#dennis is a stupid name

[superbellsubways]

i drew a human (Crazy!!!????!)

remake of an oc I made in middle school

[jevilowo]

We as a society need to make more utau tf2 spy gumi song covers idk what it is about Gumi but at least four of her songs are extremely spycore and brother those are the only four I've listened to

I say utau because ai is bad but utauing is just sentence mixing with extra steps so 👍

[aidansplaguewind]

Y'all I just had like the literal shit scared out of me.

I was in the bathroom and my 10-year-old starts screaming and crying bloody murder. I'm like "WHAT HAPPENED?" and he's like, "Mommy come, his neck! Come quick."

So I started screaming for my oldest son to get in there while I get my pants up. Like dude, his bedroom door was wide open and we live in a tiny house. His room is right next to the bathroom where I was, and I could hear it, so wtf?! Why it take so long for him to get in there and calm him down? Issue for another day but damn kid, get your head out your ass.

Anyway, our kitten, Kevin, had gotten his head stuck between the wooden slats that make up the backs of our kitchen chairs. He's fine. I just had to slide him up to the top where the opening is wider.

But damn, that screaming and crying scared the fucking fuckety fuck out of me. There's nothing that makes your heart beat faster, and every hair on your body stand up, quite like the sound of your kid screaming in fear.

This little fucker is an absolute idiot and I haven't had a kitten in so long I forgot how absolutely stupid they are! Just thought I'd share.

[nerdynikki94]

When the misogyny was so constant and ended up being canonically validated (😤), one has no choice but to focus on the macdennis seating arrangement; AND Mac's defiance by deviating from his *straight* execution against Dennis' outright demand... and then gutterballing. Just like Dennis promised he would.

[apho-sappho]

'Lan Wangxian' is going to make me kill

[s0undsinmyhead]

Obviously Alex’s exit from Grey’s Anatomy is one of the worst pieces of garbage ever to be on TV. It is up there with the finale of How I Met Your Mother and Supernatural, the common theme here being completely obliterating years and years of character development. But one small, easy adjustment that would have made Alex’s pathetic exit better and more in character is to have him abandon his wife, best friend, patients, and his entire life to be with his kids. And that’s it. This whole “being in love with Jo and Izzie” is such absolute garbage. Is spitting on the development of Jo and Alex’s relationship. It ignores the development of Alex as a person. Izzie is his past. They were toxic together and not a good match and made each other miserable. And he moved on and grew up and found someone who worked better with him and loved him. Him leaving Jo because he needed to be with his children and Jo couldn’t leave her entire life in Seattle to live in Kansas is a storyline I could almost believe in. Alex leaving Jo because he still loves Izzie without seeing or speaking to her in over a decade after she lied to him and hid his kids from him and he can’t even come home to talk to Jo like a man is so disappointing it leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

[ishouldbeoverfanficsbynow]

Lomper and Dennis are the ultimate old gay couple representation because they're both so stupid and insecure but so obsessed with each other and they drag everyone into their drama and they nearly ended a decades long marriage over a pigeon

[henry7931]

Halloween Tales: Pumkle!

Caleb:

Okay I realize it’s not the best looking pumpkin but I tried my best! And I really wanted to do something fun for the season so… I guess I started with carving a pumpkin? I even named him Albert lol.

I’m 21, single, gay, and kinda lonely all around. I’ve really tried making attempts at making friends in my new college town but I guess I’m just weird. Plus, it doesn’t help that my parents got me a townhome to myself.

I started to head inside when I heard the sound of a car pulling in. I look up and knew instantly by the 2009 mustang that it was in fact my uncle Dennis.

“Oh great!”

Dennis climbs out and immediately starts talking.

“Sup Bud!”

“Hi Uncle Dennis. What are you doing here?”

“Well I talk to my brother and I’m out of a job right now. And he said I can come live with you for a bit. So looks like we’re roommates!”

“Fuck…” I say under my breath.

I thought for a moment he heard me but he just kept talking… which eventually turned into a ramble.

“So yeah, like I was saying you’re going to have to be cool with what I want around here. Starting with getting rid of this stupid pumpkin.”

“Oh come on Dennis! I just got done with carving it! His name’s Albert.”

“Ha! You named him? How fucking silly! We’ll say goodbye to Andy.”

“Albert.”

Dennis carries my pumpkin to our dumpster and tosses it in.

I walk back into my house pissed off. I couldn’t believe he just did that!

I stayed in my room for hours trying my best to avoid him. But eventually I have to leave my room.

It’s 8 o’clock now and I walk out of my room. I look around and Dennis had literally turned my place into his own person man cave.

I walk outside to find sitting on my front porch.

“You’re awake! I was wonderin when you’re gonna start cooking dinner because I’m starving!”

“Bro you can’t cook?”

“Hell no! But you can,” he says lighting a cigarette.

“Why would I do that,” I say crossing my arms.

“Well you can cook for me or I can tell your parents all the bad things you’ve been doing here.”

I roll my eyes and stormed into the kitchen. I cook for him and he even complained about the food!

After that, I uncle Dennis pulled off his clothes down to his boxers and flung his body on the couch. I couldn’t believe his lack of decency. But I also felt something strange deep inside of me. A weird attraction to his fit body.

I realize my uncle is a good looking man but his personality sucks! And I feel so grossed out by even finding myself being so turned on…

But his big smelly feet… his pits… his chest… his bulge… god it’s been a minute since I’ve seen a handsome my body that wasn’t on the internet.

I run off to bed and lay down. I realize that I have a raging boner. So I angrily started jerking off trying not to think about Dennis.

But alas… his body is all I have on my mind.

I think about how he’s such a dick that I literally blurt out, “I wish that I could change Dennis! That someone or something would just takeover him and let me do whatever I want with his body! I want to smell his feet so bad! I want to feel his cock… his balls! Have his strong hands rub all over me!!! Ohhhh fucccccc…”

I came at the thought and soon fell asleep.

The Next Morning…

I wake up and get out of bed. I head to the bathroom and here Dennis is inside.

“Hey Dennis can you hurry up! I have to pee!”

Dennis swings open the door and he’s standing in his briefs last night and he’s WEARING MY PUMPKIN ALBERT OVER HIS HEAD!

“Really funny Dennis! Now take it off.”

Dennis shrugs at me and then I notice something… the pumpkin is hallow…

I begin to scream and run… the pumpkinhead wearing uncles body follows me until I’m in a corner.

