#did any of this make sense? find out next time on toTAL drAMA isLAND

[crazycoke-addict]

Why Scott is a good antagonist

Scott is the main antagonist of total drama revenge of the island and I believe he's up there with alejandro and heather. While Scott does have a fan base of his own, I think there's a debate in the total drama fandom about whether or not Scott should be up there with the likes of Heather, Alejandro and even the ice dancers in Ridonculous race. I believe that he does.

Scott's plan is pretty different to other villains because it involves around loosing. His strategy is to make sure his team loose so the other team has this false sense of confidence he picks them off one by one. Scott isn't the first person to sabotage his team but he's the main villain to do so. Heather hates loosing and any team she is placed in teams they mostly win and Alejandro tends to be frustrated whenever his team loose during world tour. But Scott doesn't want to win because winning will ruined his plan. A lot of fans might this is dumb idea because he's putting a target on his back, but loosing is a key to success.

Loosing is a good thing because the many times you loose, the lessons you learn from it. You see this when Scott plans his next strategy by learning from his previous. This is seen with B's elimination and even Dawn's. In Ice Ice Baby, Scott decides that B has to go since he is making the team win which Scott doesn't want. While his teammates are distracted Scott has the opportunity to sabotage the challenge and putting the blame on B. Scott also convinced the other teammates to vote him off. But he knows he can't do it up until the merge. If he ends up blaming other teammates and he's only one doing so than someone like Sam or even Dawn would take notice. For Dawn, she was getting too close to finding out the truth in backstabber Ahoy. Through the episode, the camper's stuff goes missing and at first Scott decides to put the blame on brick since he's been on both teams. However Dawn takes notice what Scott has been doing by purposefully making him loose and decides to put the stuff that he stole in Dawn's trash bag that she was carrying throughout the episode.

Dawn is a weird and interesting character who just know people's personal life by looking through their auras. There's something that Dawn goes. She literally glides in the picture so her stealing their stuff without them noticing. Scott could use that advantage. While Scott only does the fake immunity statue for the one time, but we see him making another one so if any of the campers especially the ones that are on his team would find an invincibility statue but would questioned if its the real one or a fake one. Scott is the only one knows the difference. That's why he ended up being the one to find the immunity before anyone else did. Another thing I think that Scott is a great antagonist is what happens in grand chef auto.

It appears that Scott can manipulate a person to confirmed a suspicion. Like how Cameron confirmed that Mike has a multiple personality disorder even though Scott didn't know himself. In grand chef auto, Scott used Mike as blackmailed towards him having DID in order not to tell zoey. Messing with someone's mental health is messed up but it's also genius to do so. Throughout the episode, Mike helps Scott until Mike decided he had enough so Scott ended up having someone else to help with the form of Vito. All this happened just for Scott to get immunity and vote Mike off. It's so evil, cold and cruel but that's what a villain is supposed to be.

[ultraericthered]

Anime Update V2 49

NOTICE: There’ll be something of a hiatus before the next of these posts due to two reasons - it’s the big V2 50 and I want to prepare extra for it, and I’m currently on vacation and started on a special anime rewatch (my current icon should clue you in).

Tokyo Magnitude 8.0 - Episode 1 of this series was certainly something, spending its whole run time on just showing us what the main characters are doing at that time in their lives, a steady but anxious build up to when Mirai tempts fate by saying the whole world could break apart for all she cared...and then at that very moment, it does. Even before the earthquake, this is a bit of a challenge to sit through since Mirai is just such an unlikable little shit of a main protagonist, but I love that she is because it’s in a very human, dare I say even relatable sort of way and adds that much more weight to the drama that’s going to be unfolding with her as our lead. In the dub, Luci Christian is almost unrecognizable in her performance as Mirai, same going for Tiffany Grant as her little brother Yuki. Side characters aren’t so fortunate, as the likes of Brittany Karbowski and Greg Ayres are very distinct to make out, and apparently they will be used a lot. Lastly, that “M/elody” ending song is a major banger!

Hunter x Hunter - While Hisoka meets back up with the Spiders as they intend on tracking down a Nen user whose ability can remove others' Nen, and Gon continues his training with Biscuit while Killua is recuperating his hands, Team Tsezgerra takes on Team Genthru. And after all that action, there was a startling twist at the end where Tsezgerra exits the game but finds no one on guard where all the Greed Island consoles are stored, finds Mr. Battera crying as he reveals the whole deal behind the game has been cancelled, and then Team Genthru break in there too, free to reign as they please!

Fruits Basket - An episode that started out cute with a talk between Hiro and Kisa turns into a major downer when we follow Rin and finally learn her devastating backstory. On top of the parents who adopted her being super fake and ultimately heartless creatures who had no business looking after a child in the first place, the romantic relationship with Haru that she got into causes her more trouble when she starts fearing that she’s going to drag him down and keep him bound to the Zodiac Curse, and then just to pile the trauma on more, Akito fucking pushes her off a balcony and sends her to the hospital! No wonder this poor girl is so beyond messed up now...

Date A Live S4 - Uh...okay, I noted that something was off when it looked like Shido was going to be killed in his room only for him to not be, but I totally didn’t anticipate the reveal of him having been killed by DEM already and having been saved from such deaths 204 times by Kurumi. Suddenly, everything about what Kurumi had been doing these past few episodes, the whole deal with Shido included, made so much more sense. The reveal I did see coming, however, was that <PHANTOM>, mysterious agent of the Spirit of Origins who’s created all the other Spirits, is actually Reine...or at least some version of her since the Reine we know is still with the Ratatyskr crew elsewhere at the same time. And then the episode just sort of ends without any finality, but we’re told that this is leading directly into Date A Live 5, the final season. Will have to await that for a while, but I hope it ends up looking and playing out better than this season did. 

Re:ZERO - Picked this up with two episodes that showed us a return to the capitol, the gathering of the Royal Selection candidates (Emilia, Priscilla, Krusch and Anastasia), the surprise reveal of Felt as the fifth and final candidate because apparently she has a noble blood lineage and Reinhard decides to be her knight (and while I’m selective about when I support systemic reformations via anarchy and forceful upheavals, I’m 100% with my girl Felt on her intended revolution based on what we’ve seen of this place!), Subaru being a dumbass by deliberating disobeying Emilia and showing up at the event (and some hints that Roswaal might’ve factored that into his mysterious plans), uncomfortable prejudice and scorn being thrown at Meelie for being a silver-haired half elf, and Sir Julius being totally justified in his anger at Subaru only to then take that rage completely off the rails by challenging him to a duel to the death over it! Geezus!

But it was everything after Subaru got thoroughly clobbered by Julius that sticks out the most in my memory, this absolutely breathtakingly harsh final scene between him and Emilia where Subaru is berated and tries over and over to justify to Emilia (and to himself) why he had to do what he did for her sake and to repay the debt he believes he owes her for all the loops she’s helped him in, all while holding Emilia up on a pedestal that she never asked to be put on. But as Meelie refuses to take his shit, eventually the guy just completely cracks and goes full Mask Off, rambling about how it’s actually he who should be owed a debt by Emilia for all the great things he’s done for her, that the courage and generosity he’s shown her and all the help he’s given her entitles him to the best treatment, including being Emilia’s knight. I was slackjawed at this moment and internally rooting for Meelie to LEAVE. HIS. ASS. And thank heavens, that’s what she does. Seeing how unstable and needy he is, and how poisonous their association with each other has gotten, Emilia cuts ties with Subaru and leaves him in the recovery room a pitiful, sobbing wreck. And folks, this is only the peak of the downhill slope! Rock bottom still awaits Subaru Natsuki in episodes to come...

Fate/Stay Night: Unlimited Blade Works - Honestly I found it a bit unnecessary to follow the premiere with ANOTHER one hour special episode just to catch us up with Shirou and explain where Saber came from. It was interesting to see some ground retread for this animation style and these new dub VAs, and also some material never adpated in the Deen anime (I particularly liked seeing Matt Mercer-voiced Kiritsugu again, that shit hits hard after Fate Zero), the one detriment is still Shirou’s voice. Bryce Papenbrook’s weird midway between Naegi and Nagito that he uses doesn’t do it for me, so I’m always going to think of Sam Reigel as Shirou Emiya. 

Symphogear G - The final two episodes of this season matched up in both expectation and quality to its predecessor. The fight between Kirika and Shirabe leading to them just holding nothing back in confessing love to each other was not a surprise, though seeing Shirabe also having Fine’s soul and abilities, Kirika’s attempted suicide, and a divine meeting with Fine herself certainly were. Also sort of predicted but still loved seeing Chris turn out to be a double agent, having worked out a deal with Tsubasa without a single word needing to be spoken between them. The big turnaround for Maria, the last stand of Dr. Ver, and the passing of Nastassja were perfectly satisfactory (Ver’s super Extra hamminess, constant cowardice, and big mental breakdown were especially great to watch), and we got a cosmic level final battle to put the previous finale’s final action to shame! Hibiki being totally free of the Gugnir scrap in her heart, Miku playing a key part in saving the day, the villainous Symphogears now joining the main friend group, and the message at the end were all multiple cherries on top of a concoction that already tasted so sweet. 

MAR - Nanashi VS Gallian. This is what the whole round was being built up to since before it started, so it had better damn be interesting. And oooh man, was it ever. Turns out Gallian is the former leader of Nanashi’s guild who’d found Nanashi and brought him into the guild, gave him a name, trained him and worked alongside him as a brother, and made him his successor...but Nanashi at first could not recall any of this because Gallian had wiped his memory of him! Seeing Galian with the Chess Pieces now, I thought to myself  “wouldn’t it be something if we learn how far back this goes and that Gallian was never that good a guy to start with...”, and the show went on to give me exactly that! This scumbag even let Peta slaughter so many of his former comrades and raze his old home to the ground, feeling no remorse for trading it all out for power! Once we knew this, I was really wanting to see Nanashi take him down, and the moment it happened was oh so glorious to witness.

Gintama - Circled back around to that beach episode I gave a pass on earlier since I’m on a beach vacation right now. Odd Jobs, Otae, and Taizo Hasegawa head to the beach to get rid of a monster that's been terrorizing the area. It goes about exactly as you’d expect.

AND

Gurren Lagann, Kill La Kill, & Sakugan - Gurren Lagann was just Gurren Lagann (the weird as shit episode 6 that seems to exist just to riff on stupid anime tropes while reveling in its own stupidity and making fools of every character) and Kill La Kill was just Kill La Kill (Nui’s majorly trolling and Ryuko’s majorly hating, at the cost of poor Senketsu!), Sakugan was an entirely new experience. I’ll admit that the main characters names made me laugh a lot of times when they got spoken (”Gagumber” and “Memempu” just sound so silly), and the whole thing was just all kinds of strange and goofy for the most part, but the idea that they’re a single father and daughter team out to survive in an enviornment where there are kaiju and other such hazards out to kill them definitely has promise. Also, that death of the other father-daughter team - what was that? That was so much tonally darker and more dramatic than anything else in the episode! Are such random demises going to be a thing here? Cuz I think we’d need more mental preparation and down time!

[outspokensarchive]

new york’s very own devin bahar was spotted on broadway street , with a striking semblance to bella hadid ! you may know them as @d.bahar or hitting the front page of tmz as bahar donates 2m dollars and pieces from her latest clothing release to various womens shelters around the city . according to tmz , you just had your twenty-fourth birthday bash . while living in nyc , you’ve been labeled as being a workaholic , but also ambitious . things that would paint a better picture of you would be compassion, taking photographs of the city, & the night sky . ( cisfemale + she/her  ) +  (  katie , 22 , she/her , est ).

Hello, yes, I am so dang-shabang excited to see Wealthy back ( back, back again ) ! This introduction is going to be a hella-mess because I haven’t written an intro in months so, bare with me here. But I’m Katie — your local anti-social, anxiety filled, overly stressed college student — and I am going to attempt to write up a somewhat quick intro on my bby Devin — your overly stressed, intense workaholic, “vacation-who?”, with 300+ occupations because 299 just isn’t good enough, mom friend.

PERSONALITY & QUICK THINGS ;

Very much a perfectionist when it comes to her own work. Will spend countless hours looking over the same exact details of the same project until she’s positive it’s exactly how she wants it.

Tries to be a positive influence and energy in the world. Definitely the type of person you can turn to when you’re having a bad day and you need someone that naturally gives off positive, pleasant energy. Or if you’re looking for someone that’s willing to bend over backwards, sideways, and do two backflips to try and help you feel better.

Very, very much a giver. She always tries to find ways to be as helpful as possible to others, wanting everyone to feel loved and like they belong.

Has a like-dislike relationship with social gatherings. Enjoys making new friends and tends to enjoy being around people, for the most part. But after some amount of time, she often becomes exhausted by being around too many people at once. It tends to be emotionally draining, in a way, for her. Along with the fact that she’s not a ‘party person’, this is partly why she doesn’t go to many big social events unless they’re more work-related — very much a homebody, in a sense.

Talkative when she feels a certain amount of comfort around someone, somewhat quiet and pretty closed-off if she doesn’t.

Generous and giving, far from greedy. Prefers to help others and share the wealth she has earned, rather than keep it all to her self. She’s greatly involved in charities and often helps plans events and donates frequently. 

Doesn’t ? Really ? Get ? Angry ? Might get slightly put off, somewhat irked, annoyed-maybe, but angry hasn’t really ever been a thing ? 

Has the patience of a saint I tell you — I could never.

A very organized, neat, and clean person. Is very much the type of person where she has labeled jars in her kitchen for spices and just about everything in her home has a specific place. No doubt, has her own label maker tbh. Absolutely has a planner that she actually uses.

Is the type of person to try and be there for everyone — but never expects people to be there for her. You’ll find her always offering her shoulder to lean on and being there if you need someone to talk to but there’s very few people she’ll actually talk to about her own problems.

EXTRA INFORMATION LINKS ;

about page !

listen this has everything: a biography section ( i.. haven’t looked it over since i last edited it so don’t @ me ), statistics with it’s own information, a quick facts tab that should be entirely different from my intro facts if i remember right from the last time i edited it, and a section entirely dedicated to my love for taking quizzes and tests to get to know characters.

i’m always adding to it tbh

pinterest board !

spotify playlist !

musings tag !

connections page !

wanted connections tag !

I think that’s all for this? I have a ton of information on her about page so I wanted to keep this pretty quick and simple. I also procrastinated an assignment that I need to get done so — priorities. But if there’s anything else you’d like to know about my bby bean that wasn’t on here or on any of her other pages, absolutely feel free to hit me up because I can ramble for hours tbh. But if you wanna’ plot, feel free to shoot a message my way here or on di*cord @ katie#7666, because I might be the !worst at plotting, but I do be out here trying my absolute best.

[jayswritings13]

Total Drama: Unsaid confessions

Dialogue Prompt: #7 (“Listen, me holding you hand and all of this, doesn’t mean shit.” “Okay…” “…..unless you want it to mean something.”)

Character: Heather (Total Drama)

Requested by: Anon

Note: I had a lot of fun writing for Heather! She is definitely my favorite!!

Word Count: 650

💗Masterlist | WIP Page

"Listen, me holding your hand and all of this, doesn't mean shit." Heather scoffed, turning her head away from your gaze, but keeping a tight grip on your hand in hers. Afterall, she couldn't show too much weaknesses in front of the others. She did have a reputation of being the show's mean girl and she intended to keep it that way. There was one problem though, you.

Heather found it really annoying that you could just exist and her focus and train of thought could easily be ripped from her grasp. It was a damn inconvenience.

"Okay...." You grinned, keeping your gaze on Heather's face, watching as it kept turning more and more pink. You had to stop everything in you from laughing at the face that Heather twisted her face away from you, probably in hopes of hiding her color changing face. It didn't work.

"......unless you want it to mean something." Heather whispered.

"What?" You immediately stepped in front of her, forcing her to face you.

"Do not make me repeat it."

Even with the frosty exterior and shifty gaze, watching for any signs of the other campers or Chris, Heather seemed more sincere than you've ever seen her be.

"Listen, you're the only one on this island I can stand, alright?" Heather said, clearly annoyed by the silence coming from you. "And that's a very high compliment. I mean, have you seen someone the people that Chris let on this show?"

"Is that all?"

Okay, so you were mostly definitely pushing your luck with this. You knew that this was mostly likely the extent of Heather's confession to you, but you couldn't help it---you wanted an actual confession from her. Without the snark or her bitchy attitude for one moment.

"Well," Heather paused, biting down on her lip and you felt your heart in your throat, suddenly forgetting how to breathe. "yeah." Heather scoffed with a quick roll of her eyes. "What else is there to say?" You pulled your gaze away from Heather, hoping that she could not sense your immense disappointment.

So much You wanted to scream. How about the one thing that neither of us can seem to say

"Besides, actions speak louder than words, or something stupid like that."

You snapped your head, daring to shoot a look over at the queen bee, and shocked to find her steely grey eyes locked on your expression. It was quiet for a moment, but that was just fine because you wanted nothing more than to freeze this moment in time.

Heather was very aware of the surroundings, but also very aware of how your hand was still enveloped in hers. She was also very aware of your eyes on her, and was almost afraid to move or speak as to not stop or interrupt anything. Afterall, Heather had your undivided attention and she was not too keen on letting it go.

"Screaming Gophers, elimination ceremony time! Get your butts to the confessional and vote."

"Fucking Chris," Heather muttered.

"Well, I guess we better go and get ready for the elimination ceremony." You added, despite the clear sad tone in your voice.

And it was that exact tone that made Heather think quickly of what to say next. Of what to do next.

As you stepped out of the clearing in the woods and toward the camp grounds, Heather tightened her grip on your hand, causing you to freeze.

"Let's do this again."

"What hold hands?" You grinned, despite the explosion of butterflies in your stomach at the notion that Heather wanted to do this again. "Or do something more?" You smirked.

"Whatever" Heather scoffed. "As long as it's not in the woods next time. It's like you want me to get eaten by a bear." And just like that, the Heather that the others in the camp saw was back.

"You?" You laughed, pulling Heather closer to you, "Never."

It was the rare moment when Heather actually believed that.

[starrysnowdrop]

Patch 6.2 MSQ and Pandaemonium Thoughts

So, I have completed the MSQ and the Pandaemonium story quests, and I needed time to process it all to gather my thoughts. I have yet to do Island Sanctuary or Tataru’s questline, so those thoughts might come later once I have completed those. For now, here’s my thoughts on patch 6.2 so far!

First, some non spoilery stuff! I’m absolutely in love with the Pandaemonium normal raid gear!! The fire effects are spot on Yume aesthetic, with one of the elements that I associate with her is fire. I already got the boots and I’m going for the gloves next just to get her item level up, but next week I’ll be going for the helm at least. I’m holding off on farming for the chest piece until the new patch hype calms down a bit, as there are people doing P5-P8 now just to get the chest, and I don’t have the patience for that. Oh and in case you’re wondering, Yume’s main job I’m farming gear for is Sage, so she’s going to have the full healing gear hopefully in a few weeks!

Now here come the spoilers, which I’ll put under a cut. You’ve been warned!

MSQ

I was pleasantly surprised that we learned so many new things about the nature of voidsent and the world of the Thirteenth that we didn’t already know from the lore. How the voidsent die and respawn so quickly is fascinating to me, and it makes total sense with what we now know of the element of Darkness. The lore buff in me was squealing with delight over this.

Zero has to be a highlight in patch 6.2 in general for me. Oh my, did they do a fantastic job on her character! She looks so badass and beautiful, her personality is great, her backstory is really interesting and I want to know more, and I already know that she’s going to be shipped with other WoLs immediately.

The atmosphere of the Void, oh my god, I’m so in love with it! It truly feels otherworldly, and I get similar feels to how I felt arriving in the First for the first time. I took tons of screenshots of just the environments in general, as I wanted to capture how beautiful it is. I’ll be editing all of those screenshots and post them at a later date to be sure.

However, I still feel strange that I’m not that hyped for the conclusion of this story arc. I care about Vrtra/Varshahn and I want to find Azdaja, but I don’t know… I’m not that invested in the plight of the Void like I was emotionally invested in the First. This is likely in large part due to two reasons: 1) we had a whole expansion to get invested in the First, and it had way more time to flesh it all out, whereas it feels like just a detour to what the real thing is going to be in 7.0, and 2) I never played FFIV. I always wanted to, but I just didn’t take the time to play it, so all of these throwbacks to FFIV with Golbez and the Four Fiends and all of that… yeah I don’t have any investment in any of that. So I’m not sure if this is just a personal thing to me or if others can relate, but I really am just ehhhhh about the story of the MSQ right now.

The trial… yeah, the trial this time just was not epic to me whatsoever. This is an odd feeling to me because every trial we’ve had from ShB and EW was really good and I truly enjoyed doing them. I was always hyped for them, but this one��� it’s just one of the Four Fiends that I mentioned before. I was just like “uhhhh and why do I care?”

So yeah, that’s about it for MSQ. I thoroughly enjoyed the raids more so…

Pandaemonium Abyssos

Oh my god I loved Pandaemonium this time!!! The fights were so fun, and the family drama storyline was more than I ever expected and it was so good! I’m so glad that they did Lahabrea justice, and god did I get the feels so hard for Erichthonios and Lahabrea. I can’t believe the plot twist we got, as I was not expecting that at all, but I thought it was executed very well. It made me appreciate Lahabrea’s character way more than I ever did. I loved the nods to Azem in there and though the Themis is Elidibus reveal was the least surprising reveal in the history of ever, I thought it was done well.

But can we just talk a minute about the holy fucking shit cliffhanger!!! What the hell is going on?!?! How did that happen? What does this mean? And we aren’t getting answers for TWO WHOLE PATCHES?!?! Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!

Overall, yes yes I need more Pandaemonium!!!

