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cloudslou · 2 years ago

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how i would change “do revenge” to make it a better movie:

(spoilers for “do revenge”. obviously.)

-fashion is too try-hard and also too homogeneous across the whole movie. i feel like if the movie wanted to better hit the clueless/mean girls mark they were clearly going for, the fashion needs to stand out on who matters. if every character, every student at the school, has “good” clothes and looks like they were styled to be an instagram model, it doesnt really tell us much about the main characters when they also dress like that. re: clueless and mean girls, cher and dionne��s fashion is very unique to them in the movie, and the plastic’s fashion firmly establishes them as the Mean Girls they are.

-the film wastes too much time on gabbi and russ as eleanor and drea’s love interests, when that time would have been better spent developing the friendship between eleanor and drea themselves. sure, we see them Plan Revenge and Do Revenge, but it could have been worthwhile to see them in other settings. do they hang out when they’re not plotting revenge? what do they talk about when they’re not talking about revenge? and so this would have added weight to the scene when drea forgets eleanor’s birthday or when eleanor “realizes she’s changed”.

-there are so many gaps in the passage of time that its so boring. like the title cards of “summer” and “fall” and “spring” dont actually. move you thru the story, mostly they feel lazy. throughout the movie we move through an entire year but all of it feels stagnant.

-movie immediately goes soooo downhill as soon as its ~revealed~ (w little to no foreshadowing as far as i saw) that eleanor is like. actually on her own team and is doing this whole revenge plot against drea. like so downhill its such a weird and obnoxious “twist” and she also garners so sympathy from it. like she.... convinced drea to get not One but Two people in legal trouble for drug possession and ruin their lives? and then she actually does leak max’s personal texts, lies to literally everyone (including love interest gabbi), threatens to frame drea’s MOM for drug possession, and literally hits drea w he car. so its just. like there is no rooting for eleanor. and tbh its just such a shallow turn of events and diverges from a well-structured bad teen movie in order to basically starve itself of any salvageable good parts.

-and then somehow, with no real apology or redemption arc, DREA is apologizing to ELEANOR? telling her she’s maybe the best friend she’s ever had, and moments w her were the happiest of her last year?

-also how does MAX find out the whole story via eleanor’s phone at the admissions party? drea and eleanor were committing literally crimes just texting abt it on iphone? AND eleanor doesnt have a password-protected phone? and somehow, after eleanor and drea’s friendship falls apart, their text messages also tell the story of eleanor’s Ultimate Revenge Plan, the one that was told out loud and in person? that whole part just felt like “how can we make this more convoluted and add no substance to this story at all”.

-tbh if the movie wanted to do like “psycho lesbian goes on a revenge spree” thing they could have like. actually gone for it and made it a very action-packed, eleanor-thinks-she-has-no-consequences-coming-for-her, high-emotion movie but they....dont? eleanor says she feels things but doesnt seems to feel much at all? it doesnt help the maya hawke is like supremely bad at selling me on the character. and if they wanted to do “fucked up soulmates”, again, they could get better actors, and also they could have written a story in which drea and elenaor are actually on equal terms when it comes to being “fucked up”, cus rn we have “actually a horrific person” eleanor and “was just a childhood bully and high school mean girl” drea.

-everyone in this movie could stand to, like, become better actors

-here is my better plot idea: keep the “two very different high school girls were fucked over by people they cared about, and they team up to get revenge on those who wronged them”. they develop a real and genuine friendship despite coming from ~different worlds~, but as the school year progresses drea becomes too entrenched in getting revenge; eleanor’s revenge has been completed, but drea’s is harder and she cant move on from what happened to her. in the same vein, eleanor becomes a bit unrecognizable as she blends in more and more with drea’s former friends, the popular kids (in a very cady heron/mean girls way). the scene at eleanor’s bday part remains pretty much the same: drea forgets her bestie’s bday bc she’s too caught up in her revenge fantasy, but eleanor also gets a call out for becoming too buddy-buddy with the people who destroyed HER bestie’s life. after this fight, they spend time apart which makes them realize that the friendship they developed together was more valuable than revenge the whole time. so they reunite, make amends, etc and get back on track on completely drea’s revenge. once drea’s revenge is completed, they swear to give up on any further revenge aspirations (to show “growth”) and then the end scene where they skip their graduation and drive away singing also remains unchanged; it is symbolic of them letting go of their pasts and letting go of high school.

#sorry i just have so many thoughts #the move just turned sooooo bad its crazy

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pxppinmolly-archived · 3 years ago

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💞👶🌀🌹⌛️

* Sunday HC Stuff // Accepting

💞 Would your muse ever consider a threesome (or more!)

SHE’S STILL WAITING ON THAT FIZZ/OZZIE SANDWICHING-!!!!!!

yeah ofc she has and continues to. Molly has been apart of orgies before esp when she was younger but not so much anymore because tbh lotta people aren’t shit and while YES she is easy one night stands are easier 2 pick and orgies she’s like i like to separate my peas from my mashed potatoes yk

But yeah she loves that shit. Esp if she’s the one w the center of attention <3 OAKSDJFG

👶 Does your muse want children?

SO FUCKING BAD.

IT’S ONE OF THE FEW THINGS SHE EVER WANTED IN HER DAMN LIFE.

And now she’ll never fucking get it. ... Canonically. Cus I said before yk I am willing to throw that shit out the window for THIS instance cus Im greedy n think Molly should get indulgence BUT

By default though I follow in sinners being infertile until/unless a ship partner wants 2 thread pregnancy/baby stuff in the future BUT by default yeah she is forever heartbroken and depressed of forever having a fucking empty nest.

This is why Molly spoils nearly any fucking youth she comes across she is a fucking mother hen.

🌀 What are 3 of muse’s top kinks?

Mommy kink. Breast smothering. Exhibitionism. Flipping through my f-list page. and feeling I need 2 upd8 this again

and tbh the third one can always change but the first two are constants LOL

🌹 Is your muse more interested in love or lust?

IDEALLY... She’s always interested in love.

Molly wants love. So bad. She just wants to be loved and cared after and just feel like someone gives a shit about HER... And not just for her name, her status, her body and looks, etc ...

But like you know through her entire life the only way she could ever feel that is THROUGH lust and Molly CONTINUES to act upon lust as a means to get a ‘quick fix’ of feeling like she’s cared for and desired and wanted because that’s the quickest and like. only way she believes herself to ever get it!

because that’s all she’s ever been treated as in her life yk.

and like.. this isnt to also say she just doesnt love sex in general. cus she does. its good. its fun. she does it just to do it, too but there’s sometimes it’s more of the fact of just. needing to FEEL something.

It’s an addiction like anything else really. Being exposed to such things at A VERY YOUNG AGE even /before/ she officially lost her virginity it’s just become so cemented into her person ykwim

But yeah so She’s interested in both, for sure, but in the long term she always wants love over lust

like for example with an Alastor or two she’s been with she has been PERFECTLY FINE not having sex with them... At all. Like Summer’s Alastor for example Molly hasn’t slept with yet and they’ve been together for. A long dang time. And Molly tries to initiate sometimes but he doesn’t catch on, and he ends up making her laugh or ends up just distracting her w other bits of physical affections and Molly is like Well this is fine! <3

⌛️ How long does your muse last in bed?

She can last all night and morning. From 8 PM to 8 AM. A whole twelve hours until she starts getting tired - and that is IF she’s enjoying herself with her partner. Molly is hopped up on so many drugs + adrenaline + just the enjoyment of a good time in general she can GO.

Molly HAS went even days doing sexual activity before, but. It wasn’t any fun having fun times </3 but through it she’s managed to gain quite the bit of stamina through it all and got semi used to it for awhile until ... Finally we have normalcy again but yk

#Sugar Spun (Asks)#fizzarolli #Please Do Not Judge I Had A Lot To Drink (Headcanons)#nsft text #thank u tully as per usual i can count on u 2 least make me answer shit -#POLAKSDJD #long post /

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hanamakkiss · 4 years ago

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Haikyuu boys cooking

Shiratorizawa | Nekoma | Karasuno

time for krows kakao~

Sawamura Daichi ↠ a responsible cook! uses (in everyone else opinion) too little seasoning BUT HE MEANS WELL 😭😭 so u just eat it but when he turns his back while cooking add some more salt in there!!! it needs it 😂😂😂 loves cooking with you sososoo much cus its one of the times where u actively spend time together. does sappy things like dance with u while waiting for the water to boil 🥰 and buys matching aprons

Sugawara Koushi ↠ ask him if he can cook and he'll give u the most beautiful smile and say "😇no😇" i mean, look at that face, makes u want to cook for him!!! 😒😠🥺🥰 all the neighbourhood aunties love him and bring him food all. the. time.😋 he doesnt know how to cus he nevers needs to! even when yall start living together he just keeps bringing home food from the neighbours!!!

Azumane Asahi ↠ can but rather bakes. and hes really good at it!! like baking cause the motions are calming and it helps with his anxiety. likes to listen to podcast whilst doin so. a panic baker too when hes stressed he instinctively bakes so you always have sweets at home LMAO. bakes ur fave desserts when ur down 🍮🧁😘

Tanaka Ryunnosuke ↠ knows the basics but isnt very good at it but if you're too tired to cook he will definitely whip up a meal for u!!! practices really hard to at least be able to cook ur fave dish well!!🥰🥰🥰 a fantastic person to cook for LMAO cus hes used to saeko and will give anything a try at least one cus sometimes they turn out ✨amazing✨

Nishinoya Yuu ↠ king of reaheating leftovers!!! no patience for cooking but somehow manages to make day old food taste fresh again. share your secrets young man 🔪🔪 dont lose sight of ur food while reheating cus he WILL snatch it up. doesnt matter how much he loves u cus he thinks with his stomach 🤤🤤🤤 makes up to u w ice cream (bitch!!! my lagsana!!!) absolute joy to cook for tho he eats everything

Hinata Shouyou ↠ king of prep!! cuts veggies🥒 and fruits🍑 so finely and beautifully u ask him for help all the time. he learnt from his mum when he was younger, but didnt actually do the cooking part. really good at making garnishes like apple bunnies and tomato roses. when he makes one he shows it to u excitedly and makes u go 🥰🥰🥰

Kageyama Tobio ↠ LMAO u think he can work a stove??? banned from the kitchen after he made an egg explode once. u tried asking what happened but he looked so traumatised u just let it go. will stay around the doorway just in case. (in case of WHAT? but he doesnt answer🥴)

Tsukishima Kei ↠ can do it but hates cooking😒 he thinks the clean up is too much of a hassle. if u ask him to help u he pretends he didnt hear u and puts on his headphones LMAO 🙄 in a pinch he just throws ingredients into a pot and hopes for the best

Yamaguchi Tadashi ↠ he can't! but only cause it... never crossed his mind to try? so when u ask him if he cooks he blanks out 😶 but after that he's super enthusiatic about learning and watches cooking videas all. the. time LOL he always sending u vids of mouth-watering food at night and making u hungry 🤤😠😠 lots of cooking dates where you guys try your best HAHAHAH

Bonus (because i love them 🥺)

Shimizu Kiyoko ↠ can do simple meals! shes an independant woman 😗💪🏻💪🏻 so she makes healthy balanced meals (they taste so good tho 🤤🤤🤤🤤), but make sure to take turns with her otherwise in 2 weeks she has exhausted her repertoire and u might sick of the same dishes😔

Yachi Hitoka ↠ shes really really good at it!! cooking together was one of the ways her mum and her spent time together when she was younger. it helps calm her cause she associates happy memories with it!🥰🥰 and also she loves seeing people happily eat her food she is the sweetest!!! if u ever have craving let her know she'll give it a shot. also makes the cutest bentos ever 🍱🍱🍱

Tanaka Saeko ↠ she's an experimentalist! once in a while she gets ✨inspired✨ and makes some... questionable changes to a recipe and its a hit or miss LMAO the bads are really bad but the good experiments taste so heavenly 🤤 u wonder if she should open a resturant but she forgets the recipe immediately so u probably wont taste it again 😭😭

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vampire-christ · 4 years ago

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i want to make my own memories. not rely on making them with someone else.

i want to ride alone at night and listen to dave matthews and the doors.

