#cs: ateez
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writingmochi · 10 months ago
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starring MATZ as the illest villains
cast: matz (hongjoong and seonghwa) ✗ fem.reader (featuring ateez and other idols)
synopsis: strickland is known to be the land without expressive freedom. but, strickland's underground is in a frenzy with the newly-discovered old form of expression: music. leading the underground scene, the maddest MATZ uses the audio and visual arts of hip-hop as the anchor for a brewing rebellion. but, the underground is so much deeper than what they have conquered. besides, what's wrong with backing the villains of the world?
genre: superhero fiction (any form of art/music is portrayed as a superpower), dystopian future, science fiction, adventure, action, mystery, thriller, drama, romance, angst, mature content (rebellion and war, underground illegal things, explicit smut)
based on: music madvillain’s “madvillainy” album (2004), comic batman's gotham city and rogues gallery, ateez's strickland lore, and music history (a gateway for me to nerd out about music)
status: to be released
message from the moon: remember that this story is fiction and do be careful and read the warnings at the top. all the idols mentioned here are not what they are in real life.
first set of ateez fics and it's an anthology?! each matz will have their own respective readers/mcs which you can see below the cut. posting this so i can remember that this is to be a priority wip. the masterlist will also be updated accordingly :] and the story, though anthology, will be linear in the timeline
taglist? right here
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SUPERVILLAIN THEME
cast: villain!hongjoong ✗ villain!fem.reader
synopsis: coming soon
OPERATION LIFESAVER
cast: villain!seonghwa ✗ anti-hero!fem.reader
synopsis: coming soon
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taglist: @raeyunshm @leilasmom
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wooyoungisbaby · 8 months ago
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Choi San core
More Ateez memes! Please reblog :} 
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choism · 2 years ago
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riding bf!san for the first time and he comes as soon as you're fully seated, but instead of being turned off u start bouncing bc he's still hard
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San's breaths quicken as your glistening cunt hovers above his twitching shaft. You had been edging him all night and now his cock is ready, he's resdy to be fucked.
You sink yourself down onto him and as soon ad you bottom out he lets out high pitched gasps and whimpers and immediately you feel his hot semen fill you to the brim and leak out of your cunt.
You feel seemingly endless ropes of cum spurt into you, filling you to the brim and making you feel so much fuller.
"Mommy I'm sorry," San says with hot tears spilling from his glassy eyes. "Felt so good couldn't help it please- ah!"
You move your hips up and down, utilizing the natural lube fron your slick and his cum to your advantage and bouncing at a brutsl pace on his sensitive cock. San starts practically screaming with pleasure from the hours of edging and now overstimulation, his spent cock sending waves of euphoric pleasure from his head to his toes.
He can feel it already bubbling inside of him, another orgasm hot and making its way to his center fast. It feels so hot and tight like a rubber band about to snap from being stretched to far and with a few more thrust he cries out as he feels your wet walls clench around him.
He fills you up once again with his semen, this time even more comes out as he feels his balls tighten and cintract with pleasure and his cock twitch with each rope.
"Mommy! Fuck fuck fuck mommy god!" He garbles out, barely intelligible with the way you continue to roll your hips again.
"I haven't even cum yet sweetheart, wanna go another round?"
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© Choism 2023. do not repost or translate.
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leatherbookmark · 10 months ago
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yet another remake of the log 117 woosangs (one, two)
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yundeob · 5 months ago
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A NIGHT IN HOLLYWOOD ☆ | ATEEZ SERIES
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— featuring ot8!ateez in iconic HOLLYWOOD romance and rom-com movies
— TICKET BOOTH IS CLOSED! 🎟️ : the movies are about to start! all fics will have MATURE CONTENT! MDNI!
sit back, relax, grab your popcorn and tissues, and enjoy the silver screen . . .
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THE PARENT TRAP ☆ | KHJ
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TROPE: exes to lovers! divorced!au
TAGS: nsfw, smut, fluff, angst, crack, slice of life
AS DIVORCED PARENTS to two twin daughters, you and hongjoong have your fair share of work cut out. Driving to piano lessons, cheering at hockey games, drop offs at each other’s houses, it can all be a little much. But could a relaxing summer retreat as a whole family possibly rekindle past emotions you’ve swept under the rug? . . .
— IN THEATRES
DIRTY DANCING ☆ | PSH
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TROPE: bad boy!seonghwa, enemies to lovers!au , 60s!au
TAGS: nsfw, smut, angst, crack
THAT WAS THE SUMMER before JFK got shot, before the beatles came, and when you were working part time at your aunts summer resort. That was also the summer you met resident heart breaker and cocky entertainment crew member, Park Seonghwa. Remind yourself why you’re suddenly dance partners with him again? . . .
— not yet in theatres . . .
PRETTY WOMAN ☆ | JYH
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TROPE: dilf!yunho x formerstripper!reader, strangers to lovers!au, contract lovers!au,
TAGS: nsfw, smut, fluff, angst
LIVING IN BEVERLY HILLS comes with its perks. But for two different people such as yourself and multimillionaire business tycoon, Jeong Yunho, both of you can’t seem to find what you’re looking for in the so called ‘Land of Dreams’. So the proposal is simple really… let him spoil you with money, jewelry and clothes while in return, you stay by his side. . .
— not yet in theatres . . .
MR AND MRS KANG ☆ | KYS
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TROPE: marriage!au, established relationship, spy!au, assasin!au
TAGS: nsfw, smut, fluff, ANGST, crack
WHO WOULD’VE THOUGHT picture perfect suburban neighbourhood couple, Mr. and Mrs. Kang would be at each others necks trying to kill each other first. You’ve both come this far in your marriage while hiding your secret identities, but it looks like only one person can remain standing. I guess you both did promise “in sickness and in health”. . .
— not yet in theatres . . .
ROMAN HOLIDAY ☆ | CS
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TROPE: royalty!au, princess!reader x reporter!san, strangers to lovers!
TAGS: nsfw, smut, fluff, angst
AS CROWN PRINCESS, you’re on a tightly scheduled tour of European capital cities. But after an especially rough day in Rome, you sneak out of the embassy to explore the so called Eternal City, running into no other than celebrity news reporter, Choi San, looking out for his next big royal scandal. . .
— not yet in theatres . . .
10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU ☆ | SMG
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TROPE: college!au, stoner!mingi, enemies to lovers!au, fakedating(?)au, y2k aesthetic
TAGS: nsfw, smut, fluff, angst, crack, slice of life
YOUR YOUNGER BROTHER Wooyoung is desperate in getting you, his older sister in college, to date so that he can finally date in highschool. The options for potential candidates are scarce, considering men flock away like birds the second you’re near. Good thing campus stoner and weirdo, Song Mingi is the same as well. . .
— not yet in theatres . . .
HOW TO LOSE A GUY IN 10 DAYS ☆ | JWY
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TROPE: fashioncolumnist!reader x advertiser!wooyoung, y2k aesthetic, fake dating(?)au, enemies to lovers!au, mutual pining
TAGS: nsfw, smut, fluff, angst, crack, slice of life
LISTEN, IF IT MEANS getting a promotion at your editorial company as a news journalist instead of pop culture and lifestyle columnist, you’d do anything. And that includes pretending to be the most annoying and clingiest girlfriend to some guy for 10 whole days. But just so you know, Wooyoung likes clingy. . .
— not yet in theatres . . .
ROMEO & JULIET ☆ | CJH
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TROPE: unrequited love, star crossed lovers!au, mutual pining, secret romance (shakespeare be rolling in his grave rn)
TAGS: nsfw, smut, fluff, ANGST
FOR CENTURIES, a plague of hatred and hostility has been present in the relations between the House of Choi and your own. You know you can’t be together, but yet why do you keep catching that dark haired boy staring at you so longingly? And why do you want him just as bad?. . .
— not yet in theatres . . .
a/n: for updates, follow my blog! this will be a work-in-progress so I ask for your support:(🙏
taglist: @vent-stink @dazzlingstarrs @vcutparis @xpixie @potatos-on-clouds @showingmafandomlove @bibbleypoof @kpop-will-kill-me @avantalem @beabatiny @gabrielle-brugger @nsixns @amaranth1ne @stayminho @myblovedjyh @kkeshia @rebekah-reads @yoonbroom @4kwp @butterflydemons @iwaizumiismybae @soobinsputnik @stayatinykatsy @atitties @justconniez @kitten4sannie @ghostskilledmyaddiction21 @cheolsthicthighs @morethingsfandom @geminiml95 @byuntrash101 @quailbagutte @syubseokie @newworldwritings @urmom26john @sleepy-kat-here @pearltinyy @hjshyhyssnmgwyjh @cursedeastern @starryunho @piratekingateez2001 @jiminbility @paumll @drinkingrumandcocacola @roomsofangel @channies-bbg-room @meanaonthemoon @teeztopia @pommelex @kiln9z @sanhwalvr @youresolivlie @edawg77 @a-0206 @summer-gyu @bvidzsoo @yoongzsmile28 @tournesol155
taglist became too long so find the second taglist here💀 no longer taking requests
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hwaslayer · 11 months ago
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crimson (cs) | one shot.
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—summary: life has always revolved around the club, the money, the clients— that is, until a first-time experience changes everything for san, for you; causing lines to be blurred, boundaries that are crossed. he didn’t think he’d get wrapped around your finger, falling deep into your spell. after all, he did become your number one client.
—pairing: choi san x stripper!reader
—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers to lovers, nightclub au | smut, angst
—word count: 21.8k
—content/warnings: cussing/mature language, heavy on the night club/strip club setting, lap dances, oc doesn’t remove her clothing by choice but is a little more hands on with her clients at the club, alcohol consumption/intoxication, san’s got some baggage with his ex, mentions of a toxic past relationship, mentions of severed relationships with loved ones, protected/unprotected sex, praising, making out, one shower together hehe, missionary, doggy style wooof, cowgirl, sprinkle of spit play, clit play, breast play, mentions of marking, ass slapping, mentions of men getting touchy at the club, fighting (some pushing and a few punches), arguments, flashback scenes, not all ateez members are present - only mingi, san, wooyoung, hongjoong and jongho
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—on rotation: agora hills - doja cat | anywhere - 112 | all night long - thuy & lil kev | IT’s you - wooyoung, san & yeosang
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He became your number one client. 
Quick.
You remember the first time he stepped into the club with his friends, eyes roaming the floor until they landed on yours. You hadn’t expected the group to walk in when they did— the club being pretty dead lately, with the usual, familiar men walking in to let off some steam, to get their fix. You could tell it was the first time they’d ever walked into a strip club with the way they paused near the entrance, not really knowing where to go or how to get settled from there. One of his friends took the lead and walked towards the main stage, his hesitancy obvious with how stiff and awkward he was as he sat on one of the velvet chairs closest to the stage. You hadn’t really paid much mind to them at first, especially him. You had been busy on the other end of the stage, but his eyes had been glued on you the entire time.
That solely piqued your interest. 
He sunk into the chair comfortably, manspreading as his hands rested on his legs. He stared at you with his cat-like eyes, almost pleading for you to come closer and entertain him while his friends were busy tossing bills at your coworker on the right side of the stage. 
He didn’t budge.
You strutted over, initially planning to tease him a bit; play around, work with his ways to give him something to remember. Little did you know that taking the first leap, giving him that attention, was going to change everything between you and this stranger.
Everything.
▹ FLASHBACK
You step in front of the pole, sliding down until you get to a crouch– making sure your legs are spread enough for him to see the itty bitty fabric from your bodysuit barely covering your parts. You can see him subtly bite onto his bottom lip as he leans forward, elbows resting on his knees. You get a little closer, getting onto your knees to crawl towards him; ass posted up in the air while you keep your eyes glued onto him. You’re close enough to the point where he can slip a few dollars into the v-neck of your bodysuit.
And he does, adorning that pretty smirk of his; pearly whites peeking through those pink, plump lips.
“Atta boy!” You hear one of his friends yell. “San’s finally enjoying himself!”
“Dude’s got heart eyes. Look at him. Mesmerized as shit.” Another of his friends laughs before continuing to shower the right side of the stage with bills.
San was his name.
San.
“Gorgeous.” You hear him mutter as you continue to work the stage, eyes glued onto him with every move— every twirl, every dip, every roll, you make. His eyes are taking note of every detail, every tattoo that lines your arm, down to your hip and thigh. Because he wants to study you, all of you.
“It’s his birthday, give him something special!” You glide down the pole before stepping off the stage to greet the men sitting around. It was a normal routine for you, a way to initiate flirty conversations and take men back to a VIP booth for lap dances— lap dances that could easily earn you rent in one night. 
A few of your regulars are sitting around, waiting for some kind of touch, attention. Which, you easily give through running your hand down their chests, whispering sweet nothings as they tuck a few more dollars under your bodysuit. 
Throughout all of this, San is still focused on you.
So, you make your way back to him; his friends are still loudly proclaiming he’s the birthday boy that needs a little gift tonight. And lucky for him, you’re feeling rather generous— especially with the way San buckles around you, pleading, begging, for more of your attention since he walked through the door.
“Is it really your birthday?” You crouch in front of him, hands traveling up his thighs while you lick your lips and bite onto your bottom lip.
“Yeah, it is.” He swallows the lump in his throat when your hands brush against his belt.
“Please give him a private dance.” The same friend from earlier says. He has short black hair with a mole underneath his eye, black button-up exposing his honey skin underneath. He slips you a few hundred bills, a smirk plastered on his face when you meet his gaze. You gladly take the money and stuff it into your bodysuit, grabbing San’s hand as you lead him to the VIP area.
“You didn’t have to.”
“You come to a strip club on your birthday and try to deny a lap dance? That your friend paid for? Odd.” You tease as you push him against another velvet couch. The VIP booths are off to the side of the club, with red mood lights and cringy, dark red velvet curtains draping the front to provide privacy. The booths are small, intimate; just enough space for you to work the pole and be all up on San.
“I mean, I just—” He chokes on his words as he plops onto the couch. “You’re a busy woman, it seems.”
“I am.” You straddle his lap. “But, I can make time for birthday boys, too.”
“That’s nice to know.” His eyes carefully watch your every move. Your hands travel down his neck, down to his tie— tugging on it as you start to bodyroll against the music, against him, making sure San feels you. “Fuck.” He mutters under his breath. You watch as he reaches, but prevents himself from touching your thighs; afraid he’d be crossing a line even though, technically speaking, those lines have been blurred since he walked into the club.
“It’s okay, San.” You reassure him with a whisper, lips almost grazing his ear. His eyes meet yours just as you pull back and bounce on him a bit, hands caressing up and down his chest. You continue to work him slowly, taking your sweet time to make San feel appreciated, to make San feel like he’s had the best birthday in years.
“You know my name?” He says, hands comfortably coming up your body, giving your breasts a squeeze. His hand runs up your neck, to your jaw— gently forcing you to keep eye contact with him as you continue to dance on him. He’s entranced by you that he doesn’t really know what else to say, or how to react. But god, do you feel amazing on him. That body, too?
Heavenly.
“Your friends have been yelling it all night.” You stand and straddle him in the opposite direction, legs wrapped around his torso as you lean forward and bounce on his dick a little more. San can’t help but run his hands down your ass, giving it a good squeeze before you come back up and pry yourself off of him to head to the pole in front of him.
“Fair enough. What’s your name then, beautiful?” You look at him, ignoring the question at first. But, San feels a little different than your usual customers, feels a bit more personal even though you don’t know anything about him nor does he know anything about you. It’s the way that he looks at you, focused on your face, your every move. It’s the way that it’s a room full of dancers and he’s stuck on you. Most men are in the club to fill a void; seeking for quick satisfaction, something that’ll eventually blow over until the next visit. But, it’s nothing more than that. You are nothing more than a dancer, nothing more than a face on stage— someone who collects their bills and runs.
But to San, you feel different.
Before you look into him too deeply, you quickly snap out of it and begin to twirl around the pole, doing your usual pole routine when you’re in the VIP booth. You fall into a split, hand coming down from the pole, down to your body.
San follows.
“My name?” You repeat, and San nods.
“Is that not a normal question here?”
“No one ever gives out their real names here.” You chuckle.
“Then, what’s your stage name?” Time passes when you’re dancing. Usually, you give them 30 mins tops, 45 mins if they keep sending big bills your way. But, you never try to spend more than that with the same person. Not in this community. With the hundreds San’s friend handed you, you would’ve stopped at 15 minutes if this were anyone else.
