#cuz in the previous ones he had his melanin

[girluimfailing]

WE COULDA HAD THEATRE KID DAMIAN WAYNE BUT YALL HAD TO GO MAKE HIM A FOOTBALLER SMH.........

[thatone-brightstar]

The Bear & The Fox (Carmy Berzatto x Fem!Reader)

Chapter 3: Pin a Fox skin to the wall, call it decoration

Words: 4.9k

Summary: With a few drinks in, you both confess your feelings. But there's always something getting in the way.

a/n: I am the gift that keeps on giving! So here's the next chapter cuz I feel shitty just leaving it in my documents and you all have been so nice! Enjoy! xx

P.S. Reader is Latina in this, so there's gonna be melanin for daysss.

“How much longer do you think you're gonna be?!” Syd yelled at her phone through the noisy bar.

Everyone was on a different wave of conversation, ranging from sports to food to whatever new show they were hooked on. The buzz of chatter around them combined with the pulsing music and lack of food in his system was enough to create a growing migraine in Carmy’s head. He gladly took a swig of the beer in front of him to dumb out the increasing sensation as he waited for Syd to hang up on you. He thought their reaction to joining them would be one of distaste or discomfort but his first drink had been on Sweeps, who was glad to finally see him outside the perimeters of The Beef. 

“I like what you’ve done to the place.” He said after finishing the second beer. “But you gotta lighten up, man. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Also you could use a tan. Try going out in the sun every once in a while!” He joked and a genuine laugh had left Carmy’s lips for the first time in forever.

“She’s on her way!” Sydney yelled to the table and everyone acknowledged it before returning to their conversations.

“Does she know I’m here?” He asked her over the noise, a bit concerned whether he wanted to know the answer or not.

“Yeah! I told her we’re all here!” She answered and of course she would tell you, because as far as they were concerned, nothing out of the ordinary had happened between you two.

His hand began to grow clammy and he took another hefty swig of the amber liquid to try and calm the nerves down. At least the music was loud enough to drown out the sound of his thoughts, he'd have to make due with that for now. The chatter transitioned into anecdotes about the stupidest things they had done as teens and they spent the next ten minutes debating whether Angel stealing single batteries from the family packs at Walmart counted as kleptomania or not. By his third beer, he felt his shoulders lose a bit of the perpetual weight that had been sitting on them since he had arrived back in Chicago; the music felt more bearable, his laughs lighter and his nerves almost down to a hum. 

They had been lucky enough to get a booth table by the windows, the sight of River North’s night life was in full bloom behind the old stained glass and his eyes wandered to the new perspective he had been granted of the old neighborhood. Between neon signs and moving cars he saw you from afar. Standing patiently for the little human to move on the crosswalk light. You looked like a radiant ray of moonlight, with loose curls framing your face like a dark halo and even though he had found you absolutely beautiful with your paint splattered overalls, this was something entirely different, something that would have him losing his balance if he wasn’t already sitting down.

He watched you move your boot-covered feet closer towards the bar, and with each stride on the long skirt, the slit up your thigh revealed a glimpse of lovely tan skin with swirling designs he had known no existence of until then, but now wanted to discover more of. Golden rings contrasted against the black jacket covering your arms as you raked your fingers through your hair and turned towards the window where he had shamelessly been gawking at you. A small smile covered your previous serious features and you waved nervously before disappearing through the entrance.

He shuffled in his seat and wished he would have at least run some water through his hair before leaving, but looking around at everyone’s post work attire, he figured he’d be fine. A cheer of ‘Hey's was heard through the group as you approached the table and you made a little dance once you reached them. You scooted into the booth beside the edge by Carmy and threw a nervous smile in his direction.

“Sorry I’m late! Two fuckin Ubers canceled on my last minute. I swear I was about to start walking!” You yelled exasperated.

“Well you’re already two drinks behind so start catchin’ up!” Marcus said, calling the waiter over and ordering another round of beers and a double  shot of tequila for each one.

“Oh it’s gonna be like that then, huh?!” You asked him with raised brows and a smile.

“Uhh, yeah!” He mimicked you in a pitched valley girl accent and the table roared in laughter.

They went around talking about their day and how Richie, as he does, had death threatened Fak for suggesting he should go to anger management classes. Your shoulder rubbed alongside Carmy’s in the small booth as you laughed at their stories and the friction along with your delicate perfume was making it hard to concentrate on anything at all. He took a couple of fries from the dish at the center of the table to keep his mouth occupied as he listened to Syd and you argue about the best contestant in a new baking show you were both watching. 

The shots came with cheers, and as everyone took the small glass in one hand and a lemon wedge in the other, they went around the table to say something they cheered for,

“I’m thankful that I got tomorrow off so I can get as hammered as I want!” Cheered Sweeps and it was followed by a choir of Boo’s from everyone.

“I guess I'm thankful that I got a job that I actually like.” Marcus continued and the Boo’s turned to Aw’s.

“And I’m very thankful for you, bunch of idiots.” You finished shily and only Marcus, who was sitting across from you, noticed your eyes linger a little too long on Carmy.

Their little glasses clinged against one another and everyone downed the transparent liquid with a scrunched face. 

The conversations broke into groups again, and he took his shot at catching your attention before anyone else. He gently bumped his shoulder against yours while he took a sip of alcohol for courage. From his side view he saw you had turned up to look at him and noticed you swallow hard scanning his features. When he turned to you, a soft smile covered your face and it was hard not to smile back.

“Hey” You whispered, bumping your shoulder back to his softly.

“You..um, you look really nice.” He said leaning towards you so you could hear him better above the music, and also so no one else would  notice his words. 

