#did i have the big c word??? did i catch the plague ??

[erebius-moved]

made it thru a work shift today with only TWO coughing fits so i think im human again SKJDHFLKSDJ 8 hour later shift tomorrow so no activity yet but victor conley is in my thoughts

[souglias]

I see there's still a slot left for foul legacy: raging tide so I hope I'm not too late to request something 👀

Three things about me:

As I said in my other ask, I love to draw and write and I try to do that as much as I can during my free time between hw and class. Although it's been much harder to find time during college and I am often plagued with art/ writer's block 😔

I'm a bio major and I have no problem with handling bugs and other little critters that most people get queasy about. Once you've dissected sheep brains and whole squids, grabbing a spider isn't such a big deal lol

It generally takes me a while to start seeing someone as a close friend rather than a friendly acquaintance that I sometimes see in class. In the same vein it also takes me a while to begin considering someone as a possible romantic partner bc I only start to feel attraction after I've known them for a while and established an emotional connection

I'm a big fan of the star student/delinquent trope and even though I'm not really the type that only cares about studying, I do generally prioritize that over other things

Thank you in advance!! I can't wait to see the rest of this event unfold :D

The Delinquent [Childe]

c/w: mentions and implications of rumours, implication of bad school culture, Biology dissection (not described in detail)

Note: Hello!! I'm so so sorry this fic took so long! I wasn't particularly inspired for this fic so I was holding it off, then school came in the way for quite a bit. I don't know much about dissections, but I did a quick Google search and I hope I've written it such that it's not too difficult to believe. I hope that you enjoy this!

word count: 1.5k

--

Sun and moon. Both you and Childe live worlds apart. The two of you are only in each other’s orbit, seeing each other from a distance. The closest that you’ll ever get is being a few seats away in biology class. However, even though you only share one class with him, you know him all too well.

Childe is the infamous sporty kid in school. He’s also one who often wins academic competitions for the school. The student body doesn’t necessarily dislike him either. In fact, the girls adore him. They think that he’s hot and charming. But outside of his friend group, everyone is mostly too intimidated by his aura to approach him. 

You can also always count on Childe to constantly talk back to teachers and staff. Now and then, you would catch him breaking school rules by exploiting their loopholes. The school hasn’t expelled him, given that he’s not causing harm or trouble to anyone. On top of that, he largely excels in many areas. Though… There are rumours of him beating other students up. But no one has actually seen him do so.

You, on the other hand, keep to your group of friends. That’s how you decided you were going to spend the rest of your school life. Comfortable with a group of friends that you cherish deeply, out of the spotlight. 

That is until Childe decides to collide into your world for a reason you cannot bring yourself to turn down. Okay, you could have, but you don't dare to.

As a short breather from studying in the library, you doodle a little. Childe walks up to your side while you’re doing so. 

With a volume lower than usual, he greets you. “Hey, [name]- Oh these look pretty cute.”

You dropped your pencil on your notebook, taken aback that the Childe is talking to you. 

“What’s up, Childe?” you ask as your hand subtly shifts above the doodles in your notebook. Honestly, you want nothing to do with him. But, at the same time, you are courteous enough not to shut someone out the first time they speak to you.

He smiles sheepishly as he requests, “Sorry to bother you, but could you give me a demonstration on the dissection of a sheep’s brain?”

You only blink at him in response. You asked him to repeat, making sure you didn’t mishear him. Assuming you couldn’t hear him, he raises his volume. Only slightly, so as not to disturb other students. 

“I need some help on dissecting a sheep’s brain and I’d like you to show me a demonstration. Would that be okay for you?”

Fumbling over your words a little, you agree to help him with his dissection. “Great! Thank you so much, [name]. Will tomorrow after our biology lesson be good?”

“Yeah, sure…”

With that, he walks off with a slight skip in his steps. But you, on the other hand, are highly preoccupied with your thoughts. You think you got a little too nervous around him. They say you shouldn’t show fear in front of what you are afraid of. Wait, since when were you afraid of him?

On top of that worry, you aren’t sure if you should be proud that Childe thinks highly enough of you to ask you for help, or if you should be concerned that you are now responsible for tutoring the infamous school delinquent instead. 

Do you really know the dissection like the back of your hand? What if he asks you about the details that you've thrown to the back of your mind? As an extra precaution, you start to relook at your notes on the dissection. Before you sleep at night, you give your notes one last read too.

The next day, you realise during lessons that you forgot to check if there was a supervising teacher present after school. For students to use the laboratory after school, there is a rule stating that a teacher has to be present. Childe probably wouldn’t heed that rule in normal circumstances. But since your last lesson is Biology in the laboratory with him, your teacher would definitely know both of you are staying back. If there was no one around, your teacher wouldn’t permit you two to use the room and kick the both of you out. 

So, you pray. You pray that there wouldn’t be any supervising teacher, so you’d get to slip out on Childe. But unfortunately, when class ends, you find out that your teacher is on duty today.

Sighing internally, you resign yourself to helping Childe. As you prepare your workbench, you catch your teacher's eyes darting between the two of you. Likely surprised that both of you speak to each other, you suppose. You'd be surprised too.

When all the preparation is done, you try to hide your disappointment and ask, “So, how do you want me to teach this to you?” 

“You can do a step-by-step demonstration, then I’ll try to follow along.”

After every step, you check on the steps that he executes. While doing so, you notice how slender his hands are and the little faded scars on them. 

“[Name]? We can continue.”

You snap out of your daze and mutter an apology, continuing the dissection. At some point, you stop him. “Hold on, you’re about to cut the wrong part.”

He shifts his gaze over to your scalpel, trying to assess the exact point to cut. Before he does anything, you move over to his side as you always do when you teach your friends. You wrap your hand around his that holds the scalpel and you guide his hand.

Childe becomes momentarily distracted by your touch on his. He tries to ignore the feeling of his skin tingling and regain his focus. 

(But it is for nought because all he can think of is how cool you are for being so good at Biology. Heck, not just Biology, but other subjects too. Words of your consistently stellar grades don’t escape him.)

You only realise the proximity between the two of you after you let go of his hand. Taking a step back, your leg bumps into the stool. You stumble for a bit. Childe’s hand reaches out to your arm and it hovers right above your skin, ready to catch you. But you don’t fall and a few moments pass.

Inside, you beat yourself up a little for almost falling onto the ground in front of someone you’ve barely spoken to before. You straighten yourself and Childe withdraws his hand back to his side. 

You clear your throat in an attempt to dissipate the tension in the air. “There’s only one more step left to go. I can show that to you and if you’re good, we can pack up.”

You note how hot your face feels and hope he doesn’t tell this to his friend circle. You don’t particularly like them, given the amount of drama they attract. 

You try to concentrate, though the incident earlier remains at the front of your mind. Soon, he ends the procedure without a hitch, so you assume that you’ve taught him the right step despite your lack of focus. With that, both of you clean up the workbench. 

Childe finishes cleaning up faster than you. He always packs up quickly after class, and you chalk up his speed to his desire to leave class early. You think he’s about to leave when he comes over to help you. When he does, he thanks you.

“Thanks for the tutoring session, [name].”

A few seconds of silence lapse. You’re not sure if you should thank him for helping you. But before you say anything, he asks, “Say��� could I ask you for more help next time? I struggle quite a bit with Biology.”

Immediately, you nod. It'll just be more tutoring sessions that'll benefit you too. Though, you ask, “Don’t you have friends who do Biology?”

Childe’s face sours a little, a smile still plastered on his face. He whispers, “Let’s just say that while I do hang out with them, I don’t like to stay around them more than I need to.”

Your eyes widen slightly. The two of you have more in common than you thought.

As the two of you walk down the hallways to the exit, he exchanges contacts with you. Childe does a tiny fist pump in the air. “Nice! Now, we can easily arrange study sessions!”

He turns to look at you and offers, “If you need anything too, you can always ask me!”

Childe flashes you a smile. He’s really not so bad.

When the two of you part ways at the school gate, you wave to him. He returns one with that annoyingly vibrant smile of his. But, maybe you could get used to this.

Only then do you realise, oh, you are in so much danger. The moon is reaching its orbit closest to the sun now.

--

All likes and reblogs are appreciated! Thank you <3

[sergeantbuckybarnes]

everything i wanted // bucky barnes

Summary: Bucky asks you to pick Rebecca from school, as you spend the day with her, you can’t help to think that this is what you want, for the rest of your life.

Pairing: Chubby!Bucky x Reader (Single Parent AU)

Word count: 1.4k

Warnings: fluff, so much fluff

A/N: As always, remember English is not my first language. Also, thanks to @coffee-books-music​ for proofreading this!

You can consider this as a part two of begin again.

And tagging @buckys-estrella​ because you asked me to!

divider by @firefly-graphics​

wanna be added to my permanent taglist? here

main masterlist

You were in front of the Brooklyn Elementary School waiting for Rebecca, your boyfriend’s daughter. Bucky had called you and told you that something came up at the workshop and he couldn’t pick Becca from school, so he asked you if you could do it. You didn’t mind, you and Bucky had been dating for a while now, since the day you saw him at the diner waiting for a date that never showed up and you decided to be his date instead everything had been perfect.

You met Rebecca a couple of months later. At first, you were nervous, thoughts of her not liking you plagued your mind but Bucky always reassured you that she was going to love you. And he was right. The little girl was delighted with you.

The three of you did a lot of things together, you went to the zoo, to the movies… Bucky couldn’t help himself think that this is how things should have been with Dot. He knew he was a good father and Rebecca loved him a lot but he also knew his little girl needed a mother figure, that’s why he kept going on those dates. He couldn’t believe how lucky he was to have met you, someone that not only loved him but loved his daughter too.

The bell sounded, announcing the end of the classes for the day. They pushed the front doors of the building open, and you observed kids running out, excited that school was finally over. Your eyes caught the little brunette, she was peacefully walking with a blonde kid beside her.

“Becca!” you tried to catch her attention when you saw she was looking around looking for her father. When her eyes landed on you, a big smile grew on her face.

“Who’s that, Bec?” asked the boy who was still beside her.

“That’s my mom,” Rebecca replied, and with that she ran towards you without bidding goodbye to her friend. You picked her up in your arms, her little arms wrapped around your neck.

You asked, “Had fun at school?” She furiously nodded as she rambled on about what she had done, “…and Miss Larson asked a super hard question and I was the only one who knew the answer.”

“That’s my girl,” you high-fived with her as she laughed.

“Why did you come today?” she asked, tilting her face.

“Your dad is busy at work, so he’s gonna come home late.”

“So you’re gonna stay with me then?” she asked, hope and excitement clear in her voice.

You just nodded and she let a victorious sound escape her mouth. You laughed putting her on the ground and grabbed her tiny hand in yours. “Ready to go home?”

It was late at night when Bucky came home, when he noticed you weren’t in the living room he made his way upstairs to see the adorable image of you and Becca sitting on her bed, his daughter between your legs while you brushed her hair.

Neither of you had noticed his presence yet, he smiled at the view in front of him, how comfortable you were with each other, it was so natural. The thought of coming home every day to this filled his heart with warmth.

Knock Knock

“Daddy!” Rebecca screamed when she saw her father on the doorstep of her room, but she didn’t run and jump into his arms like she would normally do.

“What? No hug today?” Bucky pouted, which made his little girl giggle.

Rebecca pinched her nose with her fingers “You stink, daddy!”

Bucky gasped with fake offense and averted his gaze to you for support, only to receive a “Don’t look at me, Becca is right.”

Your boyfriend raised his hands in surrender. “Alright, I’ll take a shower, but you, young lady, are going to sleep now,” he said, pointing his index finger towards his daughter.

“But Y/N is brushing my hair!” she whined.

“She can brush your hair another day. You’ve got to wake up early for school tomorrow,”

Rebecca looked up at you, “Can you read to me?”

“Honey, I bet Y/N is tir-” But you didn’t let your boyfriend finish his sentence. “I don’t mind.”

“Yaaay,” the little girl screamed happily. She got up from the bed and ran to get a book.

Your boyfriend gave you a “Are you sure?” look.

“It’s okay,” you reassured him, “You go shower.” Bucky nodded and left the room as Rebecca crawled back to bed and handed you a book.

She got under the covers, and you lied beside her, opening the book and started reading. “The little prince. Oh, I love this one.”

Once Rebecca finally fell asleep, you gave her a soft kiss on her forehead and made your way downstairs. Your boyfriend had finished his shower just a few minutes ago, his hair still damp.

“She’s asleep?” he inquired, his arms wrapped around your figure. You buried your face in the crook of his neck, taking in the scent of sandalwood and bergamot. You hummed in response. “Thank you for today.” At this you pulled away from him, looking at his soft features.

“It’s not a problem. You know I love spending time with her.”

“I know. And I love you for that,” he caressed your face and pulled you in again. Joining his lips with yours, your hands reached the back of his neck and you tangled your fingers into his wet hair, earning a low moan from him. You smiled into the kiss, giving him a last peck before pulling apart.

You both sat on the couch, your head resting on Bucky’s shoulder and one of your hands on his round belly, drawing patterns with your fingers. He had one arm safely around you. As you were telling him your day with Becca, he noticed that in the tone of your voice, there was something bothering you in the back of your mind.

“Hey,” he gently grabbed your chin with his free hand and made you look at him. “What’s wrong?”

You licked your lips, a habit you had developed years ago and something you always did when you were nervous. You could feel Bucky’s eyes piercing into yours. A worried expression etched on his features. “Did Becca say something to you?”

You shook your head. Swallowing hard, you tried to find the right words, not wanting your boyfriend to misinterpret what you wanted to convey. “It’s just… today, when I went to pick Becca from school, there was this kid with her and when he asked her who I was, she said that...she said that I was her mom,” You weren’t bothered or mad about the little girl referring to you as her mother but to say it didn’t shock you when you heard the words leave her mouth. Especially because it was the first time she did it.

You loved Rebecca the minute you met her; she was an adorable kid, and you of course you had thought about spending time with Bucky and her for the rest of your life, but you didn’t know if that wasn’t something she wanted, if it was something Bucky wanted. So when you heard the little girl refer to you as her mom, something fluttered inside you.

“Did she?” You could see the slight surprise on his face, but still a large smile grew on Bucky’s face and you felt like you could sigh in relief. He didn’t seem to be bothered by it. Quite the opposite, actually. “How do you feel about it?”

“I- I really liked it,” you shyly admitted, a matching smile growing on your face.

“Yeah?” he asked again. He just needed to be sure, the smile never leaving his face.

“Yeah,” you laughed happily. Bucky caressed your cheek with his thumb, and shifted your position on the sofa a little, to have better access to your lips. It was soft and sweet, nothing in the world existed but you two, you could feel fireworks exploding inside of you. Kissing Bucky always felt special and magical, but this kiss had something different, something you couldn’t explain with words.

“Every time I’m with you, there’s no other place I’d rather be. You are my world, my everything, and I’d love to do nothing more than make you happy. Becca loves you, and she could never have a better mom than you. I love you, Y/N, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. So I’m asking...will you marry me?”

[fandom-imagines]

Escape Artists

Fandom: Halloween/Slashers

Pairing: Michael Myers X Reader

Warnings: Murder, mention of parental abuse, lightly-written smut (not too descriptive).

Words: 2.4k

He had seen her around the hospital numerous times. She was always sat surrounded by those weird beads that she made designs with, only to have to hand them to one of the nurses who always seemed glad to iron the pattern for her.

Despite having seen her and observed her, Michael had never actually interacted with the girl. Sure, she was interesting, seemingly too innocent to be sat in Smiths Groves, but he wouldn’t talk to her; he wouldn’t talk to anybody. This was how he lived. Day in, day out. Never talking to a soul and nobody willingly talking to him. That was how Michael liked it which is why he couldn’t help but be irritated by the person who was interrupting his mealtime.

“Hi,” in front of Michael stood the bead girl, nervously fiddling with her fingers. “I-I made this for you.” Before he knew it, Michaels hand now held a beaded blushing panda.

He was tempted to snap the poor thing in half, and he would have had he not felt a piece of paper stuck to the back with the crappy tape the sanitorium provides.

“Don’t look yet, look when you’re alone.” She said, leaving with a short nod.

He listened to her words, going to the bathroom, the one place he was allowed to be alone, to read whatever note was scribbled on the paper.

Do you want to escape with me, Michael?

Confusion overtook his mind, the creaking of the tiled walls being the only thing he could fully register.

Not only did she know his name, but she also wanted to escape with him?

Weirdo.

He simply shrugged it off.

*

“Morning, Y/N,” a kind nurse awoke the young girl from her peaceful slumber, something that was rare for her. “Here is your medicine.”

“Thank you, Nurse Green.”

Her small hands grasped the bottle of water they provided her each morning, spare hand now filled with the medication she took daily before gulping down all nine of them with one mouthful of water.

Yesterdays interaction with Michael still plagued her mind.

She knew what he had done to his sister, everybody did, but still he was the only person she somewhat trusted her. Not that she had ever actually spoke to him of course, even though she was exceptionally kind to all those on the ward. She simply hoped he had read the note.

*

Lunchtime came round quite quickly, Y/N refusing to part with her beads and Michael nowhere to be seen, something that wasn’t uncommon.

Her fingers picked out another green bead to add to her new creation, a soft smile gracing her lips as she fit the final bead into the pattern, creating an amazing leaf. She looked up with a smile on her face, ready to show the nurse only to be met with Michael face, head tilted to the side.

“Oh,” she spoke quietly, evidently shocked at the older boy’s presence. “Hi, Michael.” Her kindness didn’t falter however, the shocked look on her face quickly forming back into the smile she wore previously.

Michaels hand reached out to grab the box of beads, pulling it towards him along with a square pegboard. He quickly got to work making a pattern, something that was done in mere minutes, pushing it back towards Y/N before leaving, not sparing her a single glance as he went back to his room.

Confused, Y/N pulled the board towards her. On it was a perfectly designed tombstone, yet it was masked as a grey brick, something Michael knew the nurses wouldn’t pick up on, only someone that was looking or expecting it would. However, beneath the board was a small slip of paper, something that caused her Y/E/C orbs to widen, quickly yet carefully sliding the paper into the pocket of her knitted sweatshirt.

*

“He what?” Loomis’s voice was loud, booming throughout the office. “He interacted with another patient?”

The nurses were unable to tell whether he was scared or happy at this news.

Michael had never interacted with another patient before, never interacted with anyone at all so this was a big surprise to him.

“Leave this to me,”

*

Yes.

This one word was floating around Y/N’s mind for the entire night.

He wants to escape with her? Michael Myers wants to escape with her? It was something she could not refuse, so she got to writing.

*

Over the following months the two shared notes through the beads they would both make. Nobody had spotted this yet, the scheme too smart for the nurses and doctors alike at Smiths Grove. Loomis had been keeping a close eye on the pair, looking for something significant that he could use against Michael but there was nothing yet, nothing at all.

The girl was sat at her usual table, alone for once which was uncommon for her. She wouldn’t have been alone had she not told the usual people that she wished to be alone today.

She was waiting.

Waiting for Michael.

A small sense of glee filled her chest when she noticed him walk into the cafeteria, a small smile following suite. The smile only dropped when he ignored her presence, walking towards where he usually sat. He must have sensed her gaze, glancing up to catch her sight before glancing at the chair opposite him, a silent hint for her to come over which she gladly did.

“Hi,”

Michael didn’t give her a verbal response, something she was used to by now, he instead looked towards her hands that held her most recent pattern: a pink milk carton. She eagerly passed it to him, watching him closely for any sign of reaction as he observed it, the two unaware that somebody else was also watching him.

*

“I want you to cut all communication between Michael and Y/N,” Loomis seemed to have come up with a plan of his own. “We’ll see how he reacts to that.”

“Yes, Dr Loomis.”

*

Y/N sat at the desk in her room, spinning the board around the wood with her finger.

“Why am I stuck in here?” Her tone expressed how fed up she was of being confined her for the entire day. “I’m bored.”

“Why don’t you make something?”

“Why am I here?”

“A doctor wants to see you.”

“I’ve seen all the doctors. Which one?”

“Dr Loomis.”

Oh, so it worked, good to know.

*

A few hours later she was seated on her bed, legs crossed with her pigtails falling down to her knee.

“We’ve met before, Y/N. After you were first sent here.” Loomis did his best to be friendly, hiding the burning curiosity and urge to ask her everything he wanted in one go.

“Yes, Dr Loomis.” Her tone was friendly, also forced.

She was waiting. Waiting for-

An excruciating loud beep blared throughout the entire ward, signalling a door had been opened by one of the patients.

Loomis’s eyes widened, worried that it was Michael who had escaped. He didn’t even bother to say goodbye before rushing off, forgetting to lock the door on the way out, something the pair had planned.

*

Y/N had half expected their planned escape car to be gone by the time she had finished running to the door, Michael probably having using her to escape. Weirdly enough, he was sat there waiting for her, something that made her smile as she hopped into the car.

Their plan, something that had been in the works for an insane amount of time, had worked. Every part of it had gone how they had planned.

“Thank you,” Y/N’s voice was as soft as always, glancing at Michael whose eyes were focused on the road, seemingly dismissing her appreciation.

He wasn’t however. He was silently grateful for her. She had stuck by him, his quiet and rude self. She knew what he had done and had still accepted him, he could see it in her face. He assumed she was simply in for depression or something of the sort, uncaring as to why because all he cared about was leaving and finishing what he had started, but something about her drew him in and he began getting somewhat attached to the girl.

*

The pair drove for hours, having to stop by to get gas before pulling into an abandoned place far away from the main road so that nobody could find them.

“Do you want a drink?” Michael gave her a confused look as she sat on the car, hand stretched out to hand him a bottle. “It’s weird you know,” she continued speaking after he took the bottle from her hand and sat beside her, “I never thought I’d make it to adulthood.”

This further proved his point of her having depression.

“Not that I’m depressed or suicidal or anything. I just thought I’d die by now.” This simply confused Michael. If she wasn’t in there for depression, what was she in for?

The nights sky hung over the pair, stars being one of the only things lighting the place, supported by the car’s lights.

Y/N seemed to sense his confusion.

“Oh, you don’t know what I’m in for? Well, was in for.” Michael simply shook his head.

“I killed someone. My dad. He used to hurt me, physically, mentally, emotionally and a few other things. My mother just watched it all happen, so I tried to kill her as well but she got away and I was dragged there.”

Michael nodded as to show that he understood.

“It’s weird. When I was younger, I always thought I’d be a popular eighteen-year-old with a boyfriend, a lot of friends and all that stuff. I never thought I’d be here,” her gaze fell on Michael, “but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Even if I am a virgin.” Y/N made sure to finish her sentence off with a joke, hoping to ease the tension she felt whilst expressing her emotions whilst continuing to stare up at the sky, oblivious to the thoughts running through Michaels head, his face not showing any signs either.

Y/N jumped at the cold sensation of Michaels hand touching her bare thigh, goosebumps rising beneath her dress. “Michael?” She turned to face the unmasked man, only to be pushed to lean against the back of the car with attempted gentleness. “Michael?” She repeated, growing even more confused as he lifted himself over her, able to feel her heart pound.

She didn’t fear him, she had never feared him; he’d never given her a reason. Sure he could be rude towards her, but never fear-inducing, never to her.

“Michael?”

Her words were silenced as Michaels body crawled onto her own, his chest pressed against hers, both hearts racing, despite Michael’s calm composure and Y/N’s confused look. Her eyes widened as she felt Michaels lips against her neck, roughly sucking with such force that she knew it would leave a mark.

A soft moan left her lips when Michael’s hand wandered down to her chest, lightly toying with her nipples before grabbing her breast, massaging it as he did so. The moans that left her lips simply increased Michael’s urges, his desires; he wanted her, and it seemed like she wanted him too.

“Michael-“she murmured, fingers looping themselves in the strands of his hair as he nipped at her skin.

Her free hand ran down his front, searching for his clothed erection which she soon founds, enjoying the breathy moan that Michael made as she slid her hand into his pants. It was quiet, but not quiet enough. Michael’s own hand reached into her own panties, finger soaking up the wetness that had formed at his touch, something that almost made him smirk.

