chuckled. Mav and his dad were very close, although there were times where the man was hard on him. He figured, being the only boy and all, he had to live up to the expectations of a Maxwell man, to a point. He took her hand with a grin and began leading the way to head out, not before sliding a 20 to the bus driver Greg for coming through. "So, what would you like to do first? Get some food? Ride the ferris wheel? Head to the arcade?""

Sooyun:

Sooyun laughed and thought over what to do first, "Let's go grab food, i am craving a good hot dog." She admitted, the fact she was going to eat some junk food was probably the best plan as of right now considering all she has been snacking on was salad due to keeping a decent body image per her agents request. "and Ice cream after--then we can check out the arcade?"

"Ohhhh man. It's been a hot minute since I've had a hot dog from the pier, let's be real," Mav chuckled. He knew that today was the day that Soo was going to most likely splurge on some junk food, which was understandable. Hell, he did basketball, staying in shape and eating a balanced diet, was hard enough in the face of the food you really craved. "Yeah, we can do that. It's your day, I'm just here to lead you to the best spots here," He grinned excitedly.

Sooyun:

“Exactly, we just have to be sneaky when it comes to eating.” She motioned to their mask on their face, as much as she wanted too, she knew her agent would be upset with her if she were to expose she’s seeing Maverick. Sure her publicist probably could get some gossip out of it but she didn’t want to put him through that. “I mean if I had it my way, I would have suggested me and you, with chocolate all over your bed.”

“We can eat under the pier. No one really hangs out there,” Mav suggested with a shrug. He knew the risks of going out with Sooyun. All eyes were on them the moment those masks came off and the last thing they needed was Gossip God screaming about them being spotted. Which is why he planned it carefully, to avoid getting by caught. “That can be dessert,” He smirked, wiggling his eyebrows at her.

Sooyun:

“good idea, totally didn’t think of that.” Sooyun agreed as she pulled him by his hand towards the food stand, her stomach growling at the thought of food. “Maybe, or maybe I’ll just go home like a good girl. I think that sounds better.”

“No one ever thinks to chill under the Pier. Probably because people are scared it might topple on them or something but that shit’s sturdy as fuck,” He laughed as Soo dragged him to the food stand. Honestly he didn’t mind it because he was pretty hungry. “Knowing you at this point, you being a good girl would result in,” He looked around and leaned in to whisper into her ear, “You getting yourself off thinking about our last encounter.”

Sooyun:

“I mean...Cali is on the fault line so we are prone to earthquakes,” she shrugged, sure people were scared of certain things but mav did have a point in the pier being sturdy. Her eyes widen at his words and slapped his chest, “I do not.” Lying through her teeth since the last few times, sex flash back usually got her hot and bothered.

"That's a given, but the pier hasn't toppled over yet. Even the tiniest quake can't be felt on top of here. We've got pretty good luck on our side, I'd say," Mav wiggled his eyebrows with a smirk. At the smack on his chest, he let out a grunt and laughed. "Just by that reaction, I'd say you do. That's pretty hot."

Sooyun:

Sooyun pursed her lips, knowing that he couldn't see under her mask as she quickly looked away from him and rolled her eyes, "I do not...but you wouldn't know," She wasn't going to admit to anything as of lately but she knew that Mav had ways of getting things out of her one way or another. She walked ahead of him when it was their turn and held up a finger as she ordered her hot dog.

Maverick wanted to smile widely, but his eyes were clearly showing the shit-eating elation that he had knowing Sooyun wasn't going to admit it, but he knew deep down that she did. "Oh, I wouldn't hm? We'll see later," He practically said beaming as he followed her to the line. He waited patiently looking over the menu until it was his turn and decided to opt for the corn dog instead. He had a huge hankering for it.

Sooyun:

Sooyun dark eyes looked over at Maverick, snorting under her breath and shakes her head, “yeah right,” she responded and part of her was giddy, wanting to see if he would fall through with his promise. Sooyun smiled as she accepted the hot dog and walked over towards the side to add ketchup on top and slipped the bottle of water under her arm as she turned to wait for Maverick, “to be honest, I don’t really like corn dogs.”

“You’ll just have to wait and see,” Maverick emphasized in a sing-songy voice. He knew he’d follow through with his promise later on, but he didn’t want to deal with a hard on during their outing so he focused on the food instead. As he took the corn dog and his soda, he chuckled. “Wait really? How come? Is it too cakey???”

Sooyun:

Sooyun nodded her head, “I think it’s texture wise for me,” she didn’t care much for it, something about the way it taste just didn’t sit right with her. The brunette wasn’t exactly picky on food but certain ones just wasn’t her cup of tea. “So what should we do after this? Arcade? Let the food settle before going on rides?”

"That makes sense, honestly. Like certain textures can put people off and stuff. So I'm guessing you're not a big fan of the crunchy Korean hot dogs either?" Maverick asked with genuine curiosity. "Yeah, we could definitely hit up the arcade, wait for the food to settle and then we can do either the ferris wheel or the roller coaster afterwards?"

Sooyun:

she nodded her head, “Yeah, it just...meh,” Sooyun scrunched her nose at the thought. “Why not both? I mean...unless you’re scared,” she teased and laughing lightly, grabbing his hand again and pulled him towards the stairs to go under the pier. Without realizing she liked the feel of his hand in hers, it gave her comfort and almost to the point she wanted to sing a song but bit her lip to not.

"Too much texture, I'll keep that noted," Maverick nodded with a smile, although his smile couldn't be seen, his eyes definitely showed it. "Ohhhh, you know I live for the thrill, come on now!" He laughed as he interlocked their fingers, making their way down the stairs to go eat. The warmth between their hands said something, although he knew he shouldn't think too much into it. What he did know, however, is that he could get used to holding hands like this...someday, he thought to himself.

Sooyun:

Sooyun tried not to think about the possibilities of relationships with Maverick. After all, this was supposed to be just a fling, but now it was beyond that, the fact they got to know one another even more was blending the lines. She tried to shake off those thoughts as she walked towards under the shade where they could eat in private without the worry of someone spotting them.

What should have been a fling was now the lines being clearly blurred. In which, Maverick, holding her hand thought about what it would be like to actually be on an actual date with her, where they didn’t have to hide behind masks, and could publicly steal a kiss from her. He focused more on following Sooyun to a shady spot. “Is this spot good?” He asked curiously.

Sooyun:

“This spot should be fine,” Sooyun nodded her head, letting go of their hand as she took a seat on the sand, she pulled her mask down and looked over at him, chuckling lightly. “It’s kind of funny that we’re hiding under the pier to eat this, you know what we should have done, wore wigs.” Sooyun pointed out with a small shrug of her shoulders.

"Sweet," Mav nodded as he took a seat in the spot next to Soo, pulling his mask down to immediately dig into his corn dog. "True...except come on, you really think we'd get away that easily if we wore wigs," He nudged Soo lightly with a laugh. "I mean sure from behind we'd be unrecognizable but up close it'd be a wrap."

Sooyun:

Sooyun was eating the food in hand and laughed, covering her mouth to stop any food from falling out of her mouth, quickly swallowing down the food and nodded her head, "Oh c'mon...you know you would want to wear the pink bob cut wig, I think you would get a little sassy from it." She smirked as she took another bite.

Mav covered his own mouth at Soo's struggle to not laugh while eating, but mostly picturing himself with that pink blunt bob wig. "God," He began with a laugh. "Let's be real, I think I'd wind up making the boys all get one in different colors and recreating those tiktoks around town," He teased. "Don't be giving me ideas."

Sooyun:

"Please do it, I'm certain it will be a hit," She laughed at the thought of them in wigs, and even funnier at the fact they would be recreating a tiktok. Sooyun shakes her head and opened her water, taking a drink out of it before sighing, setting half of the hot dog in her lap. "I think gossip god would enjoy it."

"I'll have to hit up the guys first. I know AJ for sure would be on board. I'd have to sell my soul for Eric, and then I'd see how I'd hustle Joonie and Brandon into it..." He thought about it for a moment and laughed. He took another bite of his corn dog, and hummed out loud as he thought for a moment (and finished chewing). "I mean, he would, but he practically hates me for saying yes to every bit of gossip there is. He's given up."

Sooyun:

Sooyun smiled lightly and shakes her head, “I guess one would get frustrated. I mean I thought I would be able to kick you to the curb yet here we are,” she motioned between them, even though they were just having fun, Sooyun was still on the fence of dropping everything and disappear. “I can see what you mean though, they’re never gonna stop if you give them the attention. Almost like those annoying paparazzi.”

"Yeah...I guess sometimes things have a sick way of working out, huh?" Maverick teased with a laugh. The future was uncertain between them, even though they were fooling around, they were practically on a date, eating and laughing and having a good time...and he secretly feared of everything just vanishing one day. "Exactly. Only way to get them off your back is be like 'yeah sure', and keep it moving. My sisters and I purposely pose whenever there's a paparazzo on our tails and that pretty much scares 'em off cause they can't get money off of poses."

Sooyun:

“that actually sounds nice, I wish I had siblings, my parents only wanted one kid and here I am.” Sooyun shared, she wasn’t supposed to be talking about this with him but she couldn’t stop herself from blabbering out, at least she wasn’t stuttering. “But I can now see what you guys face with. It sounds very exhausting and even I’m not even close to being famous, I can only guess it will get even more hectic.” Sooyun started to finish the hot dog, sighing with content at the taste and crunched up the wrap.

And just like that, Soo piqued Maverick's curiosity. Of course, he had to try not to make it so obvious that he wanted to know more, but he was genuinely interested. "Wow...I mean in a way it must be peaceful, but it must suck y'know? How'd you cope being an only child?" Maverick asked curiously. "Yeah, it's been like that all of our lives, but we've learned to cope. I mean when I went to Korea for the first time, my cousins and I would roam around in masks so we weren't detected. So I brought that habit. Maybe you could use that for when you do get big and famous," He offered with a grin. Realizing Sooyun had finished and he had still a bit left with his corn dog, he took a rather large bite and quickly covered his mouth, trying to crunch as softly as he could.

Sooyun:

“let’s just say I spent a lot of time playing music and making up scenarios,” Sooyun lightly shrugged, it was a lonely time but it made time pass by. “My parents wanted to make life easier for me because it wasn’t easy for my dad when he was growing up.” She started playing with the sand and scooped it up to let it slip between her fingers. “If I get famous...been kind of hectic here and there.”

Maverick frowned a little, he couldn’t imagine how much of a lonely childhood Soo had, but at least she had music to give her solace, if anything else. “That’s understandable. Guessing it probably wasn’t easy growing up in a household with a lot of siblings for him?” He asked curiously. He took one last bite, finishing up his corn dog and finally took a sip of his soda. “If??! Your music goes hard as fuck! There’s no way you’d flop.”

