#dean and emotions

[silver-stake-through-the-heart]

Thing is Dean absorbs the lecturing words his family throw at him:

Sam, 4x14: You're too busy sitting around feeling sorry for yourself. Whining about all the souls you tortured in hell. Boo hoo.

-> he's never shown talking about Hell again on screen

Bobby, 4x22: You stupid, stupid son of a bitch! Well, boo hoo, I am so sorry your feelings are hurt, princess! Are you under the impression that family's supposed to make you feel good?! Bake you an apple pie, maybe? They're supposed to make you miserable! That's why they're family!

-> he never tells anyone about how Sam betrays him after that

Sam, 7x13: Look, man, she was not yours. Not really.

-> he doesn't talk about Emma again (except in that script)

[shallowseeker]

Dean's farewell tour + avoiding Cas, Part 1

SPN 14x11, 14x12, 14x14:

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

When Dean has decided to "check out" of the fight in 14x11 Damaged Goods and 14x12 Prophet and Loss, we get a wonderful tale of leaning on your brother and mother to find strength to face your battles. Dean goes on a little farewell tour and starts to open up to friends and family, mustering up physical affection and attempting the important emotional conversations surrounding regrets/love that he's always wanted to communicate with them (outlined below).

Cas n' Jack, sidestepped:

But when Dean decides to throw himself into the ocean, he leaves out Cas and Jack. Why? Because, as he admits in 14x12, he can't afford to get "shaky:"

Sam, for all his emotional analytics, fails to recognize the gravity of this giant omission. Omission is admission. Cas and Jack are the things that would get Dean not to jump into the ocean. That's why Dean is avoiding them. Dean doesn't want to get emotional and change his mind. Sam, bless him, has a great deal of cognitive empathy, but he misses giant neon signs like this pretty often during the course of Supernatural. (Geez, I love that about him.)

Here, Sam is stuck in a childish arrested development. That is, he assumes Mary and Dean are mostly focused on Sam himself and thus Sam holds the most sway on family decision-making.

Sam often seems to lack a high degree of natural emotional empathy. He has to work at it. (I think Dean and Cas seem to connect more with other characters: they often showcase true emotional empathy and are typically a little more insightful. Soulless Jack aside, this is a trait Jack shares with Dean and Cas.)

Sam will miss the point when Cas tentatively suggests that he himself speak with Dean. With time ticking away, Sam'd rather have Cas on research duty, and that's not impractical, per se…

Next to Sam, Cas is THE guy for coming up with creative solutions, so Sam wants him looking for Sergei and angel-speed-reading through the Lore. The only time Sam breaks with wanting Cas on strategy will be in terminal SPN, in episode 15x17: "Just get home."

///

At the end of 14x11, Dean will tell Sam that he's the last person he can be around, perhaps the even only person who can talk him out of this. This could be true. So why is Dean avoiding Cas then?

A) Cas holds more sway than Dean can admit to others, it's a sway he can barely even face.

B) Maybe Dean believes Cas can't talk him out if it, but Dean can't emotionally handle a big farewell without accidentally telling Cas...things. The last time Dean tried, there was a time pressure: Amara. Dean was able to safely deliver a neutral best friend-brothers-in-arms speech. This time, he fears it won't go that smoothly.

Now, he's either afraid he'll say too much to Cas...or too little. It's distinctiy different in character to the others. Dean even seems to get a little flustered in 14x12 when Cas calls him on the phone.

It’s a glaring tell.

///

Sam:

Previously, in 14x11, when Dean is processing his goodbye to Sam, he hugs him, something that immediately sets off Sam's spidey senses, as they're not a "huggy" family. Dean hugs Sam:

///

Sam sounds the alarm to Mary (and presumably to Cas):

///

Later in 14x12, Dean is able to drudge out his practices, heavy Big Goodbye speech to Sam, apologizing for their childhood and letting loose a lifetime of regrets. Indirectly, he's telling Sam he loves him. This is a pretty remarkable show of emotion, one that Dean will mirror with Mary during their cooking adventure.

Dean digs up his deepest emotions surrounding his history with Sam and opens up about them here:

///

Donna:

In 14x11, with Mary and Donna, Dean is partially motivated to make use of the cabin, but he emotionally cannot resist including Donna is his goodbye tour.

They chat about relationships and kids over burgers.

Dean resists big emotional speeches with Donna. Despite her ditzy act, she's too astute.

But he is warm and physically affectionate--this is Dean's actual default when handling emotion he can actually bear to handle:

///

Mary and Cas next...