“What are you going to do to me?!?,” I say to it as it fully approaches.

He reaches out and grabs my hand. He moves my hand to Dennis’s crotch. He return reaches into my pajama pants and starts fondling my dick…

“Holy crap…”

I lose train of thought for second because it feels so good.

“ Hold on a sec, how and why are you controlling Dennis’s body?”

He turns and looks around the room trying to search for something. And then gestures like he wants to write something.

I find him a pin and paper. I give it to him and he starts to write.

“Hi Caleb, it’s me Albert! I heard your wish last night and decided to take over Dennis. Thank you for granting me his body, I’m so happy to have it. Now I can’t wait to serve you. This body is now just as much as yours as it is mine. Oh and one more thing! Sorry I look scary right now butI’ll look normal soon I promise!”

“My wish… that’s right! Wait… What about Dennis’s uhhh head.”

Albert grabs my hand and leads me to the front porch. I see a new pumpkin sitting with what looks to be a very angry face.

“That’s Dennis?”

He gives me a thumbs up.

“So what now?”

He takes my hand and leads me back to the bedroom.

Albert lays down on my bed and pulls off his new bodies briefs.

The beautiful body that once belonged to my Uncle Dennis is now completely naked in front of me.

I thought for a moment that maybe I should stop but what’s the point? I can’t undo anything now.

I get into bed with him and immediately press my face into his crotch. He has this mush to him that so hot to me and I just know it’s been a minute since his body has had a proper shower.

I kiss down his thighs and look down at his big sexy feet.

I look up at Albert and say, “feel free to play with your new dick for a few. I’m going to be down here,” I say directing to his feet.

I run my tongue up and down his soles while watching Albert gently fondle his new dick. He twists his nipples which causes his dick to leak a bit.

I stand up and pull off everything that I’m wearing.

I put his big feet together and start rubbing my boner in between his soles. Albert catches on and starts giving me a foot job.

He works his toes so well… it’s impressive especially since last night he didn’t have any.

I moaning loudly and Albert pace’s faster on both of our cocks. Im watching his big hairy balls move up and down… his tight grip on his cock…

I can’t take much more…

We both explode at the same time. His feet and his chest is covered in cum.

I lick his toes clean and work my way up to his chest.

I lick his cum off of him and I notice something. His cum has a pumpkin flavor to it.

I bust out laughing and crawl up to his chest. He pulls me in and we’re both lying naked cuddled up together.

A few hours later, we wake up from a nap and we’re both hard again. This time Albert takes control and works my cock for me.

I cum again and crawl down to his dick. I give his throbbing head a kiss before sucking him off.

Albert seems to love it from how squirmy it made his body. He must have known he was close because he literally pushes my head in and cums down my throat.

We eventually get up and I take us to the bathroom.

I turn on the shower and we both get in. Our bodies are rubbing soap all on each other and I keep kissing him. Albert seems to be fascinated by my cock because he can’t stop touching it.

I feel his cute hairy butt and got an idea. I gingerly inserted a finger into his hole.

“Is that okay?” I ask him.

That’s when he makes almost a grunting noise.

“Oh my god Albert! Are you about to speak?”

“Mmmmhuuuu-yuuu-sss.”

“Wow! Thats awesome!”

After our shower I dry us off and I head to the suitcase Derek brought. I dig through his clothes and found an outfit for Albert that I thought would look sexy on him.

I get him dressed and he sits on the couch. I pull my phone out to take a picture.

“Okay! Flex for me sexy!”

He taps at the couch to come sit with him but I tug off his boots and pull off his socks.

“Sorry I like seeing them.”

He wraps his arm around me and we watch a Halloween horror special together.

Soon it’s night time and I offer to cook for Albert but instead he gets up. He heads to the kitchen and starts cooking for me.

“You’re so sweet!”

As he brings out a plate, he starts to make a muffling noise.

“Uuuu— rr— muh-muh love.”

“Aww thank you. You’re my love too.”

After dinner, we both strip out of our clothes and full around for the third time.

This time Albert lets me insert a couple of fingers into his hole. I work it for a bit trying to be soft since he’s so tight.

I pull out and carefully insert my dick into him. His body quivers, I move back and forth inside of him.

He runs his hands all over me. He starts to moan…it’s a deep moan that sounds almost like Dennis’s voice.

“Harder Caleb! It feels soooo good,” he says clear as day.

I go faster and faster….

We’re both moaning so loud!

I feel myself about to cum inside of him and his dick explodes.

I lick his chest clean and we both fell asleep.

The next morning I wake up and almost thought yesterday was a dream.

I look over and Albert’s not in bed with me. But I notice a bunch of pieces of pumpkin are laying in the bed.

“Oh my god Albert!”

I rush out of my bedroom and run to the living room.

But I’m caught off guard when I hear a familiar voice say, “Good morning Caleb.”

I turn and see him… he has a human head! An exact match of Dennis…

“Hi…,” I say taking precaution just in case last night was a dream.

“Sorry, I wanted to surprise you. Do you like the new head?”

“Albert?”

“It’s me my love!”

I rush over to him and touch his face.

“God, this is… wow this is amazing!”

I kiss his lips and we keep kissing over and over again.

“So can I do that thing with my new mouth on your cock now?”

“Oh god yes!”

A Month Later…

“So you ready to meet our family?”

“Yeah but do I have to pretend I’m Dennis?”

“Yeah babe and you can’t be flirty with my parents around. It’s taboo.”

“Fine! But can we at least share a bed?”

“Well I guess I’m sure that would be fine since they only have my old bed.”

“Great! Now come give your uncle Dennis a kiss before we have to go!”

I roll my eyes and pulled Albert in for a long kiss.

“Oh don’t forget the pumpkin pie! I made it from scratch.” 😉

[pretty-little-mind33]

Tangerine x fem!reader

Summary: You've always loved your boyfriend's tattoos but panic when he offers to have you choose his next one.

Genre: fluff, blurb

Warnings: mentions of needles and tattoos, swearing, relationship insecurities

TANGERINE MASTERLIST

More times than you'd admit, you'd stare at Tangerine's tattoos—just as you're doing now—your nails tracing the designs on his forearms as you sit in his lap, straddling him.

You know he has more, some that spread across the muscles of his back and down his sides.

You want to touch those too.

"Why don't ya choose my next one, luv?" Tangerine asks suddenly, his hand coming up to push some hair away from your forehead as he admires your expression. Your eyes widen, and you shake your head, turning to look at him seriously.

