#cut to a montage of me failing to get a piece of heart at the end of a hyrule field spinner track for ten minutes
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monsters better watch out for me and my spinner
i might... injure myself at them
#audrey plays twilight princess#its a miracle the stallord fight went so well (and was fun) bc i am kind of a nightmare at the spinner#i dont remember super clearly but i think i really struggled w/ that boss as a kid? but then i did pretty well this time.#cut to a montage of me failing to get a piece of heart at the end of a hyrule field spinner track for ten minutes#i did eventually get it at least.
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Disrupt Project - Recap & Conclusion
My convoluted journey through the disrupt project, aka my foolproof three step plan to instant and absolute success.
Step 01: Barely read the brief, show up to your first workshop purely out of obligation.
Above: *thinking emoji*
Honestly I had no real idea what I was doing at the beginning of this project. It was already tough adjusting to life in the art college and suddenly we're given eight weeks to finish a project that will decide whether we get our desired discipline for the next four years of school. No pressure...
Even though I read the brief I somehow still fundamentally misunderstood the idea of project. I was sure for some reason that the project was supposed to be one major piece of work, not a collection presented on the Tumblr. I'm currently still looking for someone to pin blame on for this, but suffice to say it obviously wasn't my fault. Obviously. Definitely.
I spent the first week basically just idling on a project for the first workshop that wasn't what I really wanted to be making. It was the bird/window diorama you can find if you scroll down for about two hours. The theme behind that and my initial idea for the brief was "Exploring Disrupt through Social Progress". I guess "disrupt" makes me think of radical movements and the struggle involved in disrupting the establishment.
As much as those movements are near to my heart though, it just wasn't clicking. I felt completely lost and problems in my own life had drained all my motivation for school. I had basically given up after two and a half weeks, which brings us to...
Step 02: Get COVID and miss about four weeks of schoolâŚ
Above: How I spent my midterm break :(
My next big-brain move was to get COVID in the midst of my crisis of fate. I already felt like crap and getting sick obviously didn't help. I missed about three or four weeks with this, depending on whether the midterm counts. Halfway through I had my midterm assessment with Sylvia Shortall and Mike Fox.
After not doing much in my first couple of workshops; an uninspired diorama and a bit of laser cutting was all I had to show at this point. I started working on some animation, again thinking I needed to create a big singular work cause I'm illiterate. I had an idea to represent the whole "social progress" theme through an animation of a running jump turning into flight, with a montage of similarly inspired work obscuring the background. I liked this concept but the scale of it was giving me intense anxiety. I gathered what I had and, put on a mask, and headed to the meeting regardless.
Long story short, Mike and Sylvia basically went "bro what are you even doing?", a question I really couldn't answer.
With an ever growing sense of frustration, I went home and refocused my project. The new theme was self destruction, something which I knew all too well at this point. I thought if I'm gonna fail this whole project, I'm gonna make it absolutely clear the reasons for my failure. With this newfound determination, I moved on to...
Step 03: Exploring Disrupt through Self Destruction
Above: Unbothered, moisturized, in my lane, happy, focused
With a little push from Sylvia, getting me started in the 3D Materials workshop, I was finally able to get the ball rolling and started to make work I was happy with. Before long I was making self-portraits in any and every medium I could and finding new and interesting ways to destroy those portraits.
I'm a mature student, my life has been disrupted so many times I can't tell the ever ascending escalator from the never ending fall anymore. Whether it was trauma or impertinence, whether I was right or I was wrong, the cart went off the rails either way.
My short semester at LSAD encapsulates my whole life basically, I couldn't negotiate life's hard left turns and was left in a tailspin. My simple path to completing the disrupt brief by following weekly workshops and set goals was ruined, largely by my own hand. I am the chief disruptor of my life, for better or worse.
What I want to express through this project isn't just the disruptive nature of self destruction, but the effect of self destruction; The gradual erosion of ones life, the inability to heal and the eventual loss of self.
I feel if nothing else, I was able to better understand myself through working on this project. I hope that same understanding shines through to whoever is reading this now.
Above & Below: Self Destruction
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"It's been more like a 'Choose Your Own Adventure'!" A Rufly Playlist
Finally, a use for my Dad(â˘) music taste! I threw in a few live recordings/rough sessions because thatâs rock and roll, babey. YouTube link here
image sources: (x) (x) (x)
American Girl - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
If you think this isnât a rufly song, then idk what to tell you.
And for one desperate moment there / He crept back in her memory / God, it's so painful when something that is so close / Is still so far out of reach
Light My Fire - The Doors
Making this playlist was fun because I got to imagine a lot of precanon Rufus/Lily, and how they came to be. And like, I can see Rufus covering a LOT of these, yk?
The time to hesitate is through / No time to wallow in the mire
Funny Feelinâ - Langhorne Slim
I can also see Rufus actually writing some of these. Like this one!
Well, I got my eye on you, baby / And I know I ain't the only one / But if you just say maybe / My lonely days would be done
Superstar - tswift
If you donât project onto at least one tswift song can you even call it a ship playlist?
And I knew from the first note played / I'd be breaking all my rules to see you / You smile that beautiful smile and all the girls in the front row / Scream your name
Lay, Lady, Lay - Bob Dylan
Tour life vibes
His clothes are dirty but his, his hands are clean / And youâre the best thing that heâs ever seen
Fire - Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band
Your kisses they burn / But your heart stays cool
Fooled Around and Fell in Love - as performed by Morgan James
Because Lily Rhodes really did fuck around and find out.
Free, on my own is the way I used to be / Ah, but since I met you baby, love's got a hold on me
Donât Let Me Down - The Beatles
Nothing says Lily & Rufus like a Beatles deep cut.
I'm in love for the first time / Don't you know it's gonna last
Shadows of the Night - Pat Benatar
80s rock vibes, babe!
You can cry tough baby, it's all right / You can let me down easy, but not tonight
She - as performed by She & Him
She may be the love that cannot hope to last / May come to me from shadows of the past
Canât Buy Me Love - The Beatles
Tell me that you want the kind of things / That money just can't buy / I don't care too much for money / Money can't buy me love
Second Hand News - Fleetwood Mac
Itâs breakup chapter time, yâall
I know there's nothing to say / Someone has taken my place
Hungry Heart - Bruce Springsteen
I met her in a Kingstown bar / We fell in love I knew it had to end / We took what we had and we ripped it apart / Now here I am down in Kingstown again
Piece of My Heart - as performed by Big Brother and the Holding Company
Have another little piece of my heart now, baby / Well, you know you got it, child, if it makes you feel good
Love Really Hurts Without You - Billy Ocean
In my head, this is the âLily and her cavalcade of failed relationships post-Rufusâ montage song
You walk like a dream and you make like you're queen of the action
Halls - Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness
This is the âRufus touring post-Lilyâ montage song
Thought a broken heart could write a perfect song / And it did and I was right so now you're gone
Mulholland Drive - The Gaslight Anthem
Okay so we all know about the Dair & Rufly parallels, and this song nearly ended up on that playlist, but the vibe didnât quite fit. And I think, in my heart of hearts, that this song (though probs more punk than Lincoln Hawk sounds) reads like Rufus could have written it. And there are lines that are so evocative of both Dair & Rufly like I still remember holding you, just out of sight of her - like! Thatâs Valentineâs day 2012 amirite??? And: But it scared you, love, to need someone, so you killed it all instead. And the imagery of Mulholland Drive with Lily being from LA...Anyways this song is one of my all time favorites.
Would you miss me if I was gone and all the simple things were lost? / Would you ever wait on me to say / Oh that Iâd just die if you ever took your love away
Malibu 1922 - COIN
You're some old man's new trophy / Locked up in some house in New Jersey / Now money's not a problem / But 20 years it seems you've forgotten
Howâs the World Treating You - Elvis Presley
Pilot Rufly vibes, but sad!
Every sweet thing that mattered / Has been broken in two / And I'm asking you, darling / How's the world treating you?
Even Cowgirls Get the Blues - The Gaslight Anthem
Pilot Rufly vibes, but sexy!
Can I get a witness, pretty baby? / I still love Tom Petty songs and drivin' old men crazy
It Ainât Me Babe - Bob Dylan
âYou made a choice to be Lily Bass, and we both need you to go do that.â
Go lightly from the ledge, babe / Go lightly on the ground / Iâm not the one you want, babe / I will only let you down
Harvest Moon - Neil Young
Itâs about the lovers to strangers to hostile acquaintances to friends to lovers again.
When we were strangers / I watched you from afar / When we were lovers / I loved you with all my heart
Home From Home - Roo Panes
âWell, itâs Thanksgiving, and I couldnât think of another place that felt more like home.â
Because I'm starting to realise the question worth asking is, who? / I'm starting to realize the question worth answering is you
You Got Lucky - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
I mean. I mean they do fight a lot.
If you don't feel complete / If I don't take you all the way / Then go
Are We Free? - Mick Flannery and Susan OâNeill
I like how this whole song is a dialogue, but always comes together at the chorus
Are we free to understand / or bound to repeat again / all the wars of before?
The Bones feat. Hozier - Maren Morris
âThe king and queen of reconciliationâ - Dan Humphrey
No, it won't always go the way we planned it / But the wolves came and went and we're still standing
Songbird - Fleetwood Mac
They didnât break up, what are you talking about?
And I love you, I love you, I love you / Like never before
Beginning to Feel the Years - Brandi Carlile
And I'm beginning to feel the years / But I'm going to be okay / As long as you're beside me--along the way
Call on Me - Big Brother and the Holding Company
Baby, when you're down and feel so blue / Well, no, you won't drown, honey, I'll be there too
Lily - Benjamin Gibbard
It was too perfect. I had no choice.
Lily is a big brass band who fills the air with song / Lily is a destination and she's where my arms belong
Hard Feelings - Brian Fallon
And the time used to stop in her hands / I could feel it go hesitant / When it rained in Manhattan / We took shelter in the spare room at the Grand
#rufus x lily#lily x rufus#rufly#gossip girl#playlist#source: ggcaps#i swear I've been meaning to post this before the asks I just got today
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Supernatural: Carry On (15x20)
Oh my god. Lol. So... did Andrew Dabb forget to read back through his finale script one final time before deciding it was finished? Because like... Dean says "if we don't keep living, all that sacrifice (Cas and Jack) will be for nothing." Cut to a comically short time later, where Dean dies and is just like "time to go, let's not keep fighting, I'm tired lol."
Like WHAT did I just witness. I'm so grateful, in this moment, to a little show called The Magicians, because in April of 2019 they ended their fourth season with such an egregiously terrible decision that I literally couldn't sleep for a week, I was shaking and intermittently sobbing, I had never felt so betrayed and devastated over any piece of media before. After that, I've sort of become numb to bad endings, and this is no exception. This episode was absolutely terrible and I'm just sort of like... meh. I'll ignore it. Whatever.
I do want to forego the usual "pro" and "con" sections in this review, and do a more traditional full-on ramble about my thoughts, because they're kind of convoluted, if I'm gonna be honest.
The first thing I want to say, is that this wasn't the worst finale I've ever seen. Objectively, it was a terrible episode of TV and an insulting wrap-up to a fifteen-year-show. But I have a very specific category for the worst finales ever, and those are the ones that provide endgame states for the characters that are... unfixable in a post-canon but still-canon-compliant world. So, for example, the How I Met Your Mother finale killed off the titular mother and betrayed years of buildup, and that's a real-world sitcom. There's no resurrecting people from that shit. Or like. Game of Thrones being an obvious recent example. The Rise of Skywalker is a good movie example.
This? It's a little different. The endgame state of Sam and Dean and Cas is that they all die and spend eternity in Heaven, where they get to be with all their loved ones. I mean, sure, we don't get to see that, we only get a throwaway line to imply that Cas made it out of Super Turbo Hell The Empty, but that's the endgame state of the characters. And that's more or less what I would have wanted, as like a... years after canon situation. Right? So yeah, this was a bad episode, but if I edit in the shit I wanted to see, none of it contradicts the canon in a way that's not workable. It's a sad world we've come to where this is all I can really grasp at, but there is a perverse sort of comfort in that.
So, should we talk now about how Dean dying is a betrayal of what they said this whole season, and maybe whole show was about? Ha. It's so ridiculous. It's embarrassing. I watched Dean's final moments and I was embarrassed for Jensen. For Dean. For all of us watching.
Just. Watch the end of 15x19 again, okay? Watch it, and hear what they're saying. Yay, we killed God, we killed the author of the story, which means we get to write our own stories, finally. We get to do that. After all this time, we're finally free. And what does freedom look like? It looks like Dean dying on a run of the mill hunt.
We get this little montage of Sam and Dean at the Bunker, you know? They're doing laundry and going on jogs and cuddling with Miracle the dog, and they're brushing their teeth and going on hunts, I guess. And the emotional resonance from that scene was just kind of... ennui? And boredom? And that's what's so terrible and depressing about this ending. It's so empty, because Dean didn't get to do the thing he said he was fighting for. Sure, he was always fighting for Sam, but he should have been able to fight for himself, too, right? He should have been able to fight for a life after the years of programming. He should have gotten to be a rock star or a chef or worked at an animal shelter or become a foster parent or grown old as Sam's brother, as an uncle to his kid. He should have been able to find love, if he wanted that.
Look, I'm not even mad that Dean died in a "mundane" way. It's not like "nooo Dean is too coooool to die in such a laaaame way, he's a bad-ass and he should have gone out in a blaze of glory!" That's actually not what I'm mad about at all. Sam died old in his bed, and Dean should have been able to do that too. This whole season, since finding out that Chuck was the ultimate big bad, was supposed to be about free will, and Dean never got to figure out a way to be happy and find peace. That's fucking dour and stupid.
I kept saying, in the buildup to this finale, that a depressing, grim-dark ending to this show would be a failing of the themes they set up, and, hey, they didn't go grim-dark, because the writers did not think this was grim-dark. They thought it was powerful and emotional and resonant. You can tell they thought that, even though they're... uh... what's the word. Wrong? Yeah. Wrong. You know what I realized while watching this? It was just a lamer, less resonant and appropriate version of Sam's sacrifice at the end of season five.
Right? Because after Sam yeets himself into hell to save the world, Dean just has to keep going, and as Cas says, "you got what you wanted, more of the same." Just... more of the same. And Dean couldn't hack it, he was miserable without Sam, and Sam came back and we got ten more years of the fucking show. And now... what, we just get that in the other direction? Because Sam is the strong one and can soldier on without Dean because his codependency was a little less crippling? Wow, what a great ending for him, I guess. It doesn't work because we've seen Sam without Dean, and he falls apart too.
And now the show ends with Sam alone. Sure, he gets married to a blur in the background and has a kid, but let me ask you a question, here. Did Sam... want to be a father? I didn't know that was a thing he wanted, that would make him happy, honestly. I had no idea. So this doesn't seem like it works as something even remotely satisfying as an endgame state for him either. It's bleak.
And it's bleaker because there's nobody else in this fucking episode, y'all. The other big theme in all of Supernatural, after "free will" would be "family don't end in blood." And guess what? Apparently it does? Apparently Sam and Dean are each other's whole worlds and nothing else matters? We get... an implied wider world but we don't get to see it. We don't get to see Eileen, Jody, Donna, anybody left alive for Sam. So from the standpoint of characters that we know and give a shit about, Sam loses Cas, Jack, and Dean and lives the rest of his life lonely and sad. Nobody else even comes to Dean's funeral. It's just Sam alone with the dog. Like... that's bleak.
This ending gave the fucking Wincest shippers everything their hearts could desire, for fuck's sake. Like. Why did they cater to that and not follow through on the idea that they had created a family and community beyond each other? You know, this thing called character growth?
To take a brief break from the negativity, I will say something here about Sam and Dean. In the weird hysterical euphoria of the whole Destiel thing a couple weeks ago, I lost sight of something, which is that for me, the draw of this show has always been the relationship between Sam and Dean. I was never a brothers-only person, but it was their fucked up codependent bond that drew me to the show over the years. I loved the idea of Destiel, but I never thought it was going anywhere, so really I loved Castiel, the character, separate from the context of his relationships. Having a big dramatic death scene where Dean says "I love you so much" and there's a forehead touch and Dean saying "it's always been you and me" and confesses that he was scared to get Sam at Stanford because he didn't know how to survive if he didn't have him, and to have Sam say "don't leave me" and then give Dean permission to go... I mean, all of this is catnip, right? All of this is great, like, in isolation, it was such an amazing "broment," as the fandom says. I mean, it made no sense with context, it was utterly insulting in every way, but Jensen and Jared acted their lil' hearts out and I could tell they were really in the moment.
So let's talk about Cas for a second, while I have you here... they never should have done the big gay confession. They just shouldn't have even fucking bothered. I'm telling you, that makes this whole thing worse. It felt completely intentional and weird that Dean never acknowledged the confession, never told Sam, never had a moment where he specifically reckoned with Cas' loss. But that's what I knew would happen. I knew it in my blood and bones, and as the meta started pouring in, I knew people were getting their hopes up for nothing. See, Cas saying "goodbye Dean" and the handprint on the arm... I knew that was their catharsis, that was the writers' and Misha's big goodbye to the character of Castiel. They thought they fucking nailed it. I knew we wouldn't see him again.
Like I said before, I have to be satisfied with an endgame state that doesn't totally suck, right? So, we get this throwaway line from Bobby that Jack fixed Heaven and made it not suck, and that Cas helped. This implies a multitude of things that are... comforting. At least Cas doesn't get that dour, dark, helpless oblivion that I worried he'd get. We can assume Jack plucked him out of the Empty, that he gets to be with his son, and that, if the fic writers so choose, Dean and Cas can have lots of gay sex up in Heaven. I think Misha not being in this finale was frankly a slap in the face to one of the biggest and most important characters the show has ever seen, you know? And I think that they kept him out of it so we could have Schrodinger's Destiel. Because if we'd seen Cas in heaven, and he hadn't confessed his big gay love, Dean could have been like: "hey Cas! Buddy! Good to see you, my friend." But since we did have the love confession, whatever Dean did upon seeing Cas would have to mean something in that context. So instead we didn't get to see him at all.
Which is stupid.
Also stupid is that the big sacrifice was to save Dean's life and then a couple weeks later he gets impaled on a rusty nail and dies anyway. Thanks for making the whole thing feel so utterly pointless and empty. No pun intended. Wow, they did Misha dirty, here, didn't they.
Turning back to Sam's ending, let's just talk about that for a minute. Like I said, I'm happy he got to live a long life and die an old man, what Dean always wanted for him. But nothing about that ending was more poignant because Dean was gone. In fact, it just made it super duper depressing and lame. There was no reason Dean couldn't have gotten a happy life, too. It adds nothing that he died young and unfulfilled. Like, you know how people joke about the end of the Titanic, where you see that Rose's Heaven is reuniting with Jack and everyone else on the ship, and people will say "well, gosh, that's kind of a slap in the face to Rose's family" since she clearly got married and had kids and grandkids? This is literally that! Like, having an ending where a young-again Sam Winchester gets to Heaven, and his whole Heaven, the thing that he needed to find peace after death, was a return to his brother... look, I'm not mad about that, but what the fuck about nameless blurry wife that we couldn't even confirm to be Eileen for some reason? What about everyone else?
