#despite never giving me a clear answer on what these aro only posts were

[stardustdiver]

didnt think id be getting arophobia from the ace memes subreddit, suppose it is reddit after all i shouldn't be suprised..

aroace memes it is, its v quiet there compared tho

so, since i initially posted this, OP has deleted their post, and reuploaded but with this commentary:

HOWEVER

and the fact that the OG post garnered 891 upvotes prior to deletion (not taking into account downvotes for bonus math), and anyone pointing out the holes in the argument and the point it was invalidating a large segment of the subreddit userbase were being downvoted initially has shown me all i need to know about the subreddit

[cat-sapphics]

Hey!

I follow the" aroace lesbian" tag and your recent posts have come up in my feed so I just wanted to say that being arospec, acespec (demiromatic graysexual, both labels in the aromantic and asexual spectrums) & lesbian is completely OKAY and you should not let anyone tell you the contrary. Especially uneducated people so 😚🤍

Many aroaces use the term aroace to encompass being in both aromantic and asexual spectrums; this means you experience little to no romantic/sexual attraction and that's more than valid. You can be both arospec and aspec! 🔥 Or arospec and asexual. Aromantic and acespec 🥺🤝

The way YOU experience romantic and sexual attraction is just different to the average allo person, & that doesn't make it any less valid. Attraction is an abstract concept and we shouldn't be putting ourselves into boxes but letting feelings be that, feelings.

Your experiences are necessary and important to our diverse & big aro/ace communities as an aroace lesbian! An aspec person is that who experiences little to no romantic attraction. That's it. THAT'S OKAY 🥰

And being an aspec lesbian is more than valid too, it's not a contradictory term because the little and fluctuating romantic & sexual attraction you DO experience, is ONLY towards women/nb so; I don't see why lesbian isn't a term you can't use. A lesbian is a women/nb female aligned person who experiences romantic, sexual and/or emotional attraction towards women/nb female aligned people. Check, check & check ✅

All in all, ace lesbians, aro lesbians and aroace lesbians are ALL part of the lesbian community & our unique experiences with romance and sex are necessary and valid for it 💓

Sorry if this got long, hope I made my point clear. Aroace lesbians have always been lesbians so don't let any exclusionists steal your peace 🧡🤍💖

thank you!! thank ya thank ya thank ya!! i really appreciate it <3

i will say, i think some of the anons i got did make some valid points (obviously not everywhere you look but they at least gave me something to think about in general) but it really took me by surprise how condescending and disapproving they all were. super uneducated too, i said i experience attraction differently or at least less frequently than average allo people and like ?? that doesn't mean i'm secretly a self-hating lesbophobe ?? you don't get to determine that for me if i'm genuinely happy even though i participate in lesbian discourse and am passionate about keeping the definition specific and closed ?? lol i didn't redefine lesbian or take away its initial meaning so it really had me peeved

i think most of their comments reflect on how they don't believe in aromanticism and asexuality being a spectrum, which i guess i invited by my own doing since i have some conservative and exclusionary views on the lgbt community and that affects my following/audience, but my response to that is that i use these labels because they bring me personal comfort. when i say i'm demiromantic i don't mean that alloromantics have zero standards when it comes to a potential partner or are completely mesmerized by the idea of hook-ups, just that the connection they need to start crushing comes within a decent time period with a personal connection, but not a super strong and deep and loving one that makes it exceptionally hard to fall in love despite however much we may desire to. the label doesn't exist to imply something bad about """normal""" people, it exists to name an experience many people have but to an intense degree. so, yes, it's a pointless social construct, it probably means nothing to you and that's fine, but it still means something to me. i'm not crying oppression or marginalization, and i'm not claiming that i'm lgbt on the basis of being demiromantic/greyasexual, but through being a nonbinary lesbian. that's the difference between mspec lesbians and aspec lesbians, is one is actively harmful to multiple groups and actually Does spawn from a place of internalized lesbophobia and/or biphobia, and the other is just "mmk this is just for me and affects nothing at all, it doesn't drag you into anything at all, i still qualify for lesbian the way you (should!) see it as technically even if you do believe it's redundant, so just... leave me alone" cause it reflects more on them than me when they make it their business by unfairly assuming things about me

same applies to me being greyasexual. still trying to figure out if it means that i experience sexual/physical attraction less frequently, less intensely, or both, but does that matter?? genuinely?? this is also redundant but i didn’t wanna leave it out of the paragraph about me being demiro fk;ljslkgbdvhbs. the aro disapproval part isn’t acceptable at all but i can at least see it since romance is so normalized and is a core part of, y’know, lgb relationships; the greyace disapproval however....... i don’t wanna label it as acephobia because i don’t really believe in aphobia being a thing, but it still kinda rubs me wrong to claim that sexual/physical attraction is a requirement ykyk... NOTHING WRONG WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE SEX OF COURSE (i myself kinda wanna try someday if that works out) i just think frowning upon someone who doesn’t UNLESS they try to claim they’re lgbt on that basis is.................. not really cool. i really hope people who read this understand what i’m trying to say and don’t label me as an ace inclus who thinks aphobia and oppression are real, i was just trying to make a point about my personal experiences oops lmao

and then it became "aroace means NO ATTRACTION AT ALL" okay... so i'm angled aroace, that's a sub-term since aroace is literally an umbrella term, actually (unlike lesbian, shit's complicated ykyk). "YOU'RE NOT AROACE THEN"....... they don't even like the idea of oriented aroace now either, so like, what then, are aroace people just never allowed to feel love or positive feelings from other people ever? jesus christ. i'm not even getting into this, i consider aro/ace identities to be secondary to describe one's attraction so this debate should not be as important as, say, discourse centering the L, G, B, or T. it's just dumb all around tbh

hope i addressed all the arguments against it, but i can't really care at this point if i missed something :/ i'll probably get a mean anon about it so don't worry!! /s jslgjgjkshkj;lhfp

speaking of, i've had to delete so many anons and even turn off the option to ask anonymously because of this discourse. it's so pointless in my opinion, so i've just stopped giving them my time unless i think it's worth answering - but even then, i try to keep it fairly short. i genuinely was not expecting my take on (cishet) ace discourse to turn into myself failing to be seen as a "real lesbian" despite literally meeting its definitive qualifications and then it just kept building up ?? stan behavior tbh, especially since plenty of them obviously come from the same users

i apologize for the rant. i just never really felt like i'd be listened to if i tried to explain my identity, so i gave up and just tried to ignore my way out of it. so i really genuinely appreciate your ask, especially since i can identify you. it really feels like i actually have someone on my side now, so even if you ever disagree i'd know you wouldn't harass me about it. it really means a lot, i really needed this from you and i don't wanna dump more shit but i feel that you deserve to know. so thank you again <3

[bonjour-rainycity]

The Long Way Around ~ Chapter 13

Link to previous part: https://bonjour-rainycity.tumblr.com/post/624296456441020416/the-long-way-around-chapter-12

Pairing: Jasper x Reader

Word count: 3911 (yikes, t’is a doozy)

Warnings: Language and violence

Y/n’s POV

Jasper immediately tenses, taking a defensive stance quite similar to Arthur’s. “How many?”

“Six,” Alice answers, her voice shaky.

“Six?!” I hear the panic in my own voice, but can’t force it down. This is not good.

“Damn it,” Jasper growls, darting closer to my side.

“What are their intentions?” Carlisle’s calm demeanor never fades.

Alice concentrates, scrunching her eyes. Whatever Jasper feels from her makes him tense.

“They mean war then,” he concludes, his voice low.

Alice nods, biting her lip. “They want our territory, and they’ve been looking for an excuse to start a fight.”

“And we just gave it to them,” Carlisle laments, head falling in shame.

“Carlisle,” Edward comes to a swift stop near Emmett. “I can hear their thoughts—they’re about five miles away. They’re coming under the pretense of peace, but Alice is right. As soon as they have the opportunity, they’ll try to destroy us.”

