#desiree clary

[josefavomjaaga]

Just me or do Empress Joséphine and Désirée Clary look a bit alike?

Good question. It had never occurred to me but now that you mention it... Let's have a look 😊:

Judging from the examples above, I'd say Josephine's face was a bit more round-shaped, but that the ladies defintely were of a similar type: light skin, dark hair, dark eyes, a rather small mouth and an overall sweet, child-like appearance.

Of course, looking at other portraits by Gerard:

... this seems to have been true for pretty much every lady of high society in Paris? - So, I would not know if these similarities are due to the ladies really looking that much alike, or if they are due to the painter's particular style, or result from the painter trying to flatter his customer by beautifying her according to contemporary ideals.

But maybe that's just me not paying all that much attention to the ladies' looks in general, because in my head canon, their looks played the smallest role when it came to marriages or alliances.

Thank you for the Ask! - And additions, corrections and opinions always welcome and highly encouraged, please!

[mandatorycommunistbrunchhour]

The tournament for Nappy

[usergreenpixel]

JACOBIN FICTION CONVENTION MEETING 35: THE QUEEN’S FORTUNE (2020)

1. The Introduction

Well, hello there, Citizens! Neighbors too, since we have a figure who is interesting for both communities. Welcome back to the convention! Please leave weapons by the door cause you will need them later, take your seats and enjoy tea with tricolor cupcakes!

So, Allison Pataki is an author who will definitely become my nemesis in the future, considering her less than stellar work with this particular book (more on that later). Now, I knew from the ever so blunt (but lovely) @maggiec70 that it would be a bad book with about as much accuracy as your average conspiracy theory, but… BOY WAS I UNPREPARED!

The book turned out to be not bad. Not even mediocre. It’s straight up garbage fit only for wiping one’s ass when toilet paper runs out. Don’t believe me? Well, let’s dive deeper into this mess, shall we?

(By the way, I couldn’t find it online for free due to copyright but owners of Audible accounts can purchase the audiobook or you can pay for an ebook.)

2. The Summary

The book tells a story of Napoleon’s first fiancée, one Desirée Clary. She later would become the wife of Marshal Bernadotte and Queen of Sweden, whose descendants rule the country to this day.

Quite a fascinating story, if you ask me! Also, shoutout to @tairin for introducing me to Bernadotte as a historical figure (she is my guide to the Napoleonic era in general too). And to Maggie for bringing this novel to my attention.

Okay, the premise is interesting and extraordinary, isn’t it? But let’s see what the execution is!

3. The Story

Right off the bat, the story reeks of multiple inaccuracies (in both Frev and Napoleonic departments) worse than roadkill in summer heat. Inaccuracies that range from details (such as getting the year of convents closing wrong) to things that could’ve been avoided with one google search (such as Code Napoleon’s date or the timeline of Joseph’s rule of Naples). Also the usual Thermidorian bullshit with evil Robespierre and MODERATE THERMIDORIANS (because a group that includes war criminals is DEFINITELY MORE MODERATE THAN ROBESPIERRE AND CO, AMIRITE?!)

I know I usually don’t review media based on accuracy, but anyone with any knowledge about the topic (like me) risks getting a severe case of a broken brain from everything wrong in the book. This ended up hurting my immersion into the story because I had the urge to scream at my screen the entire time.

Another thing that hurts the narrative is the length. Personally, I found the story really overstayed its welcome and should’ve ended sooner, like after Desirée becomes Queen. But no, it drags on afterwards and the last chapters are basically filler, even more so than the rest of the book (which is a giant bore). The pacing just drags on like an old horse in slow mo.

(The story begins in 1789 and ends in 1860, for a reference.)

Last but not least, there is a very unnecessary and not accurate at all sex scene un the beginning of the book. Not only is that scene completely unnecessary for the story, but it also completely breaks suspension of disbelief and just makes the characters come off as modern cosplayers, not the people they’re supposed to be.

(For those in the back: DESIRÉE NEVER FUCKED NAPOLEON!!)

Okay, moving on!

4. The Characters

Bland. Most of them are blander than the BRAT diet.

Desirée Clary is the worst offender when it comes to characters feeling too modern, since the book is told from her perspective. She’s also a flat character and a bit too omnipresent when it comes to being at important events, even before her marriage to Bernadotte. We also don’t learn much about her as a person so there’s no reason to sympathize with her. Personally, I just didn’t care about her. She’s supposed to be someone who becomes a grown strong person throughout the story but we don’t see much character development to reflect this.

Napoleon Bonaparte is a bit more complex but that bar is low anyway. He definitely has his moments when he’s a jerk but can be a romantic. Also he kisses Desirée without her consent in the book during a game similar to Hide and Seek. Yeah, I wish I was kidding but he’s basically sexually assaulted her in that scene. Other than that, not much to see here either.