Another moan fell from Y/N’s lips as Michael’s fingers began to explore, the tightness she felt was almost too tight, yet Michael was surprisingly gentle considering who he was. This time Michael couldn’t resist his smirk, being thankful for the fact that his face was buried into the crook of her neck, marking her as his and his only.

Her grip on his hair tightened as he slipped another finger inside of her, giving her a moment to adjust before slowly moving. It wasn’t long before pleasure began to consume her, grip tightening on his hair further as she neared her end.

“M-Michael,” she moaned. “I want you,”

He seemed happy to comply, fingers leaving her heat to unclothe his member. He waited for a moment, searching Y/N’s eyes for any sort of hesitation before sliding in, giving her time to adjust.

“I’m ready, you can move.”

His movements were slow to begin with, giving it his best attempt at not hurting her, something that was incredibly hard for his rough self, but self-restraint can be a magical thing. It wasn’t until the word ‘more’ left her lips that he finally increased his movements.

The cold of the cars metal caused shivers to run down Y/N’s spine, made worse by Michael’s cold hands running across her, now bare, body as moans filled the air.

“I-I’m close,”

Her words only increased his movements more, desperate to reach both their ends. Michael’s hand moved down to her clit, harshly rubbing in hopes that in would held her meet her own release, which it did and she came with one final moan, her sudden tightness triggering Michael’s own orgasm as he came inside of her, their juices mixing together.

Cheeks flushed, both Y/N and Michael wordlessly laid against the car’s windscreen. Deciding to test the waters, Y/N leant herself against Michael’s shoulder, silently pleased when he showed no sign of rejection.

He was surprisingly warm, heating up her cold body in the cool night’s air; she never expected him to be so warm. She lightly wrapped her hand around his upper arm, snuggling herself into his shoulder before falling asleep.

Michael stared at the sleeping girl, confused and shocked at how she had so much trust in him, despite what he had done. It was oddly reassuring to him. Once certain she was asleep, he raised his hand to move a stray strand of hair from her face before falling asleep himself.

“Goodnight, Y/N,”

[junghelioseok]

clandestine. | 02

↳ forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest.

◇ jungkook x reader ◇ smut | fluff | brother’s best friend!au ◇ 7k [2/6]

notes: looks like it’s a writing/editing kinda day, folks! hope you enjoy this installment, and let me know what you think! 

warnings: jk’s massive noona kink: a recurring yet warranted warning, jeon jungkook is a goddamn tease, smuuuut, oral (f receiving), jk’s got a big dick whoOPS, minimally edited bc i’m feeling lazy

⇢ 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 

Morning brings with it bright sunshine and fresh horror as the events of the previous evening come rushing back. You aren’t sure you’ll ever be able to look Jeon Jungkook in the eye again—or at least, not without being reminded of the way he’d plagued every single one of your dreams with devilish eyes and even more devilish fingers. Groaning, you scrub at your temples, as if that will help dispel the memories. After a few fruitless moments, you crawl out of bed and head for the bathroom, intent on washing everything away with a good, cold shower.

Try as you might, though, you simply cannot avoid your dark-haired neighbor. You’re in the kitchen sipping at your second coffee of the day and debating what you want for lunch when there’s a knock on the front door—a familiar rhythm that has your heart stuttering. “It’s open!” Jimin yells from the living room, and a moment later, the devil himself strolls in, wearing a plain black t-shirt with ripped jeans and well-worn Timberlands. Vaguely, you wonder when he made the switch from white tees to black, but your musings are cut short when he spots you in the kitchen, an impish grin settling across his face.

“Hey, Noona.”

“Hey.” You thank whatever god may be out there that your voice is steady. “Jimin’s in the living room.”

Jungkook tilts his head coyly and takes a step forward. “What makes you think I’m here for Jimin? Maybe I came to see you.”

Anxiously, you swallow down the memories of his warm hands that are trying to resurface. “I highly doubt that.”

“Really?” Jungkook takes another step forward and plucks the coffee mug from your hands. “What if I came over to finish what I started last night?”

Heat floods across your face. “That—that was… I mean, I don’t—”

“You don’t what?” Jungkook asks, raising a brow. “Want me? Because I’m pretty sure that’s a lie, Noona.” Quietly, he closes the last bit of distance between you, and when he speaks again you can feel his warm breath fanning across your cheeks with every word. “You see, I think you want me. Just as much as I want you. Am I wrong?”

“Jungkook, we—”

“Dude, what’s taking you so long?” Jimin’s head suddenly pops around the doorway, and you nearly jump out of your skin in your effort to put some distance between you and your dark-haired neighbor. “I’m about to start the game without you.”

“Just wanted to grab some coffee and say hi to {Name},” Jungkook replies, raising your half-empty mug to his lips and taking a sip. “Did you want to join us, Noona? It’d be fun to watch you kick Jimin’s ass at Mario Kart again.”

You swallow, hard. “I can’t. I’ve got homework to do.” Not strictly true, perhaps, but you’d been planning on looking over the details of your internship again at some point, and now seems as good a time as any. “Sorry,” you add quickly, seeing Jungkook’s disbelieving expression.

“Summer homework? Gross.” Jimin pulls a face. “You’re still coming to Tae’s party though, right?”

You nod, unwillingly catching Jungkook’s eye again. He’s still sipping at your coffee, and you don’t miss the flagrant wink he shoots you over the rim of the cup. “See you later then, Noona,” he says, his voice practically a purr.

“Right,” you respond dully, your heart skipping a beat at the dark promise in his stare. “Later.”

Jimin and Jungkook disappear down the hall, but you remain rooted in the kitchen for a few minutes longer, listening as the music of whatever video game they’ve decided on starts playing from the living room. Heaving a sigh, you fetch a new mug from the cupboard and pour yourself some more coffee, grabbing an apple and a bag of chips as well. Taking everything up to your bedroom, you pull out your laptop and make yourself comfortable on your bed, plugging in some headphones to drown out the noise from downstairs. With any luck, you won’t have to see Jungkook again until you have to leave for Taehyung’s party, and you’re pretty sure that it’ll be easy to avoid him once you’re there.

In fact, you’re certain of it.

So with that thought in mind, you settle down with your coffee and open up Netflix, sinking into the pillows and pushing your dark-haired neighbor into the deepest recesses of your mind. It isn’t until your phone starts vibrating insistently against your thigh that you are startled out of your binge-watching, the screen lit up with two new notifications. Surprised, you realize that hours have passed, the sky outside your window deepening into the hazy blue of nighttime.

[6:02pm] Jungkook: you hungry, noona?

[6:02pm] Jungkook: for pizza, i mean. we ordered dinner

[6:03pm] Jungkook: but i’ll be your dessert if you want me ;)

You drop your phone as if burned, his final message playing over and over in your mind. It takes you a full minute to gather your wits again, stowing your device in your pocket without responding and carefully picking your way downstairs. Already, you can smell the cheesy grease, your stomach growling in anticipation.

Just grab the pizza and go, you think to yourself, formulating your escape plan and double-checking it for any holes. Dine and dash.

You’re walking past the foyer when there’s suddenly a knock on the front door. Curiously, you answer it, swinging it open to see a familiar grinning face standing on the doorstep. Lee Taemin is a good friend of Jimin’s, and your brother pokes his head out from the kitchen at the sound of your greeting, clearly expecting the new guest.

“Taemin! Get in here and have some pizza,” Jimin says, his mouth full. “You too, Noona. We got plenty.”

Instead of immediately heading for the food, Taemin wraps you in a hug that has you wheezing for air. “Long time no see, huh? How’ve you been?”

You squirm in his tight embrace, raised to your tiptoes. “Put me down, you heathen. I’m fine right now, but I won’t be if you suffocate me.”

Taemin chortles good-naturedly and releases his grip, ruffling your hair. “Good to see you too, {Name}. Honestly, it hasn’t been the same around here without you. How long are you back for? The whole summer?”

You shake your head. “Just a couple weeks. I’ve got to get back for an internship.”

“Already a hotshot, huh?” Taemin grins. “What are you going to be doing?”

The topic of your summer job is a welcome distraction from the way Jungkook’s dark gaze trails after you as you tread into the kitchen alongside Taemin, slapping two slices of pizza onto a plate and glancing around for a napkin. You can feel his eyes boring into the back of your skull, prickling your skin with electricity, but continue your conversation with Taemin as if nothing is amiss.

“You gonna sit down or what?” Taemin gives you a quizzical glance as he pulls a chair out from the table, joining Jimin and Jungkook who are already seated. You do your best to ignore the way Jungkook’s jaw flexes with every chew, somehow managing to look infuriatingly handsome despite the mouth full of dough and pizza grease staining his chin.

“I—” Your mind whirs, searching for the excuse you had planned. “—I still have some work to do. Reading and whatnot.”

“Nerd,” Jimin snorts.

Taemin shrugs. “Okay, then. Suit yourself, I guess.”

Jungkook doesn’t say anything. But you feel his eyes burning into your skin as you head back upstairs, and it isn’t until you are safely back in your bedroom, sagging against the closed door, that you can finally breathe properly again.

///

You end up departing for the party nearly twenty minutes after the official start time of eight o’clock, caving to Jimin’s insistence on being fashionably late. Personally, you think he just wanted the extra time to work on his hair—making sure every strand is perfectly, effortlessly tousled—and call him out on it as he locks the front door behind you.

“I didn’t spend that long on my hair,” Jimin sniffs defensively. “Besides, you’re the one who needed to run back in and get your wallet. What do you even need your wallet for? We’re walking like, four blocks.”

“Better safe than sorry,” you retort. “What if I get murdered and they need to identify my body? What if I get mugged? You never know!”

Taemin falls into step beside you. “What if we need to tip a stripper?” he chimes in.

You nod and raise your hand for a high-five without taking your eyes off your brother. “Exactly! You have to tip your sex workers, Chim!”

Jimin waggles a suggestive eyebrow. “I think I’d rather give them a different ti—”

You push him off the sidewalk before he can finish speaking, pulling a face as he stumbles into the street in a fit of laughter. “Don’t you dare finish that sentence, you perv!”

The remainder of the short walk to Taehyung’s house passes uneventfully. Jimin doesn’t bother knocking, throwing open the door like he owns the place, and you trail after him with Taemin and Jungkook on your heels. Immediately, you’re assailed by a cacophonous sea of conversation and thumping music, people milling around in the dimly lit interior.

“There you are!” The voice comes from your left, and you barely have time to register the speaker’s face before she’s gasping and engulfing you in a hug. “{Name}, you made it! Hi!”

You laugh, squeezing her back. “Hi, Chaeyoung. It’s good to see you. Sorry I didn’t catch you at graduation.”

“Oh please,” she says, waving you off. “We have all the time in the world to catch up now. Let’s get you away from these boys and find you a drink, shall we?” Flipping a lock of strawberry blonde hair over her shoulder, she loops her arm through yours and begins steering you toward the kitchen. “So what are you in the mood for? The beer’s shit, so I’d stay away from anything in the cooler, but everything else is actually drinkable.”

“Shocking,” you remark, peering at the mess of bottles and cups lining the kitchen counter. There’s a massive bowl of a horrifyingly neon green concoction as well, and you take one whiff before backing away again, nose wrinkling in disgust. “I see Tae’s still making punch.”

“I wouldn’t touch that if I were you,” Chaeyoung advises. “He’s somehow managed to make it twice as sugary and three times more alcoholic than last year’s. Pretty sure it’s worse than moonshine at this point.”

You grin and locate an empty cup, raising it in her direction. “Thanks for the heads up.”

Chaeyoung refills her own drink, and you settle on a simple blend of cranberry juice and vodka. Together, you head back in the direction of the living room, where Jisoo and Lisa are chattering away on a couch in the corner. They look up at your arrival, greeting you with smiles and hugs, and quickly usher you into a seat beside them.

“So,” Jisoo begins, leaning forward. “How’s college?”

“Tell us everything,” Lisa adds, propping her chin in her palm. “Is it nice living away from home?”

Jisoo waggles her brows. “Forget that. Have you met any guys?”

Unbidden, Jungkook springs to the forefront of your mind, dark eyes staring at you from beneath equally dark hair as he leans down, down, down—

“Nope!” you blurt before your thoughts can progress any further. “I mean, I share a suite with a couple guys, but that doesn’t count.”

“Are they cute?” Lisa prods.

“They must be more mature than these high school boys,” Chaeyoung sighs.

“Hardly,” you snort. “Don’t get your hopes up.”

The gossip continues. More people arrive as the night wears on, the living room filling up with dancing bodies. A few girls you don’t know join in your conversation, perching on armrests and ottomans and the carpeted floor as a last resort. Across the hall in the dining room, you spot Taemin setting up a table for beer pong, a triumphant shout going up when Taehyung procures an unopened package of balls from somewhere in the hall closet.

“This is gonna be tournament style, got it?” he announces as he tears the package open. “Winner goes up against the undefeated champs—Jungkook and Yugyeom!”

Even from your comfy seat on the couch, you can see the arrogant twist of Jungkook’s mouth as he leans over to give Yugyeom a high-five. You can’t tear your eyes away from the way he tongues his cheek, lounging back into a chair to watch the first round of the game. Jimin steps forward alongside Taehyung, and you watch as your brother scrutinizes the pyramid of cups, poised to make a throw that lifts his shirt just enough to expose a flash of his admittedly toned abdomen.

“He wore that shirt on purpose,” Jisoo accuses, and you huff out a sound that’s more snort than laugh.

“Please, it’s just the only shirt he owns that isn’t dirty. Trust me.”

“I don’t even care,” another girl you don’t know the name of pipes up. “I’d still let him blow my back out.”

You grimace. “And on that note, I suddenly need another drink,” you announce, to giggles. Wrenching out of your cozy seat between Jisoo and Lisa, you wave your near empty cup in farewell and make your way toward the kitchen, carefully skirting around the dancers and beer pong spectators spilling out into the hallway.

The kitchen is deserted when you walk in, everyone having flocked to the dining room to watch the beer pong tournament. Humming along to the music, you open up the fridge and survey its contents, hoping to find something decent. Curiously, you pick your way past a few cans before turning a dark glass bottle around to read the label.

“Are you avoiding me, Noona?”

The voice comes from behind you, deep and sinfully resonant, and you don’t even have to turn around to know that he’s standing just inches away. His breath ruffles through the hair at the nape of your neck, sending gooseflesh prickling across your skin, and when strong hands curl gently around your hips you let out a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding.

“I missed you, y’know,” he continues, his mouth finding its way to your ear and nipping lightly at the lobe. “You didn’t talk to me all day, even though I was right there in your house. Ran like a scared little rabbit when you saw me in the kitchen, didn’t you?” Softly, his lips ghost along the column of your throat, pressing a kiss to the junction of your neck and shoulder. “So, now what? Are you gonna run from me again?”

You don’t think you could if you tried. Your feet are rooted firmly in place, your entire body frozen as you await whatever he’ll do next. And when he urges you to spin around and face him, you obey immediately, your hands coming up to splay against his chest as he presses even closer and rewards your compliance with a kiss.

“Jungkook,” you breathe against his parted lips. “Jungkook, god.”

Slowly, he trails down your neck, leaving soft nips in his wake. “Yes, Noona?”

“We can’t,” you whisper, even as your head falls back to allow him more access to your clavicle. “Jungkook, we can’t do this.”

Your companion raises his head then, his dark gaze meeting yours. “Tell me to stop,” he says quietly. His thumbs dip beneath the hem of your shirt, rubbing circles into the soft skin of your waist, and you inhale sharply at the feeling. “If that’s what you want, Noona, just tell me to stop and I will. I promise.”

He’s palming along your hips now. The warmth of his palms seeps into your body, rendering it increasingly difficult to concentrate. His mouth returns to your neck as he awaits your answer, and you don’t miss the way his lips curl into a smirk against the delicate skin of your collarbone when you hesitate a moment too long.

“Well, Noona?”

Fuck it. Your arms wind around his neck, pulling him closer until there’s no space left between your bodies. “Jungkook, kiss me,” you breathe, throwing all remaining remnants of caution to the wind.

Jungkook straightens up to his full height, his smirk widening. “Anything for you, princess,” he remarks before leaning down, winding one hand in your hair and finding purchase in the curve of your waist with the other. The newfound pet name ignites a tendril of heat in the pit of your belly, and when Jungkook finally closes the gap between your lips, you release a breathy moan that he eagerly swallows. The hand in your hair tightens its grip to pull you even closer, tongues and teeth clashing as he deepens the kiss.

It’s only when the need for air becomes critical that you break away from him with a gasp, your lungs aching. Jungkook isn’t faring much better, his chest heaving beneath the thin white material of his t-shirt. He releases his grip on your hair, his thumb grazing across your cheek gently instead, and when he leans in to plant another kiss on your mouth, you exhale shakily. “God, Jungkook.”

His arm tightens around your waist. “What do you need, princess?” he asks, and you can’t deny your delight at his continued use of the nickname. His teeth find the lobe of your ear again, and you release a breathy moan as he delivers a particularly sharp nip to the soft flesh before pressing an open-mouthed kiss to the sensitive spot just below it. “Tell me. Tell me, and I’ll give it to you. I’ll give you anything you want.”

You slide your hands along his broad shoulders and up to his nape, brushing the silver hoops in his ears before tangling your fingers in his silky hair. “You’re teasing me.”

Jungkook clicks his tongue and pulls away, your arms falling uselessly to your sides as he takes a step back. “I just need to hear you say it, Noona,” he chides, his voice leaving no room for disobedience. “I need to hear you say that you want this. That you want me.”

A shiver dances up your spine, and you aren’t sure whether it’s due to his wicked lilt or the sudden absence of his body heat. “I want you,” you whisper, reaching out to touch him. “Jungkook, please.”

The smirk that spreads across his face is absolutely devastating. “Then come with me,” he commands softly, taking your hand and lacing your fingers together. You leave behind the thumping music and the loud chatter of the party, allowing Jungkook to pull you into one of several rooms lining the hallway and squeaking when he shuts the door and immediately pins you against it. His mouth slants across yours, hot and urgent, and you moan into the kiss as your hands fly up to grip his shoulders.

“Do you know how long I’ve wanted this?” Jungkook breathes, pulling away just enough to whisper the words against your lips. “Fuck, princess, look at this tiny little skirt you’re wearing. You’ve been killing me all night, you know that?”

He punctuates the words with another kiss, nipping harshly at your bottom lip. His hands slide down to the curve of your ass, and you gasp when he scoops you up effortlessly. “Legs around my waist,” he orders, readjusting his grip as he begins walking you further into the room.

It’s the laundry room, you realize upon closer inspection. Jungkook’s busy mouthing at your neck, but he breaks away with a smirk when he finally reaches his destination, plopping you down atop the cool metal of the washing machine. “Shame there’s nothing in here,” he remarks, kicking the side softly. “I really wanna fuck you with this thing running one day. But for now…” His smirk widens, his hands settling on your knees. “This’ll do.”

In an instant, he’s pushed up your skirt and hooked his thumbs into the waistband of your panties, tugging them down and off your legs. He drops to his knees, smoothing his hands along your inner thighs, and your cheeks flush when he urges you to spread them further. “Jungkook—“ you mumble, thoroughly embarrassed as he stares reverently at your exposed core, his tongue swiping across his bottom lip. “Quit staring at me like that.”

“I can’t help it,” he murmurs, leaning in and pressing a soft trail of kisses along your thigh. “You’re so beautiful, Noona.”

“You…”

You trail off, unsure of what to say. What do you say when your little brother’s best friend is staring at you like you’re a desert oasis and he’s been wandering, dehydrated, for days? What do you say when the scrawny neighbor kid you’d grown up with is caressing every inch of your legs, soothing the soft skin with his fingers and lips?

What do you say when you realize, once and for all, that Jeon Jungkook is undoubtedly—unabashedly—a man now?

You swallow, hard. Jungkook is nearing your core now, his hair tickling your thighs, and you gasp when he slides a finger up your slit experimentally. “You’re so wet,” he breathes. “So wet, and so—” He touches the pad of his finger to his tongue, grinning up at you as he laps up your essence. “—delicious. Fuck. You’re the best thing I’ve ever tasted.”

And then he leans forward, boldly licking a stripe up the length of your entrance. Strong arms wind around your legs to hold you open, and when he shoves his face even deeper, his nose brushing against your clit, you let out a strangled whimper. “Fuck, Jungkook—”

The sound of his name draws a pleased hum from the young man nestled between your thighs, rumbling through his chest and straight to your core. Your walls clench, but Jungkook stubbornly refuses to dip his tongue inside. Instead, he teases at your folds, spreading them apart with two fingers and licking ardently at your leaking juices before kissing a short trail up to your clit. “Can you cum like this?” he asks curiously, thumbing across the sensitive bundle of nerves.

His answer comes in the form of a breathy gasp, your hips jerking upward to seek out more friction. Jungkook chuckles and obliges your silent request, dark eyes flickering up to meet yours as he begins rubbing slow circles around your bud. “Guess that’s a yes,” he murmurs, pressing yet another kiss to your thigh. His gaze remains locked on yours as he rubs a little harder, dragging your juices up from your slit and digging in deep until you are moaning aloud, your hands coming down to fist in his silky hair.

“I-I’m close,” you keen. “Please, Jungkook, please.”

Jungkook hums and leans back. At the same time, he slides two fingers inside you, curling them upward, and the sudden surge of fullness is more than enough to tip you over the edge. His name escapes your lips in a garbled moan, your walls spasming around his hand as he continues teasing your clit, drawing out your orgasm until you finally whine from oversensitivity and bat him away. Obediently, he withdraws, rising to his feet so that he towers over you once more.

“Holy fuck,” he murmurs, staring down at you with an expression caught somewhere between awestruck wonder and unbridled hunger. “You’re so pretty when you cum. So pretty and perfect and—” He swallows, his throat bobbing harshly. “God, I need to fuck you. Can I fuck you now, Noona? Will you let me stretch open this pretty little pussy and fill you up with my cock?”

Your breath hitches. Never in a million years could you have imagined that your brother’s mild-mannered best friend could have such a filthy mouth, but you cannot hide the way your core clenches at his words. Slowly, you raise your arms, winding them around his neck to pull him closer. “Yes,” you whisper, brushing your lips against his. “Fuck me, Jungkook.”

A groan escapes him, deep and cavernous in a way that sends heat spiking through your veins. Jungkook doesn’t waste any time, his mouth chasing after yours as one hand finds the back of your head, pulling you into a bruising kiss. The other slides down to the waistband of his jeans, freeing himself from the confines of the denim. He doesn’t break the kiss for a moment, even as he grabs your hips and pulls you closer. It isn’t until you’re seated on the very edge of the washing machine, wrapping your legs around his waist to steady yourself, that you pull away and let your gaze fall to his newly revealed cock. Jungkook is long and deliciously thick, and you let out a shaky breath when you see the pearlescent white drops beading at the swollen tip.

“Oh my god.” The words bubble up automatically, escaping you in an airy whisper. “How are you so big?”

Jungkook huffs out a hoarse chuckle, amusement glittering in his dark irises. “Think you can take all of me, princess?”

Your gaze falls down to his length again, your tongue darting out to wet your lips. “Put on a condom, and let’s find out.”

Jungkook grins and produces a little foil wrapper from somewhere in his back pocket, tearing into it with his teeth. You help him roll the condom over his cock, and as soon as it’s in place, he’s lining himself up and pushing inside you. A deep groan escapes him as he parts your walls inch by torturous inch, and you moan as your pussy is stretched to its limit, molding to his shape and sheer size. By the time he bottoms out, he’s almost prodding at your cervix, and you grab breathlessly at his bicep.

“I—I need a minute,” you gasp, your body spasming around him as you fight to adjust to the surge of fullness.

“Me too,” Jungkook rasps, his voice strained. His eyes flutter shut as he inhales deeply through his nose, cursing again when you clench around him unconsciously. “Fuck. You’re so tight.”

