#defining relationships
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xtrablak674 · 1 year ago
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If We Share a Relation We're Related
My moms was hard-core in her thoughts about family, and this was her position, I am not sure if her philosophies would have changed if she was still with us, but these values are at the core of who I am and how I teach her grandchildren.
She didn't believe in pre-fixes my brothers were my brothers, full stop. Not half, not step, not foster, they were my brothers. #period Expanding on these positions if my siblings had other siblings by their other parent she would look out for all of the children. Meaning if she got something for one child she would get for them for all.
My late youngest brother has six children, those kids have an older sister that wasn't his, but when I visited with the children I would see seven children. Following my moms philosophies, if I got something for the six than I got the same for the seventh child. How crazy would I look treating one child different because the law doesn't clearly define our relationship? As far as I am concerned she is my niece and I treat her as such.
The father of my former favorite nephew was mad at me because this nephew wanted to come visit with me for a week and wanted to bring his brother along with him. Per my previous statements I was totally down for all this, as far as I was concerned the more nephews the more fun!
My former sibling attempted to forbid me from this action, like I am not a grown ass adult who pays for all of my own bill. Last I checked, I never came out of his nut sack so he had no sway over what I do or whom I invite to my home.
Anyhow this was a point of animosity and he was particularly pissed when I shared photos of the children's trip. "That other boy ain't no kin to me, I don't want to see photos of him." Well I made it clear he will either see photos of everyone or no photos at all, because I wasn't cherry-picking photos based on his distorted perceptions of who is and isn't family.
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It was sad to me because this wasn't how we were raised, I wonder who had distorted his ideas of family and it was curious that I the pariah of the family had a better understanding of what family was and wasn't. If we share a relation than you're related to me. So my nephew's sister and brother were my niece and nephew and they could call me Uncle Trevor just like he does. Even though his younger sibling only visited with me for that one week they still call me Uncle Trevor and feel comfortable enough to be asking me to borrow money, which I constantly deny.
This all takes me to the conversation with the niece who will probably send me to my grave, the Florida-based one with the dead-weight boyfriend of nearly a decade. She's telling me how she's caring for her beau's daughter who stays with them every other weekend. She's talked about how the child has malnutrition, cavities and is addicted to coffee.
From my perspective all I see is red-flags, the trifling father of this child has never made my niece an honest woman, but expects her to care for his child emotionally and provide for her as if she was her own. I called bullshit and told her as much. I told her this child is clearly under some kind of ACS and once this neglect is discovered all the courts will care about is pointing fingers at the adults around the child. If she has no clear relation to the child it would be best for her to defer all decisions to the father and stay in her childless lane.
She went on to tell me she feels like a camp counselor to the child and that her roll has never been clearly defined for herself or the child. All of this is extremely problematic to me. I told her she is a parental figure, because if the child is ten and she's been with her dad eight years, she is all the child has known outside of her moms. I told her she has done herself a disservice to allow herself to be put in this undefined relationship purgatory.
One of the first thing I do with any kids I am interacting with is be clear about what our relationship is and what will and will not be tolerated within that relationship. I told her this is a theme of her life, continuing to exist within mediocre or sub-standard situations because they are familiar or comfortable. She is clearly a maternal or aunt-figure to this child and the dad is a fool for not making this clearer to both of them.
Both child and father share a relation her which by my definition makes them family no matter how blended. Its only through clarifying these relationships and acknowledging their existence can we grow and understand the importance of those in our life.
[Photos by Brown Estate]
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tinartss · 4 months ago
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akademiya shenanigans
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judas-not-that-one · 4 months ago
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being aromantic is so confusing because i literally have no idea how i feel ever, actually
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lazylittledragon · 3 months ago
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dood dump <33
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glassedplanets · 4 months ago
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more sketches! zs on the brain
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cdyssey · 4 months ago
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love how so much of the first half of carpe jugulum is about how much granny weatherwax is so fucking loved, even if she doesn't think that it's so.
her absence in lancre is unthinkable—an aching presence in the story. magrat has named her child after her and wants her to be the baby's godmother. she, nanny, and agnes drop everything to go and find her. they're constantly asking themselves, "what would granny do in this situation?" and then answering the question just as seamlessly because they know granny. they know her iron will and her unbending resilience, the way she fights against the darkness every single day.
she haunts the narrative because she is so deeply interwoven into the DNA of lancre and its people.
she is lancre, really, the unshakeable rock that the community organizes itself around.
and even when she's not there, her legacy is still deeply felt, living and thriving in all the people she has ever touched.
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wearecrowley · 1 year ago
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kuzoowl · 11 months ago
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Mitsukou and their lame matching earrings
inspired by this
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zhongli-lover-69 · 2 months ago
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harbingersecho · 6 months ago
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are we the sins we have committed? are we the things we have endured? [...] who are we?
