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nvmadic · 1 year

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GUILT AND SHAME - 03

link to last part: [x] synopsis: after a messy dispute revolving around your toxic boyfriend, schlatt takes matters into his own hands and puts your safety over his. some feelings are unearthed that need dealing with. words: 5,728 warnings: mild language

Like the gentle rays of dawn piercing through the darkness, a sense of normalcy began to weave its way back into the fabric of your life. The heavy clouds of despair and torment that once shrouded your mind had gradually dissipated, making way for a glimmer of hope and a renewed sense of purpose. In the weeks that followed, you dedicated yourself to the sacred art of self-care, tending to the neglected corners of your soul with tenderness and compassion.

Each day, as the sun rose on the horizon, you found yourself embracing the beauty of simple moments and cherishing the connections that enriched your existence. The weight of past sorrows began to lift, replaced by an effervescent optimism that breathed new life into your spirit. In the warmth of laughter shared with loved ones, the comfort of conversations held with friends, and even in the stolen moments treasured with Schlatt amidst his demanding schedule over the past couple of weeks, you discovered a resounding joy that anchored you in the present.

Ted's living room transformed into a cosy haven as laughter and excitement filled the air. Soft ambient lighting from stringed fairy lights cast a warm glow. Plush cushions and blankets were scattered across the spacious couches, providing a comfortable and relaxed seating arrangement. The coffee table at the centre bore the remnants of the evening's indulgence. An assortment of snacks, once neatly arranged, now lay in delightful disarray, their packaging discarded and crumbs scattered across the surface.

It was game night, a bimonthly event that Ted graciously hosted and you would always look forward to attending. However, as you reflect on the past, you recall that being present on these nights was not always a given. It hinged on the whims of your now ex-boyfriend, who would occasionally grant permission for you to participate.

Laughter and the lively banter of competition filled the room, creating a vibrant soundtrack to the evening's gathering. Seated comfortably among friends, you observed the digital mayhem unfolding on the screen. The characters in Quiplash's Trivia Murder Party met their untimely death one by one, eliciting a symphony of both victorious cheers and exasperated groans. Amidst the chaos and banter, you bided your time, eagerly awaiting your chance at redemption during the final round. Though your character had met an early demise to a whimsical and ridiculously niche question, you relished in the role of the quiet spectator.

"Guys, I promise I hit the wrong button, I totally knew the answer to that," Ted chirped, his voice laced with mock frustration, as he admitted defeat. Slumping back into the couch, he watched with a mixture of amusement and resignation as his character transformed into a ghost on the screen.

"You fuckin' idiot, you owe me 100 bucks," Schlatt retorted playfully, his voice infused with a mischievous tone. A slightly manic chuckle escaped his lips as he took a sip from the remnants of his drink, his eyes fixed on the screen where his character remained untouched. You strained to catch Ted's witty comeback, his words barely audible as he mumbled in disbelief, shaking his head with a mix of amusement and frustration. The raucous laughter and ongoing game banter created a boisterous backdrop, making it difficult to discern individual voices.

Seated a few seats away from you, Schlatt played his role in the game with enthusiasm, but his attention frequently shifted to steal affectionate glances in your direction. His eyes sought yours, silently checking in on you throughout the night, his gaze filled with a tender mix of care and adoration. Each time your eyes met, a knowing smile would grace his lips, wordlessly assuring you of his presence and his desire to make sure you were enjoying yourself. The subtle exchange of glances served as a quiet language of affection, a private connection amongst the joyful chaos of the game night.

Whether they had witnessed the events firsthand or heard the accounts through word of mouth, news of Schlatt's act of defence at the party was a repetitive whispered discussion among friends and acquaintances. To everyone's understanding, Schlatt's intervention was seen as an act of harmless friendship. They empathized with his instinct to protect you, firmly believing that they, too, would have done the same in his position. As a result of this, there was no suspicion.

Amidst the uproar of laughter and animated game-playing, you and Schlatt revelled in the secrecy of your budding connection. Hidden from the prying eyes of your friends, every stolen moment became a thrill, an exciting secret shared between just the two of you. A gentle graze of hands under the guise of passing snacks, leaning in closely to hear him over the loud conversations — these clandestine gestures carried a charge of excitement, intensifying the connection you shared.