For a few moments, there’s only the sound of Jungkook’s labored breathing, his head falling forward to rest on your shoulder. His breath is hot against the exposed skin of your clavicle, and you sigh when you feel him mouthing at the delicate skin, nipping softly before soothing across it with his tongue.

At the sound, Jungkook raises his head, dark eyes meeting yours before dropping down to where the two of you are joined. “God, you look so good like this,” he murmurs, licking his lips. “So pretty, stuffed full of my cock.”

You clench around him again—this time more purposefully. Jungkook’s mouth falls open, a silent question on the tip of his tongue, and you answer it with a deliberate roll of your hips, wordlessly encouraging him to move. Gingerly, he obeys, retreating until only the head of his erection remains inside you. His hand drops down to your clit, and you keen out his name when he surges forward at the same time he flicks his thumb across the sensitive nub. Pleasure licks at your spine, replacing the discomfort. Jungkook lets out a pleased hum.

Slowly, he works up a rhythm, keeping his thrusts shallow as he begins rubbing circles around your clit again. With his other hand, he slides the straps of your top down your shoulders, tugging the bodice down just enough to free your breasts. Your nipples harden at the exposure, and a moan escapes you when he immediately takes one between his fingers, rolling and pinching at the peak. The additional stimulation, paired with the heavy drag of his cock along your walls and his insistent thumb on your clit, has you teetering dangerously close to the edge, your tummy tensing.

“Jungkook—” you whimper, your nails digging into his shoulders. He grunts in response and picks up the pace, rolling even more fervently up into your clenching heat, and you gasp when a particularly hard thrust sends you scooting backward atop the washing machine. “Fuck! I’m close, Jungkook.”

“Me too,” he grits out. “Come on, princess, cum for me. I know you can do it, just let go for me one more time—”

And with one final flick of his wrist and a thrust that’s so deep you can practically feel him in the back of your throat, you come completely undone, spasming wildly around his cock. It all proves too much for Jungkook, who’s groaning right alongside you as he reaches his high, spilling into the condom. He chants your name like a prayer as his hips gradually still, and his lips seek out yours almost instinctively as his cock softens inside you. The kiss is lazy and languid, contentment settling in your veins. Jungkook wraps you up in a warm embrace, his tongue dipping inside your mouth to explore.

It isn’t until a loud cheer rises up from the front of the house that you snap out of your blissful haze. “We should get back to the party,” you mumble into the kiss, pushing against Jungkook’s chest when he only pulls you closer. “Jungkook, come on. People are gonna get suspicious if we’re gone too long.”

“You know what else will make people suspicious? You, coming out like that.” He gestures at the skirt hiked up around your waist, a slow smirk playing at his lips as he gives you a once-over, his gaze lingering on the wet sheen streaking your inner thighs. “As much as I’m enjoying the view.”

You swat his arm. “Stop that!”

Jungkook snickers and bends down to pick up your discarded panties, swinging them around his index finger. “Stop what?”

“Oh my god, Jungkook.”

Cackling, he returns the lacy undergarment to you, watching as you pull the material up your legs. You adjust your shirt while he disposes of his condom, and when you hop off the washing machine, he offers you a hand that you gratefully accept, gripping his arm as you steady yourself on shaky legs.

“You should leave first,” you tell him, smoothing out the wrinkles in his t-shirt and relishing the way his muscles twitch beneath your fingertips. “It’ll look weird if we leave together, and I need to pee, anyway.”

Jungkook grins and catches your wrists, swooping down to plant a quick kiss on your mouth. “As you wish,” he says, offering you a playful wink.

Then he’s straightening back up to his full height, checking his pockets and running a hand through his mussed hair. You watch as he walks over to the door, putting his ear against it for a few seconds before determining that the coast is clear and slipping out into the hallway. As the door clicks shut behind him, you hear someone—you’re pretty sure it’s a drunk Yugyeom—greet him with a resounding clap on the back. “Dude, where have you been all night? We’re getting our asses handed to us. Minho and Taemin are winning.”

“Sorry, man,” Jungkook half-shouts, and you realize that he’s making sure you can hear him. “Come on. Let’s go get that crown.”

Leaning against the door, you listen as their voices recede down the hallway. You count to five, and then to ten when your thumping heart refuses to slow. At nineteen, it finally calms down—enough that you feel comfortable leaving the laundry room and slipping into the bathroom to clean yourself up.

There’s a massive crowd gathered in the dining room by the time you rejoin the party, and you easily slip unnoticed into the mass of people eagerly watching the final round of the beer pong tournament. Jungkook stands at the far end of the table beside Yugyeom, poised to throw.

He catches your eye at the same time he releases the ball with a flick of his wrist, a knowing smirk settling on his face as triumphant cheers break out all around you.

///

It’s well after midnight by the time the party begins to wind down. Chaeyoung and Lisa are nowhere to be found, and several other girls are lingering near the front door saying their goodbyes before heading out. You find yourself seated on the couch between Jimin and Minho, watching as the latter helps clean up by hurling beer cans at the wastebasket on the other end of the room.

“Man, no wonder you suck at pong.” Jungkook walks into the room and plops down on an end table, a faded cardboard Burger King crown sitting rakishly on his head. “Want me to show you how the champs do it?”

Minho snorts. “Fuck off, man, you barely won that second game. Besides, we totally would’ve won if Taemin hadn’t spent half the time staring at Lisa’s tits.”

Taemin, who’s perched on a corner of the coffee table, raises his hands innocently. “Hey, don’t look at me. I scored most of the points that round.”

Minho huffs irritably and tosses another can at the wastebasket, cursing when it bounces off the rim. Taehyung wanders in and picks it up, throwing it back at Minho before squeezing into the miniscule amount of space between you and Jimin on the couch.

“Jesus, Tae,” you grunt, shifting to give him more room. The movement tilts you toward Minho, smushing you against his side, and he shoots you a playful grin and a wink.

“Cozy?”

“Cozy,” you confirm with a laugh.

“Good,” he says, freeing his arm and throwing it across the back of the couch to give you a little more space. “It’s nice having you around again, Noona.”

Jungkook’s head whirls around so quickly you fear he might have given himself whiplash. His stare zeroes in on Minho’s arm, eyes narrowing at the proximity, but the other boy remains blissfully unaware as he leans back against the couch cushions. Subtly, you lean forward, trying to put some distance between your bodies.

“It’s nice to be back,” you tell him. “It feels like I missed so much, but at the same time, it’s like nothing’s changed.”

“Choi’s aim sure hasn’t changed,” Yugyeom remarks from the doorway with a handful of empty beer bottles. “Still can’t land a shot, even after all these years.” Raising a bottle, he hefts it toward the wastebasket, smirking in satisfaction when it sinks perfectly inside the can.

“And not just with pong,” Taemin goads. “How did things go with Sana again?”

Minho rolls his eyes. “Like you’re one to talk. Besides, we’d all probably stand a better chance if Jeon over there would leave some girls for the rest of us.”

“You’re just jealous because Sana likes him better than she likes you,” Taehyung says with a snicker. “Yo, Jeon! Didn’t you guys make it to third base at Jackson’s party?”

Your stomach sinks as all eyes in the room turn to Jungkook, whose eyes go wide at the sudden attention. “What?”

“Sa. Na,” Taehyung repeats, emphasizing each syllable. “Hottest girl in our year? Third base at Jackson’s? Or are you having a hard time remembering since you wound up leaving with Jihyo?”

Yugyeom chortles as he plops down onto the carpeted floor. “Fuck, man, I forgot about that. Jesus. Just last year you were still shitting yourself at the thought of talking to a girl. Who knew you secretly had so much game?”

The room is beginning to feel stifling. Every breath you take feels like you’re inhaling ash, like a volcano that has lain dormant for ages has suddenly and without warning erupted inside your chest.

He’s playing you. And even worse, it seems that this is a game he’s played before—many times, if his friends are to be believed. Your stomach turns at the thought.

From his perch on the end table, Jungkook scoffs out a stilted, staccato note. “Right. I guess any nonzero number would seem high to you guys, huh?”

Loud jeers break out from the surrounding boys, and you do your best to melt back into the couch cushions. The way you’re squished between Taehyung and Minho makes it impossible for you to find any leverage to stand, so you settle for leaning your head back and staring at the stucco ceiling, willing your heartbeat to slow. Gradually, the noise of the party fades into the background, as do the voices of your brother and his friends. It’s only when Jimin pokes your shoulder, singsonging your name, that you break out of your trance.

“What? Huh?”

“The lake house,” Jimin says, looking at you as if you’re stupid. “You down?”

You can only blink at him, repeating the words back to him dumbly. “The lake house?”

Jimin raises a brow. “Yeah, the lake house. You know, our lake house? The one we drive up to every summer? Where we’ve been vacationing since we were like, five?”

You scowl when he pinches your cheek like you’re a child again. “Yeah, I got that. What about it?”

A snort. “Jeez, have you been listening at all, Noona? We’re talking about going up there for a few days.”

“Oh,” you croak. Unwillingly, you find yourself glancing over at Jungkook, your face growing warm when you see him staring right back, his expression careful and composed. “Right.”

“You should come, Noona,” Taemin pipes up. “You’re here for the next few weeks, right? Might as well have some fun.”

“I don’t know—” you begin, but Jimin cuts you off with a raised finger and another pinch to your cheek.

“You can’t just do homework the whole time you’re here,” he says. “Come with us, Noona. Live a little.”

“It’ll help get your mind off your internship, too,” Jungkook remarks softly. “You deserve a break. Just a few days won’t hurt.”

The fact that he remembers your internship woes shouldn’t make your heart lurch. You know it shouldn’t, but you can’t help the way your chest swells dangerously. “Fine,” you concede, reaching over Taehyung to pinch Jimin’s cheek in retaliation. “I’ll come, I guess.”

Taehyung and Taemin cheer, and Minho wraps his arm around your shoulder and squeezes you tight. “We should invite the other girls,” he points out, chuckling when you splutter for air in his ironclad grasp and try in vain to shake him off. “Don’t want it to be a total sausage fest.”

“Penis party is a much better term,” Taehyung interjects helpfully. “It’s alliterative.”

“You want alliterative? How about a cock carnival?” Jimin supplies, before doubling over in giggles.

You huff, exasperated at the ludicrous turn in conversation. “I can’t believe I’m coming with you guys.”

Minho snickers. “Title of your sex tape,” he jokes, punctuating it with a suggestive eyebrow waggle that sobers your brother up immediately. Jimin straightens up and fixes Minho with a glare, and despite your brother’s smaller stature, the older boy still shrinks back slightly.

“Dude, that’s my sister.”

Minho raises his hands apologetically. “Sorry, sorry. Automatic response. My bad.”

You just roll your eyes. “Are you twelve? God. I don’t know how the girls put up with any of you.”

Gradually, the night draws to a close. The number of people milling about dwindles, and Taehyung fiddles with his phone, letting out a satisfied hum when he finds the playlist he wants. The music transforms into something low and smooth, the soft R&B beat filling the room. You feel your eyes begin to droop.

“We should probably head home,” Jimin says, stretching his arms lazily overhead. “Noona here has to get her beauty sleep, and I don’t feel like carrying her back if she falls asleep here.”

“Shut up, Chim,” you mumble, but there’s no real bite in your tone. Jimin just chuckles and stands up, tugging on your hand until you’re on your feet as well. Jungkook straightens up too, and together, you bid farewell to the others and head for the door.

“{Name}, wait a second.”

You turn at the sound of Jisoo’s voice, tilting your head curiously as she lays a gentle hand on your arm and ushers you off to the side. “Yeah?”

Jisoo casts a furtive glance around the hallway, lowering her voice to a murmur. “I see what’s going on with Jungkook,” she whispers once she’s sure the coast is clear.

You stiffen, your mouth opening and closing a few times before you manage to find your voice again. “You… you saw us?”

She nods. “He’s been watching you all night—it’d honestly be harder not to notice. I just…” She sighs and looks around again, missing the relief that must be etched across your expression as her gaze lingers on where Jungkook and Jimin are loitering by the door. “…just be careful, okay? Jungkook—he’s changed this past year. I mean, I don’t know if all the rumors are true, but… he’s not the same guy you probably remember. He went out with Chae for a few weeks, did she tell you that?”

At your look of horror, she sighs. “Figures. She hides it well, but I know she’s still torn up about how he ended it after they slept together. So watch out for him, okay? He’s a heartbreaker. And he never, ever stays until the morning.”

Every word that leaves her mouth stings, but you don’t let that show on your face. Instead, you force a smile and pat her hand reassuringly. “Don’t worry about me,” you tell her. “I’m not going to get involved with him.”

You repeat that to yourself the whole way home, trying not to focus on the young man a few paces away and the way you can still taste him on your tongue.

[cqterpillar]

hii could you write summt about (fem) reader x damon <33 maybe like damon comforting them when their having a hard time xx

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐆𝐎𝐀𝐋

femalereader x damon albarn

genre(s) ꩜ a little angst to fluff

warning(s) ꩜ mild language

a/n ꩜ tysm for requesting, i loved this request :]

summary ꩜ college life becomes too much for y/n and she accidentally forgets her date with damon while dreading an upcoming assignment.

your college demanded so much of you. papers were due almost every day, your roommate was a pain in the ass, and it had been so long since you sat down to some home cooked meal. to top it all of, your parents were the ones who forced you to go and enroll in a major you didn’t even like!

the end goal of the week was to get in a huge essay on the benefits of creative writing with about a thousand words due, but you had no motivation to write anymore. it felt like all you were doing was writing. a paper here, an evaluative paragraph there, and you were spending your free time practicing more of your writing since the professor you had was practically beating the crap out of you mentally.

you were busy writing that thousand word essay, hoping that for once in your life, your teacher would actually give this paper a b grade at least since you were eager to ditch the feeling of being accustomed to c’s and d’s.

while caught up in penning the draft, you forgot about today’s special occasion - the one year anniversary of you and your boyfriend, damon, finally going on a first date after being iffy of if the other party liked you back. when your phone rang, you sighed, upset that a call would interrupt your thoughts.

you flipped it open and spoke into it with a dash of annoyance, “hello?”

“y/n? it’s me, damon. where are you, love?”

your heart practically stopped.

you forgot.

“honey, i am so sorry. i lost track of time. can we still catch that movie? i really want to go on that date with you!”

when damon talked, it seemed like you could hear his smile. he sounded so patience with you, and to be honest, he always was. “it’s no big deal then. why don’t you just come over to my flat to watch a movie? the one at the theater is already closed now.”

you figured, eh, why not, and threw away the crumpled up essay you had crushed between your hands. it was rubbish anyways. at least, this professor of yours would’ve called it that, you assumed.

but you still couldn’t ignore the fact that you were flunking college when you had actually done decently in high school. and when you arrived at damon’s door, your troubles seemed etched onto your face. your heart was plagued of guilt and failure.

“y/n?”

“you don’t know how happy i am to see you.”

“are you sure you’re happy? your eyes are, um, you look like you’re about to cry.”

your boyfriend was right. you felt upset, yes, but you didn’t even notice your eyes becoming glossier. it was embarrassing. your bottom lip quivered, continuing to think about the paper of yours and how you had managed to put an essay above damon.

“no, no! don’t cry! come inside and tell me what’s wrong, alright love?” damon said as he ushered you in and sat you down on the sofa in his tiny little living room.

he curled you up in a blanket and told you that you didn’t have to tell him anything if you didn’t want to, but you reasoned with damon that that was silly. you really did want to get your feelings off your chest. after all, you didn’t open up to anyone about your time at college yet.

“it’s just… they demand so much of me. my college. i wish i could quit but i feel like everyone expects me to graduate and succeed, y’know? i don’t want to constantly be writing over and over again and be told the same critiques that aren’t even useful!”

damon nodded, wrapping you in a tight embrace. you wept a bit, but he didn’t mind. he just continued to hold you.

he let out that cute laugh of his that brought a smile to your face before saying, “you’re succeeding, love. trust me. just because you’re not doing well academically doesn’t mean you’re not the best, right? when people come over to me after i hug you on a show night, they laugh and go ‘albarn, who’s she?’, and i have the pleasure of calling you my girlfriend. not to mention, you had better teachers at high school to help you instead of that posh professor of yours.”

and that made you cry a bit more as he began tearing up with you.

“i’ll always be here for you, no matter what.”

[acourtofsnakes]

Cabur - Rogue, Chapter 6| The Mandalorian x Force Sensitive! Reader (f)

Summary: A few weeks have passed and after landing on a small planet to collect a bounty, you and Mando decide to take a little trip to the market to stock up on some things. Nothing will come up here.. right?

Warnings: Angsty angsty annnnngst, (Sorry, I don’t mean to be so horrible to dear reader), Swearing (mild), brief mentions of death, touching on the same things as chapter 4 but not as heavy but I’ll still add the trigger warnings ♥︎ These chapters will get lighter, I promise,

Not beta read, I wanted to get this one out because I love it so apologies for any mistakes, I’ll be going in to edit a little later

Trigger warnings: Anxiety, horrible thoughts/insults, triggering comments maybe, thoughts of not being able to cope. 

Words: About 6210

AN: Okay, okay, so, I was listening to my Rogue playlist on Spotify (link coming soon) and a certain song came on that just fuelled this chapter. SO, I highly recommend listening to Leave A Light On by Tom Walker if you want the vibes for this chapter. Just… honestly, please do it (I may have had tears)

As always, credit to whoever owns the gif. I usually find them on Google or Pinterest, so message me if it’s yours ♥︎

Rogue Taglist:  @snipskixandbeskar   @weirdowithnobeardo @the-bottom-of-the-abyss

Rogue Masterlist | Introduction| 1: Solus| 2: Arir | 3: Tor | 4: Gaa'tayl | 5: Kyr’am | 6: Cabur |

Mando’a translation: Cabur - Protector or Guardian

A few weeks had passed since that night you saved the Mandalorian’s life, since he threw away the bounty puck to keep you safe. 

You’d stayed that night grounded, and then when Mando was able to get up in the morning, he flew you off of that dump of a planet. 

He didn’t ask anymore but how you had managed to save him. Whether he knew you were lying or not, he hadn��t pushed it, choosing instead to respect you. Kind of like how you respected him and his Creed. 

You’d fallen into a sort of routine around the Razor Crest, without either of you realising it. Mando would fly the ship, and you could be found seeing to Grogu and Duru, or tidying things up. Sometimes you would clean the weapons in the cabinet, making sure they stayed in pristine condition. 

Now and then, Mando would head out to get a bounty and when he got back, he would let you help patch him up. You never saw his bare skin, respected that. You would look away or close your eyes, pointing out the best things to use or how to administer them. The man was good at first aid, but his answer to everything was to shove the cauteriser on it. So, when you had been passing through some shops one day, you had stocked up on medical supplies, even found a shop selling the same herbs and plants that your mother had taught you about. 

You’d even been on a few of the hunts with him. 

Of course, you had argued first. When you’d asked him about it one day on the way out of Nevarro, Mando had simply said no. 

Which had immediately riled you. You were not a girl who liked that word. You despised that word. 

Which is how you’d spent the whole night and next two days bickering, over the question of your safety. When he lost that front, (“Seriously, Mando? I’m a fugitive. And after all, I’ve got a big, strong Mandalorian to protect me”) the Mandalorian had moved on to your lack of thinking before throwing yourself into the firefight.

He lost that one too. 

(“Says the man who stole back a child surrounded by Stormtroopers.”

“You’re not coming. End of.”

“Did you want me to bring your pulse rifle over?”

“Are you even listening to me?”

“You’re right. Pulse rifle and an extra blaster.”

“I hate you, you know that?”

“Sure you do, Lori. I’ll see you at the ramp.”)

That nickname had slipped out by accident, and he’d regarded you, for a long time. He’d gone still, and you almost swore you heard a hitch of breath through his helmet and then he just nodded and murmured softly, “See you down there.”

There had been a lot of little moments like that but they were so fleeting that you were almost convinced you’d imagined it. You were imagining a lot of things lately. 

Sometimes, when you were walking through forests or towns, you thought you spotted something lingering at the edges of your vision. 

A tall figure, cloaked in a hood that was embroidered in either silver or gold, depending on the light. 

You’d even asked Mando about it a few times, but he hadn’t seen anything so you simply put it down to a trick of the light or sleeplessness, nightmares still plaguing you now and then. 

Regardless of the nightmares and your vision playing tricks on you, you were doing… okay. You were warm, safe, had a comfy place to sleep. You had things to keep you busy, things that weren’t hunting for food or a good spot to hunker down in for the night. 

Duru was happy too, having become fast friends with Grogu and the two of them ran rings around you and the Mandalorian. Well, mainly Mando, which you found hilarious because he was such an exasperated dad with them both. 

It was a rare reprieve from your life, letting you slow down and… live. Rather than survive. 

~~

“I do not talk in my sleep.” 

“Yes, you do!! Sometimes, I think you’re awake but you’re just having a fully-fledged conversation with your blanket.” 

“Oh, shut up. I know I don’t talk in my sleep, tin can. You were probably just having dreams about me again.” You examined the fruit in front of you, then handed over a few credits to the kind vendor, slipping the fruit in your bag. 

The sound of fabric hitting the floor sounded from behind you, and you turned to see that the Mandalorian had dropped the bag you’d made him carry. “I do NOT have dreams about you!” He stooped to pick up the bag, then rose to see you standing with your hands on your hips, eyebrow raised and that damn smirk on your lips. 

“Mmhm, is that why you always have to pull something over your lap when I wake you up?”

He stared at you, and you had the very correct feeling that he was looking at you in mild shock, too caught out to come up with his usual cocky response. “I -you.. That’s completely..”

You burst out laughing, rolling your eyes at him and then dropping him a wink, “Come get me when you’ve thought of a response, Lori.” You turned and carried on walking through the market. 

The two of you had stopped off on a nearby trading planet, to gather supplies. Mando had recently secured a bounty with your help and it had paid well, giving you enough extra credits to stock up and treat yourselves. Grogu was already half-way through a packet of blue macarons, which would no doubt come back to bite you both later when he was pelting through the ship whilst you tried to catch him. And it would be your fault because you had taken one look at those big ears and eyes, determined not to break but when the little womp rat had cooed at you… Of course, he had gotten his own way. 

It felt good, to wander a market and not be scrounging for things under the cover of a hooded cloak. You still had one on, you couldn’t bear to part with this item, the most beautiful piece of clothing you had ever had. You just didn’t have the hood up disguising you. 

A gift, from Mando. 

The first time you went out with him after the puck was destroyed, Mandalorian had insisted you wear yours. However, it had been covered in his blood from his injury, and you couldn’t get it out, no matter how hard you had tried. It hadn’t bothered you that much, though you were.. not sad as such, but it felt a little strange because it had been one of your few possessions for so long. But, maybe it was a symbol. That things had changed, and that was in the past. 

A couple of days later, you had just walked into the cockpit when you noticed there was a package on your seat. When you picked it up, it was squishy, bound in a sort of thick papery material and tied with a length of string. 

You’d glanced at the Mandalorian, who was watching you, the picture of calm but his hands had been fiddling with something on his belt, a shockingly nervous gesture you weren’t used to. 

That simple, uncertain gesture had risen your pulse and you unwrapped the package, trying not to show how your hands were shaking at the first gift you’d received since being a child. 

A gift from the Mandalorian. 

Pulling away the paper had revealed a mass of fabric, a blue so deep it was almost the same colour as the night sky. You’d lifted it out and it had unfolded and revealed itself to be a new cloak. The material was soft, thick enough to keep out a biting chill. You’d made a noise of awe and surprise, but had immediately fallen in love with it, pulling it on. It fell to about the middle of your calves and secured at the base of your neck with a small silver clasp. 

The inside was lined with a thin layer of heat-reflective material, and when you’d run a hand over it, Mando had finally broken his silence, “I noticed you were always cold, even if you had layers on so I.. wanted to make sure you weren’t cold anymore..” 

You swore you could almost feel the heat creeping up his neck, and that softened you. He was nervous about giving you this cloak, like he didn’t know how you would take it. 

