#dare i say i ended up writing nothing TT

[tiramisuucakeee]

A VERY BAD REP, AND EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN ★

( 420! reader x playboy! heeseung )

IN WHICH : at an exclusive private school in the city, where rich kids thought they ruled the place, heeseung finds out the girl who cheated off of him on an exam and could probably get him expelled, has an even worse reputation than him, and she doesn’t seem to care about what he thinks or says.

WARNINGS: drugs, sexual content. +18.

BTW: tried my best to represent my king fanon suna rintaro in y/n. i haven’t smoked in so long….. it’s been 30 years (2 weeks)….. i’m starting to forget the feeling (girl got sober) ….. ok so basically i dramatized everything cause it’s a fanfic okay, don’t think i take all the stuff i wrote pls and ew i wil never ever write smth like this again, i’m a fluff writer TT

WC: i aint counting allat

read more !

they say opposites attract, even in love, and for him, it’s always been true. he’s into quiet, delicate girls, the type who never speak up and just go with the flow. but no matter how sweet they are, heeseung drops them without a second thought, like they’re nothing more than a momentary distraction after getting what he wants from them. so how did he end up in a situation where it was him doing the chasing? he never really thought he'd have to, ever.

it was almost funny, laughable even. he, of all people, accused of copying on an exam? and now facing the possibility of being expelled if he didn’t find a way to make it right? it was the kind of mess he never imagined getting into.

yes, he was a player and toyed with girls’ feelings for his own benefit, but that was it, he would never dare to stain his behavior record and affect his reputation with the school. he knew his family would kill him if he did, they were the type to always put on a face for others and everyone thought they were this perfect little rich family of three, that went on the most expensive trips and could buy anyone and anything.

he could still remember the teacher’s harsh words blaming him for this. ‘miss y/n has an impeccable record of approved grades in my subject, while you, mister heeseung, barely scrape by. and in this exam, it’s your first grade above a 90. you both share the same exact answers, the same solutions. that leaves me to think you copied off her. i suggest you stop denying it and accept the punishment of suspension. if not, i’ll have no choice but to speak to the principal about expelling you from this school. and your father won’t be able to save you from this one again with donations.’

heeseung slammed his locker shut with a fury, the sound echoing down the empty hallway as the final bell rang. his mind raced, thoughts spiraling. what was he going to tell his family if he actually got expelled? his family reputation couldn’t fix this. the idea was unthinkable, impossible. he wasn’t about to let something he didn’t do ruin everything. he wouldn’t accept it. not without a fight.

he’d stolen the cheat sheet, that much was true. but copying off another student? he would never do that. he had his pride, after all. the problem was, he had no idea how you’d ended up with that paper. how did you get your hands on it? and why the hell had you not even thought about changing one single answer to be slick? his mind was racing, but he wasn’t about to let anyone think he was that stupid.

heeseung had never even bothered to look your way since you got to the school a year and a half ago in your leather jacket and sunglasses. your parents knew each other but you weren’t the type of person he’d ever hang out with. he did know about a guy having a fling with you, and honestly, it almost drove him insane. word has gotten out you had almost driven him to the point of seeking professional help to be sane. but that wasn’t even the worst thing said about you. even with your father’s reputation and money, you weren’t safe from being on people’s mouths as the daughter he never wanted.

what made everything even more difficult was that he had no idea how to make you admit it was you. he didn’t have your number, didn’t know anything about your schedule except for the one class you both shared. confronting you in person seemed like a disaster waiting to happen. he couldn’t risk you turning the whole thing around, making him look like the bad guy while you played the victim. it would be just his luck.

he had never felt so completely taken advantage of. it was always him who used people, who knew how to manipulate them into giving him exactly what he wanted. yet here he was, losing his mind over a girl he’d never even spoken to. it was ridiculous, and it pissed him off.

as the next day rolled around, he was still consumed by it. before the first period, he stood by the stone lion statue on the entrance of school, leaning against the wall next to jake and sunghoon, waiting for karina and wonyoung, as they mindlessly talked about a new prada backpack sunghoon bought yesterday. but heeseung’s mind kept drifting back to the mess with you, he tried to push it aside, focusing on the usual routine. still, the more he tried to forget, the more it nagged at him.

just as he was about to ask jake about you, since he always seemed to know everything about everyone, he stopped himself. no way was he going to ask his friend for help and look uncapable of solving things. he needed to figure this out on his own. instead, he turned his thoughts to how he could find you before the shared calculus class at the end of the day. he had to get to the bottom of this, and fast.

"heeseung!" a cheery voice called out, pulling him from his thoughts. he looked up to see karina dragging wonyoung along, both of them heading toward him, their little red-bottom heels clicking against the pavement. karina flashed him a big, playful smile and waved enthusiastically, her energy cutting through the tension that had been building all morning.

“damn it, it’s too early in the morning for this,” heeseung muttered, rolling his eyes as they approached. jake, who had been watching the whole scene with a smirk, nudged him in the ribs. “that girlfriend of yours, man,” he teased. heeseung just shot him a glare, clearly not amused.

the two girls made their way toward them, but just as they were about to reach the group, a loud, roaring engine cut through the morning air. before anyone could react, a sleek motorcycle zoomed in, blocking their path. the rider revved the engine once more, making it clear they weren’t going anywhere until they dealt with them.

"woah, what’s goin on?" sunghoon asked, clearly impressed by the person who had the guts to stop karina and wonyoung in their tracks. he wasn’t the only one taken aback. everyone was staring as the motorcycle came to a halt. little did they know, the rider was someone heeseung had been obsessing over all morning, someone who could probably ruin both karina and wonyoung’s face with just one single punch. the tension in the air shifted instantly, and heeseung felt his heart race, but not for his girlfriend’s safety, instead, for the person who rolled around.

the motorcycle she was riding was imposing, big, dark, and matte, with electric blue accents. the kind of bike that screamed power and danger. it looked like something straight out of a movie, designed to intimidate, just like its rider. there was a certain energy about her, something that made everyone around tense up instinctively. she didn’t need to say a word to command attention. her presence alone was enough to make even the most confident shrink back.

but they still stepped closer, followed by a crowd of other students who knew exactly who was under the helmet. everyone was eager to see what would happen next.

you pulled off the black helmet, letting your hair tumble out as the cold morning air hit your face, sharpening the already obvious irritation in your expression. there was an undeniable edge to your aura, something fierce and untouchable, like you thrived on chaos and didn’t care who knew it. the way you stood, calm but dangerous, with an almost predatory confidence, made it clear you weren’t here to play nice. karina glanced around, clearly uncomfortable in the middle of a confrontation she’d rather avoid, but she couldn’t deny what she had just done, not going unnoticed by you.

not letting her get the first word, you swung off your motorcycle, your movements sharp and deliberate. "you bitch, are you insane?" you shot at her, pointing a finger directly in her face. the students around you quickly scrambled, eager to capture what might turn into a full-blown fight. for the students watching, it was like something straight out of a teen movie. the popular ‘it girl’ of the school facing off against the infamous ‘bad girl’. a label you despised even more than the people who threw it around. the rich kids were convinced you were a bad person just because you got high 8 out of the 7 days of the week, dressed in black and liked to waste your money getting inked.

"what are you talking about?!" karina stammered, stumbling back as she grabbed wonyoung’s hand, who seemed ready to shrink behind her in panic. they both looked like dolls, dressed in couture clothing and expensive hair accessories.

you scoffed, the memory of what happened earlier still fresh. "don't play dumb with me," you shot back, eyes narrowing. "you're the one who threw food on the road to school from your little convertible. god, are you even intelligent enough to drive?!” karina’s face flushed with embarrassment, not thinking you would actually confront her like this, and for a moment, she looked like she might deny it. but instead, she opened her mouth. "well, i guess i should have thrown it at you then, instead of the road, since you always like to be dirty, don’t you?” she laughed, looking down at your worn out shoes, which were sluthered with mud.

"dirty?" you cut her off with a bitter laugh. "you want to talk about dirty?" your voice dripped with sarcasm. "i’m not the one with half of the school’s dicks down my throat, while embarrassing myself chasing a guy who, the only thing he likes about me is fucking, because it’s the only time i will stop being annoying, how ‘bout that?”

“well, it’s a shame that you don’t have a face pretty enough to even attract a normal guy’s attention. i have seen you hanging around with those shaggy and dirty stoner animals from your old school you call men, having sex in the middle of an alley, all high and out of their minds, huh,” she insisted, pointing at you up and down.

“you’re so full of shit karina, and it’s sad. as if you’d ever find someone that actually likes you, to listen to you talk for more than ten minutes.” you threw her a pitiful look. the students around you shifted uncomfortably, some of them glancing at each other as the tension in the air grew thicker. wonyoung, still holding onto karina’s hand, looked like she was about to step in, but karina pulled her back. “i don’t care what you think, i’m rich, i’ve got tons of friends and i’m pretty, and you have always been jealous of me, just what is your problem?”

you stepped closer, your gaze never leaving hers. “like i care about your dad’s money wash karina, don’t get too carried away, it takes more than money to make someone feel less than you,” you smirked, looking at her up and down. you stepped dangerously closer quickly, making her stumble back once again and shriek, gripping onto wonyoung’s arm even stronger.

“but it will pay your facial reconstruction bill if you keep fucking with me, got it?” you said quietly, but with a force that made the words hit harder than anything else. before she could snap back, wonyoung pulled at her sleeve, whispering something in her ear. karina hesitated, then exhaled a long breath. she wasn’t stupid, karina has seen what ‘kinds of people’ you hang out with, and how bad the other person gets out of a fight with you, she was always quick to insult you, but never to continue fully.

"okay, fine. you want to clean your little tricycle?" karina said, trying to act nonchalant, taking out a huge bill from her purse. "here, i don’t care, just go back to where you came from." you took the bill karina handed out harshly, splitting it in right in the middle, making her gasp, and look at the money falling on the ground, feeling totally humiliated.

not saying anything else, you turned back and mounted the motorcycle again, revving it in a way for the students around to step back, and open way for you to continue your morning, not daring to get in your way. you sped off, the roar of your bike fading into the distance of the parking lot. the boys lingered for a moment before finally making their way over to karina and wonyoung, concern written all over their faces. "you girls alright?" sunghoon asked, glancing at both of them.

karina shot him a frustrated look, her arms still crossed defensively. "yeah, whatever. i'm fine," she muttered, though her voice was tight. wonyoung stayed quiet, looking more shaken than usual, as if still processing the encounter.

the boys exchanged a few more words of reassurance, but heeseung barely heard them. his mind was miles away, consumed by the memory of you. your sharp words, your defiant stance, the way you’d made it clear you weren’t to be messed with. he couldn’t shake the image of you. he couldn’t let it go. not now. heeseung was used to being in control, used to getting what he wanted without a second thought. but you, you were different. there was something about you that made him want to find out more, something about the way you handled the whole situation that had him itching to confront you, face-to-face, but he knew he couldn’t, not unless he wanted to hear karina yell at him nonstop in a fit of jealousy.

"you good, man?" jake's voice broke through his thoughts, and heeseung looked up, blinking. "yeah," he said, trying to shake off the feeling. but deep down, he knew he wasn’t really fine.

as the day went on and classes shifted, lunch break came to an end, and before long, it was time for the dreaded calculus class. you sauntered to your seat at the back of the classroom, right by the window, and dropped into the chair. with a bored sigh, you pulled out your phone, scrolling through it without a care, eyes barely glancing up. it was weird seeing you stick around this long on a school day. usually, you’d slip out early or roll in late, and no one ever said a word. you never had too many absences, always acing every exam. and for that reason, the teachers didn’t question it, because you had this way of making it look effortless, like the rules didn’t even apply to you.

as the class dragged on, something landed softly on your desk, just a small note. you glanced over and saw the girl next to you, the one with the big round glasses, her eyes wide with nervous energy. the second you looked her way, she flinched, shrinking back into her seat. she quickly pointed to the guy sitting next to her, her face practically pleading for you to read whatever nonsense he’d scribbled.

you gave him a weird look, your brow raised in silent confusion, before you slowly unfolded the note, your fingers moving deliberately as if you had all the time in the world. it read, ‘what do you think you’re doing? why did you copy off of me on the exam?’

you snorted at the message, and instantly, the memory hit you. it was the first time you’d let yourself go, forgetting about grades, staying way too long at some random house drugging yourself with something new, until blackout, two days away from home in your ride. you hadn’t made it back in time to study, so you did what you had to do. you texted a contact at school to get you the test. lucky for you, he knew someone in your class who had managed to steal the cheat sheet, and just like that, you had it in your hands.

‘none of your business’ you wrote back, your fingers moving quickly as you folded the note and slid it over to the girl. she hesitated for a second, then took it from you, passing it to him discreetly like it was some kind of underground deal.

a few moments later, the note came back to you. you unfolded it, and your eyes scanned the words. ‘you have to admit you cheated off of me, i’m risking expulsion.’ as if you actually gave a damn about his risk. you shot him a cold glance, then made a subtle motion with your hand, signaling for him to follow you out of the classroom, while you carried your belongings, not planning on returning.

after a few seconds, he finally slipped out of the classroom, meeting you in the empty hallway. "hey, so i really need you to admit you cheated off of me, i could get suspended, even expelled, and i'm not willing to take that kind of punishment for you," he started, his voice full of desperation. but you didn’t let him finish. you raised a hand, cutting him off, and his words trailed off as he stood there, waiting for you to say something.

"i’m sorry, who even are you?" you asked, shaking your head, genuinely confused. "i’m still trying to figure out why you think i’d ever admit to cheating on a test for you." your voice was casual, like the whole situation didn’t even faze you.

"because you did," he said, his tone dripping with self-righteousness. "it’s the right thing to do. you need to get suspended for cheating off of me." he smirked, as if he was the one holding all the power now. "and if you don’t, i’ll just tell them i caught you fucking someone in the bathroom for the test answers or something. you wouldn’t want that, would you?" that made you laugh.

"okay, listen, mr. whoever-you-are," you said, raising an eyebrow, "i’m not doing shit for you. after all, it’s my word against yours, which i’m guessing doesn’t mean much, considering you're the one getting blamed for cheating." you leaned in, a smirk playing at your lips. "and as for the fucking thing? i’ve been caught plenty before. the worst they’ll do is throw me in detention. so go ahead, do as you please." you poked his shoulder, the gesture almost mocking. he stood there for a second, his smile fading as he processed what you'd said. you could tell he wasn't used to being called out like that, or having the cards reversed, but then he leaned in, his voice lowering, like he was trying to pull some kind of play.

"you know," he said, his tone smooth, "a pretty girl like you... you don't really want to be known as the one who got away with cheating. people would start talking, saying you’re not enough for a school like this, wouldn't they?" he stepped closer, his eyes scanning you like he was sizing you up, "but hey, i get it. you don't want to get caught up in more drama. maybe i can help with that... if you just admit it was you."

this couldn’t be happening, you just wondered how in the world did this guy not know of your reputation, he was embarrassing himself so much at the moment. no boys in school got near you for that exact same reason, and here he was, thinking he could word his way into manipulating you, as if you didn’t know how to play your own game. you were known for being this maniatic crazy bitch with a motorcycle, who hang out with ‘lowlifes’, knew how to fight and that was only useful to get drugs from, also probably slept around with teachers because they didn’t think you’re smart enough to study. you’ve been told so many things, that what he said didn’t even bother you.

you rolled your eyes, clearly unimpressed. "oh, so now you're trying to play the good guy card?" you laughed dryly, leaning against the lockers. "nice try, but i'm not some stupid girl you can sweet-talk into doing something."

he chuckled, clearly not giving up. "come on, baby," he said, his voice turning smooth and almost coaxing, "we both know you like the thrill of a little risk. how about we make a nice deal, you admit it was you, and maybe we... hang out sometime. you know, just us. could be fun."

you raised an eyebrow, rolling your eyes again. "wow, really? you are so considerate of me, but no, i don’t want your reduce reuse recycled dick, i'm not interested."

he stepped closer again, trying to intimidate you, but you weren't moved. you just pushed him back with a lazy finger, eyes never leaving his. "you clearly don’t know what you’re doing, or even how to talk to me," you said, voice dripping with mockery. "i'm not impressed. i’ve seen your type a hundred times. and it's honestly fucking pathetic."

he frowned, his jaw tightening, but you didn't care. you weren't here for his tantrums. "seriously, you think this is gonna work on me?" you continued, your voice low and sharp. "you're the one who's gonna look stupid if you keep pushing this. i'm not gonna admit. and if you keep threatening me, we can always settle this another way, i’m sure you know how to fight with those big boy muscles right?" you squeezed his arm, making heeseung shudder, almost feeling a tingle.

you turned to leave, tossing him a final glance over your shoulder. "good luck, though," you added, your voice flat. "i'm sure your suspension month will be really fun." you tossed over your shoulder, voice dripping with sarcasm. "but don't worry, you probably already have a few girls your way to help you feel validated and accompanied."

heeseung just stood there, watching you leave and soon disappear onto another hallway, probably escaping classes. but that did not worry him, we couldn’t let himself worry over a girl like you. you would clearly never fall for his words. guys like heeseung, we’re almost like easy prey for you. too weak and easy, thinking they dominated the whole world, fucking around with girls, throwing massive parties and golfing every sunday with their dad. when in reality they probably didn’t know how to unclog a toilet.

they pissed you off so much, he pissed you off, and now your day was ruined. so almost two hours later, you found yourself on a complete different town to the south, entering an worn out house, kicking the door open. the house brought back many memories, too many. from when you lived here, and not back with your father, in a place you didn’t belong.

"who's here?" a slurred voice called from the kitchen, barely cutting through the thumping music. the place reeked of stale smoke and something sharper, like bleach or chemicals. dim, flickering lights barely illuminated the clutter, casting long shadows over cracked furniture and empty beer cans. scattered on the floor were people, sprawled in various stages of oblivion, some twitching, others motionless, all trapped in their own haze. the walls, stained and peeling, seemed to pulse with the low vibrations of the bass, as if the house itself was barely holding it all together. the house which was previously your mother’s, was now just a usual abandoned place that your friends utilized to hang out in.

"damn, this place is a mess. why didn't you wait for me?" you muttered, stepping into the kitchen. your friends were slouched around a grimy breakfast table, barely looking up as one of them finished snorting white lines off the edge. the counter was littered with crumpled pink blunt wrappers.

"yo! gigi, stop the music!" yeonjun shouted, sniffling as he shot up from his seat, stumbling a bit before he lurched forward to hug you. he almost tripped over his own mismatched-socks covered feet, but when he finally reached you, he inhaled deeply, as if your scent, clean and free of any substances, was a breath of fresh air in the chaos of the room. his grip tightened for a moment, his eyes flickering with a mix of relief.

"i’m not your bitch," giselle muttered, rolling her red-ish eyes as she leaned over to turn down the blaring music. her long acrylic nails clicked sharply against the plastic radio, the sound cutting through the tension in the room. she barely looked at yeonjun as she did it, her expression more annoyed than anything else.

you laughed at her comment, shaking your head, and then moved to hug her, pushing yeonjun off you in the process. he stumbled back, slightly irritated but too dazed to really react, while giselle’s stiff posture softened just a little as you wrapped your arms around her. her eyes flickered with something close to annoyance, but there was a hint of a smirk tugging at the corner of her lips. you pulled away from giselle, giving her a teasing look. "so, what's the plan for tonight?" you asked, shifting your attention to the other strangers in the room, as they lazily got back to their own little worlds. yeonjun was still rubbing his nose, barely paying attention, while giselle just shrugged, taking a drag from her cigarette before flicking it into an ashtray.

“we’re hitting that party in the hill later,” she said, her voice flat but laced with anticipation. "gonna get crossfaded, maybe do a little more. jay’s been asking about you non-stop, by the way." she giggled. you raised an eyebrow at that, crossing your arms. "jay?" you repeated, a little surprised. you didn't think he’d be the type to obsess over anything, let alone you. "what does he want with me?"

she leaned back in her chair, a mischievous glint in her eye. "he’s obsessed you and your dumb tattoos. that night you two spent together? yeah, he can’t stop talking about it.” she paused, letting the words hang in the air like a secret. “guess he’s got a thing for you.”

you snorted, leaning against the counter, trying not to let it bother you too much. it was funny, people you’ve slept with always seemed to fixate on your exterior. but jay? he was a different story. you didn’t really care about whatever weird little crush he might have, though. he was now from a different crowd, and would never cross that line to be with you.

“he does know i changed schools right?” you said. your new school was a whole different world, elite, private, a playground for the wealthy and connected. kids with silver spoons, flashy cars, and tailored suits. a lot of them were insufferable, like karina, but you didn’t mind. it was easy to stand out, to be yourself in a place where most people just followed the rules. since your mother disappeared and your dad took you back, you’ve been placed in a world you don’t belong, and clearly don’t mind not belonging.

they had their porsche, you had your r7. they had private security, and you had your little hello kitty knife. but here, with giselle and the others? it was different. a lot more laid-back, the students knew how to have fun without all the airs and graces of your new world. they were down to earth, fun, and honest, none of the pretentious bullshit that came with being surrounded by rich kids. they had their flaws, sure, but you loved hanging out with them. it was like coming back home after a long trip to a hotel casino, where everyone was more concerned with status than actually living.

giselle noticed the shift in your mood and grinned, as if reading your thoughts. "i know, i know," she said, her voice softened, almost sympathetic. "but, hey, you're still cool with us. we don’t care about your new rich kid school. we’re just down for a good time."

"yeah, alright. i’m down. just don’t expect me to get too crazy, my dad’s expecting me before five am, he knows how shit goes here,” you let out a quiet sigh, glancing over at yeonjun who was now half-focused on his phone, tapping away furiously with his thumb. "so, i’m guessing you’ve already got the stuff lined up for tonight?" you asked, a smirk tugging at your lips.

he looked up at you, still slightly dazed, and nodded. "yeah, i texted my guy next door. he’s got everything we need. should be ready by the time we leave."

“don’t worry, i’ll go,” you didn’t need to ask twice. despite your better judgment, you were already used to this kind of thing. you pushed off the counter, giving giselle a nod. "i’ll be back in a minute, you both stop inhaling shit and try to sober up, i’m not a babysitter," you said casually, already walking toward the door.

"take your time, don't get too caught tho," she called after you, voice almost playful, but with that edge of concern. the door slammed shut behind you, and you stepped out into the cold evening air. it wasn’t far, the dealer’s place was literally next door, tucked behind a run-down convenience store that no one seemed to go into.

the door to the small house was already cracked open when you arrived. you knocked lightly, stepping back to make sure no one would spot you. a moment later, a guy with messy hair and a hoodie poked his head out, his eyes scanning you quickly before he motioned for you to come in. "yo, what’s up?" he greeted, his tone laid-back but sharp, like he had done this a thousand times before

“yeonjun sent me," you said, slipping inside. you didn’t need to say much, his face lit up as soon as you mentioned the name. yeonjun was a regular here, always popping in for one thing or another. the guy didn’t ask too many questions, which was fine by you. "right, right," he said, disappearing into a cluttered room at the back. you heard the rustle of plastic, the clink of glass. he returned with some small bags of pills in his hand, sliding them across the counter. "this should be good for the night. tell yeonjun he owes me. i threw a little present in there for you, pretty."

you nodded with a smile, taking the bag, your fingers brushing against the cool plastic. it was always the same, but you still hated the feeling of this whole transaction, sketchy, rushed. "thanks," you muttered, seeing a little extra, and slipping the bags into your jacket pocket before heading back toward the door.

"catch you later," he called after you, and you didn’t bother to respond.

as you headed back toward the house, the night started to feel more like a blur of its own, the sun setting into a canvas of dark and light colors.

when you pushed the door open again, giselle was already eyeing you, her arms crossed and a smirk playing on her lips. "got it?" she asked, and you gave a quick nod. "yeah, we’re good to go," you said, tossing the bags onto the table where yeonjun had plopped back down. he gave you a lazy thumbs up.

the party was exactly what you’d expect from a house like this, small, run-down, but buzzing with an energy that could only come from a group of teenagers living for the night. the kind of place where people got high, drunk, and fucked without any care in the world. the walls were covered in posters and graffiti, the floors littered with empty bottles and crumpled cans. music thudded through cheap speakers, competing with the chaotic chatter and the occasional shout of someone daring someone else to do something ridiculous or threatening to start a fight.

when you, yeonjun, and giselle arrived, the front door was wide open. keeho was standing there, practically bouncing with excitement, already tipsy from whatever he’d been drinking. his hair was an absolute mess, eyes slanted and tired-looking, and he had lipstick stains all over his neck, but his grin was infectious as he waved you over.

“yo, rich girl! you made it!” he exclaimed, his voice a little slurred, and he pulled you all in for a quick, sloppy hug. "was starting to think you forgot about me, we gotta get you three started!" without missing a beat, keeho grabbed a half-empty bottle of cheap vodka from the floor and shoved it into your hands, urging you to take a swing. his laugh was loud and carefree, and it felt like you were already swept into the madness. you hesitated for a second, but then shrugged and tipped the bottle back. the burn of the alcohol hit the back of your throat, sharp and bitter, but it didn’t matter.

giselle grinned and knocked back her own drink, wiping her mouth as she handed the bottle to yeonjun, who eagerly took a swig, his eyes already glazed over. keeho’s grin only widened, as if he had orchestrated some kind of victory. “hell yeah, let’s go!”

you all pushed past him into the house, the noise of the party almost overwhelming at first. in the main room, there were already people sprawled on couches, a couple of them making out in the corner, while others lounged around in various states of intoxication. the air was thick with the scent of weed and sex. “okay, so, knowing you yeonjun, hotboxing only in the basement bathroom, i don’t want to repeat what happened last month in my room,” keeho turned to your group with a serious face all of a sudden. yeonjun rolled his eyes and started arguing, and giselle joined in, making you leave the scene relentlessly.

as you wandered further into the house, you spotted jay almost immediately. he was leaning against the wall, a drink in his hand, his eyes scanning the room until they landed on you. the second he saw you, his entire demeanor changed, his gaze locked onto you with a sharp intensity, like you were the only person in the room. you couldn’t help but notice it. there was something almost obsessive in the way he watched you, his lips curling into a small but knowing smile. you weren’t sure if he was just drunk or if it was something more, but you knew he wasn’t just here for a good time. he was here for you.

“hey,” jay said as you approached, his voice low and a little too eager, like he was trying to hide just how much he wanted to pull you into his orbit. “glad you showed up. i wasn’t sure if you would.”

you raised an eyebrow and took the drink from him, taking a sip, already sensing the weird energy from him. "you act like i'm some kind of mystery," you said, your tone light, but there was a hint of warning in your voice.

jay just laughed, though it sounded a little nervous. he shifted, trying to get closer, but you didn’t exactly encourage it. "no, no. i mean, i was hoping you’d show up," he said, clearly not even noticing how desperate he sounded. "i don’t know. i just... i couldn’t stop thinking about you." his words hung there in the air for a moment, too heavy for what was supposed to be a casual conversation. you glanced away, trying to shake the awkwardness of it. he was just supposed to be a random hook up, and now he was obsessed.

"yeah, i’m too sober for this, i need a minute," you cut him off, shrugging his hand away, your tone sharper than you intended. the last thing you wanted right now was another round of jay following you around again. you managed to slip into the bathroom, the noise of the party muffled behind you. the moment the door clicked shut, you let out a sigh of relief, leaning back against the door for a second, trying to shake off the weight of jay’s attention.

reaching into your pocket, you pulled out your phone, hoping for a distraction. you had been waiting on a text from your motorcycle repair center all night, hoping they'd finally gotten back to you about the part you needed. just as you started scrolling through your messages, trying to ignore the distant thumping of bass and the muffled laughter from outside, you heard the bathroom door creak open behind you. before you could even turn around, you felt a hard bump against your shoulder, someone colliding with you unexpectedly.

"hey!" the voice was sharp, and the tone was ready to unleash a curse. but then, the voice shifted, a more amused, almost playful note creeping in. "wait, hold up, you're cute."

you blinked, turning to face the girl who had crashed into you. she was standing there, eyes still wide with what could’ve been irritation, but her lips were curled into a smirk now. she looked like she was about to say something more, but the words faltered when she took another quick look at you. she was a couple of inches shorter than you, her dark hair pulled into a messy ponytail, with eyeliner that looked like it had been hastily done, smudging a little at the edges. she wore a worn-out band tee, black jeans, and had that 'i don’t care' attitude.

you raised an eyebrow, still holding your phone, but not making any immediate movement. "thanks," you said dryly, not sure if she was being sarcastic or genuine. “ryujin,” she continued, “and you are?”

“y/n, y/n l/n,” you introduced yourself, almost sounding too righteous.

“you good y/n?” she asked, her voice almost too soft, the kind of softness that could break you without a word. “fuck no, i lost my friends and i need to get high right now,” you laughed, running your hand through your hair.

“oh really?” before you could respond, ryujin was already in front of you, close enough that you could smell the alcohol on her breath, feel the heat radiating off her body. “i can help with that,” she whispered, and there was something about the way she said it that made your pulse spike. she was clearly offering something more than simple. she was offering you something you hadn’t tried before.

she reached into her pocket, pulling out something small, a needle. you froze, your chest tightening, but the pull was still there. you weren’t thinking. you were just so desperate, it would happen again, you would take something from a random hot person. the needle gleamed in her hand, sharp and cold under the dim lighting. you didn’t need to ask what it was, she didn’t need to explain. you could already feel it, the ache of wanting something to take you somewhere else, to make this noise in your head stop. you were sick of it.

her eyes flicked to yours, dark and knowing, like she could see straight through you. "you sure?" she asked, but there was no question in her voice. it was more like a dare. your breath hitched, your heartbeat louder than the music. you looked at her, and for a split second, everything felt still. her eyes held you captive, like she was waiting for you to decide whether to break or not. and then, without saying anything, you nodded.

she didn’t hesitate. one swift motion, and the needle was at your arm. the sting was sharp, more real than anything you’d felt. the rush of it hit you instantly. a sudden heat spread through your veins, like fire lacing under your skin. the world around you blurred, the noise fading into the background. you felt something.

it was almost too much to handle, too quick. your body jolted with the rush of it, the sense of floating, of being untethered from everything. and then, before you could even catch your breath, ryujin was kissing you. it was hard, messy, raw. her lips were insistent, pulling you deeper into the chaos, as if she was swallowing every ounce of your pain. it wasn’t gentle, it was desperate. like she wanted to take everything from you and leave you empty, but at the same time, filled.

you kissed her back, caught in the haze, your body responding before your mind could catch up. the high was creeping in fast, too fast, but it felt good. it felt like everything was finally softening, the noise, the pressure, the expectations, all of it was dissolving with every second that passed.

when she finally pulled back, you were breathless. the world was spinning, but in a way that felt almost right, like you weren’t out of control, but floating in some kind of blissful wreckage. “that’s better,” she whispered, her voice low, smoky, and satisfied. “kissing makes you not feel how much this bitch hurts,” she laughed “or so i’ve been told.”

you just stared at her, too buzzed to say anything, but feeling a kind of calm you hadn’t known in what felt like forever. the pain was gone now, swallowed by the buzz, the heat, and the way she looked at you. like you were both on the edge, and neither of you cared whether you fell off. the rush from the needle still pulsed through your veins as you stepped out of the bathroom, feeling a bit unmoored, like your body was drifting through space. the party felt louder, the music a distant thump in your chest. everything was hazy, like you were floating, and the crowd around you seemed to blur, their faces indistinct. you were just moving.

without thinking, you found yourself at the center of the living room, where bodies pressed against each other, the air thick with sweat and smoke. you let the beat pull you in, letting go of the last vestiges of control. you didn’t care anymore, about anything, anyone. you just moved, your body responding to the rhythm like it had a life of its own, and for the first time tonight, you felt alive.

you danced with strangers, faces you didn’t recognize, their hands on your hips or shoulders, the energy bouncing between you all like an electric current. their movements were reckless, free, and somehow, it felt like you belonged here, in the middle of this mess. the high made everything feel vivid. intense. like every touch, every glance was magnified.

a guy leaned in close, his breath warm on your neck. you didn’t pull away, letting him get close enough to whisper in your ear. you could barely understand what he was saying, but his hands were on your waist, tugging you closer. you let him, lost in the sensation of being wanted, of not caring what anyone thought. your body was moving like it was made for this chaos. you didn’t think. you just felt.

the music shifted, the bass pumping harder, and for a moment, everything became a blur of neon lights and sweaty bodies, spinning like a dizzying cyclone. you let yourself get swept up in it, lost in the noise and the movement, until you couldn’t keep up anymore. the energy in your legs started to fade, your body heavy and tired. you were buzzing too much to care, but eventually, your feet were no longer dancing, just shuffling you toward the edge of the room.

you stumbled to a couch, sinking into the cushions with a long, relieved sigh. the room around you seemed to shift, the music muffled now, everything distant, like you were underwater. you tried to keep your eyes open, but the pull of exhaustion was too strong. you just couldn’t fight it.

your head sank into the back of the couch, and in a matter of seconds, you were out, completely, utterly gone. the noise of the party continued around you, but you were far away now, floating in the quiet of your mind, somewhere where nothing could touch you. the high, the spinning, the chaos, it all faded to a distant hum. you were weightless, drifting in nothingness, as everything slipped away.

you woke up the next morning to the harsh sound of someone shouting, the words barely making sense at first. “everyone get up and get the hell out!” keeho’s voice rang through the room, piercing the fog of sleep that still clung to you. blinking, you squinted at the blinding light creeping through the window, the ache in your head reminding you of just how much but so little had happened the night before. and you tried to suppress the feeling of vomiting.

you barely had time to process everything when keeho appeared at the door, his eyes wide in sudden panic when he saw you sitting there, a disheveled mess on the couch. “wait... you’re here? yeon and gigi were crazy looking for you last night,” he stammered, clearly flustered. you could tell he hadn’t noticed you before, hadn’t realized you’d passed out here.