Sooyun:

“He never really liked talking about his family, he packed his things and moved, met my nom and the rest is history.” Sooyun always wondered why he didn’t look back but she also knew that talking about it bothered him. The brunette felt the corner of her lips lift up, “Thanks...just some days I feel as if I’m not good enough—that I would let my family down and such.” She trailed off in thought, dusting off her hands and wiped them on her pants. “Let’s check out the rides.”

“Sounds pretty serious. Hopefully one day, he can share that story with you and if not, you know, at least you know that your parents succeeded in giving you a better life, right?” Mav offered with a reassuring smile. The same way she was there for him, he offered the same back to her. “I don’t think anyone would like a talent like you to go to waste. I’m sure your family’ll be proud of you, if not more proud soon,” He chuckled lightly. Getting up and crumpling the foil and the can, he grinned excitedly. “Sweet! Oh, the trash bin’s by the stairs, so we can throw our stuff out on the way up.”

Sooyun:

Sooyun gathered the garbage, nodding her head and followed along side them, “awesome. Then let us go,” she walked ahead, realizing that she was a bit over sharing but wasn’t that what he did when he needed someone? Sooyun tried not to dwell on those thoughts as she walked up the steps and adjusted the mask on her face along with her hat. “Let’s Go on the small rollercoaster.”

Mav grinned and started heading towards the trash bin walking side to side as they disposed of their garbage and made their way up the stairs. He quietly contemplated about the things he was learning about Soo tonight, and how, in a way, he could see her. “YES! Leggo!” He grinned excitedly as he took her hand to head to the ticket booth for the rollercoaster.

Sooyun:

Sooyun smiled as she followed after Maverick, seeing that he was more excited about this then she was, it was nice to see him look excited but also she knew if he didn’t wear the mask and gave her his famous smile, her heart would skip a few beats. It was a dangerous game. “Slow down,” she chuckled.

Maverick hoped that Soo was having a good time above all else. He was enthusiastic about the rollercoaster like a kid on Christmas and he couldn’t help but smile wide. Slowing down, at Soo’s request he looked over at her and realized she was smiling too. It sucked that the masks covered half their faces but even by the way her eyes sparkled, he knew. “And just our luck, the lines aren’t even long! No going back now,” he teased with a laugh.

Sooyun:

she grinned happily as she chuckled softly, running up with him towards the ride and sighed, “that means we get to ride the front seat,” the brunette followed after him and took a seat. “I’m just glad they don’t take your picture like at Disney land.”

“That’s the best part. Get to feel the motion of the coaster,” Mav grinned excitedly. He took a seat next to her and then chuckled, “Yeah, thank fuck for that. There’ve been some unflattering Disneyland pics from when I go...oh speaking of before you buckle yourself in...” His voice lowered. “We might want to take off the masks otherwise they’re gonna go flying off. Don’t worry, there’s not a lot of people on and once we’re back down, we can put them back on.”

Sooyun:

Sooyun raised her eyebrows at him before sighing as she nodded her head, pulling the mask off and slipping it into her pants pocket, seeing his face without the mask had her stare a little longer than usual before pulling her eyes away to buckle inside. “If we get a photo of us and posted on the gossip page, I’m going to strangle you.” She grumbled playfully and reached out to lightly pinch his cheek.

Maverick gave Soo a knowing look as she sighed as he took off his own mask and pocketed it and began to buckle himself into the ride. He glanced over at Sooyun to make sure she was okay, mostly because he felt her staring at him, not that he'd complain because he'd be doing the same in their situation. "I like it rough, you know this," He teased. "But don't worry, we won't."

Sooyun:

oh she knew that he liked it rough, just as much as she did, it made things less complicated like the term making love, she tried not to put her heart into the situation but she was now having a hard time with him on not blurring the lines. “I haven’t been on a rollercoaster in a long time.” Sooyun admitted, settling back into the seat, “but I know it’s nothing like six flags.”

The exchange of knowing looks between the two was all the more reassuring for Maverick about how their night was going to go after all. Even if it didn’t end in sex, he knew that the night would end pretty well—but they ran the risk of blurring the lines and this, was one of them. “Wait really??? Damn, how come?” He asked curiously, as the ride was beginning to get secure. “Oh man, six flags is one helllllll of a place. I miss taking trips there.”

Sooyun:

“just never had time,” it was the only logical excuse she could give, between working two jobs and trying to remain sane, she just didn’t bring herself going on rides. Sooyun slipped her cap off her head and tucked it into her sweater so it wouldn’t go flying off “although now I can say I went on a ride thanks to you, and eating a very questionable hot dog.”

“Ah, that’s true. Adulting and shit,” Maverick nodded in understanding. Life did have its way of stopping the fun for a while, which sucked, in retrospect. He didn’t want to dwell on that though. “Well, I’m glad I was here to be of service for your rare moment of shenanigans,” He winked.

Sooyun:

Sooyun giggled as she leaned her head back against the seat, “I can’t wait to see the sunset. We have to go on the ferris wheel,” she enjoyed the sunsets, which was probably why she never moved out of Santa Monica. Nothing ever beats the beauty of that. Sooyun felt the butterflies going crazy as the ride started, tightening her hold on the ride.

Maverick took a quick glance at his watch and nodded, “We’ve got another half hour before the sunset begins, so I got you. We could most likely go after this ride!” He enjoyed Soo’s enthusiasm and could see her eyes lighting up about the Ferris wheel. At least there, they could easily be without masks until they got back to the bottom. Most of all, he’d get two amazing views. As the ride began, Maverick held on tight and smiled excitedly, feeling the adrenaline rushing through.

Sooyun:

Sooyun laughed lightly at the giddy feeling, sure it wasn’t like the rollercoasters from knots berry farm but it definitely was still a ride that made her scream with laughter. The sound of the metal clacking as the rose up high. She raised her arms up high and closed her eyes at the feeling of dropping.

Maverick looked over at Soo having a good time and he, too couldn’t help but laugh and cheer along with her. As the coaster began its ascent up on the hill, he raised his hands up and yelled excitedly as the drop began.

Sooyun:

after the ride, Sooyun got out of her spot and ran her fingers through her now messy hair, smiling as she pulled at his hand and walked out, completely forgetting about her mask as she adjusted the cap back onto her head. “That was amazing,” she turned around grinning up at him. “Your hair is a mess.” She reached out to tame his hair, standing on her tippy toes to reach the top of his head.

The ride was amazing, between laughs and twists and turns, it was definitely well worth it. As they got off the ride, Mav chuckled at Soo trying to fix his hair and so he knelt down just a little for her to help him out. That was when he realized, feeling the breeze against his face. “We should um...” He pointed to his face. As much as he hated having the mask on, it was better safe than sorry.

Sooyun:

“oh...right,” she dropped her hand from his head, realizing that she wanted to be in public with Mav, hold hands and kiss him whenever she wanted. She reached into her sweater to pull her mask out and placed it over her face.

Mav gave an apologetic smile to Sooyun as he put his own mask on. He wished he had the opportunity to hold her hand and kiss her, but...things were complicated and he didn’t want to complicate them further. Instead, he took her hand again after her mask was on and nodded towards the Ferris wheel.

Sooyun:

Sooyun smiled under her mask and followed after him, her hand weaving their fingers together as they walked side by side. When was the last time she had a content time with someone that didn’t involve sexual desires. Sure it was still there but she wanted something...more? Soo crushed those thoughts from overthinking it anymore as they waited in line and looked up at the top of the ride.

As they walked, Maverick looked over at Soo and smiled through his own mask, feeling their fingers interlock with each other made him just slightly giddy, but he had to push that down. They were just friends, who occasionally fucked, just having a good time. But it was hard when he began to crave more, especially on a day like today. “Huh, line’s pretty low on the Ferris wheel too, who would’ve thunk?!”

Sooyun:

Sooyun chuckled, “did you just say thunk?” She pulled her attention away from the top of the Ferris wheel and towards maverick. Shaking her head as they inched closer to the ride and looked around. “But you’re right...I wonder if we just picked a lucky day or you know there’s other things happening.”

“Listen, in my defense...I was raised by white people,” Maverick laughed, playfully nudging Soo with a grin. Once they made it to board the ride he grinned brightly and admitted, “Today just so happened to be the slowest day of the Pier. Which is why taking you out for your birthday would be easy. Gives you less of a chance of getting caught but still with enough people around to give it that atmosphere.”

Sooyun:

Sooyun realized that he put a lot of thought in this day, it warmed her heart that he put this much effort to make it a good one. She got up from her side and shuffled over to where he was sitting, grabbing his face and pulling down his mask along with hers and gave him a kiss, it was a soft kiss that held a lot of emotion behind it, not wanting speak out loud on her feelings or even ruin the moment. “Thank you for today,” she whispered and pulled away to look at the ocean.

Maverick was taken by the view, each and every time. Even though he had been here his whole life, there was just something about the view that made it feel even more like home. However, his thoughts then landed on Soo, how her gaze softened and suddenly, he was taken aback by her kiss, it was a good kiss, a soft kiss that felt so much more than just a lusting type of kiss. At her whisper he nodded, breathlessly and then he did something what he hadn’t done in such a long time. He walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her, and pressed a kiss to her cheek, softly whispering, “Happy birthday.”

Sooyun:

Sooyun smiled, it was for a brief moment that she basked in the feeling, everything seemed as if it was a dream, between the sudden arrival of him at her place, both of them riding the city bus to standing here at the pier. Sooyun knew that today was a good idea, just when she thought it wouldn't be. Maverick had a way to wiggle his way into your heart, and it was for that brief moment that she felt at peace.

Maverick was pretty happy at the way the evening had gone. His chin rested on Sooyun’s shoulder as he watched how serene she looked looking upon the ocean as the sun dipped below the horizon. It was a peaceful and euphoric moment that he wanted to last as long as it could for her, so he held her close until the Ferris wheel began its slow descent back to ground.

#para #p:Sooyun #WHEW #two formats down

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dansnaturepictures · 4 years ago

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02/02/21-Goosander at Lakeside again on world wetlands day, first Lesser Black-backed Gull of the year out the back, tribute to Captain Tom and more: 10 different pictures to those tweeted tonight

I wanted to start tonight’s blog as I did with my tweets of the day’s pictures with sending my condolences to the family of the legendary, heroic and iconic and wonderful man, Captain Sir Tom Moore. He has truly done so much for this country, fighting in one of the most horrific and grueling campaigns in a World War for our freedom, and then in the greatest fight and challenge the nation has seen since the COVID-19 pandemic he inspired and uplifted a nation and gave a nation in tatters the hope and unity it so desperately needed. Primarily with his sensational fundraising efforts for our incredible NHS at the most critical of times, to being number one in the music singles charts on his 100th birthday. And the reason I suppose I am writing about him on my specific wildlife and photography social media accounts and not just the general ones is the #WalkWithTom initiative started in the second national English lockdown in November which gave my walks especially the weekday lunch time ones a new meaning, they had uplifted and helped keep me going but now I could share that daily exercise walk with millions of others and mark how that daily walk keeps me going. So its with that in mind that I send my very best wishes and deepest condolences to his family, all close friends and those who worked with him over the past year. Its my daily walk that makes up most of my blog today, so I hereby dedicate this blog to Captain Sir Tom Moore.