You had smiled at him, a soft smile that made your eyes glitter like the surrounding stars and placed a hand on his knee lightly, “Thank you, Lori. I adore it, I truly do.” Then you’d spent the next minutes admiring it, putting the hood up and realising it shielded your face in shadow. 

So, naturally, you had moved around the cockpit and upper level like a phantom, pretending to be a shadow in the night. 

You’d even earned yourself a laugh from the great wall of beskar that was fast becoming your friend.  It was only a soft chuckle, just picked up by the vocoder, but all the same, it had lit something within you. 

It still echoed in your ears now. 

A few moments later, the Mandalorian was back at your side, Grogu in his little bag and Duru walking next to him. “The point still stands. I thought I might finally get some silence at night, but you talk just as much.” His raspy voice had a softened edge, one of teasing and you might even have heard the hints of a smile playing at his lips. 

You turned to look at him over your shoulder, “You love it when I talk. I have to talk to you, otherwise I’d be worried you had turned to stone. You’re so quiet sometimes.” You stopped at a stall, admiring the fabrics here – not to buy, just to look at the different things in a place you had never seen before. 

The Mandalorian made a soft noise, “No, sweetheart, that’s just called quiet time. You might want to try it sometime.”

You opened your mouth to speak, but something behind Mando caught your eye. Rising up on tiptoe, you peered over his shoulder… but there was nothing there. Weird. You could have sworn you saw someone wearing a hood just… watching you. 

You shrugged, assuming you had imagined it like before and then looked back to the man before you, “I can be quiet. I just choose to fill your hours with my wonderful voice.” You flashed him a grin, eyes dancing. 

A voice cut across before Mando could talk to you, “You.” It was a snarl, tinged with recognition that wasn’t exactly the most positive. It was bitter, aggressive and almost… pained. 

Mando turned quickly, his hand flying toward the blaster on his hip, instinct overriding him. His movement allowed you to see who had just interrupted the conversation. 

A lady stood there, with curly magenta hair twisted up into a braid. She had tattoos along her neck, and her eyes were a shocking green. She was breathing quickly, staring at you with such disdain that it made your neck prickle. 

How did you know this woman? You’d never been to this planet before.

You blinked, holding up your hands as a surrender gesture, “Uh… I’m sorry but I don’t know you. I think you must have me confused with someone else…”

The lady shook her head fiercely, making the whisps of her hair that had escaped bounce wildly. “No. I do not have you confused. I would know you anywhere.” Her eyes were wild with fury, pinning you to the ground with just a stare. 

“I’m sorry, but I really don’t know who you are. Maybe you could tell me your name?” You extended a hand, trying to diffuse this situation and help the woman understand that you aren’t who she thinks. 

She flinched back from your reach, even though she was still a good few feet away. “How dare you. You don’t even know who I am?” She made a noise of disgust, looking you up and down in such a way that you were surprised the skin didn’t flay from your bones, “Typical. I don’t know why I’m surprised. She was probably just another tool to you, wasn’t she? Another person to use and discard like trash.”

You blinked, your hands dropping to your sides. Your skin began to tighten, your blood turning a little frosty. You looked to the side, seeing a few people start to stop and watch this altercation happen. 

The Mandalorian seemed to pick up on this at the same time as you. He turned more toward the lady, his hand still within reach of his blaster, “Why don’t we take this somewhere more private?”

The woman barely even looked at him, “Don’t get involved in this, Mandalorian. You’re just as bad as she is. At least to do what you do, you have to have respect and creed. You have morals, no matter how murky they are.” She jabbed a finger at you, “Unlike this savage monster.”

Your breathing immediately shallowed, getting a little unsteady as she spat out that word, that hateful word that followed you around and hounded at your feet. “I’m sorry? For whatever I’ve done, I’m sorry if it’s hurt you. I didn’t mean it, truly-”

She laughed, a cold and cruel laugh, but her eyes were slowly turning glassy with tears. She took a few steps closer, “You don’t even remember her name, do you? Shall I remind you? Help you distinguish her from your kill list?” 

You didn’t fail to notice the way the Mandalorian’s stance shifted. His body tightened and he stood closer, shielding you slightly with one of those ridiculously broad shoulders. He was going on the defensive, feeling the situation start to spiral. 

The woman barely spared him another glance, “3 years ago, you showed up on Trask. You stumbled around the market for a few days, bleeding from a wound in your leg and you passed out.”

Realisation was beginning to filter through you. It sparked in your mind and you remembered a dark street and rain, your leg heavy and cumbersome beneath you. It had burned like fire and when you went down, you couldn’t get back up again. 

The woman was still talking, “Someone picked you up, took you to their home. My sister. She was there for work, and saw you lying in the street, like some kind of dumped animal. She nursed you back to health, gave you somewhere to stay.” She could see it as it began back to you, “You took her aid, her comfort and then, there was a warning put out in the village. There had been a high-risk fugitive spotted in the village. Anyone with information was to come forward immediately.”

Your hands curled into fists, your chest shuddering as guilt and darkness began to swirl within you, “Stop.” 

She chose not to hear your quiet plea, “I was supposed to meet her. But she sent me a comms message. She would meet me, but she would have someone else with her. Someone who she couldn’t tell me over a comms message. Someone in trouble. People said this girl was dangerous, to be handed over with no hesitation but she didn’t see that. No, she said this girl was terrified, that she just wanted to live.” She tilted her head, walking closer again, “But the next day, this special little girl was gone. And then the Imperials came.” Her voice shook, her expression unreadable. 

You shook your head mutely, not wanting to hear this, memories flooding your brain. 

“Someone had tipped them off that my sister was harbouring a fugitive. They tore through her home, destroyed it and dragged her in for questioning. They demanded she tell them, beat her when she denied it. She never gave it up.” 

The woman was right in front of the Mandalorian now, who extended his arm out, ‘That’s close enough.” 

Nausea roiled your stomach, and you weren’t sure if you were going to pass out or throw up. There were too many eyes on you, too many people watching as this woman revealed you bit by bit. 

The woman lowered her voice, deadly soft and it shook, but carried in the silent square, “My sister was murdered because of you. Because of what you are.” 

Mando froze, his head tilting back to look at you slightly. You still hadn’t told him. 

She wasn’t done. “They told me a few weeks ago that you’d been captured by a Mandalorian. I wept with relief that day, because I knew the Mandalorian wouldn’t fail. You’d be taken to whoever wanted you, and you would finally repent for every single sin you’ve ever committed. Your life is littered with them. My sister, my beloved sister is dead because of you. A killer. A beast. Your hands are stained red, girl, and they will always be stained red. I admit, I’m disappointed that you slithered into his head with your poison too but you will kill him too and then… You deserve everything that will ever come to you. And more.” The woman was breathing almost as quickly as you, her eyes glinting in sick delight at the pain she was causing you. 

My sister is dead because of you. 

A beast.

Her words mingled with that seductively dark voice in your mind and you gasped for a breath, knives feeling like they were digging into your lungs. Your eyes darted around, noted the strangers looking at you with horror and that shared disgust. A father pushed his daughter behind his legs as he caught your stare, hissing at you. 

A flinch ran down your body and without a second thought, you turned tail and bolted. The sunlight was too bright, obscuring your vision harshly and making you stumble every now and then. 

You were distantly aware of a male’s shout, then a harsh thumb and the Mandalorian’s voice snarling, “Stay down.” He stopped to check your pursuer was down and then he was running after you. “Hey, wait.”

You ignored him, boots pounding into the dust as you ran through the market, needing to get out of this place, get away from her and the memories. Where the hell was the ship? It was right here a minute ago. I haven’t gone the wrong way. This is the way we came. 

You could still hear Mando behind you, knew he was hot on your heels. “Drop it, Mando.” You led him around people and stalls, knowing if wanted to be in front of you, he would be. He was letting you flee, stopping anyone coming after you. 

Dodging around a crate of fruit, you almost sobbed. There it was, the Crest, gleaming in the sunlight. You slowed down as you reached it, stopping a little way away to let the ramp come down, let you inside to sanctuary. 

Nothing happened. 

Bastard. 

You took a breath, trying to get past the tightness in your lungs, “Let me in.”

“No. Not until you tell me what’s going on.” His voice was firm, arrogant, in a way like he knew best and you’d listen to him. 

~“A killer. A beast. Your hands are stained red.”~

Your hands curled into fists at your sides, staring at the Crest, at where the ramp was tucked in tight. Your heart was pounding, not from the run, but from the realisation that no matter where you went, there would always be someone you had touched with that curse. “No. I’m not telling you anything. I don’t owe you anything.”

He laughed behind you, but it was a cool laugh, nothing humorous in it, “I’m not saying you owe me anything, princess. But some woman just cornered you in the street and spat abuse at you. I thought I would be prying you off of her, not chasing after you.” 

A wolf. No. A beast.

You spun round, eyebrow raised, “Because I’m some wild animal that would rather fight than talk my way out of a situation?” 

If he had no helmet, you would have seen him blink, “No, I’m not saying that. But, well. You have to admit it, don’t you?”

Something was beginning to prickle up the back of your neck, his words threatening to cut a little close, “Admit what?” Venom laced your tone and you tensed, as if bracing for a punch.

The Mandalorian walked closer, oozing confidence like he somehow knew you better than you knew yourself, “You don’t really think, do you? You never calculate the risks of a fight. You just jump straight in with no regard for your own safety. I mean, when I came for you on Sorgan, anyone smart would have seen a Mandalorian and run.” He wasn’t saying it in an arrogant way, he was saying it as fact. And he was right. A Mandalorian appeared on the street and you turned around and crossed to the other side. You didn’t engage him a fight and flirt with him. 

A cold laugh rocked though you and you tilted your head, “Anyone smart? So you’re calling me stupid now? Is that it? Beast or stupid?” You took a few steps closer to him, ignoring the villagers milling around that had started to look, having heard the fight in the centre of the market. “Don’t you dare tell me I don’t calculate risks. You think I’ve had time to calculate risks in my life? I don’t have time to sit with my little notepad in my ship and jot down the pro’s and con’s of engaging in battle. I didn’t have the luxury of being trained like you.”

Bitter astonishment filled the Mandalorian’s voice, his own body going rigid, “The luxury of training?! You think I chose to become a Mandalorian? That I woke up one morning and skipped along to Mandalorian school?” His voice rose, the rough rasp turning to stone with every word.

You observed him with a steely gaze, something in you needing to push him away, to protect yourself before he got too close. So, you aimed for what you knew would work, his Creed. Your eyebrows rose, looking him up and down as you leaned your weight on one leg, “You’re telling me you weren’t born with that thing already stuck on your head?” Spiteful sarcasm dripped from your voice and you pointed up at his helmet. 

The Mandalorian let out a snarl that no doubt usually sent normal people running. He stalked toward you with predatory grace, a hunter toward his prey.  “Don’t you dare.” Like he read in your eyes where you were going with this. 

Ugly triumph filtered though you as you stood your ground, not afraid of him, “It’s all the same with you Mandalorians, isn’t it. You have all your training, don your shiny armour and suddenly you’re better than anyone. That helmet goes on, you don’t have to face the consequences of what you’ve done. No one knows who you are, so you don’t need to take the blame.” These words were spiteful, beyond cruel and you hated yourself more and more for each one, but he was starting to get into the cracks, starting to see you. You couldn’t see him die. 

Mando was right in front of you now, towering above you with all his broad-shouldered posture, frustration roiling off of him in waves. “You think I don’t feel remorse for what I’ve done?” His voice was so low, barely leashed. 

You nearly purred, tasting the promise of a fight, even if it did twist a knife into your heart. “I’ve never seen it.” You tilted your head back to look up at him, letting every ounce of spoilt, cruel brattiness melt into your expression. 

A soft growl rumbled through the helmet, so muted you barely heard it in the noises of the market behind him. 

Yes. Yes.

And then he relaxed, his shoulders eased and his hands uncurled. 

What? No – Disappointment, maybe even shock registered on your expression. You’d been sure, so sure that aiming for his beloved Creed would get him to fight you. Why hadn’t it worked?

Mando shook his head, the sunlight bouncing off of the shiny metal, “No. I’m not doing this with you. You can’t push me away, no matter how hard you try. You don’t mean anything that you just said, I can see it in your eyes.” He pressed a button on his vambrace, and the ramp opened behind you. 

He saw you. 

That dark beast was starting to awaken, its ears pricking up. You needed to get out of here, away from him, away from this, now. You just shook your head, turning around and walking up the ramp, watching Duru as she ran ahead of you. 

Footsteps sounded from behind you as the Mandalorian followed you. He took Grogu from his little pouch, popping him on a cargo crate and Duru immediately jumped up next to him. “Don’t walk away from me. I’m trying to help you, but you keep shutting me out. Why did that woman say those things about you?” His gloved hand enveloped your wrist, his grip not tight or authoritative, but it began to break something in you. 

“Let me go, Mando. I mean it.” You let ice creep into your tone, trying to disguise the cracking inside you, the darkness that was beginning to stir and whisper. 

And the damn tin can saw it all. Your back was to him, but he still fucking knew, “Please… You know I would never judge you for it, for whatever you did to make her say that.”

Excuse me?

Anger flared through you now, igniting into a blaze and you snarled, “Whatever I did?!” You didn’t give him time to respond, not before you swung around, using his grip on your wrist for leverage. You had spent enough time around him now to become familiar with the plates of his armour, so you knew you aimed correctly when your fist connected with the side of his ribs between the front and back plates. 

He grunted, jolting a little but he still didn’t let go. “Hey, I didn’t mean it like that. I only meant-” His voice had softened and, in your rage and hurt, you mistook the pleading tone for a condescending one. 

Before he could finish, you punched him again, harder, “Don’t. Don’t try to start spewing excuses at me. I knew perfectly well what you meant. You thought that she had been hurt by me. That I killed her sister with my own hands. Probably slit her throat and bathed in her blood.”

“No, no, I didn’t. If you would just listen to me and stop shouting, please-“

Your foot connected with his shin, making him stumble backwards. You followed after him, “You didn’t even stop to think that maybe, for once, I didn’t actually do anything. But no. Like always, you looked at me and saw the worst. You assumed that I was a monster.” You chopped down at his inner elbow this time, causing him to let go of you in reflex. 

Mando tilted his head, his voice coming out sharper this time, “I assumed?” He laughed, the bastard laughed, “What else am I supposed to do, sweetheart? You’ve been on this ship for nearly a month now and I still don’t know anything about you. So yes, I was wrong for assuming, but can you blame me?”

Your eyes flashed and you were on him again, “So it’s my fault that you thought I was a monster? You’d met me for all of two seconds on Sorgan and started whispering in my ear like honey, that death followed me wherever I went. There was a bounty over my head and that’s all you saw.” 

Mando went still, his shoulders tightened, and his voice came out lower, “You’re still bringing that up? I told you that you weren’t my bounty anymore.”

Before you could answer him, that velvety voice inside your head started to whisper in your ear, “Oh no, oh my sweet darling. He sees you. The real you.  He knows you’re a monster.” 

You shook your head sharply, lifted your eyes back to the Mandalorian’s stupid face. Helmet. Visor. Whatever. “I’m not your bounty but you believed that woman. So say it.”

His confusion was palpable, “Say what?”

You took a step forward and your chest butted up against his, “Say it! Say that I’m a monster. A murderer. I kill everything I come near.” You laughed, coldly, the words coming out with your voice but in your head, they were being repeated in that cruel, silken whisper. “You regret it, don’t you? Throwing away my puck. You wish you’d kept it, then you could get rid of me, be free of what I’ve done, why I’m being hunted.” Those steel bands were still wrapped round you, crushing you, swallowing you whole again. 

Something broke in him, his composure as the anger rose again and he leaned down to you, “Stop.” The command was a growl and he lifted a finger, pointing at you, “You’re a fucking hypocrite.” 

Yes. Yes, fight back, fight me. Tell me what I know I am. 

You raised your eyebrows, smirking at his finger and then back up at him but your expression was bitter, “Am I? Why’s that, Mando?” You tilted your head and practically purred, “Tell me.” 

The tension in the room was tight, the air almost crackling around you with this outburst of emotion, the threads of your entwined lives pulling taut. 

The light bounced off of the plates on his shoulders, betraying his slightly ragged breathing, “You just screamed at me for assuming the worst about you, yet you did just that to me. How can I want to be free of you, when I don’t even know who you are.” He lifted his hands to your shoulders, to try and calm you down, to push you away maybe. 

The smirk began to slip from your face, “Does it matter who I am?”

His grip tightened, “Of course it does. Because you’re not a bad person. Let me help you, please. Just tell me something. Anything.” His voice turned pleading, and he lifted a hand from your shoulder, like he was going to cup your cheek. 

You’re not a bad person.

Fire blazed within you again, protective and destructive. This was too close. He was getting too close. You had to stop it, now. You had to get away. 

You reached up, grabbing his wrist and using the element of surprise to slam him against the wall behind him, pinning his wrist there and then your blade was at his neck, dull light glinting off of it, “Back off. You can’t help me. I’m not some broken doll to add to your ragtag collection.” Your own breathing was ragged, coming in sharp pants as the room started to spin. 

The Mandalorian flinched, like you’d hit a nerve and his free hand moved. Bingo. 

Yes, you thought, almost begged, Punch me. Fight me, please. 

But he didn’t. He just curled his fingers around your wrist and pushed you away, dislodging your knife and knocking you back a few steps. Like you were weak.

You couldn’t do this, he was starting to slip through the cracks that were forming in you. He was looking at you, seeing you. He always had, from the moment you were nothing but hunter and prey, he knew exactly how to get through your intricately woven net of silver-tongued quips and cocky arrogance. 

No. 

Your voice cracked, echoes of the dark beast’s laughter in your ears “No! Stop pushing me away, stop taking it. Fight me!!” You surged for him again, your hands curling into fists, slamming against the beskar plates again and again. 

You didn’t care that it hurt, that it made pain explode across your knuckles. 

You liked it, you liked the pain. Deserved that and so much more. 

And the Mandalorian… just stood there. He shook his head, just slightly, “No.” He stood there as you hammered your fists against his chest, even when you started to kick him. Just watched as your eyes became glassier, your punches harder but less accurate. 

Why wasn’t he fighting you? 

Your hazy mind began to overwork, searching for something, anything to provoke him, “Why? You don’t want to fight a girl? Too proud are you?” You slammed your knee into his, pulled at the armour plates, honed your pain and fury into him but he just absorbed it. “You’re as weak as I am, you’re running too. You’re the hypocrite, Mandalorian, not me.” Your words were stilted, made no sense as you spat out words as cruel as you could, just needing to provoke him. 

Nothing did. Nothing. There was no noise in the cargo hold but the sounds of the people outside, beeping, the dull thud of your fists, your spiteful words and your own ragged breathing. 

And the whispering in your head that had turned into a full-on symphony of bitter taunts and sniping truths. It rose with memories, flashes of your dead parents, the battered bodies of those that had tried to help you, people who had been caught in the cross-hairs of your life. Innocent people that had turned into nothing more than collateral damage. 

Blood had started to smear on the beskar, your knuckles splitting open with the repeated impact. You could hear Duru meowing, Grogu gurgling in worry but you didn’t care. 

The beast and its army rose, tasting the scent of blood and bringing you visions of the future, of the Mandalorian, dead on the ground. The blood from your fists turned into his own, painting the ground red. Duru, fur soaked in scarlet and Grogu, his tiny little body broken on the floor in a pool. 

And above them, you stood, soaked in the blood of these three. Relishing in the pain and torture that you had caused. You could taste their blood. 

The room began to spin further, the whispering detonated into a roar and it unleashed a heavy roiling cloud within you. It choked you, squeezed fists around your lungs, clouded your eyes and snuck into your head. It whispered to you, such cruel taunts, sucking out the deepest, most vile thoughts you had about yourself and spat them back out, combined with these visions of the future. It leeched the energy out of you and with a choked sob, your knees gave way. 

Duru let out a yowl of concern, springing off of the cargo box. 

I can’t do this anymore. I can’t be confident, or strong. I can’t be brave and cocky, I can’t keep throwing myself into every fight, I can’t run anymore. I can’t do this. I can’t-

And then a pair arms caught you. 

Mando caught you. He didn’t haul you up against him. He didn’t try and pull you up. 

No, he sunk to the floor with you, supporting your weight in his own body, leaning against the wall and letting you collapse against him. 

You froze, your body stiffened as he did. This… people didn’t touch you like this. They didn’t put their arms around you unless they were trying to drag you somewhere. 

You hadn’t been hugged since you were a child, and yet here you were. The Mandalorian was holding you, but loosely. 

Waiting, for your consent. For you to be okay with this. 

And as his gloved hand brushed your back, such a tender warmth broke through you, caressed your pain and you couldn’t resist. You sunk into him, the last saps of energy leaving you as tears flooded your cheeks. The armour was hard, digging into you a little bit, but the feeling of just being held was more than enough. 

He wrapped his arms around you, coaxing you against his chest. His legs were either side of you, one stretched out on the floor and the other resting up to support your back. Distantly, you were aware of four clawed feet padding over your lap, Duru settling into the space between you and Mando’s arm. 

The armour disguised the frantic beating of his heart, your tears and shaking of your body held the trembling of his own hands, but he didn’t mention it. Didn’t mention the fact that this was the first time he had held someone like this that wasn’t the kid… since he was a child himself. He was just as starved of touch as you, even more so because he had no skin-to-skin contact either. He could feel your warmth through the fabric of his clothes that weren’t covered, could feel the weight of you leaning into him. 

He didn’t speak, just held you in the dimness of the cargo hold, keeping you together as you fell apart, kept the promise of death away, just as you had done for him. 

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[sisterspooky1013]

Only One Choice, Part 2, Chapter 16

Read it here on AO3 / Tagging @today-in-fic

May passes into June and they quietly acknowledge that it has been one year since the day Mulder walked into the autopsy bay. They spend their weekends watching movies, making love, and hanging out with the Gunmen, Missy often in attendance as she and Byers become somewhat of an item. Every other Sunday they have lunch with her mother, Mulder meeting Bill by way of an awkward phone call and a promise that they will come out to visit San Diego sometime soon. The moratorium on weekday overnights fades away and the days they spend in each other’s beds begin to outnumber those that they don’t.

One day in early August, Mulder laments how lonely Priscilla gets when he’s gone for the night, crying and following him from room to room when he comes home and plaguing him with guilt. Scully suggests that he bring her over with him, setting up a litter box and food bowl in an unused corner of the living room. Without the daily need to care for a cat, he spends more and more time at her apartment, his suits taking over half her closet and his T-shirts occupying one of her drawers. He still has his fish to feed and so they can tell themselves that they don’t technically live together, though it’s been weeks since anyone slept at his apartment. The excitement of new love gives way to the familiar comfort of domesticity, questions about their lives prior to meeting morphing into what they’re having for dinner and whether someone can pick up toilet paper on the way home from work. They each visit the doctor for a full workup and, everything coming back clear, stop using condoms, relying on the progestin shot Scully goes in for every three months to prevent pregnancy.

Far from boring, they find worthy sparring partners in one another, debating everything from whether the moon landing was a hoax to the merits of String Theory, arguing their points of view passionately before they agree to disagree and then let their clothes fall to the floor. They discover the things they love best about one another; Mulder’s unrelenting curiosity and Scully’s bottomless compassion, as well as those they like the least; his forgetfulness when he’s focused on something and her tendency to shut him out when she’s upset. Whether completing a crossword puzzle together or watching Jeopardy, they embrace the ways that they are different and how they balance one another out; his creativity to her order, her planning to his impulsivity, his acceptance to her skepticism. Yin and yang, tall and small, bold and tempered; there is a completeness in their union that makes them each feel whole.

Even in their intensity and their commitment, Mulder has never again uttered the words ‘I love you’ and Scully has never said them at all. Far from a red flag or a hesitance to be vulnerable, they simply don’t feel the need to express it aloud. She knows he loves her when he drives forty minutes out of his way to pick up her favorite donuts or reads the latest issue of JAMA just so he can discuss the articles with her. He knows she loves him when she indulges him in theoretical discussions on the mating rituals of Sasquatch, not bothering to point out that the creature doesn’t exist, or wastes entire Saturdays watching movies that were bad enough to earn Razzies because he finds poorly made films entertaining.