His breath ghosted over the skin of your ear and you were thankful for the jacket covering your already bumpy skin.  

“Thank you.” You whispered, cheeks warm.

“Look, I’m sor-“ 

“I’m sorry for-“

You interrupted each other, then laughed waiting for the other to continue. 

“You go.” You insisted.

He breathed in deep and turned his torso towards you to give himself a false sense of privacy in the crowded space. “I’m really sorry If I made you feel uncomfortable… back at the office.” He started and his eyes jumped between yours trying to decipher your thoughts through your expressions. “That was not cool and kinda creepy and I don’t want you to go because of me-”

“Wait-”

“You’re a great addition to the team, honestly one of the best, you’re good at calming Richie when he gets stressed and you're fast and precise, and you're good for me too-” He kept rambling, his gaze now focused in his hands.

“Carmy-” You tried to interrupt again with no avail.

“And I’d hate for you to leave cause I’m an impulsive jackass and I wouldn’t know what to do if I.. couldn’t see you.. anymore.” He finished swallowing hard, his eyes dragged slowly from his hands to your features and he grew scared of the confession that had left his mouth under the rambling.

All his words separately meant something different, they meant a thank you, a praise, a gentle pat on the back. But not like this, not all together, jumbled and tied with a string of revelation that there might be something more than what he was saying. He saw your chest raise with the motion of a heavy breath and your eyebrows were scrunched in concentration over his face. The background noise had been covered over by the thumping of blood rushing to his head and for a second his heart stopped at the idea that he had dug himself a deeper grave than he had wished for. He stared back at your eyes unable to look away, the ‘Fuck it’ from a couple hours ago now sour on his tongue.

“Do you wanna talk outside?” You whispered leaning forward so he could hear you, brows still knotted together.

You didn’t wait for his answer as you reached down to his tightly clasped hands and wedged your fingers carefully to get them to separate. You held on tightly then began to slip out the booth telling everyone you were gonna get more drinks for the table, before getting lost in the sea of bodies standing around. He let you guide him through the free spaces between the swaying crowd of drunks as he did his best to calm the growing anxiety in his chest. All he could concentrate on were your delicate fingers brushing softly around his hand.

This is what he wanted, right? This is why he had come knowing you would be here, to tell you how he felt, to clear things up, and since the cat’s head was already out the bag, might as well let the rest of the body out. 

‘Let it rip’ his brother’s words danced in his mind and he smiled humorlessly at how they teased him with how easy it sounded to do so.

**********

Fuuuck. You had not planned this far ahead. At least not this early into the night. You expected to do this with maybe another three drinks in your system, when you could still hold a serious conversation without crying for getting rejected cause the voice in your head would slur that it was his loss and that you were still a bad bitch. It also didn’t help that you had smoked a bit while getting ready and the cloudy haze around your brain had not subsided. You were coherent, yes, which was important, however you were not very good with your self control and with the way your throat had closed up at the sight of his profile while he simply took a drink, god you knew this was gonna be hard. 

His confession still swam in the swampy waters of your foggy brain as you pulled both of you through the crowded space. Your hand was tightly wrapped around what you could hold of his and when you finally spotted an exit, your heart leaped in your chest at the idea of how the conversation would go. The emergency door stood tall between the bathroom entrances, an inaudible creek vibrated through the metal as you pushed yourself against it and a cold breeze of air welcomed your face when you both stepped out into the alley. You expected a few smokers to linger around, but then again many who did choose to smoke did it in front of the place, not the side alley like rats; so you were alone. Great.

You finally let go of his hand, a cold absence replacing it, then leaned against the wall in front of the metal exit, staring at him. He took a cigarette from the packet inside his jacket and lit it, mimicking your actions by the door. He took a couple calming drags while both of you thought about what you were gonna say next. 

You could play this two ways: One. Pretend like you hadn’t understood what he said at the booth and say the whole office thing had been a misunderstanding. A little gaslighting wouldn’t hurt, right? It was for your own good anyway, the both of you. The pessimist in you was sure Carmen didn’t know what he was getting into and he already had enough problems trying to get the restaurant off the ground to add yours to the mix. 

And two, Tell him how you felt, fuck the rule. You had known him long enough to know he wasn’t the type of guy you established the rule for in the first place. He was nothing similar to the mutherfuckers you had met in your other jobs, he was nice and patient and cared more about others than he liked to admit; and for fuck’s sake if the bar was already on the floor, finding someone like that and also have him be hot, was not a common occurrence. 

You took your eyes off your boots scraping the pavement to look at him. ‘Why is he so hot and so miserable?!’ you thought as you watched him with his cigarette, the gloss in your eyes making any source of light into twinkling stars. His eyes met yours and normally you would avert your gaze. Normally, however, you would not be in this situation and normally you would not be feeling this angry all of a sudden. 

“You thought I was gonna leave?” You asked. ‘Solid start’.

“I thought I freaked you out.” He shrugged. “You walked out on me.”

“Yeah, and how did you expect me to react?” You respond a little more defensive than you intended. 

“Look, I know it was fucked and I’m sorry, okay? I just-” He took another drag to calm himself down then looked back at you, ocean eyes harboring a storm. “I don’t know what happens to me… when you're around. You make my chest not hurt as much and I- It feels easier to breathe with you.” 

You stayed silent, staring at him through hooded eyes and heavy breaths, trying to keep your mind clear because how could you concentrate on anything when he spoke so sweetly about you? You had to keep reminding yourself that this was for the best. Around you, the low rumble of the music vibrating past the walls could still be heard, like a distant world existing outside your current bubble of angst.