Emmett cracks his knuckles, the picture of grim determination. “They won’t get the chance. We’ll swing first.”

“No,” Carlisle shakes his head, authority seeping from his voice. “Perhaps there’s a chance to resolve this peacefully. I would like to exhaust negotiations before we resort to a fight.” Carlisle calls for the rest of the family, beckoning them to join us outside the home. While they gather, Jasper grabs my hands tightly, speaking in a low voice.

“If someone gets a hand on you, fight back. Use your ability, bite them, whatever. Just don’t let them get a good hold on you.”

I nod, trying to soak up the information and keep awareness of our surroundings. Five miles for vampires is nothing, and I wonder how quickly the other coven will be upon us.

Jasper continues, speaking so fast I have to concentrate to understand him. “If they go for your neck, bring your arms to their own head. Pull down and twist at the same time, and you should be able to decapitate them. Fall with your momentum, that will give you extra leverage. Do not get near a fire, especially if you’re injured. That could kill you. Stay as close to me, Emmett, or Alice as you can. We’re the best fighters. Edward is a good next choice, though he’ll be distracted, keeping an eye on Bella and everyone’s thoughts. If all else fails, act on instinct, and rely on your ability as much as possible. Remember, if you don’t kill them, they will kill you.”

I gulp, fear resting in a pit in my stomach. I don’t want to kill anyone, and I really don’t want anyone from my new family to get hurt. But Jasper is right. This is kill or be killed.

The sound of approaching footfalls sends me into a panic, and I throw myself into Jasper’s arms. He hugs me tightly and kisses my forehead. Then, with a final, determined look, he releases me and goes to stand at the front near Carlisle.

Our family makes up a loose formation, and I assume it has some strategic benefits that are lost on me. Carlisle takes point, though he is flanked closely by Emmett and Jasper. Emmett with his strength and Jasper with his experience makes sense, but Carlisle towards the front makes me nervous. I know he is there to express our diplomatic intentions, but I have a feeling that if it comes to a fight, he will be in significant danger. Bella and Edward are next, arms around each other and looking determined. To my right are Alice and Arther, holding hands, and I can tell by Alice’s expression she is keeping careful watch of our future. Towards the back, Rosalie and I stand slightly in front of Esme, trying to keep her out of view. I really, really hope Esme stays safe. The desire to protect my kind, selfless mother-figure is strong, and I swallow, determined to do my best to keep her from harm. Although I must admit, given my limited experience, most of the burden will be placed on Rosalie. By the set in her shoulders, I know she’s aware of this.

The branches sway slightly as six unknown vampires come to a stop a hundred feet in front of Carlisle. Two women, four men, all with bright red eyes. None near as burly as Emmett, but all bigger than Alice. I feel a flash of worry for my new sister.

Carlisle breaks the silence and forces me to refocus. “Welcome. Allow me to introduce my family.” He points us out according to our formation, careful to group us and subtly remind the others that the are outnumbered. Are they scared, I wonder? Only Jasper or Edward would know. But Edward’s head does not move to answer my thoughts, and I realize he’s keeping carefully still so as not to alert the other vampires of his ability. Smart. I will keep mine a secret too, then, for as long as I can.

“It is lovely to meet you all,” the woman towards the front of the other group, the leader, I presume, speaks but doesn’t introduce her own coven. Her voice is silky, smooth, and slightly accented. I find myself leaning forward, wanting to hear her speak more. Thankfully, she does. “We’ve been aware of your presence for a while, though fearful to approach. It seems that while you preach peace towards humans, you follow a law of violence in regard to your own kind.”

“My apologies.” Carlisle matches her conversational tone, though his is nowhere near as pleasing to the ears. “I must admit, we were on our guard after a member of your coven attacked one of ours.”

“Oh, yes,” the woman laments, her crimson eyes immediately locking on Esme. I push down the growl threatening to rise. “We do regret the treatment of your sweet wife. Hélene is one of our more…” she hums lightly, beginning to twirl one of her dark braids around her finger, “aggressive members. Or,” she fixes Carlisle with a chiding stare, “should I say, was.”

Carlisle clasps his hands, looking repentant. “Yes, it is regrettable what happened in the woods. It is my wish that no further violence take place between us.”

“Ah,” the woman tsks, taking a small step in our direction. I tense, as does nearly everyone around me, but she makes no further move to approach. “How can there be peace between us when you keep such a feral vampire in your group? It is interesting that you would keep one of us among you. Wouldn’t you rather be with your own kind, dear? Somewhere you can hunt humans without the,” she sighs dramatically, shaking her head, “oppression?”

Rosalie’s hand clasps around my wrist, tightening. The message is clear. Don’t speak.

Following Rosalie’s direction, I keep silent. Instead, it is Carlisle who answers the woman. “I assure you, Y/n is part of our family and is learning to follow our lifestyle of her own volition. Her eyes are red because she is a newborn. Soon, her eyes will resemble ours.”

The woman grimaces, obviously displeased. “And she cannot speak for herself? Please, allow me to meet the girl who is responsible for the deaths of my friends. Come forward, dear.”

I take a step forward, then another, despite Rosalie’s ever-tighter grip and not knowing when I consciously decided to begin moving. Jasper takes a quick step so he’s blocking my path, and Edward shoots out an arm to stop me. Why?

“Careful, the woman is particularly convincing. Her gift has even taken Aro’s notice.”

The woman laughs in delight, and, still, I want to run towards her voice. So beautiful, so inviting. “And how would you know, sweet Edward?” Then her eyes light up in understanding. “Unless, you have a gift that has captured Aro’s attention as well?”

Edward ignores the woman aside from fixing her with a hard stare.

“A man of few words, I see,” she says, sounding disappointed. “No matter. Carlisle, I join you in your desire for peace.” I relax, glancing at Alice in hopes that her expression will confirm my conclusion: that the danger is gone, that a fight will be avoided. But instead I see her look of horror, followed by Edward’s snarl, and my hopes are dashed. They are replaced by fear.

“Until that peace can be achieved though,” the woman shakes her head in mock sadness, “I’m afraid we will need recompense for the murder of our friends. An eye for an eye, I suppose.”

Jasper snarls, the sound sending a new wave of fear through me. Still, it’s not enough to drown out the woman’s soft, inviting voice.

“Y/n, come here please.”

I know she is using her ability on me. I can feel it settling over my body and pricking at my mind. I know better than to step forward.

But I can’t stop myself. I’m not even able to form the thoughts necessary to halt my steps. All I can focus on is her voice and following her command.

I speed up, meaning to run to her.

A freight train slams into my side, knocking me straight to the ground. I struggle, and when the blonde braid smacks me in the face, I rename the freight train as Rosalie.

“Rose, let me go, I-I need to-”

“Y/n, stay down, she’s going to kill you.” I feel a set of hands on my shoulders and recognize them as Esme’s.

The woman tsks again. “Now, now, it is only fair. Count your blessings. We only require the death of one to repay the deaths of two. Were we vengeful, we would demand more of your heads.”

“Carlisle,” Edward mutters, obviously hoping only our family will hear. “They saw how you all rushed to Y/n’s aid in the woods, they’re trying to start a fight. They want our territory and need us to attack first in order to justify their actions to the Volturi. Aro-” whatever Edward was about to say is interrupted by the woman’s sweet, melodic voice.

“Or, perhaps he would volunteer to die in the place of his young mate? Jasper, come forward.”

“No!” My shriek echoes through the yard, but seems to fall on deaf ears.

The woman croons and beckons him with a single finger. Jasper’s eyes glaze over, and I know he’s under the influence of her gift as I was mere seconds ago.

He takes a single step forward. Then another.

The woman smiles. “That’s it, Jasper. Come to me.”

He takes another step forward, nearly passing Carlisle, and I panic. Edward and Bella hurry to grab him, to stop him, but Jasper is too quick. He dodges their advances and continues his pace towards the woman, whose smile has turned sadistic.

I throw Rosalie and Esme off me, running to him.