I took the first five of ten exclusive pictures to this blog compared to my Twitter Dans_Pictures today on my walk before getting to Lakeside Country Park and within there today. A day that is World Wetlands Day and it made me appreciate just how much valuable wetland habitat for birds and later on insects in the spring and summer Lakeside has. So I set myself a brief this lunch time as I walked to try and capture that and I felt the third picture along with some I tweeted achieved that. I took some pictures I was really happy with using my new lens today again.

I had my long distant specialist bridge camera with me as well as yesterday I noticed a quite rare for here Goosander on the westernmost lake. I know they are a creature of habit and like other rarer birds of the lakes I have noticed whilst working from home and coming here every day could stick around. Today I was delighted when I noticed the bird was still here. Like yesterday it frequented the middle of the lake so my P900 bridge camera lent itself well to getting pictures of this beautiful male bird, including the sixth and seventh in this photoset it was nice to where I saw it with a Cormorant nearby yesterday see it near to Black-headed Gulls. I witnessed some smashing behaviour that I never had with this species today as I watched it. Firstly how fast they are! Both when it dived under the water and when it emerged it was suddenly almost the other side of the lake and seeing it absolutely motor across the surface of the water. Both equally as amazing, and I also saw my first ever fly I think when it was possibly spooked by a group of Great Crested Grebes flying over. I did walk down south along the lakes through the central grassy path bit where it flew but didn’t see it again. I wonder if I will see it again.

Within this walk down I took the eighth picture in this photoset of a view and saw a very decent sized group of Tufted Ducks also brightening up the lake there seem to be a lot here lately not just one pair as it very often was, I liked taking pictures of these as I tweeted. I photographed the Greylag Geese and another view on the way out of Lakeside in the final two pictures in this photoset.

Whilst working again soon after lunch I was delighted to detect the slate grey back of a Lesser Black-backed Gull among gulls seen flying from my room over the houses. This was my first seen this year and one of my key targets. I was thrilled to see it to become my 104th bird of 2021 and ensure - and it was never guaranteed with where we are in the world - that I have still got at least one bird year tick in every month since November 2015. February, March and you could even say April depending on the type of spring with the migration would normally be months I would always get at least one year tick in to start the year but it may not be this year so you may see me say that line a lot more than previous years! When I might only start saying it later on. A relief today whilst people’s health is obviously the most important thing.

This was one of my latest ever first sightings in a year of a Lesser Black-backed Gull, and that is explained by the fact that 60% of the years I’ve seen Lesser Black-backed Gull the first place I saw it in the year was the wonderful Blashford Lakes where I haven’t been since last March due to the pandemic but where I would normally go to tick of common and some rarer species in the first few days of the year. Of the other 40% in the years I have seen this species only a sighting on my birthday (7th January) at WWT Slimbridge in 2019 where we went before we got to Blashford is an early sighting in a year i.e. within the first couple of weeks. So it just goes to show if you take a place away from your disposal the story of your year for a bird can alter, this fairly common gull being beaten by arguably rarer cousins or similar birds Common Gull, Mediterranean Gull and Sandwich Terns in terms of me seeing them this year. Lesser Black-backed Gulls normally turn up at Lakeside, out the back and the green out the front in early spring and do stay later into the spring and summer so I knew it was going to be a possibility to see it soon and I am so happy that was today.

Wildlife Sightings Summary: My first Lesser Black-backed Gull of the year, great views of one of my favourite birds the Great Crested Grebe with a nest already being built by two, Goosander, Mallard, Tufted Duck, Coot, Moorhen, Black-headed Gull, Robin, House Sparrow, Starling, Woodpigeon and Collared Dove. I was sad not to see a Goldfinch yesterday I do not believe so I was comforted to see some on the feeder as I started work today and see some later on too as they always seemed to be around. Pied Wagtail was around in the garden too and yet again in huge numbers on the green out the front on my walk they snuck into one of the photos I tweeted on Dans_Pictures and also see one picking over some food waste left on the road I am seeing them a lot on the road outside lately as I photographed last week.

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sokkathebluewolf · 4 years ago

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I don't know if I'm annoying you with these questions but I guess I'm just asking anyways. I'm just very curious. Did you think about real birthday for the most important characters? I mean we know Sokkas birthday December 5th and Azulas birthday some date in June right? But I mean the others (most important guards and Song and more) you know? And are we gonna find out more about Shaofeng as a person in general in the future? Maybe just a little bit?

Well, I didn’t really plan on specific birthdays besides Azula and Sokka since theirs were the ones that would feature in the story. I remember some time ago I said I wanted Sokka’s during December, I got a fair amount of input by people and the outcome was that I settled on December 5th. Meanwhile, Azula’s birthday is on the summer solstice, serving as a pseudo explanation for why she’s such a unique firebender, so hers would be around June 21 (I’d pick 21 since the solstice oscilates (apparently) between 20-22, so it’s an average, I guess? xD).

Everyone else, though, has remained a mystery so far. Basically the logic I follow is what the Lost Scrolls said about certain seasons favoring the birth of benders of each type. It’s not written as a certainty, it says “they’re born more often”, so I went the extra mile and guessed that the more prodigious benders are likely born in solstices or equinoxes or so. It doesn’t mean EVERY good bender is born near a solstice or an equinox, but in what I write, the ones who have the most outstanding skills would be likely born closer or during a solstice or equinox.

Therefore... Azula on June 21 (summer solstice), Toph on March 20, Aang on September 22 or 23. These three are really the only ones I really would consider genuine prodigies, both by their feats and their unique bending styles, so the only ones I’d really feature being born in equinoxes or solstices.

The books also say that they’re born MORE OFTEN in the season related to their element. It doesn’t mean it always happens, so some benders may be born in different seasons altogether, but in general I’ll try to make it so the majority of the benders are born within the boundaries of the season their element is connected with.

Now then, as you asked, I’ll try to share proposed birthdates for the characters I listed in the other ask. As usual, a disclaimer is necessary: I do not speak for anything related to canon. None of the birthdays I’ll give out are solid fact EXCEPT the ones of the OCs, since they’re mine and I do get a say upon their birthdays. Everything else is conjecture and if Bryke suddenly decides to release a list of birthdays just to make fun of me, sadly, their choices have priority over mine. This is only pertaining Gladiator, therefore, only a fan’s guesses.

Everyone else in the list of character ages, then, off the top of my head...

Han: January 11th

Shuren: September 3rd

Qiang: August 13th

Fei Li: November 28th

Renkai: June 15th

Rui Shi: August 25th

Haoren: April 9th

Tai Wei: August 29th

Wuhan: March 5th

Jianghuo: October 8th

Taro: June 30th

Aang: (already stated but here goes again :’D) September 22 or 23

Jeong Jeong: possibly about June 23rd or so, close to the solstice.

Iroh: mid September, maybe September 10 or so -- it’s still summer, but leaning towards other seasons since Iroh is known to be a firebender who draws power from other cultures/bending arts.

Ozai: early July (probably the 1st)

Hakoda: March 25th, maybe? (he’s not a bender soooo~ anything goes xD)

Kya: around May 2nd

Zhao: around August 7th

Ursa: around February 12th or so

Piandao: June 29th (this so it’s extra painful that his parents abandon him for not being born a bender, implying they outright PLANNED for a pregnancy with a baby delivered in summer so they could play at eugenics... and then he was a non-bender. Honestly, Piandao is a tragic guy)

Tiang: March 14th

Lu Ten: possibly June 10th (much like his father, I figure Lu Ten can have a birthday close to summer but in his case he’s outright in Spring territory because why not? :’D)

Kuei: sometime in October, maybe the 17th (as stubborn as I wrote him, I just don’t see Kuei as that close to his element? It felt kinda fun to give him a more air-related birthday...)

Hahn: sometime in November, could be the 9th

Haru: either April or May? April 30th, May 1st?

Zuko: by my closest Zuko advisor’s suggestion (@jordanalane) September 20th

Jet: mid-November, 14th, maybe

Yue: ... curiously I’d dare make her a solstice baby? despite she’s not a bender? because she’s probably the canonical closest character to an element...? :’D December 21st

Jin: February 18th

Rhone: January 31st

Sokka: (already stated but here goes again :D) December 5th

Kori Morishita: close to April 28th (in this case, Yang, rather than Bryke, should take precedence in choosing her birthday :’D)

Mai: haha, for the lols I’d choose her birthday in May, probably May 24th?

Suki: by my closest Suki advisor’s suggestion (@jordanalane, again xD), September 27th.

Azula: (already stated above too but here goes again :D) June 21st.

Katara: close but not QUITE on the solstice, so around December 24th?

Ty Lee: maybe around August 15th

Song: probably in February? February 25th?

Kino: December 30th. He is a Water Tribesman by heart (?)

Toph: (already stated above but here we go) March 20th

Teo: sometime around October, the 26th?

Shoji: maybe November for Shoji, November 12th.

Rei: November 13th.

Tom-Tom: maybe around January 4th?

Yuudai: April 20th.

Mari: January 28th.

*breeeeathes* Comprehensive enough? xD

And yes, we’ll find out more about Shaofeng (though not his birthday because he’s very secretive about his personal information and even I can’t know about it (?)). There’s going to be a certain scene in the second-to-last arc in Part 2 where we’ll learn more about his past, and then we’ll see much more than that in Part 3′s flashbacks, as long as I can make it fit in the story.

Thanks for the ask!

#ask #anon #character birthdays

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lovemesomesurveys · 5 years ago

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Have you ever read the Hunger Games series? Yep and watched all the movies. I was really into it at the time. When was the last time you ran into something? Hmm. I don’t recall. Do you enjoy dressing up? Nah. Do you live in the city or a rural area? I live in the city. Would you say you have a sense of style? My sense of style consists of mostly graphic tees and leggings, but also some Adidas clothes. And shoes.