You’re closing in 20– probably will be 30 when you blink— but you don’t really wanna stop giving San this attention. He’s attractive, fitting his button-up and slacks in all the right places. He has black short hair, a few strands draping over his forehead, a pretty Rolex sitting on his wrist. You think he could handle you if you gave him the chance, and the thought is enough to make your brain short-circuit.
“Crimson.” He smirks, running his finger across his bottom lip while he continues to watch you bounce your ass on the stage. He thinks you’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever laid eyes on— the bodysuit doing your body wonders as it makes his mind wander to the unknown.
To what you would look like naked, to have you underneath him, to have you calling his name.
He’s been glued to you from the start and he’s not sure what kind of spell you have him under, but he wants more.
“Crimson.” He repeats, the stage name dripping off his tongue like water. “Are you here every night?”
“Maybe, maybe not.” You twirl with a smirk on your face.
“Come on, don’t do that.” He leans back, head resting against the couch as his hands rest on his thighs.
“Why would it matter?”
“I wouldn’t wanna come back if you weren’t here.” You giggle, stepping away from the pole and slotting yourself back in between his legs at a crouch.
“There’s plenty of other amazing dancers, you know? I don’t make the club.”
“You’re right, you don’t. But, it’s not them I’m asking about.” Your hands travel back up his legs, your face inches away from his dick. You swear you hear him hiss a bit the minute your face glides over, planting small, chaste kisses against his clothed stomach right above the belt. 
“I’m here 4 days a week.”
“What days?” You stand, bending to whisper in his ear. His hand comes up to graze your thigh and hip, shivers shooting down his spine when you respond with:
“I guess you’ll have to find out.” Because now, San takes it as a challenge and he’s determined to figure out which nights you’re here. Initially, he agreed to this whole thing thinking it’d be a one-and-done— a birthday done differently after all these past years only to become an after-thought as time goes on. But now, he wants more of you, all of you; wants to keep seeing you, feeling you, touching you, seeing you dance for him and him only.
He’s not sure what kind of spell you have him under, but he wants more.
You look at him once more, tipping his chin with your finger before dipping forward. You only give him enough so that the tips of your noses brush against each other, enough to tease but not please the birthday boy on his special night. 
“See you soon, Sannie. Happy birthday.” You whisper before turning on your heels and leaving him in the VIP booth to return to the stage. San has to gather himself for a minute, loosening the buttons on his shirt and his tie and adjusting his pants before heading back out to his friends.
“So?! How was it?” Wooyoung leans over on the chair right after he greets another dancer making her rounds across the floor.
“Good.” 
“He’s red in the face.” Mingi laughs. “It was more than good.”
“Say thank you for the best birthday ever, Wooyoung.” Wooyoung teases and San can’t help but shake his head. He’s still lost in thought, eyes subtly scanning the room to find you but you are busy taking new customers into the VIP booth. The room feels hot, and he wishes he could be in the VIP booth with you, alone. He truly wished it never ended. “Let’s head to the bar and get more drinks.” San shrugs and follows along, the 4 of them heading into the bar where the music is louder, and other dancers are flooding the area.
As the night goes on, you’ve finished tending to your regulars— already knowing what they want, what they need, but making your boundaries clear every time they try to step over the line and take advantage of your generosity tonight. By the end of your shift, it’s 3am and you’re exhausted. Your feet are hurting from the platform heels you’re sporting. It’s crazy how after all this time as a dancer, you still aren’t used to the heels you have to throw on, excited to dip your feet in a hot, lavender foot bath when you get home. You change back into your casual sweats and matching hoodie, throwing the hood over your head as you bid farewell to your coworkers and step out the back door into the cold, crisp night. When you cross the alley to get onto the main road, there are a few gentlemen standing around, some smoking their cigarettes while chatting with their friends.
Usually, no one causes you trouble. From time to time, your usuals are drunk and babbling nonsense about how they wish they could take you home, show you ‘a new world.’ But, no one ever gets handsy, no one ever forces themselves on you. For the most part, they know what this is, they know at the end of the night this is nothing but a temporary fantasy— one you fulfill for a specific time frame before the new day dawns and things go back to normal, to routine.
Tonight, it’s a bit different.
“Yo, isn’t that the dancer?” You hear a familiar voice as you cross through the alley, passing by a big group on your way. They seem to be tending to a friend who has gotten sloppily drunk, yacking their brains out off to the side of the club. 
“Aye cutie, going home already? Wanna give the birthday boy more love?” Another friend questions after he pulls the cigarette from in between his lips and exhales. “Bro, Mingi. Hurry up and get your sloppy ass together. It’s fucking cold.” He scolds their incredibly drunk friend afterwards.
“Hongjoong.” You hear San call for his friend. You do nothing but give them a simple look as you continue to walk on, trying not to feed them any attention. As attractive as San is, you are too tired to deal with this right now. After all, you are just a dancer. What more could you be to him? You temporarily feed into their fantasies, nothing more, nothing less.
“What, it’s a simple question. You never know, she might be down.” 
“Sorry.” San apologizes on his behalf, his eyes red and glazed from the alcohol.
“Not down?” Hongjoong asks again, his eyes now glued onto you.
“No, I’m not.” You respond, walking backwards to maintain eye contact. 
“Aw, why not?” Honey-skin with the black-button up chimes in. “He’s single. He could use it.”
“The fuck? Not helping.” San looks at his friend and taps him on the chest, making him bust out into a loud laugh.
“I don’t do that. Nothing beyond the club. Sorry to disappoint.” You smile at them before walking off onto the main street.
“Can he at least escort you home?!” They call out as you cross the street, making you roll your eyes as you continue the journey home all by yourself.
▹ END
Since then, there’s been a new addition to your regulars. One particularly more intriguing than the rest. You didn’t really believe Mia when she told you the familiar face came on your days off, asking the bartender if you were dancing tonight. He came, and he came, until he figured out the exact 4 days you worked. To say you were surprised would be an understatement because why on earth was San actually looking for you?
Why was he actually trying to figure out your schedule?
Did he really want to see you, or were you just his favorite dancer? Was he too shy to get close to the other dancers [at a strip club]?
It’s been a couple of weeks and San still comes. But, you’ve pushed the questions to the back of your mind; taking his visits with a grain of salt. You weren’t sure you’d pry anyway, afraid you’d be reading into this too much. After all, you are just a dancer.
What more could you be to him? You temporarily feed into their fantasies, nothing more, nothing less.
“Babe, your man is here.” Mia peeks into the dressing room, her head popping in from the doorway.
“He is not my man.” You give her a look, but she giggles and smirks before turning.
“Hurry that ass up, he seems anxious.” She calls out just before she heads back out to the main floor. You roll your eyes, dabbing more lip gloss on your lips before heading back out onto the floor. As promised, San sits in that same chair you met him during his first night at the club while Wooyoung [you’ve come to learn] lingers near the stage. Wooyoung is already entertaining another dancer, taking every opportunity to slip a few bills underneath her bikini top. 
To tease San a bit, you come up from behind up, trailing your hands down his chest while your lips ghost his ear. He turns slightly just for some sort of confirmation, though he’s already studied your body— down to the way you move, the way you tease.
“San.” You call his name. “Should I still be surprised that you’re here again?”
“You tell me.” He smirks, that pretty smile of his slowly becoming a weakness for you. “I’m just here to get my fix.” He winks, even though he really just wants to see you and be alone with you again.
“Get in line.” You tease. San immediately holds up a few bills, eyes darting from yours to your cleavage in that incredibly tiny silver bikini top you have on.
“Should I?” He subtly bites onto his bottom lip as he slips the money right into your top. You playfully roll your eyes and lead the way to a VIP booth, San undoing his cuffs and rolling up his sleeves just about halfway up his forearm. Truthfully, yes, it’s been a long day [week, even] and he’s needing a release; wanting to let out some steam. But, he’s also excited he could do that with you and only you. He watches your hips sway as you walk and wait for him to enter the booth, shutting the curtain close so that it’s just you and him underneath the red mood lighting. 
You step onto the stage; twirling around the pole before you bounce your ass on the stage. San watches intently, eyes glued to your bottom half when you spread your legs and show him how much those bottoms aren’t doing shit for you.
He is so, so curious. 
He takes note of every detail of your body, studying it over and over again like a book. And god, he wants to do everything and nothing all at once— stuck between wanting to get his hands all over you and doing nothing just to admire your pretty face, your figure. San felt like maybe this was just a phase, a new, exciting experience in his life that’ll soon fizzle out.
But when San looks at you, he can’t agree. He’s not sure what kind of spell you have him under, but he wants more.
He leans back onto the couch, his head resting against the edge as he manspreads. He licks his lips while watching your hands travel down your chest, your stomach. 
“Why are you so far?” He questions, motioning for you to come closer. Your bikini top and bottom are still driving him crazy, and he’s certain he’ll lose his shit once you sit on his lap.
“So eager tonight?”
“Just been a rough week.”
“I’m sure, as with everyone else here.”
“Am I just everyone else?” You let out a small chuckle, straddling his lap. His hands immediately come up to cup your ass, giving it a good squeeze before you start to work your hips on him. He’s gotten pretty comfortable by now, though San still shoots you a look as if it’s his way of asking for permission first. You appreciate the little things, and San most definitely isn’t just like everyone else. But, as with any defense mechanism, you resort to a guarded response:
“I mean, you’re here at ungodly hours tipping girls for a dance.” He lets out a small laugh, strong hands now at your hips. 
“Mm, I really only come for my favorite though. You might know her?” He jokes, his face only inches away from yours. 
“Do I?” You follow along with his teasing. The strap to your bikini top falls off your shoulder and San’s eyes follow; the small room feeling 10 degrees hotter, pants a little tighter. 
“Mhm.” He hums, his finger tracing a line up your leg. “She has tattoos just like this lining her thigh—“ He moves it up to your hip. “Up her hip.” His thumb comes up to your lip. “Pretty lips just like that. Long lashes. Prettiest smile I’ve seen.” His face moves towards your neck, lips grazing the surface below your ear. “Mole on the neck.” You subtly bite onto your bottom lip. San’s hand brushes up against your breast before he touches the small mole on your neck.
“Sounds like a lot of the girls around here.”
“Mm, but the one I’m thinking of goes by the stage name Crimson.” You continue to tease, bounce on him a little more, shake ass a little more. Your eyes linger on him a bit longer than you’d like, and you find yourself retracting. To him, the room is probably degrees hotter— for you, it’s starting to feel suffocating.
“She’s nothing but a ‘lil dancer, San.” You whisper in his ear, lips brushing against the surface before you hop off his lap. San is a little confused at the sudden change, but you feel like you’re reading too much into this, too much into San.
This isn’t supposed to be anything but business.
Why would San ever want you in that way? Most of this is to fulfill a want, a need, a fantasy. San is most likely saying this to get what he wants, to take charge and lead you on.
Though, at the end of the night, you are nothing but a face, a dancer. He wouldn’t think about you past the club. That is where this ends, regardless. 
You give San one last look before you brush past the curtain, returning to the stage closest to the bar. Wooyoung is getting dragged to a VIP booth, his other friends now standing and gathering around the stage to get up close and personal to the girls currently on there. You make a beeline to the stage near the bar, the area being a little more dead than the main stage room.
Right before you hop on stage, Mia is delivering drinks to a few men off to the side of the room. She shoots you a look, following after handing over the drinks.
“Why are you rushing? Did something happen?” You wait for the bartender to hand you some water.
“Nothing happened.” You sip a bit to shake off your thoughts, your feelings.
“You sure? I’ll beat someone’s ass if you need me to and call security to toss them out.”
“I promise.” You look at her and squeeze her arm. “I’m just gonna stick here for the rest of the night, though. Need a change of pace.” She nods.
“Alright, if you say so. I’m still onto you.” She says, leaving you to help the bartender with delivering the drinks.
For the rest of the night, you continue to dodge San and his friends until the end of your shift. You don’t usually leave through the front doors of the club, but tonight, you sneak out and rush across the street with your hood up. You can hear San and his friends as they leave, causing you to pick up the pace of your steps— hoping you’ll avoid being caught.
But, San sees you, anyway. His eyes can’t help but watch for a few seconds more before he’s returning his attention back to the boys. He felt the shift earlier, and he picked up on the way you continued to hop from stage to stage— seemingly avoiding their group. He’s not sure what happened, or why he feels like you’ve suddenly got your guard back up around him. It’s something about you, and San knows it shouldn’t be that serious. This became a fun little past-time for him and his boys. But every time he’s left the club recently, he leaves a little bit more attached to you.
Because yes, you know how to work your magic in there. It’s no fucking joke. He gets a taste of you on stage, in the booth, and it blows his mind. But other than that, it’s the way you return the same look, the same touch. There’s something else, more to you than the surface, and he’s curious to find out.
It shouldn’t be that serious, but for San, it is.
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“What’s wrong?” Jongho pushes a small coffee your way, cocking a brow when he sees how checked out you seem today.
“W-what?” You look at him, finally pulled out of your daze. “Oh, nothing.” You grab the cup and take a sip, giving him a tiny toothless smile of appreciation. “Thank you.”
“Sure.” He sets his coffee onto the side of the cart, helping you unbox a few albums that arrived today and needed to be restocked on the shelves. “So, really. What is it?” He asks, eyes still focused on restocking. Jongho has been one of your closest friends— probably the only closest, genuine friend that stuck by your side since you were younger. He still keeps in touch with the group you grew up with since middle school, but lots of those relationships have been severed after you started dancing at the club. Jongho was the only one who didn’t see you any differently, nor did he take the job as anything bad. He always knew you were passionate about dance and he understood you when times got tough; strapped on cash and needing a quick fix that would help you get by. It was a bit of a risky, somewhat dangerous step, but who was Jongho to control your life? You already didn’t have a great relationship with your parents, so the least Jongho can do is support you and be your pillar if no one else would be. He knew you could make your own decisions, and only you knew yourself best. He knew you’d take care of yourself, whatever that looked like.
Jongho was the manager at this small, quaint music shop in the city. Though, the city you lived in wasn’t entirely huge compared to others. It still had its old-school touch of wooden, soft decor with a rage of vintage to mainstream albums and art throughout the shop. The owner was a middle-aged man who used to play in a band back in the days, now retired and trying to stay in touch with his roots through the shop. Jongho had worked here for years before stepping into the full-time manager position and helped bring you on, especially during the time you needed it the most.
You really appreciate Jongho, and you’re glad you at least have him.
“Sometimes, I feel like I should’ve just finished school.”
“You did. High school?”
“College.” Jongho shrugs when you respond and give him a look.
“If it wasn’t what you wanted to do at the time, then why force yourself? Besides, it’s never too late. You can always go back to school.” He turns to you and places a hand on his hip. “Why are you thinking about this all of a sudden?”
“I don’t really know. What if they were right? What if I’m not good for anything besides being a stripper? What if I’m just that?”
“You and I both know that’s not true.” Jongho tosses the empty box aside, triggering you to get it together and start doing your job. “You’re smart, talented, and passionate about a lot of things. Especially dance. Just because you work at a club doesn’t make you less of a person, Y/N.” He says in that usual serious tone of his.
“Thanks.” You poke your bottom lip out as you arrange the albums and start tagging the price stickers onto them.
“Who is it?” You sigh, already knowing Jongho won’t leave it alone until you finally tell him the truth about why you’re suddenly questioning your life.
“It’s the same guy I told you about. The birthday boy.” Jongho does a tiny nod of acknowledgement.
“He’s still showing up with his friends?”
“Yeah, surprisingly. And he always looks for me. Asks for me. Doesn’t pay attention to any other dancer there.”
“Maybe he has a crush on you.”
“We know nothing about each other. He knows my stage name, he knows my club persona.” You sigh. “That’s why it made me question life. It’s dumb, I know.” You purse your lips together as you shove the albums into the shelf and move onto the next task.
“Well, there has to be a reason why he keeps coming back for you and only you. Maybe he wants to know you, outside of the club and that whole persona thing.” Jongho shrugs. “Never say never.”
“He’s a businessman of some sort. Suited up all the time. He must work for a really good company. Probably has a family that is well off.” You shake your head and make your way back to the front. “It doesn’t make sense.”
“I wouldn’t say that. Why don’t you ask—“ At this point, just as you settle at the register with Jongho, a few people enter the shop. You whip your head towards the entrance when you hear some laughter, only for your eyes to widen.
“Oh, shit. Jongho!” You whisper harshly. “What the hell is he doing here?!” He looks over your shoulder as San and Wooyoung walk in, Wooyoung instantly making a turn to head to the vinyl collection.
