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therealcocoshady · 9 months ago

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Recovery - Chapter 8

Eminem x FemReader (Y/N) fanfiction

Summary : Y/N reconnects with an old friend and her sobriety is seriously challenged.

Tags : Angst, Comfort, Fluff

CW : Bullying, Alcohol, Drugs, Mentions of nudity

TWO WEEKS LATER

To say you had a bad week would be an understatement. It was a terrible one : everything that could go wrong basically did, except for the moments you spent at the studio.

As it often happened, you missed Simon terribly. You were feeling touch-starved, and you just missed being in a relationship. Granted, you had amazing friends, but it just wasn’t the same. Work wasn’t a piece of cake either. You’d had to attend several faculty events and, as was often the case in academia, almost everyone over-indulged on alcohol. You found yourself missing the days where you could party and dance the night away. You had never been much of a party-girl, but now that you were sober, you missed it sorely. You were supposed to work on your doctoral dissertation but found no motivation to work at all.

Only three things were able to get you out of your bad mood : the few hours a week you spent at the studio, dinner time every evening with Talia and Jamal, as well as the perspective of seeing an old friend who was coming back to Detroit.

Two weeks prior, after Marshall brought you back from the studio, you had received a text from an old friend named Cassie. She was the first person you befriended at Michigan State University, four years ago, when you were an exchange student. Your friendship was the living embodiment of “opposites attract”, as she was everything you weren’t : funny, easy-going, sociable, the life of the party. It was also a good partnership : you helped her study and she helped you socialise. She was the one who took you to some parties and showed you cool places in the city. In a way, she was a good influence : she pushed you out of your comfort zone. Whenever you were with her, you found yourself to be more bold. Unfortunately, you hadn’t seen her in a while, as she moved to another state to follow her then-fiancé, now ex-husband. Cassie had texted you to tell you she was coming back to town and that she’d love to see you. Generous as ever, she offered for you to spend a couple of days in her suite at a fancy hotel, promising you a good time and some spa. You were extremely happy to see her again. When she left, you had tried to keep in touch, but she seemed extremely busy. Now though, she was considering coming back to Michigan after a divorce and was actually in town for a job interview.

Her offer for you to spend a couple of days with her was also a nice way to give Talia and Jamal some space. They would never admit it, but you figured they would appreciate spending some time at the house, just the two of them. There was only one drawback : Talia seemed a bit wary of Cassie. You knew she never liked her, but being the classy lady she was, she refused to drag you into their drama. She simply told you to enjoy yourself.

On Friday night, you joined Cassie at her hotel, after she was done with her job interview. She seemed ecstatic to see you.

Ma chériiiiiie, she shrieked as she took you in her arms. It has been so long !

I’m so happy to see you, you said sincerely.

I have planned the most amazing weekend for the two of us, she said giddily.

Really ? What do you have in mind ?

First, we’re going to have a nice five stars dinner brought up to our room, and tomorrow, I’m taking you to the Spa, shopping and then, I was thinking we could go to a party together, she explained.

That is a lot, Cassie…, you said.

My treat, she assured you. Let my divorce settlement money be useful !

I can’t accept that.

Of course you can ! You’ve done so much for me, baby, it’s time I paid you back a little ! Some people I know are throwing a party and you’re going to love it.

You hummed. Cassie was a ball of energy, as always. You half expected her to be depressed because of her short marriage that just ended, but she was beaming with happiness. At dinner, she explained that she caught her husband cheating with a colleague. She got a lot of money from the divorce and was ready to move on. She had always been like this : always seeing the positive side of things. During the conversation, the talk shifted to your breakup with Simon, although you didn’t go into much detail as to why the relationship ended. Cassie was your friend but you didn’t want to either bore or worry her by talking about your struggle with pills. If you were being honest, you also didn’t want her to think poorly of you. As amazing as she was, you knew she could be a little judgy, at times.

It’s a shame that you guys broke up, but maybe it’s better this way, she said. You can do better anyway.

Do you really think so ? you asked as you bit your lip.

Of course. I mean, he was great and everything, but I don’t know… You could probably do with someone a little more fun. He was always so serious, she said.

I don’t know… I liked that about him, you said with a sigh.

Of course you did, she continued. But I’m sure we can find you someone better. The party I’m taking you to tomorrow will be the perfect place for you to find a man.

I don’t need to find a man, you scoffed.

Of course you do, she giggled. It’s been months since the breakup. And knowing the good girl you are, you probably haven’t got any action since. You don’t want spider webs to grow in your vagina, now, do you ?

You almost choked on your water. God, she could be so straightforward when it came to sex. Or any other topic, for that matter. Once again, she was the complete opposite of you. Anyway, you didn’t bother responding to her comment about the good girl you were. And you were absolutely not going to mention your movie night with Marshall. Thankfully, the conversation shifted once again to another topic. After all, the two of you had a lot of catching up to do.

You barely got any sleep that night. Not that you weren’t tired from your week - you were actually exhausted - but you spent the whole time talking to Cassie and catching up on her life. This girl had a talent for making life seem exciting and glamorous. She always had things going on, always being the one with the most amazing stories to tell. You felt a little dull, next to her.

The next day, you started by having a fancy breakfast in bed before she dragged you to do some shopping. The department store is where you noticed she was seriously intent on spending money. She kept on grabbing items, not even bothering to look at the price. Meanwhile, you failed to find anything. You either didn’t like it or it was out of your price range. Eventually, she decided to take matters into her own hands and initiated a makeover session with the pretext that you needed to look fancy for whatever party she wanted to take you to. Of course, it was Cassie, so you weren’t exactly surprised when she told you it would be extra. She insisted that you try on a Sandro black dress, even though you weren’t convinced. It was on the shorter side, with sequins and definitely showed a lot of skin. Not to mention that it was extremely expensive. You liked shopping and dressing up as much as the next girly girl, but you didn’t come from money, so spending $300 on a dress wasn’t something you considered. However, to her, it seemed like it was no big deal. She didn’t even blink when the sales assistant told her about the price. “We’ll take it”, she simply said, before asking for bags and shoes to match the dress. Once again, she spared no expenses. The shoes she selected for you to wear were from Jimmy Choo, costing almost $800, with a matching clutch that was just as expensive. She even went the extra mile and selected a pair of gorgeous diamond earrings to complete the outfit. She was extremely happy with the outfit. So much so that you didn’t really dare tell her that you felt ridiculous in these clothes. It was the least “you” outfit ever. “If Talia could see me, she would laugh in my face”, you thought. But at the same time, Cassie was so generous and confident that you wanted to give it a try. After all, maybe you needed to get out of your comfort zone. After the shopping spree, you went to get pampered at the hotel spa. You both got your hair done, as well as beauty treatments for the face and body. You had to admit it felt good. Plus, she seemed to enjoy giving you the princess treatment. To be fair, you also enjoyed getting it. It wasn’t every day that you could get a massage, a facial and a new hairdo.

The both of you went back to the room to get ready for the party. You didn’t know much about it, other than the fact that Cassie was extremely excited to go. It was supposed to be held in an exclusive location, with “only the best people, food, music and drinks”. When you stepped out of the bathroom, she clapped and shrieked in excitement.

You have never looked so sexy, Y/N !!! If I had your ass and your breast, I’d dress like that everyday !

You were glad she liked it, although you thought you resembled a Bratz Doll. You hardly ever wore makeup anymore, but there you were, with eyelash extensions, foundation, bold lipstick and, hell, even highlighter on your cheeks. Not to mention the outfit. “The dress is too tight, too short, and the heels are definitely too high”, you thought.

Are we sure about the heels, Cass ? You asked nervously. I might break an ankle, here…

You’ll be fine, she said. Plus, God knows I’m not one to criticize, but… You’re way too short to wear anything lower anyway.

And there was the thing you liked the least about Cass : the way she would sometimes ignore your insecurities and dismiss them. Back when you were in school together, you couldn’t count the times when she would comment on your acne scars, your hair or even your weight. But she was your friend and you knew she meant well. It was her own way to care for you. She had your best interests at heart and she wanted you to be nothing but the best version of yourself. Besides, you knew that she was just as hard on herself. She was constantly under her own pressure to look good, do good and be with good people. But that was what made her thrive, so you figured that, maybe she was right.

You look stunning and those basketball and NFL players are going to get in line to get your number, she said as she placed a strand of hair behind your ear.

You look amazing too, you said with a shy smile.

I know, she giggled.

But wait… You mentioned… sports players ? Who exactly is going to be there ? Do you know them ?

You’re getting in your head, baby, she chuckled. I know a few people. As for the others, it’s just a few friends we haven’t made yet. Anyway, I have something for you.

She grabbed her handbag and took out a vial.

I know how nervous you can get in social settings. This will help you relax. We are going to have the best night ever, she said with a wink. All you have to do is inhale this.

She placed the vial in your hand and you looked at her, intrigued.

What’s that ? You asked. Essential oils ?

Almost, she hummed. Just trust me, ok ?

Do you promise it’s nothing weird ? You asked as you bit your lip.

I would never give you anything dangerous, she said as she rubbed your shoulder. You trust me, right ?

You nodded with a smile. Of course you trusted her.

Now, let’s have a glass of champagne, just the two of us before leaving, ok ? We didn't even toast to our reunion last night !!!

I shouldn’t drink, you said as you avoided her gaze. I’ll have water but go ahead.

Don’t be a boring, Y/N, she giggled. God, you can be such a dud sometimes. One glass, it won’t kill you. I’m going out of my way for you to have a great time, here.

You felt your heart strain. You didn’t want to be ungrateful. After all, she was more than generous to you and she did go out of her way for you to have a memorable weekend. You didn’t want her to think you were a dud. Besides… One glass of champagne was ok, right ? It wasn’t as if she was handing you some pills or offering for you to snort cocaine in her hotel room. Plus, it was Cassie, of all people. You took a deep breath and sighed.

Right. I’m sorry. Champagne sounds lovely, you said.

She smiled and ordered champagne from room service. When it came, it wasn’t just two glasses : it was a whole bottle. Cassie laughed it off. You had your first sip of alcohol in months. You were never a huge drinker, but you had to admit you sort of missed it. You made small talk as you sipped on your glass and she told you that one of her motives to go to the party was to see a guy she had a small crush on. Some Pistons player, apparently. This made you smile. Cassie had always been quite the seductress, even though she got engaged and married quite young. She was the flirty type, even with you. This was part of her persona, and people were here for it. She was the very definition of irresistible. The girl you befriended, that you knew you could never be. You knew there was nothing wrong with you and, most of the time, you were ok with who you were. As years went by, you had come to appreciate being the rather shy, sometimes dorky girl next door who could be seen as quite cute when she made an effort. You would never be an ethereal beauty like Cassie and you were fine with it. Before you knew it, you were on your third glass of champagne.

We’d better go, you said with a giggle. I’m on my third glass already.

You’re right, we’ll have plenty of bubbles to drink when we get to the party anyway, she said.

Not quite what I meant, Cass…

Just enjoy the evening, baby ! Now, time for you to use that vial. Just put it close to your nostril and sniff, ok ? she directed.

You nodded and did as she said. After you were done, she did the same. Less than a minute later, you were filled with a sensation of euphoria and relaxation.

I don’t know what it is, but this is the shit ! You giggled.

I know right ? If you feel anxious, just do that again. I promise, you will have a great time !

A car took you to the party. It was definitely a fancy event. You didn’t know anyone, but Cassie did, and she introduced you to some people. You ended up discreetly sniffing the magic vial a couple of times, taking some time to relax. Before you knew it, you were standing alone as your friend was in deep conversation with a handsome gentleman who, you guessed, was her crush.

I can’t believe such a beautiful woman is standing here without a drink, a man said as he placed a glass of champagne in your hand.

Thank you, you giggled.

The stranger was quite handsome. He was tall, blonde, with gorgeous hazel eyes. He was dressed in a tux and arbored a charming smile. At that point, you were just a little tipsy and definitely relaxed. You greeted him with a smile and thanked him for the drink.

May I say you look absolutely stunning, he complimented you. That’s quite an outfit.

Thank you, you said with a smile. You don’t look too bad either.

I don’t believe we’ve been introduced, yet. I am Jared.

Nice to meet you, Jared. I’m Y/N, you said as you extended your hand.

You expected him to shake it but he took you by surprise by kissing it, which made you all giddy. You made small talk and he told you he actually played for the Detroit Lions, taking no offense when you confessed that you had no idea who he was, and that you didn’t watch a lot of football.

So, what brings you to this fundraiser for the Detroit Sports Teams ? he asked.

Oh, is that what the event is ? you chuckled. I had no idea. Actually, my friend Cassie brought me here. I was promised champagne and a great time.

I’ll be honest with you, this fundraiser is mostly an excuse for people to drink and dance, he said as he winked.

You chortled and kept on talking to him. He was easy-going and very sociable. You could tell he was flirting with you and you liked it. It was very flattering to have such a handsome man take an interest in you. You also began to feel more confident in the outfit Cassie had chosen for you. Some people joined the conversation. Apparently, they also played for the football team. All of these men were good-looking and you found yourself considering getting a season ticket for the games. You would have been more interested in sports if you’d known how great the players looked. Eventually, the conversation turned to sports and you took it as your cue to leave, figuring that if Jared wanted to talk some more, he’d find you in the crowd. You sniffed the vial again and found Cassie. People were starting to dance and she dragged you to the dance floor. Had you been completely sober, she wouldn’t have had a chance, but you were far from it now. Whatever potion she had you inhaling was working its wonders when it came to deprive you of your inhibitions. You were more confident in your moves than ever and you danced with her. The both of you were soon swarmed by an army of suitors and you gladly obliged them when they offered to dance. You were having a great time and it was the magic of Cassie : she managed to turn you into a lovable, sociable creature. Hell, you even gave your number to Jared who had found you on the dancefloor and begged for a dance. He promised to call but, unfortunately, he had to leave. You were having yet another drink and talked to Cassie when her face suddenly changed.

Holy shit. How do I look ?! she asked.

You look gorgeous, as always, you giggled. Why ? Is your crush here ?

Better, she grinned. Look, it’s Eminem !!!

You turned your head in a dramatic move and saw Marshall talking to a couple of people. He was wearing black jeans, sneakers, a black tee-shirt and the Saint Laurent jacket you liked so much. Far from the tuxedos some men were wearing, but definitely an improvement compared to some of his daily outfits and usual sweatpants. As always, you thought he looked amazing. You were shocked, though. He was the last person you expected to see here.

He is even hotter in person, she squealed. I have to introduce myself. Come with me, she said as she dragged you across the room.

Your heart was pounding but you didn’t have time to protest. He saw you arrive, hand in hand with Cassie and his eyes seemed to widen, not that you could be so sure because, at this point, you were drunk. But thankfully, you were also too relaxed to care, thanks to the stuff you had kept on inhaling.

Hey, Y/N, he said as he gave you a quick hug, looking suspicious.

Hey handsome, Cassie said seductively. I didn’t realize you knew our beautiful friend here. I’m Cassie.

Hi Cassie, he said as he politely shook the hand she extended. Yeah, I know Y/N.