And did Sam... keep hunting? Did he go to law school? Maybe there were background details that confirmed what he ended up doing with the rest of his life besides becoming a husband and father, but I didn't see evidence of it because I was too busy rolling my eyes out of my skull at how dumb this all was. So Sam just gets a generic "raking leaves in the yard" ending, like we saw for Dean at the end of season five, with nothing to challenge that. Even though we've seen why life outside of hunting, life without Dean, isn't satisfying for Sam, we're now supposed to accept it as how he spends the rest of his life, without seeing him put the work in to get there?
One thing I realized watching this episode is that it tries to play the middle. Like, with the Cas thing, they didn't want to make his noble gay sacrifice totally meaningless, so they couldn't just pop him back into the story, but they did give us one single throwaway line to reassure fans that he's not still in The Empty. So, people who don't give a shit about Cas can assume he's off being Jack's assistant and doesn't really interact with humans in Heaven. People who do give a shit about one of the show's main characters can assume that he has a home in Dean's little Heaven neighborhood too, and they all get to buddy around for eternity. People who don't like Eileen? Well, Sam married some nobody who we never got to meet. People who liked her? Well, you can't prove that wasn't Eileen, can you? Even Dean driving around in the impala waiting for Sam to die so he could finally be happy with his fucking soulmate or whatever. Time in Heaven is weird, Bobby says. It's metaphorical. You could assume that the driving montage was actually intercut with other moments, with Dean getting to see dear old mom (and dad, I guess, but ugh), and spending time with Bobby, with OG Charlie, with other familiar faces, and new ones as they finally reach their own deaths on Earth and come up to party with the rest of the gang.
Like, in a better show, in a world without Covid, maybe they had plans along these lines, to get more guest characters back and show Dean getting sappy hellos to a bunch of side characters in Heaven. To be quite honest, I would not have been mad about that. If you're going to make Dean die young and never give him the chance to find out who he could have been when the choices were all his own, which is, in case I haven't made that clear, a horrendous and insulting ending for his character... at the very least you could have given us the cheesiness of seeing him hug his friends in Heaven. Jeezus.
I want to hammer in this point one more time before I wrap up: they ended the show by saying that character development didn't matter. They had Dean's dying speech be a meta reference to the pilot episode of the show, they had him saying "it's always been you and me" and then they confirmed that with everything they had. Sam became a father, but did he have a happy life? Seems like he pined away for his dead brother for decades and then died. If the pilot had never happened, if Sam had stayed at Stanford and Dean had gone on hunting by himself, you know what would have happened? Sam would have had a "normal" life and married a woman and had a kid, I guess, and grown old, and Dean would have died fighting some vampires in a barn. This show has been on for fifteen years, and the ending did not honor anything about the journey the characters had been on.
A particularly egregious example is the early scene with the pie festival, where Sam is like "I'm sad about Cas and Jack" and Dean is like "if we don't go on living it won't honor their sacrifice" like... yeah, I get it, bringing people back from the dead time and time again is supposed to be a bad thing that Sam and Dean did for each other because they were selfish. So Sam giving Dean permission to go was supposed to be a growth moment. Sam and Dean accepting that Cas was gone and not even asking Jack to make sure he got sent to a happy eternity instead of oblivion, that's supposed to mean they've learned their lesson. And what a fucking lesson to leave things off on. Jesus, this is grim.
So like. As I try to figure out what to say at the end of this review, I will point out one glimmer of light in the darkness, which is that this finale isn't going to ruin the rewatchability of the show for me. I can still come back and re-watch without feeling like the whole thing is ruined by the ending. It's more than I can say for some other shows.
But honestly, if this was the ending we were going to get? Why the fuck not leave it open-ended? I did not enjoy 15x19 particularly well, but at least that episode left them on the open road, with a wide future ahead of them. Anything might have happened. It's their turn to write the story, right? Chuck is dead, the writer is "dead", the show is over, and now the possibilities are endless. That would have been an anticlimactic ending, for sure. But this ending just turns around and slaps the whole point of that first ending in the face and says "haha bitch you thought". They don't get to write their own stories. We see exactly how those stories end, and it's lame. Leave something to the imagination, yo. Leave it vague how and when they died, what their lives turned into. Show them in Heaven, getting to their peace at last, reuniting with their friends, including Cas. Put in a significant glance between Dean and Cas, and leave it to the internet to go wild about what it could mean. And never answer when fans ask "so what happened, when did they die? Did they keep hunting?" Just leave it vague. If this was the only ending they could come up with, I'd rather be left with questions.
This finale gets a low score from me, because they couldn't even pull on the right heartstrings to make me sentimental...
4/10
But the show as a whole? Well, it was a mess, and it had some seriously high highs and some devastatingly low lows. It's a bummer that the lowest low came in how they tried to wrap up the whole shebang, but like I said, this ending isn't going to ruin the whole fifteen-year run for me. We get to make up what happens next, and we can make Jack's new and improved Heaven our post-canon fix-it haven. I don't think there's ever been a show in my life quite like Supernatural. The fandom is so bonkers. The meta narrative of the show is so convoluted and twisty and goes in so many unexpected directions. I liked watching this show for its own sake, and also as like... an anthropologist trying to discover something about humanity and American values specifically. It wasn't always a pleasant experience, but it was one I know I'll never forget. My heart tells me to give the show as a whole a high score, representing the many, many hours of joy and dread and delight and horror I got over the near decade I've personally been watching. How do you wrap up fifteen years in a score out of ten?
9/10
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Essential Avengers: Avengers #222: A Gathering of Evil!
August, 1982
You know, I havenât really thought about how long its been since the Avengers have dealt with the Masters of Evil.
The Masters are the Avengersâ evil opposite team. The Brotherhood of Evil Mutants to their X-Men. The Legion of Doom to their Justice League. The Revengers to their Avengers.
But the Avengers havenât had to deal with the Masters of Evil since Avengers #83. And in that appearance, they took a backseat to the real master of evil. FEMINISM.
At least according to Roy Thomas.
But yeah. Its been a while without the Masters of Evil. And, uh, any team with Whirlwind has a long way to climb for credibility. Yeah, I said it. He doesnât wear a shirt.
Also, they put She-Hulk in her at-the-time Iconic She-Hulk Outfit. This is another case of the cover lying. The reality is, somehow, even more embarrassing for her.
Last time: the Avengers had a membership drive because you can only be a kooky quartet for so long. She-Hulk and Hawkeye were recruited and took an instant dislike to each other.
Because She-Hulk cut off Hawkeye in traffic and Hawkeye proportionately responded by breaking her car.
Fun!
So lets get to it.
We start with She-Hulk trying to fix her car.
Annnnd sheâs throwing random pieces out of the hood. I donât think she knows much about auto-repair.
When the electrical system zaps her, she gets so angry that she smashes the car flat like sheâs a Street Fighter. Then she jams the wreckage into a public trashcan - also flattening that.
Alas, She-Hulkâs pink Cadillac. You graced our lives for far too short a time. And were taken from us by that heinous bowman Hawkeye. This is the sin which I will always hold against him.
Wasp rolls into the scene, tsking about She-Hulkâs behavior being bad for the Avengersâ image. And hey, yeah! I do like that She-Hulk trying to fix a car in front of the mansion before getting fed-up and breaking it is a good indication that sheâs not going to be your typical Avenger.
But despite the tsk sheâs not too serious about the admonishment. She even congratulates She-Hulk on getting rid of the car, as it clashed with her skin color.
Reasonably enough, She-Hulk asks who made Wasp the expert.
Except, Wasp did. Wasp made Wasp an expert. Sheâs literally a professional fashion designer. But relatedly, sheâs designed a whole new wardrobe for She-Hulk and canât wait to dress her up.
I kind of wonder if Wasp views new female teammates as potential canvasses.
Later on, in the Busiek run, sheâll design a new outfit for Firestar pretty much without any input from Firestar herself. And it had an incredibly plunging neckline that Firestar was very uncomfortable with.
If Wasp offers to fashion design for you, feel flattered and a little bit afraid.
Anyway, She-Hulk decides well might be nice to try on a bunch of new clothes.
Yâknow, She-Hulk is a bit of a fashion person herself. In her original solo book she started the âoops I flexed and my sleeves fell offâ fashion.
Meanwhile, elsewhere, Tony Stark at Stark International.
Big boss himself came down to the Long Island office because one of his programmers has asked for time off.
Brennerâs son is sick and he needs to pick him up from school. BUT: heâs in the middle of a complicated computer project!
Like the idealized fictional caring billionaire that he is, Tony is completely understanding.
Tony Stark, what a guy: âWell, your son is more important than any computer program, take the rest of the day off -- with pay.â
If you end up stuck in the Marvel universe somehow, see about swinging a job with Tony Stark. Tony Stark makes you feel/heâs the cool exec with the heart of steel.
Tony decides heâll get Ordinary Electrical Engineer Scott Lang to finish the programming work.
Ordinary Electrical Engineer Scott Lang is happy to pick up the project but since Tony Stark is in the room anyway, Scott asks if Iron Man has mentioned any news of Hank Pym.
For you see, although you might think that this Scott Lang is an Ordinary Electrical Engineer, he is actually the new Ant-Man so he feels indebted to Hank Pym.
Tony responds that there hasnât been any news since Hank Pym went to jail so Scott asks why the Avengers havenât done anything for him. Tony claims that thereâs not a lot that the Avengers can do for him until his case comes to trial.
You could hire him a good lawyer? Or pay for that therapy that you thought he needed?
I guess I donât know that Tony isnât doing these things off-screen, to be fair.
Tony further claims that Hank will do fiiiine in jail, because heâs tough. Scott remains dubious since heâs actually been to jail and knows what its like. But thereâs only so much you can contradict the boss, even if heâs idealized fictional caring billionaire Tony Stark.
And anyway, Tony has other things on his mind. Heâs more worried about Jan than he is about Hank. Sheâs way too well-adjusted for having gotten divorced after her marriage turned miserable. According to Tony Stark anyway.
Of course, his major misunderstanding is that he thinks âshe had [Hank] to lean on for so many yearsâ when it was more the other way around. The Jan he thought he knew was actually playing the role of the Hank Pym Hype Squad.
Meanwhile, we check in on Steve Rogers.
One thing I appreciate about this run of Avengers is that we have more of a sense of what the Avengers are doing when not Avengersing. The Avengers book feels a lot more keyed into the rest of the related Marvel universe.
For example, Steve actually got some art jobs! It looks like comics book actually! And he does art for advertisements too!
And heâs living that glamorous artist life of staying up all night to finish pages and then going âoh shit my day jobâ when his alarm rings for the Avengers meeting.
Although heâs actually looking forward to getting the costume on and getting away from dealing with ad executives and art editors for a while.A good olâ several hours in the Avengers gym will help work out the art desk bad posture knots out of his shoulders.
And elsewhere in Chicago, Illinois, where Ordinary Doctor Donald Blake has moved to attempt to make a life for himself separate from Thor. Heâs doubtful whether he actually can.
I sorta wonder what the status quo in the Thor books is like because usually when Dr. Donald Blake shows up in the Avengers book, heâs been like a wandering expert doctor, just passing through. Showing up to do the tough medical jobs. Heâs settling down in Chicago now.
But at least the thousand mile commute to the weekly Avengers meeting is no problem for THOR!
Now that Hawkeye is on the Avengers again, heâs part of the round of checking in. Heâs clocking out of the security chief job at Cross Technological Enterprises. His colleagues all envying how he gets to set his own hours.
He takes a train from Yonkers to his new Central Park West apartment. I donât know if you remember his living conditions before he got the job at Cross Technological but it was a bit suck. Heâs definitely put his steady paycheck to use improving his digs.
Old (from issue #189):
New (from issue #this issue):
Although maybe too much. Because when he gets home he realizes that he has almost no food in his apartment and also no money until payday.
Hawkeye: âWhere the heck does $1200 a week go, anyway? I donât play Pac-Man that much! There was more change in my pocket in the old carny days!â
Psst, Hawkeye. Definitely sign up for the stipend check from Stark.
Another thousand a week will go a long way to keeping you living the can afford food standard of living youâre accustomed to.
He manages to find a bag of potato chips to snack on but decides heâll have to see if he can find an actual square meal at Avengers Mansion.
Likely. Jarvis seems the sort to keep the fridge well-stocked and heck heâd probably make something if asked.
Anyway, Hawkeye being Hawkeye, heâs not going to take the elevator or stairs. Heâs definitely going to fire a cable arrow so he can swing down from his balcony. Because, of course he is. Heâs Hawkeye.
And he lands right in front of a taxi, the driver of which calls him a nut
Hawkeye: âYou want a star in your cab or not?â
Turns out? No. Hawkeye has to walk to Avengers Mansion and arrives late because the cabbie wonât give him a free ride.
Meanwhile at Avengers Mansion (which fails to elicit the same kneejerk emotional response as âmeanwhile at the HALL of JUSTICEâ from me), the She-Hulk clothing montage has occurred off-screen.
For shaaaame, James Shooter. And also Steven Grant.
She-Hulk isnât so sure about the outfit Wasp put together for her.
Wasp: âI call it Arabian Night -- a blend of suppleness, strength and sensitivity to highlight your true nature!â
She-Hulk: âDonât you think itâs a little... unusual?â
Wasp: âYouâre an unusual woman, Jennifer! Your clothes should say that! We want a complete image thatâll drive me wild at the sight of you!â
She-Hulk: âGot anything thatâll drive that jerk Hawkeye one way to oblivion?â
I donât know if fashion can do that but if anyone could design that, Wasp could. Her or Giger.
Wasp tries to defend Hawkeye but can only manage âheâs okay, just a little... um, well, you know!â but suggests that She-Hulk just be nice to Hawkeye to throw him off.
Which. Sounds like a funny idea.
Anyway, I like the outfit. The colors work for her. And maybe itâs because there are a couple Dragon Ball outfits like this but it feels appropriate for her. Because of the punching.
Iron Man comes in and goes ga-ga multiple punctuation over She-Hulkâs new look, which I guess proves that Wasp hit where she was aiming.
Wasp: âOh, more flattery! More! I love it! And this is just the beginning. Wait until you see the fighting togs Iâm designing for her!â
So I guess that this is just an outfit to look good in and Wasp is still working on the superhero outfit. Canât wait to see it.
Captain America and Thor come in and Thor too praises She-Hulkâs new look.
Thor: âBy Odinâs beard! What emerald beauty stands before us?â
They date later. Its one of those âwow expected this to happen way sooner than 2018 honestlyâ things.
And then Hawkeye comes in.
He also loses his shit over She-Hulkâs new look. But in more of a Hawkeye way.
Hawkeye: âWaitaminit! Is it Cheryl Tiegs? Loni Anderson? No! Itâs the new fashion plate -- the Savage She-Hulk! Talk about trying to get silk purses from sowâs ears!â
Youâre a rude, Hawkeye.
She-Hulk storms towards him, offended, and just lifts him bodily.
And kisses him.
Then drops his ass on the ground.
I guessss remembering and putting her own spin on Waspâs suggestion?
People need to stop kissing each other for spite and revenge reasons, honestly.
I do get a laugh at Hawkwye demanding a rematch. Canât imagine what form thatâd take. But its funny.
I kind of have a problem with the scene, beyond the people kissing each other for spite and revenge thing. Prior to joining the Avengers, the issue where She-Hulk got her pink Cadillac was Marvel Two-In-One #88 where she spent nearly the entire issue hitting on the Thing to his discomfort. And the joke was Ha Ha Sexually Assertive Women.
I really hope that we do not have that again.
Anyway, the other Avengers get some yuks over She-Hulkâs method of shutting up Hawkeye.
Iron Man even suggests that Hawkeye and She-Hulk have just had their first date to Hawkeyeâs dismay.
Seriously, someone write an Avengers code of conduct and then create an HR department.
MEANWHILE, CHANGING THE TOPIC AND THE SCENE
In Eggheadâs secret Manhattan laboratory.
Egghead: âNo, itâs not fair! All I ever wanted was to rule the world -- is that so much to ask? Iâm 52. That doesnât give me many years left -- that idiot Henry Pym blew what may have been my last chance!â
Hah at Egghead having a baby tantrum over being thwarted. And I guess good to know that Hank screwing up the plan by calling the Avengers did screw over more than Hank Pym.
Hank may have saved the world, actually. Good job, Hank.
Egghead laments that he wishes he had another good plan but kind of put all the eggs, hah, in the unstoppable adamantium robots basket.
And then his sexy maid Anna chimes in with a suggestion.
Wait, why does Egghead of all villains have a sexy maid? Who seems to have a crush on him? Why is this a thing? Who in or out of universe looks at Egghead and thinks âyes this man is a sexual dynamoâ?
Eh, whatever.
Anna: âVhy donât choo just buy the vorld, darlkink?â
Egghead: âAnna! Vhat... er, what did you say?â
Anna: âYou should make a lot ov money und buy the vorld!â
Egghead: âWork?! Disgusting!â
This is probably the only time I will ever be able to say this but I agree with Egghead.
Anna: âNo, no, no! Just invent somethink that everyvun vants -- a cure for baldness, mebbe... or eternal youth!â
Egghead: âThatâs silly, Anna! Or is it?â
IT IN FACT WASNâT!
Egghead suddenly stands up, dumping sexy maid Anna to the floor, as he realizes that sheâs right! If Egghead could invent cell rejuvenation to give people eternal youth, the world would be his oyster! People would give anything for it!
Granted, he has no idea how to invent cell rejuvenation but thatâs tomorrowâs problem. Todayâs problem is the logistics. Heâll need research, money, equipment and most importantly of all lackeys to steal all that stuff for him so he wonât have to Effort!
So moments later, Egghead signals a robot spy capsule that he has monitoring Atlantis at all times just because.
Eggheadâs spy capsule launches a guided missile at an Atlantean prison, busting out someone mysterious unless you happened to glance at the cover.
And we go from one prison to another prison to pop in on Hank Pym at Rykerâs Island.
Rykerâs is apparently the go-to supervillain prison.
And whoops Hank Pym is one now, at least according to the law. What with being caught with all that stolen adamantium and the mind control prosthetic arm.
Hank Pym: âIt just doesnât make sense! All I tried to do was redeem myself, but things just got out of control! Eggheadâs responsible for this! He committed the crime Iâm accused of -- and made sure I canât prove it! Why doesnât anyone believe me?â
Probably because you did do the crime and were caught in the act and you wouldnât explain yourself fully afterward. Just saying.
Hank Pym: âJan! Thatâs where it all went wrong! If I could get her back, everything would work out! I know it!â
Hank Hank Hank... Youâre suddenly a romantic.
A guard yells at Hank that its food time and then further yells that his son had looked up to Hank, which causes Hank to reflect whoops he let down more than just Jan and the Avengers.
When Hank sits down to eat prison chow, heâs accosted by Dave Cannon aka WHIRLWIND aka I guess Hankâs backup archnemesis?
Hank isnât really spoiled for choice with good archnemeses so he either has Egghead or spin around real fast man.
At least Dave Cannon aka Whirlwind is trying to go for the personal lowblow. Thatâs a decent, if gross, archnemesis move.
He insinuates that hey if Jan divorced Hank that means Dave has a chance with her and heâs going to visit her as soon as he jailbreaks out of here today.
Iâm sure he does have a chance. Like a snowballâs in hell, maybe.
Hank tells Dave to shut up because shut up, Dave.