there are so many stupid restrictions keeping me from doing small shit that i want to do. nobody wants to take me driving, i have my permit still and i only have a few hours on it and i need 60 hours. they aren’t even trying to help me. i last drove 3 months ago. i want my license, i want to go out and drive and listen to music like how my mom did with me when i was young.

if i was in new york, my family would help me with my permit. i wish my dad taught me to drive. maybe this summer he can help me drive, i already know how though. idk he can just teach me what i dont know. we can go driving at night and listen to music.

i always say i want to go back but id miss my mom and my brother too much. i dont want my brother to be alone, we only have each other. i dont want talk ab tht rn im gona cry (+_+) but i always say i want to go back but i cant go back unless its the summer. and whenever my grandma decides to come. i tried to ask her if i could come earlier and she lectured me about how ive changed and i dont do good in school or hang out with my family. how is she supposed to know that if shes not here? i spend time with my family and i hate being around too many ppl n i hate loud noises but i still hang out w everyone, what is ur problem? and she was talking about how ive cut my hair n dyed it and do crazy makeup and wear revealing clothing. i dont see what any of that has to do with me coming back earlier but ok thanks for making me feel insecure again. i changed how i looked because i didnt like how i used to look and now im not insecure ab my looks; until u said something about it. but im over it now, but spent like a week covering up and not getting ready or anything thanks <3 she says my mom doesnt like how i look but i know that isnt true, she took me to get my hair dyed and she never says anything bas about my makeup or hair. why would she even say that, its not what my mom thinks its what you think. she always does that, pretty sure she used to talk abt my moms weight to her and she did it to me too. are u insecure ab ur own weight or smn why r u telling me to suck in my gut? i love her no matter what but she can be so rude. and tht just made me so sad like this why i never ask anyone if i can come back early or stay longer, cus they always make excuses for me not to stay or do that shit where they bring up irrelevant shit. makes me so anxious n tht whole time she was telling me tht shit i was crying n i didnt know what to reply to her. n then afterwards i feel dumb cus i couldve said more but i get overwhelmed and mt mind shuts off. stupid

this got so off track :|

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starrspice · 5 years ago

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Rose Quartz isn't a villain

Unpopular opinion. But here we go

This is My personal two cents. This isn't ordered well its kind of all over the place.

WARNING. ITS REALLY LONG

A lot of people (especially since the movie) have been acting and bashing Rose Quartz/Pink Diamond and acting as though she's the cruelest villain in the universe.

And here's why I don't think she is the ANTAGONIST (a person who actively opposes someone or something)

And furthermore why she falls in line as a VILLAIN ( a character whose evil actions or motives are important to the plot.)

As well as a HERO (a person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities)

Let's start with her thought process and behavior.

A big thing I see is people saying "HER ABUSE DOESNT JUSTIFY WHAT SHE DID SHES STILL A MONSTER" and it's true. Abuse doesn't justify terrible behavior but it does to some degree explain it. Pink diamond was abused by the other diamonds.

She was constantly punished for acting out, which she did not only for attention from the other diamonds (as she seemed to be left alone quite often ) but also to make them happy (which indicates that they usually are not) and bring the family together. Not only did she act out, but when punished, she was forced to say she's sorry and that she was wrong, for simply trying to make her family happy and feel less miserable herself.

Pink was basically trained to follow homeworlds rules and not to question anything. And was forced to live a life she hated.

Yes. A lot of what Pink did and HOW she acted is due to how she was raised by the diamonds.

Diamonds are taught that THEY are the leaders. All gems and other life forms are lower than they are. And while Pink did, in fact, realize that killing the planets was wrong that may very well be all she realized. Gems weren't made to fuse with other gems, or to rebel, or to find their own path in life. All of those were things introduced by the rebels. The only reason the diamonds are getting closer to behaving and thinking better than they used to is that they had GUIDANCE. Steven helped show them a better right and wrong. He's helped them work to become better people for 2 years. And one may argue that pink/rose had thousands of years AWAY from. her abusers to become better. But the big thing she didn't have was guidance. She didn't have anyone tell her that those things weren't ok. The gems couldn't tell her that because everything they were doing is new to them. They grew and developed as people but couldn't possibly understand a stronger sense of right and wrong since it had never been questioned before and they'd never been told anything except for "Diamonds know best so we never question them" if you listen to Rose's song love like you she REALIZES SHE WAS TERRIBLE but only because she finally had someone to show her how her way thinking was resulting in terrible behavior and causing problems. "I always thought I might be bad now I'm sure that it's true, 'cus I think you're so good and I'm nothing like you. " GREG WAS HER GUIDANCE but she realized that even if she tried to be a better person. Shell always has a bit of her old self. And she may very well think That's holding her back. But she knew that steven, someone surrounded by people better than she ever could be. And by a strong loving father to guide him and make him kind and considerate and the amazing steven we know and love.

I know a lot of friends who have dealt with abuse. And they go on to behave all kinds if different ways. But this show depicts 2 very different ways people can behave after a childhood of abuse. Pink ran off and made her own life, but didn't necessarily become better. She continued living as she had, not knowing her behavior was wrong because she had never seen anything else or been told that it was wrong. She acted how she was taught to act by homeworld, and as for the rebels, no one recognized how bad it was because they lived the exact same way. They were stuck and had trouble growing as people because they didn't know how to grow. Steven taught them. That's why pearl lives for herself now instead of rose. How Amethyst takes pride and lives with the support of her friends and family boosting her up. He taught garnet that it's ok to not know everything, and sometimes you just have to focus on what you can change rather than what you cant. He taught them that fighting doesn't always fix the problem. Pink didn't have a steven until she realized how much she truly loved Greg. How he was different from other humans because he taught her and was willing to overlook the mistakes of her past so he could help her future. Only at the end of her life did she learn that she was wrong, and selfish, and not a good person. The diamonds acted JUST like this. They all dealt with Whites abuse. And realized. They behaved wrongly. Steven showed them that. They had guidance. Yes. Some people can realize the fault in their behavior on their own. But some cant. The diamonds needed guidance to take steps towards being better. And they're still struggling to learn. But they have someone to help them. So they're trying to fix their mistakes. So yes. Pink diamond was a bad person. And she did a lot of what she did not only because of the abuse. But because of how she was taught to think. This is not to void her of fault or to excuse the things she did. But I feel like it's unfair to call her evil and cruel and heartless. EVERY SINGLE VILLAIN in steven universe has had some layer of depth of deeper reasoning for what they did. And even if you consider pink to be the real villain. The same goes for her. Evil is not inherent, just like all terrible thoughts and behavior patterns. Like racism isn't inherent, or bias or prejudice. These are behavioral traits that are TAUGHT. If a killer raises a child. That child may not think killing is wrong. Pink was raised where she was an important person who had a right to everything she wanted and her desires took priority. Once something didn't serve a purpose she was expected to get rid of it. And gems were treated like objects. They were used for walls, decorative statues. Even aquamarine said topaz was of no use to her. And was prepared to get rid of her. we know this is wrong but they don't. Not all of them anyway. Even the off colors thought they were in the wrong for being themselves. It's not as if she did all of this because she wanted to hurt those around her. She did everything how she did because she was taught to think that way or behave that way. We become the people we are through nature AND nurture. But one can have more sway on someone depending on their upbringing. Abd abusive upbringing like pink endured is bound to drill homeworlds ideals into her head that much more. Especially since she tried to go against the grain and was punished constantly for trying to save things and be better.

And a lot of complaints I see is that "if she tried to explain her feelings to the diamonds none of this would happen" but everyone seems to forget. SHE DID TRY. In the episode where ruby and sapphire split and pearl explains everything she shows that pink diamond DID try. But was scolded for it. And was ignored. Just like how white ignored blue and yellow. She used all her authority but it meant nothing. She felt trapped and took an out. She tried to make a change. It started a spark that leads to a rebellion. Gems thinking for themselves. Being themselves. She did do good things. She tried to leave as much good as she had. But she didn't really know good and bad. She is still responsible for her failures and actions. But it's so so SO wrong to just slap a label on her calling her pure evil like she WANTED to do all that damage. Its the same as calling someone a hero despite any terrible things in their past that may have lead up to that. It's fine to classify her as an antagonist because yes. She caused problems for the main character and everyone around them. But it's not ok to ignore the meanings and cause behind it. We all knew pink/rose wasn’t A good person. But it's not ok to belittle her and act like her suffering and upbringing played no part.

It just upsets me when people ignore the history of someone. And I repeat THAT DOESN’T EXCUSE HER ACTIONS but that doesn't mean its ok to label someone based on their mistakes. No. Rose isn't a good person. She didn't know how to be. But that doesn't mean shes a cruel villainess. It means she was hurt early on and never fully recovered.

People who come from abuse can rise higher than their oast and tey to be better. And sometimes they can get stuck in their past and never learn from it. But that doesn't mean it's from a lack of wanting to be better. They may just not know-how.

This explains pinks behavior. And why she isn't an ANTAGONIST. She wasn't ACTIVELY trying to harm anyone or ruin anything. She even REFUSED TO SHATTER GEMS. She had a semblance of right and wrong and what was too far, but that's as far as it went. Additionally, by the time the show takes place, Pink is gone and can no longer actively do anything against steven or the crystal gems.

So. My thoughts on Pink/Rose

Not a good person and not justified in her actions, but came off the bedside of an abusive childhood and was never taught better. Just because she's done a lot of bad things doesn't mean bashing her is ok. Try and think of it like real life. Not everyone becomes better after abuse. And not everyone has the influences and tools needed to become better after abuse. We learn right and wrong from the people around us, so what if no one around us knows proper right and wrong?

Not looking to argue and you can reply with your thoughts if you want. But that doesn't really mean ill respond (im sure ill be flooded with people telling me why I'm wrong lol)

I would go on but I feel like this is too long already

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fuckblizzardbearlover · 4 years ago

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Ok so reasons why i Love Warcraft the Beginning, and why its perfect and i hope for more. Might be a little incorherant cus i'm just doing my thoughts as they come. i dont have the time to spend hours writing articles i'm not being payed for.

Yes Warcraft is a great, i say Perfect movie. "But it has flaws". Everything does. That perfect movie you love so much? someone found it boring, someone found it pretentious , someone found it stupid. Perfect pizza? someone doesnt like your toppings, someone thought there wasnt enough for it. A movie, a show, a book, art in general cannot be judged by an arbitrary list of items it must meet to sufficient quality. "no plotholes, great acting, good effects" are not good qualifiers. Most ppl dont know the meaning of plotholes, different tons of story require different acting (Casablanca is seen as a masterpiece but i dislike movies of that era because the acting is over the top, stiff, and campy. however that does not make them bad, it just means i dont like it). Really the only way a piece of art can be judged is by judging it based on what it TRIED to do. If your character is suppose to show they are angry in this scene and they just seem constipated then you did fail and that was bad acting. But if your character is suppose to be angry and some of the audience thinks they should have acted a different way, then thats just a difference of opinion between author and audience.

So what did Warcraft the Beginning TRY to do? Pay homage to the original franchise, tell a heartfelt complex story, give a larger than life epic, and reinterpret the story into something thats better than it was and can be accepted by a general audience

-So i love how much the art, style and themes embraced the franchise. The intro was PERFECT. The little cameos and everything were well done. For some weird reason a few thought that was cringe but part of good cameos is world building. They arent putting "this way to the stoutelager inn" so fans can go "i get that refrence" they are doing it to create a scene that involves a sign to an inn and might as well be a real one from the story, right? The franchise STARTED as Err orcs bad humans good but it has since evolved past that, and you saw that with the theme of the H and A heroes banding together against guldan. The armor and costumes were perfect, using the major flair of warcraft without being overly done. Llane's and Lothar's armor is perfect example.

some people have a problem with what i'd say was the "family friendly epic fantasy adventure" aspect of the movie. yes pacing was quick but when you go into a weird story you just suspend disbelief and take things as you go. They never explain how the Flashy Thingies in men in black work, they just do. you accept it and move. And there was some slightly heavy handed themes and moments. but thats what we call Camp. Its a fantasy adventure, you have snark, a few cheesy lines, hope vs darkness and all that good stuff. I remember when Wonder Woman came out an interviewer asked about the....hammy? ending. i think they used a different word. but the idea was that it seemed...bad? that the ending revolved around Wonder woman's faith in humanity, faith in goodness and trying to do good, was naieve. And Patty Jenkens said that she thinks the world needs more hope like that, not everything is doom and gloom and the point of a hero is to be hopeful.