[souporsaladnatural]

Obsessed with the sudden shift in Cas' willingness to say insane romantic shit to dean in season 8. A couple of seasons ago, he would tell dean that they had a profound bond to his face. That everything he did, he did for Dean. Now? He's hesitating. He clenches his fists to avoid hugging Dean back in purgatory. He stutters and looks away before saying he stayed away from Dean to protect him. When asked what broke through heaven's brainwashing, he looks away and says he doesn't know. It's so interesting to me

[torisprlng]

DEAD BOY DETECTIVES | THE CASE OF THE VERY LONG STAIRWAY

Sorry. No version of this where I didn't come get you, is there?

[bloodydeanwinchester]

DESTIEL IN EVERY EPISODE → 8x02 what's up, tiger mommy?

cas, buddy, i need you.

[butterscotchx98]

So…how was ur day ?

The ring might’ve switched owners :D

[the-mpreg-guy]

the hill that i will die on is that cas would have never said he loved dean if he had to deal with the consequences of it afterwards, meanwhile dean (who was SUPPOSED to tell cas he loved him in the original crypt scene script) would have eventually worked up to saying it without external pressure

[wigglebox]

Destiel Pride - Day 21; Most faithful mirror

[inacatastrophicmind]

Happy 3 years of Destiel becoming canon

[disgutinggirlreads]

I totally understand not shipping wincest like okay maybe fictional incest is not your cup of tea and I get that

what I can't understand is when they act like we're fucking insane and there's nothing wrong or weird in sam and dean's relantionship like BE FOR REAL

even if they're not fucking they're still obsessive and codependent and WEIRD about each other, their love and attachment RUINS them for anyone else, that's why they're only able to have serious romantic relantionships when the other is away or fucking DEAD

they're AT LEAST emotionally incestuous like please

[silver-stake-through-the-heart]

Dean, to Anna (4x10): Feelings are overrated, if you ask me.

Dean, to Sam (4x10), crying: How I feel... This... inside me... I wish I couldn't feel anything, Sammy. I wish I couldn't feel a damn thing.

Cas, to Dean (4x22): What is so worth saving? I see nothing but pain here. I see inside you. I see your guilt, your anger, confusion.

"Emmanuel", to Dean (7x17): Well, it doesn't matter why. (…) No. You're not a machine, Dean. You're human.

Cas, to Claire (10x10): Angels are able to find those who pray to them. (…) It doesn't have to be a formal prayer. I could pick up on a– a longing…

Cas, to Jack (15x13): You know, Dean, he– he feels things more acutely than any human I've ever known.

Cas, to Dean (15x18): Everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love. You raised your little brother for love. You fought for this whole world for love. That is who you are. You're the most caring man on Earth. You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know.

[scenteddean]

I've had this 90% finished since the beginning of january, but thankfully have been dragging my heels on finishing the rest just to be done on time for a very special day <3 happy bday smart angel

[souporsaladnatural]

yea dean and cas love each other but have you considered how much they like each other?? How theyre literally best friends???? How they literally like to hang out and talk and watch movies together??????? HMMMMM???????

[casdeans-pie]

So it's like this: Dean gets out of bed one night to go have a pee at 3am and he's actually still half asleep when he shuffles back into the room (because there are no more monsters to hunt and he doesn't have to be alert like a feral cat anymore) but when he gets to the doorway there's a lamp on and Cas is sitting up in their bed. The lamplight is warm and inviting and the bedsheet has slipped off of Cas's bare chest and his frowny concentrating face is lit up by his phone, and Dean knows He Just Knows that Cas is playing that weird little farming mobile game that he's addicted to where he's constantly worried about harvesting his crops and feeding his cows. And it just hits Dean full in the chest that it's 3am and there are no more monsters and this is their bed and their room and their lamp and Cas is here playing his silly mobile games with the same expression he gave to reading ancient texts waiting for Dean to come back from his mid-night pee.

He gets to have this. He loves him.

Dean doesn't even realise he's crying until the image of Cas gets too blurry with tears to see anymore and he misses him and he has to roughly rub his eyes to clear them and when he looks back Cas has put the phone down and he's holding his arms open.

Dean launches himself into them.

[bloodydeanwinchester]

Confession Scene Random Moment: let's pregame november 5th with this random moment from the confession scene! castiel is well and truly crying now as he makes his big declaration!! dean is beginning to realize that something BAD is about to happen—cas is saying all these nice things to him because he's about to sacrifice himself for him!! it only gets worse from here!!

[torisprlng]

DEAN + CAS || CHARLES + EDWIN