But Dave ups the ante by suggesting that after Hank Pym gets out of jail in maybe ten or twenty years, he and Jan will hire Hank to be their chauffeur.
So Hank smashes a tray of food in Daveâs face because shut up, Dave.
He also starts punching him because in for a penny.
And because Hank totally started that âfightâ the guards haul Hank off for a month in solitary.
You wouldnât think Hankâs life could get worse in every issue he appears in but you would be wrong.
And wouldnât you know it? As soon as Hank is out of the room, the jailbreak starts without him.
He doesnât even get to participate in activities now! Geez, Dave Cannon! Youâre ruining prison for Hank.
Anyway, the mysterious figure from the Atlantis jailbreak scene is now jailbreaking Rykerâs and iiiiiits TIGER SHARK!
A guy I know almost nothing about!
-google- Ah, Namor foe. That explains him being a shark man.
He used to be an Olympic swimmer who injured his spinal cord when he rescued a drowning man. So a pretty good guy, starting off. Then to heal his spine he participated in an experimental procedure where Namor and tiger shark DNA was blended with his own and he became a shark man and an asshole.
I think thatâs the Namor DNA personally. It makes people into jerks. And Namor is 100% Namor DNA so you can imagine what a jerk he is.
Iâve gotten lost in the weeds.
Tiger Shark busts in through a supposedly impregnable prison wall. The guards try to shoot him with âspecial weaponsâ but Tiger Shark thwarts them with a special weapon of his own.
A TABLE!
Which he uses to block the shots and then hit them with.
They were fools to put their faith in high-falutinâ technology when they could have been investing in low-falutinâ carpentry.
Thatâs right, they should have gotten wooden guns.
With the guards tabled for now, Tiger Shark collects Scorpion and Whirlwind.
Thatâs two supervillains on his shopping list but thereâs one more to get.
So the three detour over down to the womenâs wing while the jailbreak of everyone else keeps the guards very busy.
And they find Dr. Karla Sofen, Ordinary Criminal Psychologist who got superpower from a space rock. Yâknow, a Moonstone.
She has a few follow-up questions before she throws in with these goons but Tiger Shark isnât a good conversationalist.
Tiger Shark: âYou wanna get snuffed right here, lady?! Move! Negotiations are closed!â
She grudgingly accepts these terms. The caption box says so.
The four supervillains take a remote controlled escape boat and escape on a boat.
Later, in a safehouse on Long Island Sound, the four supervillains are all costumed up and already feeling cooped up with each other. It is a small house and they are all big personalities.
Tiger Shark and Whirlwind even get into a fight when Tiger Shark complains about waiting and about suburbia and Whirlwind tells him to shut up. And by fight I mean Tiger Shark smacks Whirlwind in the head. Because its Whirlwind.
Ant-Manâs backup archnemesis. And Tiger Shark fights Namor. Its a mismatch.
But its enough of a âfightâ to cause a stir.
Egghead: âStop your silly squabbling! Fighting among yourselves wonât further my plans!â
Moonstone: âWha -- ?! Egghead?!â
Tiger Shark: âWhatâs an Egghead?â
Hah.
I donât know why this exchange amuses me so much.
Egghead is perfectly happy to introduce himself slash ramble on and on with words words words. He is PERHAPS the worldâs greatest genius (hahahahah noooo) but says he may find a cure to Tiger Sharkâs ârepugnant amphibious condition.â
Egghead: âIf you all follow me without question, youâll share in my forthcoming power and wealth! In addition to being bodyguards, youâll perform various tasks for me -- beginning tonight, when you loot a certain Manhattan medical research center to obtain data and supplies! Cross me -- and no one will ever hear from you again!â
Iâll make fun of Egghead any day of the week but Iâll give him this. He evidently delivers this speech with such conviction that âshark man who fights Namorâ just nods and apparently thinks yes this sounds legit.
And lets be honest, between Whirlwind, Scorpion, Moonstone, and Tiger Shark none of them look at this eggheaded guy threatening them and think about trying something.
Egghead appoints Moonstone his deputy and team leader. Because, he says, sheâs such a well-trained follower.
Okay, okay, okay. Okay.
So, Dr. Karla Sofen first appeared as a henchwoman to Dr. Faustus.
But then she tricked the original Moonstone into giving the moonstone to her and became the new Moonstone. And here I didnât even know there was an original Moonstone.
My point being, yes, early on you might look at Moonstoneâs history and think âyes sheâs definitely a subordinate person who wonât give me troubleâ but from a modern perspective?
I know Modern Moonstone for basically being the Starscream of whatever team sheâs on. Starting from Thunderbolts at least, sheâs never the boss, sheâs happy being the deputy but sheâs always scheming and manipulating and undermining her boss.
I really want this to be a hilariously bad judge of character Egghead has made. I really do.
Meanwhile, Whirlwind thinks that heâll play along with Eggheadâs plans. Until he gets bored.
And then I guess he gets bored like five seconds later because he decides that since the job Egghead wants them to do isnât until evening, he can go visit Wasp.
And yeah. We scene transition to Avengers Mansion and Whirlwind is just lurking in the bushes spying on Waspâs limo.
Inside the mansion, with the Avengersâ meeting over, the Avengers all get ready to go about the rest of their business.
Hawkeye saying he has to get home gets She-Hulk to start musing on how she hasnât had a real home since she left Los Angeles.
Which she did for... reasons? She seemed like she was going to stay in LA at the end of her original Savage She-Hulk book. She probably did it so she could do crossovers. That makes sense.
Wasp tells She-Hulk that since Tony doesnât charge rent, She-Hulk can just stay at Avengers Mansion for a while. And in a couple days, sheâll take She-Hulk apartment hunting.
Wasp is a good friend.
She heads out to her limo and tells Mr. Carrothers to take her to her Manhattan apartment.
BUT WHOOPS iiiiiiiiiits Whirlwind!
He knocked out Mr. Carrothers over the head and stashed him in the bushes. Wow, being Waspâs chauffeur is very eventful.
Whirlwind: âForget him. Iâm the man in your life now! I figure with your ex in the slammer, youâre gonna need an understanding shoulder to lean on -- .â
And then Wasp shrinks down and shoots Whirlwind in the face.
Wasp: âThatâs awfully considerate of you. But next time send flowers first, okay? By the way, have you ever met me bio-electric sting?â
Get rekt, Whirlwind.
This has been a really good span of issues for Wasp. Iâm boggling a little. My standards werenât super high to be honest but this has been good.
I mean, aside from her wearing her Avengers #194-196 costume again. The one with only one pant leg. Of all your costumes to wear under normal clothes, why this one, Jan?
Outside the limo, Hawkeye is trying to sneak back into the mansion to raid the pantry and hoping everyone else has gone.
Because he doesnât want them to know that two-jobs Hawkeye is having money trouble, I guess? But dude, just confide in Jarvis. Heâs a good guy.
Anyway, point being, because of Hawkeyeâs hungry little tummy, he sneaks back to the mansion in time to see flashes of energy from inside Janâs limo.
Hawkeye runs to Janâs rescue and instantly gets blasted by Moonstone who has just arrived to yell at Whirlwind for taking off without her permission.
Whirlwind says he doesnât have to answer to Moonstone and a presumably very frustrated Moonstone answers yes he does, that is the very thing he has agreed to when he joined the new Masters of Evil!
I feel maybe announcing loudly that you are the new Masters of Evil right in front of the Avengers is kind of jumping the gun.
Not to mention having the whole time show up to pose like a team just to pull Whirlwindâs butt out of the fire but like I said, this isnât a very impressive seeming iteration of the Masters.
They do have this much, at least. Hawkeye recognizes each one of these bozos (muffled foghorns from Titan Up the Defense way) and recognizes that he and Wasp are outpowered in addition to being outnumbered.
Reinforced by Tiger Shark just smacking Wasp out of the air.
I think her one legged outfit is slowing her down.
So Hawkeye fires a flare arrow to try to summon help.
Remember when the Avengers had radio rings? Thatâd probably be a less obvious way to signal for help. Because Moonstone sees Hawkeye shoot a flare arrow that LIGHTS UP THE AREA and shoots him for sending up a signal.
And then she turns to the others and goes âWhy didnât you blunderers stop him?â
Its a good point. Tiger Shark points out though that she didnât stop him either.
Again: not a very impressive iteration of the team.
Whirlwind, trying to put on the pragmatic hat way too late, says that they should kill Hawkeye and skedaddle because fighting in front of Avengers Mansion makes him nervous.
But heâs still Whirlwind so heâs still gross so he thinks to himself that he wants to grab Wasp before they go.
And what, dude? You gonna keep her under your bed? WHATS YOUR CREEPY ENDGAME?
On second thought, I donât want to know. Geez, this is awful but Iâm glad that Wasp died in Ultimate comics before an exceptionally creepy Ultimate Whirlwind could show up and keep her in a well or something.
Hey, maybe if we tell Whirlwind that Living Laser is also obsessed with Wasp, the two will fight to the death and I wonât have to deal with either one!
Anyway. Off-track. Anyway.
With a sound of thunder, a Perfectly Ordinary Uru Hammer THOOMs by smacking every villain before returning to Thorâs hand.
Yeah, fighting in front of Avengers Mansion? Really dumb!
Thor: âStand back, perfidious mortals, or face the wrath of Thor!â
Wasp: âHuh? Thor! I always thought you were handsome -- but you never looked better than you do now!â
Thor: âFair Wasp, thou art safe in my hands!â
Wasp: (Mmmm! Donât I wish!)
Well, youâre free to play the field now, Wasp. Go for it.
Meanwhile, over in Avengers Mansion, She-Hulk hears the racket and gets up from her nap to see a supervillain battle taking place on the street in front of the Mansion and just kind of sighs about New York being like this.
Again again: fighting in front of Avengers Mansion? REALLY DUMB!
Moonstone even realizes it.
Moonstone: âThis is insane -- wasting our energy battling the Avengers for nothing! Weâve got to end this fight and escape!â
She tells Scorpion to take Thor which either shows a high esteem of him or a very low regard. Either way, Scorpion is happy to try, tail-whipping Thor through the air.
Inside the mansion, She-Hulk decides that the only way to get some peace and quiet is to throw hands. Side benefit: sheâll also get to prove herself to the Avengers.
But I like that the primary reason is that she just wants to have a dang nap and this nonsense is preventing it.
So she OH YEAHs through the window because heck Tony Stark will pay to fix it and runs towards the battle.
Haha look at that tiny alarmed Jarvis in the window. I love that kind of background detail. Amazing.
Wasp takes a break from, I dunno fantasizing about Thor, to fly over in a panic.
Wasp: âOh, no! That outfit is an original! Tear it -- and Iâll never speak to you again!â
She sure has her priorities. I think maybe she doesnât think these new Masters of Evil are all that threatening.
Maybe she shouldnât be so worried though. She-Hulk just jumped through a glass window and the outfit looks untouched.
She-Hulk: âYou canât be serious?! You are. Ohhh... fudge! This is ridiculous!â
She definitely had to stop herself from saying an f-bomb.
So She-Hulk stops running to help Thor and sits down to start pulling the Van Dyne Original outfit off so Wasp wonât friend break up with her.
Iâm sure Thor is doing fine though.
Ha ha, just kidding.
Moondragon is keeping him pinned down with her laser blasts and Tiger Shark hits him with something almost as powerful as TABLE.
A CAR.
Tiger Shark: âThat Avenger creep thinks heâs the strongest there is. Me, I can withstand the pressures of the oceanâs floor without breathing hard. So when youâre talking strength -- youâre talking Tiger Shark!â
Hey, cool! Its the same thing writers use to argue Aquaman Strong Actually. I wonder if this actually predates that. Itâd be funny if Tiger Shark preempted Aquaman in anything.
Wasp (while blasting Scorpion in his Scorpion neck) asks Thor if heâs okay but I think Thor is more annoyed than endangered by being ganged up on by the villains.
Thor: âAye, the villainâs cowardly attack availed him naught against the might of Thor! I would see this battle ended!â
Tiger Shark basically says ânuh uhâ or âTogether we can turn him into hamburger!â but then someone punches Tiger Shark from behind and knocks him out.
Scorpion: âWho in -- ? Some chick from Frederickâs of Hollywood?â
She-Hulk: âDonât tell me you donât know who I am! I donât want to hear it!â
So, yeah, She-Hulk has arrived. In her underwear. So she doesnât offend Wasp.
I guess after the Moondragon arc, Wasp is paying forward the wardrobe embarrassments.
Very rude, Jan.
Hawkeye is also up and raring to arrow. And he nails Whirlwind with said shock arrow annnd knocks him out.
Yup, this is the part of the book where weâre running out of pages so the villains start going down really easy.
Next, Wasp shoots Moonstone and She-Hulk multi-tasks by punching Moonstone into Scorpion and knocking both of them out.
Which means that She-Hulk is MVP of this fight. She arrives the latest but knocks out the most people. Good job, She-Hulk. Even Hawkeye admits that she did pretty good (qualified with âfor a beginner!â which She-Hulk just laughs off.)
Meanwhile, in his hidden laboratory, Egghead is thinking that you canât get good help these days.
Egghead: âFools! We would have destroyed the Avengers eventually! There was no need to upset my timetable!â
But its only a minor setback and he considers that this stomp may leave them more willing to see that his ideas are best ideas.
I really hope that everyone pins the blame on Whirlwind when Egghead inevitably has to break them out of prison again to assemble his Masters of Evil again.
Hm, and I didnât wonder this before but why Masters of Evil as a team name? He has no connection with any of the previous iterations, I donât think. Weird.
Back at the mansion, the Avengers stand around being pretty pleased with themselves for beating up a bunch of people who attacked them for no reason and sucked at it.
The only sour note is that Wasp lost yet another limo (to Tiger Sharkâs deadly CAR attack) but even then she says she was ready to trade it in on a DeLorean anyway.
Wait, arenât DeLoreans known for having disappointing performance for a car and adequate performance as a time machine? Wasp, why are you getting a DeLorean, you kook!
She-Hulk, who sold her dignity to keep Janâs friendship, suggests that the two of them go looking for new cars together.
OH RIGHT. Issue started with She-Hulkâs poor lamented pink Cadillac being junked. Thatâs bookends, it is. Theyâre the Sisterhood of the Broken Cars now.
So a very decent story!
Stuff is being setup with Egghead, the Hank Pym plot thread is still going, and weâve got a new Avengers roster to settle into.
Although. Between the Moondragon arc and this, Iâm wondering if clothing mishaps is going to be a running joke going forward and I hope not. Or at least let the guys in on it. Let Thor get locked out of the house in his underwear. It is only fair.
To the readers, if not the characters.
Although, I guess that is kind of what happened in the Molecule Man story. Tony Stark stuck in only his underwear and had to wear Ordinary Doctor Donald Blakeâs jacket around his waist.
Not much more to say about this. Its a solid issue.
Follow @essential-avengersâ. Because: reasons. Also like and reblog. Because: similar but different reasons. Selling myself is hard.
#Avengers#Masters of Evil#Egghead#the Wasp#She Hulk#Hawkeye#Thor#essential avengers#Whirlwind is a creep#She Hulk's sweet new threads#f in chat for She Hulk's pink cadillac#She Hulk kisses hawkeye and its terrible for everyone#including you#essential marvel liveblogging
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Maria watches friday night lights (#24)
Iâm here! The final season! 5x01, here we go.
âDonât you just love summer in Texas? 7 am and Iâm already sweating like a whore in church.â This, set against the montage of summer in Dillon with trash pick up and kids running through a sprinkler, is true perfection.
letâs dive in, under the cut:
Lol is that Tinker driving alongside Vince and Luke running? Hilarious/wholesome image.
Buddy as a radio host really truly makes so much sense. Why didnât they think of this sooner lmao
Oh my babe Tim!! on the inside but heâs getting out in three months, ok I see that
âI kinda coached you.â âCoach was my coach, billy.â Lmao âYou could be a little more enthusiastic.â âSorry, Billy, but im in prison.â Uh yeah. read the room, Billy!
Oh Tim, my poor babe đ wants to be visited *less* by his brother and friend. Abolish prisonssssss ugh
Oh Tami coming into the first staff meeting and immediately proposing the rest of the staff do more work probably isnât the most strategic choice lol
This reminds me a lot of teacher meetings in season 4 of The Wire, with all of the staff talking about particular problem children the system is failing. And oh boy they all hate a teenage girl named Epyck. âI just wish she wouldnât come into school.â Uh you should not be a teacher, miss! But also: you all need more resources.
Jess and Vince are as cute as I knew theyâd be omg. âI thought you might need help with the laundry.â OKKKK
Ugh poor Becky! her dad is so gross. Sheâs stuck with herâIâm sureâevil stepmother and half sister? Major yikes!
The idea of Billy working for Eric Taylor is...interesting. And his argument is basically âyou are inspirational and could make me a better person under your influence.â Man, only a mediocre white dude could get away with this!
Yessss Devin is still here playing in a band with Landry and that drummer whose name I canât remember â oh jimmy okay! Devin is still the coolest character in this town.
Wow Landry is playing a show with his hometown band the night before leaving for college? Thatâs...a choice!
Oh geez something about Buddy and Eric watching mainly Black kids play basketball whilr recruiting for the team...and of course the one Buddy has his eye on is the one white kid lmao I canât
âIâm not football stupid.â Lol good one.
âWorst instincts of american cultureâviolence, aggression.â Okay sexy! whatâs your name white kid with moves?
âYouâre in Texas now. You love the game of football. You just dont know it yet.â LOL
Aww Tami talking about how this girl Epyck all the other teachers hate has never been properly cared for to succeed is exactly why a guidance counselor like her needs to be in East Dillon. but yeah sheâs bout to learn REAL fast what lack of funding and institutional racism look like! Eric is right about her not being the big cheese anymore and being able to change everything at once.
âYes Iâm stealing a basketball player but Iâm doing it one step at a time.â Lmao
AWWWW Eric saying âIâm gonna miss thisâ quietly while eating with his family bc Julieâs about to go to college!! My heart.
âOh boy oh boyâ â literally me, physically tensing up, when Billy tried to give his little inspirational speech to the football team toooooo much he is so cringe. OMFG he read âif you can believe it you might achieve itâ off a piece of paper from his pocket and attributed it i literally cannot
âThe hippie? What for?â Lol that basketball player is considered a hippie in Dillon? Hilarious. The south is wild.
âThese kids are being forgotten.â âTami, itâs a matter of resources.â âIâm your resource!â Yes Tami but you alone cannot fix dozens of kids who are products of being in a system with lack of resources since before they even started elementary school.
Damn big Mary is out franchising and being corporate dad while Jess watches his children?? Not cool.
âSo who is this guy?â âHeâs not the punter, you wouldnât be interested.â LMAO VINCE GOOD ONE
Aww Landry came to say goodbye to Mrs. Saracen. Aw heâs going to Rice? Thatâs a good school.
OMFG Mrs. Saracen has Landryâs music in her MP3 player???? My fucking heart đĽş
Grace is soooo cute holy shit
Oh wow does Crucifictorious or whatever have fans singing along? Itâs really nice that Julie went out of her way to go.