"What?! I could never," you say, snatching your hand away from his skin as if it burned you, though you keep your position in his lap.

Genuinely confused, your boyfriend twirls his hand in your hair. "And why's that?"

"Because tattoos are so permanent!" you exclaim, your cheeks burning warm. "You'll have that on your body forever."

"Mm, yes, that's the point, a forever reminder of my favorite girl."

You say no again, your tone ending the discussion, but Tangerine knows you better than that. He smoothes a hand down your hair once more. "Is this not forever for you?" he mutters, the question genuine. There is no hint of annoyance or malice in his tone.

You feel your stomach sink and instinctively, you shift closer to him. "What?! No!"

Tangerine smiles and leans his cheek against your head. "Then what's the problem?"

You feel guilty as you take your lip in your mouth and your chew. What is the problem? The question plays on a loop in your head as you try to come up with an answer that doesn't sound stupid and childish.

"I mean, Tan, this feels like forever because I love you more than I need air, but nothing is really forever, is it? What if you wake up one morning and you don't love me anymore, and then you have a reminder of me engraved on your body?"

You pick at your nails, your voice going so small it breaks your boyfriend's heart. "And you know I don't want tattoos—so if you have one from me everyone's gonna wonder why I don't have one from you and—"

Tangerine suddenly presses his index against your lips and it's his turn to shifts so he's leaning up against the headboard, gripping your hips so you're positioned on his lap in a way that your ass isn't completely digging into his groin. 

His hand traces under your chin and then he cups your cheeks as he smiles. "My luv, I don't care what anyone thinks. I wasn't asking so ya'd also get one done, promise. Couple tattoos are incredibly cringey," he jokes with a scoff, then continues, his tone serious again, "now what's all this talk about me stopping loving ya? Ya gone completely mental on me now, darlin'?"

You look away, embarrassed. "I don't know."

Tangerine shakes his head and tuts. "Well, you're talkin' absolute nonsense. You're it for me, ya hear me? That's why I want a reminder of you forever engraved on my skin—because if by some hellish circumstances I can't have ya, I don't want anyone else. I'm yours and only yours."

He kisses your nose. "So, if you're willin', I'd love nothin' more than to have ya choose another for me, m'okay? Something small if you want, just for us."

You listen to him, taking in his words and then you smile and lean in to kiss his lips, warming up to his proposal so much so that a few weeks later, you stand to the side as Tangerine sits in the tattoo chair.

His arm rests on the small table to his left and his tattoo guy, a burly American named Dennis covered in tattoos, smiles at you. "So this is your little lady," he grins as he prepares the ink, "she is as sweet as you said, man."

Tangerine chuckles and beckons you over so you stand closer to him. "Isn't she?" he beams and turns to you. "Okay, show him, darlin'," he says and you hand Dennis a small paper where you'd drawn a small heart. It's simple. Nothing fancy—just a simple little heart that Tangerine wants on his wrist, almost hidden by his other tattoos but still visible enough for him. 

"Is it gonna hurt?" you whisper, worried for him, and Dennis chuckles. 

"I'm sure your boy can handle some pain," he jokes and Tangerine holds you hand with his other one. 

"I love you", he mouths, as his blue eyes shimmer with excitement at the anticipation of having something you'd drawn immortalized on his skin.

Once Dennis is finished with the tattoo and Tangerine can examine it, he turns and shows it to you. "Well? What do ya think?"

You barely blink. You can't tear your eyes away from the tiny heart drawing on his wrist and when you look up at him, knowing he has your real heart anyways, you break into a beaming grin.

"I absolutely adore it," you say honestly and those words have never made Tangerine as happy as now.

[httpiastri]

❣️ what pet names would ollie, paul, pepe, clem, liam, arthur and dennis call you? (not sure if this is the right way to request, ignore it if i’m wrong)

❣️ – send me a prompt and one/a few drivers and i'll tell you how i think they would react!!

ollie bearman

oh i totally see him calling you love in his silly british accent. especially when apologizing for something ("i'm sorry for being away for so long, love") or when asking for a favor ("love, could you pass the salt?"). just in general when he's being soft and romantic, to be honest. it just rolls off his tongue so easily, before he can even stop himself, and you always giggle at the fact that it sounds more like luv than how it's actually spelled. he's too british for his own good. i also believe he calls you honey, but more often just hun because it's quicker yet still has the same level of adoration behind it.

paul aron

i've seen people on here say he would call his gf kallis and i think that's adorable. like yk how he still lives in estonia and probably speaks estonian most of his time, so it would be so natural for that pet name to slip out of him. in english, though, i think he would like to go for something along the lines of my sweet or my dear. especially when hugging you or cuddling you, holding you close and whispering "you did so well, my sweet". he loves to add "my" as a reminder that you're his and no one else's.

pepe marti

call it cliche but he would totally go for mi amor. i imagine him coming home after a race weekend, when you're welcoming him home in the hallway with a big hug, and pepe kisses the top of your head with a whisper of "i missed you so much, mi amor". corazón could also be one, but i think he would love cariño, and he thinks it's so cute that he just finds himself smiling every time he says it to you.

clement novalak

mon trésor. he said it once, just to be funny and cheesy, but don't think he didn't notice the way your breath hitched in your throat when the words left his mouth. he doesn't speak his mother tongue often, so hearing him use it just for you? it sweeps you right off your feet. he also loves to go for a good old babe, it makes him feel really cool. especially in front of his friends lol.

liam lawson

darling. no doubt. it originates in the way that his mother used to call him by that pet name and something about it is just so dear to him. i also see him calling you idiot in an endearing way, like if you do something stupid he will just hug you tightly as he laughs, face nuzzled into your hair as he tells you about how you're "you silly little idiot... my silly little idiot".

arthur leclerc

arthur goes classic. mon amour or mon bébé all the way. idk what else to tell you, he's just a sucker for those. though i also really see him as someone who wants to call you something in your own native language just to be cute, something along the lines of darling/baby/love etc.

dennis hauger

excuse my norwegian for being a bit rusty but something along the lines of kjæreste, which (if i'm not mistaken) is the word for girlfriend/boyfriend but means more like "beloved"? i think he would love to speak to you in norwegian, even if you understand nothing of it. i also have a feeling that he would be good at using all kinds of pet names to be honest.