Scully has never met Mulder’s parents, accepting his explanation that his mother is cold and his father distant, which is why she feels caught off guard when he calls her at work on a Tuesday to tell her that his mother had a stroke, and he is on his way to the hospital. He doesn’t ask her for anything, but she leaves work anyway, approaching the reception desk of the emergency department with a level of calm only a doctor is capable of.

“I’m looking for Teena Mulder, she should have been admitted within the last few hours,” she says to the young woman behind the desk.

“Yes, she’s here,” the woman answers, “but visiting hours don’t start until 4:00 and someone is already with her now. Are you family?” The woman looks at her expectantly.

“Um, no, I’m not,” she replies, not bothering to explain that Tenna Mulder is her boyfriend’s mother, who she’s never met.

“You can take a seat then,” the woman says with a well-practiced smile that doesn’t reach her eyes.

She finds an empty seat and pulls in a deep breath, taking out her cell phone in hopes she can reach Mulder, though cell reception in hospitals is notoriously bad.

“Excuse me, are you Dana?” someone says from a few seats away, and she turns to see an older man, perhaps in his sixties, with receding dark brown hair and tired bags under his eyes.

“Yes,” she replies, eyeing him skeptically as he rises from his seat and takes the one just beside her.

“I’m Bill Mulder, Fox’s father,” he says, offering his hand.

She takes it, scanning him for similarities to Mulder and finding none, other than his complexion and hair color.

“Oh, hello, it’s nice to meet you Mr. Mulder,” she stumbles, a bit confused. As Mulder tells it, his parents are divorced and not on friendly terms.

“Please, you can call me Bill,” he says with a small smile, and she nods. “Fox is with her now, though I don’t think she’s awake,” he offers.

They sit in awkward silence, Scully realizing she has absolutely no information with which to start a conversation. Mulder has told her nothing about his parents, aside from the details relevant to his sister’s abduction. She doesn’t know what Bill Mulder does, or did, for a living, or where he lives. Just when she’s considering going home, Mulder emerges from a set of double doors.

He was clearly looking for his father, but when he sees Scully his eyebrows knit and his chin puckers in relief. She stands and he scoops her up, squeezing her so tight it hurts.

“Thank you for coming,” he whispers hoarsely into her ear.

They part, hands clasped, and he addresses his father.

“Mom just woke up, you can go see her soon, but since Scully is here I’d like to take her back first.”

Scully gives him an incredulous look.

“Mulder, I’m sure your mom doesn’t want to meet me for the first time from a hospital bed,” she pleads.

“I know, but I want you to look at her chart. I just want to make sure that what the doctors are saying is accurate,” he says with desperate eyes, and she nods.

He leads her back through the double doors and into a room where a tall white-haired woman is reclining in the bed, an oxygen cannula tucked under her nose. While she saw little resemblance between Mulder and his father, the likeness to his mother is almost jarring; her stately nose and hooded eyes curating in Scully an immediate fondness for her. She blinks slowly at them, confusion furrowing her brow.

“Mom, this is Dana,” he says, and her expression shifts into one that is slightly pained.

She attempts to speak, one side of her mouth rooting for words that she can’t quite find.

“Hi Mrs. Mulder, I’m sorry we’re meeting under these circumstances,” Scully offers, “I’m a medical doctor, Fox asked me to take a look at your chart, if that’s okay?”

Teena nods and closes her eyes, and Scully goes to retrieve her chart from near the door. After she’s looked it over, they say goodbye and return to the lobby to find Mulder’s father.

“Go ahead, Dad, I’ll see you in there,” Mulder says, and then walks Scully to her car.

“So, what do you think?” he asks as they stand next to her open car door, worry crumpling his features.

“I don’t see anything out of the ordinary, Mulder. Her stroke was significant, you can see that by the degree to which it’s impacting her speech and gross motor function. It shouldn't get any worse, but she’ll need to go through rehab, and likely need some in-home care for a bit until we know the long term impact. It’s very possible that she’ll be able to continue living independently, but not right away.”

Mulder heaves a big sigh and nods. “I’m gonna stay here for a bit, but I think I’ll be home before you go to bed.”

“Of course, whatever you need,” she replies, bringing her palm to his cheek. “You okay?”

“Yeah, I think so. Thank you, again, for coming down here. You didn’t have to.”

“Mulder, of course I did,” she says with concern. “I’ll see you when you get home, okay?”

He kisses her one, two, three times, pulling her close for a beat, clinging to her for dear life.

“I love you,” he chokes out, and she hugs him tighter.

“I love you too,” she replies, her chin tucked tight into the crook of his neck.

When he releases his grip on her, she brings her hands to his jaw, brushing her thumbs over his cheeks.

“We’ll get through this, okay? We’ll figure it out,” she assures him, and he nods tersely.

——��

She’s in bed reading, Priscilla curled up on her stomach, when she hears the thunk of the deadbolt.

“Mulder?” she calls out, and he pokes his head through the door.

“I’m gonna take a quick shower, I’ll be in in a minute,” he says, then disappears again.

He returns ten minutes later, shower-fresh and warm. She sets her book aside to envelop him in her arms, his head finding a home on her chest as his arms snake around her ribcage.

“How is she?” she asks as she strokes her fingers through his hair and down his neck soothingly.

“The same,” he says with a defeated tone, “they might release her to rehab tomorrow.”

“And how are you?” she asks, giving his neck a little squeeze.

He groans. “I don’t know. I’ve been thinking a lot.”

“About your mom?”

“No,” he says, propping up on his elbow to look at her, “about life, I guess.”

She lifts her eyebrows expectantly, waiting for him to continue.

“I don’t want to toil away in the BSU for the rest of my life, Scully. If I die tomorrow, what will I have to show for it?”

She frowns at him sympathetically.

“You make a difference in the BSU, Mulder. You help catch murderers, prevent further loss of life. It may not seem like it because you’re so far removed from the people it impacts, but you do.”

He flops back onto the bed, eyes on the ceiling.

“You’re probably right, but it still feels pretty pointless.”

“What would you rather be doing?” she asks gently, rolling on to her side to face him.

“Honestly?” he steals a glance at her before continuing, “investigating The X Files. Making progress in understanding what happened to my sister. Working to expose those who are responsible for the coverup of secret government operations.”

“Maybe you should talk to AD Skinner, try again. Maybe The X files could be reopened,” she says softly, brushing her palm over his arm.

Mulder shakes his head. “Nothing has changed, Scully. They won’t let me operate without a partner and no one wants to work with me.”

“I’d work with you, but that’s against bureau policy,” she says with a small smile, and he looks at her with an affectionate gaze.

“I’m sure you’d have a field day debunking all my work,” he says coyly.

“I would never,” she retorts sarcastically.

He rolls back towards her, pulling her close with her head tucked under his chin.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you,” he says, his voice full of emotion.

“Well you do have me, so there’s no point in thinking about it,” she replies.

He sighs deeply, reaching past her to turn off the bedside lamp, and they sleep.

[marchioness-caprina]

I Deserve You

Pairings : Tamaki Amajiki x Reader

Writing Style : 3rd Person

Warnings : Mild Cussing

Word Count : 3091

3rd Person's POV

The Day of the School Festival, After stressful Days of practicing dance moves for the Preparation of Class 1-A's show everything was going smoothly. Everyone was having Fun And Y/n was too. She was playing the Violin while Bakugou played the Drums, Tokoyami and Denki with the guitar, Jiro and y/n also shared the vocals and Momo with the Keyboard.

Y/n was Having Fun seeing all her peers enjoying the show they put on but something was missing and she was desperately searching for a certain someone to watch the show. Mirio was there... But where was Tamaki?.

Y/n was having fun... Was... After finally confirming that Tamaki did not come to watch her mood immediately dampened.

She had been crushing on this 3rd year male from the very beginning and she did not try to hide it. In fact she would go try to catch him in any way, she'd flirt with him, court him, confess to him, give gifts to him but all the boy ever did was Shy away from her, he'd return her gifts and he'd even run away.

Even though y/n would either laugh it off or smile. It hurt pretty damn much. And now she was actually hoping he'd show up to atleast show that he cares but no he was not here.

Her heart dropped knowing fully well that he didn't care. And as their show finally ended. She had a blank expression plastered on her face making her classmates worry.

Because she was always expressive and smiling, her face always filled with emotions and her eyes lively and fiery. But now she looked different.

" Y/n-chan! Are you ok? " Mina was the first to ask and her classmates looked at her having the same question as the pink haired girl.

" Yeah I'm fine... I'm just tired " Y/n tried faking a smile but this time. It was too painful to do.

She was completely smitten for Tamaki.

" Bullshit, it's pretty clear that you aren't. And let's be honest here. When were you actually tired? Never. " Bakugou grumbled as y/n raised her brow gazing at the boy before shrugging her shoulders and walking away ignoring the calls of her classmates.

" Guys... Let's give her some time alone " That was the last comment she heard before she disappeared into the crowd.

She needed to get her mind off of things and what's the better way to do it than eating Takoyaki while watching the beauty pageant held by U.A.

Y/n was surprised to see Nejire senpai showing her talent , Nejire flying from above the ground. She looked beautiful but then y/n heard the familiar voice of the person she was searching for earlier.

" She looks like a fairy... Like this... So happy... And smiling brightly " Those exact words came from Tamaki who was standing beside her and she didn't notice.

Her eyes trailed up to Tamaki's eyed which were concentrated on Nejire's dancing figure and she couldn't believe it. The warmth and.... Love Tamaki's eyes showed while looking at Nejire was painful.

She wanted to do nothing but throw up all the food she consumed and bury herself under the ground. How could she be so blind? Of course Tamaki liked Nejire, He was close to her. They were friends while he and y/n are not, Nejire was powerful, Kind, Smart and very beautiful.

Y/n's heart felt like it had been stung by a thousand needles and she wanted to cry but somehow the tears refused to come out.

After a few moments of Tamaki looking at Nejire he felt someone looking at him and he tried looking around to see who it was and when his eyes landed on a pair of E/c orbs his heart jumped.

Oh no, is he gonna get jumped again by this clingy yet adorable Kohai?.

" Y-y-y/n! " Tamaki stammered jumping back as he strare back at y/n who gave him an unreadable expression.

He was expecting the usual, with y/n clinging onto him and flirting with him till his face turns as red as a tomato but to his shock she just turned around and left.

He was frozen in place. He couldn't comprehend what happened to that girl he began to feel anxious.

' Does she hate me?.... Shouldn't that be good she'll finally leave me alone... Wait someone hating me isn't good!... But.. Why am I so bothered by it? ' he silently thought to himself.

He watched the retreating figure of y/n and he suddenly had a powerful urge to grab her and pull her back .

Meanwhile, y/n who was walking away from the show was about to burst in tears but she slapped herself chanting more than a hundred times that she shouldn't cry.

So she stood strong and sucked it up. Wiping a small droplet of tears that was threatening to spill at any moment.

Maybe it's for the better. She'll find someone else... Hopefully. For now she should try to forget about him and move on. Act like she doesn't know him.

___________________

After that Day everything changed which got everyone questioning.

' What's wrong with y/n?'

She became a little distant and cold it was hard to believe but still, she did show unconditional care and love for her classmates but everyone couldn't help but worry since she never seemed to say anything and if one of them asked, she'd change the subject or walk away like she didn't hear anything.

What shocked them the most was how she had been Avoiding Their senpai, Tamaki like he was the plague or something. Usually she'd be seen hanging with them during lunch or walking with Tamaki during break time but now she isn't. During lunch she sat with the Izuku squad, when she passed by The Big three she'd either take a detour or pretend like she didn't see them in the first place.

Tamaki, Tamaki was conflicted, he was so confused, he felt like his heart was eating him up only to spit it out again, he felt like there was something gone something he longed, something he missed. And he knew it was y/n. He was gloomier than normal and Every time he sees y/n through the halls his heart swells up expecting her to run at him and hug him... Tell him she likes him but no. That's not what happened, what happened was that she avoided him , she ignored him and she pretended like she didn't know him.

And he never knew it hurt this bad he felt so upset he wanted to bang his head on the wall and cry his pain out.

What did he do wrong though?, what got her so worked up to treat him like this? that she made it so painful for him?. Didn't she say she loved him? Then where was all that affection now? Where was that attention she used to shower him with?. Where was his y/n? The one that loved him?.

Did she find someone else? Does she not want him anymore? Did she finally notice that He's not worth her time? Is she finally going to leave him?.

Is This how she felt when Tamaki ignored her? When he ran away from her because his heart couldn't handle so much love knowing he can't hold back for any longer and just kiss her. If this is how it felt like he didn't want it! He wanted her back.

Those negative thoughts were what occupied Tamaki's mind and he never noticed the small droplets of tears trailing down his cheeks that Made Mirio and Hado panic.

" What's wrong Amajiki? " Hado asked and Tamaki couldn't help but muttered his worries.

" .... She doesn't love me Anymore "

" You mean y/n? Nonsense she probably didn't notice you walking by" Mirio tried to comfort his friend but it was no use, He just wanted y/n back.

" For a whole month?.... She didn't notice us for a whole month? She never came to our classroom or ate with us anymore... She didn't wait or approach me down the halls. She didn't even spare me a glance " Tamaki muttered and Mirio was honestly surprised to hear his friend utter a sentence without Stuttering.

This was serious. And somehow they needed to fix this. For Tamaki.

______________

" Ok Class, We'll be training with the Big 3 for the next Week because they'll be grading you based on what they have observed " Aizawa sensei announced and the whole class was hyped. Well most of them.

There was a specific girl who did not appreciate this at all.

And she was y/n.

The big three were standing infront of them with Mirio and Nejire Flashing worried glances at Tamaki.

Tamaki had his eyes on y/n who refused to acknowledge his existence and it hurt so bad.

When she finally did look at him. For the first time in forever he actually had the courage to smile and wave at her but y/n kept a cold facade ignoring his wave and smile and all she did was look back to her side and ignore him.

That action was noticed by everyone in the room.

Even Aizawa sensei who usually acted tough and uncaring was worried for his student because she was acting really out of character.

He questioned her classmates about it and they started explaining what they had noticed and observed too and honestly he hated seeing even One of his children like this and on cue the big 3 but mostly Mirio and Nejire tried to convince him to let the three of them train his students but he knew fully well that it was so Y/n and Tamaki could interact.

He wasn't against the idea since he wanted the same y/n back also.

So he asked permission from principal Nezu who didn't mind the idea at all and it led to this .

" Now each member of the big three will be given an assistant and I'll personally be the one to assign them. Uraraka you'll be Nejire's assistant, Midoriya you'll be Mirio's and Amajiki your assistant will be Y/n--" Aizawa sensei was cut off by y/n who clearly didn't like the idea.

" What? No!... I mean... Pick another assistant... I'm not good at being One " Y/n knew her excuse was lame but that's the best she could do.

However, Her denial made Tamaki Dizzy with nervousness with all the insecurities coming back a pained expression painted on his face as he stared at y/n who stood her ground.

Mirio rubbed Tamaki's Back while whispering.

" It's gonna be ok. You still have a week "

" Well sorry but it's been decided. If you want to back out because you can't handle it then do it but you'll have a failing grade if you do " Aizawa didn't mean to threaten his student but this has gone far enough. She's turning into a cold heartless girl. And he didn't like that.

" Fine.... I'll Do it... " Y/n muttered looking down on her desk.

____________________

3 Days had passed and Tamaki was nowhere near successful. He never knew that y/n could be this cold. If he knew he would never have made her mad in the first place.

Her words stung and it hurt so much he had to hide in the bathroom for an hour to calm down and convince himself that it's fine and that she didn't mean it but she was brutal with her words.

She did a pretty good job not talking to him though and it was extremely hard to even get her to look at him.

He was starting to lose hope, he was planning on a hundred ways of apologizing but somehow none of them were ever successful.

He has two days left to find out and this time he was more than determined to do so.

Aizawa was kind enough to assign him and y/n to clean up the gym after training and still y/n didn't even talk to him. Not even once.

" Y-You K-know y-you're really pretty... Today " Tamaki complimented earning another cold silence from the girl.

He couldn't take it anymore.

He grabbed her arm, turned her around and clung onto her. His arms wrapping around her very being along with y/n's arms restraining her.

Y/n had no idea Tamaki was this strong... No wonder he's part of the big three but that isn't the point right now.

" Let me Go! " Y/n yelled as she began squirming.

" No! " Tamaki yelled back and that only made y/n more violent, wiggling and kicking as much as she could. She kinda felt bad when she heard Pained Grunt from Tamaki.

" D-Do... You Hate me that M-Much? W-what did I Do? " Tamaki's voice was hoarse and broken and then y/n noticed how he was looking at her with big eyes and there running down his cheeks.

" .... " She was speechless.

" Please Answer me... And... And... And I'll finally ... L-leave you alone " Tamaki practically begged as more tears spilled out of his eyes.

" ... Why are you doing this exactly? " Y/n asked and Tamaki slowly let go of her and he kneeled down on the ground unable to contain his emotions. The crippling anxiety attacks he had whenever he felt a powerful surge of emotions slap him the face.

" I-I Love you " He managed to choose out between sobs.

" Really? Don't you Like Nejire? When I was chasing you.. You ran away from me... On the School Festival... I was hoping you'd watch our show but you didn't... I looked for you everywhere and now you say that? Don't lie to me... I heard your comment about Nejire... You managed to watch her show but... Why not ours?.... " This time it was y/n's turn to have tears falling down her soft cheeks as she covered her mouth with the back of her hand to prevent any sobs to escape her lips.

" I d-d-don't like her like that! I thought I should be happy that you're gone but I'm not! I'm miserable! And that D-D-Day at the School festival.... I-I thought of you as a friend but it got me thinking... W-Why would I buy you a custom made bracelet if I only liked you as a friend!?... I didn't manage to watch the show because... I was working extra shift at F-Fatgum's stall to pay for the bracelet I b-bought you.... The reason why I stood beside you during the pageant was because I wanted to give it to you... But y-you walked away before I even had the chance to!... T-Then I finally understood my feelings... Why I made is much effort to design the bracelet myself and have it custom made... It was because I love you!... A-And you started avoiding.... M-M-Me... You started pushing me away and ignoring me... It hurts! It really hurts! I-I though you found someone else... I thought you thought I was pathetic! I t-thought you f-finally r-r-realized that you could do so much better at picking g-guys who aren't me... I had so much negative thoughts running through my head... B-Because I was so scared of l-losing you... " Tamaki forced himself to say how he really efly without stuttering but it was no use. He couldn't help it with all the sobs caught in his throat.

Y/n was speechless then her heart started clenching in pain, her heart dropped to her stomach seeing how much pain she caused him. Realizing How terrible she had been.

One time out of worry she actually went inside the boy's bathroom only to hear Tamaki hyperventilating inside. She was so worried she asked mirio to check on him.

She couldn't help the tears cascading out of her eyes that were red and puffy.

She looked down at Tamaki who was clutching his hand on his chest choking on his own sobs.

She felt so horrible. She sat down infront of him towards her and pressing her lips against his shutting him off. He sobbed in between the kiss but nonetheless he shyly kissed back with tears running down his face. The same with y/n who had tears on her eyes as well.

When she finally pulled back her forehead was pressed against his as she stared at him with loving eyes.

Those eyes.... He missed that... He craved that. The way she looked at him with so much love without judgement.

" You Dumbass.... I don't need a fancy Bracelet... I just wanted you... Nothing could compare to You.... Your simple presence is enough to make me happy... That day... I just wanted you.. And you should know that.... I love you... I'd pick you any day over some fancy bracelet " Y/n smiled and Tamaki who was rendered speechless at what she said crawled closer towards her to connect his lips with hers once again this time he had the courage to dominate the kiss.

He pulled back abruptly as he wrapped his arms around her waist, his chin resting on her shoulder .

" I-I just... W-Wanted you to see... I'm capable... Of giving you things other guys give their g-girlfriends... " Tamaki whispered making y/n chuckle.

" Really tamaki? I wouldn't pick some random rich bastard off the streets... I want my adorable elf boy " Y/n teased as she blew a puff of air against Tamaki's Ear making him shudder as he backed away. His face turning red.

" D-Don't T-Tease " He whimpered as he fished for something in his pocket.

And then he pulled out a Jade bracelet with y/n carved on it and surrounding it were small diamonds.

" Tama... You didn't have to... It's beautiful " Y/n muttered as Tamaki took her hand sliding the bracelet on her wrist.

" I... You deserve better " Tamaki mumbled.

" Yes I deserve better " Y/n stated and tamaki looked up at her his ears twitching in fear expecting her to take it off but instead she had her arms wrap around his neck giving him a peck on his lips.

" Because "

" I Deserve You "

[saffronwritings]

C L U M S Y | I I D A

Never meant to make you fall with me. I let you down - I've been clumsy with your heart again. I guess you figured me out. Now here's a taste of my own medicine. And for all this pain, that I can't explain, there's a black flag wavin' tonight.

I I D A | P a r t  T w o 

[Part One] [Part Three]

C L U M Y  M A S T E R L I S T

Word Count: 3.1k

A/N: i actually did not expect to enjoy writing Iida as much as i did. But it resulted in me writing the second part very quickly LOL. I got such good ideas while I was brainstorming with a friend of mine. Here it be. :) 

Following the rules is all he knew how to do, until he met you.

               To say you were a tad bit disappointed when Iida never showed back up at your dorm to check up on you was a bit of an understatement. You had felt better the next morning after taking the time to rest and take the medicine Recovery Girl had given you. However, even though you were feeling better you didn’t know if you wanted to face the class after the day you had yesterday. Would you be able to face Iida without blushing your brains out? You doubt he had said anything to his other classmates in fear of his reputation as the class rep. Iida wasn’t one for secrets, but you knew he kept a lot of things to himself.

               With a defeated sigh, you decided to get ready slowly for homeroom. You were sure your tie was crooked and that your blazer was not ironed, however, everyone should just be thankful for you showing up. While you felt better you didn’t feel back at 100%, with a bit of a lingering headache to follow your morning routine. Sighing and dragging yourself out of your dorm room, you avoided the obnoxious voice that was Kaminari to keep your migraine at bay. “Look who’s deciding to show up to class today.” Sero announced, making you roll your eyes and give him the middle finger. Although your actions had caused a disgruntled class rep to clear his throat.

               You two made eye contact and quickly you put the finger you were practically shoving in Sero’s face away. “Sorry.” You muttered and headed out towards the main campus. While you knew you should probably have shown up to homeroom early to get the work you missed from Aizawa, you instead decided to go over to get medicine from the Recovery Girl. Sadly, she kept you a lot longer than she should have - taking your temperature, giving you headache medicine, and trying vigorously to give you an icepack to take with you to class. She sent you off with a pack of ice and a late note to give Aizawa.

               When you showed up for class, all eyes were on you. “Ms. Y/L/N! You are late for class again!” You heard Iida say, which almost made you giggle. However, you decided to keep a straight face. You decided not to look at the sea of eyes staring at you and handed the note to Aizawa. “Glad you decided to show.” He stated in an annoyed tone. You turned towards your desk and rolled your eyes at Aizawa’s comment. Before you sat down, you caught the gaze of the stern class rep. “Sorry.” He mouthed, nodding towards Aizawa. Obviously apologizing for yelling out to the class that you were late. You shrugged your shoulders and sat down.

               The medicine was making you extremely drowsy, though you tried to push through at least until homeroom was over. Aizawa was too keen on your antics of trying to skip class that he rarely let you leave the classroom. Present Mic on the other hand was more than easily fooled by your constant skipping. Either that or he was just used to them by now. “I’m glad you’re feeling better, Y/N.” Ochako exclaimed, coming up behind you after class. “I’m still feeling pretty crappy but not as bad as yesterday.” You admitted silently cursing for Ochako walking with you because that gave you less of a chance to sneak off.