“yeah, i think someone gave me dope, ‘m not sure,” you muttered, trying to shake the sleepiness from your mind. “could use some clothes though. i didn’t exactly plan on crashing here and i gotta get my ass to school or my father will actually kill me.”

keeho nodded quickly, his face flushing in embarrassment as he glanced around the room like he didn’t know where to look. “yeah, yeah, no problem. i’ve got some stuff, just go to my room. there’s a drawer with girl clothes from... you know. just grab whatever.” he gestured to the hallway.

you stood up, a little unsteady on your feet, and made your way toward his room. it wasn’t far, but the house felt like a maze now, the remnants of last night’s chaos still hanging in the air. the stale scent of alcohol and smoke clung to everything, and you could hear people stirring, mumbling groggily as they shuffled about, trying to piece together the aftermath of whatever they did.

keeho’s room was a mess too, clothes and half-empty bottles scattered across the floor, papers crumpled on his desk. you spotted the drawer he mentioned and pulled it open. inside, there were a mix of clothes, some definitely not your style.

you pulled out a small crop top, the fabric soft against your skin as you slipped it on. the shirt hugged you in just the right way, but the way it exposed a sliver of your tattoos on your side gave you an odd sense of power. something about the ink on your skin made you feel more present, more you, even in the haze of everything that had gone wrong in the last month, not listening to your brain. you quickly grabbed a pair of athletic shorts from the drawer, the fabric light and comfortable, though they were a bit tight on your hips. it didn’t matter. you weren’t here to impress anyone.

you didn’t know what you were expecting to feel in that moment, but it certainly wasn’t this. it was a weird mix of exhaustion and emptiness, and so thirsty. but at least you weren’t in yesterday’s clothes. stepping out of the room, you took a deep breath, preparing to face the aftermath.

keeho was still in the living room, shouting at people to get out, his tone half-annoyed, half-caring, like he was trying to maintain some level of order in the madness. he saw you and gave you an awkward wave. “yo, you good?” he asked, trying to act casual.

“yeah, just tired,” you mumbled, rubbing your eyes. “where’s the exit?”

keeho pointed to the door and went back to yelling at whoever was still sprawled on the couch. you weren’t in the mood for much interaction. just get out. get back to the north. you walked toward the door, weaving through the mess of bodies and vomit. the cool morning air hit you as soon as you stepped outside, the bright sun already making the world feel like it had reset itself. everything was sharp, clear. the chaos of the night felt distant now, as if you were waking up from a bad dream.

you tried not to think about it as you walked away from the house, the reality of last night still buzzing in your head. you pulled out your phone and called an uber, the cool screen a brief distraction from the foggy mess of your mind. as you waited for it to arrive, you kept thinking about the night. about the haze, the people, the weird feeling of everything slipping through your fingers. you needed to forget it, or at least stop accepting drugs from friendly girls in bathrooms, you had to stick to smoking-only, or your body would end up on the cover of a newspaper with a bad name. you slid into the back of the car when it arrived, the familiar hum of the engine lulling you into a kind of dull trance as you made your way back to the city.

the ride was quiet, a smooth hum of traffic and soft music in the background. it didn’t take long to get back to the luxurious academy, but as you stepped out of the car and walked through the heavily guarded gates, you could feel the eyes on you. people were already filing into the backyard tables for lunch, and you were late, again.

you didn’t care, though. you didn’t care about anything right now. the school was a blur of clean clothes and sharp faces, everyone looking polished and perfect, the exact opposite of how you felt and looked. you ignored the stares, walking past a couple of your classmates who were giving you the side-eye, their whispers barely audible over the din of voices. but you could feel the weight of it. the judgment. the fact that you weren’t exactly like everyone else here, and they knew it.

you made your way to the lunch hall, where your only acquaintance was already sitting, glancing up as you walked in. chaeryeong’s eyes flickered between you and the time. you slid into the seat across from her, barely noticing the food she'd saved for you. you didn’t have the energy for the usual small talk or the smiley faces she always wore.

“are you okay, y/n?” chaeryeong asked softly. you still couldn’t figure out why she stuck around. maybe it was because you’d protected her in some way, kept her safe from karina and her ridiculous mean girl act. chaeryeong was too kind, too good-hearted. she didn’t deserve any of that. you nodded without thinking, just going through the motions. you took a bite of the sandwich, but the food was tasteless, like everything else was. somewhere deep down, you knew you had to get your shit together, but for now, it was easier to keep pretending that everything was fine.

the real reason why you started being even more reckless than before was simple. you missed her. and you hated yourself for it, for missing your mother, the one who abandoned you a year and a half algo. a part of you wanted to believe this was all a plan for you to move in with your rich father and get yourself a place in society, but deep down you knew she found another family with one of the hundreds of men she slept with every night to be able to pay rent. not like you were actually hurt, though. everything you did, every choice you made, was for her. you liked to think she was in a better place now, not living off of selling herself. in your mind, you had to be your best version, just for her. not for that father you have, which was the first one to actually leave, after hearing the news of your mother being pregnant with you. but karma got him, and now he was stuck with you.

he just lets you be, lets you invite your friends over and make a mess. after all, he has maids to clean up after you. but you weren’t about to be that much of a burden, which is why you pushed yourself to excel academically. your mother always said, ‘every single person is a nobody, no matter how rich or poor. the only thing that makes us different is our drive to be better for ourselves.’

you stand up abruptly, pushing your chair back with a little too much force. "i'm going for a smoke," you mutter, barely looking at chaeryeong. before she can say anything and tell you how drugs are ruining you, you’re already heading out of the cafeteria, your steps quick and determined. you make your way to your locker, your fingers fumbling slightly as you pull out a couple of blunts, the familiar smell of them grounding you.

sliding past the neat hallways, you cut through the back of the school, where the gym equipment is stored, away from the eyes of teachers and nosy students. it’s quiet here, the air thick with the scent of rubber and old wood. you light up without hesitation, the first drag hitting your lungs like a small relief. for a moment, it's just you, the world outside fading into the background. you then take a slow hit, the smoke filling your lungs again, and for a second, it feels like everything slows down. you exhale, watching the thin trail of smoke twist and curl in the air before disappearing. the taste is bitter, but it doesn’t matter. it’s the quiet and that’s important right now.

until it wasn’t. from the corner of your eye, you catch movement, footsteps crunching against the gravel. you look up, and there he is, the guy from yesterday. the same cocky grin, the same aura of someone who’s too used to getting what they want. he was dressed in a faux-fur jacket.

“what the hell…” you watched him get closer, his nose slightly scrunching at the smoke coming out your mouth.

"looks like we started on the wrong track," he says, leaning against the chain-link fence with that insufferable smirk still on his face. "name’s heeseung," he adds, like you should be impressed.

you blink, connecting the dots in your head. heeseung. the rich kid. the usual playboy. and then, it clicks, he’s with karina. the thought hits you like a cold splash of water. of course. he’s here because of her. to bribe you, maybe, or to mess with you, make you look bad in front of everyone. you exhale, the smoke swirling between you as you size him up. "what d’ya want?" you ask, your voice flat, not bothering to hide the growing annoyance.

he wrinkles his nose, taking in the air like he’s just stepped into a dumpster. "really smells like shit here, and you look even worse," he says with a disgusted chuckle, glancing around like he’s considering whether or not to leave. you can’t help but laugh, the sound rough but genuine. ‘he really is a piece of work,’ you think, watching his discomfort. without missing a beat, you take another hit, leaning back against the wall as you blow out the smoke. "maybe it's just you," you say with a smirk, your voice teasing but cold.

heeseung raises an eyebrow, clearly not expecting that response, but you can see the hint of a smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. he’s not as untouchable as he thinks. heeseung’s eyes flicker down to your exposed arms and stomach, the tattoos that snake along your skin, and you catch the shift in his expression. he’s staring, but it’s not the way he was a second ago, this is different. "did those hurt?" he asks, his tone almost tentative, like he’s unsure if he should even ask. you raise an eyebrow, glancing at him like he’s just asked the dumbest question in the world.

you stare at him for a long second, then pull in a slow breath. "what do you think?" you say, deadpanning. "of course they did." he blinks, suddenly awkward, rubbing the back of his neck. "right. uh..." he trails off, his gaze flicking around like he’s trying to find something else to say.

"are you cold?" he asks finally, his eyes narrowing slightly at your lack of layers. you’re barely dressed for fall, your shirt thin and your shorts almost too small for the weather. the chill in the air seems to be getting to him more than it’s getting to you. you snort, the sharp edge of your laugh cutting through the tension. "worry about yourself," you mutter, pulling another drag. it’s not like you were cold, it’s more that you weren’t going to admit it to him.

he watches you for a moment, brow furrowed, clearly not buying it. his eyes flicker between your face and the way you’re standing. "yeah, okay," he says, though it sounds more like he's humoring you than agreeing. heeseung takes a step closer, his hands slipping into the pockets of his hoodie as he looks at you with a mix of concern and reluctance. "you know, if you really aren’t fine, i could always-“ he cuts himself off, glancing away for a second, as though considering something before shaking his head. "never mind. it’s not that cold anyway, right?"

“stop trying to make small talk, hedeun-“

“it’s heeseung,” he interrupted, visibly bothered at you getting his name wrong.

“it’s whatever, just tell me what you want, i don’t like spending much time with people like you,” you sighed. “what are you really here for?”

“i heard you sell,” heeseung started, making you let out a loud laugh. “if all you wanted was to smoke, you could’ve just asked me to share, i’m not a monster,” you extended your blunt towards him, but he declined. “i also heard about your mother, and about your old school, and everything about it,” he swallowed, nervously fiddling with his hands, contradicting with his harsh exterior. you raised an eyebrow, the edge of a smirk pulling at the corner of your mouth as you listen to him, the words rolling off his tongue with a strange mix of nervousness and something else, like he’s trying to explain himself but doesn’t really know how. it’s not exactly what you expected, but it’s almost worse.

"is that so?" you reply, voice flat but laced with a quiet venom. you cross your arms over your chest, leaning back slightly as if the conversation doesn’t deserve your full attention. "so, you did all this… research on me, huh? i bet everyone had a lot of nice things to say." it was a weird situation, when you changed schools, all the girls were all over you, excited for a new girl, but as soon as they saw who you were, they escaped, not wanting anything to do with you besides get some smoke and pills.

you couldn’t blame them, you didn’t want to hang out with them either. but karina stayed, until you made the ‘mistake’ of dating the guy she liked at that moment, and since then, she made the promise to destroy your life, if only she could even try.

he seems to falter under your gaze, his eyes dropping to the ground for a moment. "i just... i wanted to understand. i wasn’t trying to judge you or anything. i just..." he rubs his hands together, clearly uncomfortable. "i guess i just thought it’d make sense to know who you are before, well, before we talked again."

you can feel the sharpness in the air, his attempt at an apology or explanation almost laughable. you don’t need his pity. “so, you went and found out about me. what now?”

he looks up at you, a bit of guilt coloring his expression, but it’s hard to tell whether he’s more upset about the fact that you’re not impressed, or that his research didn’t give him the right answers. "i just-" he stops, rubbing the back of his neck again, looking more like a kid who’d gotten caught in a lie than a guy trying to make amends, secretly trying to manipulate you. "i didn’t mean to come off like that. i just... i don’t know how to read you."

your eyes narrow, sizing him up. "well, you can start by not making this about me. whatever you think you found out, that’s your problem." you tilt your head, voice going a little colder. "you’re not the first to assume shit about me. and everything i told everyone on this place about me, is barely the surface, so you can do with that what you want. but i’m not here for your guilt trip."

for a moment, it looks like he might say something else, but he just bites his lip instead, clearly unsure how to break through the wall you’ve just put up. and you’re fine with that. heeseung had no idea why you were being so hard. why he couldn’t get to you like he could with other girls. for some strange reason, he seemed drawn to you, almost as if you were here to save him from the horrible destiny that it is to be with karina. but you didn’t seem the slightest interested in him. and he hated that. he hated the fact that he felt like you were unconsciously pulling him in, but he couldn’t do the same to you.

only, that he could. and he was doing it. you could see it in his eyes, the sparkle for the unknown, you were almost an escapatory for him. from his rich kid, player, facade or maybe his own true personality. you felt the extreme change in demeanor he had since talking to you yesterday, after realizing you weren’t like the girls from his school. he seemed way more open today, and way more relaxed. but you weren’t about to be his little side distraction in his perfect, cushioned life. you weren’t just some novelty.

"good conversation, heeseung," you muttered, clicking your tongue as you stubbed out the blunt against the cement wall you were leaning on, then started to walk away. before you could get too far, you heard him call after you. "hey, wait up!"

you turned back to find a faint desperation in his eyes. "sunghoon's throwing a little something tonight, and i know you don’t usually hang with people like us, but you should come. we might need some of that stuff you’ve got." he gestured to the blunt in your hand. it was almost endearing, how he treated something so simple like it was a secret, like it was taboo. the gap between you two seemed clearer than ever.

“i’ll make sure to get you something good, i hope you can handle it,” you gave him a small smile. heeseung watched you walk away, the weight of your words hanging in the air between you. he was used to girls like karina, who flattered him, who followed him, who played by the rules of his world. but you? you were something else. something he couldn’t quite figure out. he didn’t know why, but something about you made him feel off-balance.

‘you’re not an escapade. you’re not just some distraction,’ he thought to himself, eyes narrowing in confusion. you’re different. something about you. you could ground him. he didn’t know what it was. it wasn’t just the exterior, the rough edges, or the way you didn’t give a shit about his family name or his money. it wasn’t just the way you made him feel like he wasn’t the center of the universe for once. it was everything. the way you looked at him, like he was nothing special, like he was just another guy in a long line of guys who thought they could buy their way into your life.

“but i’m not like them,” he whispered, his jaw tightening, for some reason, he felt as if your opinion about him mattered, as if it would validate him and differentiate him from everyone. his fingers itched as he replayed the way you shut him down, how you were so effortlessly cold, so indifferent to everything he usually took for granted. it drove him insane, but in a way that made him want more.

heeseung's thoughts were interrupted as he heard footsteps approaching. he turned, and there she was, karina, dressed in her usual sleek, effortless luxury. she was all polished skin, perfectly pressed clothes, and a kind of beauty that seemed more crafted than natural. every strand of her hair was in place, her makeup impeccable. she was the kind of girl who seemed born to be admired, the kind who could walk into a room and instantly own it with just a smile. "there you are, baby," she said, her voice smooth and warm, but with an edge of impatience. "i've been looking for you everywhere." her eyes flicked over him, a slight frown pulling at the corners of her lips, probably because she found him standing alone. she wasn't used to seeing him like that. the usual crowd of hangers-on was missing.

heeseung barely acknowledged her greeting, his mind still half on you, half on the uneasy tension you left behind. "yeah, here i am," he replied, his voice distant, distracted. karina raised an eyebrow, noticing his disinterest. “what's up with you? you look like you're a million miles away.” her tone was soft, but there was an undercurrent of concern, or maybe just curiosity. he wasn’t acting like himself, and karina was used to having his full attention.

heeseung felt the instant need to go back to his facade, and gave her a smirk. “i’m just thinking,” he shook his head. karina’s eyes narrowed slightly. "thinking about what?" she asked, as if she wanted to understand what had him in this strange mood he changed all of a sudden. he hesitated, looking off into the distance, towards the empty tennis courts. he didn’t want to bring you up, but something in him pushed him to. "actually," he started slowly, "i’ve been wondering... why do you hate that one girl, y/n, so much?"

karina’s eyes flickered briefly, a subtle shift in her expression that heeseung didn't miss. for a moment, he saw something, just a flash, of discomfort in her gaze, he had been around enough girls to start to notice things like this. it was fleeting, but it was enough to make him pause. she straightened, regaining her composure almost immediately, but he could tell. ‘she’s jealous,’ he realized. not just of you, but of the fact that he was talking to her about you. about you, and not her.

karina stiffened, but only for a second. the smile on her face didn’t falter. ‘it’s fine,’ she thought, ‘don’t overreact. he’s just talking about her because she’s interesting. he’s not actually...’ she couldn’t quite finish the thought. she didn’t want to risk making a scene, not when she was so close to keeping things exactly the way they were. she needed him. she couldn’t let you take him away from her. so she would do her best to portray you as someone horrible.

"i don’t hate her," she replied after a beat, her voice a little too controlled. "i just don’t get her."

heeseung raised an eyebrow, unimpressed by her attempt to deflect. "you’re not fooling me," he said, his tone soft but insistent. "you don’t like her. why?"

karina let out a quiet sigh, her gaze shifting down, away from his eyes. she was debating whether or not to say what was really on her mind. finally, she spoke, her voice low. "she just… waltzes into any group, any situation, with that awful motorcycle and a hand full of drugs, and everyone loves her. no effort. she doesn’t have to try. and i hate that."

heeseung frowned, confused. "what do you mean? i don’t get it."

karina’s eyes flickered with something darker now, the frustration seeping through her composed exterior. "i mean, i work for everything. i work for people’s approval, for their attention, for their affection. i have to try, i have to be the right kind of person, say the right things, look the right way. and then she shows up, all… whatever she is, and everyone just falls over themselves for that druggie. no trying. she doesn’t care about any of it, and still, she gets everything." her voice grew harder, colder, as if she was speaking from experience. "it’s like she doesn’t even have to try, and that’s what pisses me off."

heeseung couldn’t help but study her face, watching the jealousy simmer in her eyes. it was subtle, almost masked by her cool demeanor, but he could see it now, clear as day. karina was used to being the one people admired, the one people worked to impress. and you, someone who didn’t play by any of the rules, someone who didn't care, had that same magnetic pull, without any of the effort. and it bothered her more than she wanted to admit.

karina stiffened, her lips curling slightly. "that’s exactly the problem," she snapped. "she doesn’t belong here, and she thinks that just because her father finally acknowledged her, and suddenly she’s super rich, she can act however she pleases. but it’s not like that."

the thought made him uneasy, but he didn’t show it. instead, he shrugged, his gaze drifting back to where you had disappeared. "i don’t think it’s the money," he muttered, almost to himself. "i think she just is. and maybe that’s what makes her different."

karina didn’t respond. she simply stepped closer, closing the distance between them, but he could feel the slight shift in the air, the way her usual easy confidence had faltered, just a little. "whatever you say," karina finally said, forcing a smile back onto her face. "but just remember, she’s just a low life addict, that’s all she is, and will ever be. you don’t want to get too close to someone like that."

heeseung didn’t meet her eyes. instead, his gaze lingered on the spot where you had walked away, and the words from earlier replayed in his head, the ones that had stuck with him the most, ‘i hope you can handle it.’

later that night, heeseung found himself at sunghoon’s house, though his mind was somewhere else entirely. the mansion was alive with the thumping pulse of bass-heavy music, laughter, and the clink of bottles being passed around. it was the kind of party sunghoon always threw, lavish, high-energy, packed with people who were either too drunk to remember their names or too wealthy to care about anything else. people were dancing in the living room, some on the massive leather couches, others sprawled across the marble floors, playing some ridiculous drinking game. it was a familiar scene, people letting loose, showing off, and pretending to forget the rules for a few hours.

but none of that mattered to heeseung right now. he was standing off to the side, leaning against a wall, a drink in his hand but barely touching it. his mind kept drifting back to you, the way you’d walked off earlier, the way karina’s words had lingered in his head. there was something about you that gnawed at him, and he couldn’t shake the feeling that tonight would be the night that would reveal something important.

he didn’t even know if you’d show up tonight, but he couldn’t stop thinking about it. would you? would you show up, walk through the door with that effortless confidence, and completely flip the energy of the room without even trying? it wasn’t even about impressing people. it was the way you didn’t need to try. you just were. and it was like you could walk into any situation and make everyone else’s chaos feel like it was secondary to you.

he tried to shake it off, pulling his phone out of his pocket to check for something. nothing. his friends were blowing up the group chat, but none of it caught his attention. it was a flurry of photos, plans to leave with a girl, someone complaining about the music being too vulgar, but nothing about you, because you weren’t part of his life. maybe that’s why he kept looking around the room, scanning the crowd, hoping, wishing that you would suddenly appear, even though he knew he was being ridiculous. you probably wouldn’t even care about coming to a place like this. too many people trying to impress each other. too much pretending.

he threw back the rest of his drink on one of sunghoon’s exotic plants, setting the glass down on the nearest table, feeling his mind drift further from the party. he leaned against the wall again, the chatter and music blurring into the background, but his focus remained fixed on the front door. he kept wondering if you'd walk through it.

across the room, jake appeared, grinning wide, holding up two shot glasses. “heeseung! come on, man, stop moping in the corner and have some fun.” he raised his eyebrows, urging him over. heeseung waved him off, still distracted. “i’m good. just got a lot on my mind.”

“yeah? don’t let it ruin the vibe, dude. you’re at a party, not a therapy session.” jake clapped him on the shoulder and turned away to rejoin the crowd. heeseung’s eyes flicked over to the front door again, and he felt that familiar twist in his stomach. ‘she’s not coming,’ he thought, but the doubt lingered. the weird hope that maybe, just maybe, she would show up. ‘she doesn’t belong here, and she doesn’t want to belong here,’ he told himself. this world’s not your scene. but that thought only seemed to make him want to see you even more.

for a moment, he wondered why he cared so much. why was he fixated on whether you’d show up or not? it didn’t make sense. he barely knew you, and yet everything about you felt like a puzzle he had to solve. and now, standing in the middle of this extravagant, noisy party, he felt that pull again, the one that made him question everything, including himself.

he glanced at the door again, half-expecting to see you walk through, but nothing. just the same crowd of people, laughing and drinking, playing their games. maybe you didn’t care about these kinds of parties. maybe you didn’t care about any of this at all.

heeseung pushed through the sliding glass door that led to the backyard, escaping the chaos of the party. the cool night air hit him like a splash of water, and he took a deep breath, trying to clear his head.

the backyard was quieter, but his mind was still buzzing. he was leaning against the brick wall near the pool when he spotted karina on the other side of the yard. she was laughing, leaning into some guy with slicked-back hair, a smile too perfect to be genuine. the guy was clearly into her, his hand resting a little too comfortably on her waist, but karina didn’t seem to care. she was toying with him, teasing him, her eyes glancing over at heeseung for only a second, as if she was trying to make him jealous, but he wasn’t bothered.

heeseung didn’t care. not tonight. the sight of karina flirting with someone else didn’t stir anything in him. he didn’t even feel a spark of jealousy of that guy not being him. it was strange, but in the back of his mind, he kept thinking about you, about how you didn’t fit into this world at all, and yet, you seemed to have more of an impact on him than anyone else in the room.

he was about to turn back to search for jake, when the sound of raised voices cut through the air. it wasn’t just loud, it was intense.

he turned, his curiosity piqued, and followed the noise toward the front of the house. he didn’t know what was going on, but something told him it wasn’t good. as he rounded the corner, he saw the commotion, a guard-like guy, probably hired by sunghoon, was blocking the front door, holding his hand out like a wall. and there, standing just a few feet away from him, were you, fuming, your hands raised in defiance, and your expression unreadable but full of fire.

heeseung’s heart skipped a beat. he couldn’t believe it. you were actually arguing with the guy, not giving a damn about the way he stood there like he owned the door.

“i can’t let you in. you’re not on the list mr. park provided,” the guy was saying, his voice deep and dismissive, clearly not taking you seriously. you, however, didn’t care about his rules or his attitude. "i don’t care if i’m on that fuck-ass list or not, let me in," you snapped, leaning in so close your face almost brushed against his. "move out of my way before i make you."

heeseung watched, a little impressed, a little surprised at how you held your ground. you weren’t backing down for anything, no one was going to push you around. the guy was trying to reason with you, but you weren’t having it. before things could escalate, heeseung walked up, cutting through the tension with his calm presence. the guy looked at him with confusion, but heeseung ignored him, instead turning to you.

“hey,” he said, his voice cool but loud enough for you to hear over the noise. “it’s fine. let her in.”

you stopped, glancing up at him with a look of surprise in your eyes, like you hadn’t expected him to step in. but then your face softened slightly, and he gave a quick, almost imperceptible nod, signaling to the guard that it was okay.

"i said it’s fine," heeseung continued, keeping his gaze on the guy who was still hesitating. "she’s here with me."

the guard’s eyes flicked between you two, clearly unsure, but he finally backed off. “whatever,” he muttered, stepping aside. “but you’re on thin ice, lady.”

you didn’t even acknowledge the guy’s words. you turned without a second glance, and motioned for your friend to follow your lead. “gigi, let’s go,” you said, the confidence in your voice as clear as day.

heeseung blinked, surprised by the sudden appearance of the girl who had been standing quietly behind you the entire time, playing with her nails. you both were dressed in tiny dresses that revealed too much, clearly ready to go somewhere else after this. giselle wasn’t as loud or bold as you, but there was something in the way she carried herself with her salmon colored pin-straight hair and long nails, that suggested she was just as comfortable in her own skin. she followed you without hesitation, taking slow steps toward the door.

the two of you walked together like you didn’t even notice the opulence of the house, the flashy people, or the music blaring from inside. you seemed completely indifferent to the party scene, to all of it, and heeseung couldn’t help but admire it and wonder how had he not noticed you before. while everyone else was caught up in the noise, the drinking, the pretension, you and giselle were just there. not needing anything from this world. not caring about any of it. you only seemed to care about yourselves, about the quiet between you, and maybe that was the most fascinating thing about you.

heeseung was about to say something, but you didn’t even look back at him. instead, you pushed your way through the crowd with your friend, making your way to the kitchen without a second thought. he followed, but kept his distance, not wanting to intrude.

you weren’t here for the party. you were here for you, and he couldn’t help but wonder how long he could keep watching from the sidelines before he, too, would be drawn into whatever world you existed in.

“alright,” you sighed, taking a few small plastic bags from your bra, and a cigarette box. you weren’t any kind of professional underground dealer, but you were still cautious, if not, word would get to your father and it would be a mess.

“i got you, ice, it’s the powder by the way, i got molly, those pills with happy faces on them, and weed… oh, and we pre-rolled them for you, they’re kind of fat, i’m really nice like that,” you smiled at heeseung, seeing him stare at you.

“you good?” you asked, “i didn’t bring anything else, i don’t think you’d even know how to take it,” you stepped back, crossing your arms.

“oh, yeah, yeah, that’s good,” he shook his head, snapping out of his trance. “can i scan-pay you?” heeseung asked, realizing, of course, he didn’t have any cash on him.

“yeah, it’s alright,” you said, pulling out your phone and typing in an amount before switching to a qr code for him to scan. for a moment, you considered scamming him, but decided against it. it would’ve been easy, he didn’t even ask about the prices.

once the payment went through, you flashed a quick, satisfied smile back to giselle. you could already feel happier knowing you would get out of this mansion. as you began to turn away, heeseung’s gaze shifted, his eyes landing on someone across the room. “hold on,” he muttered, scanning the crowd. he spotted jungwon nearby, leaning casually against the wall, chatting with a few people. heeseung grabbed the bags from the counter and stepped over to him.

“hey,” heeseung called, catching jungwon’s attention. “take this to sunghoon, yeah?” he passed the items over, his tone nonchalant. jungwon raised an eyebrow, looking at the bags before meeting heeseung’s eyes. “man, the things you get yourself into for a girl.”

heeseung shrugged, offering a half-smile. “it’s for me. just get it to him. he’ll know what to do.”

jungwon gave him a nod, slipping the bags into his jacket pocket. “got it.”

heeseung’s eyes followed you and giselle as you made your way toward the door, his steps quickening as he caught up with you just before you reached the curb.

“hey, where are you two headed?” he asked, voice casual but with a hint of concern. you looked at him, a little surprised to see him following. “we’re going to the south,” you said, glancing at giselle. “there’s a car race. about half an hour away, and since i had to come all the way up here for you, we’re hoping to make it to the after party.”

heeseung nodded, his gaze lingering on you. “i’ll drive you,” he said, his tone suddenly firm. “we wouldn’t want you, both of you, getting into any trouble out here.”

you raised an eyebrow, skeptical, but too high to argue. you glanced at giselle, who was lighting another blunt, and let out a sigh. "fine," you said, already feeling the weight of the night catching up with you. "i’m not in the mood to call a cab and waste money." giselle shot you a look that was part judgment, part annoyance, but she kept quiet. you could feel her disapproval, but you were beyond caring at this point.

heeseung led the way, and you followed without a word. when you reached the driveway, your eyes widened slightly at the car parked there. heeseung’s car was a sleek, black sports car, the kind that turned heads without even trying. it was polished to perfection, the curves of the body glinting in the dim light of the streetlamp. it was the kind of car that screamed wealth, effortlessly.

“is this yours?” you asked, though you already knew the answer. it was the first time something he had impressed you. heeseung smirked as he opened the passenger door for you. “yeah. pretty sure it’s faster than any cab you’d get out here.”

you shook your head, sliding into the leather seat. giselle climbed in at the back, sitting with her arms crossed, clearly not impressed. she still had that cold, distant air about her when it came to heeseung and his “scrooge mcduck” world.

heeseung didn’t seem bothered. he slid into the driver’s seat, started the engine, and the low purr of the car’s power seemed to cut through the tension in the air. as he pulled out of the driveway, the smooth hum of the car filled the silence between you all.

it was an uncomfortable ride, but at least it was fast, and you weren’t wasting money on a cab. you stared out the window, the city lights blurring by, while giselle stared ahead, looking as unimpressed with heeseung and his world as ever. heeseung, on the other hand, kept his eyes on the road, his expression unreadable. the drive was smooth, fast. but even as he focused on the road, his mind kept drifting back to you.

he glanced over at you, your face illuminated by the streetlights, your expression unreadable. and for a brief second, he realized that he didn’t want this ride to end. he didn’t want to stop being close to you, even if just for a moment.

as you got closer to the south side, the vibe of the neighborhood started to change. heeseung could feel it in the air. the buildings were older, the streets narrower, the houses less pristine than the ones he was used to. the gleaming luxury of his own world felt miles away. his fingers tightened on the steering wheel as he took in the unfamiliar surroundings, a slight unease creeping in.

you glanced over at him, sensing the shift in his energy. “you okay?” you asked, eyes narrowing slightly as you noticed him tense up and grip the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white. heeseung didn’t respond at first. he just kept driving, his gaze flicking between the rearview mirror and the unfamiliar streets. it was clear he wasn’t used to this. “yeah,” he said, his voice cool but there was something off about it. “just... not exactly my usual neighborhood.”

you gave him a knowing look, the faintest smirk tugging at the corner of your lips. “don’t worry,” you said, your voice light but with an edge of seriousness. “i’ll protect you, whatever happens pretty boy.”

heeseung shot you a glance, eyes flicking over to meet yours, before rolling his eyes. “i don’t need protection, thanks,” he muttered, but there was an almost imperceptible tension in his jaw that gave him away.

you could tell he was uncomfortable, and it wasn’t just the drive. his world and this one were different in every way, and he was out of his element, but you didn’t say anything. it was clear enough without needing to spell it out. heeseung took a turn down an alleyway, the pavement rough and uneven. he parked the car next to a few other vehicles, feeling the weight of the decision. the streetlights here weren’t as bright, and there was a certain stillness in the air that felt too quiet for comfort. his mind flashed briefly to the idea of getting robbed, but he pushed the thought away, shaking his head.