Josephine Bonaparte is more complex but still bland and almost saintly at times. Her flaws are severely downplayed or omitted.

The Bonaparte sisters are all catty cunts outright compared to the Furies in the book. Letizia suffers the same fate.

Joseph Bonaparte is a loyal brother and a nice man.

Julie is the doting big sister.

Bernadotte is a loving husband and an ardent Jacobin who has “Death to Kings” tattooed on his chest in the book. Yeah, that old chestnut that is actually nothing more than a myth.

And so on. It’s like a show with cardboard cutouts in lieu of a story with good characters.

5. The Setting

Some descriptions are quite vivid, especially when it comes to Malmaison, but that’s about the only good thing I can say about this book.

6. The Writing

Hoo boy… Remember how I said that the characters feel like cosplayers from modern times? Well, Desirée (in the book) uses gems like “I rooted for her”. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure a bourgeois woman from that time wouldn’t know such words.

The dialogue in the book is mediocre due to the blandness of the characters and Pataki probably not giving two shits about delivering a good book, despite the fact that she is from a very rich and influential family and could’ve easily obtained access to all the research.

But hey, what do I know?

7. The Conclusion

Don’t read this book. Really, just don’t waste your time. I’m disappointed that the author took a good concept for a novel, wiped her ass with it and served the results in novel form.

I have my issues with that 1954 movie about Desirée, but, compared to THIS, that movie is a flawless masterpiece and at least there I felt some sort of way about Desirée as a character. Here, on the other hand, I just don’t give a shit, which is about the worst thing an author can achieve.

Anyway, to fit the theme of an extraordinary person the author was going for, here’s the promised song.

I hope you enjoyed the review and the song. Thank you for joining me today at the Jacobin Fiction Convention and stay tuned for future reviews!

Love,

- Citizen Green Pixel

[empirearchives]

Reading Desiree’s letters to Napoleon, it makes it seem like she really loved him.

When they were engaged she wrote:

“The thought of you is with me always, and will follow me to my grave.”

After they broke up and Napoleon married Josephine, she wrote:

“You have made me miserable for the rest of my life, and yet still have the heart to forgive you. My life is a horrible torture for me since I can no longer devote it to you.... You, Married! I cannot accustom myself to the idea, it is killing me, I cannot survive it.”

(Source: Adam Zamoyski, Napoleon: A Life)

And I think Bernadotte was basically Napoleon’s brother-in-law by his own standards

Curious fact: in Brazil, many believe that Desiree really was the love of Napoleon's life! this is due to the title of the film in brazil being: desiree: o amor de napoleão (brazilians put a subtitle on everything), i've heard reports of teachers teaching this! many people were named desiree after the movie and the book...apparently the name desiree was unknown in brazil until the book and movie arrived in the country. when talking about desiree in brazil almost always someone answers: o amor de napoleão!

That’s interesting!

Well, one could argue that Desiree was one of Napoleon’s first loves, although not a serious relationship per se. I fully admit that I have a soft spot for Desiree myself because it was that very movie you are talking about that started this *motions to everything*.

Napoleon harbored some sort of friendship for Desiree throughout his life. Some historians believe it comes from his Corsican thoughts on what constituted family. Desiree’s sister Julie marrying Joseph apparently gave Desiree some sort of honorary Bonaparte card. Some think this is why Napoleon put up with Bernadotte and his open hostility.

[empirearchives]

Marlon Brando as Napoleon Bonaparte

[costumeloverz71]

Désirée Clary (Jean Simmons) Pink print dress.. Désirée (1954).. Costume by René Hubert.

[dorememefasol]

*your interpretation of best: sweetest, funniest, most deranged, etc.

[lavenderrosiefan]

Aikatsu: The Stars of Legend-Birthdays, gems, and ages

Author's Note: Season 1 takes place from August 2022-December 2023, while Season 2 takes place from January 2024-August 2024. Season 3 will take place from September 2024 onwards.

Season 1:

Raki-December 7, 2005 (Blue Chalcedony; S1: 16 years old; S2: 18 years old)

Wakaba-September 3, 2004 (Pink Sapphire; S1: 17 years old; S2: 19 years old)

Radiance-April 23, 2005 (Yellow Diamond; S1: 17 years old; S2: 18 years old)

Clara-March 18, 2005 (Morganite; S1: 17 years old; S2: 18 years old)

Susie Sokolova-January 23, 2006 (Rose Quartz; S1: 16 years old; S2: 17 years old)

Alexandra J.-March 18, 2006 (Morganite; S1: 16 years old; S2: 17 years old)

Noelle-December 25, 2004 (Topaz; S1: 17 years old; S2: 19 years old)

Yvoria-July 16, 2005 (Ruby; S1: 17 years old; S2: 18 years old)

