#did this fast im working on my other monstrosity

[sugurusladyknightt]

what i'm thinking of right now is what if someone tried hitting on you out while out on a date with your love.

satoru would've stepped away to grab the ice cream that had you waiting in a line for what you thought would feel like forever. it was fun though, the two of you pausing your initial conversation about the days plans in favour of people watching and listening in on the very scandalous conversations of those who stood with you in line. your eyes meeting in shock or surprise every so often, doing your best to disguise your laughs and gasps with charades of idle conversation and your own scandalous conversations referencing drama that, mind you doesn't really exist in your lives at the moment.

while he was a way your getting hit on by some creep. it didn't come off that way initially, but man was this getting uncomfortable fast. can this guy not take a hint? he's asking for your number once again and your refusing once again politely at first, and more stern as the advances keep coming. your not used to people that won't listen when you speak. since when did back off mean come closer? since when did i'm not interested become im just playing coy. since when did im taken, leave me alone translate to my relationship isn't real or isn't important to me and id throw it away for someone who doesn't understand basic boundaries and uses those suffocating, nauseating colognes?

drawing closer and closer to you. face far too close to yours, breathe stank too. yuck. he's gaining confidence now,convinced the 'boyfriend' you were talking about was an excuse you'd made up. your just nervous is all. playing hard to get.

panic starts to set into your bones. he's leaning back, all cocky now.

come on doll face, this 'boyfriend' of yours doesn't have to know. quit playing so high and mighty i know you want me.

you think you might throw up. when an ice cream cone hits him right in the centre of his face. comically sliding down his face. and satoru enters the scene. sun creating a halo around his fluffy white hair, your ho is glowing. signature classes sat pretty low on his nose his skin a little flushed from the heat (hence the ice cream) he's holding two more cones in his hands, walking towards you and and the offender, mock sympathy in his voice. as he expresses apologies that to just might seem sincere if your that stupid if you tried hard enough. grabbing the cone of his face to meet his eyes.

satoru has a incredibly towering stature, and while this wasn't news to you, it's quite impressive to see its advantages in real time.

peaking down at the face behind the sweet creamy mess, satoru recoils. "ew." his tone dripping with absolute disgust. turning around to make his "bleghh" face as he presses the now ice cream less cone into the man's hair. like a sad party hat above his head an sticks on of the other two, being careful to use the flavour he knows you like least, straight back into his face. massaging it around to cover as much of the monstrosity as possible before nodding proudly for his work. a pat on the make, and he's turing on his heel towards you with that blinding smile on his face.

dramatically, satoru drapes his hands over you shoulders, and leans his weight it, a pout on his strawberry glosses lips. "babyyyyy, the sight will haunt my night mares, scary people out there" he tuts standing straight with a satirical furrow between his brows. he should have been a theatre kid with all these dramatics. though you were greatful, and relived. he makes life feel so easy. it's contagious.

he looks down at you through his sunglasses small smile playing on his lips, face no longer contorted by an expression of discomfort or disgust.

satoru hands you the last cone. after all the two he got for him have served greater purpose than satisfying his sweet tooth. strong arm loosely hangs from you shoulder as you walk off leaving behind the cheap excuse of a man now covered in creamy deliciousness far too good him. your laughing at something satoru said as he glances back to see yhe newest addition to his hit list muttering to himself as he try's to get the ice cream of his over gelled greasy hair, fake designer top and horribly ugly face. satoru thinks he should just keep it as it was. ice cream was a far more pleasant sight. he looks back down at you eating away at your cone, there's a little caught at the corner of you lips.

smirking he leans down to lick it off, taking advantage of the angle of your head above his to make his eyes wide and pretty for you the same way he would when he was licking something else. your flustered, mouth open, paused mid sentence and your eyes wider than his now. wide eyes portraying his faux innocence drop to a sultry lidded gaze leaning in to kiss away another but in the other side. your fingers going up to feel if there's anything there on instinct.

he stands up quick, back to his regular self, pinching your check acting as if nothing had just transpired. like the subtle innuendo was felt only by you. "are you blushing?? god baby your such a pervert. is that all i am to you???"

and he's back to the dramatics. rolling your eyes your shrug him of and continue. he stays, watching you, his beloved walk ahead, he feels himself let out the dreamy exhale of a lovesick fool, he'll be the first to admit that for you, he is nothing else.

a quick jog is all it takes to catch up to you. arm coming back around your shoulder he leans in like he weighs the same as the feather. burying himself close to you. you smelt sweeter than ice cream. his hair tickles your neck, and your his face.

"baby"

a hmm is all he gets in reply, to busy lapping away at your cone to pay attention to the kind sexy clown you call you boyfriend. he got your favourite flavour after all.

extravagant gestures weren't something satoru shied away from, as we have gotten to see up close today. he was loud and carefree but he was yours. and you his. walking side by side, his arm around your shoulders, head resting close to you. he can feel your pulse (his posture must've looked horribly uncomfortableto someone watching from outside the two of you). it's peaceful like this. despite the bustling crowds and busy chatter around you, you shared a feeling of peace in that moment. body held close to the one you loved, despite the heat your far from bothered by the proximity. he smells so good.

then it hits him. no sweet treat :( the gravity of the situation makes it self clear to him, but his salvation, as always, is being held delicately in your hands.

"you wouldn't mind sharing with your brave, fearless, super funny, super hot, saviour knight now would do you baby"

[guccigarantine]

listening to palisade 22 again and trying to visualize what Cori’s new mech looks like. I was looking at paramerion sabers and they have such a cool curve to them I wanted to try and put that in the leg/foot situation. I also like the idea of an inverted crown/halo situation but I think what I actually want to do is make it look more like how the halos on the Saint skeletons look. for my next pass I think I’m gonna try and make the wings look like the wings on the knife angel statue (you know the one) and add some decorations and gems and stuff :)

[breadandblankets]

Can you expand on your 60 Hz wiggles?

oh BOY CAN I

here is a question, most power in the world is generated via turbines, spun by some sort of moving fluid (air, steam, water, etc) but why?

if you have met a white dad or watched supernatural you may be familiar with AC/DC, which of course are two methods for transmitting electricity. The late 1800s had a lot of things going on, not least of which inventing my gender:

i was born in exactly the right generation to look like that and also suffer the effects of runaway consumer capital.

the 1880s and 90s had what was deemed the "war of the currents" with Edison, famous proponent of DC power, on one side and Westinghouse on the other. (Yes most people give the title to Tesla, who, while extremely instrumental in getting Westinghouse Electric off the ground: my ol pal George here should Not be slept on)

I could give you a run down of historical events here but well...

Why did AC win?

Simple, it was cheap.

The problem with DC is that it is really quite a pain to convert between voltages. Now when we convert between voltages we can use a DC-DC converter, a Buck-Boost converter is most common. They look something like this:

Now if you are anything like me and maybe you know a thing about a circuits you go "Hey Wait A Minute, that looks like a half-wave rectifier".

Yes imaginary person, that IS a half-wave rectifier because to make a Very complicated topic very short, this is a DC to AC to DC converter. (not really but also not Not okay).

This whole process requires a transistor, something that won't be invented until 1950. How did they convert DC power in 1880 you ask?

This monstrosity:

Yes, they powered a motor to turn a shaft to turn a generator to get power back out. For reference a modern DC motor is about 75-80% efficient and a generator is just a motor running in reverse so 75%X75%=56%.

Fifty-Six Percent Loss.

"Oh but can AC do better?" the snoody guy in the back asks.

Friends and Enemies, let me introduce you to the transformer:

*wild cheering*

Using the power of electro-magnetism, coming in at an efficiency of >90%, and best of all made from solid metal. The transformer genuinely revolutionized the way we create and send electrical power.

if you google "why do we use AC power" you will get some dumbass telling u about "skin effect" or whatever but im going to put my thesis down on the transformer being the reason we use AC for everything.

Here is a very simple diagram of the way our modern electrical grid is setup:

"There's math here, I'm scared!!" Take my hand, trust me, you are safe here.

Power is equal to energy over time, and energy must observe the law of conservation of energy (energy cannot be created nor destroyed yada yada yada). Therefore Power IN must equal Power Out.

Transformers cannot create energy, they simply change its form. Essentially a transformer is a device that transforms Voltage (how much electrical force is in the wire) into Current (how fast the electrons are moving in the wire). And because of the properties of electromagnetism, it only works on an alternating current (AC). (This is a whole other rant, if you want to know how transformers work the ask box is there)

More Voltage equals less friction (electrical friction is a whole other rant) in the wire means can make a smaller wire (wire size changes how much friction the wire has) with less burning the insulation means save money.

I got off track

Turbines.

If you've been here before, you know electricity=magnetism and vice versa. Magnets have Poles (like the earth has poles, North and South, due to the earth having a magnetic core).

Spinning a magnet over a coil of wire, makes the electrons do a lil dance, ie, they are pulled along by the magnetic field.

a single magnet rotating in a circle, create a sinusoidal wave over time

also, as it turns out, spinning something in a circle is a REALLY efficient way to turn mechanical motion into electrical energy. ask any mechanically inclined person we have one million ways to turn a shaft and have to come up with crazy ways to turn that motion into a linear (straight line) motion.

its just as hard to get a truly flat DC voltage, most of the time we just end up using an AC voltage we put through the press.

i don't think i answered a single one of the questions i set out to find, but you know what, i had fun and i Did in fact expand on those wiggles.

[keichanz]

Mistake

kay so i really don't care if some of this doesn't make sense because this is the first thing i've written in a while that i don't absolutely hate. well this version at least. ending up scraping the first draft because it just seemed wrong and went in a different direction. im glad i did cause im happy with it.

anyway i realize that this may not get much feedback because i took a different approach to it, aka the entire pov is from an OC but i can't bring myself to care too much because i wrote this purely for myself. got inspired, started writing, and i actually liked the content i was writing. end of.

btw the oc doesn't refer to inuyasha as a half-demon because he's unaware he is one and i was too lazy to delve into those waters anyhow.

also for the sake of this oneshot pls dont look too closely at the ranks of diplomat and ambassador. i was too lazy to put much research regarding positions of power so just...go with it.

inspired by @stillunderyourbed​'s art that can be found here.

It was…quaint. Smaller than what he'd expected. The housing structures looked subpar, there didn't appear to be any wooden walkways, and he could detect the distinct odor or fish in the air with hints of manure. There even seemed to be a perpetual dust cloud hovering at about waist high, thickening from the numerous carts, wagons, horses, and villagers kicking up dirt as they went about their daily lives. Already he felt like there was a layer of dust caked on the inside of his lungs and he wasn't even inside yet.

All in all, it was your typical countryside village, home to simple folk that made a living off of fishing, farming, and trade. The diplomat sneered in disgust. For being the rumored home of the creature strong enough to destroy the despicable Naraku, the village was…less than impressive. And to say that he was underwhelmed would be a vast understatement.

Shifting atop his mount, a chestnut gelding that had been his faithful companion for the last four years, Takeji frowned as he surveyed the sight before him. It was early afternoon, so men were out working in the fields, women were chatting amongst themselves as they laundered clothing at the river, and children were running about, playing and laughing while dogs barked at their heels. He could see the great red torii gate and the stone staircase that led to the shrine and he could hardly refrain from rolling his eyes.

The village was obviously poor, possibly even teetering on the edge of poverty, and instead of feeding themselves for a good long while, they decided to construct that monstrosity. He would never understand the minds of simple common folk. Daft. All of them.

Barely keeping himself from scowling, Takeji reluctantly climbed off his mount and forced himself to move forward into the pathetic excuse for a village. Already he knew he would have to burn his expensive attire; there would be no getting the dust and stench out of it after his ghastly visit. A visit he had not wanted to make, but being a highly revered and prestigious diplomat, it was his duty to travel to far off lands in hopes of establishing a profitable relationship that would ultimately benefit his homeland.

Although, looking around and fighting against the urge to retch at both the nauseating stench and the mere sight of all the unwashed villagers milling around, Takeji wondered not for the first time why he even bothered to accept this task. True, it was said the slayer of Naraku did hail from here, but surely having his homeland associated with this hovel would garner nothing but loss. So why had he agreed to come?

Oh, yes, he mused, grimacing as he stepped over a large manure pile right in the middle of the road. Because apparently, being all chummy with the nation's hero will allow us to have him at our beck and call, because who doesn't want a powerful demon capable of slaying the most evil demon in all of existence as an intimidating presence during negotiations, and let's not forget he alone would be equal to about one hundred soldiers in battle.

Rolling his eyes, Takeji tied his mount to a hitching post, withdrew his satchel with all the necessary paperwork, and set about finding this Inuyasha fellow. He'd been told the demon wore scarlet robes, carried a sword at his hip, and had white hair so no doubt he would stick out like a sore thumb amongst the droll browns and grays of the common folk, which suited him just fine. The sooner he was done, the sooner he could leave because there was no way he was staying even a second more in this village than he had to. Even if the next inn was hours away, he'd make the journey; the inn here was probably as unclean and riddled with bed bugs or something. Ugh. How vile.

Shrugging the satchel over his shoulder, Takeji bit back a groan, sighed, and hadn't even made it a single step before the sound of screaming froze him in his tracks. He gasped and immediately started looking for the danger, body tense, preparing to hop back onto his steed lightning fast and make a hasty getaway.

But as he looked around with wide eyes and a frantically beating heart, Takeji couldn't help but notice that he was the only one that appeared to have heard the sound of terror. The villagers were just continuing to go about their day, calm as you please, either severely deaf or completely uncaring. Takeji was beginning to wonder if he was perhaps hearing things when it happened again, a high-pitched sound that he realized with dread belonged to a child.

Takeji gaped. A child was in danger and nobody cared?! What kind of village was this?! Another shriek pierced the air, and Takeji made a decision. Very well; if these imbeciles weren't going to do anything about it, then he himself would see to the danger. While by no means a swordsman or warrior, he did have some weapons training he could fall back on for this precise reason. Traveling alone was dangerous, and you never knew what you would encounter.

Resolved, the diplomat set his jaw, unsheathed the dagger at his waist, and darted toward the direction the screams were coming from. He meandered between houses, hoped over lazing dogs, dodged startled villagers in his path, and he came into a small clearing by the forest's edge. The sight that greeted him was…not what he expected.