[sp00kymulderr]

it might be nice

Dieter Bravo x f!reader

Warnings/Tags/Notes: 18+. FEELINGS. Angst. love. just...feelings. Mention of f receiving oral, reader is a not a us-citizen (visa stuff), commitment and intimacy issues all round, did I mentioned feelings? This just kinda started writing itself, i appreciate there isn't enough Dieter in it but it is what it is. Unedited, unbeta'd.

Words: 1.1k

Summary: It's more than enough. Having what you have with him now.

"We could get married"

You look up from your book, drawn back from your far away to the sound of his voice. Dieter is looking at you expectantly.

Your eyes widen as you process the four words that just left his mouth.

"Dee, we…why would we…" You trail off, drawing your legs up and out of his lap, his thumb presses down on the arch of your foot once more before he lets it go.

The conversation had moved on hours ago. Over takeout you'd mentioned trepidation over being able to stay in the country, struggling with your visa and having no sponsorship since you couldn't seem to get a fucking job right now.

Dieter had listened, sympathised, and then eaten you out for dessert just to make you feel better about your situation.

It helped. He'd been pretty mediocre but extremely enthusiastic when you'd met, but now you'd taught him some tricks he knew just how to turn your mind off for a moment.

The conversation was finished the moment he put his mouth on you, or so you thought. He could help you pay for an extension but he wasn't influential or wealthy enough to sway the embassy into letting you stay longer.

"I'd bribe the fuck out of them if I could, you know that"

You did know that. You knew he'd do anything for you. He'd been saying it since the day he met you, once famous (more like infamous) movie star turned rehabilitated recluse with no one willing to be by his side until that day.

He'd met you in a Dennys, of all places. 3am waffles served to his lonely little corner booth because he found it hard to sleep these days, and he got hungry at random times. You took the late shifts because they paid the best, and you could be available in the day for calls from your agent that never came.

It hadn't been sexual at first. It hadn't been anything but a displaced, alone man and an exhausted, untethered waitress sitting in a booth and sharing free fries because chef made too many and they'd only go to waste. It had been whispered giggles, and sharing ridiculous Hollywood horror stories, and 'same time tomorrow' over and over again.

No one in LA had made you laugh. Not until you met him.

Dieter hadn't heard genuine laughter in years. Now he got to hear it every night.

Back in the now, you shake your head. He's being silly. He's trying to make you laugh again.

"Don't be stupid" You playfully shove his shoulder with your foot, but his face falls into a frown, and you feel a little crack in your heart at the sight. You watch as he stands, rubbing fingers across his forearm and muttering a little 'Stupid, yeah'. The tremor you feel inside you is nameless, and you will it to remain that way.

In the last six months of your knowing each other, there have been times when you've felt this same feeling. An ache at the thought that he could be anything other than happy. You'd long since left Dennys for the upward trajectory of the Cheesecake Factory but still when the late shift rolls around you feel a tug at your lips and a name on them, even when you'd seen him only hours before.

You're not an item, that's the thing. You're not a couple. Neither of you have ever said the words outright, no 'I want to be with you', 'I want to be yours'. Not to each other, at least.

It's more than enough. Having what you have with him now. It's enough, it's enough, it's enough. Enough that he will sit up all night long and read lines with you again and again and again. Enough that he tells you not to come over on his bad days but you do anyway, and hold him while he cries.

It's enough to be just this. Because more would only make it hurt more when he relapses, when you have to leave.

When you have to leave…

You close your book, set it down on the table that's strewn with pages for your latest audition. Last night he'd coached you through every single line, and then told you with passion just how perfect you were. You can hear him in the kitchen, and you know he's making himself a decaf latte with way too much caramel syrup and a dash of the kitkat sprinkles because that's what he always makes when he might be starting to crave something else.

That's how you know he wasn't making a joke. That's how you know your hurt his feelings. That and every look he's ever given you, every smile that lights up his eyes that's only been for you. That and the way his hands never stray far from you, always grounding himself with the touch of your skin to his.

"Dee…" You pad up to him slowly, watch as he tenses at your presence. Another prickle in your chest, you can't let him think you don't feel...what it is that you feel.

"Would it be so bad?" He asks without turning, the tinge of dejection in his tone making you reach out. "I'd treat you good, you know. We wouldn't even have to live together or anything…it can just be a way for you to stay. That's all. I didn't think it would be so bad for you"

God, you've had him right in your grasp this whole time. The two of you dancing around your feelings all because of fears you didn't even fully realise you had til now.

"I'd- I wouldn't even tell anyone you were my wife, if you didn't want me to. I wouldn't expect anything from it. I just…fuck,"

You turn him around with a pull to his arm, shake your head and bite back something hopeful and beautiful that inches up your throat,

"I don't want you to go"

Your arms are around his middle, a stifled sob as you bury your face against the soft, worn fabric of his favourite t-shirt - your favourite by extension because everything he loves you love too. He smells like him.

You breathe him in.

He smells like home.

You look up at him and smile. Not the pretty smile you give to casting agents - the one that makes you look perfect - but the big, happy, loving one he saw the very first night you two met in that Dennys at three in the morning on a random Tuesday. The one he gives you back is the same; he's smiled a thousand times on camera, in films and press appearances and award shows. No one else but you has ever seen this smile.

You take a deep breath. The crack in your heart starts in fusing back together.

"We could get married"

[itskybabes-blog]

Duke Dennis Drabble

Duke Dennis x fem!reader (no face claim but poc!reader friendly)

Part two: The Confession

Disclaimer: this is written by a dyslexic person – please forgive any grammar and spelling errors

TW: swearing, drinking and using derogatory language

Plot: After your big night at an AMP pool part (that you probs won’t remember tomorrow), you finally let your lil’ secret slip.

Word count: 672

ICYMI: part one

“What the fuck am I doing?” You slurred back in confusion. “What the fuck are you doing?”

You rise up from the bed and try to point your finger at him, but stumble forward because you was unaware of your own strength. Duke has to catch you before your pearly whites were scattered all over his floor.

“See, man,” Duke whines with you in his arms, “this is what I’m talking about”.

You move out his arms and squint your eyes at him, trying to focus on all three of him at once.

“Y/N, you can’t stand up straight. You got yourself stupid drunk and started twerking on everyone. Your nipple was fucking hanging out like you’s some fucking whore or sum,” Duke rants.

“Whore?!” – you sober up real quick – “You’re calling me a whore?” you exclaim back, shoving finger quotation marks in his face.