A GOOD movie, a PERFECT movie doesnt need to be high art. Ppl talk about inception cus it was so intense but IMO if half the audience doesnt know whats happening then its not so good is it? and like i said So many "great perfect movies' in history are boring, or weird or unlikable to many people. And i think its a great detriment to the world that people got to act like only high art movies that win awards are any good.

And then there is the story and charactes. I loved Lothar and Llane, very relatable and good example of heroic men. The mirror between the father Lothar and Durotan was great. I loved how well they did the orcs, just everything about them. Like their meeting and having it so that you could only understand the side you were listening from, if you listen when its focused on the orcs and Garona is translating you can hear Llane speaking something that is NOT english. But like even with the kinder orcs they kept the furiosity. Durotan makes it clear that their world is dead and they cannot simply go back, and thats very realisitc. even were it not for guldan if he was fighting to save his people he'd willingly fight the humans if they tried to stop them. It was great seeing them touch on the idea of the fel infused orcs with Medivh's ability to create spells that specifically target them. Oh and geeze his whole arch. the actor and directing i think did a great job of showing him struggling to do as much as he could to help the alliance against the orcs. He seemed addled, like he was losing it or on drugs but you find out it is really because the fel is taking hold of him. thats what was great about the last guardian is the whole Inner monster storyline. Betrayal of one's self and all that. And it showed the variety in the orcs, yes you had dark ones who embraced the pillage too, and its a shame that the campfire scene "but you're...Green" scene didnt make it. Kadgar, did a good job with the whole "he's smart enough to notice when his 'betters' are wrong but he's young and inexperienced and doesnt know how to assert himself" was great. Its funny cus some didnt like he didnt age, but far as i can tell nothing in warcraft even addressed that. Like he mentions once or twice in the book and in click dialogue that it sucks losing his childhood but there is no angst about it. you wouldnt know he's only in his 40s now. Even his little cinematic before legion focused on him taking up the mantle of the guardian.

And then there are the improvements it made. Rise of the Horde was good but they didnt have time to have the 'non fel orcs being around fel turn slightly green', so it was a good choice to have that dynamic visual change. Lothar's son arc i think gave him more of a personal reason to be invested in this other than "defense of our nation". And it kinda sucks in the original narrative that stormwind just kinda got its butt kicked. I'm sure it will still fall but it will be nice to see more effort put into it. And goodness we actually got to see varian's mother? and she was an important part of the story? she was an interesting character and had influence and was crucial to getting garona on their side. Speaking of , Garona by herself is the best change and alone makes this movie better than the original. She is a product of love, the first human/orc couple, presumably when Medivh was first exploring Draenor. And not a tool created by rape? Its so great that this shitty aspect of the story generated from the naive creator's idea of womens place in stories, was rewritten. Oh i'd be the first to say it wasnt malicious. but between Kerrigan and Sylvannas and Garona, heck this attitude exists today. That a man's humanity comes from his family, that he is violent emotionless and a killer but a wife brings out his peace and children his humanity . so the worst thing that can happen to him is his family is killed, thus bringing the beast back. And that for a Woman she is defined by her love of the man, does she reject him or accept him, does she play hard to get or support him? how freely does she give herself to him. And thus the worst thing that can happen to a woman is to have her body violated, and what many guys who grew up in the 70s-90s fantasy era that was the go to story. Woman is violated (in body) and gets her revenge and feels empowered by killing her rapist. while the man is violated by those he LOVES being killed, and empowered by avenging them and finding a new family (or a way to honor the dead ones)

So yea its REALLy awesome that this story rejected that whole farse and said "no, the key behind saving both peoples is a young woman who exists because 2 people from different planets loved each other"

#decided to leave this hear to repost elsewhere when people are awake #warcraft #duncan Jones #warcraft the beginning #the world of warcraft

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skiasurveys · 5 years ago

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393

1. How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are? um,,? I would assume I was a young adult ig?

2.Which is worse, failing or never trying? never trying, b/c you would never know if you were good or not. 3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do? idk..man because we feel forced by society 4. When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done ? I hope not. 5. What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world? I wish people would stop flexing. 6. If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich? spending time with my loved ones tbh, and making art. 7. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing? rn i am in college so 8. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently? no different. 9. To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken? a little, im trying to fix it. 10. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? doing things right..i always think im gonna be a failure. 11. You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do? I would let them know that she is my friend and i find it disrespectful of what theyre saying. 12. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? Honestly, dont worry about what others say. do what you want. 13. Would you break the law to save a loved one? yeah i would.

14. Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity? Yeah look at most art lol 15. What’s something you know you do differently than most people? Im not sure... 16. How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy? because were all just different people? 17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? travel really. I want to see more of the world and cultures.

18. What’s holding you back? money.

19. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of? yeah my fathers death.

20. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why? maybe the UK? and Idk its different and i dont wanna live in the us. 21. Do you push the elevator button more than once? not really. 22. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton? joyful 23. Why are you, you? life experiences.

24. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? I think i have but i do have a lot to work on. 25. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you? losing touch. it sucks when you can feel them slipping away right from your fingers and you cant change it. we live in a world where face time is a thing so when someone moves it doesnt feel that much different. 26. What are you most grateful for? My mom 27. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones? fuck. Never make new ones. 28. Is it possible to know the truth without challenging it first? idk..? 29. What is your greatest fear? Has it ever come true? Drowning. lol

30. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now? it wouldve been either when my friend hurt me or when my dad had died. so yeah. 31. What is your happiest childhood memory? vaca with dad

32. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive? im not sure.. 33. If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose? idk. 34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever? Of course, sometimes the best people are the people you dont have to make up a lot of words. 35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars? Cus humans. 36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil? yes and no. we all have our set of morals. for sure murder is evil..i would hope everyone would agree. 37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job? yes. even tho i just got it but like i hate working LOL. 38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing? more work i like to do 39. Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before? yes.

40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in? what

41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today? i would try to see them all lol

42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous? Of course LOL

43. What is the difference between being alive and truly living? alive is just doing ur boring ass shit every day but living is like actually doing what u love lol 44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right? you just know tbh 45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake? because we dont wanna look stupid or hurt others. depending on the mistake. 46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? dress better and be more active with my social media career. 47. When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing? right now 48. What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love? i love art, i always have. it just lets me express myself without feeling weird. 49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? i will for sure b/c i just started working at this shit job so ill for sure remember this. i better not be here in 5 years or ill kms. 50. Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you? myself but i always ask ppl for advice to help me. so both?

#survey #deep questions

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lenjaminmacbuttons · 5 years ago

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Hope you’re doing okay, I know there’s been a lot going on the past couple weeks. 🌈🌈💛💛

FOOF YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN

thank you for the good vibes anon, i love you and it means a lot to me. however unfortunately now im gonna use this to vent dump exactly how much has been going on the past couple weeks off the top of my head. this is actually pretty far from Everything thats happen but im so tired and dont want to think about any of it anymore

my grandma passed away last week. we were prepared for it and we know she’s at peace in a better place et cetera et cetera, her body was all full of restraints & impediments that she doesnt have to deal with anymore and the next time she’s in a body it’ll be all New And Improved and awesome. i missed so much work in anticipation of this that now i can’t get work off on the day of the funeral, so i can still go to it but i’ll have to go immediately to work right from it and have to pretend everythings fine and dandy and nothings going on.

everyone at work Does know there’s something going on however and the two coworkers i have who are actually like i consider them friends mostly they’re all like Hey Im Here For You Talk About Your Feelings Honestly with me and i. dont. want. to talk about my feelings at work. thats not what work is for and i dont like talking about my feelings anyway and i dont want them to ask anymore

the changes to the handbook and the honor code have completely sunk my heart. i had so much hope up until those hideous ridiculous unfathomably transphobic things they wrote and now i don’t feel like i can trust or have hope in ANYTHING the institution does anymore. ive been up all night going back and forth over whether i want to go to church today. or ever again. it’s not bringing me joy. it’s making me feel anxious and depressed and frustrated and alone. i keep seeing people just on the street or on facebook who are so happy and content with the church and whatever it does and i just…i get struck every single time with this thought of “they don’t care about me. they don’t care about any of these problems. they’re not affected personally by it and so they don’t care.”

and then that makes me feel like such a hypocrite because!!! ive been them too for so long!! what makes this moment so different!!!!! why is this the straw that breaks the camel’s back when the camel should have thrown off the whole burden and run to join its friends at the first strike of the owner’s whip!!!!!!

plus it’s making me feel gross about my mormon memes blogs. idk if i can keep running those anymore.

im failing this semester anyway and i keep getting emails about it. i was planning to take a break from school After this semester but ive missed so much class that i just really can’t go back to any of them so i guess im just dropping out right now. as much as i’d love to participate in all the incredible amazing protests going on right now i really really cant be on campus at all without feeling literally physically ill. and my Hope was to do really well this last semester and then submit mission papers and that way i’d know exactly what next to do with my life until i decide what After, and id be able to Get Out somewhere and travel someplace while still feeling like my life has some semblance of structure and direction. however! HOWEVER!!!!!!!!

i’ve been feeling so, so horrible and so worn down and i dont even know where or what my testimony is anymore. but that’s probably a lot lower on the list of Why I Can’t Serve A Mission, because a. i still don’t trust my Local Bishop enough to talk to him about things The Handbook says to b. i am finding it harder and harder and harder to be perceived as female. i never really have dysphoria about my body or my presentation or anything but like, when people say Sister and Ma’am and Miss and Daughter and Hey Pretty Lady It’s Me Your Relief Society President it’s like…that’s not me. that feels gross. and i wear suits and ties to church, have done so for a while and never get any flak for it, and im gradually working up the nerve to maybe start introducing myself as lev or levi instead of lillie buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut. socially transitioning apparently is not allowed.

not to mention my temple recommend expired ages ago anyway. anxiety about bishops prevented me from ever going in for an interview to renew it. i haven’t visited the temple once since before graduating high school. but every time i see it or think about it i long for it so badly and it hurts so much.

and also like, i get that same kinda horrible regretful longing feeling whenever i hear violin music? because i played violin for a few years and then stopped but i still have the instrument because it was given to me by my grandmother. who played it herself until sickness wouldn’t let her anymore and she entrusted it to me and i Stopped Playing but then i hoped to pick it up enough to at least learn how to play her favorite song and aw wouldn’t that be so nice to play that for her on her violin except i never actually got around to printing out the sheet music or practicing At All. and now she’s gone.

and one of the last things she said to me was that she would love to hear my book since her eyesight was too gone to read it so i said i’d record it as soon as i got the right software/hardware to do that and then i never did that either. also i promised alla yalls that book would be Published Published coming up on four months ago now and i still haven’t done that

i took a pair of safety scissors to my forearms as mentioned in a previous post and surprise surprise, the lines have not healed still, it’s getting warmer outside and thus harder to wear long sleeves, and guess what! a while ago on a separate occasion i complained that i kinda wished my self harm scars looked more like the classic cutter lines and Now They Do!! And I Hate It!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and a couple nights ago my little sister saw them and so i told her i got attacked by a spider-pawed bear and fortunately my brother Understands and backed me up like “dang what do they teach in schools these days i cant believe youve never heard of the spider-pawed bears that live in the mountains and are totally normal and real”

and steven universe is ending. that’s a thing.

and like….okay. not everything in my emotions right now is bad. some of it is just complicated. one coworker friend i have recently confessed that she’s had a crush on me for several months now. fortunately when she said this i was able to be honest and say that im not super eager for a relationship right now, im not ready in the slightest to settle down or anything, im still hung up on my high school crush and also dealing with issues from my last relationship, and she replied that’s all perfectly fine and she doesn’t have any expectations and she’s great being friends and we can take things at whatever pace is good

except i also now have a date with said high school crush loosely planned for tomorrow and i told this coworker friend about it and she admitted it’s making her a little jealous and then she said jealous is an ugly word and amended it to Insecure and i feel bad about that

but i also like. am really excited for this date. like it’s not really a for sure romantic capital-d Date and that’s fine, but i haven’t seen this friend irl for so long and ive been missing her so much over this past little while that we’ve been internet chatting and that ive been i guess officially falling back in love with her but i also like, i dont know what her deal is romantically right now i don’t want to presume anything but i really really really am itching to see her

work is stressful. it’s only gonna get more so as weather gets warmer. but we’re getting two new managers with loads of experience and glowing reviews next week. i have hope that they’ll makes things a little lighter.

and there’s also. good things. peridot took off her visor for the first time ever in canon and i saved like 50 different gifs of it to my computer cus it rocked my world. sonic has she-ra toys for the kids meals and i managed to snag a tiny inflatable version of the sword. i’m making cosplays of the tres horny boys from the adventure zone and they’re all very exciting and making things makes me very very happy. i’m finding joy in all the fanfictions i’m writing right now and in talking about dungeons & dragons with my brothers and friends. ducknerva is a very beautiful Good Ending version of marahope which makes me happy and taako is a super effective projection outlet. i bought cupcakes today and they were delicious. and when i think about those good things, when i think about any good thing no matter how small, everything else disappears.

whatever happens happens i guess.

she who lives will see.

