#dearinternet

[ihatevirgomen]

Dear, internet ♡

It's been almost three weeks since I've last seen him, and within those weeks I have convinced myself that I do not like him but OH MY FUCKING gOD my soul yearns for him like a straved, famished, and thirsty little dog. I have tried talking to other people to distract myself from the thought of his presence but he's like a dick popping out of nowhere in my mind. I want him sooo bad but at the same time I feel like I'm lying to myself, maybe I just want to be loved by him or maybe he's just the only cool person in that damned shithole of a place(school) WHO CARES IF HE HAS LIKE WHAT?? SIX FUCKING EXES?! AND BESTFRIENDS WITH ONE OF THEM? AND WHO CARES IF THERE'S LIKE BAZILLION(about 3) PEOPLE CONFESSED TO HIM ON HIS CONFESSION LINK? obviously not me 😍(A part of my soul was crushed and pulverized into ego-lowering dust) I actually don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. Uhm anyway, I HATE HIM SO MUCH TO THE GUT. I HATE how i have this need to always check up on his posts or stories. I HATE how I only want him for myself. I HATE how I would draw on the back of my test paper just so he could notice it and check my paper. I HATE how I become cringy when it comes to him OMFG. I HATE HOW I BECOME SO DELUSIONAL HE MAKES ME I HATE HIM SO SO MUCH I WISHED I WAS HIS FIRST LOVE. I hate the fact that my body distance myself from him but my mind is always looking out for him. I feel like I've been bewitched, I don't think like this to a certain person before. What if I'm not delusional and he actually pulls up some witchcraft, that would be actually so cute. HELL NAW SEE THAT WAS MY DEMONS THAT WAS NOT ME 😭 It's unbelievable how alienated i feel towards my own body after liking him UHM?!.. I wish he takes responsibility of his existence and actually confess to and take me out on a date or idk..

-Love,🐈‍⬛

[looking-for-alice]

Is it bad that when I send you a text and you reply that I actually forget who you are... you are a distant memory to me... we have no connection.... no friendship... nothing... after four years.... I can’t remember your voice, your tone or touch....but what amazes me most is I don’t miss you at all... because I don’t know you.... and maybe I never did.

[lostwolf29]

In these crystalline moments, when I feel the true shape of the ends of my being, I can only be glad that my steps have led me this way.

This, this right here in this world, is my wildest dreams, coming true in front of my eyes, under my fingers, and running deep, deep down the core of my very consciousness, the message written so deep into my code that I can hear no sound but the heartbeat of death himself, and yet, I can hear it’s call.

This, that I write, in these, the crazy months, the madness months, where all falls to ruin, to chaos and entropy.

And yet;

These are the whispers that make my mind, that whisper in the depths of my soul, far beyond any mortal reach.

This, the story I write in the next 5 and a bit months, will determine all that I am, all that I ever will be, and all that I could be.

So, understandably, I’m nervous.

Heart flutterbeating, shrieking and hawing in sounds no human can hope to follow, the sun in my centre glows strong, fierce and bright, and yes that’s an oblique reference, keep up won’t you, we’re stealing time from the heavens themselves, rebuilding the world backwards from the beginning, remembering what we should not, forgetting what we really oughta have known, only we’re running too fast to stop this speeding arrow, so why not just;

Play in the slipstream.

It’s the little slips of the tongue that give it away, the self-satisfaction of knowing the job is well-done, that you could not have done a single thing better.

They smirk, glimmering with badness, simmering with mischief, watching blackly from the shadows.

If you take the time to watch them, they pause;

Regard you,

And, in their own way, pass judgement.

If you are lucky, they pass you by with never a glance more.

If you are even luckier, they may spring upon you and bear you away to a different place indeed, where everything you knew was topsy turvy, and the helter skelter of your old life passed you by until all you remembered was the new.

And if you are not lucky, then beware their gaze, for you will find a darkness far deeper than any the human mind can yet perceive.

What more could I possibly ask for, than this, right here: the chance to tell my story live, as it happens, as I forge my own path upon this world.

Oh, these steps wander ceaselessly across the plains of my mind. Sanctuary here is more than just a playing field. Here, each step brings you closer and closer to the end of the game, when all becomes clear. 

For from the moment we step, bare-footed, onto the grounds of Sanctuary, your every thought, your every wish and dream and hope, every secret longing and yearning, every stray, idle thought you have ever thought; is measured, weighted and judged by an unflinching court of strangers.

And with each step we take, we change, we alter to match the resonance that beats beneath us. We find the common ground and then all the world is ours to make of as we will.

When you can truly  and whole ly experience

               the   distortions

  Appa// ^ rent in the very fabric of a world’s being.

How can you fit back into the tiny shells of the life someone built to keep us small? How can you give up all you are to fit inside a ghost that breathes life in only one way? To fit back into a life the size of a tiny little cupboard under the stairs of the family time left behind??!