“Or at least, I think I do.”, he added in a lower voice, still staring at you. You smiled at him but his comment left you puzzled. Of course he knew you. You were friends. Why would he say that ? You looked at him as Cassie talked to him, complimenting his music and telling him how insanely talented she thought he was, though you couldn’t remember her listening to hip-hop. Ever.

Now that I know that you know Y/N, we simply have to hang out. Don’t we, ma chérie ? she said.

Of course, you said shyly - somewhat uncomfortable that your friend was flirting with your Marshall.

Sure, he said with a blank face.

I have to go to the bathroom, she said. Y/N, hold my glass, will you ?

She quickly disappeared and you were left alone with him. You smiled shyly.

I didn’t know you’d be here, you said in an attempt to make small talk.

I didn’t know you would be here, he replied. What are you doing here ?

Same as you, I guess, you giggled.

I’m here for work, he clarified.

Oh well, I’m not, you shrugged with a smile. Cassie took me here. By the way… She thinks you’re hot.

You weren't too sure why you were telling him that. Probably because you did not have much inhibitions anymore. You couldn’t help but chortle at the absurdity of the situation.

Good for her. Now… Care to explain why you’re clearly drunk and dressed like a ho !? He groaned.

You opened your mouth to reply but found yourself unable to say anything. Did he just insult you ?! You were about to retort something when Cassie returned from the bathroom.

Now, Marshall, she said as she took her glass from your hand without even glancing at you, I happen to be free for a dance.

Yeah, he said. I…

He was cut by someone who came to him before he could even continue. You were still a bit stunned. Cassie, however, shrugged off and took you to the dance floor.

You’ll have to get him to call me, she giggled as she resumed dancing.

Y-Yeah, you said, still a bit stunned.

Dance with me, baby, she said as she took your glass and placed it on a table.

She took your hand and you soon forgot about Marshall’s insult. You were rolling your hips to the beat of the music. A man placed a hand on your waist and danced with you. It was very sensual and you found yourself a bit giddy and turned on, not too sure why. Cassie was doing the same with another man. At that moment, your soul had left your body. Or maybe you just experienced being raw and free for the first time in forever ? It felt like you were on fire. Cassie gestured for you to come closer.

You’re having a great time, she laughed. Look at you, all sexy !

I feel great, you giggled. I’m super horny, too.

That’s the poppers, she chuckled. Wanna drive them crazy ?

Poppers ? Is that what she gave you ? Before you knew it, she was kissing you. You were a bit taken aback but returned the kiss anyway. You liked women as much as men, for sure, but you had never thought of your friend like that. Yet, you found yourself kissing back, because you just felt like it. You were turned on, having a great time, and she was gorgeous, so why not make out with her ? You were laughing as you broke the kiss. Before you knew it, the guy you were dancing with was kissing you. You giggled as you danced with him some more. You had never felt more beautiful and desirable. Your thoughts were interrupted when someone in the crowd grabbed your wrist. Marshall. He didn’t look too happy.

Come with me, he said firmly.

Not a chance, you giggled. I’m dancing here.

No shit, he groaned. Just come, Y/N.

So that you can insult me again ? I hardly think so, Em, you said as you rolled your eyes.

That’s not a fucking question, he groaned on your ear as he pulled you closer to him.

Before you could protest, he was holding your hand, walking you out. Cassie followed you.

Where are the two of you going ? She asked.

I’m taking her home, Marshall said curtly.

Oh… then why don’t you take us both home ? She offered with her seductive signature smile.

You were stunned and you looked at the two of them. Was she offering… a threesome ?! Your eyes were wide open wide and you felt like a deer in headlights.

She needs to sleep, Marshall said.

I’m fine, you groaned as he shot you a death glare.

Whatever, Cassie said. We can figure out who does what when we get to your place, she added with a wink.

Oh, I have it all figured out, he assured her. I’m taking Y/N home. You can catch a ride to… wherever it is that you’re going.

You were about to say something but the room was starting to spin and you almost lost your balance. The heels were definitely too high.

Careful there, Marshall said as he placed a hand on your waist to secure you. Come on, I’ll take you home.

Whatever, Cassie sighed. Call me tomorrow, chérie ?

You nodded and walked out as Marshall was holding you firmly by the hand. The cold, fresh air made you shiver and he sighed before placing his jacket over your shoulders.

I think someone’s following us, you slurred.

Yeah, that’s my security, he groaned. Look down, now.

What ? You asked, a bit lost.

Fuck. Just look down, he repeated in an annoyed tone.

You did, as you thought that maybe he was going to show you something, but you saw a flash from afar. Someone was snapping pictures as you got out of the event. Your head was still ducked as Marshall led you to a van that was waiting. He helped you get in before entering the car as well, followed by the two security guards. You felt insanely small, as they were huge and took a lot of space in the car. He told the driver to go to his place.

You’re not taking me home ? You asked.

I’m taking you where I can keep an eye on you, he grunted.

That’s totally unnecessary, you said blurringly as you rolled your eyes.

That wasn’t a question.

You sighed and looked outside the window. You threw a glance at Marshall, who was fuming, his fist clenched into a ball. Your head was still turning and you didn’t feel too good.

I need to get out of here, you mumbled. Can you stop the car ?!

Will you just shut up for one fucking second ?! He snapped.

I’m gonna puke.

Shit. Stop the car now, Marshall said to the driver.

Immediately, the vehicle piled and you hit your head on the window. One of the bodyguards opened the door and you ran outside before puking on the side of the road. Marshall followed you and stood next to you. You were doubled up as he held your hair. When you finally stopped puking, you looked at him with teary eyes.

I’m sorry, you mumbled.

He rolled his eyes and shook his head before leading you back to the car.

Do you hate me ? You whispered.

No, he groaned. We’ll talk about it when we get home, alright ?

God, my head hurts, you croaked.

He sighed and gently pulled you so that your head rested on his shoulder.

There.

Thank you, you whispered.

The rest of the drive was silent and you were almost asleep by the time the car dropped you at Marshall’s place.

Can you walk ? He asked.

You nodded and took a few steps but almost collapsed. These damn heels had you feeling like a baby giraffe taking its first steps.

Come here, he sighed before carrying you bridal-style.

As you walked through the door, he carried you upstairs to a bathroom.

You need to shower, ok ? There’s a bit of barf on your dress…

Ok, you muttered. Marshall, I-I’m sorry.

You were on the verge of tears and your bottom lip was quivering. His look softened a bit.

You can barely stand so I’ll help you with the shower and the undressing, is that alright with you ?

You nodded. He made you sit on the floor before helping you undress. You grunted as he freed your feet from the shoes. He fumbled with the zipper of your dress, which was apparently stuck.

Fuckin’ zipper, he muttered. I should cut this thing.

Don’t, you whined. It’s new.

He groaned as he finally managed to unzip you. You were finally naked on the cold floor of the bathroom. The dress didn’t allow you to wear any underwear. You noticed his surprise, but he didn’t comment. In any other circumstance, you would have felt embarrassed, but you were too drunk to care. You were actually thankful he was able to help you get out of these clothes, as you wouldn’t be able to undress on your own.

Alright, now let’s get you to the shower, he said softly.

You nodded and tried to stand. Although it was easier without the heels, you weren’t too secure. He helped you stand and led you to the shower.

I’m going to take my clothes off. It’ll be easier. Are you ok with that ?

You nodded silently, not really daring to look at him. As minutes went by, you were feeling more and more ashamed of yourself.

Hold still. Don’t fall, he directed before taking his clothes off, staying in his boxers.

He went back to you and held you firmly so that you wouldn’t fall before turning on the shower. The water was flowing on your bodies. You tried your best not to fall but Marshall had to hold you with one hand while helping you wash with the other.

Fuck it, he grunted as he turned off the water. I’ll just draw a bath, ok ?

He drew a bath and helped you settle in the huge bathtub.

Are you alright ? He asked gently, concern all over his face.

You hummed and he started to wash your back.

You’re not getting in ? You asked.

Don’t worry about me, he said. Try not to drown, alright ?

I’m just saying, you might as well get in. You’re all wet already.

He shrugged and finally joined you in the bathtub, settling right behind you so that you rested between his legs, while holding you tight so you wouldn't slip.

You know you could have taken your boxers off, right ?

We’re not doing that, he sighed.

Just saying… I know what your dick looks like, anyway.

He scoffed softly and resumed helping you wash. It was actually easier now that you were in the bathtub.

Marshall ?

Mmmh ?

Do you hate me ? You asked under your breath.

Yes. I loathe you. That’s why I’m taking care of you right now, isn’t that obvious ? He asked sarcastically. Of course I don’t hate you, Y/N. Why do you even ask that ?

You said I was a whore.

I didn’t say that. I said you were dressed like a ho, he corrected.

You turned your head to look at him.

What ? You’re going to deny it ? He asked with an eyeroll. You weren’t even wearing a fucking thong.

That’s mean, you said. You can’t wear underwear with that kind of dress. Otherwise, it shows.

Oh so that’s what makes it not a ho-dress ? He mused as he lathered your arm with soap. My bad, sorry. You definitely looked like a nun, then.

You rolled your eyes.

Why were you even wearing this thing ? He asked.

Cassie said it looked good, you shrugged. I mean, obviously, you disagree, but…

Never said so, he said.

You said I looked like a ho !

Once again… no one said hoes can’t look good, he chuckled. I mean… you sort of have to, if you’re a ho, I guess ? Otherwise you’re not a very good one.

You let out a drunken giggle.

So you think I looked good ? You asked.

Yeah, the prettiest ho I’ve ever seen, he grinned. It’s just… it doesn’t look like you, you know ?

Maybe it should look like me, you shrugged.

What the hell do you mean ?

I look better like this, you said.

Nope, he replied as he shook his head. You don’t.

You don’t think so ?

I think you’re beautiful as is, and that you don’t need to look like a whore, a ho or whatever. Or to act like one, for that matter, he said.

Hey !

He shrugged as he stared at you.

Was I acting like a ho ? You asked sheepishly, suddenly unsure about the whole evening.

I don’t know. I guess, sort of, he said. Seriously, though…What was with all the kissing and grinding like you were in heat ?

I don’t know, you admitted. Cassie gave me that vial to sniff. It made me all light and happy and…horny.

Seriously ? Poppers ?! He sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

You swallowed dryly.

She told me it wasn’t a big deal, you said.

Let me guess, this genius is also the one who convinced you to have a drink ?

… yes, you admitted.

He groaned and shook his head. You looked down in embarrassment.

I just wanted to have a good time, you said sheepishly.

Yeah, because breaking your sobriety and making out with people is the only way to do that, right…?

The comment about how you had failed to stay sober caused you to break into tears.

I’m sorry, you murmured as you sobbed. I… I thought it wouldn’t count ?

What ? He asked, confused.

I mean, I figured that, it’s not pills, you explained as you kept sobbing.

That’s not how sobriety works, Y/N, he said as he shook his head. You know better than that.

Tears kept on flowing. It felt like you would never stop crying.

I fucked up. Everything. I’m a failure. I’m so sorry, you cried.

Come here, he said as he pulled you in his arms.

He held you and you rested your head in the crook of his neck, as you kept on crying. After a few minutes, you managed to calm down.

Better now ? He asked.

Yes. I’m sorry, you muttered.

It’s ok to cry, he said as he stroked your hair. Now let’s get you dressed, ok ? I don’t want you to be cold.

He got out of the bathtub first and helped you up. You were a bit more level-headed and managed to stand up. He wrapped you in a towel and told you not to move before disappearing for a minute, coming back wearing sweatpants.

Put these on, he said as he gave you some clothes of his to wear. Let’s get ready for bed, ok ?

You’re not taking me home ? You asked as you yawned.

It’s late and Talia and Jamal are either asleep or having sex, he shrugged. So I don’t think we should disturb. Plus, you’re still shit-faced so I should keep an eye on you.

You nodded and got dressed. His clothes were comfy. You also enjoyed the smell of his detergent - it was a smell you associated with him. You looked at yourself in the mirror.

I look like a house elf in your tee-shirt, you pointed out.

Come on Dobby, he chuckled as he shook his head. To bed, now.

I can’t sleep in my makeup, you said. Do you have anything I could use to remove it ?

He opened the cabinet door and managed to find some makeup removing wipes. You were wearing so much makeup that it took a while for you to take it off.

You don’t need to use that much makeup, he pointed out. You look better without it anyway.

I hate wearing it, you confessed.

So… why the fuck do you look like a stolen car that’s been painted over ?

I don’t know. I wanted to look pretty. Cassie convinced me. I mean, I know I’ll never look as good as her, but…

That’s true, he said.

He looked at you and inspected your face, his fingers tracing your cheeks.

You look better than her, he added.

You felt yourself blush. You could tell he was being honest. It was the first time anyone ever mentioned that you looked better than Cassie.

You don’t think she’s pretty ? You asked.

Nah, she looks good, for sure, he said. But she looks too… whatever. Doesn’t matter anyway.

It kind of does, though, you replied.

Why is that ?

She likes you.

He scoffed and rolled his eyes.

No she doesn’t, he said matter-of-factly.

She thinks you’re hot and she wants you to call her, you replied.

She likes Eminem, he explained. She has no idea who I am. I know she’s your friend and shit, but she basically threw herself at me, just because I’m famous. If I’d been a random guy, I’m not even sure she would have given me the time of day.

You’d still be hot, you pointed out.

He shook his head with a smile.

Doesn’t matter, he said softly. I’m used to it, you know ? I can tell this type of thing from a mile away. Not to mention she was ready to drag her drunk friend into a threesome…

It’s probably a misunderstanding, you said to defend her. I mean, she’s my friend, she wouldn’t…

I know it sucks to hear it, Y/N, but you became an afterthought for this girl as soon as she saw a possibility to suck my dick. That’s not what friends do.

He sighed and rubbed your shoulder.

Also, friends don’t give their sober friends poppers and champagne, he pointed out.

To be fair she didn’t know I was sober, you said. I didn’t have the heart to explain that to her… I guess it’s my fault.

He hummed and shrugged.

We’ll talk about that tomorrow. I’m tired, you’re exhausted, and it’s time for bed, he said.

You almost giggled when you heard the unintentional rhyme. He led you to the adjacent guest bedroom. You felt a bit sobered-up but he was right, you were exhausted. You settled under the covers as he sat next to you.

Thank you Marshall, you said as you stared into his blue eyes.

Oh so you’re calling me Marshall now ? He said with a grin.

Well, that’s your name, you said confused.

You called me Em, at the party, he said.

Well people also call you that, you pointed out.

You don’t.

You shrugged.

Yeah, so ?

I don’t like it, he said. Not in your mouth. It doesn’t feel right. I don’t mind about the others, but… For you, it’s Marshall.

Ok, you chuckled. I won’t call you Em if you don’t call me a hoe or piss me off, then.

Deal, he said with a smile.

Marshall ? You asked.

Yes ?

Can I have a hug ?

He simply nodded and took you in his arms.

What am I supposed to do now ? You asked. About this whole sober thing ?

For now, just sleep, Y/N. We’ll talk about it tomorrow. When you’re completely sobered-up and well-rested, ok ?

You nodded, thanked him and closed your eyes. You felt his fingers in your hair, gently stroking your scalp. It was all you needed to fall asleep.