[ref]
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thirdmonday · 1 month ago
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Define the Relationship - Chapter 15
~ if you keep acting this cute, i won’t be able to stop.
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wizardyandcheesesammich · 1 year ago
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He belongs with them
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He belongs with them
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HE BELONGS WITH THEM
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THAT'S THEIR KID, THEY ARE A FREAKING FAMILY.
And if anyone wants to take him away, they're gonna have to try and rip him out of their hands first.
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valtsv · 2 months ago
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silt verses au where they're all monsters trying to convince the others that they're a regular normal human whilst suspecting that everyone else is some kind of freaky entity:
- carpenter - werewolf
- faulkner - vampire
- paige - grim reaper/angel of death
- hayward - actually the only human*
- shrue - banshee
- VAL - ghost
(*for now)
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thesmokinpossum · 3 months ago
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If My Body Could Speak, Blythe Baird | The Godfather, Mario Puzo | My Father's House, Sylvia Fraser | To The Daughter Who Secretly Longs For Her Mother’s Affection, Lynne Shako | Storms from Jupiter, Wanda Deglane | DO NOT REPLY, @filmnoirsbian
#connie corleone#carmela corleone#the godfather#web weaving#this is...quite negative towards carmela i guess#so i just want to make it clear that i actually really love her as a character and i actually can understand how she became who she was#she was a woman born in the late 19th century raised not just in a patriarchal society but a CATHOLIC patriarchal society#who therefore grew up learning that she was primarly defined by her relationship to her husband and her capacity to be a 'good wife'#so i totally understand why she would take some type of sick pride in knowing that her husband never 'had' to hit her#but like...that entire part of the book was legit hard to read and Carmela was really not that much better than Vito there#so it's kinda hard for me not side eyed the shit out of her when she blame Connie for being a neglectful mom#like geez Carmela I wonder why your daugther might be struggling I'm sure it has nothing to do with anything you did or refused to do...#i'll say that she did end up being concerned for Connie and trying to help so she definitely deserves some points here#unlike Vito's dumbass who was just like 'it really hurts me to know that my daughter is being hit all the time but i can't do anything :('#'I'll tell her it's all her fault and that she deserves to be hit that will surely help somehow'#Vito really spent the entirety of this book being like 'nothing and I mean NOTHING matters more than blood (conditions very much applies)'#domestic violence mention
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pokimoko · 1 year ago
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haunting the narrative -> haunted by the narrative -> haunting the narrative -> haunted by
#adventure time#fionna and cake#simon petrikov#betty grof#petrigrof#fan art#fanart#art#digital art#my art#just a lil something something i did for fun#adventure time has always been the show that makes me want to draw (i have SO many AT drawings from 2015 it's ridiculous)#but now I'm coming back to that ye olde passion with new digital art skills and many more evil tragic thoughts (thank you fionna and cake🙏)#i couldn't get the thought about them haunting and be haunted by the narrative out of my head so I had to make some art for it#the caption for this was almost: so who wears the haunted by the narrative in the relationship?#they take turns of course because damn these guys really do be having that tragic romance huh. hot potato cursed existence#never quite on the same wavelength. always out of reach. their love the very thing that dooms them to be apart. a love defined by absences#like two ships in the night passing each other by. except they keep trying to seek the other out. and so end up going in circles#the tragic dance of madness and sadness. lead on and i shall follow. ....so anyway...these two amiright?#/might/ have to write something at some point...maybe...#because like... ghosts are my thing. and these two...well. even when they aren't haunting the narrative they are still ghosts#never let themselves live in the present and okay I'm going to stop now. enjoy the art byeeeee#...AND they'll never be at peace because they'll always be reaching for a version of each other that no longer exists and—#(i am dragged kicking and screaming from the room before i can devolve into a full blown meta)
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spotsupstuff · 1 month ago
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Gold is often connected to divinity in rl religions. In Buddhism, it indeed symbolizes enlightenment and such, and it is often kept pure in order to not ruin its brilliance. In Tibetan Buddhism, statues are gilded with it and the 5 tonne Golden Buddha statue in Thailand is composed of 18 karat gold, almost fully pure.
Within this world, I like to think that gold has caught the eye of the Anemons in a religious sense upon the (,,re/")discovery of the Void Sea. The golden waves of it shaped the perception of their world, from explaining the sun as coated in a layer of Void, to giving an idea of what "cleanliness of soul" should look like. Wheel Flowers are also attributed to the Void as sprouts of it, because of their ethereal gold coloration.
The feeling of the divine has however faded when the motivations behind handling of the Void went terribly south, replaced by the extremist corruption and greed of High castes.
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In other words, I wanted an excuse to draw Euros as a šarkan/змей.
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