Ruthie-May 3, 2005 (Chrysoprase; S1: 17 years old; S2: 18 years old)

Rachel-May 3, 2005 (Chrysoprase; S1: 17 years old; S2: 18 years old)

Season 2:

Queen Alexandra-December 1, 1844 (Tanzanite; 179 years old)

Empress Maria Feodorovna-November 26, 1847 (Citrine; 176 years old)

Crown Princess Thyra-September 29, 1853 (Blackstar Sapphire; 170 years old)

Queen Wilhelmina-August 31, 1880 (Gray Spinel; 143 years old)

King Charles XIII-October 7, 1748 (Rubellite; 275 years old)

King Charles XIV John-January 26, 1763 (Garnet; 260 years old)

King George IV-August 12, 1762 (Peridot; 261 years old)

Prince Edward-November 2, 1767 (Citrine; 256 years old)

Princess Victoria-August 17, 1786 (Gray Spinel; 237 years old)

Rosetta-March 27, 2007 (Morganite; 17 years old)

Theodora-September 18, 2005 (Iolite; 18 years old)

Season 3:

Marcella-February 19, 2005 (Amethyst; 19 years old)

Grand Duchess Charlotte-January 23, 1896 (Rose Quartz; 128 years old)

Grand Duchess Xenia-April 6, 1875 (Yellow Diamond; 149 years old)

Princess Alice-December 25, 1901 (Topaz; 123 years old)

Queen Desideria-November 8, 1777 (Gray Quartz; 247 years old)

[thebeesareback]

Where to find multiple people from Taskmaster outside of the show

Baddiel and Skinner Unplanned: David Baddiel, Frank Skinner

Big Fat Quiz of the Year/Big Fat Quiz of Everything: Mawaan Rizwan, Judi Love, Noel Fielding, Dara O'Briain, Sarah Millican, Jo Brand, Romesh Ranganathan, Asim Chaudhry, Rose Matafeo, Mel Giedroyc

The Cleaner: Greg Davis, Asim Chaudhry, Sian Gibson

Cuckoo: Greg Davis, Asim Chaudhry

Doctor Who: Mawaan Rizwan, Ardal O'Hanlon

The Inbetweeners: Greg Davis, Joe Thomas, Susan Wokoma

Eight out of Ten Cats/ Eight out of 10 Cats does Countdown: Josh Widdicombe, Roisin Conaty, Romesh Ranganathan, Katherine Ryan, Richard Osman, Joe Wilkinson, Paul Chowdhry, Rob Beckett, Sara Pascoe, Lolly Adefope, Aisling Bea, Nish Kumar, Alice Levine, Liza Tarbuck, Jessica Knappett, Phil Wang, David Baddiel, Rose Matafeo, Daisy May Cooper, Johnny Vegas, Lee Mack, Morgana Robinson, Chris Ramsey, Judi Love, Sophie Duker, Fern Brady, John Kearns, Sam Campbell

Frankie Boyle's New World Order: Frankie Boyle, Sara Pascoe, Nish Kumar, Desiree Burch, Fern Brady

Feel Good: Mae Martin, Charlotte Ritchie

Fresh Meat: Joe Thomas, Charlotte Ritchie, Rob Beckett

Ghosts: Lolly Adefope, Charlotte Ritchie, Jessica Knappett, Katy Wix, Bridget Christie, Keill Smith-Bynoe

The Great British Bakeoff: Rob Beckett, James Acastar, Sue Perkins, Mel Gierdroyc

Hypothetical: James Acaster, Josh Widdicombe, Roisin Conaty, Liza Tarbuck, Phil Wang, Lou Sanders, Rose Matafeo, Guz Khan, Victoria Cohen Mitchell, Judi Love, Dara O'Briain

Have I Got News for You: Roisin Conaty, Dave Gorman, Mel Giedroyc, Nish Kumar, Alice Levine, Liza Tarbuck, Phil Wang, Jo Brand, Richard Herring, Desiree Burch, Munya Chawawa, Sarah Millican, Ivo Graham, Julian Clary, Lucy Beaumont

Off Menu Podcast: James Acaster (host), Ed Gamble (host), Greg Davis, Nish Kumar, Alex Horne, Dara O'Briain, Katherine Ryan, Joe Thomas, Joe Lycett, Lolly Adefope, Bob Mortimer, Jamali Maddix, Morgana Robinson, Bridget Christie, John Kearns, Keill Smith-Bynoe, Mae Martin