“Jasper, don’t you dare!” I fling myself in front of him, grabbing his face in my hands and forcing him to look at me.

He blinks, shakes his head, and then the spell is broken. Thank goodness. He briefly buries his face in my hair and inhales before pushing me behind him.

The woman sighs, seeming only mildly inconvenienced. “Oh well.”

Then, she lunges for Carlisle’s throat.

Emmett attacks from the side, plowing her into the dirt. The remaining five vampires hurry to join the fight. Jasper growls, pushing me further back into our group.

A pair of hands grabs my shoulders and forces me to the side. I bring my leg up to kick my assailant away, but it’s only Rosalie, pushing me to avoid a sandy-haired vampire. I gasp and stumble back, only to have someone lock their hand around my wrist.

“Hello there,” the vampire croons, using his free hand to reach towards my face. Acting on instant, I grab it, and use his hold on my other hand to throw him on the ground. He kicks behind my knees, causing me to fall on top of him and rolls so I’m pinned beneath his weight. He leans down, teeth bared, intent on biting me. The growl that rips through my is fierce and, momentarily, I can see the fear in his eyes. I claw at his face, creating a deep gash, and he howls. I use his distraction against him and flip us. He breaks free from my grip and reaches for my neck.

Someone pulls me off of the man and I panic until I see Arthur’s grim face to my right. “Hold his arm.”

I do as he says, noticing Alice mirroring my actions on the man’s other side. Without warning, Arthur surges forward and grips the man’s head in his hands. A twist, pull, and a terrible screech later, Arthur holds the man’s severed head. I gasp, releasing the man’s arm and stumbling back. Shit.

Alice produces a lighter and sets the man ablaze. An awful smell fills the air.

“Five,” Arthur calls out, tossing the man’s head into the flames.

A pained, infuriated scream pierces the air, and all heads whip towards Rosalie who clutches her shoulder. I run to her, but Jasper and Emmet are already there, quickly doing to her assailant as Arthur, Alice, and I had done to mine.

“Four,” Emmett declares, hurrying to check on Rosalie. Edward and Bella cover their backs while Emmett sucks the venom out.

I toss my head around wildly, searching for Jasper. Where is he? Where is he?!

I finally find him about fifty yards east of his previous location, wrestling with the leader of the enemy coven. Emmett must’ve let her go to tend to Rosalie.

The woman croons, and, even from here, I can feel the force of her voice.

“Jasper, let me go. You don’t want to kill me.”

Jasper hesitates, and I break out at a sprint towards him. Get away, get away, get away! Seeming frozen, Jasper falls to his knees, releasing the woman and allowing her to place her hands on either side of his head. She smiles serenely. “Good boy.”

“No!” I launch myself forward, tackling the woman. We collapse to the ground in a tangle of limbs and snarls. I feel the sharp pain as her teeth sink into my leg. With a growl, I focus on putting the pain behind the force of my ability. In the next second, she releases her hold on me, screaming in agony. Jasper appears then, thankfully having snapped out of the trance, and braces the woman’s back against his own with his hands on her head. He pulls forcefully, and the screams cease. Using a lighter of his own, he lets the flames consume the body.

“Three.” Jasper’s voice is tight, and his eyes don’t leave mine. “Are you okay?”

Swallowing my fear and horror, I nod. Those feelings can be dealt with once we’re out of danger. Jasper nods once, then darts to our right to aid Carlisle and Edward in the killing of another  vampire. He’s distracted though. He keeps throwing glances back at me and turning so I’m in his line of sight. The captured vampire senses Jasper’s lack of focus and takes the opportunity to sink his teeth into Jasper’s wrist. I run to him, hating how his face contorts in pain. Despite being held firmly by Edward and Carlisle, the man surges forward, snapping in my direction. His efforts stop the second Jasper tears his head from his neck. Edward sets the body ablaze, calling out a “two.”

As I gasp out his name, Jasper grips my waist, twisting us to the side. We narrowly avoid the vampire soaring through the air attempting to tackle us. He is trailed by Esme and Emmett, who quickly have the aid of Carlisle and Edward. With another sickening screech, we hear Esme’s voice ringing clear: “one”.

Now, it’s easy.

Only the other female remains, and my family quickly surrounds her.

She begins to beg for her life. “Please, let me go. I didn’t want to fight, I had no choice. Cora, our leader, forced us to. You’ve heard her voice, you know how convincing she is!” Her words increase in pitch and volume the closer Jasper and Emmett get to her. She dissolves into hysterics.

“Stop.” Esme’s command is quiet, but desperate. “Perhaps we can negotiate and come to an understanding.”

As we turn to glance at Esme, the woman has her opportunity. She launches herself at Jasper, gripping him around the neck and twisting. I scream, certain I’m about to see Jasper’s head fall to the ground.

But miraculously, he falls into the twist, rolling with the woman until he has her in an unbreakable lock. I vaguely recognize the hold as one he’s put me in before.

But this woman and I had vastly different outcomes.

Sharply, Jasper pushes the woman towards Emmett, who beheads her in one quick motion.

We’re silent as he throws the body into the fire.

Carlisle is the one who breaks the silence, sighing sadly and rubbing his forehead.

I exhale in relief, running to Jasper at the same time that he reaches for me. He kisses me like he did in the woods, and I pull him impossibly closer. When we separate, I exhale again and bury my head in his chest, thankful for the strong arms wrapping around me in a hug. Then I sigh, remembering the bite on his wrist.

“Let me see your arm.”

He shakes his head, kneeling on the ground and taking my leg gently in his hands. “You first.” I grit my teeth when he makes contact with the broken skin, though I do enjoy the feeling of his lips on my thigh. Perhaps we’ll have to revisit that later. Then, I have an idea, and rest my hand lightly on his shoulder, intending to pull the pain out of his arm that way. By his soft smile, it’s doing the trick. Still, once he rises, I take his wrist gingerly in my hands and suck out the venom. That’ll help it heal faster, anyway.

“You wouldn’t have gotten hurt if you didn’t try to be everywhere at once,” I chide.

But he just shrugs easily, pressing a light kiss on the side of my head. “It’s my job, darlin’.”

The new pet name helps ease my annoyance somewhat.

Once Jasper and I are satisfied the other is not harmed further, we turn our attention back to our family.

Thankfully, we sustained only minor injuries. Rosalie nurses her bite, and thankfully accepts my help in dealing with the pain. Emmett lost a finger, which Carlisle found and promptly reattached. It’s a miracle it hadn’t been thrown into the fires. Other than that and mine and Jasper’s bites, we’re all good. I marvel at our success, endlessly grateful that everyone is okay.

Carlisle, however, looks grim. “We’ll need to put out these fires soon to avoid suspicion. Alice, Edward, do you know of any others that might come to challenge us?”

They both concentrate but, thankfully, report in the negative. We can’t know for sure, of course, but for now, we’re as satisfied as is possible.

“I did notice something concerning in Cora’s thoughts,” Edward shares, almost hesitantly. We all fix him a look, anxious for him to continue. “They had hoped we would attack first so they could claim innocence to the Volturi. If that didn’t happen, they were obviously prepared to start the fight themselves. But,” he hesitates, and then seems to force himself to continue. “They were careful to leave Alice and I untouched. It seems they share the Volturi’s concerns with destroying our gifts.”

Carlisle’s expression darkens. “You think Aro had something to do with this?”

My eyebrows shoot up.

Edward grimaces. “She didn’t think of it long, but I glimpsed a conversation between Cora and Aro. From what I could gather, Aro was willing to overlook the attack on our family if it led to me and Alice joining him.”

Arthur growls, and Jasper’s arm tightens around my waist.

Carlisle looks dejected. “It seems Aro and I have much to discuss. I will plan a trip.”

“No,” Esme and Alice protest at the same time.

“Carlisle you can’t,” Alice continues, reaching forward to grab one of his hands in both of hers. “He obviously doesn’t care about your life. What if he uses the opportunity to destroy you?”