Are we contrasting this with an East Dillon farm party? Ew so drunkenly kissing farm animals is what these kids do for fun huh
âI like knowing that I can do whatever I want. Iâm a free spirit.â LMAO I hate this guy
âIâm gonna miss this.â âMiss Dillon?â âNo Iâm gonna miss the Alamo freeze and all their cool treats and hot eats.â LMAOOOO Landry
Omg theyâre reminiscing about Matt working at the Alamo freeze. âI miss his little white hat.â L O L
Lol Landry and Julie say their final goodbye in the strip club, nice. âIâll see you at Christmas.â
Omg Eric searching through their boxes for ping pong paddles so he can play a final game with Julie has my whole heart. Omfg and they found her Girl Scout vest.
Awww theyâre playing in the garage, the season 1 vibes, oh my heart.
Oh so is the basketball coach mad about Hastings playing football? Wild culture truly.
(In the end, a teenage boy canât help but answer the siren call of other teenage boys chanting his name)
Oh poor Andre acting out about their parental neglect at the Classic. Too real but babe itâs not Jessâs fault đ
Go Tinker!!!
Hastings knowing some strategic info about another team from basketball, very interesting touch.
Wow Hastings somehow doing well without knowing what heâs doing or seemingly understanding football is hilarious.
âLions win, lions win! Oh, the humanity! Alarm bells are going off all over Texas right now!â
Oh wow itâs happeninggggg
Ewww Becky really has an evil stepmom like Jesus can she have any positive parental figures
Jess and Vince are cute af. Vince helping Andre out đĽş
Honestly yeah I donât blame Becky for wanting to leave that emotionally abusive household. The found family code in this town is so well established by now. like, Billy is obligated to take Becky in bc Tim considers her family and Iâm like, yep!
Ohhh the Taylors sending their first kid off to college, emotional!!!
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Team StametsÂ
Finally! A proper group shot, to feature some of the uncredited regulars of the Disco family. Hopefully this is only the first of few more to come.
Havenât done a âcast postâ like this in a while, but here goes:
(Though, before the cut I also need to make the customary mentions of this work on instagram, on twitter, and that the Disco works are all listed here).
I am so ecstatic to finally have gotten this done! I've been attempting to do group shots of the various Disco teams for the couple past years now (as some may recall me lamenting on several occasions). Poster type, posed things, which always failed at unnecessarily intricate planning stages (trying to figure out who to include, how to group them, and not wanting to leave anyone out), or couple times having already started drawing, to my attention just wandering off to more interesting scenes, away from illustrating just frigid poses.
This half-staged looking approach seems like it was the way to tricking my brain into sticking through with it. This looks it could very well be a paused scene in-universe; the (available) team gathering for a group shot mid workday, for some introductory organization PR clip or some such (though, Paulâs looking rather unnaturally mellow here for any Fleet propaganda nonsense *ha*).
This duo continues to have a special place in my heart. LtJG Harrington, played by Devon MacDonald, was introduced in ep3 of the first season, and was the first one of Team Stamets to âwelcomeâ Burnham to the Engineering in Paulâs absence. They were also the one who found Paul by the escape pods after the poor fellow had discovered and wandered off with dead Hugh later in the season (scene, which btw reeked of unresolved possibilities). Unfortunately we havenât seen them after that (please, bring them back! ...if Devon is still up to play them, that is).
Chris OâBray. This fellow should get so much more recognition! Theyâve played several roles in the series already, as a Klingon, Kelpien, Andorian, âred shirtâ... more? As well as continuously appearing as a Science officer on Team Stamets (I hear they even played opposite Anthony in season 2 in a scene of frustrated Paul, and though the interaction was ultimately cut, you can see a glimpse of it in an episode opening montage scene where the team is trying to figure out how to recover Tilly from the network). Yet, uncredited, Disco isnât even listen on their imdb-page. I keep waiting to see them to get invited to Trek cons eventually, alongside older âminor role alumniâ, having already gained such a repertoire of Trek roles.
Speaking of OâBray, they were the one whoâs mention of the name âAnnaâ introduced me to this redhead on the left, too: Anna Popowicz (thank you!). I had been keen to know their name since season 1, where they are a prominent regular at the controls of the reactor core at that top level in the engineering room. In their most prominent screenshot I thought they greatly resemble Yeoman Mears from TOS.
Often appearing at the same station is also âBuddyâ - as I had gotten to calling this jovial looking fellow in the middle here, before learning they are played by âJordanâ (name according to their instagram profile). Their most prominent on-screen appearances in season 1 include this lovely moment in ep 4 (with Paul Marion Landais, who didn't make the cut here, but was previously featured in this one), and the team briefing scene in episode 13. In season 2 they can be seen ie. standing behind Paul at Airiamâs funeral.
Then there is this Science officer on the right. They are the only one yet to wear earring with their uniform, and were thus first most recognizable to me too. Appearing several times in season one at a fairly regular spot at the controls in the Engineering. Previously featured way back in here (with Harrington), and since discovered to be played by one âNaimaâ (real, or a stage name?).
Often alongside âthe Earringsâ in season 1 is also this, as of yet unidentified character in the far background here. First appearing in ep 3 with âEarringsâ, in that first Engineering scene with Burnham and Harrington, theyâve continued to be one of the most familiar presences around the premise all the way through to season 2 too. Their most prominent appearances in season 1 include that same celebratory sweep across the team in episode 4 mentioned above with âBuddyâ, and running to the collapsed Paulâs aid in the spore reaction chamber with Saru, Tilly et co, after the mushroom man had taken upon himself to dose with the Tardigrate dna. In season 2 you can see Paul instructing them to a task in episode 13 (incidentally, while chatting with âBuddyâ).
And this I havenât asked in a while, but: if anyone recognizes them and knows to give a name, Iâd love to credit them, and perhaps find more of them to help with featuring them more in any future works too. Any hints much appreciated.
Edit: Identified as one Michelle Browne. Yaay! So awesome to finally have the name to such a stable member of the Disco crew. Thanks to OâBray, again <3
And lastly, there is also the fellow reading the PADD, an Engineering Ensign portrayed by Christian Rodriquez. Previously featured/identified here alongside both Buddy and Harrington, and in this season 2 starter piece with several other familiar faces. Oh, and in this one, too. Their most prominent scene on screen must still be their first season 1 appearance: theyâre the one on duty when Burnham sneaks into Paulâs mushroom garden.
Oh, and there are of course Nilsson and Tilly of the credited cast there too, but much like Paul, I doubt they really need any introduction.
Obligatory hands/arms appreciation shot <3
Gosh, this was rewarding. Wouldnât seem like the same ship without the recognizable crew aboard. Much kudos to the casting for keeping things consistent. Next, Bridge or Medical?
.
#star trek#star trek discovery cast#star trek discovery fanart#star trek fan art#dsc art#DSC fan art#Paul Stamets#Starfleet#USS Discovery#sylvia tilly#lt nilsson#airiam#anthony rapp#mary wiseman#sara mitich#chris o'bray#christian rodriquez#star trek cast
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158. porkyâs romance (1937)
release date: april 3rd, 1937
series: looney tunes
director: frank tashlin
starring: joe dougherty (porky), berneice hansell (petunia, babies), mel blanc (excited petunia), billy bletcher (time munches on narrator)
iâve been looking forward to reviewing this since the day i first typed my review for bosko, the talk-ink kid. so youâll have to excuse me for rambling on more than normal, iâm really passionate about this cartoon. thereâs so much to say!
first off, this cartoon means a lot to me. itâs the first one i checked out on my own accord. i caught wind of who carl stalling was and wanted to listen to a piece of his music to familiarize myself. i saw his depression era compilation of music, and included was the opening number for this cartoon, which absolutely blew me away. i looked up the cartoon and watched it and instantly fell in love. porky was fat! porky has a different voice actor! porky was INTERESTING! porky was killing himself! i had never seen anything like it, so it holds a special place in my heart. i had a vague idea of some directors, like bob clampett and chuck jones, but had no idea who the hell this âfrank tashâ guy was. but after watching it, i knew iâd love him. and i do!
secondly, this is joe doughertyâs final appearance. while mel is undoubtedly the better porky, iâve really come to appreciate joe. he gets a hard time because he had a real stutter, and one of the repeated criticisms i see is that it sounds too overdone. true as that may be, he couldnât help it, and i applaud him for working as long as he did. i mean, a little over 2 years, thatâs a decent amount of time! and he does have talent. weâve seen and heard much worse. so iâm a little sad to see him go, but excited at the same time knowing wonderful things are ahead. i love this particular era in looney tunes history, the porkyâs romance to, say, porkyâs badtime story era. thereâs this sense of newness and freshnessânew voices, new characters, new directors. you feel the change happening before your very eyes. itâs all so exciting!
iâve rambled enough, and iâm certainly going to ramble much more, so buckle up! after petunia pig rejects porkyâs marriage proposal, porky seeks a noose for comfort. when the suicide attempt goes wrong, heâs then launched into a dream sequence about their potential marriage life... and realizes marriage isnât all itâs cracked up to be.
this cartoon has a unique opening to it. before the title card itself, we are presented with âleon schlesingerâs new looney tunes star: petunia pig!â curtains draw to reveal petunia positioned in front of a microphone. yes, this is petuniaâs first appearance! she has quite an interesting history. she appears only in 3 frank tashlin cartoons, where she was depicted as a sultry, sexy foil for the bumbling, not very sexy porky. bob clampett would adopt her in 1939 and make her to be much cuter, giving her hair and a much more naĂŻve demeanor. she hardly has any cartoons at all, yet somehow managed to live on through the dell looney tunes comics and in future looney iterations.
petunia greets her audience warmly, opening with âmy public! i hope you pictured my liking--i mean, i hope you lictured my picking... i mean... i--â overcome by nerves, petunia struggles to read the script in front of her and greet the audience. this little bit was inspired by the short lived 1936-1937 radio program community sings. the offscreen announcer attempts to calm her down. âshhh, petunia. donât get excited, donât get excited...â petuniaâs furious outburst (vocals by mel blanc, of course) of âEXCITED!? WHOâS EXCITED?? IâM NOT EXCITED!!!â comes from comedian professor tommy mack, who would do the same slow routine and then the explosion with the âWHOâS EXCITED?â line. tashlinâs the woods are full of cuckoos is an entire tribute to community sing.
the curtains close on petunia, and then weâre actually greeted with the title card. an absolutely stellar rendition of âi wanna wooâ underscores the title and the opening scene. a happy porky whistles along to the music as we have a montage of him buying necessities for petunia. a diamond ring, some roses, some chocolates. what a good guy! i love the visuals in this cartoon. everything is so sleek and modern--itâs evident tashlin was enamored with the art deco style. and that song again is just beautiful--itâs why i investigated this cartoon in the first place!
porky finishes his routine as he approaches petuniaâs house, dancing up and down the stairs before ringing the doorbell. i love that face of his as he poses by the doorbell, throwing his bouquet in the air and catching them in his hand. heâs awfully full of himself.
inside, petunia approaches the door, her brat of a dog fluffnums by her side. for some reason, fluffnums was attempted to be pushed as a reoccurring character, with model sheets and drawings of him surfacing around the studio, i guess for publicity, but he only appeared in this cartoon. same goes for the iceman in i only have eyes for you (his name is sammy sparrow?) and the parrot in i wanna be a sailor. petunia opens the top portion of her door to see her visitor, and we see cocky old porky posing with his hat hilariously tipped on his face. petunia, for whatever, isnât very pleased, turning her nose and marching away, stomping her foot. âporky pig! pooh-pooh!â in the same rhythm, the dog barks the same amount of syllables, stomping its little paw. warm welcome.
a lovely, downtrodden chorus scores porky as he trudges away tearfully, wilting, pausing only to kiss petuniaâs nameplate on her house. suddenly, fluffnums looks out the window and barks for petunia. âwhat is it, fluffnums?â then, petunia spots the box of chocolates porky carries along behind his back. we then get this BEHEMOTH of a scene that displays how tasteful of a director frank tashlin is: 6.5 seconds, 157 frames, 10 cuts. petunia rushes out of her house at the speed of light and urges porky back inside her home. the scene has CLARITY--you can understand whatâs happening, unlike the rapid cutting in porky in the north woods. this scene is genius. petunia throws a dazed porky on her couch while she gorges herself on the chocolates, cooing about how glad she is to see him.
mark kausler identifies the animator as volney white (though the thick eyebrows make me think of bob bentley. markâs a wonderful source of information i gladly accept everything he says, because heâs right 99.9% of the time) for the scene where porky tries to reach for a chocolate himself. fluffnums, ever the threatening guard dog, growls. we have a great back and forth scene as porky sheepishly pets the dog on the head, reaching for a chocolate and still getting growled at. the charade continues until porky finally snatches one, sticking his tongue out in childish defiance at the dog. as porky lifts up his trophy, winking towards the audience at his act of outsmarting, the dog jumps up and eats the chocolate himself, breaking a hole in porkyâs boater hat in the process. (no dogs were harmed in the making of this cartoon!)
seeing as this is joe doughertyâs last cartoon, he doesnât speak very much at all. in this scene, the animators had porky facing AWAY from the audience so they wouldnât have to animate his lip movements. it was pretty clear that everyone was tired of working for dougherty. instead, porkyâs body jitters as he speaks. they used a technique called staggered exposure, which was mixing up a sequence of drawings to get that jittery effect (so instead of going in a sequence of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, and so forth, it would be more like 1, 3, 5, 7, 9, and so on.) âwhy petunia, i want you... you.. you to.. be in love.. that is.. um.. will you.. uh... er, uh.. may i.. that is... wonât you... will you... aw, shucks. will you marry me?â
just as porky finally manages to spit out his confession, disaster strikes. petuniaâs bastard of a dog pulls the carpet out from under porky, sending him flipping and falling in the air. because of this, petunia ridicules and laughs at him. porky is now absolutely devastated, leaving petuniaâs house for good. i love the detail of his ears and bow tie wilting. carl stallingâs music is on point in this cartoon: an underscore of âthe little things you used to doâ backs up the scene here. that song was sung at the end of the coo-coo nut grove, where the entire nightclub was flooded in tears.
the next scene is strikingly somber and surprised me greatly the first time i watched it. we iris in on porky writing a suicide note, a noose tied around his neck, tied to a tree branch. the note simply reads âdear petunia, i love you. goodbye forever -- porkyâ the camera panning out is a little janky and rough, but i digress. porky wipes away his tears, pulling a photo of petunia from his pocket and giving it a kiss. with that, porky jumps.
because of his weight, the suicide attempt fails as the tree branch breaks, porky toppling to the ground and hitting his head. thus launches a dream sequence as his surroundings spin around (by unscrewing the lens of the camera, screwing it (counter)clockwise in front of the aperture), melting away to the exterior of a church. wedding bells chime victoriously. inside, petunia and porky give their vows. porky struggles, stuttering âi d-d-d.... i-d..d-â the officiator whistles (a dougherty era running gag), and porky spits out his final âdo.â
more volney white animation as the lovebirds exit the church, waving to the crowd that surrounds them. and, of course, fluffnums is there too, begrudgingly carrying petuniaâs veil in its mouth. we cut to porky and petunia happily riding in their car, a victorious JUST MARRIED banner waving in the wind, with shoes attached to strings on the bumper marching along in time to âin my merry oldsmobileâ. porkyâs license plate reads BOOB -- a good indicator of how frank tashlin felt about porky.
a lovely overhead layout of the honeymoon hotel porky and petunia stay at (with, of course, an underscore of âhoneymoon hotelâ, which was also the title of a 1934 earl duvall merrie melody). the elevator rises to the top floor in syncopation with the music. a nice silhouette shot of porky and petunia, and rather suggestive at that. they kiss, and the last we see before a fade out is porky turning off the light in the apartment.
billy bletcher voices the narrator as a triumphant fanfare blares. âTIME... MUNCHES ON!â rather disconcerting eating noises, and then we open to a very rotund petunia and fluffnums gorging themselves on chocolate. not the most flattering depiction of a woman, but the ironic âlaughingâ of the clarinets and horns playing âoh, you beautiful doll!â is a wonderful touch. i love when the scores themselves serve as jokes.Â
pan across the apartment, the score melting into another rendition of âi wanna wooâ as we see poor porky hard at work. i adore the layout of this entire scene. porky busies himself with all the odd jobs petunia has (presumably) thrown onto him, washing the clothes, ironing a dress, cooking the food, washing the dishes. he unsuccessfully attempts to balance the chaos, trying not to kill himself in the process. pay attention to how the furniture is arranged. the stove, the sink, even the ironing board, theyâre all slightly diagonal and at an angle. practical? absolutely not, no one has their furniture arranged like that, just jutting out. but in animation terms, itâs more than practical. itâs so that you can see the details clearly, so that you can see every little thing happening. the clarity of the scene would be muddied if the furniture was arranged the way it should be--you may miss details like the pan burning on the stove or the looming pile of dishes. this is some super smart staging, and the architecture is just beautiful within itself. porky struggles to keep up with the demands, but fails, burning food, clothes, etc. youâll notice that when he fails to balance a pile of dishes, the china crashing into him as he flops down on the floor, whatever heâs cooking in the pot boils over as well. everything just explodes at once.Â
meet porky pig jr, porky pig jr, porky pig jr, porky pig jr, porky pig jr, porky pig jr, porky pig jr, porky pig jr, and so on. all of the babies start screaming at the noise (bob bentley animation), and petunia puts in her two cents by yelling âporky pig! shut those kids up!â porky rocks one of the cradles back and forth, reassuring her âiâm doing the best i can, petunia dear.â petunia marches forth, wielding a rolling pin as she retorts âdonât dear me, you WORM!â with that, she beats porky relentlessly over the head with the rolling pin, all of the kids shouting âGIVE IT TO HIM, MAMA! GIVE IT TO HIM!â which is another radio show catchphrase of some sort.
finally, weâre met with reality. porky sits in a daze on the ground, petunia stroking his cheek with fluffnums at porkyâs other side. petunia puts on her best sympathy act, cooing âoh porky, iâm so so-ree! youâre my honey man. iâll marry you, darling, honey bunny boo...â while petunia showers porky in all sorts of pet names, he looks up at his suicide note, remembering his dream where petunia was an abusive slob. they had trouble with the camera movements again--when they came out of the dissolve, the camera was in the wrong position slightly, creating a double image.
this is one of my favorite endings to any looney tunes short. a terrified porky jumps up at zips away into the horizon (with that great electric guitar zoom/twang sound effect i love so much), petunia shrugging and fluffnums making a ! mark appear over his head. suddenly, porky retreats, snagging his chocolates from petunia and running for the hills. a beat... and he returns once more, only to give fluffnums a well deserved swift kick in the ass. the music score in this scene is just lovely, nice and jazzy. the timing is succinct, and i love the guitar zoom sound effect. iris out.
as you can see, i love this short, a lot. while i love the blow out, i think this is my first true favorite that weâve seen so far. itâs so dark, and i donât even like dark stuff! it just feels so different. carl stalling is in tip top shape with his music scores. every single piece is lovely, especially that beginning. the animation is fun, the expressions are great. i wish i could articulate my thoughts better, because i really just love this cartoon a lot. iâm super happy it was one of the first i had seen, because i probably wouldnât be typing these reviews had i not. frank tashlinâs cinematography is STRONG in this one. the camera cuts, the angles... this is a beautiful cartoon, inside and out. i feel bad that itâs joe doughertyâs last appearance, but understand at the same time. great things are ahead, revolutionary things! iâve warmed up to joe quite a lot. iâve found nothing in terms of what he did after his tenure as porky--wikipedia (not reliable, i know) states that he attended medical school before becoming a voice actor, so good on him! anyway, i absolutely love this cartoon and have seen it multiple, multiple, multiple, MULTIPLE times. itâs strikingly different in tone than what weâve seen and what we WILL be seeing. itâs not just your everyday frank tashlin porky cartoon. this one stands out, and i implore you to watch it.
link!