“don’t take it personally,” you said, reading his discomfort easily. you and giselle climbed out of the car, both of you moving with purpose. “come on,” you said, glancing back at him. “the after party’s just down the street.”

heeseung hesitated, but finally stepped out of the car. the low hum of the engine idled in the background, the sound of the city slowly creeping in around him. he walked behind you and giselle, trying not to seem too out of place as you led the way out the alley.

the party was just around the corner, and the closer you got, the louder the music became. from a distance, it looked like any other chaotic house party, but heeseung could sense the difference. the people were rougher, the energy sharper. it felt like a different world, one he had no real experience in. you shot him a glance over your shoulder as you reached the front door. “you’re fine,” you said, almost as if you were trying to reassure him, though you both knew there was no guarantee of that. you gave him a small smirk before pushing open the door.

heeseung paused at the threshold, looking around. this was a place where he didn’t belong, a world where people didn’t care about money or status. it was raw, unpredictable, and everything in him wanted to retreat, but something kept him standing there. you had pulled him into this world, whether he liked it or not. heeseung followed you and giselle into the backyard, where the atmosphere felt more relaxed, but still lively. the yard was filled with groups of people gathered around, casually chatting and laughing. the air was thicker here, filled with the mix of cigarette smoke and the low hum of music coming from the house.

heeseung couldn’t help but feel out of place as his gaze landed on two guys, who were lounging on a bench, laughing with a couple of girls. their casual demeanor was in sharp contrast to the tightly wound posture he’d been carrying since arriving. they noticed him immediately, their eyes flicking to him, then back to you and giselle. noting he was one of ‘yours.’

“girls, you bailed on us tonight,” keeho pouted.

“we told you we were going to sell at one of y/n new classmates party. your little suicide car race isn’t that important,” giselle rolled her eyes kicking keeho’s shin with her heel, making him hiss.

yeonjun raised an eyebrow and smirked at heeseung, who was still tense, and looked like a mannequin from a golf store. “yo, man, you look like you’re about to shit yourself already. what’s with the stiff face?” he asked, clearly amused by heeseung’s discomfort. keeho chuckled, looking at him with a knowing smile.

“you’re here with her, though,” keeho added, tilting his head in your direction. “so, you’re alright, huh? wasn’t expecting to see you here, rich kid.”

you laughed at his comment, taking giselle’s blunt and taking a drag out of it.

heeseung wasn’t sure how to respond. he wasn’t sure why he felt so out of place. it wasn’t like he had anything against the people here. still, he couldn’t shake the tension in his shoulders. “yeah, just not... used to this,” he muttered, glancing around at the unfamiliar scene.

you caught his eye, noticing the tension that still hadn’t fully left him. with a small grin, you spoke up, your tone light but firm. “don’t sweat it. i said i’d protect you didn’t i? you’re fine. just enjoy the night.”

yeonjun laughed and leaned back, gesturing to the people around him. “we’re bro’s, right? just have a good time. you’re with us now,” he said, his smile more welcoming than teasing.

you and heeseung exchanged a quick look, something unspoken passing between you before you broke the silence with a small smile. “want a drink?” you asked, your tone casual but with an undercurrent of something more, like you were offering him a way to settle in, just a little. heeseung hesitated, glancing around at the people milling about, some laughing, some lost in their own world. he still wasn’t quite comfortable, still felt like an outsider, but the offer was simple enough. he nodded slowly. “yeah. sure.”

you led the way over to a small table where drinks were being passed around, beer cans, a few bottles of cheap liquor, and what looked like a mix of makeshift cocktails. the scene felt different than the polished, curated parties he was used to. you grabbed a bottle of something brown and poured it into a plastic cup, handing it to him. “you’re unlucky, i don’t have any fancy cocktails,” you said with a half-smirk, leaning back slightly as he took the drink.

“thanks,” he muttered, eyeing the cup with a little wariness before taking a careful sip. it was strong. way stronger than he expected, and he quickly forced himself to swallow, trying not to show that it burned. heeseung took another drink, feeling the warmth spread through his chest as the alcohol hit him. the tension in his body started to loosen, but his mind kept swirling around the question that had been nagging him ever since you first crossed his path.

“why are you staying with me?” he asked, his voice quieter than usual, a little more curious as you two settled down on two plastic chairs. “why not go back to your friends? seems like you’d rather be with them.” he watched you for a second as you absentmindedly looked around. for a moment, you didn’t answer, but then you met his gaze, your eyes soft and a little more open than usual, like you were letting him see something deeper.

“because i knew you wouldn’t feel comfortable by yourself,” you said casually, but there was something in your tone, something almost kind, that caught him off guard. you shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal, but he could tell it was, at least to you. heeseung blinked, surprised. he hadn’t expected that kind of answer. it wasn’t what he’d imagined, especially with how standoffish you'd seemed earlier. you weren’t trying to be here out of obligation, or to entertain some rich kid from the party.

and then, as the silence stretched on for a second, he noticed something in your manner. something that shifted, just a little. your body language had relaxed, your words were slower, more open. heeseung's gaze narrowed, and he took a longer look at you. “wait a minute,” he said, voice a little more cautious. “you’re high, aren’t you?” he laughed.

“yeah, i’ve been for the last ten minutes,” you admitted with a small laugh, your words softening at the edges. “it’s just the same thing i gave you, though. don’t get all worried on me.”

“so you’re... this you?” he asked, motioning vaguely to the two of you, to the situation, to everything happening around you. “not the one back at the school?”

you shrugged again, but this time it was more relaxed. “yeah, i guess so,” you said, eyes flickering away for a second, like you were deciding whether to share more or pull back. but then, you met his gaze again, almost like you were daring him to say something about it. “i thought i’ve always been me, but now that you mention it. i guess i kind of act with some sort of resentment to you guys,”

he took another drink, then looked at you, his voice softer this time. “why’s that?”

“hard feeling,” you said simply. “family things, but it’s all handled.” you lied, not wanting to open up to him completely yet. there was definitely a change in him, and you noticed it. and in his eyes you could see the slight desperation and need. it was his new demeanour that made him different. you couldn't explain, because words couldn't even clarify what was starting to lure you in.

“heeseung, seriously, i’m opening up to you, and you keep looking at me like you want to fuck,” you said out of nowhere. he instantly tensed up and looked away.

“i’m sorry, i didn’t realize,” he said. it was obvious he didn’t want you to think of him as a player anymore, he was actually trying to please you now. you let out a soft, teasing laugh, leaning back in your chair, knowing exactly what you were doing. you decided to play into his usual game just enough to give him a bit of satisfaction. "do you?"

heeseung immediately turned toward you, eyes widening in surprise as he caught the playful glint in yours. he knew exactly what you were hinting at, but he still tried to keep his cool, pretending to be unfazed. "huh?"

"do you… want to fuck?" you asked casually, watching him with a challenge in your eyes.

his breath caught for a split second, but he quickly composed himself. he opened his mouth, unsure of how to answer, and hesitated. "i… don’t know," he muttered, trying to play it safe, though his voice betrayed a slight crack of uncertainty. you couldn’t help but laugh softly, your head tilting back as you let out a short snort. you met his eyes again, smirking. "what do you mean you don’t know? is it really that hard to say what you want?"

heeseung shifted uncomfortably, clearly trying to play it cool, but the nervousness was obvious. and it was so very clear that he wanted it. he ran a hand through his hair, his gaze flickering away for a moment. "what even is your point y/n?"

you shrugged nonchalantly, your tone lighter now. "nothing, just asking."

after that night, things were different. heeseung wasn't the same. he wasn't playing games anymore, not the way he used to. it wasn’t like he’d suddenly become someone else, but around you, he changed. that distance he always kept, it started to shrink.

you could feel it in the way he acted, the way he’d look at you sometimes when you were talking in class or lunch with your friend, like he was listening for real and not just pretending. he was less guarded, more real with you.

you started meeting up behind the gym often. no one ever really saw you, and that’s how you both liked it. the air was always a little warmer there, the kind of quiet where you could actually talk. you’d smoke, and he’d sit with you, talking about everything and nothing at all. and even when the conversation would die down, there was this comfortable silence between you two. the kind that felt easy, like you didn’t have to fill every gap with words.

one day, he even just showed up at your door, standing there with his dad, holding a gift basket. you froze when you opened the door. heeseung, here, with his dad, visiting your dad. it was almost laughable. you never thought you’d see the day, but there he was, a little nervous, but still trying to act cool.

"uh, hey," he said, like it wasn’t the most awkward thing ever. "my dad was going to visit your dad... said something about business visits or whatever, so i came with him."

you blinked, still processing, then stepped aside to let them in. after that, you both started to realize how much closer you’d gotten. things weren’t just about secret meetings anymore. they were about knowing each other, understanding each other in a way you didn’t before.

heeseung wasn’t a player anymore, not around you. he wasn’t hiding behind any walls or pretending to be something he wasn’t. it was like he was finally letting himself be seen, and you liked that. a lot.

even with all the changes, even with how much closer you two had become, there was still that one thing hanging between you. heeseung was still with karina. it wasn’t like you didn’t notice it. the way they would still walk around school together, the way she’d smile at him when he passed by. there were no obvious signs of trouble, no cracks in their relationship that you could see.

even though heeseung would drop little hints, those quiet, uncertain words when the two of you were alone ‘i’m thinking about breaking up with her…’ it never seemed to go anywhere. he would say it with a kind of vulnerability, like he was testing the waters, like he was hoping you’d say something that would push him in one direction or the other.

you couldn’t help but feel frustrated. there was this constant tug-of-war between what he said to you in private and what he did when the world was watching. it felt like he was trying to keep one foot in both worlds, but you couldn’t help feeling like you were left waiting in the middle, unsure if you were just a momentary distraction or something more. you told yourself you shouldn’t read too much into it. that he was confused, that maybe it wasn’t the right time, or maybe he didn’t have the courage to make the change. but every time he’d tell you he wanted to leave her, you’d see the conflict in his eyes, that quiet desperation to be understood, to be seen. still, he never followed through. he never made the choice.

you stayed friendly, maybe out of habit, maybe because you weren’t quite ready to let go of the connection you’d built. you let him tag along when you hung out with your friends down south at the house. a spot that was more a sanctuary than anything else, away from the world, away from expectations.

heeseung still had that rich boy aura about him, the one that made him stick out in a crowd of worn-out jeans and streetwise attitudes. but your friends didn’t mind. they were good with him being there, even if they teased him a little. mocking his clean-cut appearance, joking about how his designer clothes didn’t exactly fit the vibe. they liked him well enough, though. it was obvious he wasn’t as comfortable with them as he was in his own circles, but he did try. and they did notice how close you’d gotten to him.

“look at mr. fancy pants over here,” yeonjun would joke, nudging him as he sipped on whatever drink was put in front of him. “you sure you’re not lost, rich boy? this isn’t exactly sushi bar territory.”

he’d smile, a little awkwardly, trying to laugh it off, but there was always a flicker of discomfort behind his eyes. he wasn’t like them, not really. they knew it, and he knew it, but it didn’t matter as much when he was there, surrounded by your friends, just being with you.

you’d catch moments, though. quiet ones when he was staring off into the distance, or when his laugh felt a little too forced. you knew it was because he was still stuck. still torn between two worlds, two lives. and you were tired of being in the middle of it. though, what ou didn’t know, that for him it was much more than that. he was stuck between two girls of different worlds. karina and you.

karina wasn’t someone he actually liked, he was just with her for his reputation and his family. but still, he was with her. and you, you were absolutely everything to him. you were the trouble that came along with bad decisions and the reward that came after them.

it all came crashing down one night when you and your friends were hanging out at the house, like you’d done countless times before. the air was thick with smoke, the sounds of laughter and music filling the dim-lit space as everyone just tried to forget for a few hours. it was supposed to be like any other night, a break from everything that weighed you down. but then, out of nowhere, the door slammed open.

sirens wailed in the distance, but it was already too late. the police stormed in, uniformed and angry, their boots pounding against the cracked floors, their voices demanding silence. they didn’t give anyone a chance to react before they were ripping through everything. throwing aside old records, scattering things off shelves, knocking over bottles.

"this is a raid," one of the officers barked, his voice cutting through the chaos. "everything’s getting confiscated."

your heart sank as they swept through the room, destroying everything. things you had no idea they’d even care about. all the memories, the things that had made this place feel like home, were being taken apart right in front of you. your childhood, your sanctuary, was crumbling.

you stood frozen for a second, not sure what to do, but your instinct kicked in. no way in hell. this wasn’t right. you couldn’t let them destroy it all. you rushed forward, intent on stopping them, shouting at the officers to stop, to leave, to just go away.

"who the hell do you think you guys are?! this is my house! you can’t do this!" you screamed, your hands shaking with adrenaline as you tried to push past one of the officers to get to the old furniture, the things that meant something to you. everything in this house had a story, a memory. and they were tearing it down, trying to find something.

but before you could get too far, a hand grabbed your arm, pulling you back. it was heeseung, his grip firm but gentle as he yanked you away from the officers.

“stop,” he muttered urgently, his voice tense. "you’re not gonna win this. they’ll arrest you, they’ll make it worse." even if he was slightly scared, and terrified of getting himself arrested and the word getting to his father, he had to take care of you. he just wondered how they found out about this place, a drug raid was almost impossible, you were within the legal bounds.

you were almost angry at heeseung for not letting you go. in that moment, as the officers trashed everything that meant something to you, the anger bubbled up inside. how could he stand there, calm and collected, trying to hold you back, when everything you cared about was being destroyed? it felt like betrayal, even though you knew deep down it wasn’t his fault. he wasn’t the one doing this.

you tried to pull away from him, your heart racing, your mind spinning. "let me go, heeseung!" you snapped, your voice sharp and furious. " i can’t just stand here and watch them do this! they’re destroying everything!"

but he held you tighter, his grip unyielding. “i’m not letting you make things worse. not like this,” he said, his voice tight but calm, like he knew exactly what you needed, even if you didn’t want to hear it.

you yanked your arm again, almost reckless with frustration. your pulse was pounding in your ears. “why? why are you stopping me? i can’t just let them-” you broke off, your voice cracking. you didn’t want to admit how scared you were, how helpless you felt. in that moment, you realized, there wasn’t anybody there for you. the house of your mother was being searched, and she wasn’t here. and you knew you’re father wouldn’t care.

his eyes softened, and for a moment, you thought he might let go. but instead, he pulled you closer, his voice dropping to something gentler, but firm. “because if you go after them now, you’re just giving them more reason to hurt you. to make it worse. this isn’t the time.”

you hated that he was right. you absolutely hated it.

it wasn’t just about the stuff. it wasn’t just about the house. it was the fact that it all felt like a reminder of how much you didn’t have control over. the way things kept slipping through your fingers, no matter how hard you tried to hold on. you looked up at him, your chest rising and falling in sharp breaths. “they can’t just take everything,” you muttered, the anger still hot in your throat. “this was my life. my memories. this house is all i am.”

heeseung didn’t say anything right away. he just looked at you. like he really understood. he got it, even if you weren’t sure you could let him. finally, he exhaled slowly. "i know. but this isn’t the way to fix it."

you stood there, your body still tense, but slowly, you started to feel the reality of the situation hit you. he wasn’t letting you be reckless because he didn’t care. he was trying to protect you from making a bigger mistake, from getting hurt. from losing more. with a heavy sigh, you slumped against him, the fight draining from your body. you weren’t sure if you were more angry at the situation or at yourself for feeling so helpless. but in that moment, as the chaos continued around you, all you could do was lean into him. just a little, because you knew you couldn’t do this alone.

after the chaos of the raid, everything seemed to move in slow motion. the police had confiscated everything they wanted that seemed suspicious, leaving nothing but a wrecked space behind. they’d taken their time, ensuring that no one was left with any trace of what used to be there. when it was over, the officers had turned their attention to you, with blaming guns in hand.

you hadn’t even realized they were going to search you until they were doing it, their hands cold and impersonal as they patrolled your pockets, your bag, your shoes. your heart hammered in your chest, and you were still shaking from the adrenaline, from everything that had just happened. everything felt surreal, like you were watching it happen to someone else. but the reality of it hit hard when they finally let you out of the interrogation room, their eyes on you like you were some kind of suspect.

you stood outside the police station, the weight of everything pressing down on you. the air felt colder now, the harshness of the situation settling in. you were free to go, but the damage had been done. you felt exposed, like a part of you had been torn away that you couldn’t get back. but you couldn’t stay there anymore. the night had stretched on, and you just needed to leave.

as you stood there, trying to process the mess that had been made of your life, you heard someone approaching from behind. you didn’t need to turn around to know who it was. his footsteps, the way he moved, the tension in his gait, it was heeseung.

he walked up to you, his face serious, eyes darker than usual. "are you okay?" he asked, though you could tell he wasn’t asking just out of concern. he was searching for something else, something deeper. you didn’t answer right away. you couldn’t. instead, you just gave a tight nod, your throat too tight to speak. but then he said something that made your stomach drop.

“it was karina,” he said.

you blinked, confused. “what do you mean?”

heeseung exhaled sharply, shaking his head slightly, like he couldn’t believe it. "she’s the one who called the cops. i know it. she slipped up when i talked to her a couple of minutes ago, she somehow knew i was here.”

a cold feeling swept over you as everything clicked into place. karina. karina had followed him all the way to the house, had gotten the cops involved. it made sense, but the realization didn’t make it hurt any less.

“she did this?” you asked quietly, your voice hollow. you didn’t need to say much more. it was all there. you didn’t actually believe it was possible for someone to be such a horrible human being. heeseung didn’t respond immediately. his jaw clenched, and you could see how much it was bothering him. how much it hurt him to admit it, but he couldn’t deny it.

"yeah," he muttered, his voice low. "i didn’t want to believe it at first, but... it’s clear now." he looked at you, his expression almost guilty, like he was carrying something heavy. "i never wanted you to be caught up in that. i never thought she’d go this far. i broke up with her, she kept bothering me about being here."

you turned away, looking out into the night, the cool air stinging your face. "so what now?" you asked, the words coming out flat, tired. heeseung stepped closer, his voice more earnest now, as if he wanted to say something, to fix things. "i don’t know," he admitted quietly. "i never wanted it to be like this. i don’t want to lose you... but i don’t know how to fix this either. i don’t want to hurt you."

you glanced at him, feeling the weight of the moment. part of you wanted to scream, to say everything that was building up inside, but another part of you just felt... defeated. because the truth was, even now, with everything that had happened, you still didn’t have an answer. and maybe that was the problem. you could feel it. the tension that had been there for so long. the feelings that you couldn’t fully express, that he couldn’t seem to acknowledge. and here you were, caught in the middle of it all.

“you’ve already hurt me, heeseung,” you whispered, your voice barely audible. “but i guess... i guess i’ve been letting you. because i still don’t know how to walk away.”

heeseung’s expression faltered. "i never wanted you to feel that way."

you shook your head. “you don’t get it, do you? it’s not about what you want anymore. it’s about what’s already happened.”

he didn’t have a response. all he could do was stand there, looking at you like he wanted to fix things, but knowing he couldn’t. because when it came down to it, the choice had never been yours. and it sure as hell wasn’t his to make anymore.

for the next few days, you avoided heeseung like the plague. and he couldn’t get close to you. everytime he tried, something got in the way, his friends, responsibilities. and you were fine with that. you just had to accept that everything that happened with him was just a slip up, and you’d soon be in your usual bad girl exterior, ignoring him one again.

but it wasn’t that easy. not with karina still out to make your life impossible. she was still angry at you for whatever reason. angry enough to confront you again.

“how are you doing, y/n?” karina pulled out a chair in your empty lunch table, sitting down neatly on it.

“what the fuck do you want?” you spat, annoyed by her presence. you could already feel the stares of students and teachers, as they were informed of what happened.

“geez, calm down, we wouldn’t want you to get a violence complaint and get sent back to the police station, wouldn’t we?”

that was all she needed to say, the single words that came out of her mouth. and she was face down on the ground. you pressed your knee on her back, keeping her grounded, as your hand made her face keep contact with the dirty floor. “you keep fucking messing with me karina, i told you i wouldn’t let it go.”

from a table not to far away, heeseung sat with his friends, watching the scene intently, and for once, heeseung felt himself worrying about a girl. not karina, but you. for once he felt the need to protect you, even if you were already capable on your own.

a small drop of blood from her perfect skin was enough to make you land yourself in the principal’s office. after the fight in the cafeteria, everything changed. you were suspended for your actions, the consequences of that impulsive moment catching up with you. karina had pushed you too far, it was messy. it was ugly. and now, it was your reality.

you spent the next week alone, mostly, apart from that day your father made you attend rehab, because for some reason the school requested it, there you met some nice people. the suspension meant missing school, being grounded and missing your friends down south who kept spamming your phone, and also being forced to face the aftermath of everything. it was a strange kind of isolation. you hadn’t expected to feel so disconnected. the chaos of the fight, the anger you’d been holding back for so long. it all felt like it had burned itself out in that one violent moment. and now, there was just the quiet, with nothing left to do but think.

one afternoon, as you sat on your huge balcony, smoking a cigarette, since your father confiscated everything else, you tried to let the smoke clear your head. you watched the world outside, the fancy cars in traffic passing below, people going about their business, and it felt almost surreal. like everything that had happened. the raid, the fight, was part of some other version of your life. but you couldn’t forget. you couldn’t ignore the tension in your chest. the weight of everything you’d lost. even if you didn’t want to admit it, even if you didn’t want to feel it, you still missed him. you missed the parts of him that were real. the ones that made you feel like maybe, just maybe, things could be different. but now, with everything laid bare, you realized it was never going to be the way you wanted.

you sighed and flicked the cigarette to the ground, watching it burn out as you leaned back against the railing. it was quiet here, just you and the world. it gave you space to breathe, to think. but still, your mind kept returning to heeseung. to the way he’d looked at you in the hallways before everything went south. to the way he used to make you feel seen. and even though you were angry at him, you still couldn’t shake the thought ‘maybe i miss him more than i should.’

you were lost in thought when the doorbell rang, snapping you out of your haze. no one ever came to your house except your dad, so the sound was unexpected. you walked to the top of the stairs to see who it was, but when you saw the butler let heeseung inside, your stomach dropped. what the hell was he doing here? after everything, after you cut him off. he still showed up. frustration hit you immediately, and you turned to leave, heading quickly to your room. but heeseung wasn’t giving up that easily. you heard his footsteps behind you as he called your name. "hey, wait!"

you didn’t stop. you just pushed harder to get to your door, slamming it behind you and locking it. but you knew he was still out there, still following you.

“please, can we talk?” he said softly through the door. you stood there, fists clenched, torn between wanting to scream and wanting to know why he couldn’t just leave you alone.

you hesitated for a moment, but you couldn’t bring yourself to leave him standing there. you unlocked the door and let him in, and he stepped inside, his gaze immediately scanning your room. it was quiet, almost sterile. nothing like the space you had shown him at your old place. there were no personal touches, no signs of the messy, chaotic you he’d seen before. it felt different. distant.

heeseung looked around, his eyes softening with something like regret, but before he could say anything, you snapped.

“you have no right to come back into my life like this, like you own the place!” you shouted, your voice shaking with anger. “after everything, after you- ugh! you can’t just show up here, acting like it’s nothing!”

he took a step back, clearly taken off guard by the intensity of your words. but you didn’t care. the frustration, the hurt. it all spilled out in a rush. “you didn’t fight for shit, heeseung! you never did. you just kept going back to karina and that made her destroy my life! so don’t come here now, thinking everything’s fine!”

his face tightened, but he didn’t speak. he just stood there, looking at you, trying to find the right words. but you couldn’t let him speak. not yet.

“you don’t get to do this,” you spat, your chest heaving. “you don’t get to just fix it after everything you’ve done.”

heeseung didn't say anything. he just stepped forward and pulled you into a kiss-fast, intense. you froze, feeling all the anger and frustration you'd built up dissolve in that moment. it wasn't gentle, it wasn't soft. it was his apology, his regret, all packed into one. you tried to push him away to keep talking, but he didn't let you. instead, his hand gripped your wrist, pushing you against the wall, and it made everything inside you twist. when he pulled back, his breath was heavy, eyes searching yours.

“i will cuss you out heeseung, for everything, maybe not just now,” you breathed out, making a small grin appear on his face.

his hands gently traced the contours of your figure as his gaze remained focused on you. he was tender, careful, his lips leaving soft, lingering touches, wanting you to remember only the feel of his kiss. "i've missed you so fucking much, you don’t even know…" he murmured, his thumb grazing your jaw. "me too," you replied softly, pressing your lips against his again.

his hands quickly went to the hem of your shirt, his experienced fingers peeling it shirt off your warm body, a small sigh leaving his lips as they trailed against your neck, leaving open mouthed kisses along it. your breathing got heavier as he sucked hard occasionally, very clearly trying to leave marks.

“fuck, slow down, i’m not going anywhere,” you let out a small breathy gasp, feeling his sharp teeth numbing on your skin, then his soft lips pressing against the spot, almost delicately. you moaned lightly as heeseung slid his knee between your thighs, feeling him smirk against your sensitive skin. “yeah, i know.”

heeseung then moved you both to the edge of your bed, gently letting you rest on your back, your head landing softly against the pillows, still very much aware of how much you needed his mouth back on your body.

he resumed to trailing kisses down your chest, through every single line of dark ink on your body, until he reached the hem of your shorts, looking up at you with those dark doe eyes, that drowned in need. “just relax, can you do that for me?” heeseung slowly started to take off your bottoms, as you sighed out “uh-huh.” he pulled them down your legs, throwing them away from your sight.

“just like that,” he slipped his hand through your white laced underwear causing you to shudder. as his soft fingertips brushed against your cunt. your chest immediately tensed feeling his index and middle finger rub down your clit, your wetness coating his fingers.

heeseung captured your lips into a hungry kiss, distracting you for a small second as he pushed two fingers deep inside of you, reaching up. but soon enough, he had you gasping for air against his mouth, as he moved them quicker, his thumb pressing against your clit, sending a warm feeling through your body.

your hand gripped the soft silk sheets, the other on his shoulder, feeling him so deep inside. your hips buckled unconsciously, wanting to get even closer to him. “fuck,” you whispered, dryly moaning, getting the overwhelming sense of cumming start building up.

heeseung kissed the corner of your mouth one time, before going down on you, his hot tongue leaving a wet trail against your skin, and then he replaced his thumb, sucking on your swollen clit, while his fingers still worked their way into you. his eyes observed how you reacted, almost as if hunting you down. it all felt too much, many sensations at the same time, they had you struggling with your words in between moans, as the knot inside your stomach tightened but quickly gave up, “fuck, ‘seung- mhmm, i’m gonna-“ you whimpered, feeling your legs start shaking, making heeseung go impossibly harder on you.

he fingered and sucked you until you came down your high, making sure to lick his fingers clean, not wanting to get your bed dirty, even if it would in a few seconds. you could feel him getting more hard, as he pressed his hips down against your plush thigh to get a bit of friction. a smirk spread across your mouth because you knew you were the reason why.

“come on, let me see your face, pretty girl,” he grabbed you with his other hand, turning your hot face towards him, almost grinning in victory when seeing your half lidded pinkish eyes, as if you were drunk from arousal and his touch. he bored into your face, as if looking at a piece of art, “you’re goddamn beautiful,” he uttered.

“yeah, i know,” you told him, making him laugh, while using your hands to unbutton his pants, starting to slide them off. heeseung noticed this, looking down at your actions then back up at you with a smirk, “and you’re telling me to slow down,” he said with a devilish tone, helping you take off his clothes, ever so slowly, torturing you with the time.

you threw him a warning look, as he propped up, still on top of you, and took off his shirt as well, letting you see his slightly tanned skin, clear of any love bites that soon would coat him. heeseung hovered over your body, watching intently how he deeply buried himself inside of you. he wouldn’t let you do any of the work, it was going to be him.

you felt him pulsate inside of you, your walls stretching out for him due to his size. it was almost painful to feel too full at once. heeseung was trying not to go crazy over how warm and tight your were, suppressing the need to fuck you with everything he had here and now, before starting to move slowly. he went as deep as he could, and once you got used to the feeling of his dick inside you, heeseung started thrusting in roughly, enough to send spams through your heat, to your body.

“fuck, you’re so good for me,” heeseung groaned, and he took advantage of your position under him to make particularly strong thursts, tightening his grip on your waist, his expression full with desire for more, to get lost in you. and your face didn’t make it better, you looked so needy and high from him at the same time, it made him want to fuck you endlessly, and lose control.

his hips kept slamming with yours mercilessly, and you felt yourself aching, wanting to cum once again, letting out a loud inevitable moan. heeseung was pressed by your walls, as he approached his edge soon, taking the moment to pound into you quickly, almost making himself a whining mess.

you whimpered into his mouth due to the overstimulation he caused you with his thrusts, a knot ran through your legs and you didn't know how much longer you could resist, you felt unbelievably full from him. your warm breath made him lose even more concentration, as he mindlessly came inside of you, coating your insides, still throbbing and moving slowly into you.

when he finally stopped and cleaned you up carefully, heeseung dropped next to you, turning to watch your profile. he raised his fist, getting your attention, and you gave him an odd look before joining your own first with him in the middle in a fistbump, even if you felt like you were about to give away into sleepiness. “atleast that’s better than making stuff awkward,” you sighed, looking up at the ceiling, only dressed in your shirt and a new pair of underwear, feeling a small tug in your throat from being dry.

“hey, we need to get up, i was planning on taking you out,” heeseung said, poking your arm playfully. he couldn’t be serious, wanting you to leave the comfort of your bed after not being able to feel how to walk.

turning your body to your side, you looked out of the glass panel that was your window, noticing the sky get darker “you’re crazy, i’m not doing that right now, let me be,” the words left your mouth tiredly, groaning as you adjusted your position.

heeseung shook his head, hearing a small breath from you, telling him you were in already dream-land, way too far for him to get ahold of you. and he was sure it would always be like that, that he would be the one chasing you, and he didn’t mind, because after all the bad decisions, he was knew he could handle it, the bad reputation and everything that came in between.

BTW: this is saur embarrassing, if it doesn’t get atleast one note, i will delete my whole account istg. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 also, not proofread. i’m not reading all that stuff again. ew.

EXTRA:

masterlist.

[stressedoutcanary]

Hold On - Jason Todd x Batgirl!Reader [PART 2]

WORD COUNT :- 2.3k

Warnings ⚠️: I don't even know if there are any...Swearing maybe?, mentions of kidnappings, actual kidnapping oh and also violence and angst :)

A/N 😋: I got lost while writing this so judge accordingly people. Also forgive me for any mistakes. I TRIED.

Part 1 , Part 3

•°•°•°•°

“JASON STOP!!!!!”, your voice echoed in the silent warehouse.

Jason stopped in his tracks as soon as he heard your voice, his mind was brimming with thoughts, questions and worst of all, emotions.

“Well, well, well, look who crawled out of her little cave”, He said smugly as he finally turned around to face you. The voice was his, you’d recognize that voice anywhere but it felt cold, devoid of emotions, hearing him like that sent a shiver up your spine. You could feel your determination slipping.

Even though you had your cowl on, Jason could still see how much his rampage was hurting you but he couldn’t stop now, not when all he had left to do was to capture Joker, beat the living shit out of that asshole and show Bruce how much of a failure Batman’s moral compass really is.

“Well? Got nothing to say now?... Why am I not surprised?”, Jason scoffed.

You took a deep breath, you were breaking down inside but you sure as hell weren’t going to let that stop you. You spoke, voice barely above a whisper,  “Jason...Jay...Stop all this...Please, come home, come back to the--”

“Manor? Home? Did you hit your head (Y/N)? Why in the hell would I ever go back to a place where NOBODY GAVE A DAMN ABOUT ME, WHERE HE REPLACED ME AS IF I MEANT NOTHING?!”, Jason didn’t want to lose control of himself, not in front of you. So with visible effort he calmed himself down, took a step forward and gave you a deadpan look.

“You all left me”

Your blood boiled at that statement.

“How dare you?! We lost you! We mourned for you! I mourned for you!”