Carlisle sighs, shaking his head. “I will have to trust that he would refrain out of respect for our friendship. Regardless of the risk, I have to take care of my family. I won’t allow Aro to continue supporting threats against us like this. At the very least, I can get him to publicly condemn the attack. That will tie his hands going forward.”

Looking absolutely heartbroken, Esme rests her head on Carlisle’s shoulder. But we all know he’s right. Unless we can confront Aro in a manner that also does not directly implicate him, attacks like these are likely to continue.

Jasper brings my hands to his mouth and presses a light kiss on each set of knuckles. Then, looking determined, he turns towards Carlisle. “I would like to go with you.”

If I had a beating heart, it would have stopped. “What? Jasper no, you-”

But he shakes his head, his thumb smoothing over my hip. “He’ll need me to monitor Aro’s intentions, and I’ll be good in a fight, if it comes to that.”

Carlisle nods, though a look of regret is on his face. “It’s true. Jasper’s help will be invaluable, and I can’t take Edward or Alice. It will be too tempting for Aro. It’s risky enough bring Jasper.”

“Well then he shouldn’t go,” I protest, angry now. Why does Jasper always have to be the one risking himself? He’s thrown himself into my path more than once, watched everyone’s back during the fight, and now he’s going to one of the most dangerous places for our kind? For that matter, send me, I-

“That’s a terrible idea.” Edward’s harsh tone interrupts my thoughts.

“It is not,” I counter. “You said Jane was part of the Volturi? Well maybe you need someone to even her out.”

Jasper pulls me closer against him, and my suspicious calm causes me to give him the side-eye.

Carlisle smiles softly. “While I appreciate your willingness to help, Y/n, we really can’t take you with us. We’ll be taking a plane to Volterra, and the area itself is heavily populated. Perhaps a future trip.”

I sigh, knowing he’s right. But still, not Jasper…

“I’m going, too.” Esme’s soft but firm voice interrupts my thoughts. Carlisle immediately begins to protest, but she holds a hand up to his mouth. “I will not be separated from you, understand?”

With a defeated look, Carlisle nods.

Emmett raises a hand, a grin on his face. “I’m in, too.”

Edward shakes his head. “Knowing Aro, he’ll interpret more than three of us as a threat, especially if we send you, big as you are.” Good-naturedly, Edward softly punches Emmett’s shoulder then pretends to grip his hand in pain. That lightens the tension a little bit.

“Well, it’s settled, then.” Carlisle straightens his scarf and takes Esme’s hand in his. “I’ll book our flights for tomorrow morning.”

So soon…

Feeling my growing sense of dread, Jasper tugs on my hand. “Come with me for a bit?” I sigh, nod, and allow him to pull me further into the woods.

A/n Ahh, that was a long one! What did you think? Let me know if you would like to be added to the tag list!

xx, 

Bjr

Next part: https://bonjour-rainycity.tumblr.com/post/625017063484833792/the-long-way-around-chapter-14

Tag list: @puer-de-infinitate @charliestuff @meri-soni-meri-tamanna @one-thread-can-save-a-life @salsameter @enchantedcruelsummer @meashy-moo @sana-li @femflorals @80strashbag @tomisbaeholland @heyimval13 @triscuitcracker @deviantly-gayy

[thedreadvampy]

this is kind of a Hot Take (and rlly long) so don't feel pressured to post this

also no one cancel thedreadvampy over posting this ask if she does these are my beliefs and not necessarily hers kthx

I'm honestly really uncertain why people are so militant about aphobia on this site. like obviously aphobes are Not Nice People and it's good to be against their shitty beliefs. But I've been on this site for ~5 years and I have never, in my memory, seen an aphobe (with the few exception of like. literal nazis but their main label isn't aphobe). I have seen a lot of people who were then harassed/cancelled being called aphobes in addition to a lot of other things like (homophobic, racist, abusive, etc) but as far as I bothered to figure out, the label of aphobe came from one specific phrase they used or one post they reblogged (though I can't be bothered to Deep Research so I genuinely don't know on this one).

(I have seen casual acephobia in my own personal life. however, that is not Tumblr.)

I have seen scores of posts along the lines of "aphobes are bad" "aphobes dni" etc etc.

Maybe it's just who I follow, but it seems like there's a lot more anti-aphobe sentiment than aphobes. Which is good! It's the goal! However, I think it's possible that that anti-aphobe sentiment has not become "look how few aphobes there are! yay!" it's "there are hidden aphobes all around us and you have to interrogate everyone to know who to ostracize"

You're a fairly popular figure in the mechs/tma fandoms and the thing about Tumblr is that it hates popular figures. And more than that, you're visible, so a) people will see if you answer a bunch of questions about ace things, and b) you exist in everyone's brains more than little blogs.

to be clear. to be absolutely crystal 100% clear: I am not saying that people got together and went "let's interrogate all the popular blogs so we can pretend theyre acephobic and have fun bullying people," I'm saying it's possible that what was once a positive emotion, "we don't tolerate intolerant people" has possibly, in some people, morphed into a fear that intolerant people are hiding all around them. And frankly, that fear can be understandable (not right, not kind, but understandable), especially if they face hate irl and their only outlet for emotion is tumblr. shit, Tumblr is one of my emotional outlets.

I don't think it's bad to engage with these people in good faith, or to answer questions, but I think it's possible that some of them are coming from the "intolerant people are hiding all around us and must be ferreted out" kind of perspective instead of a "hey I wanna check that this person isn't an intolerant asshole before following/supporting them" or "I want to engage with a person who may be ignorant" (I'm not attempting to imply that you're ignorant). Im not saying "not answer their questions" this is just, like, my opinion. I'm not making a lot of actionable statements here.

that's my whole Hot Take, hopefully I made some kind of sense, I just honestly feel kind of mad on your behalf that you have to go thru an interrogation to be Not Tumblr Cancelled. If people were generally having a nuanced discussion then that would be fine but you've already stated several times that ace/aspec people are valid and deserve love and respect etc etc. which as an aspec person makes me feel that your blog is safe for me, and I don't feel the need to play 20 Questions Are You Sure You Aren't An Aphobe

I don't know how much of this I entirely agree with and I refuse to think

(not about this. just in general. today I refuse to think)

my main response to this is:

a) I think my confusion is I have less than 1500 followers I think I always assumed the You Are Now A Public Figure People Have Opinions On mark had to be higher than that but this appears to have been a totally incorrect assumption

b) I don't feel like. a threat of Cancellation except inasmuch as I don't want Kofi to eventually get any kind of kickback if I turn out to be or people understand me to be a shitty person. I didn't ask for a platform or do anything to deserve it, if I get distressed it's largely just that I don't want to be a shitty person! and I have a whole thing about. I don't ever feel secure in my ability to say I'm NOT being shitty so like if enough people start saying AH RUTH THEDREADVAMPY IS A GARBAGE PERSON I definitely do stay wondering if they're right even if I think my position is morally defensible. like I'm very easy to get into a spiral of I think that's highly defensible but maybe I'm just in denial/trying to cover my ass/self-justifying so I can avoid accountability/etc. like this is a thing and it's why I'm very uncomfortable with absolutism, a lot of my family in my experience have a phenomenal capacity for denial and for rewriting reality into something they Fully Believe despite all the evidence, and so I'm really conscious of the possibility that I'm doing that and I wouldn't. know about it. it's a really really powerful subconscious force and that's been like. a big fear point for me my whole life. that I could be being a cunt and be obviously being a cunt and be so deep in denial that it just doesn't register at all. this is like. the thing I fear most. So I DO want people to tell me if I'm being a dick because the only way I can 100% know I'm not just in denial is if I can trust people to call me in, but I really, really, really struggle with when people say I'm being a dick and I disagree, not because they're harassing me necessarily but just because it really sends me into a spiral of doubting my own ability to be sure about like, anything. at all. it's a whole unreality thing which is, uh, it's MINE to deal with, it's not something I would want to put on other people, but it very much does affect my responses and I didn't mean to write this but hey, no therapy last week and it shows.