“Wh-what did you mean?” He asked after a long silence and he noticed the confusion in your blank stare. “When you said you needed to get me out your system, what was that?” 

Carmy noticed the subtle change in your expression, how your shoulders tensed and you diverted your gaze to anything else but him. You wanted to shout that it meant exactly that, he was so deep in your thoughts that some days you had caught yourself shamelessly daydreaming about the two of you together, in any way possible. But the last rational part in your brain held your tongue from speaking, you couldn’t say it, there was too much at risk to do so and he was not helping with the way his words were making your chest swell. You were getting angry because this would be so much easier if he was just another asshole. 

You shrugged looking at him. “Nothing, i-it just came out.” ‘Gaslighting it is.’ 

He exhaled a humorless laugh, his eyes still trained on you. “You’re a shitty liar, you know that?” He said with a last drag of his cig before flicking it to the ground and stomping on it.

He raked a hand through his hair and shameful observation had taught you that this meant Carmy was getting stressed.

“Okay, fine! You wanna know?!” You finally spat with anger, “Because I fuckin’ like you, Carmen!” You raised your arms in exasperation. “Because you have no fuckin’ idea what it does to me when you look at me like-like that!” His gaze was fixated on you, head slightly tilted down and to the right, jaw tensed. His brows dropped lower in a scowl and a jolt of lightning traveled down your back at his expression.

“And why didn’t you say anything!” He yelled back.

“Oh, seriously?! What did you want me to say? I need two roast beef sandwiches, hold the peppers and FYI Carmy, I got a crush on you?!”

“How the fuck was I supposed to know then?!” He said in frustration, taking a step closer to you and the height difference was significantly more noticeable when he wasn’t shrinking into himself.

“You weren’t supposed to, that’s the fuckin’ point!” His shoulders fell slightly and the strength in your voice lowered. “I just... needed to get over you and you’d never know. Get you out my system with someone else and never have to mention it.”

Carmy tried to ignore the flashes of your rosy cheeks and short breaths, panting under someone else. ‘This is not the time.’ he reminded himself.

“So, what? You were just gonna leave me believing I did somethin’ wrong to you when you actually liked me?”

“I wasn’t gonna leave.” You whispered. The words get caught on your tongue and you take a deep breath before continuing.

“But the last time I liked someone at my job it… It didn’t turn out right.” You struggle to calm your racing thoughts, his eyes a distracting lighthouse guiding you back in. His brows knitted together. “I don’t wanna go through that again, Carmy” You said defeated.

“You don’t know if it’s gonna be the same.” His voice pleaded just above a whisper, lower than you were used to when it came to him or his cousin.

“I don’t think I can risk it.” You whispered back, doing your best to keep the tears under control.

You were both silent for a while, until Carmy began to shake his head slowly.

“No, no, no you don’t get to do that, okay? You don’t get to tell me you like me then immediately blow me off cause some asshole in the past hurt you.” He took the last two strides in your direction, his chest now so close you could feel the heat radiating from his body.

You pushed yourself against the wall from the sudden proximity. Your breath seized in your lungs as you felt both his hands cup the sides of your face and tilt it up to stare deep into the pits of your eyes. You swallowed hard at all the scenarios flashing through your head, the turn of events giving you whiplash. He lowered his forehead slowly to yours, your eyelashes fluttered trying to close, but your eyes were fixed on his. Carmy’s face was so close, you could feel the heat off his breath. The smell of tobacco that lingered around you and mixed with the smokey wood scent that seemed to cling to him after a long workday, had your head grasping onto the last threads of self control left in  you.

“Tell me to stop. Tell me to stop and I’ll do it, I’ll never touch you again or mention it, I promise.” He rambled, a soft desperation clear in his voice. “I won’t even look in your direction but please, please don’t ever think for a second that I would do anything to hurt you.” He whispered.

Even in the darkness of the alley, you could tell his irises had swallowed the last drop of blue, now so dark and glossy you could see your own despair reflected back to you. You swallowed hard to get rid of the cottonmouth and his eyes flickered towards your lips for less than a second. ‘God, why couldn’t you just say yes?!’ Your head screamed at you through the dissipating smog of weed and untampered emotions.

He had not only given you his heart on a golden platter, but had plated it himself and set the table for you, too. Now it was solely your decision if you wanted to take it or not, if you wanted to guard his heart next to yours for safekeeping or let it finish crumbling on the grime covered pavement. You stared at his features in contemplation and scanned your brain for all the ways it told you this could go wrong. And yet, even after a thousand scenarios came up, you held in protective arms the few ones that bloomed a warm excitement in your chest. You wanted to, even if it was just this once, to be fearless, jump into the unknown regardless of the outcome. You truly did.

“It’s not that easy.” You whispered, shutting your eyes to avoid the look of hurt haunting over his. His hands faltered their grip on your face and soon a cold rush of air replaced the warm contact.

You reopened your gaze to see him standing with his hands now resting on the brick beside your head, defeated. His stare was glued to his tattooed skin, not even daring to look directly at you anymore and you knew, he was withdrawing back to the depths of his mind where one goes when you’ve been completely shattered. You could see his jaw tense up, probably in anger and he was well in his right to be so. He had bared his feelings to you and you had massacred them all over the walls in less than five words. ‘It’s better like this.’ You tried to convince yourself.

“I’m so sorry Carmy, but I-I can’t-”

He cleared his throat then pushed himself back with enough force that it almost felt like he had pulled on an invisible string against your chest.