And lastly, I don’t want to reveal it just yet, but I’m actually happy that we didn’t get any G’raha in the MSQ at all this time, because it means that the plans I have for Yume’s story going forward can come into play and I’m SO excited to be sharing it with you all really soon! So please look forward to it!!

Anyways, what did you think of the new storylines?? Let me know!

[x0401x]

Febri Talk Interview with Jin (Complete)

Commissioned by the lovely @sodasexual​ again!

Part 1: overwhelmed by the power of friendship in “The☆Doraemons: Kaitou Dorapan no Chousenjou!”

Musician and creator Jin has been bringing countless topical works to the world, including “Kagerou Project”. In the first part of this serial interview, we had him talk about a work from the series “The☆Doraemons”, which he experienced in his childhood and continued to be influenced by for a long time.

A work that unexpectedly became one of the origins of “Kagerou Project”.

——Jin-san, we would like to ask you about anime shows that have had an influence on you, following in order from your infancy onwards, so would the first one be “The☆Doraemons: Kaitou Dorapan no Chousenjou!” (hereon, “The☆Doraemons”), which came out in the year 1997?

Jin: That’s right. I watched this one in the theaters when I was either 7 or 8 years old. It’s an animation short that was screened together with “Doraemon: Nobita no Neji-maki Toshi Bounen-ki”, and it had one hell of an impact on me. At the time, I was living in an isolated island in Hokkaido called Rishiri Island, so just getting to watch a movie was quite a spectacle in itself (laughs). Actually, not many animes were broadcasted in Rishiri Island to begin with. There were few channels, and other than that, they aired those black-and-white period dramas in cable TV, I guess.

——No, I think that last one is a stretch (laughs). Did you watch “Doraemon” because you liked it from the start?

Jin: I liked it a lot. But the so-called “The☆Doraemons” is a spin-off about six friends of different colors. If I were to talk about the contents of “Kaitou Dorapan” in a summarized way, it’s the story of the Doraemons receiving a letter of challenge from an mysterious enemy called Dorapan, then completely getting caught into his trap and falling into a pinch... And, surprisingly, Doraemon isn’t active at all in this movie (laughs).

——Aah, it’s a work where the Doraemon friends are the main characters, right?

Jin: That’s right. A duo that didn’t have much popularity among the friends, Dora-med III and Dora-rinho, were set as the main characters in this one (laughs). Of course, I didn’t go watch it thinking that Doraemon would participate actively, but he almost doesn’t do anything. Instead, we were shown these two, who are something like sub-characters, in a big scuffle. But when it ended, I began to really like Dora-med III and Dora-rinho.

——Ahaha. So you totally got into it.

Jin: They had something called a “Friendship Telephone Card”, which was introduced as a key item, and this “friendship” thing made the back of my nose sting – that was the kind of feeling I got from it. Dorapan, the one who plays the role of villain in this movie, attempts to take control of robots from all over the world using the power of the Doraemons’ Friendship Telephone Card. However, there’s actually a mastermind behind the scenes, and one heroine is taken hostage, so Dorapan is doing bad deeds because he has no choice. We find this out in the middle of the movie, and at that moment, Dora-rinho goes, “I see; so that’s what was going on” and voluntarily tries to sacrifice himself. By believing in self-sacrificing friendship, everyone was able to reach a happy ending. That kind of storyline was truly wonderful... To tell you the truth, the initial motif of Kagerou Project (hereon “KagePro”) was this movie.

Making KagePro out of wanting to create his own “Doraemons”.

——Eeh, is that so!?

Jin: I created KagePro because I wanted to write about friendship, or rather, I wanted to make my own “Doraemons”. I started KagePro when I was about 20 years old, as I was vaguely beginning to realize that friendship apparently doesn’t exist at that point in life (laughs). Also, same goes to music, of course, but among the books I was reading back then, quite a lot of them had cynical views. Although these stories were my own taste, I also had the impression that there was a generational trend in them, like “people shouldn’t look at this if they’re dumb” and “those who understand this thing are admirable”. Therefore, I did my best to pretend to be like that at first, but I gradually grew tired of it...

——Ahaha. You were getting out of breath.

Jin: That’s right. So, when I looked back, I thought, “I do like ‘Kaitou Dorapan’ after all”. Therefore, if I was going to make something by myself, I decided to use it as the theme. In that sense, amongst the things I watched in my childhood, this work was a turning point. After watching it in the theater for the first time, I watched it over and over again as rental video, and because of this, I even now remember the moments when the sound effects come in.

——Generation-wise, you’re precisely from the generation of “The☆Doraemons”.

Jin: Yeah, spot-on. Also, the Doraemons from “The☆Doraemons” are comical and cute, but on the other hand, they show us that they are extremely strong-willed characters. Moreover, the Doraemons are rich in individuality – as in, everyone is irregular and there are some characters that make you go, “Isn’t that a problem?” amongst them. For example, the wolf Dora-nichov can’t speak human language (laughs).

——I see! Thinking that way, I feel like I can see the points in common with KagePro.

Jin: Also, all of them are purely good guys. The fact that they’re all good people and only have one enemy is pretty awesome. I believe that this kind of thing has an influence on the KagePro series as a whole.

Part 2: paralyzed by the hardboiled worldview of “Cowboy Bebop”.

In the second part of this interview series, where we ask Jin about anime works that influenced him, we have “Cowboy Bebop”, a masterpiece still loved by many fans even now. Here, Jin, who works as both a musician and creator, discusses thoroughly about the appeal of it.

Learning the attitude and stance for creating things.

——You talked about how not many animes were aired in your homeland, but did you keep watching anime after that?

Jin: If you mean watching on TV, anime was what I enjoyed most. However, the shows on broadcast were limited, so when it comes to series that left an impression on me, it would be things like “Card Captor Sakura”, which I used to watch with my little sister. “Kinnikuman” was also re-aired and I liked it a lot. As expected, I was weak to “friendship” (laughs). When they were fighting for the throne or whatever, man, I cried, for real. This happened around the time I was in grade school, but when I got into middle school, I stopped watching anime entirely.

——And when you came back to it, it was right on time for...

Jin: For the series that I pointed out as second in line, “Cowboy Bebop”. Because my father had made up his mind to get his hands on a satellite television called SKY Perfect TV! I think he probably wanted to watch Discovery Channel, but back then, he also included Animax in the contract. And, by sheer coincidence, a re-run of “Cowboy Bebop” began right at that timing, around 2004 or 2005, I guess. I was a middle schooler then, and there were lots of CMs that went like, “Broadcast begins on X day of X month!” together with that opening theme by Kanno Youko-san.

——So that’s what caught your interest.

Jin: There was also the fact I’d been disconnected from anime for a while, so I watched the first episode not knowing anything. And the contents weren’t aimed at children at all (laughs). Dude sprayed an eye-drop drug into his eyes, went, “UWAH—!” and died, like.

——Ahaha. It was a shock.

Jin: “Cowboy Bebop” was my first time coming in contact with a hardboiled worldview. I was like, “What’s this? It’s so cool”. Until then, I had this impression that “anime was made for kids”, but for the first time, I felt like I was watching a drama. Plus, the story was interesting, so I was super hooked as I watched it, and while doing so, the episode “Jamming with Edward” (episode 9) had an impact on me.

——Satou Dai-san was the one who wrote the script for it, right? You later came to work together with Satou-san in “LISTENERS”.

Jin: That’s right. It was such an impact that it had me thinking, “You wouldn’t be able to do that in a TV drama”. And so, this ninth episode had me completely addicted to it, and in the end, I watched it up to the finale. Later on, when I began my own creations, I noticed that what I was doing overlapped with “Cowboy Bebop”, and when this happened, I realized I was doing something quite risky (laughs). To top it off, just when I thought, “There must be lots of animes like that out there”, there was surprisingly none.

The coolness of affirming that KagePro has both pop and hardcore songs and that this is what it is about!

——Ahaha. Did “Cowboy Bebop” have any influence on you? For example, on the music side...

Jin: Hmm... if you put it that way, maybe not (laughs). Only in the variety aspect of the narrative, as people call it. Each one of the 26 episodes has wholly different colors, so to say. They felt like a gashapon from which you couldn’t tell what was coming out next.

——Like, although there were episodes where they threw in comedy to their hearts contentment, there were also episodes that showed vigorous action.

Jin: When I think about it, there are also episodes that go through a simple approach by way of genres that even I would know. I think the creators must’ve had a lot of fun when making them. So when it comes to what influenced me, it I think it was the variation of songs. I think there probably aren’t that many composers like me, who make songs one by one and have no idea what song to write next.

——As in, you do it while intentionally deciding to change the tone and genre?

Jin: Rather than that, I guess it happens naturally. I was always the type who doesn’t listen to the same genre all the time – it’s like, “Today is rock day; tomorrow is punk day”. I believe it’s possible that “Cowboy Bebop” made me think this kind of feeling was valid. The themes also don’t have to be consistent, and even if you turn upside-down the things that you had been asserting in a previous episode, their value and meaning will still hold. Moreover, I didn’t think that the people who made “Cowboy Bebop” had to plan this stuff up in their heads and study about it so that they could put it to action. It just so happened that when they drew out the things they like and lined them up, it turned out the way it did.

——So they didn’t do it while aiming for that, but rather, it turned out to have a sense of variety to it when it was finished.

Jin: And I think it’s amazing because it validates itself with that. So I guess being able to say all we have to say is what actually matters (laughs). If I were to affirm, “This is what KagePro is about!”, then that’d be pretty much it. Even though there are both pop and hardcore songs in KagePro, nobody can say, “That doesn’t feel like KagePro”. That’s why I think that the coolness of proudly declaring, ���That’s what it is!” is something I learned from Bebop. Like, “This is what’s cool”. It feels like, on my own accord, I accepted something that was like a stance to be taken when you create these kinds of things.

Part 3: obsessing over “Tokyo Godfathers”, which had developments where one couldn’t predict what lay ahead.

This is the third part of the interview series where the creator Jin talks about works that influenced him. Here, he discusses about a hidden masterpiece from the director Kon Satoshi, which also had a great influence on “Kagerou Project” and which he encountered during his vocational school years, while living a wasteful life.

——The third work is “Tokyo Godfathers” by Director Kon Satoshi, but when was it that you watched it?

Jin: It was during my vocational school years. After graduating from high school, I attended a vocational music school located in Sapporo, but my upperclassmen from that school taught me many bad ways of having fun (laughs). I used to buy lots of sick equipment. Then, obviously, I’d run out of money, so I worked to death in part-time jobs, and well, lived a wasteful life (laughs), but during that time, a friend from my class lent me a DVD of “Hidamari Sketch”. At first, I told him, “Nah, I’m not too into this kinda stuff”, but when I took it home and watched it, I wailed aloud.

——Ahaha.

Jin: That’s why I asked Asumi Kana-san (who voices Yuno) to play KagePro’s main heroine... Anyhow, “Hidamari Sketch” became the cue for me to start watching anime again. And Director Kon Satoshi was from Sapporo, so it was probably being featured in a video shop. “Tokyo Godfathers” is a 2003 movie, but I saw it in the video in 2008 or 2009.

——What piqued your interest about it?

Jin: It was tremendously well-done and fun, and on top of that, it was sharp – a work like no other up until then, I thought. A dramatic production with parallel storylines focusing on different characters is incorporated within the span of about an hour and half as if it weren’t enough. During that same time, there were also works by Mitani Kouki-san and Isaka Koutarou-san’s “Golden Slumber” was being made into live action, so I believe that the so-called multi-protagonist story kind of approach was being used in all sorts of places. But even among them, “Tokyo Godfathers” was outstandingly interesting. “Where the heck is this story heading to?” You can’t tell at all until the end. Three homeless people pick up a baby on Christmas night and try to take her to her mother, but as the story goes on, it gets to a climax like, “Does she even have a mother in the first place?”. Plus, we find out that the person who they thought to be the mother and handed the baby over to is actually someone who kidnapped her from a hospital. The story just keeps changing over and over.

As the story progresses, the characters’ pasts become visible. It was interesting that the past and present were firmly bound together.

——We can’t predict what comes next at all, huh?

Jin: So, the topic will go back to KagePro now: when I thought of writing a novel, first of all, I decided that I “wanted to do a multi-protagonist story”. To make a story like the one from “The☆Doraemons” into a multi-protagonist story. Back then, I really liked the type of novels that went on in first person – such as works by Isaka-san or Morimi Tomihiko-san, and also Yonezawa Honobu-san.

——I see, I see.

Jin: On the other hand, “Tokyo Godfathers” is structured so that the characters’ pasts can be seen more and more as the story progresses. As if the story progresses with the past mini-arcs as the main focus. Like, “Person A and Person B were actually parent and child!” – it was interesting that the past and the present were bound together so firmly. Moreover, the developments go on at an incredible speed, and there’s a proper catharsis at the end. Also, all the characters that show up in it have rich facial expressions.

——To begin with, the fact that the three main characters are homeless is a twist.

Jin: In the first place, it starts with the main heroine spitting onto people in the streets from a rooftop (laughs). I really like those sharp-edged points of it too. “Tokyo Godfathers” has a content that can be written even if the protagonists were parent and child from an ordinary household. But through making the protagonists homeless, it became extremely vivid.

——It’s as if it turns them into down-to-earth characters and gives you a sensation that they connect with the audience’s “present”.

Jin: If I were to speak of other words by Director Kon Satoshi, I also think that “Paprika” and “Sennen Joyuu” are amazing. But on the other hand, I end up thinking, “They’re so wonderful”. As in, “Awesome, aren’t they? I don’t get them very well, though” (laughs). But “Tokyo Godfathers” is a candid form of entertainment that even an idiot like me can instantly get hooked on. The fact that I indeed want to keep doing entertainment resides strongly inside me.

——Listening to you talk like this, Jin-san, it makes me think that the books you read and movies you watched because you liked them reflect straightforwardly in your own manner of expressing yourself.

Jin: I myself think that I’m usually straightforward (laughs). Rather than “I want it to be seen like this” or “I want people to think of it like that”, I prioritize “I want to do this” and “this is fun”, so to say. By multiplying “The☆Doraemons” to “Tokyo Godfathers”, it turned into “Kagerou Project” (laughs). I feel like that’s my foundation.

[theroundbartable]

Dragon Island

“Absolutely not.” Sometimes, Arthur Pendragon was not only a prat, he was a downright Clotpole. Not that Merlin ever failed to mention it.

“Arthur, I am going with you!”

“And what exactly can YOU do against dragons, Merlin? This is THE dragon Island! My father has been searching for this place for over a decade! There are rumors that there will be dragon lord's there as well! Do you even know how many knights have died since the purge started? Since my father fought these monsters and erased them from this part of the world? If we find this Island, we can end this war! But this is too dangerous for a servant. I can not waste my time consoling you, when the sea is making you sick, Merlin. I have battle strategies to discuss.”

Merlin huffed and crossed his arms. They were standing at the shore, far far away from Camelot. Uther Pendragon had a ship army remaining here in position. He regularly send out spies to find the home island of the dragon lords. Not that there were any actual dragon lords with dragon lord powers left. They were wiped out in the war. But their families remained. Those who valued their traditions and taught each other magic. But weren't the first son's and therefore had none of the abilities their kind was so proud of. But magic was another reason to have them wiped out.

About a week ago, one of Uther's spies had found a trace that lead them to an underwater cave. Barely shallow enough to have a narrow boat sail through. They had found runes engraved in the walls. And the spy was pretty ecstatic that this MUST be the entrance to the secret island.

Well... Since Arthur was the only knight known to have actually killed a dragon (which he didn't), his father found it absolutely logical to send his only son and heir on another suicide mission. Into unknown terrain, with unknown enemies and not one dragon, but a whole army of those impossible-to-kill-except-you're-a-dragon-lord creatures.

It was truly perfect. Arthur could finally proof his worth as crown prince.... again. And almost die.... again. Heroically of course. Uther was a genius.

And apparently Arthur was just as smart, because the idiot prince had decided to go on that mission WITHOUT Merlin. The only ACTUAL dragon lord left in the entire known universe. Not that they knew about that.

“Just so you know – I do NOT get sea sick. And I already know how to use the sails and stuff. Will and I often went out with the fisher of our town. Other than you who grew up in a fancy Castle with perfect temperature in every single room and hundreds of servants working for you. You may train, but you have NO idea how to deal with the weather, with the tides. You barely know how to dress yourself!”, as Merlin exclaimed the last part, he could basically feel the steam of anger from Arthur's nostrils flaring at him, while a few knights were snickering behind them.

The knights were, by the way, currently occupied readying the boat.

“Fishing on a boat and Sailing on the open sea is totally different.”, Arthur argued, causing Merlin to roll his eyes and facepalm himself. “Fisher's... sail, Sire.”, he muttered, causing Arthur to frown as if that confused him for some reason.

“I don't care. You cannot stop me. I'll come with you.”, Merlin's expression was final.

“I'm the crown prince of Camelot, Merlin. You have to do what I say.”

“I never listen to what you say. Why would I start now?”

In the end, Gwaine and Leon were ordered to drag Merlin away from the boat. All while Arthur ignored the very obvious argument (provided by Merlin and confirmed by at least two other knights), that he NEEDED Merlin. If as a servant or a navigator or maybe a warning radar for obvious danger that Arthur was certain to ignore. He NEEDED him. So, Merlin would definitely find a way.

“Hey, buddy. I gottcha.”, Gwaine winked at him, while Merlin was still trying to make up a perfect strategy, how he could sneak on the ship. Merlin blinked up at him, while Leon just rolled his eyes and pretended not to listen. “What?”, Merlin asked, confused.

“I got a few barrels of water and wine and stuff for the ride. Leon and I have already prepared an empty one for you. You get in and we'll sneak you on.” Merlin had never wanted to hug Gwaine more. “Thank you!!!!”, he beamed at them. “Wait, Leon? You're IN on the plan? You're not going to rat me out to Arthur, are you?”

Gwaine cackled. “It was HIS idea.”

“Huh?”, Merlin looked at the blond knight in confusion.

Leon was still looking away, as if embarrassed by his treason. “If you're not there, Arthur will focus all his attention on US. And I did not sign up for this.”, he was frowning. As if he was already dreading the following days.

“But... how long have I to stay in the barrel? I mean... If I step out too soon, Arthur will insist to turn around.”

“I can survive five days of Arthur being a whirlwind of emotions. You have FIVE days. Gwaine will sneak you out at night. Lancelot has agreed to help. I can distract Arthur, until you're in. Other than that, I was never involved.”, Leon was grimacing the entire time. He seemed exhausted, as if he had already had five different yet similar arguments today and wanted to throttle someone.

“Wow, thank you Leon.”, Merlin looked at him amazed. But Leon's frown only darkened. “Don't thank him.”, Gwaine whispered. “He originally asked, if we could dress you up like him, so he can stay in Camelot and have a vacation until we're back. You may not get sea sick. But HE does.”

“Why.... And he's still allowed on the ship? Wait, why don't we try that? Doesn't sound like a too bad plan. If Leon's sea sick anyway, people would leave him alone to suffer in silence, right?”

Leon sighed with exasperation. “As if that ever stopped Arthur from discussing battle strategies.”, he made a dramatic pause. “If I don't make it -”, Leon made a sound that reminded Merlin of a creaking door. “It was nice knowing you.”

“Don't be so dramatic, Leon.”, Gwaine rolled his eyes. “Honestly, what's with you? Since Uther announced this mission, you've been nothing but a drama queen.”, he scolded. Leon pouted a little. “I'm being realistic if anythikng. If the sea doesn't drown us, we don't freeze to death or a sudden storm destroys our boat, and we don't get horribly lost in that strange cave and starve to death, then we arrive on an island full of dragons who probably hate Arthur for killing the great Dragon. And being the son of a man who ordered the murder of all dragon kind. Not to mention him indirectly causing the death of the last dragon Lord as well. So we either die, or we die. I'm just planning ahead.”

“So dramatic.”, Gwaine mumbled. But Merlin frowned. Leon got a valid point.

“Be positive. What if we meet a bunch of mermaids?”, Gwaine winked at Leon. Leon frowned even further. “Which kind?” “The hot kind, duh.” “Which is?” Gwaine blinked. “Not this again. You're no fun.”

“No, no, Gwaine. Go ahead. Tell me. Which is the hot kind of mermaid? The Siren one's that lure you in with magic voices and then drown you, so they can rape your dead bodies and make more Sirenbaby's; The manatee's that only start to look appealing when you're so starved and Vitamin C deprived that you start hallucinating right before you pass out and die or the classic one's with boobs and a fish tails that make NO SENSE in their anatomy. Which I will be hearing you complain about for days. When all I want is peace and quiet.”, Leon closed his eyes – yet again- dramatically.

Gwaine was about to open his mouth to counter, when Leon added: “Also, we're knights of Camelot and mermaids are magical creatures. It's your job to kill them, regardless of how hot they seem to you.”

With that, Leon had set Gwaine's brain check mate and left him and Merlin standing there with their mouths comically wide open. Half in shock, half with laughter and amazement. “Holy shit, I think he's finally lost it.”, Gwaine laughed as he watched Leon slump down at the next tree and saying goodbye to the dry unshakable ground.

“Maybe we should ask George to come as well. Or convince Arthur to get him off the ship.”, Merlin muttered. After all, Leon was always a lot calmer when George was around. Maybe because George didn't bully him, did what he was told and was also a good person to be quiet with. George also seemed to prefer Leon as the one ordering him around, because Leon wasn't chatting endlessly. He was precise in his orders and didn't talk around the bush. They got along well. Because they didn't have to get along at all. They had the ultimate work-efficient dynamic. It was horrifying.

“Are you kidding? This will be hilarious.”, Gwaine grinned.