“Meanwhile, you’re here, throwing this stupid party full of thirsty clout-chasing bimbos who only wanna suck your dick, get your Ps and cut! Fucking lodging your tongue down some random girl’s face – you’d be lucky to not have herpes, right now!” You lay into him, using whatever left over competence you have. Dutch courage is certainly real.

“Whore?” You said again, this time with a soft chuckle - which we all know is not good. Duke knows you found nothing funny but couldn’t care because “you’re a fucking embarrassment!”

“Oh my fucking gosh, more fucking names,” you said with a dramatic sigh. You begin to pace around: “What else am I? A slut? A bitch? What else am I, Duke? Tell me!”

You end up in a couple centimetres away from Duke with a face full of fire and push him weakly (pathetically) away from her. His look of disgust softens – maybe he was being a little harsh.

So, he takes the punk move: “You know what, I don’t care. This is not even worth it, man. Fucking drunk!”

That one snapped a heartstring. Duke’s back faces you as he had his hand on the knob.

“You don’t care? You never cared about me, did you?” You come back at him.

“What?” He looked back, utterly confused you’d ever say that.

“You never fucking cared. I’m meant to be someone special to you – your best friend – and you only ever want me around when you don’t have a fuck buddy around. When you need a girl to make you look good when your hotline hoe ain’t picking up,” you start to spew some of your deep feelings.

Duke lets go of the handle and leans against the door. “Y/N, I-“

“You don’t fucking care about me. I fucking hop on a 2-hour flight weekly to see your ass and look all pretty for your stream. Then, you kick me out to entertain a next bitch, passing me off to the rest of the bros like I’m some community hoe. You never fucking cared about me. You never fucking did. You-“

“Are you jealous?” Duke saunters back to you, grinning. His diamond grill playing tricks with your hooded eyes.

“Huh? Where you get that from?” You feel your cheeks burn, turning your head to the side.

“As a friend, you care too much about my roster,” Duke tries to explain. He drops his head to try and make you look him in the eye, but you keep avoiding his accusatory gaze.

“You talking like we fucking or sum,” Duke continues to press you.

“Why would I want you, like, what? Like, that’s- Ha! Ewwww,” you try to act repulsed but you never got an A in drama. Your acting skills are subpar.

“Oh, OK. Just know: I’d drop my roster just for you.���

Your head whips around and look Duke square in his face. A goofy and toothy smile plasters across his face.

“You fucking play too fucking much. You can’t be trying to tease me and shit. Why would I fucking want you? You never cared about me before, why the fuck no-“ Duke’s pillowy lips press intensely on yours.

“Girl, shut up.”

“Yes, sir.”

A/N: here’s the second part! Now, I really hate writing smut so pls forgive me but I’m skipping over that. Pls enjoy this quick update :)

[jayke0]

Moron

Pairing: Blue Jones and Cecil Dennis x fem reader

Summary: kinktober day 15, Free Use

Rating: 18+

Warnings/content: Free use (though probs not as much as expected), drunkeness, alcohol mentions, degrading, blowjob/facefucking, p in v, protected sex (condom), oral (f receiving), squirting, threesome, hair pulling, crying, Blue is his own warning, name calling, Cecil just being an overall dummy and saying funny things, lmk if there's anything else i should add :).

Word count: 1,982

Credit: @automnepoet for proofreading ily.

…………………………………………….......................

As much as Blue hates to admit it, you don't belong to him. You've had enough other men's cocks inside you by now for it to quite frankly be stupid of him to say it; yet he still does, he still tells you every time he's balls deep inside you that you belong to him and him only.

You have someone else that says the same kinda thing, but it's just the other way round. Cecil likes knowing that he's yours, and unlike yourself, he actually sticks to it… not that he could find any other girl that'd take his pathetic ass anyway.

The man comes stumbling into the club as usual, bottle in one hand and red stained cloth wrapped around the other. He asks around for you of course, but when he's directed towards the head of the club's office he's faced with something he didn't want to see in a million years; you, cheek pressed harshly against the desk as Blue Jones pounds you from behind, and the worst part is that you seem to be loving it.

Cecil bursts in, making both of you stop in your tracks.

"Heyy! You can't do that! She said she's for me!" The disheveled man protests.

Oh my god.

"Cecil– ah– get outta here! You dunno what you're getting yourself int—" you're silenced by a hard thrust from Blue, who'd only seemed to stop for a second at the disruption before continuing to slam into you harshly.

The sight makes Cecil wince, and he can already feel the tears welling in his eyes as he wipes his face on his sleeve.

"This your other man huh?" Blue leans over you and sneers in your ear. "The one you like to just give yourself too? Without even a care for the money he doesn't make me?" Blue eyes the other man before gesturing for him to come over to the both of you. "She's told me how pathetic you are, you're just a bumbling moron looking for a quickie, ain't you?"

Cecil shakes his head quickly, but the tears start falling down his face as he sniffles and tries to hide it in his jacket. His cheeks are so rosy and flushed, strands of curls falling in his face as his shoulders shudder. It's a sight that you're quite familiar with, and one that makes you more aroused than it probably should.

You manage to look up at Cecil despite the other man's hand wrapped around the back of your neck and pressing you against the hard wood. "Cecil baby, c'mere." You gesture for him to come closer after smacking Blue's wrist to slow down, which he surprisingly obliges to.

Cecil stumbles towards you and puts the bottle on the desk. Feeling your arms wrap around his waist is somewhat reassuring to the man and he sighs shakily, showing you his bloody hand with a pout. "I tried fucking some other girl, but she got pissed when I swallowed one of her rings by accident when I was sucking on her fingers."

You try not to laugh, but it's incredibly hard when the man just naturally gets himself into moronic situations.

Blue isn't as ashamed to hide his laughter, a raucously snarky chuckle coming from behind you.

You manage to prop yourself up on your elbows and you stroke his wrists, carefully running your fingers over his. "I want you to join, Cecil, will you do that for me?"

You know he's a sucker for pleasing you… and for getting his cock sucked whenever he can.

"Only if he shuts the fuck up." He points at Blue, which warrants a hard thrust from the club owner.

You gasp and nod. "He will baby, he will. C'mere, lemme make you feel better."

Your hands start working on Cecil's trousers, which is hard to do when you're getting your back blown out by your boss, especially one that favours you the most. Eventually you pry his slacks open to paw at his cock. You wrap your hand around the clothed flaccid length while the other holds onto his good hand; you know he loves that too, it makes him feel wanted.