Outnumbered: Hugh Dennis, Katy Wix, Lee Mack

Late Night Lycett: Joe Lycett (host), Katherine Ryan, Daisy May Cooper

The Last Leg: Josh Widdicombe (host), Romesh Ranganathan, Lolly Adefope, Jessica Knappett, Johnny Vegas, Sophie Duker, Lucy Beaumont, Jo Brand, Frank Skinner, Joe Thomas, Katherine Ryan, Greg Davis, Russell Howard, Roisin Conaty, Aisling Bea, Joe Lycett, Victoria Cohen Mitchell, James Acaster, Sally Phillips, Nish Kumar, Alex Horne, Kerry Godliman, Phil Wang, Jamali Maddix, Guz Khan, Desiree Burch, Munya Chawawa, Susan Wokoma, Rose Matafeo, Kiell Smith-Bynoe

Miranda: Joe Wilkinson, Mel Giedroyc, Sally Phillips, Liza Tarbuck, Katy Wix

Mock the Week: Dara O'Briain (host), Hugh Dennis (every episode), Frankie Boyle, Josh Widdicombe, Romesh Ranganathan, Katherine Ryan, Al Murray, Mark Watson, Nish Kumar, Kerry Godliman, Rhod Gilbert, Ed Gamble, Desiree Burch, Chris Ramsey, Sophie Duker, Sarah Millican, Ivo Graham

Man Down: Roisin Connarty, Greg Davis, Mike Wozniak

Not Going Out: Lee Mack, Hugh Dennis, Tim Vine, Katy Wix

Parenting Hell: Josh Widdicombe (host), Rob Beckett (host)

Paul Sinhar's TV Showdown: Paul Sinhar (host), Rob Beckett

QI: Romesh Ranganathan, Katherine Ryan, Richard Osman, Dave Gorman, Sara Pascoe, Hugh Dennis, Lolly Adefope, Aisling Bea, Mark Watson, Nish Kumar, Tim Vine, David Baddiel, Jo Brand, Rose Matafeo, Johnny Vegas, Alan Davis, Desiree Burch, Victoria Cohen Mitchell, Bridget Christie, Dara O'Briain, Ivo Graham, Jenny Eclair, Julian Clary, Sue Perkins

Quickly Kevin, Will He Score?: Josh Widdicombe (host) (busy guy), Ivo Graham

Rob and Romesh vs...: Romesh Ranganathan (host), Rob Becket (host)

Russell Howard's Good News: Russell Howard (host) (obviously), Roisin Conaty, Romesh Ranganathan, Doc Brown, Joe Wilkinson, Aisling Bea, Iain Sterling, Lou Sanders, Ed Gamble, Chris Ramsey

The Russell Howard Hour: Russell Howard (host) (obviously), Paul Chowdhry, Jessica Knappett, Lou Sanders, Desiree Burch

Would I Lie to You: Richard Osman, Bob Mortimer, Phil Wang, Rhod Gilbert, Joe Thomas, Lou Sanders, Sian Gibson, Jo Brand, Katherine Parkinson, Lee Mack, Sarah Kendall, Desiree Burch, Ardal O'Hanlon, Judi Love, Munya Chawawa, Sarah Millican, Lucy Beaumont

Very Modern Quests: Alice Levine, Greg James, Joe Lycett, Phil Wang

Enjoy!

[panelshowsource]

britcom comedians & panel show personalities who share your sign

AQUARIUS ♒ dara ó briain • frank skinner • glenn moore • guz khan • hugh dennis • lucy porter • maisie adam • mark watson • phil wang • vic reeves

PISCES ♓ aisling bea • alan davies • dave gorman • ed gamble • jenny eclair • katy wix • michael mcintyre • rose matafeo

ARIES ♈ andy parsons • desiree burch • ed byrne • gary delaney • jamali maddix • john kearns • josh widdicombe • josie long • roisin conaty • romesh ranganathan • rory bremner

TAURUS ♉ al murray • alex brooker • catherine tate • greg davies • joe wilkinson • john robins • mae martin • milton jones • morgana robinson • rhys james • rob brydon • sally phillips • sandi toksvig • sean lock • stephen mangan

GEMINI ♊ alan carr • bob mortimer • david baddiel • fern brady • judi love • julian clary • london hughes • mel giedroyc • noel fielding • paul sinha • rich hall • richard ayoade • sara pascoe • sarah millican • shappi khorsandi • sindhu vee • tom allen

CANCER ♋ adam hills • alice levine • david mitchell • katherine ryan • harriet kemsley • ian hislop • jack whitehall • joe lycett • paul merton • peter serafinowicz • phill jupitus • rosie jones

LEO ♌ bridget christie • cariad lloyd • chris ramsey • daisy may cooper • frankie boyle • isy suttie • lee mack • jo brand • nish kumar • victoria coren mitchell

VIRGO ♍ alex horne • dane baptiste • darren harriott • ivo graham • jimmy carr • johnny vegas • lolly adefope • miles jupp • nina conti • stephen fry • sue perkins • tim key

LIBRA ♎ diane morgan • harry hill • jack dee • jon richardson • limmy • nick helm • rhod gilbert • robert webb • tiff stevenson • zoe lyons