#eminem #marshall mathers #slim shady #eminem fanfiction #eminem x reader #eminem fluff #eminem imagine #marshall mathers x reader #marshall mathers imagine #marshall mathers headcanons #recovery fanfiction

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alex-rp · 2 months ago

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Maya Le Tissier x Reader (PT4)

You have to navigate your first time with the girl you desperately want to become yours.

(A/N: Sorry that it’s so long. I was going to cut bits out but it makes most sense as it is! Part 5 will be in the works asap, also very smut related! Any requests for this series are welcomed, as well as any ideas you have for another fic with a different player! Just lmk! Thank you guys and gals ✨)

Warnings: very much 18+. Smut 👀

You walk to Maya’s room, following behind her like a lost puppy. Was this real? You kept thinking you’d wake up any minute and you’ll be alone in your own room. This can’t be real. As Maya reaches the door to her room, you give her a small smile. “Wait for me in there, I’m just going to freshen up. I really won’t be long” you promise her. You just needed to get yourself into the reality of this. You close the door to the bathroom at the end of the hall, before splashing cold water onto your face. “Don’t fuck this up” you repeat quietly to yourself in the mirror. You definitely didn’t need your nerves getting in the way.

You’d washed your face, sprayed some faintly floral perfume you’d found on the shelf and you were ready. This was a very big deal to you. You’d been interested in Maya since the day you met her and you definitely didn’t think you’d get to do this. As you make the short walk back to Maya’s room, you feel the doubt creeping back in. That is, until you see the woman you’ve been wanting waiting for you, covered with only a thin blanket that usually sat at the bottom of her bed.

She’d dimmed her lights, setting the mood. You crawl into her bed, though it’s more like you’re hovering over her. She grabs the back of your neck to pull you closer to her, almost immediately, and kisses you. You kiss her too, matching her eagerness. Letting her make the first move this time seemed to calm you down a little as you become increasingly aware of the mutual attraction. With that, you find yourself tracing her skin with your fingertips. You had to keep yourself propped up with your left hand but your other was free to wander Maya’s body. And wander it did.

While you were freshening up, she’d stripped down to her underwear. This left you very hot and overdressed in your clothes. You stop your hands, only breaking the kiss to pull your shirt off. It only seemed fair. You see the smirk on her face as she analyses every inch of your almost fully exposed torso before her lips reconnect with yours, firmly. You didn’t have a chance to even think as you feel soft, warm hands trailing your skin, making little goosebumps appear. It even elicits a content sigh from you. You follow suit as your free hand takes in her defined body, your lips still locked with Maya’s.

She rolls you over so you’re on your back and tugs at your waistband. “Let me see…” she smirks at you. She was your captain after all, you wouldn’t disobey captain’s orders. You lift your hips up and… of course it’s about as unsexy as you could have made it, causing you both to laugh a little. You really had Maya half naked on top of you, also half naked.

There’s barely time to process it before Maya starts to kiss down your body, starting with your lips. Her mouth is soft and gentle, caring even. She moves to your jaw, pressing little kisses onto your skin. You tilt your head slightly to give her better access to your neck so she can kiss all she wants. You let out soft hums of satisfaction as you let your hands trail up and down her bare back. You can’t hide the smirk as you accidentally, on purpose, unhook Maya’s bra with ease. She effortlessly slides it off her body without breaking rhythm. It’s quite impressive. Her lips suck on the bottom of your neck, as if to make sure it can be hidden by your shirt tomorrow. Your nails drag down her back lightly, settling on her firm ass. Maya pulls back and raises an eyebrow at you, before sliding her hands under your bra to give your breasts a good squeeze.

It definitely all felt real now, but you were still a little in shock that Maya wanted you like this. All the thoughts in your head were washed away as her lips collide with yours again, passionately this time. You feel two fingers press your centre through your underwear, causing a quiet moan to escape your lips. You pull back, wanting to meet her eyes. “You’re sure?” You feel like you have to double check. She just nods. “More than ever Y/N” Maya smirks at you. Her fingers start to circle and your legs seem to subconsciously spread wider, as if she controlled them. “Relax… I promised I’d look after you” she whispers. It’s as if she sensed your tension. You don’t need to try to relax as her touch does that for you. She smiles at you so sweetly before she kisses your stomach, her fingers still circling through the fabric of your underwear. You run your fingers through her hair, using your free hand to unhook your own bra. It doesn’t go unnoticed by your captain. “That’s better…” she smirks, immediately cupping your bare breast with her hand.

Her kisses start to descend down your front, slowly, painfully slowly. You squirm a little to hint at what you want… what you need. You hear Maya laugh a little but she seemingly decides to give you what you want. She hooks her fingers into your waistband and pulls your underwear off you swiftly. Her eyes light up as sees takes in the view. It’s as if seeing you exposed in front of her like that triggered something inside of her. She kisses the inside of your thighs tenderly. You watch her every move, fingers still in her hair. Her eyes meet yours and she makes a point of keeping it that way as her kisses move to your clit. The feeling makes you shudder almost immediately. You carefully lift your hips up to meet her mouth, trying to keep your little moans subtle and quiet.

She brings her hand from your breast and teases your entrance with her fingertips. “So wet for me…” Maya mumbles against your skin. You try to hide your face to mask your embarrassment but she shakes her head. “Look at me” she tells you with such confidence that you feel like you have to. She slides two fingers gently inside of you, hearing that squelch as she goes to pull them back out again. Her tongue works your clit, while her fingers work your entrance. You give your breasts some attention while your grip in her hair tightens to push her into you more. Your noises weren’t so subtle anymore but you had to make sure you weren’t loud. “Maya… please…” you beg, needing her. She took notice, increasing the speed of her fingers to find the perfect rhythm that makes you feel the way that you craved. She was hitting everything perfectly, curling her fingers inside of you every so often. You could hear the pop when she sucks your sensitive clit into her mouth and her heavy breath when she releases it to swirl her tongue around it.

You were right there. The room was filled with noises from you both but more so yours. “I… I…” you start but you can’t finish. “Use your words Y/N…” Maya breathes out against your skin. “I…” is all you can manage again as your thighs shake around Maya. Her fingers were fast and deep, and her mouth was magical. You pull her hair so hard that your knuckles are white. One final curl of her fingers and you feel that invisible thread inside you snap with a long, much louder moan. “Maya…” you mumble as you ride out your climax against her stilled fingers, trying to regain control of your body. She cleans you up with her tongue before crawling back up the bed and planting a soft kiss on your lips. You taste yourself on her mouth, making you groan a little. You feel Maya’s thumb stroke your cheek gently. You pull away just enough to smile at her, your hand finding hers and intertwining your fingers. “How about I return the favour?” You ask her as confidently as you can before she kisses you again, leaving you feeling like you can’t ever get enough of this. You didn’t know what this makes you and Maya but for now, you’d solely focus on making her feel as good as she made you feel.

#woso community #woso imagine #woso x reader #wsl #maya le tissier #muwfc #fanfic #manchester united #woso smut

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millenialfanfictionaddiction · 1 year ago

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It’s Been a While….

Tobio Kageyama x Female! reader (she/her pronouns)

Warnings: slight angst, swearing, mostly fluff

WC: 3.5k

AN: blah idk what to think about this. It stems from an idea I had a dream about but this is one of those times I’m doubting myself. I low key want to write a part two but I also just wanna bury it 😅

Summary: Years after letting go of the love of your life and starting anew, a change provided by a friend allows you a glimpse into your old life and a chance to reconnect with the person you lost.

♥️ ♥️ ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

“So, I guess this is it huh?” You murmured, trying your best to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill as you stood in front of your now ex-boyfriend, Tobio Kageyama.

“YN listen, I-”

You put your hand out, stopping the words that were about to surface. You couldn’t stand to hear them; you couldn’t bare listening to those words again when you knew what was about to happen. If this was going to end, it was going to end on your terms.

“Tobio don’t. Please, let’s just say our goodbyes.” He sadly nodded, his head going down as you stood there, the awkward silence filling the air.

“So, you leave tomorrow morning for Italy, right? Are you all packed?” You asked as Tobio rubbed the back of his head. It was a nervous habit he had developed, something he did when he wasn’t sure how to react.

“Uhh yeah pretty much,” he responded, the silence still penetrating the air. You had tried your best to distract from the obvious but the obvious was beginning to suffocate you.

“Ok well I guess this is goodbye then,” you stuttered, trying to contain the tears. The years of memories flooded back, from the first day you met to your first date and everything beyond. You loved Tobio but you knew love wasn’t enough to keep him here with you. When he was first recruited to play in Italy, your first thoughts weren’t how proud you were of him or how this would only further his career. The only thought that filled your mind was how you’d ever bare letting him go.

“Yeah I guess so,” he whispered still standing in front of you, not wanting to hug you just yet. Hugging you would symbolize what he didn’t want to happen, it would symbolize the end of one of the best things that he’d ever had in his entire life. When he was first accepted to play in Italy, all he could think about was how amazing this opportunity was for him, how awesome it would be for his pro career in volleyball. When he shared the news with you, he hadn’t thought through the logistics of a long-distance relationship. The last thing on his mind at that time was how you’d be able to make it work. He’d never imagined it wouldn’t work.

You lunged forward, throwing your hands around his neck as you held him tightly for one last time, the tears you’d been holding in slowly seeping past your lids as his arms encompassed you, pulling you tight against him. You felt so amazing, so perfect against him and he hated it. He hated how this would be the last time he’d ever feel this serene.

You pulled back first, tears flowing down your cheeks as you looked up to him with a small smile, “I’ll be watching you, ok? So, no slacking off.”

He smiled a little and nodded, watching the tears stream down your cheeks, wanting to do nothing more than kiss them away. You slowly backed away, creating distance from him, your legs feeling so incredibly heavy as if trying their best to keep you planted.

He watched as you finally turned around, your arms going around your midsection as you hugged yourself and walking away and right out of his life.

*A Few Years Later*

Your phone rang as you checked the called id, sighing and swiping your finger across to answer the call.

“What do you want now Kuroo?” You ordered as a surprise gasp sounded from the speaker as he finally spoke.

“YN how could you hurt me like this! I thought I was your favorite person?”

You smiled and shook your head, “not by a long shot Kuroo but you are in the top 20. Is that good enough?”

Kuroo chuckled, replying, “I’ll take it! But listen, I called for a specific reason this time. I’m putting together a sort of reunion and I need my favorite photographer ever to help me!”

“Then why did you call me?” You chuckled as Kuroo laughed in response.

“YN, you know how much I love your work and you really are the best in the business!”

You sighed again, knowing Kuroo was trying his best to be flattering, “ok so what’s this reunion? Like a class reunion or what?” The silence filled the call after you spoke as confusion filled your eyes. You pulled your phone away to check if Kuroo was still connected.

“Kuroo-”

“It’s for a volleyball event YN,” he finally responded as your body stiffened. You hadn’t photographed a volleyball event since Tobio had left a few years ago, shifting your passion in a different direction.

“Kuroo I can’t-”

“YN please just hear me out, ok? I know you don’t photograph sports anymore but please, I’m desperate here. There isn’t anyone who can capture the game like you can. I’ve pulled a lot of our high school alumni into this game, and I think it would be awesome if you’d consider it. Kenma’s sponsoring and promoting the event and Asahi is helping with the uniform design. Yachi is also helping with marketing and design. Imagine if we had YN LN, the famous photographer and Karasuno Alum to photograph the event!”

When you first met Kuroo years ago, you were a first-year manager along with Yachi. You’d always thought he was a great leader and organizer as well as a person who could flatter almost anyone if he tried. He channeled his personality perfectly into his career in sports promotion, able to secure deals and push the volleyball league further than it has been in decades.

You looked over to your bookshelf, your eyes landing on the only memory you’d kept from your relationship with Tobio, a photo from his last game with the Schweiden Adlers. You walked over to it, picking it up and rubbing your finger gently down the side of the frame. In the photo you were looking at the camera, smile wide as you hand rested on Tobio’s chest. His eyes weren’t on the camera but rather on you, his large smile and eyes completely focused on you as if nothing happening around him mattered at all.

“YN you still there?”

“I’ll do it,” you bluntly spoke, an auditable and loud “yes” coming from the speaker as Kuroo continued to talk.

“You won’t regret this, Yn!! I’ll text you the details and we can meet in my office soon to discuss what you’ll be doing! I really appreciate this Yn and I owe you big time!”

You didn’t really hear much Kuroo spoke about, your eyes still focused on the photo as you began to wonder if this really was the right choice.

*A few weeks later*

“We just need headshots of all the players who are participating who are currently in Japan, the rest are going to submit their headshots to me,” Kuroo directed as you prepared your camera, making adjustments to lighting and the background as you half listened.

Exasperated, you mindlessly nodded for the 50th time as Kuroo continued to ramble, his nerves on edge since he’d returned from his trip overseas to secure several more players from the “monster generation” to play on the reunion game.

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite girl!” A voice boomed as you turned around to see Atsumu, Bokuto, Sakusa and Inunaki walking into the studio. You smiled, placing your camera down as you went to greet the guys.

“Well, if it isn’t one of my favorite setters,” you joked as Atsumu pulled back from the hug, mouth agape as you chuckled at his reaction.

“Come on Yn, be realistic, he isn’t even in the top 10 on your favorite setters list,” Sakusa grumbled, walking to the corner as Atsumu glared at him.

“Hey hey hey there’s my Yn!” Bokuto shouted, hauling you into a huge hug as you squealed, your feet leaving the floor as he swung you around.

“Bokuto don’t break her!” Hoshiumi snapped from behind him, Hirugami, Romero and Heiwajima trailing after.

“Hey guys!” You cheered, letting go of Bokuto and running to hug them.

“It’s so good to see you again Yn! We were surprised to hear you were involved with this,” Romero remarked as you nodded.

“Surprised but happy!” Hoshiumi added as he hugged you.

“Well, Kuroo begged me to help so I really couldn’t say no,” you smirked as Kuroo narrowed his eyes.

“Geez Yn stop making me seem so desperate!”

“YN doesn’t need to make you seem desperate when you definitely are desperate,” Kenma stated, strolling in behind the teams as you snickered.

“Kenma you really weren’t needed you know!” Kuroo growled as Kenma shrugged his shoulders and headed to take a seat in the corner.

“I heard Oikawa and Hinata were coming too,” Heiwajima remarked as Kuroo confirmed.

“They are going to be flying in next week along with Ushijima and Kageyama.”

All eyes shifted to you at the mention of Kageyama’s name. You really couldn’t blame the guys; they knew you and Kageyama had ended on good terms but also that your relationship had been a sore subject and ultimately the reason you left sports photography.

You had to admit, when Kuroo first mentioned Tobio, a fact he’d somehow forgotten to mention prior to your meeting, you’d thought about dropping out, the idea of seeing your ex-boyfriend and the only man you’d ever loved extremely painful. However, you couldn’t ignore the small part of you that was also excited to see him in person. Sure, you’d watched every game you could, every interview possible. You’d watched the Olympics and even bought a jersey to add to your collection, something you’d never ever let anyone see.

“It’s fine guys,” you explained, “really I’m happy to be a part of this.”

Everyone nodded, not wanting to push the topic. While the guys had always been chaotic and kind of childish, they did care for your well-being, and they loved you.

“Now we let’s get these photos done!”

“Alright, the greatest first!” Atsumu beamed and Inunaki laughed.