“Is that birthday boy?” You nod with a worried expression on your face. San is about to walk past the register when he furrows his brows at the small commotion happening behind the counter, turning his attention towards you and Jongho.
“Too late dude, he’s right there.” Jongho blocks you from leaving. “It’d be too obvious now, just take it like a fucking champ and say hi.” He says through gritted teeth. “I gotta walk around anyways.” He turns to San enthusiastically. “Hey, welcome in.”
“Hey.” San looks at the both of you, his brows still furrowed when his eyes land on your face.
“Hi. Let me know if you need help.” You try to scurry off, but San stops you.
“Woah, wait. You’re—“
“Don’t say it outloud here.” San’s lips form into the shape of an ‘o’ before nodding. He can’t help but glaze over your features and how naturally beautiful you are– the sun hitting your skin perfectly. You never packed on the makeup heavily on stage, but you did still have a face on every time you worked at the club. He subtly nibbles onto his bottom lip, hands dug deep into his jacket pockets.
“You work here, too?”
“Makes up for the days I’m not there.” He nods.
“Well, hi.” He gives you a small smile.
“Hi.” You tilt your head. “I’ve never seen you around this part of the city. Ever.” He snorts a bit.
“We’re never usually on the outskirts, but Wooyoung was adamant about getting vinyls for his new record player. You guys are the only shop that has a good collection.” You nod, San stepping aside when a customer unloads their basket onto the counter. He lingers around, watching how delicate you are handling the merchandise and how big your smile is when helping the customer. As expected, you’re very different from the club— you seem more relaxed, laid back. Sweet. Happy.
“So, are you just gonna stand there and wait for Wooyoung?” You chuckle after wrapping up the transaction and handing the customer their bag, bidding farewell as they head out of the store.
“I don’t really need anything so, yeah. I guess so. I’d rather talk to you, anyway.” You give him a look and take the sticker gun in your hand, walking away from the counter when a coworker comes back from break to relieve you.
“I’m working.” You head back to the floor, San following behind.
“I know.” He watches as you begin to sort through another shipment. “Are you gonna tell me your name now that we’re outside of the club?”
“Why do you wanna learn my name so badly? And why are you always at the club? Don’t you have like.. other things to do? A girlfriend or someone to entertain?” You shiver at the thought. God, you hope not. Especially with how he’s been lately. But, men are trash and you wouldn’t expect any less.
“Because I do? You’re not just someone from the club.” You look at him briefly before looking back down at the stack of albums. “And no, I don’t have someone to entertain. I wouldn’t be there often if I did.” Touché. “We just had fun on my birthday. It’s a good way to let out some steam after busy days.”
“Hm.” You hum.
“I like seeing you there.” He casually says, making you pause in your actions before continuing. 
“I don’t make the club, San.”
“You make it for me. Or else I wouldn’t be going.” You look at him again with a hand on your hip. He has a small smirk plastered on his face and you can’t help but notice how attractive he looks under the daylight— smooth honey skin, hoodie over his head, soft black hair teasing his forehead. Your eyes linger on him for a lot longer than you’d like, having to force yourself to snap out of it when you realize [again] that San wouldn’t want you in that way.
“What are you trying to do here?” You cock a brow up just before you start working on the CDs in front of you, marking them down and adding new price tags to the back.
“Get to know you.”
“Why me?”
“Why not you?” San continues to smirk, leaning against the shelves. 
“Y/N, take your break in a few minutes.” Jongho says coming down the aisle before giving San a small, pursed smile.
“Yeah, Y/N.” San chimes in and teases. “Pretty name for a pretty girl.”
“You ready? I found what I needed—“ Wooyoung comes from around the corner, pausing mid-sentence when he realizes San isn’t alone. “Oh, hey! I wasn’t expecting to see you here.” Your eyes dart to Wooyoung and he smiles. “Wow, you’re really pretty in the daylight—“ San taps him on the chest. “What, I’m just saying! It’s hard to really see faces in the club lighting. Besides, I don’t get the privilege of having private—“
“Okay, that’s—yeah.” San cuts him off and scratches at his head. “Really sorry.”
“You ready?” You let out a sigh before asking Wooyoung. “I can ring you up at the other register before I head to break.”
“Yeah.” You lead them to the smaller checkout stand at the end of the aisle, scanning Wooyoung’s items and bagging up his things as he pays. Throughout the entire time, San is still watching you; subtly biting onto his bottom lip when he can’t help but think of the nights at the club, being intimately close with you— seeing you in a different light than this.
Which, he’s trying not to. He just can’t help it. You are beauty in its purest form, and he wishes he could know more about you.
And you don’t fail to notice. 
The look San has in his eyes is different from what you’re used to seeing at nighttime. It makes you nervous from the butterflies you feel, the curiosity running through your veins— even if the other thoughts in your mind say otherwise.
“Guess we’ll see you around?” Wooyoung smirks before walking out of the shop first.
“See you soon, Y/N.” Just before San walks out, you shut off the part of your brain that keeps spewing negativity and all these other ‘what if’s.’
“W-wait.” 
“Hm?” He hums, his hands in his pocket as he cocks a brow up. You begin to scribble your number down on a random receipt that was left behind, pushing it over to San shortly afterwards.
“Don’t ask for free dances or anything though, I’ll block you.” San chuckles before grabbing the receipt and tucking it into his pocket.
“Don’t want that, now do we?” He winks before stepping out of the shop.
“Cute.” You glare at Jongho and hit him on the arm. “Ouch, what!”
“Why would you say my name around him!”
“You act like he wasn’t gonna find out one way or another, the dude definitely has googly eyes over you.” He crosses his arms and smirks. “Besides, you slipped him your number.”
“Ugh.” You continue to glare at him. “I’m going on my break.”
“So you can text San, hm?” You mouth out a quick ‘fuck off’ before turning on your heel and heading to the break room. The entire scenario hadn't been processed in your mind until now, unsure if giving your number to San was a good idea or not.
You didn’t wanna get attached to him. Not him, of all people. Though, you know you will, and that’s why it feels like a bad decision.
A decision you think you might regret.
The thought blows over when you get home that night, exhausted from your work day and the commute. You hop in the shower and whip up a teriyaki chicken rice bowl with some veggies. You plop onto your couch and turn on the TV, picking up on where you left off on the last episode of the series you were watching. Barely 7 minutes in, a call comes through on your phone, your eyes widening at the name flashing across the screen. Just as you briefly debate on answering the call, your hands are already moving towards the phone; swiping right to pick it up.
“Hello?”
“Hey.” San says on the other line so nonchalantly, as if you two had been talking for years.
“Hi?” You let out a small, nervous chuckle. “What made you call?”
“I just wanted to talk to you and ask how the rest of your day at work went.”
“Oh.” You shrug as if he can see you. “It was alright. Nothing too bad.”
“Yeah? Nobody get on your nerve throughout the day?”
“I also work at a strip club. I think the music shop is very mild when it comes to that.” You joke, making San laugh a bit on the other line. “How was the rest of yours?”
“Good. Wooyoung and I just grabbed something to eat before he brought me home.”
“Where’s home for you?”
“Probably 20 minutes away from the city.” He responds just as you hear dishes clinking in the background. “Did you eat already?”
“I am right now.”
“Oh shit, sorry. Do you want me to call you later? Or, I guess, I can just text you?”
“It’s okay, San. I don’t mind.”
“Mmkay. Just checking.”
“I know you just saw Wooyoung, but you guys aren’t hanging out with the rest of your friends tonight?”
“Believe it or not, we like taking breaks from each other.” He laughs a bit. “No but, Mingi, the really tall one, has a date or whatever tonight.”
“Or whatever?” You laugh.
“He’s weird about these things. Says it’s a date when we all know he’s not really ready to date seriously.”
“Mm, one of those guys. You like that, too?”
“Definitely not. If I really like someone and we hit it off, I’ll pursue them to no end.”
“Mhm.” You find yourself teasing him more. “Cute. Have you guys known each other for long?”
“Me and Wooyoung grew up together. Our parents are close, too. We met Hongjoong and Mingi in college.”
“That’s sweet.”
“What about you, Y/N? What about your friends? Tell me more about yourself. I meant it when I said I wanna get to know you.” You feel the heat rise to your cheeks, even though every bone in your body is telling you to continue keeping your guard up.
“Ah, did you? Cause it definitely sounded like a line.” You snort.
“It’s not just a line. Seriously.”
“I honestly don’t know what to tell you. I don’t have an interesting story.” You poke at your food before taking a small bite.
“Don’t say that. I find you interesting no matter what.”
“You say that now.”
“I’ll say it later, too.” He reassures you.
“I– I don’t know. I’m not close to my family after the decisions I’ve made, and friends left my side especially after I started working at the club more. Jongho is really the only person who has stayed by my side since we were younger.”
“I’m sorry. Why aren’t they your friends anymore?”
“I guess they just think I’m dumb for not going to school and for settling at the club.”
“I mean, that’s not really fair? It’s not dumb if it wasn’t what you wanted.”
“Yeah, well. They didn’t think I’d take dance that seriously.”
“You’re really good at it.” You chuckle hearing his response. “Why wouldn’t you?”
“Wish I could tell you. My family is in the same boat. My older sister graduated from college and started her own lab after finishing her postdoctoral appointment. Imagine how much my family looks down on me. I struggled for awhile and Jongho helped me out a lot.”
“I’m glad you at least have him.”
“I am too.”
“What else do you like to do?”
“San, are you sure you don’t have anything else to do tonight?” He laughs. “What about your family?”
“Swear. My family is fine, they’re doing their own thing.”
“Do they live around here too?”
“Nope, maybe an hour or so away? I have an older sister too, but she’s overseas right now. She’s in the fashion industry.” He lets out a small sigh. “I genuinely wanted to call you and talk to you after seeing you today.”
“You’re such a mystery.”
“Why’s that?”
“I don’t know. You just are. I see you at the club a couple of times, then I see you at the shop. Now we’re on the phone. It’s just funny how things play out.”
“Nothing mysterious about it. Maybe it’s just meant to play out that way.”
“What’s meant to play out that way?”
“Us.” You pause. Mainly because you couldn’t believe this is how things were meant to play out with San. Why was he everywhere and nowhere at the same time? Why was he calling you and trying to get to know you? And what if it was meant to play out this way? It could either mean two things— one, San was meant to play some sort of good in your life.
Or two, San was meant to break your heart and teach you yet another lesson in this crazy universe.
You weren’t sure what to think of it all, if you were even ready to figure out what all of this meant.
But, at this moment in time, all the regrets and thoughts continue to brush over your head because you like hearing San’s voice and you like talking to him outside of the club. You are intrigued, and you can’t say you aren’t keen on finding out what this is.
So, you continue to talk to San. 30 minutes turns into an hour; slipping into bed with San still on the other line. It’s easy to talk to him and you like that he initiates most of the conversation. He doesn’t judge you and he doesn’t pressure you into talking about things you don’t feel comfortable diving into right now. He doesn’t put the focus on himself much and he listens. You find yourself giggling, tossing and turning under the sheets— thoughts exploring uncharted territories.
San almost feels like a bad decision; a decision you think you might regret.
For tonight, you’ll take it. You’ll take this for what it is, and you’ll take San for who he is. You’ll find out what his role is in your life and why this is playing out the way it is for the both of you.
Maybe he is good.
Maybe he is a heartbreaker.
Or maybe San is meant to be San, a passing moment in your life that eventually just ends.
Whatever it is, you’ll figure it out. Even if it's something you might regret later on.
“Can I tell you something Y/N?” He asks just as you feel the exhaustion hitting your body.
“Mhm?”
“You’re really beautiful. I like seeing you, especially on stage. You know how to drive people crazy.”
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San continues to text and call you, just to ask if you’re doing okay— to let you know he always looks forward to seeing you. Small smiley faces, goodmorning’s and goodnight’s, dropping by with food or just to say hi at the music shop; you can’t help but feel the butterflies in your tummy grow when it comes to San. 
You’re not sure if you despise it or not.
Jongho says you should just see where it goes and tries to reassure you by telling you what’s meant to be, will be, and that you shouldn’t read too much into things right now. 
Keep doing you as you have, and continue to move forward.
But, it’s a lot easier said than done. Especially when you don’t understand what San wants out of you. He’s respected your boundaries through text, not asking for free dances or nudes, only keeping it brief to check in on you sometimes. Yet, at the club, he’s handsy. He’s vocalized how much he wants you and how much he wishes he could know more about you outside of the club.
San is an enigma.
You count in your head as you slowly take steps forward on stage, trying your hardest not to get distracted.
One, two.
Twirl around the pole.
Three, four.
Fall into the splits.
Five, six.
Bounce.
You get back onto your fours, shaking ass for the men lined up near the stage constantly tossing bills your way and shoving it under the ties of your bikini bottoms. It isn’t long before the main stage is where the most activity is happening— the club incredibly busy tonight with tons of celebrations. You’ve just stepped out of a VIP booth, your client paying you more than you could ask for by simply requesting if you could just work the pole for him. You gladly oblige, making it one less man to give a lap dance to before your shift is over. 
Besides, you can’t help but think of San.
And the moment you start to think about him, is the exact moment you find him lingering in the club with his boys— eyes scanning the stage and room before they finally find you near the VIP booths. It’s been a minute since they’ve stopped by. San has mentioned that he and his friends have just been swamped at work and that he can’t wait to let some steam out soon. He’s in all black tonight; black fitted slacks, boots, a black-button up with his chest partially exposed. He’s got a silver chain around his neck, and god, does the sight immediately do things to you.
They order a round of drinks before San finds himself at one of the seats next to the stage. He’s entertaining the crowd a bit, joining in when your coworker steals the stage and grabs the attention from the men around you. You don’t mind because it gives you the opportunity to slip away and take a breather, maybe run for a quick water break before you sway your hips in San’s direction. 
And sure enough, he’s been waiting. Like he always is.
Just as you sweet talk your way through the crowd and grab a few extra tips for it, San gently wraps his hand around your wrist and pulls you onto his lap. He smirks at you, eyes glazed over from all the alcohol he’s already downed.
“Mm, I’ve been waiting.” He says. “Can I have you?” The question sends shivers down your spine, his touch against your hip electrifying. 
“Depends.” You tease as he slips a few bills into your bra. “Can you handle it tonight? You’re pretty drunk.”
“Can always handle you, babygirl.” He says in your ear. You instantly stand to your feet and grab his hand, leading him to one of the free VIP booths. As soon as you pull the curtains close and try to work your way over to the pole, San pulls you back onto his lap— hands caressing your sides as you fix your position and properly straddle him. “Need you here, not there.”
“Thought you liked watching me work the pole.”
“I do, but not as much as I like watching you on me.”
“You’re incredibly suave tonight, what’s gotten into you?” You giggle, feeling San’s hands grope your ass.
“Just missed you.”
“We’ve been talking quite a bit.”
“I know, but it’s not the same as seeing you.” 
“You just missed the club.”
“Nah. You.” He corrects you. Something about San is different tonight, but you can’t say you dislike it. He’s a little more straightforward, a little more bolder, a little more open about his want— his need— for you. Especially when he caresses your tits; palm gently gliding over before giving your nipples a good pinch. Especially when his lips ghost over your neck, jaw, finally finding its way to your ear. Especially when he whispers about how pretty you look and how he wishes he could kiss you.
“Who said you couldn’t?” He pauses for a moment to look at you, really look at you, before taking his hand to your cheek and bringing you down to his lips. The way your lips crash is intense, full of lust.
Want.
Need.
A craving to be fulfilled.
The kiss easily turns wet, sloppy; San’s hands digging half crescents into your hips as he guides you to work your hips against him. He lets out a shaky breath in between, lips now traveling down to your jaw, neck.
“Fuck.” You hear him groan against your skin, right before his tongue glides against the surface; nibbling and sucking gently to soothe the mark.
“San.” You call his name as he continues down to the base of your neck, collarbone— lips now pressed against your inner breast. Part of you feels so, so good in San’s arms. But the other half feels so incredibly conflicted about the whole situation solely because San is an enigma. You aren’t sure if it’s enough to sway you away. Reality hits when the crowd outside roars in cheers, pulling you away from the sweet daydream, the sweet fog that temporarily clouded your vision. Your hands rest on his shoulders as you gently pry him away and push him back. “San.” You repeat.
“Yeah?”