The final round burst onto the screen, captivating everyone's attention as the avatars lined up on the left side, a sea of ghosts outnumbering the few remaining living characters. Schlatt, Shae, and Charlie were granted a head start, their expertise or uncanny luck propelling them forward in the game. The game commenced with startling quickness, pacing through rounds as the darkness chased your characters, teasing them with a final demise.

"How the fuck do you know that cirrostratus is a cloud? You're cheating, you asshole!" Schlatt exclaimed, a mixture of jest and genuine bewilderment in his voice, as you were the only one who correctly answered the question. You couldn't help but chuckle at his reaction, the excitement and mild panic evident in his tone as he leaned forward, fully engaged in the game. Laughter and jovial banter filled the room as the final round of the game unfolded. The questions became increasingly tricky, leaving everyone second-guessing their answers to the multiple-choice questions and engaging in animated discussions to decipher the correct responses.

Caught in the corner of your eye, you witnessed Ted leaning in close to Shae, their heads almost touching as he whispered something in her ear. The sudden realization struck you, and without a second thought, you blurted out, "Ted and Shae are cheating!" The room fell into a momentary silence as all eyes turned towards the two culprits, their faces displaying a mix of surprise and guilt.

Amidst the rapid-fire pace of the questions and the ominous sound effects of characters being devoured by the darkness, the tension in the room escalated rapidly. The once jovial atmosphere transformed into a frenzy of shouting, lighthearted insults, and playful accusations. The room seemed to reverberate with the chaotic symphony of voices as everyone scrambled to defend themselves or point fingers at others. The overwhelming mix of laughter, frustration, and excitement created intense and electric energy, filling the air with an electrifying buzz.

Amidst the whirlwind of accusations and laughter, your gaze fixated on Ted, who seemed to be experiencing a fit of uncontrollable mirth. His eyes squinted with a mixture of amusement and disbelief, reflecting the absurdity of the situation. He clutched his stomach as if trying to contain the explosion of laughter within him, while his body swayed back and forth in the chair. Ted's gasps for air blended with the chorus of chaotic voices, punctuating the room with his boisterous laughter. It was evident that he struggled to comprehend Charlie's audacious attempt to Google the questions and provide answers within the limited time frame.

Giggles escaped from Charlie's lips, his eyes gleaming with mischief and self-awareness. He seemed to find immense joy in the absurdity of his situation as if relishing in the comical futility of trying to beat the game through an impromptu Google search. He would frantically type a few letters into the search bar, fully aware of the futility of his actions before the timer mercilessly expired.

"Fuck!" Schlatt's exclamation filled the air, laced with a mixture of annoyance and amusement. His eyes widened with a tinge of frustration as he helplessly witnessed his digital avatar succumb to the encroaching darkness, vanishing into the abyss. With a lighthearted yet exasperated gesture, he tossed his phone onto the nearby coffee table, a playful act of defeat.

With an exasperated yet endearing sigh, Schlatt's hand migrated to his face, cupping his chin in a gesture of frustration mixed with contemplation. His fingertips delicately traced along his stubble-covered jawline, the subtle pressure of his touch revealing the weight of his annoyance. But as his gaze found yours, a transformation took place. The frustration in his expression gave way to a glimmer of amusement, mingling with the undercurrent of affection that had been simmering between you. A playful smile tugged at the corners of his lips as if he couldn't help but find the situation somewhat amusing. And in that instant, you couldn't help but mirror his smile, the shared joy and connection bridging the gap between you.

The intensity of the moment seemed to suspend time. The raucous laughter and competitive banter gradually faded into the background, replaced by a hushed silence that enveloped the space. But as the final round came to an end and the game declared Shae as the victor, the room erupted once more in a mixture of applause and playful groans. The spell was broken, and reality reasserted itself with a jolt. You tore your gaze away from Schlatt's, momentarily disoriented by the sudden shift in focus. The cheers and sighs of defeat reverberated in the air, a symphony of emotions that filled the room. Shae, with a triumphant grin, basked in the adulation of her victory, while the others playfully lamented their defeat.