What’s your biggest fear? This question comes up all the damn time. Have you ever been bitten by a wild animal? Nooo. Are you close to any of your cousins? Aww, I used to be close to a few of my cousins. Not anymore, though. :( That’s all my fault. I became really distant and withdrawn from friends and even family outside of my immediate family. Have you ever been lost in the woods? No, thankfully. Where did you last travel? Disneyland back in February. Do you enjoy driving? I don’t drive. What song did you last listen to? I mentioned this in a previous survey already, but I’ve had Savage by Megan the Stallion stuck in my head because of TikTok. If you have a job, how often do you work? I don’t have a job. What time do you normally go to sleep at night? For the past month I’ve been going to bed after 6AM. :X Do you watch a lot of movies? Hmm. Not a lot, no. I watch more TV shows. Do you like Tom Petty? ”Now I’m freeeeeee Free fallin’.” Would you rather have snow or rain? I love rainy days. It doesn’t snow here, but I wish it did. Do you own a lot of sweaters? I own a lot of sweatshirts. Have you ever tried rock-climbing? Well, no. For obvious reasons. Ever ridden in a police car? Nope. Favorite decade of music? That’s tough cause I like music that spans across decades, but I think the 90s and early 2000′s will hold a special spot. Have any of your best friends been your best friend longer than a year? My longest was my best friend of 15 years. Ever witnessed a murder? Noooo. Does your room have a ceiling fan? Yep. Have you ever tried blogging? Before Tumblr I had Xanga for a long time. Favorite television channel? E!, MTV, The Hallmark Channel, TeenNick, TVLand, and the ID Channel. Have you ever lied under oath? I’ve never had to be under oath. What are your religious views? I’m a Christian. When did you last change your bed sheets? A week ago. Would you consider yourself a flirt? No. At what age do you plan to be married? I don’t plan on getting married. Do you eat a lot of junk food? Honestly, all I eat is sandwiches, ramen, eggs, and Wingstop. Sometimes pizza and pasta. When did you last go on vacation? I’ve answered this 3 times now tonight, but I went to Disneyland back in February. Are you resilient? I was when I was younger. Definitely not anymore. Have you ever failed a subject before? I failed one math course in community college and had to retake it again. I ended up doing a lot better the 2nd time. I honestly believe it’s because I had a better teacher. If so, what was the class? ^^^ Do you wear more bright or dull colors? Dull. Majority of my clothes are black. Do you know anyone who has attempted suicide? Yes. What’s your favorite quote? Blah. How many clocks are in your house? Like 20 including all the electronics. Do you play any sports? Nope. What is your biggest life regret? I have a lot of those. Have you ever been injured in a car accident? No, thankfully. If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you be? Well obviously right now I only want to be at home, but I look forward to the day I can go to the beach. Have you ever had highlights in your hair? Yeah, I had them for years. Favorite fast food restaurant? I’m not into fast food anymore like I used to be. I was a fast food junkie before. The only takeout I’m into is Wingstop. And pizza from a local place, but I haven’t had that in awhile. In what country were you born? US of A. Are your eyes more than one color? Nope, just brown. Have you ever caught something on fire? Something in the microwave once, something in the oven once, the tips of my hair.... What would you consider your biggest flaw? Oh boy where to start. What do you think your best quality is? I don’t know. Do you enjoy listening to others’ problems? I used to be the person people came to if they needed advice or just someone to talk to and I was good at it. I liked being there and helping any way I could. People told me they felt comfortable talking to me and I was easy to talk to. It could also be overwhelming and draining at times. Especially leading up to when I fell into a really low, dark place a few years ago. I couldn’t be that person anymore. I wasn’t in a good headspace. I pushed everyone away and became very distant and withdrawn. That was 4 years ago and I’m still out of that place. :/

Do you keep any plants in your house? Nope. What is your mother’s occupation? She’s a manager at Walgreens. Do any of your friends like your musical style? My family and I share some musical interests. What are you most looking forward to? I wanna say this quarantine ending, but I know resuming life in the real world would also be making me anxious when the time comes. I guess I’m most excited for seeing Gabie again, because I haven’t seen March 7th. <<< SAME to the first part. What was your favorite television show as a child? Disney Channel, Nickelodeon, PBS, Saturday morning cartoons on ABC, WB Kids... all the kid shows in the 90s, basically. Are you afraid of insects? YES. ALL of them. Are you cold-natured? I’m very warm blooded, I feel like I’m always hot. I like when I’m actually cold and can wear a hoodie/sweatshirt or curl up under a blanket. How old were you when you got your first pet? We had a dog when I was a baby. Did you / do you enjoy high school? I liked parts of it. What would you say was your favorite age? Childhood. What annoys you most about social networking? Trolls, fake news, cancel culture.

Are you the center of attention most of the time? Nooo. I never want to be the center of attention. What are you currently reading? I’m starting the 2nd book in the Jack Ryder Mystery Series by Willow Rose. When did you last go to the library? Sometime back in 2014 when I was still in school. Are you ill at the moment? Not with a virus or anything like that, thankfully. I just always feel crappy for other reasons. Do people tease you about anything? How I’m too sensitive. How late did you stay up last night and why? Last night I went to bed at 4 in the morning, which is really early for me these days. Have you ever written poetry? I dabbled with it when I was 16. I still have the diary I wrote them in and yikes they’re so cringe-y haha. Curtains or shades? Curtains. How many people have you spoken to in the last hour? Zero, everyone in my house is asleep. Do you tend to text a lot? Nope. Ever lost a great best friend? Yes. What is your favorite kind of flower? Eh, I just say roses but I don’t really have one. Do you own any guns? No. What would you say is your favorite book of all-time? I could never choose. What’s your least favorite part of the day? Late evening always seems to go by really slow.

Have you ever won an award for a speech? No. Do you tend to curse a lot? Nah. Have you ever played on the Ouija board? Nooo. I don’t mess with that kind of stuff. Do you sleepwalk? Nope. Have you ever slept on the floor before? Yeah. Are you a fan of public displays of affection? I don’t care for like heavy make out sessions or groping all over each other, but I don’t care about a kiss, cuddling, or hand holding. When did you last attend a yard sale? When I was a kid. We had a family friend who had them often. What goals do you wish to accomplish tomorrow? I don’t have anything I want to accomplish tomorrow. When is your birthday? July 28th. What was the best part of today? It’s only 430 in the morning. Do you attempt to stay away from drama? Involving me yes, but I like celebrity gossip and drama. What liquid did you last drink? Starbucks Doubleshot energy drink. Do you ever prefer to be alone? Yeah, I need to have some alone time. Have you ever had a deadly animal as a pet? No. Favorite Disney movie? Alice in Wonderland, Winnie the Pooh, A Goofy Movie, and Toy Story. Have you ever been to the beach? Countless times. I love the beach. If you have, how many times have you been? ^^^^ What was your dream occupation at age ten? I wanted to be a teacher back then. Are you terrified at the idea of weight-gain? No. I’m underweight and need to gain some weight. Do you drink a lot of water? I only get like 2-3 glasses a day. :X Does your room have carpet or hard-wood floors? Carpet. Do you take naps daily? No.

Who were you named after? No one in particular. Do you plan on traveling this spring or summer? No, we’re still going to be dealing with all this. :/ Do you know anyone who is colorblind? Nope. Have you ever been a teacher’s pet? I guess so. I was always the good kid, the “pleasure to have in class.” Teachers loved me. What is your absolute favorite hobby? Reading, surveys, coloring. Ever been to a tanning bed before? No. I have no interest in that. Are you satisfied with your financial stability? I have enough to pay my bills and a little extra for other stuff, so I’m grateful for that. Who is your favorite actor / actress? Alexander Skarsgard. Are your nails painted? Nope. Do you ever accidentally talk to inanimate objects? Not accidentally, but I talk to inanimate objects when they don’t cooperate. More like talk shit, but haha. What’s your favorite flavor of ice cream? Strawberry. Have you ever kissed someone of the same gender? No. Do you receive any hate mail? No. Have you ever sent a letter in the mail? Yeah. If you could, would you have a pen pal? I did in 3rd grade. It was fun. We even got to meet them toward the end of the year during a field trip. I wouldn’t want one now, though. What color are the pants you’re wearing? I’m wearing black leggings. What is your life philosophy? Hmm. Who last sent you a goodnight text message? No one does. Do you own any clothes that are your favorite color? Yeah. One of my favorite colors is black and most of my clothes are black. I have a few items that are my other favorite colors as well. Have you ever been in a hot tub before? Once for a short time. I didn’t like it. What’s your favorite comedy movie? I have several, but the one that came to mind first was Bridesmaids. In which year were you born? 1989.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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purplesurveys · 4 years ago

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1082

survey by joojie313

Who have you hugged in the past month? Andi, Angela, and Hans. And I believe I hugged a number of relatives over the Christmas season too.

Who did you last drink or smoke up with? I vaped and drank with Andi last night in the car after our dinner. We drove to UP (the first time I’ve been there since March, so it felt wilddd) and went to one of the secluded streets where we wouldn’t be caught doing either, haha. Then tonight I have a video call with my college friends which will also double as a drinking session.

What furniture do you own? I own none of the furniture that we have here at home since my parents bought all of them.

How many board games do you own? Like 5 or 6, not sure. Most were given as gifts during my 7th birthday; we just never threw any of them out because board games never get outdated and they’re always great to pull out during parties or when the electricity goes out.

How often do you find yourself doing laundry? Never, unless Cooper pees on my blanket in which case I have to wash it myself. He he hasn’t done since he was a puppy, though.

What are some names that seem to be coming up a lot in your life lately? I don’t know what this means, but I guess none? My friends don’t ask about Gabie unless I raise it first, which I appreciate them for doing. Other than that I don’t really have beef or issues with anyone to the point that they have to be a recurring name in my life.

What does your BIGGEST mug look like? I don’t have a giant mug; all the ones I have seem to carry the same amount of liquid. I’d love to have one of those though, so you just gave me an idea haha.

Newest musical discovery? Haven’t really been seeking out music lately and I’m okay with that. See my first answer in the survey I took before this.

Last thing you cleaned? My glasses.

What exactly do you carry around all your stuff in? I have a white shoulder bag that I use whenever I go out. I bring my wallet, phone, and charger everywhere and also my laptop - because I never know when an urgent/emergency work-related task will come in.

What do you carry around, typically? ^ Those four items are my main essentials. And of course my car keys, for when I’m in my destination already. I also bring with me hand sanitizer, my perfume, and a pen and notepad just in case I need to quickly write something down.

Where is your newest scar? Everywhere; Cooper has been scratching me a lot lately. I have a scar running from my right thumb all the way down to the middle of my wrist because of him.

Where is your oldest scar? It’s probably the one on my right ring toe from when it got caught in my bicycle gears as a kid.

What is your Mercury sign? Haha just look it up. Nope. No astrology for me.

Last thing you disposed of? The receipts from my gifts for Andi. Haha at first I felt kind of sore that I spent so much for their gifts (~$45), but when they told me they cried once they saw it, I immediately felt relief and I no longer thought about the money. They have been wanting to experiment with clothes for a while now, so I was one step ahead of them and got them a dress and skirt to start.