oh also c) on reflection I don't agree that there's very little aphobia on Tumblr (although as I've said I'm not ace or aro so my opinion should hold little weight) but I do think that there's a lack of give and take, not just in aphobia stuff but also in general, in these kinds of conversations, like sometimes yeah people are actively hateful but I don't think there's any room for misunderstanding, poor phrasing, or questioning, and I understand that that's coming from a really genuine place of pain and devaluation of aro/ace experiences but I also think people jump straight to assuming active malice very fast, and often explicitly consider "actively not stating an opinion" to be an offence on the level of "actively staying a harmful opinion," which I think is unhelpful. like. we learn by listening, there are times in my life where I would have been lying at the time to agree unconditionally with something like "I think we should believe survivors" (I was a 2000s teen who hung out with 4channers) but I also was conscious of the harm that it would do to publicly debate from the perspective that No We Shouldn't Believe Survivors, so you know I waited and I listened and I thought about it and ultimately I came to a position I could say with my chest. but like. The online social more that you Have to have an opinion and I Have to hear it to prove that you have the Right opinion is. uncomfortable to me to say the least. I don't think it gives you much room to learn and improve, especially given that everything on the internet is permanent and often treated as if it forever reflects your current beliefs. like I have changed my opinions So Much since I was 16 and if someone went back through a tag on my blog to Prove My Bad Opinions they could paint pretty much any picture they wanted with 12 years of changing opinions.

anyway yeah like. no I don't fully agree with this ask but I appreciate the alternate perspective. I also did not mean to write another wall of text I'm just very much In A Brain Hole today and sometimes words Just Happen.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

comet, moon, pluto, aquila, protostar

Thank You vm

Comet- What are you currently frustrated about?

lmaooo oh you know at any given time i’m weaving this rich tapestry of continual frustrations lol.....i’d say i’m in an Upswing Period of [simmering frustration levels closer to the surface] lately too lol like earlier in the week i pushed through a day or two there more casually but then it was like ah jeez here comes the malaise. more specifically today, even just before sitting down to answer this, i emerged from the bathroom to find there was a “dog has pooped inside despite having been outside within the last 10 min” shituation, which was wonderful.....annoyed from Waking by “smh at not being able to adjust my nocturnality, still frustrated about the near success of last friday being thwarted by the dead of night hammering debacle,” & regular Antagonizing Audio issues, aka being stressed by both the [loud, alarming] type sound & the [gross textural misophonia hell] type.....earlier i was like “where is the dish sponge” (still don’t know) & went to get a new, packaged one which had been in a drawer, but that one was gone too, good that there’s no pressing need to wash dishes rn i guess.....still struggling with the “well i guess i’m trying to put myself out there Socially” attempt to find relevant public discords, being generally overwhelmed as actually talking to randos in a group is A Lot & in theory it’s like well you meet someone Specific you’d enjoy talking to & branch off from there but unfortunately you can’t just skip to that step, also i do not genuinely Expect to get to that step either way, also i am not easily finding servers in the 1st place b/c it’s like, well i talk about Interests but what am i interested in? who knows. don’t do art “seriously” enough to rly wanna discuss it much, thought abt Language Learning but one i found wants you to have a verified account lmao like, no thanks. in theory i enjoy Socializing some but in practice it is sure a trial & i have not said anything to anyone anywhere yet, just a “well, not sure what else i could do here situation,” in theory take up an In Person hobby / group to make it all easier but that’s not happening. which, i was also Frustrated remembering oh right i spent a year as measured by my personal age in 1 location, both Pandemic & other [society] problems, & speaking of Interests & Hobbies not having them, i was also >:| over something having kicked in my Math Sensibilities (aka that i like math) & wondering like, would i have enjoyed getting more into math / some particular application, who knows, same but also even more so re: other things i get the sense i’m quite Into, like learning languages & ~performing arts~, which, i at least took math / math related classes into college level courses, which is not true for those other things (took a Language Class: never, took a theatre / drama class: for 1/4 of the schoolyear in 7th grade, & prior to that, just did a scene or two of a play in english class 4th grade, & the approx decade extracurricular of ballet, which is related but of course a different thing. anyhow, annoyed that i Simply Do Not Know & hardly see opportunities to find out on the horizon, although who knows.....which is related to being frustrated about [Society] some more like, thinking about “boy how different would it be if people were guaranteed the right to Essentials For Life like housing, food, medical care, both electricity & the internet Now A Days...” like, agonizing What If there, it is all so unnecessary that It Is Like This......just now someone made an unnecessary Post lmfao thank you xkit.......oh right, i was Frustrated, with an emphasis In Aro / Ace, about Media & Life, what else is new & then, you know, musings on The Theoretical Future & One’s Personal Past that would become even more of a like, audioscape: therapy session topic, these are frustrating things. and all of this answer has been stuff i remember getting Frustrated about in the past 24 hours. Also!!! that last night i was like, i want to play scrabble, so i looked up an online game but the Computer settings are a nightmare like, as far as i could tell the Difficulty settings were mostly attuned to Average Word Length but it was like, yeah you’re playing against this opponent given this effective total familiarity with the most obscure / archaic shit in the scrabble dictionary, not even simply the like, q words / two letter words ppl might happen to know specifically for the purposes of scrabble. there was also no “new game” button?? just had to refresh the page? smh. oh lmfao! also! you Know i was frustrated thinking about Billions, the series / interest that antagonizes you, jokes on you when you hone in on the Quant where it’s like, is he just meant to be the guy who sucks, plus he’s got depression....suppose they do at least handle him w/some sympathy / nonzero Care for this Char acter, but smh at sighing about [bracing yourself for anything promising (cough riawin) to spiral into disaster one way or another, whether it turns into a joke or plot device or just something introduced / built up / demolished for ambient drama/conflict].....what else is new. the periodic cycles of Billions Thoughts lol. was just frustrated at a video’s Editing Cadence basically lmfao. i also find it grating when the word “the jab” is used in tweets re: vaccination, which i just saw, presumably in the same sort of way where i automatically dislike the phrase To Be Fair or referring to food/eating with “fill / filling” or any variants lmfao, or earnest use of the description “hearty”......some words i hate the sound of no matter what, some i hate to hear used in a particular phrase / context......need to simply stop doing things in the middle of answering this b/c it will inevitably involve Frustrations lmfaooo. oh also i was annoyed to wake up to a clear sky. where’s that overcast atmosphere

Moon- Are you currently reading any books? If so, what book(s)?

i am not, but i’ve been considering it! just inconvenient b/c a) i gotta like, choose what book/s to read, & b) i have to read via laptop, which is kind of a pain, & c) like with everything, i always tend to basically read stuff all at once, but i’m also a slow reader lmao, so it’s like, okay, i’m probably basically devoting days on end to Reading Through whatever.....

Pluto- If you could meet anyone, alive or dead, who would you meet?

another classic Fascinating Answer of “i dunno” lol, i’ve never really had a go to answer for this or anything that’s particularly leapt out.....plus re: how i tend to feel nervous with on the spot socializing, the concept of like “if you could have dinner with someone” is too much lmfao like, a waste of time, i’d simply Be Nervous my way completely through it. the only way i could think of things is like, here i go giving someone an interview, i guess, and whomst tf would i feel Prepared to talk to lmfao. relevant to interests it’s like well of course you could ask w. roland things the in depth secret jared questions, or Any questions about quant n billions, but then it’s also like, well, there’s the questions I already have an answer for lol & either you have the same answer or i have a mini monologue, not like i don’t speak in mini monologues all the time if i have something to say at all, and my Questions go like that too lmfao, a disaster already trying to ask people about pertinent Information......never able to think of things re: people who have died, i suppose there’s fun answers re: like, getting lost / unknown Historical Info......when it comes to meeting people i don’t really consider it much in advance b/c i am nervous about everything & aware that any interacting is a Challenge lmfao. whenever these things actually happen, it’s hardly always a disaster, but i’m just improvising in the end. also, i could meet people i actually know but have never met, i.e. you, who i talk to but we are Virtual & Pandemic’d & etc & so on. but i suppose that’s kind of a given lol

Aquila- Do you prefer to read books or watch movies?

i think movies are less Involved for me, like, even if it takes me 3x their runtime (or longer) to watch any videos thanks to getting distracted & stuff, still quicker than i read a book, & unless i’m watching something for the first time and/or really wanting to properly pay attention, i can do other things while putting a movie on, whereas if i’m reading that’s the One Thing i can be doing. but overall i’m like “media, what media” whichever format lol like. haven’t consumed things, don’t often think of specific works i want/plan to consume, don’t often get around to it, etc. classique.....