Coming up short, Takeji watched with a befuddled frown as one child chased around two other, slightly older looking children. One might think they were playing a game of sorts, and the diplomat started to believe that was indeed the case…until the one doing the chasing, clad in red, suddenly jumped high into the air, over the heads of the other two children, and landed before them with hands raised.

Hands, Takeji noticed with growing dread and disgust, tipped with claws on each finger and he quickly realized what exactly was happening. That wicked little demon brat, that creature was toying with those helpless children! It was keeping them trapped, preventing them from running away by leaping over their heads and blocking their route of escape! They screamed, the demon child laughed, and so potent was his fury, so enraged was he for the fact that the villagers apparently did not care about what was happening right beneath their noses, Takeji failed to notice the wide smiles on all three of the young one's faces. The blood pounding in his ears prevented him from hearing the gleeful giggles as the two human kids scrambled away from the one clad in red, and without another thought, Takeji moved.

"Run, children!" Takeji ordered as he hurled himself into the clearing, dagger raised as he charged toward the demon brat with a baleful glare. "I will take care of his filthy animal!"

All three children froze in place, eyes wide as Takeji inserted himself between the two human children - twin girls, he idly noted - and the demon spawn that dared raised its claws toward them. The brat stared up at him with big brown eyes and it - she - actually looked confused. Takeji scowled. He would not fall for such a ploy.

"I will not allow you to harm them," he spat and pointed his dagger at her. The child blinked at him and then looked behind him at the two girls who still had not taken the chance to flee. In shock, perhaps? Stunned? No matter; they were safe, so long as he stood between them and the threat.

The demon child made a face and started to walk around him, completely disregarding the weapon trained on her, but Takeji shifted and stopped her once more. He heard the two behind him whispering as the spawn looked up at him once again, this time frowning at him with narrowed eyes. And was that a growl he heard? He snorted. Was she actually trying to appear threatening? Pathetic.

Scowling, Takeji lifted a foot, placed it on her stomach, and shoved. The demon gasped as she stumbled back and then landed on her behind with a small grunt. He heard a gasp from behind him, urgent whispering, and then hurried scrambling. A glance over his shoulder told him they'd finally gotten wise and ran away. He nodded. Good. Now he could deal with this vermin without innocent eyes to bear witness.

But as he stared down at the pathetic sight before him, Takeji wondered maybe if such measures would even be necessary. The beast was still lying where she had fallen and was staring up at him with wide eyes brimming with…wait. What? Were those tears? Oh, you have got to be joking.

Rolling his eyes, the diplomat scoffed at the pathetic play for mercy and careless waved his dagger at her. The child actually flinched and followed the blade with her gaze, wariness clear in her eyes. Well. It appeared her self-preservation instincts have finally kicked in.

"Cease your theatrics," Takeji drawled, unimpressed. "They do not fool me. Now lucky for you, demon spawn, the pathetic sight you project has made me decide to spare your life. Your tainted blood is not worthy enough to soil my blade, so I will say this only one and you would do well to heed this warning, beast."

Hardening his stare and curling his lip into a sneer, Takeji spat, "Leave this place at once and do not return. There is no place for the likes of you, an abomination that preys on helpless children. Now get out of my sight, afore I kill you on principle. Your vile presence disgusts me."

The child grunted and Takeji watched, stone faced, as she got to her feet. Then to his surprise the little demon balled her hands into fists at her sides and glared at him, but the effect was ruined by the tears he could clearly see brimming her eyes. He cocked a brow, unmoved. She sniffled once, twice, and then to his utter surprise and bafflement, her face suddenly crumbled, her lower lip trembled, and she promptly burst into loud tears before spinning on her heel and running away.

"P-Papaaaaaaaaaaa!"

Takeji frowned. Papa? Were the brat's kin nearby, then? Body tense and weapon raised, he waited, prepared to either fight or flee - because he wasn't a fool and knew when he was in over his head - but when no demons came bursting out of the tree line, Takeji slowly relaxed.

Bewildered and more than a little annoyed at the whole debacle - what a waste of time! - the diplomat scoffed in derision as he turned to watch the little demon brat scurry away. And then right at that exact moment, a figure donned in red dropped to the ground seemingly out of nowhere and Takeji felt a wave of relief sweep through him. Finally! This had to be his demon quarry.

Nodding, Takeji stepped forward and opened his mouth to call out a greeting—

And then froze in his tracks as the greeting abruptly died on his tongue. Because the little demon girl, the one he'd just pointed his weapon at and shoved to the ground, ran straight to the figure robed in red and Takeji could do naught but watch with a growing sense of horrified dread as the older demon knelt down to take the child into his arms.

All color promptly drained from his face and Takeji suddenly felt sick to his stomach. He glanced behind the pair and he was somehow not at all surprised to find the twin girls from earlier glaring at them and holding onto the skirts of their mother with a monk garbed in violet robes beside her. They too were staring at him in a not so friendly manner, but upon returning his gaze to the two demons, Takeji numbly thought that if looks could kill, he would surely be dead by now.

Because the demon robed in red - which was now unmistakably the child's father and none other than Inuyasha, the demon he'd come here for - was glaring absolute murder at him and it was obvious that he was. Not. Pleased.

Takeji swallowed and unconsciously backed up a step. With one small hand fisting her father's robes, the child had the other pointing an accusatory finger at him as she no doubt recited to him their earlier…ah, exchange. Inuyasha said nothing in response, but he didn't need to. The deep, nearly subsonic growl that erupted from his mouth, complete with fully bared fangs in a truly fearsome snarl, told him very clearly of his thoughts on his daughter's mistreatment by him.

Which, if Takeji had to guess, were not very Takeji-friendly. At all.

Somehow managing to fight against the urge to flee, Takeji swallowed hard as Inuyasha pushed to his feet and stalked toward him with that same murderous look on his face. Something told him, perhaps some deeply rooted self-preservation instinct, that if he even tried to run right then, it would not end well for him. So he remained where he was and tried valiantly to control the trembling in his body as he slowly, very slowly, tucked his dagger back from whence it came.

Inuyasha stopped in front of him and Takeji cleared his throat before attempting a placating smile, but it looked more like a grimace than anything. "Ah…I assume you are…In—"

One second Takeji was staring into the scowling features of one pissed off dog demon. The next there was a bright flash of light and then he was staring at the business end of a very large and very sharp sword. With the tip just a hair's breadth away from his nose, Takeji gasped sharply and stumbled back a step out of instinct.

Sweet merciful heavens! How—?

"Usually I'd ask who the fuck you are," the demon growled, his eyes twin slits of baleful gold. "But honestly, I can't really bring myself to care enough to know the name of the asshole who threatened my daughter when she was doing nothing but playing with her friends."

Takeji blanched for the second time and he could actually feel himself breaking out in a cold sweat. He fucked up. Oh dear god he'd fucked up so bad—

"There's—there's been a misunderstanding," Takeji tried in a voice higher than usual, raising his hands up in what he hoped was a placating gesture as he eyed the very sharp point of that blade. "I—I admit I've made a grave mistake—"

"Shut the fuck up and tell me why I shouldn't gut you where you stand," Inuyasha hissed, lips feeling back off his fangs in another fierce snarl. With his ears pinned back and those golden eyes glaring absolute death at him, the demon made quite the menacing picture. Takeji had the brief, if a bit ludicrous thought, that perhaps the demon Naraku perished from the sheer animosity that was coming off of the silver-haired demon in waves.

Swallowing once, twice, Takeji realized that he only had his quick wit to get him out of his certain predicament. So bracing himself, he opened his mouth—

"He's from the continent, Inuyasha. You can't hurt him."

Startled hazel eyes swung toward the source of the voice but amber eyes stayed locked on their target, the only acknowledgment of the voice a flick of an ear.

The owner of the voice the human diplomat could only presume was the child's mother, as the child in question was standing behind her legs and was actually smirking at him. He frowned.

"You're from Shenshi," the woman remarked and Takeji swung his gaze back to her. "Right?"

Though her expression wasn't openly friendly, it wasn't exactly unfriendly either, however the human diplomat still felt he needed to tread carefully. Because while her face didn't betray anything, her stare was hard and her mouth had tightened into a thin, flat line. She had one hand on her daughter's head while the other clutched a longbow, and belatedly he realized she had a quiver of arrows slung across her back. He barely held in a flinch as he realized this was one of the demon's companions that had assisted in slaying Naraku, possibly the young woman in which Inuyasha held a more meaningful relationship.

A much more meaningful relationship, if the child currently glaring daggers at him was anything to go by since she was more or less living proof of it.

Wonderful. So he'd gone and threatened the only child of two of the most powerful beings in Japan. Clearly he'd stepped over the wrong grave and pissed somebody off.

Clearing his throat and aiming a strained smile toward the woman who was still awaiting his reply, Takeji nodded once. "Ah, y-yes, my lady. I'm—"

"The diplomat Ambassador Sharaku sent to convince Inuyasha to join his ranks so he'd have the support and protection of 'The Great Slayer of Naraku.'" The woman raised a delicate brow at him. "How am I doing so far?"

Takeji had the good grace to look a mite sheepish. "Ah…well—"

"You can't kill him, Inuyasha," she repeated and Takeji thought she sounded disappointed. "If he goes missing, the ambassador will send his troops to find out what happened or if he returns injured, it could be taken as an insult and you can imagine what would happen after that. You would risk mine or Moroha's life like that, and you know it."

Inuyasha growled but said nothing to refute her words, so Takeji assumed he agreed.

"He threatened her, Kagome," the demon spat, inching the blade closer to his throat and Takeji flinched. "Called her a fucking animal, shoved her down, and waved a goddamn dagger in her face! You can't honestly expect me to let that—"

"Papa," the child - Moroha - suddenly said, successfully stalling her father's angry tirade. A quick glance revealed the girl, still sticking close to her mother, was staring at the older demon with big brown eyes, bright with the threat of tears as she worried her bottom lip. And evidently the sight was enough to calm the raging storm of Inuyasha's fury because he grimaced, released a low growl, and then Takeji watched in stunned amazement as the massive sword suddenly transformed into a rusty katana before it was sheathed at his hip.

With a weapon no longer at his throat, Takeji could breathe a little easier and he released a breath he hadn't even been aware he'd been holding. But then he sucked it right back in when Inuyasha suddenly stepped in close and got in his face, a low, threatening growl leaking past rightly clenched teeth bared in another snarl. Golden eyes bore into his own, filled with a lethal warning that had the human male's back straightening and his blood to run cold in his veins.

"You listen carefully, asshole," Inuyasha hissed, glaring so heatedly it was a wonder Takeji didn't burst into flame. "Don't you dare think that my wife's words have any sort of sway over my decision to spare your pathetic life. I'm not scared of your weakling ambassador and I sure as hell ain't scared of his little human army. No, the only reason that I let you live is because I don't want my daughter, the one you foolishly threatened when she had done nothing wrong, to see me sully my hands with your disgusting blood when I reduce you to nothing more than a bloody smear on the ground."

Takeji paled and swallowed thickly. That particular image was…not pleasant.

Inuyasha watched the color drain from his face. Satisfied, he sneered before saying in a growl filled with sinister promise, "Now get the fuck outta my village and if you ever touch my daughter again, I'll gut you so fast you won't even have time to fucking scream."

Then with that, Inuyasha leveled him with one last dark scowl before spinning on his heel and stalking away, a clear dismissal. Neither mother nor daughter even spared the frozen human male a glance as Inuyasha paused to pick his daughter up into his arms before striding away, his wife close to one side and his friends on the other.

From over his shoulder, Takeji could only watch in a mixture of shock and befuddlement as the little demon girl named Moroha smirked and then stuck her tongue out at him, safe and sound in her father's arms.

Left standing in a state of numb bewilderment, Takeji blinked, looked down at himself, and had the passing thought that it was a very good thing he'd decided to wear brown trousers that day.

[i-simp-for-gintoki]

Visiting Yuji in Tokyo

“yuji x reader where she was childhood friends with yuji and its basically the friends to lover sort of thing? and basically reader is visiting tokyo and meets up with yuji for the first time in months?? bonus if gojo and megumi are there :)”-anon

Damn its either super short or long no inbetween huh? Sorry if this isn’t exactly what you wanted! Some of the characters are little ooc (when are they not when i write them-).This turned out much much longer than it needed to be

You and Yuji have known each other since kindergarten

He’s such a sweet kid its always really fun to hang out with him

You guys play lots of video games together and are basically inseparable

Constantly reading manga or watching anime its great

Your parents disapproved of you hanging out with a dude all the time but you could care less

Why should you only be friends with your own gender? Thats so stupid

You always wondered about why yuji had such great strength and speed but he says he was just born that way

Hes just built different

Around middle school his grandpa’s health had dropped and was moved to the hospital

You did your best to make sure yuji stayed in good spirits and often visited the older itadori with him

He’s not the best at wording things but hes always there for emotional support

Maybe it was around 7th grade you noticed something was different around yuji

Like he himself hasn’t changed but whenever you look at him your heart just melts

Your thoughts or compliments seem more filled with love for him and thats when you realized you started to fall for him

Thinking the crush would go away you didn’t act much on it

Oh what a fool you were

Around 8th grade yuji had started acting kinda weird around you

He’d be much more easy to fluster and tenses up for a second if you ever make contact

You confronted him about it and cue the very awkward and middle school like confession

“I really like you!

You were so happy you confessed back and said that the only reason you didn’t before was because you feared to ruin your friendship

He says even if he somehow didn’t like you back that something like that wouldn’t effect anything

From then on you guys are such a wholesome couple

All the cuddles

No fancy dates just casual arcade or movie sort of things

His grandpa gave him a hard time but approved of your relationship

Throughout 8th grade summer and the beginning of highschool everything was going great

But a few months into highschool lots of things happened

Yuji’s grandpa had passed away, he and his friends in the exorcist(?) club had gotten hurt and after that night he had weird markings on his cheeks right below his eyes

And to top it all off now he was supposedly moving to tokyo??