The night carried on, the group embarking on a few more rounds of thrilling competition. Amidst the laughter and friendly banter, Ted found himself at the centre of attention, batting away playful allegations of cheating with an exasperated grin. His attempts to secure an advantage whenever Shae wasn't entwined in his arms became a running joke, fueling the teasing and lighthearted taunting from the others.

Charlie, with his mischievous and carefree demeanour, couldn't resist stirring the pot every now and then. He delighted in provoking Ted with false accusations, adding an extra layer of amusement to the already charged atmosphere. Like a mischievous instigator, Charlie revelled in the chaos he sowed, knowing that it would only serve to heighten the excitement and keep the game night lively. And at the heart of it all was Schlatt, a charismatic presence that effortlessly commanded attention. With a mischievous glint in his eyes, Schlatt relished the opportunity to add fuel to the fire of Charlie's remarks. His sharp tongue and quick wit were unleashed, delivering witty insults that targeted not only Ted but also anyone he suspected of foul play

A playful yet endearing smile adorned Schlatt's smug face whenever he would throw a playful insult your way, his soft brown eyes gazing at you with a contradictory blend of warmth and mischief. You couldn't deny the longing that simmered within you throughout the night, silently yearning to find solace beneath Schlatt's protective embrace, to feel the gentle strength of his arm wrapped around you, and to be held in the tender grip of his affection. Yet, despite the undeniable pull between you, the timing and circumstances kept you both suspended in a dance of anticipation and restraint.

As the night gracefully approached its end, the exuberance that had animated the room gradually faded, replaced by a prevailing weariness that settled upon each person present. The infectious laughter that had resonated through the space was now muted, giving way to soft murmurs and the occasional yawn. Aware of the challenge posed by finding suitable accommodations in the unfamiliar locale, Ted kindly extended an invitation for everyone to find refuge in his home.

As the group dispersed, seeking rest and respite in different corners of the house, the once bustling room gradually grew quieter. The distant sound of water flowing and the gentle rhythm of toothbrush bristles against enamel permeated the air, a soothing melody that signalled the winding down of the evening. Amidst the hushed symphony of bedtime preparations, your gaze instinctively shifted towards Schlatt, seemingly a part of the furniture itself, his body sinking into the cushions as weariness settled upon him. His eyes, slightly swollen with the weight of sleepiness, reflected the strain of the long day and the unspoken desire for a peaceful slumber. With a slow and deliberate movement, Schlatt rolled his head in your direction, his eyes heavy with sleep. Through their drooping lids, he gazed at you, his gaze filled with a mixture of tenderness and drowsiness. The dim lighting cast a soft glow upon his features, highlighting the rugged contours of his face.

Amidst the preparations for sleep, Ted, with a warm smile, bid everyone a good night. He quietly ascended the stairs, his steps light and deliberate, accompanied by the soft murmur of conversation as he and Shae retreated to their own private sanctuary on the upper floor. Their laughter, now softened, floated down from the higher realm, a gentle reminder of their presence and the intimacy they shared.

With a weary stride, Charlie made his way back into the lounge, his fatigue evident in every step. Sensing that it was now time to prepare for sleep, you took it as a subtle cue to follow suit. Casting a fleeting glance towards the bathroom, from which Charlie had just emerged, you rose from your seat and made your way towards the doorway. The bathroom door stood ajar, inviting you in with its faint glow of soft light. Stepping inside, you were greeted by the lingering scent of fresh soap and the remnants of Charlie's presence. The room exuded a sense of quiet intimacy, its tiled walls reflecting the warm illumination of the small overhead light.

As you diligently brushed your teeth, your gaze caught a flicker of movement in the bathroom doorway. Glancing at the mirror, you observed Schlatt's silhouette as he entered the room, his tall and commanding figure instantly commanding attention. The mirror acted as a portal, offering you a glimpse into his world as his broad reflection seemed to fill the entire frame. Schlatt moved with languid grace, his steps deliberate and unhurried. Clutching a toiletry bag in his hand, he exuded an air of quiet confidence, his presence filling the space around him. The bathroom seemed to shrink in comparison to his stature as if acknowledging his ability to effortlessly command any room he entered.