Tears welled up in your eyes, listening to him you wondered whether he truly believed the words actually coming out of his own mouth.

“The Jason I knew was a roughed up street boy who still cared when many didn't, who called Bruce out every step of the way, who had this ridiculous favoritism for bread, who had the guts to take out a tire from the fricking Batmobile”, despite the dreadful situation you smiled remembering those sweet memories.

You looked him in the eye, pleading in a way, and you spoke softly, “The Jason I knew was The Robin to my Batgirl. This-this is just not who you are Jay, not really...So can you just stop?”

He looked unfazed by your words and cocked his head to the side.

“Princess, the only way you can stop me is if you fight me, knock me down real hard, make sure that I won't get back up again. Tell me Batgirl, can you do it? Do you actually have what it takes?”, he waited for an answer he knew wasn’t coming. As expected, all he was met with was silence.

Long, Painful Silence.

With that Jason knew what he had to do, he put on his red helmet and swung out of the nearest window, you couldn't stop him, for all your big talk, you just couldn't. He was right you failed him.

•°•°

You jumped awake with a start, bolting upright and immediately regretting your subconscious decision, the throbbing pain made you clutch the back of your head with your palm and you closed your eyes again to achieve some semblance of reality as a way of grounding yourself.

‘It was just a dream (Y/N)…just...a...dream’

You tried to lie to yourself knowing deep down that it was a memory, something you have already lived through, something you regret everyday. You swallowed the lump in your throat. It felt dry and your whole body was sore. You really should've called in early and then maybe Dick would've been the one stuck in this crapy situation and not you.

Pushing past your perplexed state you got up and took in your surroundings, there were vines hanging from the open roof, a LOT of flowers and some Venus flytraps by the corner. It wouldn’t even take being a detective to figure out where you were; The Botanical Gardens.

“How the hell did I end up here”, you muttered under your breath. This was getting out of hands.

“See Pammy I told ya Girl-Bat would rise and shine by now”

“I can see that Harls”

‘Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn, just great, is nobody in Arkham these days’

The duo descended down from the open roof through one of the vines and stood in front of you. Harley looked as happy as a 10 year old about to get their favorite toy and Ivy seemed to be interested in anything and everything that did not concern you. Classic.

“Why the hell did you both kidnap me?”

You jumped forward and grabbed Harley by the collar of her dress, in retrospect it wasn't the best move but it's not like you were thinking straight at the time anyway.

A vine wrapped itself around your waist and you were tugged back by such force that you were sure there was gonna be a big bruise there tomorrow. You skidded across the floor and finally stopped when your back connected with a bench. You were just too drained to fight back so instead you just crawled up and sat on the bench with a grunt.

‘Not fighting my way out of this one so for once let’s try talking’

“Whoa, should ya really be this obnoxious when ya got a concussion?”, Harley burst your thought bubble as she looked you over.

“Wait, Did you just call me obnoxious?!”

“But don'tcha worry I am a doctor and I got a PhD”

“In psychology!”

“I will fix ya in no time”

“Are you even listening to me?”

Just like that you saw Harley leave the room to go get some medical supplies, or well at least you thought that that's what she was going to do, you turned your face towards Ivy hoping that she can fill in the blanks.

“So you both finally done babbling? And here I thought it was never going to end.”, She looked at you from where she was petting her plant, and made her way over to you, something about her seemed genuine. You got the feeling that whatever she had to say, it won't be a lie.

“Try and not mind what Harley does, she's just happy to make new friends for girls night.” She sighed before continuing, “As for your question, last night we were near the Gotham Central Park when we saw a masked man dragging your unconscious body out of a building and into a van parked in the alley, so we kil-- we took care of him and brought you here”, She shrugged as if that explains why the Poison Ivy just saved your life.

"Wait that means Red isn't here", you whispered more to yourself than to others.

“Pam is Red!”, Harley said cheerfully as she came back out nowhere with a bunch of boxes which would've made you very uneasy if your mind wasn't already preoccupied.

“What Harley means to say is that if you are trying to ask about that gun loving leather jacket vigilante who wears a red helmet, then no we don't know where he is”

Her words sunk in and yesterday's memories flashed in your mind, your eyes widened under your mask as the realization hit you like a bus.

The missing people, the creepy mannequins, the medical journals regarding surgeries, the weirdo in the white mask instead of a face, the poster of some Pretty Dolls parlor; Now it all makes sense!

“Pyg!”

"Huh?", the women in front of you almost jumped at your sudden revelation.

“Lazlo Valentin aka Professor Pyg that's the son of a bitch who is behind all this mess, he's the one who has got Red Hood And it's all my fault! Now, He might be dead already! I should've known, I-I should've figured it out quicker, I should've done something, DAMN IT!!”, you buried you face in your hands due to the building frustration within you.

“Don't be like that”, you heard Harley's voice as a hand was placed on your shoulder, she sat down on the bench next to you, you turned your head and eyed her warily, seeing nothing but concern.

“Don't give up. Clearly this Hoodie person means a lot to ya so you get off your ass and go get him, don't you Bat People always find a way”, you looked at her for a moment, then jumped up on your feet.

“Can't believe I am saying this but you are right Harley, I need go and I will find a way to save him, but before leaving I wanna know something”, you looked Ivy in the eyes as you worded your next sentence, “Why save me?”

“It was just my way of replaying you for saving Harls from that clown once”, instead of elaborating Ivy just crossed her hands over her chest waiting for you to leave. You gave her a warm smile, something they are not used to seeing, from a bat of all people.

“Thank you Pamela”

With that you were out of that detour and onto finding the path leading up to Jason.

•°•°

Somehow you reached the safe house without running into some kind of trouble, with how your day has been going, you were completely expecting something else to go wrong. Thankfully it didn't. You took out a spare comms unit, keys for your bike and some aspirin to dull the headache.

Soon you were whizzing past vehicles at full speed triying to contact anyone available at the moment.

“Come on pick up, pick up, pick up! What's the meaning of giving us an emergency button when no one picks the damn thing up”, you spoke into a dead line, wishing you could just bang your head against a wall, on second thought not a good idea.

Two minutes later the call was finally picked up and a screen appeared on the dash of your bike, it was from the batcave and you could see Dick, Damian and Bruce in sitting in front of the computer, Tim was connected from what you assumed to be the titans tower. However Dick was the first one to pop the question.

“(Y/N) what's the emergency? Are you okay? We haven't heard from you since last night”

“Look no time to explain. Jason's been taken by Pyg and I need you guys to give me a location. Now”, you said gritting your teeth as you narrowly missed a truck for the second time this evening.

“Todd's captured? *tt* his incompetence precedes that of Drake”, Damian's snarky remark made Tim snap his head up.

“Hey!”

“Boys”, Bruce's stern voice made them quiet enough for the time being, “Batgirl you are injured and your emotions can compromise the whole rescue, go back to the safe house and let us handle this”, Bruce ended the transmission and it made you angry.

'He said that they are going to handle it, that means they know where he is, so now all I have to do is to get Dick to spill it out'

You dialed Dick back, hoping he would understand what you are trying to do.

“I know why you specifically choose to call me back and No I am not letting you go head first into danger without any of us with you especially when you are compromised”, Dick's tone was stern but laced with concern.

“Dick the last time Bruce said he will handle it, Jason died, look I know what he is trying to say, I get him, I can't blame him for wanting to look after me but you have to understand I have to be the one to get him back”

“Why?!”

“Because I can't lose him again! The last thing that I said to him was that I might never forgive him! Never forgive him for something that's not even his fault! You are my only hope at getting him back, please don't take that away from me, please”, you pleaded with him as you slowed down the bike to a stop.

The line was silent for a while, the thought about saying more to him crossed your mind; what you are feeling about Jason, how much he matters to you, how you've failed him more than once, but ultimately decided against it and instead you just waited for his reply.

You deflated as soon as you realized that the line was cut but the ping of a notification caught your attention; The map to the possible location of Jason.

“Dick Grayson, you big softie”, you smirked, your bike roared as you made your way on to the free way heading fast towards the Gotham outskirts.

Meanwhile at Professor Pyg's 'supervillain headquarters' :

Jason slowly woke up, assessing the situation he quickly came to the conclusion that he messed up and now he is tied up to what seems like dentist's chair.

“Great, there has got to be a new record I've set in this family for messing up and getting kidnapped”, Jason muttered under his breath, he tried to tug at his restraints to get free but it turned out to be fruitless. A blinding light was switch on above him and he grunted due to the intensity.

“Man, what is up with you people and light?! Turn it off already!”, Jason said as he tried to adjust his eyes accordingly, when he came to, he was met with his captor himself.

Jason just stared at the man in front, moving towards him, wearing a pig mask and holding a butcher knife. He has seen enough crazy but this guy might just rival the Joker himself.

“Pyg know you broken. Pyg make you perfect”

“WHAT THE F--”

°•°•°•°•

(I like to think I am funny)

Cute little extra note: Yes it is the second time I'm leaving you guys hanging and NOPE I do not regret my decision.

Tagging: @ladyperceval

[babiesdreams]

hi! i love your writing and im 100% sure you’ll be a writer in the future! never give up💘 for my request can i request mark lee x female reader doing the candy kiss challenge ? like with the lollipops?? if u don’t know what i mean look it up on youtube it should make sense. thanks again!!

I’m- thank you soo much baby. If I ever get a book out, I’m gonna leave some clues so that you know It’s me.

Also, I put this photo of myself bc I did a whole photoshoot and they’re aesthetic, sooo here they are.

23 nights with nct

Imma make this Mark’s night. Soo Day 21: Mark

“Kiss, Kiss” +18 Mark Lee

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol

Everyone was hyping you two. The challenge was purely innocent, so like there was nothing wrong with it. Except that it was Mark Lee, It was him who you had to kiss, his lips would be on yours. 

Just the thought of it, makes you blush, but when his lips start eating the poki... You lose it. Your eyes close slowly and after a few seconds you feel his soft skin brushing your lips.

A warm sensation brushes your whole body, making you feel like you were flying. Even if it only was a split second, you lived it on slowmo. You swear It felt like you had been hours kissing him, yet it didn’t feel like enough.

When you open your eyes you can see his face, all blushy and soft. His eyes are widen and soft at the same time, as his gaze is just lost in the highlights of your face. Your hair makes a perfect picture out of your face. 

You both end up looking at each other for the rest of the night, getting lost on each other’s shiny eyes. Even when everyone left you still looked into each other. For both of you, the room has always been empty, just the two of you in there.

Mark suddenly breaks the silence in the room. “Do you... You know um.... Do you ...” He says stuttering. “Do I...?” You try to help him but he chuckles. “Wait. Um like... Do you like me and that stuff?” He asks scratching his head.

You furrow your brows and laugh. “Why?? You liked my lips?” You ask teasingly and he looks at you with a daring gaze. “I like you. Since before that stupid challenge” He says, making you gasp at the sudden confession.

“I guess I like you too” You say looking away, trying to hide your blushed cheeks. His body crwls over yours, his hand touches your chin, making you look at him before he kisses you softly.

This kiss is completely different from the previous one. You’re still flying at the feeling, butterflies tickling your stomach and his hand brushing your skin softly. His tongue and yours get into a heated dance, exchanging saliva. 

His hands soonly get below your skirt, touching your clothed clit, making circles around it. You can’t control whimps and tiny moans to get out of your mouth. His hands moving over your clothed cunt feel somewhat very dirty.

“You’ve been wanting this all night right?” He says with a deep and serious voice, which makes you gulp. “Right?” He repeats, moving faster over your clit. You simply nod as the only thing that could get out of your mouth were moans.

Your moans and his growls are all that can be heard in the empty room...

------------------

It took me a long time to write this cause I’m getting ticks due to my anxiety :c

I’m sorry to leave it like this :CC May continue this someday TT

Masterlist –requests open– How to request?  Check out your score.

[llamakenma]

a ‘i miss you’ fanfic

request:  can I request a hinata angst again? Where he walks in on his s/o and kags in a weird position so hinata thinks that his s/o was cheating even tho in reality it was a huge misunderstanding and hinata says so many mean things he doesn’t mean to kags and his s/o and people end up finding out and they bully y/n so y/n moves away to uhh any other school and then yams explains that y/n never cheated and now hinata is like conflicted and wants to make it right buts it’s too late and he can’t find her or her new school

--------------------------------------

note: hi @shoyosbitchh!!! it’s totally fine to request again and thank you for requesting!!! i had a fun time writing this and I hope you will have a fun time reading this! stay safe and take care!! p.s i really loved the picture by the way! and im so sorry for the delay TT .

summary: where y/n leaves

--------------------------------------

‘sho.. it’s not what it looks like.’

you pushed off kageyama as fast as you could, pulling his arms off your side , running towards the person who you hoped was the last that could've seen this. you could tell what he was thinking and you prayed that he would believe what you had to say. it was not what he thought it was. and it was definitely not something you would even try out.

‘sho... please, it’s not what you think it is. hear me out...’

you were desperate. this shouldn’t be something that is going to end your relationship of 3 years, no, it shouldn’t be over some misunderstanding and you were willing to make him understand. you were willing to tell him what had actually happened and resolve all of this without tears. 

you reacted to the flinch he gave, as you tried to reach out to him, attempting to make him listen to what you had to say. or you tried to. before you could even comprehend, he had already yelled a string of words you wish you never heard- especially not from him. 

you could not believe the words he had actually muttered. no you couldn’t. it took a couple of pinches and reality kicking you in the gut to remind you that he was not the same person you loved. the hinata standing in front of you was a complete stranger to the person you knew- at least you thought you did, or you hoped you did. no, the person that stood in front of you had a murderous glint in his eyes, and he looked ready to rip you apart at any moment. 

‘go on, where’s your explanation. shouldn’t you be spilling lies after lies instead of standing there like an innocent little girl.’

you dared not to speak. you dared not to even say a word. the same look he maintained in his eyes was enough to make you freeze in your spot and forget all that had happened. you knew you were desperate yet... yet, the fact that he doubted you so much. the fact that he refused to even hear you out- hear what you had to say- made you reconsider actually explaining everything to him. it was not like he was going to believe what you had to say. it was not like he was going to comfort you and say he’s sorry. to say you were disappointed at how much he lied to have faith in you, how much he poured sweet words of trusting you, you knew it was only a cut above to not even utter a word about the real thing.

‘yes shoyo. what you saw was real.’.

---

‘did you hear? they cheated on hinata?’

‘i know right. how could they do that? hinata’s such an angel’

‘they are such a slut, shoyo’s better of without them’

it had been a good week since you had the fight with hinata and none of you had made the effort to even talk to each other- you simply had no reason to and you were sure he didn’t too.

was the week miserable? very. apart from the fact that you no longer had friends apart from kageyama, every insult thrown at you without them actually knowing what had happened was annoying. you knew you shouldn’t let them get to you, but deep down you were taking every word personally- considering on if you were actually the one in the wrong- were you a slut just like they had mentioned? were you losing hinata over our fault?

every word haunted you. it kept you up every night. it was this cycle of insomnia and failing grades that your family had took notice of- you were not fine at all. you had bags of darkness under you eyes, and your hair was never kept anymore. you started shutting yourself out- always staying in your room and not wanting to communicate had made your parents shiver in worry. they had no idea what had happened to you and they could only hope the news they could offer wouldn’t break you even more.

‘we’re moving (y/n).’

---

it had been a month since you and shoyo had a fight, and three weeks since he could not spot even a speck of you in any corner of school, in any corner of Miyagi. he knew he shouldn’t be worrying about you- especially not when you no longer thought about him, not when you no longer had a place for him. yet, he knew that he still longed from you- from every corner of his soul, and every part of his mind- he knew that all those nights he stayed up wishing he had at least hugged you that day, that at least he could’ve heard your voice even if it means another backlash. 

he was turning into a worrywart and his performance had levelled down- as he started skipping practice just to visit the places you used to go with him, wondering if you would be at least at one of those places, waiting for him with the eye- blinding smile on your face and call out for him. yet, you weren’t there, you weren’t in any of the places, he could even feel the presence he loved fading away- out of his reach. 

he couldn’t help anymore, he had to ask someone-anyone- at where you were at, where you had ran off to, where you had disappeared to. you had vanished into thin air in front of him, and he knew he could stand not holding you, but he could not stand not looking at you. he had not seen you and every part of him was itching- he was dying to even take a glance at you.

‘you didn’t know? she moved away hinata.’ 

‘what?’

yamaguchi was one of the people who knew what actually happened, he was one of the people that made an effort to reach out to you and demand an explanation for what had actually happened. he had always believed your relationship with hinata was one of those that would never end, especially not with the way you had smile at each other or the way you look at each other like there was nothing else in the world. he loved how you and hinata always managed to get cooped up in a world of your own when you were together- nothing else mattered to you. he would be a fool not to see how happy you were with him and how miserable you were without. anyone would be a fool not to see it and he could only conclude that everyone was indeed a fool. 

hinata shoyo was a fool. he was a fool to not make effort to listen to you. he was a fool to assume everything was what he believed to be. he was a fool to take you for granted and let you go. he thought you would be there- at least smiling in the hands of someone else. he thought you would be at least having the time of your life with kageyama who had tried not to hate for nothing. what was he thinking. 

he wanted to see you, to hug you and say that he was sorry- yet he did not even know where you were. he was reaching out to you just to get shut off, this was his fault he knew, yet was he really too late.

‘the number you have dialed is unavailable right now. please leave a message after the beep.’

[ilovebeing-weird]

Dickinette February

Day-1 Spell/Potion

First day of commitment, let's see how this goes. I don't know what I am writing. So let's wait and watch. Yayy!!

Marinette was stressing out. Why? Her boyfriend has turned into a baby. Curse the Scarecrow, he has created a new spell that de-aged people. Nightwing came into its contact while saving a civilian.

"It will take only one day to fade away, but we will try to speed the process as much as possible." Bruce or Batman told her. "Till then can you take care of him? Our house is not child friendly." That's true but what do you expect from a house full of vigilantes

"Please take him!! He saw your photo and won't stop crying!! We don't know how to take care of him!!" Red Robin told her almost crying himself.

*TT* "Take the heathen." Always the grumpy Robin told her annoyed. Nothing new there.

"We are not trained enough for this!!" Red Hood says pleadingly while the 5 year old Dick Grayson in his arms is crying and making grabby hands towards Marinette. It was a odd science, not only because he was a baby, also because he was sad and crying.

"Give him to me." She said looking at her boyfriend, she was the most adorable thing she has ever seen, and she has seen Tikki. His big blue eyes were glazed and his chubby cheeks. Marinette was going to die of cuteness.

"Awwww, aren't you the cutest thing ever." Mari said cooing over him and making him calm down instantly.

"I wissed ou." Dick said looking up in her eyes

"Okay we will leave him in your care, and start finding the solution." Batman said taking out his grappling hook as the younger vigilantes followed suit.

"Let's take you inside, shall we?"

It shouldn't be so difficult, she had taken care of kids before. It's true they were older but taking care of a five year old shouldn't more different or difficult.

Right?

Wrong!

That kid was extremely energetic and flexible and knew gymnastics. He loved to drain Marinette's energy. Marinette was tired to the bone. She finally sat him to eat. It will be easy now, except he was throwing a fit while eating.

"Dick, please eat it. I will give you candy after this." Hearing candy made his face light up. She knew how much her boyfriend loved sugar.

"Pawmise?"

"Yes, promise. Now eat it for me?" He nodded his head and ate whatever was on his plate. "Very good. Now as promised, here is your candy." After having his sugar, he was even more energetic, so that meant, no rest for Marinette.

"Let's do something!!"

"Okay, what do you wanna do?"

"Ooh, ooh, let's go out. To the zoo or....... The Zoo?"

"Fine let's go," She knew he loved the zoo. Their first date was at a zoo too. They tried freeing the animals, and almost succeeded if it wasn't for Batman. "but first we have to get you dressed accordingly." he was in a loose T-shirt. Mari was lucky that she was working on a toddlers clothing line.

"Buh, I like this. Smells like you."

"But you gotta wear something else if you wanna go out."

"Can't wear this?" He asked his eyes pleading. Damn it! How dare he be such cute, and have those big blue eyes that she can't deny to. But she has too so she uses the little courage left in her and finally says....

"No"

"Okay"

"Good boy Dickie, now I am gonna get you some new clothes and then we'll go to the zoo."

"Mari wook, I can do like this mokey!!" Dick said, dressed adorably in a bunny onesie.

"Really? show me!" She had no doubt that he could impersonate the monkey. There was nobody who could do it better.

"Yeah" Dick said trying to climb into the monkey's cage

"Dick, what are you doing!?" Marinette exclaimed lifting him in her arms

"If I wave to do like mokey, I weeb to get in. I weeb the bars to swing."

"No"

"Why" He said his eyes watering. Why God?!

"Because we don't want to disturb the monkeys"

"Ohhhh" Dick made an understanding face

"Yeah"

"Why are tey in the wage?"

"So people can see them"

"It's bad"

"Yeah, it's bad"

"Wemove them?" He asked cutely tilting his head to the side

"We can't"

"Why"

"Because...... We just can't"

"Oh"

"Yeah"

"Let's go?"

"Yeah, let's go"

"Mari"

"Hmm"

"I wanna mawwy you" Marinette smiled in return

"You do?"

"Yea"

"I wanna marry you too." It wasn't a lie, she wanted to, to the adult version of him of course. "When do you wanna get married"

"Tomowwow"

"So soon?"

"I wanna do it soon"

"Okay then, let's get married tomorrow"

After coming home she changed him into his T-shirt, which was way too big for him, but ge wore it without complaining.

"So did you like the zoo?" Marinette asked a sleepy Dick

"Yea, it was fun. You were ith me" Hearing those words made Marinette's heart fill with warmth. She went into flashback when he said those words on their third date.

-- Flashback --

"Do you like this? I knew that you didn't want something to fancy, so I went for something basic, if you don't like it we could do something else. Of course you don't like it, I mean-" Dick silences Marinette's rambling by a light peck on her lips

"I love it, I would love any place if you would be with me."

-- Flashback ends --

"I had fun too" From the side of her eye she saw him rubbing his eyes

"Let's get you to bed shall we?"

"Hmm" That's all he said before he passed out in her arms

"Why are you so cute" After putting him to bed, her phone rang

"Hello?"

"Hey Mari"

"Oh, hey Tim"

"We are so sorry we dumped a baby on you for almost a whole day. We hope that it wasn't much of a problem. Sorry, but we couldn't find a solution to change him back soon."

"It's okay Tim, it wasn't a problem at all. I was happy to spend a whole day with him. And take care of him."

"Are you sure, if you want we can take him back"

"It's okay Tim, I can take care of him. He is sleeping anyway."

"Okay then, call us if you need us"

"Sure, bye"

"Bye"

Dick felt warm, he was in pain but also warm.

"What" He saw his girlfriend beside him sleeping soundly, no worries of the world. "How did I come here? Not that I am complaining, but how?" Suddenly all the memories came rushing back to him. From how he became a baby, to how they went to zoo. He proposed!! He wanted to propose, but properly, with a ring, a speech.

"What happened, Dick? Dick!!" Mari jumped on to him happy to see him turned back into an adult. He hugged back with an 'oof'

"Hey"

"You, you need to be more careful. What if something happened, do you know how awful it would've been"

"I know, I know. I am sorry"

"It's okay. Do you need food?"

"Yes please"

"And please, wear some jeans"

@dickinette-february

[uwua3]

hi bunnie!!! i’m simping over juza again (but when am i not) so may i request some soft juza dating hc’s?? anything is fine 🥺👉👈 ilysm 💕

hi, mel~ ♡ i hope you’re doing well! :D i know you’re a fan of genshin impact, so i hope you enjoy this !!! <333 this isn’t as #Soft as i wanted, but i hope it makes you smile regardless 🥺 i love you lots !!! so does juza~ ´͈ ᵕ `͈ ♡°◌̊ (ahhh can you ever date a fatui harbringer though? hopefully some day TT)

summary: before juza leaves, he gives you a dream he will defend until the end

warnings: genshin impact spoilers(?), mentions of death

author’s note: no, i will not elaborate on why i have this extreme association of juza with childe. please do not ask me, as i will write *too much*. however, for any of my a3! genshin fans, please enjoy this piece for 11th fatui harbringer, hyodo juza! (there are no MAJOR spoilers for childe’s story—just his personality/family relations!)

+ i do NOT ship childe/traveller !!! childe is a young adult while traveller is canonically a teenager, i do not support the actual ship itself. please note juza is 18 in this writing :)

word count: 1,566

music: who are you, really? – mikky ekko, killer – the ready set

until we meet again, in snezhnaya.

🍁🍰 hyodo juza

They call Hyodo Juza, “Defender of Childhood Dreams”.

Because if you make a promise, you keep it. If you make a mistake, you apologize. If you give someone a dream, you defend it ‘til the end.

Despite always being away from his home country of Snezhnaya, Juza found himself keeping his word no matter where he went. As one of the older brothers of the Hyodo household, Juza could clearly remember his younger siblings’ tears as he departed all those years ago.

“Toymakers go all around the world for the best toys! I’ll send home lots of gifts, promise.” Juza swore on his life before disappearing away in the snow, wielding the emblem of the Fatui at eighteen.

“Brother Kumon, I will be home soon. I will take the first ship home, just as I promised—and you know how I always keep my promises.”

Yours faithfully, Your loyal knight

Juza sits in Liyue now, the ink staining the parchment against his will as he carefully signs his name. Gifts of all kinds sat beside him, such as kites, rattle drums, porcelain dolls, and snacks. After all, Juza did make a promise to send gifts. His younger brother, Kumon, deserved the best.

Before Juza could remember the chill of the snow down his spine and the numbing cold of frostbite he hadn’t felt in so long, the surface of his tea became unevenly rippled. At a distance, Juza could already tell it was you. Your rather odd companion, Paimon, could be sighted a mile away with how loud she was. On the other hand, you attentively listened as you stood out amongst the crowds.

Placing his quill down, Juza placed a pleasant smile upon his face. For a second, Snezhnaya disappeared. The frozen binding of his loyalty to her Majesty, the Tsaritsa, melted to reveal a heart longing for you to turn your head.

Even if it was for a moment, Juza’s head cleared of it all. His family waiting for him to conquer the world, his brother awaiting his latest toys, the expectation of laying all seven stars upon the Cryo Archon’s feet. All of it disappeared and all that was left was your face.

Honorary knight of Mondstadt. Hero that slayed Dvalin, or Stormterror. Lost twin looking for your sibling across Teyvat. You, a person from a different world, had made Juza forget why he had been fighting. Ever since he was fourteen, Juza fought tooth and nail just to survive. Now, Juza almost felt like he didn’t have to even move a finger as you met his eyes and returned his smile.

Juza would go through the abyss again, for three years even, to keep that smile.

When you walked over to his table of one, Juza lifted his hand in a wave as he called your name. Like you two were just friends, and nothing more. However, friends... wasn’t enough, not for Juza.

“Finally! My only worthy opponent, have you come for another fight?” Juza half-joked, his voice betraying his rumbling excitement and passion to be beaten once again. You always managed to gain the upper hand despite everything, and the rush of feeling like he was about to die gave him a thrill like no other.

But, you just shook your head as Paimon rolled her eyes, crossing her little arms mid-air. “Gosh, Juza, all you think about is fighting!” Juza held his hands up as if he surrended (he never actually would) and rested his hand on his spear, feeling the cool metal. Juza could imagine the electric sensation of his delusion, crackling for a fight regardless.

Only you could get him so worked up, Juza thought.

“No, I. . .” You trailed off, pausing to look away. The lowering sunset reflected in your eyes, like waves of Liyue’s harbor. Juza watched as your heart beat faster, uncertain, which was strange for such a renown legend in the making. Finally, you met his eyes with the confidence he knew and loved.

“I wanted to see you again before you left Liyue.” You honestly admitted and Juza let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. The bustling merchants of the city of contracts continued to thrive around the two. Carts of many merchandises wheeled past them, children ran by making up fantasies beyond the ocean, and business never stopped as trade went on and on. This was Liyue at its finest, and Juza was sure he’d miss it. Or, more specifically, you.

“Really? Perhaps I’ll have to take you home to my family one day. In the snowy hills where everything is cold.” Juza spoke like he was telling a story, as if he was speaking to Kumon back in their one-room hut. As if the snowflakes were in their hair, gloves keeping their hands functional, and makeshift fire was burning weakly between them. You seemed to change, posture weakening as if you were... safe.

You relaxed and didn’t have that subconscious to fight, not when you were with Juza. While you and Juza were two opposite ends of the spectrum, you two had one similarity that bound you together: being born into a life where fighting was the only option. Your hand that always hovered above your weapon fell to your side, and you took a seat across from Juza.

Juza, eleventh Harbringer of the Fatui, feared by all for his chaotic wild card battles. Yet, here he was, writing back home and drinking tea with a traveller who had done the impossible. You made him feel like putting down his weapons and running away, you made him want a second chance at life. As long as it was with you. Only you.

“Snezhnaya... tell me about it.” You said and Juza’s fingers twitched. Visions flew by his mind rapidly, mostly unpleasant and hard to speak of at a place like this. Juza wouldn’t dare tell you about the droughts of hunger when the war left the people to fend for themselves, the iced-over corpses serving as markings in the mountains, nor the everlasting pine trees that spoke of disaster with each collapse. Juza couldn’t say it, not when you were looking at him so wholeheartedly.

“My favorite thing to do is ice-fishing.” Juza started and launched into a whirlwind of his number one hobby. Spoke of the early morning hours cutting holes into thick layers of ice, wobbly legs shaking on the large expanse of the frozen lake, and sitting in silence as wildlife swam beneath them. Juza told you about the spike of adrenaline when he could feel the ice crack haphazardly, the jagged splits uncommon but exciting every time. When Juza shared his most beloved memories, he couldn’t help but feel the Snezhnayan cold with the closest possible feeling to joy.

You listened once again, face pensive and eyes focused on Juza’s hand motions, content tone, and honesty above all. You could almost see the nameless lake, the snow banks, the shadows of fish. You exhaled, and despite the warm atmosphere of Liyue, you swore you could see your breath solidify as if it was Dragonspine.

When Juza closed off his story with a smile, you spoke without a care in the world. As if your sibling wasn’t missing. As if you didn’t have to find all seven archons. As if the fate of Teyvat wasn’t upon your shoulders. Right now, it was just you and Juza. Juza and you.

“When I come to see you in Snezhnaya, I want to have your best fish dish.”

Juza propped his elbow upon the table, before holding his pinky out. You took it with your own, and Juza shot you a wink of many unsaid words. A contract, if you will. Fitting for Liyue.

“It’s a promise. You know I always love testing my limits for my opponents.”

If you make a promise, you keep it.

Juza pulled back first, as he always did. Standing up, Juza paid the bill generously with his excessive Mora. The words “goodbye” left a spicy taste on his tongue, so Juza refused to say them. You two held each other’s gaze for a moment too long, but didn’t mention it.

“I’m sorry for leaving you so soon.”

If you make a mistake, you apologize.

You didn’t react immediately, you just nodded as if it was okay. It wasn’t, really. You both knew Juza’s sudden departure was shrouded in unknown mystery. Neither of you had the courage to properly address it, however.

“But, I’ll see you again. I promised, didn’t I?” Juza began walking away, knowing he was due to leave and run far, far away to his next assignment. Liyue had no place for him anymore. Even when the stars of Teyvat claimed there would always be a place for adventurers, Juza wasn’t so sure if they meant him as well.

All you wanted to do was run after him. Sprint towards Juza and make him stay, even though he never would. You wanted to stand up and weave through the crowds to see his back one last time. But, you didn’t. You didn’t want to make this harder on yourself than it already was.

Before Juza disappeared for a long, long time, he looked over his shoulder with a wave.

“Farewell, my friends. Until we meet again... in Snezhnaya.”

If you give someone a dream, you defend it ‘til the end.

[pl-panda]

Damienette arranged marriage: part 19

Credits: Miraculous Ladybug team for the elements I take from MLB show. DC for their characters, @ozmav for the AU, @maribat-archive for giving me access to so many different stories to have take inspirations from, @thyladyanput for idea for Chat Damian and me for the plot.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

Part 9 Part 10 Part 11

Part 12 Part 13 part 14

part 15 part 16 Part 17

Part 18

Damienette arranged marriage: part 19

NEXT

----------------------------

“Will do madam.” The young Wayne actually smiled. He always respected Cass and was happy that maybe the girl would find some of her family. 