“Don't you think Leon deserves a break?”, Merlin asked, still startled by Leon's obvious irritation. “From work? Yes. From me? NEVER!”, Gwaine winked again. And Merlin already pitied the poor knight.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leon was indeed... sick. The moment the ships left the haven, Leon was slumped over the reeling and holding on for his life. He was suspiciously green in the face and tried to avoid Arthur. Who was continuously ignoring Leon's condition and decided to ask him for how many days they had planned to be on sea. How many weapons they had and discussed whether or not they were actually suitable to kill dragons. And if there was enough food and water and so on and so forth.

He did not realize that the barrel Gwaine had decided to sit on had a few holes in it, that should not be there, were wine in it. Gwaine was chatting with Lancelot and occasionally Merlin, albeit in third person like... “I wonder what Merlin would think of this.”, and then get a hushed answer from underneath him.

The sea was relatively calm for the first three days. And Elyan, who was assigned to steer the ship, had no trouble finding the right path. Arthur seemed content too and left Leon alone on day two.

Leon was hardly eating. And if he ever did, he puked it out ten minutes later. By the third day, he was leaning against the reeling once again. Eyes closed with an obvious headache and ready to drink poison to free him from his misery.

Merlin was still sitting inside the barrel. Except for at night, when Lancelot would let him out, while Gwaine annoyed the prince. It worked surprisingly well. Yet, Merlin was a bit worried. Not necessarily to be found out. That was kind of part of the plan. No... By the way Arthur behaved.

The first two days, it was hardly noticeable. Arthur had focused on talking to Leon. Or Elyan or Gwaine and Lancelot. But after they had run out of conversational topic, Arthur had started to isolate himself. Merlin could see him through the holes of his hiding place. He was often standing at the reeling and staring out towards the horizon. He was eerily quiet. And appeared to be melancholic. If not slightly sad.

“Hey, Merlin.”, Lancelot whispered at an afternoon on day four. Merlin was still shocked that his disguise had apparently worked well so far. Then again, Arthur was terrifyingly oblivious to most of his secrets. “Can't you like... use magic to heal Leon's sickness?”

Of course. If anyone had it bad these days it was Sir Leon. Gwaine was currently occupied with drinking. Otherwise Lancelot would not have dared mention Merlin's illegal existence to him. “Do you think that's wise? What if they all notice? After all, Leon has been sick for three days now. If he was suddenly fine, wouldn't they ask?”

“And you think they'd explain it with magic? Merlin. Leon could have just gotten used to the sea. I'm sure no one will notice.”

“Are you sure?”, Merlin asked back and tried to focus on Leon's pitiful form. “I'm positive. Even if they think it's magic, they don't even know you're here. And what sorcerer would just appear on this ship, just to heal Leon?” “Good point.”

Merlin took a shuddering breath, as he strained himself to look through the barrel once again. Leon had his eyes closed and he was breathing harshly. Arthur was standing right next to him. Deep in thought. As if on cue, he suddenly straightened up, pushed himself from the reeling and went under deck.

Merlin nodded to himself. And then whispered a silent spell in Leon's reaction. There was a flash of gold for barely a second. But in that moment, Leon opened his eyes and looked at Merlin. Merlin froze. They locked eyes. Merlin caught his breath. “Lancelot. I think he saw.”, Merlin muttered, panic was slowly sinking in, along with the realization of the situation. Lancelot frowned. “What?”, he asked. “Lance, I think he knows.” “Merlin, stop mumbling. I'm certain you're imagining things.”

Leon's eyes flickered shut for a second and he took a deep breath. Then he held his head in slight irritation, before looking in Merlin's direction again. He ….. sighed in relieve. Slowly, he pushed himself up. Still holding his head, as he took a deep breath. He nodded at Merlin. Like he was... thanking him? Was Merlin really imagining this? But Leon smiled, stretched himself and rubbed at the dark circles under his sleepless eyes. As if to say: “finally.”

Soon enough, he was gone as well. Merlin opened his mouth to say something, but shook his head to himself, while Lancelot had a firm hand on his barrel.

---------------------------------------

It was night, when Merlin was finally let out of his barrel. The knights were asleep. All but the one on watch. Which was Gwaine, fortunately. Meaning, Merlin could safely leave the barrel, chat with him and eat in peace. He had slept through the day mostly. He trusted that Lancelot and Gwaine would stop anyone from opening this particular barrel during the day.

And if anyone got to close, he could always hear one of them say, this was the “victory wine.” Like this was the finest wine of them all and reserved for the day they managed to defeat the dragon lords. It was a good excuse. Albeit difficult to maintain, because nobody believed Gwaine could hold himself back from wine for that long.

Either way, for now it was fine. Merlin's legs were dangling off the watch tower, while Gwaine leaned against the rod behind him. The sails were up, because the wind was in their favor.

It was then, that suddenly, someone crawled up from under deck.

Even in the dim moonlight, Merlin could make out the shine of Arthur's armor. Everyone had already told him, wearing armor on a boat was absolutely insane. If he ever fell off the boat, he'd drown immediately. Because the weight would just drag him down. But the clotpole was too stubborn to listen. And right now it was as useful as a warning signal to them. 'Why is he up?', was all Merlin could think, as he nearly shrieked through Gwaine's mindless chatter and hid underneath a blanket that lay around behind them. Gwaine, surprised at his reaction, finally noticed the prince as well and waved at him, while Arthur gave him a startled expression. Merlin could have kicked Gwaine for drawing Arthur's attention to them.

“Gwaine? What are you doing?”

Gwaine rose both his eyebrows in amusement. “Oh, I'm on watch. You know. Talking to myself. Looking at the stars. Nice weather out, don't you think?”, he laughed suspiciously.

Arthur frowned and sighed, before climbing up the ladder with a sigh. He shook his head, as if used to these antics and hardly caring for them at all. Merlin hurried to shuffle behind Gwaine, so that Arthur wouldn't notice him. And Gwaine did his best to position himself in a way that Merlin was mostly covered by his frame. In a practiced manner, Merlin steeled his heart and his breathing and went completely still. A method he had accustomed to during his time out in the barrel.

By the time Arthur got up to them, Merlin might as well have vanished. That's how invisible he was. Though, to himself, he felt extremely obvious.

“So, er... Sire. Can't sleep?”, Gwaine asked. It was pretty late. Too late to still be up. Too early to have woken up again. Gwaine pat the ground beside him, so Arthur could sit down. It would be suspicious if he send him away. But Merlin was certain Gwaine did it to taunt him. “Not really.”, Arthur said and yawned. If Merlin could see through the blanket, he would see that the circles under Arthur's eyes were nearly as dark as Leon's had been.

His voice didn't really leave room for conversation. He sounded tired, as if he really didn't want to talk. And despite Gwaine's usual annoyance, he didn't press the matter. He hummed instead. For one, because it was Gwaine. Who would he be, if he wasn't drinking ale and doing noisy things all the time? However, this also served the purpose of covering up all unintentional noises Merlin could have made in the dead silence of the still night. It was too still. But they weren't used to the ever changing weather of the sea. Else, they would have been alarmed.

“It's funny.”, Arthur said after a moment of hummed silence. “What is, Sire?” “I would have thought Merlin would have sneaked on to the ship and come out by now.”

Gwaine laughed comically. Startled by the sudden comment. Arthur ignored him, but Merlin nearly smacked Gwaine for that obvious reaction.

“Well. That surely sounds like Merlin. But we would have found him in no time.”, Gwaine assured him.

“Yeah I know. Still.”, Arthur sighed and shook his head, before running a hand through his face. “I mean... Now that he's not here, I can't stop thinking that I basically left him alone with my father. You know my father. If Merlin doesn't behave, the king will certainly have him flogged. Or worse. I mean... he has these moments when he accuses random people to be sorcerers. What if I left him to one of those antics? Did I make a mistake leaving him home?”

Arthur sounded worried and he was suddenly found playing with his own hands.

Gwaine opened his mouth in surprise. “Huh?”, he asked. “I thought you didn't want him to come? ”

Arthur rolled his eyes. “He's still saver with my father than he is raiding a dragon infested island with us, isn't he?” That was.... an actual question. Not a rhetoric one, like one would expect. No. Arthur was seriously asking. His tone was probably supposed to be rhetoric, but he sounded too emotional. Too concerned. Too guilty.

Gwaine's mouth dropped open. Merlin's heart stilled. “Since when are you so worried about Merlin?”, Gwaine asked and sat up straight. After all... Arthur had never really shown his emotional side to Gwaine. Not like this. Not verbally. There would be lots of teasing, surely. Later on, of course. And Arthur should know that. But Arthur was sleep deprived and concerned and he needed to vent. That may not be wise. But since when do people do reasonable things?

“I'm not worried.”, Arthur denied immediately. Gwaine raised an eyebrow. Which Arthur noticed. “Look -”, Arthur started. “I couldn't take Merlin with us on this trip. Merlin is a servant and he's always unarmed-”

“That never stopped you from taking him on hunts.”, Gwaine raised both eyebrows now.

Arthur groaned. “That's different. We're knights. We can protect him from bandits. Dragon's are.... a whole different story. I faced one and I passed out and I still don't know HOW we survived. I know I killed it, but it was incredibly close. And this mission... I'm not sure we'll make it.”, Arthur let his head sink.

Gwaine paused for a moment. “Wait... you think we'll all die?”, he asked, eyes wide and suddenly terrified. “Of course not.”, Arthur said absently. But it was clearly a lie. “Jesus. You're in a good mood.”, Gwaine mumbled to himself. For the first time, he sounded worried too.

“So... you left Merlin in Camelot because -”

“I don't want him to die.”, Arthur confessed. Albeit reluctantly. “But … you said you thought he'd be here?”, Gwaine pointed out. Arthur breathed. Then he turned to look at Gwaine. “Is it selfish to wish he had ignored my orders?”

Gwaine blinked. “Huh?” To be fair, he had wanted to tease Arthur about the fact that nothing Arthur just said opposed the idea that he was – indeed – worried about Merlin in any way. But that last comment confused him and changed the focus of this conversation.

“I don't want him to die with us. But -”, Arthur bit his lip. “If I die, I'd rather die at his side. Is that weird?”

Gwaine glanced at the blanket, where Merlin strained his ears to hear every word Arthur was saying. Merlin's breathing was getting rigid. This conversation.... was unusual. Very... unusual for Arthur.

Gwaine blinked, then he forced himself to grin and make a more joyous expression. As he always did. Because positive energy was his thing. “Now now, princess.”, he put an arm around Arthur shoulder, which Arthur let him do with a disapproving frown. “Sounds like someone here got a small crush on our dear Merlin.”

Merlin fought the urge to kick him yet again, worried that this would reveal him from underneath the blanket. Gwaine was clearly overdoing it. He was clearly out to annoy Arthur. Merlin knew that. And he really wanted Gwaine to stop. This was humiliating and mean.

Arthur stared at Gwaine. At the laughing face. The poking and joking and attempt at humiliating him expression. But Arthur's stare didn't waver. And Gwaine's expression lost itself on the realization that he actually hit a mark.

“Wait – seriously?”, he asked and pulled his arm back. Merlin behind him froze. Merlin's inner turmoil was at Gwaine's antics. He had been so focused on cursing Gwaine, that he was completely startled by that sentence. He had not expected for Arthur to just.... not deny it. Which was basically a confession. Merlin's eyes widened. And he stared at the blindness in front of him. Once again, he was completely still. 'Huh?', he thought.

“You think it's weird.”, Arthur turned away, still fumbling with his hands. And had the little snide remark from Gwaine not been, maybe they could have pretended this sentence didn't mean so much. That this was simply about hoping his friend was here. That they just continued their conversation from before, without the additional information that Arthur – indeed – liked Merlin more than he ought to.

“I- what? No!”, Gwaine was quick to retaliate. “Of course not. I'm just surprised, is all. I mean... it's Merlin.”

“And?”, Arthur was frowning. As if ready to defend his friend. Which in itself was news to Merlin. Since when did Arthur defend him behind his back? Either way, this was Merlin they were talking about. And it was Gwaine he was talking about him with. There was no need to get defensive. “I didn't think you'd admit it! Especially to me.” The 'everyone loves Merlin, so of course I'm not surprised' was left unsaid. Needless to say. It was only Merlin who didn't recognize that implication.

Arthur let his shoulders slump. “Yeah well. If we're dying anyway, even you teasing me and telling everyone can't make it worse.”

“First of all. Rude. You underestimate me, Sire. You have no idea what I'm capable of. Second of all. Why are you all so dramatic these days? First Leon, now you? We haven't even arrived at the island yet and you're all planning our funerals! Who is to say we even find the island? Or the dragons?”, Gwaine flailed his arms, before putting a soft hand on Arthur's tense shoulders. His tone turned soft. Very unlike Gwaine. But it was not the first time he had worn that expression. He'd acted like this before. Tender and soft and fond. Mostly for Merlin, because Merlin was his first and therefore best friend. And he worried about him too. “And last, but not least. You'll see Merlin again, Sire. And even if he found out, he wouldn't tease you for this. Merlin has a good heart.”

Arthur looked up. Surprised by the comforting tone of Gwaine's voice. After all, Gwaine was not exactly the go to type, when it came down to emotions.

People often underestimate the clown friend. Radiating joy and fun doesn't always come from ignorance and obliviousness. It doesn't always mean they are secretly depressed either. Often, these kind of people have gone through much more than they let on. Often, they have learned to deal with their own emotions and come to the conclusion that having fun, being truly blissful brightens not only the world of others. It brightens their own as well. That doesn't make them less empathetic. It doesn't make them less understanding. Quite the contrary. They have a deep understanding of such situations and decided not to take it seriously. Because not everything has to be. And sometimes it's smarter not to think about stuff too deeply.

“You think?” Arthur's own voice was strangely hopeful. Like knowing he'd see Merlin again was all that mattered. Like the other comfort about surviving wasn't nearly as helpful. Or dare say, important.

“I'm certain.”, Gwaine grinned knowingly. Arthur smiled in relief at that. There was a pause between them, before Arthur added. “If you ever tell him about this conversation, I'll drown you in the ocean.”

Gwaine laughed at that. “No promises, princess.” Truth is, he could. He could easily promise it. But he wouldn't be Gwaine if he said that. It would be too obvious that he was hiding something as well. Arthur laughed.

“Nuts?”, Gwaine asked, suddenly and held out a can full of salted nuts. Startled by the question, Arthur almost bend over from laughing. “You're unbelievable.”, Arthur shook his head. Suddenly embarrassed that he confessed all this to Gwaine. But he accepted the nuts anyway.

The rest of the night was spend almost quietly. Which wasn't for long and Gwaine did his best to just distract Arthur. Which meant, it was just Gwaine and Arthur chatting about Merlin. It was mostly Gwaine. Because Gwaine's mindless babbling often meant talking positively about Arthur's servant. Arthur was already used to this.

For once though, Arthur was just as deeply into the conversation. “I think, if Merlin was here, he'd feel guilty.”

“Why is that?”, Gwaine asked, encouraging Arthur to continue. He barely concealed his grin, because Merlin was witness to all of this. Unable to move which would lead to exposure.

“Well... the last dragon lord died for him. And now we're visiting the last remains of his culture. Even if they have magic. I can't imagine Merlin be anything but devastated, when he meets them. I suppose the idiot would apologize to them. Like it was in any way his fault! Merlin can be such an idiot sometimes. One would think he wants to die, so often as he drinks poison for others or jumps into mid battle, unarmed. I'm honestly glad he has the decency to hide most of the time, while we handle things. I don't think I'd be able to concentrate on fighting, if he just -”, Arthur exhaled a deep breath and flailed his arms to imply Merlin running into knifes. “He's too brave for his own good.”

“Merlin is the bravest.”

“The bravest man I ever met.”, Arthur agreed and got a chuckled clap on his shoulder for that. “Look at you, Sire. Saying all these nice things about Merlin. Wait till I tell him about it.”

Arthur immediately recoiled. “Seriously, don't.”

“Why? What's so bad about him knowing that you care?”, Gwaine frowned in amusement. Thinking, that Arthur was just shy.

“He knows that I care. I'm pretty damn obvious about it. No need to put any more attention to it.”

Gwaine scoffed in disbelieve. “YOU? Obvious that you CARE? Really? This is what you call obvious?”

“What do you mean?”, Arthur frowned, honestly confused, while Merlin was trying to breathe even slower. Because somehow Arthur had shifted closer to the blanket. A hand was put on it. If Arthur himself made the wrong move, he'd accidentally pull the blanket off of him.

“Arthur. I don't think Merlin even knows you appreciate him at all.”

Arthur was stunned with silence. “You're joking.” Merlin blinked underneath the blanket. Just what on earth was Arthur talking about?

Gwaine stared at him. “Sire... what exactly do you understand about being obvious about this?”

Arthur frowned. “Well... Erm. I'm the prince of Camelot. My father has never allowed me to have friends that are not royal enough to be of knightly status. Merlin is a servant. Yet, he's my best friend.”

Gwaine stared back at him. “Have you told him that?”

Arthur blinked. “No... because my father would ground me, if I ever did. But I have...”, he slowly swayed to the side, searching for the right words. “I treat him like a knight. I take him on hunts where servants are not allowed. I used to punch him, too, like I would a knight, to cheer him up. Though I stopped that, because he said he doesn't like it. And I mean... I stopped. I wouldn't do that for just anyone!

My guards have been ordered to let him into my room, even if I ordered them to let no one in. If I don't want him around, I have to tell them that specially. I er... let him steal my food. He loves blackberries. So do I, but he doesn't need to know that.

He's always insulting me or my father behind his back, but I don't really throw him in the stocks for that. Which I should. That kind of talk is treason. He could be hanged for that, you know?

I give him unnecessary chores, just so he has a reason to hang out with me. And he doesn't get punished, though what he does is a really shabby job. Now that I think about it, I think I mostly pay him for insulting me.

I've defended him in front of my father. I have used my word as knight for him more than once. I have trusted him with my life and drank poison because he told me it was a good idea. Or because the choice was either him or myself. And I trusted him with the antidote or with taking my royal seal back to Camelot to whoever I want to precede me. I have saved his life and protected him in battle...”, at this point, Arthur was counting on his fingers and it looked like he was about to go on for hours.

However, Gwaine looked at him oddly, which made Arthur pause as soon as he noticed. “What?”, he asked, clearly confused with Gwaine's reaction.

“Well... just. I see what you mean.”, Gwaine was talking slowly. Realizing that yes... from Arthur's point of view, all of that was actually extraordinary behavior. But for anyone else... “But you do realize that most of that is just... Look. The things you describe...

Half of the stuff happens behind his back, which you don't tell him. So how would he know? Other stuff is like.... Merlin probably thinks he's just stealing your stuff. Defending someone innocent is not something you do for someone you like. It's something you do for strangers, if their life depends on it. It's something Merlin himself would do for anyone.

And... treating him like a person when he argues with you and taking him seriously is hardly an expression of love, Arthur. I know in your position that's different. But to anyone else. Jesus christ, how do I put this?

The only extraordinary thing about all this, is you risking your life for him. Which he would do for you – for anyone really – without even thinking. And YOU would die for your own people too. I hardly think he sees a difference in your behavior towards him and your general behavior to your people.

Merlin would risk his life for anyone. He doesn't even demand thanks for it.

What you do, is... for a prince.... extremely … er... let's say affectionate. But for Merlin, it's... how do I put it … less than the minimum.”

Arthur blinked. Finally Merlin shifted underneath the blanket. His eyes blinking rapidly now. Gwaine was right. This WAS how he saw things. But the way Arthur described the way he acted.... that wasn't just Arthur trying his best to be a good prince or person. This was Arthur trying his hardest to show he cared! Cared for Merlin! Merlin felt... touched? Kind of. The crush thing aside. That was a whole different level of work in process. (1) He felt his own face heat up with the knowledge that these things... These things that Merlin had guessed were normal for Arthur... that Arthur had done them on purpose. That he had actually thought about Merlin to make sure he was cared for. That this was a far as he could push himself and did it despite the risk of being scolded by his father.

Arthur's mouth was open now. Unable to retort or add on to his previous examples. “But -”

“You do know, Merlin still doesn't believe us, when we tell him that you risked your life getting him a flower, because he thinks we're messing with him, right?”

“That's ridiculous. That flower was needed for an antidote! What is there to doubt about it?”, Arthur exclaimed, almost furious. Merlin shuddered in surprise. 'Huh?', he thought to himself, his face flushing hard.

“Yeah. I know. He does not.”, Gwaine nodded eagerly.

“But... I thought I was so obvious? I mean... Even my father noticed! He's told me I was getting too close to Merlin. So I tried to hold back, but... I thought Merlin knew.”, Arthur appeared shocked. Like someone had just turned his entire world upside down.

“The king noticed?”, Gwaine raised both eyebrows in shock.

“Yes, I mean. When I came back with that flower, he threw me in the dungeons for it. He keeps reminding me that I'm not supposed to be friends with Merlin. He keeps offering me new servants! I've turned down five offers last week!”

Gwaine's mouth dropped open. “Woow.”, he made impressed. “If Uther thinks THAT's a lot. What kind of childhood did you have?”

Arthur looked up, surprised. “I dunno? A normal one I guess? I mean. I didn't have a mom and my father was always busy and Morgana and I were fighting all the time, so....”

Gwaine's eyes squished a little. “Have you ever even been hugged?”, he asked with suspicion.

Arthur straightened his back. “I'm.... not supposed to get close to people until I get married.”, he muttered. Gwaine stared and his mouth dropped open again. “I meant Uther. Did you father never hug you?”

“Was he supposed to do that?”

Gwaine's jaw dropped. “And here I always thought you just were a stuck up royal like anyone else. But your father abandoned you. No wonder you have no idea how to deal with emotions.” Arthur flushed and tried to retort, but then he closed his mouth. Embarrassed.