“You should be last Sumu, you’ll probably break YN’s camera!” Everyone laughed at Sumu’s expense as you felt the joy of being reunited with the people you once spent so much time with.

*2 weeks later*

You arrived at the stadium, camera and press badge in hand as you adjusted your dress. You’d done your hair and makeup, wanting to look nice and professional for the event. This would be the first game you’d photographed in years, and you wanted to make a good impression. The crowds roared as you entered the gym, the bright lights hitting you as you looked around to see reporters, tv crews and officials fill the gym floor.

Kuroo waved at you as you walked over to him, noticing how truly huge the event was.

“You look great Yn! Absolutely gorgeous!” Kuroo yelled, the noise on the stadium floor loud as you blushed as his compliment.

“This is amazing Tetsuro! You really pulled this off!” Kuroo beamed with pride as you looked around, the photos you’d taken of the the players printed on banners that filled the stadium. You’re eyes trailed until they landed on Tobio’s banner, his face exactly as you remembered it. You smiled a little, looking around at the crowds.

Daichi, Suga, Asahi, Yamaguchi, Tsukki and Yachi all waved as you smiled and vigorously waved back, excited to see your old teammates.

You saw Kenma in his box, probably waiting for Kuroo as he gave you a chin lift and returned back to his phone. You noticed others from high school in the stands as you stood in the grandness of the court. You’d truly missed this feeling.

The whistle blew as Kuroo squeezed your arm and excused himself. You took your place on the side of the court as the teams were finally presented.

Team A parades out first, their flashy style of green and black jersey’s adding just the right pop of color. Oikawa and Hinata smiled and waved at you as you snapped their pictures, capturing the best angles you could.

Team B followed shortly after, their gold uniforms giving the perfect amount of class and sophistication. You wanted as Ushiwaka, Bokuto and Hoshiumi strolled across the floor, Bokuto frantically waving to the crowd as you giggled at his boisterous spirit.

Your eyes shift to Joffe who followed and to Inunaki right after. You were checking your camera before looking up, your eyes dead locked on Tobio’s as he stopped mid stride, his eyes widening as of in shock.

Tobio knew he would see you here, after all, it was a big part of the reason he agreed to join in this reunion game. He had thought about you almost constantly since leaving years ago, hoping he’d once again get the chance to see your beautiful face. He’d been preparing for weeks, going over how he’d casually walk by you, nod his head and try to act cool. He’d even prepared a few things to say to you if the opportunity present itself.

However, all his past thoughts and plans went straight out the window upon seeing you. You stood there, more breathtaking than he’s ever imagined. Your hair and makeup were flawless and your outfit fit your body like a glove. His mind drifted back to all of the times he’d made you laugh, all the times you’d spent together since meeting in high school. His heart hammered thought his chest, his jersey feeling as thought it was rippling from the aftershock.

You stood there, a small smile on your gorgeous face as you lifted your camera to snap his picture. Your eyes watered upon seeing him, something you’d known would probably happen.

“Kageyama moves dude!” Yaku whisper shouted as Kageyama snapped back to reality, his brain processing that he was holding up the line of his teammates.

“Oh sorry-” he apologized as he glanced forward and made his way to the starting line. His mind emptied of every thought he’d had, filing instead with your imagine as it implanted itself in his brain. At the greeting line, he turned to see you now staring back at him, the same sweet smile he loved plastered on your flawless face.

You couldn’t help but smile at him. Tobio was almost exactly as you’d remembered him. Sure, he was a little bit bigger; he’d obviously gained some muscle and matured since living in Italy but deep down, he was still the same boy you’d remembered from high school. Your heart fluttered just watching him, the memories of all your time spent together flooding your brain.

“We’d like to welcome you all to tonight’s special match. Team A vs Team B, a mash up of Japan’s best!” The announcer rang as the crowds cheered. You quickly made work of snapping as many pictures as you could, moving from side to side to capture the men’s forms prior to the game.

You’d been known as a legend in the sports world, your talent for photography starting in high school and only furthering afterwards. Your photos made the cover of many Japanese magazines, thanks to help from Akaashi as well as covers world wide. Noya would often send you texts, showing you how he’d send your photos all across the globe on his travels. Even Hinata had snapped a selfie or two with your magazine covers.

Tobio watched as you worked, following your every move as he prepared to warm up. He loved how passionate you were about photography. Since moving to Italy, he’d continued to follow your career collecting magazines that features your photographs and following your instagram page. He never interacted with you but that didn’t mean he didn’t order prints and support whatever projects you partook in, donating money to fundraisers you sponsored.

As the warmups began, you took your place at the side of the court. You watched as Hinata, Goshiki, and Romero all spiked. Balls slammed on the floor as the memories of your days photographing volleyball continued to flood your mind. You chuckled as you remembered how many times you’d nearly been hit or how many times Tobio would pull you off the court because he didn’t trust someone not to harm you.

He’s been protective of you even in High school, Hinata often teasing him about how he treated you like you were made of glass. In hindsight, Hinata probably knew better than anyone that his best friend was in love with you way back in high school.

You turned back to see Kageyama holding a volleyball, his focus still on you as you exited the court for the teams to switch. He shifted his attention back to the spikers as he took his place near the net. You were caught in the moment, his beautiful and perfect set gliding through the air as Bokuto slammed it into the opposing court, the crowd cheering him on. Tobio hadn’t changed, not one bit.

The game started as you began maneuvering the court, trying to capture as many shots as possible. The energy was palpable as you moved all around. Set after set, you found yourself drawn into every single play, every single serve and spike. This is why you loved volleyball.

At the end of the game, you tried to compose yourself, coming down from the high of an incredible match. You’d managed to run through nearly three memory cards, taking well over a thousand pictures of just the game itself. The guys took pictures with fans after the match as interviewers and Tv personnel flocked to their sides.

However, your job was complete, the requirements set forth by Kuroo full-filled. You walked over to your camera bag and began to disassemble and put away your equipment. Unbeknownst to you, someone had followed you.

Tobio stood a mere two feet behind you, his eyes tracking your bent over form as he tried to gather up the courage to speak to you. He’d never had a problem speaking his mind, never an issue telling people what he thought but for some reason, his mouth was incredibly dry despite drinking an excessive amount of water.

He watched as you fiddled with your camera bag, the same bag he’d gifted you for graduation years ago. It was your favorite color and just the right size. His chest filled with pride knowing you were still using it, that you’d still been keeping him close.

While he was staring, you’d turned around, startling and grabbing your chest in surprise at the giant, 6’2” setter standing behind you.

“Good god Tobio you scared me!” You laughed, your hand over your chest as you tried to regain composure.

“I-damn, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to- I was just wanting to… hi YN,” he finally stuttered out as you smiled up at him, his beautiful blue eyes lighting up with joy.

“Hi Tobio. Long time no see!”

“Yeah it’s been a while,” he mumbled, rubbing the back of his head, “I’m glad you could make it.”

“Me too! You did amazing out there. I’d forgotten how different seeing you playing in person was!” You added as he lowered his hand down.

“Seeing me in play in person?”

“Yeah silly, I told you’d I’d be watching you. I meant it. I’ve watched every game,” you answered. He knew you wouldn’t lie to him but just hearing you say it, after wondering for years if you were watching, it made him feel incredible.

“Hey Yn, I’m in town for another week, would you maybe consider having dinner with me?” He inquired, desperately hoping you’d agree to meet with him.

You eyes widened at his question. You hadn’t been expecting this, hadn’t been expecting him to ask you to dinner. You’d thought he might say something to you but never this. Before you could answer, he continued.

“If not it’s ok, it’s just that, well I’ve been thinking about you since I left, and I’d really like to catch up. But if you don’t want to-”

“I’d love to Tobio,” you replied as he jerked back a little.

“Wait really?” You giggled at his reaction as you nodded in confirmation.

“I’ve been thinking about you to, and I’d love to go out with you.” He smiled down at you as your beautiful doe eyes met his.

“Hey Kageyama! Come on man we are going out to celebrate!” Hinata shouted as he waved to you. You waved back as Kageyama looked conflicted between you and Hinata.

“Go and have fun, ok? Text me tomorrow and we will make a plan to meet,” you assured him, squeezing his bicep as he smiled back and nodded. He turned, running towards the locker rooms before stopping and turning back. He ran back up to you as you watched in confusion before being swept up into a tight hug, your body instantly relaxing as you hugged him back. Yep, you definitely missed this.

391 notes · View notes

writingsfromhome · 7 months ago

Text

Dos and Dont’s Epilogue

Part 1 / 2/3/4

A/N: for those of you still needing more closure with this story this is for you

——————————————

6 months later:

My apartment was small but it was mine and I got to share it with one of my childhood best friends I’d reconnected with after moving back to the states last year.

Today the sun was setting on the beautiful November day. I had ordered in sushi and was enjoying a glass of wine, waiting for Deanna to get back home and tell me about her date.

These quiet evenings to myself always got me contemplative. Tonight was no different—I get to thinking about my day on set and how tomorrow was going to look.

After coming back from London and submitting my video proposal last spring, I had been rejected to nobody’s surprise. But that hadn’t stopped Harry from intervening and getting me a spot on set. It became a joke that I was a ghost intern there because really all I got to do was shadow people on set and help out where I could. And it had left me hungry for more.

I started building a portfolio and networking like crazy to get on more sets. So far I’d worked on three, once as a general assistant and twice as an arts assistant. I felt myself moving in the right direction I wanted to and it was thrilling.

I had Harry to thank for that really. And just like always, thinking about him sent a pang of achey regret through me.

I’m not sure what happened between us; we kept in touch loosely after I got back to the States. Mostly we talked about my future work and getting on set but after he actually got me on set and I got busy, our conversations fizzled out.

When I landed my second gig and had to maneuver my old job with Oretta she had ultimately let me go. I’d been bitter about failing something then but now I saw it as the kindness that it was—she had let me go and I had the room to pursue this new career.

It wasn’t easy though. The feeling of failure had driven me into the arms of a depressive episode that had taken me back home to Burbank. And when headlines were made of Harry’s new dates and women of the week, I’d taken it as a sign. We shouldn’t be in each other’s lives.

But I missed him every time I thought about him. And I always hated myself a little for not being brave enough to do anything about it, for pushing him away, and for liking him in the first place.

Clearly I was a very health person.

There was a knock on the door and I knew it had to be Deanna.

She distracts me with stories about her date and how well they hit it off. Apparently he kissed her goodnight right downstairs while I’d been drowning in misery on our living room couch.

The next morning, my phone rings at the ass crack of dawn. I expect it’s someone on set and end up being right. So with a few hours of sleep and a slight hangover from last night’s wine, I pick up a large coffee and get to work.

Last night’s thoughts bleed into my drive to work. It was when I was on set especially that I wanted to message Harry. I wanted to update him about all the cool things I was working on and hear what he thought. It was stupid but I wanted him to be proud of me too.

I wonder sometimes if I should have said something in London, been the bold one and taken a leap.

But I couldn’t have.

Harry was a damn rockstar and I was still figuring out my life. I can’t imagine it could have worked. So was it just the maybe, the what-if of us that kept looping in my mind? Or did what I feel for him mean something real, real enough not to shake so quickly.

A knock on my window scares me. It’s another one of the set assistants—Damien, waving at me. I guess I’ve just been parked staring into space. Oops.

“You need a coffee,” he tells me when I join him.

“Can you believe I’ve already had one?”

“I can probably find you a line of coke somewhere on set if you need something stronger?”

“Damien,” I pretend to be scandalized. But after working with these people over the last few years it was a pretty normal sight to see. “Ease into it first.”

He laughs, “I’m joking. I know you’re not…”

“I know,” it gets a bit awkward as it usually did with Damien and I when we started joking. “I’m joking too.”

His face flushes and I welcome someone calling me over to leave the awkward.

The day passes in a blur, the art director had a last minute change sending me to a local antique store trying to source props which was part of the job I enjoyed. With my headphones in I was in a world of structured creativity.

While I look through gold frames one of Harry’s songs comes on and I skip it automatically. I wasn’t quite ready to listen to his addictive voice croon about lovers of his past.

Not that I hadn’t tried going on dates of my own. But the thought of what-if kept me committing to anyone. If I thought about it for long enough it was actually annoying—how he somehow managed to still block my romantic life.

I’m invited for drinks after we’re done shooting for the day. Even though it’s pretty late I decide to say yes. Lately I’d spent my evenings when Deanna’s out just drinking by myself and being miserable. May as well drink with coworkers.

And I actually missed having regular coworkers, like I used to have Winnie. Shit talking about work to destress and drink was one of the highlights of making friends at work.

I have more to drink than I intended, and a small voice in my brain tells me that the amount of alcohol I’d been having recently might be a sign I’m losing it a little. But I order one last drink to shut it up.

At one point I start talking about horoscopes with someone in the bathroom and she ends up showing me how to use the lipstick I complimented them on to overline my lips, and I somewhat remember signing someone’s napkin and telling them to keep it for a few years and what it would be worth.

I also text Deanna an assortment of things and try to call my sister for a pressing matter that I can’t remember when it goes to voicemail. I end up babbling about drinking too much and needing to cut back.

I don’t know what time it is by the time I’ve ridden my high but I want to go home. I huddle by the entrance trying to remember if I came with a jacket tonight or not.

“You’re not driving home tonight are you?” Damien pops up beside me. We’d chatted throughout the night but I’d avoided any awkwardness by constantly inviting other people into the conversation. But right now he has me cornered.

“I’m a very responsible adult Damien,” I slur. “I am getting a taxi.”

“I can drive you home?” He offers.

“You were drinking too mister.”

“No,” he touches the tip of his nose. “I just had a beer and switched to soda afterwards.”

“That’s cheating,” I touch his nose and he laughs. I laugh too.

“We were invited out to drink,” he shrugs. His face flushes. “They didn’t specify what.”

“Cheater,” I tease. “D’you have a car?”

“I could drive yours home? And take an uber home from yours. We don’t live too far away.”

“No way!” I clutch my purse to me. “Nobody drives my car.”

“I didn’t realize you were so possessive.”

“It’s my car!” I let him know.

“But it’s parked on the street. You can’t leave it here weirdo.”

He had a point. Damnit.

“Fine,” I hand him my purse. He opens it tentatively and pulls the keys out.

“I just need these,” he hands my purse back.

“I need those back,” I remind him.

“I know,” he laughs, his hand coming down on my shoulder to lead me out. It sends a shiver down my spine. “I’m parking it in your garage and handing them right back.”

“Good.” I nod.

I pick the music until he tells me I shouldn’t go into singing and he switches the radio to a classical station. I pretend to snore.

“At least it might sober you up.” He pats my leg before snatching his hand off when he realizes he’d touched my bare thigh.

“I don’t feel so good.”

“I know, how much did you drink tonight y/n?”

“No I really don’t feel good.” I complain.

“Shit,” he mutters. “Just hold on.”

I do, I grip my door handle and will myself not to throw up in my car. I was at least lucid enough to know I would hate myself for having to clean it up tomorrow.

He pulls into a Trader Joe’s and I launch myself out in time to throw up on the pavement.

“Are you o-“

“Stop!” I splay my hand out behind me. This was embarrassing enough I didn’t need him to see me actually be sick. “Don’t come closer just…”

“I’ll get you some water.” He calls out and walks away.