The happy atmosphere was broken when suddenly Talia crashed the chair she was tied to and freed herself.

“You are all in. So. Much. Trouble!” She spat through clenched teeth. 

--------------------------

Damian, Marinette and Sabine all got into battle stance. Talia was furious, but she didn’t attack immediately. 

“I was never before humiliated like that!” 

“I don’t know Mother. I would say when you run into Deathstroke’s trap it was pretty close.” Damain gave her sarcastic grin. 

“You… You… Stupid child!”

“That’s the best you can come up with?” Marinette smiled. “Tikki! Spots on!” 

In a flash of pink light transformation occurred and Ladybug was combat ready. Damian held his hand close to the sword and Sabine only smiled.

“Each of us could take you out alone mother. What makes you think you stand any chance?”

Talia’s gaze shifted between the three. Her muscles tensed and she still prepared to jump. Instinctively, Damian moved a bit to the left to be able to protect Marinette (not that she needed). Suddenly another chair crashed on Talia’s head. Almost immediately her eyes rolled back and she fell unconscious. Behind her stood Tom with what remained of the chair.

“Nobody hurts  my  family.” Tom stated adamantly. He then dropped what he held and walked back to Sabine and Marinette and pulled them in a bear hug. Damian just stood there awkwardly before Tom looked at him expectantly. “I may not like you yet, but you are still part of out family now. Come here!” A bit reluctantly, Damian approached the baker who quickly pulled him into the hug as well. The young Wayne wanted to protest just for a moment, but he quickly embraced the hug in the end. It felt nice. He actually liked the warm feeling. 

When they separated, Damian still stood there awkwardly. “I… I will go call father and ask about Cass.”

“Yes. And I will go call my  sister. ” Sabine stormed from the room reminded about what was on agenda before Talia decided to make a show of herself. Marinette detransformed and helped her father tie the assassin lady better. Once Damian finished the call he also helped and made sure she could not escape. A pair of magnetically locked cuffs helped greatly. 

Sabine returned to the room less than happy, but also no longer so furious. “At least Sandra didn’t try to lie her way out. She admitted to everything. She even apologized.”

“Lady Shiva… apologized?” Damian asked bewildered.

“I told you she was a sweety.” Sabine said it like it was most common knowledge in the world. Damian was about to leave when Sabine stopped him. “Would you mind staying for a moment? I want to talk with you alone.”

Marinette and Tom took the clue and left the room. Damian was a bit unsure what to do, but his mother-in-law pointed to the place on the couch next to her.

“Um… What you wanted to talk about Ma’am?” He asked, no longer fooled by her warm smile. He was certain that this woman could very well kick his ass any moment she wanted. And she was his mother-in-law and he did not want to piss her off. 

“What are your plans for my daughter. You two are married, but what next?” She asked bluntly. 

“I wish to be with her. I am willing to work with her to make it work.” He answered honestly. Sabine nodded, still with her smile on, and motioned him to continue. “I didn’t choose this either, but I… like Marinette and want to make her happy.” Damian hated talking about his feelings. He rarely did it even with family, much less with any strangers. 

“I can see you are Talia’s child. She was never an outspoken one either.” Sabine commented.

“tt. No ma’am. I am my father’s son.” Damian couldn’t help but feel irritated. He hated when someone compared him to his mother. He spent last five years trying to cut himself off from her. She was evil and manipulative. He didn’t want to be like that. He chose to follow his father, not her. 

“Bruce Wayne, right? Batman.” 

“Yes.” After that there was silence. Both of them waited for the other to start/continue. 

“Okay. Since I can see you are tired after the day, I will make it short.” Sabine finally concluded. “If you ever hurt Marinette, not even your father will find the body.” For just a moment, her smile disappeared and Damian shivered involuntary. She would go forward on her threat and make it happen. 

“If I do hurt her Ma’am, then you can do what honor demands.” He answered cautiously. 

“Great. And you can just call me Sabine. We are family now.” She returned to her normal smile.

--------------------------

Next day, Marinette came to school a bit earlier than usual (that is she was not late). In the back Damian waited for her with her notebook open. On the other back desk sat Chloe and sent her a smile that somehow unnerved the bluenette. She was planning something. Then, Marinette noticed that Damian had the same smile. 

Lila of course was babbling the same lies as usual. “Oh, My Damiboo is so sweet. I am sure that once we go to Gotham he will propose to me. We will both be sixteen so it’s legal. My mother won’t mind and Bruce loves me like a daughter anyway.” She grinned as her group of followers ohed and ahed at her.

“Actually…” Damian chimed in from the back of the class, “I heard that Damian Wayne is betrothed to none other than MDC. Apparently he was tired of this little game of yourse. Gotham is buzzling with this gossip.”

“As if!” Alya shouted. “Nobody would choose some other girl over Lila.”

“You are ridiculous! Utterly Ridiculous!” Chloe started like her usual self. “Use this half of the braincell you have left and think. Of course Damian would not wait for Lila forever. He just decided to find someone who would stay with him in america instead of traveling the world.”

“How dare she! It was Lila who introduced MDC to Jagged stone. If not for her that designer would be nothing.” Rose screamed.

“Maybe she just took the chance and moved to gotham to be closer to Jagged Stone.”

“But MDC is still...” Alix started and suddenly realization dawned on her. She finally connected the dots. From there, she realized more and more. It was like she woke up from some trance. Image of utter fear and regret on her face was priceless. “ No… “

Alix run out of class just as madame bustier entered. 

——————————————————————————————————–

Taglist (sorry if I missed you)@pheonixashtree @sassakitty @unabashedbookworm @vixen-uchiha @maggiecc12 @actualdisasterwoman @tired-butterfly @shizukiryuu @floralfi @imanerddealwith @northernbluetongue @krispydefendorpolice @toodaloo-kangaroo @dast218 @bluesoulblueheart @theatreandcomicfreak @disneyfoxuniverse @mindfulmagics @alwaysnumberonetruth @nyaabinch @jardimazul @lenamau @rosep16 @dramatic-squirrel @sonif50 @daminett4life @lulutheawkwardess @weird-pale-blonde-person @mooshoon @jeminiikrystal @mochegato @moonlightstar64 @dragonflyswing @silverwhiteraven @shamefullove @magic-miraculous @valeks-princess @heaven428 @mlbchaosqueen @winter-gardenflower @spicybelladonna @emo-elaine13 @vetilora @karukofox21 @my-name-is-michell  @sturchling @lokiifriggasonn @redscarlet95 @melicmusicmagic @interobanginyourmom @the-fusionist @razzledazzle247 @miss-mysterys-blog @darkthunder1589 @i-is-mysterious @catthhay @the-one-woman-army @zestyzealot @dahjokester @write-for-your-life2 @mermaidreject @peachedpocky @sassakitty @dahjokester @crazylittlemunchkin @novicevoice @justafanwarrior @eliza-bitch @schrodingers25 @tired-butterfly @toodaloo-kangaroo @redscarlet95

[krispydefendorpolice]

The Demon’s Bride (7)

So Here’s the next chapter of Demon’s Bride. I’m gonna try to finish my ficlet the Miraculous Awakens and add an update to Miraculous Future before doing another Demon’s Bride update.

I’m also trying a new method of taglist. I love that people enjoy my story and want to be tagged but the list got really long really fast. (I think by the time I had the third chapter/first ficlet out it was a full list). Unfortunately this meant a lot of the readers who had longer comments about things they enjoyed or questions in the story (things that keep me motivated to write!) wouldn’t get a tag. So I’m redoing the taglist. Some will keep changing because except for a select few that got me started in the cursed Daminette ship (god I love you people) everyone is gonna be kind of flexible. Meaning your name might get bumped in the next update.

I do try to tag these stories with (The Demon’s Bride) and (The Betrothed AU) let me know if there’s another tag I can add to make finding them easier. Believe me I know the struggle of trying to find out if a writer has updated.

One person suggested I cross post on AO3 and since I finally got an account let me know what you think. Not just would you read it but would this story be something you would download to save a copy? I do that with all my favorite works on that site and would consider it to be the biggest of compliments.

Okay, thank you all for enjoying this story. Thank you for being patient while I work out my own tag list system. Enjoy the next chapter

Beginning Previous Next Masterpost

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The next morning the class ate breakfast in the hotel breakfast lounge. It was large enough that they could break into their two groups but not so large that Marinette’s group could ‘accidentally’ get left behind.

Marinette rolled her eyes as she listened to Lila continuing her stories from the day before about meeting the youngest Wayne and how ‘It was love at first sight’.

“Damian is just such a sweetheart. It nearly broke my heart to have to put our relationship on hold when mama got her assignment in Paris. But I am happy she did as I got to meet all of you. And now I have a chance to see my Damian again.”

Lila smiled slyly as she leaned closer to her slaves, “In fact, we have plans to see each other tonight. He’s going to take me on a romantic dinner date. If you can keep it a secret from Ms Bustier I’d be ever so grateful. I don’t think she’d like it if I did something by myself but I’ll just never have a chance like this again.”

Marinette had a feeling she’d strain a muscle at some point before the end of the trip, either from rolling her eyes too hard or from fighting back the urge to roll her eyes. She’d have to somehow arrange for Lila to be supervised if she actually made it out of the hotel and more than likely that duty would fall on her as her usual alternatives were in Paris.

A glance at Juleka showed that the girl was already anticipating Marinette’s thoughts and would be taking on the supervising (stalking, call it what it is) duty for Marinette. Fortunately, continued training and practice during Akuma attacks had refreshed skills instilled by the league to readiness in both girls.

“No worries girl. We got your back, unlike some people,” Alya said with a pointed glance at Marinette. Alya had blamed Marinette when her relationship with Nino fell apart and once Marinette had stopped responding to her phone messages Alya had made it her personal mission to blame the worlds evils upon Marinette.

Marinette ignored them and kept typing on her phone.

“You guys are so trustworthy. I don’t know what I’d do without you guys,” Lila smiled at them.

“Class finish up your meals we need to meet the bus outside in five minutes for us to head to the mall,” Ms Bustier called.

“Hey Nino, I forgot a jacket up in my room. I’ll catch you at the bus,” Marinette said nonchalantly as they cleaned up their dishes.

“You’re planning something,” he stated. A raised brow dared her to deny it.

“Not at all. Just have Markov do a recording would you?”

“Sure, sure. But you’re reporting this, not me.”

“Done,” Marinette agreed as she headed back to the elevators. On the ride up she pulled out her phone and sent a quick text.

M: Meet me outside the hotel? I might need a ride.

D: Why? Are you safe?

M: I’m fine right now. But if things play out like they usually do I’m gonna need a ride

D: got it

Grabbing the bike jacket she’d left on her bed Marinette hurried outside the hotel. The bus’s engine was just starting to rev when she called out.

“Wait. I’m here,” she called and ran towards the bus.

It slowed for a moment before picking up speed and taking off. Marinette watched as it drove off and shook her head. She pulled out her phone and dialed a number.

“Bonjour Commandant,” she said cheerily before he did more than greet her.

He sighed, “What happened?”

“I might of made a stop in my hotel room this morning to get my jacket before meeting the rest of the class at the bus.”

“And you were left behind again?”

“I was left behind again,” she confirmed. “I was nearly at the bus and called out for them to wait. It started to slow but then took off again. There were open windows and Nino should have Max and Markov making another recording.”

“I’ll wait for the files. You know we’re going to have to report this when you return to Paris.”

“Absolutely. This is getting ridiculous and entirely too unprofessional of Ms. Boustier. If it were any other person getting left behind they could end up killed here in Gotham.”

“Do you need us to arrange transportation?”

“No thank you, I already did,” Marinette turned to look at the motorcycles that stopped next to her at the curb.

Damian lifted the visor on his helmet and looked at her. She smiled at him and finished her call.

She looked at the second bike and rider and back at Damian.

Damian held out a second helmet to her and explained. “My father and brother’s aren’t entirely comfortable with me being alone and unsupervised with someone from the League. Todd volunteered to chaperone today.”

Marinette took the helmet and sat on the back of his bike. “Had many run-ins with Leaguer’s?”

“Too many,” Damian admitted. As soon as Marinette wrapped her arms around his waist and told him the class’s destination he took off.

Marinette smiled as she sat behind him on the bike and let herself fall into old patterns of trusting him to get them where they needed to go. Within minutes they pulled up alongside the bus. Marinette grinned as she asked him to rev the engine and get the class’s attention.

When several faces turned to the window Marinette lifted her visor and waved at the class. Just as she was laughing at their shocked faces the lights changed and Damian took off again with her laughter trailing behind them.

************************

Jason followed behind Damian and watched as Demon Spawn pulled up next to the bus before the girl waved at the class whose attention they had gotten. When Damian took off again he had to watch as the two moved together as they wove through traffic. What surprised Jason more was Damian never turned to check the cars behind him. Instead he watched as the girl would do checks and then Damian would move. Damian trusted her to watch their backs.

They seemed to have a system down and had seemlessly fallen back into it. Like they had ridden together before? But they couldn’t have. Damian came to Bruce at 10 years old. The girl had to be about the same age so how...?

Jason let the thought go as they pulled up to Gotham Mall. Damian parked near the main entrance the class would have to go through after parking the bike and let Marinette off first. He and Jason followed suit before locking their bikes and the helmets up and waited for the class to catch up.

“So Pixie-pop, you know Demon Spawn from the League?”

Most people would say Jason didn’t know how to use tact but most people were also idiots. Sometimes when you did things blatantly and unexpectedly you would get more honest answers from others.

Marinette glanced at Damian and then turned to Jason when he nodded. “I’ve known Damian most of my life in the League.”

Jason looked at her. The answer was factual but there was undertone of meanings behind it that he was missing.

“He mentioned the League was divided into factions? Divisions?” He fumbled his question and waited to see how she would respond.

Marinette turned to Damian and spoke in a language he didn’t know. It wasn’t English, French, Japanese or Chinese which he’d learned from Bruce and Alfred before his death. Nor was it Arabic, Russian, or German, which Talia had forced him to learn after his resurrection. The closest he could compare it to was Chinese but it had a different cadence, intonations, sounds, everything really so it was completely not understandable to him.

When Damian responded in the same language Jason was less shocked. He just waited for the two of them to finish.

Marinette nodded before turning back to Jason, “The word you were looking for was designations and yes Damian and I both had one. Most trainees are given one by the end of the first year of training though it can be changed if a particular aptitude is discovered. Or if they lose enough standing with the League.”

Her eyes were a little darker, a little sadder at the mention of losing rank within the League.

“Ah,” Jason nodded and looked at Damian, “you didn’t mention you had a designation last night.”

“TT, I didn’t think to mention it last night. My designation was the Demon’s Right Hand. The heir of the Demon.”

“Makes sense since you were Ras grandson,” Jason admitted.

Marinette snorted, “the old Demon had at least five grandchildren, though no one’s sure if his son had any children so there could be more out there. And Damian was the third born. Nothing the Demon ever did made sense.”

Jason was startled. No one knew that Damian had other siblings, blood-siblings, since he’d made it sound like his trainee group were like his only brothers and sisters.

“Grandfather insisted that only the best could succeed him. Even from my early trainee days my brother’s knew I could take their inheritance from them if I was better than they were. Our rivalry,” and boy was that a loaded idea, “was actively encouraged and the only way it could end was with the deaths of our competition.” Damian grimaced at that.

“Hey, Ali wasn’t so bad. He loved his big brother.” Marinette bumped Damian’s shoulder, trying to distract him.

“Ali loved his big sister,” Damian tapped a finger on Marinette’s nose, “who got her mother to take in the kid when he began his training and gave him family. Just like his big brother.”

Marinette smiled fondly. “He’s a good kid. Did you know Talia has him doing some PR as they’re ‘rebranding’ the League? I think the American, Luthor, has done that a few times.”

Damian quirked a brow.

“He’s shown up in Paris a time or two. Mostly as PR attempts to promote ‘acts of charity’ or such. My class actually ran into him a few years ago. He made a friend with one of the girls in my class. We pass messages through her when we can,” Marinette nodded to herself, “but it’s been harder to do with the tension between my classmates.”

Before Jason could ask anymore questions the bus with her classmates in it pulled into the Mall parking lot. Strangely another car seemed to be following behind it.

————————————

Cliffhanger!!!!

Permanent tags: @mindfulmagics @ozmav @bluerosette23 @multifandomscribette @mochinek0 @northernbluetongue

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Can’t find a blog: @fusser90

Okay, tag list capped out as I was scrolling back through comments on ch. 5 but the taglist is flexible anyways at this point. I have plans to update the Miraculous Awakens prologue and the Miraculous Future chapters this week. Please vote which you would like to see first. I’m hoping to get the first update posted either Wednesday or Thursday nights. (Though sadly I am suuuuuper flexible with my posting schedule. Basically I post whenever I have a chapter ready). Also i plan to wind up the Once Upon A Miraculous epilogue next weekend so that’s three chapters I’ll need to be toying with this week.

[iatheia]

EDA reviews Part 6 - books 47-55

Previous part 1, 2, 3, 4 & 5

47) The Slow Empire - Uh, couldn't really follow this one at all. There are books when the first person narration works, but not here - too many jumps in setting, too little connective tissue, most of it told from the POV of a person who is barely connected to the protagonists? And that's even before they started repeating chunks of text wholesale between various parts - and I couldn't figure out if it was intended, or if it is the ebook was acting out on me. More than half way through the book, I still couldn't entirely tell what the story is supposed to be about, or if the plot has even started yet. Even having finished it, I find myself somewhat aghast. There are a few glimpses of something interesting, but for the life of me, I can't figure out what. 4/10

48) Dark Progeny - Also not really feeling it. It's not a bad story, but I do rather prefer a Doctor Who story to actually feature the Doctor and the companions front and center, whether they are POV characters or not. Here, though, they are barely in it - it's even more egregious than the previous one in actually giving the supposed protagonists stuff to do, and even on rare occasions we do switch back to them, it is all pretty generic. Anji developing telepathic abilities and the Doctor trying to calm her down all the while Fitz is freaking out in the background? Yes, please, more of that. Following around 20 interchangeable OCs that have nothing to do with the trio? No thank you. 6/10.

49) The City of the Dead - If you are invoking magic in a sci-fi universe, you need to be able to handwave it. It doesn't need to be awfully complex, "something something aliens, something something energy" is usually enough, but without it, you can't just throw magic about willy nilly. There are rules.

There are moments when it is a beautiful story, evoking a lot of dream-like wonder, and if it managed to remain a hazy dream, it probably would have been better for it. At the same time there is something very uncomfortably cynical about it, to the degree it left a bad taste in my mouth. There is a narrow line between not shying away from the ugliness of the world and deliberately making something ugly just for the sake of it, and often it felt like it was leaning towards the latter. Dunno, I started out wanting to like it, and feeling rather conflicted about it, but by the end became utterly indifferent. 7/10

50) Grimm Reality - Pure crack. Mind Robber wishes it could be as hilarious and off the wall as this story is. It throws every cliche fairy tale narrative device in the book at the characters and expects them to take it with the straight face, all the while realizing that the rules of the world are completely bonkers. And it manages to sustain this energy throughout, which is a no small feat. It's actually pretty exhausting by the end of it. Fairy tales stories do not belong to a lengthy literary genre, and even taking time deconstructing them, at 95K words becomes it becomes just too much - figuratively, and, on occasion, literally. Still, pretty great, I wish more books had its energy 9/10.

51) The Adventuress of Henrietta Street - *sigh*. My expectations were pretty low to begin with, and I still am somehow disappointed. Credit where credit's due - it is probably most coherent of the books from Miles. And at least it's better than Interference. That's really not saying much, though.

Honestly, if you've read any story about prostitutes, murder, satanic sex rituals bordering on blatant pornography, eastern culture and "mysticism of female sex" used for fetish fuel, written by a dude who clearly gets off on all of this - you've read all of them. There is really nothing revolutionary or compelling about it. On the list of "plots I never want to see in Doctor Who", they are definitely up there. And the Doctor is dying again, because it wouldn't be Miles's book without it. And he's, uh... living in a brothel, trying to marry someone, in order to, uh..... ritualistically tie himself to Earth, for, reasons? Did I read that right? After over 100 years of living on Earth and wanting to do nothing else than seeing the back of it, right. And writing books not quite about sex but definitely about sex. Because that's the thing the Doctor apparently does now. Self insert what self insert. And Fitz and Anji are just... there. On an occasion. All of it exposed on in a dull faux academic style without a shred of characterization, all the while absolutely nothing of note is happening, despite being a singularly longest EDA.

Just, if you hate the characters so much. If you don't understand what makes them tick to this degree. If you don't even care to learn. If you consider any established emotions they should have about the plot you are putting them through beneath you. Why are you writing in a shared universe to begin with? 2/10

(I did have an unintentional moment of hilarity with it, though. There is a character that is referred to as Lord ______, as if his name is censored. TTS would always pronounce it as Lord Underbarunderbarunderbar. Always gave me a chuckle).

52) Mad Dogs and Englishmen - A hilarious story, a very easy read, flowing from scene to scene. There are several occasions of fridge horror treated with levity that I would have rather have avoided. Plus, it is as incestuous as a book about books can get, and yet.... It is just absurd enough to work.

Plus, the whole, “His books are full of black magic, mind control...and perversion - moral and ethical and sexual. He is polluting the atmosphere of our group”, “What’s next? Rewrite War and Peace so it’s about guinea pigs?” - Oh, the shade. It is a good book in its own right, but just for this alone, 10/10

53) Hope - It's a pretty average book. Not outstanding, not horrible. Would have made a decent episode, all things considered, in a bread and butter sort of way. It does have some great ideas - the refuge of humanity, the conflict between Anji and the Doctor finally coming to light - not quite the type of conflict I was hoping for, though. If only it had a bit more nuisance, without neatly delineated black and white, if the antagonist didn't end up being a mustache twirling villain, if the Doctor didn't end up strong-arming everyone in a much more macho manner than he normally goes for (with a rather clunky dialogue). It had potential, even if it didn't end up being realized in full. 8/10

54) Anachrophobia - Very meh. The set up was fairly contrived, it never made me care about any of the characters, including whatever the hell the Doctor and co were doing, not to mention any of the secondary characters. Not terribly engaging, after a point I was mostly flipping through it. There is some big conflict brought up at 95% mark, and it is resolved in just couple of pages via a deus ex machina and a paradox. Overall, I might have said that I would have liked it better if I was in a mood for existential horror, but I took a break in the middle to listen to the Lease of Life - and it actually touches upon several similar themes, but with and outstanding character drama and much more graceful execution, which made this book look even more poor in comparison. 5/10

55) Trading Futures - I will give the author all the points for keeping an eye on the future. Perhaps, in 2002, predicting tablets being used as menus in fancy restaurants wasn’t that big of a reach, but I absolutely had a spit take when TTS has read to me something about “eye-phones”. There are some modestly clever moments throughout the book. Too bad that the rest of it is a complete rubbish. Not terribly original, either - a lot of ideas are copied directly from other books and other franchises. Reasonably entertaining, all things considered, but in a much more slapstick sort of way than was probably intended. 7/10

Overall impressions so far - This batch is, for the most part, fine. Some stories are worst than others, some better. With one exception, nothing horrendous, but nothing to write home about, either. They are, for the most part, serviceable. Individually, they have decent enough plots. But. There is very little character work. They can generally be read in any order, or dropped entirely, and you wouldn’t miss anything. The Doctor is mostly coasting from the excellent streak in the last batch, always in a spot light. I am starting to tire of the whole amnesia arc, though - it was good, but it ran its course, and at this point, with everything functionally back to norm, with barely a stray mention of it here and there, we are starting to be overdue for some semblance of resolution of all that. Henrietta Street is entirely a step in the wrong direction - not only it does nothing worthwhile for the characters, it’s just getting unnecessarily further into the weedworks, adding yet another plot thread that is forced on other writers to carry (they mention it occasionally, but it’s not like there is much to build upon) - rather viciously reminding of the previous mess of an ark “don’t you dare to think that it is over”. And I am so over it. Just, move on.

The companions fare rather worse. They are decent enough, they participate in action, in each book, they are mostly staying in character, with a handful of neat moments here and there (in a blink and you’ll miss it sort of way, though), they aren’t written off as an unnecessary burden to carry, which is an improvement. There is nothing meaty given to them though - they ask the necessary questions, do the things required of them, and generally stay out of the way when they are not needed. I guess Anji has at least some character driven moments, even though most of them are reduced to “I miss my dead boyfriend”. Which is... fine, we’ve all lost people, we all mourn them in our own way, but it has been 14 books since her introduction, and she is leaving in another 10. To have her character reduced to just that bit from her first book, with barely anything else to offer.... Plus, all the while, she rarely felt like she integrated into the team - because she is constantly eying her exit and returning to normality (even though she always decides to stay just a little while longer due to circumstances), it’s like from the very beginning she had one foot out of the door.

But while Anji is a bit of a one trick pony, at least she has that much. Poor Fitz gets absolutely nothing to do. The last meaningful book that addressed his character in any way was all the way back around book #42-43, and even that was just catching up on plot after his prolonged absence. He’s been essentially frozen since early 30s books. He is generally a fun character to have around, and does good supporting work, but can he please get something more impactful any time soon? Heck, by this point I’ll even take the recurrence of “finding a new love interest number 20 who will inevitably die by the end of the book” - it has been overdone, and it is certainly not a very exciting plot, not to mention reductive, but at least it’d be something. Though, I guess only one companion is allowed to carry that staple at the time, and right now Anji is it, two dead lovers is just an overkill.

And it is an absolute shame - especially when considering that on the other side, Big Finish was in the middle of streak of some of the best stories. Over the same time that these novels were published, we had audios such as Project Twilight, Eye of the Scorpion, Colditz, One Doctor, Chimes of Midnight, Seasons of Fear, which were full of character.

[fearfulkittenwrites]

“You know what? Fuck you.” and “Fuck you batman”

Word count: 2070

Warnings: Physical Abuse, pretty much child abuse (but lightly, i promise), vomiting

Notes: Okay, so this work needs some rather long notes, I think. If you don't want to read this, you can totaly skip it though. This is... pretty much the only angst thing I ever wrote that turned out actually good. And if the ending seems kind of... unfinished, in a sense, it's because it kind of is. Most of it was written when I was really down, and I can't give it a good ending. If anyone has any clue on how to make it better than this, by all means, go ahead. I'd love for this to have a happy ending instead of this. Also, I wrote this as some sort of catharsis for me? Most of my writing has some very personal element, but this is one of those pieces that if I handed my therapist, she'd laught at how obviously I'm projecting, so if anyone seems a little bit poorly characterized, that's probably why. Aaaaand this was written waaaay before I recieved my bingo card. But one of the two slots was filled by it, and the other fit so very nicely, that it pushed me to post it. Lastly, thank you for clicking this! And final warning to my emetophobic friends to walk away from this one. Good reading, and stay safe out there, it's a crazy world.

It was a stupid argument. They were yelling their faces off in the batcave, angry, nearly foaming at the mouth, over some serial killer. (It might seem like that’s a big deal, but c’mon, this is Gotham we’re talking about) It’s not like it had never happened before; both men were strong-willed, stubborn and hot-headed, they were bound to argue all the time.

“I’ve had enough!” Batman shouted “You’re staying out of this!”

“Are you insane?!” Nightwing shot back “You’re so deep into your own empty hopes you’re gonna get everyone killed!”

“I know what I’m doing Nightwing! And you’re staying on the ground tonight!” He pointed at the other’s face.

“You seriously think that I’ll just stay put, like a good little dog?!” He seemed incredibly offended. The volume of the conversation kept getting louder.

“You are gonna do as I say.” Now the man’s voice was lower. Dangerously so.

“No! I don’t give a damn about your skewed view of this city, and if you want to walk straight into a compromising position because of it, fine, go ahead. But if I let you go out there with them, following this stupid mindset, I’ll never forgive myself.”

“You think they can’t protect themselves?” He said, before shouting “You think I haven’t taught them well enough?!”

“I think you can’t protect them from what you refuse to see!” Nightwing shouted back. And then it happened.

The arguments were regular, sure. But this? This was unexpected, to say the least.

Batman slapped Nightwing across the face.

Except... That isn’t what happened. Or at least, it wasn’t all that happened.

It’s not as simple as that.

No, those weren’t simply two masked heroes getting caught in an argument that had gone physical. It wasn’t just Batman hitting Nightwing.

That was Bruce hitting Dick.

The silence that fell over everyone’s ears was deafening. No one in that cave even dared to breath, everyone waiting for the other’s retaliation. A retaliation that never came. Dick stared at the floor in the direction his face had been forced towards, breathing heavily. No, not heavily. He let out shaky breaths, although Damian was certain he was the only one able to tell the difference.

Nightwing then shook his head slightly, still looking at the ground, smiled sadly and let out a little huff that resembled a laugh. He left, walking past all of the other masked heroes, his brothers, with his eyes fixated on the ground. Damian never though he’d see Dick Grayson, the personification of confidence, staring at the ground. Now Bruce had a room of vigilantes staring at him in a way none of them ever did before. Even Red Hood seemed horrified. Robin scowled at him, before leaving to chase his brother.

“You know what? Fuck you.” Red Hood let out, before leaving the cave too, headed for the city “Don’t...” He stopped, gun in hand, pointing it up at the sky as he spoke “Don’t contact me. Just... Fuck you, Batman. And fuck you, Bruce.”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m with him.” Red Robin said “I’ll check on the Titans. Good luck with the case.” He jumped out into the night as well.

Bruce turned to Steph, slightly.

“No.” She said turning to Cass “Look, you wanna stay, that’s your decision, but I can’t.”

“I’m not staying.” Cass stated, pulling her own cowl on.

His comm was static. Oracle had left too.

Bruce breathed in. He pulled out the cowl. Alfred stared at him from the door for a minute, and left before being noticed, heading for the kitchen.

...

Jason was sitting on a rooftop, looking down, when Red Robin landed next to him.

“You should go check on him.”

“Don’t you think he’d rather be alone?” He asked, looking up “Also, Gotham needs our patrols.”

“To the second point, sure, but me, Spoiler and Batgirl can cover the city for tonight, and we don’t know for sure that Batman’s not coming. To the first, maybe.” He sighed “But Damian went after him. He’s probably talking to Dick as we speak, and that’s not exactly a bad thing, but Dick won’t be able to drive him away, and we both know that tonight it’s gonna get ugly. Real ugly.” Red Hood turned to look at him, wondering what was his point “Damian looks up to him. He’s a parental figure, whether they like it or not. He shouldn’t have to see Dick like that, he won’t have the proper tools to handle it. You on the other hand...” Jason sighed too.

“Yeah, I see what you mean.” He nodded “I can handle it.” The Red Hood slowly stood up “By the way, you see him tonight, put that bo staff to good use and shove it up his ass. Then tell him I send my regards.”

...

Dick stormed into his room, slamming his door shut and hurling his mask against the wall. He pulled off the top of his costume, but that was all he managed to do before he broke down sobbing, sitting on his bed, hugging himself. He had taken many hits in his life. He handled all of them. This one... He didn’t know how to handle it, didn’t know where to start. His cheek still burned. It was probably red, maybe there would be a perfect mark of his palm and fingers on it.

He screamed, rubbing his face harshly in a fit of rage. He woud have scratched the skin off his arms if he didn’t keep his nails so short, but he had to settle for rubbing instead, fingertips digging into the flesh without breaking it. It went on for a minute, before he managed to calm down.

“I know you’re there.” He said trying to keep some composure “Leave.”

“It’s not him.” Damian answered from behind the door.

“I know. Leave.” Dick heard a ‘-tt-.’, followed by the sound of his door opening. He had his back turned to it.

“No.” He answered, closing it behind him.

“I don’t wanna talk about it.” Dick turned to face the wall, keeping his back to Damian.

“Then don’t.” He replied, sitting on the floor, infront of him “I’m here to make sure you won’t do anything stupid.” Dick knew that was his way of saying ‘I care about you’. He did a piss poor job at showing affection, but no one could blame him.

Damian slowly lifted a hesitant hand, setting it on the other’s shin, stroking his leg. Dick offered a weak smile, looking down; once again, this was a code. It was Damian saying ‘I know I don’t like hugs, but if you need them right now, it’s okay’. The boy looked down at his boots and helped him out of them, watching as Dick instantly curled in on himself once he was barefoot, pulling his legs to his chest, hiding his face between his knees. Damian sat down next to him, placing a hand on his back as he cried once more.