               “Iida seemed worried about you enough to be late to class yesterday. Which is surprising coming from him. He usually rarely breaks the rules. You must have been really sick.” She continued, saying her comment as if it weren’t a big deal. You tried to fight the blush that was coming onto your face. “Yeah, I was in pretty rough shape yesterday.” You whispered, trying to get him out of your head. “I’ll meet you in our next class Ochako, I got to get something from my locker.” You lied, immediately dashing away from your fellow student.

               When Iida arrived at his next class, he was half expecting you to be in your seat already. Well, he had hoped. Even though he was trying to avoid you, he still felt drawn to you. Yet, he was still upset that you were not in your assigned seat. Present Mic was setting up the board for whatever they were going to be learning that day. As the clock ticked closer to the start of the class, he became more and more frustrated. Ojiro and Shoji were the last two to arrive in class before the bell rung.

As Present Mic was taking attendance, he checked your seat and just shook his head. “I’m assuming Y/L/N is not coming to class today was well?” He asked in a defeated voice. “She was in homeroom class, and mentioned she needed to grab something from her locker.” Ochako pointed out, making Iida roll his eyes. Of course, you were going to be late to yet another class. Iida thought to himself, shaking his head and pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. As time in class had passed and he still recognized your absence, he decided he was going to go looking for you.

After asking Present Mic permission to go to the bathroom, he had set off towards the school rooftop. You may have been avoiding class, but you were very predictable in the places you liked to escape to. Behind the second-floor stairwell, the janitors closet on the first floor, the mostly empty classroom up on the third year’s floor. He knew all your little hiding spots around UA, but never had the heart to actually report you to Aizawa or any of his other teacher’s. When he reached the roof access and quietly opened the door, he saw you laying on the ground with your eyes closed. If you hadn’t looked so peaceful, he might have considered yelling at you.

However, the pure look of being serene made his heart flutter. It might have been because he had seen you sleep before but something about your resting presence just seemed so comforting and inviting. He quietly walked over to where you were and sat down next to you. Relaxing his mind, he even made the bold move to lay down and stare at the clouds. “You know, Present Mic is going to get used to all of your rule breaking shenanigans.” Iida stated in a calm voice. “I know, I feel bad that I use his class to ditch but sometimes I just need the fresh air. In between classes doesn’t give me enough time sometimes.” You answered almost immediately.

This shocked him because he was almost positive you were asleep. The silence continued as Iida watched the clouds and enjoyed the breeze that was blowing across their faces. “Why don’t you just…follow the rules like the rest of the class, Y/L/N?” Breaking the silence, Iida asked the question that had been plaguing him for months. Even his most troublesome classmates like Mina and Kirishima didn’t cause him as much strife as you did by skipping your classes. “Maybe it’s because it is the only way I know how to get your attention.” You dared to admit a loud. Almost instantly Iida got flustered and a blush spread from his neck to his face.

You almost immediately started to regret saying out loud your true intentions of slacking off in your academic career. You didn’t want to peep and see the expression on his face incase it was one that you didn’t want to see. “There are better ways to get my attention, but that doesn’t really seem to matter now because you already have it.” He expressed softly, refusing to also look at you afraid he also had said too much. He didn’t know that those words specifically would send your heart racing instantly. A smile spread across your face as you stood up from your spot on the roof and started towards the door. “Good to know, class rep.” You mentioned before opening the door, emphasizing on the words class rep. Iida could feel the residual rise of his blush and tried very hard to shove it away.

He heard the door open again and expected you to be there. Instead, he was met face to face with Aizawa-sensei. All the color drained from his face as Aizawa had processed what he was seeing. Iida, sitting casually on the rooftop and was red in the face. It wasn’t just embarrassment from your words, but from being caught in such a position. “Well, well, well. I would say I am surprised by this but after yesterday’s little escapade, I’m not.” Aizawa started to say. Before Iida could even begin to give an explanation, Aizawa held his hand up as if he couldn’t be bothered to hear what he had to say. “I expect this kind of behavior from Kaminari or Bakugou even. Yet, here I am, extremely disappointed to see that it’s you, Tenya Iida.” Aizawa scolded, eyes looking even more tired than usual.

Iida sat in silence, taking in the scolding he probably deserved for even thinking it was a good idea to lie to Present Mic. “Now, I have every right to pull you from the hero program.” Aizawa started with a rough tone to his voice. Iida’s heart stopped by the mere thought of that happening. “However, because this isn’t the most severe thing you have done in your time here at UA, I won’t do that. You will, however, be staying after school and cleaning up my classroom. Top. To. Bottom.” Aizawa explained, staring daggers into Iida’s eyes.

“Yes sir.” He responded to his teacher, feeling all but shame rising into his throat. “I won’t catch you slacking off again, Tenya. Now, go back to class before I up the punishment.” He growled, opening the door to the roof access, and motioned for Iida to go. He quickly walked past his teacher and found himself returning to Present Mic’s classroom. While it seemed that Present Mic had not noticed his long absence, Izuku had. “You were gone for some time, Iida. Is everything okay?” Izuku had whispered to him. No, everything was not okay. He was falling for a girl who was getting him in trouble the more he was around her.

               “Yes, I am fine, Midoriya. Go back to what you were doing.” Iida quickly replied, pulling out his school supplies and frantically found where the class had left off while he was off searching for you. Izuku didn’t seem convinced, however, he did not want to push his friend into telling him something he did not want to say. Izuku was not the only one to notice the mood change of one Tenya Iida. You had made it back to Present Mic’s class before he had returned. Honestly, you didn’t think it would have taken him as long to also return to class.

               After class was over and it was time for lunch, you were going to attempt to approach Iida to ask to sit next to each other at lunch. Yet, the glare he sent your way before exiting the classroom spoke volumes. You felt like you had been punched in the gut with the look he had given you. Shaking it off, you had decided to just give Iida his distance. You knew he could get into his head about his studies and maybe for once he was just struggling with the material. In the back of your head, you knew that wasn’t it. For once, you decided that you would show up on time to the rest of your classes. Concluding that maybe he was tired of playing cat and mouse with you. Tired of trying to get you to understand his plights.

               When school was let out, you had heard him talking with Momo Yaoyorozu in the hallway about staying after school to help Aizawa with a project. Momo had always been pretty popular in the class, despite you thinking about her being a rich brat. She had done nothing in particular to make you dislike her, but there was always something about people showing off their financial status that bothered you. “I admire how you always go above and beyond for Class 1-A, Iida. You truly are an outstanding student.” You heard Momo compliment him, tone almost too friendly. You didn’t have any reason to be jealous – Iida wasn’t even yours. Yet, hearing her compliment him so calmly and confidently struck a chord with you.

               Iida was out of your league, and always had been.

                You weren’t the best student regarding both your attendance and your grades. Momo was way more popular than you were and honestly, in your own opinion, way better looking. Who were you to think that Iida had actually liked you? “I appreciate that, Yaoyorozu. I try my best to stay on top of things as Class Rep. Especially when it comes to the other students. I try to pick up where they lack to help the image of 1-A come to fruition.” He declared proudly. The color drained from your face hearing the last part of that sentence.

               Was it all a ploy? To get you to play by the rules so he wouldn’t have to constantly remind you of their classes’ image. A strange anger burned inside you as you clenched your fist and you fled back to your dorm in Heights Alliance. The following days played out the same as they usually did for you. Iida was back to focusing on his schoolwork and his group of friends while you mainly stayed secluded to yourself. You would skip class every now and then, but not enough to really irritate the class rep. The last thing you wanted was for Iida to come stomping up to you, whining about attendance and the image he so desperately wanted to portray for his classmates.

               You had kept your distance from him. It didn’t help that you kept catching him hanging out with Yaoyorozu. They were a perfect match. Two of the best students in the class being together. It didn’t hurt you any less of shatter any bit of confidence you had left. The thing that really pushed you over the edge was overhearing Momo talk to Jirou about how she thought her, and Iida looked good together. “I never really stopped to consider him as a possible date, but he really has it all together. A good family, a great goal, and even better quirk to really get him up in ranks.” Momo gushed, sighing afterwards. You hid yourself back in your dorm room after that. You stuck to studying and ignored if anyone had come to your dorm room to interact with you.  

               However, Iida noticed you also distancing yourself from him. He noticed every time you were slightly late to class, every time you skipped or just out right refused to show up and noticed how you didn’t pay attention most of the time when a teacher was giving a lecture. Surely you had to be doing this on purpose to gain his attention. You had admitted it plain as day to him on the top of the school rooftop. The annoyance he was getting from you playing this out, knowing how much it frustrated him, was rising each passing day. Especially when he kept getting looks from their teachers about your lack of care for the class. While it wasn’t directly his fault, it still fell on him when the rest of the class was slacking.

               So, when you weren’t on time on Friday for your homeroom class once again, Iida had had enough. When you entered the classroom, once again all eyes fell on you. Iida could feel the burn of Aizawa’s gaze on him upon your late entry. “Miss Y/L/N. You are once again late to homeroom. You have consecutively been late to most of your classes this week. Your behavior is unacceptable! You are making the rest of the class look foolish with your lackadaisical attitude. We expect this kind of behavior from Denki! Or even Sero for that matter! Yet, here you are, showing up once again late to homeroom!” Iida exclaimed loudly, standing up from his chair at his desk.

               The entire class went silent. You could hear a pin drop from how quiet it had gotten. The eye contact the two of you shared was intense. No one dare spoke up, even during the awkward burning silence that took place after his reprimanding. You were trying to keep yourself composed but it felt like he was personally attacking you. Tears had threatened to fall from your eyes because you were tired yourself. You stayed up all night beating yourself up about why you thought you stood a chance. You obviously didn’t. Especially with the look he was giving you right now. The anger that was burning in his eyes and directed right at you. “What do you have to say for yourself.” He demanded, challenging you to challenge him back.

               And challenge him back you did. The tears threatened to fall down your burning cheeks. How dare he yell at you in front of all your classmates. In front of your teacher. When he was the one who led you on, thinking you even stood a chance. Your eyes glanced over to Momo, and you felt your anger flare up more with her looking so impressed with him. 

             “WELL, MAYBE IF YOU DIDN’T SNEAK YOUR WAY INTO MY BED WHEN I WAS SICK AND MAKE ME FALL FOR YOU, I WOULD PROBABLY ACTUALLY CARE MORE.” You shouted. You almost enjoyed the look of shock that came from Iida’s face at your statement. Everyone’s jaws dropped at your comment and looked back from Iida to you.  If the classroom could get anymore quiet, it would. Tears had started falling down your face as you rushed out of the classroom. Sero had fallen backwards out of his chair being in absolute shock of what you said.

               “Dude seriously? Now is the time you don’t keep your balance?” Kaminari questioned him. Iida took a moment to compose himself before turning swiftly to Sero. “You told me you had it safely balanced with your tape! You need to be more responsible Sero!” He scolded him while chopping his hand in the air. The class started muttering in wonder about what you had said. “Take your seat, Iida Tenya. Everyone else quiet down. Class is starting.” Aizawa sternly said. Iida slowly slid down his seat and tried to focus on what Aizawa was saying.

               But your voice kept ringing in his ears, the sentence that plagued for the rest of the day. What had he done?

Tag List: 

@ghostexhibit

[velvetcoves]

some V3 relationship HCs :) (boys)

(f/n)= first name <3

-mod velv

K1-B0 (KIIBO)

★ I LOVE HIM-

★ anyway

★ Kiibo has a basic understanding of human nature, but there are things that he just.. doesn’t get

★ like.. why do you have so many cups?? don’t you need only a couple?

★ and yes, he supposes that rock shines, but why do you need it?

★ you’ll have to explain to him some of your nature, and most humans as well. he’s very interested in learning as much as he can :)

★ after he gets some of it, (which took a while), he’ll start collecting little things that remind him of you. like a crow

★ your reactions mean everything to him

★ if you have any games that require timing, i have one word for you.

★ Kiibo.

★ he can literally pass any levels you’re stuck on

★ did i mention he heats up?

★ even though he’s.. made of metal, he’s surprisingly very comfortable! however, there are times where some parts of him dig into you uncomfortably, but there are solutions :)

★ like sweaters!! and blankets

★ speaking of, i feel like Kiibo would have a love-hate relationship with winter

★ on one hand, he gets to see you in the snow, help you make a snowman, and keep you warm during the cold nights

★ but.. his body gets stuck more often.

★ and the metal gets cold quickly, and he doesn’t want you cold :(

★ but you just remind him of the sweaters and you’ve got a happy robot :)

KOREKIYO SHINGUJI

★ whenever you two go out, he always has to be touching you in someway

★ it’s never something big, and most times you don’t even notice him until later

★ more often than not, his hand finds its way to your back

★ it’s now a habit of his, to kind of lead you with that

★ if his hand isn’t at your back, i feel like it would be somewhere on your arm. like a linked arm, or he’s holding your hand so he doesn’t lose you in a crowd.

★ ok but his h a i r?

★ can i be a simp for hair

★ he definitely would let you, and only you play with his hair. like braiding it, brushing, etc.

★ i feel like he would rarely call you by your actual name, because he uses so. many. pet names.

★ “angel, could you grab that for me?”

★ “dearest, come here for a second.”

★ stuff like that smh oh to be called dearest by Kiyo

★ he’d tease you sometimes as well

★ if you’re shorter than him, he’d definitely hold things above his head so you couldn’t grab them. and if you’re taller than him, then oh boy. he’d hide stuff from you. not important things, but stuff you’d need only in that specific moment.

★ he also really likes to play with your fingers lol it helps him concentrate

★ ok but just imagine.. Kiyo in the middle of a conversation, you’re not really paying attention as you’re screwing around on your phone. suddenly, Kiyo’s soft fingers interlace between yours, giving your hand a squeeze before he begins to play with your index finger as he continues to talk. tracing the shape of it into his mind. almost like he wanted to make a copy of you.

★ he could never try to replicate you, though. you’re so perfect to him.

RANTARO AMAMI

★ TEASE KING. STEP ASIDE KOKICHI

★ Rantaro is definitely that dude that if you’re wearing a hat, he’ll pull it down over your eyes or he’ll just straight up steal it.

★ play with his hair plEASE-

★ his hair is soft, threads through your fingers rather easily, and smells like lime

★ y’all are that couple that has one’s head in their lap as they read or somethin, playing with the other’s hair.

★ he is also that dude that comes up behind you, covering your eyes with his hands as he whispers, “guess who?~”

★ Rantaro actually has pretty small hands, and they’re actually cold most of the time.

★ beware of him and his goddamn hands smh

★ he will definitely stick his hands under your shirt for “warmth” as he so says. you know that he just wants to see your reactions

★ he’s actually god at eyeliner, so if you need to wear some, he’s your guy. hey, the dude has sisters.

★ speaking of, his sisters absolutely ADORE you. usually when you go over to his house they just.. immediately snatch you for 99% of the time and Rantaro is just “😀”

★ he leaves you little doodles everywhere. like he’ll bring you a book you asked for, and like on the 120th page there’s a crow with heels and it's the funniest thing you’ve seen all day

★ he starts laughing when you bring it up, and eventually you both are just laughing so hard at it you can't breathe

★ he has so much fun when he’s with you. he can never repay you

SHUICHI SAIHARA

★ steal his hat steal his hat steal his-

★ Shuichi is flustered rather easily when it comes to you, so use that information to your advantage hehe

★ expect lots of cuddles from him, especially those back hugs. like the ones where he’ll come up behind you and wrap his arms around you, leaning his head on top of yours if you're shorter, or against your back if you’re taller.

★ he’ll let out a small sigh of content as he nuzzles into your form, trying to keep his face hidden.

★ he finds your voice so soothing, especially when you read to him? like watch this:

★ you two are working on one of his cases together. your job is reading out his notes from the scene, your voice a low murmur as he works away. you haven’t noticed that he’s just.. stopped writing, staring at his pen as he begins to play with it. scratchy handwriting is what his eyes rake over, an adoring smile plastered to his face as he just listens. eventually you notice he’s stopped. “..Shuichi?” your soft voice asks, and he jolts a bit, grasped from his daydream. “a-ah.. sorry (f/n).. continue?”

★ more often than not it's your murmurs that causes the sleep deprivation to slap him in the face and just be knocked tf out.

★ helping him with cases is one of your favorite things?? like Shuichi you’re so smart give yourself some credit?????

★ every morning he greets you with a small smile. even though he’s still really tired, he makes an effort for you :)

★ i love funky detective man smh

GONTA GOKUHARA

★ b,, baby man,,

★ if you’re terrified of bugs, he’ll try to keep his little friends away from you, he doesn’t want to scare you at all :(

★ if you don’t mind bugs/you like them, he’ll be overjoyed!!

★ he probably has a bug named after you

★ more often than not, you’ll find them in your room or on your things. usually they’re really gorgeous, he says they remind you of him that day :)

★ he tries to switch up the bugs you find each day, so it’s always a little surprise when you enter your own room

★ ask him to carry you

★ he wants to carry you.

★ pl e a se

★ Gonta is also really warm, and his hands are HUGE

★ expect so many head pats from him. he loves how small you are compared to him

★ boops from Gonta? boops from Gonta.

★ this man straight up craves your cuddles.

★ because of his body temperature and scent of pine, it’s not hard at all to fall asleep in his embrace

★ i feel like he wakes up rather early, so he gets the pleasure of watching you sleep

★ not in a creepy way! he thinks you look so.. peaceful. angelic, is more of the word.

★ he absolutely LOVES seeing you in his clothes. just the way the cloth envelopes your tiny frame, you with your adorable smile and sweater paws?

★ god he loves you sm

RYOMA HOSHI

★ when you two first got into a relationship, he rarely touched you.

★ he literally had no idea what to do

★ he lived all of his life on eggshells, scared of every coming day

★ and then you, his ray of sunshine, just came to him?

★ he’s just so lost

★ however, you knew what to do.

★ you basically taught him that no, you’re not going to disappear from his life at any given moment. you promise.

★ it took some convincing, but you got there.

★ anyway, he doesn’t show too much PDA, but he’s taken up the habit of grasping your sleeve when you two walk together

★ given the fact that you’re likely taller than him, this boy l o v e s your hugs.

★ the way you just envelope him in your loving embrace.. he feels like he doesn’t deserve it.

★ he might tell you so, but you quickly shut him up with a kiss or something :)

★ spooning spooning spooning-

★ he’s usually little spoon, but he’ll be big spoon if you want :)

★ Ryoma really likes being held by you. he feels like time stops, like all that matters is you in that moment.

★ he just feels so safe when he’s around you. he’s gotta get used to it

★ one time when you both went on a date, you accidentally found the main base of the stray cats in your town

★ they LOVED him and now you go there frequently to visit the cats

★ ya’ll definitely have a cat from there too smh you’re so cute

KOKICHI OUMA

★ at the earliest stages of your relationship, i have two words for you.

★ good luck.

★ you are not safe from Kokichi.

★ you are targeted by him.

★ anyway, i definitely feel like he would be so clingy with you.

★ he doesn’t care that you’re in public, he will latch onto you and be a nuisance.

★ holding onto your sleeve, holding your hand, latching onto your leg so you have to drag him around, full on trying to tackle you, etc.

★ p i g g y b a c k r i d e s

★ if you don’t want him to completely annoy you, just hoist him up onto your back for a ride

★ he LOVES it

★ i also feel like he wouldn’t really know what he’s doing at first.. you make him feel so many things, emotions that he thought were buried a long time ago. it’s a bit too much for him

★ patience is key with Kokichi. please just wait for him. he’ll catch up when he’s ready.

★ but when he does? and when you’ve convinced him you’re not leaving anytime soon?

★ you have the most caring and lovable man right at your side.

★ he’s.. so soft with you.

★ Kokichi absolutely adores being held by you. probably the most out of the V3 crew. he feels so secure, so sure of your relationship in those moments. he sleeps best when you’re around, which he desperately needs due the insomnia that plagues him most nights.

★ quiet cuddles are such a treasure to you. he’s usually silent during your cuddle sessions, his head either in the crook of your neck or buried in your chest, inhaling your scent so he can imprint it to his mind. it makes you more in love with him.

★ also DICE adores you-

KAITO MOMOTA

★ he is,, the biggest simp for you,,,

★ literally every single day, Kaito looks at you with the biggest grin on his face because every time he looks at you, he notices a new thing that makes him love you even more.

★ stargazing da te s✨

★ ^ these dates often end up with him going on a rant about the constellations and their movements, star types, etc. and you love him for it

★ his coat is so warm?? you wonder how he wears it 24/7

★ he absolutely LOVES it when you tackle hug him. he doesn’t even care if he was in the middle of a conversation, just feeling the sudden embrace of his s/o makes him melt.

★ those tackle hugs usually end up in him turning around and scooping you up, spinning you around before planting you back down and giving you a sweet kiss

★ PDA? he loves it

★ he NEVER would do anything that makes you uncomfortable though.

★ your PDA mostly consists of hand holding, hugs, all that soft stuff :)

★ he would definitely have to do a double take if you ever wore his jacket.

★ “hey (f/n)? where-“ and he’d just s t a r e at you, his face going ablaze in red

★ he’s like that Tamaki gif

★ yeah that one ^

★ more often than not, you get piggyback rides from him

★ the gentle rock of his body as he walks, his overall warmth, his scent of lavender.. it’s perfect to lull you asleep.

★ he wouldn’t have it any other way :)

[pluviophile-bookworm]

Very spontaneous and chaotic thoughts about today’s HSMTMTS (2x7) - but mostly about one specific scene

Oh my gods, oh my gods, you guys! That was literally the best possible excuse for The Mob Song being in that arrangement, honestly, I just loved that! I had been worried about what they did to it ever since it appeared in the trailer, but now I am more than relieved -- I am in love! [Personal story time: after avoiding this song like the literal plague for ages because it had traumatised me as a child, I revisited it at age 17 and since then it's been my favourite song from BATB. End of personal story]

I don't know why, but I always seem to love, well, duels of any kind in the media I consume — fencing, pistols, fisticuffs, rap battles, dance-offs, you name it. Unless the duel ends in Philip Hamilton's extremely untimely death, you know. [At this time this post is just 'how many not-so-subtle musical theatre references can I get into this', except there's just one after this here side note]

So here, in this massive dance-off we had a. battle of the Beasts, b. battle of the Lumieres and c. most iconically, battle of the Belles [there was no contest there, my girl Ashlyn is the best — in a Technician vs. Performer rivalry, I tend to side with the performer, and boy, is she one].

Except Ashlyn just had to trip at the end and Antoine just had to be the one to catch her — that being right after he, first, blatantly flirted with her, and then insulted my boy Big Red and told Ashlyn she should break up with him. And here I was starting to like this guy.  Funnily enough, I kind of felt a weird satisfaction seeing jealous Big Red, but at the same time, he's feeling bad about the whole thing and I do not appreciate it. And although I loved Carlos in the battle of the Lumieres [he shone like the dazzling star he is!], I really wished for a moment that Antoine and Big Red would face off instead and that Big Red would get, like, really in Antoine's face and whatnot, but hey, we can't have it all.

Anyway, the only pairings I care about at this point are Seblos and Redlyn. And Gina and EJ, but emphatically only as friends. Seriously, all the Rini drama can go to Hartford, Hereford and Hampshire, for all I care. That 'Nina' thing at the end was kind of a shock, though. Still, at the end of the day, I don't care. As long as my babies are happy. Also I really wasn't ever super invested in the whole thing Kourtney and Howie have going on, so I just don't seem to have a massive reaction to that side of things.

Sincerely, 

a Big Red stan who has been watching the Mob Song scene on replay for the last half hour at least.

P.S I lowkey love how ABF ‘forgot’ that his character is supposed to be French while singing until literally the last two words. Although people of any nationality putting on an American accent when singing is pretty much Truth in Television, I know.

P.P.S I kind of feel like being flirted with while having an amazing and adoring boyfriend could be good for Ashlyn’s confidence. Not that a girl’s worth should be defined by guys’ opinions of her, but I think it might be a nice boost and she needs a boost because she’s truly wonderful and needs to know it.