Are you good at recovering from injuries? I don’t really get injured a lot, so when I do it’s not that bad. My worst injury was a sprained ankle and it got better in like 2 days.

How many different public restrooms have you used this week? Zero. I avoid public restrooms as much as I can, but then again most of them are still closed off to this day because of the pandemic, so.

What colour are the hand rails at your house? They were I think originally brown when we first moved in, but my mom didn’t like it and so she painted it black herself.

How’s the paint job? It’s not bad. It’s not perfect and some parts are thicker than others, but it was a labor of love and a DIY thing so I think its imperfections add up to its overall charm.

Do you have more piercings or tattoos? Piercings, only because I have no tattoos at all.

What is the sum of the two facets above? Two.

What was the last picture someone sent you? Andi sent me the selfie we took together last night, but I don’t want to share our faces. Other than selfies this was the last one I received, from Angela:

Did you hear a siren today? I don’t think so. I did see a couple of ambulances yesterday though, but also no siren.

What do you typically drink? Water or coffee.

Last bad news you heard? Some PR crisis that blew up yesterday. It wasn’t any of the clients I handle though, so at least there’s that.

Last good news you heard? Blanch was sharing with me her experience with antidepressants and seeing a doctor for her mental health to be diagnosed, and I was really happy for and proud of her.

How much change do you have on you, roughly? I don’t know about change but as for money, I have P500 flat in my wallet rn.

What is a strength of yours? People feel comfortable sharing their feelings and secrets with me. I must be doing something right and I’m glad that’s the case.

What do you feel good about today? No work issues to worry about anymore (there was one this morning, but it’s since been resolved), it’s a weekend, I have coffee beside me, and I’m seeing my friends and drinking with them later :)

When was the last time you just looked up at the sky and smiled? No idea. When I look at the sky, it means something is wrong, or that I feel bittersweet. I’ve never associated this activity with being happy, at least not yet.

#survey #surveys

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cosmojaems · 5 years ago

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1, 3, 6 and 24 for the kpop ask game :) thanks!

thank you so much for sending these in! 🥺🥰 im so sorry for the late reply though, I’ve been sick all day and haven’t been able to answer these, but I’m okay now

1. What was the first song you heard by your bias group? When did you hear it?

I’ll just do my main ult groups or otherwise we’d be here all day:

BTS: the first song I heard was blood, sweat & tears in January 2017, because my sister made me watch the mv

NCT: the first song I heard was probably the 7th sense tbh, and i think it was sometime in 2017, but I didn’t start stanning them until 2018.

Seventeen: the first song I heard was either very nice or pretty u, because my sister played those a lot in like 2017. I didn’t start stanning them until don’t wanna cry era though.

Pristin (disbanded): first song I heard was wee woo when they debuted in March 2017

3. Who is your ultimate bias and why?

okay so,, I have like a few ult biases, so I’ll just list them. could go on about my ults forever tbh.

Jungkook (bts): he was probably my first bias in kpop tbh, and he’s one of my ult biases bc I admire the motivation he has and how passionate he is about everything he does. I love all his little habits and just how kind his heart it.

Jaemin (nct): where do I start tbh? when I got into nct, it was after my first lot of atar exams and I felt like crap,, but I couldn’t stop myself from laughing and smiling while watching jaemin joke around with the other members and make the others cringe with his aegyo. the love he has for his other members and how much he cares for them, yet he is still able to joke with them is something I can relate with in a way. he’s so talented and I just love how dedicated he is to everything he does.

Joshua (seventeen): only became my ult this year tbh, but oh my gosh it happened so quickly. his voice drew me in tbh,, like I don’t know how to explain it, but it’s like honey (???). tbh,, i could listen to him sing and play guitar all day. he’s just so kind and caring, but is also very warm as a person and it’s seen in interactions with the other members. i love his personality tbh, which is a reason why he became one of my ults so quickly. also, i love hearing him laugh, especially when I’ve had a crap day, it just puts a smile on my face. also, he’s funny as hell tbh and I won’t take no for an answer

Yehana (pristin): underrated as hell I swear,, but she’s so so talented. she has an amazing voice and I love watching her dance tbh. i miss her so much and I really hope we get to hear from her soon or pledis releases something, because she’s so talented and she deserves the world honestly. i just want the best for our sunshine 🥺

6. Who is the funniest idol in your opinion?

there are a lot, but Jackson from got7 comes to mind. all of got7 does tbh, like they’re just so funny. jackson is just very outgoing and i love his sense of humour tbh.

24. What idol do you think you have the most in common with?

this is hard tbh,, and I’ve spent most of the day thinking about it, but I’m not sure actually. I’m shy and awkward and introverted when people first meet me, but become very loud and such when I become comfortable, and I feel like a few idols fit that. tbh, I’m just not very sure. in the past, the most I’ve thought about this are those I share a birthday with, which is jennie, seungkwan and sungjin, but not much from that.

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bee-kathony · 6 years ago

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FOUR YEARS - YEAR TWO | “August 18th, 2015″

August 18th, 2015

I thought that the honeymoon phase would last longer than it did.

Jamie and I had only been married a little more than two months, it’d been a year since I was tumor free and I was looking forward to going back to work twice a week next month.

If only we hadn’t gone out to lunch to celebrate my tumor free brain. If only… if only…

++++++

“What do you want to eat, Sassenach? Yer choice,” Jamie smiled as we walked out to the car. It was a beautiful day, and the first time this month that Jamie had spare time away from work to celebrate my diagnosis of being tumor free.

“Hmmm, how about that little place on Home Street? With the really good pancakes!” Licking my lips in anticipation, I got in the passenger seat.

“The cafe that ye stuffed yer face at?” Jamie laughed, starting the car and headed in the direction of Cafe Class.

“I did not stuff my face!” I gasped, eyes wide. “The blueberry syrup was delicious yes, but I did not stuff my face, I ate them in a graceful way.” Jamie laughed, his eyes crinkling like they always did when he was really happy.

“I’m so happy, Sassenach… to be here wi’ ye,” he said a moment later, his left hand sliding over my knee. I brushed my finger over his ring, feeling the cool metal against my skin, blushing when I remembered our recent nuptials.

“I’m very happy too, Jamie.” I placed a kiss on the back of his hand and his lips curved softly. I would never tire of seeing him smile.

We got to the cafe and thankfully it wasn't busy, so we took the table nearest the window, looking out at the street. People watching was one of my favorite things to do — imagining their lives, the little details that make up a person. I was doing just this while I waited for our pancakes to arrive — Jamie had stepped outside to take a work phone call, mouthing “sorry” as he walked out the door.

I was looking at a woman coming down the street, noticing how cute her jacket and shoes were, wondering where she got them from, when she stopped suddenly in front of Jamie. She pulled her sunglasses off, resting them on top of her head, short curly hair much like mine. My heart squeezed as Jamie saw her, muttered something into his phone, hung up and gave her a hug. A familiar, yet tense hug.

My eyes were focused on them, unable to tear away my gaze until Jamie turned towards the window, pointing at me and I blushed, trying to make it look like I hadn’t just been gawking. Then my palms started to sweat as they both came through the door of the cafe — Jamie, kind as ever, holding the door open for her.

I stayed seated, legs crossed, my left hand with my wedding ring resting on the top of the table. Jamie looked at me, his eyes wide and his ears pink. Christ… who was this woman to him?

I didn’t have to wait long to find out.

“Hi, I’m Gia.” She stuck her small hand out and I shook it. My eyes shifted from her face to Jamie’s and I saw him shrug, as if his shirt were too tight. “You’re Claire, right?”

“Yes,” I found my voice. “Jamie’s wife.” I thought I saw her flinch slightly at the word ‘wife’ but I could have been making things up.

“Aye, Claire and I just got married in June!” Jamie chimed in. About time lad.

Gia smiled, resting her hand on the back of Jamie’s arm, “Oh that’s great! Congratulations you two.” I wanted to yank her hand off of my husband’s arm, but I also didn’t want to cause a scene. The next words out of her mouth caught me so off guard, I knew if I had been standing, I would have fainted.

“Hope your wedding went a lot better than ours did!” Gia laughed awkwardly, looking up at Jamie, but his eyes were fixed on me… gauging my reaction.

I sat still, vision blurring, and in that moment, I heard my heart break. It was a small, clean sound, like the snapping of a flower's stem.

“It went just fine, thank you,” I replied shortly, crossed my arms over my chest, and bit the inside of my cheek to stop the tears that would inevitably come. Jamie was married before? To this woman?

A million thoughts raced through my head, and I was too busy staring at my fingers in my lap to notice that Gia had left and Jamie was now standing in front of me.

“Sassenach… we need to talk.”

“Fuck you,” I said quietly for the sake of the people around us and stood up, brushing past him and nearly ran out the door, in a hurry to escape the nightmare that had become my life.

++++++

Jamie found me sometime later, sitting on the same park bench that we had shared our first kiss at. Why had I bloody come here of all places?

Tears threatened to spill down my cheeks when I saw the tips of his shoes approach. He stood there, waiting for me to say something, but I didn’t have any words for him — no words at least, that would do any good.

“Claire,” he took a step forward, his hand reaching under my chin, but I pushed it away, my stomach in knots at the feeling of his skin on mine. Only two months ago, we had promised to love one another, to not keep secrets, and to not tell lies.

This was a secret I didn’t understand and I wasn’t sure I would ever be able to get over.

“Claire, please,” his voice wavered and I finally looked up to see his eyes red, full of tears of his own. “Talk to me.”

“What do you want me to say?” I felt weak, as if every emotion I had ever felt in my life had been sucked out of me — a hollow shell.

“Somethin’, anythin’… please tell me what’s goin’ on in that wee head of yers.” Jamie bent his legs, and fell forward onto his knees to the grass, his hand hovering to touch my knee, but he pulled back when he saw my expression.

“You were m-married?” I stuttered on the last word. “For how long?”

Jamie took a deep breath and laughed. Laughed! If we weren’t in a public place, I would have hit him against his chest, clawed at his skin, anything to make him hurt as he had hurt me by keeping this from me.

“No, Sassenach. I wasna married to Gia, but we were engaged,” he sighed and rose to his feet, his fingers tapping against his thigh. I focused on his ring finger, trying to remember the vows he had made me, trying to remember the shit we had been through… anything that would help me to keep loving him. In this moment I very much wanted to hate him.

“Then why did she say wedding as if it happened?”

“Because…” he took a deep breath and muttered something in gaelic. “Because I left her at the altar.”

I finally looked up at him, “What? Jamie… how could you do that to her? Why?”

Taking it as a good sign that I had made eye contact with him, Jamie came and took a seat next to me on the bench, still a good safe distance away however.