“We shouldn’t.” He licks his lips, eyes still glued onto yours. Surprisingly, he doesn’t fight back, no. Instead, he kisses you one last time— lips locked until one of you pulls away first. You hop off his lap and walk off towards the curtain, giving him one last look before leaving him alone. “See you out there, okay?” Is all you manage to say. San knows better than to do this here, of all places, but he can’t seem to help himself. He’s stuck on you, has this pull to you, and he wants it all. He doesn’t fight though, because he should be doing better. This probably looks all wrong and confusing to you and he doesn’t mean to do that. He’s just no good at this, no good at approaching you— you, so sexy and so independent.
It’s something about you, and he’s losing his mind.
“Shoot your fucking shot already.” Hongjoong comes around the corner from the bathroom, running into San as he exits the VIP booth.
“What?” He asks, still a bit discombobulated after the short but intense session in the booth.
“Your girl.”
“She’s not my girl.”
“Shut up.” He says, forehead furrowed. “We come to the club and all you do is look for her. Can’t tell me there isn’t anything more to it.”
“I don’t know.”
“Just do it. What do you have to lose? You’re not getting any younger.” Hongjoong snickers, but it quickly fades when San’s expression hasn’t changed. “You’re just trying to fuck, right?” San finally meets his eyes but he doesn’t say anything, and it kinda freaks Hongjoong out. “What the fuck, San?”
“What?”
“You actually like her? You can’t be serious. I thought it was just a one time thing–”
“What the fuck does it matter?” San lets out a small chuckle to play off the whole thing, but frankly, he’s trying his hardest to not let Hongjoong ruin his mood. “Look, I’m not trying to think about this here. Ready?” He nods towards the bar, finding Mingi and Wooyoung amongst the crowd.
For the rest of the night, you do what you do best— deflect and avoid. You’re not sure how long you can keep doing this around San, especially every time you have an encounter with him. You start questioning yourself so much that it gets to you, that the reality of the situation starts dawning on you even though you have no foundation to back things up. But, you’d like to think that you haven’t fallen too deep; you could still swim up to the surface if you needed to, and you’d like to keep it that way.
However, that feels like a far reach when your shift ends. You feel like you’ve escaped for the umpteenth time until you realize you really haven’t, and that maybe, San was always going to be an enigma you were meant to figure out.
“Y/N.” You hear a familiar voice call for you as you walk down the street. You’re still walking at a steady pace, but the steps behind you seem to be catching up fairly quickly. “Y/N—” You turn and place your hand over his mouth, making San furrow his brows at you.
“We’re still nearby. I’d like it if you didn’t go yelling my name around like that.” He chuckles as you let him go, continuing your walk home.
“Some people should know your name by now, right?”
“And the majority that don’t?” You look at him. “Let’s keep it that way.”
“Sorry, beautiful.” You playfully roll your eyes, trying to keep your guard up.
“What’re you doing, San?”
“Walking you home.”
“What about your friends?” You pause in your steps, creating enough distance between you and the club by now.
“They can handle their own.” He shrugs. “Let me walk you.”
“Then, what?”
“Then at least I know you’re safe and sound.” You let out a breath before continuing to walk with San. You aren’t gonna lie— having San’s company makes you feel ten times safer, and you feel comfortable having him alongside you. Usually, you rush your walk just to get home in one piece. Tonight, you can finally enjoy the crisp, night time air for a bit longer. 
Tonight, you can finally enjoy the stars for a bit longer.
Tonight, you can enjoy San for a bit longer.
“San?”
“Hm?”
“Don’t you get tired of going to the club?” He shakes his head and laughs.
“Not really. It’s kinda fun. Beats going to a regular club.”
“Can I ask?” He nods. “What do you do for work?”
“I just work for a tech company in their finance department.”
“Interesting.”
“Why?”
“I didn’t know tech guys liked strip clubs so much.”
“Change of scenery.” You chuckle, easing up a bit in San’s company. “Is this your usual walk home?”
“Mhm. It’s not so bad.”
“Yeah, but it’s also like.. 3am.” San looks down at you. “Why don’t you just take an Uber home or something?”
“Why, when it’s within walking distance?”
“Safety reasons. You don’t feel scared?”
“Not really. I’ve done this walk for years now.”
“Why don’t I just bring you home from now on?” You laugh.
“Even if you don’t go to the club?”
“Especially when I don’t go to the club.”
“That’s too much work. I can’t ask you to do that. Plus, you work a regular 9-5 I’m assuming.”
“But, I’m offering? I don’t really trickle in right at 9 for work, as long as I make my 8 or so hours for the day. Plus, I can work from home sometimes.” You don’t say anything, so he quickly follows up with: “I know the walk is close, but it makes me feel weird about letting you be out here this late after work.”
“Hm.” You look at him.
“Let me.” 
“Hey, just so we remember this— you offered and put that out on the table. Not me.” He laughs.
“Got it, your honor.”
“Are you not cold?”
“No. The cold is helping a lot right now.”
“How drunk were you today?”
“Pretty drunk.” He laughs. “It’s been a very long couple of weeks. I probably sound like a broken record but there’s no better way to put it. Lots of deadlines to meet with little time to prep.”
“Ah, the surprise deadlines. I’m sure it went fine, right?”
“Yeah, sure. After all the stress they put me through first.” San snorts.
“It’s done now. You made it.” You turn the corner and continue to walk down the path until you reach your building— a small, quaint building in the middle of the residential area. You lead San to your door at the far right corner of the building. “Welp, this is me.” You turn to look at him and he gives you a tiny, toothless smile.
“Cute.” You awkwardly fiddle with your fingers, feeling bad about turning San away. A part of you genuinely wants his company outside of the club and he seems to want the same, too.
“D-do you wanna come in, by any chance?”
“Only if you’re okay with it.”
“I am.” You turn to unlock the door. “Sorry if it’s super small and not aesthetically pleasing to look at.”
“Y/N, don’t apologize.” He steps in and steps out of his shoes, eyes wandering around your tiny studio. “It’s nice. I like the plants.” He eyes the plants near the shelf that blocks off your bed from the couch, TV and ‘living room’ area.
“Thanks. I try to take really good care of them.” He chuckles as he plops onto the couch.
“It’s a cozy space. It’s perfect for you, no?”
“I like it. I’ve been here for the past year and a half or so? Jongho’s aunt is the landlord and he did a lot to convince her to let me have this place for decent rent.”
“That’s nice.”
“Yeah. He was probably tired of me.” You grab two water bottles from your fridge. “I lived with him for a long time. We shared rooms.”
“He’s a really good friend.”
“He is.” You stand near him and hand him the water bottle. “Make yourself at home, I’m just gonna take a quick shower.”
“Can I join?” 
“Do you wanna be tossed out?” He laughs.
“Kidding.” He pulls out his phone and begins to scroll through his social media. “I’ll wait patiently.” You grab your shirt and shorts before running into the bathroom to take a quick body shower, excited to rinse off the night from your skin. It only takes you about 15 minutes to fully get ready for bed, San still waiting patiently on your couch. His eyes shift from his screen to you—
Slowly ogling your body,
Down to your legs.
“Feel better?”
“Mhm.” You plop next to him, watching as he lets his head rest on the back of the couch. “Tired?”
“Yeah.”
“You should go home and get rest.”
“Do you want me to go home?” He looks at you and you aren’t really sure how to answer the question. Yes, you do, so San can rest.
But no, you don’t, because you like having him here.
You can’t help but remember the events that transpired earlier at the club and what it would feel like to have his lips on you again—
“No, not really.”
“Good, cause I wanna keep you company for a little longer.”
“San?”
“Yeah, pretty girl?”
“When you kissed me earlier—” You lick your lips and swallow the lump in your throat. “Did you kiss me because you were drunk at the club, or because you genuinely wanted to?”
“I told you I really wanted to.” You sit and look at him, unsure of how you feel about his response. “You don’t believe me, do you?”
“It’s not that.”
“Then?”
“I don’t know, San. I can’t read you.”
“You don’t have to.” He sits up, his face only inches away from yours. “It’s okay to tell me you don’t believe me, Y/N. I’d rather you be honest than not.”
“Then, no. I don’t.” He lets out a tiny, breathy laugh, a small smirk perked up on the corner of his lips.
“Fair enough.” He says lowly, eyes scanning your lips, your face and all its features. “Then, will you give me another chance to show you so you do believe me?” His thumb gently caresses your chin before grazing over your bottom lip. “Hm?” He hums. You nod, giving him leverage to dip down further, lips locked with yours for another soft, passionate kiss. It quickly deepens when San slips his tongue in; his fighting for dominance against yours. You find yourself hurrying to position yourself onto his lap, hands grabbing at his shirt. He gently nibbles on your jaw before making his way back down to your neck, no longer hesitating to suck on certain spots to leave his mark. His hands make their way up your shirt, palming at your tits while you fiddle with the buttons of his shirt. “Let’s get this off, baby.” The petname sends shivers down your spine, making you easily oblige to his request.
You shed off his shirt just as he tosses yours to the side, mouth instantly latching onto your perked bud. His tongue moves in a circular motion, pulling back with a pop before moving onto the next. You let out a moan when he flicks around your nipple, sucking gently before trailing his lips a bit further down.
“Hold onto me. Need you on the bed.” He huskily says as you wrap your arms and legs around him, San’s hands coming down to grip your ass. He takes you to your bed, wasting no time to get rid of the rest of the clothing sitting on your bodies. Everything feels so intimately rushed with San because there’s so much desire, so many thoughts and cravings to be fulfilled. He continues to kiss you, slipping two digits into you to test the waters— to see how wet you are, how tight you are. “Jesus.” He mumbles against your lips. 
You are dripping.
“Sannie.” The nickname accidently slips from your lips again, making him smile against you.
“So cute when you say my name like that.” He lets out a breath. “You’re so wet for me. Think you can take me now?” He’s pumping himself and the sight makes you drool. He’s perfectly built— toned abs and biceps, skin dipped in honey, a perfectly thick cock. You nod, eager to get a taste of San, eager to see what he’ll do to you.
“Need you.”
“Oh, you do?” He has that smug smirk on his face just as positions himself at your entrance. “Shit, I don’t have a condom—” 
“Here.” You quickly dig through your nightstand and grab a condom you got last week. Dude who tipped you off thought he was slick by throwing a condom in there, thinking he could get some.
At least it came in handy to your liking.
San quickly rips the packet open, throwing the condom on before lowering himself back down onto you. You let out a broken moan when he slips himself in, slowly burying himself to the hilt. His breath is hot against your neck, the both of you releasing shaky exhales while you get used to the feeling. He begins to rock his hips at a slow, steady pace; mumbling curses against your skin as he adjusts to your walls sucking him in.
“God, you feel so good— fuck, Y/N. You’re so hot.” He grunts, his thoughts running wild about seeing you at the club, getting his lap dances.
To this.
Everything about you drives San wild and he’s not even sure how he can explain the feeling. So sexy, so independent; attitude on na-na while worrying about yourself and yourself only.
San starts to fuck you faster, hips pounding against you and echoing in the studio. You’re both probably a bit too loud for your neighbors right now, but you truly could care less. San was driving himself into you at a delicious pace, hitting you in all the right spots.
“San.” You call his name, hands tugging at the hair sitting on the nape of his neck. “Like that— like that.” You whimper. “Feels so good.”
“Yeah, baby?” He sits up to pound against you at a different angle, hands at your thighs to spread you completely open. He loves seeing the way your slickness coats his cock, his head tilting back in immense pleasure. “Wanna cum for me, pretty girl? Wanna cum all over this dick? So good for me.” He praises, and praises, thumb coming down to work your clit. 
“Oh, god.” You moan, hands gripping at the sheets as you feel yourself tipping over the edge the more San fucks into you, the more he rubs at your clit, the more your hips match his movements. You have never been this turned on by someone— at least, not in a very long time. San is so, so attractive. He is suave, and he knows what he’s doing with you. “So close.” San continues to praise you, telling you how beautiful you look underneath him.
How pretty you are.
How badly he wants you.
How you always drive him crazy.
And if it wasn’t for the constant praising, if it wasn’t for the way his hips worked so well against yours, if it wasn’t for the way San was skillfully rubbing at your clit— you wouldn’t be close to unraveling so quickly.
“San, I’m—“ You barely make out before you come undone beneath him, mouth slacked open as a silent moan leaves your lips; body trembling in his grip. This gives him momentum to drive his hips into you faster, harder; uncoiling shortly afterwards.
“Shit, Y/N. Feels too good.” San groans, unloading into the condom. His hands tightly grip your thighs as he gives it one, two more thrusts before coming back down from his high.
Everything feels so beautiful, yet intimately rushed. So, so good yet equally so, so bad for you.
Before you can even say anything, San lowers himself to give you a kiss on the lips. He kisses you for awhile before slipping himself out and grabbing a napkin to wrap the condom in. He quietly takes another few napkins to help clean up, wiping you gently before moving onto himself and plopping onto your bed next to you.
“You okay?” He asks, eyes closed as he regulates his breathing.
“Mhm.”
“Good?”
“Maybe.” He chuckles at your response, pulling you into his arms while you pull the sheets over the both of you. “Definitely worn out, though.”
“Yeah, same.” He kisses the top of your head. “Mind if I crash here for a bit? I don’t mind leaving too, if it makes you uncomfortable. Just let me know.”
“No, you’re good. I don’t mind, San.”
“Was hoping you’d say that.” You chuckle, adjusting your position to comfortably lay on San and fall asleep on his chest.
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This is when you start to regret ever giving San the attention, your number, everything. 
Because now that you know him a little more, San has become your kryptonite.
After that night, you woke up to an empty bedside— almost no signs of San entirely in your studio. Though it made your heart clench a little bit, part of you knew you wouldn’t be waking up to him.
For work, for other reasons.
Other reasons being that maybe, he really just did want you the one time. And the thought lingered for a little longer when he took awhile to text you that day, your mind running through all the worst possible scenarios during the hours.
▹ FLASHBACK
You slept like a baby after what felt like years, warmth of the sheets still engulfing you as your eyes flutter open. The sun leaves a trail down your sheets, everything quiet; still. When you turn, you find that San is gone— the dip on that side of the bed long gone, his clothes gone, waterbottle gone.
It was like he was never here in the first place.
Your clothes are set neatly off on the edge of the bed instead of the floor. And god, it feels kinda lonely without San. It’s your first telltale sign of attachment, though you know you shouldn’t be at that point after one intimate night with him.
But, it’s hard.
You check your phone and there aren’t any new texts besides Jongho and his need to send you random Instagram reels or TikToks. You lay in bed for a bit longer, letting out a soft sigh when you catch yourself wondering about San in that way. You shut your eyes for a little more, hoping you’ll be able to shake off the ‘what if’s’ with a couple of more hours of sleep. 
Meanwhile, San tiredly walks into the office a bit past 10am, hopping straight into his first meeting of the day. It lasts an hour before he’s finally able to walk to the kitchen to grab his first [and much needed] cup of coffee.
“What the fuck happened to you last night, Mr. Suave?” Wooyoung comes beside him, waiting to get his cup of coffee refilled.
“I walked Y/N home.” San smirks.
“Yeah, obviously.” Wooyoung slightly glares at him. “You’re not slick, dumbass. You fucked, didn’t you?”
“What’s it to you?”
“Wow, I’m your bestfriend and you’re asking me that question?” Wooyoung lets out a little ‘pfft’ before playfully shoving San aside to finally get his refill. “I’ll take that as a yes. What’s the deal with you and Miss Crimson, anyway?”
“I like seeing her.” San shrugs. “I like her company.”
“You barely know her outside of the strip club.”
“I believe that’s the point of getting to know her.” San says in a very matter-of-a-fact tone.
“Dude, I didn’t think you’d actually go for her.” San raises his brow.
“Why is everyone saying that? What’s so wrong about it?”
“Nothing! I really just thought you were trying toot it and boot it.”
“Hm.” All San can do is hum while he stirs the stirrer around in his cup. 
“But what about Noelle? You guys have that weird, toxic ex relationship thingy going on.” Wooyoung almost visibly shudders at the thought of their complicated relationship. So much back and forth, lying, getting in each other’s beds just to fulfill a need even though they don’t mean it for shit.
Yeah, toxic.
“Yeah, no. I’m done with that.”
“Mm, but you’ve said that before. You mean it? Like you’re actually over her because you genuinely like Y/N? Or, you’re done with it until you cave again?”
“I’m done with it.”
“Yeah, we’ll see.” Wooyoung takes a sip of his coffee. “I saw her texting you again.”