Awe washed over you as you watched Schlatt's reflection in the mirror. The soft illumination cast delicate shadows that danced across his features, emphasizing the graceful contours and gentle lines of his face. His eyes, still tinged with sleepiness, radiated a warm glimmer as they connected with yours in the mirror's reflection. In a wordless understanding, he stood behind you with just enough breathing room between you both, calmly reaching for his toothbrush and mirroring your actions. As you continued to brush your teeth, your gazes repeatedly caught and held, a mix of nervousness and anticipation flickering between you before each of you shyly looked away.

Amidst the not-so-subtle glances and the occasional, inconspicuous touches, an undeniable desire for a private moment had steadily built between you. The weight of unspoken words and unexplored emotions hung in the air, creating a palpable tension that seemed to beckon for a moment of solitude and intimacy. In that tender moment, Schlatt's free hand reached out towards you in a timid yet alluring gesture. His fingertips brushed against the side of your waist, leaving a trail of gentle warmth in their wake. His eyes, filled with a mix of longing and anticipation, remained locked with yours through the mirror, conveying a silent invitation for you to reciprocate the touch. Responding to Schlatt's subtle invitation, you mirrored his gesture with a tender yet purposeful motion. Your hand gracefully moved, guided by an invisible force, until it found its rightful place, nestled against his.

As your hands intertwined, you couldn't help but be reminded of the exquisite softness of Schlatt's touch. His palms, larger and stronger than yours, enveloped your hand with a comforting warmth. The contrast between his fingers and yours was evident, his touch gentle and deliberate as if he feared tarnishing the delicate canvas of your skin. In his exploration, his fingertips danced across your flesh, leaving a trail of electrifying sensations in their wake. You luxuriated in the tender caress of his touch for a blissful minute or two, relishing the intimate connection that thrived in those stolen moments. The rhythmic sound of brushing teeth persisted in the background, serving as a backdrop to the unspoken emotions that hung in the air.

With synchronized movements, you and Schlatt instinctively put away your toothbrushes. You could feel Schlatt's presence behind you, his towering figure casting a comforting shadow over your form. With a gentle squeeze of your hand, you both reluctantly released each other's grasp, the connection fading but leaving an electric pulse in its wake.

With a slight hesitation, you turned to face him. The strain of sleep was evident in the subtle furrows of his brow and the repeated slow blinks as if trying to clear his vision and fully awaken. His gaze, however, held a captivating intensity as it wandered over his own reflection, his eyes searching for imperfections that only he seemed to see. But then, like a magnet drawn to its polar opposite, his attention returned to you.

The room was immersed in serene stillness, the weight of unspoken words hanging in the air. A mixture of nerves and excitement churned in the pit of your stomach, causing a gentle swirl of emotions. Your gaze fixated on Schlatt's eyes, capturing every intricate detail that had previously eluded your attention. As you stared deeply into the depths of his irises, you were captivated by the newfound realization of tiny flecks of yellow and green that danced within the sea of his eyes. Upon further inspection, you were taken aback by the discovery of something you had never noticed before the remarkable length of Schlatt's eyelashes. They gracefully framed his eyes, casting delicate shadows as they fluttered with each blink.

With a bold yet tender touch, Schlatt's hand found its place on your waist, gently pulling you closer to him. The gap of air that had lingered between you dissipated as your bodies came into intimate contact. His lips, warm and eager, met yours in a passionate kiss, melding together in a breathtaking union of desire. As your lips moved in a synchronized dance, a faint tickle grazed your skin, and the sensation of his facial hair brushed against your upper lip. In the midst of this, your senses became heightened, every touch and every sensation magnified. You could feel the gentle pressure of his hand on your waist, anchoring you closer to him, as if he never wanted to let go. The taste of his lips, a perfect blend of warmth and mintiness, left an indelible mark on your senses. Your heart raced, its rhythm matching the intensity of the moment, as you surrendered to the magnetic pull drawing you deeper into him.