“I ken it sounds bad, and I’m no proud of what I did. I’ll never forgive myself for it, but damn it, Sassenach… I dinna regret it!” Jamie grabbed my hand, shaking it slightly in his. “If I had never left the church that day, then I wouldna have met you.”

I pulled back my hand firmly, squeezing it in my lap. “All this time though Jamie. Not just you… but your family, Jenny and Murtagh. Wait,” I paused, trying to do the math in my head. “When was this? Before or after the plane crash?”

“After.”

“Jamie… how long ago,” I didn’t want to know but I knew I needed to.

“I knew Gia from university, that’s where we met,” Jamie said and leaned back against the bench as he began to tell me everything. “After the plane crash, I wasna myself. Once I recovered from most of the damage, I went back to school, but ye ken that I wasna speakin’ to Jenny and barely Murtagh.”

I nodded, keeping my gaze transfixed on a butterfly on a flower nearby and Jamie continued.

“Gia…” he sighed, and I could see him running his hand through his hair, leaving it sticking up in places. “She is the complete opposite of ye, Claire. I knew from our first date that she wasna my type and that I was only seein’ her to try and get away from the pain. After my Da —“ his words got stuck in his throat, and silently, without looking at him, I slid my hand across the bench, offering this small gesture and he took it, squeezing lightly.

“Ye wouldn’t have liked who I was back then, Sassenach. I was bitter, and no a verra nice person. I ken I never shoulda proposed to her, but she kept talkin’ about weddin’s and well I didn’t see why not.”

I wanted to cry at the soft touch of Jamie’s fingers on the palm of my hand. The same touch I had felt hundreds of times before. The same strong hands that had helped me when I felt weak and couldn’t get out of bed.

“So you got all the way to the altar and then decided that was the best time to break it off?” I spat out, maybe a bit too harshly and I felt Jamie’s fingers pause on mine before continuing to trace patterns on my skin.

“Aye. I did. I was a coward, Claire.” Jamie slid towards me on the bench, bringing my hand into his lap. I was too numb to move, to do anything but sit there and listen. “I met Gia five months after the plane crash, I was only nineteen and by my twentieth birthday, we had plans to be marrit. She hasna even met Jenny or Murtagh, mo ghraidh, that’s why they never said anything.”

“So they don’t know about her either, Jamie?” I looked at him, more tears welling in my eyes. Who was this man that I had married…

His eyes were wide, sensing my doubt in him. “Christ, of course they know! I told them the day after I left Gia. I wasna willin’ to make amends wi’ them yet, but I needed them to know.”

“Did Jenny yell at you?” I attempted a laugh, imagining what the fearsome Jenny Murray would think about all of this.

“No. She only said she was sorry she couldna be there for me. The conversation wasna a long one, Claire.” He pulled my hand to rest over his heart and I looked at him, biting my bottom lip. “I’m so sorry.”

“After everything we’ve been through Jamie… I just don’t understand why you never told me.” A single tear slid down my cheek and I felt it drop onto my lap, wetting my jeans.

“There’s no good reason why I didna, Sassenach,” Jamie bent his head. “I am a coward, that’s all there is to it.”

“I went through having a bloody fucking brain tumor and you don’t think the fact that you had almost been married to another woman was important to tell me? Yes, Jamie… you’re a coward.” I pulled my hand away and stood from the bench.

“And to think,” I looked him in the eye. “We were so excited about getting on the adoption list,” I scoffed. “I wouldn’t dream of bringing a child into this… this web of lies!” Turning to leave, I prayed that Jamie wouldn’t follow me, but a larger part of me, the weaker part of me, wanted him to run after me and hold me in his arms, begging me to forgive him.

I made it all the way back to the car in front of the cafe, and with no sign of Jamie, I climbed in and headed home, my heart in pieces.

++++++

August 18th, 2015

5:08pm

I walked around for hours after Claire had left me at the park. The moment she called me a coward, her eyes no longer holding that spark I had come to love, I knew… she would never forgive me for this.

Or at least not easily.

Checking my phone every ten minutes, with no new messages from Claire, I steadied myself and started walking in the direction of our house. There was more she needed to know, and I hoped she would hear me out.

The water was on in the bathroom, most likely Claire runnin’ herself a bath. I didn’t want her to be shocked at my arrival home, so I slammed the door a little louder than normal and waited in the doorway until I heard the sound of the faucet creak and stop.

I walked down the hallway, past pictures of our life together. We’d only known each other for twenty months, but already those twenty months were the best of my life — no matter the hardships we had endured early on. Claire wasn’t in the bedroom, but I saw the bathroom door cracked open, steam drifting out.

“Sassenach, are ye in there?”

“Go away, Jamie. I can’t do this right now.” She didn’t sound like herself, not like my Sorcha.

“Please, ye dinna even need to come out of the bathroom, Claire. I just need to say somethin’ and then I’ll go and stay wi’ Jenny and Ian tonight.” I waited for her and let out a sigh of relief when she opened the bathroom door, padded across the room and took a seat on the bed.

“Go ahead, then.”

“I thought of tellin’ ye, Claire.” I walked over to her, sitting on my knees in front of her, ready to beg for her forgiveness. “I did. I almost told ye once, but then ye got diagnosed wi’ yer tumor and things happened so quickly after that.”

“You’re using my tumor as an excuse for your cowardice?” She rolled her eyes, biting her lip.

“No! Christ, no I’m not. It’s just that I didna want to cause ye more pain. Claire… be honest wi’ me, would ye have wanted me to tell ye about this when ye were ill?”

She took a deep breath, folding her robe tighter around her body. “No. But, I got better a year ago, Jamie. What about then?”

“I can’t give you a reasonable explanation other than as time went on, and the happier you became, I couldn’t dream of crushin’ ye, of hurtin’ ye,” my heart was racing, pounding out of my chest. I didn’t know what I would do if Claire couldn’t forgive me.

“I can try and understand that,” she looked down at me, her eyes and cheeks wet and it broke my heart to see her so. All I wanted was to hold her in my arms and promise to never hide anything from her ever again.

“Thank ye, Sassenach I —“

“I said try, Jamie. I didn’t say that I do or that I ever will.”

“Please, mo nighean, I’m a foolish man and I ken I��ve kept a secret from ye when we promised there would be no such thing between us.” I moved forward, gently resting my hand on her ankle. “But I didna marry her… I married you.”

Claire made a sound then that broke my heart completely. A sob like none I had ever heard from her, not even when she was in the most pain from her chemo. I looked up at her to see her shoulders shaking, tears freely flowing down her cheeks. I didn’t care if she tried to push me away, I rose to my feet and gathered her in my arms, sitting down on the bed and cradled her to my chest.

“Shhh,” I said through tears of my own. “I love you, mo cridhe, it’s you I chose and it’s ye who I’ll choose everyday.”

She buried her head into my neck, body still trembling.

“Claire, we’ve been through so much to let this come between us, I’m beggin’ ye lass,” I cried, my voice shaking. “Please forgive me for a mistake I made when I was an idiot. Christ —“

Her hand came to cup my face, and I weeped at the feel of her touch. “I dinna deserve ye, Claire.”

“No,” she whispered. “You don’t.” Her arms came around my neck then and I rose from the edge of the bed and laid her down, and then curled my body around hers. “Just hold me, Jamie. We’ll work this out tomorrow, but for now… just don’t let me go.”

That night, I cried until I had no more tears left to give and held her in my arms, thanking God that she hadn’t cursed my name and sent me out to the streets. Hours later, a small wet nose tickled the back of my neck and Annie, the furry wee beast crawled over my body to lay next to Claire, resting her head against her. Animals are loyal creatures… humans — they are flawed, and broken creatures.

#four years #august 18 2015 #jamie x claire #outlander fanfiction #mclairefras #jamie fraser #claire fraser

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fuckyeahkagepro · 6 years ago

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CONCLUSIONS re: Kagepro Ages issue + Hibi+Hiyo’s Ages

- in 2012 (May) Konoha’s State of the World TV screens Hibiya Amamiya was “11″: (ALONG WITH) Hiyori, who canonically has ALWAYS had the “March” birthday, as soon as she was introduced with a birthday alongside Hibiya. which would place her on the YOUNGER END of their shared school year going by the Japanese school system* * THE JAPANESE SCHOOL SYSTEM * BEGINS IN APRIL (APRIL 1ST-2ND) * AND ENDS IN LATE MARCH. * HIYORI’S BIRTHDAY IS MARCH 3RD, * EARLY MARCH. * I.E. BEFORE THE SCHOOL YEAR FINISHES. order of Japanese school year w/this all in mind: April - Japanese school year begins -> August 14th-15th - main series canon happens -> November 4th - Hibiya’s birthday / he ages to 12 -> New Years - happens, YEAR CHANGES TO THE NEXT YEAR -> February 14th - Momo’s birthday / she ages chronologically to 16 from 15 -> March 3rd - Hiyori’s birthday / she ages (FINALLY) to 12 -> end of March - school year ends. ->

^ THAT IS VERY CLEARLY AN “11″ THANK YOU VERY MUCH. THIS IS SEEN AROUND 5 TIMES IN THE PV ON MULTIPLE SCREENS. * BOTH HIBIYA AND HIYORI GET THIS “11″. * IT IS CONFLICTING FOR HIYORI BECAUSE OF HER MARCH BIRTHDAY. * IT IS CHRONOLOGICALLY CORRECT FOR HIBIYA. - Hibiya says he is studying for Junior high school exams in “Talkers”, which would imply he’s entering Junior high the next year. - the grade before he’d enter Junior high implied is ‘6′th (ages 11~12*) - * real-world based setting. - this is the grade they’re in DURING MAIN CANON (6th). - 7th is the grade they enter POST-MAIN CANON, THE NEXT YEAR. - a Japanese 6th grader is equivalent to a US 1st-year middle schooler. - by the time they’re in 7th they’re 2nd-year middle schoolers. Talkers chapter 3 w/Hibiya and Ene: Hibiya: I-It’s not a misunderstanding! I really am thinking of taking the admission exam of a [Junior high] school from Tokyo and I’m getting ready for it! (later on): Hibiya: Well, about that… I gotta begin studying for the [Junior high] school admission exam (later on): Hibiya: Hn, looks like it… They (Hibiya’s parents) said, “if you want to take the [Junior high] school exam, try solving this mystery”. (later on): Ene: With this, they will allow you to take the exam! Hibiya: Yeah! Talkers chapter 9 later has:

Hibiya: Yeah… The new semester started and I met up with Hiyori at school.