SCORPIO ♏ angela barnes • chris addison • elis james • ellie taylor • holly walsh • liza tarbuck • jonathan ross • kerry godliman • kevin bridges • matt forde • mike wozniak • sofie hagen • susan calman

SAGITTARIUS ♐ adam riches • david o'doherty • jessica knappett • larry dean • miranda hart • richard osman • seann walsh • simon amstell • steven k. amos

CAPRICORN ♑ ahir shah • angus deayton • bill bailey • claudia winkleman • james acaster • mark lamarr • paul foot • rob beckett • suzi ruffell

[saturniasxenos]

PINK N PRETTY ID PACK

Inside this pack, you will find: Pronouns, Titles, Names, and Genders that relate to Pink colors, Pink stuff, Cute things, Pretty things, and anything alike! (I put whatever I (personally) thought was cute, pink, and/or pretty.) + (Includes Masc titles & names)

No matter who you are, or what you look like, YOU ARE PRETTY. 🫶

"How many emoji pronouns do you want?"

"Yes."

This entire pack was inspired by an OC of mine called Lotus 🩷🪷

Pronouns:

Pi/Pin/Pink/Pinks/Pinkself

Ro/Ros/Rose/Roses/Roseself

Ro/Ros/Rosa/Rosas/Rosaself

Lo/Lov/Love/Loves/Loveself

Hea/Hear/Heart/Hearts/Heartself

Blo/Bloo/Bloom/Blooms/Bloomself

Fla/Flami/Flamingo/Flamingos/Flamingoself

Fu/Fuch/Fuchsia/Fuchsias/Fuchsiaself

Or/Orch/Orchid/Orchids/Orchidself

Wate/Waterme/Watermelon/Watermelons/Watermelonself

Lo/Lot/Lotus/Lotuses/Lotusself

Pe/Pet/Petal/Petals/Petalself

Che/Cherr/Cherry/Cherrys/Cherryself

Blo/Bloss/Blossom/Blossoms/Blossomself

Ce/Ceri/Cerise/Cerises/Ceriseself

Pea/Peae/Peach/Peachs/Peachself

Blu/Blus/Blush/Blushs/Blushself

Tu/Tuli/Tulip/Tulips/Tulipself

Cu/Cut/Cute/Cutes/Cuteself

Pre/Prett/Pretty/Prettys/Prettyself

Ma/Mage/Magenta/Magentas/Magentaself

Pa/Pas/Pastel/Pastels/Pastelself

Swe/Swae/Sweet/Sweets/Sweetself

Flo/Flow/Flower/Flowers/Flowerself

Flo/Flor/Flora/Floras/Floraself

Pre/Preci/Preciae/Precious/Preciousself

Ri/Ribb/Ribbon/Ribbons/Ribbonself

Fri/Frill/Frillae/Frills/Frillself

Do/Doll/Dolly/Dolls/Dollself

Co/Cor/Coral/Corals/Coralself

Da/Daw/Dawn/Dawns/Dawnself

Sun/Sunse/Sunset/Sunsets/Sunsetself

Hib/Hibis/Hibiscus/Hibiscuses/Hibiscusself

Dia/Diam/Diamond/Diamonds/Diamondself

Gem/Gemsto/Gemstone/Gemstones/Gemstoneself

Gor/Gorge/Gorgeous/Gorgeousness/Gorgeousself

La/Lac/Lace/Laces/Laceself

Pu/Puff/Puffy/Puffys/Puffyself

Flu/Fluff/Fluffy/Fluffys/Fluffyself

Pom/Pomp/Pompom/Pompoms/Pompomself

Po/Pop/Poppy/Poppys/Poppyself

Chrys/Chrysan/Chrysanthemum/Chrysanthemums/Chrysanthemumself

Ast/Aste/Aster/Asters/Asterself

Ga/Garn/Garnet/Garnets/Garnetself

Pe/Pear/Pearl/Pearls/Pearlself

Op/Opa/Opal/Opals/Opalself

Qua/Quart/Quartz/Quartzs/Quartzself

Bub/Bubble/Bubblegum/Bubblegums/Bubblegumself

Car/Carna/Carnation/Carnations/Carnationself

Stra/Straw/Strawberry/Strawberrys/Strawberryself

Ma/Mau/Mauve/Mauves/Mauveself

Sa/Sak/Sakura/Sakuras/Sakuraself

Li/Lil/Lily/Lilys/Lilyself

Emoji Pronouns: 💋/💋's, 💄/💄's, 💅/💅's, 🩷/🩷's, 🪷/🪷's, 🐷/🐷's, 🐖/🐖's, 🦑/🦑's, 🦩/🦩's, 🌸/🌸's, 🌺/🌺's, 🌷/🌷's, 🍑/🍑's, 🩰/🩰's, 🎀/🎀's, 🧸/🧸's, 🌹/🌹's, 👛/👛's, 💕/💕's, 💞/💞's, 💓/💓's, 💖/💖's, 💗/💗's, 💘/💘's, 💝/💝's, 💐/💐's, 🍥/🍥's, 🧁/🧁's, 🍧/🍧's, 💒/💒's, 🏩/🏩's, 🧼/🧼's, 💌/💌's, ❤/❤'s, 💔/💔's, ❣️/❣️'s, ❤️‍🩹/❤️‍🩹's, ❤️‍🔥/❤️‍🔥's, ♥/♥'s, ♦/♦'s, 🦄/🦄's, 🦢/🦢's