It doesn't take very long for Cecil to get hard, despite being face to face with his 'contender', and soon he's rolling his hips into your hand and begging for your mouth.

"Damn, you get excited quick don't you?" Blue mocks, which makes Cecil whine and buck his hips into your hand.

You feel him rest his bad hand on your head and a little part of you hopes he doesn't get any fucking blood in your hair. Your attention is drawn back to the pathetic man that's now whaling for you to suck his dick.

"Please baby! Please please, I've been good— well apart from earlier but that don't count 'cause I didn't even get to stick it in."

You moan softly, since you love it when he tells you he's been good, before you pull his cock free of his underwear, the tip throbbing and leaking already.

Blue's pace seems to stop for a moment as he watches you take the blunt head in your mouth, wrapping your lips around Cecil's shaft while the man in question whimpers.

The club owner's cock twitches as he observes you taking it deeper and deeper till your nose is pressed against the scruffy man's abdomen, unkempt pubes tickling your skin.

"Shit, honey, you're so good at taking it in the throat aren't you?" Blue's hand runs over your head and you nod dumbly, loving the feeling of being full at both ends.

"Let's see how you fair while I'm fucking your brains out."

You whine and choke as Blue starts thrusting again. The way you get pushed forward only pushes you further down on Cecil's cock, who lets out a strangled moan.

Eventually you get your bearings and you're able to wrap your hand around the other's cock and pull off of him, just to take him all into your mouth once again.

Both the men moan at that and you feel Blue's hips start to stutter as he struggles to hold himself together, curses and moans coming out through clenched teeth.

"God, I love watching you being used, you like it don't you? Like having both your greedy holes filled? Just like the whore you are." Blue tugs your hair, which in turn pulls your mouth off of Cecil with a loud pop and a gurgled moan from you.

"I do, Blue! Fuck I love both your cocks." You whine, scrambling to get your mouth on the other man again.

Cecil tries to rock his hips forward with desperate cries, but the club owner keeps your head firmly pulled back.

"Beg for it, beg to suck his cock again."

"Oh c'mon! I thought you said you were gonna be quiet—" Cecil complains.

You whimper and whine, but Blue's grip is tight on your hair, and if you wait any longer you're going to cum all over the harsher man's cock before you even get your mouth on Cecil.

"Please Blue— please lemme help him— ah— he's so desperate for it I can't help it!"

That seems to work, the man letting go of your head to let you go back to what you were doing.

Cecil feels like he's going explode if he doesn't feel the warmth of your mouth soon, but finally your lips are wrapped around him again and he can hold the back of your head; this time going not so easy on you.

He fucks into your wet heat with staggered thrusts, his head tilted back in pleasure as he uses your throat for his own gain, loud pathetic whimpers coming from his lips.

" 'atta girl, all for us to use—" Blue pants. You can hear in his voice that he's getting close too, which you're relieved about, because you think if he continues fucking you like this your legs are going to give out and he'll have to hold you up.

"I wanna use you like this more— please lemme do this more, it's so nice." Cecil begs, but you're unsure if it's for you or for Blue.

"Wonder how many others I can get to fuck you, maybe one in this tight little hole here—" your boss runs his thumb over your other hole and it makes you choke out a moan.

The constricting of your throat is enough to make Cecil spill suddenly, his cock buried so deep in your throat that it bypasses your taste buds and pumps straight down your esophagus.

Blue is next to fill you up, his growls and moans making you whimper as he grips your hips and fills the condom with his arousal, his head tilting back to enjoy the feeling.

Your legs are shaking by the time the men both pull away, but you're left still strung high on that cliff, hoping to God that one of them will take mercy on your poor throbbing cunt.

Your prayers are answered sooner than you expect.

Blue's arms wrap underneath your knees and pull you up against his chest, your legs crushing against your own chest with your throbbing heat on show for Cecil.

All you can do is scramble a little in Blue's grasp; if you know him well enough, you know what he wants, and it's going to make you scream and claw at his arms from being so sensitive.

"I see you looking at her. Go on, use that stupid mouth for something good."

Cecil is drooling at the sight of your cunt spread for him like that and he drops to his knees, gazing up at you as if you're some kind of deity blessing him with your presence.

Your arms hold onto Blue's, bracing yourself for the way Cecil's tongue is going to make you squirm, but before you can, you feel hardness bumping against your cunt.

How the fuck is he hard again already?

You don't have time to contemplate before your boss is shoving his thick cock inside you once more, fucking you open by bouncing you on himself.

"Shit, I love this cunt, honey."

All you can do is shriek and clench around him, the feeling being enhanced when you feel Cecil's tongue working on your clit… He may not be the best at holding his load or fucking, but he definitely knows how to use his tongue.

You're driven closer and closer to ecstasy each time you're brought down on Blue's cock, Cecil's tongue waiting for you mercilessly every time the other is buried deep inside your cunt.

Your body feels like it's on fire, and it's only a matter of a few more thrusts before you're crying out for both of them, your body squeezing and tensing on Blue so much that you're pretty sure it winds him for a second. You feel pleasure rush through your body and out of your cunt, and it's only once you open your eyes that you realise what happened.

"Oh sh–shit... I'm sorry, Cecil..."

The man looks up at you in pure awe before shaking his head, pushing his dampened curls out of his face as he wipes your dripping arousal from his skin. "I had a girl actually piss on me once, so that was a much better surprise."

You aren't able to hold back a laugh this time, though it's definitely a shaky one... and you even hear Blue let out a quiet chuckle.

You're about to let yourself down, but the harsher man tightens his grip on your thighs, and that's when you realise he didn't cum. "Ah ah, where'd you think you're going, honey? You still owe me another orgasm, and I think I got a lot more friends that would wanna get in on this too, sweetheart."

...........................................................................

Prompts by: @/flightlessangelwings

Tagging people: @cowboymarcs @sad1st1c-wh0re @poopoobuttsy @boredzillenial @mllover260 @simpforbritgents @saevenswelt @partssoldseparately @keira-kaz2y5 @theincredibleinkspitter @l-lune @red-hydra @queerponcho @summonthesoups @motleyfolk @steven-grants-world @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction

[teagballs]

I just read your Dennis fic, and if you were going to write a part 2 would you be able to make it that Dennis doesn’t immediately tell reader he likes her? He just starts acting really weird when she’s around?

Like maybe, Dennis Charlie and Mac are insulting Dee and reader says something like “that it’s not nice” then Dennis goes, “yeah that’s seriously not nice guys.” And everyone’s just confused cause like he was saying mean stuff too.