“I’m trying to tell her it’s done with.”
“Don’t see the urgency though, Mr. I-like-Y/N-and-I-enjoy-her-company. Out here breaking hearts in true Choi San fashion.” 
“Don’t say shit like that.” 
“Okay.” Wooyoung laughs, leaving him in the kitchen. San sighs to himself, a little tired, stressed even, about the whole Noelle situation. Truthfully, Wooyoung is right. Him and Noelle have too much history, too much baggage. Too much of that toxic shit. San is partially to blame because he does crawl back to her, he does cave pretty easily. And it’s not even because San wants to get back with her, no. He knows they can’t work out. All they do is bring out the worst in each other. 
But, Noelle is the only thing he’s known for awhile. She fills his void pretty well because it’s familiar territory. 
He’s done with it, though. He swears. He’s confused and not entirely sure where he sees this going right now, but you are intriguing. He sees you and his curiosity skyrockets. He wants to know more about you, and after last night, he feels like he can’t get enough of you. He wants more, and he’ll continue to show you that.
▹ END
“Yo.” Jongho’s eyes are barely peeking over the screen on the FaceTime call.
“What’s up?”
“What’re you doing?”
“Just hanging out. Eating some lunch.” You continue to poke at the salad you made. “How’s work?”
“Good, I guess. I’m grabbing some food right now from the shop down the street. How’s loverboy been?”
“Would you stop calling him that?”
“Well, what else is he, Y/N?” Jongho laughs a bit. 
“Not my loverboy.”
“Says you even though he drops by to bring you food and calls you nonstop.”
“He doesn’t call me nonstop.”
“Sorry, once a day.” He gives you a look. “Have you seen him lately?”
“No. He went to the club once last week. Said he’s been busy again with work. I feel like it’s something else, though.”
“Mmm.” Jongho hums. “You’re overthinking.”
“I’m not.”
“I can hear you from here. What is it?”
“He’s just been kinda weird lately.” 
“Distant?”
“Yeah. Maybe it is just work.”
“He’s probably just got way too much on his plate.”
“I shouldn’t even be thinking about it like this too much.” You finish up your salad. “It’s fine. I’m sure he’s fine.”
“Mm, okay. Well. Are you doing your usual shift at the club later?”
“Yeah.”
“How’s it been? Wanna hang out tomorrow before your shift?” He slightly pushes the phone away after placing his order and paying at the cashier.
“It’s the same old.” You sigh. “I’m down for that though.”
“Okay. I’ll come get you.” 
“Jongho.”
“Yeah?”
“Seeing San makes me question myself. I don’t know if that’s good or not.”
“In what way?”
“I just feel ashamed. It makes me wanna look for a different job and leave the club.”
“Well, okay. Are you still happy at the club, or do you wanna do something else?”
“I’m happy but I feel like I could do better.”
“Because of San or because of you? Kinda important to differentiate. If you’re still happy but feel like you could do better for you, then great! But, if you wanna do better just to impress San and do it for him, then no.”
“I feel so stupid. I mean, he drops me off at home. We see each other from time to time–”
“Have sex with each other from time to time–”
“Jongho!”
“What?” He laughs.
“You’re in public!”
“So?! It’s natural human behavior. My god.” He laughs a bit more. “I’m not wrong though.”
“It’s so dumb. I don’t even know what this is. Probably not even something to be questioning my life like this.”
“Has San ever said anything to make you feel that way?”
“No. In fact, he’s supportive about everything and didn’t make me feel terrible about my past decisions.”
“Then you’re overthinking again.” He thanks the staff before grabbing his bag of food. “Y/N, what did I tell you? Just let things be. Don’t make any rash decisions or start assuming things if everything is fine.”
“But is everything fine?”
“It sounds like it to me. He seems like a nice guy. You might wanna have that conversation about what you two are later on if things really haven’t progressed yet, but otherwise, I truly think he’s a nice guy and he’s probably just busy.”
“Jongho–” Suddenly, a few knocks come to your door, throwing you off guard mid-call.
“Guess that’s my cue to go. Text me about tomorrow.”
“Alright.” You say right before ending the call. You set your bowl aside in the kitchen before looking through the peephole on the door. To your surprise [or not], San is standing there on his phone with a small bag in hand.
“Hey.” You say, as you let him in. He smiles, but San doesn’t respond right away with the same enthusiasm. Instead, he shifts his attention to the text that came through on his phone before tucking it away and smiling at you.
“Hey. Sorry.” He hands you a small bag. “I bring pastries.”
“Mm, more pastries.” You tease with a giggle. “Thanks. What brings you here?”
“Sorry, I meant to text you but I forgot. I just wanted to see you since I haven’t been able to for a bit.” He kisses you on the cheek before making his way to your couch.
“Work’s been crazy, hm?” He sighs and leans his head back.
“Uh, yeah. It has been. But, it’s finally the weekend and I can kick back for a bit.” His hand comes up to run your back while you dig through the pastries he bought. “Did you eat already?”
“Mm, yeah. I just made a small salad. I’m not too hungry. Was on the phone with Jongho for a bit.”
“I see. You should eat a little more before your shift.”
“I will.” You look at him. “Are you guys going to the club tonight?” He nods.
“Mingi said he needs it.” You chuckle.
“Do you need it, too?”
“Kinda, but I’m here with you already and I get you all to myself.”
“You do that at the club, too.” You tease.
“Can’t help it.” San quietly looks at you while his arm is loosely around your waist. You observe him for a bit, trying to see if you can read into him or find any obvious signs of what else has been stressing him lately. He’s the same, except more tired, not as talkative or playful like he usually is. Your gut tells you it’s something deeper than work and you’re not sure how you’ll figure him out.
“San.”
“Mhm?” 
“You sure it’s just been work stressing you out?” He leans forward to meet your gaze with a small smile.
“Yeah. I’m sorry I haven’t really been myself lately.”
“No, it’s okay. You don’t have to apologize.”
“I missed you, though. I really missed you.” His finger is tracing soft circles against your hip. He dips forward to place a gentle kiss right below your earlobe, his soft, pink lips sending tingles down your spine. You shouldn’t be buckling this fast around San, but god, does he have you wrapped around his finger. He places a kiss at the corner of your lips and you instantly feel like jelly.
You missed him, too.
And you want him. Badly.
Before you know it, San is sitting up against the wall, watching you bounce on his dick like the good girl you are. He’s watching through hooded eyes; glued to the way your tits bounce, the way his cock slides in and out of you, the way you moan for him like all of this was made for you and you only.
“Fuck.” San groans, hands on your hips to guide you and slam you down onto his length. “You know how to ride me so well.” He watches as you begin to roll your hips against him, taking more control while riding him; it's pure ecstasy. Your moans, your movements, everything about it is just.. addicting. 
You have such a captivating presence, and San can't help but lose himself in you.
“Baby, if you keep working me like that, you’ll make me cum.” He moans, head resting back against the wall. Your hand rests on his neck, giving it a gentle squeeze as you feel yourself bubbling with pleasure. Your clit is rubbing against him deliciously, and you can’t help but sit back and ride him at a different angle. 
“Sannie.” You moan loudly. “Ohhhhshit.” Your words melt together when you suddenly feel yourself unraveling quicker than expected. “I’m cumming— fuck, fuck, fuck—“ You repeat like a mantra, hips working sloppily against him as you come undone; the sounds bouncing off the walls nothing short of pornographic.
“That’s my good girl.” San loves watching the way your face contorts in pleasure, the way you moan loudly, the way he could hear how wet you are. Once you’ve come down from your high, San wastes no time getting you on your fours— face down, ass up. He gives your ass a good knead, spitting onto your pussy before lining himself back up at your entrance. He pushes himself in and works at a steady rhythm, giving your ass a good smack. You let out another moan, tears pricking your lids at how sensitive you’re feeling right now. He’s fucking into you so good, your ass is clapping against him. “You look so good like this, baby. You like it when I fuck you like this, hm?” He gives your ass another smack, cheek red from the impact. “Does it feel good?”
“So good, San.” He moans loudly as he continues to piston into you.
“Your pussy was made for me.” He groans. “Whose is it, Y/N?”
“Y-yours.” You choke, cheek digging deep into the mattress. 
“Louder, babygirl. I can’t hear you.”
“Yours!”
“There you go.” He grunts, ass feeling numb from San fucking into you. The way he’s driving into you and hitting your spot at this angle feels so good, you feel the pleasure bubbling in your pit again. You raise yourself up a bit to rub at your clit, pushing your orgasm forward as San’s movements begin to get sloppy. “Shit, Y/N.”
“San, cum for me.” You egg him on as he begins to pant. Hearing him praise you and call your name pushes you over the edge once more, hands gripping at the sheets while you shudder from the second orgasm taking over. San quickly pulls out and unloads onto your ass, back.
“God.” He huffs as he gives himself one last pump and pants heavily. “So good for me. You okay, pretty girl?” His hand comes up your back, leaving a random trail of kisses along the way.
“Yeah.” You let out a breath.
“Let me clean you up. Don’t move.” He quickly runs to your bathroom to grab some wipes. “Gonna be kinda cold. I’m sorry.” He apologizes in advance before taking a wipe to your back.
“That feels kinda nice.” San chuckles, allowing you to lay back on your bed first before slipping in next to you post-cleanup.
“You feel nice.” You laugh, laying your head on his chest while he grabs his phone.
“So, what time are you guys heading to the club tonight?”
“I don’t know. Probably between 9-10pm?” 
“You know there’s an event tonight, right?”
“I heard.” San laughs. “Some male dancers are guesting at the club?”
“Yeah. They’ll be on the second stage, though.” San nods, a few texts coming into his phone. You can’t help but glaze over the previews, back to back texts coming in from a ‘Noelle.’ The messages aren’t too lengthy, but she is texting him quite a few times and the previews alone are enough to make your stomach twist and turn.
It’s making you anxious, and for some reason, your gut tells you this Noelle is significant to San. 
He’s not trying to pay attention to it right now though, and it’s probably just because he’s in your company post-sex. He briefly looks at the messages at the top, thumb coming up to swipe them away. 
“Is it just you guys?” You ask, wondering if San would open up to you otherwise.
“Uh, yeah. Pretty sure. Unless Mingi invites other people.”
“Mmm, okay.”
“I’m excited to see you on stage again.” He looks down at you with a smirk. 
“Yeah right.”
“Swear. Everyone knows I’m only there for you. It’s kinda nice to show it off.”
“Show what off?”
“That you’re mine.” He winks, making your heart melt into a puddle. You hate that San gives you these signals, but there hasn’t been much to it besides seeing each other occasionally outside of the club and fucking each other’s brains out. 
“Don’t say shit you don’t mean.”
“Who said I didn’t mean it?!” You shake your head and turn to your side, now going through your own phone. San gives you a kiss on the shoulders, hand coming up to rub your arm while he continues to plant random kisses at the nape of your neck, below your ear, jaw.
“Sannie, what are you doing?” You giggle, ticklish from the feeling of his lips against your skin.
“Kinda want you again.”
“Are you serious?” You turn to look at him and he smirks.
“Can’t help it. You drive me crazy.” His hand comes down to your thigh, giving it a squeeze. “Wanna keep taking care of you.”
“Do you, now?” You tease, letting San continue to kiss you; hand coming down and ghosting your clit. You decide to let San have you once more before he’s struggling to part from your lips, even as he’s about to head out the door. 
You blush watching him leave, excited to show off and see him tonight.
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The night comes rather quickly because the club is incredibly packed with all sorts of people making their way in to see all of the dancers. You’re having to entertain on stage, deliver drinks and give a few private dances. It’s nothing beyond what you’re already used to doing, but the clientele is booming tonight and you’re constantly moving around all ends of the club.
It’s a little past 10pm when you catch wind of Mingi, Hongjoong, San and Wooyoung. And for a minute, your eyes light up. San immediately plops onto a chair, legs spread as he smirks. He gestures for you to come over with his finger and lightly taps his lap, making you giggle to yourself while you continue to perform a few tricks on the pole. 
“Gorgeous.” San eyes the high-cut bodysuit sitting on your body, showing off all your curves beautifully. 
“You made it.” You crouch down in front of him, hands trailing up his legs.
“Of course, why would I miss out some more?” He winks, stuffing a few bills in the slit of your bodysuit while you stand lean towards his ear. 
“Can I get you something to drink?”
“You?” You laugh.
“Cliché.”
“Kidding, baby.” He bites onto his bottom lip. “Can we get shots of whiskey?”
“All four of you?”
“Yes please, pretty lady.” Hongjoong smirks. “Bodysuit looks good on you.”
“Openly hitting on San’s woman is crazy.” Wooyoung laughs loudly.
“Just complimenting her.” 
“Yeah, keep it up.” San teases Hongjoong.
“Thank you. I’ll be back.” You smile at Hongjoong before stepping over to the bar to grab their shots. At this point, it feels like everything happens so quickly; the following moments, the rest of the night— all a blur. When you return to the four, they’ve added a few more to the group. And this time, it’s a group of 5 girls— one that is in a heated conversation with San off to the side. You slow your pace, watching as she clings around his waist, but he gently shoves her off and shakes his head. He heads back to his seat and she welcomes herself on his lap, ignoring everything that he had just done to her moments ago. San doesn’t seem entirely pleased being that he’s been trying to distance himself from her, but to no avail— you’ve already returned and he panics.
“Here.” You hand them their drinks, handing San’s last.
“Noelle, seriously. Can you please get off my lap?” Noelle. You can’t help but feel your heart fall to the pit of your stomach, though you’re trying your best to brush it off in the heat of the moment. 
“You’re such a killjoy.” She whines, sitting on the edge of the chair. 
“Thank you, love.” His look is unreadable when he reaches for his glass and so is yours. But, San knows you saw everything and he knows it all looks wrong. It, all of this, must seem so fucked up to you right now and he wishes he could just pull you aside to clear up the air.
“Thank you, Miss Crimson.” Mingi raises his shot glass to you.
“Is that the stripper San is into?” You overhear one of the girls ask, followed by a:
“He’s not serious, right? Her?” Noelle scoffs and you subtly roll your eyes, getting ready to head back to the bartender. You weren’t gonna let this girl get to you. Not today.
“Have a good night.” Is what you tell Wooyoung in passing, making him flash San a look shortly afterwards.
“Don’t think she’s too happy about Noelle being here.”
“I didn’t know they were actually coming either.” San glares at him, trying his best to shake off Noelle and continue to create some distance. He truthfully didn’t think Noelle and her friends were coming along. Mingi had briefly mentioned the event to them, sliding in a stupid joke about how much San loves coming solely because of you. She didn’t take it lightly, hence why she decided to come along even though their initial plan was to head to the regular club down the street. 
When San sees Noelle, he’s pretty irritated. The last time she was texting him, she was blowing up his phone about shit from the past and their relationship. Quite frankly, he no longer has energy to deal with her and he’s tired of the back and forth. He doesn’t wanna start any issues tonight since it seems too late to brush them off and he doesn’t wanna dampen the mood. He knows how clingy she gets and he knows how she can act when she feels him slowly slipping from her grip, especially if they’re together in person. The last thing San wanted to do was upset you, nor did he want you to think of him as an asshole who only wanted you for one thing. 
That was not his plan.
He knows you’re not happy and he knows he fucked up for even trying to brush this off, for hiding Noelle when he had no reason to.
“You aren’t actually into the stripper are you?” She questions San and he furrows his brows.
“It literally isn’t any of your business.”
“Wow, so you are? I came out tonight, hoping we could—”
“Oh god, enough of that shit. Not here.” Wooyoung sighs. “Let’s go enjoy ourselves, that’s the whole point of tonight, right?” Wooyoung tries to push his bestfriend to the main stage, leaving the girls to enjoy the men on the second stage. You’ve continued to deliver a few drinks around the other room before stepping back onto the main stage. In your peripherals, you can see San eyeing you; almost pleading for you to swing by his way.
Except, you don’t, and you start to entertain a few men on the other side of the stage. San feels his blood boil a little when he sees you giving your attention to another man, knowing full well you were doing this on purpose.
And you were. You weren’t exactly sorry about it.
Because you didn’t have time for this bullshit, and your job still needed to get done. At the end of the day, you are just a dancer. What more could you be to him? You temporarily feed into their fantasies, nothing more, nothing less.
The reality is hitting you more and more tonight.
It makes you feel stupid for having thought otherwise, for letting the possibility live longer than it should’ve.
You’re not sure if you have time to entertain someone who has all that baggage.