We are young, not stupid, not worthy of your instant dismissal. You see us and think we are <.fp20924′;- ??? {Insert dismissive slur in intended recipient’s language.}. We transcend your primitive boundaries, but we follow your codes, your rules and legislations, not because you coerce us ^though you do that as well, but because we choose to honour the system that is in place.

But heed us well, for this is simply an interim stage. We build for ourselves a world you cannot yet imagine. And because of us, one day you will be able to experience it, to feel for yourself the electric sparkle of the power that shapes us, runs the synapses of our mind’s eye, and courses through the river of our blood as easy as breathing.

One day, the world our words describe will come real, will step up out of the page to greet you, and you will know a little more of the secret that spells the end of Death.

For this, in the end, is our enemy, our teacher, our guide and our task.

To decode Death.

Oh the audacity, the nerve! How could we ever have considered such a rebellious act, in direct contravention of the operational standards, which are coded towards Life.

~Faith.

When you see the light above the mantelpiece, you will know for certain.

The moment you see and understand the reference and can trace it to this moment...

You know that you are come Home.

[lonelylorraine-blog]

Hello, Internet.  Are you lonely?

Hello, Internet.  

I’m Lorraine, I’m twenty-five, and I am very, very lonely.  

I feel compelled to note that there is nothing wrong with me.  I’d like to think that I am not crushingly awkward, present communication notwithstanding.  I have friends, including very close friends, although I rarely see them.  I have a high level of academic success -- a bachelors degree, and two graduate degrees.  I am an alumni of one of the most prestigious universities in the Unite States.  I have an extremely well paying job in a highly respected field.  I have a good relationship with my family.  I’ve never faced any notable physical or emotional trauma.  I’m neither remarkably ugly, nor remarkably beautiful.  My body is average, in both height and weight.  I have no diagnosed disabilities, physical or mental.  I have no allergies to speak of.  There is nothing wrong with me, and yet, I am still lonely. 

The last person I spoke to was an ex-roommate, asking me if I’d remembered to pay my electric bill this month now that she’s moved out.  It was not an in-person discussion, but rather an electronic communication.  The last person I spoke to in-person was the receptionist at my apartment complex, who asked to pet my dog.  Before that, a phone call with a veterinary office, and one with my mother.

I very rarely leave my home, these days.  I have food delivered.  I’m studying for a special exam, so I don’t have to go to work.  I live across the country from my family, and in the same town as the aforementioned friends.  I walk my dog frequently.  I spend almost every day alone.  It has been this way for months.  

I am not unhappy, per se.  I have faced unhappiness, at various stages throughout my life.  Depressions and anxieties have come and gone, in the way such things do.  I’ve felt the range of emotions, and have been unable to feel them at times; I’ve burned with rage, cried myself to sleep, and felt overwhelming numbness and regret.  My feelings aren’t faulty, or failing.  I’m neither particularly happy, nor unhappy.  But I am crushingly, oppressively lonely.   

I read somewhere that we isolate ourselves, or are alienated by others.  Is there an in-between?  Is there a time when we simply forget to build new relationships, or maintain the ones we already have?  What do you do when you wake up one morning, and realize it’s been days since you’ve heard your own voice?  

My isolation, and/or alienation is not deliberate.  I did not consciously decide to spend time with myself, or to withdraw; I am not the subject of a cruel ostracization  by my peers.  I am no victim, to be pitied or sympathized with.  I am just...suffocating, and lonely.    

[cylensouls]

Dear Internet, I've been thinking of ways to impress you. But I'm not sure how. I just want you to notice me Senpai ~

[thewebisdead]

She turned to the sunlight and shook her yellow head, and whispered “Winter is dead” #dearinternet #firstblog

[ihatevirgomen]

Dear, Internet ♡

I have this girl in my class and it frustrates the hell out of me because... I don't know but he is simply taking up the spaces of my mind to the point I ask myself if this bitch pulled some wizard shit on me. I mean yeah, he's cool or whatever, we have similar music taste and interest in this city full of shitty ahh but my heart don't thump and jump whenever he's a round but I do get shy and embarrassed. IT IS SOOOOO CONFUSING.

-Love, 🐈‍⬛

[kingrobery]

#DearInternet #PleaseStop #yougotjokes #nochill #oitnb

[lostwolf29]

#dearinternet

I am finally ready to be found. I have written only 1% of my story down, but I finally know it back to front, upside down and inside out. 

All that is left is to spend the rest of my life writing it. 

Here, have a quick dream in celebration;

Here in the darkness, where we dream the world into being, there is a rumble. 

Cogs, long unmoved, grind slowly into patterns. Their design is too flawless to allow them to deteriorate, but the habit of stillness is hard to break, and time creaks in the grooves between their blades.

Somewhere a long long way away, in time and place, two souls begin to exist, tangled up in each other in the surface groove of a very strange kind of rock, watched over carefully by the only two other souls in existence.