“Yuji why are you moving away? My parents would gladly take you in you know”

He tells you he can’t explain why which breaks your heart

“Who are you staying with then??” he stops for a second and it pains him to lie to you. “A distant relative of mine, he works at a private school and thats where i will be going from now on.”

“But what about us?”

And so you guys decided to do a long distance relationship

Every night when you can you call and chat for hours

But thats not enough

You want to be held or hold him, you want to just cuddle or atleast be in the same room

It pains you to have a relationship through a screen and you grow respect for those who do

Trust isn’t an issue since you know yuji wouldnt even think to cheat at all

Probably doesnt even know what the word means

But after a few months you decide to go to tokyo for a few days

With the help of your parents you rent a room in a hotel and head there

Were just gonna pretend your parents are super super chill(and slightly uncaring like my parents would never let me) and lets you go to a whole city by yourself for several nights

You were super nervous and excited

Its your first time visiting a huge city like tokyo and its gonna be the first time you see yuji in months

Itadori was super excited that you were in tokyo

So excited that he got lost trying to head to the hotel you were staying at

After an extra hour you guys finally meet

He walks through the hotel lobby doors and gives a smile and a wave

In an instant you tackle him in a hug which he GLADLY hugs back in

After just holding each other for a while he decides to show you around

Hes still clearly learning the area himself but he’s very excited to show what he does know

“The place over here makes amazing sushi! Oh! And over here they sell little action figures! Oh oh and over here the steak is kinda bad but its cheap so its worth it! And-” you could only smile as he pointed in random directions with one hand, the other was busy holding yours

Buying food from a bunch of random vendors and wearing silly getups you guys take loads of pictures

Tons of hugs and cheek kisses

Yes its frowned upon to be touchy and stuff in public in japan but honestly you guys could care less

The sun was setting and you guys were currently sitting at a park munchkin on some crepes when you turn to him

“Yuji, do you think i could visit who your staying with? I’d hate to impose but i just wanna know if your in good hands”

His chewing pauses

Its not like he didn’t want you tell about jujutsu

But he doesn’t want you to be apart of that world, he wants you to stay as safe as possible with no harm ever headed your ways

With him being a vessel for sukuna gojo had told him that he and his friends could potentially be targeted

Theres a reason sorceres put up cloaks when engaging in battles and its so normal civilians can continue living in peace without the knowledge these monstrosities actually exist

“Mm its a bit sudden and he’s out on a mis-er meeting right now so maybe tomorrow?” he says

You frown, you can tell he’s lying but he wouldn’t do it without a reason

“Fine. But Yuji. Just know that if you ever feel unsafe or want to come back your more than welcome too. There will always be a spot for you at my home” you say hugging him

You both kinda forgot you were holding crepes and when you pulled away from each other laughed as the ice cream and sauce was smeared all over your shirts/jackets

He walks you back to the hotel and says goodnight with a kiss

The next two days went by in a flash

Just spending time with itadori, even if it was just sitting in silence has been the most fun youve had in months

He had showed you many places and has boughten many small trinkets for you to remember

Your phone has grown about 300 photos just from the past couple days with him

It was about midday of your final day in tokyo and so you both wanted to make the best of it

You both where sitting inside a cafe exchanging stories and just chatting when suddenly two people walked in the cafe

One was very tall and had spiked up white hair and was wearing a blindfold, and the other had spiky/messy black hair

You didn’t think much of it at first but did question the blindfold

‘A fashion choice?’

Turning your attention back to yuji you gave him a soft smile as you listened to his ramblings about a manga

“I love you” you said cutting him off

Immediately his face turned red and whatever he was just saying turned into stuttering nonsense

Before he could respond he let out a short yell when someone placed a hand on his shoulder

It was the two dudes who walked in from earlier

“So this is what you’ve been doing.” “Fushiguro! Gojo sensei!”

The shorter one who looks yuji’s age started talking about how it wasn’t good to turn his phone on mute and go out the whole day

The tall one gives you a wave

“Sorry to interrupt your date but we gotta take yuji away for a bit” he says grabbing yuji’s collar

“Wait who are you guys?” you ask and they pause to give short introductions

“Fushiguro Megumi.” “Gojo Satoru, nice to meet ya miss girlfriend” “How did you know??” Yuji says making gojo laugh

“Its pretty obvious, you didn’t do much of a job hiding it” he says pulling yuji a little bit more.

“O-Oh im L/n Y/n, nice to meet you” you say realizing you forgot to introduce yourself

As the three chatted along with each other, you sat in silence as you tried to remember where you heard gojo’s name from

‘Oh yeah, he’s the one who yuji described as his relative. Even if it was really fast since he tends to change subjects whenever i ask’

“Wait Gojo? White hair...blind fold..are you Yuji’s relative?” you ask making both of them pause

They both turn towards yuji who gave a sheepish smile

“Thats me, im his mothers little cousin” Gojo said, a very quick and random asspull

“So why does he call you Gojo-sensei instead of uncle…Satoru?” “Well if im his moms cousin that would make me his cousin once removed wouldn’t it? And he calls me sensei since im a teacher at a school he goes to”

“And what about you?” you ask the other boy

“A classmate.” he says in a very short and uninterested tone

“Welp lets go” Gojo says dragging yuji but he quickly resists

“Wait wait! Sensei can i please stay? Today is her last day here and i don’t know when i will be able to see her again”

The teacher and student stares at each other for a long time

You have literally no clue what the blindfolded man could but thinking its so hard to read him

Then again you just met him so

Gojo sighs and lets go of yuji

“Just this once, and only because im the greatest sensei you’ve ever had. Lets go megumi. See ya miss girlfriend” gojo says walking away with a wave

Megumi looks surprised but follows him “really?” “Yeah yeah its fine, its only a couple of grade 3’s anywa…” as their voices faded when they left the building you gave yuji a look

“Are you going to get in trouble?” “im probably going to die in training…” “huh?” “nothin”

The rest of the day you guys hang out and its mmm

Yuji would be such a good boyfriend hes so wholesome

When its time for you to part he give you a big hug, kiss and ‘i love you’

You do the same and tear up a bit

With one final photo you head back to your home town

You make it a mission to visit tokyo more often and yuji tries to visit you whenever he can from then on

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

to tag on to that post that’s like “why am i nostalgic for my teen years??? bitch i didnt even have fun!!!!” that i’ve reblogged probably in the last few months (im too lazy to go back through my blog to find it if i have, leave me be) .... i think some of the reasons im nostalgic for my teens years are the following:

- no real responsibilities other than homework and assignments that i barely ever did from years 7-10 

- i feel like time went so fucking fast (courtesy of some of my old fb memories posts in various months during 2012 and 2013) that i just wasnt prepared to be in my early teens & 20s- let alone to my mid 20s so fucking soon.

- there was a solid routine in the morning of each term- get up at 6:45am, wash my face and skin care stuff, then straighten my fringe (or sometimes all of my hair, halfheartedly), tie my hair up and have my breakfast etc etc etc. then leave for school

- despite all my jokes about being a Useless Failure Of A Human Being™️ when i left school or whatever, i did have a genuine hope underneath it all that i’d some day hopefully be successful (even if my facebook posts from year 10 to year 12 (ie 2011-2013) weren’t very good tbh).

- oh yeah NO PANDEMIC

- it was ~actually fun~ being an unabashed emo/scene kid lmao- no matter how much i cringe at 12-16yo me’s peak All Time Low Phase™️

- again time just zipped the fuck by and i was suddenly in business college and then uni and then fuck. i had a mental breakdown in postgrad bc it was too much work and pressure and fuck how do i cope. i kinda felt like i’d reached a point, like a stunted point in my emotional growth or whatever once i hit my 20s bc i went through so much stuff in the last 3 years of high school and then some other shit all before age 20 really hit.

- also like. instagram and snapchat weren’t huge so we took loads of corny unedited emo kid photos, but also did edit some of them with shitty 2008/09 nintendo dsi filters or photobucket filters for myspace. like we were actually allowed to be cringy asf and not be instagram/snapchat flawless for a bunch of followers on a constant basis. like yes my haircuts were awful and i do cringe at the stupid poses i did in some of my photos with my friends. but still. we got to have FUN.

- you could look like a fucking hot mess with your makeup. like yes there was a bit of pressure to learn proper makeup, obvs. but generally it was almost like.... like the more of a hot mess you looked, the better. because you were allowed to make mistakes with it. but thank god it wasn’t the level of the YT beauty gurus “baking their face” and whatever other irritating names they can come up with for new techniques.... and having to know exactly what the fuck that is and having to buy $75 setting spray so your face that’s full of $250 or more worth of makeup never falls off your face. i mean, come on! shine bright like a cheeto in your incredibly mismatched maybelline foundation which said it was matte, fuck damn it, but it’s making you look shiny!!!! you can use your strawberry lemonade lip smacker balm as blush to cover up the shiny bits??? but who cares??!! it’s 2000 and fucking 9 babey!!!

but now, if you don’t have an almost professional level of expertise/knowledge and lot of makeup stuff, then it’s a monstrosity. a mistake. what are you? how do you NOT know what baking is in regards to makeup? you fool! no! we don’t care if you’re 14! YOU HAVE TO KNOW CASSANDRA! YOU! HAVE! TO! KNOW! now spend 163863733 hours on youtube to revise your know how and skills, so then you do your makeup better than fredia, who doesn’t EVEN KNOW what blush is and how to apply it. i mean how embarrassing 🙄??? am i right?! YOU DONT KNOW WHAT A LIP KIT IS AND WHY YOU NEED IT??? SICKENING. DISGUSTING. YOU HEATHEN. also please spend $100 at sephora on a kylie jenner mega lip kit, boo!!! you do you!!! but if you make a mistake during applying anything in the lip kit or on the rest of your face, EVERYONE WILL KNOW!!! anyway, you get the picture.

like yeah high school did fucking suck for me like it did/does for basically everyone... but god it was much better having a sense of routine in the morning and having at least a minor glimmer of hope that i’d hopefully get somewhere eventually. but that’s all been upended completely by covid and self-isolation. my routine has been out of wack for the past month, with the pandemic rising again in victoria and also in new south wales, with restrictions resetting and stuff again in NSW and vic, like.... will i ever get a job (no matter what is is) in the fucked aussie economy?? just who the fuck knows??? uncertainty sucks.

and also i generally don’t know how to keep to schedule without some 3rd party entity like uni to help. like i miss the structure of on campus study bc i didn’t really have to set that myself, in a way, bc the uni scheduled the classes for the profs in the subjects i had. and i followed the same schedule of doing my face and hair etc every day that i went to uni. but now that’s gone as well.

[rigelmejo]

im thinking about how i heard avenuex once say that mxtx writes a bit simpler than priest... like they said mo dao zu shi is like... easier to read (although not as ‘literary’ whether i guess that’s good or bad depends on tastes?)...

and i’m at a midpoint with this opinion cause on the one hand: i do think maybe the descriptions in modaozushi are a bit more straightforward. However, everything is xianxia genre (is that the right genre for mdzs? i get confused between xianxia and wuxia). And although I know some key noun words, the way people TALK in this genre is a different style... like the MDZS opening alone is like ‘people rejoice the evil is dead’ and ‘for a generation he’s presumed dead’ and ‘the jiang clan, lan clan, jin clan, wen clan, the sect leaders, the yiling patriarch’ and... so many of those words like sect and clan and the society type words are all really genre specific. So like yes, the descriptions are clear... but how people talk? Sort of??? Until I get used to the genre.

Whereas... like Guardian is an example. It has a few god-past scenes like the one with Shennong and Kunlun that I’ve read without help. The ‘fantasy’ and ‘past’ elements in Guardian are like... idk they feel almost like they create themselves, like their in-story contained mythology to some degree (even if some parts are taken or inspired from broader genre and mythology ideas). So its simple to follow: Kunlun is god of mountains, Shennong is dying, Shen Wei is a ghost king, Shen Wei loves Kunlun, Kunlun knows he’s going to die, Kunlun talks with Shennong about how everything eventually has to die including Kunlun, the world is old and this is the early days and its just gods and the world and the ghost monsters at first. It’s hard to explain but... in some ways I feel like a bit of the old-fantasy scenes in Guardian read like a creation story, so they introduce themselves more based on ‘assume reader doesn’t know what is what or how it works yet.’ And the words they use in the old-fantasy scenes are generally dialogues I find easily comprehensible. However... a lot of my comfort with Priest’s version of the genre, is I have a lot of familiarity with the story-specific vocab for Guardian, whereas in MDZS I have more general xianxia vocab and proper nouns vocab, but not necessarily familiarity with the speaking styles. 

Also... some of Priest’s novels, like Silent Reading, are modern. That story’s setting is just easier in general to follow with less context, since its all real life applicable words. Guardian, while fantasy, often has mundane real life applicable settings and words, which also helps with figuring out words and context - in a way mdzs has less of. 

However... I definitely think Priest’s writing is... complex. While there’s some context that gets easier... well...

The sheer number of adjectives I don’t know? The amount of descriptive lines? Some are chengyu, some are likely self created metaphors by the author, some are clearly lines that have like 3-5 layers of meaning and imply extra meaning from their extended context (like if I knew who Shennong was in actual mythology? If I had more background on the Kunlun mountains? I imagine the scenes I read would mean a LOT more in terms of depth of implications). Beyond simply comprehending the actual actions taking place in the story, and the barest guess at how characters are physically showing emotion - Priest is doing a hell of a lot more with the writing. 

I read the intro to Silent Reading yesterday. The first paragraph is literally just about the city - about how its split in half, east and west, and its like a beautiful picture masking a monster like a woman concealing with makeup. How the old part of the city is poorer, the newer part is the shopping district and is flourishing, and how developers are buying up the poorer parts and raising the value of the whole city but putting more pressure on the poor. And then it goes MORE in depth - this is just the parts I could comprehend. It took 2 readings of the paragraph for me to catch the second half - how the wealth is affecting the city and how business interests are affecting it. And you know damn well the societal implications of this unequally effected society are going to come up again and again in the novel, since hey it was mentioned LITERALLY IN THE FIRST PARAGRAPH. How is that for establishing a theme? Along with the intro paragraph establishing that this city has HISTORY, that its CHANGING, and that it contains monstrosities - precluding the buildup of the eventual murder cases that will make up the bulk of the future plot. On the surface, its just a physical description of location - and that physical description was the easiest part for me to catch. But if its read more in depth, its saying a ton of stuff with just a few physical description sentences. And this was just... stuff I could pick up on... I’m sure there’s more.