”the entrance exam season is when students take intense and difficult examinations to CONTINUE ON to the higher school of their choice ” ”schools throughout the country will hold their examinations over a short period from late January through late February”* * this would be post-August 15th loops. * by then Hibiya would have ALREADY AGED REGARDLESS (from “11″ to “12″ on the first November 4th that occurs post-August 15th.) - in 2013 (January) Kagerou Daze Visual fanbook he was “(about ? ) 10″. This was WAYYYYYY back in JANUARY 2013, and Hiyori was displayed with THE SAME, ALSO but HIBIYA CANNOT BE 10 IF HIYORI IS. because then that screws up BOTH of their ages, and especially HIYORI’S, ALONG WITH HER GRADE: 2013:

^ BTW KONOHA WAS STILL “?” HERE IN AGE TOO + DISPLAYED AS “HARUKA KOKONOSE”

^ THOSE SURE ARE QUESTION MARKS

^ 2016 “Perfect Guide” REUSES the 2013 profiles. MY SCAN. ”age” is the first line under Hiyori’s picture with the “10″ “?”. So unfortunately, they are NOT up to date, BUT it means their AGES AREN’T IN THESE PROFILES either. NOTE THE QUESTION MARK. @ayara-resara confirmed to me it means/implies “ about ? ” BASICALLY. it would make HIYORI CHRONOLOGICALLY YOUNGER,

IF THEY WERE THE SAME “10″ AGE AT START, NOT HIBIYA. AND WE KNOW FOR A FACT HIYORI IS NOT “ 9 ″. BECAUSE OF THE KONOHA’S STATE OF THE WORLD TV SCREENS IN WHICH BOTH WERE ”11″ - in the Summer 2012 Children Record booklet they had NO AGES SEEN: ONLY STILL THE BIRTHDAYS (CIRCLED, IN RED):

^ DO NOT USE THIS BOOKLET FOR YOUR AGES REFERENCES. THERE WERE NO AGES IN THIS BOOKLET, ONLY BIRTHDAYS. - in - in a daze - novel Hibiya says he’s been living in his “small town” for: - “OVER 10 YEARS” + - “ten-PLUS” years “of life” ^ PUBLISHED MAY 2012 IN JAPAN. ” I’ve been stuck in this tiny village for over 10 years ”. ” And my short, 10+ (TEN-PLUS) years of life will be a lackluster thing that I won’t be able to remember, too. ” - in 2014 (July, MCA fandom era) PASH! article he was back at “11″. (Hiyori was listed in his same profile box in relation to him.)

^ THAT IS VERY MUCH AN “11″ THANK YOU.

- These were also the ages RE-USED in the official MCA script according to Japanese translator Zushilove , who is also Japanese / living in Japan and speaks it fluently. THOUGH SHE DID NOT SPECIFY HIBIYAS, SHE DID CONFIRM PRETTY MUCH EVERYONE ELSE’S WERE THE SAME CONFLICTING ONES DISPLAYED IN PASH 2014. - July PASH! also reconfirmed Kano’s “17″ age. - official merch from ONLY 3 years ago ALSO RECONFIRMED Kano’s “17″. - Fuyuyuu’s post’s timestamp here is May 17, 2015. (2015 !!!) - this would imply Zushilove was, as always (AND AGAIN), CORRECT. - we still have NO IDEA, HOWEVER, what age HIBIYA was displayed with at the 2014 MCA Japan-only event that Zushilove described

“ Same as Kano and Seto, Kido is one grade below Ayano/Shintaro. So for the current time setting,* * August 14-15th she’s [Kido’s] at an age to turn 16~17 between April 1 to next year’s March 31. Kido’s birthday is in January 2. Her [Kido’s] official age is “17″ (this age was written in the script of MCA as well) but her actual age is supposed to be 16. It’s even canon that Kido is younger than Kano (May 10th), who is in the same grade as her and also has the official age written as 17… ” “ Yeah….so from these facts, personally what I believe [*Zushilove’s opinion]

is that all of the character’s ‘official age’ is written as the age that they’re going to turn into until next year’s March 31, in order to differentiate each character’s school grade to show their age gaps.

For an example, if the staffs wrote the ‘actual age’ for Kano as 17 and Kido/Seto as 16, they may have thought that the fans will misinterpret that “Kido/Seto is one grade below Kano”……

...because there is this one thing I heard from one of the MCA staffs considering this complicated age setting but yeah I can’t really share that here…. “

“ Basically, there is this contradicting ‘offcial age’ thing going on for the characters who have their birthday between August 16 and March 31 “

- Zushilove’s commentary, a year or so ago. * HIBIYA’S BIRTHDAY (NOVEMBER) IS BEWTEEN AUGUST 16 AND MARCH 31ST. August 16 -> November 4th -> etc. (as described above) * HIYORI’S BIRTHDAY (MARCH 3RD) IS BEFORE MARCH 31ST AS WELL. - IT’S VERY POSSIBLE THIS IS WHERE HE /AND/ HIYORI COULD HAVE BEEN LISTED WITH “12″ AT START OF SERIES - AND WHY THAT AGE SPREAD AROUND ONLINE FOR SO LONG. - but even if it WASN’T - HIBIYA AGES TO 12 CHRONOLOGICALLY BY NOVEMBER 4TH ANYWAY - sooooo we COULD just recognize he’s 11~12 - this would place HIYORI at 10~11 chronologically OR, - YOU COULD LET HIYORI BE 11~12 TOO , - BECAUSE SHE IS IN THE SAME GRADE AS HIBIYA, - AND ALSO ENTERING JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL THE NEXT YEAR, - SINCE SHE, TOO, IS ALSO DISPLAYED WITH “11″ - ON “ KONOHA’S STATE OF THE WORLD ” TV SCREENS. - THESE TV SCREENS OF WHICH ARE ALSO STILL CLEARLY SEEN IN THE 2016 GUIDEBOOK IN THE PVs IMAGES SECTION.

- AND YES, THE SERIES TAKES PLACE IN JAPAN (FOR THE FINAL TIME)

ALSO THIS IS MOMO AS OF SIDU’S 2015 ARTBOOK TOO SO:

COMPARE TO KANO WHO HAS HIS “17″ IN 2015 HERE:

^ NOTE THE “17″ ABOVE HIS HEAD

(HOW MANY MORE “17″S DO YOU NEED HONESTLY)

BONUS:

^ NON-CANON WANNYANPUU PV.

STILL-CANON LYRICS. “DECADE S ”. MAKE OF IT WHAT YOU WILL

DO NOT MAKE ME BUY ANOTHER BOOK TO COMPARE OH MY GOD

ALSO IF YOU COULD PLEASE

LET HIYORI LIKE GIRLS AGAIN AND LET HIBIYA LIKE BOYS AGAIN AND LET BOTH LIKE GIRLS AND/OR BOYS AGAIN I’D BE VERY HAPPY AFTER ALL OF THIS BUT WELL Y’KNOW

I FORGOT TO ADD BUT JIN CONFIRMED IN “FUTURE EDITION” SHINTARO WOULD BE AROUND JIN’S AGE WHICH IS 28 WHICH WOULD IMPLY AROUND 10 YEARS LATER WHICH WOULD PUT HIBI+HIYO AT AROUND 20 OK THANK YOU ADULT KIDO WAS CONFIRMED FOR AROUND 25 TOO SO YEAH

#kagepro #hibiya amamiya #hiyori asahina #hibihiyo #hibimomo #konohibi #kagepro: conflicting ages #kagepro: timeline issues #kagepro: ages #kagepro: ages inconsistencies #hibiyas age #hiyoris age #hibiya refs #hiyori refs #hibiya profiles #hiyori profiles #konoha profiles #momos age #(TAGGING RELEVANT TAGS)#(I'M DONE)#(I'M VERY DONE)#(I'M SO DONE DO NOT MAKE ME BUY ANOTHER BOOK)#(THIS SHOULD BE MORE THAN ENOUGH FOR YOU OH MY GOD)#(PLS LET ME LIVE)#(THE 'JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL' SHOULD HAVE BEEN MORE THAN ENOUGH CONFIRMATION ON ITS OWN)#(CAN WE PLEASE ACKNOWLEDGE THE ACTUAL TIMELINE NOW SO WE CAN UNDERSTAND THIS SERIES PROPERLY)#(..... LET THEM BE LGBTQIA+ BY THE WAY)#(ME LOOKING AT HOW HIYO LOOKS AT MOMO 'JUST GALS BEING PALS')#(ME LOOKING AT HOW KONOHA WANTS HIBIYA TO ACKNOWLEDGE HIM 'JUST BROS BEING BROS')#(ME SEEING HIYORI SAY 'I LOVE YOU' IN SUMMERTIME RELOAD 'JUST-----')

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sunnysynthsunshine · 6 years ago

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Rik’s birthday

In the fluffy bright clouds, there was a house, it wasn’t specifically in heaven or hell, but still after worldly and magical...

He had short grey hair, eyes as blue as sapphires as he smiled prancing about his lounge, decorating his place for today was a special day

He held up balloons, he set the table with treats, he set up a Spotify playlist of mainly ABBA, Little Richard and Madness

glugging down his wine bottle as he waited for each invited guest

He had on a decorative dressing gown trying to look his best

Hearts were popping up all around from his land and from his twitter mentions from the people from earth who were underground

He wrote some nice messages sending them to his loved ones, the world was talking about him again it was like he never left in the first place

Soon the place was quite busy, not packed but some people were there, nibbling sponge cake slices, dancing to his music choices, this was a night to remember, quite the fun party….it was his 61st birthday.

But it was also quite bittersweet, he was up here and they were down there, while he liked some of his afterlife buds a lot of the people he loved were on earth,he couldn’t reverse what had happened outside of alternate dimensional possibilities, thinking back while it was nice to feel eclectic,he kinda did things too quick ,all the years of him being a daredevil resulted in him not being very well.

He couldn’t reach past his sixties,Times were nice, when he was alive, he had his mates, his family, his dog he had a lot of the things that made him happy.

But here he was often alone, while he’d have the odd dander through the otherworldy neighbourhood and get the odd visitor astrally projecting themselves through the *realms*

To visit him in a dream, he was by himself a lot of the time.

He was alone at home sometimes when his wife and his kids weren’t around, but this time he was really just by himself

He couldn’t cook so he had to learn, he knew Ade was good at cooking, so he figured how to use other appliances besides a microwave, Heaven didn’t allow smoking so his place ended up being in the middle between those two realms.

He felt like the doctor being able to shapeshift from his old self to his younger days, but it didn’t take his sadness away.

He drank and drank, opening his gifts of chocolate boxes, figurines, books and vinyl records and partied the night away, visiting people, dancing about and trying to enjoy his amazing day.

When the sun rose, it was the next day, he clicked on his phone and scrolled away, he could see post upon posts mentioning his name and legacy, but it was also International Women’s day, he looked on Instagram and one of his daughters, Rose, had made a post about that occasion involving her, her sister Bonnie, her friends and her mum Barbara.