#talkyllama #hey if anyone needs tags on posts like these please please let me know asap #i always forget that actual people see the things i post #i dont usually trigger tag cus i dont usually think i need to but if i do i will

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goddamnmuses-a · 5 years ago

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Dan Watches: Star Wars: Episode I -The Phantom Menace

So.. I got the idea of writing my thoughts up as I go basically as they get to the Gungan city so.. i’ll try and remember my thoughts before that and then I’ll do it kinda live. Under the cut cus long.

Alright.. So the opening crawl was very.. politics which to be honest as i’ve got older I actually kind of enjoy that side of Star Wars but it doesn’t really add anyhting to the actual film because I think everything thats in it could be picked up by just watching the film.

I kinda like the battle droids.. weird soft spot for them. I like the big ship ones too and Droidekas i thought were the coolest shit ever when i was a kid and i stand by that.

I’m not all that bothered by the racial stereotypes because like.. i’m not the races they’re sterotyping but i can see why it’d be problematic.

Jar Jar isn’t as annoying as everyone makes him out to be.. don’t get me wrong.. he’s annoying.. but he’s not cancer.

Aesthetically the Gungan City is pretty cool, giant underwater bubble city.. i bet there’s cool fan art of it somewhere.

Alright now we’re live.. The duck things the Gungans ride are weird.

Do Gungans like JarJar eventually become the giant Green guy? .. I googled apparently they’re just two different races of Gungan despite looking like totally different Aliens.

It’s nice that all races are like “Life debt? Oh yeah thats a legit thing.”

Gungans speak like English or Common or.. i forget the Star Wars term.. Basic? is their second language.. but it isnt.

Yooo Qui Gon just made JarJar go to sleep using the force.. Why is Force Sleep not a thing in more stuff... gotta keep an eye out for that now.

Naboo is pretty.

Padme is so extra, she’s in her iconic red dress that’s already extra as fuck and then sees that she’s been captured and is like “Alright.. but first.. wardrobe change!” and then shows up in some black number. I’m not sure if at this point she’s actually Padme or if Padme is pretending to be one of her servants now but either way she had a costume change and nobody questions it so she must be having costume changes all the time.

When Qui Gon force pushes two battle droids theres a really weird sound effect that sounds like it belongs in a mario game.

Pretty sure Padme is the handmaid now and this new Queen should take the opportunity to be like “Yoo peace out bitches.” Then we get Keira Knightley’s adventures in Star Wars.

Also who was she before this swaparoo? Was she a handmaid and just suddenly got promoted to queen? Like she could be saying all sorts of shit. I know she gets revealed later on but think of how much she could do whilst Padme is away.

The first words ever spoken to R2 in Star Wars, chronologically, (although inderectly) are “Hello Boyos”. Just sit with that.

The first words spoken to him directly are “How rude.” which seems about right tbf with how sassy he is.

Darth Maul is awesome.

Keira Knightly or Sabe (I looked it up) is like “Yo actual queen, clean that droid!” i think she just wanted to feel more powerful than the actual queen there, little power trip.

Nice Poncho Qui Gon. Cal approves.

I wonder how long Padme took to convince the others to let her go off alone with Qui Gon and Jar Jar and R2 (Dunno why R2 joins them?) on a planet thats ruled by the Hutts

I kinda like Watto.. not as a person.. he just amuses me.

Kinda cool that Anakin can speak Huttese, wish he spoke it more often.. just cursing in Huttese as Obi Wan tries to teach him stuff.

“Are you an Angel.” Smooooth kid. Smoooth, you’re gonna get with her. Despite her being way older than you. They couldn’t have just made him the same age as her?

Toydarians should be used for more things, especially involving force users.

Anakin. The slave. Is like “Here Qui Gon, you’ll like this food.” and he’s just like “Cheers” and pockets it for later. Dude. Try it.

I really hope they do go into more High Republic stuff next, give me a Destiny-type game where you play as a Jedi with your mates.

Quigons like “You must have Jedi reflexes to race pods” Then he catches Jar Jars tongue in a blink of an eye and Anakins like “You’re a Jedi Knight aren’t you?” And Qui-Gon is like “What makes you think that?” ...? .. You just fucking.. God damn it Qui-Gon.

Anakin: “No one can kill a Jedi”. Palpatine: “Hold my Blue milk.”

I feel like im becoming fluent in Gungan broken basic which is worrying.

Anakins mom whos name i’ve literally just forgot is like “He was meant to help you.” ... bitch.. what? Why does nobody question that?

WHY DOES JAR JARS MOUTH MOVE WITH OTHER PEOPLES LINES!? ... Darth Jar Jar. #PlagueisTheWiseWasAGungan. I mean not rly but seriously.. that would have been a really cool plot twist.

Jar Jar got numbed and got his hand stuck.. so like.. perhaps not.. otherwise you’re playing a little too dumb mate.

The look of worry from Shmi, good stuff.

The two Headed announcer speaking basic and Huttese is pretty smart like, the one doing one and the other doing the other.

What the fuck is Clegg Holdfast?

What the fuck are any of these races? Like.. where are these races throughout the rest of the franchise?

Crazy that lightly bending that one part of the podracer can fuck it up so bad.

Who the fuck is that other Hutt? Oh yeah I’m watching the like updated version with Geroge Lucas’ “Fixes” in it. Probably should have said that earlier.

I cant remember if this is true but I’m pretty sure Qui-Gon knows Padme is the Queen and is just fucking with her at this point.

Man Pod Racing is cool, fuck whoever says it isnt.

Gimmie an updated Pod Racing ps4 game.

What the fuck is that long thin alien thats selling food to the crowd? Gimmie a Jedi version of him.

Havent commented in a while because i just kept watching it tbh.

Coruscant looks cool. Still want more High Republic stuff.

What the fuck is that driver alien, he looks in pain to exist.

“There is no civility, there is only politics” The Chancellor code.

Is it too late to call a vote of no confidence on Palpatine?

I see you there in the background Yaddle. Get it girl.

Fuck me the added extra of this long neck ass Jedi Master is so distracting.

Where Jaro Tapal at tho?

You’d think after Padme’s like “Surprise bitch it’s me” moment coming up the Jedi would be like “Well shit.. maybe we’re less aware of things than we think... Yoda.. are you just a short human painted green?”

Amedala... So extra with these outfits. I get that she’s a Queen but Jesus.

Eyyyyyyyyyyyy it’s ET.

Qui-Gon is such a bad boy.

I kinda get why Jedi take kids when they’re really young, so they can’t remember their parents so they aren’t constantly worried about their parents and then fall to the dark side... doesn’t make it any nicer though.

My vote went to Bail Antilles.

To be fair not training Anakin could have been very bad. He could have like gone even more Darkside and Palpatine could swooped in and trained him himself completely.

Maul is barely in this but fuck is he still cool.

You know what I don’t hate Midichlorians. They’re just like atoms that stick to certain people and thats what gives them access to the force, it doens’t really change anything it’s just a scientific explination.

You know what.. During the middle of the film, Jar Jar keeps his mouth shut and just lets people get on with it, that’s alright.

How old is Obiwan supposed to be in this film?

A little more variation in these creepy ass gungans would be nice.

Damn the Viceroy and the other guy are huge or Maul is smol.

Love that Gungan dindgeridoo horn thing.

I also love the giant bubble shields.

Are they watching a Star Wars battle tactics pc game on that screen?

Fuck The Darth Maul fight is badass.

I don’t buy Anakin at all, he wants to fly out there and get involved, the little shit.

Quigon doesnt even flip when he jumps, he’s just like “I’m too old for this shit.”

Yeah R2 is like “Go back” and Anakins like “Naaa fuck that”... Tut tut. Boys gonna be trouble.

The way Maul stalks back and forth the other side of that barrier like a Sith Tiger.. Good shit.

Aaaaand Quigon is dead. RIP.

“Now This is Pod Racing.”.. It’s not though is it?

Nice to have something blow up and actually have debris instead of just all being gone completely.

Anddd there goes Maul to go get robot spider legs and then be found by his bro Savage.

Why do you wanna bring balance to the force anyway if it’s currently so one sided favouring the light side? Surely bringing balance is a bad thing at that point.

Yoda’s already soooo old.

Alright so they know there’s a Sith out there and the guy is still just like right next to them and they don’t know. Tut.

That Jedi behind Mace Windu at the end looks intimidating as shit.

Padme, he’s a kid, calm yourself down woman. You predator.

Alright.. Film done. 10/10 Best movie ever. Naa tbh I enjoy the prequels more than most, obviously if you’ve stuck with me this long you know that but it clearly has its flaws.. still.. I enjoyed it! Feel free to ask me my opinions on specific things if you want. Also shamelessly gonna plug my two star wars muses Cal and Savage here, rp with me you cowards. Also I’m down to star wars verse any of my other characters, literally any of them, i have ideas for all.

#ooc #dan watches #dan reacts

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ursoself-satisfying · 6 years ago

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All Things Must Pass

this was a request!!! hes so young here wow

Joe Mazzello x F!Reader, sad/comfort fluff

A/N: i have so little time to write this was a struggle,,, i projected a lot onto this fic, using the language i use when im in a negative headspace n such so i hope it doesnt thro anyone off,,, i went thru a lot of what i felt then wrote that cus i deal w mental health issues n tried to portray what i go thru in a semi-accurate way but not one so specific its not readable u kno??? y'all that peep my references here tho get bonus points

Warnings: none rly,,, its kinda vague n sad like dealing w not discussing whats wrong n such,,,,, nothing bad tho,, not even any language wow!!! jk one language wh00ps

The warm mug in your hand didn’t improve your mood. The steam of the drink drifted up from the contents and swirled in intricate patterns near your face. You pursed your chapped lips and blinked your drying eyes. A feeling had been swelling in you for days, but you couldn’t quite identify it yet. With soft blankets curled around you and your body folded up on the couch, you pondered it again. This wasn’t an unfamiliar experience. It had been happening for years. The bite of the sharp night air bled through a crack in your draping covers and you shivered, conserving your heat by pulling further into yourself. Though familiar, this state you were in was anything but comfortable. Even if you really were comfortable like this, you wouldn’t have wanted to admit it.

The kitchen light was the only thing shining through the apartment. It wasn’t your apartment, no. This wave had to come crashing down on you when you were far from the safety of your home. This apartment was safe It belonged to your boyfriend and he made you feel safe, but he wasn’t there right now. It was just you and the sound of minuscule little droplets of rain pattering against the window. The street lights made the storm seem like a glitter against the glass, reflecting back the business of the night.

You couldn’t remember the last time you felt like this, but you had to remember it was ok not to be ok sometimes. “We naturally go through emotional highs and lows, everyone does,” she told you, “it doesn’t mean you’re broken if you feel bad- it means you're human.” ‘Remeber that,’ you'd thought, ‘remember it’s ok. You’re ok.’

Your drink smelled sweet and a little burnt. You breathed in the warmth wafting from it before slowly and cautiously tipping the cup to your lips. A hiss escaped your lips at the still scalding temperature colliding with your raw skin and you sighed. Your love of the cold weather had betrayed you and left you weak. The entire situation was stressful and tiring, and you’d cry if you could but for some horrible reason you just couldn’t.

Your mind struggled to focus on one thing at a time that had led to your current emotions but it mostly focused on the bad. Your mind was foggy and muddled and insisted on making a mental list of all the reasons your life was the absolute worst in this very moment. ‘Perhaps,’ you reasoned, ‘if I identify what's wrong, I can fix it.’