Priest’s novels are so chock full of this stuff its a bit daunting. Nevermind the fact that since EVERYTHING is interwoven into main details, its more of a struggle to comprehend the main gist of the plot since deeper more meaningful descriptors and metaphors and stylistic choices are intrinsic pieces of each sentence. 

I tried reading Tian Ya Ke the other day, and I only got through a few paragraphs. One of the hardest parts was just following who is who, since Priest likes not always giving names at first, so its a mystery of who someone is at first and you have to get to know them as mysterious people based on what they do. At least, sometimes. Random unnamed coffee buyer turns out to be main character in Silent Reading - and the deliveryman an important secondary. In Tian Ya Ke unnamed man who visits a secret prison has some ties to spy organizations and is presumably a main character. So I can’t just speed through an ‘unknown’ persons details - I might need to hold onto them later in case they turn out to be a named character later, where I need to remember what they did before they were named. Also on these unnamed - there’s galore descriptions of how they smile, their noses, their eyes, their hair lengths, their glasses, their style of clothes - get comfortable sifting through gratuitious physical descriptions which will ALSO be full of things with deeper meanings if you can catch them!

I’m not sure how much MDZS does this too, because I imagine it does all of this to some degree. And my impression is skewed, since I have a traditional copy of the first mdzs novel - so I’m mostly lost because of traditional characters, before I even get caught on the genre words. But I do think it... ramps up the plot a bit faster than Priest’s? If that makes sense. Like, plots in Priest are fast, but I feel like there’s also a lot of ‘what’s in this character’s head or perspective’ moments (which is a lot like I write so I love seeing it). And idk it can be harder to interpret that sometimes, since all narratives are biased and you get heavy details in one perspective narrative then fall into another one with new biases and details. 

Tamendegushi, meanwhile? By far the easiest writing style wise. I think that also makes the ‘depth’ of the writing easier to notice - you have to do less comprehension of the basics, so it takes less time to notice what the basics might be conveying beyond their exact details. Very beginner friendly... I recommend this baby FIRST if you’re a beginner like me. ToT

I do wonder if mdzs would be easier for me to read rn...

[paintingwithdarkness]

Last one xD 43 with bluepulse again? Im a mess sorry

“You’re lucky you’re cute.”

“Bart! Amorcito! I’m home!” Jaime called as he stepped inside his and his boyfriend’s apartment. He’d gotten off from work early today, on the account that his boss had taken pity on Jaime for scheduling him on his birthday. Something he was exceptionally grateful for. He would much rather spend the rest of the day with his boyfriend than dealing with cranky patients at the hospital where he was employed.

As he toed off his shoes by the door, Jaime called out to his boyfriend again, having not heard a response to his initial greeting. “Cariño?”

“In the kitchen!” came Bart’s reply.

Jaime furrowed his eyebrows. Bart’s voice sounded odd. His reponse has been fast (Bart tended to talk pretty fast, but his response had been quicker than normal), and his tone high-pitched.

Quickly, Jaime locked the front door and hung his keys on the pegboard before making his way into his and Bart’s little kitchenette. Upon entry, his eyes widened to the size of dinner plates and his jaw dropped to the floor.

“Dios mio, Bart! What did you do?!”

The entire room was covered in chocolate cake batter. It was all over the counters, the floor, the walls- even the ceiling. Not to mention the mess he’d made with the flour, the broken eggs all over the floor and the bottle of vegetable oil Bart had spilled over, which was creating a large grease slick on the counter.

Bart gave a nervous laugh. “Uh, Happy Birthday?” He held out a messily frosted cupcake to Jaime, the blue icing covering his fingers.

The now twenty-three year old shook his head in disbelief. “How?” he asked. “How did you manage to make this big of a mess? The box has instructions on it.”

Jaime located the soggy cake box on the floor, next to the carton of broken eggs.

“I followed them!” Bart defended himself. “But the instructions don’t tell you not to take the moded mixer out of the bowl while it’s on!” He crossed his arms quickly, causing a cloud of flour to poof up from his shirt.

Jaime shook his head again. “Cariño, everyone knows you’re not supposed to take the mixer out of the bowl while it’s still running.” He let out a heavy sigh. “I’m guessing that’s how the cake batter got everywhere?” He looked up at the chocolate-spattered ceiling. How the hell were they supposed to clean that up?

Bart nodded. “I had enough left to make a cupcake.” He tried handing the blue and brown monstrosity of a cake to Jaime, who took it gingerly and set it down on the table.

Jaime shook his head again as he surveyed the mess. Not a single spot in the kitchenette had gone untouched, including Bart. The entirety of his shirt was dusted in flour, and a good amount of it had gotten into his auburn hair as well. There was cake batter on his cheek and a smudge of it on his forehead, and his hands were stained blue with the frosting he’d used way too much of on the tiny cupcake.

“You’re lucky you’re cute,” Jaime told him, grabbing the treat and taking a bite. He cringed. Bart had gone wayyyy overboard on sugar.

“That bad, huh?” Bart asked him.

Jaime smiled apologetically. “I appreciate the effort, Amor, but this seems like it was a lot more trouble than it’s worth.” He set the terrible cupcake down on the table again. “We’re going to have to clean all of this up.”

Bart nodded and untied his apron. It had done very little to actually protect Bart’s clothes from the mess. They would definitely need to be run through the laundary ASAP. “I’ll get the mop.”

As Bart went to pass Jaime on his way to the supply closet, Jaime grabbed him by the wrist, bringing the younger man to a stop. Using his thumb, Jaime cleaned the dallop of chocolate from Bart’s cheek and popped it into his mouth. He did the same for the smudge on his boyfriend’s forehead before releasing him again to get the cleaning utensils.

Bart quickly came back with the mop, a broom and dustpan, and a roll of paper towels. Jaime grabbed the container of antibacterial wipes they kept under the kitchen sink. As Jaime set to work on wiping down the countertops, Bart swept up all of the flour and eggshells that had ended up on the floor.

As he worked, Bart began humming a little tune that Jaime immediately recognized. When he got to the part switch, Jaime humored him and actually sang the words out loud.

“I’ve been searching my whole life to find my own place, and maybe it’s the party talking or the chocolate fondue...”

Bart laughed and then he and Jaime sang the chorus together.

“And it’s nothing like I’ve ever known before! Love is an open door! Love is an open door! Love is an open door...”

They took turns singing “with you”s at each other and then continued the duet with Bart taking Anna’s lines and Jaime singing Hans’.

When they eventually reached the end of the song, Jaime chuckled. “I’m glad you finally agreed to let me culture you in the fine art of Disney movies. I think it’s actually a sin in this time period to not watch them.”

Bart laughed too. “Guess I’m lucky I landed in this time period then! I’ve got a super crash boyfriend and Frozen!”

Jaime shook his head fondly. He walked around the island in the middle of the kitchen so that he could wrap Bart up in his arms. “I think I’m the lucky one,” he said, pecking Bart gently. “I’ve got the most adorable boyfriend in the universe. Even if he does make messes that I have to clean up.”

Bart giggled and leaned up on his toes to kiss Jaime properly on the lips. “Happy Birthday, Blue.”

Hopefully this is okay @jackfrostheart! I think I got about ten cavities writing this. I got the idea from my own idiotic mistakes in the kitchen in the past. Believe it or not, I’ve actually done the same thing Bart did and took the mixer out of the bowl when it was still on. Cake batter E V E R Y W H E R E.

Also, yes, these two dorks would most definitely be the type of couple to have watched all of the Disney movies in existence, and know all the words to the songs. You can’t convince me otherwise.

[swyllh]

[wonwoo] my mistress’ eyes are nothing like the sun

title: my mistress’ eyes are nothing like the sun [from sonnet 130]

pairing: wonwoo x reader 

word count: 3081

genre: fluff. just. fluff.

"leav me alone," you curse, catching a high-five from vernon. it's a good pun. you've been waiting to use it since thinking it up last sunday night when you were bitching with seungkwan. 

you: 192, wonwoo: 192. boom.

wonwoo rolls his eyes. "one measly poet doesn't diminish the value of page poetry."

you scoff, "yeah it just olib-obil- fucking- oblierated your argument on publishers being gatekeepers of page poetry."

"obliterated," wonwoo corrects scathingly. that despicable raccoon. "at least it's better than not having a gateway at all."

"no, because slam is fundamentally different," you say between gritted teeth. 

wonwoo starts packing his bag. "so it's not poetry, you admit?"

god. you raise your heads to the high heavens, and are met with the questionable, green remnants of that-incident-with-jeonghan-and-seokmin on the ceiling. the clatter of the ceiling fan offers no enlightenment. why do idiots roam freely among us, you ask. brr, brr, cries the fan. 

wonwoo: 193, you: 192.

"no!" you exclaim. 

wonwoo raises an eyebrow, shifting his bag strap on his bony shoulder. one day he'll fall onto his own shoulder and puncture his huge, inflated ego. one day. "no, it's not poetry?"

"i am not conceding," you snap back.

"so there is something to concede." 

wonwoo: 194, you: 192. 

you chase after him angrily. damn long legs. he'd have been executed in some ancient civilisation for being so freakishly tall. freaking slender man. 

"poems weren't written down at first - that's an eurocentric notion that dismisses other groups of people who didn't have written language," you pause to catch for breath. 

as you amble past jeonghan, he reaches out and ruffles your head without so much as a look in your direction; your rowdy garnish arguments are a common occurrence in the east wing now. at precisely 10:14am the sounds of heavy sarcasm and undiluted exasperation ring throughout the hallway like clockwork.

"poetry came from songs, odes," you wave your hand around to gesture other unnamed synonyms. "slam poetry represents a revolution - not just because it introduces newer concerns and techniques of rhyme and rhythm, but because it is a tribute to older times."

wonwoo holds up a hand. you shove it away. "don't interrupt me."

he quirks an eyebrow. you find you have nothing else to add. "okay, interrupt me."

"as poetic as your argument sounds," he says, slowing down as you near the corner before you part, "you do realise that nobody's consciously paying tribute to the ancient origins of poetry and hymns, right?"

you roll your eyes. "even if they don't have the intent, so what?"

"so what, indeed," wonwoo echoes softly. there's got to be menace lurking somewhere in his words. 

you puff your chest out, ready to defend slam poetry's honour to the very last. wonwoo stares at you. and then his watch. and then back at you again. 

"w-what?" you say, not stuttering. "well, if they don't have the intent then doesn't it also show like, a return to some common ground? of humanity or something."

"you mean to say that slam poetry is innate?" wonwoo deadpans. "like how newborn babies come out -"

you roll your eyes. "no! i mean the rhythm. the need to vocalise."

wonwoo crosses his arms. "interruption deduction."

wonwoo: 194, you: 191.

"hey! you interrupted me earlier!" you bite back.

"technically you had nothing left to say." and then, "what about babies born deaf or dumb?"

you hate how slimey his reasoning is. there's got to be some loophole. this guy's got the soul of a lawyer but the major of an english lit. what the heck.

you huff, squaring your shoulders. "that's because you interrupted my train of thought! and about disabled babies -"

"you need to think faster," he says quickly. "what was it about disabled babies?"

... wonwoo: 195, you: 191.

you settle for crossing your arms, leaning against the wall of the intersection. "well, i concede the point about disabled babies, but only because the nuance is controversial and cannot be covered in a fast-paced environment as such."

as you finish your sentence, the bell rings. wonwoo eyes you cautiously. the rush of students stampeding off to their next class breezes past the both of you, cocooning you in a whirl of noises and varying degrees of body odour or thickly-layered deodorant. 

wonwoo leans in, and repeats a set of numbers to you. 

"...380," you echo back. 

he nods, and turns to join the stream of migrating salmon towards their final destination. advanced calculus. what a nerd. you can't believe you actually know someone who takes that willingly in the arts stream.

"...380," you repeat, walking off to your own class.

-

"so you're telling me," kimmy says, placing a hand in front of you. 

"interruption deduction," you blurt out.

kimmy retracts her hand warily like you're a particularly grotesque descendant of some arachnid monstrosity. "you have jargons. ugh."

"kinky," chan says, tapping at his game.

kimmy shoves him out of the seat. chan winces, though his fingers never leave the screen.

"freaking hell, i almost died!"

kimmy snaps her fingers at you again. "you mean to say he gave you his number after that weird mating ritual you guys went through."

you hold up a finger. "first, yes, but only to continue the argument, and secondly, it's not a mating ritual. he's wrong about-"

"but it is weird," kimmy says. "you talk to the guy you claim to hate-"

"-he's misguided and-"

"-you claim to hate," kimmy emphasises, slamming your finger down, "every. single. lit class, and it's not even for class participation."

"that's a good idea," chan says, thumbs pummelling down on his phone. "two birds with one stone."

kimmy grabs your hands, beseeching. "please just use your head and think."

-

you [1902]: http://watchtube/video_knob_poetry_seventeen+right+here_11294

you [1902]: http://watchtube/video_knob_poetry_like+ocean+waves_11653

you [1902]: http://watchtube/video_knob_poetry_twenty+four+seven_12472

you [1902]: http://watchtube/video_knob_poetry_boom+boom_18273

you [1902]: http://watchtube/video_knob_poetry_gibun+gibun+gibun_17349

wonwoo [2024]: jesus christ.

wonwoo [2045]: alright, some of them are good.

you [2046]: see??????

wonwoo [2046]: always exceptions to the rule.

you [2046]: u g h

you [2046]: are you serious 

wonwoo [2047]: i did say some of them were good.

you [2047]:  h a 

wonwoo [2047]: i never said there weren't good ones. 

wonwoo [2047]: i just said that page poetry is generally of higher quality.

you [2048]: by what standards?

wonwoo [2048]: you haven't been able to prove the longevity of any particular slam poem.

wonwoo [2048]: wouldn't you say that's the problem?

wonwoo [2048]: its circulation isn't tied to any specific culture or reinforced thereafter. 

wonwoo [2049]: therefore: oral tradition doesn't apply here.

you [2050]: ..........

you [2050]: why longevity? why does it need to be tied to any culture? why rate slam according to the criteria of page poetry?

wonwoo [2050]: that's because you haven't set a criteria.

wonwoo [2051]: boom.

you [2051]: christ.

you [2051]: brb im going to work on history essay

you [2053]: this is n o t a cowardly retreat!!!!!!!!!!

wonwoo [2053]: you said it

you [2054]: i will be back!!!!!!!!!!