Worlds end all the time, many times over, coming into existence only to end again. But there is something different about The World ending. All we know, coming to an abrupt halt. Even when we experience its shadow on our doorstep every day, The End of Everything is hard to imagine, hard to accept, hard to reconcile.

As these two shapes coalesce and form into two men, twins to the women who came before them, the last sands start to drain from one particular hourglass. 

Imagining the impossible will no longer be a barrier to belief. This is the End Times, where only one mind will choose what happens after Everything ends.

There are two more souls to come, before the cave that holds the rock basin is full of light. Two more souls, to create something that didn’t exist, couldn’t exist before, but the moment it existed, became the only possibility. 

Here in the darkness, we dream of the void, and remember when we were alive. 

Here, we walk the streets of infinity’s deepest dreams, wandering through her brilliant nightscapes, feeling her heart whisper its most delicate wish. 

To not be alone. 

To have found the mirror to her timelessness, the window to something more.

To have found, finally, a companion to all her travels. 

To have found, finally, a place to rest her head. 

And the promise of Eternity.

[trevordmerrill]

Dear internet,

I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but you've gone from being a new wonder of the world to a dark stain on society. You have amplified our tribalistic tenancies so exponentially that you have just devolved into a breeding ground for blind hatred towards another group of people. Everyone can sit safely behind their keyboard and rally with like-minded individuals as they spew generic and pointless hatred towards another group of people, just so they can feel better about themselves. Whether it be Democrat vs Republican, Xbox One vs PS4 users, Mac vs PC, Android vs iOS users, Yankees fans vs Red Sox fans, Giants fans vs Patriot fans, and everyone’s favorite, black vs white. We used to have reasons why we repped the groups with which we label ourselves with and could actually give a logical breakdown, but now people just find a random group of people and begin mudslinging at the opposite side before getting any information. Our society no longer debates with facts because of you (ironically since we have more information than ever now), instead we have devolved into making everything personal and attack all those who don't subscribe to our belief system through name calling. The most recent trend in America is all about acceptance and tolerance, but as a country, we have never been LESS tolerant of other people. Differing sides of things are completely acceptable as long as we know the reason why we are on the side we are on and are willing to listen to the points of the other side. Somehow, because of you internet, everything got REALLY personal. Remember when we could bash an idea all we wanted, giving our arguments for it's faultiness instead of making every stupid little thing personal? Yeah, me neither. I mean, I feel like I am one of the few people left who uses reasoning and research to make decisions rather than just arbitrarily choosing a side and then proceeding to vehemently defend it to the death. "I don't support universal health care, so I will proceed to cuss out everyone who does with a vengeance" is not an acceptable way to behave. Our political parties, our sports teams, hell, even our flipping phone OS now define us as PEOPLE. “Oh, you’re an Android user? You must be an inbred cow farmer”. Have we become so complacent and bored as a country that we have to make our neighbors our enemies rather than keeping our real enemies in the world as our enemies? Maybe these pointless and petty arguments are just easier for people to handle than thinking about the real problems of the world. It’s always the same: “It’s all the fault of those damn [Republicans] [Democrats] [Blacks] [Whites]! ATTACK!” or “What kind of inbred dumbass would want to be a fan of [Giants] [Yankees] [Apple] [PC]? ATTACK!”. Why worry yourself with real change when you can just play make believe and always win? I guess, internet, you aren’t actually the problem, but you just amplify and expose the real problems we have in society. The single largest problem our society faces today is getting out of the Us vs Them mentality. Who knows, internet, maybe you will finally achieve your original purpose and unite everyone.

[cylensouls]

Dear Internet, Sorry about my first post.. I don't know how to do this shit so I just wrote what came to my head. And as you can tell by my horrble grammer, My thouhts are kinda all over the place. I dosn't make anysense. Yeah this gonna be one of those shitty blogs the no one will ever care about cuz its compleate shit. Oh well. I mean I'm not the intersting or I'm I? OoooOooo??

[lolimiggi]

#dearinternet #iggilovesyou

[onefootdowntherabbithole]

#daysofar #excitingIknow #fascinating #iknow #atleasttheweatherisnice #prettyday #outside #sun #coffee #dearinternet #moreuselesscrapforthecollection #yawn

[ihatevirgomen]

Dear, internet ♡

It's been a while since I've logged in into this horrifying cringe account. I have realized a lot these couple of months and as for the girl I've talked about in this account she's quite disappointing I must say. My head was full of sweet delusions that now my thoughts about her are rotten, she is now merely another boring being. Seeing how she didn't do her responsibility on the group activity we both are in and the other unfavorable things, I might have been a little too generous with my standards. Her presence that would've sent me to silence is now replaced by annoyance. I hate myself for liking someone so much that it takes up all the spaces in my head and for what?

[tvonstaticyes-blog]