The air between you two hummed with a potent mix of desire and uncertainty. Schlatt's fingertips twitched, hovering in the space between your bodies, caught between the longing to explore further and the need to respect your boundaries. It was a tender dance of restraint and eagerness. As you reluctantly pulled away, the need for a shared breath became undeniable, your chests rose and fell in synchrony. In the midst of the comfortable silence, a faint shuffle of approaching steps broke the stillness. Both of you instinctively sensed the need to separate, to create the illusion of normalcy as if nothing had transpired between you.

You exchanged a quick, knowing glance, silently communicating your mutual understanding. With practised ease, you moved apart, adjusting your postures and composing yourselves. As the approaching figure came into view, your expressions regained their composure, masks of nonchalance slipping into place. You continued as if the charged encounter had never taken place, seamlessly blending into the facade of casual conversation and everyday gestures.

"I forgot my bag," Charlie tiredly announced, his footsteps sounding sluggish as he shuffled past the two of you. His eyes, heavy with weariness, glanced briefly in your direction before he continued on his way. And just as quickly as he entered, he left.

You and Schlatt exchanged a brief, amused glance, a shared understanding passing between you. With a mutual unspoken agreement, you both made your way back to the lounge, finding separate spots to settle down in. The comfort of the couch embraced Schlatt's tall frame as he sank into its familiar cushions, while you nestled into the other couch. The room was bathed in a soft glow, casting gentle shadows that danced along the walls, creating an intimate atmosphere. With a quiet and almost slurred voice, Charlie bid you both goodnight as he settled into his makeshift bed on the floor. Charlie's exhaustion was evident in his demeanour, his words trailing off as if he were battling a severe sleep deficit. In response, you and Schlatt offered him an asynchronous reply, murmuring a soft "good night" before settling in your respective spots to sleep. The weariness of the night's activities began to take hold, and the room embraced silence as a peaceful slumber beckoned to all who occupied it.

The transition from wakefulness to slumber was seamless, the weariness gradually overtaking your body without you even realizing how heavy your eyelids had become. As you closed your eyes, your mind became a swirling vortex of thoughts, memories, and fleeting images. Among them, the presence of your ex-boyfriend occasionally made an unwelcome appearance, his face haunting the depths of your subconscious. The remnants of past experiences, both good and bad, seemed to intertwine with the present, creating a complex tapestry of emotions that accompanied you into the realm of dreams. Yet, despite these intermittent intrusions, sleep began to claim you, pulling you further away from the conscious world and into the enigmatic realm of slumber.

Within the realm of dreams, the boundaries of reality blurred and time lost its hold. You found yourself drifting through fragmented scenes and surreal landscapes as if traversing the vast expanse of your own subconscious. Memories and emotions intertwined, creating a vivid amalgamation of experiences that played out like a montage of fleeting moments. Amidst the chaos, the image of your ex-boyfriend persisted, his presence both a reminder of past love and a lingering ghost of unresolved feelings.

You jolted awake. Pulled from the depths of sleep, your eyes snapped open to the encompassing darkness. The silence enveloped you, broken only by the faint and muffled sounds of distant snores. As your eyes gradually adjusted to the darkness, they wandered across the room, taking in the sight of everyone peacefully asleep. Charlie, facing the wall, radiated an aura of tranquillity, his body barely stirring as he breathed in a rhythmic pattern. The serenity that emanated from him was palpable, creating a serene atmosphere within the room. To your left, Schlatt lay sprawled on the couch beside you, his form relaxed and at ease. His arm folded, cradling his head like a makeshift pillow, adding a casual air to his slumber. With closed eyes and a content expression, he emitted a gentle snore, so soft that it blended seamlessly with the quiet stillness of the room. His lips, ever so slightly parted, allowed the softest of breaths to escape. Despite his relaxed appearance, there was a hint of lingering frustration etched on Schlatt's features, even in the depths of his slumber. His brow furrowed ever so slightly, creating a subtle tension that contrasted with the tranquillity of his rest. It was as if his resting face couldn't fully escape the remnants of the emotions that often accompanied him during wakefulness.