“No- uh, no I get it.” he sniffled “You’re right, it’s better this way.” He did his best to avoid your gaze, settling it on anything around the empty alley. “I’m gonna go buy the drinks and then head home.”  He said walking back to the door.

You watched still from your position by the wall how he reached for the handle pulling the metal open. An immediate rumble of bass surrounded the once empty area as Carmy walked halfway in then stopped. He slightly turned his head in your direction, eyeing you over his shoulder.

“Don’t-uh.. don’t worry about.. this.” He said to you over the music. “I meant what I said about not sayin’ anythin’.” He rose his head to the sky for a couple seconds then back down. “So, don’t worry about it.” The gravel under his feet groaned as he turned to look at you one last time, “See you at work, chef.”

He was gone with a slam of the door. You stayed motionless, fixated on the space his body had occupied only seconds before. The ghost of his touch still tingled on your face and it took you an unspeakable amount of strength to not break down for the second time that day. It was already atrocious enough that you had committed what was probably the second worst mistake of your life by letting him go, but if you let yourself fall apart in a dingy unlit back alley of some bar, you have truly found a point lower than you thought possible. So with a very, very shaky breath and with the vast expertise as a teen with an overprotective mother, you pulled yourself together, sniffled back the tears and made your way inside ready to pretend like the last fifteen minutes had never happened.

When you reached the booth with your friends, a tray of five shots sat untouched on the table and a sour taste invaded your mouth to see the sixth had been downed and turned upside down at the end of the tray. 

“Carmy said your mom called, is everything okay?” Sydney asked as soon as you were in earshot, the pit in your stomach grew again  because even after hurting him, he still considerate enough to cover for your absence.

“Uh… yeah she’s fine. Just wanted to know when I’d be back.” You lied as you slid back into the booth.

With no hesitation, you reached for one of the glasses and downed it straight, no lemon. Syd gave a confused look to your expressionless face and even reached for one of the glasses to prove it was actually alcohol when you were laughing at Angel and Macus’ arm wrestling.

The liquid burned a distracting path down your throat and kept your attention diverted enough from the emotions you knew you’d have to figure out when the fog had lifted. For now, at least you would allow yourself to play with the idea that everything was fine and that your chest wasn’t shattering with every whiff of his lingering scent that permeated on your jacket.

The rest of the night was a blur of strawberry daiquiris, tequila shots, terrible karaoke and the guys competing over who could throw the furthest a traffic cone they found off the side of the road while walking you and Syd home, at almost four in the morning. They had dropped you off with a chorus of slurred ‘bye byess’ and kept walking in the direction of “Adventure” as Sweeps had called it. On your way up, the usual still stairs had become a workout to climb and Syd had almost landed on her ass on the second and third floor, before tripping on the forth and sliding belly first down half the flight of stairs. You did your best to contain the laughter after seeing her reaction to finally landing with nothing but a bruised chin and ego, but her surprised face was enough to have you slumping on the last step and heaving with tears in your eyes. After you both caught your breath, you reached towards her and held her hand until you were in the safety of your room.

You giggled drunk while changing into your pajamas and turned to Sydney, telling her about your foolproof plan of going home with a stranger to get Carmy out of your head.

“I don’t get it.. why not jus’ like, bang Carmy, right? And get it over with?” She said between hiccups as you both climbed into your bed.

“It’s jus’ not the same!” You whined, turning off the light. “He’s too good for that.” You heard Syd groan beside you and you’re glad the lights were off so she couldn’t see you rolling your eyes at her. “He is!”

You shimmied under the covers and stared at the glow in the dark stickers on your ceiling, the alcohol making them swim around the blank canvas like shooting stars.

“He’s sweet and kind and… funny in like a fucked up, kinda tragic way..” you giggle “and he’s so fuckin’ hot, Sydney! So hot! Every time he looks at me with those eyes I want him to bend me over the expo an-“ you feel a soft smack against your face and the plushness of the pillow drowns out your laughs. 

Syd groaned in disgust at the image you planted in her head “Dude gross! Why would I ever need to know that?!” She said taking the pillow back from you. 

You giggled again and turned to Syd’s silhouette, softly combing back the braids that rested on her shoulder to distract yourself. “I think I really fucked up tonight, Syddy.” You finally admitted in the darkness of your safe space and heavily intoxicated. 

Sydney hummed in question and you knew you only had a few moments of clarity before falling unconscious. You took the end of one of her braids and used it to tickle under her nose to keep her awake a little longer while you failed to understand the many emotions in your head.

“I think he hates me now.” You said softly, a small tear sliding out your eye and quickly disappearing into the soft fabric of your pillow.

She scratched at her nose in frustration then slightly slapped her palm against your forehead. You laughed softly but continued to bug her.

“He could never hate you, he loves you too much.” She mumbled carelessly, readjusting herself and swinging a leg up on your hip under the duvet.

Your cheeks felt warm at the idea of love and even though you knew it was too soon to call it that, you couldn’t avoid the fuzzy feeling the word brought to your insides. ‘Oh to be loved’ you thought ‘and by Carmy of all people’. 

“You can’t know that.” You said with a sniffle, caressing the tip of her braid now on your own nose. You liked how it tickled.

Syd sighed before lifting her head as best she could in her drunk and half asleep state and slurred your name “Please, that man has been tripping-over-his-feet in love with you since day one.” She paused to pull her hair from your hands and adjust the pillow under her. “You two are the only idiots who haven’t noticed.” Then laid her head back down with a soft smack.

A new sensation filled your chest, one you hadn’t really given a name to before because there hadn’t been a reason to. It was a warmth that spread from the crown of your head down to the tips of all your extremities as your friend’s words floated in your head. A slow smile extended across your face and with the last waves of consciousness you decided to put an end to all the doubt and talk to him tomorrow, the stupid rule be damned. 