Titles:

Pretty In Pink

(X) Who's Pink

The Prettiest

Perfect Pink

The Pink One

Dancing With Pink Petals

(X) Who Loves Pink

(X) Who Feels Pretty

Sparkling

(X) Who Sparkles

Sparkling In Pink

(X) Who's Aura Is Pink

The Pink Spirit

The Cute Spirit

The Pink Creature

Dancing With Doves

The Pretty Dove

The Pretty Creature

The Pretty Pink Spirit

The Pretty Spirit

(X) Who Blooms

(X) Who Blossoms

The Blossoming Flower

The Pink Flower

The Pretty Flower

Deity of Pink

God of Pink

Goddess of Pink

Names:

Fem: Aphrodite, Ara, Azalea, Amora, Amaranth, Annabella, Annabelle, Amandine, Aimee, Aelia, Alani, Aviva, Briallen, Belle, Blossom, Bellerose, Begonia, Blush, Briar, Coral, Celia, Colette, Cerise, Clary, Camellia, Cherry, Carnation, Coralie, Coraline, Desiree, Dahlia, Dennise, Eglantine, Elodie, Elke, Esme, Fae, Fuchsia, Flamina, Flora, Fraise, Garnet, Hana, Huong, Heather, Isadora, Irisa, Jada, Jadah, Jalajaa, Keasha, Koral, Kamelia, Lien, Linnea, Lacey, Lyanne, Laelia, Leilani, Lotus, Mink, Mimose, Magenta, Mauve, Nerine, Odessa, Peony, Pearl, Petunia, Pinkie, Pink, Pinkus, Pinkney, Rosella, Rosanna, Rose, Rosie, Rosa, Rosalie, Rosaline, Rosalind, Rosabella, Rosita, Roseanna, Roseanne, Rydell, Rora, Rada, Rhoda, Sharyn, Sonnet, Scarlett, Sadie, Sandhya, Teuila, Varda, Venus, Xiloxoch, Yvete, Zelie,

Masc: Asmodeus, Amandus, Amadeus, Aziz, Amias, Altansarnai, Alroy, Astilbe, Akala, Amado, Amato, Connelly, Caleb, Cordovan, Carwyn, Corwin, Cordian, Dariel, Dante, Dilan, David, Darell, Eros, Fuchsio, Florian, Fenmore, Floyd, Geranium, Gul, Gulabi, Gulzar, Haneul, Hart, Jamil, Jared, Kiefer, Kevin, Kamal, Kunal, Lohan, Leif, Lennon, Milos, Manik, Manu, Magento, Mauverell, Mawar, Phlox, Roz, Rosario, Rosalio, Rosen, Razzmatazz, Rosamel, Roosevelt, Rouge, Rosewood, Rosewell, Rozovo, Roth, Thulian, Taffy, Vered, Zahri,

Neu: Amor, Aruna, Aphro, Adonis, Ambrose, Ceri, Callisto, Ceinwen, Carmine, Cassius, Corentin, Cupid, Dianthe, Erasmus, Erastus, Erato, Francis, Kamon, Kokoro, Koharu, Kirani, Kaipo, Lerato, Loxi, Martie, Maud, Mallow, Noa, Nasrin, Parvati, Obi, Pembe, Primrose, Paris, Rozene, Sakura, Sorrell, Salmon, Sashiro, Syd, Valentine, Valentino, Vaihere, Varuna, Xinyi, Zerah,

Genders:

Viosalimi - a gender connected to liminal spaces in the colors of pink & purple, whether it be the color combo or the two separately.

Ivsidirosen - a colorgender connected to the colors pink, black, and white

Pinkribbon - a gender under the genderribbon system which is related to the color pink & ribbons ; like ribbons being colored pink or being the color pink that loves ribbons , or any other combination of the two .

Pinkangeldigital / Pinkangelvirtual - a gender in which your gender is related to virtual / digital themes and pink angels, being a virtual/ digital pink angel, being a pink angel and loving virtual / digital themes, being a virtual /digital being who loves pink and angel themes, etc!

Pinkmagicalgirlic - a xenogender that relates to being a pink magical girl. it can also relate to the aesthetic of pink magical girls, the colour pink, or being a magical girl !! the gender often feels feminine or neutral .