-

when you join her at lunch, kimmy gives you an odd look. you respond by pretending to change tables. she holds you down.

"where's wonwoo?" she says.

you roll your eyes. "join the club."

"no, seriously," she says, angling her head to glance behind you. "where is he?"

"how would i know?" you throw your hands up in the air, narrowly endangering your cutlery. "first vernon, then jeonghan, then professor lee, then this weird guy from whatever abstract math, then-"

kimmy pulls away. "from math?"

you fling your hands out at her, smiling widely at her scrunched up nose. "don't worry. i made sure to sanitise myself after contact."

kimmy groans. "not the point."

"then?" you wag an eyebrow. "you were spooked when he started joining our table."

"yeah," kimmy deadpans, picking up her chopsticks and pointing them at you. a dribble of soy sauce falls from it. "but since then he's been coming over every day without fail to bicker with you and so i got used to it."

you spread your arms out, appreciating the space and the rare stab of freedom and uncontested territory. "and now we are delivered from all our burdens."

kimmy pokes around at her noodles. "so you don't know where he is."

"lady!" you exclaim, jabbing your fork at her fishball. "no! i'm not a wonwoo-detector!"

she pauses, ignoring your heist. "you have his number."

"yeah?" 

kimmy gives you a meaningful look. "are you going to check if he's sick?"

"why?"

you've done it. kimmy's finally reached maximum-incredulity. for a moment you feel the urge to reach over your head to see if you've sprouted extra limbs or a third eye. with the way she's gawking at you, you think you might have regressed into a blobfish.

she presses a hand to her temples. sighs, and then steadies herself. "okay. at the very, very least, aren't you going to make sure he doesn't miss anything in class."

you think about it. "he's got other friends."

kimmy presses her fingers together like a steeple over her nose. BOI. "you are his friend."

"i wouldn't say friend," you say, shuddering at the word, even as you tug your phone out. "it's more, like-?"

you choke out a questionable, questioning sound. kimmy has a glimmer of hope in her eyes before sighing it away again. 

you [1236]: hey you sick?

wonwoo [1236]: yeah, a bit.

"yeah, he's sick," you report.

kimmy chews on her noodles. "tell him about class?"

you [1238]: so for lit today we went through freudian vs feminism, as well as why slam is better than page, and the homework is reading chapters 11-13

wonwoo [1238]: nice try.

you [1239]: you're not that sick then

wonwoo [1239]: i haven't moved an inch since freefalling onto my bed at 7 last night.

you [1240]: müde

wonwoo [1241]: is that german?

you [1241]: pun.

wonwoo [1242]: if you have to explain it it's not that good.

you [1242]: precautionary measures for a foolproof pun.

wonwoo [1243]: hey i'm sick remember

you [1243]: whats new

"it's cute and all," kimmy interrupts, drawing your attention back up to her, "to see you smile like a fool, but we got five more minutes and your food isn't gonna eat itself."

you frown, hard. "not smiling like a fool."

kimmy waves you away. "just eat."

when she rises to put away her tray, you turn back to your phone.

wonwoo [1244]: mean :(

wonwoo [1245]: ?

you [1247]: gtg class 

wonwoo [1247]: oh okay bye

you [1247]: ttyl

wonwoo [1250]: thanks, btw.

you[1251]: np

-

mingyu, from his other class, saddles you with a stack of math notes. holding them in your arms feels like an allergic reaction. you follow his haphazard instructions to get to wonwoo's room.  the security guard doesn't even blink when you walk into the building. so you do. 

the dorms are unexpectedly clean. doors are plain and apparently functional, the hallway is well lit, and noise isn't much of a concern. then again, it is a school day. 

you reach wonwoo's room. knock twice. the door opens to show a young lady with a dark red lip.

"is this wonwoo's room?"

she nods. "yeah, he's sleeping now."

you notice the way she's got on a too-large shirt. wonwoo's worn that in one of your lit classes. you hand her the stack of notes.

"these are from his math class."

she takes them. "ah, thank you! is there anything you want me to tell him when he wakes up?"

"no," you say. 

the door closes on you. you look down and see a pair of black strappy heels next to plain sneakers. 

-

wonwoo [2143]: did you come over?

you [2146]: yeah

wonwoo [2146]: thanks, for the notes.

you [2148]: np 

-

the reality of things don't sink in until you're stuck in a library cubicle, knees barely brushing against wonwoo's (that giant) and huddling over the table to doodle little devils on his side of the paper. you glance up, head almost bumping into wonwoo's, and then zip back down to jot another idea. 

come to college, they said. it would be intellectually stimulating, they said.

you can't believe you're prepping for a presentation by going through all of your arguments for and against slam poetry with him. it's all chan's fault, you think bitterly, watch as he separates argument from argument with careful underlines. suggesting to actually make this class participation.

talk about exploitation. something doesn't sit right with you.

"so when we debate," wonwoo whispers, focused and oblivious. "you'll bring up this point in rebuttal to this. see how that works?"

you hum. "yeah."

"right. then for closing-"

you crash your head into the table with an obnoxiously loud slam. wonwoo flinches in his seat. the librarian narrows her beady eyes on the both of you.

"i think we'll get an a for this," you mutter. 

wonwoo looks at you, caps his pen, and leans back in his seat. 

the debate goes well. everything happens as anticipated. you're able to uphold the integrity of academic investigation. whatever that means. wonwoo doesn't interrupt you. the nuances of your arguments are spared sufficient time before their expiration. 

(he looks bored.)

but that all goes to hell when you realise the class gets to vote. you turn on wonwoo: did you know this?

he averts his eyes. a sure sign of guilt.

something gnaws inside of you, worse than that time when you found kimmy's concoction of green onions, dr pepper and baking soda. it was an infusion alright. but the smell left you retching for days on end. 

the worst thing is, you don't know why you feel this way now.

you don't know who won. everything happened in a blur and now you're stomping out of the hallway, tugging the zip of your bag close. wonwoo catches up. you walk faster.

"well, congrats," he says.

"take your congratulations and shove it up your ass," you bite back.

wonwoo holds his hands up. "what's wrong?"

you swivel to a stop, fixing him with a shrivelling glare. "leave me alone."

wonwoo backs off. you turn the corner and run for class.

-

wonwoo [1225]: hey are you alright? wonwoo [1227]: what's wrong? wonwoo [1232]: is it something i did? wonwoo [1240]: ?? wonwoo [1255]: i'm sorry? - "you look like shit," is the first thing kimmy says to you. "is it wonwoo?"

you stab at her fishball. "no."

she rolls her eyes. "i didn't hear anything when i was walking over from the north wing, so something's up."

"nothing's up."

kimmy shakes her head, placing his chopsticks down. "when you come running to my class crying, i think something's up."

you scowl at her. she winks back. and then rearranges her face to something more sombre. 

"did you guys..." she leans in. "break up?"

you swat at her. "what?"

chan slides into the seat next to her. "i've been summoned by the allusions to love."

kimmy shoves him. "just because you play love live doesn't mean shit."

to you, she says, "look. you have his number-"

"i have your number too."

she pinches your lips together. "shut up. you walk each other to the next class faithfully without fail-"

you swat her hand away. "that's because he's being a prick-"

"you have inside jokes that nobody else gets."

"that's the point of inside jokes."

kimmy squeezes your cheeks together this time. god, those hand grips are working. "when he's gone, people ask you where he is. after that debate, you came to me crying. and the best part is you let him steal your fries."

she releases her hold on you, allowing you the chance to breathe. and then immediately choke.

kimmy, satisfied, returns to eating.

"oh my god," you say, eyes wide. "oh."

"yeah," kimmy echoes, "oh."

the realisation does you no favours. "...he's off-limits. he's got a girlfriend."

chan finally detaches from his game. the whimsical sounds of squeaky little gems fade away as

he lets his character die. "what?"

"there was a girl in his room," you say.

kimmy rounds up on chan. "you never said anything."

"i didn't know!" chan protests, "i thought-"

he falls silent. you stuff your face with fries.

-

the rest of the week is horrible. you can't help but notice how wonwoo pulls out his phone, sighs, and replaces it in his pocket before shooting you looks. it sucks, really, to be so aware and want to not be. 

before you can pack up and leave, though, wonwoo strides over with his freakishly long legs. "saturday night."

you look at the pamphlet he's offering you. slam night. 

"please come," he says, exhaling slowly. "at least - consider it."

he leaves it in your hands, and bolts out of class. 

-

you hate that you're considering it. you hate that you're already here. you hate that you're still hoping. there's no reading between the lines because everything is so blurred and reckless and there is no way out of this. so here you are, sitting at the side, going to this slam because you've gone to all the other slams anyway.

"hey, you're wonwoo's friend," a girl says.

you look up. it's the girl with the red lip. "yeah."

she smiles, sitting down gracefully next to you. "that idiot said he'd be slamming."

maybe you should have gone home. out of all you'd expected from this evening, you didn't think sitting with your crush's girlfriend is one of them.

"maybe he's trying to impress someone," she continues, winking at you. "my brother can be so thick."

before you can ask her what she means, the emcee starts to welcome everyone to the event. you sit patiently, trying not to bounce your knee when the epitome of grace is right beside you.  the first few acts pass by without much enthusiasm. you shuffle in your seat. 

and then wonwoo comes up. there's polite applause as he scans the darkened crowd. he pauses in your direction, and smiles. you turn to his sister(?). she spares you an undecipherable look. 

"hello," he says into the microphone. "i'm wonwoo, and up till recently i was sceptical towards the fine art of slam poetry."

you snort. 

he continues, "but i've been converted, maybe, to see the beauty of paying tribute to the ancient origins of poetry. i'm not a poet, but shakespeare is, and he's pretty ancient as far as i know.

"so here's sonnet 130." 

[peterriven]

The Last Of Us Part 2 (spoilers ahead)

Seattle

So after Joel’s brutal death, Ellie decides to go to Seattle for revenge. To make a long story short, she goes along with Dina while Tommy has already left ahead of them. We learn later that Jesse tags along behind them. Dina is pregnant and Ellie takes down a few of the people who worked with Abby.

When they find Tommy he’s hurt but will survive. They just came back from Ellie finding and killing Owen and Mel. Of course Abby is there and shoots Jesse dead. Then threatens Tommy. Then we transition into Abby’s perspective. However, at this point I’m starting to get fed up. I never liked the fact that Ellie is looking for revenge when its bringing so much pain. 

Abby

When playing as Abby we learn that her father is the doctor we killed in the first game. We know why she went out to kill Joel. As we play as Abby we are supposed to bond with the characters we hunted down as Ellie. But i was too tired and fed up to care too much about them. Maybe I resented them too much for what they did in the beginning. Or maybe it was too much too fast. 

In Abby’s perspective we get caught by scars then get rescued by Yara and Lev. I actually started to care for these character later on. We help each other escape then leave them both as we go find Owen. But Abby’s conscious can’t leave them behind. They saved her life after all. So we go back and take them to the aquarium where Mel can help Yara with her arm. We have to cut it off it seems but we need supplies. So we go off to the WLF hospital to get it. Lev comes with us and we learn something interesting. The scars called him “Lilly”. I was confused and thought there was someone else, but its explained shortly after. After getting captured by our own men and having to escape to fight a monstrosity of a zombie. We get the supplies we need.

After fixing Yara up we talk and learn that Lev didn’t feel the same on the inside as he was supposed to. He didn’t want to be a wife to an elder and wanted to be a soldier. He shaved his head like the men and they wanted to kill him for that. It was seen very negatively. 

Lev runs off to his mother because he wants to bring her to Santa Fe. So we run after him. Yara is the only one to come with us. On the way there we meet Manny and end up getting attacked by a sniper. Making my way up to him I was frustrated because I’ve died a few times. When we finally corner him we go around to flank him. But he actually flanks us and kills Manny. I actually liked Manny so it sucked seeing another character die. However, i didn't feel too bad because of what he did. Abby gets away then gets into a scuffle with he sniper. In the small scene that played I noticed that the snipers hair was familiar. After thinking for a second I realized it was Tommy! I felt kinda dumb for not realizing it sooner. 

Anyways, we make it to the island while the WLF raid is about to hit. We make our way to Lev and find him in the corner. He had to kill his mother. She didn’t accept him as he was. I felt for the kid. But we had to get out of there and we got pretty far, But then we encounter Issac. And then Issac shoots Yara and she falls to the ground. Another character i liked dead. As Issac approaches Yara shoots him and we manage to escape. That actually surprised me. 

Abby and Lev get off the island and head to the aquarium then find the bodies. they also notice a map. The map Ellie dropped because she was freaking out over killing a pregnant lady. Then we are all caught up. Abby finds them kills Jesse and wounds Tommy. We still play as Abby fighting Ellie. 

I get what they were trying to do; make us care about 2 opposing characters but at that moment I didn’t care for Abby. I couldn’t forgive her.

Ellie

Abby wins the fight and almost kills Dina but Lev stops her. We then go into the future with Ellie and Dina living together. It was nice but Ellie has a flashback of Joel’s death and we relive it briefly. That incident really messed her up. I know i still felt the sadness of it all. 

Tommy comes to their home and tells Ellie that he knows where Abby might be. But she refuses to go after her. But in the end she goes in the middle of the night. She can’t live easy with all that’s happened. Even though she knows what Joel did to the fireflies, she still loves him. She says farewell to Dina and heads off. 

