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lowytavis · 29 days ago

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Bodhi Durran x Reader - Wait? We have a child

Warnings: unknown pregnancy, fear of loss, angst

Short: Bodhi and his troup were sent away on a mission outside of the wards after graduation. None of them returned for 1,5 years. And you thought your boyfriend hat died. And so did your almost 1 year old son.

____

"I don't want you to go," I murmured against Bodhi's chest, holding him tighter as if I could keep him here just a little longer.

He sighed softly, resting his chin on the top of my head.

"My love, I promise, in just four weeks, I'll be back with you," he whispered, his voice gentle like a warm breeze.

Then, he pressed a long, loving kiss to my lips, as if sealing his vow with that touch.

But he did not keep his promise.

No one came back.

Day after day, week after week, I waited.

Watching the horizon, hoping—praying—to see the familiar silhouettes of dragons soaring through the sky.

But neither the dragons nor their riders ever returned from the mission.

"You promised," I whispered, my voice trembling as I looked up at the vast, empty sky.

Tears welled in my eyes, spilling down my cheeks, each drop carrying the weight of my broken heart.

____

Fast forward a couple months

"You’re pregnant," Violet murmured, gently holding my hair back as I leaned over the toilet, retching—for the fifth time in the last five days.

"There’s no other explanation," she added firmly. Rhiannon, who was sitting beside me, ran a soothing hand over my back.

Tears welled up in my eyes, blurring my vision as the realization hit me like a wave.

I was carrying a child—a child I could never share with him.

My love, my Bodhi.

He would have been the most wonderful father.

The kindest, the most loving, the most devoted. He would have held me close, whispered words of reassurance, dreamed with me about our future together.

But he was gone.

I exhaled shakily, sinking into the depths of my thoughts.

What if things had been different?

What if Bodhi had come back from the mission?

What if Panschek had never called his name alongside the others?

What if, instead of Violet and Rhiannon, it was him sitting beside me right now?

Holding me.

Comforting me.

What if Bodhi were here?

But he wasn't.

So I let Rhiannon and Violet take care of me.

They cared for my pregnant body, which grew weaker with each passing day.

For my broken heart—one that friendship could not heal, but at least made the pain more bearable.

And for the tiny new heart growing within me, a fragile spark of life in the midst of my grief.

____

Fast forward a couple months

"I don’t know what to call him," I murmured happily, though exhaustion clung to my voice.

Violet and Xaden sat beside me on the bed, their eyes fixed on the tiny baby boy in my arms—the son I had just brought into the world.

Violet’s eyes shimmered with unshed tears, and so did Xaden’s.

"Bodhi would have loved him," Xaden said quietly, his voice laced with sorrow.

There was no doubt where his thoughts had wandered—to his cousin, to the man who should have been here to meet his son, but never would.

"Finding the right name is hard," Violet murmured, gently running her fingers over the baby's soft, delicate face.

"He looks like Bodhi," she whispered. And she was right.

Up until now, I had been too focused on surviving the birth to truly see him.

The overwhelming joy of holding my son filled me with warmth, but the moment I really looked at him, the crushing grief of Bodhi’s absence washed over me like a tidal wave.

His hair was already dark, thick, and curling at the edges—just like Bodhi’s.

A striking contrast to my own.

He was a Durran through and through.

"What about Malachi?" I suggested, testing the name on my tongue. But the moment I said it, I shook my head. "No... that doesn’t feel right."

"I think Koa is fitting," I suggest softly.

Xaden perks up, a small smile breaking through the lingering sorrow on his face.

"That’s the perfect name for the little guy. Koa. Durran?"

"Yes, Durran," I confirm, my voice thick with emotion. "After his father."

Tears well up in my eyes as I speak, the weight of Bodhi’s absence pressing against my chest.

"Welcome to the world, little Koa," Violet whispers, her voice warm and full of love as she gently strokes his tiny head.

____

The months flew by in a blur. With all the chaos happening at Basgiath, it was no surprise.

Things had become far too dangerous for all of us.

So, Xaden made the decision—we, Violet, the other marked ones, and I, along with Koa, his last blood relative, would relocate to Riorson House.

It was the safest option, especially for Koa. And for Violet. Violet Riorson - his now pregnant wife.

Koa was growing fast, too fast.

He was quick, agile, and far too clever for his age.