You were far from home. New York City was scary and big and loud and dirty and new to you. This was exciting and terrifying at the same time. You wanted to see everything, and Joe wanted to show it all to you, but of course, he still had work things and you were left alone. You only had so much time there and even less time with him. There was never any way you could have fit in every important place you wanted to see into the few precious hours you could share.

That led into your second reason, which was that you just desperately missed Joe. He hadn’t wanted to leave you alone, but duty does call and he had to answer. “I love you, ok? I’m so sorry, I- I wish I could have planned for this but-”

“You couldn’t have known! It’s ok,” You’d smiled at him and he kissed you before he left. Every morning and every night and every time he had the chance, he kissed you. God, it gave you life. His face just seemed to fit into your so perfectly, like your hands were molded against his cheeks. You closed your eyes and could almost feel him there with you, his warmth keeping you sane, but when you opened your eyes, he was gone.

Maybe the third reason was that your relationship was fairly new and you were insecure in the commitment for a number of reasons- or maybe it’s just that the holiday season was upon you and that ‘seasonal depression’ was hitting you hard. There was so much to do, so much to not miss out on, and so little time to relax and actually enjoy this time of year. Joe hadn’t managed to decorate for anything yet and had actually planned to do so with you, but it didn’t look like you’d have the chance to now. There were no lights up anywhere, no festive knick-knacks up on the shelves, nothing.

‘Or maybe,’ you thought, ‘it’s not seasonal, it’s just me.’ This was a turning point and you were scared. Joe had never seen you in such a deep, naturally dark headspace before, and you had little explanation for it. There was no one thing you could blame for the way you felt. It was just- Everything. A vague yet overwhelming anxiety rolled through you that made your guts feel like they’d turned to sawdust and were swirling around inside you like you were the floor of some horrible workshop.

The lighter side of your mind spoke up, ‘Maybe that’s not such a bad comparison, I mean, you are a workshop, always tinkering, changing, evolving. You are a human bent on self-improvement. Recovery,’ the voice reminded, ‘is not linear.’

“But any step forward is a good step,” you said out loud.

“What’s that from?”

“Holy fuckin’ sh-!” Your entire body jolted violently at the surprise of the response and your drink sloshed over the sides of your mug, spilling all over your blanket. Thankfully, it was no longer hot. “God, what a- what a waste of a good cup of-” Your curses trailed off into angry murmurs and you stood before looking over at Joe standing in the entryway looking equally as startled.

He’d just come back from a meeting with a potential director for an upcoming film to be met with his girlfriend completely spaced out on the couch. She’d been sitting there for several minutes without knowing he’d come in. When he spoke and surprised her, he jumped nearly as much as she did. He went over to help her clean up the spilled drink with a soft, sorry expression. She’d already gotten up, though, and shuffled to the kitchen without really acknowledging him. Something about the situation made Joe feel sick and guilty. “I’m so sorry. I, uh,” he paused and breathed a laugh as he picked up a pillow slipping off the couch and looked at the form that had moved into the kitchen, placing the empty cup on the counter with a soft click of ceramic against marble.

His breath hitched and he forgot whatever it was he’d intended to say to her. She was cast in odd shadows from the lights of the streetlamps inside combatting with the yellow glow of from above the stove. The scene carried none of the normally blissfull air his lover had. It was sharp and contrasting, like the set of an old expressionist film. He thought she would look fit beside the likes of Nosferatu, her in her cloak of covers and tussled hair barely emerging from the makeshift hood that supported her neck. The way she’d cocooned herself reminded him of a lost child standing alone in the cold, one no passing stranger would stop to notice.

It was silent for a moment as the actor continued absorbing her aura. The cars driving about in the rain echoed through the building. The sounds of splashing through puddles and revving engines drifted by his ears. [Y/N] stared at the sink before slowly meeting her boyfriend’s gaze. They just looked at each other. Joe felt like he wasn’t even there though like she didn’t see him there. She stared through him with the same disassociated look she had when he’d walked in. His shoes suddenly became of great interest to him and dragged his attention from her to the grain of the floor. “I’m,” he gulped and raised his eyebrows in a mixture of guilt and concern, “I’m so sorry I couldn’t be here with you today.” He looked at her again and she finally seemed to notice him standing there.

His sad puppy dog eyes bore you down. You’d fallen so hard for them. Before you’d even learned his name, you knew him by his eyes. You forced yourself to process what he’d said and were quickly overcome with guilt of your own. “Oh- Oh, no! Joe,” you pleaded and sighed as you rushed to him with a sympathetic smile, “I’m sorry, I just, like, spaced out- I’m fine, it’s all fine.” You nodded lightly at him with a stretched smile and looked up at him with hands gently placed on his chest, holding tightly to the coat he’d yet to remove.

“I know you have to work and I could never-” You bit your lip as your mental search for words was shown through the frantic lines your eyes traced, “I never want to be an obstacle.” With a softened gaze, pleading for ease in the oddly uncomfortable situation, you continued, “I’m pretty sure I’m always gonna love you, and I’ll be here,” his mouth parted as you paused, “just for you. No matter how many dates you miss, as long as you’re doing your best.” A pitiful chuckle fell from your lips.

So early in your relationship, you weren’t sure when an appropriate time to address your current emotional state would present itself. Then again, is any time a good time to discuss something like this? You felt he deserved an explanation, at the very least, to ease him a bit from the stiff form he kept since he’d returned that night. ‘Where to begin’, you wondered. Before you could let another sad syllable drip from your clenched teeth, jaw tight in distracted thought, arms wrapped around you and a bristly cheek pressed against your own.

“This is weird.” He whispered, “Why are we weird right now?” The blankets around were nuzzled out of the way so he could bury his face in the crook of your neck. His nose pressed hard against your hot skin. You were unprepared for the contact. All you could focus on was his heavy breathing beside your ear, every exhale slipping down your back and making you shiver. Cautious hands danced up the back of his neck, barely touching the airs that stood on end from the undefinable energy surging between the two of you. Molding yourself to fit perfectly in the empty cavities of space left, you were flush against him, clinging to the back of his head and letting his arms shift under yours to support you.

“I’m bad right now.” Your voice was almost a whimper, choking you on it’s way out. It wasn’t even your voice, the words were breaths you let out at all once. Joe- You weren’t sure he understood, and you didn’t expect him to immediately. He has no context yet, no reference besides what you’d carefully revealed to him. It was never your intention to hide any of your traits or symptoms or past from him, or most anyone, really, but it wasn’t exactly a hot topic of conversation.

He’d remembered briefly her using the phrase ‘when I was bad’ once or twice when referring to her mental and emotional state, but she didn’t often talk about it. Either it was sensitive or simply private, but it was fine. He didn’t push. The last thing he wanted was to make her uncomfortable or drive her away. While respecting her privacy and her past, he still swelled with concern at the thought of not knowing. It was a loving kind of fear that filled his stomach when he’d imagined moments like this; moments where something was wrong, something was off and he was in the dark. He didn’t need a reason to love and support her, but he was unsure of how to help in the best way.

“Bad emotionally,” she started in barely a whisper, though it was louder than before, “not ‘bad’ like-” There was a hot huff of air with a small laugh behind it and [Y/N] sniffled, “not ‘bad’ like- like ‘I’ve been bad, officer’- not in a sexual way-” It was punctuated with a cottony laugh.

Joe shook his head softly and gave the girl in his arms a squeeze. His smile was wide, though she couldn’t see it. Her squeak made him laugh a little and he could feel the air around them suddenly lose about five pounds. It was easier to lift his shoulders in this new situation.

After a moment of breathing in sync, cars passing by, and rain beating rhythmically against the windows, the man broke the silence. “You don’t have to say anything-”

“You know I can’t do that, Joe.” He held onto her for a moment longer then pulled only his head back slightly to kiss her turned cheek while she was still in his embrace. In the warm kitchen light, the patterns of the blanket and the shadows of the passing headlight combined like brushstrokes on the scene and turned them into the likeness of a Klimt painting. Yellow cascading down their backs and an iconic arching connection made this art.

“If you’re bad, then let's make it better.” The words were pressed into her skin by his plush lips. Before pulling away, their hands found one another’s and gripped them tightly, like he was a rope and she was dangling over the ever looming pit of her past.

For the first time, she could feel a wetness pricking at her eyes. Without effort or dismay, she could cry. There were no sobs to accompany it, just silent streaming tears. She didn’t stop them for they were a gift. The damp streaks beneath each eye bent around her growing grin as she looked up at her lover through the filter of emotional release. Everything but the earthy brown around his pupils was a watery mess in her eyes. ‘God,’ she thought, ‘This- He is a good one. He is so- He is so beautiful.’

Joe could feel the pain in his chest as his heart shook, threatening to crack at the image of his love in such a fragile form. “Let’s just-” He could have claimed the rest of the sentence got stuck in his throat but the truth is there was nothing there to get stuck, nothing to follow what he’d started saying. “Is it ok if we just,” he took a deep breath, “be together? Would that- Would that help?”

“You already help. Being here helps.” Her voice was back now, though, physically, she didn’t look in any way improved.

Joe handled his girlfriend gently and urged her to the couch with him, pulling down onto his lap so they both laid on the piece of furniture long ways. Her bundled body blanketed his and he leaned back, letting her warm him. Struggling to slip off his coat as he kicked off his shoes, Joe also snaked his arm into a pocket to retrieve his phone. He pulled it out with a small noise of pride and held it out in front of him. “A little George Harrison makes everything better, right?” There was a sleepy hum of agreement and ‘My Sweet Lord’ played softly from the speaker of his device. He nestled into [Y/N]’s and closed his eyes. He held the phone in his hands, clasped together as his arms wrapped around the woman.

The ‘hallelujahs’ seemed in time with the weather outside as the couple drifted further from the present and into their own billowing comfort. The lights still were yellow outside, as they were inside, and the cars didn’t stop speeding through the puddles. Though you doubted the return of these feelings would stop, for now, you were content. Joe was there with you and it somehow, just his presence, made some of the sadness wash away. He was like a rain on your pity parade, saving you from any continued celebration of your own inabilities. Tomorrow, there might be explanations needed, but tonight you felt blessed. He was safe. He was warm. Your mind wasn’t racing and your eyes weren’t dry. This was better than anything you’d been feeling, anything swelling inside you the past few days. This wasn’t an unfamiliar experience, and you’d hoped it would never become one.

Glancing up at the man beneath you one last time, you smiled genuinely, bliss settling in your center, and you closed your eyes. George Harrison lulled you to sleep that night, and safely asleep you fell, holding tightly to Joe through it all, just as tightly as he held you.