Capter 4.

Taglist: @pearlstiare and that’s it lmao

[ca-suffit]

I haven’t read the books,nor plan to do so, but after reading your post on Nickistat I saw a thread in twitter complaining about how the show gave Nicki’s quotes to Louis from the book and how they are doing Nickistat all about Louis, Idk there are people out there who think Nicki was Lestat true love or whatever, they say Sam also hyped up Nicki importance in Autumn podcast, imo he hyped up Loustat too much even.

I get people get mad at ship wars or at shipping in general but in this case the show has stablished Louis and Lestat too much to ignore it, like they have made them the couple of the show imo.

Also noticed people only want to ship m/m ship with less than 1% of melanin, like if Loustat were two yt dudes it would be n1 pairing on ao3 but here we are, like Hannibal or Sherlock, interesting and racist.

I had to remember what Nicki quote Louis had, but it's "only the impossible can do the impossible." They need to calm down lol. I always saw that as a sneaky thing Lestat did to kind of "call" to Louis and manage his own grief about Nicki at the same time. He'd already honed in on Miss Lily to get to him to begin with, why not repeat his previous lover's words on top of it? Cuz I always saw it as a repeat, not "giving" his lines to Louis as if they're brand new. They switch up lines from the book canon all the time otherwise too, it's not like this was the single moment.

Nickistat was not that popular until now. It's always had a section of the fandom since before the show, and been beloved to a degree, but ppl are riding hard for it now just bcuz it's the one ship we're gonna see so far with white men only. Ppl are gonna deny that but it's the truth. It's about to be an annoying fucking mess here. "Interesting and racist" indeed.

[angelanika]

How Bizarre

[ProHero! Bakugou x Black! Fem Reader]

Part 1.                                 Part 2>>>>

Chapter Warnings: cursing, sexual themes, mentions of alcohol

[Please see the series masterlist for overall warnings before getting too invested 💀 characters are aged up!]

“hey....hey Ground Zero....are you awake?”

The faint whisper of someone calling out his name was enough to stir the Pro Hero out of his slumber.

He let out a deep, frustrated groan as he lazily opened up his crimson eyes, only to be met with an unfamiliar face peering over him.

“WHAT THE FUCK?!” Bakugou speedily shot up from the hotel bed, startling you just as much. You quickly backed away from him, slamming into the adjacent wooden dresser, as his hands began to spark.

“WAIT!! Waitwaitwaitwait,” you cried with your hands up and eyes tightly shut, “I- I just wanted to know if you had any clothes I could borrow!!”

The popping of Bakugou’s blazing hands began to simmer down as he took in his surroundings. The fighting stance he had equipped was slowly disabled and he slouched back down into the hotel bed, pressing his fingers against the bridge of his nose irritatedly. 

His head began to pound as the blurred memories of the previous night came crashing in. 

From the multiple drinks he ordered for himself at the bar, to the Raspberry Lemon Drop Martini he had the bartender send your way. From the way your hips swayed as you drew nearer to thank him, to the way your firm ass grinded against his clothed dick as you lost yourself on the dance floor. 

His past couple of weeks had been overwhelmingly busy and last night, he knew he had to get laid if wanted to be able to get through the next.

He eyeballed your curves from across the bar for quite some time before he finally sent the drink over. He always had to be extremely cautious when dealing with these sort of things due to his status and popularity, he couldn't run into it too quickly no matter how sexually frustrated he was and how intoxicating you looked. He had to feel you out from afar a bit first.

However, when you approached in that dress that had your melanin shining and his dick straining, your tits slightly bouncing and your manicured hands dragging down his sleeves as you border-line moaned out “Thanks for the drink Ground Zero ;)”, he knew he made the right decision. 

And sweetcheeks, that was the first of many more moans to come. 

Bakugou practically dragged you into his car and to the nearest hotel as soon as you gave him the green light, easily securing a more-than-comfortable last minute hotel room for the two of you....hero perks.

As soon as you both were through the door, he pounced. He was rough and wild, going at you round after round after round....not that you were complaining though.

You could tell that he must’ve been frustrated about something or the other, but then again, that was none of your concern. You had your own problems to worry about and as sexy of a fantasy it would be to date a ProHero, you were there to hit it and quit it just like he was. 

What do you think this is? Some sort of fanfiction??

But now the night of fun is over and here we are...

When Bakugou had finally gathered all his thoughts and his headache began to dull, he trained his eyes back on you. The hot brown-skinned babe whose back he had repeatedly blown out just hours before, now stood nervously in front of him wrapped in a hotel robe. 

Your hair and make-up were a complete wreck as you stood there, reminding him of how he had your body shaking and thrown into all sorts of positio- WAIT WHY ARE YOU STANDING THERE?

“Oi! Dumbass!” 

You sharply turned to him, not appreciating the nickname, but giving him your attention nonetheless.

“Tf are you still doing here and waking me up for?? Is this your first one-night-stand or something?” he said mockingly, bringing his arms above his head and resting back on them. His biceps flexed and he didn’t miss the way your eyes drank them in, causing his smirk to widen even more. 

Cocky bastard...

You straightened your posture with your hands now firmly sitting on your hips, not granting him the privilege of thinking you’re intimidated by him whatsoever. “No,” you rolled your eyes, “In fact, I was actually on my way out when I realized that I can’t leave.”

He shot you a quizzical look, “Door’s unlocked. See yourself out.”

“That’s not what I mean.”