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Supernatural 15x01 rewatch
As a warning to send you on your way; this is a long post and itâs not clearly structured. Itâs a reaction and not a proper analysis/ meta. Iâd love to hear your thoughts or be pointed towards your own reactions if youâre willing to share~
Okay, here we go! All under the cut!
I am fond of the smooth transition between the âTHENâ and âNOWâ. The summary of last season was pretty short and I had somehow expected a montage spanning all seasons, but this is better.
First of all I am confronted with the slight vagueness of the issue at hand: the doors to hell have all been opened, so any soul that wants to is free to walk the earth again. So are they ghosts or are they demons? Since they possess bodies demons would be most likely, but then they wouldnât be cast out of a body by iron alone. Other ghosts we see later on - any ghost thatâs not in the cemetary trying to eat Sam and Dean and Cas - donât seem to need to possess a body. Neither are they in any way restricted to a particular place or object or bound by lore (White Woman, Bloody Mary... they both just kill whoever is available, not who they would usually go for due to the ârulesâ).
The second remarkable thing is that we get Belphegor in Jackâs place, both masking his loss but also parading it around, depending on which character he has a scene with. Belphegor, while suspicious, is also highly entertaining and even though he has no eyes he is pretty insightful. Jackâs dead and Dean comments it with âhe didnât deserve thisâ, but that is the height of emotion for Dean regaring Jackâs demise, at least in this episode. Dean wanted Jack to die but ultimately decided against it, but I assume his lack of emotion (or at least the lack of expression of those emotions) are a good indication that Deanâs anger at what Jack has done still overrides his paternal feelings and any sadness that Jack's death might cause him. He wanted him dead, now heâs dead, moving on to bigger issues.
How Dean deals with his own complicated feelings regarding Jack is one thing, but how he deals with Casâ feelings is quite another. Dean shows no compassion at all for how Cas feels about Belphegor walking around in Jackâs body. But neither does Sam, not really. They instead jump at the chance of having an ally. A demon comes, possesses Jackâs body, gives them a little speech and conveniently has all the right spells just available to himself and Dean & Sam donât even think about second guessing it? Itâs like âI need angel blood :Dâ and when Cas hesistates Sam urges him to give his blood anyway.
Also, Sam doesnât have a lot of scenes with the guy, itâs mostly Dean and Cas being shown to have very different reactions and thatâs pretty telling too considering Dean and Cas have been established to be Jackâs parents more than Sam has lately.Â
While Dean is pretty unperturbed and cracking jokes like calling Belphegor Crowley Jr. (Iâd call him Babybel but to each their own), Castiel went from anger at him possessing Jack to a heart-broken admittal that he canât even look at Belphegor, something that doesnât even seem to cross Deanâs mind as a possibility? He lets Cas go without berating him for it, so at least it gave him to think a bit and he didnât default to not letting Cas have emotions about it.
Belphegor has a reaction to the Equalizer, so I assume there might be something coming featuring that kill everything suicide gun. Belphegor probably knows more than he lets on, who knows if heâs even from our version of the Sam and Dean story, but weâll probably see. The scene showing the gun in Belphegorâs presence was there for a reason and weâre bound to see what itâll become.
Belphegor commenting on how gorgeous Dean is (and then later on how much he admires him as an artist) is just so funny to me. Kind of uncomfortable of course because it sounds like Belphegor is flirting and the dude is possessing Deanâs kid *lol* Generally, Belphegor is our big question mark of the episode. Is he who he claims to be? What is his goal exactly? Helping the Winchesters to put things back into hell seems far-fetched but not exactly impossible.Â
But, I must now comment on one of the high lights of the episode for me. Dean, Cas and Belphegor are in the impala alone. Belphegor witnesses Cas share that he cannot even look at Belphegor. Iâm pretty sure Jack made the demon news too, but Belphegor still asks about his meatsuit, which then reveals an interesting, juicy bit that warms every Destiel shipperâs heart. Dean says that Jack was âourâ kid. Now, imagine youâre Belphegor and you get that piece of information after having just witnessed a tense moment between Dean and Cas. Who is âourâ? Considering that Belphegor knows that Sam and Dean are brothers and he has seen how Cas acts around him, he inevitably must interpret âhe was our kidâ to mean Dean and Castielâs. Especially since everyone in hell seems to know that Dean and Cas are âattachedâ. Iâm just waiting for Belphegor to comment on Dean and Casâ failing marriage.
But hey, back to the plot! I wonder what the Equalizer wound does. In all honesty we donât even know for sure what the Equalizer does, because it certainly wasnât the only thing that could kill Jack. Maybe its goal was to purge Jack out of the story since he, in theory, could be a thread to the whole cardhouse structure of the multiverse that is Chuckâs AO3 profile of not beta read variations of the same story (like Metatron said, Chuck posted the first draft). When Jack was born he created rifts into different worlds - the abandoned drafts existing parallel to their own - and he had impacted other worlds, killed players from different universes (well, not that this was the first time this happened, Meta Misha anyone? Poor guy) and could destroy it all. Chuck doesnât mind losing one story. There are countless more, but having Jack mess up all of them, especially the ones Chuck likes to observe? That would suck. So if that was something the Equalizer was meant to prevent, balacing all the other universes out there, then maybe Sam now accidentally became a portal/ door to other worlds. The fact that we saw a different Sam, heard a different Dean seems to imply this.Â
Well, thatâs just speculation because it could also be that Sam, having accidentally forged a connection with Chuck due to their common wound, could simply see things - the future, different versions that Chuck is currently invested in. In any case, Iâm very excited about that, seeing different versions of Team Free Will is my jam.
And while Iâm speaking of things that are my jam? I must mention Casâ flat âYou shot meâ. So good. I always wonder why that doesnât happen more often in close ghost combat when shotguns are involved. Luckily Cas canât get hurt *lol*Â
But... why can a ghost hurt a demon and why can a ghost get a hold of Cas? These ghosts generally do weird things but I assume that might be because theyâve been to hell for a while and are on their way to become demons? But that brings us back to the question I asked initially and I guess weâll see more of that in the next episode.
And now, the other DeanCas scene. It doesnât exactly qualify as a conversation but itâs there and itâs still meaningful. Why did Dean get out of the car, why did he approach Cas, why did he ask? The way he cuts any conversation short beyond the quick affirmation that Cas isnât hurt, Dean shows that he doesnât want to talk, doesnât want to hear anything from Cas. Belphegor picks up on the rejection it is meant to be. It is kinda awkard, it is kind of cruel. Dean knows how Cas is struggling with the situation, at least when it gets to Belphegor but Dean is clever enough to know how much Cas is hurting because of Jackâs death. But Dean allows no grief, no expression of it, which I think is cruel... And itâs not necessary. Even if Dean is angry at Cas still (obviously) that doesnât mean that he gets to decide to not let Cas be sad about the death of their child. (But Dean has done that before, when Charlie died and Sam apologized to her while they gave her a hunterâs funeral, Dean decided that Sam didnât get to say anything, because he was at fault. It makes Dean seem so self-righteous, deciding who can or cannot be sad and in what shape they are allowed to express their grief.) Cas has shown in S14 and now again that he wants to talk, he wants to tackle the issue as a family. He never rejected Deanâs sadness, anger and grief - it was Sam that held him back, it was Dean who decided to cry alone in the woods even though Cas would have been there for him.
And Cas isnât even angry at Dean, which is something that I expected. I wonder if that will continue this way; with Cas having plenty of reasons to be upset with Dean, but only ever taking the rejection Dean heaps on him, accepting that Dean doesnât grant him the right to voice his own grief, without ever speaking up about it. Just... itâs unfair?
By the way, Sam continues to remove himself from the entire issue. He has very little to offer in terms of reactions to Jackâs death, he has nothing to offer in terms of comfort for Cas, presents no grief for either Cas or Dean to comment on and in turn get to show glimpses of their own struggling. And he too takes no responsibility at the current moment for the situation, no apology offered to Cas regarding his involvement in the âkill Jackâ mission... Which is disappointing as well but not super unexpected either. Maybe itâll come later, but as with Dean, Cas doesnât seem to hold any anger so far.
I did like the ending. From what some interviews stated I had expected Sam and Dean to struggle with having God as the one who wrote their entire lives a lot more. But theyâre doing fine so far...
All in all, a good episode. Throwing Belphegor into the mix created some very interesting situations and having him there means that he - as an outsider - gets to poke at things that interests us too, like the focus on the Dean - Cas drama. He comments on it for us, gets Cas to speak up in ways he probably wouldnât if there was only Jackâs corpse around. So Iâm pleased. :D
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ThunderCats Roar -Â âThe Legend of Boggy Benâ
Co-Executive Producer: Victor Courtright
Supervising Producer: Nate Cash
Producer: Marly Halpern-Graser
Written by: Victor Courtright
Directed by: Victor Courtright
It sure is "boggy".
So, the first episode of Roar was essentially a re-adaptation of the first few episodes of the original ThunderCats, with a few jokes thrown in there. It was actually kind of entertaining. How does this episode start?
Cookie-O-Clock!
With some of that good ol' fashioned choir text humor! Okay, there's a little bit of build up to that. Lion-O decided this hour was the hour to open up an old jar of Thunder Snaps from his home planet, and everyone is excited. See, it's a little bit more high stakes than one might expect, since they couldn't exactly order another jar from Thundara, since, well, everyone knows at this point.
Unfortunately for all of these Thunder Snap lovers, Lion-O can't seem to get the jar open. Tygra offers to help, but Lion-O believes a leader shouldn't ask for help. Tygra responds to this lack of wanting to call for help by saying that he means he should use the âcall for helpâ function on the Sword of Omens. Just like in the last episode, he decides to let the sword help by using it opener of cans and/or jars, which was apparently wrong. What was Tygra even meaning with that piece of help, anyway? The ThunderCats are all already here, so doing a "ThunderCats Hooo!" isn't going to do anything.
I want to give this episode some credit for that particular joke: while trying to open the jar with the Sword of Omens, the Sword of Omens seemingly leaps out of Lion-O's hand and lands right into the carpet. The Sword of Omens can disobey Lion-O in the original, as seen in the last episode I reviewed where it did the same action when Lion-O tried to use it for hunting, and it's fitting that it wouldn't obey him here, either. Whether this cookie jar was just that much powerful, or the act of using a sword on cookie jars is considered an evil act is never really touched upon.
Cheetara offers a better idea for Lion-O that isn't "just let Panthro take off the lid with his super strength": she knows of a magical elixir that can give Lion-O enough strength to open any cookie jar. The only problem is that it's in the soppy swamps of Boggy Ben, a powerful swamp monster that only exists in legends. Only she knows where it is, so Lion-O lets her join him in the magical quest...
...as he sings a powerful rock ballad about how he doesn't need anybody's help on his mission. It's essentially a montage of him talking about how mighty he is. He would sing about how he can lift rocks, he would be seen right next to a huge rock, and the camera pans out to show him pushing over a much, much smaller rock right next to it. The joke is that Lion-O is childish and weak.
To prove even more how unqualified he is, he keeps singing until he ends up falling right into the swamp. After seeing a cute frog that tells him he's going to croak out here, because that joke wasn't telegraphed from a mile away, Lion-O comes to the obvious conclusion:
Lion-O: This swamp is spookyyyyy!
Somehow, saying that makes the TV Y7 FV rating appear with a giant flash, complete with a clang sound effect. Honestly, it took me a few times to realize what was going on; I thought my video glitched. This doesn't become a running joke, and I don't even get what this joke would have been. Was Lion-O going to say a bunch of expletives about how he was in this bog, and the TV Y7 FV prevents him from saying it? Honestly, I'll just chalk it up to it actually being a glitch. He then falls into the bog again, with the animation degrading to Atari 2600 levels.
No, the animators didn't give up, this is actually a transition to WilyKit and WilyKat playing an old video game on their Snarf video game system. Apparently, an old bad video game that seems to star Lion-O. Maybe they're playing their own C64 adaptation.
WilyKit: This game was in fact, the toots.
Jaga said "oh, Thunder-Toots" when he had to introduce the mutants from Plun-Darr, and I am glad to know that's going to be a saying throughout this whole thing. Cyborg had "boo-yah", this show has "toots". Seeing their boredom with the video game, Panthro tells the ThunderKittens that he's working on a super sweet secret weapon for the Thundertank that he hypes up a lot, and he needs their help. While they don't want to do help, a curiosity fail gets them to help anyway. We know this because of giant text saying
CURIOSITY FAIL!
because the viewers can't see what's going on unless someone screamed it at them. This show is really reminding me of a reboot, and I'm not thinking of a Disney one.
Meanwhile, after leaping across several rocks, giant skulls, and muck, Lion-O and Cheetara end up at the lair of Boggy Ben. Lion-O walks in only to find Cheetara in a cage. Did Boggy Ben lock her in there? Not even she seems to know. Suddenly, Boggy Ben shows up, and Cheetara tells him to raise the Sword of Omens.
As is the case for Lion-O, he knows exactly what to do with that sword. He raises it, and slices Boggy Ben's head off. Since this is a TV Y7-FV cartoon, which apparently this cartoon really wanted us to know in the middle of the episode with that weird gag from before, anyone can guess that something is off.
Apparently, that anyone even includes Lion-O himself, who knew that it was just Tygra in a costume. Cheetara and Tygra admit that the whole thing was a sham to get Lion-O to use the Sword of Omens properly, and accept that maybe letting people help him is a good thing.
Lion-O looks down and takes all of this to heart that his friends are filthy liars, possibly literally filthy due to all of that swamp water. To be honest, I was barely listening to this scene, because my mind was going, "he's going to ask if Boggy Ben is fake, who's that guy, he's going to ask if Boggy Ben is fake, who's that guy, he's going to ask if Boggy Ben is fake, who's that guy..."
Lion-O: So if Boggy Ben isn't real, who the toots is that guy?!
Gee, my surprise cup runneth over! That's because I have never watched a cartoon in my life, except for every one of them! This comes as a shock to everyone involved, as Cheetara seemed to think this swamp lair was uninhabited by anyone and that the mythical house dweller was just a legend. Turns out, the only legend that isn't real is the cookie jar opening elixir.
Lion-O: Toots.
Believe it or not, there's no actual fart jokes; it's possible they felt the amount of "toots" in this episode was enough. I am referring to both the amount of times they say the word "toots" and the brain-toots of this episode. Left with no choice, Lion-O, Tygra, and Cheetara have to face off against this monster, and...
...I'm not going to lie, it's actually a pretty decent fight scene. No joke! As much flack as I've given this episode so far, this is a pretty big saving grace for the episode. There's bits of great animation here and there, like one scene where Lion-O rides on a piece of the ceiling to try to bop him on the head with that sword. They still add bits of comedy here and there, with Tygra getting played with like a yo-yo, and the monster using just one of his hands to sword-fight with Lion-O, using his nails like swords. This isn't bad at all; there's a lot of creativity here that doesn't really show up in the rest of the episode, and the only problem is that the pacing can get hectic.
Then I have to think about all of this: what did Boggy Ben do to deserve this? This whole thing was supposed to be a ruse to get Lion-O to learn the value of teamwork, as constantly throughout this episode, they tell him to call for help. Looking at it from Boggy Ben's point of view, though, he just came home and found people in his house. Sure, attempting to kill them may not be the greatest thing to do, but it's not like the ThunderCats were really in the right, anyway!
Despite their combined efforts, they're not successful. They need more ThunderCats in the action. It would be here where Lion-O would do the classic "I'm sorry I'm such a jerk scene", but he instead decides to accept his and his friend's death. Cheetara eventually talks some sense into him, and, for the first time in the series, Lion-O finally does the "ThunderCats Hooo!", making the sword shine that symbol.
I like how we get to see that Cat Signal burst through the ceiling, as if the symbol was like a giant laser beam. If it can project itself onto nothing, it might as well be able to do that! Panthro, the ThunderKittens, and Snarf see this symbol, making their eyes glow yellow. This comes just in time, as Panthro was finished with that much bally-hooed secret weapon!
This episode still does what it was set out to do, as with the teamwork of all the ThunderCats, they manage to do a lot more against Boggy Ben. Tygra tries to do another bola attack, only to be caught in the same paddleball trap from before. Panthro jumps up to take Tygra's place, using the spikes on his outfit to bruise his knuckles. Snarf, the now robotic cat thing that can't talk gets in on the action too, using Ben's now bola whipped up hand to make him punch himself.
After the ThunderKittens use their trademark smoke bombs on his eyes, giving me a screenshot that makes the show look a lot gorier than it's supposed to be, it all ends with Lion-O doing a finishing blow...by literally blowing him away. It is supposed to be a comedy-take on an 80's cartoon, and that is a joke I actually didn't expect them to do. That was something that was needed in this episode.
Also needed in this episode is a conclusion to the cookie plot, as much as the cookie plot felt kind of tacked on. We get one with Lion-O accidentally dropping the cookie jar, breaking it and all of its contents. Is all hope lost? Well, just guess what Panthro's secret weapon was. Here's a hint: it makes everything all better. Lion-O falls into the bog again, proving that he has learned absolutely nothing, and the episode ends.
How does it stack up?
Yeah, it was a good and well animated fight scene, arguably better than any of the fight scenes in the first episode. It's too bad it didn't come with a story.
I debated on whether this should be a 1 or a 2. Even with the fight scene, there's some baggage with that. However, the fight scene does raise it a little, and it would seem odd to rate something with such a low rating when I've only seen two episodes so far. Maybe if this turns out to be the worst episode, I'll re-rate it, but as it stands, I give it 2 logos.
Next, the apparently totally adult Lion-O has to prove that he really is a kid.