Protostar- Give a random fact about yourself.

speaking of classic, me struggling to recall 101 info about myself or answer not that out there Questions, but when it’s like “alright hater what are you disgruntled about now” it’s like, Deep Inhale lmfao, but [are you okay? Is Anyone].jpeg on that one as well, we are out here......uh i’m sure i’ve said it before but i’m around 5′11″? maybe 6 ft tall but that might be overdoing it. sort of Average Tall but i am always literally looking down on people lmao.....and bumping my head into a low hanging light fixture around here.....

[boldly-ho]

Another Life - Chapter 7

Fandom: What We Do in the Shadows

Pairing: Vladislav x Reader

Series Rating: M

Word Count: 2877

Chapter Summary: Viago decides you should all get along, so you go for a night out on the town with the guys to humor him.

A/N: Drunken author. Let me know if there are any glaring issues. American author. Never been to NZ. Let me know if there are any glaring issues. As always, cross posted to ao3. Posting early bc I’m still drunk and idgaf.

“Hey,” you greeted the three men who were already seated around the kitchen table. “Is Petyr coming?”

Viago hesitated. “This doesn’t really pertain to Petyr.”

You’d figured as much. When Viago asked to come down for a flat meeting, your second since moving in, you’d guessed it was about Deacon and his reluctance to do his chores. You were surprised, then, when your flatmates all turned to you and Viago spoke.

“So, Y/N, we don’t want you to feel as though we’re ganging up on you…”

Wait, what?

“Okay…”

Viago continued. “It’s just that you- and not all the time, of course, just sometimes-“

“Stop slamming the front door,” Vladislav interrupted.

Given that Viago, in his attempts to calm you, had very much worried you, you were grateful for Vladislav’s blunt approach.

“Your bedroom door, too,” Deacon added.

Viago offered you a sheepish smile, his fangs just poking out of his mouth. “Ja.”

You felt a bit embarrassed by your transgression. “Have I been waking you guys up?”

“Yes.”

“Sorry. I’ll try to be more conscious of how much force I’m using.”

Viago offered you a real smile this time. “Great! I’m glad we were able to come to an understanding.” With that, he drew a neat line through the impeccably written ‘flat meeting’ on his to do list and flipped his notebook shut.

“Right,” you said. “Uh, did this have to be a whole flat meeting though?”

Viago stared at you blankly.

“I mean, couldn’t one of you guys just have pulled me aside and asked me to close the door more quietly? Instead of having a whole production?” Despite Viago’s initial spiel, you did feel a bit ganged up on.

“I tried that!” Deacon interjected, clearly offended.

“You did?” You didn’t remember that.

“Last week. I told you that you had woken me up and to be more careful shutting the door!”

Oh, crap.

He had. To be fair, though, you had thought he was just being a jerk because he didn’t like you, and so you’d dismissed his concerns out of hand. You felt your face heat in embarrassment.

“Oh, right. Well, I, uh, didn’t realize you were serious,” you mumbled.

“What?” Vladislav asked. You could tell from his tone that he was asking because he hadn’t heard you, not because he was shocked or appalled at your words.

Still, it wasn’t helping how suddenly sheepish you felt. Attempting to speak more clearly you said, “I didn’t think it was actually an issue. I just thought you were just being particular because you don’t like me.”

Now it was Deacon’s turn to look sheepish.

“It’s fine!” You hastily tried to reassure them all. “It’s no big deal, really. I’ll be quieter during the day. And, Deacon, it’s fine. You’re always civil.” Almost always, anyway. “And it’s not like we all need to be best friends, right? Really, it’s fine.”

Looking around the table, you were met with blank stares.

Okay, then. You excused yourself and made your way upstairs to your bedroom, taking care to close the door softly behind you. You wished you could forget the last few minutes.

Only moments later, you heard a knock at the door.

“Y/N?” It was Viago.

You sighed internally before opening the door.

“Sorry about that downstairs. I hope it didn’t feel like an ambush.”

“No, of course not,” you lied.

“Good,” he responded before getting to his main point. “Why don’t you come out with us tonight?”

“Like out clubbing?”

He nodded. “Ja. With you and Deacon not really getting on, I figured we could all get to know each other better over a night out.”

Ah. So Viago was the kind of person who needed to be best friends with his flatmates. You didn’t really feel like going out tonight. You’d been up all day, whereas your flatmates have been awake for just a couple of hours. You also weren’t super excited to spend a whole evening with these guys. On the other hand, it had been a while since you went out, and it would be nice to get out of the house for something other than work or grocery shopping. Still, though, didn’t these guys actually, literally kill people when they went out? Maybe? But if you went out with them, it’s not as though they’d bring home a victim. Not someone that you had seen and interacted with. So by that logic, shouldn’t you go out?

Viago was looking at you expectantly.

“Um, okay, sure, why not?”

He grinned excitedly.

“When do we leave?” you asked.

“As soon as you’re ready.”

“Give me 15?”

Viago nodded and left, and you got ready in a heavily expedited version of your routine. You applied a coat of mascara and a layer of powder before brushing through your hair. Quite a bit more casual and simple than your usual going out look, but you hoped your go-to dress would make up for it. It was a classic black LBD, the perfect combination of slutty and classy, fitting your form in the most flattering way. Checking yourself in the mirror revealed someone who looked pretty well put together, all things considered. You pulled on the matching shoes and felt again to be sure the cross necklace was still in place before speeding downstairs.

The guys fell silent at your arrival. It was clear from Deacon’s glare and from the residual energy in the room that they had been talking about you. Viago probably hadn’t gotten the others’ permission to invite you along. Having already made up your mind to go, you traipsed out the front door and began towards the bus stop, trusting them to follow you.

The bus ride into town was silent and awkward. Your flatmates all boarded ahead of you, and the bus was crowded. Your choice of seat was narrowed down to either squeezing yourself between Viago and the wall, or sitting in a row of three with Deacon and Vladislav. Given your relationship with Deacon, one erotic dance invitation notwithstanding, and what had happened the last time you had any real interaction with Vladislav, you chose to make yourself fit in the narrow space beside Viago. As the bus began to move, you realized that choosing the clearly uncomfortable space sent an explicit message to the other two that you did not want to sit with them.

Upon exiting the bus, the four of you formed a small huddle to discuss the evening’s game plan.

“Let’s go to Boogie Wonderland,” you offered. They shot you down. “Red Square?” They again refused. “Where do you guys usually go, then?”

“We could start out at the Big Kumara,” Deacon suggested. “I’m supposed to meet Jackie, anyway.”

The other two agreed easily, so you nodded as well. You didn’t know who Jackie was, and you’d never been to the Big Kumara, but as you approached it, you realized you’d seen it before, though never given it much attention. It was more of a townie bar than a club. That might be best, though, given that you didn’t do much for hair or makeup.

You guessed that the guys must be regulars given the odd and friendly greeting by the bouncer, and how a casual “She’s with us,” from Vladislav was enough to get you the same greeting.

The bar was quiet compared to the street outside. Other than the four of you, the only people there were the two seated at a booth and the bartender. It was simultaneously too dim to see well and too bright compared to the nightclubs you were expecting. It smelled more like the wood paneling on the walls than the greasy pub food you expected they served. Oh well, this night wasn’t really about were you went. It was about spending time with your flatmates. Or at the very least, placating Viago.