San comes around to see you in better view, watching as you crouch down with your legs cocked open; swiping two fingers across your tongue before running it over your [barely] clothed pussy. San clenches his jaw when the man in front of you leans forward with a huge smirk on his lips, holding a roll of bills in his hand.
“Uh oh.” Wooyoung instigates. “I told you so. In true Choi San fashion.”
“Stop that.” Wooyoung shrugs.
“Noelle’s here, hoping she could be the one to go home with you tonight. And that one—“ He points at you over his glass. “Thinks you’re toying with her emotions. Pick a fucking battle.”
“I already told you I was done with the whole Noelle thing. She doesn’t get it for whatever reason.” San slightly groans and clicks his teeth. “Why did Mingi invite them, anyway?”
“I don’t know? I can’t control that boy’s mouth. Besides, you know he’s been trying to get with Donna after those dates didn’t go well.” San sees you dip into a private booth with the guy, shutting the curtains closed without looking his way. He takes a sip of his drink, stepping closer to the stage to try and enjoy himself– ignoring the possibilities of what’s going on behind that curtain.
The club feels suffocating, and he wants out.
Especially when you seem to be taking your time in the booth.
“You wanna head out? Noelle and the girls wanna head down the street now. Said they’re bored of the guys already.” Mingi asks, pointing at the girls getting ready to head out to the next club down the street. 
“Already?” Hongjoong cocks a brow up. “We literally just got here.”
“Yeah, I guess they’re over it.”
“I mean, whatever. Just don’t ask me to leave the other club hella early.” Joong rolls his eyes. “Whose bright fucking idea was to invite them anyway?” He glares at Mingi.
“Sorry! I wanted to be nice and extend the invite. I didn’t think they’d be over it so quickly.”
“Right, you wanted to be nice and get into Donna’s pants.”
“Do you wanna stay back?” Wooyoung asks in San’s ear, but all San can do is shrug. “We don’t have to go with them.”
“Let’s just go, I’ll never hear the end of it if we stay back.” Wooyoung simply looks at him in return.
“Let’s go!” Mingi yells. San subtly looks back to try and see if you’re out of the booth, but Mingi is already shoving him towards the door– towards Noelle and her friends.
“Choi San, hurry up!” Noelle whines as she waits for him.
“Noelle, you don’t have to wait for me. You can go with your friends.”
“Why are you acting so mean tonight?” She tugs on his wrist, but he snatches it out of her grip. “It definitely can’t be about her, right?”
“Go have fun with your friends and I’ll worry about my own.” San doesn’t mean to sound like an asshole, but he’s truly tired of the back and forth between Noelle. He hates that she acts this way, and he hates that she’s here. He feels like the night has gone to waste because he won’t be able to fully enjoy himself.
On top of that, you’re livid with him.
Speaking of you— You’ve kept yourself close to the pole even though your client has asked you for a lap dance. Once, twice, maybe even thrice. He’s attractive, but your mind is glued to San and how terrible this night ended up playing out for you. Luckily, the client doesn’t seem to fight much against it; as long as he gets his fix of you somehow, he’ll take it. Tonight’s one of those nights where you’ll stay for the full 45 to get the extra money, to hide away from the rest of the crowd. 
One, two.
Twirl around the pole.
Three, four.
Invert and lean back.
Five, six.
Gently fall into the splits.
Seven, eight.
Bounce your ass on the stage. 
“You’re a fucking goddess.” He says, gently palming himself through his pants, forcing you to mask the disgust you feel watching him openly do that. Though, you’ve seen worse and you’ve trained yourself to have the thick skin needed in this industry. Right now, it hits differently. Because of San, because of Noelle.
Because of everything.
“You sure you can’t come down here and get on daddy’s lap? I think I’ve slipped you enough money to at least get a lapdance.”
“Sorry, not doing that tonight, love.” 
“Aw, why not? Not even for me?”
“Not for you. Or them.” You say, bending over to at least give him a peek of what he wants.
“You sure you’re not saving it all for someone else?”
“Nope.”
“Gonna have to come back on a better night then.” He bites his bottom lip. “You’re my favorite. I swear you drive me crazy.” The statement is enough to trigger San’s voice in your head, causing you to rush through the last bit of your pole dance before thanking the man for his time and tip.
When you step out of the booth, you no longer see San and his group and it instantly makes your heart clench. You didn’t know what to expect tonight, but you definitely didn’t expect San to leave so quickly with his friends—
With Noelle and her friends.
Now, you’re back to square one. You feel like a mere distraction, something that temporarily fills the void; nothing more, nothing less. You quickly head to the back to get some air and a moment to yourself, finding a few texts from San:
san: Y/N, i’m sorry. i didn’t know they were coming. mingi just invited them and didn’t really say anything about it.
san: i know you’re probably wondering about her and i can explain. it’s really not what it looks like. 
san: let me know when you’re off? i wanna take you home still. 
san: i wanna talk to you and see you. please.
You swallow the lump in your throat as you shut off the phone and ignore the texts. Even if you wanted to answer back, even if it fucking pains you to re-run through those texts, you keep your head up and throw on a brave face for the rest of your shift.
San is still your kryptonite, and you aren’t sure where to go from here.
You need to leave quickly enough to avoid running into San tonight. 
Guess you’d be taking your usual walk alone. 
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You managed to dodge San and his friends on your way home that one awful night, ignoring his calls even as you’ve gotten comfy and tucked in your bed. San continued to blow up your phone into the next day until he realized you weren’t gonna answer him anytime soon.
And it sucked.
But, you needed to hold your ground. You needed to go back to the Y/N who worried about her own, the Y/N who didn’t let anything faze her even if she was hurt by loved ones, by friends.
You needed to go back to the Y/N who kept it real with herself and was proud of how far she’s come despite the ups and downs.
You hadn’t seen San come to the club, and it was probably his way of giving you the space that you indirectly asked for. And indeed, you needed this.
You needed to go back to the old Y/N and reprioritize.
“Hey baby.” Mia says, hand on the small of your back as you dab a bit of lip gloss onto your lips.
“Hey.”
“How’re you doing?” She brushes your hair back and gives you a small, sympathetic smile.
“I’ve seen better days.” You let out a chuckle.
“You haven’t texted him back?” You shake your head.
“No. I don’t really know what to say. I just feel kinda dumb. Maybe we were just meant to be a thing in passing.”
“Don’t say that. I know he had some feelings for you, and I know the situation was unique. But, nobody would go through all that effort if it didn’t matter to them.”
“Mm, yeah, He just has some baggage he has to deal with and I don’t think I have time or energy for that.”
“For all you know, it could just be her.”
“But, why hasn’t he officially let her go then?” Mia pouts a bit.
“I think he’s over it. He didn’t seem all that interested in her at all.” She nods. “Talk to him, hun. Let him explain. It might just be a misunderstanding.”
“Yeah, maybe.” She gives you a reassuring smile.
“Whenever you’re ready.”
“I know, babe. Thanks.” You give her a toothless smile, letting out a small squeal when she slaps your ass.
“Now get out there and do your thing, the clients are waiting.” You chuckle and shake your head, taking one last look in the mirror before you head out to the main stage. You strut your way across the floor, doing your usual sweet talk with a few of the men lining the stage. You take the stage for a bit and do your usual routine, letting them slip their bills wherever they can under your gear, or shower the stage with a few more extra tips. Just as you were getting into the swing of things, you catch San walking in by himself. You almost lose track of your thoughts, distracted by how good he looks. He’s sporting simple slacks and a gray-striped button up with chelsea boots, rolex on his wrist. He looks around the club before his eyes land on yours, and you suddenly feel like you’ve lost the ability to move, to dance.
▹ FLASHBACK
“I’ve never seen you this sulky. It’s kinda annoying.” Wooyoung plops next to San on the couch, watching as he slouches and lazily texts back on his phone.
“Fuck off.”
“I’m assuming she’s not answering your texts or calls yet?”
“Nope.”
“Down bad.”
“Are you here to help or to get on my nerve?” San glares at his bestfriend.
“Why don’t you just go see her?”
“I don’t wanna cross boundaries and be in her space, especially if she’s already not answering my texts or calls.”
“Maybe this is what she needs, though. She’s probably still assuming shit about Noelle. Which, by the way, I hope you ended it. For real.”
“I did. That’s why she was hella upset during the last half of the club and I left.”
“I thought you left to go after Y/N. Where exactly did you go?” 
“I mean, partially. I was gonna go after her and bring her home, but I was too late. The other half of me was pissed off because Noelle kept crying and trying to gaslight me. I told her I didn’t wanna do this anymore. Was tired of it. I told her we just don’t work and it’s time for us to move on.”
“‘Bout time you realized.” Wooyoung rolls his eyes. “I know you have love for her and I know she meant a lot to you, but that girl is crazy. You continued to feed into it, too.”
“Yeah, well.” 
“Just go see Y/N, dude. You look terrible.” San flips him off. “I mean it. If you want shit to change, then keep taking initiative.”
“I just don’t wanna scare her off. I already fucked up enough with this whole Noelle thing.”
“Damn, what did Y/N do to you?” Wooyoung laughs. “I truly didn’t think you’d end up finding your boo thing at the strip club. I’d like another thank you if this all goes well.” He smirks. “Thank you Wooyoung for making us go to the club on my birthday.” He says in a sing-song tone.
“Yeah, yeah.” San sighs. “I’ll probably head to the club tonight and try to talk to her.”
“Want me to come? Moral support.” He shakes his head.
“Thanks, but I think I’ll be good.”
▹ END
You quickly head off the stage and head to the bar, switching gears to take a break from the stage. You scurry along, hoping you aren’t making it too obvious that you’re trying to deflect and avoid San yet again. 
But, he knows. 
“Y/N, hey. Wait.” San says as you brush past him, hand gently coming to your wrist. You wiggle out of his grip, giving him a look as you continue on to the next room. “Y/N.” He continues to call, hurriedly following after you. “Y/N, please.” He says as he comes to your side while you gather a few drinks onto your tray.
“San, what? I’m working.” You respond, still keeping your attention to the drinks.
“Why haven’t you been answering my texts or calls?”
“Because.”
“Because, what? I didn’t mean to leave early without saying anything to you that night. I wanted to come back and take you home.”
“Oh, but Noelle didn’t let you, right?” 
“Y/N, please don’t do that. That’s not even what happened—” San has his hand around your wrist again, his eyes pleading for you to hear him out. 
“Aye, come on, my guy.” An unfamiliar man from the crowd comes in between you and San, ripping his hand away from your wrist. “Care to share? Stop being so selfish and gatekeeping her—”
“The fuck are you?”
“I see you come into this club with your friends, acting all high and mighty. You heard what I said.” He steps closer towards San. “Stop being so fucking selfish with her, hm? She’s for the crowd, baby’s meant to be shared—” The man suddenly slaps your ass and it turns a switch on for San. San pushes him away, causing the other man to lose his footing before attempting to swing at him.
“Stop that!” You try to yell, hoping it’d somehow break them apart. San is quick to dodge the first swing, but he gets unlucky with the second. San is quick to regain his composure, throwing a punch to him and causing him to fall to the ground. He towers over him and continues to lay a few more punches while you yell at security for assistance. “Quit it! San, stop! Stop it!” You repeat, prying him off of the man on the floor. “San!” You grip his bicep and pull him back.
“Fucking idiot.” San spits, hand coming to his jaw to ease the soreness. 
“Get them out of here!” You tell security and San furrows his brows at you.
“Y/N—”
“Out. Now!” You repeat yourself, following after security as they get their hands on both San and the other guy, escorting them out of the club. One shoves the other man through the front entrance, while the other shoves San out of the side entrance. You’re already following behind, signaling for security that it’s okay for him to leave you alone with San. He gives you a curt nod as he walks around the corner— giving you enough distance that allows privacy, but also allows him to step in if necessary. “What the fuck are you doing?!”
“I wasn’t gonna let him talk about you like that, Y/N. Don’t ask me that fucking question.”
“It’s my job.” You remind him. “I meant what are you doing here?! Why did you come here, San?”
“I came here to talk to you!” His tone raises. “You aren’t answering my texts or calls, and all I wanna do is make this right. What do you expect me to do?”
“Let it go.”
“Why would I do that?”
“Because, San. What is it to you, anyway?”
“Are you serious?” He sighs, running his hand through his hair. “If you would just give me one second to talk to you—“ He pauses and lets out a frustrated sigh. “Y/N. All I want to do is talk to you and explain. I don’t wanna leave things like this.” He lowers his voice and steps closer to you.
“Then talk.” You cross your arms and shift your weight from one foot to another.
“Y/N, me and Noelle are done with. We’ve been done with for awhile. She’s my ex and we’ve gone through some shit but it’s over with.” He lets out a breath, the air cold and crisp against your skin. “Mingi invited them that night, and I just didn’t wanna cause any issues between us and ruin the night. She threw herself on me and I had been asking her to stop. I didn’t ask her to do that, nor did I want to entertain it. I shouldn’t have left with them though, I knew how that would look, too. I’m sorry. I promise you it meant nothing. I even told Noelle she needed to move on that night. I came back to the club, but you had already left.”
“San.” You shake your head. “Why?”
“Why, what?”
“Why me?”
“Y/N, I really do like you.”
“But, that’s the problem. You don’t even see the issue with this.”
“What issue?!
“Us! That’s the fucking issue, San! We come from such different lives, does that not bother you? We’ll never be on the same page, we’ll never work.” San furrows his brows, trying his hardest to take the blow even though it hurts to.
“Why would you say it like that? I don’t care about how different our lives are. That doesn’t matter to me–”
“It does to me!”
“Why?! I don’t care what people think and so shouldn’t you! Wouldn’t we be enough?”
“It’s so easy for you to say because you don’t know what it’s like to be on my side of things.”
“Then, let me know!” San raises his voice before running his hand through his hair. “Y/N, I would never take advantage of you. Never in my mind did I ever think of you that way. Why won’t you let me be here for you?”
“Because San, you had me thinking I was stupid. I felt like you were here for one thing, and it made me question everything about myself, my life. I hated feeling that way. I even compared myself to Noelle at one point.”
“She’s nothing to me! I’m sorry for having hid that from you, but I didn’t think much of it at the time since the whole thing caught me off guard. She means nothing to me, and we’re done with. I’m sorry.” For some reason, you are torn. You want to believe San, and there is a small part of you that does. However, you still can’t get over the fact that he still kept her close for lord knows how long. What if he was balancing you both at the same time? How could you know he was for sure over her and that this wasn’t just a phase?
“What if this is just a phase to you, huh? What happens when you realize how much we don’t work? That we’re just too different? That maybe she or someone else is a better fit for you all along.” Your bottom lip trembles and even though you try to hide it, San catches on. “This is my life, and it won’t change for awhile.”
“Stop putting words in my mouth and choosing how I should feel. That’s not how this works. I caught feelings for you, Y/N. Genuinely. None of our differences mattered to me, and it won’t ever. I’m sorry you felt that way and that was never my intention.” San says calmly, but god, is he terrified right now. He is anxious. Nervous. Scared. And as much as you wanna cave, you remember you are outside of the club in the freezing cold.
Arguing with San.
“San, you know what? This is enough.”
“Y/N.” He pleads through his tone.
“Please just go home.” You point at the side door before nervously rubbing at your sides. “We should talk about this another time. Not here.”
“O-okay, so are you gonna answer my texts or calls then?”
“I’ll text you, okay?” You look at him with some remorse. Right now, you don’t think you’re ready to talk to him and you probably need to sort out your thoughts before the next time. Or else, you’ll continue to try blaming him, the situation. You’ll continue to deflect, you’ll continue to let San’s words brush over your head because you aren’t used to this genuine attention— these genuine feelings, genuine intentions.
San doesn’t say anything else, but his expression makes your heart break more. You let out a sigh before turning on your heel to get back into the club and finish your shift. As soon as the door shuts and acts as a barrier between you two, a few tears escape your lids. You quickly brush them away and shake off the feelings, storming out onto the main stage to finish your night strongly.
You need Jongho.
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“This fucking sucks.” You tuck your knees to your chest as Jongho sighs and pours you another shot of tequila.
“Why don’t you text him, Y/N? Just talk to him.”
“I’m kinda scared. And nervous.” You take the shot with him.
“Why? He’s literally waiting for you to text him. You’ve just been big sad over him too, don’t you think that’s a sign?”
“What am I supposed to say?”