â Exodus (Parts 1 & 2) đ Prank Call â
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Series One - Episode Four
The fair has arrived at Downton and with it another 47 minutes and 58 sections of madness. This was always going to be a tough episode, given that it follows the finest hour that British broadcasting has ever produced, but it does give us a real idea of what Downton Abbey viewing is going to be like from hereon in. Every plot point gets four lines or five minutes of total screen time (whichever comes first); the hint that Mrs Patmore is going blind gets a single line and there is a fleeting glimpse of Carson counting some wine. But there are some lovey arty shots of Downton and itâs grounds and it all goes a bit Ang Leeâs âfigures in the landscapeâ.Â
The poster for the Downton Village Fair advertises such delights as âFind the ladyâ and a âhelter skelterâ but itâs the âand other various other amusementsâ in fine print at the bottom that intrigues me: whatâs the betting itâs a Laser Quest? Thomas takes this as an opportunity to further string Daisy along and take shots at William along the way whilst the latter rolls out his mediocre piano playing again. Mrs Patmore tries and fails to drop the hint to Daisy that Thomas is on another bus but this falls on deaf ears. Daisy later goes on to proclaim that Thomas has âlovely teethâ and Iâd never noticed it before Daisy, but he does. Throughout the episode Thomas descends to bullying William and in doing so introduces Dark!Daisy (a tag Iâm heartbroken to see has not yet made itâs way onto AO3) and solidifies Mr Batesâ role as emotional supporter/defender as he rams Thomas up against a wall, bringing the âBody Slamâ count to two in five episodes which seems like an awfully high ratio for a show based on a very much glossed over view of the past.Â
Matthew, presumably taking a break from being Downtonâs answer to Sarah Beeny, has also come to the fair and delights us all with a rather ineffectual tossing of balls at coconuts. Mary joins him and it turns out that they both have appalling aim. Itâs a metaphor for everything and they are clearly made for each other. Later in the episode they will enjoy the worldâs longest and most deliberately framed handshake but Maryâs mind is elsewhere. Kamal has remained very firmly with me for nine years having only seen a 2D rendering of his 3D form, so I can only imagine the sorts of things running around Maryâs head. But the guilt trip continues and Iâm already at the stage of willing everybody just to chill. out. Given that all involved actually held it together on the night in question, the meltdowns now seem a bit late. Maryâs cry of âIâm a lost soul to you!â is a tad dramatic and I think we (Cora, the viewers, my dog that ran into the room thinking someone was being attacked) could live without it to be honest. There are plenty of fish in the sea Mary, and youâve just go to choose one that doesnât mind your dabbling with the vestiges of the Ottoman Empire and can adequately drive a car, in what can only be described as perfect motoring conditions, without crashing it. Â
Also at the fair is Mrs Hughes and her alter ego Elsie. When asked if he was going to the fair, Carsonâs eyebrows shot up in horror at the thought but maybe if he knew that smooth talking man of the people Joe Burns was around, he might have had a slightly different reaction. As it is, Carson doesnât go and Elise goes to a pub to learn just how very 100% totally available Joe Burns is. Elsie receives a rather roundabout proposal before Joe demonstrates that he is yet another Downton character with appalling hand/eye co-ordination. However he perseveres and his victory at the ring toss is declared in a truly weird voice by an out of shot character (Seriously, watch it back: itâs haunting). Upon her return to life as Mrs Hughes, Thomas remarks that she was looking âsparkly eyedâ and within seconds, Bates is there to admonish him. That man can move fast when he needs to. Later in the butlerâs pantry, Mrs Hughes and Carson have a heart-to-heart with Carson looking steadily more uncomfortable whilst Mrs Hughes fondles a scarecrow. As the only montage that I can remember in Downtonâs history shows, Mrs Hughes turned down Joe and Chelsie fans everywhere breath a sigh of relief.Â
Whilst Matthew may be making his mark in the Abbey, his mother is not one to be outdone. Molseleyâs hands have done something bizarre and in the twentieth century version of googling an innocuous cough to find that you have cancer, Cousin Isobel almost immediately hands him the diagnosis of erysipelas that requires some convoluted treatment that Molseley neither wants, or as it turns out, needs. Violet quickly brings the medical scores to a draw with Isobel as she makes up for the early dropsy debacle by correctly diagnosing Molseley with a Rue allergy. Clarkson, you can tell, is holding back the urge to do a little dance.Â
The arrival of Branson and the entire geopolitical and cultural struggles of the Irish people creates a stir both upstairs and down. On day one heâs got his eye on the Earlâs library (although I canât imagine that Robert has all three volumes of Das Kapital) and by day two, heâs eating in the wrong place and taking digs at the charitable efforts of the Abbey. But little does anyone know that King Julian has big plans for Branson and the smile that he gives as Sybil talks about womenâs rights is very much the thin end of the wedge. Branson says that he is âquite politicalâ before handing Sybil some pamphlets that he has collected about the vote. I do love Branson but he is the sort of person that I can totally see mansplaining things on Twitter. By the end of the episode itâs already escalated to Branson looking slightly creepily through a window as Sybil cosplays as Jasmine whilst the upper echelons of society look on mystified.Â
Romantic declaration of the momentÂ
Iâm giving this section over to Anna and her cold. Mr Bates appearing with a tray was rather lovely but does pose some questions:Â
How did he go up all those stairs balancing both the tray, his presumably still quite mangled leg, the cane and the rest of his person?Â
Did he go out in the dark with a pair of secateurs and cut those flowers?Â
My only answer to those two questions is that fellow romantic Branson must have helped him: headcannon accepted.Â
Expressive eyebrow of the weekÂ
This award goes to the Earl this week for his reaction to Carson declaring that he would rather be put to death than work in a tea shop. The typically repressed English upper class âquite soâ that escapes Robertâs lips is followed by a look of bemused alarm. If he were Fleabag, this is when he would have broken the fourth wall.Â
Runners up prize goes to everyoneâs face at The Trousersâ˘Â and Violet v. The Swivel Chair.Â
Wait, what?Â
âOne canât go to pieces at the death of every foreigner, weâd all be in a state of collapse whenever we opened a newspaperâ Yet more evidence that Violet is the love child of Nigel Farage and Ann Widdecombe.Â
âI have to go cap in hand to Mary Queen of Scots!â Lesley Nicol is having far too much fun playing Beryl.Â
âIt seems unlikely, a revolutionary chauffeurâ Is Sybil aware of what period drama she is in?
âIf you donât change, you dieâ Or you do change, Matthew, and you die anyway.
âI wonât always be a chauffeurâ is stated with some confidence which seems odd given the fact that when Branson stops being a chauffeur, he hates it and will indicate at any given moment this to the nearest available character.
âI took a lover with no thought of marriage. A Turk! Think of that!â I do Mary. Quite regularly.
Iâm doing this rewatch on quite a fancy TV and as such Iâm being afforded all sorts of visual delights that the resolution on my 2010 screen failed to yield. Perhaps the most troubling of these is that Thomas is going slightly grey at the sideburns. I would insert some pun about using âJust for Menâ here but Iâll leave you all to make up one yourselves.Â
âIf sheâs got a boyfriend, Iâm a giraffeâ This seems like an analogy lost somewhere in translation. It has smacks of Gino D'Acampoâs grandmother.Â
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#Downton#downton abbey#downton rewatch#Downton movie#downton abbey movie#dan stevens#Matthew Crawley#Mary Crawley#Isobel Crawley#thomas barrow#thomas branson#sybil branson#Charles Carson#elsie hughes#john bates#Joseph Molseley#allen leech#rob james collier
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Little Women (2019): Thoughts
REQUIRED READING: the prequel post about my background going in to this film.
SNAPSHOT VERSION: Though I have some casting qualms, and may adjust my opinions after I reread the book, mostly I think this is everything my heart has needed since the magic of the â94 movie was broken for me. My heart is very full.
FULL VERSION: Twice as long as the prequel post (a.k.a. 1800 words), starts below.
I did not expect LW to be the first Unexpected Comeback Fandom of 2020 (or a comeback fandom ever, really), but here I am, having spent every day since I saw this film mooning about this story and looking up different editions and supplemental books in the library catalog, so I'd better process how I feel about it while the memories are relatively fresh.
Most of my thoughts are on casting rather than specific scenes because like I said, I canât remember the book super well, so Iâd like to get my movie memories to fade so that the book can surprise me. Also because I think I will have a more in-depth post about them when I watch the film a 2nd time, whether thatâs in theaters or on DVD. But hereâs what Iâve got for now.
ON CASTING
In no particular order --
* Emma Watson is very pretty but it is so hard to take her seriously as an actress. She's just Emma Watson, Famous For Being In Harry Potter and Getting Hired For Other Big Name Projects. I feel like she's so consciously acting all the time. She made a not-terrible Meg, I guess? No worse than she made a Belle. But it was roughly as hilarious watching her try to be a mother now as it was watching her try to be a mother in the last Harry Potter movie. To the point that I just kept hearing the "Damn! I'm SO maternal!" song playing as her theme in the background at all times. * I realized 6 days prior to seeing the movie that Florence Pugh is recognizable because she's in Midsommar and honestly, that just ruined everything for me. I didn't even see that film, I just know it's gross and I would hate it and while she is not tainted forever like the 50 Shades actors, she is definitely too tainted for Little Women. Also I could not stop thinking about how I associate Amy with being very dainty and prim and Florence, while perfectly lovely, is not. * Laura Dern was kind of strangely modern and kooky for Marmee, but I love her as an actress and I loved that she was just like "HELLO STRANGE NEIGHBOR BOY, COME BE MY FIFTH CHILD." So I was OK with that. * ARE YOU KIDDING ME WITH BOB ODENKIRK. What kind of anachronistic garbage. What crack were you on, because it was obviously not the good stuff. "Did I stumble into an SNL parody??" I wondered more than once. * Meryl Streep as Aunt March was AMAZING. Ten Oscars. * Beth consistently looked younger than Amy, so that was weird. She was okay but kind of childlike, and failed to make Beth my favorite like she is in the book. * JO! Saoirse Ronan is by far my favorite actress in this set, but I didn't think she was right for Jo going in. "Jo's not a redhead!" I said, indignantly stamping my foot, because my childhood-era love for this novel reigns defensively supreme like for no other classic besides Black Beauty. (another 1994 classic they should remake soon, even though I love that version. Just saying.)
But damned if she did not COMPLETELY embody every essence of Jo there is and make Jo my favorite character this time. Truly, nobody except Meryl Streep so thoroughly matched my expectations for their character. Ten Oscars, part II. Or at least the one she is actually nominated for. If Jo loses to ScarJo I will riot. * John was nice. I feel like he was exactly what he was supposed to be, which is to say kind of plain and milquetoast but perfect for Meg. I don't actually remember him existing in the novel, so that was an interesting game of "how important is this guy?" until suddenly Meg was getting married and I realized I did, in fact, have a very dim memory of a wedding from the book. I think I will like their romance more the second time around, though. * Mr. Laurence was VERY EXCELLENT. IDK why I know the actor, even after looking him up, but I liked him in this role a lot. His grandfatherly quasi-adoption of Beth was so sweet. * As for Professor Bhaer...UGH. I hated him on sight and my brain wouldn't even let me recognize who he was for like 3 scenes, I was just like, "who is this random boarding lodger and why are we focusing on that weirdo." I mean, he's objectively handsome? But he did not do it for me. He lacked the gravitas I expect from this character and his thick accent scraped my ears and drove me insane (update from the future: his accent is also driving me insane in the book, where I have peeked in at a few chapters as incentive to reread. whyyyyyyy). * LAURIE: maybe it's been too long since I read the book, but never could I ever have imagined I'd want to use the term "fuckboy" to describe Laurie. It wasn't even Ski Chalet's face so much as it was that in all present-day scenes (post-rejection), he is such an insufferable, melodramatic, pouting trash heap that I didn't want him to marry any of them at that point. (Also YOU STILL DIDN'T MAKE ME UNDERSTAND WHY HE GOES FOR AMY, so good job.**) However, I took especial delight in paying attention to all the cuddly platonic friend cuddling he heaped on Jo growing up, in focus or in the background, and I loved it...kind of a lot? The ship radar made noise. That noise is getting louder by the day, smoothing away his faults. He may have permanently taken up residence in my mind's eye as the new Laurie. ...this is the worst. Make it cease. (**update from the future, I am peeking at the book and it looks like it's a lot easier to understand both in text and when you're inside Laurie's head. He is still clearly sulking his way through Europe, but in a way it's easier to recover from. Also, I donât have time to unpack this but as I finish the edits on this post I started 5 days ago, Iâm starting to think I could not only ship Laurie/Amy, but believe in it from the start.) ACTUAL PLOT AND FILM QUALITY
+ The shifting between past and present was very jarring right off the bat, but after that I think it worked.
+ I loved the attic play rehearsals so much
+ I am so glad Joâs shorn hair is both fleeting and as hideous as it should look, and not Pixie Cut Chic (Childhood Me wailed at that part reading the book)
+ I remember hardly anything about the book's Part II / Good Wives, so basically everything in their adult lives was news to me. Amy and Aunt March go to Europe? Jo goes to live by herself in New York? Meg marries a relative pauper? Any of this could be true to the book or just made up as an alternate idea to explore, and I would be none the wiser. That made it more fun. (NOBODY SPOIL ME ON WHAT'S TRUE)
+ It did not occur to me until just now that the part where Jo publishes her version of Little Women is not in the book (right?), but that was beautifully done.
+ The house interiors were breathtaking. It's not like I don't regularly watch period pieces, but this time there was just something about seeing an old house, like the ones I am often in for estate sales, decorated the way I always imagine seeing when I enter those homes, that kind of made me tear up. + The outside shots were pretty too + Jo made me cry with her I'm so LONELY! speech, rude. (I went into this movie thinking I was 100% on board to finally read Alcottâs sequels for their Jo/Professor content, and now I'm like 'ah damn it is gonna be the season for the Jo/Laurie AU novel, isn't it.')
+ A strike against Beth and/or the actress playing her: I did not cry about her death (in my defense I was busy crying about Jo's pain).
+ I did NOT remember precisely how Laurie & Amy got married, so even though I knew it happened eventually, I felt that sucker punch to the gut reveal just about as hard as Jo did. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOUR WIFE.
+ My mom said sheâd heard this movie was lauded as being super feminist, which rarely goes well for me, but I thought it felt like really authentic "married women literally were not allowed to control their own income and it sucked" 19th century feminism, and not someone using their 21st century voice to claim this is how people would have REALLY talked if The Patriarchy Of Historical Record hadn't silenced/suppressed it. Nothing rankled me. Iâm very confused by the people who think it says Jo is queer and/or didnât end up with the Professor, but if thatâs what you see then I guess itâs a win/win situation for all of us. + LOVED the closing montage. + Basically, at all times that I wasn't annoyed by the casting, I was feeling the same magic I did while reading the book and/or while watching the 1994 movie as a child. I canât think of any parts I really hated.
IN CONCLUSION
Part of me is honestly kind of sad I didn't reread the book before watching this movie, because even though I usually prefer to go movie first and then get the Expanded Edition that is the book, in this case I wish I'd taken my last chance to properly visualize everything in my head on my own -- since Iâve mostly forgotten the â94 film -- before the new movie washed it away forever. This is one of the rare times I would have liked to hope and guess what would be shown vs. cut, and be able to anticipate the thrill of seeing the page come to life.
However, seeing it was the impetus I needed to finally take my childhood copy off the shelf (and thank heavens I have it, because the library request is backed up 3 or 4 deep for every copy), and it took all of 5 minutes to get instantly sucked into chapter 1 and feel such rapturous joy and familiarity that I consciously cut myself off and decided I am going to journal out my feelings after each chapter on this reread. So thatâs something!
#the biggest surprise is that maybe Timothee Chalomet is not the worst thing ever#and I frankly do not know what to do with this loss of identity#little women#little women spiral
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Alex Weston Interview: Scoring the Yearâs Most Universal Film
BY JORDAN MAINZER
In Lulu Wangâs fantastic new film The Farewell (A24), a Chinese family chooses not to reveal to their matriarch that sheâs dying but want to see her before she goes. So, they do what any good family would do: stage a fake wedding. Right? As absurd as it sounds, itâs Wangâs story, the center of which is presented through the perspective of Billi (Awkwafina), an NYC-based aspiring writer befuddled by what she perceives as her familyâs dishonesty and betrayal. At the heart of the conflict are diverging modes of thought, the individualism of the West at odds with the collectivism of the East. According to Billiâs Japan-based uncle, the family, not the grandmother, Nai Nai, should bear the emotional burden of death. As such, the film is chock full of scenes of characters experiencing extreme emotion without trying to make it look like it, so as not to give away the secret theyâre keeping from Nai Nai, but often failing and having to make excuses for tears.
This same strife is rife throughout composer Alex Westonâs essential score. Based around a motif of desolate classical string compositions and eerie, high-pitched, wordless vocals, Westonâs music drives along the film as the family tries as best as they can to achieve their secrecy, adding the tension that inevitably threatens to boil over due to longstanding familial disagreements and differences in values and country of residence. At the same time, itâs moments of musical familiarity and tradition that keep the familyâs bond strong. Wangâs deft script presents these moments as key--Billi and her father singing âKilling Me Softlyâ at wedding karaoke, Italian aria âCaro Mio Benâ superimposed over the family getting wildly drunk with booze, splendor, and despair--while Westonâs arrangements supply them with the timbre and tone to allow them to maintain their importance to the filmâs impassioned journey.
I spoke to Weston over the phone last month about his approach to scoring the film, working with Wang, and curating the soundtrack. Read the interview below, edited for length and clarity.
Since I Left You: How did you become involved with the project?
Alex Weston: It was kind of a traditional pathway for something like this. They were looking at a lot of composers, and the music supervisor was giving Lulu Wang, the director, a bunch of options. Someone suggested me, and I met with Lulu to talk about the project and wrote a couple of scenes sort of as a little tryout. She decided to go with me.
SILY: Was she aware of your work before the recommendation?
AW: No, she wasnât. It was just that someone who was familiar with my work had her listen to some samples, and she was intrigued enough by the samples to want to see what Iâd do.
SILY: Do you know what specifically you had done that led to the recommendation?
AW: No, I donât know.
SILY: Had you seen the film without any music before scoring those couple scenes?
AW: I had seen the movie with the temp track on. All pre-existing music.
SILY: How did you approach the two scenes you tested the waters with? Was it your normal approach to scoring?
AW: Yeah, I donât think I approached it differently--capture the energy and the emotion. Ultimately, Lulu had in mind for the movie a very particular kind of sound and tone. Even though I got the job off of scoring those two scenes, what we ended up having in those two scenes was not at all related to what I had written [for the tryout].
SILY: How would you characterize what she had in mind?
AW: As we were starting, we had a lot of conversations about tone. We were trying to find this particular balance of emotion. The story itself is very small. Every family has experienced this--not exactly with the whole lying and fake wedding thing, but every family has experienced loss or grief and has lost a grandparent. So the stakes are incredibly small. Itâs a grandparent dying, which is what grandparents do. But for [the family in the film], the stakes are so high, the added tension of the fact that theyâre maintaining this lie. So we wanted it to feel more dramatic and heavier to play against that. Two things we wanted to incorporate to accomplish that were using classical music--capital âcâ classical music--and for it to be very vocal-heavy. A big, dramatic choir that would play against whatâs happening on screen. So she was originally planning on just hiring an arranger to do vocal arrangements of Vivaldi and stuff, and that would be the score. Ultimately, we decided to make something that was unique for the film that we could build and expand on rather than try to shoehorn in something pre-existing.
SILY: On the soundtrack, there are three tracks credited to someone else. Can you tell me a little about each?
AW: The first one on there is a cover of Leonard Cohenâs âCome Healingâ. Lulu had the idea to use that song in the movie from the get-go. But it did feel kind of ridiculous for this female-centric movie to suddenly have gravely Leonard Cohen. It didnât fit; it was jarring. We wanted a cover that was more vocal-heavy and string-heavy to fit with the score, and a female vocalist. We ended up finding this cover by Elayna Boynton, who is a phenomenal gospel singer based out of L.A. She has a bunch of really great albums on her own. Sheâs written songs for movies before; she has a credits song in Django Unchained. Lulu actually found her by just watching covers of âCome Healingâ on YouTube, and there was a video of Elayna doing it at church. In terms of the arrangement for that, I produced the recording with Elayna and did a version that matched the rest of our score.