“It’s just...” He tried “I never thought...”

“I know. None of us did.”

Dick felt sick. He wanted to thow up. Maybe he would throw up, if he kept sobbing like that. Damian rubbed circles on his bare skin, trying to calm him down, to no avail. There was a knock on the door.

“Hey, Bird Brain.” Jason’s voice came from it, soft and wary “Can you open the door for me?”

Damian looked at his brother, who nodded. The boy got up and slowly cracked open the door, already scowling at Jason, who raised an eyebrow but kept quiet.

“Hey,” He kneeled in front of Dick “Calm down okay? I’m sure Alfred is knocking some sense into him as we speak.” Dick nodded weakly, and Jason pushed some strands of hair away from his forehead.

There was another knock on the door. This time Bruce’s voice was heard.

“Dick, I...”

“Leave.” He replied, voice cracking.

“I’m sorry, I...”

“Leave!” He yelled. They heard footsteps, walking away from the room. He turned to Damian “Dames, you should go too.”

“I’m not going anywhere.” He crossed his arms.

“Seriously, thank you. But... I just... Jason’s here and... I need to cry. Really cry and I don’t think I should put you through that.” Damian stared at him, unsure on what to do.

“It’s okay Damian. I got him.” Jason reassured. It wasn’t worth much for the kid, but he thought it best to give his brothers some space, so he walked out of the room.

Dick broke down again, and Jason held him through it. He held his brother for almost fifteen minutes. He knew there was nothing he could say that would make any of this better, so he kept his mouth shut, listening when he eventually gathered the strenght to speak.

“I can’t... Why did he do this? I’m- I was worried. I just wanted to protect you.” He cried against the other’s shoulder.

“I know Dickie.” Jason stroked his hair.

“He was just so – so blind. He’d walk you straight into the crossed fire, and-and... Oh God.” He pulled himself away from Jason and tried to run into the bathroom, covering his mouth, but there was no time. He threw up on the floor, and the only reason he didn’t fall face first into it was Jason’s fast thinking, wrapping his arms around the older man’s waist “Fuck.” He murmured, spitting on the ground “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay Dick. It happens. I’ll get Alfred.” He said, setting him on the bed.

“No, it’s fine, I can clean it...”

“Don’t be stupid Dickie,” He handed him some tissues “Look at your state. It’s okay, he can handle it just fine.” He shot out of the door, dashing through the stairs, finding the butler in the kitchen, making some kind of chicken soup “Dick puked.” He stated, going for a glass and filling it with water.

“Oh dear.” Alfred exclaimed, lowering the heat on the stove. He turned around throwing his apron on the marble balcony and grabbing cleaning supplies. Both of them ran to his room; and after all these years, Jason still wasn’t used to the idea that Alfred could run through the manor just as fast as him. He slowly opened the door “Master Dick?”

“I’m sorry Alfred.” He murmured from the bed.

“It’s quite alright, my boy.” He said, kneeling down to clean up “It’s not your fault.” Jason handed the man a water glass.

“Thanks.” Dick whispered “I feel awful for putting you two through this.”

“Nonsense, master Dick.” Alfred said from the floor “My job is taking care of this family.”

“Besides,” Jason sat down on the bed “You’d do the same. You have done the same.” He grabbed his bare foot, squeezing it before letting go. Alfred soon left, as quickly and discreetly as he came “C’mon,” Jason said, standing up “Let’s brush those teeth.”

“Yeah.” Dick let himself be led out of bed, going into his bathroom. His brother stood next to the sink, leaning against the wall.

Jason followed him back into the room, where he put on his pajamas but didn’t slip into bed.

“I don’t really want to sleep yet,” Dick said “Maybe I should go patrolling with you.”

“Dick, no offense, but you are the king of bad ideas.” Jason responded “And I’m not going on patrol, Replacement said they’d cover the city for tonight.”

“Okay then.”

“Are you hungry?” Jason asked “Alfred was cooking, maybe we can have some.”

“Yeah, let’s go pester him.” Dick answer, smile lacking the usual life.

The next morning, Dick didn’t go down for breakfast. Bruce tried finding him in the manor, but none of it’s inhabitants and usual visitors were anywhere to be seen. Even Duke, who wasn’t even in the cave when it happened, seemed to be avoiding him, not answering his calls. He decided to leave a letter for his son, but when he sat down in front of the paper, he didn’t know what to write. He was overwhelmed with guilt, and knew that he had crossed a line he couldn’t come back from, not entirely.

He had been so worried about deaths and killings as Batman, that he neglected the lines he shouldn’t cross as Bruce Wayne. And now that he crossed one of those, he had no clue on what to do about it.

[ellana-ravenwood]

The Ex - Jason Todd x Single !Mom reader part 3/5

Hi, my name’s Ella’, and I’m here to fuck up absolutely perfect families. Hope you’ll like this new chapter of Jay x Single!Mom, I think there’ll be only one more part after this, and um...yup, hope you’ll like it ! : 

FINISHED SERIES : PART 1, PART 2, PART 4, PART 5 NEWLY ADDED EPILOGUE : PART 1/3

My masterlist blog : @ella-ravenwood-archives​

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                                                      ******

“Hey (Y/N).”

He dares to say, a wrapped package in one hand, and flowers in the other.

“…Jess ?”

You whisper, not quite believing your eyes.

Jess. Him. How ? After all this years, why ?

Jess. Him. Viggo’s father.

You don’t think. As soon as the information of who this is finally reaches your brain, and the shock passes, you walk straight to him. 

Jason, who knows who “Jess” is, looks at you with a pained look as you rush to your ex, as if you’re about to give him a hug.

And Jess ? Oh Jess. He has an infuriating smile on his face, the kind that means “I’m gonna get exactly what I want and I know it”, and he opens his arms as if you’re about to give him a hug.

Only you don’t. 

Oh no. On the contrary. Years of pent up feelings and resentment against him explode inside you, and as you reach him...You punch him right in the jaw with all your might. 

Everyone gasps. Jess grunts in pain. You grab your fist and swear because fuck punching people actually hurts ! Viggo, who went to stand next to Jason, lets out a laugh, apparently delighted that you just hit his father. 

Your boy knew about who his dad was. 

You kept ONE picture of him to show him what he looked like (and Viggo was very happy to see that he looked NOTHING like his father, but resembled you a lot), because you knew the importance of knowing your own identity. Knowing where you came from. Even if it meant knowing that your father was a total fuck up, at least...you knew. 

Viggo knew that he left. Right before his birth. 

He knew everything you knew, in fact. Because you never refused to answer his questions. You thought he had every rights to know about the man who abandoned him. At the same time, you tried to not be biased and give your son only the truth, the facts. 

You never spoke ill of his father. 

You always said you and him got along very well, and that you really were in love with him. You even talked about the good times you had with Jess, after all, you two dated for years before you got engaged and you got pregnant...You never spoke ill of his father, but you stated the facts. 

Jess left. There was no beating around the bushes. Viggo deserved to know the truth, and you weren’t about to make up some lie about his dad having to leave for some reasons. No. He left, of his own accord, just like that. 

Even if at the time you were in love, and even if he was always sweet and nice to you...he ultimately broke your heart by leaving. By not even having the courage to face you to tell you so, only writing a note saying everything was “too much”.  

Jess left Gotham city the day his son was supposed to be born. A few months before you were supposed to get married. That was a fact. And maybe he used to be a nice guy, and you used to be in love with him and all of that...but in the end, he still left. 

And though when he was younger Viggo couldn’t quite understand what everything meant, and why his daddy decided to not even see him, wondering if he did anything wrong...Now, at the very wise age of eight, he figured things out. After all, he was quite a smart kid.

Actually, Jason coming in yours and his life helped him understand. It had been just a little bit over six months since you started to date Jay, but it was everything Viggo needed to finally get it. 

Jess wasn’t his father. 

A father doesn’t leave his kid because he suddenly freaked out about becoming a dad ! A father doesn’t abandon his family, just leaving a short note, not even facing them ! A father, a real one, doesn’t run away at the first sign of trouble ! A father takes care of his kid, no matter what. 

To Viggo, the concept of a “dad” was kind of a foreign one. He saw dads on TV, in some of his favorite shows and such. He saw his friends’ dads. But...it was always just a theory to him. 

Dads were suppose to be there, to play catch with their sons, to help them do their homework, to kiss their booboo and read them bed times stories...But his dad wasn’t there. And you had to fill in and do everything. 

Viggo never thought it was a bad thing, not having a dad. Because you, his beloved mom, were absolutely the best !! 

But then. Then Jason came in the picture. And suddenly...Suddenly Viggo understood that having a dad was also awesome ! 

Your son knew since the beginning, since Jason took care of him when he was sick, that night you were suppose to have your first date, that Jason was definitely “real father material”. He instinctively took care of him, even though he didn’t even know him that much ! 

And though he was yet too shy and unsure about really calling him that, although he was still kind of afraid Jason would freak out if he did...Viggo realized, as his biological father dared to barge in today, that in his heart, Jason already became kind of his dad. 

Not that Jess guy. 

Not the one who abandoned him and left his mom in a deep struggle all those years ago ! But the one who didn’t actually “have to” stay and yet spend a night taking care of a sick kid he barely knew, and eating nacho chips and guacamole on the floor of a small living room as a first date. The one who didn’t have to stay, and didn’t run away at the first sign of trouble. 

And so, seeing you punch Jess’ goddamn lights out was highly satisfying, for the little boy. He knew violence wasn’t a good answer, but honestly, in this instance ? He didn’t care. Because he too, was mad at his “father” for never even wanting to know him. For never taking news about him, and suddenly reappearing right now, as if nothing ! 

The flowers and the wrapped object Jess was holding went flying in the air before falling on the ground with a loud noise. 

“How dare you ?! How dare you come back ? Today, on his birthday at that ?! Who do you think you are ?” 

You scream at him, holding your painful fist in your uninjured hand. Fuming. Viggo has never seen you that angry before. It’s kind of scary. Without thinking about it, the boy grabs Jason’s hand. For comfort. And Jason ? He squeezes back, reassuring Viggo immediately. 

Your ex straightens back up, and massages his jaw. it’s definitely gonna bruise. Damn, you had a mean right hook ! He looks at you, eyes narrowing a bit, and his next words make your blood boil : 

“Who do I think I am ? I’m his dad, that’s who I am.” 

Jess quickly realizes his poor word choice as your eyes turn a couple shades darker and you grab him by the shoulder...To violently bring him towards you and headbutt the hell out of him. 

He joins the flowers and gift he brought with him, on the floor, as you take a few unsure step backward. Ok, well headbutting someone also hurts. You see stars for a few seconds when...Jason. Of course. 

Jason is by your side now. And Viggo is too (you don’t see him, but he harbors a rather satisfied smile, as he sees his father shaking his head, down on the floor, trying to regain his senses after you basically beat the heck out of him). 

Your boyfriend lays a supportive hand on your lower back, and you kinda fall against him as your head spins a bit...It only takes a few seconds for you to get back to normal, but you stay against him. You feel as if he’s lending you his strength, and oh god you need it right now. It’s pretty incredible really, how he manages to soothe you in such a situation.

Jess gets back up once more, and, keeping his distance with you this time, says : 

“Ok. I’m sorry. I’m aware I just...I...I’m an asshole, ok ? I know. I shouldn’t have left. And I’m sorry I just assumed right now...I know I have no rights after what I did. I know I fucked up. I came here today to try and...fix things ok ? Glue the pieces back together. My sister just got a kid. And I went to see her in the hospital, and when I held my nephew it...Well it just reminded me that I...that I...That I screwed up. Big time. And so here I am. I know I should’ve called, I’m sorry. But I thought coming back on his birthday would...I don’t know, be nice.” 

“You thought wrong.”

You say, your voice cold and harsh. Not an ounce of forgiveness in your tone. Tt. What was he thinking ? That because he suddenly realized he was an ass, you’d forgive him that fast ? That you’d forget YEARS of trying to make ends meet ? Of working multiple jobs just to feed your kid ? That you’d forget how much he broke you, when he left you ? Not even saying where he was going ? Or why, exactly, he was leaving, except that it was “too much” ? 

Damn right he was wrong. 

“Listen (Y/N), I...I’m not playing tricks or anything ok ? I really had an epiphany, with my sister’s kid. I...I want to be part of his life ? Of our kid’s life ?” 

“Our ? Buddy, you lost the right to be his dad when you left eight years ago. As I was about to give birth to him.” 

There’s a small silence. You completely forgot that Jason’s family was here, as you’re entirely focus on that asshole that basically ruined your life (though the fact that his existence brought Viggo into your life was a blessing..the only good thing left in your heart about Jess, really). 

Your ex lets out a frustrated sigh and you think about hitting him once more for a second. How dare he get frustrated with you right now ? But then he takes the flowers and the gift back from the floor, and says : 

“Ok I see now is a bad time. Mea Culpa. I guess I didn’t think. I thought...I thought you’d be happy. That I want to be more in his life, you know ? I guess I really should’ve called. Ask for forgiveness before coming over. I’m sorry. I can see you’re busy so...I’ll go now. We can talk alone, later, right ?”

You don’t say anything, and glare at him some more. You don’t take the flowers and the gift he’s trying to give you either. He sighs once more and says : 

“Listen, we really need to talk ok ? I’m sorry I didn’t expect you to react that way ok ? Now I do realize you have every rights to. And I’m a total ass for barging in like this. But...in my defense, I didn’t expect you to have any...Company.” 

The way he looks at Jay makes your blood boil once more, and you’re about to punch him again but you feel your boyfriend’s hand on your lower back, caressing you soothingly and...It works. You exchange a look with him, and you can see in his eyes that...yes. Yes you understand. 

You should probably stop hitting that jerk in front of your son. No matter how big of a jerk he is, you’re really not giving a good example right now (oh but if only you could see the highly satisfied smile your son had on his face right now !). 

But it seems that Jess doesn’t quite learn his lessons fast enough, because he has the guts to say : 

“So um...I guess that’s my replacement, uh ?” 

You narrow your eyes back at him again. Did he just call Jason a “that” ? And what was he even insinuating right there ? Oh my god he had NO rights even making this kind of comment ! But before you can get to him again, and this time kick him in the balls, Viggo says : 

“There was nothing to replace, really. You weren’t there.” 

You often cursed your son’s smartassness, but in this instance ? You can’t help but smile proudly at him, even if you know you might be a bit petty right now. Eh. Who cares ? You deserve to be petty. Plus given the look on Jess’ face, your boy’s words hurt him more than a kick in the balls would have. 

“Outch...But I guess I deserve it uh ? I’m sorry about what I just said. About the replacement. I realize it’s not my place to...I’m sorry. I keep screwing up but...I really didn’t expect you to have company.”

“Oh yeah ? Were you expecting me to wallow forever while waiting for you ? Because I wallowed for about ten seconds, until I realized I had no time for self-pity because I had a kid to feed. All on my own. All of our plans to make it work pfioush, gone into flames.” 

“Ok. Ok (Y/N), let’s take a break in the bashing ok ? You can lash out on me later. When we won’t have an...audience. Please, let’s just meet later ok ? Give me a chance to apologize at least ? To explain myself ? Give you my side of the story ? No wait, don’t speak. I’ll um...I’ll call later ok ?”

“I won’t answer.”

“I’ll still call. And hope that when your anger will go down, you’ll give me a chance. I know I don’t deserve it, believe me I do. But...I’ll try anyway.” 

He shoves the flowers in your arms, and you catch them by reflex. He then turns to your son and says : 

“Happy birthday...Um...uh...”

“It’s Viggo. My name is Viggo.” 

“Oh, Viggo uh ? Like the actor ?”

“No. Not at all. You’re completely wrong.” 

He’s not sure quite why, but Viggo doesn’t want that guy to know that you named him after the actor indeed. He doesn’t want that guy to know anything ! He should have given him a fake name...Ugh, what kind of father doesn’t even know his own kid’s name ?! It’s not like you stopped him from coming to see him...he just didn’t seem to be interested until now !

Jess looks at your son for a few seconds, and then smiles sadly. 

“Well...happy birthday, Viggo.” 

Your son reluctantly takes the gift his “father” is giving him in his hands, as Jess turns one final time to you and says : 

“I’ll call you later. Sorry again, truly. I hope...I hope you believe me. Talk to you soon, hopefully...Bye (Y/N). I’m sorry. And um...bye buddy.” 

Jess finally leaves, and there’s a few more seconds of you not being able to let go of your anger. Of wanting to run after him, and push him down the stairs. But then...Then your son moves, and your eyes follow him. 

Viggo walks back in the apartment, passes Jason’s family, and goes into the kitchen. Without saying a word. Worried, you follow after him. Jason does too, so is the rest of his family. 

He climbs on the kitchen counter, and opens the window. He looks down in the street, his father’s present still in his hands. There’s a few seconds of confused silence. You’re still so shocked and moved about your ex’s appearance that you don’t even think about going to your eight years old son and scolding him about looking out the sixth floor window like this ! 

And apparently, Jason, his dad and his siblings are just as confused and lost, because they don’t do anything either. 

And then, after a minute or so, Viggo put the gift his father gave him out of the window, dangling it into the air for a few seconds...before letting go of it. 

There’s a second of silence, followed by a crashing sound and a “JESUS CHRIST !”...It’s Jess’ voice, you recognize it. 

Your son close the window, and looks at you with a disappointed look before saying : 

“I missed.”  

You don’t know why, but all of a sudden, all your stress, pain and anger from the past few minutes vanish and you start laughing louder than you ever did before. Quickly, the rest of the fam follows. 

He missed. Oh my god. That boy...

************

“...it wasn’t a very heavy gift anyway, even if I hadn’t missed it would have just like, knocked him out or something, nothing too bad.”

Viggo was saying to Damian, as he was helping Jason’s brother to put his actual gifts away. Damian was chuckling, listening to your boy. They were in the living room, while you were in the kitchen with the rest of the family.

“I’m...I’m so sorry Mr. Wayne. I realize this isn’t a great...first impression...”

“Please, call me Bruce. And then...It really wasn’t your fault.”

There’s a small silence. Not an awkward one though, as you look apologetically to Bruce, and he looks back at you with a reassuring and paternal look.

You smile back at him and feel strangely appeased. And when you turn to the rest of his Jason’s sibling, and they all smile to you. When you see Damian talking with your son about what does he think he got in his presents ?

You’re reassured.

You turn to Jason and...is that a troubled look on his face or are you just imagining ? Oh yeah no, you did just imagine it, as he brightly smiles at you and comes to wrap a tender arm around your waist.

“We can...leave if you want, you know ? To let you process everything ?” 

He says in your ear, and you turn to him, panicked as you answer : 

“God no ! I..need to think about something else right now ok ? And it’s Viggo’s birthday, he invited you guys, you can't go !” 

Jason nods, quite relieved, to be honest. He didn’t want to go. He wanted to stay and see Viggo’s cute smile as he blows his candles and open his presents.

But the arrival of Jess kind of...threw him off. Because no matter how much of an asshole that guy was, he seemed sincere when he said that he truly wanted to be part of Viggo’s life. And that was a good thing, right ? 

But as Jason’s gaze was drawn back to Viggo, he couldn’t help but feel a big pang in his chest. If Jess was back in yours and his life, what would happen to him ? Jason was already in too deep in love with you, and head over heals for your little boy, to just move on...

************

The rest of your son’s birthday went perfectly well. Better than you ever expected actually, even with Jess coming to ruin everything. 

Well, actually your ex didn’t manage to ruin anything in the end, because this party was a true success ! And one of the main reason for that was your son himself. He seemed to have completely forgotten about his “father” coming back, as he took his spot at one end of the living room’s table. 

“Time for the candles !” 

He chirped happily, and you all sung him the traditional “happy birthday” song. 

“Make a wish baby !” 

You tell him, and...Yes. You know exactly what he wished for. You can see it in his eyes, as he goes from looking at you to Jason, and then to the rest of Jay’s family. You’re pretty sure you know what he wished for

He blows his candles, making a wish that he doesn’t say out loud because if he does, it won’t happen, right ? And then he turns to the pile of gift on the couch...

“Ya don’t want to eat some cake first ?” 

You ask, knowing perfectly that he won’t be patient enough for that, but also will want to be polite and will ask his guests first. Which is exactly what he does : 

“Um...You guys want...cake ?”

“Yes.”

They all say unanimously, and Viggo’s face falls. He really was expecting them to tell him he could open his gifts first. He looks absolutely crushed, and slumps back in his chair. He looks pitifully at you, and nods to the cake...and it makes the entire “bat family” feel bad that they made this little joke. 

Bruce looks utterly panicked, and it’s kind of a feat, to see THE Bruce Wayne that worried about hurting a kid’s feelings ! You quickly wonder if he was a dotting father to Jason, when he was younger...Probably. 

Damian, who’s the only one who actually didn’t answer “yes” glares at all of his family members. How DARE they make that sweet child sad ? And sure, being sad because he has to eat cake and can’t open his present yet is kind of very childish and...Oh but he IS a kid right ? So allow him be bummed out ! And therefor, Damian glares some more. 

Tim and Cass are properly mortified that Viggo didn’t seem to understand their jokes. It makes Cassandra want to speak soothing words to him, forcing herself to get out every words she can muster, while Tim freezes, not sure what to do or what to say because now he’s afraid he’ll only make the situation worst...Dick quickly says : 

“Oh kiddo, we were totally joking ! Of course you can open your gift now, the cake can wait !”

Viggo’s smile comes back at once, and it turns into a mischievous grin as he says : 

“Got ya ! You should see your faces, hilarious !” 

And then he jumps off his chair to rush to his presents. You and Jason (who by now was used to your son’s antics) roll your eyes as you witness Bruce, Dick, Tim, Damian and Cassandra’s “shocked” face as the kid completely played them, making them think he was actually sad. Damn it. Smart one. They really thought this little boy was...oh, all of a sudden all of Jason’s stories about this little smartass made sense ! 

************

“...That’s fo-for me ?” 

Viggo asks, not quite sure he can believe his eyes as he holds a brand new PlayStation 4 in his hands, staring at it as if it’s the greatest thing he ever saw.

“Um, yes, yes it is. Jason said you didn’t have one...R-right ?”

It kind of totally adorable, to see Bruce Wayne stumbles on his word in front of your son, unsure if he did the right thing or not. 

It’s funny, as Jason looks at his father, he has a flashback at when he first arrived at Wayne’s Manor. Back then too, Bruce was quite stressed about doing the right things. Dick and Jason exchange a knowing look. Both of them “experienced” that shy side of Bruce...By the time Tim and Cass came in, Bruce kinda knew what he was suppose to do. 

But with Dick and Jason ? Oh he was so often confused. “Alfred, they can have ice cream for dinner, right ?” It was a lot of questions and not many answers. 

Jason looked fondly upon Viggo and his father interacting, and he was pretty sure he heard his heart slowly bursting when Viggo calmly settled his new PlayStation on a side, got on his feet, solemnly walked towards Bruce and asked politely :

“May I hug you ? Please ?” 

You were pretty sure you “awed” aloud too. Your son was such a sweet little man...You know that he wanted to rush to Bruce and hug the hell out of him, but since he didn’t know him very much and wasn’t too sure either of how to ask...It was just so cute, how he was being so serious while asking for a hug !

“Um...Yes. Yes of course.” 

And oh Bruce was in for a treat because when your son gave a hug ? He gave a hug. Your little boy says “thank you, sir” a bit formally and then...he lunges at Jason’s father with all his might, and circled his arms around the man’s neck tightly.

“Thank you so much for the PS4 I love it, oh my god thank you it’s too much I can’t accept it, thanks a lot for it ! I don’t think I can get it because it’s too much...but thank you !” 

Bruce answers to the hug by wrapping his own arms around your boy, and is even more confused than before as your son keep saying he can’t accept the gift, but that it’s also the best gift ever and he can’t wait to try it, while not being able to accept it...You chuckle and once again, you’re so proud to have raised such a cute little one, who understands the value of things. 

Of course, he’ll accept the PlayStation (you’ve never been able to afford one for him...), but you’re just so proud of him right now, for even thinking about refusing the gift because it’s a bit too much. You’re too happy he can finally have a console though. Of course, he wasn’t a poor little boy cause he didn’t have one, but it was nice, that for once, he could have the same things his classmates had. 

Viggo hugs Bruce for two long and cute minutes, and you can see the man slowly relaxing in your son’s arms. Too sweet for this world. When your boy finally let’s go, he smiles widely and then goes to hug his new PlayStation, repeating “I love it I love it” multiple times before he realizes it’s a bit rude to not open his other gifts...

He stands up and takes another one. 

“That’s from me !” 

Damian says with a smile, clearly eager to see the boy’s reaction. And when your son tears open the box...

“OH MY GOD !!” 

He yells, and then all you see is your little eight year old kid running around the living room screaming happily and...the hell did he just get ?

When your son finally calms down, and puts the box on the floor to then proceed on literally jumping on Damian, you finally see what’s the matter. 

“Cheese Viking VR”. A virtual helmet with the entire “Cheese Viking” game saga. It was suppose to be sold out, and new production for it was running slow, as the company didn’t expect to sell that many sets...It was probably a pain to find. No wonder, Damian looked so proud of himself ! 

Jason couldn’t believe his eyes, as he saw his bratty little brother hug Viggo back gladly, and smiling fondly at the kid. He knew they somewhat bonded when you meet them at the arcade room, but it was still a surprise. A pleasant one. 

Viggo finally calmed down a second time, and went to sit on the couch, saying :

“Ok guys, if you have any more of this kind of surprises, you need to tell me. Because I don’t think my heart can handle it right now...” your little one says, but it seems like Dick, Tim and Cassandra don’t think their gift will outmatch Bruce’s or Damian’s. 

But they’re wrong. They don’t outmatch it, no, but they make your boy as happy as the PlayStation and the Cheese Viking VR set. 

Tim gives him a “little chemist set”, and coincidentally, it was exactly the one that your son always wanted but that you could never afford...You had to tell Viggo to be patient, or he would have started experiencing there and there, forgetting the world around him. 

Dick gives him an electric skateboard with all the safety gears, and your son just couldn’t believe that this was just for him. He never saw that many toys and such in the same room ! All for him !! 

And when Cassandra gave him basically every single action figure in existence about his favorite TV show, you were pretty sure your kid was gonna faint right in the middle of the room. 

He gave away many hugs, and said the sentence “I can’t believe this is for me !” a hundred times. This was the first time in your life that you saw your son not having a smart come back ! It was quite something, really ! And oh it was so nice to see your son’s personality making everyone around him beam ! 

When you saw everyone together, gathered in that tiny living room, you wouldn’t believe that just a few hours ago you were all almost perfect stranger ! That this was your first meeting ! 

In fact, it felt like you’d been a family since the beginning of time. That Viggo was yours and Jason’s son, and that you were having his uncles and aunt, and his grandfather, over for his birthday...It really REALLY felt like it. 

It kinda freaked you out, when you realized this, but also made you incredibly happy. Because your boy ? He deserved to have great uncles and aunt, and a grandfather like the goddamn Bruce Wayne ! And most of all...a dad like Jason, who had absolutely no intention to ever leave (he made that clear on your first date). 

But for now, you shook those pleasant thoughts away, a bit afraid you were getting too carried away, and turned to Jason and your boy as it was your boyfriend’s turn to give him a present. Finally. 

“Um, seeing what everyone got you, I’m not sure my present will be that great...”

He says shyly, and you know it was a big deal when none of his siblings teased him about it. The wasn't as big as what his sibling’s or dad got for him, but you were pretty sure it made Viggo almost cry. 

It was just a simple notebook. At first, Viggo was very confused about it...until he opened it. And discovered that inside, all the pages were covered with “personalized gift cards” Jason drew himself.  

It almost made YOU cry too. It was so sweet, and personal, and Jason clearly put a lot of work into it ! It was full of little actives Viggo could do with “The Jason”. Some were simple, like just “a game of catch” or “an afternoon playing Cheese Viking”, while some others were rather big like : “going to see a Baseball match of your fav team at Gotham’s Stadium” or “A week-end in Disneyworld” ! 

Your son gave Jason the biggest hug he ever gave, and refused to let go for quite a while. And when he finally took a few steps from Jay, Viggo whispered :

“Thanks, dad.”

Which made Jason freeze. He was pretty sure he was the only one that heard Viggo used this word, and that the boy himself didn’t even realize what he had just say. What he had just done to Jason’s heart. 

Jason hadn’t felt this happy since before his death. Of course, you and Viggo made him extremely happy those past few months but right now, as the kid called him “dad” in the most natural way in the World...Jason’s heart just couldn’t stop beating. He felt the same way than that day Bruce told him he was going to adopt him. 

But his happiness was cut short by a dark thought slowly casting its shadow in his mind...

Jess.

************

Laying next to you in the bed he found himself sharing with you more often than not now, Jason couldn’t sleep.  

Probably because you went through a lot of emotions today, you were completely out and were lightly snoring next to him, unaware of his inner turmoil. Unaware that he was overthinking everything. Clinging to his arm sweetly. 

Jess’ arrival today, he realized now, touched him more than he initially thought. 

He didn’t want this jerk to slowly crawl in his thoughts, but he couldn’t help it. 

It was all because Viggo called him “dad”, and made him realize that...He wanted to be that kid’s dad. But he couldn’t really, could he ? Because he actually already had a father, and this father came back today, and was finally willing to come into his kid’s life.

Jason couldn't stop thinking about one thing...What if...What if his own father repented ? What if his own father decided to come back in his life, and start anew ? What if his own father didn’t get into the wrong criminal businesses and got killed, and came to Wayne Manor to ask for his son back ? 

Jason was pretty sure he would have forgiven him, because it was his dad. Sure Viggo’s and his situation were different. Jason did live with his father for a while when he was a kid, and with his mother, before leaving for Wayne Manor because they got killed. 

And both his parents were abusive and mistreated him...But still. If Viggo had the chance to have his dad back in his life, shouldn’t he take it ? No matter how much Jess screwed up ? Didn’t he deserve a second chance ? 

Jason couldn’t stop but think about “what if” his own parents got cleaned and came back for him. What if his own parents actually wanted him, and begged him to come back...What would Jason have done ? 

What would he have become ? Would his life get so fucked up ? 

Probably not. He wasn’t mad at Bruce anymore, and he knew that his adopted father loved him deeply...but if eight years old Jason had the choice to have a normal life, with normal parents, and to avoid this world of pain that he had to go through...Wouldn’t it have been fairer to take this chance ? 

If his parents came for him, if they did everything to get better and go on the path of redemption...Jason was pretty sure that he would have gone back to them, and it was a fact that then, he would never have died. He would never have been so angry. He would...

Ugh. It was so complicated. On one hand Jason viewed Bruce as his father, and only him, because he was the only one who ever acted as a father towards him. But what if his own father came back ? Wouldn’t have it been better for him ? 

Jason couldn’t sleep. He kept thinking over and over again about how genuine Jess looked. And how hurt Viggo looked when he threw that gift out of the window. 

Jay was pretty sure he was the only one who noticed it, but for a micro-second, Viggo looked like he was about to cry. Looked like he regretted throwing the gift away. And during his birthday, when he thought no one was looking, the boy kept looking back at the entrance door with a thoughtful look. 

“What if my own parents came back to get me and take care of me ? Would I forgive the years of abuse and would it be best for me to leave  with them to avoid the world of pain Bruce’s life brought me ?”

Sure, Jason willingly jumped into Bruce’s night life. Because for the first time in his life, he found someone that actually cared about him ! He wanted to make him proud ! Plus it was fun...but we all know how that ended. 

He kept thinking over and over again. He knew for a fact that Viggo could NOT come into his vigilante’s world. Ever. But then again, Jason knew he would never stop fighting crime. 

Maybe Viggo and you were better off without him, and instead would have a better chance at a normal life with...Jess ?

It hurt like hell, to realize that maybe that was it. That maybe it was better for both you and your son to stay away from him. 

It’s funny. So far, he had been kind of lying to himself, always thinking that he’d talk about this all Red Hood ordeal one day, in the future. Always saying he’ll tell you all about it “one day”. But never doing so because he knows that as soon as he says the truth, things will forever change. 

You and Viggo will be in danger all your life, just for being associated with him and...goddamnit what was he even thinking ?! That he could just have a family with you ? Be a dad to Viggo ? After only six months of relationship ?! 