Violet often helped me care for him, especially on the days when grief took hold of me and refused to let go.

I thought, with time, the grief would become more bearable.

But the older Koa grew, the more he resembled his father. And I could swear, his mannerisms were just like Bodhi's.

"Uncle Xaden," Koa gurgled, reaching his tiny arms out toward him. He couldn't say much yet—after all, he was only 11 months old. "Mom, Uncle Gar, Uncle Xaden, Aunt Vi," he babbled, his words a mix of innocence and heartache.

And then, when he saw the framed picture of Bodhi hanging in the throne room—a memorial that Xaden had placed there on the first anniversary of Bodhi's death—he said, "Papa."

It was a bittersweet reminder that Bodhi was gone, but not forgotten.

And now, Koa carried pieces of him with every smile, every word, and every gesture.

____

Rain lashed against Riorson House, its rhythmic thrum echoing through the stone walls.

Xaden had been pacing restlessly all day, his unease palpable. "Violet, please go to YN and Koa—something's wrong," he murmured urgently, gently guiding his very pregnant wife toward my chambers. "Go now."

(...)

I patted the empty space next to me on the bed, offering a smile.

"Come," I said.

She returned the smile and collapsed onto the bed, her large belly making her look almost too small for the weight she carried.

"If that’s not a pair of them," I grinned, tapping her stomach.

Violet shot me an exaggerated look of mock horror, her eyes wide.

"Oh, please—don’t even joke about it. Two? We’ll have a whole little army soon enough."

I chuckled and pulled the blanket up to my chin, my thoughts heavy with the storm outside.

The last thing I remembered was the warmth of Violet beside me... then sleep slowly pulling me under.

I woke up to the soft patter of little feet as a tiny human—named Koa—tried to climb into bed with me and his aunt.

He squirmed, his chubby hands reaching up as if determined to join us.

I gently lifted Koa into my arms, pulling him close and holding him as he nestled against me.

The warmth of his small body, so innocent and full of love, soothed me. Mere seconds later, I drifted back into a peaceful sleep, the sound of rain outside creating the perfect lullaby.

The rain—it had always been my favorite sound to fall asleep to.

A gentle, constant rhythm that washed away the worries of the world, if only for a little while.

____

The door flung open with a loud crash, snapping me awake. Xaden stood in the doorway, his face pale with shock, eyes wide with urgency.

Without a word, he commanded, "Violet, YN, come with me—now."

Koa, still asleep in my arms, barely stirred, so I gently eased him back into the bed, tucking the blankets around him before rushing to Xaden.

We moved swiftly, following his tense figure down the hall, our hearts racing with the unknown.

As we reached the yard, my breath caught in my throat. Three dragons stood in the landing field, their massive forms looming against the stormy sky.

One of them stood out immediately—Cuir.

My heart skipped a beat as I recognized the sleek, dark green scales, the sharp, intelligent eyes.

Bodhi’s dragon.

The one who had once carried my late boyfriend through the skies, but who had disappeared along with him, never to return.

Xaden froze for a moment, the shock on his face swelling with something I couldn’t quite place.

Violet's hand grasped mine, her eyes wide as she took in the sight of Cuir, standing as if nothing had changed.

Her gaze flickered from dragon to dragon. The other two dragons... Lutic and Maghraxs.

My mind raced, the pieces clicking together. These were the same two dragons that had been with Cuir and Bodhi the night they vanished, the night everything went wrong.

The night they disappeared from our lives forever.

My breath caught in my chest, a cold feeling settling deep in my stomach.

Violet stood frozen beside me, her eyes locked on the three dragons, shock and disbelief written across her face.

Xaden, on the other hand, was a trembling mess.

His body shook as he stepped forward, inching closer to Cuir, as if drawn by an invisible force.

"Is it really...?" Violet whispered, her voice barely audible in the still air.

Xaden nodded, though his eyes were filled with doubt.

It was as though he couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing, and yet... he couldn’t pull away.

Cuir’s eyes locked with Xaden’s, a moment of recognition passing between them. The air around us felt charged, thick with emotions neither of us could name.

And then... The world seemed to hold its breath.

Bodhi.

Sitting atop Cuir.

My heart stopped.

It felt like the world was spinning, and I was about to faint.

There, before me, was Bodhi—alive.

His presence seemed impossible, yet undeniable.

Xaden, beside me, stood frozen, staring at his cousin—who was supposed to be dead.