[where-theres-smoak-2]

My Season 2 Wishlist

Now that I’ve read Siege and Storm I have some scenes that I am looking forward to seeing in the show. Seeing as season 1 was mainly taken from the first book I am going to say that season 2 will likely mostly be taken from Siege and Storm. So these are the scenes and things that I am most looking forward to seeing in the show/ really hope are going to be in the show, along with some that I am not looking forward to seeing quite as much, they aren’t in any particular order of preference. Spoiler alert for book 2, obvs. Also as a darklina shipper alot of these are centred around that ship so if that's not your thing maybe skip this post, alot of it is me gushing about how much darklina we might be able to get. 

1) The Nichevo'ya 

So we got a little glimpse of them at the end of the first scene but I am really looking forward to seeing more of them and also of seeing them in large numbers, as an actual army. 

2) Nikolai, The Twins and The Hummingbird 

I am super excited to see all these new characters, Nikolai and Tolya and Tamar and how they interact with the rest of our characters. But I am also really excited to see the Hummingbird because lets be real who doesn’t love a flying ship in a fantasy show.

3) The Sea Whip

This is one where I am both really looking forward to seeing it but also dreading it. I am looking forward to seeing it because I think its going to look so beautiful and majestic, they did such a good job on the stag and I think they’ll do a good job with the Sea Whip too. But then I don’t want to see it because its going to look beautiful and then its going to die and I honestly don’t know if I can handle that. But I am also curious to see how they are going to handle the amplifier. In the book its a fetter (bracelet) but then in the book the collar is more like a necklace, in the show it was a monstrosity that was embedded in her skin. So are they going to have the scales embedded in her skin? Maybe where you can just see the surface of them on her skin or will they do what they did with the collar where you can see it in her skin to start with but then she absorbs it into her body so you can’t see it anymore and they don’t have to bother with a prosthetic for long? Maybe they’ll just create new lore and say because this time she killed it herself and its being used in a different way, as oppose to someone else killing it and controlling the wearer, then they can just have it as a bracelet and there’s no need to actually fuse it into her skin? 

4) David’s Mirrors. 

I really thought the idea David had to make those big mirrors so that Alina could use the cut to kill even more nichevo’ya at it time was interesting. The mirrors would kind of amplify her power and in the books it is quite the light show. I have very good reasons for wanting to see this, first is it means more screen time for David. Secondly, whilst working on the mirrors there’s a really cute scene where David asks about Genya. I really hope they put this in because not only does it build the relationship between Alina and David it also shows that David does return Genya’s feelings. Thirdly, and in the words of Aleksander himself, it once again proves the many uses of a durast. More in the books than the show there is this attitude towards the fabrikators that they are the most useless out of all the grisha. As a champion of the underdog, I naturally love to see them proving them all wrong. Also there’s you know the fact that they’ll probably be some cool special effects and who doesn’t love some sparkly sunshine sfx. 

5) Ben Barnes’ Darkling. 

So the darkling has already done some pretty dark things in the show but in the second book he goes even darker, which seeing as he is the anti-hero I am expecting them to have him do more dark things in season 2. However I really want them to let Ben Barnes to continue to bring that element of humanity to the character and that complexity that he did in the first season. I can take him doing horrific things (I can’t but lets pretend I can, I can close my eyes for those bits right?). But I also want to see scenes where he is desperately trying to explain himself to Alina with tears in his eyes just like episode 7. I also want them to keep driving home the fact that he is doing this for his people because I feel like his motivations in the books sometimes got lost and at times he seemed like he was doing these terrible things without any motivation and just because he’s the villain. By all means take me to the dark side, just lead me there with understandable motives and a teary eyed ben barnes. 

I also really want to see some more of his backstory, maybe even the events of Demon in the Wood. The darklina in me would also like Alina to discover some of his backstory and also the true story of how the fold was created but I don’t know if that’ll happen. 

6) Alina’s Darkside.

Speaking of going to the darkside, in the book we do see Alina getting tempted by her darker side and she also begins to hunger for more power, especially after she has the second amplifier. She does a few darker things in the book like nearly killing Sergei, threatening Baghra and she even considers forcing the sea whip fetter onto Tolya so that she can control his power. I do hope they keep some of these darker actions, also it might seem dark, defo morally grey, but I would like her to be put into a difficult position where she has to like sacrifice people in order to either win a battle or save a vulnerable group of people. Kind of like when (warning 100 and GOT spoilers) Clarke from the 100 kills the Mountain Men to save her people or like when Robb Stark sacrifices 2000 of his men to win a battle against the Lannisters in Game of thrones. I just want her to understand the sacrifices of war and how as a general you have to make hard decisions. I feel like she doesn’t really have to face this reality in the book. I mean she is plagued by how she left the skiff behind in the fold at the end of book one, but seeing as I don’t understand why she did that in the first place and obviously they took that out of the show, I think they need some other similar situation where its a case of like, you can save these innocent civilians but you’ll have to sacrifice your own soldiers to do it. Or if you wanted to go even darker than that, a situation where she has to make the decision to save her own soldiers (because she can’t afford to lose too many of them) but she knows if she pulls them back then civilians will die. As difficult as it would be to watch I do think it would push her character development forward and really make her understand that war is no game. I am being really mean here but I also want to see her lose some battles maybe against Fjerda or Shu Han. I would also like her to show more interest in these border wars where Grisha are being killed as oppose to just the Fold and the Darkling but I am not holding my breath on that one. Basically I want to see her struggle and to then overcome it and grow into a confident and experienced general. I do feel like if she is struggling to keep the balance between fighting the Fjerdans, the Shu Han and the Darkling whilst also looking for the last amplifier and playing the political game at court with Nikolai, then it would not only contribute to her character development and teach her valuable skills but also give her some inkling of how much pressure Aleksander was under as well and maybe help her understand a little why he did what he did. 

Also and I really care about this one, please continue to let her have her own agency. Let her make her own decisions and come up with her own ideas and plans as oppose to having other characters telling her what to do. That was one change they made from the books in season 1 that I was really happy with, that she does have alot more agency. 

7) Darklina Bond.  

One of the more interesting things to me in Siege and Storm was this psychic (well kind of) bond between Alina and Aleksander. I also thought that element of Alina not really knowing what it was and thinking maybe she was losing her mind was interesting, but I’ll also be interested to see the bond from the Darkling’s pov. Like did he also at first think he was losing his mind or did he recognise what it was right away? What was his reaction the first time he felt her call to him? I do think there is alot of potential with the bond to have some soft darklina moments and I hope they develop it a bit more in the show. Like just having little moments, maybe a shot of the two of them just laying on his bed together, or him sitting quietly just watching her as she reads. I think the bond should work well in the show because whilst in the books we get told she sees him everywhere its hard to kind of picture it. Whereas I think in the show they can put him in the background of scenes. So like if she’s in a meeting it can just show him standing somewhere in the room and maybe he keeps making comments and she is just trying to ignore him but sometimes her eyes slip over to him. I feel like there is potential for some comedic moments too if they decide to go that route by having Alina answer him but obviously with no one else in the room being able to see him they think she is talking to them. Or by having someone catching her essentially talking to herself and her having to find a way to explain it away. I just really want them to do this bond justice. I also would love it if they used the bond for darklina to actually have meaningful conversations with each other. Maybe he even gives her some advice general to general? I would also like to see him give her some comfort, like she has a really bad day and so she unknowingly calls him to her and seeing that she is upset he gives her comfort. I also want them to touch on how she misses him when he doesn’t show up. Like they could have her search for him in the places he usually shows up like his room or the library and maybe she calls out his name hoping he’ll answer. I think this would show that she does want him to show up like it states in the book that they only go to each other when they both want to see the other. And more importantly than anything they have to keep the line when she asks why he doesn’t leave her alone and he replies ‘then I’d be alone too.’  

8) The Attack on The Palaces

I feel like this is going to look epic on screen. Again it comes down to just really wanting to see fancy special effects. Also as I said at the beginning I really do want to see an army of nichevo’ya and I feel like we aren’t going to see them in huge numbers until the finale or maybe as a last shot of episode 7. Like I could see a scenario where Nikolai’s birthday celebration happens in episode 7 and then the last scene is Vasily’s announcement and Nikolai figuring out that the Darkling is coming, then the bells sound and it pans up out of the grande palace and over the horizon you just see thousands of nichevo’ya closing in on the Palaces. Then they’ll probably have the finale be focused solely on this battle that happens. I really do hope they make it as epic as possible with lots of badass moments for all of our favourite characters. What I am not looking forward to is seeing any of the characters I love die, and well I love pretty much every character in the show so I feel like its going to be an emotional episode for me. 

9) The Chapel Scene 

Ok this is a must have. I need to see this please, again because epicness you know. I also think this is a pivotal moment for Alina’s character where she realises that the bond between her and the Darkling means she can control his powers like he controlled hers. She uses this to try and overload both herself and the darkling. This scene has alot of complexity to it because its in this moment that she understands that her and the darkling are alike, she recognises that she has some darkness inside her, she lets go of all the fear and guilt she has felt about that darkness and then she uses it. She kind of decides to tie their fates together. But like I said I think it’ll be a very complex scene because on the one hand I do think Alina (particularly in the show) does have feelings for him and in this moment she understands that they’ve got this fated connection between them, I suppose you could call, it in the book there’s this quote which I think explains it well, this is when she chooses to stay with the Darkling whilst her friends escape and Mal says you can’t choose him:

 ‘”There isn’t any choice to make. This is what was meant to be.” It was true. I felt it in the collar, in the weight of the fetter. For the first time in weeks, I felt strong.

Another quote that shows this sense of fate she is feeling is: 

“We are alike,” he said, “as no one else is, as no one else will ever be.” The truth of it rang through me. Like calls to like.

So in this moment she is feeling very connected to the Darkling and she is really embracing who she has become. Then on the other hand there's the reality that in this moment she is trying to kill them both believing it will save the world which has this kind of tragic sadness to it. Like I said she does this by taking control of his powers and trying to overuse the merzost. Also I don’t know about anyone else but I did think there was something kind of gratifying about seeing her take control of his power like he did to her, giving him a taste of his own medicine so to speak. I think it keeps that balance between them of yes he might have power over her but she has power over him too. She really is the only one who can match him. 

I also really want to see how they are going to show the merzost and what they’ll do with her hair turning white due to it. I do think this will be a very intense scene similar to when Alina takes back her power in episode 8 of season 1. I also suspect they’ll be really mean and maybe end the whole season with the chapel coming down and us wondering if anybody inside survived.    

10) The Crows 

I am looking forward to seeing what they do with the characters from six of crows. I haven’t read the duology yet as I am still working on the last grisha trilogy book so I have no idea what they are going to do with that storyline. I have seen the name Wylan floating about but I have no idea who that is just that he seems like a character alot of people want to see. So naturally that has made me really want to see him and find out what he’s all about. Also I am including Nina and Matthias in this section along with the Crows because I suspect that Nina is going to be joining the Crows and that they will be trying to get Matthias out of prison as well as dealing with Pekka Rollins and Dreesen. I am also assuming that Nina, Matthias and Wylan are the three others out of the six of crows right? I mean those three characters joining the team will make it six, so logic.

The other character I really want to see is Milo our  friendly neighbourhood goat and honorary Crow mascot. Like I don’t care how he gets written in I just want this goat to show up in random places and contribute to the plot in small ways like he did with the bullet helping Mal escape. Basically I want him to be like the jail dog in Pirates of the Caribbean that just randomly shows up without any explanation. 

11) More Mal Development 

So the show did a good job in season one of making Mal a bit more relatable and more of a sympathetic character than he is in the books. I definitely got nice guy/ loyal friend vibes from him. You know he’s that guy most people can get along with. However I do think that out of all of the characters Mal’s was the least developed. I feel like I don’t really know much about him outside of his relationship with Alina, you know. I know that he is loyal and dedicated to her, I know that he cares deeply for her. But the only thing I really know about Mal himself outside of how he feels about Alina is that he is a skilled tracker which is a little disappointing as I would like to know more about him. They did touch on some other elements that could be interesting to explore more, like how as a child he was the boy who always runs from a fight, and it seemed like Alina was very much his protector when they were children. Then when he becomes an adult he is seen as a fighter and as someone who isn’t afraid of anything. I would like to know what his journey was to get him from one to the other. They never really develop this side of his character past episode 1 because after Alina is discovered to be the sun summoner his whole character arc becomes about her. In Siege and Storm Mal does struggle a bit with feeling useless and during the flashbacks to child Mal in the show there did seem to be this feel that Mal was considered useless by the others at the orphanage, like when Ana Kuya (the housekeeper) would say you can’t hide forever, or when the boy talked about Mal’s scrap with dinner would mean he couldn’t be tested. I just got this sense that others around him at the orphanage made him feel useless and like he was a coward who hid and ran away from things. I think it could be interesting if they tie this into his story arc in season 2. 

I would also like to see some conflict between Mal and Alina. I don’t really feel like we got any in season 1, I mean they did both believe the other was ignoring their letters but it is resolved very quickly once they reunited. But I also want it to be interesting conflict as oppose to conflict just for the sake of conflict. Like I could see what the Darkling said to Mal about Alina being immortal coming into play because in the book he actually said it to Alina the part about being eternal and how there is no one else like them and never will be. So to me its interesting that they had the Darkling say it to Mal. I do think this is going to mess with Mal’s head a bit. Also it is unclear if in the show Alina knows that she is immortal, I don’t think she does. So it could be interesting if Mal is acting distance and struggling with this knowledge he knows and Alina is confused because she doesn’t know and so doesn’t understand why he’s acting this way, then  eventually he blurts it out in an argument and now Alina has to confront this fact that she’ll have to watch Mal grow old and die whilst she won’t. 

 Also I think they could combine this with Mal seeing a difference in Alina and seeing that she isn’t the same person she was before becoming the sun summoner. Also Mal himself isn’t the same after suffering the trauma of losing his friends in Fjerda. I think combined together with his feelings of uselessness it could create an interesting tension between them as they are basically trying to get to know each other again. 

12) That Innuendo.

All my fellow darklinas probably know what line I am talking about here. But obviously its the ‘I’ll be certain you hear it when I make her scream’ one. I just really really want them to keep this scene in because I just know Jessie, Ben and Archie will kill it. The part that I am not looking forward to seeing is the part where he threatens to cut her face. Though I don’t know if he really would torture her as one, the show darkling is very different from the book darkling in that he has alot more humanity and two, it has been confirmed by the director of ep 5 and 6 as well as the actors that Aleksander really does care about Alina, the collar was one thing but full on torture I don’t know if it would make sense for him to cross that line. In the book the Darkling does say that its a threat and it accomplished what it needed. But then when Alina asks if that means he wouldn’t have cut her his answer doesn’t make it clear as to whether he would or not. So it is possible the show will make it clear that its an empty threat to the audience, maybe, if they are going to try and keep the darkling as being more anti-hero, and human than all out villain. 

But going back to the scene I do want to see. I can just picture it now, Alina stumbling and Aleksander reaching out to quickly catch her and pulling her against him. Then their eyes meet and they forget that everyone else is there and just stare deeply into each others eyes, probably both thinking back to their kiss in the war room, it would be a nice little touch if they have flashes of memories, like their kisses and their moment in episode 4 where she wraps them both in her light, all the longing stares they had, this would be the perfect moment to reinsert that deleted horse riding scene into the show. Then they show a close up of his hand as he slides it across her back to pull her closer. Then there’s a shot of Mal who looks suitably upset and who tries to break free of his guards and tells him to leave her alone, which breaks the spell between Alina and Aleksander and Alina realising how close she is to Aleksander pulls away guiltily. Which is when Aleksander asks ‘perhaps that’s not what you fear’ to Mal. There is one little thing I would change from the book though and that it when he delivers the line ‘when I make her scream’ instead of Alina being halfway down the hatch to belowdecks, have her still up on top deck with them and have it so Aleksander is talking to Mal but looking at her when he says it. 

I mean the chemistry between Jessie and Ben would be amazing and I think Archie would play the scene perfectly too, showing Mal’s conflicting emotions of anger and protectiveness, but also his insecurity and fear. I just really really need this scene to be in season 2, please let me have it.           

Anyway I don’t know how much of this will make it into season 2 as with my experience tv show adaptions tend to abandon most of the books plot after season 1 but these are a few things I wouldn’t mind seeing in the show. 

[anxiousstark]

S2 05 | Venomous

BIG MASTERLIST | TW REWRITE

Stiles Stilinski x Reader! Half-sibling!Mccall

Word count: 2305

Warnings: Mentions of injuries, murder, swearing (always).

↪ PLEASE RESPECT MY WORK. DON’T COPY, TRANSLATE OR CLAIM THEM AS YOURS. NOT ON THIS WEBSITE OR ANOTHER. ALL RIGHTS ARE RESERVED.

"All right, I only found one thing online called a kanima. It's a werejaguar from South America that goes after murderers." Stiles grabbed his backpack with one hand while the three of us left class.

"That thing was not a jaguar."

"Yeah, and I'm not exactly a murderer." I chuckled as Stiles threw his hands in the air.

"Yeah, but you did see it kill somebody, which is probably why it tried to kill you. And it's still trying to kill you, and it probably won't stop until you're dead." Scott gazed at me. "Especially, not until she is dead." Thank you for the reminder, dear Scotty.

"You know, sometimes I really begin to question this 'friendship."

"Hey guys," I stopped walking, both of them doing the same thing, peering at me. "I will catch you in the next class. I need to talk to someone." I glanced at Jackson who was resting his side against the lockers, talking to Danny.

"Are you sure?" The Hazel-eyed boy questioned after he followed my gaze. "Do you want me to go with you? Because last time he-"

"It's okay," My hand rested on his right arm, rubbing my finger through his shirt. "Jackson is acting suspicious, more than normal. He has been talking to this guy from class." Both boys waited for me to continue talking. "He asked that boy for his camera, to record himself at night."

"How did you get that information?"

"At the lacrosse game the other night, he started talking and didn't shut up." I chuckled while rolling my eyes to add a little more of dramatism. "He told me that Jackson gave him back the camera, but it was broken. He didn't give any explanation of what had happened. Just told him to send him the bill, rich boy things I suppose."

"Okay," Scott nodded. "We will head to class, then." His hand grabbed my wrist delicately. "If you need help, let me know." I nodded at him, smiling. Then, I grinned at Stiles, knowing that he didn't feel comfortable with the situation. I didn't either, Jackson was hiding something. Something bigger than me.

I walked to Jackson and Danny, putting a sweet smile on my face. "Hi boys!" Danny winked at me. "Uhm, Jackson I need to talk to you about," I bit my lower lip. "About the swimming class!"

Danny nodded at us, saying he was going back to class. Then, I was left alone with the smirking boy.

"You aren't good at lying." He smirked while crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"Neither are you, Jackson." The smile disappeared from my face. "What is going on with you? You can't tell me you don't have a little idea of what you are." I mumbled, getting closer to him.

"Do you have any idea of what you are?" He got me there. "There's your answer. I don't either. But I know one thing for sure, Y/N McCall." I hated that last name, it came from someone who probably wouldn't even recognize me if he saw me. "Whatever I am, you are too." I shivered.

"I don't think so." I swallowed. "We might have been scratched by the same thing. But you," I pointed my finger to his chest. "You got scratched by a wolf, and you aren't one." Of course, I did have my suspicions. They only thing we knew for sure was that we weren't werewolves.

"I told you," He glared at me. "Shit going on in your life can affect the bite or scratch. Anxiety and depression can affect the outcome of being scratched by a wolf. You aren't one neither. It means you were also affected by those side effects."

"Flash me," I said. Jackson smirked, getting closer to me. "Your eyes, stupid asshole." I slapped the side of his head.

"I don't know how to do that, but they are yellow." He grabbed his backpack.

"Slit and yellow?" I asked curiously.

"Yes," He started walking away. "Now, if you excuse me I'm going to be a responsible student and go to my class."

I did the same as Jackson, walking to my next class. When I entered, both of my boys were sitting next to Lydia. I was surprised by that as normally Scott would sit with Allison or Stiles, and Stiles would sit with Scott or me. The male McCall made a gesture with his head, Erica and Isaac were sitting behind them. Nice. Derek thought that Lydia was the kanima, but she wasn't. I needed more proof, but I was convinced that the strawberry blonde girl wasn't that beast.

Mr. Harris looked at me. "Grab a seat, McCall." I apologized, doing what he had ordered. "Einstein once said, 'Two things are infinite: The universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.' I myself have encountered infinite stupidity." He put his hand on Stiles's shoulder. The poor boy looked up, pouting. "So to combat the plague of ignorance in my class, you're going to combine efforts through a round of group experiments. Let's see if two heads are indeed better than one. Or in Mr. Stilinski's case, less than one. Erica, you take the first station. You'll start with - I didn't ask for volunteers." Most of the boys in the class had their hands up, wishing to be put next to Erica. Horny teenagers. "Put your hormonal little hands down. Start with Mr. McCall. All right, next two."

Allison ended up sitting next to Lydia, Scott next to Erica, Stiles got a random person from class while I got to see next to Isaac Lahey. "If you touch Lydia, I will kill you." I hissed.

"Let me tell you," Isaac looked me up and down while I tried to follow the instructions. He completely ignored my previous words. "You look so beautiful. I can't believe you and Scott share the same daddy." He bit his lower lip. "I could be yours tho." His hand stretched out to touch my hair.

"CHANGE!" We all turned around to stare at Stiles, who had screamed that. He was looking directly at me. "I-I mean, Mr. Harris is time to c-change, right?"

"That's my job, Stilisnki." He glared at him. "Switch."

Now I was sitting next to Allison. "You okay?" I ask while helping her mix whatever we were mixing.

"Are you asking because that bitch put her hand on Scott's thigh." She smiled while gritting her teeth.

"Scott doesn't feel anything for her," I affirmed. "He is a puppy in love with you, Al." She smiled while I used her new nickname. We both continued following Mr. Harris's instructions. Then, I heard Stiles's voice who was sitting in front of me.

"If you harm one perfect (h/c) hair on her head, I'm gonna turn your little werewolf ass into a fur coat and give it to her as a birthday present." His hands moved rapidly, trying to match the instructions given by Mr. Harris. "Actually no, I wouldn't because she doesn't wear clothes that make use of animals to sell more, but that doesn't matter, I will still kill you."

"Mmmh seems like she could kill me with her hands." He was trying to get Stiles even madder. "She told me she would kill me if I touched Lydia." He smirked. "You have a crush on Lydia, right?"

Stiles shook his head, looking up, meeting Isaac's gaze. "Don't touch any of those girls."

"Listen, Stiles," He touched his nose, sniffing. "I could help you get Lydia, and then Y/N will be fully available for me. I told her she was beautiful, and she ignored me." Stiles smiled proudly. "I told her I couldn't believe that Scott and she shared the same fucking dad." He got closer to his ear. "I told her I could be her daddy."

The Hazel eyed boy bit his lower lip, trying to control his rage. "Mm, unrequited love's a bitch. Maybe you should write about it in English class, you know? Channel all that negative energy."

"Nah, I was thinking I'd channel it into killing her. I'm not very good at writing."

Mr. Harris touched the bell. "And switch!" I moved, sitting next to Erica now. Fuck my life. Stiles didn't move from his seat, which made Mr. Harris hit him with a ruler.

"Aw, that must hurt," Erica smirked while resting her head on her hand. "You seem mad, babygirl." She peered at me, still smiling. "I didn't touch your boy this time. I touched Allison's."

I smiled at her. "True, you didn't touch my boy, so I'm going to let this pass. Next time you touch anyone close to me, you are a dead werewolf, Erica. And tell Derek that if he dares touch, Lydia, I will kill him myself. I won't hesitate." I continued grinning. "I won't hesitate to discover what the fuck I am while I kill the three of you slowly, Erica."

"Seems like you are quite similar to your mom." She grinned. "Must feel like shit when your mom was a murderer."