He clearly didn’t think any of this through. He wanted, to be that kid’s dad. For the first time in his life he knew he was in love, he knew he wanted to spend his life with you...Six months or six years wouldn’t make any difference, he just knew his feeling would never change. He knew he didn’t want to touch anyone else but you. Kiss anyone else but you. Make love to anyone else but you. 

He knew he didn’t want to give his heart to anyone else but you...You and Viggo. He didn’t want to say anyone else’s name the way he said yours. He didn’t...He knew he would never love again the way he loves you. 

But this wasn’t about only him now, was it ? He couldn’t be that selfish, and thrust you into his dark world like that. What would you say, if you knew how many people he killed ? If you knew he actually died himself, and came back to life ? If you knew...the him from the night ? 

So far, things were blissful. Things were peaceful. Things were beautiful. 

Whenever he came over to your place, it felt like you, him and Viggo were a little family. It felt good, and so easy. 

But...Oh god ! He couldn’t believe he allowed himself to be seen THAT MUCH in public with his BROTHERS that day at the arcade ! When it was just you and him, or you, him and Viggo, it was fine, because he became an expert in being able to hide the fact he was Jason Todd-Wayne, one of Bruce Wayne’s heir. 

But Damian and Tim ? Everyone knew who they were wherever they went. Especially Damian, who looked so much like Bruce and had such amazing feature like his eyes or darker skin !  

Apparently no one saw you all together that day, as no picture had been released but...what if ? Then you would have become the face of every single newspaper in Gotham. Worst, Viggo would have been plastered everywhere ! 

That alone would put your life and your son’s life on the line ! Being associated with such a powerful family was quite something...but then if it turned “Gotham Official” between you two, he would HAVE to talk about Red Hood and then the threat would be doubled...

Jesus. This was all so painful. Everything. This all realization. 

The fact that Jess was now back in the picture and was really Viggo’s rightful father. And this all Wayne/Red Hood thing...He...he couldn’t do that to you, he couldn’t be that selfish...could he ?

You moved closer to him in your sleep, and threw one of your leg over his waist. And it’s with a heavy and painful heart that Jason softly kissed the crown of your head. Tenderly showered your face with peppered kisses...And resolved himself to take a harsh decision. 

************

The next day, you woke up to an empty bed. 

Which was odd. Usually, even if he would he awake before you, Jason would always still be in bed with you...Weird. 

You stood up and went to the kitchen and...here he was. He was making breakfast for Viggo. Cute. But...when he looked at you, did you see a flash of pain going through his eyes ? Or did you just imagine it ? You weren't sure. 

But when you went to kiss him to say “hello”, his kiss back felt strangely distant. Very unlike him. Usually, he would be so into it, and smile widely afterward...

“Ok I made some breakfast for you too. I’m sorry I have to run, I have important business back at home, see you later ?” 

“Um, ok...” 

He leaves with a quick “See ya Viggo”. No kiss goodbye to you, as he always gave you. And no kiss on your son’s forehead either. 

Odd. You and Viggo exchange a knowing look...

************

You tried to remember everything you did with Jason in the past few days that could have changed his mood that much. 

Jesus (Y/N) think, THINK ! 

But you couldn’t recall doing anything to Jason that would justify his behavior...Why, all of a sudden, was he always too busy to see you ? Why would he refuse to go out in public ? Why was he coming over less and less ? 

He kept telling you that is was because there was a lot of work back at Wayne inc but, so far, he always managed to make time for you...or were you just being jealous and too selfish because he spend less time with you ? 

Yes, that was probably it. You were being a kid, this was defenitely nothing and he would eventually stop being so busy. 

************

Jess called you back a few days after Viggo’s birthday, and you told him to fuck off. But he kept calling and calling and calling...

“Maybe you should give him a chance, you know ?” 

Jason’s words surprise you, and you turn a confuse look to him : 

“I told you what he did to us, right ?”

“Yes, but I’m a strong believer in everyone deserving a second chance.” 

His words kept fighting in your head, over and over again...

************

And Jason kept being busier and busier. Having less and less time for you and Viggo. It got even worst when you finally accepted for Jess to come and see you (not Viggo yet) and talk. 

Viggo was at school, and you were talking with Jess in your kitchen when Jason came in...He immediately apologized and though you said Jess was about to leave, Jason still left. 

And oh you hated that judgemental look Jess gave you, as if he was saying : “wow, great boyfriend you got there” ! 

Because Jason was great. He really was ! He was the damn best. He was the perfect boyfriend. He cared for your son, and was always so affectionate towards you ! He always had great thoughts, and was just so sweet ! 

He was perfect ! 

But...you guessed perfection didn’t exist, as you felt you and him were slowly growing apart more and more. 

************

You still refused for Jess to see Viggo, and to be honest, Viggo had no intention to see his dad anyway ! 

Jason heard you guys talk about it, as he came by one night...And the way Viggo’s face brighten when he saw Jay, and how he rushed to hug him finally gave Jason a good idea of what he had to do. 

For yours and Viggo’s good. 

************

He had to. He just had to. 

IT didn’t mean it made anything easier, but he knew it was the only way. 

He had to leave you..both of you. 

He had laid the ground work for a few weeks now, coming to see you and Viggo less often, and being much less attentive and affectionate to you both. 

It particularly tore his heart apart, to see Viggo’s cute little smile fall every time he said “not now buddy” when Viggo asked to play with him ! 

The worst was that time he refused to give him a hug because he said he was “late for work” (a lie), and that other time he said “can’t right now” when Viggo, full of hope, brought his little notebook he got for his birthday and basically tore a random “gift card” from it, clearly not caring what it was, and only wanting to spend time with Jason. 

It really, really hurt, that he had to do that...But at the same time, it was the only way. Because if Viggo was getting to attached to Jason, then he would never want to get to know his real father, Jess. 

If Viggo decided that Jason was his father...then he would eventually get dragged into this dangerous vigilante’s life. And that...Jason couldn’t let it happen. He’d rather die, than putting this little boy’s life in jeopardy. Or yours. 

And though it hurt more than anything in the world, acting that distant and cold toward both you and Viggo, he knew he had to. 

He had to...lay the ground work...To make you guys hate him. 

Make you realize he wasn’t actually a great boyfriend. Purposefully doing things he would never do usually, but doing them just because he knew it annoyed you.

And yet, he couldn’t quite seem to achieve this goal to make you guys even dislike him. Even when he pushed away on purpose; or when he was a bit rude. 

The truth was, he was never able to completely push you two away, or completely be heartless with you. Because he loved both of you with all his heart. 

He was deeply in love with you. And Viggo ? Oh Viggo, he found himself thinking of him as his “son” so many times ! 

But this was dangerous ! You both could never have a real life, if he kept going ! And Jess really seemed to want to get back in your life, and participate in Viggo’s upbringing. And even if he screwed up..maybe he had the right to have a second chance and get to know his own son ? 

Yes. Jason had to do it now. And quick. Rip the band-aid...

*********** 

“Jason, what are you saying ?” 

Your pained look almost convince him to backtrack. To not go forward with it. To tell you it’s just a silly joke and to kiss you with all his might. 

Oh and the look Viggo gives him, sat at the kitchen table, a bowl of cereal in front of him ? It tears him apart. It makes him wish he was still dead. Those innocent eyes slowly realizing that something bad is happening. 

But he can’t go back now. He has to go through with it. For your own good. To both of you...so what if you hate him ? 

“It’s just too much for me, ok ? Too much at the same time, all this.” 

He gestures at you and Viggo, and once again, he has to fight against himself not to go to both of you and give you a hug, apologizing profusely for what he just said and insinuated. 

But he knows...he knows that by using the exact same word Jess used in his letter all those years ago, he’d really break this bond you formed with him. 

“Too much ?” 

You ask, obviously trying to fight tears as you were understanding what the problem was more and more every seconds. 

This was what you feared since you started to date him. What you were terrified of as you realized you were completely in love with him, and that Viggo was getting very attached to (you were pretty sure he almost called him “dad” a few times by now). 

This was your worst nightmare. All over again...The man you love leaving you because a family is too much for him. 

“Yes. You and Viggo. And Jess now too..” 

“What about Jess ?” 

“Well it’s a bit too much ya know ? He’s part of your lives again and...”

“He is not part of our lives. Plus you’re the one that told me to give him another chance !” 

“Yes exactly ! And you did ! Now he’s part of your life wether you want it or not, and he wants to know Viggo so...”

“I don’t want to get to know him Jason, I don’t want to !” 

For the third time, he almost cracks. The tone his little boy just used...”his”. No. No he wasn’t his. He was Jess’s. And it was going to be better for him if the bond between him and Jason was cut. 

“Well you do whatever you want buddy, but ultimately he’s your dad and he wants to know you ! You know, I wish my dad came back for me when Bruce adopted me ! I really do !” 

This was a lie. With all his thinking, Jason came to the conclusion that he would never want another father than Bruce Wayne. No matter how easier his life would have been...But this was his choice, and he already came from a fucked up family and was a delinquent. While Viggo ? Viggo had a bright future ahead of him. 

He was cute and intelligent. He couldn’t come into the vigilante’s world... 

“Where are you getting at with all this, Jason ?” 

You already knew, of course. But you wanted him to say it. You wanted him to spell it out. To face you and tell you. 

“I’m getting at...I mean...I think...I think we should break up.” 

It’s as if someone just threw a bucket of freezing cold water over your head. And without realizing it...You fall on the nearest chair (Jason has to resist like hell for not suddenly running to you and see if you’re ok) and start to cry. 

You don’t even hear what Jason says next, but you know it’s all bullshit. Whatever he says. You know. He’s just trying to be nice and ease the break up, but if you’re being honest, you realized a while ago that he would leave. Because he became suddenly so cold...after Jess’s arrival, really. 

A few weeks ago. 

Since that day Jason became more and more distant. It was weird. It was so different from those past six months ! And you just couldn’t understand why the sudden change of heart...did he think you were going to leave with Jess ? Because he was your first love ? 

But you realized you had never loved anyone before Jason... 

Why was he suddenly...like this ? Didn’t he see you had no intention of ever going back to Jess ? And sure maybe you’ll let him see Viggo because after all yes, maybe he deserves a second chance at that “father’ thing but...couldn’t Jason see that your kid already decided who his real dad truly was ? 

You don’t even realize your son came to you until he presses his small smooth hands on your cheek, and wipe away your tears. 

“I think you should leave.” 

You hear Viggo say to Jason. And you wish you could say something but...you knew it. You knew since day one that if Jason Todd broke your heart, you would be a total mess. Worst than ever. And you really were. 

Damn. You felt so pathetic, moping on your kitchen table while your eight years old son tried to cheer you up. Took care of you. 

“Viggo I...” 

Jason was about to say that he still wanted to see the kid. Still wanted to be friend. He just couldn’t cut all ties, it was impossible...he knew it was a bad idea, but he just couldn’t let you two go. IN fact, he was slowly starting to regret his decision. 

But Viggo, looking up at him with eyes full of unshed tears, and clearly furious, made everything easier for him : 

“I said you should leave. You’ve done enough, don’t you think ?” 

He points at you, who seemed to not even be aware of what is happening around you right now. And oh geez you feel like such an idiot for ever even believing in all this...For believing that a perfect man like Jason could be with you, and help you raise your son the last of the way. For believing that you had another chance at love and at having a normal family. 

“And please don’t come back. Thank you.” 

This is it. This is the day Jason Todd dies a second time. 

He can feel it in his heart. He’s not alive anymore. 

He wants to reach for you, he wants to reach for Viggo...But he doesn’t. Instead, he takes his duffel bag that he prepared the night before, and leaves. Without even turning back once. 

And it’s good that he didn’t, because if he did, his resolve would have shattered. He would have thrown himself on the floor and beg for yours and your son’s forgiveness, say that he wasn’t thinking straight...or tell you the truth ! The all truth ! Why he was leaving right now ! 

Because it’s better for both of you...It’s to save your life...

Oh but if he had turned to look one last time at you, he would have realized he wasn’t saving anything. On the contrary. As you softly cried uncontrollably, not able to get a hold of yourself while you were known to never wallow in self-pity...You always got back up on your feet. Always moved forward. 

For your son. But today...today, even as you see that your tears are really distressing him, you can’t stop crying. Because you feel it in your heart, in your bones...you just lost the love of your life. 

And Viggo ? Viggo, for the first time in his short eight years on this earth, he realizes how painful it is, to not have a dad. 

____________________________________________

Hope you liked this ! It is currently 7 am and I stayed up ALL night to finish this...(while watching the oscars so I got distracted, but said oscars were over two hours ago so...yeah). I hope it’s not too...bad. I must admit, I’m VERY scared to disappoint you...In the end, I’m glad I stayed up so late (or early, depends on the point of view), cause I’m gonna now go hide in my bed.

So. Yeah. Blahblahblah the usual about feedbacks = life, as well as reblogs. 

[50shadesofmittens]

Oh hey I finally did something Rapunzel.

It’s super fucking tropey and looks like a one-way relationship from the context here but oh well have fun. Thanks to @coaxionunlimited for doing the prompt-swap with me that led to this. I needed to write something TTS that was not-fluff and not-humor (too much 3TtD) and this came out, the emotional climax of a 300-page mega-fic that is not yet written

EDIT: I walk away for literally 20 seconds and get better ideas. So there’s been some minor changes to this. since it’s posting

At the base of the silver Tower, on the back of a rented camel, one lone Custodian disguised as a mutant Tzeentch worshipper (read: wearing a paper-mache mask over his helmet and a T-shirt over his armor that proclaims “I <3 Change”) stands planning the next step of his daring assault.

Then a red lasso grabs him and yanks him up to the highest floor, in through a hole in the liquid-solid walls that closes as soon as the Custodian is deposited on the floors.

“Are you insane? Do you realize what will happen if even a single daemon finds you here? I’ve found you here! Tzeentchhas to know by now, and if you’re still here that means this is all one of his plans. Probably to end with your humiliating death or corruption!”

“Nice to see you too, Magnus.” The Custodian groaned as he got up from the floor. “Was that a hair-lasso you grabbed me with?”

“Shapeshifting is the easiest spell for me to cast if I don’t want to be seen.” Magnus replied, his hair rapidly shortening back to its usual length. “Not that it works completely- there are some forces which can, if they/she/it/whatever the squid is right now choose so, can see everything I see. And since I’m on probation/house arrest, again, I’m being watched fairly closely right now. So if we’re going to get you out of here alive-”

“We’re not.” Magnus startled as the Custodian continued, “We’re staying on this planet, and getting the planet out of the Warp.”

“Have you gone completely mental?” Magnus barked out a laugh. “Wait- don’t tell me, I should’ve known  when you thought it was a good idea to come out here, alone, with just yourself and is that a camel?”

“Right behind you.” Sure enough, the camel had followed it’s rider up the tower. This rider gave her many head-pats and good oaty snacks. She liked head-pats.

“The fuck-” Magnus shook his head. “Never mind. The point is, you have to go, before whatever scheme this all is gets too complicated for me to pull you out.”

“And what if sending me away is the scheme? Hm?” The Custodian shrugged. “It’s not like you can prepare for every plan Tz- that one has. Weren’t you the one who decided that it was better to just work with what we had, than to think too hard about how to win?”

“That was a very different scenario. Besides which, I’m not trying to win- I’m just trying to get by. For now,” Magnus added hastily, “once I’m in a better position I can-”

“Stop. Just- before you tell me what your long-term goals, are tell me this: how do you plan to get into this ‘better position’ in the first place?”

“I’ll work with what I have, just like you said!”

“So, what, Tzeentch mentions he wants this subsector conquered, you work on it, get further into his good graces, and just keep going until he’ll let you be free?” The Custodian shook his head. “We both know it’s not going to work like that.”

“I don’t expect it to go that far. I just need enough to make things… better.”

“You’re mixing your goals up. You’re planning too far ahead where you should be thinking about the now, and you make your immediate plans where you should be thinking about the long-term.”

“At least I’m doing something.” Magnus snapped. “Isn’t that enough? I used to just wait, wait, wait, planning every step and making every choice based on a thousand pre-existing factors, until I got too lost in my own head. You helped me break out of that- and I’m grateful, really, I am. I’m so, so glad I met you.

“But please,” and Magnus took the Custodian’s gauntlets into his own hands, “don’t destroy yourself trying to save me. You already have- in more ways than you’ll ever know. If I’m to live with the memories of you as my guide, don’t make one of those memories be your death. That’s not how I want to repay you.

“Go home, [R E D A C T E D]. The other Custodes need their Captain General, and the Imperium needs its leader. Don’t throw all that you’ve accomplished away. I’m not worth it.”

“I’d debate you on several of those points,” the Captain General said, “but for now, I’ll settle on a question: are your sons worth it? Are your people?”

“Don’t.” Magnus pulled away, and he turned away. “Don’t ask that.”

“Magnus.”

“Don’t tell me to choose- between the one thing that’s made me happy and the duty that I’ve only just really started to love again- you know, ever since I got back, I keep seeing all the amazing things I knew before but kept missing or mistaking for something worse. ‘We humans have a peculiar ability to turn the worst, stupidest dystopian situation into stuff we can laugh  grimly at, I appreciate that.’”

“the-nothing-maker, early second millennium assorted internet. Volume, Tumblr.” The Captain General said, “I read you that one.”

“You use my words against me, I use your quotes against you.” Magnus said, though there was no bite in his words. “You know, in the few times I haven’t been alone here, everyone keeps telling me you’re the bad guy. That you were tricking me into neglecting my kingdom so it’d fall into disarray, or were going to tell me to burn it all down so we could start over later.” Magnus sniffed. “It’s all rubbish. There might’ve been some downturns, but the working infrastructure hasn’t exactly collapsed without me- which is more than most daemon planets could say. Besides which, it’s not like I’ve been doing much governing since then.

“And the first offer you make is to save the planet- though if you were a daemon or another Tz-“ The Captain General made a loud noise of protest to keep Magnus from saying the whole name, “-follower, I could buy  that it’s some plan to destroy the planet, but… that’s not you. That’s the farthest thing from you. That’s why I- I can’t sit by while you’re destroyed.”

“Magnus.”

“No just-” Magnus swallowed hard and looked the Captain General in the eye. “Just listen to me. It- it’s crazy but… if I died there would be another war, big fucking whoop it must be Tuesday, but… if you died, I think the galaxy would become a little colder. Because every time I look at you and try to decipher what sort of man you are, I find something wonderful there. Every time. And you can be petty, hypocritical, and cowardly, but even when you are those things that… kindness, that spark that makes you shine is still there. It doesn’t shine consistently, but it never vanishes completely. And… there’s nothing else I’ve seen or heard of in this galaxy that can match that. Not the Gods, not my Father, and certainly not me.”

“Magnus…”

“I know you still think, somewhere deep down, that you’re not worth it, or that you could be replaced. But I’m telling you, you can’t.”

“Magnus.” The Captain General said, louder now, but something scratchy in his voice as though he was pushing back tears underneath the helmet. “I didn’t come here to die. I know you think- that the place you’re in and the person you are makes it impossible to get out but- you keep forgetting one key thing, in the way it most counts. Who you are.

“You’re the person who saved hundreds of thousands of entire civilizations worth of culture and history- through negotiation and diplomacy, and just giving them respect. If it wasn’t you, someone else would’ve done it, and they wouldn’t have been anywhere near as kind. We both know by now that the kindest thing would’ve been to have left the galaxy alone, but that wasn’t gonna happen, so you made it happen your way. No matter what anyone else said, or did, or how they mocked you for it- you did what you thought was right. Just like in the Heresy, your sons were kept from the war because you fought back against the poison in your soul, and kept them as far from the madness as you could.

“You’ve done a lot of evil, I’m never going to argue on that, but you’ve got a lot of drive to do good- and you’ve done a lot of good, over and over, from the moment you got the chance. What you did for me, during [REDACTED]

“[REDACTED]”

“[REDAC-] But you showed me that you want to go farther- and you are going farther, from the twisted paths that came before. You managed to hold out longer than any of your brothers (exceptmaybeMortarionI’mnotclearonthetimeline) when it came to corruption.”

“You...” Magnus said, “are the only person in the galaxy who truly believes that intentions have any value.”

“Maybe that’s because the galaxy doesn’t value people’s hearts enough. That life is so disposable nobody bothers trying to help the hurting. I think that’s bullshit. And Magnus, you stood up with me against the indecisive squid once before, and with your help I won. Now, I’m asking you to stand with me once again.

“Please, Magnus.” The Captain General held out his hand, “trust me?”

And Magnus closed his eye, sighed deeply, shook his head, opened his eye, then reached out and took his hand. “Okay.” He said, voice breaking, “What must I do?”

[bat-lings]

I love everyone in the batfam no matter how problematic, but the Rhato 25 discourse bothered me. As a Bruce fan I didn't like the complete crucifixion of his character by the Jason diehards. Personally I feel Bruce was justified (the brutality felt like a publicity stunt for shock value, which I didn't like), but seeing these same fans (that hate Bruce for daring to hurt their fav) then celebrate when Jason did the exact same thing to Damian in the teen titans annual. It's so hypocritical.

Oh, Anon, I fear you inadvertently put the finger on the exact thing I despise about current storylines. I agree in that they’re taking the shock value too far and that every character suffers for it.

Frankly, I have more of a problem with what the fans are served than with how they reacted to it.

Fair warning, I’m gonna get very critical with the writing of the two events Anon mentioned. I’d be extra interested to hear about those events from the perspective of someone who actually enjoyed them, but it’s not worth your good mood if reading a post basically trashing said storylines upsets you.

I’ll respectfully disagree about Bruce’s behavior towards Jason. It was excessively brutal and nothing justified it. The scene can be summed up to shock value, to the point it would need to be entirely rewritten to exonerate Bruce. Jason relapsed into lethal force for understandable reasons. Even if we consider nothing excuses Jason; even in an alternative scenario where he’d have shot the Penguin out of the blue, Bruce’s behavior would be plain wrong.

Bruce went after him, assaulted him, and kept on beating him while Jason wasn’t defending himself.

Let’s forget this was Jason for a second. This is not the kind of violence Bruce should resort to against any criminal. I don’t just mean that hey, this isn’t ideal morally speaking, I mean that Bruce Wayne, as a character, as the man who was always written to believe in redemption/rehabilitation, as the man who willed never to use lethal or even unnecessary force, can’t do this and pretend to be remotely what Bruce’s character is supposed to represent. I hate it every time Bruce is written to use that kind of empty violence, preboot or reboot. Miller went down that road too and it never fulfilled my idea of entertainment.

Then you add on the fact that Jason’s his son, and it makes it all so much worse. Bruce legit puts the blame on Jason, not only during the confrontation (“I told you if you left me it’d be your choice”), but also in a later issue when Lobdell serves us a disastrous attempt at a reconciliation scene. “I love you but you deserved a kick in the ass.” Like, I don’t think Lobdell could’ve portrayed a more abusive father-figure if he wanted to.

As a comparison, have similar confrontations between Bruce and Dick in preboot.

[Batman (1940) #600]

So here there’s an actual fight. Dick is actively participating rather than being used as Bruce’s punching-ball. Power-wise, they’re equals.

You want a true equivalent to the scene between Jason and Bruce, where Dick suffers from a power-imbalance + Bruce being toxic?

[New Titans (1988) #55]

Note how it doesn’t go further than a punch because it’s bad enough that way and doesn’t need to escalate further to drive the narrative home. There’s no “I love you but you deserved a punch” bullshit later on either.

Even in Teen Titans: Year One where Bruce was particularly terrible (too much imo), he’s brainwashed when he hits Dick and nothing in the story/framing exonerates Bruce for his global behavior.

Those confrontations had a place in their narratives other than shock value. Bruce’s descent after Jason’s death, his mental state in Murderer/Fugitive. They illustrate how fucked up Bruce is at a specific moment due to specific events and context. They’re not casually dismissed afterwards by a hug and a dubious line. And again, they don’t require Bruce to beat Dick half to death to drive their point home.

By the way, this is reconciliation.

[Batman (1940) #605]

This is a component of the circle of abuse.

[Red Hood and the Outlaws (2016) #27]

“I love you. If only you weren’t so stubborn, you wouldn’t deserve an occasional kick in the ass. Like when I inflicted you severe physical trauma. But I love you anyway. Aaah, the woes of father-son relationships!”

There was no narrative reason for Bruce to take it that far with Jason in rhato. It’s just physically more violent and emotionally less impactful, because it’s so damn cheap and because it tries to pass abuse for a normal familial dissension that can be cured with a hug. I can’t get emotionally engaged with that kind of writing.

It’s a reboot, it’s entitled to change characters, but it’s simply not a Bruce I recognize nor one whose existence I’m particularly eager to acknowledge.

As for the Jason-Damian confrontation…

I don’t care that Jason didn’t want to fight and tried so hard to de-escalate the situation until Damian pulled out that mystery drama-box. I don’t care that Damian’s a trained fighter. Frankly, I don’t care about the specifics. At the end of the day, an adult beat the shit out of a child. A child who was framed in earlier appearances to be his little brother. A writer/editorial team/whoever the hell made the conscious choice to put those characters in the specific situation where an adult would beat the shit of a child family member.

You know, for all that I hate TT#29 for its cheap violence (and Jason’s less than ideal portrayal), it at least had the decency to oppose two characters of roughly the same age. And in this continuity, Jason was revived to be a villain. I may not like it but it’s expected that he acts villainous towards the fam, or Tim here. Plus Tim and Jason were never ever portrayed as brothers in post-crisis. They’re strangers. Them beating each other simply doesn’t have the same significance.

Have another preboot parallel where neither perpetrators are villains.

[Red Robin #14]

Here the writer puts Tim in a situation where he has to defend himself against a ten-year-old. There’s a punch, and then the violence stops. That’s it. Much like the preboot Dick-Bruce confrontations, it doesn’t need to be taken further. The story delivers its point without any ten-year-old getting beaten senseless by an older ally.

Seriously, how does this…

[Batman (2016) #16]

…exist in the same continuity as this?

[Teen Titans Annual 1 (2019)]

How is this a good way to portray familial dissensions/confrontations of any kind?

You’re the writer. You decide if the 20 something is gonna throw hands with the 13 year old. You decide how the father figure reacts to the son’s actions. You decide how far each confrontation goes. You decide whether two characters that were explicitly portrayed as brothers are gonna bleed each other out. You decide whether the father figure is abusive. You decide what happens, how it happens, how it’s resolved, and how every element is framed.

Physical violence is just another narrative tool that should be used to construct a story. You can’t just throw it in, dial it up to 11, and hope it’ll make your scene impactful. It just proves you don’t know how to write a vivid scene without relying on cheap tricks.

Anon, I get your frustration, I don’t like what’s done of Bruce either. I made a post about his parental failures in preboot ( bat-lings.tumblr .com/post/180901354160/do-you-think-bruce-was-a-bad-father-im-starting); none of them ever reached rhato’s caricatural empty brutality. Bruce is less and less well received by fans as he’s sometimes instrumentalized in sequences that don’t fit his character. It’s not fair on him.

But I can’t seem to disconnect with what we are given long enough to worry about how we react to it. And to be fair I’ve seen as many posts hating on Jason’s recent actions than hating on Bruce’s.

Tbh bad writing/ooc-ness aside there’s little anyone can say to exonerate either character here. The fans are reacting vividly because they’re faced with a story that has little else to sell other than vivid brutality. We all go “gasp!”, pick sides, and that’s it. It’s hard to breed interesting discussion among fans with that configuration.

The good news is, each of those characters have seen better days, and not everything in reboot is as bad as the above sequences. Also we have fanfictions :D

[firebirdsdaughter]

Hey…

… Hey, wireless?

F YOU.

Okay. Thank god for common sense. I accidentally lost my post bc my wireless conked out.

HOWEVER!

I was wise, and copied the contents. so we have lost nothing but the tags. Which weren’t that interesting any way.

So here we go!

In no order: (also, I apologise for any typos my fingers decided they wanted to type a mile a minute… DX)

Aw, Naohisa (still thinking I’m spelling his name wrong) is giving them science lessons…

That Melto loves and Asuna doesn’t get… XD It’s okay Asuna, I’m not sure I understand, either.

Melto’s so starry-eyed, gods love him. XD

ASUNA.

Aw, Tyramigo. It’s okay, Melto, he doesn’t mean it meanly. ^^

They’re really cute though. XD

I guess Kou got the idea to see the world in his head from watching tv…

But I feel like there are better places to get into the river than jumping over this railing…

THAT LITTLE BLINK BEFORE HE SAYS ‘209’ XD

He’s clearly got no idea why that’s shocking. ^^

UI DON’T JUST ACCEPT THIS! DX

I guess she decided that she couldn’t really tell a 209 year old what to do…

This episode officially made me conclude that Ui and Touwa are the smols. They’re the youngest of the siblings. Kou is next, then Melto and Asuna are like… Twins who are slightly older than him. No one can agree which one of them is older. Banba is obviously the eldest and stuck managing them. Maybe until Gold gets here. Unless he’ll have to manage Gold, too.

Touwa’s fast, but Banba outweighs him… A for effort, though, sweetie. <3

To continue reading foreshadowing in everything… I wonder if Touwa commenting he doesn’t think Banba can lose in one v one means we’re eventually going to see just that happen.

Or, potentially, maybe Banba did once lose to someone in one v one?

Or both?

Touwa, honey, I just want you to know I very much support the concept of you and the others just tackling your brother. Like Merry and Pippin w/ Boromir. Just jump him. He could use the hugs.

Banba gazes majestically off into the distance as he prepares to be angsty.

Banba: ‘People will always betray you.’

Me: ‘Who did this to you? SHOW ME SO I CAN STAB THEM W/ THIS FORK TEN MILLION TIMES???’

I so want whoever hurt him like this to be an absolute dickwad and I want to see them get their asses kicked, esp by some truly pissed off little sibs.

By Banba, too, absolutely. But I would kill for an ep where the kids find out what this person did and go on a roaring rampage of protectiveness for their big brother. TT^TT DX

Touwa definitely doesn’t know what happened… DX I think he knew Banba was distrusting towards others and very much a loner, but he looks so sad and confused that I don’t think he knew it went this deep…

I wanna hug my little green gremlin son, too! DX I WANNA HUG ALL OF THEM!

Eh. I’m sure she’s fine.

Mook suit actors, the unsung heroes of any and all Sentai. XD

Hey, Green final slash! And Black again. ^^

XD Touwa. Banba’s just like ‘irritated growl.’ ^^

I’m… Pretty sure Ui just insulted this guy…?

Okay, here’s the thing. I don’t see nobody glowing green and losing life force. So… Did they just decide not to put that effect in, or… Or did the Minusaur actually come from someone else?

Like… Tall Cheese?

Ahem. Sorry. I mean Fita.

Though she’s not glowing either… Augh. I dunno what I’m saying.

Why would they chain up Ui, but not Kou?

Well done, Kou. ^^ Boy’s clever is a fight. XD

… What the heck was that boise and dramatic shot of her face? Where they just trying to remind us she’s an idol? I think it happened when the brothers find her, too… Does it mean something? Hmm… I dunno.

Kou’s reaction is hilarious, though.

Ui’s neck is gonna hurt later… DX

Okay, but later the brothers wake her up just fine? I guess the effects were only temporary… That’s probably why they chained them up, so that they couldn’t escape even when they woke up.

And… Kou’s sense ends here. Why didn’t you call the others, you dork? XD

Hmm… I miss Tankjoh, but I kinda like the new guy’s music…

I think he’s meant to be a drastically different personality. Where Tankjoh was surly and serious, this guy is bombastic and childish.

These are the most badass children I have ever seen.

Actually, that’s not true, but, they’re up there.

I’m wonder if it’s an effect of the brainwashing.

I love that girl in the lavender sweatshirt who just goes for the spinning kick. XD

Touwa probably bothered Banba until he agreed to bring her here. XD Which may have been easier bc Banba probably didn’t want to have to deal w/ her…

Melto thinking ‘oh, crap, she’s pretentious, the only way we’re gonna get her to talk is… *sigh* okay, someone has to take this bullet, it might as well be me…’

Honestly, though, I think the only other person who would possibly be willing to do that is Touwa, and probably not. Asuna wasn’t taking well to getting ordered around, and Banba would never kneel to anyone (… Well… Actually, no comment). My interpretation is that Melto realises she’s rather high and mighty, and that she’ll respond to an act of 'reverence’ like that, and he knows no one else in the room is gonna be willing to do it w/out complaining. So he just steps in to save them all the trouble. Mom friend to the rescue.