Pinkdollic - A gender under the genderdollic system related to the color pink and being a doll

Pinkshirofoxic - a gender related to white foxes, pastel pink, and soft aesthetics.

Pinkadorded - a gender under genderadored related to being adorable ) adored and the color pink . may be related to being the color pink who is adored by all , the color pink who is adorable or being the color pink and adored.

Strawlovecatrum - a masculine- and neutral-in-nature xenogender that is best described by strawberries, lovecore, pink, and cats!

Pinkpresentic - A gender that presents itself in a pink way/as pink/in a way that involves a lot of pink. Can be used as a descriptor for other terms

Pinkrufflic - a xenogender relating to pink and ruffles, or pink in a ruffly way

Pinkabomination - a gender connected to being an abomination of pink , being an abomination in a pink way , etc.

Pinkcutecorian - a gender related to cutecore, pastel pink, and cutesy fashion

Pinkbratfem - a gender related to pink, being a stereotypical "bratty girl" and being transfem

Redpinkic - a gender connected to the colors red and pink, specifically when they're together

Pinkvampgender - A gender in which you are connected to vampires, softness, and the cuteness of pink, soft vampires.

Pinkgender - an aesthetigender under the colorgender umbrella connected to the color pink. One who is pinkgender might feel as though their gender is validated by the color pink, or as though their gender is best described as the color pink.

Pinkmetropolistic - A gender related to pink cities or cities that primarily have the color pink in them

[Link] Pixelovic - a gender related to pixel hearts, chiptune music, love, and the colors pink and red 🩷🩷 Loverwave - a gender connected to love, being a lover, and being a wave

Feinflambelle - a fein gender connected to pink, make-up, nail polish, perfume, flamboyant dressing, bright colours, dresses, and skirts.

Pinkautix — A subset of autigender related to the color pink

[unquietspiritao3]

If you’re my assigned author for the LAH Fic Club Exchange S1 (or are just nosy), please read!

Hello, Dear Author!

I’m thrilled we’ve matched and excited to read what you write for me! Most of this is repeated from AO3, just so you have it all in one place, but at the bottom, I’ve added super important information if you want to write humiliation kink, daddy kink, or sexual ageplay for me. Please read it carefully.

Thank you so much for writing!

Optional Details for Each Request

Request 1: Greg/Alex, Soft Dom Greg

(Optional Tags: Domestic Kink, Cuddling & Snuggling, Fluff, Forehead Kisses, Hurt/Comfort, Praise Kink)

IRL!Greg is such a sweet, gentle guy, and I want more representation of that in fic! Give me Greg being soft and caring while still dominating Alex, please. He could also be strict and stern in an overtly loving way.

This sort of dynamic can be combined with any of my general kinks (listed below), but I think it pairs really well with puppy play or daddy kink (with or without sexual ageplay).

Request 2: Alex/Everyone, Taskmaster Late Night/“Blue” Edition

(Optional Tags: Crack Treated Seriously, Episode Style, Desiree Burch, Ed Gamble, Fern Brady, Greg Davies, James Acaster, John Robins, Josh Widdicombe, Julian Clary, Mae Martin, Morgana Robinson, Noel Fielding, Rhod Gilbert, Sally Phillips, Sam Campbell, Sophie Duker, Victoria Coren Mitchell)

Alex keeps talking about it, let’s give him some inspiration! I’d love to see kinky tasks completed by some of our favorite contestants. I’ve listed my personal faves in the optional tags.

In accordance with my DNWs, please set this up so it is fully consensual for the participants, the studio audience, and the viewers at home! That could be through making it an actual porn film or setting it in a BDSM AU, maybe? Or maybe it’s not actually on TV at all, just a special invite-only event of some kind, ala the excellent fic ‘pink and pretty’ by 2manyboys.

Also, if Greg is included, I prefer his dynamic with Alex to be more loving, as in later series.

Request 3: Noel/Rhod and/or Noel/Julian, Friends with Benefits

(Optional Tags: Begging, Biting, Lingerie, Orgasm Control, Overstimulation)

I’d love some sub!Noel in/just after his party days, getting by with a little help from his friends. Maybe he’s trying not to use so many drugs and is looking for a natural high to replace it? Maybe it’s just a thing for fun? Maybe it’s during Rhod’s tenure as host of NMTB, or maybe it’s him and Julian being Camden princes together?

General Kinks

Orgasm control, including edging, ‘forced’ orgasms, ruined orgasms, prostate milking, overstimulation, and chastity

Humiliation (please read the follow-up section below!)

Omorashi, especially combined with diapers

Soft dominance, the kind that has a genuine ‘I love you and I’m doing this for your own good’ feel

Old-fashioned domestic-style punishments such as over-the-knee spanking, mouthsoaping, scoldings and lectures

Daddy kink, with or without sexual ageplay (please read the follow-up section below!)