Gwaine hurried to correct himself. “I mean... considering all this, you're doing a lot, actually. You're a good man, Arthur. I wouldn't be your knight, if I didn't think you were worth dying for. Just. God damn it, I'm getting so mad right now. Your father is an asshole. I mean, I already knew that. But holy shit.”

Arthur frowned. “Don't talk about my father like this!”, he growled, but Gwaine stopped him again. “Nope. You don't get to decide that. You're in denial. He abandoned you. He keeps sending you on quests that could get you killed. He didn't even show you that he cares if you come back!”

“He cried when he thought I was dead though!”, Arthur commented, remembering the troll Catrina accident.

Gwaine blinked. “Good to know where he draws the line. What the fuck, Arthur.”

Arthur bit his lips. He felt defensive for his father. But... wasn't it bad... that he couldn't see a single flaw in Gwaine's accusation?

“Merlin is your exact opposite, you know.”, Gwaine suddenly said and slowly patted Arthur's shoulder. This time highly aware of the fact that this was probably the closest contact Arthur allowed for anyone. Apart from the fact that Arthur had a crush on Merlin and Merlin was the guy who dressed him.... Let's not get into that.

“I know.”

“He grew up with a mom who hugged him every day. Arthur, Merlin is the most affectionate person I know. He's extremely emotional and he's not afraid to show it.”

“I know.”, Arthur said again, but this time softer.

“Compared to that your way of dealing with things probably looks more like you're pushing him away.”

Arthur's head sank and his shoulders dropped. He grabbed the blanket tighter. “I know.”, he said yet again. Frustrated this time. 'I'm trying.', he didn't say, but they all knew it.

“You should talk to him.”

“I know.”, Arthur was defeated.

It was quiet between them once again and Arthur stared out on the sea. And from the distance, you could see the first sun rays of the day illuminate the wooden deck of the ship. Arthur stared at it, as long as it was possible to look into the direction. While Gwaine watched him with worry. Gwaine had almost forgotten Merlin was still there. Merlin, who was trying his hardest to appear invisible. And quiet. And still. Nobody could hear his loud heart beat, but Merlin himself. Though he could swear someone had to notice at some point.

“Rise and shine.”, Arthur suddenly said and smiled to himself. For the first time, the conversation went beyond Gwaine's understanding and he could just stare at him in confusion.

But Merlin could hear what Arthur was actually saying. It was the sentence Merlin always woke Arthur up with. In this context, it meant, Arthur was thinking of that. Of early mornings and Merlin in it. The way his smile slowly fell, Merlin could feel that Arthur was actually missing him. And hoping he was here. Unaware that his wish had already come true.

It took Merlin everything he had in himself, to not jump up from underneath the blanket and just hug him to death. Which he now knew would equal a marriage proposal to Arthur. Oh god, all those love potion incidents …. where Arthur hugged and kissed random women. The boy must have had a mental breakdown afterwards. Now that Merlin thought of it, Arthur used to behave really strange after those incidents.

Meaning, he wouldn't talk to anyone. He would excuse himself a lot. Would be anxious around everyone he was forced to talk to. And he'd be especially awkward around Merlin. Merlin's eyes widened once again with a start and it paralyzed him as he realized precisely WHY that had been. He flushed. And he was glad Arthur couldn't see him like this.

“Sire?”, Gwaine finally asked, still uncharacteristically gentle. Arthur shook his head. “Nothing. I'll go back to sleep. Leon should be up soon. I think he's already feeling much better.” Arthur sighed and pushed himself up. He let go of the blanket, making Merlin exhale a deep breath. Then he took the ladder down again.

One last time, he was stopped by Gwaine. “Wait, Arthur.”

Arthur stopped for a moment. “What is it?”, he asked.

“You like Merlin right? As in, you're in love with him.”

Arthur flushed, but he answered with a hesitant “yes.”. Which was like a major blow in Merlin's guts. Because being in love was an entirely different thing than having a crush. And yet, to have this confirmed... Merlin struggled to breathe.

“What will you do, if he doesn't like you back?”

There was a pause. A heavy one. Then Arthur sighed. “Gwaine... It's not like anything can happen between us anyway. Even if Merlin did like me back. I can't tell him. Merlin is the best friend I have. I couldn't bear to loose him. I won't let anything or anyone, not my father, not a potential wife, not even my own feelings get in the way of that. I won't ruin what we have. I couldn't live with myself.” And with that, he disappeared under deck. Leaving Gwaine behind, completely stunned.

Finally, Merlin pulled the blanket off of himself and dramatically breathed the fresh air around him. It had started to get really stuffy under that.

Gwaine turned around, almost startled. As if he had truly forgotten that Merlin had been there. They looked at each other for a moment. Unsure what to say.

--------------------------------------------

The storm hit the boat without any warning. Maybe, if they had known about the “calm before the storm”, they would have noticed that there was – indeed – a warning. But they didn't. Because Uther didn't care that these knights had no idea about sailing. Or rather, most of them. The one's who did know about it, had been asleep, as Arthur had assigned none of them to keep watch.

They were lucky they made it in time to get the sails in. But as soon as the storm was raging, they had to hold on to everything for dear life. They had no time to fixate any of their belongings to the ship. Which meant that now, barrels and bottles and cups and knifes and anything they had lying about, was now thrown around their ears.

Those who had the great misfortune to get knocked out by a barrel, got thrown of the ship. But through all that, you couldn't hear the screams and the shouts. The storm was so loud, it deafened everything that was further than two steps away.

In a strange way, the storm came over them silently. Merlin had never managed to get back into his barrel. But he had shushed Gwaine to bind himself to the watchtower. The entire thing was about to be blown off, was it not for Merlin's magic.

In fact, while Gwaine closed his eyes, praying the storm to be over, Merlin used his magic to keep his friends safe. Albeit, there were too many of them. He couldn't safe everyone. But he DID manage to keep Arthur safe. Who was running around in that blasted armor and shouting orders to his subordinates. He was not lucky to be okay. He was lucky to have Merlin to keep him that way.

That was, until Merlin saw his own barrel being thrown off the ship. And Lancelot saw it. But Lancelot didn't know Merlin wasn't in there. Oh fucking hell no.

Lancelot screamed his name. And he managed to shout so loud, that Arthur turned around, totally confused why one of his knights would shout out the name of his servant in the middle of a storm. But Arthur, foolish, kind, love deprived Arthur, made the connection. And when Lancelot shouted at him to explain that Merlin was supposed to be IN that barrel that was now about to drown on the ocean. Arthur did the most foolish thing a prince could do.

He gave Leon the authority.... and – in a panic- jumped after Merlin.

Who was not in that barrel, but on the watch tower. Who watched and stared and couldn't believe what he saw. Because Arthur had just JUMPED of the ship for him. Fully armed with his sword and knife and wearing armor.

'That fucking idiot.”, Merlin mouthed and now panic washed over him as well. In a moment decision, Merlin yelled at Gwaine to stay where he was. And then he slid down the ladder. Not even bothering to use the steps. His hands already burned from the heat of the fraction. And splinters of the cold wood edged into his skin. But he didn't give a damn.

He ran over the deck, seeing panicked and confused faces everywhere and then he directly jumped after Arthur.

The storm wouldn't stop for another five hours. Thanks to Merlin, the casualties were little to none. But even after the storm had calmed and the sea lay still around them, while the knights tried to catch their breath.... Merlin and Arthur could not be found among the wrecks. And Leon's headache was returning. (1) The sentence: work in process is a mix of work in progress and processing something. I found that creative. It’s intentional :)

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First (you are here) <<Masterlist >> Next

[itsbenedict]

I didn’t post about everything I played this year, so here’s my opinions on the stuff I played that I didn’t make a rec post for:

Raging Loop 

Raging Loop is one of them twisty meta Zero Escape-y branching-path visual novels where an ensemble cast is trapped in a mysterious circumstance where people are dying gruesomely, and you have to find out what’s happening and stop it by looping a bunch. 

I can’t wholeheartedly recommend it, because... it tries to have its cake and eat it too with the supernatural elements. Clearly magic is real and has important impacts on the scenario, but then other parts are trickery you’re supposed to see through, and it’s entirely uninterested in cluing you in to how that trickery was accomplished. Not exactly a fair play mystery, in that regard- you have to kind of just be along for the ride, rather than try to figure it out.

That said, it’s a good ride- pretty strong character writing, and the central conceit of the Werewolf/Mafia-style murder scenario creates really interesting drama. It’s more concerned with making itself feel clever than letting the player feel clever, but it’s still well-paced and gripping and has a pretty decent resolution.

Detective Grimoire

I recommended Tangle Tower, the sequel, pretty strongly- and this one, while obviously a little rougher around the edges with the art and mechanics (the suspicion tracker system is a total dud; I didn’t even realize it existed until I realized I was missing an achievement for using it), it’s still pretty darn good. Really fun character designs and animations, fully-voiced, and a solid whodunit backing it all. Plus- while the two are more or less self-contained, the continuity threads with Tangle Tower raised some really interesting questions.

Contradiction - the all-video murder mystery

This one was pretty fun, largely on the strength of the actors. The main mechanic of interrogating people on evidence and using their own statements against each other was some good stuff, too. Definitely had that Phoenix Wright quality to the deductions, and Jenks is a really fun character. (Had a few points where progression was just linked to standing in a certain previously-abandoned area of the map where a clue was suddenly there for no reason, there- good thing it had a hint system.)

As a mystery, it could use a little work- most of what you end up finding out is sequel bait (for a sequel that never actually came together, unfortunately), and the actual whodunit is just sort of hiding in the cracks of all that. And... cornering the culprit just sort of happens out of nowhere once you’ve got your hands on the right piece of evidence, without much fanfare. You’re following up on leads like usual, you find a little lie in someone’s testimony, and then- oh, shit, they’re just confessing everything! Unlike all the previous times you questioned them and they were super evasive like everyone else! And then the game is over. 

All in all, it’s pretty meaty and entertaining and I’d recommend it, but unfortunately the creators have moved on to other things, so there’s not going to be any follow-up on the stuff it left unresolved.

Ikenfell

Ikenfell is a tightly-designed RPG about kids at a magic school, with Paper Mario-style action command mechanics and a battle system that makes a big deal out of careful positioning and movement, which was really enjoyable. The difficulty’s a little high (I recommend always always always speccing into max damage because killing things before they kill you is worth more than any amount of defense, speed doesn’t work, and healing is cheap), but I found it really satisfying.

There’s... something... off? About... I don’t know how to put it, it’s... doing that “yes, everyone is queer and mentally ill, deal with it” thing, which, sure, okay. But for a lot of them it’s such a background thing, like... half the playable cast is unambiguously nonbinary, but like... I don’t know if it’s trying to make some statement on how there are no rules to being NB and you can 100% perform a particular binary gender presentation but still count, or if they wrote the whole story and then changed the pronouns of some of the characters for Representation Points, or what. Probably the former? I dunno, it just feels weird. Maybe I’m just not woke enough to Get It.

(unrelatedly: why the heck is the official art they use everywhere so... off-model? none of them look like they do in-game- they look like the creator commissioned someone to draw a group shot with one reference image each and didn’t tell them anything about the characters. how much you wanna bet they commissioned a friend and it came out wrong but they were too polite to say “sorry, no, this is wrong, can you do it over?”)

Trails of Cold Steel IV

Hoo boy. It’s... not great, and it’s not great in a pretty predictable way for an even-numbered entry in the Trails series. It happens every time- first there’s a game in a new engine with new characters and a new world to explore, and it’s really nice and does interesting things... and then it ends on a cliffhanger, and then there’s a sequel game in the same engine with the same characters and the same world, reusing as many assets as possible. Also the League Of Generically Evil Anime Supervillains is there causing trouble for reasons they refuse to explain, and the plot is a storm of magicbabble and macguffin-chasing that makes little to no sense. 

Cold Steel IV is that for Cold Steel III, full stop. Welcome back to all the same places you visited last game, except this time there’s some stupid magic apocalypse happening (not that it stops you from taking the time to do random sidequests constantly, of course). The whole “oh, the evil curse mind controls people and that’s why they do stupid bullshit that’s in no one’s interest” plot point is leaned on super hard, and it’s just a big yawn the whole way through.

It’s still really fun, though, because the battle system remains really well-designed. (The same battle system that was just as fun in Cold Steel III, mind you, but it hasn’t gotten old.) And- though they’re struggling to square it with the dumb mind control apocalypse plot, the NPC dialogue continues to make the world feel believable and lived-in. They don’t slack on the parts that make Trails good- it’s just the parts that make Trails bad are making themselves more evident than ever.

did finally get to date Towa though so that’s a win

One Step From Eden

OSFE is... uh. It’s fucking hard is what it is. It’s sort of a deckbuilding roguelike, and there’s this combat that takes place on a grid, and- wait, it’s like Mega Man Battle Network, it’s exactly like Mega Man Battle Network. Man, I forgot about that, but the mechanical influence is extremely obvious. It’s MMBN meets Slay the Spire.

Except it’s super duper hard as hell, because unlike MMBN you can’t pause and swap out chips or anything- everything is just always happening so much, all at once, everywhere, and you have no recourse but to git gud and learn all the enemy patterns and the behavior of your own spells and develop the twitch reflexes necessary to not fucking die from all the shit that’s on the screen always.

(What’s the story? Uhhhh, there was some kind of magic apocalypse, and some anime girls are trying to reach a city for some reason that doesn’t really get explained ever. The game doesn’t really care to build its world at all- it’s all mechanics plus a little token character dialogue that doesn’t say much.)

The point is it’s really frickin’ hard but I am an epic pro gamer and I got ALL THE ACHIEVEMENTS, MOTHERFUCKER. If you’ve played it, I expect you to be really god damn impressed with me, okay???

A Short Hike

This one was really relaxing! It’s a platformer where you explore an Animal Crossing-y island of cartoon animal people, collecting mobility upgrades- but like, mainly it’s about straight chillin’. The flight controls are fun and there’s lots of little secrets to find and it’s just a nice time that doesn’t drag on too long. Not too much to say about this one.

Pokémon Sword

Ehhhhh.

I’m not here for the hot takes about how Dexit is good actually. Development hell happened, they had to make cuts for time, I get it. It’s disappointing and makes the game a little bit worse, but it’s not the end of the world.

Apart from that... perfectly serviceable? The Wild Area could’ve used a little more technical polish (as could most things in the game, really) but was a step in the right direction, giving the player a wider array of early-game team-building options than ever before. No HMs is good. Story and characters were kind of nothing, but that’s par for the course. “At least this time they’re not shoehorning in some kind of stupid evil-team-wants-legendary-pokemon-to-destroy-the-world apocalypse plot”, I thought to myself before they managed to shoehorn one in at the last minute with zero buildup- but, hey, beats wasting half the game on it.

It’s nothing special and it’s missing a lot of polish, but its problems are mainly due to being rushed, and presumably next gen they’ll be able to reuse a lot of the models and animations (maybe even improve the animations so they’re not so boring??? a man can dream) and make something interesting. SwSh seem like they were testing the waters for something else, and not taking too many chances in the meantime. 

(yo why would you sell all these cosmetic items and then turn them all off during gym battles, though) 

Hades

Hades is- oh, who am I kidding? Everyone knows Hades, it’s the game of the year, greatest thing since sliced bread, Supergiant are heroes, yada yada yada. I’ve played almost 300 hours of it and I’ve completed everything except all the Resources Director levels (currently a Sigma Wraith), it’s extremely fun and you don’t need me to tell you that.

Petal Crash

It was that thing the Paranatural creator helped on? It’s, uh. It’s a block-sliding puzzle game thing, sort of in a Puyo Puyo vein. It has fun character designs and some good dialogue, like you’d expect from Zack’s involvement, but it didn’t really leave an impression otherwise (besides how got dang infuriating some of its Turn Trial puzzles can be.) The story is... kinda heartwarming, kinda didactic, kinda childish, not especially deep or interesting. Hard for it to be, when it’s told through little bits of fluffy character dialogue that exist to set up a puzzle battle as quickly as possible. Not super recommended unless you really really like block-sliding puzzles.

Hollow Knight

Man, why’d I sleep on this for so long? It’s a metroidvania platformer with heavy Dark Souls inspiration, in terms of tone and difficulty and death mechanics and environmental storytelling. And it’s... apart from all that, just really good as a game, with tight controls and juicy movement and great animation. Progression is linked as much to mastery as it is to upgrades collected- I found myself in lategame areas facing down things that would’ve killed me ten times over at the start- not because I had the best gear, but because I’d learned the game’s language and understood how to move in ways that wouldn’t get me killed.

(Usually. Sometimes I’d walk into a room and sit on a bench and suddenly there’d be a boss fight and I’d get slaughtered. Ain’t that just the way it goes?)

Anyway, on top of all that it’s just charming as hell, with a really unique and well-realized world full of little bug people. I love how, like, your character is clearly some kind of eldritch abomination, but it’s small and cute and so everyone (besides enemies that attack you on sight because they’re possessed by some kinda evil mold) is like “awww, who’s this little guy? want some help, little guy?”

(except Zote, who is just an ass hole. i love him.)

[androgynousblackbox]

I saw The Squid Game and here are thoughts (spoilers)

-First of all, maybe is my non korean ass being ignorant, but the shape they use through the entire thing to represent the Squid Game looks absolutely nothing like a squid and that has bothered me the entire time. I was waiting for someone to make sense of it and never happened. Was it just me? I was the only one who cared about the accurate representation of marine creatures through basic shapes? Yes? I am just being nitpicky? Okay.

-I already liked the actor who plays Jang Deok-su because of his role on another korean show, Beyond good and evil, that is an excelent mistery show I totally recommend, where he also plays as some kind of mafia lord that gets into trouble and is a little shit. Also he is hot as fuck, so that helps a lot. He was my personal favourite character right after Ali, a pakistan immigrant that was desperate to provide for his family, because Deok-su was such a fucking asshole that legitimately didn’t give a fuck about anything and that is always fun to see.

-And now that I mentioned him, Ali was too good for this fucking world and he didn’t deserved shit of what happened to him. Even before ever entering the game.

-The premise of this show is basically to contrast against how capitalism screws over people against basic kindness, which is antithesis to capitalism itself, and that i show we get to the final winner of the whole game. Now, there is a space to talk about how these type of stories could come across as kinda simplistic, but it doesn’t feel like the purpose of the show at all is to go out of it’s way to argue so much about this issue as just show the issue, show the consequences and talk about it within the context of a narrative.

-This is why my favourite episode of all has to be the one in which the majority of players decide to go home, after witnessing literal mass murder during the first game, only to realice life still fucking sucks for all of them and that is why they chose to participate on the first place. They still struggle to deal with the shit they did before, they still struggle to find money, even on circunstances in which nobody should have to fight so hard. It talks about a type of system that is so fundamentally broken and fucked up that it would really leave a diabetic elderly woman in pain to walk away to keep working simply because she doesn’t have the means to pay for her necesary treatment or even for her house if she doesn’t do that. -And sure, the reason why this happens is mostly because the protagonist had a gambling addiction that made him to waste all the money they did have, but ultimately he is not responsible for creating such hard conditions in the first place and the show goes out of it’s way to show different ways in which people are screwed over in ways they could have never had any control over, no matter how hard they worked. Some people chose to make their own mistakes and screw other people over, and they got to live with the results of that, but ultimately is all about the money and who has it, who gets it and who doesn’t, not about fairness or justice. So, when a big chunk realice that the outside world is just as hostile and unforgiving as before, they decide to come back because yeah, it’s hell, but at least they have a promise that things could turn better even if the cost is their own lives. Outside of the game they didn’t had not even that.

-I also really like how they contrasted the supposed principle behind the game against the actual structure of such, because at least I read it as a microcosmos representing the outside world as it is. Like of yeah, very fucking equal are people inside of this island where chain of command are still a thing, where they are still fucking pawns on someone’s else game whose rules they didn’t create or chose to, and where the people with the money literally laugh at their death because it’s that insignificant to them. Alright, yeah, keep telling youself that. But that is also the rationale outside, right? “Everyone has a chance to do better, if only you worked harder and keep trying surely you would be fine. Forget that the game was rigged against you from the start and don’t even fucking mind about the literal piles of bodies of nobodies that didn’t won like you did, because they didn’t worked as hard as you did. Don’t think too hard about it. Just keep working and then enjoy that money.” I don’t think you are meant to believe on that shit, but it’s what the Front Man tells himself to keep going. Everyone is equal… but some are more equal than others.

-On that sense it feels very reminiscent of the vibe that gave off Parasyte in it’s treatment of the same issue, so you can definitely enjoy it from that perspective or, if you don’t want to, can simply enjoy it as a entertaining, well made story about human drama and people literally struggling to survive, with some moments that will punch at your fucking heart and make you feel like shit as good stories tend to do.

-It’s a very aesthetically pleasing show, I can tell you that much. It’s not super artsy fartsy with a lot of symbolism going on, or maybe it was but it’s a cultural specific symbolism I didn’t catch on, but it’s still very competently made with a lot of just fucking beautiful shots in which every single frame matters and used with purpose. I don’t remember a single second that I was “why the fuck are you showing me this” because it’s actually what they DON’T show you what ends up mattering.

-Having said that, the show does have it’s twists and turns but they aren’t super difficult to not see coming if you pick up on how the show works. I wasn’t shocked by the ending because I had already seen the hows, they actually help you to come to it by going out of their way to always show you the dead bodies of past characters, so when they don’t actually do that it does stand out and if you pick on that then you can see it coming. So I personally wouldn’t recommend this show on the basis “the twist will surprise you!” because I don’t think that is right mindset to come into it. Come for the story and stay for the characters, that are all well worth it, not for the twists.