A short level plays out with Abby and we see her get captured. We continue as Ellie and make our way to find her. Ellie unfortunately gets stabbed by a tree pretty badly but still presses on. She gets to the camp and ends up finding Abby tied to a post in the beach. She cuts her down and seeing her scrawny and weak just made me feel bad for her. She was this powerful woman but now is kinda built like Ellie. It seems like Ellie let her go after seeing her like that because she doesn’t attack her ad Abby cuts down Lev and they head to some boats. As they each get into their own boat Ellie gets a flashback of Joel. I dreaded the fact that Ellie couldn’t let go. I didn’t like that we had to fight and get our revenge. But Ellie had to see it all through. During the fight Ellie gets her ring and pinky bit off but still manages to win and begins drowning Abby. Then she gets another small flashback of Joel and lets Abby go. 

I made a small connection in my brain when I first played as Abby and performed a stealth take down. She did it like how Joel did it in the first game. It was small but it was the start. Then Abby ends up taking care of Lev. We don’t see their journey but I assumed they became close like how Joel and Ellie did. Abby sort of became the new Joel in a weird twisted way. Abby would do anything to keep Lev safe, just like how Joel did for Ellie. 

Joel

Ellie makes her way back to her home. But its empty. She finds her guitar, but cant play it properly missing two fingers. It sucks how much she lost trying to get her revenge. We then get a cutscene where she is talking to Joel after the dance. And the fireflies incident comes up. Ellie claims that she should of died in the hospital so her life could mean something. But Joel argues that if he has a chance to go back in time to that moment, he would do it all over again. Joel puts his loved ones first. If he has to kill a whole settlement in the snow after being bedridden for a few months he will . Same goes for the hospital. I don’t think he would be able to live in a world where he had to give up another person he loves. I agree with him. I wouldn’t change anything he did.

Ellie ends up saying that she might not ever forgive him, but she wants to try. But soon after, she doesn’t really get the chance to. 

TLDR: Part 2 was a tragedy and im sad

[critgemhero]

All evidence that proves Shiro is a sleeper agent, and also a robot

OK EVERYONE I have some incredibly hard evidence regarding Shiro and his... “escape”. 

I think that this version of Shiro really thinks he is the real Shiro, but this is far from the truth.

His escape was all part of the plan. A plan to make sure he really believes that he is the real Shiro, and will behave like him as well. Every single part of it was set up so that the Galra and trick and track Voltron. That includes those 2 rebels. They were in on it. Read more below, it’s gonna be long.

Part 1: Where he wakes up, and how he escapes.

Shiro is LITERALLY on an experimentation table. That is not a good sign. He’s not being held captive for answers, he was being experimented on for probably months. But WHY? To find a way for Zarkon to get the Black Lion? Maybe, but how would the Galra have anyway of knowing that connection, the one that Zarkon and he share. I dont think that is it, it is much more sinister and mental.

Now think about WHERE he wakes up. It's the exact same place, or very similar, to where he was first captured at the start. This was intentional. These places are giving him flashbacks to these “memories”. If the plan was failing, or not ready yet, He may not have experienced those flashbacks, and they could have (or... HAVE) tried again to make a better Shiro.

Either way, he escapes. Not only that but while injured and with ease. And you know what? Its no wonder it was easy for him... they were PROGRAMMED ROBOTS TOO!!

Did you hear the noises that they made? Beeps and boops. when shooting and when killed. Listen to how this “guy” sounds when he’s punched square in the face. I wouldnt be surprised if those robots were failed earlier attempts at Shiro

These bots were set up so that no Galra were hurt or lost, but Shiro was disoriented or not knowledgeable enough to see they were fakes barely even trying. 

He is MEANT to escape this, meant to feel like he is in control but his life in danger. I mean... why was he even left alone without any CHAINS??

Part 2: Operation Kuron

Honestly for me, this is the most obvious one. He shouldn't be happy about this at all. What is this operation? He’s not saying the operation is failing, its UNDERWAY. This is never brought up again, and we are going to get those answers in S4. 

What is Operation Kuron? Well clearly its the process of testing out the Shiro Robots. Because he literally flashes back to it

He is a Subject of multiple numbers. Now why would that be? Do Galra really experiment that often? I mean they COULD, but they said this was specifically for Kuron. And when they are testing his response.... what do you hear? Robot noises when his pupil is dilating. What else is there to say.

PART 3: The fake rebels

Ok, so I know this one may be hard to swallow, but there's a shocking amount of layers to how these 2 were written to prove this.

When they first interrogate him, Shiro comes to the conclusion that they are rebel fighters. It was, well it made sense, but how odd that it lingered for that long. We assumed they already were based on their position on the planet and species, but the show clearly points that out to us. This is to make us completely unsuspicious

Next, let's see how they reacted to “The Blade of Malmora” 

How on EARTH would they know what that is?? If they claim not to understand Voltron, they would definitely not be aware of their new affiliates that were once a top secret organization. 

So this whole capture thing is a ruse to test Shiro’s knowledge of the Lion, his paladins, EVERYTHING he knows. Shiro has to explain all of the details in order for him to try and convince them. This is all but a test to see if he remembers properly, if his memory banks make sense and are accurate.

Then there is the fake “Intercept Voltron” message. The man who made that transmission was CLEARLY the same voice as this guy. Shiro was meant to hear that and try to find a way there. 

As for Shiro’s second escape? They probably knew that was coming as well. I mean, they might not have, but even so if anything went wrong I'm sure they have the button to pull the plug on him any second.

Then I think they fight over the gun on purpose. 

Remember, this guy was skilled enough to kill that giant crab thing no problem, but NOW?? He’s acting like a buffoon. This part is planned to give Shiro the opening.

Also, I'm taking note of how ODD it is the show keeps focusing on his leg injury. At one point it even lingered on it for over 2 seconds, it was ODD. Is this to reinforce to us and him that he feels pain? That his leg is meant to be “real” flesh?

Anyway, the final test was to reassure them he is on their side, by not hurting or killing them and affirming his allegiance to Voltron. I KNEW something was weird when they just.... SUDDENLY believed him? I know he didn't shoot them, but they really didn't seem to care and wanted to “eat” him remember? It happened to fast for me, because that's what they were supposed to do. Help him on to the ship.

And then there is THIS BEAUTIFUL EXCHANGE

um yeah... WHAT? At first I took this as he’s been hit in the face with his friends gun a bunch. But... why? Over arguments? I guess that's possible, but that's not it. Shiro said HE was sorry for hitting him in the face with his gun. Other Shiro’s probably did similar things, and this guy has gotten used to it. He probably doesn't even believe he’ll be a successful Shiro, since he said it won't be the last.

Oh and ummm. also this

yeah, what? He volunteered? for what exactly?? I thought you were a rebel stuck on this planet... He is not very good at his job is he. also 5 years??? I know Shiro gets back sooner than that, so it makes you wonder how often these robot things have been going on with everyone. Either that, or this is their first day, and the contract was to do this experiment for 5 years? either way, it was a weird thing to say. 

The last we see this two is the moment I knew something was finally up. At first, I took it as a stupid mistake on the writers part, but now it means so much more. And it's this final line.

Why on EARTH would the skinny guy be shocked by this? Why would the other dude ASK this? They have been on this planet for how long? Seemingly stuck?? There is NO WAY this would make sense. You know why? Because this is the first time a Shiro actually succeeded in leaving, and this was them realizing that their job was done and that the Galra didn't give them a ship to get away themselves. 

Not to mention the skinny guy... KNOWS all this stuff about the Galra ship defenses. That's because he is reading off what he was given by the Galra, and how the plan is supposed to go down.

We’re done with these 2 idiots, now to the next part.

Part 4: Back on the ship, seeing Voltron and the 1 week in space.

When he attacks the first guy, we see it’s clearly a robot again. When they arrive, the announcer’s voice is, AGAIN, similar to the guy who said the operation was underway.

Anyway, so they abort the launch. I think this is because it was another way to make sure it was SHIRO who was after Voltron, not any other ships caught up in the mix. Keep an easy eye on their test subject you know?

Ok, so now we are at a point where... I dont really have much to say here. He sees Voltron and goes after it. Im not sure what the Garla’s plan here was honestly. I guess they are still tracking him as a robot, but how did they know he would find Voltron? My best guess is that at a certain point, they would have him set off a signal that would.. REACH the black lion somehow?? Which is odd, because Black won't respond to him as the leader anymore.

If im completely honest here... this part sets back my theory a bit. Im sure there are explanations tho. 

I can bring us back to the 2 fake rebels again tho at the very end of Episode 5, because what is the joke supposed to BE exactly?

Why are they randomly happy over noodles? They have no way of knowing what happened to Shiro... oh wait, yes they do. They know that was their last day because the mission of getting Shiro to team Voltron was a success. this was a “job well done” kind of dinner indeed

Part 5: The return. 

Where do I even BEGIN to say how OFF Episode 6 felt?? The reunion scene... it's not as happy or relieving as it should be. At first, I thought it was him dealing with trauma, but it feels... a bit different from that. His eyes don’t even look the same anymore.

And then we have the BIGGEST piece of evidence of “WTF IS GOING ON” and that is of course... SHIRO’S HAIR

LIKE WHAT IS THIS MONSTROSITY. No but in all seriousness.. why didn't he shave the sides of his head?? Ok ok jokes aside. Did you see how... horribly stilted and lifeless the delivery of his first line here is?? It's almost... robotic. That's because it is.

Then of course there is this. Not much else to add to that.

And then another big WTF Moment. The Black Lion won’t respond to him.

Im sorry, but I call HUGE BULLSHIT on that. I KNOW Black picked a new partner, but if Keith was able to quickly take over for Shiro while he was in Trouble, im POSITIVE the man who formed an SUPER strong bond with it in the Space Mall episode can at least start to fly it a few months after being gone. This is where I really knew something was wrong, for sure.

I wont lie in saying that the rest of the episode he did act like the real Shiro, but remember, he was programmed to from probably the original Shiro. It has to be DECENT at being convincing. And its working.

I don't have much else, that's pretty much it. I know this is in crazy detail but I really think we are on to something here. I was FURIOUS that they brought back Shiro so soon, and how it would ruin team development and character dynamic... but that's the point, isn't it. To think everything will go back to normal, but in reality tear the team apart for the gain of the Galra. Its both sinister in the world of the show itself, and to its audience.

We want Shiro back safe and sound, and we were fooled just like team Voltron. For all we know, Shiro is dead. The biggest proof of that? ... What was the point of making Voltron regroup itself entirely to last for only a couple episodes?

No, this new team dynamic will stay, and Shiro’s missing story is long from over. 

[soprana-snap]

Magnolia Seven-Seven

Chapter One: Just Peachy

Summary: Magnolia is like every other city, full of traffic jams and hoards of people. When Captain Gajeel and Detectives Gray and Natsu get involved with a shady crime boss that seems to have the whole crime ring in his back pocket, they need a little more backup to bring him down: i.e ADA Lucy Heartfilia, Evidence Technician Levy McGarden, and Caffeinator Juvia Lockster.

Rating: M for adult situations and language

A/N: This is all Alisha’s fault. Blame @rivendell101 for this monstrosity. Buddycop!AU conceived after eating 22 Reese’s and no sleep...after how many months of not writing. 

Gray mentally promised to strangle whomever decided shove glitter and peppermints down this car’s dashboard vents. It wasn’t even hot out and yet the car smelled of mint and tiny rainbow glitter blinded him if he turned his head the wrong way.

Plus it made the dashboard look like a wayward unicorn shat all over.

Of course his captain got first pick of the undercover cars and of course he picked the coupe, leaving them with the SUV with the atomic glitter explosion all over. He wondered if there was regrets, anger, maybe bitter acceptance when the poor soul turned on the defrost and met his sparkled fate. At least the car forever smelled of peppermint, the candy caked into the bowels of the car for eternity. No amount of body odor or bad burritos can ever clear it. He turned the air conditioning to maximum.

“Batman can totally beat Aquaman. Remember he is the night AND a billionaire.”

Oh, right. Before his intense pondering of the dashboard, he and his partner had been in an intense debate.

Natsu Dragneel. Gray had no way to explain him properly. Who could? He supposed Natsu felt the same way about him, despite being rivals in the academy. Pink hair aside, the man had grit for an idiot. He was the only one Gray would trust with his back...and their captain too.

“Nah, Aquaman has Batman beat.”

Natsu tensed, flashing his signature ‘eat shit’ look. It was kinda like a constipated face, but with more rage in his brows. Honestly, how did he make Detective? He was a bag of half eaten, dusty Reese’s: useless to everybody and, with as much affection as Gray could muster, totally gross in theory.

“You know what Gajeel said. ‘Back up yer opinions’,” he said, mimicking Gajeel’s gruff tone. Huh, he even did the little lip curl characteristic common for Gajeel. “So, back your wrong opinion up.” He changed the A/C dial back to maximum heat.

Gray curled his lip and wrinkled his nose. Patience is key, he told himself. Plus, the captain would kill him if Natsu ended up dead before they could make the arrest. He tossed a glance to his left, toward the alley that was where everything was supposed to be.

“Well, Aquaman can control the animals in the ocean,” he tried, knowing full well it was a half baked answer. They were both getting antsy, like bloodhounds waiting for the trumpet to signal the hunt. He turned the A/C back to full cold. The unit within the dash gave a tired rumble, but held on.

Natsu rose an unimpressed eyebrow, but Gray caught the subtle glances towards the alley and the anxious leg bobbing. The car was starting to shake too from the increasing force, the leftover bottles and cans of 5-hour energy rolling too.

He mentally promised to strangle whomever used the car last. He didn’t miss the bags of fast food tossed into the back or the forgotten Taylor Swift CDs. Someone either had an open addiction to Tay Tay or was hiding the evidence of it. Either way, the car was a pig’s sty.

“And?” Natsu prompted, reaching over and turning the A/C dial back to maximum heat.

“He can drown trying to fight Aquaman.” ‘Duh’, he wanted to add, but when the captain was gone, he was in charge. Natsu had a nasty habit of playing disappear and bust the suspect alone if he wasn’t watched. The A/C was back to cold in a flash.

“Uh, billionaire? He can buy a submarine, go down and torpedo Aquaman, then eat whatever sushi he likes!” He then chuckled, “Batmarine.” When he turned the A/C to heat this time, there was a low clunk in the car.