Devotion to your partner, whether expressed through service submission, puppy play, deity/worship kink, just thinking about how much you love them and would do anything for them, etc.

Bratting (consensual, not ‘topping from the bottom’)

Consensual non-consent (Please look this one up if you don’t know what it is, but in a nutshell, it means the submissive says ‘no’ when they don’t actually mean it, because they have a safeword. Also, I prefer the existence of the safeword to be explicitly mentioned in the story.)

Exhibitionism, either in a humiliating way or a showing-off way

DNWs

Non-con/dub-con

Total power exchange

Degradation (please read the follow-up section below!)

Incest (including step-family members, clones raised together, etc.) or incest fantasy (please read the follow-up section below!)

Graphic violence

Bloodplay

Needle play

Breathplay

Scat

Non-sexual ageplay

Bad BDSM etiquette (ie, under-negotiated kink; doing kink in public or on TV without the fully-informed consent of all participants, audience members, and viewers; anything else along these lines)

And in non-kinky lines: children, any sort of death, infidelity, any mention of real-life partners of any characters, AI-generated works

Important Distinctions

Degradation vs. Humiliation

Humiliation is one of my main kinks. Degradation is one of my main triggers. I’ve found that while the difference between these two is clear to me, it’s difficult for people who like both (or dislike both) to distinguish them, so I’m going to do my best to describe what I, personally, enjoy and what I don’t. If you have any uncertainty in this area, please avoid anything that could verge on either.

Verbal

I enjoy words that, even in a non-BDSM setting, would seem playfully teasing (not condescending) or stern-but-caring. “Naughty” is my favorite adjective, and a genuinely kind, gentle attitude from a dominant can often up the emotional intensity of a scolding. 

I do not enjoy words that, in a non-BDSM setting, would seem cruel—like name-calling, put-downs, yelling, or verbal coldness or condescension—even if, in the story, the submissive is meant to be read as enjoying it and the dominant is meant to be read as not really meaning it.

Situational

I enjoy situations where the submissive is temporarily embarrassed—though often to an extreme degree—while still feeling genuinely cared-for by the dominant both in the moment of embarrassment and after. The care between them must be explicitly shown in the story, not left to me to layer on top.

I do not enjoy situations where the submissive is made to feel at all worthless, less-than, judged, unloved, or ashamed of who they are as a person, even if, in the story, they are meant to be read as enjoying or not minding these feelings.

Incest Fantasy vs. Daddy Kink with Sexual Ageplay

Yet another area where I have a kink for one thing and a trigger for a different thing that is just similar enough for people to get them confused! (I’m difficult, I know. Sorry!) Again, I’ll do my best to explain the important distinctions between these from my personal point of view, but if you have doubts, please steer clear of both.

Daddy kink with sexual ageplay is where the dominant is taking on a parental, caregiving role while the submissive takes on a younger headspace during sexual play. (I prefer the headspace to be more on the side of roleplay than regression, though I’m fine with partial regression as long as it is explicit that the submissive is still in possession of their adult faculties enough to be able to fully consent.)

In these sorts of scenes, the submissive calls the dominant ‘daddy’ (even though they might be embarrassed about it because of the way society views adults who use that word for their partner) and the dominant does and says parental things, but the idea of being related is not part of what gets them off sexually. It’s simply a convenient way to explain their roles in the dynamic. The focus of the scene is the caregiving and the freedom of a younger mindset—and, in my favorite ageplay scenes, the humiliation of being lovingly treated as if you’re younger than you know you are, for your own good.

Incest fantasy is where the characters fantasize about and get off on the taboo of having sex with a relative (even if they are not attracted to their actual relatives and would never want to actually have sex with them). Anything that focuses on a fantasized familial relationship in this way is likely to trigger me. It’s therefore best, for me, if you avoid using familial words/phrases except in dialogue, so it’s clear that the character is not really fantasizing about the partner as a family member, but rather just calling them a ‘title’ that corresponds to their role.

[everythingroyalty]

if jodie comer played desiree clary in movie

That's certainly a good lookalike fancast, anon 👍

Speaking of, they should definitely make a movie about Jean-Baptiste Bernadotte and Désirée Clary. Why do they keep making Henry VIII movies when they could be making (what I'd call) Austerlitz: By principle and conviction? It's beyond me 🤷‍♀️

If you understand Danish, the podcast Det hemmeligeste af det hemmelige actually just made a banging episode about JBB and Folke Bernadotte.

[duchessofostergotlands]

jodie comer as desiree clary

Huh?

[costumeloverz71]

Désirée Clary (Jean Simmons) Black top, white lace collar & skirt, purple sash.. Desiree (1954).. Costume by René Hubert & Charles Le Maire.