-The ending was an obvious cliff hanger for the next season, which I am fine with, but I also liked it because it kept consistent with the main character himself. Like sure, he does see how bullshit the whole game actually is, but it’s also, and this might be just my own interpretation, keeping up with what we have established already with him about having a gambling addiction because he genuelly enjoys the thrill. It’s not about the winning money, because if that were the case then he wouldn’t be immediately giving it away the second he has some, but just the winning and losing only to try again which keeps him going on. Also there is a tiny little implication that the man actually is using his gambling addiction as a consequences of untreated PTSD after watching his friend die during a protest like some form of self medication, since when he is losing or winning at least he is not having flashbacks or thinking how he tried to fight the system before one single time and it was all downhill from there. But that might be just my own intepretation again and not necesarily something they wanted to establish. In any case, that his entire character arc ends up being “he wins all the games for the first time… but at what cost” is still a very satisfactory one, so for him to be the only one to come back to play, hopefully so he can destroy it from within, is really the most interesting ending I could have imagined for him.

-I also really liked how they firmly established a narrative where some people come together through pure generosity (the group that the protagonist made) or through fear/intimidation (the group that Deok-su made). Every member from the first group comes to unite through little acts of kindness and then the protagonist just kept winning because they helped him out one way or another. He didn’t just won because he was the smartest, the most resilient or anything, but because he formed strong enough relationships with everyone to allow him keep advancing, showing another flaw of the game’s logic. See, because you are meant to work all on your own and be a lone wolf in wolf street and eliminate everyone that gets in your way, because that is supposed to be the only way you can “win”. But he doesn’t win like that, he literally just stumbled on with people he was nice to and then they were nice back to him until the end, where he kept betting on people being decent and end up winning the last bet.

-Of course, this winning doesn’tcover still for the great devide that exist between the protagonist and the men who put him through that hell. The comparison of the old man does between what a poor person with no money and a multimillionare have is fucking bullshit that rings hollow, because the poor person would have never have the power to do what they did to anyone and the things the poor person concern themselves with are note ven a thought for the powerful. But it makes sense that he thinks that way when he is literally an observer of the common people from a literal tower, safe by all the medical care that his money could get him. The biggest difference between him and the protagonist is that of looking at the value of human lives, and then their only point of connection is the love of games. The old man was looking at everyone losing their lives but he himself was never in any danger from it, so of course he got to just have a good time fooling everyone and playing around.

-Honestly, the more I think about it, fuck the old man, what a fucking dick.

-Until I see a dead body I won’t believe that the cop is dead, and I hope he isn’t because he and The Front Man have pending a long fucking conversation about what the fuck happened. It’s obvious that the Front Man has fully bought on the nonsense of the system, but the fact he still is pained for what he did to his brother could hint to him having a change of heart somehow that could be very interesting to see if well handled.

-The lady that was briefly with Deok-su was just mean. She and Deok-su made a good couple of two perfectly mesh dickheads, and I was actually kinda sad when they had to go but also thought it was the only appropiate ending for the both of them so, good job on that one.

-The way that the norkorean lady was finished was fucking bullshit though. Like, equal opportunities my cat, how the fuck is fair to make players play after recieving injuries from easily preventable hazzards made AFTER already beating a game? It would be like the doll detecting someone that someone still had a finger on the other side of the line and shooting it anyway even though the rest of the body was out. Like, they literally set that up in a way to hurt someone and they got what they wanted, but if different chunks of glass just perforated the skull of the three of them or something like that? Then there wouldn’t be any game for them to enjoy and no winner either.  All those richy rich richsons would have made their travel all the way there for fucking nothing. Yeah, it’s a very slim possibility but why even risk it like that so close to the finale? Narratively speaking I know why it happened, it makes sense because that allowed for the rest of the story to advance, but in-universe it really doesn’t and it was literally just to take her out of the way quick for the next plot point to take place. That was literally the only death that left me actually unsatisfied because it came out of nowhere, it wasn’t because of anything she did or could have prevented and it was so unceremonious. Like, you could have probably think some way for her to reach the same place without making so obvious you are pushing her there.

-She did looked very good on that suit, though. I wonder if the reason they gave her a suit and not a dress was because they never imagined that a woman could ever reach that far in the competition, because somehow I doubt they were specifically pushing for breaking gender norms. During a lot of the games everyone talks about how having women in your team is a disadvantage because strenght and “makes you look weak”, so I guess it makes sense that the people behind the game also had the same rationale and never even fucking bothered to get something new for her even when she turned out as a finalist. It would also explain why there is not a single employee on the entire island who is a woman, or at least none of the ones whose faces we actually get to see. Which I guess could work as another subtle evidence that despite all the posturing, there was never a “equal opportunity for all” sentiment behind any of it. The women were there literally assumed to be destined to fail from the very start. I hope that if that was the intention we get to explore a little bit of that on the next season.

-I have already seen some opinions about the show, so I might be alone on this one, but I appreciated the character of Sangwoo for what he was and how, despite all the bullshit he pulls, he is not all that evil like Deok-su and the mean lady. He genuelly helped Ali at the start without expecting anything in return because Ali helped the protagonist first, not even because he was the one getting the benefit himself, but he was also the man who turned himself into a criminal because he got greedy and wanted even more than the money he had. Like yeah, he was a selfish piece of shit, but he was allowed human moments and kept it interesting until the end. Also the actor was hot so that didn’t hurt.

-In conclusion: Ali was too good for this world.

If you enjoyed this sorta review, rambling or whatever this is about the show, and want to see more, consider supporting me through Ko-fi.

[funkymbtifiction]

How I Write, How I Dream: ESTP Edition

Mod: An ESTP asked permission to submit this, since she noticed I do not have an ESTP ‘How I write stories’ description in the archive to match this series. What follows is in her own words.

ESTP: How I Write, How I Dream

So this submission is like 6+ years late topically, I think, but it’s an understatement to say I get side-tracked easily. First I had to be self-aware enough to actually determine my type with confidence, and then I had to remember to write this up. Hopefully it’s an edition that’s better late than never – in any case, I thought it might be fun to contribute, given the frequent lack of Se-dom voices in things like this.

I’m aware that I might be in a comparatively small group as a regular ESTP writer, let alone one familiar with personality typology, but I wrote my first short story at nine for a 4th grade assignment, and then my first full story/intended book when I was eleven, (both of which I immediately proceeded to act out on the playground), so it’s sort of always been a part of my normal retinue of hobbies/coping mechanisms/diversions/distractions. Usually I find that I write the most when I’m bored or otherwise dissatisfied with my real life – sort of using it to spice things up with more exciting events, even if they’re regrettably fictional. I also suspect that I use writing to experience all the interesting things I find myself unable to physically do, at least for the moment – not unlike what your ISTP contributor described. I think sometimes that I use it to subconsciously work through certain concepts, too, until I understand them holistically. It’s like it gives me a way to actually engage and interact with a philosophical concept through tangible expression – through embedding it into [fictional] human behavior. Like how I understand the nuances of the concept of apostasy better for having walked through the plot of Silence (2016) with Scorsese than I would have if it was still just a definition in a theology textbook. Application helps me. (I also had a counselor a while back who told me that I used my writing to work through the emotions I hate to process in real life, but I was never wholly convinced of that or the connection of my plots to my real life events, so jury’s out, I guess.)

When I was a kid, I liked to read a fair-ish amount. Spies were oftentimes my favorite topic, but I also wanted eagerly to be one and owned probably every kid spy gadget ever manufactured for sale at the Spy Museum in D.C., to which I dragged my parents practically every weekend so I could crawl through air vents, etc. However, my favorite children’s series of all was actually the Ingo series by the late Helen Dunmore, which provided me with exciting, nature-based, and [mostly] emotionally satisfying adventures in my lifelong favorite unpredictable environment – underwater. (I also dragged my parents constantly to our local aquarium.) As I got older, the frequency of my reading dropped, and I now find myself usually pulled more towards nonfiction.

[Note – I just realized a lifelong quirk with me and books. I’m sort of ridiculously set on *seeing* the books I own. I mean, I know what I own, but I still constantly get out every book I own on a particular topic just to see them all at once. It makes the knowledge more cohesive for me to concentrate it visually, I guess. Even just the covers. Anyway.]

My writing habits are kind of awful – in that, like alluded to above, I pretty much only write when I either a) am seized by a great idea, or else b) have nothing better to do. I have little ambition to actually publish or anything like that, regardless of encouragement, and I prefer to think of my writing as just a diversion, an amusement for myself alone (though I do crave minimal approval, as I do in anything). In any case, as soon as the pressure of a schedule is attached to my writing, it drains of all joy for me. Much like your ISTP contributor described, I think I hover somewhere between plotter and pantser, depending on the story. Too much planning leads to my feeling like I have no incentive to actually write it, as I’ve already experienced it, and too little leaves me spinning aimlessly with no real direction. I write both prose and screenplays, and the rule seems to hold true for both, overall. Also, whenever I have a problem in my plotting or characters or whatever, I find that I have to step away, go be busy with something else, sometimes for a long while, and when I come back everything just falls into place. I guess unconscious Ti and/or Ni finding solutions? I’m not totally sure how/why that happens.

As my inclusion of screenplay format may suggest, I experience my stories in an incredibly visual way. I think sometimes that my narratives come across very much like movies, with all the requisite limitations and usual lack of character introspection. I feel like I pretty much focus on the observable actions of my characters – I find describing any kind of extended rumination highly unnatural, at least most of the time. Even my planning is highly visual. I have a tendency to graph, chart, draw, and plaster my options all over the walls. It’s ridiculous sometimes, but in many cases I just have to be able to see them all next to each other, even if there’s no other information provided. Like my books, mentioned earlier. It helps clarify my plot choices in my mind. It’s also a quirk/weakness of mine that I am often entirely dependent on outside images for descriptions. I need to find a real person, place, or thing to base my fictional ones on physically if I hope to have any kind of concrete knowledge to allow description. Again, it helps solidify them/it in my mind.

I have another weakness in my writing that often results in much incredulous laughter – I’m often entirely blind to any hidden meaning or symbolism in my own writing. I might get the vaguest sense of something being a good line, but be unsure why until my ISFJ friend starts praising my deep, archetypal references and crafting – and then staring at me when I clearly have no idea what she means. It’s happened several times by this point, and though it makes me laugh, I’ll just blame it on the subconscious inferior Ni. I pretty much never have any kind of goal of being symbolic or laden with deep meaning. If I were ever to try that, I think it would massively stress me out.

In terms of editors, beta readers, or whatever else we want to call those who give solicited criticism – that’s just what I need/want. Criticism. For the most part, I’m incredibly thick-skinned about my writing and would be absolutely fine if someone told me that it was utterly terrible and the whole thing needed revising down to the very concept. That may be because I think many of my concepts are lackluster to start with. But nothing frustrates me so quickly as readers unwilling to actually [and harshly] criticize. I always tell them that I want him/her to rip it to shreds. I mean, that’s the only way it’ll get better. (I’ve made mistakes before by assuming that other writers feel this way, too – my sister did not appreciate my input.)

I write almost exclusively dramas these days, I guess, though of varying subtypes. (I also maintain the availability/ready accessibility of about 10+ stories at any given time of active writing. I bounce between them sometimes based on what I’m feeling like at the moment or what I have a new thought about.) I have a sort of historical drama thing that takes place in the 1680s, a modern drama prompted by a premise of genetic engineering, a Most Dangerous Game kind of hunting/weapons thing, a detective story in the immediate aftermath of WWII, a classic deserted island story, a thing involving the phenomenon of stigmata… the list goes on and shifts constantly.

However, while I’ve typically enjoyed writing, here’s the omnipresent rub – engaging with it for any great amount of time makes me really unhealthy emotionally. I’m pretty sure that after like two or three days primarily working on a story without other overriding priorities, or like six or seven with those scattered distractions, (at best), I’m plummeting straight down to my inferior functions. My historical stories do this even more quickly, because they oftentimes seem to require more mental effort. I get super irritable, drown in self-loathing, start to think that everything real that I want is never going to happen – it’s really not good. The fact of the matter is that while writing is a fun diversion oftentimes, I go insane doing it for too long, because I need to get out and engage. (Thanks to my pesky Se-dom, daring to ask for more than just incessant fidgeting.)

When I do write, however, I’m known for my in-depth research, my character-driven plots, lines some people in my life seem to think are witty or something, and emotional depth, believe it or not. I’ve been complimented on it, as well as my tendency to accurately portray mental/emotional illness. I don’t know. I’ve never thought I was overly talented at such things, but then again, I never paid much attention. Even this write-up has been hard – analyzing my writing like this. It’s not a strength of mine to scrutinize my own habits.

After all, I’m busy – I have to go blast Maroon 5 as I jump off a 20-foot wall yelling, “Parkour!”

I am an ESTP, remember? ;-)

[mountphoenixrp]

We have a new citizen in Mount Phoenix:

                Rafaela Lee Garcia, who is known by no other name,                               a 26 year old daughter of Huracan.           She is an investor and the director of Mount Phoenix Bank.

FC NAME/GROUP:  Kang Seulgi / Red Velvet CHARACTER NAME: Rafaela Lee García AGE/DATE OF BIRTH:  November 8th, 1994 PLACE OF BIRTH: Tampa, Florida, the USA OCCUPATION: business investor, Director of Mount Phoenix Bank (MPB) HEIGHT: 162cm DEFINING FEATURES:

a well-proportioned figure, broad shoulder; hooded, upturned eyes that tend to completely close when she smiles; full cheeks; round chin

a faint scar on the inner side of her left wrist

PERSONALITY: Rafaela will never be satisfied with being inferior. Authoritative, charismatic, shrewd, calculating, and somewhat manipulative, she’s living to follow her own dreams and ambitions. Her hard-earned grit and self-esteem turn her into a disciplined and dignified individual. Being prudent with strong leadership, she takes herself and her doings very seriously.  She’s more than willing to work hard and give everything she’s got for the sake of success, yet at the same time showing respect to people, the law, and work ethic.

While looking stern and composed most of the time, Rafaela still sees herself as fun-loving and approachable. Her whimsicality and sense of humour may surprise others, whereas her intense desire for privacy can perplex even those who are close to her. She prefers to mind her own business and have fun with people she cares for at times, and what she wants from others is respect and not attention. In short, people can try to pay tribute or validation to her, but they shouldn’t expect true gratitude or appreciation from her in return.

Far beyond that calm and powerful facade is a great deal of anxiety and confusion. Rafaela knows well that she’s here to strive for success and status since that seems to be the only way to keep her going. Until now, when she’s done with self-pitying and blaming the world for her weaknesses, she’s still struggling to find what makes her genuinely happy. While she’s got rather healthy self esteem but a quite serious trust issue, and she still needs to learn the true meaning of self-love and, to a further extent, love for other people.

HISTORY: TW: mention of mental disorder, self-harm, sexual harassment, abortion

Rafaela’s birth coincided with the formation of the Gordon, a devastating hurricane, in the southwestern Caribbean. Her mother always included that fact in the explanation, convincing exclusively to her, for Rafaela’s thunderous vagitus and later, her forcefulness.

Being a middle child and the only daughter of a Spanish-American hotel-resort group owner and his young Korean wife, little Cordelia received too much yet too little attention from the world. Intense sibling rivalry, constant peer pressure, and lack of life purpose were the major theme of Rafaela’s life growing up among the brilliant García boys. As a kid, she didn’t mind that at all. The bright side of being the only girl in the family was still enjoyable, as long as she kept being good enough to maintain a decent amount of attention on her existence.

Unfortunately, innocence could never last long. The early adolescent years mercilessly knocked out Rafaela’s sunny core, pushing her right down the bottomless hole of depression. They said she was just another rich kid dealing with trivial struggles typical of her age, and she also believed it. Hence, she did what a teenager in her inexplicable quarter-life crisis would do. Each decision made came out worse than the last, confirming the label that had been unfairly - or fairly? - sealed on her. Spoiled brat, attention whore, brainless rebel, drama queen. Ironically, she had never been or felt like a queen, definitely not at home, and only in her wishful thinking at school. Top education and affluent background didn’t make the kids any nicer, and with her stubborn quietness, Rafaela effortlessly turned herself into an outcast.

One day, at the tender sixteen, when the love letter she wrote to her classmate, a sweet girl with an angelic face, was read aloud in the middle of the school cafeteria at lunchtime, Rafaela revenged herself with a razor. Today, that stupid decision still makes her laugh.

Her poorly planned revenge obviously didn’t work out well, but at least, she was pulled out of that high-end school and instead trapped in their house’s four walls, with CCTVs, a butler, and tutors. She also got a personal chauffeur whose main duty was taking her to and from the office of a prestigious psychologist in town. Six months after her first therapy session, Rafaela was taken to the hospital to take a growing life out of her, while that psychologist was sent to jail for child sexual abuse.

In the next few years, nothing really looked up, except for a really interesting self-discovery. One particular morning, when Rafaela had to walk past that damn psychology office, a tidal of wrath suddenly rose in her chest. Right at her curse, a bold of lightning stroke down from the clear blue sky, setting fire to the whole property.

It would have been only a bizarre coincidence if the same incident hadn’t happened again, then again, whenever she verbalized her wish for destruction. Cool, she thought, since those accusatory fingers pointed at her for being a freak was actually not at all far from the truth. Contrary to popular belief,  Rafaela’s supernatural power discovery fueled her confidence rather than deflating her, as she knew that at least, she felt weird in her own skin for a good reason. Being totally aware of the destruction the power could cause, she started to practice methods to control her tempers, and inner peace and a truce with herself followed as side effects.

Soon, the college era came. It almost magically put an end to that long gloomy winter of her life, for suddenly, she was free to do whatever she wanted, including what she had never thought that she would want to do. Unlike everyone’s, including her own belief that she would never be interested in banking and finance, Rafaela turned out to be one of the best with money among her siblings and half-siblings. With the family’s prosperous assets and what a master degree in finance had taught her, Rafaela made her way to the seat of financial manager of the García’s hotel chains. She also had been venturing into the stock market since her college years, not without some memorable mistakes, but Rafaela’s earned much more than just money from it.

However, it wasn’t all that she wanted. Disliking working under her father’s power and her brothers’ influences, Rafaela constantly sought a way to be completely independent of her family. Finally, on a stormy day, that opportunity came in the form of a mysterious stranger. They gave her the instruction to an equally mysterious island, namely Mount Phoenix, where she was promised not only the independence she had been longing for, but also the truth of who she was. That decently triggered her curiosity, enough for her to actually give it a try.

It turned out that Mount Phoenix really exists, and living in it are real deities and their half-human descendants. And she, not really surprisingly, is one of them.

PANTHEON: Mayan CHILD OF: Huracan (Mayan god of rain, storm, and lightning) POWERS:

Lightning Manipulation: She can generate and manipulate bolts of lightning, and other electronics to some extent. Besides her purposeful use, lightning can also strike the subject of her anger when she curses at it.

Rain manipulation: She can generate and manipulate rain in different forms, including drizzles, light showers, downpours, and monsoons. The scale and duration of the rain will depend heavily on her physical and mental strength at the time she uses the power.

Storm Manipulation: She can generate and manipulate a few types of storms, including rainstorms, hail, thunderstorms, and cyclones. Currently, she can create and control small storms within a small area for approximately fifteen minutes. Using this power demands lots of physical and mental strength.

STRENGTHS:

Despite her rather cold and intimidating look, she likes to socialize and knows how to have fun.

She’s a creative problem solver who loves dealing with good challenges, and to some extent, puzzles and crosswords.  

She’s an astute businesswoman with a no-bullshit attitude and the true grit of a survivor

She’s a walking lie detector, so please don’t try to fool around unless you really know how to

WEAKNESSES:

Her stubbornness’ level: 3000 (and counting)

She’s calculating and manipulative at times, especially when it comes to the real business

She requires lots of privacy and alone time. Nothing will upset her faster than being disturbed in her resting time, and sometimes that means real lightning will strike

While she’s approachable and friendly, it’s actually challenging to get to know the true her, for she’s a well-trained sceptic with six-foot walls built around her core self.

[gstqaobc]

CBC THE ROYAL FASCINATOR

Friday, April 09, 2021

Hello, royal watchers and all those intrigued by what’s going on inside the House of Windsor. This is your biweekly dose of royal news and analysis. Reading this online? Sign up here to get this delivered to your inbox.

Janet DavisonRoyal Expert

Prince Philip’s life of duty

(Adrian Dennis/Getty Images)

For so many years, Prince Philip was at Queen Elizabeth’s side — or walking just behind — deeply devoted in his duty as consort to the woman who is now the longest-reigning monarch in British history.

But the Duke of Edinburgh, who died this morning aged 99 at Windsor Castle, was seen by many as having his own role in helping an institution steeped in tradition try to find its way toward the future.

Much of that began nearly 70 years ago, after the former sailor who gave up a successful naval career saw his wife ascend the throne.

“What Prince Philip did was help modernize the monarchy in the 1950s,” Michael Jackson, president of the Institute for the Study of the Crown in Canada, said in an interview this morning.

“It was still a very tradition-bound institution…. We can credit Prince Philip, with the Queen’s full support, of course, with modernizing [its] finances, protocols, how Buckingham Palace was run … its outreach to the Commonwealth.”

Philip pushed to have Elizabeth’s coronation televised in 1953, an idea she did not wholeheartedly welcome at first.

“He was the modern person,” John Fraser, author of The Secret of the Crown: Canada’s Affair with Royalty, said in an interview this morning. “He was in touch with real people, non-royal people, and so he always had the instinct to reach out. He understood both the dark side of the media presence as well as the necessity of it.”

Fraser credits Philip’s profoundly unsettled early years, after he was “born in poverty and insecurity,” with how he looked toward the future of the Royal Family, and the monarchy.

“I do think those early years were the single biggest factor in his life and how he approached life,” said Fraser. “I think he never assumed things would last forever because he didn’t make any assumptions like that, and I think he certainly assumed the monarchy wouldn’t survive if it didn’t reach out more to the constituency that it had to serve.”