How pathetic, I think. How pathetic was I.

Suddenly I want to cry and be left alone. I don’t want Damien driving me home, I don’t want to be drunk, and I don’t want to be here in the middle of nowhere.

When Damien gets back I’m sitting on the curb of a garden bed at the edge of a parking lot. He hands me the water and some electrolytes and gives me space which I’m grateful for. He does linger halfway in the driver’s seat and my anxiety builds until I get up and head back to the car.

“Someone kept calling you,” Damien mentions when I open my door. “I picked up after the third call. I didn’t want to bother you out there.”

“Oh, was it my roommate? Deanna?”

“No,” he scratches the back of his neck. I stare at him, waiting for him to sit back in the car and take me home. I wasn’t having fun anymore.

“Okay…?” I grab my phone from the centre console so I can check myself.

“Someone named Harry? He sounded worried?”

I look up at Damien, wondering if it was a joke even though I know it’s not. He doesn’t even know Harry. His face reflects back an awkward realization.

“Oh.” I can’t get out anything more. I could be decent and tell him that wasn’t my boyfriend—it wasn’t until this moment that I realized Damien was looking at me as more than just a casual friend. And a part of me wonders if that’s the only reason he was helping me out tonight. Then I banish the thought��that was rude. “Thanks for…letting me know.”

“I guess you don’t live with him if your roommate’s name is Deanna,” he tries to joke as he finally gets into the car.

“No that would be hard,” I reply. “He doesn’t live in the states.”

“Long distance,” he nods. I don’t reply and the car goes deathly silent as he drives me the rest of the way home.

I check my phone in the silence, Harry’s texted me. Before he called it seems:

Hey is everything alright?

Y/N I want to call you, you didn’t sound too good in your vm

I’m calling you

Shit! Did I call him first?

My face heats up with a stabbing sensation and I try to blink away the headache that was forming.

I check my call logs and sure enough after calling Deanna I’d called Harry. Why had I called him? I don’t even remember what I said in my voice message.

I groan.

“Is everything ok?” Damien asks.

“No I feel like shit-“

“Do you need me to stop again-“

“No.” I wave his concern away. “I just need to get home.”

I feel bad for him. I didn’t think I was leading him on in any way and yet he had driven me home because he liked me? I decide I’d call him his Uber myself to make it even. To feel like I didn’t owe him something.

When I finally drudge up my stairs to my bedroom I can barely be bothered to remove my clothes or take off my makeup. But my brain is wired thinking about Harry, how he called me.

I must still be somewhat drunk because as I lay horizontally in bed with half of my clothes on the floor I pick up the phone and call him.

H’s POV:

“Hi,” her voice is small and tired. My heart squeezes just hearing it.

“Y/n, you’re alright.”

“Yeah sorry, I think I mis-called you instead of my sister. Your names are beside each other.”

“So you were spilling your guts to your sister then?” I smile.

“Spilling my guts?” I can hear the strain in her voice.

I let her worry for a second longer, “No I’m joking.”

“Oh my god,” she sighs. “What did I say? Please tell me it was nothing embarrassing? It had to be bad if you called me right?”

“It wasn’t bad.” It wasn’t. But she sounded really drunk for a Wednesday night and she was blabbering about drinking too much these days, and needing to stop. It made more sense now that I knew it was for her sister. “But you sounded very drunk. I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

Sort of. I just wanted an excuse to call her and life had given me a pretty one.

It was stupid that I needed an excuse to call y/n after everything we went through. But truth was I had tried to get on with my life after we drifted away. And I think I did a decent job. I made the missing part shaped like y/n smaller and smaller until it didn’t bother me as much she wasn’t around. That we didn’t talk.

It was weird because she was a constant for a year—whether I liked it or not we had to be around each other all the time while she worked for me. Right up to the end even as things soured, as I wore regret like a second skin and forced myself to continue being the dick that she came to know me as.

And then she left and it felt like loosening my tie; breathing a little easier because I wasn’t always so hyperaware of her in the same room or next room over, about how she looked that day or the way she smelled, the joke she made or how angry she was with me.

Yet it didn’t help that she lingered everywhere.

But then I got to have her. All of her for a few weeks and letting her go after that felt more akin to torture than living with the regret for months while she worked for me. It was worse because I had her and I had to let her go.

I thought I knew what falling felt like, what it felt like to love somebody in all their flaws and be seen in return. But then I met y/n, fell for y/n, and everything changed.

“I’m okay,” she says softly. “I’m home in bed now.”

“Good,” I want to ask her about him. The bloke that answered the phone.

“Where are you?” She asks suddenly. “Isn’t it very early there?”

“Nearly half past 6,” I say looking at my watch. “And I’m at the gym.”

“That’s early,” she comments.

“I’m a morning gym person now.”

“Watch out world,” she says. It’s sleepy and makes me think of her curled into me on the sofa as our voices dim into sleep. Then nudging her to stay over and falling asleep in bed with me. So many hours of movies gone unwatched because we were too busy just being in each other’s presence.

The thing was, I had to let her go; you can’t cage a bright and vibrant woman like her. But it hurt doing that.

It sucked being selfless.

“You sound tired,” I say even though I want her on the line. Even if it’s to hear the sound of her breathing. “You should go to bed.”

“Sorry,” she whispers. “I didn’t mean to worry you.”

My breath catches in my throat. I wanted to worry about her, to be close to her enough to worry. And the want of it feels like being punched in the gut.

“You there?” She asks.

“Yeah. Yep, sorry.” I clear my throat. “I’m still here. And it’s fine. I know what can happen when you get drunk, I’m glad you left me the voicemail.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.” I miss you. I miss you so often I worry I’ll be stuck with the loss of you forever. And I care so much about you that I can’t risk ruining your life by having you.

“At least I didn’t have to go to the hospital this time.” She jokes. Her speech grows slower as I’m sure sleep pulls her in.

“No. Seemed like you would’ve had help though.” I comment. Fuck. I couldn’t resist.

“If I knew any better Mr. Styles,” she says. “I’d think that sounds like jealousy.”

She’s teasing me, I can hear it in her voice. But my heart pounds as she calls me out.

“Goodnight y/n,” I say cowardly.

“Goodnight Harry,” she replies. I wait for her to hang up first.

That morning, I have an incredibly productive gym session.

Your POV:

I remember last night in bits and pieces and I’m mostly embarrassed but I can’t stop hearing Harry’s voice in my head. The way he sounded when he said he was glad I left him the voicemail. How he sounded almost jealous at the idea that whoever picked up the phone could be more than a friend. I feel sucked right back to half a year ago when I couldn’t get him out of my mind.

The one thing I did know though, I had to really cut back on the drinking.

I go into work with a bag of doughnuts and hope nobody remembers last night in detail. I make sure to thank Damien and he’s as awkward as ever.

My thoughts are replaced by business and set instructions as the day goes on and I’m grateful for that.

At home I dissect the phone call with Deanna and when I’ve had enough I try to distract myself by asking about her life.

In a way talking to Harry again was like taking an elephant-sized step backwards—it felt like I was in the same headspace of wondering about him and yearning for him all over again. I found myself looking him up, checking to find new information on his life. Even when I could just text him and get the answers straight from him.

A couple weeks later as I park my car in my garage and make my way up to my apartment I get a call. It’s him.

“Hi? Harry?” I answer.

“There she is!” He says loudly into the phone. I have to pull it from my ear.

“Jeez you’re loud,” I comment.

“I need you to be louder,” he laughs. And I realize why he’s called. I check the time, it must be near midnight in the UK.

“Are you drunk dialling me?” My face stretches into a smile and it feels like a betrayal. Why did this man affect me so easily.

“I thought that’s what we did nowadays! Call each other drunk!”

“That was once,” I enter my apartment and put away my things while we talk.

“You’ve unlocked the garden door,” he continues. “And now I have stepped through. I am calling you.”

“He rhymes even when he’s drunk!”

“I write music!”

“I know,” I laugh. “Good music.”

“D’you listen to me?” He asks. “I never asked you that.”

“Mmm not really my taste,” I tease.

“S’cuse me?!” He sounds offended. “I have heard your taste and my music is for your palate.”

“No I don’t think so,” I was having fun.

“Y/n.” He says seriously. “I have heard you listening to Troye Sivan.”

“And? Are you comparing yourself with that fine man?”

He sputters and I continue winding him up until I finally confess: “I listen to your music. Just not lately.”

“Why?” He sounds sad.

“Are you drinking by yourself?” I ask. I imagine him in his living room, knocking back a few bottles.

“Yes. I’m drinking all by my lonely self. Because you’re not here.”

“Lonely self? That’s not what the papers say,” I say without meaning to.

“Y/n,” he lets out a small laugh. “Y/n y/n y/n. If I knew any better I’d think that sounds like jealousy.”

“Oh you’ve been keeping that in your back pocket!” I flush.

“Mhm,” he hums happily.

God, it hits me, what were we doing.

The line goes silent and I try to muster a positive voice to ask something to keep the conversation going but I find I can’t. I feel heavy and sad, like there’s a weight in my chest that’s pulling me down.

“Y/n,” he murmurs. Goosebumps erupt across my chest and I recall a memory of that exact voice in my ear with our hands entangled in his bed.

The ache in my chest grows stronger. So strong I nearly confess three words I barely admitted to myself.

I didn't understand it; how a man that made my life so miserable for so long could tug forth such intensity and longing.

He'd explained it to me—told me why he became what he did. And it just endeared me to him more.

Every man l've dated since, even the man I thought was it for me-Gray, never made me reach so deep into any feeling I was scraping the bottom looking for more.

He knew me enough to nudge me towards this new chapter of my life. This (forced) career change. He knew me in a way nobody else has. It was hard to let that go.

But he wasn't planning on sticking around for any of it—why.

“Why,” I start to ask. I bite my tongue before my impulsivity gets the better of me.

“What?” Harry asks.

“Oh nothing,” I try to play it off.

“You asking something?”

“Nope,” I deny.

“Just ask don’t be shy,” Harry taunts. “Y/n isn’t shy.”

“I-“ I’m tempted but I shake my head and then realize he can’t see me. “It’s nothing.”

“If it’s nothing then say it.” He pushes. He was pushy for being so drunk.

“Why did you stop talking to me?” I ask quickly.

The line goes quiet again.

“It takes two,” he replies. “To stop.”

“But why did you stop?” I ask.

“It wasn’t enough,” he states simply like it should make sense to me. But it doesn’t.

“What?”

“I thought you didn’t want to talk to me anymore. You got cold.”

“Cold?!”

“Yes!” He shouts again.

“Too loud,” I complain.

“Sorry,” he whispers. “You got cold like…like ice. You got icy. You iced me out.”

“No I didn’t,” I deflect his accusation.

“You did! And it wasn’t enough. And I thought y/n doesn’t like me so I let you go.”

What!? I try to make sense of his drunk ramblings. It’s because I was fired from my job, I was lost and spiralling and I stopped talking. I stopped responding to his texts as much until they stopped coming altogether.

“I didn’t like you a long time ago,” I tell him. “That stopped after we talked. After you explained things.”

“Why did you stop?” He asks me instead.

“I…I was going through a rough time. I didn’t mean to but after a while I just thought it was for the better.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you were going through a rough time?” Harry asks with a surprising tone of clarity. “Why didn’t you let me help?”

“I didn’t want you to help.”

Maybe I did ignore Harry’s messages because I didn’t want to admit where I was. To admit that I needed his help. And I was too stubborn to admit that his connections in the industry could help me further kickstart my new career. That I could lean on him for help but it felt like cheating in an industry that liked to brag about working hard to earn where you got to. So I’d avoided him.

Jeez. I hadn’t even admitted that to myself until now. And suddenly the shame comes back tenfold. A creeping heat spreads up my neck alongside a slow squeezing of my chest as the silence stretches. I feel exposed and I want to bury myself under my blankets until the feeling passes.

“Why?” His voice breaks a little. I grit my teeth.

“I don’t know.”

“Y/n,” he says my name again and I want to cry. Because I say I don’t know but I do. And so does he. “Why are you building your walls again?”

I can’t speak, I’m so choked up with emotion and the last thing I want to do is cry over the phone to a drunk Harry. Unless this conversation sobered him up. Which is even more embarrassing.

"What do want us to be?" He asks suddenly.

"You can't ask me that," I say nervously, but the question zips through me in a frenzy.

"No you're right" he sighs noisily. "I think about you.”

"Me too," | whisper. Did he think about me when he was with all those women, I want to ask. Or was it subject to certain moments only.

"You ruined me y/n," he says it so softly I think maybe he hasn't said it at all. But he repeats it even lower and I know I didn't hear it twice.

My heart sings the same tune, and then I realize: how did I expect him to stay in touch and continue on with our lives when part of us would always be looking back at each other.

“I should go,” I try to keep my voice steady. “It’s getting late and Deanna’s coming home soon and I have to-“

“Okay,” he says but the word is laced with more. It’s okay.

“Okay.” I return. Will it be?

Silence again. The tears coating my lashes land on my cheeks and I wipe it away.

“I like hearing your voice,” Harry says.

“Me too,” I sniff.

“Goodnight y/n y/l/n.”

“Goodnight Har.”

***

I meant to text Harry after that conversation. I meant to apologize or say something—create a bridge that we can meet in the middle of. Even if it’s just as friends.

Me and him have been through a lot together, and so much on our own whilst around each other. We should be able to be friends, long-distance, pining but friends. It couldn’t be that hard.

And yet my fingers hover over his name every lunch break and bedtime. I think about him so much it becomes a permanent fixture in my brain.

And yet I never message him. Weeks go by and it stays quiet. Even from him.

On the final day on set I join some of the team for dinner and drinks. I stick to a single glass of wine and promise Damien I could drive myself home. I’d set him up with someone else on set who I noticed eyeing him with a lingering look and they had spent most of the night talking. It was sweet.

The group reminisces about the shoot and everyone pipes in about projects they were going to move onto soon. I didn’t have anything lined up right now so I listen to everyone else.

As night creeps up on us and people start to leave slowly, I text Deanna I was heading home too. After the night I spent drinking too much I’d taken to letting her know where I was and when I was heading home to make sure I stayed lucid enough on nights out. Otherwise we had agreed she would come and get me.

I step out with Damien and the girl he’s become attached to after tonight. We chat outside the place for a bit as her uber arrives and Damien points out he had driven today and parked nearby.

“I don’t know why we didn’t walk up long time ago,” I laugh and turn to Damien. “Don’t worry Damien I don’t need you to drive me home this time.”

“Uhh that’s good,” he says and motions behind me to my car with widened eyes.

“Yes,” I say with a smile. I spin around to my car and freeze.

The last person I ever expected to see leans against my passenger door, arms crossed and smiling with that smile that says I see you and I don’t care what you’re doing but I’m glad I’m here with you.

“Hi,” Harry says softly, his eyes twinkling under the street light.

“Hi?” I gape. “Wh-how-what are you…oh my god!”

His smile grows to a full grin as I throw myself at him and it’s like my mind and my whole world quiets. Like I never knew how loud everything was up until I felt the silence in his arms. Like everything would be okay because he was here.