“Oh, I don’t know, ‘hey, can we talk?’ maybe?” Jongho gives you a look before shaking his head. “I love you, but dude. Get it together. You should just talk to him and stop putting yourself through this. You obviously like the guy and he feels the same way. The whole thing with his ex was just a misunderstanding, too. What exactly are you trying to put off?”
“I think I’m just scared. You know how it was with my ex. He wasn’t nice and also made me feel ridiculously stupid and incompetent for my decisions. Even after the break up.”
“Yeah, but he’s your ex for a reason. San is not the same person.” Jongho pours you another shot. “I understand you’re scared. But, you can’t shield yourself off from everything forever. I truly think he’s a genuinely nice guy.”
“Plus, I worry about him too. How would his friends feel about us being serious? His family, his sister?” 
“I’m sure it’ll all be fine. San isn’t even worried about that, nor does he seem to care. It doesn’t matter where you come from. They should be able to see what kind of person you are and the heart you have.” 
“Mm, yeah. I just worry too much. I don’t want my life to bleed into his and ruin the shit he’s built for himself.”
“It won’t. Jeez, you aren’t a criminal Y/N. You’re great at everything you do and you’re incredibly talented. You have a lot of qualities that could take you far.” There’s another pause, enough for you and Jongho to take the last shot to the neck before you pull out your phone and click on San’s text thread.
“Fuck it.”
“Exactly.” He sips on some soda to wash down the tequila burn. “By the way, I’m never talking about you that way again.” Jongho visibly shudders, making you playfully hit him on the shoulder. 
you: hi, sorry for the random text. can we talk?
You toss your phone aside and dig your face into your hands, nervous about the text back. Granted, it’s only been close to a week and a half after the whole thing went down at the club. Time moves so fast that part of you felt terrible for making San wait in general. But, it should be a testimony to how he truly feels about you.
“What if he’s over it?” You groan into your hands.
“Then at least you know, right? You can close that chapter and move on.” Jongho takes a bite of his chicken. “Highly doubt it though.” At this point, the phone dings behind Jongho and he’s quick to grab it for you— flashing you San’s name on the screen.
“Fuck.” You whine.
san: hey. don’t apologize. of course we can. should i swing by your place soon?
“I’ll drop you off in a bit.”
“Are you sure you’re good? I can ask him to pick me up.”
“Actually, yeah. Ask him.” You chuckle as Jongho pours another shot for himself.
you: yeah, but i’m at jongho’s. do you think you can pick me up?
san: yeah i can, love. just send me the address.
“He always gets so sweet. I can’t do this.” You send San Jongho’s address.
“Yes you can!” Jongho responds. “Here, drink.” He pushes your water glass towards you. “So you don’t feel like shit later.”
san: on my way. 20 mins.
“Thanks for the food and drinks. For letting me be a crybaby. You know, the whole nine.” Jongho chuckles and nudges you on the arm.
“I got you, dude. You’re my bestfriend. I won’t let you go through these things alone.” 
“I guess I’ll keep you updated?”
“Take your time. And just be honest with him, alright? Be straight up about how you feel with everything.”
“I will.” 
When San arrives a bit after 20 minutes, you grab your things and bid your bestfriend farewell. You feel nervous, palms sweating the more you fiddle with your fingers and head down the steps to San’s car. Once you catch wind of him, you pause in your steps just to give yourself a tiny breather before committing and approaching his passenger door. He’s in a black shirt and sweats, glasses sitting on the bridge of his nose. 
“Hey.” You say as you climb in, San giving you a small smile.
“Hey. You good to go?” You buckle your seatbelt and nod, allowing San to drive off to your studio. “Did you work at the shop today?”
“Mhm, I worked an earlier shift to get off at the same time as Jongho.”
“You guys just hung out?”
“Yep. Drank, ate some food. Talked about some things.”
“Some things?”
“You.” You give him a look and he nods.
“Fair enough.”
“What have you been up to?”
“Work. I’ve been working from home lately since there isn’t much requiring me to come into the office.”
“Been busy?”
“Yup, but I’ve seen worse days.” 
“I’m sorry.”
“No need to apologize.” He lets out a small chuckle as he continues to drive on. The rest of the drive to your place is quiet, but nothing feels weird or awkward. It’s surprisingly a comfortable silence and it’s probably due to the fact that you two have missed each other even though you’re both still trying to gather your thoughts.
When he pulls up into a spot on the street, San shuts off the car and immediately runs to your side to help you out. He follows behind as you lead the way, quietly unlocking your door and tossing the keys off to the side. San sits on your couch and lets out a sigh, watching as you plop next to him after grabbing some water.
“Want anything else to drink?”
“I’m okay.” He gives you a small smile. You turn to face him, a leg tucked under the other that’s swung over the edge of the couch.
“Thanks for picking me up.”
“Of course.”
“Can we talk about what’s been happening? I just really need you to be honest with me, that’s all I ask.”
“I’ll always be honest with you, Y/N. It was never my intention to make it seem otherwise.”
“Well, after everything, I did feel pretty stupid. You knew I was already doubting myself after I lost my family and friends because of my decisions. For a second, I felt like you tricked me and that I was stupid not to realize you only wanted me for one thing.” San shakes his head, but he continues to let you talk. “I started questioning myself more and I hated the feeling. I knew I couldn’t be enough for you, or that I was completely different from girls in your past. And it felt terrible. I couldn’t help but jump to conclusions that night because who am I compared to her? I’m living such a different life and I honestly wouldn’t blame you if you realized that.” You shrug. “Anyway, I felt shitty because I genuinely had feelings for you even though I was scared. I still am, especially because I don’t know if this is just a phase or what.” You feel the tears pricking your bottom lids again but you do your best to prevent San from catching on. You look down at your hands, fiddling with your sweater sleeves. You feel San shift closer to you, his hand coming up to your cheek.
“Can you look at me please?” Your eyes shift back up to him, and you feel the butterflies in your stomach the moment you two lock eyes. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way.” He says softly, his thumb caressing your cheek. “I really didn’t mean to. That whole thing Noelle—” He sighs. “I’m not gonna lie, it’s been a ride with her. But meeting you and getting to know you made me realize how much I didn’t wanna be stuck in that anymore. It made me realize how much I craved normalcy with someone, something that doesn’t have to be so sad and toxic all the damn time.” He lets out a breath. “I know it sounds dumb that it took me all of this to realize, but I mean it. You make me feel things I haven’t felt in such a long time. It feels good.” He does a subtle nod. “I feel happy and good around you.”
“San, you just scare me.” A few tears stream down your cheeks and San is the first to catch them; gently wiping it away while he keeps his eyes locked onto yours. “Our lives are so different, I can’t help but worry about how this is gonna make things turn out in the future. Your family, your friends—”
“My friends are fine, they know how I feel about you. And my family knows they can’t dictate everything about my life. You—” He pauses. “Y/N, you aren’t any different just because of what you do. What matters is the kind of person you are, how you genuinely make me feel. None of that matters.”
“You know it isn’t gonna be that easy.”
“So be it. I know you’re scared, but I’m with you on this.” He runs his other thumb across your lip. “We can figure this out, okay? We can take this slow and figure it out together. I’ll stop heading to the club with the guys and be there for you in many other ways. Just know that I’m gonna support you no matter what, I’m not like everyone else. Fuck all of them.” He gives you a small, reassuring smile. “I’m sorry.” He repeats. You can’t help but lean into his hand and let out a shaky breath, kissing the palm of his hand before returning your gaze on him. His smile grows, making him plant an eager kiss on your forehead, to the tip of your nose.
Lips.
“Are we okay?” He whispers against your lips and you nod. “Can I have you then?” He whispers against your lips in between another kiss. “Make it up to you?” Another kiss. “Show you how I really feel?” You nod, giving San leverage to scoop you into his arms and carry you to your bed. He gently lays you down and is quick to shed off your clothes, admiring every inch of you. San tosses his glasses onto your nightstand before placing random trails of kisses along your body, kissing every scar, every curve, every tattoo; everything about you still continues to drive him crazy. Today, San takes his time. Though he’s eager to show you how you make him feel, he decides he’s gonna take his time with you. 
Even when he laps at your pussy, your clit, making you cum within minutes of being positioned in between your thighs.
Even when he rocks his hips into you— it’s a slow and steady pace, enough to make you feel every inch of him.
Even when he sits back onto his knees, letting you ride him.
His hands run up your sides while your hands are tangled in his hair, rolling your hips against him steadily, slowly, letting him feel every inch of you. He moans against your neck before placing wet kisses on the surface, hands now gripping tighter as he feels himself nearing his high. Everything is so intimate, so raw, so close— San can’t keep his lips off of you and hearing your moans bounce off of the walls adds to the pleasure. Your clit is rubbing deliciously against him, causing you to bite onto his bottom lip before tilting your head back in pleasure.
“Gonna cum, baby.” He groans in between open-mouthed kisses. “Be my good girl and cum with me.” You furrow your brows in pleasure, hands gripping his jaw as you continue to deeply kiss him, your climax heightening at your gut.
“Sannie.” You whine, unable to form any thoughts.
“You know how to fuck me so well. You’re perfect.” He hisses, the pleasure almost feeling too intense with how much he’s having to hold back. You start to rock your hips at a messier pace when you feel yourself climbing, moan loudly and gripping the ends of San’s hair when you finally come undone. He almost whines when he feels you twitch against him, hissing at how good you feel wrapped around him. San quickly lays you back and pounds into you, releasing his seed and painting your walls white. 
The both of you stay stationary for a second, panting and regulating your breathing once you’ve come back down from cloud nine. San brushes the hair away from your face and adoringly looks into your eyes, placing a kiss on your lips before slowly sliding himself out of you.
“Let’s get cleaned up.” He jogs over to your bathroom and turns on the shower, waiting for the water to reach a perfect temperature before grabbing you. 
While in the shower, San makes sure to lather your body with soap, giving your back and shoulders a good massage before rinsing off. You follow suit, giggling when you plop a few bubbles on his nose and cheeks. The best thing about the shower is that San doesn’t pressure you for more, no. He showers you with kisses, surely showing you just exactly what you mean to him through the action alone.
After the shower, you climb into bed with San, letting him take you into his arms while you turn on some music to softly fill the background. He gently strokes your hair, and hums along, keeping you close in his warm embrace.
“San.”
“Yeah?”
“You know what I want to do in the future?”
“What’s that?”
“I wanna own my own dance studio and teach. Help people grow their confidence and embrace their sexiness.” San chuckles. “You know? People get shy about these things or hide because they feel like they can’t dance or be sexy.”
“You’d be an amazing teacher for that.” You giggle.
“Hopefully one day.”
“We’ll make it happen. No matter how long it takes, hm?” He hums. “I got you.” You look up at San and stare at the galaxies he holds in those beautiful, brown orbs. What you did to deserve someone like San, you’ll never know— but you’ll take it as a gift from the universe; a gift that shows how proud the universe is of you for never giving up and for staying true to yourself.
For once, everything feels right. Everything seems to be where it should be. Everything in your life, as it is now, is what’s meant to be. And out of all the changes the universe has brought you, you’re at least thankful for this; for that moment San walked into the club, for the moment you took the first leap.
“You got me?” You tease and he nods.
“I got you.”
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▹ taglist: @itsvxlentine @vantediary @certifiedmoa @asjkdk @bintificreads @frobin4ever @persphonesorchid
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avantalem · 8 months ago
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SONG MINGI FIC RECS
some of my favourite mingi fics :)
ateez masterlist
Skinny Dipping by byuntrash101
Use It by a-soft-hornytiny
Starring Role + CS by nonclassyparty
This Night Together + JYH by honeyhotteoks
Panini - JYH by smileysuh
Counting Stars by min-gis
Jealous by cyberpxnk
8th Grade + JYH by smileysuh
Bubble Boy by milfgyuu
Hard Hours
Punishment by hongism
Slowly, I’m going down by yutasbellybuttonpiercing
Fic Rec List
After Like by sluttywoozi
All In by tenelkadjowrites
Django by hongism
Audio
Chosen For Heaven by shinescape
Scandalous by mphountitled
Be With You by writerpetals (i picture mingi thats why its listed here lol)
Seven by sluttywoozi
Yeehaw by desirehorizon 
P Drunk by beenbaanbuun
Under the sheets
Natal Chart Analysis
Quickie
if you have any reccomendations please comment!
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jjoongstar · 4 months ago
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❝LOLA'S LIBRARY❞✰.。.✵°✵,¸.•✵´
my personal list of all of my fav fics that i really love and would like to reread again for fun. i'll always continue to add more on this list. NONE OF THESE WOKRS ARE MINE!!!
smut🔥| fluff ☁️| angst 💧| most fav & highly rec❤️‍🔥
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★¸.•☆•.¸★ ATEEZ ★⡀.•☆•.★
love you goodbye 🔥💧[psh] breakup sex, i legit cried
intertwined☁️[psh] mermaid y/n, siren seonghwa
sleep talker🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[psh] enemies to lovers, one bed trope, vacation au, love the tension & plot
royal library🔥☁️[psh] royalty au, plot twist, legit ult fav, mak lurve giler
(not so) sweet dream☁️[psh] very fluffy, snuggling hihihshs
Red Dress🔥☁️[psh] enemies to lovers, amazing plot
You Come First🔥☁️[psh] drug dealer, dom!hwa went too far, y/n used safe word
Make Me Water🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[psh] friends to lovers, lots of giggling
prefect and t(h)reats🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[psh] harry potter au, slytherin hwa x hufflepuff y/n
I Know It's Over☁️💧❤️‍🔥[psh] historical au, tragic ending, cliche storyline but i cried anyways
The General's Wife☁️❤️‍🔥[psh] possessive military general husband hwa
The Way To His Heart (series)☁️💧❤️‍🔥[psh] joseon era, general sh, arranged marriage, amazing plot, scrumptious storyline, sngt lurve gilerr frr
She's a regular here... (pt.1)🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[psh] drug dealer, legit fav, trilogy
Use me like a drug! (pt.2)🔥☁️[psh]
Baby we're high on you. (pt.3)🔥☁️[psh, khj]
opposite attracts🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[psh,khj] addams!matz, love the plot
One Day At A Time☁️💧[psh, jyh] royal au, most heartbreaking fic ever, i legit cried ffs, there's comfort at the end
mafia☁️[khj, jwy] mafia au, love the part where she slept on hj's bed
pretty🔥[khj] pure steamy smut, no plot
training wheels🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[khj] prof hj x student y/n, taught her how to suck his cock, ft. woo
Ugh, As If🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[khj] ult fav, y/n has insomnia & he helped her , sngt lurve yurr
Loyalties☁️[khj] criminal hj x detective y/n, love the chemistry, had me giggling, kinda reminds me of sanzu
Dreamy (series)🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[khj] dilf hj, bestie sh's daughter, legit ult fav ever, literally drooling, i love this sm istg, the best one ever, they finally fuck at pt. 6
5:04 am☁️[smg] he help lulled her to sleep
just between friends🔥❤️‍🔥[smg, jyh] pure filthy smut, love all the consents
principia (pt.1)🔥☁️[jyh] prof yuyu x student y/n, got my heartbeat racing
opticks (pt.2)🔥☁️[jyh]
Teacher's Pet🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[jyh] college au, prof yuyu x student y/n, heavy angst (my heart ached sm, i legit cried), "it reopened wounds it never healed", (will reread when i feel like hurting myself again)
outlaw🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[jyh] cowboy yuyu x bartender y/n, amazing plot
cry for me🔥[jyh] pure smut, crying kink, aftercare
whichever way🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[jwy, cs] threesome, has plot, amazing chemistry, kinky
Hardcore🔥☁️💧❤️‍🔥[cjh] teacher jh x student y/n, heartbreaking frr, "you like me...but you love her-", the other women
oh shit, are we in love?🔥☁️[cjh] romcom, college au, bestie to lovers, virgin jh
Ateez Reactions: When You Use Safeword🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[ot8] tbh, idk how to desc this cuz i like seeing them immediately changed from rough & full in lust to soft & concerned
boyfriend!ateez discovering you write smut☁️[ot8] fake text, they're just so funny i giggles too much & accidently banged my head on the wall
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★¸.•☆•.¸★ SEVENTEEN ★⡀.•☆•.★
emails i can't send💧[ot13] istg its so devastatingly heartbreaking, highly rec to read during the bloody season
step by step☁️[jww] softie but they were talking bout sex tho
the wolf and the fox☁️[kmg] spy au, the tension btwn the two tho
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★¸.•☆•.¸★ P1HARMONY ★⡀.•☆•.★
cinnamon banana pancakes☁️[keeho] soft, fluffy, making breakfast
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★¸.•☆•.¸★ OTHERS ★⡀.•☆•.★
idk which category these should go, so i'll place them here:
the better man🔥☁️[san, mingyu] threesome, college au, they fight for y/n
seeing double🔥☁️❤️‍🔥[seonghwa, wonbin] college au, red flag fwb hwa, soft shy wonbin
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dividers are by @roseraris
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melodyanqel · 3 months ago
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Just Keeping Swimming | cs
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summary: a fun summer day where a father taught his daughter how to swim.
pairing: idol!husband!father!san x non-idol!wife!mother!reader
genre/tags: fluff, idol au, established relationship, married couple, cuteness, father-daughter bonding
wc: 600+ words
a/n: seriously a lot of cuteness!!