Fraser met Philip, and recalled him as a man who would revel in asking questions and challenging others.

“He was — charming is not the word I would use — but he was an invigorating person to speak to.”

Jackson, who was Saskatchewan’s chief of protocol from 1980 until 2005, met Philip during four visits to the province — three with the Queen and one on his own — and remembered a man with “a great sense of humour.”

“Sometimes people found him a bit abrasive, a bit abrupt, but that’s the way he was,” said Jackson.

“He was a straight shooter and he complemented the Queen beautifully because the Queen is a very soft-spoken, more laid-back person. Prince Philip really spoke his mind and occasionally made jokes and … put everyone at ease. I found him very refreshing, good to work with.”

With Philip’s death, there is an inevitable sadness for the Queen, and inevitable concern for how she will cope with the passing of her husband of more than 73 years.

Both Fraser and Jackson say the Queen will carry on, with Jackson noting “That’s the way she is. She’s a very strong person” with a deep religious faith that will sustain her.

“She’ll do her duty,” said Fraser. “And I think that’s the big lesson of him. He did his duty.”

For a full obituary of Prince Philip, click here.

For photos from Prince Philip's royal career, click here.

Family dysfunction

When Philip Mountbatten married Princess Elizabeth in 1947, the family he was joining was in marked contrast to the fractured one he had known in his youth. His parents' marriage broke down and offered him nothing like the nuclear family arrangement (mom, dad and two kids) that Elizabeth had known throughout her childhood. "In marrying the Queen, [Philip] gained that sort of stable home life that he didn't have when he was younger," royal author and historian Carolyn Harris has said in an interview. Philip's parents were Prince Andrew of Greece and Princess Alice of Battenberg, a great-granddaughter of Queen Victoria. Philip was born a prince of both Greece and Denmark on June 10, 1921, on the dining room table at Mon Repos, a villa that was the summer home for the Greek royals on the island of Corfu. He was the last of five children — his four older siblings were all girls. At the time, he was sixth in line to the Greek throne. But life in Greece didn't last long. His father, a professional soldier, was exiled from Greece in 1922 as his uncle, King Constantine I, was forced to abdicate. Philip's family fled, with the story being that Philip was nestled into an orange box as the family was evacuated from Greece on a Royal Navy ship. They eventually made their way to Paris. Philip's childhood took a "dysfunctional turn," author Sally Bedell Smith wrote in her book, Elizabeth The Queen, when he was sent by his parents at the age of eight to England for boarding school. The family eventually broke down. Philip's mother, who was born deaf, was ill periodically, diagnosed with schizophrenia and spent time in a sanitarium in Switzerland. His father went off with his mistress to Monte Carlo, where he died in 1944. Philip was left to be brought up in the U.K. by his mother's family, shuffled among various relatives and boarding schools throughout his youth. He didn't see or have any word from his mother between the summer of 1932 and the spring of 1937. "It's simply what happened," Philip said matter-of-factly in an excerpt from a book by Philip Eade, Young Prince Philip, Turbulent Early Years, published in the Telegraph. "The family broke up. My mother was ill, my sisters were married, my father was in the south of France. I just had to get on with it. You do. One does." As life went on, there really was no father to guide, consult or do anything else a father can do for his child. Several other close relatives died in his early years, including his favourite sister, Cecile, and her family in a plane crash in 1937. The following year, the 2nd Marquess of Milford Haven, his uncle and guardian, died of bone cancer. That left the marquess's younger brother, Louis Mountbatten, to bring up Philip. His family ties also extended into Germany. Three of his sisters were married to German princes involved in the Nazi party. Cecile and her husband, Don, had just joined the Nazi party before they died. Those family alliances had a visible repercussion when Philip and Elizabeth were married in 1947. "His sisters were not invited to the wedding as they were married to German princes who had been involved in the Nazi party during World War Two," Harris said. Philip's mother, Princess Alice, however, was at the wedding, and in her later years, came to live at Buckingham Palace. Alice had her own moment in the cultural conscience in 2019, as an episode during the third season of the Netflix drama, The Crown, focused on her. "She's just the most extraordinary character," Crown creator Peter Morgan told Vanity Fair. She set up charities for Greek refugees and later established a nursing order of Greek Orthodox nuns. During the Second World War, while her son was serving with the Royal Navy and her German sons-in-law fought for the Nazis, she was hiding Jews in Athens. As much as there was the distance between Philip and his mother in his younger years, there was a closeness later. Alice came to live at Buckingham Palace in 1967. Alice died at the palace in 1969 and was interred in the royal crypt at Windsor Castle. In 1988, her remains were transferred, as she had wished, to the church of St. Mary Magdalene in east Jerusalem. In a 1994 visit to the Yad Vashem Holocaust memorial in Jerusalem, Philip planted a tree in his mother's honour and visited her gravesite. "I suspect that it never occurred to her that her action was in any way special," Philip said during his visit. "She was a person with deep religious faith and she would have considered it to be a totally human action to fellow human beings in distress."

No stranger to Canada

(Frank Gunn/The Canadian Press)

Prince Philip's last visit to Canada was a short one in 2013 — on his own, without the Queen — to present a ceremonial flag to the Royal Canadian Regiment's 3rd Battalion. It came as something of a surprise. Philip had experienced a few health scares in the 18 months prior. So overseas travel was not necessarily a given for the Duke of Edinburgh at the time. But given Philip's feisty personality, dedication to his role and some of the interests he showed over the years, his return to Canada — he made more than 70 visits or stopovers between 1950 and 2013 — may not really have been a complete surprise. The 2013 trip was billed as a private working visit and was only a few days long. But while he was here, he was finally able to pick up the insignias he had been awarded as companion of the Order of Canada and commander of the Order of Military Merit from David Johnston, then Canada's governor general.

To read more about Philip’s time in Canada, click here.

Royally quotable

“He is someone who doesn't take easily to compliments but he has, quite simply, been my strength and stay all these years, and I, and his whole family, and this and many other countries, owe him a debt greater than he would ever claim, or we shall ever know.”

— Queen Elizabeth, publicly acknowledging Prince Philip’s importance to her during a speech on the occasion of their 50th wedding anniversary in 1997.

To read more on what Philip meant to the Queen, click here.

Remembering Prince Philip

Royal Fascinator readers are welcome to share their thoughts on the passing of Prince Philip, and any memories they may have of meeting him over the years. We’ll include some in the next edition of the newsletter.

I’m always happy to hear from you. Send your ideas, comments, feedback and notes to

royalfascinator@cbc.ca

. Problems with the newsletter? Please let me know about any typos, errors or glitches.

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦🇬🇧🇦🇺🇳🇿

[scarpool-gmk]

10

Title: Godly Marine: Killed Author: Scarpool Fandom(s): NCIS, Percy Jackson & the Olympians Pairing(s): Gen Rating: PG/K+ Summary: Chapter 10 (12/13) — Staff Sergeant Michael Kahale, Marine Corps Mechanic and Son of Athena, was murdered. Annabeth Chase is determined to find out who did it and why. She, along with Percy Jackson, Grover Underwood, and Clarisse La Rue, infiltrate NCIS where they team up with NCIS Agents Leroy Gibbs, Anthony DiNozzo, Timothy McGee, and Ziva David. Complete Genre: Fanfiction, Mystery, Drama, Humour, General, Action Warnings:  N/A

Annabeth sighed. "It was Michael's father, wasn't it?"

Gibbs's masseter muscles flexed. "Impersonating a federal agent is a criminal offense."

Well, she already knew the answer to her question anyway. "I know that."

"Is that all you've got to say, Chase?"

"I won't apologize if that's what you're searching for."

Gibbs jabbed a finger at her. "You lied to me! In my house!"

"Did you expect me not to? What did you want from me?"

"The truth. Honesty. Trust."

"I couldn't take that risk."

"You took that risk the moment you came into my investigation, meddling with my team."

Was this guy for real? "I had more than myself to worry about, Agent Gibbs. I had my mission, my friends, and Michael."

"Your mission? Something other than Kahale?"

"He called me because something was wrong. 'Help them,' he told me. That was my mission. Find out who needed protection and from what."

"His family," Gibbs concluded, "And you entrusted me with them, what he told you to protect."

"Justice still needs to be carried out, and by leaving it to you, I know it will be dealt with professionally and impersonally."

Gibbs took a second. "You trust me in that."

Annabeth nodded. "Yes."

Gibbs peered at her. "How'd you know?"

"About Mr. Kahale? He would have told me the truth."

"That simple, huh?"

"He knew who we were, there was little excuse. And when I figured out his family was what Michael was talking about, I knew they had to be involved."

"He's family."

Annabeth looked up in surprise.

"Greek gods have a pretty messy family tree," Gibbs said. "You were his family. The one on his god side."

Annabeth breathed out an airy laugh. He was a smart one. "He was my brother. We shared the same mother."

"Athena."

Annabeth considered him. It wasn't a question. He knew. Gibbs was definitely not to be underestimated.

"Did some research on the myths. It's part of the job when a case revolves around it, especially when they turn out to be real."

Well, that wasn't vague at all.

He was probably making assumptions again. Annabeth narrowed her eyes. Or was there something more?

"I couldn't turn my back on him. I know you understand that."

"You don't know anything about me!"

"We both know that's not true." Annabeth pointed to herself. "Child of Athena, remember. If there's one thing we're good at, it's analysis. This is your team, but it's also your family. I've been to your house- your living space says a lot- and I did my own research, Gibbs. On you. Family isn't just important to you; everything you do has your family at its core. Your rules probably don't have anything on family. Family is why you do what you do, so there's no need for rules about them. It's your drive. Your center."

Gibbs said nothing. Annabeth huffed. 'That's right. If you get to use your vague assumptions, I can one-up with deduction.'

"You do what you have to for family," Gibbs said. "You and Michael were close?"

Annabeth noted the softness that permeated his voice. "Not in particular."

"He held your contact close to him. He told you that he was heading to Peru."

"You're assuming that-"

"It's part of the fake name you created. Hell yeah, I can assume! No such thing as coincidence. You knew the ship's next dock. He must have told you; he trusted you. Out of everyone, he chose you to help. There is obviously some sort of network for you. The evidence has been working with me for two days. Maybe that's how you met, maybe not, but he has to have more connections. He decided to bring you into this, not someone older."

"I am older!"

Gibbs's eyes flashed, questioning.

"The world isn't the safest. Demigods attract monsters. They sense us. They come to challenge us. There is a safe haven, and we either make our way there or get killed off."

She turned to look at the rest of the two teams staring wide-eyed at them. She met Percy's green eyes and held it for a moment, before turning back to Gibbs.

"Look. I had a job to do, a mission to finish, and family to take care of."

"That you did."

"We understand each other, then?"

"Yeah, guess we're good." Gibbs smirked. "Agent."

Annabeth almost sighed with relief.

"And if anything happens." Annabeth straightened. This was Gibbs. Of course, he wasn't done. "If you hear anything…"

"We'll handle it. But," Annabeth added as Gibbs's entire body stiffened, "I'll keep in touch."

She saw a vein on his temple twitch in annoyance, but he stayed silent— stubborn Navy cop.

"So," Grover fidgeted under everyone's stare. "What now?"

"It's time for you to go home," Gibbs said firmly.

Annabeth saw Ziva playing around with one of her other celestial bronze knives. Ziva tried grabbing the blade, but it continued to faze through her. She shook her head and extended it to Percy. "Thank you for lending us these."

Percy looked at them. "Keep them. You never know when you might need them again."

Annabeth smiled at him. "Even though those aren't for his to give, Seaweed Brain is right. You should have them. You were able to see through the mist and should have something that actually works against monsters."

Gibbs tilted his head in acknowledgement.

"I guess this is where we part ways," Annabeth said, feeling exhausted all of a sudden, the adrenaline's and ambrosia's effects wearing off.

"Hey," Gibbs said. "This will be the last time I catch you impersonating federal officers." Annabeth smirked. Old people are so demanding. "And try not to land in any more newspapers, especially you, Jackson."

This time, Annabeth let out a laugh.

Percy squawked. "What! Just because- those times- it wasn't my fault!"

Annabeth suddenly remembered something.

"Gibbs! One more thing. Michael's body…"

Gibbs nodded in understanding. "That strawberry farm any valid?"

"You won't be able to enter." Although, Annabeth was sure he probably assumed that anyway. Probably thought he wouldn't be able to find it, either.

Gibbs grinned.

"I'll call you."

-Κλαρίς-

Clarisse watched the greyed Jarhead, and his three teammates walk away. Faithful. Loyal. Proud. That man had her respect from the beginning. He was a man trained for more than combat. It took courage to break the rules, independence to do so with solid reasoning, and leadership to have his teammates follow not because of fear but because of trust. Leroy Jethro Gibbs is a great Agent, a great Marine, a great man.

Clarisse was proud to know and say she had worked and fought alongside Agent Gibbs. Although she had to be purely honest.

"I will never step foot in an office again!"

-Αντώνης-

"Are you really going to keep this quiet, Boss?" Tony clicked his seat belt in. "I mean, this is pretty big."

Gibbs shrugged. That was a yes, then.

"I don't want any of you to lie for me," Gibbs told them. "Your reports are your own. It's your own decision."

"Well, I don't think putting down that I fought against snake ladies and such will go down very good with Vance. Not to mention how a supposed NCIS Agent is part donkey."

"Goat."

Tony snapped his head to McGee. "What?"

"He's a satyr," McGee said. "He's part goat, not donkey."

Tony was prepared to make a snide remark but held back when he took a proper look at his younger partner.

"You look a bit pale there, Tim. You alright?"

Tony's concern grew when McGee looked at him with a terrifyingly vacant expression. "He was part goat, Tony." He waved his hand in front of his chest. "Half human. Half goat."

Oh, boy. "Yeah, I get that. You should drink some water. Lie down."

Ziva gave him a threatening look. "Not on me. It is hot, and we are covered in dirt. Wait till we get back, McGee."

"He might not make it," Tony warned.

"He is perfectly capable of-"

"Do you think there are elves?"

Ziva spluttered to a stop, looking incredulous in McGee's direction.

"You know. Like, do they have other magical weapons? Gems and potions and..."

Ziva felt his face. "Oh, McGee, you are burning up. No! Don't fall asleep! McGee!"

"We gotta get back to base, Boss."

Gibbs nodded, and Tony groaned at his words.

"Back to work."

-Γκρόβερ-

Grover frowned. "Is telling him our address a good idea?"

"He already had it," Percy pointed out. It was a good point, too. It was already in their system.

"Can't we use the mist and the laptop to make them forget about us? Chiron is not going to like-"

"It will be fine, Grover," Annabeth said, halfway leaning on Percy. "I trust Gibbs."

Gibbs… That man was something else.

Grover had felt so anxious! He didn't think he could have been in Annabeth's position. Gibbs had such control over his stare. Even though he wasn't the one under it, Grover had felt the cold steel gaze he pinned Annabeth with.

All that disappeared when he felt a weight across his shoulders. Percy had wrapped his arms around Grover and Annabeth. Squishing them together. Clarisse grumbled as Annabeth held an arm out to her, but let herself be pulled in any way.

And it felt right. The four of them waddling awkwardly away. Grover felt Percy's happiness practically envelope their link.

"I'm totally gone," Annabeth said with a laugh. "I hope whoever's in the backseat doesn't mind me laying on them."

They almost fell as Percy jostled in the middle. "I don't mind!"

Grover laughed. Being with friends always felt right.

"Let's go home."

-Λεον-

The door swished open. "You called, Leon?"

Leon looked up from. 'Leon.' The Long Island team was really gone, then.

"Some disgruntled scholars are calling us cheats, Gibbs. Accusing NCIS of hiding intricate historical artifacts vital to their field."

"'Vital,'" Gibbs chuckled. "I didn't realize dealing with annoyed university professors was in the Director's job description."

"It's not. I was just made aware of the situation and went to ask Ms. Scuito about it. Now, accuse me of being curious if the knife they were all after was gone. Part of another investigation. One that I am unaware of. I go visit the good doctor downstairs, and Kahale's body has already left the building."

"Things move fast around here, Leon."

Leon felt his teeth grind together. "The chair is big, not slow."

"We solved the case, Leon."

"You did, collaborating with Long Island. Speaking of which, where are they?"

Gibbs handed him the case file. "Kahale had a run-in with the Reynosa Cartel. They went back up to follow leads on their end."

Huh, so the Reynosa Cartel is involved.

"What about on our end?"

Gibbs shrugged. "Their case. It's all in the report."

Gibbs gave another team his evidence? His body? His case?

Leon felt a bit bad for those academics. They would never see the knife nor Scuito's findings.

"So, they're fighting Reynosa alone? I don't remember giving that directive. Seems inefficient."

Gibbs raised his brow. "You are Director, Leon. You can assign tasks as you like."

Leon made a face. "Not that team. Can you believe I didn't even know there was a small NCIS department in Long Island? Apparently, something in the works by SECNAV. He's all secretive about it."

Gibbs shrugged. "It's the top dogs, Leon. They're always secretive."

Leon glared at him. Something about the way Gibbs spoke made a small part of Leon nag at him, but he couldn't put his finger on it.

"We should start digging into the Reynosas. It's bad enough that they've infested our neighbor's lawn. We don't want the same in our own backyard. I want this wrapped up, Gibbs, and I expect you to lead me through every step."

"Of course."

The nag got stronger.

"I trust you put as much detail in the report about what happened."

"Of course."

Leon's grip on the file tightened. He felt like he was being played, which means he probably was. He had read enough of Gibbs's and his team's reports to recognize garbage. He was sure that's what he would find. He hadn't even opened the thing, but he could already smell the stench. Leon should take Gibbs's badge, break up his team, file a report. Do all the things he swore he would do when he took the chair. But he couldn't. Not yet. With SECNAV also waving his secrets around, Leon had to be patient about this. Had to be smart.

"And you found out about all the Greek stuff?"

"It was a part of his life. He and his family lived like these stories existed. Had to fight them to survive." He carried a bit of a faraway look on his face. "We finished it for him."

Gibbs missed the skeptical look Leon threw his way "What were you fighting?"

Gibbs snapped back to reality. Replacing the lost-in-thoughts look with a mischievous one. "Hellhounds, harpies, a hydra." Gibbs grinned. "I took out a Cyclops!"

Leon ground his molars, wanting to punch that smug look off his face. Trying to be Mr. Funny, huh? 'It doesn't suit you, Gibbs.'

"Really?" Leon said. "And what happened to all of them?"

Gibbs mimed an explosion with his hands.

"Poof!"

-Περσεύς-

Michael's shroud was a silken sheet designed as the flag of the United States of America. The cords tying the body were embroidered with grey owl tassels. It was beautiful and patriotic, but it had turned to ash long ago. The fire burned low, surviving on the remaining cinders. Most of the campers had left. Only a few stragglers remained.

Clarisse stood by the forest, staring moodily at the smoke rising into the clouds.

Grover sat far from the fire, whispering with Juniper.

Annabeth sat nearest. Percy couldn't figure out the face she was wearing. Troubled, perhaps? The bonfire was a neutral grey. Lost in thought then.

He sidled up next to her. "It's over. Mission complete."

"I know. It's just…"

He gave her a smile, hoping it wasn't as awkward as it felt. "You are overthinking about what's going to happen next. I know you. You're going through every detail of what happened."

"It's just- It's so odd to see a network between mortals and monsters. I can't shake the feeling like I'm missing something."

He nudged her side. "You're overthinking it."

Annabeth rolled her eyes at him and leaned over. "I'm compensating for your lack of thinking."

"Hey!" Percy pushed her but put no force behind it. He was glad she wasn't frowning anymore. "Seriously, though, I'm sure you've thought about it enough. If anything does happen, it's nothing we can't deal with, and we'll get through it together. I promise, Wise Girl."

Her eyes sparkled from the fire's light. "Thanks, Seaweed Brain."

Like magic, the fire burned brighter, turning a colourful shade of pink.

Previous Chapter Chapter List Next Chapter

[crazycoke-addict]

The analysis of Chris McLean

Chris McLean is a fictional character from a tv series called total drama which is a reality tv that is parodied off of ‘survivor’. Chris is the host of the show who comes with the ideas of the challenges the contestants have to face in order get to the million. His challenges are shown to be very hard, challenging, with a little to even survival. The very first challenge back in season 1 ‘Total drama island’, the campers had to dive in shark infested water but making sure they land in a small water. He makes them through gruesome challenges in every season which shows not only he’s a sadist but also a psychopath who lacks any empathy towards the people around him. I’ve been rewatching the show, I understand why he does these things in the first place and why he decided to target teenagers instead.

Before Chris became a host, he did a lot of Internet and tv shows before that. In season 3 episode 5 “broadway baby”, Sierra is embarrassing Chris by listing out the things he had done like doing a cooking show, was in a band called ‘Fametown’ and even made embarrassing cat videos. These things that Sierra mentioned is very out of character to the Chris all know. These things are completely different to the chaos of total drama. It also shows that Chris is obsessed with fame and fortune. Because everything did was a failure, Chris knew he had to be smart. When total drama island was first aired it was in 2007. The early 2000s, reality tv shows were becoming more popular like keeping up with the kardashians, the simple life, American’s next top model, the amazing race and yes, survivor. Chris was probably analysing and realised that reality shows are success and decided to create total drama but in his own way. When the campers first arrived, it turns out that Chris posted fake photos to act like they were staying at resort which manipulate the teenagers by making them audition and if they got pick had to sign a contract. This is a reality show, but it’s a reality show with no scripts at all. He also seems to be obsessed with ratings so as the seasons goes on, the challenges become more extreme. He makes the challenges difficult to because in his words, “to make it more interesting”. In total drama world tour, he decided to bring in two new contestants Alejando and Sierra to spice things up and made them sing because singing reality shows are huge and the worst the singing, the higher ratings.