Gray switched it back to cold before the unit could even scrape up enough warm air. “Aquaman can make a creature eat the sub--including Batman!” The inside voice was forgotten, the stir crazy pair now unleashed.

“Can not! Whatever it is can just poop him out! Plus, he can kill it from the inside!” Natsu argued, turning the dial back to heat. The car’s engine shuddered but still idled softly.

“Fine! The giant squid can crack it open like a pistachio and then Aquaman can feed Batman to an orca or shark! Baddabing, he’s dead!” At this, he turned the dial ruthlessly to cold and popped the plastic out of the socket, leaving just a metal stub. Suck it Natsu, he thought. Serves him right for leaving his weights out on the floor and making me and Gajeel clean them up, he added pridefully.

Natsu looked like he swallowed something foul, his eyes nearly crossing as he puffed his cheeks, probably choking on his defense but realizing it wasn’t good enough. Gray kinda hoped he choked so he could get a good laugh. He hastily dug into his breast pocket, pulling out his smartphone.

“And don't even think about Googling it,” he added sharply.

“...Fuck off, Gray.” Natsu decided after  scowling hard enough to make a squirrel lose its fur. The man crossed his arms, sticking out his bottom lip and turned away to stare angrily out the passenger window.

“That may work on Lucy, but I still think you are a loser.”

That earned him a solid punch in the shoulder that started an all out slapping fight. Hands were flying, slapping at anything in their path. If they were to lay low, it was too late now, the gloves were off.

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.

.

He had to have the largest fucking migraine on the continent at the moment. It was bad enough that he had to pretend he didn’t, but his two numskulls forgot they both were wearing microphones that dual transmitted right into his eardrum. It was safe to assume they weren’t listening to his relays either, judging by the constant shuffles and sounds of curses.

He could manage through their childish games: like Rock, Paper, Scissors and I spy. He could manage with the sounds of them chewing on whatever the hell they had in the car. He could even deal with their subpar debates on superheros. But this was total pain. Maybe he was hearing them all the way in the warehouse without the microphone!

“Shut up.” His own voice sounded raw from the irritation boiling through his body. He could hear them silence, the static crackling at their startled breaths. “Take this seriously.”

“Excuse me?”

Only years of experience with his old man prepared Gajeel for this. The straight face. The harsh growl in his demands. Weaker men have caved with less. Still....a theft trade bust was not the place to use these skills.

The brat looked like the damn wind could prance by and carry him away to the land of Oz or something, nothing but skin and bones with bruises as accents. Not one doubt entered his mind that this runt was high school age, a dropout most likely. Yet, his brown irises were shadowed with black eyes, his nose broken a few times too. A brawler beaten too many times by the world.

“I said shut up and take this seriously. I wanna buy your shit but I ain’t got the whole Bank of Magnolia.”

Nice save, Natsu praised in his ear.

Fuck off, peanut gallery, Gajeel answered in his mind. Honestly, when Makarov first assigned two upstart detectives under his command, he had his concerns. Now, it was headaches but whatever. If they messed up this bust they’ve been marking for weeks, he’d tan their hides himself.

The kid blinked, hesitation finally making an appearance on his face. Ah, so he did have some self preservation.

Time to switch tactics. Back to the basics, as he would tell the knuckleheads.

Before the runt could gather his bearings, Gajeel made his switch. He forwent diplomacy and straight into intimidation.

The kid’s coat felt like it hadn’t been washed in years, the fabric crinkling like tin foil. Something smelled nasty too, body odor soaked in skunk probably. He wished his nose would take a hike to spare him as he brought the kid near his face, flashing his teeth.

“Listen, I ain’t got all day and all the money in the world. So, I’ll make it simple. Point me to the procurer of these gizmos and I’ll leave ya be.” The way the kid shivered and his eyes shriveled in fear was nearly intoxicating.

Fear. The law of the world. At least, the underbelly of the world.

“Look man, I’m just doing what my boss says. I don’t want no trouble!” As if it would placate the situation, the kid showed his palms, empty and in surrender. Like him, Black Steel Gajeel would ever accept such a surrender.

“Do me the solid and point ‘im out for me.” The growl that came from his throat brought back memories, flashes of frightened eyes and darker days. “I don’t want a small fry like you but you’re making me late for an appointment.”

Intimidation.

Metalicana taught him this from day one, back when the path was so long and crooked. Of course, that was back then and he was different now: A changed man.

When the kid frantically gestured to his side, but subtle so that it looked like he just twitched, the glee melted away to cold self loathing in an instant. His grip relaxed, the boy’s feet touching back to concrete. Acid burned the back of his mouth. It had been months. He thought he had himself under control.

The academy didn’t beat it out of him after all.

“You need Wheaties,” he settled with, adjusting the flap of the hoodie with a gentle pat. “And an education.” Maybe some deodorant too.

“Huh?” Honestly, this kid’s brains was probably melted by the sheer stench of urine in this dump. Still, Gajeel breathed in and out. Zen. Levy always told him to find his happy place.

“Go back to school. There are better places to be than in this business, kid.” Jeez, what was he, the brat’s mentor? “Go back to school or I’ll find a way to tie a knot with yer scrawny legs.” There. Let it never be said that he wasn't a good motivator: this kid looked ready to faint from sheer inspiration.

Out of the corner of his eye, Gajeel saw him. Tall, dark, and suspicious with his head down and eyes avoiding everyone in the warehouse. His hands fiddled within his pockets, an unlit cigarette resting on his lips. Typical asshole type.

Now, he had no tip on the big man behind the job, but this guy definitely looked the type. Plus, every few seconds, the guy looked around, nodding to a few cronies handling crates and boxes.

It had taken months to set this little raid up, even longer to learn that there was seismic activity on the streets. More drug busts, more thefts, more violence in general. Magnolia wasn’t that happy little city portrayed on the sun bleached welcome signs, but then again if the tourists fell for that little charade, shame on them.

But, this was his town, Levy’s town, his partner’s town. They’d be damned if they let some high horse punks try and run these streets outside the law. As Captain of the detective unit, Gajeel could proudly state he was going to mow these criminal’s asses like grass.

Still, his two knuckleheads were whispering on the mic now, stray words Gajeel was able to catch. “Poor guy...sad...appointment...stood up.”

Idiots. He used to flush the heads of morons like them in the toilets and then steal the lunch money they stole from somebody else. What was it called again? The social food chain?

It was then that the rays of understanding dawned on the undercover cop. He was still standing there, next to a kid about to wet his pants and break out in stress acne. The job was supposed to be inconspicuous, blending, and eventually cracking down. Yet, here he was daydreaming.

He left the pale kid behind, strolling along the stacks of crates stamped with different cities and countries, bold black ink on the wood grains. Cedar, Crocus, and even Balsam? Just where and who is pulling the strings to this size of an operation? Definitely not Captain Crunch over there. No real boss ever wore aviators from the Dollar Tree...the tag still on.

At that moment, time slowed, and their eyes met momentarily.

Levy always talked about those sappy books she tried to hide from her supervisor on the job. The ones where two main characters eyes lock and time slows, butterflies began to flutter in the stomach and a little thing called love at first sight took flight.

Well, first, this was a two take on the punk’s side. He looked at Gajeel, looked back down, and jerked his head back up to gape.

Second, the butterflies in Gajeel’s stomach were on fire and armored with iron steampunk spikes, chanting war cries as they sent the molten metal through his limbs as he felt the instinctual urge to surge into chase. They were blood thirsty, manly little butterflies.

Third, there was no love taking flight at first sight. It was Gajeel’s suspect taking flight at second glance, barreling through the warehouse like Levy did when she saw a spider.

Chicken, Gajeel thought as he swore, bolting after the guy with a few seconds lag.

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“Okay, for the final one hundred points, and the honor of skipping dish duty for a week-” Gray said, beginning his drum roll of fingers on the dashboard, “-Natsu, you must partake in the Trial of Tenacity!”

Natsu grinned brightly, punching into his palm. “All my training has led up to this moment. Witness me!”

“Witnessed,” Gray agreed, unable to stop the smirk from cracking his face.

With that, Natsu inhaled deeply, puffing his chest out and tightening his belly. Then, he began to belch. “A, B, C, D-” he paused. “E,” he faltered, licking his lips and scowling at the parking meter outside. “F, G, H, I-”

“Idiots!” Gajeel’s voice crackled over the mic, “I got a runner!”

“Oh shi-” Gray hissed, fumbling with the door handle. He was also going to strangle whoever put a ‘purrr-fect’ sticker on the car’s handle. What were they, five and playing pretend cops n’ robbers?

Natsu was already on it, throwing his door open and lunging out with it. Too bad he didn’t account for the light pole next to the car. The noise of the door hitting the wooden pole was enough to make someone cringe, but the sound of Natsu’s forehead smacking into the window as a result was hilarious.

Gray almost peed himself as he stumbled, nearly tripping on the sidewalk at the noise. It was a shame. He expected a hollow thunk.

Disappointment aside, the solid burn of his previously cramped legs leaving trails of fire. It took about three strides to get momentum, but then Gray felt everything click.

Running wasn't really his thing. It never was until he joined the force. To be honest, Gray missed his high school days on the winter sports teams: skiing, snowboarding, ice skating, those kinds of things.

          But, he hid the trophies for the ice skating in storage. Heaven forbid his partners finding out, even if he was graceful as fuck on ice skates.

          “I'm coming around the back! He's gonna shoot out the east alleyway,” Gajeel’s voice cracked in the earpiece.

          Which way was East? Which way was North? Dread filled his lungs. Never eat soggy wheat, but which direction was never!?

“Turn right at the crosswalk, icicle!”

          There was Natsu, finally up and sprinting along with him. It didn't surprise him in the slightest.      

          Unlike him, Natsu was a track star before the force, a competitive force of nature that tended to be too competitive at times. Times like, but not limited to, taking the longest shower even when the hot water was exhausted.

          “How's the head?” Gray managed to say between breaths, taking his turn too soon and scraping his shoulder on the corner of the brick building. Ouch. “Still have a brain?”

          “Har Har. Just keep up, will ya?” Natsu replied, far more casual than he normally would. This was suspicious until he pulled ahead in a full sprint, feet barely staying on the ground for two seconds.

Gray would have been impressed...if it wasn't for the words Natsu was grunting into the mic as he went.

“Dude, is that the lyrics from Cops?”

Bad boys, bad boys...it was!

“Shut up! It makes me run faster!” Indeed, he was pulling ahead.

“Oi, morons! Here he comes!”

Instantly,  a pair of plastic garbage bins tumbled out of the mouth of an alleyway to the right, sounds of shattering glass making a few pedestrians freeze. Then, out came the ugliest looking man Gray had seen in living memory.

White hair tangled in knots, skin leathery and eyes sunken in, an old man staggered over the rolling bins, took one look at them, and sprinted away with inhuman speed.

“What drugs is he on?” Natsu squawked, nearly tripping over the cans himself as he hurdled over them.

“Catch him and we’ll find out!” Gajeel hissed, sounding much more out of breath than they were. They warned him about skipping cardio day, but did he listen? Nooo.

Not that Natsu or himself would ever draw attention to the captain's lack of stamina. A laugh caught in his throat. Especially around Levy.

Old Man Nasty could run! Gray had a hard time believing that he made it down two blocks before they were halfway gaining on him.

Well, he made it harder by throwing people and garbage cans in their paths. Gray had already caught up with Natsu, neck and neck as they closed in.

They may have ran over a little old lady with a cane, everything was a blur so he wouldn't remember.

It took five blocks, but Old Man was still an old man. Gray took the lunge just as Natsu did, both tackling the guy so hard they crashed right into a wooden fruit stand.

“Ehey what are ya’ll doin’ tuh my peaches?!” someone shouted near Natsu’s ear. Of course, he was sort of busy wrangling their suspect down while Gray recited the Miranda Rights with handcuffs.

That was how Gajeel found them, knelt and covered in mashed peaches with an irate vendor screaming like an angered TV star. Maybe he was going to explode judging by the color of his face. He didn't want to risk watching to see if he did.

It became sort of a ritual after every bust. The Captain sighed, flashed his detectives a ‘we will discuss this later’ look, and forked over a wad of twenties from his pockets to silence the vendor before his migraine became nuclear.

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Magnolia 77th precinct wasn't a glamorous place. The drywall was at least 49 years old, the tiles discolored from various cleaning supplies, the ceiling missing squares. It smelled like an old building, and it was. There were still secret closets from back in the prohibition era although they weren't used for illegal booze anymore.

           Magnolia 77 wasn't pretty, it probably had some modern day code violations, but it was home. Natsu had always thought so. He crashed at his desk sometimes, ate meals from the vending machine, and shaved in the gym showers. By all accounts, that meant he lived here.

          So, bringing in baddies to this ‘temple’ always gave him a sour taste in his mouth. Or, it could be the peach juice still oozing from his hair.

           Erigor, the guy he and Gray suffered much pain and embarrassment to catch, seemed indifferent to the majesty of the lobby. Actually, he turned up his nose, revealing the bit of peach still lodged up there in the left bat cave. No respect for poor historical building upkeep. Criminals these days.

          Gray held onto Erigor’s left arm, Natsu keeping tight on the right while Gajeel brought up the rear. It made this six legged, sideways cha cha line hard to fit through the revolving door, but with a little wiggling and sliding real smooth, they all ended up in the lobby in one piece, just peachy.

          Then, when Natsu got a good look around, gravity faltered for just a moment. His mouth went dry, his heart thumping against his rib cage. For a blink, the Earth stopped turning.

          Be still his heart.

There she was, in that white blouse and gray pencil skirt, a purple scarf around her neck today. Her arms were filled with folders, a briefcase slung by a strap over her shoulder.

          She rose a golden eyebrow, an amused smirk crossing her glossed lips, “Wow. I see you boys got into a sticky situation.”

          Damn, her quick quips never stopped taking his breath away.

           Gajeel grunted, taking a moment to scoop some slime from the back of Gray’s uniform and flicked it at her playfully.

           She dodged quickly, standing aside as the captain took Erigor from them and made the march up to the counter.

          “This is no time for puns, Lucy...even good ones.” Gray said as he shook his arm and slopped peach guts all over the floor.