"You and my mother have something in common then," I replied while swallowing, a knot had formed in my throat. "You both murder innocent people."

"Time. If you've catalyzed the reaction correctly, you should now be looking at a crystal. Now for the part of that last experiment, I'm sure you'll all enjoy - You can eat it." My eyes went to Scott to see that he was deeply studying Lydia and Isaac. Lahey has offered the crystal to Lydia, a thick liquid falling from it.

I rubbed my eyes, feeling frustrated. I couldn't help them. I couldn't entirely help them without knowing what creature was I. I yelled inside my head due to the frustration I felt. Next thing I know, the window next to Lydia shattered, the crystal fell to the floor due to the shock. The pieces of the window didn't hurt Lydia at all, but they hurt Isaac.

Scott looked back at me, mouth wide open. I did that?

After class, we parted ways. Scott went to 'talk' to Boyd and Derek to the lacrosse field, Allison went to talk to Lydia's psychiatric after she found out that she could be able to read whatever language the bestiary was in. Meanwhile, Stiles and I accompanied Lydia to the library, scared to leave her alone.

After that, we all reunited except Scott.

"If we're doing a study group, why didn't we just stay in the library?"

"Because we're meeting up with somebody else." His hand sometimes touched Lydia's arm, which made my heart ache for some unknown reason. He was just protecting her.

"Hmm, well, why don't they just meet us in the library?"

"Oh, that would've been a great idea. Too late."

"Okay, hold on-"

"Lydia, shut up and walk." I didn't like the idea of Jackson coming. Nobody was listening to me, Lydia wasn't the kanima. They wanted to protect her in case Derek would get a hold of her, but we needed to do other things, like discover who the fuck was the kanima. Even though, I had some ideas.

We got into Stiles's jeep, and when we arrived at his house, he closed the door, locking it and lying to Lydia, letting her know that there were some robberies on the neighborhood and a fricking murder. Great idea, Stiles.

When Jackson told Lydia that he wanted to talk to her, just the two of them, I didn't like that. But it was the perfect moment to tell Allison and Stiles about Jackson. "Guys listen," I started. "I think I know who the ka-"

I was interrupted when Allison noticed that Derek and the other were outside the house, ready to attack. She called Scott with Stiles's phone. "It's me." She was neurotic, like all of us. But they had to listen to me. "You need to get here now. Right now." When she hanged up, I tried to talk again.

"What are you doing?" I was interrupted by Stiles, who looked at Allison.

"I think...I think I have to call my dad."

"No, but if he finds you here - you and Scott -"

"I know. But what are we supposed to do? They're not here to scare us, okay? They're here to kill Lydia."

"Guys, there's no need in calling your dad, Allison." I raised my voice. "I know who-" I was interrupted, again. Allison was thrown to one side of the room, while Stiles to the other.

I hissed at the person, he turned around, flashing his eyes. Isaac Lahey. "Allison!" I yelled while keeping my eyes on Lahey. "Take care of Stiles!"

"Where are you going?!"

"I'm going to get the Kanima."

I went into some rooms, trying to find anything that would help me find the kanima. One of the windows inside a room had some sticky fluid, which meant the kanima was there. I went out of the window, thankful that Coach had made us climb rock walls.

"Would someone please tell me what the hell is going on?" I heard Lydia's voice, which meant that they were outside the house.

The kanima looked at me, trying to get away. "Jackson!" It turned around to look at me, he hissed. I groaned. Then, he jumped, pushing me down. I closed my eyes tightly, knowing that my body would hit the ground. Thankfully, I was caught my Stiles, more or less. I ended up on top of him, both of us on the ground. I panted looking around.

"Are you okay?" Scott ignored Derek while coming closer.

"I've been trying to say it all day." I gasped. Stiles sat down, I was still sitting on his lap. "It's Jackson. The Kanima it's Jackson."

What does that make me?

.

.

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People in bold means it doesn’t let me tag them.

[passable-talent]

Going with Ani to free his mom because you know it’s such a big moment for him (and obviously being there for the aftermath)

oof. here I go to make myself angsty for the evening

same day request answering. its like its april.

Padme Amidala is a really good person. It pretty much all comes back to that. 

She’s kind. She’s empathetic. She recognizes when someone is in pain, and when someone needs help. She understands when an unwise course of action is one that needs to be taken. 

So, of course, she understood when the Jedi apprentice meant to protect her instead wanted to run away to his birth planet and help his mother. Of course she did. 

Though, level headed as she was, she thought that it might be wise to gather up another Jedi. To watch over her while Anakin was distracted, or possibly to help Anakin face whatever plagued his mother. 

She suggested Anakin call upon Obi-Wan, which he refused. Obi-Wan’s mission was just as important, and if he knew what Anakin planned, Anakin would never be allowed to go.

So, instead, he called for you. 

You were also a Jedi apprentice, at that time training between missions at the temple on Coruscant. Your master, Shaak Ti, trusted you immensely, and granted you permission to leave on your own. You commanded a Starfighter and were on your way- opening a com to Anakin en route. You had never been to Tatooine before, but had heard about it whenever Anakin felt like sharing his childhood. As his closest friend other than his master, you knew how much his mother weighed on his soul, and how much he had wished that Qui-Gon could have saved her, too. You had known that one day, he would try to return. He had promised his Shmi as much. 

Anakin’s reunion with Watto was tense for just about everyone there. You didn’t know the terrain, you barely knew Padme, you certainly didn’t know Watto, but you felt the impatience rolling off of Anakin. It put you on edge, and so as he followed Watto into the shop, you kept pace behind Padme, ensuring her safety. It was the one thing you felt you were capable of doing, the one thing you could control. 

Anakin wasn’t very talkative. Padme tried- but he was a focused man, and felt closer to finding his mother than he had in a decade. You were a silent support, beside the senator, as though you could take some of the weight off of Anakin’s shoulders. Every emotion he experienced seemed to radiate out from him, and it almost made your head pound to get blasted with them all- the guilt, the fear, the anger. You just hoped that he’d find his mother alive, or else, you imagined, this would get so much worse. 

When you left the ship again, you found yourself in the most flat, barren landscape you’d ever seen. Growing up among the skyscrapers of Coruscant, it was almost unfathomable, to look out at the horizon and see nothing between you and it. 

There was, however, one little building, which you could gather was your destination. And a droid. 

Anakin’s mind must have been clouded by his emotion, or maybe he just wasn’t showing it, because you could feel that something was off. From the moment C-3PO requested to go inside, you knew that there was nothing but bad news here. You couldn’t say anything, though- you felt it wasn’t your place. Anakin was among his family, now, even if they’d never met him, and he needed to hear it from them. 

You could tell. Shmi Skywalker was gone. 

“It was just before dawn,” Cliegg Lars explained, “they came out of nowhere. A hunting party of Tusken Raiders.” You had heard of them before- in Anakin’s ramblings of the pod racing he did as a child. You sat at the end of the table opposite Cliegg, though it did feel informal. The head of the table was meant for anyone other than you, surely- but Anakin had his place at Cliegg’s right hand, and Owen at his left. 

“Your mother had gone out early, like she always did, to pick mushrooms off the vaporators.” At the very least, you were silently happy that Shmi had spent her last years as a free woman with a husband that clearly cared about her greatly. 

“From the tracks, she was about halfway home...” Your heart broke with every word for Anakin Skywalker, who had spent years dreaming of returning for his mother, only to arrive too late. “...When they took her.” Anakin’s face was devoid of clear emotion, but you knew him well- you could see that famous temper brewing inside of him. But, this was more than a frustration. This was so much deeper than that. 

“Those tuskens walk like men,” Cliegg continued with a sigh, “but they’re mindless, vicious monsters. Thirty of us went out after her, four of us came back.” You lowered your head in respect, but kept your eyes on your friend, whose brows were tightly knit. He was thinking, mulling it over, considering, processing. You couldn’t blame him, but wished you could make it easier. 

“I’d be out there with them, but...” Cliegg, too, was weighed down by his grief. His loss, you could see, was still just as raw as Anakin’s. “After I lost my leg, I just couldn’t ride anymore, until I heal.” Anakin’s heart seemed to break open wider with every moment that passed him by, and Cliegg continued, trying to reassure his lost stepson that his mother hadn’t died unloved. 

“I don’t want to give up on her, but she’s been gone a month.” Unimaginable it was how much it must’ve hurt Anakin to know that he had missed her by only a month. “There’s little hope she’s lasted this long.”

And there it was- the clear implication to Anakin that his mother was not only gone, but dead. That there was a finality to it, and nothing he could do. You watched him, carefully, as he turned his head, and clearly you could see that he didn’t take such helplessness well. 

He stood, and you made to do the same, but the both of you were interrupted by Owen, asking Anakin’s intensions. 

“To find my mother,” Anakin said, and you let out a short breath. 

“Your mother’s dead, son,” Cliegg said, with the voice of a heartbroken husband, “Accept it.” 

Anakin left without a word. 

You followed, knowing his plan. 

“Anakin, it’s dangerous,” you told him, and he turned, shaking his head. 

“I’m going. I have to.” 

“I know,” you said, and in the gaze you shared with him, he realized that you meant to come with him. 

Padme emerged from the entrance, and her gaze met yours. You nodded, and she gathered that you hadn’t been able to stop him. You hadn’t tried. 

“You’re gonna have to stay here,” you said, a little more hardness in your tone than you had intended. “You’ll be safe until we return.” Anakin stood behind you, grief and anger rolling off of him, and though she could not feel the Force, Padme clearly could see a man in pain. After all, Padme Amidala is a really good person. She walked to him and gave him a brief hug. 

“We won’t be long,” you promised as they parted, and as she retreated inside, you followed him to the speeder. 

The longer he rode, the more anguish he felt. He hardened before you, from a boy who lost his mother, to a man who sought revenge. You could only hope you would serve to curb the damage. 

Just after nightfall you reached the encampment of the raiders, their domes still lit by dying fires. You deferred to Anakin’s lead, assuming that he would know your enemy better than you. It had been a while since the two of you had gone on a mission together- if the atmosphere were less dire, you might have even enjoyed it. 

You don’t know how he chose which dome to enter, but it was the right one. You felt the world change when Anakin laid eyes on the bloodied woman tied to a post, like you were recognizing her yourself. Shmi Skywalker, still alive.

“Go,” you whispered, stationing yourself between the opening of the dome and the opening Anakin had created. His reunion was his own, and you gave him the best security and privacy you could. It was astounding that she had survived, all this time, and for a moment you were filled with hope, joy, that he had disobeyed Cliegg and searched for her anyway. Otherwise, she likely never would have been found. You kept your eyes to the night outside the dome, a lookout, your breathing calm with the joy and love and relief that Anakin had once again allowed into his body. 

And then you felt it change. 

You whirled around, and she was dead, and Anakin’s silence was suddenly all you could hear. The world was turning red around the both of you as he felt the grief of his mother’s death for a second time, and his eyes lifted to yours. 

“Anakin,” you breathed, knowing nothing else to say. His grief hardened into anger, but he gently closed her eyes and held her close. You didn’t know what to do. Panic hit you hard as his anger curdled into rage, and his eyes lifted. 

“Anakin, we need to take her home,” you said, hoping to deflect his focus. He didn’t listen. 

As he lowered her gently to the floor so that he could stand, you tried to move into his way, and successfully you cupped his face, catching his eyes for just a moment. In them, you didn’t see the anger you felt from him. In them, you saw so much sadness. 

And so you let him go. 

It wasn’t the Jedi way, you knew that. And you wished you could will yourself to move, to stop him, because the pain that his actions would cause would haunt him, possibly for the rest of his life. But it felt as though he needed this, as though it was the only thing that would sate his soul. So you breathed mantras, and did your best to combat his anger with peace, thinking that it might invade him. 

And when the Tusken Raiders had all given their last breaths to Anakin Skywalker, you went to him. 

He collapsed to his knees under his own weight, no longer grieving but feeling a consuming emptiness. You had to force yourself to block it out as you ran to him, and pulled him against you. Never before had you felt someone who needed a hug so bad, and only then did he begin to break, knotting his fingers into the robes at your back. He buried his face, but did not cry, and you stayed as long as he needed you to. 

You drove home. He held his mother, behind you, cradling her like she had once held him. You rode through sunrise, back to Cliegg’s home, where quickly you were met by Owen, Padme, Cliegg, Beru. You dismounted quickly and retreated, knowing that this was Anakin’s moment, and his alone. His anger had returned, but it didn’t feel so sharp anymore- it was anger and sadness and frustration, and it just felt to you like pain. Incredible pain. 

You stayed in the room with him, wherever he went, continuing the strategy you’d had back at the camp. You held peace in your chest, and hoped that he could feel it the way you felt his pain. You hoped it would calm him. His pain did not fade, but it did dull, and for a while as he tinkered with the shifter, it felt as though maybe the anger had drained from his body. 

Padme entered with two meals, and she handed one to you before approaching Anakin, her footsteps light, but her presence noticeable. 

“I brought you something,” she said over his shoulder, and when he didn’t respond, she moved around to his front. “Are you hungry?”

“The shifter broke,” he told her, and if it wouldn’t have taken from your concentration you would’ve chuckled. He avoided the question- you knew he hadn’t eaten in at least a day. “Life seems so much simpler when you’re fixing things.” You would give anything to have back the boy you’d trained with on Corellia. So heavy Anakin felt now, with everything that had happened. You wished you could give him back the peace he had once felt. Padme looked to you briefly as she moved to set down the tray near Anakin, and you nodded. You’d get him to eat eventually. 

“I’m good at fixing things,” Anakin continued, “always was.” Padme turned back to him slowly, the both of you noticing the waver in his voice. “But I couldn’t...” he trailed off, putting down his tools. “Why’d she have to die? Why couldn’t I save her?” You sat up, more toward your feet, ready to approach him if you felt the need. He was getting ramped up again, but the jagged edges of his grief this time was less anger and more blame. Blame on the Tuskens, blame on himself. “I know I could have!” He turned from Padme and for the briefest of moments his eyes met yours, but he moved forward, away from both of you.

“Sometimes there are things no one can fix,” Padme said softly, and you kept your breathing steady to combat his erratic emotion. “You’re not all powerful, Ani.” 

“Well, I should be,” he said, giving her words no time to hang in the air. 

“Anakin,” you said, showing disapproval of such a thought, and for the first time wished Obi-Wan was there. 

“Someday I will be,” he insisted. “I will be the most powerful Jedi ever.” He turned to face you and Padme again, tears glistening on his face but his expression angry. You didn’t know what to say, even when he levied his gaze toward you. 

“I promise you. I will even learn to stop people from dying.” 

“Anakin,” it was Padme’s turn to say, and what he said next shook you to your core.

“It’s all Obi-Wan’s fault!” he shouted, “He’s jealous! He’s holding me back!” Anakin launched whatever he’d picked up across the room, and it clattered quietly before coming to rest. 

“You know that’s not true,” you said, quickly rising to your feet. You took a step closer to Anakin as he turned away, but did not get too near. 

“I know,” he conceded under his breath. Padme sensed what was really going on.

“What’s wrong, Ani?’ She asked, and finally you realized what was truly causing his pain, in this moment. He was looking at his hands as he stuttered the beginning of a sentence, the hands that had killed so many. 

The peace in your body faltered- if you had stopped him, he wouldn’t be grieving nearly so much now. It was your fault.

“I killed them,” he explained, “I killed them all. They’re dead- every single one of them.” He turned to Padme with rage at himself and the raiders twitching his lips, tears still falling from his eyes. “And not just the men, but the women and the children, too. They’re like animals, and I slaughtered them like animals!” You lowered your head, trying to push away your own guilt so that you could be there for him. His pain, you knew, was greater than yours. 

“I hate them!” 

Hate leads to suffering. 

As Anakin sank to the floor, you and Padme sat to flank his sides. You were his best friend, closer to him than anyone else in the world, and so you leaned against his side while Padme offered her words. 

“To be angry is to be human.” 

“I’m a Jedi,” Anakin insisted, “I know I’m better than this.”

“Most Jedi never know their parents,” you said softly, “and never form attachments. There is no one in a Jedi’s life who matters as much as your mother does to you. I’m sure you’re taking this with more grace than Master Windu would have.” Anakin didn’t laugh, but he did quiet, almost as though he believed you. Slowly you found the hand he held beside his knee, and gathered it into yours. 

Padme leaned forward and gave him the best hug she could from the side, but then left Anakin alone with you. 

She’s a good person, like that. 

“Anakin, I’ve known you for a long time,” you started quietly, “and all of that time I’ve known you to be a kind man. A compassionate man. Quick to anger, yes, but not to judgement. They earned your rage, and that’s okay. It does not outweigh all of the good you’ve done in your life.” His grip tightened on your hand, still his breathing erratic, but once again the jagged edges of his mind began to soften. You let silence drift into the room for a moment as he slowly evened. 

“She was beautiful,” you said, laying your head down onto his shoulder. He nodded, and slowly, there grew the beginning of a smile on his face. “And she won’t be forgotten.” 

-🦌 Roe

[waywardnerd67]

The Ghost of Christmas Past

Summary: Arriving onto the set of a Christmas photoshoot, Jensen is faced with someone from his past. Characters: Jensen Ackles, Reader Pairing: Jensen x Reader Warnings: Slight Angst/Fluff Word Count: 1527 Square Filled: Christmas Photoshoot Bingo Card: @spnchristmasbingo​

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Jensen groaned as the alarm on his phone chimed. Since the ending of Supernatural the last few months had been blissfully alarm free for him until his manager begged him to be part of a Entertainment Weekly Christmas special issue. He loved everyone at Entertainment Weekly and knew it would be great PR for his upcoming role in The Boys. Now, as he stared at his phone flashing the time, he was regretting ever agreeing to the photoshoot.

He pulled himself out of his comfy bed and made himself presentable to the outside world. His brown hair was longer falling into his eyes and the sides were highlighted with strands of silver and copper. Running his hands through it once, leaving it for hair and make-up would deal with it. He ran his hands down his scruffy beard that was more ginger than anything with specks of salt and pepper. He slipped on some joggers and a hoodie to make his way down to the lobby of his hotel.

As usually, the EW studios were chaotic with celebrities and journalists all around. He was ushered into a dressing room where his manager was waiting for him. They went over some talking points for his interview with Sam Highfill before the stylists came in to make him all pretty. They had him a rich forest green suit with cream color pinstripes and matching Oxford button down. Thankfully, they left the shirt unbuttoned at the top which meant no tie. He slipped on the glossy black dress boots and followed the assistant to the studio.

There were a few other former CW stars mingling about including Stephen Amell and David Ramsey. Jensen took a deep breath before putting on his professional mask socializing with everyone. It had been awhile since he spoke with Amell and genuinely enjoyed catching up with him. His new wrestling show, Heels, sounded intense, terrifying and a lot of fun. The studio door closed shut signaling the arrival of the photographer.

“Sorry everyone, we had a camera malfunction. I appreciate your patience.”

The moment her voice echoed throughout the room the hairs on his arms stood up and goosebumps spread down his skin. Memories of long drives to the beach and kissing under the stars flashing in his mind. He looked over to where she was setting up her tripod and though it had been over fifteen years since he last saw her she still made his heart race.

Her long legs were covered by tight denim with her traditional Chuck Taylors on her feet. A red and green flannel was tied loosely around her slender waist being held mostly by the curve of her hips. Her favorite band memorialized on her shirt. The memory of being front row with her and reaping the reward for enduring the god awful pop music later that night. The corner of his lips curling upward as his eyes traveled further up her body.

Her beautiful (Y/C/H) hair swept away from her face as she focused on the task at hand. Nimble, delicate fingers working over each knob of her camera. Glancing up is when her vibrant (Y/C/E) eyes met his and her full bottom lip disappeared beneath her teeth. She looked away quickly refocusing on her camera and assistant speaking to her. She must have known he would be here, that they would see one another. The memory of the last time they spoke dragging itself to the forefront of his mind. His shoulders slumped forward from the invisible guilt resting heavily on them.

“I’m going to take the group shots first then individual photos. Sam will come out to get you when she is ready for your interview. This is Rina, my assistant, and she will be helping me keep you all in line.”

There was a wave of laughter before Rina clapped her hands getting everyone on their marks. Jensen tried to shake off the memories of them and took his spot beside everyone else. His head snapping to her as she turned on her bluetooth speaker. Her favorite band piercing his ears, she giggled as he rolled her eyes.

As the photoshoot went on and he completed his interview with Sam. He walked back into the studio where it was empty except for her and him. She was looking down at her phone when he walked over to her.

“Hello (Y/N).”

Her eyes met his. An electrical current building around them. Standing, she extended her hand to him formally, professional.

“Hello Jensen, nice to see you again.”

A spark ignited as their hands clasped together. Each of them flinching from the suddenly tingling shooting up their arms. (Y/N) withdrew her hand and began to fiddle with her camera.

“I’m going to take a few headshots then finish up with some candids with the music playing. Sound good?”

He nodded, shoving the overwhelming urge to pull her to him to the deepest part of his core. (Y/N) moved around snapping pictures with the grace of a dancer mesmerizing him. With each touch posing him for various shots sent his body buzzing. She motioned for him to stand then the familiar tunes of Led Zeppelin filled the room.

“I figured I’ll get better photos with music you actually like.” (Y/N) stepped in front of him, slipping her hands beneath his jacket pushing it down his arms.

He held his breath, choking on the satisfying sigh that wanted to escape his lips. A breathy gasp escaping her own as her hands drifted over his toned arms. Chuckling, flashing her a smile that made her suck in a quick breath before her face shifted lowering the professional mask once again.

“You have free reign to move as you please and I will take the photos I need.”

A distant memory flew into mind of them camping one summer. He had driven her mad by simple, mindless movements that were natural to any one. Wanting to get her riled up, he started off easy by tapping his foot and hand to the beat. Bobbing his head from side to side and closing his eyes. He did not need to see her to know her eyes were on him. Beside the clicking of her camera, he could feel her intense stare making him bolder.

Walking around the small area, he played a little air drums parting his lips to mouth the words of the song. A small growl coming from (Y/N)’s direction adding fuel to his fire. The song was almost over so it was time for him to go big. One foot up on the small stool he had been sitting on, invisible mic in his hand, Jensen belted out the last chorus. As the song faded out, he looked over to see (Y/N)’s narrowed eyes on him. Her lips curled into a devious smirk with her arms crossed over her chest.

Then came the slowly building applause from behind her as the CW stars stood watching in awe of his performance. His cheeks burning brought a wider smile on her face. To see that smile was worth the embarrassment.

“Encore! Encore!” Stephen Amell called out as they all walked back into the hallway leading to the dressing rooms.

“Well played Ackles, well played.” She picked up his jacket handing it to him, “I have all the photos I need.”

There was a brief moment where they stood silently both waiting for the other to say something. (Y/N) grasped his hand for a moment, “Honestly, it was good to see you again.” She pressed her soft lips to his cheek before leaving the room quickly.

Two weeks had gone by, Jensen found himself thinking about (Y/N) every moment he could. Desperate to reach out to her but not know the best way to go about it. Sitting in his office, daydreaming about her for the millionth time the front doorbell rang. Opening the door, immediately froze in place. There she stood as if he had materialized her from his thoughts.

“Are you going to invite me in or just stare at me?”

He stammered, “Y-Yeah, of course, come in. I’m just surprised to see you.”

“Yeah, two weeks of you plaguing my mind was enough for me…”

He did not let her finish before his hand slipped behind her head bringing her lips to his. Her body tensing before molding into his returning his advance passionately. Pulling away from her, Jensen rested his forehead against hers.

“I should have never let you go in the first place. I should have stood my ground with my managers then and rejected their ridiculous assumptions. I’m so sorry.”

The soft pads of her thumbs brushed away the wayward tears sliding down his cheeks, “I forgave you a long time ago Jensen. All that matters now is what we do moving forward.”

He brought his hand up to her cheek, (Y/N) leaning into his touch, “Right now, I’m going to kiss you again.”

Her brilliant smile took his breath away, “I think that is a good step to take.”

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