The second song, âCaro Mio Benâ, is a pretty famous aria. Thereâs a scene in the wedding where family members are going up and singing songs, and thereâs karaoke at the wedding. One woman sings âCaro Mio Benâ ,and itâs juxtaposed with a slow motion montage of other things happening at the wedding: the family playing drinking games, the groom getting wasted and breaking down into tears, stuff like that. Itâs a very funny juxtaposition over the anarchy of whatâs going on. We recorded it with a wonderful opera singer and her accompanist, but Lulu wanted something different with the accompaniment. She used to play piano, so she ended up going to the studio and recording the piano part herself. I think itâs kind of cool she ended up performing on the soundtrack itself.
The last one was added after my involvement. That plays during the credits. Similarly, because of the sense of community that the voices provide, and the karaoke, it starts with an Italian cover of Harry Nilsson[âs âWithout Youâ] and breaks down into a full karaoke version of it, which I think Lulu and 10-15 other people recorded after a shot or two of tequila. One of the music supervisors took a big passenger van up to Woodstock, where the recording studio was, and they passed out shots and sang it.
SILY: How do you go about naming the tracks?
AW: The tracks were named afterwards, of course. When I was working on them, they were more functionally named: âM1âł, âM2âł, âM3âł, that kind of think. Before the album, me and Lulu just had a phone call debating what would work, what would flow nicely.
SILY: Sometimes, itâs something thematic, sometimes, itâs âthis piece of music takes place during this specific scene where this happens.â
AW: There was a fair amount of that. The first track, âThe Lieâ, is the first scene where they decide theyâre going to lie to their grandma. âFamilyâ is slow-motion the whole family walking together. Most of the time, it was fairly literal.
SILY: To what extent does this score function as a separate piece from the film?
AW: There are a couple cues on the soundtrack that are variations of what appear in the film, but it didnât make sense to have two 45-second things on an album that were practically identical. So I kind of combined them and worked out a transition between the two to make a piece that someone could listen to. An example of that would be track 3, âChangchungâ, where there are two distinct halves but similar material. We spent a lot of time working on the sequencing, making sure it felt like an album, not standalone tracks. I think thereâs even one cue on there that ended up getting cut from the movie, but we liked the music, so we put it back on the album!
SILY: What other projects do you have coming up?
AW: I have a few films that are starting now. Iâm working on another solo instrumental record. But at this point, I just hope people decide to go out and see The Farewell!
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like yesterday, here's a bullet list of my thoughts for episodes 18~21
thoughts on episode 18:
oh no, it's the beach episode.
-- i really like how they show the way the PT take care of futaba. ren patiently cleaning up her room in between hours at the florist, them playing vidya with her, or just having lunch together in montage moments is very sweet. it makes me wish the anime had much slower pacing, more slice of life-y kind of drama.
-- watching yusuke, ryuji, and futaba lose their freakin minds over good curry is VERY relatable.
-- i still don't understand why ann and makoto thought that a two piece frilly bathing suit was the way to go with futaba. a one piece that she could wear under a long wrap or a hoodie would've made so much more sense... but >male gaze
-- have i told y'all how fucking tired i am of the sexualization of the teenage girls in p5 yet, and how it is one of the several things that fuckin ruined this game for me
have i?
well here it is again
none of the previous games were as bad as this b t w and p4 had one of the dungeons be a STRIP CLUB.
-- yusuke and his lobsters are wonderful.
-- oh god i forgot COMPLETELY about the whole 'mental shutdowns' thing in this game's plot. i think because it's all so pointlessly convoluted. p3 had something similar but even there it was just people turned catatonic for weeks on end when the monthly boss-shadows drew near.
i think the reason i find this so hard to understand is because from p3 to p4 the rules of shadows didn't really change so much. p3 had the persona users go up against shadow bosses; p4 had people confront the shadows within themselves, either accepting them completely (which then turned into persona), or the shadow 'absorbed' the person and ran rampant as a monster. neither of those rules really contradict each other, but in p5 personal shadows for persona users are gone completely, and how you deal with other people's personal shadows doesn't even involve them being present to complete the merge.
mona says that persona users can't have palaces, but persona users in 4 could and DID have 'dungeons' within the shadows' worlds. these dungeons dealt specifically with what was at the core of the shadows' emergence--a deep secret and a hidden truth that caused the shadow to grow, a place that was a replica and a distortion of reality based upon that suppressed truth. so that sure sounds like a fucking palace to me.
so....................... unless there's like, multiple realities folded into our own, and persona users can only access certain ones.................. i'm just super confused.
like, i know it's because the rules change game to game, but p3 to p4 didn't have any contradictions, and p2 didn't contradict anything in p3, either. it just went from a full party of wild card users to a singular one.
-- i'm glad ann's getting a little screentime here. i was just thinking about how other characters' development was lacking after makoto and futaba got so much focus.
-- mona's so sweet to ann ;-; now that he has a human form in p5r, i hope they become really good friends. she needs a kind guy friend that'll be reliable~ plus he makes her laugh.
-- sojiro talking about the anniversary of wakaba's death is......... really interesting........ considering that screenshot of futaba sitting next to a woman with the exact same haircut as her "deceased" mother.
-- ren reassuring mona that he absolutely has to be human, that he will return to who he used to be once they figure out what's happening in the metaverse is jsut jdfklasd
AND HIS LIL ROUND OF APPLAUSE WHEN MONA TALKS ABOUT ALL THE THINGS HE'S GOING TO DO TO KEEP THE WORLD SAFE ;-;
AND THAT SHOT OF HIM SLEEPING CURLED UP ON REN'S STOMACH
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
-- listen i know mona isn't rly a cat but he's the BEST cat
thoughts on episode 19:
oh it's the hawaii episode.
-- man what the hell kinda budget do these school's got that they can just go overseas with dozens of students on a yearly basis? that's impressive.
-- ryuji: "whoa, awesome! ..... i don't really get it, but awesome!" fjdsafds okay that got a laugh outta me. good one, ryuji.
-- ren: "i'm excited, too." (said in a monotone) fjklsadsl BLESS THIS BOY
-- ren's FACE when he learns that futaba installed a spying app on his phone and can hear him/see pictures he takes is...... kind of hilarious. especially if you have the headcanon that he and akechi send dumbass snapchats to each other a lot--which i do. and which you do now, too.
-- mona's depression is ten times more sad because he's a cat okay :c why they gotta make the cat so cute
-- ren, ryuji, and ann's lil sleepover is adorable. especially since ann chastises ryuji for not knowing one of the basic rules of a sleepover: if you start talkin' about your crushes, you gotta start with your own~ thems the rules lads
-- rip principal bloatneck.
-- honestly that truck shoulda at least TRIED to stop.
-- "A LO HA." goddammit that's adorable
AND HE GIVES THE LEI NECKLACE TO MONA FJDSKFJDSKL ren you're so SWEET.
-- I TOTALLY FORGOT THAT MONA CALLS SAE "ONEE-NO-NIIJIMA" FJADSKLFJDSKL ahhhh it's so cute.
-- the PT targeting okumura, who is essentially the dave thomas with political ambitions of the persona 5 world, is far funnier now that i phrase it like that.
-- ANN, OF ALL FUCKING PEOPLE, SAYING THAT THEY PROBABLY BROUGHT THIS RECENT TROUBLE ON THEMSELVES, IS A FUCKING STUPID WRITING DECISION. I CAN'T BELIEVE SOMEONE DIDN'T LOOK AT THAT AND GO, "ANN WOULDN'T SAY THIS. ANN HAS NO REASON TO SAY IT." god. lmao PLEASe let p5r be a goddamn second draft.
-- mona's totally right that ryuji's just concerned with getting popular and his dick wet. like,,, that's why this argument only made me hate ryuji more than i already did. he gets pissy when mona points out the truth.
god he sucks lmao
I'M SORRY I'M SO SALTY YOU GUYS
LOOK I'LL SAY SOMETHING NICE: SAE AND AKECHI ARE COOL
-- i really like how guarded akechi's face looks in his conversation with sae, and how off his guard he looks when she tells him that she's not going to hold back, especially since the culprit is doing such dire, awful things. he's not exactly surprised, but he's definitely uneasy and shaken by what he hears. which makes me wonder who heâs really concerned for--himself, or for ren (and the PT by extension, but akechi only really seems to care about ren, so).
the reason i like that is because the okumura arc in p5 is really where akechi's mind starts its downward spiral. principal kobayakawa's death obviously rattled him, especially since the only reason the principal died was because shido saw him as useless and disposable, something akechi is desperate NEVER TO BE. and it's that + what happens with okumura that really kicks him over the edge.
i hope p5r will give us the chance to pull him back from it. he deserves a better chance than the game's subpar writing gave to him.
thoughts on episode 20:
-- ren wakes up in a panic because he thinks he sees mona on his bed ;___________;
-- goro snoopin' on the PT's LOUD, TOTALLY CONSPICUOUS conversation in front of okumura foods' HQ is kind of adorable if you remember he clearly loves star wars (HE HAS A LIGHT SABER), and the camera cuts to his face right as they're talking about big bang and outer space lingo.
-- oh, haru. i really wish you were the black mask. that would've been so much cooler--and an actual twist. her total hopeless panic about being a beauty thief could still be a thing (because it is actually endearing), it'd just be an act. but that's me talkin' fix-its again.
-- i really like the scene of haru defending mona to the PT on the rooftop, then cutting to show just how strained her relationship is with her father. she exists to be useful to her father's ambitions and nothing else, and that scene really drove home just how painful that is for her.
-- REN TWIRLS HIS HAIR BETWEEN TWO FINGERS WHEN HE'S DEEP IN THOUGHT. AHHHHHHH I FORGOT HE DID THAT
-- oh hey remember how the game went through the trouble of showing how haru's fiance is a sexist, violent, animal-hurting piece of shit and then promptly failed to actually separate her from him in game (i think you only can do that in her s-link?? the s-link you can barely finish in your first run of the game??), and in t hEN SHOWED HER IN THE CAR WITH HIM LATER, LOOKING HORRIBLY UNCOMFORTABLE?
god this story makes me so fucking mad lmfao STOP PUTTING GIRLS IN PHYSICALLY OR SEXUALLY VIOLENT PERIL AND NEVER ACTUALLY ENSURING THAT THEY'RE SAFE, YOU DAVID CAGE LEVEL OF HACK BULLSHIT WRITERS.
-- ryuji running into the attic, all worried about mona, with a first aid kit, is..... very good. very good and endearing. good on you, ryuji.
-- haru gently encouraging mona to tell the truth is also really good. idk if i just missed it in the game or what, but i really like how she's presented in the anime. she's like a counterpart to ren--soft, sincere, observant, patient, yet she's made of pure steel beneath all that.
thoughts on episode 21:
-- WHY WAS HARU'S GRANDFATHER GIVING COFFEE TO A FIVE YEAR OLD
-- haru, the reason your father's heart grew twisted is thanks to capitalism. you gotta change the heart of capitalism.
-- not to be all poochie here but whenever akechi isn't on screen, all i can ask myself is whERE'S AKECHI?
-- HOW CAN I TAKE THE EVIL DAVE THOMAS SERIOUSLY WHEN HE'S DRESSED LIKE FUCKIN MEGAMIND?
-- okay see this is where i'm thrown completely out of the story or even really liking haru. haru just listened to her dad's shadow saying he would PIMP HER OUT TO HER FIANCE WITHOUT A SECOND THOUGHT. and she still is just like ~no i want him to go back to being kind~
bitch are you nuts
are you NUTS
youR DAd SHOULD DIE AND YOU'D BE BETTER OFF
CONSIDERING HOW THE GAME GOES, YOU ARe BETTER OFF
god. i'm getting so mad again lmao
-- ren approaching haru to point out that if the truth of her father's crimes comes to light, she'll forever be associated with him (and with all the harm and ruined reputation that brings) is, once again, further reminder of just how... damn good ren is. he doesn't hesitate to speak from the heart nor does he ever fail to listen to someone else speak from theirs.
-- also not for nothing but uh
how did the cops not like
figure out how the PT phan-site was set up within the first few months and track it down to mishima? was that ever addressed at all?
-- honestly another reason why i get so fucking mad about this okumura stuff is the game goes SO FAR OUT OF ITS WAY to make you feel BAD that he died, when he was by all rights a fucking shitheel monster, yet when akechi dies it's like 'oh well. that sucked.' fuck off, atlus. the death of a greedy, heartless CEO isn't more sad just because his gaslit daughter is conditioned to be sad about it.
i understand that a large part of the shock after okumura's death is because the PT don't know if they did anything wrong. but okumura was in no way a good person. he was in no way a person whose redemption overruled all the hurt and harm he did. that has been the case for EVERY PT target before this, so why the fuck is okumura suddenly so different? why SHOULD he be?
the difference between him and, say, akechi is that okumura et. al. all made those choices on their own to do terrible things. they delighted in it, they enjoyed it. but akechi, much like futaba, was forced into a cycle of self-destruction--itâs just that in futabaâs case, her self-destruction targeted herself, and akechiâs was quite literally weaponized and used against others. he approached shido as a young teenager and was then used by him for years.
a teenage boy being used as a magical hitman by his shitlord father is far more deserving of sympathy and redemption than grown adults who willingly make the decision to harm, abuse, and prey on others. but no, the game didnât want to do that.
this is another big problem i have with p5's second and third acts: it's so tonally dissonant and sloppy. it's like they didn't try to actually be as rebellious and hellraiser-y as the first act WANTED to be, and it all ends up being such a limp-dick shriveled mess of "let's fight against this rotten society!! ......... as long as it in no way actually upsets anyone or does any REAL change." fuck off lmao
that's not me even commenting on the "twist" and how it needed to be explained MULTIPLE TIMES to the player for it to make any sense.
and it still doesn't make sense to me btw.
so that's another thing i hope p5r fixes.
-- rip evil dave thomas megamind.
-- akechi floating the idea to sae that the phantom thieves had nothing to do with okmuraâs death is............................ interesting.
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Tell me about Paparazzi and Not One of Ours!
WIP Meme
ah the Paparazzi fic...the fic that I will one day write...definitely...absolutely (even though it still only lives in the notes on my phone...because i had this idea while i hiatus in August ;_;)
the concept (a post-season seven fic) is that somehow the paparazzi exists on Earth despite an alien invasion (heck some of the paparazzi are aliens...and Sal advertises in the tabloids), and the Paladins are instant celebrities for obvious reasons so naturally the paparazzi pry into their private lives...
(Hunk voice: Â she is not my girlfriend!!)
anyway one of them waggles their eyebrows at Pidge (so to speak) and is like so youâre surrounded by these young handsome and heroic men so surely one of them has caught your eye?? and sheâs Annoyed because sheâs been badgered with questions like this A Lot lately so she snaps (eager to get them off her back although it backfires and jokeâs on her) and name-drops Lance
everything kind of spirals downhill from there. Pidge is mortified she told the whole damn universe she has a crush on her teammate, Lance is Stunned that his teammate has a crush on him (and that he found out through a tabloid rather than from her), and Hunk and Keith face-palm the entire time
(Matt, with Pidgeâs vlog playing in the background:Â well that explains a lot)
naturally Lance confronts Pidge about it (because sheâs in Avoid Mode) because heâs kinda hurt she didnât tell him, but she lies (or well...itâs somewhat true) and says she just wanted the paparazzi to quit bugging her about her nonexistent romantic life so she used his name as a placeholder and doesnât actually like him like that
(You, me, and their mother:Â lies)
Lance is hurt (the Nile is a river in Egypt) and uh...they donât talk for a bit (or something like that) and eventually they make up when Pidge comes clean. he wonders if she wouldâve told him on her own and she admits she wouldâve kept it to herself because whatâs the point?? (heâs already kinda dating Allura by then anyway) BUT the important thing is that they are Friends again!!
cue a montage of tabloid âheadlinesâ vaguely documenting the evolution of their relationship, culminating in one accompanied by a photo (this is where i wouldâve begged an artist to collaborate with me because a Picture is worth a thousand words and i have a Very Distinct image in my head) of Pidge and Lance holding hands or kissing or some other Sweet Romantic Affection thing while they both flip off the âcameraâ
that was...basically the whole fic...but anyway
and Not One of Ours!! oh boy this one got to about 25k words before i went on hiatus and so kinda...abandoned it?? i did post the first scene as a preview, but the concept is rather dark...
basically Pidge is captured by someone who subjects her to both âpleasantâ and âunpleasantâ hallucinations in a quest for information...but also to make her miserable, really. on top of which due to Circumstances she thinks Lance is dead (donât worry, heâs not)
itâs split between flashbacks to Pidgeâs captivity and the present to her tormentorâs trial (also between Pidge and Lance PoV because...why not alternating PoV??). also as a result i got to kinda...explore other realities?? like one where the Galra invaded Earth pre-Voltron (and without Voltron i suppose) and another where the Kerberos mission was a success...and another where Matt Holt didnât recognize Pidge when she found him ;_;
i may save the concept, even if i donât continue the fic, of âcharacter experiencing wish-fulfilling hallucinations while also being Grounded to reality by some terrible fact of lifeâ because i love it so
aaaand hereâs a ~1200-word excerpt for fun:
Pidgetaps her fingertip against her thigh, counting the sentryâs patrol while she crouches in a shallowcrevice she strongly suspects is the opening of a trash disposal chute. Herbreath sits trapped in her lungs while she waits, and she releases it in a huffas the sentry passes.
Pidge sneaks out of her crevice and intothe hallway that she knows from scouting and testing the boundaries of herfreedom will lead her to the shipâsbridge - from where she can send her teammates a distress signal and bring theship down from the inside.
She creeps down the hall, wary of stickingto the blind spots of any surveillance cameras she finds and ducking intodoorways at the hint of a patrolling sentry or Galra serviceman.
ââŚrefusingto awaken.â
Pidge halts just past an open room whereshe suspects the living servicemen take mid-shift breaks. Her mind spurs heron, telling her that whatever theyârespeaking of has nothing to do with her - except to distract them from spottingher - but her heart isnâtso sure.
She backs up a step, keeping the roombehind her while staying out of sight of its occupants, to listen:
âEventhe Druids canât wake it,â a soldier tells his fellow.
âButweâre holding its Paladin hostage,â the fellow says, sounding confused.
Pidge stiffens, her eyes widening. What Paladin?
She bites the words back, keeps fromstorming into the room and demanding information - because why would they giveit to her? She has no bite to match her bark, no bayard to hold to their throatand no Lion of her own to threaten them.
But if one of her teammates was alsocaptured, she needs to find them before attempting her own escape.
âItâsjust an unfeeling machine,â the first soldier says. âWhy would its Paladinâssafety be its concern? Thatâs like threatening to kill one of us so that asentry will violate its programming.â
The other soldier snorts before dissolvinginto a full-blown guffaw. âOh,I would like to see that.â
Pidge scowls, wishing she didcarry a weapon. What do these two know anyway? Theyâd never witnessed Red lunge for Keith orBlack crouching over Shiro orâ
Grief washes over Pidge, an ache fillingher chest when she realizes how much she misses Green. How long has it beensince she felt something of her Lion inside her head?
How long has she been a prisoner?
âNotfor much longer,â Pidge swears.
She detours to a nearby directory, sighingin relief when it doesnâtrequire Galra biometrics to unlock - not her first piece of luck, and itâsenough to make her wonder if this is too easy until she shakes her head andfocuses on the task at hand.