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nulfaga · 6 years ago

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🖊+badr!!!!!!!!!

sorry this doesnt count as a gush by any stretch of the imagination...ive been mulling over what to say jlkfhkfdg this isnt gonna be abt badr specifically but just a bunch of badr-adjacent things ive had on my mind

ive been trying to avoid deadfire spoilers until march when i can (FINALLY) get the game but i DO know you become the captain(?) of a ship and that there’s sea shanties and that is literally.... SUCH a fun thought to me like i just smile like a dope whenever i think about it

Like...kana would make THE best shantyman?? maia even says he has a “voice like a powder keg” and she didnt mean it as a compliment but still!! I think even when badr had his voice it would have been a bit too gentle/classically trained to be any good but he’d still be lovely in the choruses...not that it matters now lol

and yeah, it’s a terrible shitty thing to have sung for most of your life and then to be surrounded by singing people KNOWING you can’t join in, but for badr theres a different kind of joy altogether in hearing kana change the “her” in faithful sailor boy to a “him” bc he’s the shantyman and he can do that...and then proceeding to make horrible, cheesy eye contact the entire time...or having maia just BURST into a verse of haul away and go and roast kana with that “YOU CALL YOURSELF A SECOND MATE, YE CANNY TIE A BOWLINE” line and everyone just loses their collective shit laughing (badr included!) while kana has to pretend really hard to be offended....its a good vibe i think

re: other badr things ive been thinking about...im not sure what class to pick for him now... bc i had him as a priest at first, mostly bc ew durance, and a lot of his backstory like incidentally sprung from that, but i think if anything he’s a combat-focused chanter....now without the ability to sing....so he has to rush and compromise for that by calling on ondra (and later eothas)

but the THING IS is that i KNOW eothas does some fuck shit in deadfire and that theres some weird thing surrounding the godlikes so that is definitely gunna factor into his whole “faith as a source of power thing” in a way thats probably gonna suck. honestly im thinking maybe the best explanation is he takes up a weapon specialization in between poe1 and deadfire because otherwise the Badr Lore(tm) would literally just support him being incompetent :/ (omg maybe kana teaches him to use one of those awful ole timey pistols pfft)

but yeah i just feel really bad in a way but i also think its immensely fucking funny cus my entire process of establishing badrs character has just been to go “oh shit...oh SHIT” for every new piece of plot i discover because me creating a moon godlike chanter-turned-priest of ondra and/or eothas is so abjectly horrific considering everything you learn about ondra and eothas and godlikes and the fact that theres so much singing in deadfire and badr just. cant take part in any of that? it feels like a conspiracy by the universe to just do him in the worst way possible and obviously i feel bad but it’s also just amusing how that worked out dghkjfgjldh

#badr #IM SORRY THIS IS NOT ONLY LATE BUT INCOHERENT #god-delusion

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yiulee999 · 7 years ago

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opm time traveler au (spoilers)

genos goes back in time and tries to disguise himself and befriending sai as a bookworm lol and they become good friends until sai is fooling around and playfully steals genos’ glasses one day and the you know 💘 💘 💘 💘

what started out as a random doodle turned into a multi-chapter length fic draft out on discord!! *o*

the full convo/story is posted below bUT its heavy angst!! be warned!! sorry about the casual lingo, i was posting in chat format XD

so time traveler au picks up from when sai was getting picked on back in middle school chapter in the manga

and when genos goes back in time he thinks the only way he can get close to saitama if he was an ‘outcast’ too

so he purposefully nerdifies himself more? lOL how is possible,,,

Originally genos got sent back by dr. Genus as way to figure out the key to sai’s strength

Bc in the ‘future’ genos, they had just met and genos just wanted to know what made sai powerful

And initially when they meet genos is very forward about wanting to know all about saitama who finds it kinda creepy and stalkerish when he finds genos tailing him in the hallways and after school haha

And other classmates notice how the new kid (genos) follows/takes an interest in the class loser (sai) so predictably they start making fun of and bullying genos too

Genos, true to form, doesnt give a fuck xD

But sai has mixed feelings about it bc it was the first time someone took an actual interest in him and even though he’s so forward, genos never overstepped boundaries with him and was an okay guy overallBut alot of the story has to do with sai trying to figure out what its like to have a friend

And what to do because hes never had one

But he does know that he doesnt like seeing genos getting pushed around or made fun of so there are moments where he’ll try to stick up for him by telling them to knock it off or pulling genos aside to a differnt hallway when he sees the bullies coming

At the same time hes so confused on like what to do right, so he’ll also try to push genos away, ‘maybe if he didn’t hang around me so much, he’ll won’t get picked on…’

There was one scene i knew i wanted to do

Where after sai stands up for genos, the bullies treat sai worse

So it was an after school thing, behind one of the school buildings where sai is beat up pretty bad (like barely standing) and the bully has him by the front of his shirt and had his fist pulled back

When genos arrives

Before, sai had managed to ditch genos so he wouldnt see sai when he’s ‘weak’And always made up some excuse when he bruises or other injuries

So genos interrupts the scene by straight up grabbing the bullies wrist

And seething in all toasty righteous fury ‘dont touch him!’

and sai cant see it cus he had two black eyes at this point

but this was some dialogue i had written:

S:’What’s he doing? Why is he helping me?‘ "Hey–“

Bully pulls back fist "Look, kid. You’re new so I’ll give you a free pass this time if you walk away right now. You wouldn’t want us to mess up that pretty face of yours, would you?"

G: "How generous of you. Unfortunately, I won’t be extending the same courtesy to anyone who treats this person disrespectfully. Especially not ugly trash like you. "

Bully: "Why you–!! ”

And when the bully tries to redirect the hit to genos, genos instinctively throws out his palm and says ‘incin—‘ before he realizes he doesnt have his cannons

And genos is about to get b e a t

When sai wrenches himself from the bullies grip and takes the hit for him

They like tumble down and genos is confused to what happened before he sees sai lying motionless beside him, bleeding from his head and unresponsive

And i was gonna end a chapter there with genos screaming saitama’s name…

Next chapter was gonna be sai waking up slowly and in a world of hurt

He realizes he’s in the nurses office

It was night time

And when could finally see, he hallucinates seeing like 8 mini genos (remember the genosbots :3)‘Why…whys there eight of you/??’

So basically genos is worry over him so much whereas sai says its fine but genos is like feeling really bad so sai shakily reaches over and gently taps him on the forehead

And grins weakly, ‘there, now we’re even.’

Genos is crying openly bc he’s remembering when future saitama playfully hit his head after a spar and he thinks that saitama-sensei is strong no matter how old he is

And he’s just…overwhelmed by how kind and strong saitama is, even when he has no strength at all (Cus hes like 14 rn haha)

I think a couple days pass, and genos and saitama are eating lunch on the roof (cue bento box scene lol)

Sai is healing nicely, genos is still feeling bad whenever he looks over an sees the bandage on sais head

Some dialogue:

Eating lunch on the roof. G: How’s your wound? S: Hm? Oh, it’s fine. Don’t worry, my teachers say I have a hard head. G: I’m sorry. S: ? Why are you sorry? Not like you’re the one who punched me. G: I made things worse. If I hadn’t antagonized him, then–!! S: Then he woulda beat me up anyway. Seriously, man, it’s not your fault, okay? So you can stop doing all those things for me. G: Like what? S: You know! Like being nice to me and buying lunch and stuff. You don’t need to feel guilty about it anymore.

Sai is still kinda insecure abt having a genuine friend, so he still thinks genos is being nice to him out of pity or smtg, (and genos had been particularly nice to him after he got injured so he figured it was out of guilt)

And i mean….it was,, genos feels terribly guilty…but i think watching sai, who was powerless, attempt to protect him just made him more intrigued (and unbeknownst to him fall a lot deeper in love XD)

But genos says thats not why he does those things

That saitama reminded him of ‘someone’ he knew whom he admired greatly

At his ‘old’ school

He tells sai about his ‘sensei’ and how amazing this person was and all of his great qualities

And sai was feeling a little more depressed at each praise genos was singing about this person (coughjealouscough)

And i have another piece of dialogue here…

S: if you like him so much, why did you leave? G: …I wanted to see the kind of person sensei was before he became strong. this is where he grew up. S: …seems like a lot of effort just for one person. G:.that person (sai thoughts: he’s still talking?)…no matter what i did..I couldn’t reach him. I’d do anything to close the distance between us..I thought that if I came here, I would be able to understand him. I thought I could help him. G: touches saitama’s wound But instead, I’m still the one being saved. I never learn.

And genos gives sai this painfully heartfelt smile and its full of regret, frustration, self-loathing, admiration, and some other unidentified emotion that just floors saitama

Saitama sees genos’ smile and his eyes and is just...stunned by the level of vulnerability he sees (he’s never gotten close enough to anyone before to see it)

So he reaches out, hestitantly at first, before wiping away genos’ tears carefully because if he touches any harder he’s afraid genos would crumble

S: “i dont really get it...but if you feel that strongly, then i’m sure some part of your feelings reached him.”

And they share their first hug then :3

////

((When i wrote this, genos didnt have glasses haha so i guess that scene where sai realizes how pretty genos is would go before this one))

I guess if the glasses were involved, sai would be torn between wanting genos to take them off (so he can see his eyes which oddly finds that he likes them...alot.) and keep them on so other ppl wont see how pretty he is

Bc sure if they saw, genos would no longer be his friend

He would have so many ppl vying for his attn, he would be surrounded by girls and guys and would be approachableAnd saitama would get left behind

But i think even tho sai wants to be selfish and keep genos to himself, he also realizes that genos wouldnt be bullied if he were more accepted

So he would encourage genos to ditch the glasses and genos would end up getting accepted by everyone but he would still stay with saitama and nothing would change between them other than saitama getting really red at random times and avoiding eye contact more

It would just be one of the many things that strengthen their relationship as friends. And i think i had planned some stuff where they do a bunch of typical friend / kid stuff

Like genos tutoring saitama on math, genos running circles around sai in track/field (‘wtf...huff are...huff you?! huff some...kinda...rOBOT!?). Them going to the arcade, saitama taking genos around to explore his hometown, they go on hiking trips and stuff.

genos finding out saitama lived alone and that’s why he always buys lunch (or doesnt eat if he got bullied out of it that day) and talking out their issues and genos reaching out and saying yeah, he knew what it felt like to be alone

but that saitama should never feel that way because he wasn’t alone anymore, and saitama joking affectionately ‘yeah i have you to stick annoyingly close.’

and also heavy scenes like when you have to fill out future goals sheets in school where sai shyly admits that he’s always thought it’d be nice to be a hero and was shocked when genos was oVERWHELMINGLY supportive bc he’s never had anyone cheer for him like this, believe in him like genos does. And he calls genos crazy for agreeing with him, but he thinks he must also be crazy because when genos looks at him like that, he feels like he could do it

and its one of the first moments we see sai really open up to genos

bc being a hero was something he truly cared about

but his teachers, his classmates, heck the world, didn’t think he could do, they thought it was a hopeless dream for someone, and he’s so used to facing this kind of rejection that he’s started to believe it really would be impossible for someone like him....

but all it took was this one person, this one friend to tell him he could...and it made him feel invincible

and its probably the scene where saitama realizes how important genos is to him.

So of fucking course its when saitama realizes genos is important to him that drama bomb hits Basically, Dr. genus comes and pays genos a surprise visit. And hes like “did you forget the reason I sent you back here? Any updates?”

And genos is like “i have nothing of interest to report”

genus: "This isn’t some children’s game, you know. "

genos: "I must be careful not to expose myself. Saitama-sensei is more observant than I had initially planned--"

genus: "You’re stalling. I have an idea: Fight him. "

genos: !!! dr : "You’ll have a disguise. I will re-install your blasters. Perhaps a stressful situation will trigger a transformatio--. "

((so it was gonna be hinted at that even though genos appeared like a normal human, he was just redesigned by genus and was actually still a cyborg) genos: "I refuse to put Saitama-sensei in danger!!"

dr: "What danger? He is more than capable of--"

genos: "Right now, he is powerless. An attack could kill him--!"

dr: " And doing nothing will kill us!! Your mission is to find out the secret to his strength! Something we both wanted to discover and the entire reason why I chose you as my test subject! I will not sit here idly while you indulge in your childish fantasies that will get us both erased from the timestream. Look. " //he shows genos a pic of the hero registery from their time//

genos: " !!! Sensei’s name is missing!”

dr: " Your name is gone too. I dont know what you did but your actions are interfering with the future. Here. Collect your belongings and leave no evidence behind. We depart in 1 hour. "

genos: " !! Wait! Give me more time!! I understand now..!"

//genos has a bunch of flashbacks of when he does fun stuff with saitama. When sai tries to make him something in cooking class (and fails badly lol). When saitama shares his manga with genos. When they watch anime together.//

Genos: “I understand now..what type of person sensei was...his strength (when sai was protecting him from bullies)...his kindness (sai wiping his tears away)...his warmth (sai hugging him*)...!!”

“I finally understand...!!”

sai holding his hand, sai smiling and eating with him..

“...what its like to feel human again!!!”

He’s suddenly lifted off the ground and pushed roughly against the wall. Dr. Genus has him by the collar.

“Reality check, little shit!! You. Do. Not. Belong. Here! You’ve been playing pretend for far too long! And guess what demon cyborg?”

He tosses genos to the ground

“Time’s run out”

So chapter was gonna end with genos’ hand slowly fading in and out

next chapter would begin with genos being given 2 hours by dr. Genus to basically pack his shit and go. bc they cant leave any trace of the future stuff when they leave So genos ends up back in the classroom Packing his cute stationary and shit xD

(That sai bought him o b v i o u s l y )

And he’s startled by the door sliding open

And saitama walks in

He’s suprised to see genos there (and looking guilty?) “did ya forget smtg?”

And genos just kinda..looks away

And sai sees him packing up and taking everything and hes quiet for a bit ...

“You’re leaving?” He asks softly

“Saitama-kun, I—!”