If it’s to much trouble or if you don’t wanna write this please just ignore this 🧍🧍

"like no one else" | dennis reynolds x reader

read part one here

authors note: ur mind anon UR MIND BROOO. this prompt was amazing and i had to do it but also it took me a month cuz i was busy. OOPS. i hope i did it justice cuz i took it and ran LMAO

requests open as always!! looking to do some charlie kelly stuff, so if u have any ideas for him lmk!!

cw: fem reader, mentions of objectification of women and the D.E.N.N.I.S system ofc, lil smoochie smoo at the end but nothing nsfw, 1.4k words

Dennis stumbled out of the restaurant, abandoning his date and this old life of promiscuity behind, seemingly. He walked down the street, pulling out his phone. He entered your name into his contacts, ready to confess everything. Ready to tell you how much you mean to him. Ready to love you. But then he stopped. His finger hovered over the call button and he thought, "what am I doing?" It was the emotion of the situation that made him act with such heedlessness. He didn't even know if you felt that way about him, if you felt the same deep connection he did. For him, it was a feeling like no other. It felt like you got him in a way no one else did. With understanding and kindness too. But to you? Dennis could just be a good friend to you. And if that was the case, what was the point in risking it all? He took a deep breath, shoving his phone back in his pocket. No, he shouldn't act so incautiously.

In the following weeks, Dennis found himself falling deeper and deeper for you. Every action you took, every word you spoke. He found himself obsessing over it. He tried not to come off as creepy - although that was hard, this was Dennis. His still kept his distance as usual, but now with a growing infatuation. He believed he was portraying this neutrality to you well, but this facade was challenged today.

"Y'know what guys, I'm really excited for this date tonight," Dee began to explain as she sat at the bar with Dennis, Charlie, Mac, and you.

"Oh shut up, Dee, nobody cares about your stupid date," Mac barked. Degrading her as usual.

It was water off a duck's back for dee, "You're just jealous I have a date Mac." She rhymed off before taking another swig of her beer.

"How'd you get this one to go out with you, Dee?" Charlie began in defence of Mac, "What'd you do? Steal his dog?"

"What? God no, what the fuck are you talking about?" Dee said.

Dennis didn't involve himself in verbally bullying his sister as he usually would. Usually, he would come in with the worst, most grating jabs. Instead, he silently observed how you scrolled on your phone, occasionally taking a sip of your drink, noticing how your brows furrowed ever so slightly in frustration.

"Even if you do go on this date, Dee, the only way you'll get him to stay is if you steal his phone or something!" Mac snarled.

"Yeah, you stupid bird!" Charlie said, which resulted in loud laughter from the men.

"God, would you just leave her alone, you two? Do you have nothing better to do?" You snapped at them finally. Dennis noticed your frustration and wanting to support and comfort you, he responded;

"Yeah, guys, leave her alone. You're both so sad." Dennis said in his usual 'I'm not wrong about anything ever and you're stupid for being wrong' tone.

Silence. Everyone, including you, turns to face Dennis. Did he just defend Dee? The sister he swore he hated?

"Dennis, what did you just say?" Mac asked cautiously and filled with confusion.

"I said leave Dee alone."

Dennis didn't really care all that much about Dee. Really, all her cared about was proving to you he did. He wanted to be on your side, always. To have your approval.

"Thank you, Dennis," you agreed. Dennis's heart swelled. 'God, what's wrong with me?' he thought. He had never felt this many emotions ever. Never mind for one person.

"That was weird, right? Earlier? When Dennis, like, stood up for Dee?" Charlie asked Mac.

"Oh yeah! For sure! I have no clue why he did that. I mean, just yesterday me, you, Frank, and Dennis were ragging on her for being a failed actress." Mac replied, causing laughter between the pair at the thought of this previous discussion.

"So... what changed?" Charlie puzzled.

"Everyone was there, except.. except for her." Mac hypothesised that when you were there, Dennis avoided talking poorly of Dee.

"But why? What does she change?"

Mac shrugged, "Maybe he's trying to D.E.N.N.I.S her."

"Huh. Doesn't really seem like his usual type." Charlie said.

Dennis was definitely not trying to D.E.N.N.I.S you. He made that distinctly clear in his mind. He wasn't following the steps at all, going out of his way to avoid flirtation with you, actually, to avoid raising suspicions. And the final step, 'separate entirely,' was most certainly one he didn’t want to follow. He wanted to spend forever and ever with you. Why? He didn't understand it himself. He was Dennis Reynolds, the Golden God! How come he was acting so pathetic?

You were starting to notice his weird behaviour. You had known Dennis for years. He was never this.. clingy? Not that you minded, really. You had always thought he was attractive, sure - charismatic too - but his general objectification of woman and lack of interest in a stable and long-term relationship certainly deterred you. Still, though, you couldn't help but feel your heart shatter every time he would talk about the girl he was planning to go out with next. You had grown tougher over the years of knowing him, accepting that he would never change, and he would never see you like that. This new attention from his was definitely appreciated, but strange.

This all came to head a couple of weeks into this behaviour. You and Dennis sat in the bar together on a slow Tuesday. You had been testing him slightly. You were saying things to provoke him - small things. Things that would usually lead to a disagreement or argument or him going on a long Dennis rant. But he didn't budge. He didn’t roar obscenities or call you an idiot or react negatively at all. He would just nod and smile. And then he would agree. You couldn't take it. Was it some cruel joke? To get your hopes up or make you look stupid? You didn't get the punchline.

"Alright, Dennis, what's with you lately."

Dennis freezes. He feared you had picked up on his feelings towards you. He feared this would be the end of it all, and he had ruined it, and you would leave and he would never see you again.

"What do you mean?" Dennis replied. He was lucky he was such a good liar. He played coy well. But you didn't back down.

"You've been acting weird. You just agree with everything I say, and you're hanging around me a lot and like you keep not making fun of Dee when I'm here. You're always looking at me too. Is it some sort of joke I don't get? Are you making fun of me? That's mean."

Dennis felt emotions, oh god. He located that he felt regret and frustration and guilt and guilt and guilt. 'Mean'. He wasn't trying to be mean. She thought it was some sort of joke, but no. This was how he really felt. He really wanted to spend all his time admiring you, he wanted to agree with you on everything, that's all he could think about for the past month. And for once in his life, Dennis was at sea for words.