Pidge memorizes the shipâs layout and the route to the shipâshangar as best as she can. She traces the route on her arm and mumbles thedirections under her breath, but before she can exit out of the directory,metallic, clanging footsteps sound behind her.
She sprints down an adjacent hallway, justin time for a small contingent of sentries that pass along with a supervisinghelmeted Galra soldier. He scowls as he marches and speaks into his comm, âWhy didnât you post more security at hercell doorthen?â
âHerâ?Pidge covers her mouth to muffle a gasp, her heart pounding even faster.
They know.
The soldier pauses to listen to some reply,and Pidge stalks him and the sentries on silent, bare feet.
âYes,sir,â the soldier says, his shoulders slumping before he straightens again. âIâmalready on my way to the cargo hold.â
Pidge stumbles on her next step, herstomach leaping, but recovers while wondering why.
If Pidge escaped, why would they send moresecurity to the cargo hold?
Unless the Lion isnât in the hangar, and they think sheâllseek it.
Pidge decides itâs time to trip an obvious trap.
She sets her jaw, her hands curling intofists, and chases the soldier and his accompanying sentries at a distance. Ifshe can just catch a glimpse of the Lion, she can ascertain which of herteammates was captured and free them.
Pidge discards her tentative plan theinstant she lays eyes on the Lion.
On her Lion.
Her jaw drops at the sight of the GreenLion cocooned within a particle barrier, at the heavy guard surrounding her, atthe Druid standing before her, its cloak billowing in some unfelt breeze.
As Pidge hides behind a crate and watches,the Druid raises their arms, and an arcing beam of violet quintessence shootsfrom their hands.
It strikes the particle barrier, the greenhexagons flashing violet as the barrier absorbs the blast. The living soldiersin the hold observe from a wary distance, turned in different directionsundoubtedly to keep watch for Pidge.
Pidge bites her lip, her thoughts occupiedwith this new dilemma. How to get to her Lion?
How to wake her up without making hervulnerable to the Druidâsattacks?
She pinches her eyes shut and reaches outto Green with her mind.
Her eyes fly open when she senses nothing.
Pidge grits her teeth and thinks, Why canât I hear you, girl?
Panic rises within her with every tick sheextends tendrils of thought towards the Lion with no response, not even a hintof a consciousness touching hers. ItâslikeâŚ
The soldiers she overheard were right, andthe Green Lion is little more than an unthinking machine.
Why have you shut me out? Pidge wonders as she swallows around a lumpin her throat.
Is it because sheâs a prisoner and her Lion needs a strongand freePaladin to pilot her?
No⌠Pidge sags as the first tears escape. Shewipes at them, failing to muffle a sob as she wraps her arms around her legsand buries her face in her knees.
No, no, no.
Itâsall wrong. Pidge knows itâsall wrong, so whyâ
Her tears still, cutting herself offmid-sob at the flicker of a memory playing through her mind. Doubt strikes her,and she glances over the crate at the Lion, frowning.
She wasnâtcaptured with the Green Lion. She and Lance took hisLion - the Red Lion, so whyâ
The crate explodes, shoving Pidge away withthe force of the small blast. Heat tears at her already tattered clothes andscalds her skin, and she gasps in shock, her heart jumping into her throat, asher shoulder collides with the floor.
Her cheeks and arms sting with a multitudeof cuts, her whole body aching from the blast and fall as she slowly sits up,rubbing her pounding head.
The Druid stands over her, a ball of purpleenergy floating over their hand.
âThesearenât real,â Pidge tells them. She touches her face, and when her fingertipscome away bloody, she feels no surprise. âNone ofâthe Green Lion shouldnât behere!â She bolts to her feet, stumbling at a wave of dizziness and when herankle nearly gives out underneath her with a spike of pain shooting up her leg,and shouts, âYou canât replicate the bond between Paladin and Lion, can you?â
#...given the opportunity i talk a Lot about my writing#rather than...actually writing apparently#qna#plance#pidgance#voltron#reem writes fic#most of my wips are plance because of course#cosmicdusttrails
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Episode Recap: 2.25, âThe Cake That Takes the Cakeâ
We find Andi and Bex looking at rings to start the episode. I know money is probably tight, I know the proposal is unconventional, I know theyâre shopping for Bowie, but why are they looking through the kind of rings youâd get out of the vending machines you put quarters into at the grocery store?
(Also, why is Bex wearing more rings than an 18th century pirate?)
Iâm surprised these rings arenât stored in plastic acorn capsules.
Andi finds a yin yang ring and they realize the message it sends about the universe and everything is the perfect one, even though the ring itself looks like it fell out of a Cracker Jack box.
They celebrate by screaming wildly in the middle of a jewelry store.
Meanwhile, Cyrus and Buffy hang out at the outside basketball courts on a snowy, freezing cold Summer Winter Spring morning.
(Why is that school bus parked in somebodyâs driveway?)
Sorry to call out an actor here, but um... Sofia is not good at basketball. Like, at all. In fairness to her, she wasnât cast to be a basketball player. Sheâs a very good actor. Thatâs her strength. Well, also dance. Sheâs also a good dancer. But thatâs neither here nor there. The point is, basketball is not her forte. (Luke is better, but not great either. When you watch the one-on-one later, pay attention to how almost any time someone looks remotely fluid performing a basketball related action, you donât see their face. Itâs... noticeable.)
I say all this just as a fan of basketball whoâs having a difficult time watching this scene. Anyway, Iâm not really blaming her as much as the director. Theyâve done a pretty good job this season of making her look good on the court, but this long, uncut shot of her dribbling and awkwardly pulling up to shoot was a poor choice.
Cyrus tries to pump Buffy up, especially because thereâs a basketball game on Friday and Cyrus wants Buffy to rejoin the team. Buffy wonât though.
Cyrus thinks itâs because of TJ. He tries to explain that TJâs a completely different person. He even got a âCâ on a math test.
(It was what now?)
Cyrus says he was like a puppy. Buffy, undeterred, says heâs still a puppy she doesnât want to play with.
Listen, Buffyâs feelings of anger towards TJ aside, âI donât want to play with that puppyâ is an inherently false statement like âI donât need oxygen to live,â or âIâm perfectly fine with being set on fire,â or âOh, you donât have Coke? Thatâs great! Pepsi was my first choice!â
Andi and Bex walk together just a couple hundred yards from where Cyrus and Buffy are.
Same bus, same house.
Seasonâs almost over. Sort of sad the last time the GHC shared the same room was when Buffy and Cyrus walked by in the background of Andi and Jonahâs date planning at Cloud 10, and their last interaction was 15 seconds of looking at each other while Jonah and Walker talked at the art show. Andi and Bex shouldâve stopped by the court to say âHiâ at least.
But they didnât. Theyâve got their own thing to do. Theyâre planning the proposal for tonight. Andi is upset theyâve already used the âhide the ring in a pizza boxâ plan. They decide to hide the ring in a cake instead. Feels like someone should tell them you can propose without hiding rings in food. In fact, most proposals arenât âhiding rings in foodâ based.
Andi decides they should drop in on Bowie at Red Rooster and invite him to dinner, real low-key and casual. Itâs such a simple plan. All they have to do is not act like a dentist just pumped them full of nitrous oxide. Thereâs no way it can fail.
Welp. Maybe they shouldâve just texted him? Bowie thinks theyâre up to something but isnât a detective, so heâs unable to piece together anything more than that.
Later, Andi and Bex put together the cake. They stuff the ring inside.
Not a fan of this at all. The pizza plan had the ring safely in a holder on top of the pizza. This is a big hazard! The only thing preventing tragedy is an easily movable toothpick. You want a surefire way to ruin a proposal? Have the guy youâre proposing to choke to death on a little chunk of metal. You are playing with fire here.
Still, theyâre happy with their plan. Until they turn around and see theyâve made a huge mess.
One bigger than you might think possible for making just one little cake. And why are there sprinkles everywhere? There are no sprinkles on the cake! What were they even doing in there?!
This has become such a mess, they decide they canât continue to make food here. Theyâll use Celiaâs kitchen (and her dining room and her dishes) instead and leave this mess to animated forest animals to clean up.
Bex, if you leave this mess sitting out for the rest of the day, the only animals that are going to show up to take care of it are ants. Do you want ants? Because thatâs how you get ants.
Cyrus and Buffy show up at the gym. Cyrus excuses himself to grab something out of his locker, which should be Buffyâs first clue that something is up. Thereâs no way Cyrus has anything important in his gym locker.
TJ shows up. Buffy says, âWell, well, if it isnât Jock-iavelliâ thinking sheâs gonna catch TJ off-guard, but TJ knows who Machiavelli is because he has a numbers-related learning disability, not a lack of intelligence.
Buffy really walked into that one.
TJ tells her he got a two-game suspension for Buffy doing his homework. That makes Buffy feel better. It also feels like something he couldâve mentioned to soften the blow back in that scene that shall not be mentioned. If he was suspended from the team with Buffy, that certainly makes the outcome of that scene look more like a careless mistake on his part than a Jockiavellian chess move. Itâs two months later and the writing of that scene still bothers me with how incoherent and discordant it is. But, really, though, who even cares anymore? (I mean, besides me. I do. But Iâm not well. So...)
TJâs back on the team and wants to know why Buffy isnât coming back. He tries to goad her into playing when Cyrus shows up too soon and blows his and TJâs plan by asking if theyâre going to do a one-on-one match or something.
Buffy figures out their game but still grabs her gym clothes to get ready. She doesnât turn down a challenge, even a sloppily executed one.
Yeah. You gotta at least do a dry run. Use Trash Can Buffy. Sheâs hasnât been talked to in weeks and is probably very lonely.
Speaking of very lonely, Bex visits Celia, but only to trick her into leaving her house. Bex has gotten Celia a suite for the night with room service and spa treatment (all charged to Ham, of course).
Sort of feels like: you know Celiaâs having a tough time, and you know she loves Bowie, why not let her stay and be a part of this? I get if itâs going to be intimate, but Andiâs going to be there. Itâs already two generations of Mack women. Whatâs one more? Sheâs close family. Itâs not like youâre inviting Gus.
Celia heads off to her one night vacation and Bex sneaks Andi into the house via the backdoor. Andi has supplies for dinner and a newfound appreciation for pots.
Pots. Is there anything they canât do?
Back at the gym, TJ and Buffy start their one-on-one. Cyrus keeps score. Former bitter enemies! A competitive one-on-one! Friendships on the line!
What will happen?! The drama is starting to heat up and then we cut to--
ASPARAGUS!
SALAD!
A CHEEEEEESE PLAAAAAAATEEEEEE!!!
Can you feel the excitement?! Is it pumping through your veins like so much red hot blood?!
Bex takes a chicken out of the oven!
Andi shucks corn!
Fasten your safety harness! You must be this tall to ride and women who are pregnant or thinking of ever becoming pregnant should get back. If you have a heart condition, youâd better look away! You. Will. Die!
Iâm sorry. I know Iâm going in way too hard on this scene. Itâs still Andiâs show and her story still has to be at the forefront. But this episode was killing me.
I know everything before the big scene at the end with Bowie -- the ring picking, the planning, the cake baking, the food preparing -- is all in service of setting it up. But the dramatic stakes in these scenes are almost nil. Itâs just like, a bunch of happy montage stuff. Which I normally donât have a problem with on this show -- itâs usually cute and peppy -- but when you compare it to the actual interesting stuff thatâs going on at this exact moment in the gym? The two scenes are so many dramatic miles apart that you canât stand at one and see the other. Itâs somewhere beyond the horizon.
And itâs especially irritating when youâre cutting away from the gym in the middle of the drama to this fluff. Itâs giving me whiplash.
Anyway, Andi asks Bex how much corn she should shuck and Bex says to shuck âem all and let God sort them out.
Then Bex just starts listing food they have sitting on the counter in plain sight for all to see.
They wonder if this is too much food. Andi remembers they made a cake, too. Bex says thatâs right, they did make a cake! Do you remember when they made a cake? Do you remember that scene? I do. It was literally five minutes ago. It wasnât even in a different act. It was this same one after the commercial break. But Iâm so glad to be reminded. Thank you for reminding me. Letâs remember some more things. Remember when Andi was shucking corn and asked how many corns she should shuck and Bex said shuck âem all? That was good times. I hope this scene continues for several more minutes as we just remember those moments. Maybe Bex can list the foods she sees near her one more time.
Terri Minsky, if you read this, Iâm sorry. Iâm just joking around.
But you do make me crazy sometimes.
We head back to the gym where several basketballs bounce across the floor like Old West tumbleweeds.
Itâs also kind of a weird thing to happen in a gym with only three people in it. Who knocked over the basketball cart?
TJ and Buffy trade baskets back and forth. Cyrus is fading but still keeps score.
It feels like this puts TJ at a disadvantage, because of his dyscalculia. This is blatant math privilege.
Buffy finally beats TJ to the rim and puts in a layup to win their battle. Buffy celebrates and the crazed fan in attendance storms the court.
Cyrus and Buffy hug. TJ and Buffy congratulate each other on a good game. Cyrus says that means the plan worked. Itâs been proven through science that TJ and Buffy can play together and thus, Buffy needs to rejoin the basketball team.
But Buffy says sheâs still not going to. But sheâs not going to quit basketball. Sheâs starting a girlsâ team instead. Cyrus and TJ give her props for having an even better-er plan than their plan.
At Celiaâs, Bex and Andi anxiously await Bowieâs arrival. He finally shows up, but he says heâs brought a surprise with him.
And that surprise is, a group of vagrants?
Or itâs just Bowieâs band. Or maybe... both?
The band showed up out of the blue and theyâre staying for dinner. So. Thatâs neat. What a neat little thing for them to do without asking ahead of time.
Andi and Bex decide theyâre still going to go through with the proposal, though.
TJ, Cyrus, and Buffy walk together out of school. Cyrus thinks they can all be friends now. TJ thinks so, too. But Buffy is not so sure because she hasnât done anything horrible to TJ like heâs done to her.
She thinks sheâs forgiven him but friendship might still be out of reach. Maybe, she says, if TJ delivered the best apology ever. Cyrus asks him to give a shot. TJ takes a deep breath and...
Wait. Letâs stop a second here.
Weâve talked a lot about the acting on the show this season, especially as far as the kids go. There have been several really touching, deep moments that theyâve handled with excellence.
But nothing. Nothing! Compares to what happens here.
If you came to me before this episode and told me that TJ was going to deliver his end-of-redemption-arc apology to Buffy via a super-sincere, basketball-themed rap, I wouldâve shouted âNo!â and I probably wouldâve taken a swing at you. And thatâs knowing full well it wasnât your fault. Itâs not even with intent to hurt you. It would just be my body reacting to that stimulus with some kind of violent impulse I couldnât control. Lashing out at that specific moment because it would be the only way I could think of to express myself.
But hereâs the thing. The fact that I not only didnât cringe so hard that I burst into flames while watching this, but that I actually thought it worked and I really liked it as a moment? Give Luke all the awards for pulling that off. Give him an Emmy. Give him a Tony, too. Give him the whole damn EGOT and throw in a Peopleâs Choice Award and a Nobel Prize in Physics with it.
So, Luke/TJ/DJ Fruity Mixitup launches into this crazy rap and itâs so... freakinâ... sweet. Heâs not making a joke about it or anything. Itâs heartfelt and honest. This is like publicly apologizing to a trash can to the tenth power. I still canât believe this is happened.
Terri Minsky, I forgive you for all the food montages.
Also, I know thereâs been some talk about Cyrus making him do this, but thereâs no way that entire thing was freestyle. Some is. He obviously had to incorporate the new information about the girls basketball team. But the rest? I mean, Iâll argue all day that TJ isnât dumb, but I donât think heâs some rap prodigy. He absolutely knew coming in that he was going to apologize to Buffy today. It was part of the plan. And if he didnât spend a couple of hours writing out the majority of that rap, he at least took the time to sit down and outline it. You donât just drop a Liam Neeson reference out of nowhere.
Buffy accepts the apology. Maybe they can be friends.
TJ heads off, but not before looking back.
Which is interesting to us as an audience, because we understand the significance. But in the show, only Jonah and Amber do. Cyrus and Buffy donât.
So youâd imagine the conversation would go like:
Buffy: Is he looking back here? What does he want?
Cyrus: I donât know. (shouting) What?
TJ: (shouting) Huh?!
Cyrus: What- do you need something?
TJ: What?
Cyrus: Did you forget something?
TJ: No. Iâm just looking back!
Cyrus: Why?
TJ: It means something! It has significance!
Cyrus: Huh?!
TJ: Forget it! Weâll solve this in season three!
Cyrus: (waving) Ok! Bye!
...and scene.
Back at Celiaâs, this odd, odd dinner party is in full swing. Bowie and the only guy in the band who talks exchange stories from the road when Celia shows up to bust the party.
Celiaâs upset until Bex explains theyâre going to propose to Bowie. And then Celia is not so upset anymore.
Back at the dinner table, they prepare the cake. Before they can get to the ring, though, the only guy in the band who talks speaks up. He has something to say first, to Bowie. See, the band came here especially to see Bowie. Then the band member gets on one knee.
Terri Minsky, you monster! For making the gayest moment in this episode occur between Bowie and his bandâs drummer, you are once again on the bad list!
Even Celiaâs like, this is some gay stuff going on here.
The band member says the band has booked their first international tour and they need him back. Bowie is honored but thinks about Andi. The band member asks him to come for just six months, but Bowie canât.
But then Andi and Bex tell him he can, so Bowie says heâll think about it.
Andi and Bex break off to talk. They want him to go on the tour. Bex says for that to happen though, she canât propose, because if she does, he wonât leave. Andi says propose and tell him itâs ok to go. As long as heâs locked down, itâs all good. Celia shows up and says donât let him go in the first place. The argument continues. Bex says they canât propose if one of them doesnât want to, but Andi says thatâs a new rule and not allowed.
Oh, right. This is why you donât do joint proposals.
They want to cut the cake out in the dining room. Andi and Bex tell Celia the ring is in the cake and she, rightly, points out that thatâs a worse choking hazard than the toothpick she pulled out of it.
They go running out to the dining room and Bex does the only thing she can think of: shoves her hands deep into the cake.
Then Andi joins in. And so does Bowie.
Celia warns the band members that none of these three have washed their hands, as if those guys donât look like they eat most of their meals off the floor of the tour van.
After thoroughly destroying the cake, Bowie comes across the ring.
He wants to know what it is, and Andi and Bex respond as only Macks under pressure can: with a lot of âUmâs.
We cut to black and thatâs that for season 2.
Whew. What a ride. And now begins another long, cold hiatus.
Hey, if youâve read any of my recaps this season, thank you so much. Iâve got a few more things planned for the near-term following this, but pretty shortly Iâm going to take something of a hiatus, too, to do other stuff with my life until season three. Iâll pop in and out, but I probably wonât be doing too much writing, so if you want to discuss some of whatâs happened, send your asks in soon. Feel free to send silly asks, too, but fair warning, Iâm aiming to just do some analysis type posts related to season 2 for now, while itâs still relevant and fresh in our minds. Iâm not ignoring you, but silly asks will probably be put off until season 3.
Otherwise, see you guys on the other side.
#Andi Mack#Bex Mack#Cyrus Goodman#Buffy Driscoll#TJ Kippen#Bowie Quinn#Celia Mack#Andi#episode recaps
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