Lying in the embrace of silence, your mind raced with a torrent of qualms, each one vying for your attention. As the quiet night enveloped you, a subtle unease gnawed at the edges of your consciousness, leaving you to question whether your subconscious was trying to convey a message. It pained you to entertain such thoughts, to doubt the choices you had made, but a small part of you couldn't help but wonder if you had made the right decision. Amidst the stillness, a twinge of doubt crept into your thoughts. You couldn't deny the fondness you felt for Schlatt, but a small voice within you questioned if it was merely a temporary infatuation, fueled by his protective nature. It was true that you hadn't seen him in this light before, not until after ending your relationship with your now ex-boyfriend. The realization troubled you, as you feared that you might unintentionally lead him on, only to have the fleeting euphoria fade away. The fear of leading him on and the guilt of acting too hastily weighed heavily upon you.

Despite the uncertainties swirling in your mind, you held onto the knowledge that Schlatt possessed an understanding nature. You were confident that if you decided to take a step back and cool things off, he would respect your choice. But deep down, you didn't want to push him away completely. There was a part of you that genuinely enjoyed his company, his presence bringing a sense of comfort and joy that you hadn't had the pleasure of feeling for a while. Yet, you were aware that you could inevitably string him along, knowing the potential pain it could cause both of you in the long run.

Regardless of the intricacies and uncertainties that lay ahead, one thing remained clear: honesty was paramount between you and Schlatt. The bond you shared deserved the foundation of truth, even if it meant facing uncomfortable conversations and challenging moments. As the weight of your thoughts grew heavier, lulling you into a state of exhaustion, you surrendered to the gentle embrace of slumber. The worries and uncertainties that had plagued your mind slowly faded into the background, replaced by the tranquillity of dreams. The rhythmic cadence of your breathing accompanied the silence of the night, carrying you away into a realm untouched by conscious thought.

Hours stealthily slipped away, carried by the ebb and flow of your breath, as your consciousness embarked on its nocturnal journey. Thoughts danced amidst the vast horizon of your mind, intertwining with fantasies, memories, and desires. And as the rays of sunlight painted the horizon and brazenly shone through the window, a gentle stirring pulled you back to wakefulness.

As your eyes gradually blinked open, the world came into focus, revealing a scene brimming with hushed conversations and the delicate rustling of people moving about. The ambiance of the morning amplified the otherwise muted sounds, enveloping the space with a serene stillness. Your gaze lazily wandered across the room, taking in the transformation that had occurred while you slumbered. The spots that were once filled with lively company mere hours ago now appeared vacant and meticulously organized, as if all traces of leisure and relaxation had been erased.

Gradually awakening from your slumber, the soft murmurs of conversation began to seep into your consciousness. The hushed tones indicated a deliberate effort to maintain a peaceful ambiance, as if those around you were cautious not to disrupt your rest.

As your senses sharpened, you became aware of the gentle clinking of silverware against ceramic, a symphony of muted percussion accompanying the subdued conversations. The rhythmic sound indicated that breakfast was in full swing, and it seemed that everyone else was awake.

With a cautious movement, you sat yourself up, your eyes scanning the kitchen where a subtle sense of activity lingered. The hushed shuffling of your own movement seemed to have caught the attention of those present. Everyone offered their quiet and sincere "good mornings," before a commanding voice spoke.

"I never thought you were going to wake up," Schlatt deadpanned, his voice cutting through the morning silence. He brought a piece of toast to his mouth, the audible crunch resonating in the air as he took a bite.

With a brief eye-roll laced with a hint of amusement, though overshadowed by your grogginess, you stretched your legs and rose from your seat. Making your way to the bathroom, you sought to freshen up and shake off the remnants of sleep that clung to your senses. As the warm water cascaded over your body, soothing and revitalizing your senses, your mind couldn't help but wander back to the thoughts from last night that you had hoped to keep at bay. Despite your efforts to push them aside, they persistently resurfaced, mingling with the steam and echoing in the corners of your mind.

Eventually stepping out into the brisk air, you dried yourself off and got dressed, going about the nuances off brushing your teeth, drying your hair and freshening up your appearance for the day.

Returning to the lounge, you anticipated finding the space empty, with everyone having dispersed to attend to their own morning activities. However, to your surprise, the familiar faces of your friends were still gathered in the kitchen. They sat in a comfortable huddle, engrossed in easy conversation, their laughter filling the air.