His face was a mix of disbelief, confusion.

Bodhi slid down from Cuir with a fluid grace, closing the distance between him and Xaden.

The two of them stood for a brief moment, eyes locking. And then, without hesitation, they embraced.

Their arms wrapped around each other in a powerful, heartwarming hug—one that held so much emotion, so much love, there wasn’t an inch between them.

They held on tight, as though their bond was something that had never been broken, despite all that had happened.

Violet and I stood in stunned silence, our eyes wide, our minds struggling to comprehend the scene unfolding before us.

And then, Bodhi’s eyes found mine.

"Bodhi?" My voice cracked, barely a whisper.

My knees gave out beneath me, and I collapsed to the ground, my body wracked with sobs.

The relief, the joy, the overwhelming emotions flooded over me all at once.

Before I knew it, Bodhi was there, stumbling toward me—fast, but limping, his movements pained.

His eyes were filled with concern as he dropped to his knees on the muddy, wet ground beside me.

He gathered me into his arms, holding me tight as the tears flowed uncontrollably.

I clung to him, my chest heaving with every sob. He kissed my head, again and again, as though he couldn’t stop himself, as if he were trying to make up for all the time lost.

Violet, too, was pulled into the embrace, tears streaming down her face as she pressed against us.

The three of us, wrapped together in a reunion so raw, so filled with love and grief, we all cried.

Bodhi looked at Violet, his eyes widening with shock. "You’re... pregnant?"

His voice was a mix of wonder and disbelief.

A small, exhausted grin tugged at his lips, though his face betrayed the toll the journey had taken on him.

He looked different—worn, tired—but alive.

And in that moment, the exhaustion seemed secondary to the joy of being home.

"You’re alive," I whispered through my tears.

"I thought I’d lost you forever."

Bodhi kissed my forehead gently again, holding me even tighter.

"I’m here, love. I’m here."

____

Minutes felt like hours.

We were still standing in the rain, right in the middle of the landing field.

Bodhi and the two other riders, Tomba and Kevis, were telling us about the intrigue, the other fallen comrades, their desperate attempts to escape captivity—a struggle that had lasted a whole 1.5 years until they finally succeeded.

36 hours ago, they had managed to escape.

They’d flown for 36 hours straight—from Basgiath, where they found nothing but death, to Aretia.

To us.

“Papa,” I heard Koa’s small voice as he entered the landing field, pointing at Bodhi.

I hadn’t even noticed that he had come outside.

Bodhi stared at Koa with wide eyes.

“Mama, that’s Papa!” Koa said, looking up at me.

Bodhi’s gaze shifted to me—his eyes, wide and beautiful, locked onto mine.

I smiled shyly and walked toward Bodhi.

“I think I need to introduce you to someone,” I said, lifting Koa into my arms.

“Bodhi, this is Koa Durran,” I said softly. “Your son.”

Bodhi was at a loss for words as he stared at Koa, who happily turned to Xaden.

"Uncle Xaden, that’s Papa!" he giggled, and with a joyful rush, he flung himself into Bodhi's arms.

Bodhi stood frozen, his eyes wide with shock, as Koa wrapped his small arms around him.

He glanced at me, still in disbelief.

"Wait… we have a child? I have a son? What else did I miss?" His voice cracked, and tears welled up in his eyes. "I'm so sorry, love... Wait? Koa Durran? You kept my last name alive?" he whispered, his gaze fixed on me with overwhelming emotion.

I sniffled, my own tears beginning to spill.

"Well, I never got to have your last name, so I thought Koa might want to at least..." I trailed off, my voice faltering.

Bodhi let out a soft, teary laugh. "Oh, we are so going to fucking change your last name, love," he moaned, his voice filled with emotion as he pulled me close.

He wrapped his arms around me, Koa still nestled in his embrace.

I could feel the warmth of our little family finally coming together after so long.

Violet, her face streaked with tears, scooted closer, desperate for a hug.

She reached out, pulling Xaden along with her, and we all gathered together.

The weight of everything that had happened seemed to melt away as we embraced, the sense of being whole, of finally being reunited, flooding over us.

For the first time in a year and a half, we were whole.

No grief.

No pain.

Just love.

The first night in 1.5 years as a family.

The first night filled with peace, warmth, and a sense of completion we had longed for.

Reunited. Finally. Forever.