#ctrl-z

[aistobascistod]

Gen X : Ctrl-X :: Gen Z : Ctrl-Z

[thegirlsarealwaysgagged]

DISSOCIATIVE IDENTITY DISORDER, Performance and Pageantry:

There’s a certain expectation that comes with being a system, our representation is few and far between and good representation is even rarer.

There’s a look, a sound, a feeling that is expected of systems. We’re meant to be monsters, completely inhospitable and disorderly. We’re supposed to forever be the child that in their eyes was destroyed, few understand that this was the brain’s way of preventing destruction.

We can’t have any sense of normalcy, or identity, or wholeness, because everyone, even subconsciously, views us as broken individuals that are solely defined by our traumas. We can’t take pride in our plurality, because then we are faking it. We have to perform, but we can’t perform too much because then we are acting.

If our alters are too different from us, they are not real. If they are too similar, then they still are not real. There’s no line we can tread that won’t result in fake claiming, there’s no escaping this idea that DID and the experiences of systems are not real. I have lurked in fake-claiming circles quite a bit and there’s no way for a system to gain respectability in their eyes, even those with diagnoses are accused of exaggerating their symptoms, as though showing the symptoms of your disorder somehow invalidates your experience.

They all say the same thing, even if phrased differently: Systems are a myth.

They talk about the rarity, yet never deny the existence of redheads and would never say that if 158 million people suddenly went missing there wouldn’t be global uproar, discord, panic, and fear. Our existence is simply too daunting for them to comprehend, yet we are expected to bridge the gaps in their understanding by being exactly what they need us to be.

Small, quiet, forgettable. They only can comprehend the broken child but can’t even begin to fathom the adult with complex traumas. The adult with self-awareness, the adult who can keep track of their lost time and who shows up differently for different people in their lives. They can understand and pity the child that is overwhelmed by the multitudes of plurality, but can not show empathy or extend understanding to the adult that wades the waters of the same experience.

I watched a debate about how alters aren’t really different people but rather splits in the same psyche, which is fine though it does oversimplify what that actually entails, but the most infuriating part was that people in that subreddit were trying to argue that as though it would be functionally different. Logically, I know I am a split of psyche, but I have my own memories, own preferences, own skills, which makes me functionally my own person. When cells undergo Mitosis there’s the parent cell and two identical daughter cells, yes they’re genetic copies, but you still have three distinct cells that increase the capacity of a cellular system. Systems and alters are even more complex and individual than that cycle, but we are not given the dignity of being our own persons?

[djchorlocontrolection]

(Ctrl-z)

[dillyt]

[grey-viridian]

Remembered that I can draw on paper too

Tried to catch a rainbow

[autisticaradiamegido]

day 216

never a bad time for a panel redraw imo

[rotten-dan-art]

I think Jay should take the chicken as his pet, bcuz I want it so bad. also think that a chicken would look at Kai's hair and say its free real state :)

you can see an extra of this comic on my patreon! along side some other unposted pics/other extras

[doodlewizardry]

Have you ever wanted to find your old Ao3 comments? Easily keep track of which (and how many) fics you've commented on? Rediscover a fic that you left a time capsule of a gushing essay on?

Well, you can! And it's simple! (* Note: it only works for comments written after you turn this on.)

Go to your Preferences:

There's a checkbox labelled "Turn off copies of your own comments". This is selected by default. If you deselect it (and save your preferences) then you receive an email for every comment you leave.

But I don't want to get my inbox flooded by Ao3!

Understandable! Luckily, most email clients allow you to set up rules for incoming mail depending on their sender and contents. For instance (using Gmail), I've made it so that these emails skip the inbox, are marked as read, and moved to a label I call my "Comment Collection".

The result? A complete, organised and fully-searchable repository of any comments you leave from this point onwards! Search by fic name, author, date, that one sentence you vividly remember leaving!

I've set up other rules, too, like starring emails that are replies to my comments - I'm always excited to receive them!

I love this system, and I think it's motivated me to leave more comments. I hope that others find it useful too. Happy commenting!

Original preferences trick from this Reddit thread. Tagging @justleaveacommentfest, which motivated me to write this post!

[stardu]

Song: 翡翠のまち/Town of Jade by Mel (Covered by Rachie)

This has been rotating in my head all day.

[salamispots]

gonna try inking this traditionally for fun (and also because my brain didn't like any of the digital attempts/wouldn't let go of the idea mkghjgg)

[fiendishartist2]

you appear familiar dear; you look just like my bathroom mirror!

[thegirlsarealwaysgagged]

I think sometimes singlets forget that they are outsiders looking into a mental disorder because of how on-the-surface everything is with certain systems. At least systems that are aware that they are systems and regularly switch. A lot of other mental disorders are more internal, the battles aren’t something that anyone else can see or hear, maybe the scars but that’s different than being able to interact with the aspects of the disorder. With being a system there’s a certain level of “audience participation”.

Singlets make friends with alters, sometimes even more than friends. They have alters that they dislike, that they don’t get along with despite getting along with others or even the host, I think this can lead to a place where singlets unknowingly forget that it is in fact a disorder. That there is a level of grace that is required when navigating your interactions with systems. It’s not necessarily coming from a place of malice either, but rather a very ignorant mindset.

I don’t think a singlet can ever fully fathom what it means to be a system, to share a body and a mind and sometimes it feels like even a spirit with different parts of yourself. To not have a solid, singular identity but rather be aware of all of the ways you are separate and distinct but to still try to act as one. So even when singlets are not passing judgement, they’re still not fully understanding systems, and it is hard to emphasise with an experience you fundamentally misunderstand.

Being a system is a traumagenic experience, I beg singlets to be more aware that they’re speaking to parts of the host’s trauma, they’re speaking to their coping mechanisms, their life savers, their guards, and their rocks.

[fluffsnake]

Here goes my art masterpost for the @spnangelbang (bangel) :D

Doors Unlocked and Open Story: sidewinder @hawkland Art: by moi~

I'm so happy to have had the opportunity to collab with @hawkland on this! The fic caught my attention straight away with the unique and interesting story premise, and Hawk here has been an absolute joy to work with ♥ you can read it here ^^

I couldn't decide on only one scene to draw, and wanted to depict both Cas and Dean embracing their new roles respectively, so in the end I settled on doing a collage of multiple scenes from the fic. I hope you enjoy!

“I love you, Cas. I’m dead and it doesn’t matter, because I’ve found you and I can tell you to your stupid goddamn face that I love you.”

also here's a process video and more rambling below the cut if ur into that kinda stuff

Now I realize I liked the initial composition too, where instead of Death!Dean I wanted to try and re-draw the banner a little better...

I feel like it looked better in the page overall, but I just had to draw a cocky Death!Dean leaning on his scythe instead as soon as I got the idea :")

P.S. I'm no good at drawing, like, graphic elements, but I would've totally wanted to add some SLUUURP and munch munch SFX indicators like in the initial sketch haah

please pretend they're there, or something.

[crayoncat-works]

back on my olba bs

[an-established-butt-dent]

'Dreamers' A quiet evening

Solas x Lavellan, available as print here.

Mixed media on paper

[meamiki]

many mirabelle’s for mirabelle's birthday :]

happy birthday to mirabelle !!!!!!