“Why?” He keeps talking in that soft tone, but it silences genos more effectively than a shout

“I..I can’t...”

S: “...Is it because of that person?”

(Sai remembers the shine in genos eyes when he talks about his ‘sensei’, his special person, and his heart kinda just falls to his feet)

(i never had a chance, did i...)

Genos cant answer because yeah it was because of saitama in the future. So what if genos disappeared? Genos didn’t care. But the world needed saitama. It needed Saitama The Hero. He had to leave now so saitama can exist in the future

But since he cant say anything, for fear or changing the future even more, genos just doesnt say anything

So sai assumes that yeah, it was because of someone else, someone better than him, someone who deserved genos’ admiration and loyalty

He doesnt say anything, just approaches genos slowly, trying not to startle genos who has like deer in head lights ready-to-b o l t

And saitama rests his forehead on genos’ shoulder, barely touching him but close enough that genos cant ignore him, genos can feel his presence and his warmth

And theres a moment where genos is t o r n

Bc this saitama acknowledges him in a way that future sai wouldnt. This saitama looks at him and sees him whereas his sensei’s gaze passes over him to focus on the sale sign

And genos has been in school again, and he realizes he missed it. He missed having his worries be about being late for class, missing a school assignment, whether he could sit next saitama next class, what to pack for his and sai’s lunch tomorrow

And he knew in the back of his mind, that his real self, was in surgery at this time, trading warmth for fire and destruction, shedding his humanity while his future self was regaining it in the past,Thanks to saitama

He inhales sharply, ‘sai—‘ S: “don’t go.”

G: !

(Sai thought genos was going to say he was going to leave and he didn’t think he could hear him say it) S: “I know..he’s precious to you...” He reaches for genos, and after hesitating over touching genos’ hand, he settles for gripping genos’ sleeve of his school uniform tightly S: “but you’re precious to me “

And genos has tears streaming down his face. Because he wanted to stay, he had never wanted anything so much before than to just stay with saitama before he became sensei, to cheer for him when no one else would, to stop him from reaching the point he had trade his emotions for his strength, to stop the emptiness before it could touch him

But he also knew...that in order for his sensei to become strong...saitama needed to have these struggles that pushed him to change

That success without sacrifice was impossible, and he knew, genos KNEW it in his soul that if he stayed...if HE was the factor that caused saitama to limit himself, to fall back on a regular life when genos had seen it with his own eyes that this was a man destined for greater things...he would never be able to forgive himself

Genos throws his arms around saitama and hugs him tightly. He feels like he’s floating with nothing to ground him than the feeling of saitama returning his embrace equally tightly with his still lanky arms

G: “Saitama-kun....Thank you.”

G: “...goodbye.”

So next chapter begins ...With genos ending up back in genus’ lab

G: “Are we back?”

dr: “It appears so. We should—hey!! Where are you going?”

And genos is running off to look for saitama/his SENSEI because he had to exist, he had to still be a hero, right?!

He bumps into a monster

But not just any monster...Its the mosquito girl XD

Genos fights MG because its what he’s supposed to do, but he’s not scared for the fight...he’s scared for what’s to come AFTER...

And saitama shows up and finishes off MG with wan punch!!!

Genos is thankfully, not in disrepair bc he managed to dodge her attacks and was basically stalling for time

Saitama kinda sees him and looks at him blandly but to genos, that garrish, eye-burning yellow hero suit was the best thing he had ever seen

S: “Oh. A civilian? Are you oka—“

And he freezes all of a sudden.

And genos also freezes bc he doesn’t know what to do Its saitama-sensei...he should know the script, he’s done it all before

But now saitama-sensei was the stranger and he longed for the comfort that came with saitama-kun’s toothy smile

But he too had changed....he was a cyborg now, weaponized arms and black sclera on full display. His core spun dangerously. Would saitama even recognize him? Would he remember that day in the classroom when they parted ways, that was only a few hours ago for genos but more than a decade for saitama?

Genos froze. Would saitama even want to remember? After all the heartbreak genos had caused him?

Lost in his thoughts, genos almost didn’t notice saitama approach until the soft crunch of asphalt right in front of him jarred him to reality

Genos held his breath

Saitama didnt say anything. Only let that sharp gaze pierce genos in ways no monster could.

Genos couldnt read what he was thinking, he never could on his sensei’s bland face but this time, there was something tightly guarded in those brown eyes.

Saitama muttered something so low that genos had to use his advanced hearing to pickup

S: “It cant be...”

Louder and taking an aggressive step forward, saitama clenched his hand into a fist. He narrowed his eyes. “...If you’re some kinda shape-shifting monster...this won’t end well for you.”

G: “It’s genos!! I’m...I’m genos.”

Saitama freezes and his eyes grow wide. Genos almost instinctively lurches foward when saitama falls back on his heels, appearing shaken.

S: ...genos?

Genos nods tentatively.

For a moment, saitama doesnt say anything. But genos finds he doesnt need to. Those brown eyes had opened and genos could see, could feel some far-flung emotions creep back into that achingly familiar face as saitama let his gaze trail from his new eyes down his circuited arms and linger on the glowing blue that peeked through his shirt

After what felt like years, genos saw a corner of saitama’s lips twitch.

S: “It really is you....Heh. You haven’t changed a bit.”

G: “Sai—“

S: "I tried to forget you. I tried to go back to life before you. I finished school .... somehow got a job as a shitty salesman..."

S: "...I really tried."

Genos looked down, ashamed. He had been the one to injure saitama so unforgivably. He couldn’t imagine what it would be like if saitama had done the same to him, if he had turned genos away from being his disciple. Kicked him out. How could you forgive someone who changed your world for the better, only to leave it behind?

More than anything, he needed to beg for forgiveness, not that he deserved it—but saitama did.

G: “Saitama, I—“

Sai shook his head, like he didn’t want to hear it.

Genos thought his core would crack.

S: “I thought...If I were strong, things would get better. If I were stronger than that person..maybe you would have picked me instead.”

S: “Maybe you would have stayed “

S: “I trained and trained until I became strong...but it wasn’t enough. To capture your attention, I had to be the strongest.” Saitama pauses and shoots him a small, cheeky grin that had echoes of the same toothy smile Genos cherished.

S: “I would have to be, to take care of someone as high maintenance as you.”

Then the smile faded. S: “But even after I became strong..what did it matter? You had left and I didn’t know if I would ever see you again. And if for some crazy reason i Did meet you again...I didn’t know if i had it in me to ask you to choose again..”

G: (full on oil tears, the whole shebang)

G: S-Saitama..!!

Saitama grinned helplessly at him.

S: “So hurry up and choose me, genos!”

G: “Sensei!!!” [ because I had already chosen you a long time ago ]

They hug.

THE END!!!!!!!!!!! :’D

There’s a small epilogue where sai’s like..you called me teacher again. Im still not a teacher you know (in reference to this original post: http://yiulee.tumblr.com/post/139194391025/time-travel-au ) .

And genos is like: dont worry sensei, ill explain it to you

And sai is like ah, okay? But first. surprise smooch! S: been waiting 12 years to do that :D

/////

endless thanks to @konorai @batneko @egg-in-the-basket for bearing with me while i unloaded this beast into the discord chat..yall the real mvps!!! ;3;

#saigenos #opm #saitama #genos #time travel au #my writing #opm time travel au #i was right #im never finishing this LOL OTL #but!!#i hope you guys still enjoy the story outline! :D #the key scenes i wanted to write/draw are still included so im sated :>#yiulee art #opm art

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huangfilms · 6 years ago

Text

Barista!Johnny

summary: i come to this cafe often and by often i mean pretty much everyday and i know all the workers except for you cause youre new and oh youre really handsome

requested by: @sofiafabulousphan (thank u love!!)

(A/N) in all honesty,,, i dont really know how johnny would b as a barista but lets see!!! also!!! thank u so much for requesting this!!! i hope this is what youve asked for and im s o r r y if it isnt as good as youd like it to be!! but anyway !! pls send some feedback and i hope you enjoy! thank you for waiting patiently!! (also excuse my summary I Don’t Even Know Anymore) (ps, she wasn’t edited)

hm hm hm hm

where to start Ladies,,, idk where to start!! okay anyway

so you always go into this Specific cafe

like all times of the day, every day

but not twice in one day u kno???

and so u obvi know all of the workers if you go there All Of The Time

and one day you walk in while getting out your wallet

and when u look up ur all like: That’s Not Ten

but its this guy,, a really tall one too,,, and hes--

hes pretty cute--

and then without any thought you blurt out, ‘are you a new worker?’

and then u snap your mouth shut because,,,, LMAO SIS

but all he does is greet you with a smile and he shyly says yes,,, omg uwu

ad then hes just like ‘what can i get you?’ and hes s o cheery omg its adorable skfdskdjf

barista!johnny?? more like abby uwus her way through this headcannon

and so you just say your order and hes just smiling the whole time and at one point he looks up at you and then he turns red and then he asks for a name

and you say, OH right its y/n

and he just says ‘pretty name for a pretty person’

speechless is what u are LMAOOO

and hes just casually entering your order in like he didnt j u s t say that

‘your total is $3.97 please’

you just like come back to reality cause you were still speechless

and so u give him like a $5 dollar bill or whatever and tell him to keep the change and then u leave

u sit down and u Think About That for a lil

okay but johnny would be the kind of person to bring your drink to you if the customer sat down cause he doesnt want to inconvenience them

LIKE HE DOESNT WANT THEM TO STAND UP AND THEN SIT AGAIN A WHOLE SWEETHEART

so he brings your drink to you and then you get startled Cause That Has Never Happened Before

and ur just— wow i Love This Song Cafe

and so you hang around for a bit and ogle the cutie barista and u text ur bestie like: AYO B!!! I JUST MET THE CUTEST BIH EVER !!!

and you’re just tapping rapidly on your phone johnny is just questioning and wondering if you’re okay HAHAHA

then u feel that its time to go and hope that tomorrow u see him again

u see him sooner than you thought you would

cause you go out after you’ve left the cafe and it’s like what,,,, 10 PM???

and you see johnny in your apartment complex

and he lives in the same floor as you,,,

and you know this cause u arrived on the floor as he was unlocking his apartment

u kno what u did? you mf ZOOTED

ur pretty sure he didnt see you but he did

and so you wait like five seconds and before you go to your home

anyway!! you go into ur home and ur Surprised cause wow,,, the cute new barista lives a few doors away from you,,, wtf,,,,,

and u just sleep on it cause youre Too Tired u have morning classes s o

time skip to the next day!! you wake up bright and early ready to get ur coffee fix

so you just get ready and youre dreading the day caus e your bed??? comf y

when you leave your apartment, coincidentally johnny does too!! your heart !! soaring because he remembers your name!!!

‘oh y/n! i didnt know you lived here!!’ and hes just his happy self and youre wondering how he can be this happy this early in the morning

and you can’t talk,,,,,u just can’t for some reason so u just awkwardly wave at him

and then when you d o speak its like five minutes after u guys just starring at each other

‘are you headed to work? cause im on my way there to get some coffee and was wondering if you wanted to walk together?’ AND U INTERNALLY SCREAM CAUSE

where did that come from big OOF

johnny doesnt mind,,, hes just smiling and he nods at you and he gestures for you to leave first

and so u guys are in the elevator and you guys talk amongst urselves

while walking to the cafe you guys are just chatting away and laughing and getting to know each other

you guys arrive at the place and johnny opens the door for you GENTLEMAN I AM T E L L I N G YOU

and he changes quickly so he can input your order since he r emembers

and this time you wanted a cute lil mug so u can just hang around for a while

and when johnny calls you up,,, it has a heart drawn in there!! cute??? wtfdfhlsak

johnny really out here being such a cutie 👏🏼

so time skip !! few months

u and johnny always leave ur apartments at the same time and u guys walk to the cafe

he ALWAYS draws the heart in ur coffee

and you guys become : SO CLOSE LIKE U GUYS ARE BASICALLY ATTACHED AT THE HIP

people r always saying and asking if u guys are a thing and ur always blush cause PFfTTt no???

we r just friends ok sweetie keep telling urself that!

theyre always telling you ‘do u see how he looks at u!!! ur so lucky to have a mans like that!!’ and ur stuttering like

o-oh no!! we r jJUstTtT FRIENDS— but its too late to change their judgement cause they lef t

LMAOOO

and so u start to wonder if johnny likes u like that cause honestly??? u like him like that

whats there not to like???????? a whole Man

but u dont wanna tell him that cause it will probably!! ruin ur friendship!!!