You huffed as you strode over to the other end of the room, descending to gather something off the floor, before making your way elsewhere to pick up another item. Bakugou shamelessly eyed your round ass as you bent over. Your skin seemed to be glowing even more now and he silently wished that the cream-colored bath robe would ride up jussst a little bit higher. 

Suddenly, you turned back to him holding up the items in question. 

“I can’t leave because someoneee got a little too excited last night and tore my clothes to shreds,” you threw the garments at the culprit. “They’re completely unwearable now so that’s why I wanted to know if you had anything I could borrow.” 

Bakugou inspected the pieces fabric that had him thoroughly whipped for you the previous night and noted the frays, stretches and burnt holes in them before uncaringly tossing them to the side and making himself more comfortable in the bed, “I just booked this fucking hotel! Of course I don’t have anything for you to wear!”

As he began snuggling back into the sheets, ready to doze off, you bravely dragged them off, exposing his bare chest to the sharp, cool air once again. 

“TF DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?!”

“Could you please at least give me a ride?” you begged, eyes glossy with desperation, “I need to be at work in less than an hour and I don’t feel like riding the bus bare-pussied.” 

“Tch. Who TF goes clubbing the night before they have work?!” he barked.

“None of your business.”

He rolled his eyes and groaned, yanking the sheets back up and turning over in the bed, “Call a fucking Uber.” 

“Too expensive.”

“Damn, you’re fucking annoying!”

Grumpily, he sat up in the bed and looked at the bedside clock. 

6:14am?? No fucking way he’s getting up now to drive some extra home on his day off. 

In a flash, he pointed towards the small, velvety chair in the corner, with his pants messily thrown across it. “My fucking wallet is in the pocket. Just grab a $50 and go!” 

(please forgive me but i’m basing this off of US Dollars cuz i’m not too familiar with the Yen conversion and value SORRY!!)

You were definitely taken aback by his instructions, but made no more complaints. Dropping a quiet “thanks”, to which you received no reply, you waddled over to the money pouch. 

Upon opening it, your eyes lit up. There you saw the $50...and another one....and another one...and ano- you knew the man was loaded, but the man was LOADED!!

“How does this all even fit in here??” you whispered to yourself as you inspected the polished, leather casing.

You slowly peaked behind your shoulder towards the bed. There, was one of the top Pro Heros dozing off in the bed and here, was his jam-packed wallet in your shaky hands.

You mentally cursed yourself as your fingers clasped around 2 hundred dollar bills as well as the fifty. You knew your ancestors were looking down and spiritually spitting on you right now, but the temptation got the better of you. 

I probably need it more than him...right? He won't even notice...

With that, you quickly pocketed the cash and booked your uber.

A few minutes later, you’re making your way out of the building and to the car waiting for you with the extra money in hand. You tried your best ignore the bewildered stares from the guests and workers in the lobby as you paraded in the hotel’s robe, but DAMN did they make you feel noticed!

You lowered your head in attempts to hide your embarassed (and guilty) face as you ran into the street and tumbled into the car. 

The driver looked at you just as strangely as the hotel staff but you still felt a little more at ease.

“Goodmorning,” you chirped. “Headed to 34 Anika Street right?”

To be continued...

[soulcrowvi]

40 questions because why not.

1.do you prefer to shower when you wake up or before you go to sleep?. Can I have both? I like to shower in the morning because I can clean off any  sweat I may have produced when I slept and it also helps me start my day. Before bed helps me unwind and clean off the germs of the day… but I may sweat in the middle of the night… hmmmmm I guess morning showers LOL 

2. does it bother you to sleep with the lights on. Yes, I really cant sleep with any type of light in the room. I always find myself waking up if I see light.

3. cigarettes, marijuana, or neither? Neither fam.  

4. beer, liquor, or neither? Liquor, I hate the taste of beer 5. what is the biggest impact you hope to make throughout your lifetime?  Probably being able to help someone with their journey get through the darkness of mental diseases. This is a part of the reason why i want to go into the field of psychiatry.  

6. what’s your favourite movie genres.  Uhhh, romantic comedies, animation, horror, fantasy, and anime (if that’s a thing) 7. puns or dirty jokes? Dirty jokes boiiiii. My pun game needs work 8. bubble bath, bath bomb, or bath salts. Probably bubble bath. I haven’t tried the other two. 9. you wake up to find you’ve traded places with a celebrity – who is it? Hmmm I don’t pay too much attention to many celebrities lives so I cant really answer 10. you wake up to find you’ve traded places with a fictional character – who is it? Probably Monkey D. Luffy from one piece. Hes always carefree, does what he wants, eats all day, goes on these dope adventures with his crew and will beat someone’s ass if they step to him wrong. I wouldn’t mind living a life like that for a day or two. Although Zoro is my favorite character I prefer luffys lifestyle a little more.