And the main photo on her insta page was one that brought back memories, it was from the 90s, when she, Bonnie and Sid were little kids then and there he was with them in the back garden with Barbara, just a cheerful family.

He sobbed for a bit holding his phone closely, he started to feel less lonely

He was living beyond the galaxies

But he was still Rosie, Sid and Bonnie’s daddy

He was Barbara’s husband

He was Ade’s best mate, well one of his best mates

Later on, Pete Richens stopped by as he had missed the party,Rik realised he had some cake slices left and they shared the cake, he was reminded of how many people missed him, but when he’d think of them he’d project a cheerful grin

They might not be able to physically see him but he was going to make sure that all the people he loved and cared for would know that he still loves them.

He closed his eyes and activated his astral projection, he shapeshifted as through the universe he drifted

He reappeared, his regular self, his angel self, his young self, all of the versions of him, the more he was mentioned, the more powerful his astral teleportation got

His spiritual clones were everywhere, on social media, in the minds of people who viewed him in a more philosophical way, in the minds of his fans and in the minds of his loved ones.

Before March 7th, not much was going on, the world was still the cynical fishbowl it always was, some good stuff happened, some bad stuff happened, not much different than any other day until March 7th.

It was like that drop dead Fred character he played, he was teleporting like he was jumping out of a jack-in-the-box, he was talking to the people he loved, he was hugging them, giving them digital spiritual autographs,he was giving them advice, reenacting quotes from his shows, he invited some of them to his afterparty, he re-ignited a strong feeling of cheer

being a Jesus-like figure to the world to those who saw him that way but generally, he was still the cheerful, kind, sarcastic but considerate bloke he always was...even if he was now the age of a grandpa and had been dead for the past 5 years….but I’m sure he’s having fun up there and he’s probably thinking of us down here, from his loyal fans to those he held dear

We miss you

Rik Mayall

But we’ll never forget you

Love is the answer

Your still with us even if your physical form has past it’s final chapter.

#fanfic #lucid dreaming #astral projection #rik mayall #rik mayall day #rik mayall birthday

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crispsevans · 6 years ago

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2018 in review.

Here’s my year in review. It’s been a tough one. I know, you shouldn’t blame a system that mankind came up with to keep track on time for all of this, but it just happened to happen in 2018.

January: My year started off in Rotterdam, The Netherlands, where my former roommate and I went to for New Year’s last year. When we came back home a lot of not so nice surprises waited for me which led to a mental breakdown in...

February: Probably one of the worst months of my 2018. I spent hours and days of locking myself up and cry and feeling empty, just like I did all those years ago. I knew it was time for a change and since we had to move out of our flat anyway, I took a step back and instead of looking for a new place for myself, I made the decision to go back home to get healthy again. I looked for an open therapy spot and arranged everything to go back home to my dad’s house.

March: Saying goodbye to Cologne wasn’t very easy for me at all. Packing all my stuff, I realized I’d be leaving with way more stuff than what I have moved in with. I packed up 17 huge boxes and tons of bags and suitcases filled with my life and it took us three days to get everything back into my old hometown and into my old bedroom. Thanks to my boss at this point, because he was such a big help, really!

April: Back in my hometown, I felt relieved. So much pain was just gone in a snap and I felt so much better now that the weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I felt a lot more free than I have in the 7 months before and my anxiety slowed and stripped down, which was a nice change. But I kept being dumb and made some stupid mistakes which led to bad things in the following months.

May: Being a wedding photographer, I only took on very few weddings this year which meant financially I was basically ruined. I haven’t thought about this too much, but I thought I should take care of myself and my health first, since I overworked myself in 2017. Well, not my best idea, let me tell you. I should’ve worked a way out to stabilized both, my health and my finances. Instead, I didn’t and a huge mess was waiting for me by the end of the year. But for now, in May I had my very first wedding of the season and it was a very good and beautiful one. I won new friends and clients through this and in general that day was one of the happiest of my 2018. Shoutout to Patrick for sticking with me that day.

June: Shot my second wedding of the year in June and it was so interesting and also made friends again through it. Amazing, really. And then I went to London, the only place in the world that makes me feel home and secure and happy. I went there with two friends to actually see Ed Sheeran in Wembley. Hell, what a day that was. We stood like 6th row and it was phenomenal. Probably a day I’ll never forget - EVER. Also we were staying in this really nice AirBnb and the hosts name was also Kate which was very funny. On my last day in London, I had a few hours for myself and walked through the city as I always do. My feet brought me to the V&A, my happy place in my happy place. It’s a place where I can think and get my mind off all the bad things that surround me. I was getting inspired by paintings and pieces of fashion - I’ve seen it all a billion times but it keeps inspiring me every time. I was very sad when I picked up my suitcase and made my way to Heathrow to catch my flight.

July: Probably the month I have the least memories off, because barely anything happened. I just tried to survive with the growing feeling of emptiness and numbness. I probably annoyed all of my friends with my moodswings, I mean I even annoyed myself with it. Shot my third and originally my last wedding of the season and it was meh, but thanks Tascha for making it a great day anyway and we found this really good Italian restaurant near where I live - we need to go there again. Never thought Spaghetti Aglio e Olio can taste THIS GOOD.

August: Favourite month of the year and also my birthday month. August is not necessarily my favourite month because it is my birthday month, but it marks summer for me and I’m a summer person. To me, it has the most beautiful days of the year and I can’t get enough of it. I like the number 8 as well... so yeah. My August started with a visit to Vienna, where I saw a whole bunch of my friends who did their best to make me feel better (looking at ya @promisedmistake and @uneven-odds ), even though I had a moment, where I kinda fell apart, but I guess that happens. I cherish those days very much, because they were also a big part of the best days of my year. Spending the days by the pool, getting a sunburn, turning like really brown afterwards... having a birthday party for my friend we were all staying with... be reckless for some time, having tons of laughs with those great people, eating good food and some great pizza, drinking delicious drinks, watching “Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again” and just simply having a good time. When I headed back my anxiety hit me really hard again, because I actually left a letter to my father before i left saying many things about myself that are very true to the core but that I have never managed to tell him. He tried to talk to me about it, but then again anxiety hit me so hard that I ran away and we haven’t talked about it ever since. My birthday came up on August 14th and it was a pretty boring day. Didn’t really celebrate it at all, also was reminded on my real friends who really thought of me that day and how they treated me and wished me a happy birthday. It’s not necessarily the fact they remember your birthday, but to me it’s also the way someone wishes you a happy birthday that shows you how important you are to them. I also met one of my wedding couples from 2015 (or 2016???) again, because they were expecting a baby! AHHHH! We had always planned to see each other again but we never made it due to our busy schedules and then it finally worked. It was a beautiful summer evening and to be honest, I took many of my favourite images during that photoshoot. The rest of August was pretty calm, started to work in a the pub again more often and well...

September: A game changer month for me in many ways. It was so stressful but so inspiring and a good month for me with a few bad days in between, but that’s just the way life should be, right? I started September with working and then I actually flew to GREECE (yes GREEEEEECE!!!!!) to shoot my last wedding of the season. Okay, I was second shooting it but seriously - best wedding of my entire career. Not only because it was beautifully planned and decorated, but this wedding felt like a freaking friends wedding where I just happened to be. It didn’t feel like work for just one second. Everyone was so kind and so nice and caring, the food was incredible and the photographer girl I went with is probably one of my closer friends now, because we learned so much about each other in those 3 days, insane. What an experience. I also flew business class for the first time and I’m a bit sad that I’m so broke, because that experience was just AWESOME. Luckily, I didn’t have to pay for any of that. I got paid instead. What a dream. When I came back from Greece, everything felt like a dream, because I still couldn’t believe it. I went back working in the pub and then the event I had been waiting for the whole year took place - photokina. Seeing all my amazing colleagues in one place was a very good thing for me and something I needed so bad. Listening to very inspiring talks (Christian Anderl, WHAT A GUY) and seeing my one and only Nadia again was so refreshing and healthy for me, I don’t think these people know how good this was for me and how much I needed it. I spent three days straight on this fair and looked at new gear, tested out new lenses and listened to many inspiring people, as well as shopped some new stuff for my business. I also met some people again that I literally haven’t seen IN YEARS and that was also one of the best days I’ve spent this year. Seeing Lynn and Jan was really something that lit up my mood by a 1000. What else happened in September? I captured a christening by the end of the month, I went to see my favourite football club (YES FOOTBALL, NOT AMERICAN FOOTBALL OK) in the stadium and something happened I never thought would happen - my love for this one stupid person finally started to freaking FADE.

October: I don’t like October very much until the 8th, because the 7th is a very ... memorable day for me, where I always feel very bad. Coincidentally the two men I have shared the biggest love for in my life actually were born on this freaking day. Like there were only two.. AND BOTH OF THEM WERE BORN ON OCTOBER 7th ... two years apart from each other but seriously, PLEASE. So that day didn’t turn out to be very well, I spent it in bed and I tried to sleep through it as much as possible. October 9th marks a very life changing day for me, as on Oct 9th in 2006 my little brother was born. I was 12 years old back then and spent the day in an amusement park. I got the news when I came back home in the evening. This year, he turned 12 himself and it’s ridiculous how fast time flies, because I feel nothing like 24, I still feel the same like when I was 14 and yet I can see time run when I look at my brother. He eventually grew taller than me this year and his voice lowered down by an octave already. Like how is this happening. Other than that, October was a pretty boring month but it opened up the more or less catastrophe in my life that I created myself in April this year. Great.

November: Even though November isn’t far away time wise, I barely remember what happened in that month, because I actually just lived from day to day, trying to survive. It was a bad month, a really bad one. The only light in that month was probably that I went to see the Mamma Mia Musical.

December: Wow, I don’t even know where this month went. It was shorter than ever before. For the first time in years I actually made biscuits again, like german christmas biscuits. I tried to bring up the christmas mood, but well. Didn’t really work out that much. I ordered a new phone, because my old one is actually dying. And I started to go to the cinema more often again. A real plus side. My anxiety level is probably around 90 of 100 and I am scared of what 2019 holds up for me - like literally. But my number one favourite memory of December and probably also of 2019 is seeing my best friend again after two years. We rarely talk, but she is still my best friend, because I know she’s there when I need her - always.

So in general, I had some pretty good memories this year. I went to see a lot of movies in the cinema, I made some new friends, I went to Greece for a wedding, I lost my love for photography at some point and gained it back at another one, I had a ton of bad days this year, so many that I just stopped to count them and it all felt like a huge blurry mess.

Thank you 2018 for teaching me and showing me the life I don’t want to have, but I am not strong enough yet to change.

Just keep swimming.

#about me #2018 in review

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