"I... I didn't..." Dennis attempted. But he couldn't convey his words in a safe manner. In a manner that meant if you didn't feel the same way it would be okay and you could keep being friends.

"I think I'm in love with you." Dennis sighed.

"It was after that date. With that chick. What was her name? Candy? Karen? Doesn't matter." Dennis rambled. "It was then when I realised I never want to be with anyone else, if not you. I don't think anyone had ever understood me the way you have. And I just spiralled after then? I haven't stopped thinking about you." That would be a creepy comment if it wasn't something you had always wanted to hear from him.

It was your turn to be speechless. Instead of saying anything your eyes scanned his face for any indication of falsehood. Nothing. You saw and expression on Dennis's face that you had never seen before. One that could be equated to not knowing the answer. Clueless. Maybe afraid? You open your mouth to speak again but Dennis cuts you off and speaks first. Like he's trying to drown out a negative response. Like covering your ears to block out the sound of a gunshot; the damage would still be done.

Dennis looked at you, waiting for the gunshot.

"Dennis.. I feel the same way. Of course I do, oh my God." You finally say. Your voice is small and hoarse, like you have never used it before. Quickly, before anyone can say anything else, Dennis envelops you in a kiss. A kiss that isn't filled with lust, something Dennis isn't used to. His lips lean into yours in a desperate attempt to convey his gratefulness and love and devotion to you. You grip at his sides. You understand.

[ranbling]

Who thinks Abby is gonna be the “past Tommy” thing?

They had a bit in season 1 where she said she had an ex called Tommy but now there’s an interview saying they’re bringing back a season 1 plot… I can imagine this being very funny but also I don’t see Buck and Tommy breaking up soon :/

I miss Christopher - I hope he and Eddie make up soon. I surprisingly enjoyed the Eddie and Tommy friendship and kinda wish these two had been paired together cos they have far more chemistry than bt if they’re gonna go endgame… (I know what I’d prefer but I’m… not quite losing hope, but less delusional about buddie now)

do you have any spec on what might happen next ep?

I'm gonna be honest, the Tommy is Abby's ex thing sounds very stupid to me. It also makes it look like Tommy is an important part of the show. I doubt that anyone in the writers room remembers the random name they gave Abby's ex, but it could lead to a very funny situation, but I don't see how that would be the big hurdle.

Also, I said before 911 doesn't really build up break ups, Buck and Taylor being the only exception. It is totally pausable that we get BT breakup in the next episode (or the one after that).

I think that the soonest Chris will be back is the mid-season finale. I miss him too and I dislike seeing Eddie so sad.

Tommy and Eddie always had greater chemistry than Buck and Tommy. With Eddie, Tommy actually acts he like he likes Eddie's company. And the person he flew to Vegas wasn't Buck lol

I'm like 99% convinced we'll get an Eddie breakdown next episode, especially with all the callbacks to Eddie Begins. I hope they leave the Wilson family alone (even if it means Karen and Mara and Denny are not in the episode). I also think we'll see Chris and start the arc for Eddie and him repairing their relationship. I have no idea what unknown thing will come back from Tommy's past (and honestly, I don't even care. I do hope it's something bad about it). I think Bathena will start their house building journey. I have no idea about Madney's storyline, but maybe talks about what it was like having Mara in the house? And talks about a second kid?

[eldritcmor]

Hey look! It's incorrect quotes time

Storm: Graves had an unfortunate come to Jesus meeting

Graves: you pushed me down the stairs

Storm: you didn't get to meet Jesus

--

Someone: *uses Storm's full name*

Storm: *running and hiding cause oh shit*

Price: wait your telling me that's all I had to do.

--

Soap: I feel unsafe.

Storm: *hands soap a knife*

Gaz: well now I feel unsafe

Storm: *hands Gaz a knife*

Price: *just opens his mouth to speak*

Storm: *hands him a knife* can't feel unsafe with a knife in hand.

--

Ghost: *watching storm book it away from the los vaqueros base with like half the base chasing them* what did they do?

Gaz: something stupid

Storm: *after replacing all hot sauce with ghost pepper sauce* shit shit shit

--

Ghost: Have you guys seen Storm?

Gaz, Price, Soap: nope

Ghost: okay then *walks away*

Storm 5 minutes later: *drops from the ceiling only to get full on body slammed by ghost*

--

Storm: *driving down the highway and sees a cop. Starts speeding up*

Price: kid! What are you doing, kid?!

Storm: having a little fun *is racing a cop*

--

Storm: *Dancing around the kitchen, shirtless, with the broom. Like it's a rave while music blasts from their phone*

Price: *walking in to get a midnight coffee* kid, what the fuck?

Storm: *who hasn't stopped dancing* what? It's this or be alone with my thoughts while the bread bakes.

--

Ghost: *after witnessing storm have a panic attack* do you...want a hug?

Storm: you and I both know that will be uncomfortable as hell. I would like a fight.

Price: *walks in on them beating the crap out of each other.*

--

Graves: now we play the most dangerous game!

Storm: cattle prod tag!

Graves: the fuck is that.

--

Storm: *part of a drag show as a drag king at a club*

König: *recognizing them and taking vid*

Storm: *definitely trying to swipe his phone* delete it delete it

König: *has already sent the video to soap*

--

Storm: I wanna fight, do you wanna fight?

Ghost: I wouldn't mind one.

Storm: good. 2am the Denny's parking lot. Don't tell dad.

Ghost: you mean price.

Storm: yeah, dad.

-- Gaz: my name is nuuugget and I'm a big fat chiiiicken. Dammit. Soap: *trying not to laugh* Storm got you singing it -- Laswell: *Uses storm's full legal name to reprimand them* Storm: *immediately* yes ma'am, no ma'am, no it wont happen again ma'am. Price: Holy shit, the kid can be respectful. -- Storm: *Staring down another eldritch kid from their home town* The eldritch: Field Storm: Trees *Both nod and simply move on* soap: *fully expecting a fight* what? -- Storm: *picking up a screwdriver and throwing it so hard it sticks out from the doorframe out of anger* Ghost: but can you do it with a knife? Soap: Please don't encourage them -- Alejandro: *watching storm haul a full rack of cow ribs towards the base's kitchen* Should I be concerned? Price: *glancing up from the paperwork for the next op* Oh, not at all. Storm is benched due to some shenanigans. Your men will eat like kings. Alejandro: why? Price: because and I quote. "If I cant stab you in the ribs, I can still make a rack of ribs to stab" They stress cook. It's great.