He also seems intelligent to who wants on the show and even wants back as well. When total drama island was first aired the campers had to audition in order to get in so he analyse every audition to find his 22 campers. In Heather’s audition tape, she said that he chooses her, she would give him more ratings but also said that girl are insecure to go on tv but says it’s because she more prettier than them, Chris chose her to be the villain of show and have more drama with the other campers, in Duncan’s audition tape he’s in the middle of escaping so Chris decided that he needed a delinquent in his show that causes chaos for the other campers. Chris chooses the characters who seem that have a stereotype in them.

Ezekiel- the homeschooler

Heather- the mean girl

Lindsay- the dumb blonde

Noah- the Sarcastic know it all

Duncan- the juvenile delinquent

Gwen- the goth

Owen- the overactive cheerful guy

Bridgette- the surfer chick

Geoff- the Party dude

DJ- the mama’s Boy

Eva- the female athlete with anger issues

Cody- the dork who thinks he’s the ladies man

Harold- the geek

Katie and sadie- the BFFs

Leshawna- the loud and proud

Beth- the wannabe

Izzy- the crazy one

Courtney- the bossy one

Tyler- the jock who is bad at sports

Trent- the cool guy who plays the guitar

Justin- the model

Chris chooses people that he knows would be worthy and get more ratings in the show and even brings back the ones who would give more ratings and drama which is why he brings back, contestants like Courtney and Heather who are competitive and only care about the prize. When he decided to bring in new contestants for season 4, I think he chooses mike to exploit him and to see what he’s hiding. In mike’s audition tape, mike reveals that he doesn’t care what his doctor but is embarrassed that he says that. Chris chooses mike because he wants to know what is mike hiding and exploits it.

In the first season, the campers are 16 years old so their teenagers. Chris decided to choose teenagers because teenagers takes more risks and are competitive, they easy to manipulate by bribing them. If one of the contestants don’t participate in the challenges or refuse to back on a season, Chris tells them they have a choice that they can go back on the show to have a chance to win the million or become losers instead. He gives them choices that they don’t really have a choice on. When old contestants reach to their adult age, he knew that he needed new teenagers that he could manipulate and torture.

Chris is a Narcissistic person who loves himself and chooses to spend all the money that was for the season instead he spends it on for himself. In total drama world tour, when they go to Jamaica and have ran out of gas for the plane, Chef is upset with Chris when doesn’t take the blame and said he blew off all the money for ‘Chris land’. Chris suffers from narcissistic personality which is most commonly affect by men. The symptoms are:

- having a exaggerated sense of self-importance

- Have a sense of entitlement and require constant, excessive admiration

- Expect to be recognised as superior even without achievement that warrant it

- Exaggerate achievements and talents

- Be preoccupied with fantasies about success, power, brilliance or the perfect mate

- Believe they are superior and can only associate with equally special people

- Monopolise conversations and belittle or look down on people they perceive as inferior

- Expect special favors and unquestioning compliance with their expectations

- Take advantage of others to get what they want

- Have an inability or unwillingness to recognise the needs and feelings of others

- Be envious of others and believe others envy them

- Behave in an arrogant or haughty manner, coming across as conceited, boastful and pretentious

- Insist on having the best of everything- for instance, the best car or office

When you read the symptoms and look at the character, Chris McLean as a whole, majority fits him very with actions on the show. He doesn’t show any empathy towards the other contestants whenever they do the challenges, in some parts he seen laughing at their pain. Like I said before, Chris is obsessed with fame meaning he has an obsession towards success. He deserves to have the best at anything he buys when Duncan blows up his “cottage”, he has to live at the spa hotel but is complaining because he feels like he’s living like a peasant. Which shows that Chris needs to the superior one more than the other contestants, he has to be on top of the pyramid. Chris rarely lets his emotions gets the best of him and in the majority of the times, he is smiling when he feels embarrassed or a one of contestant are being nosey, chris let’s his emotions get the best of him and goes through his outbursts. Which is similar to how a narcissist feels when they are given criticism.

Chris McLean is a Narcissistic psychopath who is well aware of his surroundings and very intelligent when it comes to his own show.

[solavillain]

Pas de Deux Ch 5: Stranded

+pairing: Spinel x fem!Reader +genre: Drama, romance, angst, slow burn, enemies to friends to lovers +warnings: None (for now) +word count: 6.7K +Chapter 5 / ? previous || next

Read on AO3!

You’ve lost track of how long the injector has been flying across the open ocean. The sun has been up for a while now, so you’d guess it’s close to midday. Spinel has relaxed her grip on you, thankfully, leaving your mouth uncovered, though it’s not like you have anything to say to her. She’s also unwound most of her arm from your mid-section, leaving you mostly free save for a couple wraps to keep your arms pinned.

Spinel has barely moved, only occasionally blowing on her horn to adjust course. You suspect she has no idea where she’s going, or if she even has an endgame for taking you in the first place. Once the Crystal Gems get Garnet’s memories back and deal with the bio poison, you’re confident they’ll be able to track you rather quickly. At least, you’re hoping. Pearl didn’t even know what the injector was, so you’re not sure how she or Peridot would be able to track it from so far away, and the warp system only takes them to very specific locations...

Maybe you’re less confident than you thought.

You sigh and shift a little, feeling the scorching heat of the sun bearing down on you. You don’t want to be the one to break the silence, but you’re hoping she’s going to land you somewhere soon. You’re starting to need water, and you’ll need food eventually as well.

“Try not to think about it, Y/n,” you coach yourself, “it’ll just make it worse...”

So you settle for leaning back on the top of the injector, and try to relax. Spinel flinches at your movement; you can feel her hold tighten briefly. Well, you are laying on her arm now, you suppose.  

“Whatever. It’s not like she can be any more uncomfortable than I am right now.”

As the minutes pass, and the sun continues to warm you up, you feel yourself drifting in and out of sleep...

x * x * x * x * x

The feeling of movement around your waist jostles you from your rest. You jolt upright, turning to look back at Spinel, who blushes and turns her head after removing her arm from you.

“Just needed my arm back,” she mumbles, avoiding your gaze. “Besides. I think I found somewhere to...land. And we’re gonna need to ditch the injector somewhere.”

You roll your eyes and look back out towards the sea. There’s a small island up ahead; that must be where Spinel means to land. As you loom closer to the landmass, a sense of dread washes over you. You’re really going to be stuck on a random island out at sea...with a Gem who knows nothing about the needs of humans.  

“Um,” Spinel starts, clearing her throat before continuing, “I’m gonna...drop you off on the island and then fly the injector somewhere. Got it?”  

Her tone changes drastically with those last words, from timid to jeering. She narrows her eyes at you, almost tauntingly. It’s as if she wants you to fight back, like she was taunting Steven with earlier.

But you weren’t going to give her the satisfaction.

“Yeah, whatever. Just don’t kill me in the landing,” you say sarcastically. You can barely bring yourself to look at her for long. The betrayal of taking you, of trying to hurt your friends after all you’d been through today...it had been one thing for her to attack the Earth when she was lashing out from anger and hurt, but it was another thing entirely for her to do...this. Regardless of your hopes for her friendship before, you couldn’t see yourself forgiving her after all this.

Spinel lands the injector on the edge of the island’s beach, and moves towards your position on the edge of the ship.

“I’m gonna have to lower you down, Y/n,” she says quietly, still avoiding your gaze when she’s close to you.

“Fine,” you reply stiffly. “Just make it quick.”

She complies wordlessly, wrapping her arms around you and lowering you to the ground. She lifts the injector off without another word, and you’re left to fend for yourself momentarily. You decide to get right to it, knowing that you’re going to need protection from the elements, and most importantly a clean source of water.  

You wander into the small forest that sits in the center of the island.  

“At least it’s not a complete desert island,” you think to yourself, grateful for the treetop cover. Shade will be nice- you can feel yourself beginning to burn after the long hours atop the injector. “I’ll also need water, food, fire...”

Suddenly, as you walk towards the forests’ center, a gleeful thought strikes you. It’s a small chance, but what if this island is the island that the Watermelon Steven’s live on? You’ve heard Steven talk about them before, how he’d accidentally created an entire Watermelon People with his healing spit back before he knew how to use the power properly. They had apparently been quite useful in the past, and Steven even had the ability to inhabit their bodies when he was asleep- this could be your way out of here!

You race through the forest, taking note of a couple streams of water that you pass by, but after a few minutes of jogging you reach the other side of the island. You stop to catch your breath, hands on your knees. You can’t help feeling dejected by the apparent lack of Watermelons, but...

“Maybe they’re at one of the other ends of the island?” you think hopefully, and begin to make your way through the forest again, at a slightly slower pace this time. This time you pass a couple small waterfalls, flowing into pools of clear water. You’re grateful that you won’t have to worry about water, at least. Food was another matter entirely. You hadn’t seen any fruit trees or animals on the island, and of course if you did manage to find the Watermelon Stevens, you obviously couldn’t eat them...so what were you going to do?

You shake your head, pushing away the thought. That was something you’d worry about later. You weren’t hungry yet, at least, so that could wait.

Once again you arrive to the end of the forest, back onto the beach. You sigh and slump down into the sand, lying on your back. It looks like this is a totally different island from the one you’ve heard about. Your hope is dwindling quickly that you’ll be able to get back to Beach City...

“What are you doing?”  

A high-pitched voice startles you out of your thoughts, and you bolt upright. You turn to see Spinel standing behind you, arms crossed.

“What the hell does it look like I’m doing, Spinel?” you ask accusatorily, “I’m doing nothing. I’m literally doing nothing because you’ve stranded me on this island for absolutely no reason, and I just ran up and down this place making sure I had what I needed to actually survive. Something I’m sure you didn’t consider.”

She turns her head to gaze out at the sea, once again avoiding your eyes.

“Yeah, well...I guess I didn’t really consider a lot of things recently,” she mumbles.

Your eyes soften at that, your heart hurting once more for the tortured Gem. Some part of you wants to talk to her, really talk to her, but...

“I can’t forgive her. Not for this,” you remind yourself.

You sigh and bring yourself to your feet, brushing off the sand from your clothes.

“Whatever. I have work to do to make sure I live through this.”

With that you turn back towards the forest, trying to remember the (admittedly scarce) survival knowledge you’d picked up here and there. You begin to make your way towards the trees, hoping you can find some branches and leaves big enough to make some sort of shelter.  

“C-can I do anything to help?” a small voice sounds out behind you.

You freeze in place, not wanting to turn to face your captor just yet. The way she sounds...your heart hurts for her, yes, but she doesn’t seem to really grasp just how messed up the situation is that she’s dragged you into.  

Finally you turn to the Gem, who is standing rather awkwardly, unsure what to do with her long limbs.

“I guess...if you want to look for some big leaves, or some sort of bowl-shaped thing that I can store water in, that would be helpful,” you reply.

She nods stiffly and parades off into the forest, looking rather determined. You shake your head and follow her, branching apart to scour for things you may need for whatever shelter you can manage to throw together.  

After about an hour, you’ve managed to gather a few larger palm leaves and some branches. You note that palm trees are scarcer than you would have thought for an island, and you briefly fret about having a receptacle to drink from if Spinel isn’t able to find anything useful.

After assembling them in a pile near one of the waterfalls under some larger trees, you’re fairly wiped. The sun is still beaming overhead, but it’s definitely moved west- you'd guess it was somewhere around three or four in the afternoon. You decide you have enough time to rest a while before you begin trying to assemble a makeshift shelter.  

With a plop, you seat yourself on the large rocks surrounding the waterfall, wiping sweat from your brow. Summer without air conditioning was the worst, especially in a tropical zone. You briefly consider going for a dip in the small pool the waterfall flows into, but you don’t want to dirty possible drinking water any further. So you sit for a while, zoning out and gazing at the landscape of what was to be your new home for the foreseeable future.  

After about twenty minutes, you hear footsteps approaching, and you turn to see Spinel. She’s carrying some leaves similar to those that you found, and a couple concave rocks. You hoist yourself to your feet and move to stand in front of her, wanting to get a closer look at what she’s found.

“I’m not sure if this’ll work exactly, for whatever you need it for, but...here.”

She thrusts the objects at you, then stalks her way over to a tree to lean against it, glaring out into the forest.

You roll your eyes for what feels like the millionth time today- your companion certainly lived up to her moody appearance- and take a closer look at the rocks. They’re just dipped in enough that they could be used for bowls or cups, and you breathe a sigh of relief. Sure, you could have drank from leaves, but that would be wasting valuable shelter resources. You’re relieved Spinel was able to find something, and you place the rocks gingerly near the waterfall so you remember where they are later.

“All right...well, thank you for these,” you say to the Gem, gesturing towards her findings. “They’ll be really helpful.” You pause for a moment and look over your pile of gathered materials, considering whether you want to ask her for help with this. Eventually, you sigh, and relent to the fact that you can’t do this part on your own.

“Could you, uh...maybe help me with building a shelter? Humans...we need to keep warm at night, and be protected from things that are outside and could hurt us,” you explain after seeing her confused face. “So I need to build a little tent out of these so I don’t get sick.”  You try to keep any animosity towards her out of your voice, figuring she won’t want to help if you’re upfront with your current dislike for the Gem.

Spinel nods and pushes herself off the tree, uncrossing her arms and moving towards the pile. “Yeah, sure, whatever. Whaddya need?”

You furrow your brows and tentatively pick up a branch and a leaf, trying to figure out the best way to go about this.

“Um...well if I just position this here...” you mumble to yourself, a flush spreading across your face as you realize you have no idea what the hell you’re doing.

“Uh...I think it’s supposed to be a triangle shape?” you question, more to yourself than anything, since obviously Spinel wouldn’t have any idea either.  

You hear an odd noise, and glance over to the pink Gem. Her face is contorted, and you realize she’s trying to hold in laughter. When your eyes meet, she lets it all out, almost doubling over, and your flush deepens. Though with fondness or embarrassment, you’re not sure.

“Ahh, I’m sorry, Y/n,” Spinel manages to gasp out after a moment, “Y’just... you always seem like you know what’s goin’ on, and seein’ you so unsure was...well, pretty damn hilarious.”

A small smile finds its way to your lips, and you can’t help joining in with a chuckle at your own expense.

“Heh, well, it’s my first time ever trying to build something like this...it’s not every day you get kidnapped to a remote island, right?” you try to joke back with her.

The smile runs away from Spinel's face so quickly, it’s almost like it was never there. Her body tenses and she turns back to the materials pile, picking out a few branches.  

“How d’you want these?” she asks tersely.  

“Shit. Why did I say that? That was the worst joke in the world! It hasn’t even been a day,” you think, before realizing something. “Wait. She’s the one who kidnapped me. Why am I feeling bad for pointing that out? Ugh.”

You bend down next to Spinel, and begin to try out different positionings for the branches and leaves, Spinel helping out here and there with heavier things.

x * x * x * x * x

A couple hours later, you stand back and admire your shabby work on the shelter. You ended up having to make a lean-to in between two larger trees, as you had nothing to tie the branches together for the shelter to stand on its’ own. Spinel helped more than you’d like to admit, and you’re grateful that you at least have somewhere semi-protected to stay tonight.  

Your eyes widen as you realize something- that you’re an idiot.

“I forgot to try to make a fire! Shit!”  

Your outburst startles Spinel, who had been ruminating silently by the waterfall pond. You dash around, looking for small kindling to lay out over larger sticks, and looking for rocks that might spark if you hit them right, as well as stones to encircle the base.

Spinel watches you curiously, not seeming particularly interested in helping out. You chalk this up to her not knowing what to look for, and resolve to ignore her gaze while you busy yourself searching.  

As the sun moves further across the sky, you finally manage to assemble something resembling a camp fire. You’re not sure if the rocks you found are going to work to spark the fire, but you figure you can always try the stick rubbing method as well. You sit down near the fire, which is set up a short distance from your lean-to- close enough that you’ll still be able to feel warmth while inside, but far enough away that it won’t set the thing on fire (you hope.)

You settle in, figuring this may take some time. Spinel shifts uneasily from her spot back by the pond, and you sigh softly, making a gesture for her to come sit by the not quite yet a fire.

You’ve done some thinking today, and you’ve resolved that while you may have lost respect for the Gem, you don’t want to make your life any more miserable than it needs to be while you’re stuck here. You don’t forgive her, per se, but you also don’t want to sit in silence for who knows how long. And knowing what you do about Spinel, she doesn’t want that either.

“C’mon, Spinel...the fire’s not started yet, but you don’t have to sit alone.”

She ducks her head and stands, moving to sit across from you, her knees pulled to her chest and her head resting on them. Her gaze looks far away; she’s staring into the forest, looking forlorn. You knew most Gems didn’t get tired, not in the way humans do, but...she did look exhausted. Today took a toll on her.

You wrack your brain, trying to think of something- anything- to say to Spinel, but you come up short. What conversation topics do you bring up with a kidnapper? Who you thought had become a friend? You shake your head and get back to trying to start the fire. You don’t want to make things awkward again like earlier...

x * x * x * x * x

It feels like you’ve been at this for hours. At one point you gave up on the rocks and switched to the stick method, groaning in frustration every time you thought you saw a spark and it disappeared. Eventually you switched back to the rocks, completely unsure which was truly the best method. Spinel had gotten up a while back and informed you that she was going on a walk, to which you nodded and said that you’d be here. She seemed pleased by the affirmation and went on her way.

Now, though...it’s almost completely dark outside and still no luck. You slump forward, elbows on your knees and head in your hands, feeling defeated.  Footsteps approach from behind, and you don’t need to turn to know Spinel is back. Deserted island, and all that.

“Hey...” you call out half-heartedly, not looking up.

“It, uh...doesn’t appear to be going too well,” Spinel comments as she sits across from you.  

You just groan in reply and toss the stones to the side, too tired to keep trying to light the damn thing.

“Mind if I take a crack at it?” Spinel asks, tentatively picking up the discarded rocks.

“Knock yourself out,” you say, gesturing to the unlit campfire.

The pink Gem gives it her best for a good ten minutes, but still no spark.

“I think I just have the wrong kinds of rocks,” you say sadly. It’s starting to get cold out now, the nice cool breeze from when the sun was out now carries a chill in the air. You wrap your arms around yourself, trying to stay warm.

“Hmm...” Spinel stands, looking for something on the ground. “What was that other thing you were tryin’ earlier?”

“Oh, the sticks? Yeah, that can work too, but it’s a lot more difficult since you have to maintain a constant speed and pressure. My arms are too tired now to do that again,” you reply, feeling the ache in your arms from almost three hours of work.

Spinel spots some sticks she deems worthy and plops back down in front of the fire site, a determined look in her eye.

“So, whaddya do for this again?” she asks, gazing at you across the way.

You walk over and show her to lay the flatter stick down, and to run the length with the shorter stick rapidly, creating ash that you drop into the kindling.  

“All right, I think I got it,” the gem replies, and begins to work the fire. After a moment, your eyes widen as she picks up the pace rapidly- you always forget Gems don’t have the same limitations humans do when it comes to speed and strength. Her arms blur and her face twists in concentration; after only a minute you’re already seeing smoke.

“Woah, great!” you exclaim, “Okay, now move the smoking bits to the kindling!”

Spinel doesn’t appear to have heard you, however. She continues scraping the sticks, picking up the pace still. You’re growing increasingly worried, when-

“Oh! Oh!”  

Spinel panics as the sticks themselves ignite. She was moving so fast, you guess she bypassed the kindling step...

“Ah, Spinel, it’s ok! Just toss them in the middle of the fire, this is wonderful! Be careful!” you add as an afterthought.  

Spinel follows your directions, and after a few minute of stoking, you have a contained campfire. You settle in with a sigh, away from where the smoke is blowing, and begin to get warm.

“Thanks, Spins,” you say gently, the nickname slipping out once more. You giggle quietly as she blushes and settles in closer to the fire, but surprises you when she meets your eyes this time.

“Ah, gee, no problem. Least I could do...”

You nod and give her a terse smile, and go back to holding your hands to the fire to warm them up.

“Should I talk to her now? About...everything?”  

You debate internally for a moment, before pushing through the awkwardness and blurting a question out.

“So...why did you do it?”  

Spinel looks at you blankly. “Do what?”

“Uh, you know...take me? Bring me here?”  

Her eyes narrow and you look away, face burning.

“I took ya to make those nobodies feel the way I feel. And...” she trails off, making you look back up at her. Her features are softer now, kinder, as she contemplates what to say next.

“...I meant what I said. When I took you. Felt like you were the only one who didn’t hate havin’ me around. At least, when I was...the way I was before.”

“Spinel...” you say softly, unsure if you should move closer or not.  

“But now, well. Guess you probably hate havin’ me around too, huh? Can’t say I blame ya. After all that I’ve...put you through. Done to you.”

You sigh in disappointment as the Gem works herself up. “Spinel, I...I can’t be the one to comfort you. Not right now. I don’t hate having you around, but...I’m not exactly thrilled to be here, either. I just-”

“No, it’s fine. You’re right. I’m s-sorry.”  

Spinel bunches her knees up to her chest and puts her head down between them. You’re concerned, but...you meant what you said, too. This isn’t something that can just be written off and forgotten about with a few self-deprecating remarks from Spinel. You resolve to be as kind to her as you can be- no more ignoring her like earlier- but you’re not going to rush in and help her figure out all of her shit, either. She needs to be the one to do that.  

After another half hour or so, you’re feeling warm again, and drowsy. You stand slowly, and Spinel flinches and lifts her head at the sudden sound.

“Just me,” you explain. “I’m just tired. Gonna go try and sleep in the tent thing. Are you...” you trail off, unsure if you should ask. But you do anyway.  

“Are you gonna be ok out here alone? I know Gems don’t sleep.”