          Natsu, however, pulled a half squashed peach from his trouser pocket, grinning stupidly as he offered it to her. “Sweets to the sweetie.”

          Lucy, bless her, managed a small hint of amusement under her cringe. She pulled the folders close to her chest and Natsu felt unreasonable envy of the plastic and cardboard.

          “Never been a fan of peaches, sorry.” She glanced down, probably to inspect that her shoes were not stepping in juice, missing Natsu’s deflated look.

          “Well, I should get back to my office. Bye Gray...Natsu.” With a dainty hand, she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, walking away with her head bowed and eyes to the floor in determination.

          Assistant Deputy Attorney Lucy Heartfilia, someone that everyone loved to see around the precinct and every criminal learned to fear in the courts.

          Once she was gone, Gray whistled lowly, placing a solemn hand on Natsu’s shoulder. “Sorry man. I think she only has love for justice and platonic relationships. You might not get anywhere with her.”

Natsu, still watching the doors where Lucy was last seen, closed his eyes and let a small smile cross his lips. With a steady hand, he slid the peach back into his pocket, ignoring the way it squelched. “Nah man. She has a lot of love to give but a lot to lose too. She’s worth waiting for,” he said softly, almost sagely as he tenderly sighed towards the doors.

Gray crinkled his nose. Over the years, Natsu was always a conundrum. One second he’s sappy and pretty damn perceptive, the next-

“Hey, wanna stick dirty socks in Elfman’s locker? He still hasn’t changed the locks~”

-the next, he was an absolute asshole.

“Sure, I got some that I’ve been perfecting for weeks.”

Hey, he never claimed to be a saint either!

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“Another job well done, Redfox.”

Gajeel couldn’t help but let the grin cross his face as he shoved Erigor to Erza and Milliana, the best detention officers on the force, nearly laughing at Erigor’s stumble into the women’s hands. Truly, he had no beef being on the streets, little wimp.

“Milli, take him to the cells while I talk with Redfox.” Erza said evenly, in that commanding tone that was a basic being for her. Her red hair shimmered behind her as she turned, pressing the buzzer that unlocked the door to proceed further into the building. Milliana, gripping Erigor by the arm, hustled him through and disappeared behind barred windows.

“The chief and I are very impressed with your record lately. Although, we do have concerns about the two greenie detectives you cart around with you. Somehow, you get the job done despite being saddled with hooligans,”  she said dismissively, eyes sharp as she took in the peach mush on the floor and still smeared on his vest.

The praise and backhanded snub at his team rolled off his back like water on a poncho, him not having the energy to get riled up in defense of his two rookies. After all, they did smear him in peach juice today.

“They were top notch in the academy, prodigies, hence achieving detective as soon as they entered the force. They are both excellent in hand to hand combat and sharp strategists. I wouldn’t expect someone outside this team to see it.” Okay, maybe the insults to his guys didn't go over as easily as water off his back. They were his morons, after all.

Erza, despite the rumor that she’d rip out your spine if you got snippy with her, smiled easily with a shrug. “As expected of the greatest team on the force, the Captain defends his team.” She sounded strangely pleased, as if he had passed a test of hers.

When her expression slipped into something more sly, then Gajeel felt nervous and twitchy. Sly Erza was worse than angry Erza.

“So...still coming over on Tuesday? With the skillet-?”

Oh. NO. Channeling his inner five year-old, he whipped his finger to his lip and shushed her. “Yer sworn to secrecy, Red. Remember?”

At his old academy nickname for her, she smirked. “Of course, Steel,” she replied easily.

He relaxed, opting to roll his shoulders out and groan at the cracks of the joints. “Well, I’m gonna round up my clowns and head out for the day. Maybe get them some shawarma. They did get the peach bomb worse than I did.”

She nodded, already turning away with a wave. “Alright, keep your phone on. We still have to book this guy on something that will stick.”

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“Erigor’s down. Got busted by the cops.”

A man runs his fingers through his hair. “This news is very displeasing.”

With a bored manner, he picked at his shredded cuticles, licking his lips. “Then tell Lyon I expect his shipment on time. Remind him what will happen if my calendar suffers another...setback.”

The chair he sat in creaked as he shifted, shined shoes coming up to rest on a nearby desk.

“Which reminds me...take care of the loose end before he gets...chatty.”

[luffysfakebeard]

hi!! i don't know if you're taking prompts (so if you're not, ignore this!!) but i saw a text post a trillion years ago that was like "imagine your otp meeting in a 7am lecture and one of them is pouring redbull into their coffee and looks straight at the other and says 'im going to die' and just drinks the whole thing" and ever since i started watching skam this reminded me of something isak would definitely do. aaaanywayyy, i love your fics, keep writing and being awesome!

The Study Buddy; 2070 words[AO3]

It was Even’s firm belief that whoever scheduled a guest speakerat 7.15AM on a Monday deserved to have hellfire rain down upon them.  Hewasn’t even sure why he said he’d go; when one of his lecturer’s the previousThursday had told the class that there was a speaker on Monday that they mightfind interesting Even had made a note of it even though it was optional.

Maybe he was losing his mind.  He had chosen to go to a 7.15 talk.

He couldn’t even remember what the lecturer had said it was about; just that it could be interestingand might help some of them gain some insight for their film projects.  That had probably been what pushed him to go,because as much as Even loves his eight hours of sleep he wanted his film to beperfect more.

When Even walked into the lecture hall at almost 7.10 there wereabout a dozen students scattered around, which was honestly more than he wasexpecting to see.  He chose a seatsomewhere in the middle and slumped down, quickly biting the inside of hischeek to silence the whine he wanted to let out.

The plastic chair was Baltic.  Despite it being mid-November – in Norway– he was pretty sure that the heating wasn’t on yet.  The pipes were creaking and groaning, though,and he realised that the heating was probably only just coming on now to get upto a pleasant temperature at 8AM when normal lecture times start.

Great.  The guy in here after me will probably betoasty warm while I’ll be a fucking ice sculpture, Even thought sullenly. He was pretty sure he could feel his lips pushing into a grumpy pout asthe cold from the chair seeped through his clothes and bit at his skin.

He put his travel mug down on the floor and struggled out of hismittens – it was cold, alright? and everyoneknows that mittens are warmer than gloves Even will defend his mittens with hisdying breath – and was just getting his notepad out when he saw him.

Him being a completely frazzled looking student – maybe a year ortwo Even’s junior – stumbling through the door. He looked like he was wearing about ten layers underneath his huge coat,and Even could see snow caught in the fold of his beanie.  Like most of the students there the boy camein armed with coffee; his hands – which looked snug as fuck in a pair of mittens, Even noticed – were clutching onto alarge take away cup from the nearby coffee shop as if it was the only thingtethering him to reality.

Even picked up his travel mug and took a sip as he watched theboy stumble into a seat and flop down onto it like a dead fish.  And wow, Even had thought he was bad at mornings.  There were probably corpses that woke upbetter than this kid.

Although he doubted any corpse was as pretty as this boy.

Even felt blessed to have seen such a pretty face.  He didn’t feel quite so salty about this bloody early morning guest speaker now.

He watched with interest as the boy set his coffee downreluctantly and wiggled some layers off. Even counted a coat, a scarf, the mittens, and a bulky jumper before theboy decided that was quite enough outwear to remove.  The boy was left in a big hoodie that Evenwas sure was soft as fuck to the touch and probably concealed three more shirts underneath.

The angel clearly felt the cold.

Even empathised.  His asswas already numb from his stupid frozen chair and he’d barely been in it twominutes.  He took another pull from hiscoffee to try to warm himself up from the inside out before the speaker showedup and he’d be expected to concentrate and take notes and all that bullshitrequired of students.

And, okay, the thing is…Evendidn’t mean to watch the kid.  It’s just that he was sat directly in Even’s line of sight and hisface was so pretty that Even just couldn’t bring himself to look around at theother bland exhausted faces in the room or pretend to try to read the leaflets onthe pin board.

So when the guy proceeded to pull a huge can of Red Bull out of his snow dusted backpack it wasn’t likeEven could look away.  He watched as theguy popped the lid off his take away cup and immediately the smell of strongcoffee permeated the air.

Even perked up a little just from the smell.  He drank a little bit more of his own coffee,but what the boy did next made Even freeze in place.

Even watched in horror as the kid cracked open the Red Bull,took a few long pulls from his coffee to make room in the mug, and then pouredthe entirety of the energy drink into his coffee.  He put the lid back on his cup and swirled itaround a little.

It was then that the boy glanced around.

And, of course, he caught Even staring straight at him with a horrifiedlook in his eyes and his lips still around his travel mug.

“I’m probably gonna die. But who wants to live at this time in the morning anyway?” The kidshrugged.  And then, in what Even couldonly assume was a power move to assert his dominance, the kid drank the entirecontents of the large cup while maintaining eye contact with Even who was stillparalysed with shock.

It was only when the kid finished his poisonous concoction andturned his back on Even that Even regained control over his body.  He lowered his mug away from his mouth, forsome reason put off the idea of caffeine completely.  He wasn’t a massive caffeine consumer ingeneral; he was pretty sure his skin was buzzing just from watching that kid neck so much caffeine at once.

It was one of the most disgusting things Even had ever seen.

He’d worked as a barista throughout secondary school and knew hewas a bit of a coffee snob because of it, but the kid’s blatant disregard forhis coffee offended some part of Even purely on principle.

But fuck if he couldn’t stop thinking about it or watching thatboy.  The guest speaker came in and Evenbarely noticed.  All of his attention wason the caffeine addict a few rows ahead of him.

Much to his surprise, the kid didn’t drop dead of a massive heartattack.  In fact, the kid was morefocused than Even was; he was watching the speaker and taking notes and noddinga little every now and then.

Even, on the other hand, wasn’t listening to a thing the speakerwas saying because he was transfixed by a curl of golden hair that had escapedfrom under the back of the boy’s beanie.

Curiosity was killing him.

The more he looked at the boy, the more he wanted to know.  Did he have no taste buds?  How tired do you have to be to combine coffeeand Red Bull?  What makes you even consider combining those things?  What was his name?  What was he studying that could be relevantto the guest speaker?  Why had Even notnoticed him around when he looked like an angel?  How had he not blinked once while he made eyecontact with Even and drank that monstrosity?

Even needed answers,dammit!

It was only when the boy slouched down to grab his backpack andthen stood up that Even realised the talk was over.

And he hadn’t heard a single word of it.

At that moment he realised a few things in quick succession.

1.      He got up at 6AM to listen to a guest speaker and instead ogledthe back of a pretty boy’s head for 90 minutes

2.      He had nothing to show for the last 90 minutes of his life.  No notes, no photos of the board on hisphone, nothing.

3.      He needed to do something fastto make it look like he’d actually been paying attention to that talk becausethe boy was looking over his shoulder and Even still had his blank notebook onhis lap.

4.      Impossibly, the boy looked even prettier from the front.

Even slammed his notebook shut and practically threw it into hisbag, almost knocking his half full travel mug over in his haste.  He grabbed the mug as it wobbled beforegetting to his feet, swinging his backpack over one shoulder and stretching hisback.  An hour and a half in the chairfrom hell hadn’t done him any favours he thought as his spine cracked andpopped.

He chanced a glance over at the boy as he finished his stretchand was surprised to find amused hazel eyes staring directly at him.

“Yes?” Even quirked an eyebrow.

“You know I could feel you staring holes through my skull thewhole time, right?” The boy raised an eyebrow right back.

Well.

Fuck.

Even had no idea how to respond to that.

“Aren’t you going to ask my name or something?” The boy promptedand Even’s brain finally caught up with him.

“I normally ask interesting people out for coffee, but I thinkyou’ve had enough caffeine for a week.” He replied smoothly.  Satisfaction welled up in his chest at thepink blush that dusted the boy’s pale cheeks.

“So is this you notasking me out?” There was definitely a little tinge of disappointment in theboy’s voice, Even was sure of it.

“This is me saying that if you have any more caffeine you willprobably die.  How about breakfastinstead?” Even smiled his best smile.  Hewasn’t blind; he knew he ticked a lot of the boxes of ‘how to be good lookingin the west’ and he wasn’t afraid to use that to his advantage if the situationcalled for it.

And getting to know a cute boy definitely called for it.

“Breakfast sounds good.” The kid smirked.  “You probably owe me a meal after all thatstaring.” He added casually as he turned away and walked towards the door.

“You started it!” Even protested as he followed him out into thecrisp cool morning.

“You were already staring at me when I looked around actually.”The boy looked so fucking smug.  Theworst part was that Even couldn’t even argue, because it was true.

He had been looking at the kid since he walked through the door.

“Are you going to tell me your name or what?” Even huffed.  He knew he sounded grumpy, like a sore loser,but the kid just laughed.

“Isak.  I’m Isak.  And you? What name should I be putting on my sexual harassment report?” Isakteased.

“Seriously?  It was earlyand I was tired and there was a pretty boy, I just sort of zoned out and youwere right in front of me.” Even grumbled. He was still turning the name over in his head; desperate to roll itaround his mouth and see how it tasted.

“Do you stare at allthe pretty boys for an hour and a half?”

“Only the reallypretty ones.” Even winked, taking pleasure in the way Isak flushed all the wayup to the tips of his ears.  He hadn’tput his beanie back on and snow was drifting into his hair.  He looked like a renaissance painting.

“Come on then, I’ve told you my name.  Who are you, huh?” Isak prompted and Evenshot a cheeky grin over at him.

“Even.  Even Bech Næsheim.  Your future boyfriend.”

“Wow.” Isak snorted.  “Ican’t tell if my heart’s beating so fast from the caffeine or from your totallyromantic introduction.” He rolled his hazel eyes and Even swore he fell alittle bit in love with this sassy boy there and then.

“Hey, if you have a heart attack at breakfast we’ll probably getit for free.” Even winked.

“I can already feel my heart outside of my body; let’s not jinxit, hmm?”

“I still can’t believe you drank that in one go.” Even shook hishead in disbelief, pushing the café door open and letting Isak in.

“I call it the Study Buddy.”

“You’ve done that more than once?!”