“I’ll get the first round. What do you guys want?”

“No thank you.”

“I’m not really in the mood right now.”

“I’m alright.”

You laughed.

They moved to take a larger booth.

“Oh, seriously?” you asked. Who turned down free booze?

“Ja,” Viago answered. “You go ahead, though, and meet us over there,” he said, pointing.

Whatever. It saved you some money. Still, why go to a bar and not get anything to drink?

“What can I get you?” the bartender asked.

You ordered your drink, plus a plate of chips for the table. When he returned with your drink, you gave him your card and asked for a glass of water as well. With the other guys not drinking, you figured you should do your best not to get wildly drunk.

Your beverages and fries in hand, you returned to the booth to find not just your flatmates, but an unfamiliar woman, as well.

“Hi,” you greeted her. “I’m Y/N. Help yourself to some chips.”

“Hi. Jackie,” she introduced herself. “I’m an old friend of Deacon’s.” She reached across the table to shake your hand before taking a few chips.

“Nice to meet you. Can I get you a drink?” You took a sip of yours.

“No,” Deacon answered for her. “Jackie isn’t staying. We just have some things to discuss.”

His tone brokered no discussion on your part. You wondered exactly how they knew each other. The two excused themselves from the table, leaving you, Viago, and Vladislav alone.

“‘Do you guys come here a lot?”

“We know the owner,” Vladislav answered, “so we can get in even on busy nights.”

You wondered if he meant nights that the Big Kumara was busy, or nights when Te Aro in general was busy. Because it was busy out on the street, and you imagined in other bars, right now.

“That’s cool.”

You downed your drink quickly in the awkward silence that followed, and didn’t bother to excuse yourself before going up to the bar for a second.

“Same?” the bartender asked.

You nodded. “Do you know those guys?” You gestured back to your booth.

“They’re in here a lot, yeah.”

“Are they a bit… odd?”

“No odder than anyone else who frequents here.” The bartender gave you a knowing smile that you did not return.

You sighed, taking your drink and returning to the booth, where Vladislav sat alone. You really weren’t in the mood to be alone with Vladislav yet, but you didn’t have much of a choice.

“Where’s Viago?” You took a big swig of your drink.

He pointed to the back exit, where Viago stood with Deacon and Jackie. “He’s trying to convince Deacon to get on board with Red Square.”

“Red Square?” You perked up, figuratively and literally, sitting a bit straighter in the booth. You suddenly felt lighter. If you had t sped an evening with the guys, it would be better to spend it in a place less conducive to conversation and one more conducive to partying.

He laughed gently. It was warm and fuzzy.

God, you were a lightweight.

“I like your laugh.”

His smile pulled gently at the corner of his mustache, and you found yourself staring at the gap between his front teeth. “I think you’re a bit of a lightweight.”

“Am not,” you lied.

He didn’t fight you on it. “The Big Kumara isn’t really your vibe, clearly, so we’re going to go to a club.”

You downed the rest of your drink quickly, and chased it with your water. Vladislav exited the booth and stood beside you, offering you a hand up.

“Can you walk?”

“I’m barely buzzed!” you protested before taking his hand. Looking up to his face, you realized he was joking. Teasing you. “Oh, ha ha, very funny.”

When you reached the exit, Jackie had left and Viago and Deacon were waiting for you. “Red Square?” Viago asked.

You nodded too eagerly. Perhaps you were a little bit tipsy.

Red Square was a few blocks away, but you were in fact a lightweight, and your buzz was turning you into quite the chatterbox.

“Jackie seems nice.”

Deacon nodded. “She’s okay.”

“I like her hair.”

You caught Vladislav’s smirk from behind his hair. “You think I’m funny,” you accused him.

“Sometimes.”

“Red Square!” You picked up speed as you saw the club.

“Five dollar cover,” the bouncer said.

“I got it.” You offered partly out of an effort to be friendly, and partly out of laziness, as the only cash you had on you was a twenty dollar bill.

You forged ahead into the loud, dark atmosphere as your flatmates all paused at the door. “What are you guys waiting for? Come in!”

As if suddenly convinced, the three entered the club.

“This place is amazing!” Viago yelled over the music.

“You’ve never been here?”

He shook his head.

“You’ll love it!”

Viago, Deacon, and Vladislav spoke among themselves before heading towards the dance floor. You made your way to the bar, grabbing a barstool that was luckily open, and ordering a drink. You scanned the room for your friends. It was hard to see through the crowd, though, and you couldn’t quite find them.

“Hey, gorgeous.” You turned to see someone new in the seat beside you. He was very attractive. Dark curls and stunning brown eyes, with a blindingly white smile. “Can I buy you a drink?”

As if on cue, the bartender returned with your order. “Sorry,” you told him.

He didn’t seem very bothered. “What brings a girl like you here all by herself?”

This guys was 0 for 10 on originality, but you smiled in spite of yourself. Whether due to him or the nice buzz you had going on, you weren’t sure.

“I’m actually here with my flatmates.” You gestured vaguely at the dance floor. “Y/N.” You introduced yourself.

“James.” You politely shook his hand, but felt a bit silly doing so. “I’m going to order a pretzel. Want in?”

“Heck yeah.”

After a fair bit of small talk, one pretzel, and the rest of your drink, James leaned close and whispered in your ear. It was nice, intimate. But maybe too intimate? “How about I buy you that drink now?”

“No thanks. I should probably get back to my friends.” You liked James. He was friendly and attractive, and very clearly into you. But he was getting hot and heavy a little too fast, and that really wasn’t what you were here for. In fact, you were beginning to feel a bit guilty for spending the evening away from the guys, since that was the whole point of Viago inviting you along.

“Come on,” he whispered, hand moving up your thigh.

You grabbed his hand and thrust it away. “I should find my friends.”

His hand moved to your upper arm, gripping just too tightly. “Don’t be such a bitch.”

“Hey!” You looked from James over to the bartender, who was too busy at the other end of the bar to notice what was going on.

“Is this guy bothering you?” You felt a wave of relief wash over you at Deacon’s familiar voice above you and his cool hand on your shoulder.

“Who the hell are-“ James paled as he looked up at Deacon, before almost falling off of his stool in his attempt to get away.

You looked over your shoulder, but Deacon seemed normal to you. “What did you-“

“Are you okay?” Deacon asked as he took James’ seat.

“Yeah. Thank you.” You ordered another drink from the passing bartender.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” You rubbed your arm absentmindedly. “I’m glad you were here, though. Where are the other guys?” you asked.

“I’m not sure.”

You scoured the club and briefly spotted Vladislav in a small booth with two women. Two, really? You couldn’t find Viago on the dance floor or in a booth.

“Viago told me what happened with you and Vladislav the other day.”

What?

“What?”

He repeated himself. “Viago told me what happened-“

“Nothing happened!” You were quick to defend yourself.

“I know, I know. I just wanted to explain why Viago said what he said.”

You didn’t love that they had been talking about you.

“It wasn’t about you at all. Once we found out our new flatmate was a woman, before me or Vlad even saw you, we made a blanket statement that no one would hit on you. Just as general precaution to avoid trouble.”

Hit on you or murder you, you guessed.

“There was a bit of a special emphasis placed on Vlad, but that still wasn’t about you. It’s just because he’s a bit of a, uh, ladies’ man, I guess. And knowing Vlad’s history, like Viago and I do, Viago just leapt to the wrong conclusion. It was about Vladislav, not you.”

You nodded, looking back to where Vladislav sat with two women. A ladies’ man. You could see that, you supposed. He wasn’t conventionally attractive, really, but he wasn’t unappealing. And there was something about him. A magnetism of some sort. You could see why women were drawn to him.

You thought about his laugh.

“I just figured Viago and Vladislav wouldn’t say anything about it to you.”

You downed almost your entire drink in one go. “Thanks.”

Deacon nodded.

“You know doing erotic dances for your friends is weird, right?”