“Oh god,” I turn back to Damien, remembering he was here too. “Sorry—I wasn’t expecting him to be here-“

“Is this Harry?” Damien asks.

I look at Harry and nod in response. Harry’s eyes flash with something as he leans forward and shakes Damien’s hand.

“I didn’t realize by Harry you meant Harry Styles uh it’s nice to meet you?” Damien’s awkwardness comes back in full force.

Harry’s eyes flicker between Damien and I and I remember that he thought there was something going on here.

“Damien and I worked together on set. Today’s actually our last day!”

“Yeah!” Damien fidgets. “It was a cool time…”

“Yeah?” Harry lights up slowly, realization dawning on him too. “Well I have to say thanks mate, for taking care of her the other night. That was you right?”

“Oh right when I picked up your call,” Damien nods. “Shit I didn’t realize who I was speaking to…” We laugh as Damien grows more awkward. “Anyway I’ll leave you two alone. G’night Y/N. Nice meeting you Harry.”

“Goodnight!” I wave him off.

I turn back to Harry with a huge grin. “You totally thought he was with me didn’t you?”

“Can you blame me?” He asks, his hand coming down on my waist, tugging me towards him. I go without hesitation.

“You’re here,” I take his face in my hands. “How? Why? When? Tell me everything.”

“I was in town,” he starts.

“Really?” I raise a brow.

He laughs, and hearing it rumble through his chest while his arms encircle me feels like a shot of espresso straight to my heart.

"Y/n," his mouth forms my name. I want to taste the way that feels again. See if that's changed too.

"You're here."

"How did you know?" I ask even though I knew it had to be Deanna.

“I have my sources,” he smiles secretly. We can’t stop smiling.

He brushes my hair to the side and it feels like a dream. He was here. He was gathering my face in his hands, hands I only dreamed of.

“I was in town,” he begins again. “Because I couldn’t stop thinking of you.”

My breath catches and I can't stop staring at him; he looks even more handsome and chiseled than the last time I saw him.

He looked like something that made my heart sing and my stomach tingle.

I trace my hand up his arm and around his shoulder. I want him to kiss me, I want to feel his arms around me.

He laughs which makes me laugh but neither of us take our eyes off of each other.

He reaches up, fingers threading through my hair. "Is this okay?"

"You're always okay," | say which makes him laugh again. What I mean to say is we're okay. Whatever you want to do is okay, as long as it's with me.

"I missed you." He whispers in my ear and it travels right to the centre of my heart.

"Prove it." I respond.

His mouth is delicate as it presses against mine, whispering soft words against them. They make me ache with a hunger I'd only ever felt around him.

When he looks at me again his eyes are more black then green but I recognize them the same. I don’t know how we’re going to make the trip back home when clearly we just want to soak each other in again.

I have an idea.

I open the backseat and Harry looks at me with a mischievous smile.

“Really?”

“You’re not getting lucky,” I roll my eyes with a smile. “But I really want to kiss you indecently and this is the closest place to do that.”

With a laugh he hustles in, tossing something in the backseat, and I follow, every inch of my body aflame. He shuts the door behind me and meets me halfway.

***

Waking up to Harry is better than catching up with him last night. Because things are so much more real when they remain the morning after. It doesn’t feel like just a dream.

“G’morning,” he mumbles when our eyes meet. He looks sleepy but content. Or maybe that’s just how I feel.

“Morning,” I smile, suddenly feeling shy. Last night was all passion and fun but the reality sets in this morning—what were we? Where were we going from here? “M’gonna brush my teeth.”

He follows me into the bathroom, luckily Deanna’s already headed off for work. He brushes with me in the small sink and we can’t stop looking at each other through the mirror. Like our eyes were magnets and they couldn’t help but find their way to the other’s.

“So did you really come all this way for me?” I ask as I brew us coffee. “Does anybody know you’re here?”

He tilts his head, “a couple people know I’m here but everyone thinks I’m just taking some time before we wrap up my album next month.”

“What!” I stop what I’m doing to give him my full attention. “You’re nearly done?”

“Yeah!” He comes closer to me, taking the coffee pot from my hand. “Final sound editing at the studio up north. So I’m s’pose to be here next month anyway but I’m just here early. For you.”

I’m afraid to ask, did that mean he was all mine for the next couple weeks of November? But the moment passes and I continue putting together a breakfast.

“I can’t believe you’re here,” I say for the millionth time.

“Me too,” he kisses the side of my neck and helps me carry our coffees to the table. “I intend to spend as much time with you as possible.”

He answers my unasked question and I feel like I’m glowing from the inside. “Yeah well I just finished on set so I’m unemployed until the next thing I’m on. So I’m all yours.”

“How’s that all going? Tell me.”

So I do. I take him through the sets I’ve been on and the people I’ve worked with. He asks great questions and I feel so deeply seen and not just because he doesn’t take his eyes off of me once.

The conversation leads to a repeat of last night and we end up spending most of the day in bed but I wasn’t complaining.

“I haven’t done this in ages,” he says with a kiss on my head. “Just stayed wrapped up in sheets all day.”

“I think the last time I did this was in London, with you.” I kiss his chin. “That feels so long ago.”

“Every day without you feels so long,” Harry says. “I shouldn’t have let it get this long.”

I shrug, “Yeah. I think I convinced myself it was good. We were fine like that. But now that I have you my god that was too long.”

He chuckles and pulls me into a deeper kiss. He tastes like sleepy familiarity and his hands grip me in places that have made a home for his fingers. I think I was in love with this man.

“What?” Harry asks. I must have paused. “You alright?”

“Yeah yeah,” I go back to kissing him but he pulls away. “No I’m fine! Promise.”

He believes me.

We spend a few days just doing nothing but everything with each other. I introduce him to Deanna and we do dinner together with Harry in a costume so he doesn’t get recognized. Deanna finds it very amusing and so do I. Harry seems tense and I worry it’s because we’re laughing at him but he reassures me it’s not.

I know it wasn’t going to last forever, Harry had a busy life to get back to, but I savour the slow moment we have all to ourselves.

Near the end of the week, while I’m driving us out to a hiking spot Harry brings up something on his mind.

“Can I say something, and you can’t get mad?”

“Well I can’t guarantee that.”

“Try not to?” He asks.

“Maybe.” I can’t promise him that.

“Fine I’ll settle with maybe,” he jokes.

“So are you going to tell me?” I eye him as I pull into the parking lot. He had gone silent.

“Yes, I’m getting to that.” He bites his lip. “Don’t take this the wrong way but you seem a bit distant. Not from me just…from yourself.”

“I seem distant from myself?” I laugh.

“Yeah,” he fidgets with his belt and we exit the car. “Like the y/n I know is only 70% there.”

“What?!”

“No see now don’t go getting mad love,” he says and his pet name only softens the moment slightly. “I just wonder if you’re really alright.”

“Of course I am,” I bristle.

“You always have this fire about you but right now-.”

“Jeez Har, if you’re comparing me to before in London I was more high strung than usual, constantly stressed and having personal issues with my ex. And you were making my life hell. Why are you comparing me to her?”

“No I know!” Harry tries to hold my arm but I brush him off and speed away down the trail. But his stupid long legs catch up easily. “This isn’t coming out how I meant to. But even when we were together last spring. You were still you. You just seem a little sad?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I pull away from him more. “You can’t go MIA for months then pop back into my life and tell me I’ve changed like it’s a bad thing.”

“Y/n you’re purposely not understanding me here,” Harry starts to grow frustrated beside me and it makes me less frustrated sharing the emotion. Like I said—I was very healthy. “I’m not saying you’ve changed. Or that changing is a bad thing! I think you’re a lot more confident and stronger than ever before. I’m just saying your light’s been a bit dimmer in the time I’ve been with you and I’m worried you’re going through something you’re not sharing.”

“Oh my god,” I feel tears prick my eyes and I blink them away before stuffing my glasses onto my face. “My light’s been dimmer? Seriously? I’m fine. I’m okay Harry. You don’t have to worry-“

“But I want to-“

“Well you don’t. And it’s a little late to try and pry me open and dissect what you think is wrong with me.”

“Well I’ve already pried you open it’s the dissecting part that—ow!”

I’ve hit him with my bottle and he shuts up. He was so not funny.

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes. “But I’m here if you want to talk.”

Too little too late, I think bitterly. And the strength of the bitterness surprises me. I stay quiet, not wanting to spew anything I’ll regret later. He trails behind, giving me the space I need.

Apparently I was bitter about our time apart. But I know that wasn’t entirely his fault—I’d admitted to pushing him away because I’d been too embarrassed. Too stubborn to accept I could use his help. So what was it?

I didn’t think I was any less myself than I was a year ago. But as soon as I think it I know it’s untrue.

I sigh and let the sunlight filtering through the coastal oaks and shrubbery warm my skin. Harry continued a steady pace behind me and I feel slightly sorry for getting so defensive.

I continue one step at a time on the worn path walked by so many. I’d done this several times with friends and it was supposed to be special doing it with Harry but I’ve just ruined it.

I ruined it.

If I was any lesser than in my personality, like Harry said, it was probably because I ruined things. And I was upset with myself. I feel like I let Harry go, that I failed at the career I thought I was going to spend a lifetime. I ruined the thing between Harry and I with pride, by pushing him away! And life’s beaten me down with it.

I haven’t been being very honest with myself. Because the truth did hurt. And I’ve been a wimp.

I glance back at Harry but his head his down, his head of curls bouncing at the effort of the uphill slope. My heart floods with warmth just looking at him and I can’t believe I’ve been an idiot.

“Harry,” I stop in the middle of the trail and he nearly bumps into me. He steadies himself on my shoulder and I grasp his hand there before he can remove it. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be a bitch back there.”

“It’s alright.” He squeezes my shoulder, but his eyes are still wary. “I shouldn’t have been so insensitive. I do that sometimes.”

“No,” I rush to answer. “No you have a point. And I don’t expect you to ever stop calling me out-“

“Likewise,” he gives me a small smile that feels like relief.

“You’re right. I just don’t think I’ve sat long enough to accept it.”

His finger brushes my cheek, wiping the fallen tear. I was not supposed to cry!

“Let’s keep going,” he suggests and I’m grateful for that.

“I think,” I sniffle as my body strains to finish the final stretch of our hike. “I feel like I should be happy and grateful for where I am now. I’m actually really passionate about this new work I’ve been taking on! But a part of me feels like I’m going through the motions. And that makes me feel so shitty.”

My life in London had crashed and burned but it had felt full. Out here I was so spread apart from everyone, I no longer worked at a steady job, and the only person I had was Deanna. Sometimes I think I relied on her too much.

“I think you expect too much of yourself,” Harry puts his hand around my shoulder as we near the end and even though I’m sweaty and it’s kind of gross I let him. “I know how that goes.”

“Yeah maybe,” I brush away another tear. “I just don’t feel very present. I’m either living in the future or living in the past.”

Harry’s face twists into what I can only describe as a knowing grimace.

“Well we made it,” I gesture to the open water below us. We stand for a little while, breathing it in. It reminds me of the first music video set I’d been on with him. When we were getting along and he had seen my enthusiasm for that sort of thing.

“I’ve been living in the past a lot.” Harry admits. “More than usual.”

“Why?” I ask.

“Y/n,” he says and I turn to look at him. Right, I flush. Me.

“What the fuck did we do to each other?” I ask and we laugh. And then laugh some more, releasing a tension neither of us realized we were carrying.

We end up sitting in the ground catching our breaths again. He pulls me into his chest and kisses the top of my head.

“I don’t know how we keep screwing up.”

“It should be a record,” I laugh. “We really don’t know how to deal with each other.”

“Fucking hell,” he laughs.

“What do we do?” I look up into his eyes that are deeper than the forest we hiked through. They’re so full of love that I could drown in them willingly.

“Firstly I should tell you something, long overdue.” He says. He kisses me with a sweetness before telling me, “I’m madly in love with you. I never thought I could feel this way about someone.”

“Well I don’t know how that someone could be me,” I joke but mostly to cover up just how hard his words hit.

“You wound up in my life when I was at my worst-“

“And taken you even lower,” I joke again.

“No.” He brushes my cheek. “No, that was my own doing. You made me believe I could be better. That I should be better, that I shouldn’t be defined by past mistakes. I love you y/n.”

Woah. I wasn’t expecting that.

I scramble to sit up and face him. “Seriously?”

“So serious.”

“Harry,” I hold his face in my hands. It was true, something I barely admitted to myself but as I roll the words through my head it feels true.

“Don’t feel pressured to-“

“I love you too Harry. God. I love you. That felt good to say.”

He laughs and pulls me to him, and even though we’re smiling too hard to actually get a proper kiss in it’s one of the most romantic moments of my life.

“I don’t think this is going to solve our issues,” he says once we’ve dusted ourselves off and prepare to say goodbye to the view. “But I want to try to stay connected.”

“You’ve told me you love me there’s no getting rid of me now.” I warn him.

“I was scared,” he confesses. “I never told you I wanted you to stay. That I wanted you so fucking badly because I was scared you would get so overwhelmed by my life, how much is in the public eye and all of that. I don’t want to subject you to that-“

“We’ve already been papped together remember?” I raise a brow. He blushes as the memory surfaces.

“The night I acted like a complete arse yeah thanks for reminding me.”

“Look at you blushing,” I pat his cheek. He brushes me off. “But I know what I’m getting myself into Harry. I’ve worked for you! I know how public your life is. And we can figure it out.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes!” I reassure him.

“Does that mean…?”

“What are you asking Mr. Styles?”

“Please don’t call me that again,” he groans. “I don’t want to be Mr. Styles to you anymore.”

“No?”

“Only if you’d be Mrs. Styles.”

Now it’s my turn to flush. He laughs at me the same way I did him.

“Harry I barely know what I’m doing with my life. But I do know I love you, and I want to be with you. So I’ll figure the life stuff out as long as I get to have you.”

“That’s very romantic.” He teases.

“I know,” I smile.

“Good. I’d give up the life I have now if it means getting to have you Y/N.”

“Romantic enough,” I tease.

“Remember when we realized we had been at the same Coldplay concert and-“

“Not this again,” I groan. “I’m not bloody asking you to give up your fame and money to start a family.”

“I know I know!” He laughs. “But I just want to tell you that you could. I wouldn’t mind.”

I fan myself, “It’s getting too romantic. Let’s get out of here.”

And that’s the note on which we make our way back down to our car, completely different how we made our way up. It sets the tone for the remainder of his time here.

8 months later:

“G’morning!” I wave to the front desk and walk to the elevator that would take me up to the apartment I called home now. It was spring in the city I’ve grown to love again.

“Is that you?” Harry’s voice calls out when I walk to the kitchen.

“Yes! And I have coffee!” I shout back. I couldn’t sleep last night—first day jitters that I always got when working on a new set.

“Bollocks!” Harry’s voice sounds closer. “I was supposed to do that for you for first day on set.”

“Too bad,” I push the coffee towards him on the island but he ignores it to come to me instead.

“Is it?” He arches a brow. His hands are already running up my sides and my breathing grows shallow. He never failed to pull this reaction from me. Even when we “hated” each other.

I can’t take the teasing so I lean up to press my mouth to his and the coffee is forgotten as he lifts me up on the island and trails his lips down my body. I didn’t need caffeine when I had this.