11. what are you wearing? A grey shirt and blue joggers? WHY YOU NEED TO KNOW HUH? 12. what is your earliest memory?. Crawling on my mom’s bed and she picking me up with a big smile while making  some kind of going up sound. I know I was a baby because even to this day she does that when she plays with other small children.   13. moon or stars? Stars because I like to lay down and count them. Also having sex under the stars is on my bucket list LOLOL 14. sunrise or sunset?. Sunrise.  I love the crisp air and quiet atmosphere of everything being asleep.  During times like that it feels the world is at a stand-still and I can take a second and breathe maybe even go for a jog. Oh and you cant forget the colors of the sky: they so purrrrdy . 15. what’s the best present you’ve ever received? The gift of life boiiiiii. Nah but for a material gift, I hate to say this but, probably a hand written piece of poetry my ex gave me. It a cheesy love poem that made my heart flutter at time. no one has ever done something that for me before so it was something special.  I haven’t looked at it in years and don’t plan on doing it any time soon. That bridge was burned  many years ago cuz fuck my ex lmaooo 

16. what’s your favourite scent? Vanilla or lavender. I use to use candles with those scents as a way to calm myself during a time of depression. In a sense, I associate them both with calmness 17. what do you think about when you need to be in a calm state of mind?  Thinking of myself as a flowing river. This concept came to me after witnessing a small stream on street carry away a twig during the rain. The way I saw it was that twig representing a problem of any sort and the water being my conscious. Basically my conscious developed the habit of analyzing the given problem and determines if it needs to be addressed now, later, or not even be addressed at all. It’s a way I practice mindfulness lol 18. what do you think about when you need motivation? “I know I can fucking do this, so let me stop being a bum and do it” sounds a little harsh but that’s how I get myself moving lmaoo

19. list 5 things you like most about yourself.

My personality

The melanin in ma skin

Dance abilities

Being able to push through most of my anxiety and depression

Kinky af 20. do you have many friends or do you prefer to keep a close circle? I have a small circle of true friends mostly because I dread small talk with new people because ive never been too interested in it with strangers and you know small talk is the best way to start friendships soooooo. I can say this though I have a large number of acquaintances and I probably wouldn’t mind building deeper friendships with them. 21. if you had the chance to be immortal exactly as you are now, would you take that opportunity? Although it’s a tempting offer, im going to say nah to immortality.  Sure, it would be nice to witness how the rest of history will unfold and being able to live forever but it comes at a high cost. The cost being that youll out live everything and everyone you love and cherish. Plus there will come a time when everything ends and you’ll be the only one left, wandering endlessly in the hallowed shell of what you once called home…. That got dark LOL #PessimismOnFleek

22. what do you think of when you wake up? I think of three things in this order:

“….need food”

“I wonder how kn is doing”

“what the fuck do I need to do today?”

23. what’s your favourite word? Breathe. This word helps me calm and recollect myself in time of anxiety and also allows me to take a second and appreciate life.   24. if you could change your name, what would you change it to? I would keep my name the same, I love it actually lmaooo

25. what would your name be if you were the opposite/another gender?  I asked my mom about this before and apparently I would have been a Diana lmaooo 26. turn ons? I have turn ons for both physical and personality

Physical: freckles or small moles on the face. Glasses (bring yo blind ass here girlll) a nice warm smile, long hair although I don’t mind short hair. Ticklish. Has a nice style

Personality: Really kindhearted, loves animals, willing to sit down and talk about finding a solution to our problem if we fight, motivated by a dream,  passionate about her craft or hobby, doesn’t mind carrying the convo at times, is comfortable with silence at times. Knowledgeable about things she finds interesting, does little things for me like buying me my favorite snack as a surprise for when she sees me.  Is comfortable with my level of kinkiness and sexual expression through words. Keeps up with and feeds off my dark, sexual, awkward humor. Not afraid to speak her mind.

27. turn offs? A girl that tries to have “the best of both worlds” basically flirting with multiple dudes at once. Has a history of cheating.  Completely selfish(only concerned with what I can offer her and no “what can I do for them”). The “im fine” text when we both KNOW something is wrong. Goes ghost out of nowhere. Liars. thinks relationships are temporary  and not looking for something long term (I hate wasting time). Treating other people like shit, fake (talks shit about someone then next thing you know they’re the best of  friends) entertains other dudes KNOWING damn well they have a thing for her.  Says “My feelings changed” (three words I despise)

28. kinks? Bondage, neck bites, ear nibbles, lip biting while kissing, biting any part of my body really lmao.(those three areas will rev me up real quick ) letting me pull her hair, licking/ kissing random spots on her body. heaving breathing….lots of it pls. dark colored knee socks/thigh highs if she wears those.. LAWDDDDD *nose bleed*(this could be a slight fetish).  Lap dances and strip teases (both combined as well)   29. what’s your “type”? Uhhh, never really had to think about it until now but glasses, long hair, older, the “social butterfly that’s lowkey and introvert” woke, wants to help me grow, supportive, caring will call me out on my shit, intelligent, high ass gpa (why is that relevant? Idk )

30. give a piece of advice. Everything happens for a reason. Whether you believe in a higher power or not, certain things occur in your life as a way to prepare you for the future, teach you something about yourself, or aid in your growth. You just have to stop and look at the positive in the situation. 31. do you fear death? Nah, but I do want to live my live to the fullest and live to be at least 96.   32. do you believe there is anything that exists after death? Ive juggled the idea around in my head and, similar to the person I snagged this questionnaire from, I definitely  love the idea of reuniting with lost loved ones in some kind of after live. I also like to believe reincarnation is a thing only because it would be dope to die and come back as a giant octopus lmaoooo, but seriously the idea of coming back to life as a different creature is fascinating 33. what expectations do you set for yourself? do you live up to them? Honesty, trying my best at whatever I do, always stay true to myself,  not being pressured ny others. I think I live up to these pretty well but recently ive decided to stop being passive of things that bother me so I guess im still working on that 34. are you a good friend? would you want to be friends with the type of friend that you are? I think im a pretty good friend. Im always down to listen and support my friends with whatever their endeavors may be. Im very chill, understanding, and mature so you don’t have to worry about me  creating drama of any sort. Yeah I would befriend myself if possible 35. dinosaurs or space? Dinosaurs because I’ve always found archaeology to be interesting and I actually love learning about history. I loved T-rexes ever since the first Jurassic park  film I saw. 36. do you believe in aliens?  If we as a species could evolve from particles who’s to say creatures on a distant planet couldn’t do the same? So I guess you could say I don’t deny the existence of them. 37. do you believe in ghosts? Not really but you’ll never catch me messing with an oujia board or casually exploring a proclaimed haunted house. Aint nobody got time for that (similar to the previous question I don’t deny their existence) 38. describe your style? Uses a LOT of dark colors. Its very simple and classy but nothing over the top. I love to wear beaded bracelets because I like fidgeting with them when im bored or anxious. Oh I like flannels as well. Idk if that paints a decent picture lmao 39. send me your name, I’ll post what I think your aesthetic would be. Bish whet? 40. post a photo of yourself? Look at my tumblr default lmao