Honestly, it’s very sensible of him. ^^

I need to write more w/ Melto… DX

Banba is the back modelling. Bc boy can’t be in a single scene where he isn’t posing in some way at every opportunity.

XD I WAS RIGHT. ^^

Sorry Short Cheese, Banba doesn’t care if you think he has manners (I wouldn’t be surprised if he tried to ditch her in the forest earlier XD). Touwa looks slightly miffed, but I think he’s less effected by it coming from you. The only one you’re offending is Asuna. And, actually, I’d advise against that.

Hey, isn’t Asuna also technically a noble?

Asuna’s like ‘First off, how dare you? Second, how dare you? And third… How dare you?’

XD This is even funnier bc of one of my casual ships. ^^

Melto hates this so much, but he’s willing to do it to find out what’s happening. XD Poor baby.

Oh, okay. So the mind control is just his thing.

This is so vague I can’t trust it… I mean, I guess most of it could be on the level, but… Hm. I gotta wonder if they were allowed to escape… And what exactly he’s got on them to have them still be doing this? (Bc next ep pretty much reveals they’re trying to trick the team) Is Short Cheese mind controlled? Is Tall Cheese? They repeat her ‘I would risk my own life to save her’ twice this ep, so I’m guessing Tall Cheese/little sister’s life is still in danger somehow…? I dunno. I guess we’ll learn this weekend.

So… What, you can just teleport? Why didn’t you do that when you were running before? SUSPICIOUS?

Also, I’m not sure I trust these flashbacks either, bc they’re from Short Cheese’s point of view, and next ep indicates she wasn’t being on the level w/ the team. I mean, she’s holding that orange rock in a bottle… But… Did it come from her planet? Is it something they stole from the Druidons? Or is there a part of this story that was left out (actually, that much is obvious bc Short Cheese didn’t mention the rock at all), where the Druidon gave it to her? Too many variables, even if I didn’t know they were up to something.

I should note that it’s pretty obvious they’re not actually evil and are being forced into doing this. They’re only here as guest stars and they’re being promoted as being idols (exhibit A, the abrupt song sequence coming up), so I HIGHLY doubt they’re gonna pull out the rug and make them outright evil.

And, anyway, the next ep preview practically confirms that. XD

Girl in the lavender sweatshirt is ready to kill something, I swear.

I also like the boy in the burgundy and white sweatshirt. XD He’s paying such good attention. ^^

Asuna’s offended, Melto’s somewhere else thinking about Wyzul, Banba doesn’t care and Touwa’s in. XD

Touwa clearly here thinking ‘dear god, I know I never want to go through that… O_o’

Honey, I am so sorry, but I make no promises. DX

That’s a very direct question, but no less then I’d expect from Banba. Though also… Kinda odd? What are you trying to establish here, sweetie? Why are you asking this?

This line is very important, clearly. They repeat it twice. Pretty sure it’s to make us understand that whatever is going on next ep, it’s bc the sisters are trying to protect each other. Like I said, I’m presuming that Tall Cheese is actually still in danger somehow.

WHAT WAS HE TRYING TO ESTABLISH W/ THAT QUESTION? And then he just accepts her answer? I’m confused…

I really can’t tell if he’s finding something odd w/ this, or if he’s accepting it bc he’s sympathising w/ her… DX Tatsuya is being unreadable too well! DX

And then she… Just starts singing? Like, I love this show, but… There could’ve been a better lead up to that.

Though I do love Naohisa reacting to the lights. XD

So… Was this just a random musical interlude, or… Was she doing something? I guess it was so that Kou could hear it and make the connection, but the execution could have gone a little better.

Banba takes that extra moment to pose. XD

Untransformed fight! ^^

I love how Banba just delays transforming to take off. :D

I needed to use a new emoticon.

Kou’s little ‘Ah!’ and pointing when the kids show up! XD

Girl in the lavender sweatshirt is going to cut something.

See, this is an effective use of the singing.

Uh… What. Melto, what does that… Whatever. Sentai logic.

Now he says ‘Okay, Tyra!’ instead of just ‘Tyra!’

SOMEONE TEACH HIM TOUWA AND BANBA’S NAMES!

Banba would be SO AWKWARD. XD

Oh, NOW you transform. XD Well, we wouldn’t have had that beautiful weapon toss if you had before. ^^

See? We bring up the line again, and there’s a weird sound cue? Does it mean anything?

Touwa sees the other smollest sib and must immediately go help her. XD

I do like the improve mobility of this mech. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely adored the clusterfuck of orbs that was the Kyuranger mecha, but… It’s nice to seem something more dynamic once in a while?

Kudos the new suit actor, too. Whose name still escapes me… DX

Convenient train tracks. XD Sentai logic.

Actually, just Toku logic.

I love MirNeedle and his honk and his spinning attack. XD

Could you be more tsundere in one sentence???

Touwa’s just like ‘stages of realising your brother is a tsundere, stage 3: acceptance’

Kou doesn’t mind, though. XD

I do think Banba is starting to kind of like the trio, but boy is very damaged and the concept scares him, so he’s trying to fight it as much as possible, even though it’s just kind of a slight, vague fondness at this point.

Like, eventually, he’s going to end up adopting them, it’s going to happen, he’s going to have at least four younger sibs, actually five. But we’re not there quite yet.

I would love a ‘we’re not each other’s only family anymore’ sort of thing from the brothers. Or maybe one of the trio telling them that. XD

One day, a Mosasaurus will be in that empty spot, I bet.

Melto and Banba on the same wavelength. ^^

So… The Minusaur host is dead now?

This is cute, but I already know there’s more to this.

XD Oh, Banba. You’re starting to like them, I know you are. You’re not getting out of this. Though I do get why you really don’t want that to happen.

Though I do think his getting emotional next week is a partially due to it. ^^ Like, yes, there’s the fact that he’s mad at Kou for being too trusting, and that it might be dangerous for all of them/earth, but… I dunno. Probably overthinking.

But I’m gonna wax on about that shot in the preview later, don’t worry. XD

Or worry, if you don’t want to hear my rambling. In… Which case why would you even be reading this.

Melto on point again. XD I really need to write more w/ you… DX

Though on the other hand, I guess there’s a possibility that she could have read it in Naohisa’s papers at the house, or he said it to her. But she didn’t seem interested in the research, and they could just ask Naohisa if he mentioned it.

Hm… Maybe they’re waiting to update the ED until Gold gets here.

Why does Kou have the inflation Soul activated?

… That sounds like he knows way  more about economics than he actually does. XD

As far as the preview, I like the drama that seems to be happening. ^^ Maybe they’ll finally give us some slightly more concrete info on what happened to Banba. Or just… Anything about the brothers’ past? And what about that hooded person? The sisters are up to something, but they’re obviously being forced into it somehow, Wyzul is definitely the sneaky type. We’re also heading into May, which means DimeVolcano and possibly Gaisorg/Gaisoulg? Though he wasn’t in any of the scans so even if his figurine is releasing, we likely won’t be seeing him until the very end/month after.

Pleasedon’tbeGoldpleasedon’tbeGoldpleasedon’tbeGold.

There are so many better possibilities. DX I know who I want it to be (even though I don’t strictly know ‘who’ that is XD), but there are other possibilities too.

And while I would like to see next ep, I am also curious about the arc coming after it. I really wanna know if my crazed visual analysis madness was right about it only being the kids who are trapped in Wonderland and Banba is trying to get them out. I wanna know.

Hm… Does anyone know where the ‘newspaper summaries’ come from? Like, we got the ones from 5 to 7… Are we gonna get ones for 8 to 11 at some point?

I am an impatient baby. DX ^^;

That’s all folks! Virtual chocolate eclairs for anyone who read all that. But, actually, that’s not all! I still wanna ramble about something—namely, and silly personal theory/hc of mine.

Bc of this face:

Okay, so. During that conversation where Banba did the whole ‘Kindness can make one weak’ thing, I mentioned that I found Kou’s reaction interesting? Bc it might’ve been in his characterisation to get mad and insist that kindness does not make people weak—esp since he clearly still doesn’t think that. But instead, he just looked a little hurt, and looked sad? Like… It seemed to me he was more saddened that Banba thought that way at all than being offended by the statement. Not ‘how could you think that?!’ but more… Like ‘that’s so sad that you’ve been made to believe that?’ If that makes sense? That somehow, Kou caught on that Banba has this view bc he was hurt terribly in the past? And then there’s this face here. Boy looks like a sad puppy. It’s totally my skewed interpretation bc I had that thought before, but to me it looks like he’s looking at Banba like… Empathetically? Like he pities him? So now I’m falling even deeper into the idea that Kou doesn’t find Banba’s distrust of others insulting of offensive in anyway, but is just sad for the fact that someone could come to think that way. Realises that Banba is like this bc he got hurt and is scared, and is just heartbroken by that? That someone could get hurt so badly that they lose faith in nearly all goodness in the world? I might like it if there’s a moment where Kou proves he’s more thoughtful than he seems (like, he can be thoughtful, he has his moments—though he is still an impulsive, goofy doofus) by, like, outright asking Banba what happened to him. That’d def throw Banba for a loop, I think. This is, of course, just my overthinking and incoherent rambling. But I do like the idea. ^^ Last note: my god Tatsuya has pretty eyelashes! DX

[skythedark]

Finally it was break, and Terasaka came up to me and pulled me out of the class, we leave the room and he pinned me to the wall.

“If you wanted to get my attention, you just had to ask. You don’t have to get so close so fast.” I said smirking, but i saw on his face that he meant business

"You think your so special, just because your some trained assassin. Well your not, your nobody. Anyone in this class could take you down even me.”

“Really?! You?!!? You want to fight ... me?!? Dam you really are stupid.”

“What? Did you hear a word i just said? Your worthless! A weapon that as soon as they are done with will just throw away, nothing more than a toy for the government. I doubt you beloved twin sister loves you enough to save you from me, she would be t.tt..tto tt...ttt...terrified.” He said taunting me, and it worked.

“Don’t you dare bring Kana into this!”

I just looked at him and let my emotions flow. It reminded me of being back in fairy tail, and i survived it once i can do it again. I winced as he punched me in the gut, pushing me back a bit. I fell to the ground, and made him think he was hurting me, just a little. But as he came over to get another blow in i grabbed his hand and threw him on the ground. I stood over his body and gave a small chuckle before glaring at his friends, who were all in shock, staring at me like idiots. I reached down towards his body and gripped his throat tightening it slowly, giving him less and less air, pulling him off the ground so he was hovering about an inch of the ground.

“This is how you and me are different.” I start “i have been trained my entire life to kill, before that i survived countless torments and bullying for being “weak” and “worthless” and you” i put his feet on the ground and push him against the wall, still holding onto his neck “ you are just a jealous asshole who is to weak to accept his own insecurities so he has to take it out on others! Am i right?” I turn to his friends “did i get it right?”

he tried to push me off but his strength was weak compared to mine, the doors bursted open and karma looked worried for once, Nagisa ran to the teachers lounge to get Karasuma ,

“ there’s no point in running to the teachers for this one!” I say almost out of my mind, “the only person who can stop me now is kana of someone else from my family.”Karasuma ran down the hall and did his best to get me off Terasaka but in the end only bought him a few minutes to run away. I took off my ring with no regrets and let the power flow back into me it felt amazing, i hadn’t had this much power since the start of school, i gave a test run by making all the lights flicker in the building, and then flooding them with electricity making them glow brightly until they shattered! That made kana rush to the door and stare in disbelief in what she saw, I was trying ti think clearly focus my thoughts on what i wanted to do, but It was like my thoughts didn’t matter anymore only impulses, only killing. I can heard kana trying to call after me, but it was to late. I dropped my ring next to kana and ran off, chasing Terasaka, i wanted to hunt him, i wanted to hurt him, i wanted to kill him, and it felt wonderful.

Just a little paragraph from a short book im writing, the paragraph is a rewrite and i feel its much better, but there is always room for improvement. Maybe i’ll even add the whole story on here? Maybe.

But thanks if you read this and if you could give me some feedback on whta could make it better, that would be much appreciate!

[paradoxidolatry]

Brotherly Love

@birdhole , @beatconductor a lil bit

TG: hey TG: sup

TT: Hey. TT: Not much.  Lunch break at work. TT: Sup?

TG: oh thats sweet TG: sucks theres no free pizza in it when you work as a cop huh TG: i guess its overall kind of a step up from the pizza gig tho

TT: Right? Free donuts though. TT: But nah, yeah, not so bad. TT: Didn't get a chance to tell you about it but I figure Dave or whoever's already spilled those beans. TT: Kinda weird, right?

TG: yeah dave told me TG: donuts just like a real cop huh TG: still cant quite wrap my head around this cop thing tbh TG: i can see you working as a LOT of things but a cop? thats wild

TT: Yeah. TT: I mean, I figured.  Got all that military experience, right? TT: But I didn't want to go back to the military. TT: Plus, working as a cop is an equal mix of 'keeps me active' and 'allows me to work around certain roadblocks in regards to the acquisitions business', so it was a good compromise. TT: Better than fast food and skin flicks again, at any rate.

TG: i mean i guess that makes logical sense n all TG: still fucking wild as shit to me TG: guess you can still wear a uniform even its obviously not as sweet as the fast food ones

TT: Yeah, I really miss that old greasy apron. TT: But what can you do?

TG: the grease just made your eyes pop in that special way ykno TG: chicks love it

TT: They fuckin do, don't they? TT: But somethin tells me you didn't message me to talk about the chicks missing my pizza funk.

TG: you sure about that? its a pretty great topic you could write a book on it become rich quick with your pick up tips

TT: Hey, I'm already on chapter 7: the Sausage Party. TT: But really though. TT: What's up, boss?

TG: nothing TG: i was just TG: thinking about you is all

> Heart, squeeze. TT: That right? TT: Cool, cool. TT: Was thinking about you earlier too, actually.

TG: oh? any reason or

[Dave txt @ bro] im watching u [Dave txt @ bro] > that chicken image

TT: Just, y'know. TT: Was outside on a smoke break and I saw a couple of pigeons hanging out, eating some sandwich or some shit on the sidewalk and like. TT: Got me thinking about you, and like. TT: I spent the past 13 years thing you're dead or some shit, and now you're alive and it's. TT: Just fuckin buck wild. TT: Pardon me for sound fucking sappy but it's kind of like a dream come true.

[TT > Dave: I'm behaving, dad.]

TG: ...am i a pigeon now? tho i do admit i would eat that floor sandwich(edited) TG: yeah its...its fucking wild huh? TG: kinda thought id never see you again even after TG:  i got away and shit TG: idk why not like you up and died but? after looking for you and you werent there i dunno i guess TG: i thought you just TG: werent going to come back TG: ...you didnt even see my wings yet you dont get to relate me to birds just yet dude

TT: I mean, I saw them in a picture. TT: One of you and Dave and a bunch of trolls and some old dude in front of a candy cane dildo? TT: But also you post about birds and shit all the time, so I figured that was sort of your Thing now. TT: And ... well.  I dunno. TT: Almost didn't. TT: I was just gonna stay on Earth, maybe pop in to visit every so often. TT: But then all that shit happened and Dave wasn't answering my messages, so I thought he was dead too, and...well. TT: I guess I'm, uh... grateful to the apocalypse for.  I guess bringing you back to me? TT: Well, no. TT: But like, at least letting me know you're alive.

TG: oh...yeah thats TG: thats my sisters actually and uh..shit what even is grig? grandpa i guess TG: already know mr d after all TG: i mean... im not sure how i feel yet TG: i guess im sorta glad because TG: i mean it has been my embarrassing dream to play family with you again for a while TG: i want to be a family again TG: a lot TG: its just TG: hard

TT: Sisters, huh?  Well damn, you got the whole family package with these folks, huh? TT: Nice.  How long you been with them? TT: Yeah, I figured. TT: I didn't, and don't, make it easy. I know. TT: A lot easier when you were a baby, even if our folks were shit, just cuz, y'know. TT: Everything hadn'tt happened yet. TT: Hadn't started to completely fuckin lose my mind and treat you like dogshit. TT: But I mean.  I dunno. TT: I'm not gonna force you or nothin. TT: But if you ever wanted to come backto the apartment and chill for a day, see how you feel about it? TT: That'd be uh. TT: That'd be really nice.

TG: 3 years TG: as long as ive been TG: away from scratch... TG: i..yeah i guess maybe TG: can you even handle seeing me get gay with dave tho

TT: God.  You were with Scratch that whole fuckin time? TT: Fuckin sonnuvabitch refused to tell me what he did with you. TT: Anyway. TT: Handling y'all and your homogay is a small price to pay at the end of the day. TT: Even if it's still. TT: Kinda really weird from my perspective. TT: But I respect y'all and he takes good care of you, so I can't complain too much, right?

TG: ...yeah like ten years TG: kinda fucked up huh TG: ill..ill think about it TG: okay so im gonna be real with you here for a sec okay TG: i TG: messaged you because i was talking to dave and i realized i missed you and TG: that i TG: kindawantahugiguess

TT: ...Yeah? TT: I can do a hug, yeah. TT: Where are you?  I can meet you, if you wanna.

TG: ...workin TG: at [coords] TG: dont arrest me mr officer these drugs are prescription

TT: I'll leave the cuffs in the car. TT: What happens off-duty stays off-duty, though, so. TT: See you in five.

TG: kay > Try not to freak out. Freak out anyways.

> Pull up by the curb a short walk away and park. > Look, you even pay for the parking meter and everything. > Step out of the car in your full uniform and approach Sock, one hand in  your pocket, the other raised in a wave hello.

> Oh god, he really fucking is a god damn cop. That's so damn weird. God. > Not as weird as randomly meeting up with him for a hug though. Damn it that was the dumbest idea. > You wave back, trying hard to look cool and not like you are dying on the inside and failing miserably.

> You stride up alongside him and... ...well, now what, actually. > Neither of you are very good at this kind of planning, are you. > Damnit, Striders. "Hey." > Now just to... > ... > Open your arms up? > Yeah.  That's how hugs happen.

> Oh god, he's going right for it.Oh god. Not even small talk or anything really bro? > Maybe that's better anyways because god know you don't know what to say. "Hey." > You take a deep breath and you...Go for the fucking hug. Squeeze that big bro tight.

> Aww shit here it comes and here he is.  All up and hugging you. > Actually, that's uh. > That's real nice. > You wrap your arms around him and pull him in for a good, tight hug. > It's probably not the most comfortable thing, what with your radio strapped onto your chest and name plates aand shit, but. > At least for you?  This is a fucking good hug. > (Don't you dare tear up in public.)

> You don't really care about the cofort level of this, it's something you've been craving for 13 years now, a little radio isn't going to stop you from enjoying it. > It's nice. It's familiar, like all the good parts of Bro you've been missing wrapped up for you in one big huggable form. Easy to forget all the shit for a moment. > But the moment does end and when you pull away you have to wipe at you eyes like an idiot. "Uh...Th-thanks."

> Aww, shit goddamn.  He's teaaring up too under those glasses. > You swipe one knuckle under your shades, and you take a steaadying breath. "Hey, yeah, no problem." > Breathe easy, Strider.  You glance up for a moment as you see a fatass snowflake come drifting down, then you look to Sock again. "Hey, you wanna maybe grab some lunch with me?  Haven't eaten yet and it's still my break, so."

> Well at least you are both sappy motherfuckers now. > Oh. You didn't expect that. You think about what Dave told you earlier "Stay in control" and promptly decide to fuck that advice because shit. You are already here. You already went for it like an idiot. "Yeah sure. Gonna have Donuts like a proper cop?" > You make such a face at the snow. Ugh, you didn't really prepare for that kinda weather, fuck.

> You snort a laugh and give your flat stomach a pat. "Gotta work on that signature cop gut, don't I? C'mon." > You gesture behind you with a jerk of your thumb. "Hop in up front.  You can pick the place."

"Hell yeah you do. You look like a fake ass striper cop dude." > You get into the car and immediately get the seatbelt. Doesn't feel safe otherwise. You don't really like cars still but you can't pin point why. It's just a weird personality quirk yeah? But you are used to being in one at this point of your life. > Just drive carefully. Please.

> You hop in and buckle up too, both pleased and a litttle saddened that you didn't even need to remind Sock to put on his seatbelt. > Poor kid. > Luckily, you are an impeccably safe driver, and the drive to Wherever is smooth and uneventful.

> Old habits die hard. > You feel kind of awkward in the car with him, it's too silent for our tastes. > You get out of the car at whatever this amazing food place he's taking you is. Fingers crossed for fast food- "Y'know kinda funny. Always figured my first frive in a cop car would be because I'm getting arrested."

> You snort a laugh.  It's Sock's old favorite pizza place. > God you hope he still likes this shit. > Also this wasn't a Pizza Pimp before, was it?  It was Gino's-- > Wait. > Ugh, well, maybe Dave's not at work. "If you're planning on getting arrested, you're doing this pushing thing wrong, kid."(edited)

> Oh the Pizza Pimp. Fucking score. Maybe Dave is there, that would be rad. "I didn't say I was, I said I didn't think I'd ride a cop car otherwise. Your hearing getting bad?" > You immediately freeze after saying that. Oh man, actually sassing Bro though? Please don't hit me.

> Dave is unfortunately not there, but he sure would love to.

> You catch that freeze, and you... > You snort a little, before pointing to your ears. "Too many concerts and phat-ass beats.  Knew I shouldn't have gotten all up and personal with those speakers.  Who knew the grown-ups were right about that?" > You smile, and it's a little awkward cuz you sure as hell have never been the smiling type, before you hold open the door for him. "C'mon, before we freeze our asses off."

> Oh. Okay. It's cool. It's chill. In a quite literal sense even so you get your silly ass inside. > A smile though? You haven't seen your brother smile in...far longer than you haven't seen him for sure. > That little scare knocked the speech right out of you though so you just awkwardly sit down at the next best table, suddenly really not sure how good of an idea this was.

> You take a seat opposite him, and when the server approaches, you order yourself a water instead of a soda. > Who are you, even. > You glance over the menu, humming softly.  Some of these item names... fitting for a place called Pizza Pimp. "You wanna split one, or do individuals, or?"

> Who is he indeed. You order a black coffee instead of apple juice though, so maybe the traditional Strider beverages are just staying outside today. "Uhhh..Not super hungry honestly I don't mind sharing one." > You haven't been able to eat a whole pizza at once in a while but you don't say that.

"Alright.  We'll split a medium and you can take the rest home if you want." > You let him pick the toppings too.  This really is a strange Strider day.

> The strangest. Do they have nuggets as topping because you want that.

> They might have like, baked chicken, which is kinda like nuggets and also? Is Carro-approved.

> Do you think the pizza pimp doesn't have a nugget topping what kinda fool do you take Dave for.

> A big one. >:3

> LISTEN Nuggets have been added like at least two months ago. Cock Special.

> Goddamnit, Dave.

> Sock loves Dave and the Cock Special Pizza. Prepare ya taste buds Bro.(edited)

"One Cock Special with extra cock please" > Yes, this is exactly how you order.

> Oh your face. > You're so fucking proud.  Dave sure is your little brother, and so too is Sock. > Bless these fucking kids.

"Hope you like it, it's my fav." > Both the pizza and you know.

> Yeah.  Yeah, you know. "Sure I will." > Snort a laugh. "This sure isn't Gino's anymore, huh.  You remember that place?"

"Oh yeah. Man..That's been a while. Clover gifted the place to Dave what? 2 years ago?" > Back when you were on a no homo basis. Memories.

> [Clover: nya face]

"Used to be your favorite, but maybe that's because it was free when I worked here. ...Clover?"

"I'm always a slut for free food but I still digged their shit later. Oh uh..Yeah. Little green guy? 4 of the Felt?" > Should..You now have mentioned that?

> [Dave] Oh no.

> There's this shift in your face.  It's not a frown, but a certain tightening of your lips as you're hit with the full brunt of what Sock just said. "...Dave's...doing business with the Felt?"

> WHOOPSIES >Oh. Oh, oh, oh shit. You fucked up. You didn't really think about that when you said it. At all. Shit. Fuck. Damn. "Hahaha whaaaat? Noooo. Of course not! He'd never uh...Clover is just y'know his uh... Sugar daddy yeah. Cash money man, can't say no to that even from a greenie right?" > Well it's not entirely a lie. You are sweating though.

> You paw at your face and you sit back in your seat, eyebrows knit together tightly. > Looks like you're going to have to have a little talk with Dave when you get home. "...No, guess not.  Desperate times and all that, right?"

"Yeah exactly! Haha..." > God this is uncomfortable. You are going to warn Dave but you already feel like shit. Fuck. "Don't...Don't hurt him okay?" > There's fear in your eyes now. Not for you but for your boyfriend, which is so much worse in your eyes.

> That snaps you Right out of your bad thought spiral and you quickly wave your hand. "Hey, no, no.  Not gonna hurt him.  It's chill." > There's that smile again, even if it's uneasy and a bit green around the gills.  Your brother and the Felt... "Really.  Just surprised he hadn't mentioned it before now."

> [Dave] GUESS WHY.

" 'kay..." > He probably hadn't mentioned it for a reason. You couldn't have known Dave wasn't supposed to do business with the Felt but you still feel like shit. It makes sense in hindsight and considering your history of course but...You just plain didn't know. > The Pizza arrives but you suddenly don't feel very hungry at all, sipping on you coffee awkwardly instead.

> You're, similarly, not hungry, but you've got to salvage this.  Not telling when or if Sock will agree to see you again after this. "Sorry, I just... Y'know, getting offered a gift by those guys.  If they had snatched Dave too..." > You shake your head, and sigh it off.  Out with the bad. "But they didn't, and that's that.  So." > You take up a slice of the pizza and you point is casually at Sock, an eyebrow quirked. "What're you out there peddling?"

> Oh. You'd really rather not follow that line of thought, yeah.  Smooth topic change. "Dude, don't think I should be discussing that with a cop in a pizzeria. Mr D would murder me man."

"Hey." > You make a show of taking off your badge and laying it upside down on the table. "Off-duty, not a cop.  So is it the good shit, or is it like, oregano in a dimebag being passed off as weed."

"We're still in public man." > And you don't want to piss off your Dad on top of the shit you just pulled.

"Yeah, yeah.  Weren't you in public anyway?" > You chuckle a little and you point toward the kitchen area. "Your big bro used to sell shitty dimebags out of there, way back.  Dealt to all the line cooks."

" Course you did." > You roll your eyes behind your shades. "What you want an inventory list? Okay I'll just tell you my favorite product aight? Kinder Überraschungseier......The surprise is Cocaine." > Huh, sure did slip into your mother tongue there. Welp..

> Okay.  You actually laugh then. "You're selling Kinder Überraschungseier full of Cocaine.  Shut the fuck up, seriously?" > You're nodding approvingly now. "That's a fucking great idea.  Where the fuck'd you get the chocolates, though? Make them yourself?"

> That makes you feel..really proud? Huh. You can't stop the big dorky grin from spreading on your face. "Best idea I ever had, honestly. I'm importing them from earth, duh. Along with a bunch of other banned sweets and shit. Who the fuck thought peeps are illegal anyways?"

> You balk at that and you laugh again. "Peeps are illegal here-- wait, shit, right." > Smack your forehead. "That's my job to know that now.  Wow, fuckin fire me now."

"Maybe I should show you my stock, just as a reminder. A fucking lot of dumb shit is. Fucking Lattes were banned man. Until the King unbanned them just for Jude which is honestly so fucking stupid. Way to play favorite, just like royalty should am I right? Not that I'm complaining, love me a big fat Latte." > Man it's...Nice to be able to make that kind of shit tier level german dick joke and to know you're gonna be understood just fine.

> You snort your water and you pull a face,but you're clearly goofing around a loving it. "Fucking nasty, dude.  I don't need to hear about your love of big hot fuckin Lattes."

"Aren't you glad the prospitian monarchy digs a steaming hot Latte too? What a life that would be otherwise." > You snort yourself.

"Jesus christ.  Fuckin whities, dude." > You stuff some pizza in your mouth and you talk withyour mouth full like the fat nasty trash you are. "Can you believe I have to work with them?  Like what the fuck."

"The Queen gives me the creeps with her I love everyone bull. And the King seems like a huge fucking idiot so...Congrats man. Jackpot."

"Not had the chance to meet either, but this is the closest I've gotten to infiltrating the corrupt government yet.  Maybe if I keep my shit up, I can finally overthrow them from the inside." > You are entirely dead seriouus.

"What's the masterplan? Shoot them in public?" > You aren't but you also don't mind the topic. Not a fan of these guys.

"Nah, nah, nothing like that.  Too messy.  Besides." > You gesture at the scar that runs oveer your eyes. "Never been a fan of guns."

"I know." > Hell maybe you should be grateful he ain't. Swords fucked you over bad enough. "Seems like a popular approach is all. Like historically or whatever. But I guess you gotta go for something less stale huh?"

"Of course.  Flashy's the only way to be when you're taking out a corrupt system of government."

"Looking forwards to the show Bro." > Except you hope he's fucking joking.

> You totally fucking aren't. > You toss him a wink, which of course he can't see all that well behind your shades. "Hope it's a good one.  You gonna eat any pizza, lil bro?"

"Oh, right." > You finally grab a piece too. "How's the Cock Special?"

> Stuff the rest of your piece into your mouth and brush the crumbs off of your fingers. "It's not big hot Latte, but it's nice and tasty all up in my mouth, so it'll do."

"I mean we can grab a Latte next time-" > Did you just say next time. Did you just imply you want to meet up like this again? Shit. > Stuff your mouth with Pizza real quick.

> Oh. > Oh... That makes yourr heart do the smiley emote. > You grin a liittle bit about that and you say, voice kinda soft, "Yeah... alright.  I'd like that."

"Me too...I think." > If you don't hurt my boyfriend tonight that is, is what you think.

> Don't you worry, Sock.  Not gonna hurt your boyfriend tonight. > You're not gonna be home, so Dave gets to go unhurt for another night.

> Or any other night Bro.(edited) > Or day, or ever:

> Well, at least you'll try to keep your cool when you talk to Dave about it later.

> That's a good start.

> Fuck yeah.  Before you all finish up here, you nod back to the streets now lightly coat with snow. "You going back to your corner, right?  You need a jacket?"

"I mean, I'll live..." > But it's pretty obvious that you don't have any especially warm clothes on you, you know like an idiot.

"Yeah, and you'll get sick, doofus." > You shrug off your jacket--it's a plain black windbreaker, while you wait for your city issue polcie jacket to come in--and you ball it up, handing it over to him. "Here."

> You open your mouth to respond but the Jacket is already in your hands. Oh. That's..Oh. > Is that what it's like to have a caring older brother? "Thanks..." > The Jacket is far too big for you and smells like Bro. It's a weird feeling to put it on. Like a hug you can wear. > Your heart is doing several emotions.

"Hey, no sweat. No good to go out there to work if you're just gonna freeze to death, yeah?" > You have the server bring you all a box for the leftovers, and you give those to him, too. > You stand from the stand and stretch. "Alright, my lunch is about over.  You ready to go?

"Uh, yeah." > You are still trying to sort your feelings over all of this. It's weird. It's nice. > It's what you wanted all along. > Except for the part where you are scared about Dave. > You get up too feeling like a huge fool.

> You, very very carefully, put your hand on his back and lead him out back into the cold. > Look to him, then to your car. "Back to tthe same corner? Or you got anywhere else you need to be?"

> You tense up just a little at the touch but let it happen anyways. "Y-yeah same place." > You just get into the car quickly to cut off the awkward moment. Not without putting on your seatbelt of course.

> Always seatbelt first, kid! > You buckle in and drive him back to the street corner you found him on, putting the car into park but not getting out. "Alright.  Don't get into any trouble, alright?  Oh, and patrol comes past here in about 30 minutes, so be cool when they pass, yeah?"

"Oh uh..Okay. See you, I guess." > You wave an awkward goodbye, overwhelmed by a lot of conflicting emotions.

> You're about to drive off, but then you open the door and, hanging halfway out, you call to him, "Hey! Love you, Sock."

> That just leaves you starring for a moment. Did he just-? Does he? What. Can not compute. "L-Love you too Bro..." > You are not sure if he heard that with the way you mumbled that. You are not sure if you want him to or not. > It's only getting weirder. > But it also warms your birdy little heart.

> You heard it--you've actually got pretty good hearing still, despite all tthatt music and shit. > You smile and wave again before ducking back into your car and driving off.

> The patrol driving by half an hour later doesn't find a drug dealer, just a crying kid in some back alley. > This absolutely kills the bird.