No. Wait. I had a job to get to.

“Harry,” I try to grab his face back up. “Harry, love, I can’t-fuck.”

“Sorry,” he smiles up at me sheepishly and if I could take a shot of that face it would seriously sustain me for the rest if my life.

“I can’t.” I pout.

“I know. Sorry I got carried away.”

“Drink your coffee,” I steal one last kiss. “Now I feel like I need a cold shower.”

His laugh echoes through the room. “I said I was sorry!”

He dramatically moves to the opposite end of the island and sits down, holding the coffee up to his face. “Mmmm.”

I smile at the man who had my soul and heart. I was so glad I’d made the plunge to move back to where he was.

After Harry left the States when he finished his album we had tried our best at long-distance. I was afraid to uproot my life to London again and he was willing to move out to San Francisco but I didn’t want him to. I knew his life was in London.

We tried going back and forth for a couple months. I’d invited him back home to Burbank during one of those trips and everyone had hit it off. It almost felt like the missing piece I was looking for to take the plunge. To decide once and for all I was moving away again.

The last time I moved I was running away from everything I knew because I thought it would gain me independence and a life I craved. But ultimately I came crawling back home.

This time I take the leap running to something.

I miss being closer to family, and living with my best friend. I beg Deanna to visit every time we catch up but recently she’s told me she’s moving in with the guy she’s been dating and it makes me feel less bad about leaving her behind again.

Harry decided to move his work life out of the flat to give me privacy, now his team worked out of a small office in central and sometimes I popped by when he was there. We tried to keep ourselves out of the limelight, and so far things had stayed private.

“I’m going to pick you up tonight,” Harry reminds me. “Are you sure I can’t give you a lift there too?”

“No I want to take the train,” I insist. I needed my first day to be independently mine.

We chit chat as we finish breakfast and then I’m out the door again towards my first day. It’s a cool morning but the sun climbs into the sky and I know it was only going to get warmer.

I had promised the city that I’d be back one day and this was it. I had laid down roots once before and I was back to try once more; my heart was open enough to embrace it, healed enough to love it again.

I was embracing life again and it felt like my glow was back.

Jeff keeps asking if you’re showing up to the album launch, Harry texts.

Obviously, does Jeff not want me there? I text—it was a running joke between us ever since we came out to Jeff that he hated us together. His reaction had been surprise and then resignation. He was tight-lipped about us any time he saw us together.

He’d rather you throw the party.

I didn’t miss that part of the job. Now when I look back at my old career I’m not sure how I did it for years. It was a stress I didn’t want back.

He’d have to pay me a million dollars, I text back.

I’ll let him know your new rates

I get to the tube and sit down. As I lose service I get one last text from Harry.

I love you. Break a leg

And then: but don’t get concussed or anything

I roll my eyes but the smile stays on my face. To be loved is to be known but to be loved is also to have someone else know all of your stupid moments and know you won’t ever live them down.

I send back a heart and an eye-roll emoji.

The tradeoff was worth it…most of the time.

#writingsfromhome #harry styles x reader #harry styles fic #harry styles #harry styles fanfic #harry styles imagine #fic #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles series #musician!harry #harry stylesxreader #enemies to lovers #dos and dont’s #epilogue #please know I reviewed this piece only like once so take it for what it is #and yeah

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jxfndm · 5 months ago

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CONRAD FISHER x FEM! READER (ARGUMENT/FLUFF, BEST FRIENDS TO LOVERS)

"out of my mind"

WARNINGS - cussing, mature language/descriptions, alcohol mentions, arguing, content related etc.

CONRAD FISHER

Beer, that’s all I cared about. Belly married Jeremiah, and even though I was getting over it, it still hurt like hell. Even if I didn’t love her anymore.

"Connie, are you gonna work in the lab today or is it another work from home day?" a voice questioned softly. I peeked over the couch I was laying on, to see my best friend standing. Pajamas and all, she was beautiful.

After Jere and Belly got married, I ultimately decided to take a job up in California. I was contracted at a Bio Lab for a year out here, and needed somewhere to stay. Coincidentally, my childhood school best friend, Y/N, was here in California. She had moved after the 8th grade and I never really got to see her up until I started attending Stanford. When we reconnected, I completely forgot about how Belly made me feel, because what I felt for Y/N was more complex, and a lot stronger. Now I was her roommate, and that made things all the more difficult.

"Uh, it’s a lab day, but not until later." I said, finally sitting up and running my hands through my hair. She stayed quiet and nodded, heading towards the kitchen to start on her coffee. Typical.

"Hey, I’m gonna study at the library tonight. Could you just make sure to check on that pipe in the bathroom before you leave? I can call maintenance to come up tomorrow if it’s bad." she questioned flatly. Something seemed off.

"Yeah, no problem." I said, looking over at her. She was completely focused on making her coffee. I got up and sat at the barstools across from her. "Alright, Y/N, what’s up?"

She shrugged. "Nothing, it’s not important."

I sighed, when she closed herself off, it was extremely difficult to get her to open up about what could be bothering her.

Y/N

I stirred my coffee in circles, trying my hardest to ignore the boy who continues to steal my heart everyday.

If I’m being honest, there’s not too much of an issue, other than the fact that because of Jeremiah and Belly’s wedding anniversary coming up, he’s been a completely different person. And even if we have briefly talked about our feelings in the past, I don’t think he even knows what he wants. As for me, I’m just done waiting. He should be moving back home in 2 months, I just had to keep the distance until then.

"Y/N." he called. I faked a smile as I looked at him. "Yes?" I asked. My tone was off, I couldn’t hide that.

"Can we not?" he questioned, annoyance evident in his words. I furrowed my brows at him.

"Can we not what?" I questioned him, looking back down at my coffee. He sighed, loud enough for me to hear it. I gulped, this was hard.

"Can we not go through the back and forth of you closing yourself off? I’m your best friend and we talk about everything, I don’t get why you have to cause so much trouble just to get my attention, you have it already." he snapped. I looked at him in disbelief.

I scoffed. "Trust me, I don’t want your attention." I stated.

"Are you serious? Literally, what is going on? We were just watching a movie yesterday, we almost fucking kissed. What the hell, Y/N." he said, causing my heart to race.

Right. We almost kissed. And if I just allowed it, we probably would’ve made out right on the living room floor.

"Don’t bring that into this, Conrad. You don’t know what the hell you’re saying right now." I warned, My face surely showed I was upset, all because he was trying me right now.

"I don’t? But I do, Y/N. You have these stupid little cold attitudes with me when I’ve done nothing to you. And if I have? Then fucking enlighten me, because I must have missed that episode." he scowled. My blood boiled with every word he said.

I knew I would probably regret the next things that came out of my mouth.

"Fuck you, Conrad. Do you know how exhausting it is to be 2nd all the damn time? My God, of course you don’t, not until Belly chose your damn brother over you, but before that, you were always number one to her. And even a year later, you’re still over here with no damn clue about what you want. I’m sick of waiting on you, Conrad. I’ve waited since the 6th grade for you, and I’d rather not waste another minute of my time waiting on you!" I exclaimed, my face was hot. I was so fired up, I barely even realized the stream of tears coming down my face.

I hated that I cried when I was pissed, but it only happened because I really gave a shit about Conrad, but he could care less about me.

"Y/N-" he started. "Just stop. I need to get ready." I said lowly, making my way towards my room, leaving my cup on the counter. I could give 2 shits about my morning coffee right now.

Before I could grab the doorknob to my bedroom, I felt a grasp on my wrist. I closed my eyes, refusing to look at him. I knew if I did, my heart would melt and I’d be waiting for months.

As he turned me towards him, his grasp lightened, and his hands trailed up to my cheek, wiping the tears off my cheek. My eyes were closed, and goosebumps filled my arms feeling the touch of his skin.

"Y/N, please look at me. Please." he begged, almost choking to say it. Though I had my doubts, I opened them slowly to meet his gaze. His eyes were soft, the same eyes I could stare into for days and forget the world was moving around me.

"You are not my second choice, and I promise you that much. Look, I know I’ve been a mess, but it’s not really anything to do with Jere and Belly, it’s everything to do with the way I feel for you." he said. My heart skipped a beat. "Y/N, you mean the world and more to me. I’ve been going back and forth with myself on how to tell you, because if there’s one thing I don’t ever want to fuck up, it’s anything to do with you. I’m out of my mind in love with you, Y/N." he explained, his hands now grabbing mine.

His face was just inches away from mine. The look on his face, his parted lips and pleading eyes, meant one thing, he meant it. I knew him like the back of my hand, it wasn’t hard to tell.

I took that as a sign, and slowly melted into his lips. Be immediately kissed back, pressing me against the wall as his hands grasped at my hips, pulling me closer to him.

Our kiss intensified, as he brought a hand to my neck, softly grabbing it. After a few moments, we finally pulled apart.

"Please don’t shut me out, I want to be here for you. I won’t leave." he pleaded, placing his forehead against mine.

I kissed him once more, a smile plastered on my face. We intertwined our hands as I looked at him and nodded, earning a smile from him.

"You’re so beautiful, never forget that." he commented. I chuckled. "You’ve always been handsome to me."

The rest of the day felt like a dream. From that day on, we spent everyday glued to eachother’s hips, madly in love.

***

a/n - so sorry guys, ive been so busy with trying to register for fall semester and ive been working. for all the connie baby girls, here you gooooo (:

- j

#fanfic #fluff #conrad fisher #tsitp #the summer i turned pretty #christopher briney #bonrad #imagines #best friends to lovers

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yumicreatesworld · 5 months ago

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Betrayal: Gift Rejected, Part 2(a) - Jake Sim

Summary: You decide not to go back to Jake, focusing on self-healing and reconnecting with friends. Months later, you encounter Jake, who apologizes, but you affirm your decision to move on. Eventually, you find strength, new love, and a sense of freedom, knowing you've made the right choice.

Pairing: boyfriend!Jake x girlfriend!reader (featuring ex bestfriend!Yuna)

Rating: PG-13

Word Count: 565

Genre: Contemporary, Romance

Warnings: emotional distress, betrayal, healing process, heartache, emotional turmoil, mention of medical condition

You sit on your bed, staring at your phone, the last message from Jake still unread. It's been three days since you walked away, and every moment has felt like an eternity. The pain from your condition has subsided somewhat, but the ache in your heart remains, a constant reminder of the trust that was shattered.

You take a deep breath and open the message.

"I understand if you need more time, but please let me know you're okay. I miss you, Y/N."

You close your eyes, tears threatening to spill. You miss him too, but the betrayal is too fresh, too deep. You know what you have to do.

You text back, your fingers trembling.

"I'm okay, Jake. But I need more than time. I need to move on."

You hit send before you can second-guess yourself, and the weight on your chest lightens just a little. You can't go back to him. Not after what he did.

---

A week later, you find yourself at a small café, sipping a cup of herbal tea. The warmth soothes you, both physically and emotionally. It's your first step toward healing, taking moments like this to care for yourself.

Your phone buzzes with a new message, this time from Sara, a friend who knows nothing of the recent turmoil but senses your need for companionship.

"Coffee tomorrow? Miss your face!"

You smile and type back a quick yes. It feels good to reconnect, to remember there's a world outside your pain.

---

Months pass, and life slowly begins to feel normal again. You’ve started seeing a new doctor who understands your condition and helps manage it effectively. Your physical pain is under control, and your emotional wounds are healing, too.

One evening, you’re at a gallery opening with Sara, admiring the art when you hear a familiar voice behind you. Turning, you see Jake standing there, looking just as surprised to see you.

“Y/N,” he says, his voice a mix of hope and regret.

“Jake,” you reply, trying to keep your voice steady.

“I... I’ve missed you,” he admits. “I’ve been working on myself, trying to understand why I did what I did.”

You nod, appreciating his honesty but knowing it doesn’t change the past. “I’m glad you’re doing better, Jake. I really am. But I’ve moved on. I needed to.”

He looks down, nodding slowly. “I understand. I just wanted you to know I’m sorry. Truly.”

“Thank you,” you say, and you mean it. “Take care of yourself, Jake.”

He gives you a small, sad smile and walks away, leaving you with a sense of closure you didn’t realize you needed.

Sara comes over, noticing the exchange. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” you say, surprising yourself with how true it feels. “I think I am.”

---

As the months turn into a year, you find yourself stronger than ever. You’ve built a new life, one that doesn’t revolve around past pain. You’ve reconnected with friends, pursued new hobbies, and even started a new relationship, one built on mutual trust and respect.

Standing at the edge of a cliff overlooking the ocean, the wind in your hair, you feel free. You’ve learned to trust yourself again, to prioritize your own happiness. And as you watch the waves crash against the shore, you know you’ve made the right choice.

The future is yours, untainted by betrayal, filled with endless possibilities.

Part 1

Part 2(b)

Thank you so much for reading, I hope you all enjoyed!

#kpop writers #kpop au #kpop drabbles #kpop #enhypen jaeyun #enhypen jake #jake drabble #jake sim #jake au #itzy yuna #shin yuna #x reader

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manicjk · 4 months ago

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Small Town Crazy ~ A Jensen Ackles RPF ~

Pt. 1

A/N: I posted a rough draft of this, but it's been years since I've written anything. The characters and places are mostly just OCs.

~~~~~~

June 17,

“No, man. Does it ever get less intimidating?” Jensen asks, as he sips lightly from the glass he held. He had agreed to meet up with his friend Steve, who was staying in Nashville again. They had played a show the night before, but split right after, so he could rest after flying in from a convention in Nevada,

Steve laughed in response, then answered, “ I can lie and tell ya yes, but we both know better. Probably doesn’t help to be exhausted.”

Jensen had always been a nervous performer, or rather person in general; and it definitely didn’t add any steel resolve that he hadn’t had so much as a night’s rest before their show. He admittedly always channeled his inner Dean Winchester when he felt nervous or tired, he knew he would push through easier that way. He did feel much better after the hot shower, complimentary breakfast (no, he would never turn down a free complimentary breakfast, obviously), and a good 6 hour sleep.

The men shared another laugh, but Jensen had needed to speak to his friend seriously. The comment had only reminded him, “Speaking of, I was meaning to talk to you about what’s going on. Really what i’d like to work on, run it by you, just see how you feel about it.”

“Yeah, no problem, man. What’s up?”

“Well, Nevada was the last of our conventions, at least for now, I don’t have anything lined up to work on, and as you so kindly pointed out- I am a little buffered,” he chuckled, but they both knew it was a serious conversation, “I didn’t know what I was going to do before we started the trip, but I did know I wanted to try to focus on something a little different. I didn’t re-sign my lease in Austin. I’m supposed to go look at an apartment complex in Rockford.”

“Okay, that’s about an hour from here, but your friends and family are back in Texas, that’s a big move, man.”

“It is, but flying to see them isn’t such a big deal. I really think just being in small town life for a minute, giving it a try might help me get back to myself.” He really hadn’t had that, he grew up in a decent sized city, and had stayed busy most of his life. It can be taxing to always try being other people, especially when you do it for so long that your lives seem to blend. That, and that living in Austin, as notorious as it was to be recognized there, it left even less time to have a day off.

“Sure, sure. You know I support you, and I know you wouldn’t even try it if it wasn’t something you thought you needed to do. What are you gonna do?”

“I would like to work on writing some music, maybe explore a few hobbies, just decompress.”

“Well, I don’t really have much to do until later tomorrow night. If you need a partner, i’m down to go check out the place with you. Have you been looking at other places, there a reason you’re gunning for that one?”

“I’d really appreciate that. I looked at a lot actually, in a lot of places, but the views there are real nice, good trails, it seems quaint, but the place doesn’t look bad. The agent I got in touch with said it could be reserved, booked the day, and said if I decide to go with it, we could start with the paperwork whenever.”

“In that case, I think we ought to turn in our glasses and try for some sleep before we make the drive, what do you say?” Steve would back Jensen, they were friends. He didn’t think it would be bad for him to reconnect with himself anyway, afterall, he enjoyed getting back to a peaceful place and working on music too.

–

When Jensen turned in that night, he couldn’t help but feel a bit less tension in his shoulders. He was excited to explore a new chapter of his life.