“Y-yeah, I’ll be fine. You go rest,” Spinel says as she waves you off, turning to stare into the crackling fire.  

“Okay. Thanks. And uh, make sure the fire doesn’t burn the place down,” you say, trying to lighten the mood.  

She gives you a half smile at the joke, “Heh, don’t worry ‘bout it. I’ll keep watch for ya.”

You give her an awkward thumbs up and head to the lean-to, shaking your head at yourself. Gazing at the sorry bed and pillow of leaves you attempted to make, you worry if you’ll even be able to sleep at all, but...you have to try.

As you lie down, you’re happy to know that the heat of the fire still reaches here, and you can see Spinel sitting by it. Makes you feel safer, for sure. You let the dull crackle of the flames lull you to sleep...

x * x * x * x * x

You wake with a jolt as you feel a small pain in your arm. You look down and see a mosquito happily drinking away.

“Gah!” you exclaim, smacking the bug and bolting out of the tent.  

“Huh? What'sa matter?” Spinel says, her speech slightly slow. You briefly wonder if she had drifted off by the fire, even Pearl had been known to sleep occasionally if she had been overworked. And Spinel had definitely never rested before, not if she had been standing in a garden for 6,000 years...

“Oh, uh-” your mind snaps back to the present. “Just a bug bite scared me, that’s all. Sorry if I disturbed your rest,” you reply.

Spinel relaxes, seemingly relieved that you weren’t in any danger. She stands, stretching out her already stretchy limbs after sitting the whole night. As she moves around, your stomach growls impossibly loudly, and you flush in embarrassment.

“Uh, what was that?” Spinel says, trying to hide a smile. “That came from...you?”

“Ugh...yeah, it did. I’m starving...I don’t think I’ve eaten since my lunch break two days ago? Shit. With everything going on there wasn’t time. And I didn’t think to look for food yesterday...”

You walk over to the waterfall and pond, grateful that you have water at least. You take a few sips from the rock Spinel had gathered, wincing at the taste of the water. Definitely isn’t salt water, but it’s not exactly Aquafina, either.

“I gotta find food today. Fish, fruit, something,” you continue to explain to the Gem. “I need to know I’ll be able to survive here.”

“Oh, yeah, guess that’s pretty important,” Spinel agrees, and moves to stand by you. “I’ll help out today too, hmm?”

You smile up at the taller Gem and nod, grateful you won’t have to do everything alone. As you comb through the island, you can’t help glancing at your companion a couple times. She seems unbelievably determined to make up for what she’s done, darting around, stretching up to look in trees for fruit. You have to smile at the use of her form- something that was once menacing is now almost...endearing. But still, it’s hard to forget her wrapping you up and taking you away from everything.  

You furrow your brows and turn back to the tree you were looking in, feeling as if your heart is torn in two. You want so desperately to just start over with Spinel, but you know that all that she’s done to you will always be in the back of your thoughts. You just feel immensely conflicted. It’s easier to focus on simply surviving for the time being.

By midday, the two of you agreed to meet back up at the campsite, having split off from one another to cover more ground. You were able to find a couple coconuts that you have no way of breaking open, but no fruit you could eat right then.

You slump against a tree, waiting for Spinel to arrive, hopefully having had better luck than you.

“Y/n! Is this somethin’ you could eat?” Spinel calls out as she rushes into the clearing. Your eyes widen at what is in her arms- bunches and bunches of bananas!

“Ohthankgod,” you manage to get out before you grab some from the Gem, who looks bemusedly at you through the large quantities of fruit. You open a banana and take a bite, almost groaning at the taste. It’s just a simple banana, but god did it hit the spot. You go through three more fruits before you begin to feel full, and you slide down against a tree, finally satisfied.

“Ahh...thank you so much, Spinel,” you say, eyes closed in bliss.  

She chuckles and walks up next to you, her arms free of the fruit. She put them down by the lean-to a few minutes ago- you'd have to build some sort of container for them later so they don’t get dirty or bug infested.  

“Food is...so weird,” Spinel comments, looking down at your sitting form. “Dunno if I’d ever try it.”

You shrug, glancing up at the pink Gem. “Amethyst actually loves eating food. And uh, other non-food items too, for some reason. She’s wacky like that.” You smile fondly as you talk about your friends’ odd habits, suddenly missing her. If everything was normal, you’d probably be hanging out right now...

But nothing is normal, so you’re not with your friends. You’re with...her.

With a sigh you bring yourself to your feet, and walk away from Spinel, not wanting to say anything that might make things awkward again. You move to crouch by the bananas, trying to think about the best way to tie them up or store them. Spinel approaches from behind you, staying a foot or two back.

“What, uh...what now?” she asks, a hint of nervousness in her voice. You can tell that she must have sensed your mood change, and you feel a twinge of guilt. You don’t want to keep making her feel worse, but you can’t help but continually cycle between feeling fond of her and wanting to get off this damn island she’s stranded you on.  

You stand once more and turn to face her, hand on your hip as you ponder your next course of action.

“Well, we need to store the food safely, so they can’t get bugs in ‘em or get all mushy if it rains,” you say, mostly just thinking out loud. “I guess we could make another small lean-to and try to wrap them in palm leaves...”

Spinel nods and begins gathering the leftover materials from the first lean-to. “Whateva you say, toots. You know more about this stuff than me.”

You start to move to help her, when the pet name she called you registers.  

“Toots?” you think, blushing furiously as the nickname replays over and over in your head. “Where did that come from? Gosh...”

You resolve to try to not let the name render you incompetent, and begin to help Spinel, both of you working in tandem as you had last night to build a smaller hut.  

After around an hour, you stand back and place the finishing leaves on and in the lean-to, making sure all the dirt is covered up. You wrap bunches of bananas as best you can with the few leaves you have left, and shove them into storage.

“There!” you exclaim happily, “It’s almost kinda cute. Little banana hut.”

You look down on your creating with an odd sense of pride. It almost feels...nice, knowing you’re not entirely terrible at surviving in the wild. Though, with little to no danger on the island, you suppose it never would have been too difficult in the first place.

The sun is making its’ decent once more, and you realize you need to stoke the fire again before it gets cold. Luckily there’s no need to go through what you did yesterday; you can just take some smaller kindling and spread it around the fire, which should bring it back up in no time.  

As you work, Spinel begins pacing around the clearing, and when you glance up at the Gem, she looks strangely nervous.

“Spinel? You all right?”

She stops in her tracks and turns to reply. “Oh, heh, don’t worry ‘bout me, Y/n. Just a little antsy.”

“Oh, ok...do you want to go for a walk?” you ask softly. You realize you’ve been at the campsite for hours now, and aren’t surprised that the abandoned Gem doesn’t like staying in one spot for too long. You figure that’s why she must have gone on a walk yesterday too, and why she’s always eager to help on the excursions around the island. Makes perfect sense.

Spinel visibly relaxes at your suggestion, and shoots you a kind-hearted smile. “Yeah, that would help, I think.”

You nod and finish the work on the fire quickly, spreading and lighting kindling. When the fire is big and crackling once more, you stand and brush off your hands.  

“Wanna go walk around the beach? I bet it’s nice right now,” you say, gesturing in the direction of the closest shore.

Spinel nods, clasping her hands in front of her, and moves to walk next to you. When you reach the edge of where the trees and the beach meet, you almost gasp. The sky is a beautiful gradient of purple, blue,  orange, and red. The backdrop of the sky against the perfect shore is almost unreal. You’re reminded of the tranquility of walking in Beach City at night, the sea spray just reaching the boardwalk, the sound of the waves piercing the silence of the night.  

“Wow...” Spinel breathes out, moving closer to the edge of the water. “I never...I haven’t realized how pretty this planet can be.”

You let out a light chuckle, and move to stand next to her in the surf, your arms almost touching.  

“Y’know, stuff like this is why the Crystal Gems protect this planet so fiercely,” you explain, thinking of your friends fondly.   “They came here because of Homeworld, but stayed because of all this. And I guess the people weren’t so bad, either,” you joke, nudging your companion lightly. “Rose...uh, Pink Diamond, I guess you would know her as. She found love countless times through the years, so I was told. But none as great as Greg Universe- Steven's dad. That’s why she decided to...give up her form, you know. To give Steven life, bring him into the world. She saw something wonderful here and wanted to contribute in her own way.”

You look over at Spinel after you’ve finished talking, and see tears welling in her eyes.  

“Oh no, Spinel, I’m so sorry, I didn’t even-”

“No, no, it’s ok!” She cuts you off, sniffing and wiping at her eyes, tear marks still untouched. “I just...I didn’t know that about her. I didn’t know why she came here and...left me. There’s still a lot I don’t know, I think, but … somehow, hearing that helps a little.”

She takes a shaky breath in and turns to face you, gripping your arm with one hand.

“Y/n, I-”

Suddenly, a clap of thunder sounds out from behind you, startling you both. You turn to face the noise, and your stomach flips. A giant storm is almost right over the island, coming from the east, away from the sunset.  

“Oh my gosh. Shit! The fire!” you exclaim, turning away from Spinel and racing back towards camp, frantically trying to think of a way you can salvage the fire.  

From the looks of the storm clouds, you’d guess you have maybe 15 minutes before the rainfall reaches your little island. You’re hoping it’s just going to rain, maybe some thunder- hoping like hell this isn’t a tropical storm you have no way of preparing for.

“Uh...crap what do I do?!” you shout, frantically darting around aimlessly, trying to figure out some make-shift way to protect your camp.  

Spinel looks almost as panicked as you feel, and you can tell she has no idea how to help, not that you blame her. In the end you decide there’s no real way to protect the fire, so you settle for shoving some sticks and kindling into both lean-tos, hoping they’ll stay dry enough to be able to start a new fire tomorrow. You deflate as you feel small rain drops start to touch your skin, and you look helplessly as it picks up and puts out your fire that you and Spinel worked so hard to light. It almost makes you feel like crying, honestly. Not to mention that you know you’re going to be freezing all night now as well. Luckily the palm leaves seem to be staying on the branches fairly well, so you can at least dry off.

“Ugh, this is the worst,” you say, turning to a soaked Spinel. Thunder booms overhead and makes her jump, and you realize she probably has no context for anything that’s happening.

“Oh! It’s ok! It’s just rain,” you explain, feeling a bit like Steven. He’s told you of the time Peridot had to learn about rain, and then all the new Homeworld Gems did as well.  

“It’s gonna be cold and wet for a while but it just seems like a regular rain storm, so we’ll be ok,” you continue. “But uh, I need to make sure I stay warm so I don’t get sick.”

You glance to the larger lean-to, and groan slightly when you realize Spinel will have to sit in there with you until the rain stops.

“Um, let’s go sit inside,” you mumble, quickly taking the Gems’ hand and pulling her over to the hut. You duck under and move to the corner, making room for Spinel. It’s a tight fit, but you can at least lean against the far “wall”, which is really just the tree it’s propped up against, covered in branches and leaves.  

You settle in and find yourself shivering, your clothes and hair soaked thoroughly. Spinel notices your shaking and concern flashes across her face, her brows knitted together. As you wrap your arms around yourself, trying in vain to warm up, Spinel moves closer to you.

“Uh...listen, y’don’t look too hot there, uh...I could try and keep you warm if you’d like,” she says softly, staring at the ground between you.

Your stomach flips at her suggestion. You’re not entirely sure why, but the prospect makes you...nervous and excited at the same time. You don’t want to make things awkward or weird, but...you really need to get warm.

“O-okay, just so I don’t freeze, all right?”

She nods in agreement and scoots over until she’s directly next to you against the tree.

“I...think this would work best if I wrap you up, uh...like before. At least for now, until you feel warmer?” she says hesitantly, clearly not wanting to make you more uncomfortable.

Your heart beats faster as you nod, and move forwards so she’s able to reach all of you. She stretches her arms to wrap around your middle, and then your arms, encircling them slowly, glancing at your face every now and then to gauge your reactions.

For the most part you feel okay, though you can’t help flash back to the moment when Spinel took you. But this is so different, it’s...strangely comfortable. And definitely helping with the warmth. You shift back against the tree, trying to get in a position that you can stay in for a while. And trying very hard not to think about how good this feels.

Spinel leans back with you, staring anxiously down at your wrapped form.

“Is...is this ok?” she asks quietly, sounding unsure.  

“Yeah, this is...actually helping a lot,” you admit, noticing that you’ve stopped shivering. A sigh escapes your lips as you settle back further, closing your eyes. “It’s actually...really relaxing...”

You’re suddenly very warm and sleepy, and after all the hard labor you’ve been doing the past couple days, you’re not surprised in the least.

“Is it ok if I try and sleep?” you ask Spinel, your eyes still shut.

“Y-yeah, you should rest, Y/n,” she replies kindly.

You stay silent after that, and try to drift off to the sound of the rain and the feeling of being held. Your current position is making it rather difficult, however, as every time you start to fall asleep, your head droops forward or to the side and the sudden motion wakes you back up.

“Ughh...” you groan in frustration, opening your eyes and leaning your head back against the tree. “I’m so bad at sleeping sitting up.”

“Lemme help,” Spinel suddenly offers, and she moves as close to you as possible, keeping her arms stretched around you.  

“Lean on me,” she suggests, looking down to her shoulder.

Your eyes widen and your face heats up, and this time it’s you avoiding Spinel’s eyes as you nod and settle in against the taller gem. She’s strangely comfortable, for such a thin being.  

“Thank you, Spins,” you say sleepily, thankfully slipping back into your drowsy state once more. After a few minutes, you feel Spinel’s head rest against yours, and as you drift off in her warm embrace, you realize you could get used to this.  

[mamawolfblood]

Though he didn't know it yet Chris Mclean was in for a shocking revelation. One of the campers is not exactly just some rando kid. This camper is his kid and she is out to expose it.

Name : Iris  Escalona

Age 16

Eye color green

Caramel skin

Black hair that she keeps in a high ponytail. A Cherokee rose on the left side of the hair tie.

Iris is 5ft 8",135lb

Out fit-White tanktop with the alchemists symbol blue acid washed jean shorts black converses

Iris has a dark sense of humor. She loves horror,pranks,is resourceful. Iris is not above smashing some skulls together. She is not quick to anger but Heather pushes a lot of her buttons.

All her life she just wanted Chris to know she was alive. Her mother never gave the reason why she left. She is the oldest of seven children.

________chapter 3_________

• Chris: Last time on Total Drama Island, twenty-three campers arrived and learned that they'll be spending the next eight weeks at the crusty old summer camp. The campers we're faced with their first challenge, jumping off a cliff into the shark-infested waters. While most campers took the plunge, a few were forced to wear the dreaded chicken hat. At the campfire ceremony, it all came down to two campers, Courtney has experience as a CIT in summer camp, but refused to jump, and Ezekiel managed to tick off every female at the camp with his sexist comments about women, in the end, the first camper voted off Total Drama Island was Ezekiel, proving that homeschooling and reality TV don't mix, who will be voted off this week in this dramatic campfire ceremony yet? Find out tonight on Total... Drama...Island.

Iris woke up early and snuck into the kitchen.

It looked a mess it was four in the morning so she needed something to do.

(Confessionals)

Iris looked into the camra

"Ok so ever since I was ten I wake up at four in the morning. Some nights I don't even sleep. Doctors can't figure out why but hey at least I can do something before the challenge starts."

*Static*

(End of Confessionals)

Iris was almost done cleaning when Chef walked in. "And what are you doing up?" Chef said crossing his arms. "Sorry Chef woke up at four and couldn't go back to sleep. I decided to clean the kitchen to help you out. If you need help cooking I can do that too." She said still scrubbing. "Awe thats real nice of you sweetpea. But I can take it from here go get washed up. The mess hall looks great. " Iris stood up saluting him. He did the same to her and she went to the showers.

(Confessionals)

Chef

That girl is a sweetheart. I haven't met a kid who would just clean without being asked. Her parents raised her right she will make a man happy one day.

*static *

(End of Confessionals)

Iris walked into the mess hall. Chef had a cup of coffe ready for her. "Here you go sweetie thanks again for cleaning the place up." He said making her bluch. "No problem if you need any help you can always ask."  She said sitting down. "Why did you clean this dump?! You never do anything nice." Courtney came over before Iris could take on sip of her ainti murder juice. Holding up one finger Iris took a drink. "Ok child now that I had a caffeine shot I can speak. I wake up a four am every day. Why I do not know I just do. Some nights I don't even sleep. As for doing something nice goes. Unlike you I was raised to help someone when I physically can. You were shelter from the world thats why your a spoild brat.  Do you want me to spill what it was you did to my brother, or are you going to sit back down like a good girl?" Iris was now glaring at the pampered princess. Courtney like any other teenage girl that doesn't get her way, stomped away with a "Ahh!"  I waved her finger at the child.

Chris walked in "alright campers time for your challenge. Both teams will complete one lap around the Island. The team that completes the race first wins. "  Trent asked about breakfast. "Oh you will eat after the race. Ready set go!" He laughed as everyone ran.

Iris pov

It was a nice warm up but ,I doubt that this is the actual challenge.  When we made it back to the mess hall a buffet was waiting for us. It was so beautiful I wanted to cry. Though something sinister is happening here. This is a set up so I'm not going to eat to much. I saw cranberries the kind you get on Thanksgiving and chowd down. It was refreshing everyone else asked why I wasn't eating anything but Cranberries. "Think about it why would they give us this food. It's a plot for the challenge. Trust me I want to chow down with all of you." I said making them shrug and go back to eating. Courtney was glaring at me. I think about it the guy that asked me the question was Duncan.

(Confessionals)

Iris started laughing.

"Oh she is a treat I will thoroughly enjoy this."

*Static*

(End of Confessionals)

"Hey Duncan can you step outside with me? This won't take long." I said standing up. He shrugged and followed me outside. Once we were out of ear shot I turned to him.

Meanwhile in the mess hall.

Courtney pov

"They have been gone for awhile. I'll go check on them." I said having campers telimg me to leave them be. Iris is a conveying snake you can't ever trust her.

"Hey guys what are yo-Ah!" I walked out to find them making out. I march up to them and pull him away getting in her face. She smirks at me. "Hello Courtney how can I help you?" She chuckles "You can help me by not macking on my teammate you snake." I growled

(Confessionals Duncan, Iris)

Duncan

"If she is a snake and thats her bite. Please bite me some more."

*static*

Iris

"*laughs* oh wow I was right she likes him. This is going to be a fun day for Duncan and me. He is on board with the plan. Obviously he is enjoying this too. *smirks* bey bey second place Courtney"

*Static*

Iris pov

Duncan stood between myself and Courtney crossing his arms. "I think you should run inside. You don't own me there four have no say in my actions." He said wrapping one arm around me. I place my hand on his chest the top of my head under his chin. I was side glancing at her. She growled stomping away. Once she was gone we bust out laughing.  He picked me up bridal style carrying me inside. "This is mine no one else can have her." He said sitting me down at my seat we started to feed each other. "Can you two get a room?" Heather complained. "Can you get a new attitude." I said making her gasp.

Once the buffet was cleared Chris came back in. "Everyone ready for the awake athon!" I knew it and they say I'm a snake. "Wait so you had us eat all this food so you can see who will fall asleep first?" Gwen asked "Yes Gwen Yes I did" I laughed "oh that so evil its good."  I said "Glad your finding this amusing lose lips" Courtney said  "Hey they are open for you too." I wink at her. "Your disgusting " she said following Chris to the pit fire. I sat in Duncan's lap during the challenge to get on princess sunshine's nerves. Its almost night fall I'm about to fall asleep. Duncan puts his hand on my cheek "got to stay awake gorgeous. How can I look into those beautiful eyes if they are closed?" I giggle at the sickeningly sweetness. "Let her fall asleep at least I won't be second place. " Courtney said  laughing "oh your second place in everything so shut up. " I said before glares at her.

Its now been twent-four hour mark. Come on stupid bass fall asleep. I thought to myself. It was now Myself, Trent,and Gwen for the Gophers and the Bass only had Courtney and Duncan.  Once Chris started to read the history of Canada Courtney, and Trent fell asleep.  Leaving Gwen, Duncan and me. "I have to hit the can" Duncan said as the camra crew followed him. Gwen fell asleep I was about to when Chris announced that the Gophers won. I smile before falling flat on my face.

• [The Killer Bass are standing outside of the cabins, stuff are outside due to Eva throwing them because she can't find her MP3 because Heather stole it.]

•

• Eva: [screaming angrily] Where is my MP3 player?! One of you must stolen it, I need my music! No one is going anywhere until I get my MP3 player back! [She angrily throws a book, which almost hits Harold]

•

• Courtney: Okay, whoever took it better give it up now before she destroys the whole camp.

•

• Heather: Hey, guys, wow, this place is a real mess.

•

• Courtney: Someone stole Eva's MP3 player.

•

• Heather: [holds Eva's MP3 player] Who don't mean this to you? [Eva is surprised that Heather found her MP3 player, which Heather actually stole it] I was wondering who it belonged to, I found it by the campfire pit. You must have dropped it.

•

• Eva: Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!

• Heather: Sure thing. [Leaves. Static buzzing, in the confessional] Turn a team against their own members, easiest trick in the book. (Static buzzing)

• Eva: [smiles sheepishly] So, sorry about the that little misunderstanding. [The Killer Bass glare at Eva] Guess no one stole it after all. Okay, maybe I overreacted a little. [Laughs sheepishly]

Iris and the Gophers watch the marshmallow ceremony of the Killer Bass. It was down to Alpha geek Harold and wack Job Eva. Both looked nervous until Chris gave it to Harold. Wow did not see that one coming. They threw away their strongest team mate. Welp looks like the Gophers have it even easier now.

Chris "you All can get some sleep tonight you all are safe for now. Find out what happens next time on Total Drama Island."

(Have I mention how much I don't like Courtney yet. Well I don't have a great day/evening)