CAUSE WHAT IF HE DONT LIKE U LIKE THAT!! sis just ask him and Go Home

so u keep to urself but u act normal cause ignoring him would succ so u dont do that

and the rest of the day youre in calss, you just think about johnny and your feelings that u caught

googles: how to uncatch feelings

anyway

johnny notices that you’ve been acting just a tad bit weird, like you’re always nervous or something which u r ahhahdhsjd

and then he questions u abt it during his break when u visit after classes

‘me?? actin g weird??? hahahdhjsjs’

and johnny is just skeptical but he has a surprise for u so he doesn’t pry or anything

‘well ok,,, but if you aren’t busy, you wanna go to the park with me tonight?’

‘UhHHhH sure! what time??’

‘i’ll meet you back at your apartment at 6 tonight!! bye y/n!’

and ur just like haha what happened??

but you wave him goodbye and then go home cause it’s like 4:30

and u just chill for a bit and then decide you should get ready

when its 6, johnny knocks right as the clock turns and you get Nervous

but you suck it up and then open the door!!! and there he is!! why is he so cute uwu

so then you both walk to the park and when you arrive he tells u to close ur eyes

and then u just freeze cause Why Tho

but u do it anyway cause!! it’s johnny ur bestie so u don’t really question it

you can feel his hands go to your waist to guide you and you just Blush Tomato Red and pray that he can’t see u

he does but he doesnt say anything

and when you tells you to open your eyes

you see all of these fairy lights and little paper hearts all hung up on this Big Tree

where did u get the outlet johnny this place is like in the middle of the park

and ur sqeualing because!! this for you??????

and you look at him and he’s so Shy wow cu te i--

johnny just says that he likes u a lot but he’s noticed you acting a little weird so he just says that if u don’t like him that way then its fine and that he understands and then goes into this long rant--

but then u kiss his cheek and then he shuts up

‘i like you too, johnny, i think i have for a while now’

and you’re both grinning and johnny whips out this picnic basket from behind the tree and you guys are just star gazing

and when it’s time to go home, you guys are just giggling the whole time and holding hands

this is So Soft i feel So Soft

and so next day!! you guys leave ur apartments at the same time again

and johnny is just grinning at you and you have the Hugest smile on your face

and you guys walk hand in hand to the cafe

when you two walk in, ten is shouting ’Freaking Finally!!! im pretty sure everyone was sick of watching u two pine’

johnny draws not one, but TWO hearts in ur coffee!!

and life is good

johnny: a whole Man give him love

send him love everyone

but anyway!! end!!!

Masterlist

#seo johnny scenarios #unlisted

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fuckblizzardbearlover · 5 years ago

Text

vauging post is vague*

So like i dont know why people post stuff they dont want ppl to comment on or reblog. Literally the entire point of putting stuff on the internet is for other people to interact with it. if you just want to write your thoughts a word document will work just fine. The only thing i can think of is wanting to make sure everyone else sees YOUR opinion while you dont have to see others.

Regardless. Saying that characters dont deserve redemption (at the moment in their story) is not saying that you need someone elses permission to change.

Maybe you are thinking of forgiveness. But REDEMPTION is a cosmic idea.

“ to make up for; make amends for; offset (some fault, shortcoming, etc.): “

“ to deliver from sin and its consequences by means of a sacrifice offered for the sinner. “

redemption is the PROCESS of understanding what you did wrong, why it was wrong , feeling guilt for it and enacting the process of trying to fix it with the understanding that it might never be enough. thats why all those crycry edgy animes has the protagonist trying to save every life they can and suffering any punishment they are met out because they murdered so many people in the samurai war or whatever and even if they saved hundreds of lives it ‘wont be enough”

Its not something people can give you. If you, say, go to the family of every person related to the person you killed and ask them to judge you and they all forgive you, you are not redeemed. the very nature of redemption, regardless of ones belief is the idea of there being some sense of justice and force of good in the world and the hope that if you do enough good it wont FIX what you broke but it will MAKE UP FOR IT, because the whole point is the thing you did CANNOT BE FIXED.

and that is my point. No Jasper didnt get ‘her moment’ nor a redemption arc because 1) its “steven universe” not “Space Gem Alien Opera” and the focus isnt on her, and 2) for her to get a redemption and start the arc would require her recognizing that what she did was wrong and then make the CHOICE to make up for it. I would say periodot and Lapis are STILL trying to redeem themselves. based on the narrative, when Greg first told steven about the war, the gems (rightfully) still feel guilty about their peoples near destruction of the billions of life forms on earth (which is compounded by the fact that it wasnt untill steven forced them to socialize, that they even saw the humans as equals and worth saving, and by their own admission only did it because its what rose wanted).

Thats my point Jasper LOVED the totalitarian government, she ENJOYS hurting people. SHe KNOWS they suffer and that gives her PLEASURE. She Likes the way gem society is because it means she gets to kill things and torture other gems who are beneath her. she fully believes in imperialism. She-does not-deserve-redemption. At least not until about a full seasons character development. it took peridot multiple episodes to decide to help the good guys and that was to save herself and several more episodes before she considered herself a steward of the life on Earth. ANd she never ENJOYED being evil.

And same goes for shadowweaver. There COULD be character development that changed her personality. but as her personality is at the moment she doesnt have a good bone in her body. she does not care about life nor people, except those that she deems belonging to her. And that was my point. she didnt have a tragic backstory. She was a Haughty bully who saw everyone else as beneath her. When the rulers of her kingdom decided the risks were to much she said she knew more than any of them and risked herself, her charge, and the whole kingdom. and when they didnt accept her monsterous mistake for the brilliance she saw it as, she went to the most evil organization she knew to trade power for the lives of those under her protection.

She does not care for anyone, she is evil and selfish. she has never even questioned if she was doing the right thing, she values no one’s opinion but her own, and she fundamentally sees manipulation as the main form of interacting with people. She-Does not-Deserve-Redemption.

At least not until she has a fundamental change in personality, an epiphany a realization that Every horrible thing that has happened to her has been her fault because she CHOSE magic and power over people.

And keep in mind that recongizing that a FICTIONAL character that is in a STORY is not at a point in their CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT to deserve to be redeemed, something the most penitent people might not achieve....Does not make one a hater or an anti or whatever. I love jaspers character and SHadowweaver is one of my favorite characters in She Ra and i Hope both finally reach that epiphany in a well crafted reasonable way (which i believe the writers are capable of doing). But they arent there yet and might never be there because of the Core aspects of their character.

Catra is a CHILD who’s bad habits and personality traits were created out of FEAR and her narrative arch has been amazing. Because its been done well, forcing her to hit rock bottom so she can see her fuck ups. but She did not choose to live in the fright zone, she didnt choose her caretaker, But she DID choose to not abandon the horde, she did choose to value her pride over friendship. And thats what her path has led her to.

hitting rock bottom, realizing that while she had legitmate reasons to be a skamp that her losing everything was HER FAULT. She’s hit rock bottom, she’s realized her unhappyness is caused by her own hand, and now the healing can begin.

So if it took catra 5 seasons to even see the dawn of her redemption arch, i highly doubt Mrs “i’m going to sell out my children for power” will get one any time before the series is cancelled.

*and i’m VAGUE POSTING not @ ing because 1)I dont want to harrass the person who inspired this post 2) i want to put this post out there for other people to see because i think many people need to see it 3) This gives them the option to read or not read it nor does it call attention to them 4)lots of people here are really stupid and do that “I’m going to post something where millions of people can see it but dont anyone dare respond to it!” thing where you make your post private after someone gives a fairly respectful rebuttle, and i AM calling ALL you bitches out cus its fucking dumb. stop doing that.

#she ra #Catra #she ra spoilers #shadow weaver #jasper #steven universe spoilers #steven universe future #peridot #redemption arc #narrative discussion

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lokbobpop · 3 years ago

Text

Focus

Well, the word focus comes directly from the Latin focus, which meant “fireplace” or “hearth” (that is, the floor of a fireplace). This is what focus originally meant in English when the word entered the language around 1635–45, though that sense has been extinguished, as it were.

Focus is defined as to concentrate on something in particular. ... Focus is defined as to bring into view. An example of focus is to put all of one's energy into a science project. An example of focus is to adjust a microscope to better see a specimen.

Focus fo cus f ocus foc us fuck us

Writing the word focus

Well thsi is a brilliant point to bring up my lack of focus i get so distracted by the mind i forget to focus on what is there like my mark 6 win today theres 80m up for grabs tomorrow and as the time gets closer my mind liek t focus on the energy it can build up within me in the thoughts if has which is 1 ive been told one day at 52 i would win a large amount of money to fill the bank im now 55 but the brains says hey maybe they were wrong lol 2 the desire to have such large amounts of money my ego where i see i dreams often of owning so much money and what i will do with it i see most people have this mind problem within desire its nothing new it does however need ot be delt with as i have no need ot think such things on a regular basis maybe when I buy and when it is i have no use for thr thoughts in between this time they are productive and just not needed for sure as it bring me into being and seeing myself better and another grander and so on so yes manybe only twice Mind hav enough go that ??? All other thoughts are not needed.

Reading focus

I need to train my focus when i write i mean i have go so much better lately as i just get sidetracked with something on my leg maybe the dogs didn’t get ot after all lol when i first started writing it would take all morning to do 1 or 2 words i was so sidetracked it wasnt funny i would drift off all the time at least now i can really tune in more but i need it to be better run like a business thsi doesn’t support so stop that thought now and close it down asap yes close down my mind its going out of business with ni customer to believe in its propaganda anymore the mind with live equal with me and ot against me be with me mind come on see what we could really do yes thanks for this little high you are now sendi game of positive energy i see what you do i didnt ask to be positive got get it lets move on your are a program you could be with me as one ????? I am your creator so that means i can be your destructor yes

Having dyslexia does mean you cant focus as well i body just disagreed with this a not all dyslexia people are this way but i am i think out attention span well im not that bad but my daughter trin does have a problem here with focus i need to teach her more about getting into the physical fro sure.

I see my focus has to be open up a lot more as in when my mind bring up comparisons or past relationships i need to be more focused on stopping and seeing whats it all about why am I allowing my mind to do this what have i not covered within it i have two main ones at the moment along with desire today but this will change hopefully when i get thsi one out the way ill have a new one and i wont be creating any new ones to deal with this is key right her no more new lol

It’s like training really im training myself to focus on what my mind is showing me about me it doesnt know whats write from wrong it just shows me what i have not dealt with thats all i need ot deal with it when and as it comes up that all simple as that really.

What you focus on expands like what you put your attention on will just get bigger like the money mark 6 desire the more I allow it the bigger it will get so what i will resist will persist so deal with in each moment not later now breathe for thr small one writing for the big ones until you move past each one and clear it within you. Ive currently got many to work with next week i have made more time for myself to do this.

Saying focus

To be intent on an outcome and to not let shit get in your way this is me thsi is who im becoming within me oh yes i want this im dedication for this life is my dedication to being me ive done so well im so pleased with myself oh yes.

What you focus on expands again as see i have dimples in my focus of what i think i should be and what is happening i dont want to go backwards only forward my mind just showed me a time i wanted ot go back to wheni wanted something back i dont want anything from my past it has no real support for me now or in my future so thanks mind i saw that i dotn need that im safe sound and confident i dont need another to do this i can do it on my own.

So if i focus on my process i should theoretically expand it right so all my focus on what my mind shows me and dealing with it will eventually expand it so i can move freely as i do more now so i can help another move more freely yes this so.

Thought of my eyes cant focus now on words i need glasses and I remember B saying you cant heal the eyes i think he looked into it so i should take care of my eyes for sure hey.

Does this definition support me no and yes of a sort i know what i have to do to get where i want i know how to use my mind and not let my mind use me but show me what i am allowing within me so i use it it doesn’t use me its my tool im not its tool

Focus foc us

Focus

To see what i want and go for it, to use my mind to see what im missing to have one outcome within this life to be free of the my constraints and see clearly

I will live this word with looking at what needs doing looking my thoughts of what is best for me and all to be tunnel vision to see what i want and go for it i have the perseverance i will not stop until done

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