~~~~

She was just packing away her things, getting ready to leave the factory where she worked. Her clothes were caked in grease and dirt. It had been a rather long day, she felt exhausted, and still she had responsibilities awaiting her at home.

“Hey did you hear what Jason did?” Gia, her co-worker, and ever energetic drama queen asked. Gia was always finding Noel at the end of the night, filling her in on anything and everything happening almost anywhere within the building. It was the most human interaction she had.

“I definitely did not,” she laughed,Gia was dramatic, but she was about the closest thing to a true friend she’s ever had.

“Well, apparently when Mitch -the supervisor on line one- came in he saw Jason with Amy! Like, completely all over each other on the line. It was so gross-” she didn’t mean to zone out, but she knew Gia wouldn’t notice, and also that she knew how busy Noel was. Noel found herself picking back up on the tail end of her rant about their romping co-workers, “-but we can talk about that later. Oh my god, I totally didn’t even realize, I forgot my gear on the line. Love ya, later chick!”

“For sure, can’t wait! Be safe leaving. See you tomorrow.” Noel was anxious to leave. She almost ran to her black Ford, like it was a life raft.

She pulled off her protective glasses, and face mask, throwing them into her door bin with a sigh. Tugging her short dark hair from its bun, she started her car and touched the dial on her radio; her hands were grimey, but it was normal. “Calling You” blared through the speakers, she had a good 30 minute drive home, and all she wanted to do was roll down her windows and enjoy the June breeze through her car. She wanted to feel the wind blow her locks around and hear the radio blare.

Seeing mile markers and road signs getting closer to what she had called home for as long as she could remember; she turned down the long gravel drive, the grass patch growing between the worn tracks, a stark contrast to the concrete and asphalt she had been on moments ago. A long black wooden fence showed through to cattle, and her dogs followed along the fence row.

She got out making sure to give her pets some attention, not bothering to go toward the divided house, but rather straight toward the barn behind it. She flipped on the lights, and got ready to do what she needed to there.

In all her chores, she had managed to forget that her realtor had mentioned someone coming to look at the vacancy tomorrow.

#jensen ackles fic #jensen ackles rpf #jensen ackles #jensen smut #supernatural

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ladylooch · 1 year ago

Note

Does liv act any different after she ends the call with Luca ?

And Luca, will you know hit Ryder a little harder next time they're on the ice together ?

The coolness of Luca’s Wild shirt covers my back and shoulders as I pull it on. It’s a synthetic, work out type material that temporarily feels nice against my skin. Then the extra fabric begins to build sweat between my shoulder blades. I’d take this discomfort over my boyfriend calling me out for being… flirty with another man in front of him.

How could I have been so blind to how we looked together? I’m so embarrassed. Luca took it in stride, even ending the call by suggesting a sexy FaceTime later. I’m so lucky to have him. I stare at the closed door of my bedroom. On the other side is Ryder in my kitchen… baking banana bread… shirtless. Fuck. I shove my face into my pillow, letting out a frustrated yelp. I feel bad about kicking him out. It’s not like we did something wrong, or that he overstepped. That doesn’t seem fair and I don’t want Ryder to think Luca told me he had to go, especially when Luca has been so chill and understanding.

I open the door, tip toeing out to the kitchen. Ryder is leaning against the counter, phone in his hand, scrolling for a new song. His shirt is back on. He looks up at me and gives a shy smile.

“Everything good?”

“Um yeah.” I nod, biting a corner of my lip nervously. “Definitely good. How is the bread looking?”

“I have no idea.” He is sheepish. “I tried to look again, but it doesn’t look quite burnt enough?” I laugh, going to the oven door and opening it up. Warmth washes over my face, making me stick my tongue out at the added heat to an already hot apartment. They need to fix this heating issue ASAP or I’m going to go sleep at Lio’s tonight. Ryder comes closer. My cheeks start to turn pink as his shoulder brushes mine when he looks in too.

“Not done yet.” I confirm, shutting the door quickly.

“The cocktail is done if you are ready to try it?”

“Yeah!” I nod enthusiastically, a little too enthusiastic to over compensate for the awkwardness I feel. He hands me a glass with ice cubes, pink liquid, and a salted rim. Tequila slaps my pallet on the first sip, then bright citrus and a good, balanced sweetness coats my mouth to finish. “Oh….” I murmur, then trail off. “Very good.”

“Thank you. I think in another life I could have been a great mixologist.”

“If you weren’t a Hughes kid?” Ryder’s eyes cloud over a bit in resentment. Not much of his life wasn't chosen for him by his family lineage.

“Yeah… well you know.”

“Lio probably more than me, but yeah.”

“I’m glad we have reconnected as adults. We had fun when we were kids.” I barely remember those days. So much has happened since we lived in New Jersey and our fathers played together in the NHL. Most of my childhood memories revolve around Switzerland.

“Yeah, I’m glad we have become friends.” I answer honestly, looking down at the top of my drink.

“Are you… sure everything is good? I can leave if…” He trails off.

“No. Everything is great. I just. Um. You know I really value our friendship.” I purse my lips afterwards, meeting his gaze head on. He stares back at me for a moment. The understanding is clear in his eyes as he nods. We are friends. That is it.

“Yeah. Me too, Livy. You’re kinda becoming my best friend here. I wouldn’t jeopardize that.” I nod in response. “I, uh, should probably head out to grab our food. Do you need anything else?” I take another long sip of my drink.

“Maybe some air conditioning?” I joke.

“Yeah, this is rough. If you need to, you can come stay at my place tonight. I'll sleep on the couch."

“Oh, thanks. But, Lio said I could go to his place.”

“Oh perfect. That’s closer for class tomorrow.”

“Mhm.” I nod as he puts his shoes back on by the door.

“I’ll be back.” He steps out of the apartment.

The door clicks softly shut behind him. I tap my phone screen to check the time, seeing the lock screen of Luca and I laughing into our kiss this past summer. I miss him so much my chest feels like it cracks open down my sternum.

6 more days… then I’ll be in his arms again.

#Liv X Luca

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shera-dnd · 2 years ago

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DID SOMEONE ASK FOR FLUFFY DOMESTIC FALLEN PETALS?

Well, y'all did it's why I wrote it in the first place

This one is set like at least a full decade past whatever the show's finale is gonna be, featuring Cinder and Ruby moving in together in Mistral so Cinder can try to reconnect to her old homeland

It doesn't go particularly well for her

But it least it was fun to write for me

If anyone were to ask a young Ruby Rose where she’d settle down in her later years, her first answer would have been that she’d never settle down, because that’s lame .

But if one managed to get her to say an actual place, then a small village on the outskirts of Mistral would not have been her first choice.

Honestly it wouldn’t have even been her last choice.

Back then Ruby had no reason to consider this place for her new home, but back then she and Cinder had also been sworn enemies.

So maybe young Ruby had no way of guessing what direction her life would take.

Dropped a city out of the sky, fell into another world, had a little chat with the Gods, married her nemesis…

Yeah there was no way she could guess any of that.

So here she was, in this small mistrali village, having finally settled the last of her belongings.

It wasn’t anywhere near as big as the home she left in Patch, but it was still cozy in a way and it fit most of their furniture. It wasn’t a home quite yet, but she could see herself making it one.

Not today though.

Today Ruby was exhausted and she needed a nice long break.

Cinder stretched next to her, rolling her left shoulder as she adjusted her prosthetic.

“How are you feeling, honey?” Ruby asked her wife.

“ Sore ,” was her blunt answer, “and in need of a long soak.”

“Well, good thing we already got the hot water running,” Ruby commented, walking up to her.

As soon as they got close enough Cinder’s hand reached for Ruby’s almost instinctively.

“But I meant more about, you know, being here,” she added.

Cinder sighed, “I’m… not sure. I know Mistral is my home, but after all this time… it’s hard not to feel like an outsider.”

“We knew this was gonna be awkward to start with, but we’ll make this work.” Ruby gave her hand a little squeeze and leaned against her shoulder, “now how about you go take that bath, and then tomorrow we can meet the neighbors and see if we can get you reconnecting to your old roots.”

“Yeah… I can do that,” Cinder nodded, letting go of Ruby’s hand and walking up to their new bathroom, before pausing. “You coming?”

Ruby chuckled, “tempting, but I think if we both try to fit inside that bathtub, we’re just gonna come out more sore than when we went in.”

“I guess we already know what we’re renovating,” Cinder joked.

With that she made her way into the bathroom and left Ruby alone in the room.

She had to admit, she was exhausted after a whole day of moving boxes. The thought of doing anything besides taking a quick shower, and falling face first onto her pillow, felt like hell to her now.

So she tried not to curse out loud when she heard a knock at her door.

Come on, Rose, you tracked through half of Anima on foot at age 17.

What’s just a little chat with the neighbors?

Though she wasn’t seventeen anymore, and after all she put herself through, she could definitely feel her age catching up to her.

Damn it, is this how Miss Calavera felt?

Okay, time to stop that train of thought before she went into a midlife crisis.

Ruby made her way to the door, and readied her most polite smile before opening up.

She was greeted by the sight of an older woman - closer to Cinder’s age - with long brown hair tied up in a bun, and beautiful gray eyes.

Ruby thought she caught a glimpse of a scar around her neck, but averted her eyes so as to not make her uncomfortable.

“Hey there, neighbor,” she greeted, “I saw you were moving in today, so I wanted to bring you something.”

The woman handed Ruby a basket with a little cloth laid over it.

Ruby took it and removed the cloth, revealing a pile of still steaming gyozas.

“I know the last thing I’d wanna do after a long move is to have to stop and cook for myself, so I thought I’d save you the trouble.”

Gods, Ruby hadn’t even thought about making dinner.

This woman was a saint.

Actually, that gave Ruby an idea.

“Thank you, that’s very thoughtful of you,” she answered, stepping aside, “please, come in. We were just done setting everything up anyways.”

The woman took her invitation, Ruby leading her to the kitchen so she could set aside the gyozas as a little surprise for Cinder.

“We?” the woman repeated, “are you moving in with family?”

Ruby smiled at that.

Yeah, Cinder really was her family now.

“Just me and my wife,” Ruby answered, “she’s Mistrali, but hasn’t actually lived in Anima since she was ten, so we thought it would be nice to bring her back home. Get in touch with her roots and all that.”

“That sounds wonderful. I’d love to show you both the town if you’d like,” the woman beamed with a genuine excitement that reminded Ruby of herself. Then she seemed to catch herself, “oh, where are my manners? I’m Royuka Sakurasou. It's a pleasure to meet you.”

“I’m Ruby Rose. Pleasure to meet you too,” Ruby replied, offering her hand, adding, “looks like we’re both named after flowers.”

Ryouka took her hand and gave it a firm shake, joking, “I think that’s a sign we’re meant to get along.”

The two of them chatted away with surprising ease.

It was easy to forget Ruby was an introvert sometimes, and that all her relationships - as strong as they were - never came without some initial struggle.

But Miss Sakurasou seemed like a genuine kindred spirit, someone who understood Ruby on some level.

It seemed like Ruby could check “befriending the neighbors” off of her to-do list.

That is until they heard the bathroom door creek open, and Cinder stepped out looking properly refreshed.

“Hey, honey,” she called, making her way into the kitchen, “I left the bathroom nice and warm for yo–”

Then her eye met Royuka’s, and her jaw dropped .

“I…”

“You…” Royuka muttered, stumbling back and bracing against the kitchen counter.

“I uh… take it you two have met each other before,” Ruby commented, quickly stepping between them.

“You tried to kill me!” Royuka accused, “and you stole my clothes!”

Ruby turned to Cinder with a questioning look, only for her to flinch and force a smile that did nothing to make her look any less guilty.

“If it makes you feel better, I was only trying to knock you out,” was the best Cinder could manage.

Ruby mentally unchecked “befriending the neighbors” from her to-do list.

This was… gonna be a lot harder than she was expecting.

#rwby #fanfic #fallen petals #ruby rose #cinder fall

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dear-wormwoods · 2 years ago

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For the past few years I’ve been making posts on New Year’s Eve about my life, so… gotta keep the tradition alive I guess!

Some things I accomplished this year:

Another year of maintaining my Duolingo streak. I’m still not confident in speaking Spanish but I feel like I’m making progress understanding it.

Paid off all of my credit card debt. I’m very proud of this one because I’ve been in debt since I turned 18 and got my first credit card, and I thought it was just a fact of life, but it didn’t have to be!

Saved up $10k for… idk, part of a down payment, day care costs for whenever I finally decide to have a kid, whatever! The world is my oyster.

Developed a healthier relationship with food. My weight loss goals ultimately didn’t pan out, I only lost 20lbs and gained some of that back over the holiday months, but I feel good about my mental progress.

Started exercising more. I joined the local Y and attended a variety of classes that I really enjoy going to, and I walked outside a lot when the weather was nice. I even hiked a couple of times! Which was a big deal for me considering how out of shape I was and how little confidence I had in myself.

Highlights of the year:

Going to Colorado!!! Absolutely my favorite thing about 2022 was the South Park 25th Anniversary Concert and the whole trip surrounding that, from visiting Fairplay, to eating fancy food at Wolf’s Tailor in Denver, to hiking up to Hanging Lake. Even standing in the merch line in the blazing hot sun for hours at Red Rocks had its moments. I definitely want to go back after Casa Bonita reopens in May.

Reconnecting with a friend who ended up becoming one of the people I spent the most time with in the back half of 2022. Going walking together and doing Y classes, having House of the Dragon watch parties, dinners and drinks… it’s just been really great having her around this year!

Hiking a full mountain to see the foliage. It was a small mountain in the grand scheme of things, but I still felt accomplished!

Just generally going out and doing things more, socializing and being active and not worrying so much about money. It put a dent into how much I’ve been able to save but you know what?? Worth it.

In general this year was a good one. I’m still miserable working at my waitressing job, but it’s necessary to be able to save money. Work in my career is going well, though - I feel like I connect with the kids even though I’m constantly worrying I’m not doing enough there. My mental health has been pretty stable, some hiccups here and there but nothing drastic. And my cats are doing great, thankfully! I even went on a date to end the year and I’m seeing her again tomorrow!

Goals for 2023:

Another year of Duolingo.

Save another $10k.

Get in better shape before summer so I can do more difficult hikes.

Lose weight… I should stop putting this as a goal but it’s tradition at this point.