[theboujeeratchademic]

I’ve recently been pondering whether or not my blog should remain “anonymous” although, technically, given the available social media links it isn’t really. I see my lovely fellow bloggers always with the cute pictures and icons, I figure well what else is going to be the face of my blog but me?

Why did I choose anonymous?

Initially, I just wasn’t sure about how I felt being my uncensored self to the public. I didn’t want to plaster my face next to some of the controversial topics that were first discussed on the blog. Too many life moves were pending and as I’ve been warned, blackademic circles are small, and potentially vindictive (but that’s another story for another time). I’d also I convinced myself it would be cool to be the mysterious face behind the semi vulgar posts I’d been planning to unleash on the people.

So who is she?

I’m 23. Aspiring PhD. Still can’t pinpoint what I wanna do with my life even though I probably shouldn’t admit that out loud. And this is my face:

I’m originally from Brooklyn. Born and bred. I’m also Jamaican. Born here. But Jamaican as far as you’re concerned. Both of my parents are products of the mean streets and country… (can we call them roads?) that are the island of Jamaica. And I mean, they’re type of Jamaican that has stories about times they rolled down the side of a mountain. Like, grew up in the same town as Yellow man Jamaican. As a result, I’m the kind of Jamaican that has a breakfast looking like this:

I believe I stated somewhere in another post that I started undergrad at 16. I really only make this point because it’s shaped my adolescent years in ways that no other experience could. Instead of a sweet 16, I had going away shindigs cuz nobody could afford to do both. My bf makes it a point to call me “baby genius”.. please, don’t do this. If I was so much of a genius I would have passed Calc that first semester.

SMARTIES are my absolute favorite candy ever

I’m doing the adult braces thing. I’ve only chewed gum once in the last 2 years. Orthodontist tells me she wants it off in the Fall. I’m like… uh yea honey, let’s get this rolling. You may wonder why I put this in an about me post, but until you’ve had braces you don’t realize how much it kinda becomes a part of your identity. It was hard at first, waking up one day and sounding like Mighty B out of the blue. Then my teeth got twisted damn near out of my mouth and I was so self-conscious I didn’t know what to do with myself. But I actually think I’ll miss these things. When they snap these hoes off, I’ll cue “I’ll be missing you….”

How does she actually feel about God?

This is for those who read my previous post about church. And if you haven’t, what are you waiting for? Get up to speed here. I’m Christian. I’m going through a process of trying to reconcile what my heart tells me Jesus wants, what the Bible says he wants, and what the stereotypical man in the pulpit wants. I know Jesus didn’t get snatched up out of his comfy throne in heaven so that a man in the pulpit who binge drinks to make it into the pulpit could tell me that I need to be submissive to a man that may swing at me every now and again. But please don’t mistake my critiques of the church/black church as a rejection of religion/God/Jesus. There’s this thing that one cannot be black, woke, and Christian. But in the past year when no science or mindfulness techniques worked, I found value in staying alive connected only to my belief in Jesus. That’s sacred to me. So yes, this influences my life. Allow me. 

Patrice: INFP

The book Quiet by Susan McCain solidified my life. I’m super introverted. But I am capable of being the opposite. While pretending to be an extrovert, my face burns and I rush through the moment. I hate being put on the spot and once I figure out that I’m the center of attention, my insides go into self-preservation mode and sets itself on fire. My ability to multitask kicks in and I coach myself through the experience.  Blogging thus far has worked out well to compliment introvert life. Interestingly to some, I’m just as candid an open in face to face conversation as I am on my blog. Perhaps it’s fitting to add here that I am a Sagittarius. Deduce from that what you will.

I procrastinate. My time management skills are poo. I love to start projects that don’t finish themselves.  I have it all together and I’m a mess. I’m a perfectionist. For this reason, I’m going to feel like nothing I present is A1 per my standards, but I’m learning to just DO. Otherwise this blog would still be a figment of my imagination.

All hail melanin!

Black women inspire me. The perseverance, the resilience, the innate ability to get the ball rolling when everyone else around is just talking about the ball. The melanin. The natural hair, the relaxed hair, 30 inch weaves and pixie cuts. The badassery, the nurturing, the relationships we form with one another and how we fortify each other. It’s everything. I love that somehow, we still manage to stand in a world that doesn’t give us a damn thing to stand with. I hate that we must be these things, but because we do I admire us so much more than anything or anyone else, because it takes so. Freaking. Much.

And I love our young black girls. Because no one can get them like we should get them, and therefore I’ve devoted my life’s work to young black women. Because at multiple points in my journey an OG black woman reached back for me and gave me the game so I could be an OG black woman one day too.

    Who’s the BoujeeRatchademic? I’ve recently been pondering whether or not my blog should remain “anonymous” although, technically, given the available social media links it isn’t really.