[queenofthecommunistcannibals]

@yikes-trademarked

i mean yeah, the post has nothing to do with it just comes across as a bit of a slap in the face to people who are genuinely oppressed in a modern day society. how are asexuals ‘neglected’ and ‘isolated’? so most people experience sexual attraction and you don’t, whoop de doo. nobody actually cares if you do or don’t experience sexual attraction. if you could please give me an actual, real life, not someone-calling-you-a-plant-online example of asexual discrimination then i’ll take back my words

___

@yikes-trademarked I super love how instead of apologizing you are doubling down. Okay. I'll give you examples. Here are some general prejudices that affect aro and ace people. They aren't in any real order.

•Until the DSM V asexuality was considered a mental illness. Despite the fact that now we are "allowed" to "identify" as asexual HSDD (Hypoactive sexual desire disorder) is STILL considered a disorder. So instead of trying to help a person accept themselves as asexual allosexual (nonace) doctors will try to "fix" someone if they want to. Asexuality is still seen as something to be cured. It is still a dysfunction in their eyes, they just hide their prejudice a little better.

•Asexuals have been harrassed and raped in an attempt to fix them. Asexuals and aromantics are often seen as a "challenge" to be harassed into affection.

•Mainstream Christianity discriminates against asexuals as they do other queer identities. Here is one quote from a document called "Asexuality and Christianity" produced for Asexual Awareness Week (the fact that we get "awareness" rather than "pride" ain't great either)

"While celibacy is officially considered a good stance in religion, declaring oneself disinterested in sex is often met with disapproval. Asexuals have been told that they are rejecting God's gift of sexuality, that they are just as bad as homosexuals because they are not 'normal'...or people decide to pray to God for them to be fixed or for the Almighty to send the right person for them to fall in love with."

Or from the horse's mouth "Question: What do you call a person who is asexual? Answer: Not a person. Asexual people do not exist. Sexuality is a gift from God and thus a fundamental part of our human identity. Those who repress their sexuality are not living as God created them to be: fully alive and well." This was written by two Jesuit priests David Nantais and Scott Opperman. In other religions this is also often true. I know more about Christianity personally but I know similar doctrines exist in Islam and Orthodox Judaism. Not to mention the notion that marriage is the only acceptable option in these religions (unless you are Catholic clergy) and children are a necessity. Hell, according to the conservative traditional gender roles of these religions even an otherwise gender conforming aro/ace doesn't fit (not marrying, no kids, no family, all that).

•Dehumanization from all sides. We are told to be human is to love and that love is nearly always put in romantic or sexual context. Indeed NOT being capable of or experiencing romantic or sexual love is often used as shorthand for someone being a bad person (As Dexter [from Dexter], for example, becomes more sympathetic he develops the ability to feel sexual/romantic love. Robots in fiction can be asexual and aromantic but only if you want to show them as apart from humanity. Once you want to make it clear they have a soul they have to experience some kind of romantic urge or longing. Like Data from Star Trek) An article in Psychology Today by Dr. Gordon Hodson Ph.D. (who specializes in studying dehumanization) postulates (with a study to back it up) that asexuals are the most dehumanized sexual minority.

•On the specifically romantic asexual front in many places do not consider a marriage valid until it has been consumated.

•In media in which asexuality and aromanticism are not proof of evil they are judged to be not real. Here is one of if not our first actual representation in media. In the film Nymphomaniac the SELF-PROCLAIMED asexual character turns out to be a rapist who the protagonist murders in what is supposed to be a "woo! You go girl!" moment. AT BEST this says asexuals aren't real. We're just sexually repressed misanthropes. It might also imply that asexuals are base animals who are waiting to strike. THAT IS ONE OF THE FEW TIMES THE WORD ASEXUAL IS EVEN USED IN MAINSTREAM FILM! I cannot think of a single other.

•We are erased constantly in real life and in media. Here are two examples of active erasure, Jughead Jones (canonly aro/ace in the comics and coded as such since day one) was straight-washed for Riverdale. You may say "oh maybe they didn't know" (which is bullshit) then consider example two: Sherlock Holmes. Holmes (who I adore) has long been one of the few characters that has been "allowed" to aro/aces, but when the creators of BBC's Sherlock were explicitly asked if he was aro/ace they said he absolutely wasn't.

This is part of what I am talking about. We are not allowed to exist. We are invisible.

•Asexuals and aromantics are somehow toxic in our mere existence. We make kids think it is okay to be like us and are poisoning their young minds. We hate sex and thus are against the sex positivity movement.

•"Virgin" is an insult and we are treated as constant children. Somehow we have failed to grow up and cannot be treated as adults.

•And here is what I was really talking about SOCIETY IS NOT MADE FOR US! CULTURE IS NOT CONDUSIVE TO OUR EXISTENCES! I didn't know asexuality was an option until I was about 24. And before that I, like many aro/ace people, put myself in a lot of situations and relationships to "fix" myself. To make myself normal. My first and only sexual encounter was one of the things that sent me spiralling into a serious depression. I didn't know that it was okay to not be interested and to say "no.". So I said "okay" because I thought it was what I had to do to be a normal teenager. I don't know if I ever shared that online before so congrats you got me so mad I revisited my personal trauma. From childhood we are told falling in love is the ultimate reward. As teens we are told we gotta get laaaaaid. As adults not being involved in a sexual/romantic (often indistinguishable) relationship is WEIRD and TROUBLING. I have been told by people who don't know I am asexual that asexual people are "too weird" or even "creepy." The idea that someone might not be capable of romantic love sets off people's red flags that said aromantic might be crazy.

•We are surrounded by sex and romance constantly. Constantly. It is inescapable. In your real life I want you to pay attention to romantic or sexual imagry and storylines around you. There is no break. No alternative. This is what I mean by "invisible at best."

•Also, we are denied a history. It is very hard to prove absence but often sexless figures are immediately dubbed to be gay/lesbian because of their lack of interest in "appropriate" gender. Forgetting entirely that asexuality and aromanticism are options. Then when the question is raised they maybe a figure WAS aro and/or ace we are told that we are """"stealing"""" history. There is like one person in history we are allowed: Nikola Tesla. I love him very much, but he also fits the bill as a weirdo asexual. Because anyone who was the least bit acceptable to society must be allosexual. An example in reverse, Queen Elizabeth I, Britain's most beloved monarch, who never married, never was romantically or sexually involved with anyone (aside from being assaulted as a teenager), and was in her era very famously THE VIRGIN QUEEN who used her virginity as part of her persona to great affect. She is not considered asexual or aromantic and never has been. I have seen a biographer bend over backwards to get away from that accusation including using an incident where an elderly Elizabeth flashed a dignitary to make him uncomfortable as proof that she was allo. We can't have this awesome historical figure be one of those creeps right?!

•i am not even going into the history of how "sexlessness" was historically treated, especially in women. Let me just say that "spinsterism" was considered a danger to children and young women.

•NOTICE I WENT THIS WHOLE POST WITHOUT MENTIONING ASSHOLES WHO USE THE DISK HORSE AND BAR US FROM QUEER CIRCLES EVEN THOUGH SOME STUDIES FIND ASEXUALS HAVE LOWER SELF ESTEEM THAN ANY OTHER QUEER GROUP AND WOULD REALLY BENEFIT FROM A COMMUNITY!! THIS POST IS ENTIRELY EXAMPLES OF NON ONLINE PEOPLE BECAUSE SOMEHOW YOUR CONSTANT ABUSE OR REFUSAL TO RECOGNIZE ABUSE IS A-OKAY BECAUSE IT IS PART OF "THE DEBATE" BECAUSE SOMEHOW OUR EXISTENCE IS ACCEPTABLE DEBATE!

These are just some examples. People are free to add more but I am tired. If you want links I will dig them up.

Sincerely,

Fuck you.

I apologize for the "fuck you" but the exclusionist attitude is so disheartening. It is bad for not only aros and aces but also the queer community in general. We should be in this together! Fighting for one another side by side! We should be there for each other for hardships and for celebrations. I think it is vital that exclusionists really examine what and who they are actually fighting against.