With a groggy demeanor, you made your way toward the lively commotion in the kitchen. Schlatt's eyes met yours, and a warm, affectionate smile graced his lips. However, his observant gaze seemed to catch onto the turmoil hiding beneath the surface of your expression. Schlatt's expression turned contemplative, a hint of surprise playing on his features as he observed you. Without a word, he pulled out a seat beside him, a silent invitation to join him in the midst of the gathered company. As you settled into the seat, Ted approached with a cup of steaming coffee, offering it to you with a warm smile as he asked if how you slept.

Sinking into the chair replying to Ted's sincere questions, you became acutely aware of Schlatt's gaze fixed upon you. The weight of his scrutiny bore into the side of your head.

"Not a morning person?" Charlie asked innocently with a sincere smile, and a light hearted chuckle as he finished the remains of his breakfast. He was quick to discern your waning enthusiasm for the day.

With a simple shake of your head, you mustered a weary smile and raised the coffee mug to your lips. The warmth enveloped your senses and the rich aroma filled the air. In the midst of the continual chatter among your friends, you found yourself sinking into a quiet space of introspection. As you nibbled on the breakfast provided by Ted, the voices around you seemed to blend into a distant hum, their words passing through your ears without fully registering in your mind.

Having relished every interaction with Schlatt the previous night and noticing the subtle glimmer of excitement in his eyes when he saw your tired state this morning, a wave of guilt washed over you. You couldn't shake off the feeling that it would be unfair to burden him with the inner turmoil that plagued your thoughts. The tender moments shared, the affectionate gestures exchanged—they held a certain promise and hope that you were hesitant to disrupt.

"I'm taking Charlie to the airport, I'll be back in a bit," Ted declared, the jingle of keys punctuating his words. As you exchanged farewells, their departure left a void, and the echo of the closing door intensified the stillness that settled between you and Schlatt. The atmosphere grew dense with an unspoken tension, engulfing the room in a palpable silence that seemed to stretch endlessly.

"Everything okay?" Schlatt's voice carried a tenderness, laced with genuine concern, as he broke the silence. He sensed that your detached state and absent-mindedness went beyond your disdain for mornings. Words clamored for release, desperate to spill forth from your lips, but despite your best efforts, silence clung to your tongue. You mustered a nonchalant shrug, your shoulders lifting in a half-hearted attempt to dismiss the weight of your thoughts. Avoiding his compelling gaze, you shifted your focus to a point on the table, feigning indifference.

He sat patiently, his eyes fixed on you, understanding the struggle that consumed your thoughts. The weight of your uncertainty hung heavy in the air as you gathered the courage to articulate your qualms. With a hesitant pause, your voice emerged, its timbre lacking conviction and volume, as you admitted, "I'm just... unsure."

You braced yourself for the unknown, unsure of how he would react or what emotions would surface on his face. As your eyes met his, you searched for any sign of his true feelings, but his expression remained inscrutable, betraying no hints of his inner thoughts.

"There's just a lot going through my head at the moment. I feel confused. I," you paused, offering a meagre shrug, "I don't want to feel like I'm leading you on if things change."

Schlatt's eyes focused on you intently as he took in every single word, pause and articulation you breathed, before slowly nodding in understanding.

"Did you want to," Schlatt paused, his eyes softened, "cool off for a bit?"

"No." Adamantly speaking, one thing you were sure of in a flurry on confusion. "I just want to make sure we're on the same page. I don't want either one of us getting our hopes up, or trying too hard to make things work."

"We'll just take it as it comes. You sit in the drivers seat," his voice tinged with understanding, "and tell me to get out the fuckin' car once you've had enough of me." Schlatt's lips curved into a gentle smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners, radiating a sense of playfulness. His words carrying a lightheartedness that helped alleviate some of the tension in the air.

A brief moment of silence consumed the room once more before he used his arm to gently pull you into his side, placing a chaste kiss on the top of your head. He spoke with a gentleness you didn't believe was possible with a man of his stature and assertive demeanour, "We'll figure it out together don't worry."

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#chuckle sandwich #chucklesandwich #jschlatt #jschlatt x reader #jschlatt x you #schlatt x you #schlatt x reader #schlatt #female reader #ao3 writer #ao3 fanfic #guilt and shame

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