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A newly radiant sun emerges from springtime, wrapping everyone in warm and brilliant rays. It’s a hot summer day and the best thing to do is bathe in a pool to wash away the heavy heat. 
“Appa! How do you swim?!”
The sweet voice came from an adorable child in her cute Hello Kitty swimsuit with a tutu and her silky dark hair was up in a bun. She swings her legs back and forth on her parents’ bed. Her idol father, ATEEZ San, hears his little angel from the bathroom. He comes out only in his swim trunks and muscle swim t-shirt and bends down to have Sooah in his arms. She hops into her father’s embrace. “I’m not an expert but I’ll do my best to teach you,” San informed Sooah. 
She then squishes his cheeks with her tiny hands. “Appa is the best at teaching!” She tries to motivate him with so much cuteness. San smiles widely and gives her millions of kisses on her face. “You’re the best, my angel!” He couldn’t stop doting on his daughter since the day she was born. Sooah is the apple of his eye, after all. Her precious laughter rings like a beautiful melody. 
San gives her one last kiss on the cheek and pulls away to stand up and grab his phone off the bed. He texts the love of his life about heading off to the pool. You were busy at work and sad that you couldn’t have fun with your little family. But as promised, San will send you fun pictures and videos. 
Cheers, cheers
Under the hot sun right now
Go away, go away
Throw away all hesitation, throw away all hesitation
The father and daughter walked hand-in-hand to their apartment complex pool while singing "Wave." Luckily, it was just them at the pool, which was peaceful and quiet. 
“Alright, baby. Ready to go in?” San gently applied sunscreen on Sooah’s face because the love of his life would get furious if she saw her daughter red like a cherry. Sooah nods her head enthusiastically. “Yes, appa! Samchons say if they can do it, then I can too!” She mentioned her seven uncles or ATEEZ who are her best friends. 
With the earnest response, “Yes, you can! Now don’t get overly excited because it’s okay to make mistakes. Right, baby?” San reminded his angel to accept imperfections so she could learn from them. Sooah nodded, understanding her father’s statement. 
After taking some pictures to send to you and his members, San dives into the pool first. It feels rejuvenating because every day it’s been hot like fire. “Come over here. I got you, darling.” He let out his arms. Sooah strides and wraps her tiny arms around his neck. She has on a kid-size life jacket for safety. 
San swam with Sooah in his arms to the center of the pool. “I’ll be letting you go, now. Are you fine with that?” He wants to make sure Sooah is comfortable about swimming on her own. “Yes, appa!” She responded. San then carefully lets go of his child and watches her reaction. 
Sooah giggles happily. “Appa, this is fun!” She naturally moves her legs back and forth underwater. It brought a huge smile to San’s face. “You’re doing it, baby! Good job!” He cheered. “Okay, now follow my lead.” San begins to move his arms and legs slowly because he doesn’t want Sooah to get left out. She imitates her father and is swimming beside him. 
San stops to catch a breath and Sooah does the same. He brings her into his arms to shower millions of kisses once again. Sooah laughs in delight at her father’s affection. “You’re amazing, my love! Tell the samchons and mama about your new talent when we get back!” He nudges his nose against her cheek. 
More like San bragging about his beautiful angel to the world. 
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323cutie · 3 months ago
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take my soul, take my heart. | cs
pairing ୨୧ san x reader
word count ୨୧ 700
genre ୨୧ suggestive... fluff? lol is sexy a genre... is being horn knee for san a genre...
warnings ୨୧ mentions of sex, reader is implied to be a bit tipsy
author's note ୨୧ i need him and i need to do things to him and i need him to do things to me (blind is my most listened to ateez song)
18+ mdni!
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It’s a vibrant night.
The middle of summer is unforgiving, but still kind with the way she gives you warm, comfortable nights. Crickets sing outside in time with the music in the bar, a chorus of youth and heat, a dance of love and excitement. Your eyes glow under the low lights, fitting in perfectly with the weightlessness of your limbs, the bass thrumming in your bones.
You don’t know how long the band has been on stage, but you know the singer has been looking at you their whole set.
He’s pretty. Warm and languid when he looks at you, passion lacing the edges of his voice when he sings. Your friends’ chatter slowly fades away, caught up in the sweetness of your drink and the kind, smouldering eyes of the stranger on stage.
He finds you soon after – at least, you think; he slides into the space beside you at the bar, eager but poised. You turn your full attention to him and he smiles, pretty dimples taking shape. He fits in so easy, warm and humid and bright. “Can I buy you another?” He asks, pointing to your empty glass.
You shake your head, do nothing to hide your gaze as you take him in. “Think I’m done for the night,” you answer. “Will you tell me your name?”
He grins, leans forward until he’s closer to you. One of his arms rests across the back of your chair, and you can’t help the fire that spreads through you when you catch the faint smell of his cologne, woody and floral and masculine. Once he seems to decide he’s close enough to you, his voice is a gentle baritone as he says, “San.”
It’s just his name, but you feel it wash over you like a wave. San’s eyes hold a question that you answer with your own name, and your voice seems to have the same effect on him – somehow, under the constant chatter of the full bar and the familiar beat of a song you’ve never heard, it feels like you’re in your own world with him. Barely touching, a whisper away, surrounded by midsummer heat.
“Do you dance?” He asks. 
You don’t even have to think about your answer. “With you, I do,” you respond. San grins, pretty dimples and all, then holds his hand out to you.
The dance floor is alive, and you and San find a spot in the middle of it all. You don’t usually dance, but you don’t usually get approached by people like San, either – but your footsteps match with his easily. You feel warm, burning, letting him pull you to his chest, then letting you go in a spin full of colors and laughter. The songs blur together until they slow enough for you to gather San in your arms, guiding his hands to your waist.
“Your voice is beautiful,” you tell him. There’s more, but you think he knows. His skin is golden and you want to see it under the moonlight, against your hands, pressed into your sheets. 
San laughs, and you think his ears are pink. “Yeah?” He asks, and you know it’s rhetorical, but you nod along anyways. “I’ll sing for you all night, then, hm?”
You preen, take half a step closer to him like the heat doesn’t matter. San lets you, pulls you to him, breathes you in. You wonder how he’ll sing for you – later, outside, walking you home, sweet like honey? Pressed against your front door, wound up and free, melodies bouncing off the walls of your hallway? Or maybe into your pillows, lyrics breathed into your skin, sucked into bruises on your thighs? 
It won’t take long, you think. The stars glimmer in his eyes but their focus switches to your lips, your neck. You feel like you’re standing outside midday, overwhelmed with something white hot. San’s fingers twitch at your waist like they’re aching and you want nothing more than to ease the pain.
You exhale, push closer, chest to chest. San sighs when your fingers play with the delicate chain around his neck.
“You’ll walk me home?” You ask, though you already know the answer. 
“Of course,” San says, eyes bright. He’s already inching towards the exit, and you follow. “I’ll take you anywhere, honey, just tell me where to go.”
Your heartbeat pounds in your ears as you lead him out of the bar, into the hazy street, fingers intertwined like fate. He sings for you here, true to his word, and his voice meshes beautifully with the fire in your heart and the desire both of you share.
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imnameimswrld · 7 months ago
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ⵌ ׄ ۪ 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒 𝐆𝐔𝐘 ⁰⁰ ׄ ⑅ CS ‌˖ ֺ ᰮ
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—  DESCRIPTION   ੭ in which, choi san goes from "that one shirtless guy" at coachella to a father of a whole ass formula 1 fandom.
—  PAIRING   ੭ haas!driver x choi san.
—  FILE   ੭ social media au.
—  WARNINGS   ੭ language.
—  SERIES   ੭ "WAIT...THEY MAKE SENSE !?" .
❪ main masterlist | kpop masterlist | f1 masterlist ❫
━━━━━━━━━━❪ 🖤 ❫━━━━━━━━━━
ynusername added to their story ! • 1hr
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seen by landonorris, lewishamilton, and 2 223 233 others
landonorris replied to your story !
not u going to THE festival without ME.
and here I thought, we were friends.
mf, I TOLD YOU I WAS GOING.
you just don't utilize those two things on either side of your head.
dumbass.
😧😔, I see.
ynusername
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liked by charles_leclerc, sabrinacarpenter, and 2 424 243 others
ynusername what a weekend omfg, THANK YOU COACHELLA !!
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user1 now wait just one damned minute...ain't that seonghwa and san in slide 7 ???
↳ user2 ayo since when does mother hang with ATEEZ ?? SPILL THE TEA MOTHER.
user3 yn's a atiny AND a fearnot !? my worlds are colliding holy shit.
user4 WHO IS THAT MAN MOTHER
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ateez_official_ added to their story ! • 1hr
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seen by ynusername, howtodraw.cs, and 1 232 333 others
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MY VV GIRL 🏎❤
sooo
when were u gonna tell me we broke up ?
MOUNTAIN CAT ⛰🐈‍⬛
i almost fucking stormed into that office and put my manager in a chokehold
if hwa hyung hadn't stopped me, I'd be sending this from a jail cell.
I will fix this, yn
MY VV GIRL 🏎❤
hey, honey, it's okay
don't do something that'll get you into trouble please.
MOUNTAIN CAT ⛰🐈‍⬛
no baby, it's not okay, and I'm going to make this right.
I'm not going to let the company flat out lie and let people think you're free and for the taking.
MY VV GIRL 🏎❤
possessive, are we ?
MOUNTAIN CAT ⛰🐈‍⬛
you know damn well I am.
MY VV GIRL 🏎❤
and I love it 😍😍
MOUNTAIN CAT ⛰ 🐈‍⬛
I gotta go baby, my flight is leaving
I love you ! ❤
MY VV GIRL 🏎 ❤
love you to- wait.
what flight ?
babe ?
CHOI SAN.
WHAT FLIGHT.
ynusername
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liked by kevinmagnussen, howtodraw.cs, and 2 334 343 others
ynusername still cannot believe it... p1 in China !? FUCK YEAH BABY.
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haasf1team L/N 🔛🔝
kevinmagnussen very well deserved yn, congrats ! 👏
↳ ynusername thank u sm kmag 🥺
user1 just to be clear...WE ALL FUCKING SAW SAN IN THE HAAS PADDOCK RIGHT !?
↳ user2 girl, the camera literally panned in on him and the screen said "San Choi, K-POP Idol & PARTNER OF L/N" 😃😃
↳ user3 so clearly san did NOT approve of the statement kq put out lol
user4 YNSAN IS MF REAL BITCHES 🤩🤩
user5 the proud smile san had on his face as he looked up at her on the podium, I AM CRYING MYSELF TO SLEEP TONIGHT.
user6 he really went from "that one shirtless guy" to father.
ynusername
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liked by lewishamilton, zhouguanyu24, and 2 434 990 others
ynusername some down time in seoul is where it's at
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user1 they fr said "fuck you kq" and as they should.
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writingmochi · 1 year ago
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cast: ateez & txt & enhypen ✗ reader
synopsis: a collection of ateez, txt, and enhypen works based on author's favorite radiohead songs
genre: variative for each member
based on: music radiohead's discography from albums “the bends”, "ok computer", "kid a", "amnesiac", "in rainbows", and "ok computer oknotok 1997 2017" (1995-2017)
status: subterranean homesick alien out now!
message from the moon: do remember that this is fiction and all the actions the idols do in these works do not reflect what they are in the real world. this is a non-priority anthology so all stories are standalone, won't have any schedule for deadlines, and will be written on my availability! also, note that the infos written below aren't the final one so i can add/subtract anything such as each of the synopsis which will have its final form when the certain fic is released
taglist? right here
listen to all 20 tracks!
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you're turning into something you are not
cast: frat bro!sunghoon ✗ sorority girl!fem.reader
genre: romantic comedy, greek life au, college au, angst, mature content (smut)
inspired by: literature the prince and the pauper (1881)
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it wears me out
cast: san ✗ fem.reader
genre: adventure, sci-fi, romance, dystopian, angst
inspired by: movie wall-e (2008)
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you do it to yourself
cast: wooyoung ✗ fem.reader
genre: modern dystopia, thriller, tragedy
inspired by: tv show black mirror (2011-present)
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this, this is our new song
cast: idol!hongjoong ✗ indie musician!fem.reader
genre: drama, coming of age, musicians au
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i am back to save the universe
cast: jungwon ✗ fem.reader
genre: superhero fiction, adolescence, science fiction, angst
inspired by: comic cloak and dagger
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ambition makes you look pretty ugly
cast: hueningkai ✗ reader
genre: content not available, set in the terra incognita universe
inspired by: error 401
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they'd think that i'd finally lost it completely
cast: alt kid!soobin ✗ fashion student/designer!fem.reader
synopsis: after soobin's encounter with a person from his original timeline, he experiences doubts if he can settle in this new timeline or not. his alienation and existentialism take a spin in a new world he has to figure out himself, or if he could be courageous enough to ask you to guide him down back to the surface
genre: coming of age, slice of life, romance, drama, friends with benefits au, college/university au, angst, fluff, mature content (drug consumption and explicit smut), set in the time wave universe
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this is what you'll get when you mess with us
cast: jay ✗ fem.reader
genre: drama, crime, romance, thriller, angst, mature content (smut)
inspired by: bonnie and clyde but with a dynamic of succession's tom wambsgans and siobhan roy
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you know we're friends 'til we die
cast: seonghwa ✗ fem.reader
genre: content not available, set in the terra incognita universe
inspired by: error 404
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we are standing on the edge
cast: detective!jongho ✗ detective!fem.reader
genre: crime, mystery, psychological thriller, noir
inspired by: movie se7en (1995)
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the worms will come for you, big boots
cast: spy!yeonjun ✗ investigative journalist!fem.reader
genre: action, adventure, drama, agent au, angst
inspired by: movies from the 007 series: the spy who loved me (1977) and tomorrow never dies (1997)
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i'm not here, this isn't happening
cast: singer-songwriter!taehyun ✗ up-and-coming actress!fem.reader
genre: drama, childhood friends au, fame au, angst, mature content (suicidal thoughts, manipulation, exploitation), set in early 2000s
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help me get back to your arms
cast: movie character!heeseung ✗ fan!gn.reader
genre: psychological thriller, parasocial relationship, angst
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there was nothing to fear and nothing to doubt
cast: yeosang ✗ reader
genre: adventure, action, mystery
inspired by: video game silent hill 2 (2001)
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catch the mouse
cast: beomgyu ✗ fem.reader
genre: adventure, drama, thriller, road trip au, run away au, angst, mature content (smut)
inspired by: movies bones and all (2022), american honey (2016), and y tu mamá también (2001)
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one by one
cast: guitarist!mingi ✗ session musician!fem.reader
genre: rock band au, angst
inspired by: documentary meeting people is easy (1998)
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it is the 21st century
cast: niki ✗ fem.reader
genre: enemies to lovers?, high school au, angst, fluff
inspired by: folk story mulan
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because we separate like ripples on a blank shore
cast: guardian angel!sunoo ✗ human!gn.reader
genre: fantasy, angel au, angst
inspired by: the boyz's roar concept (2023)
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i don't want to be your friend, i just want to be your lover
cast: yunho ✗ reader
genre: drama, toxic relationship, friends to lovers au, angst, mature content (smut)
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the beat goes round and round
cast: jake ✗ fem.reader
genre: time-loop, science fiction, mystery, drama, fantasy, romance, gang au
inspired by: movie groundhog day (1993) meets musical west side story
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NOTABLE MENTIONS (written fics and the radiohead songs in their playlists)
let down ; exit music (for a film) - time wave
weird fishes/arpeggi - troubled pixies
all i need ; go slowly ; spectre - isobel
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© writingmochi on tumblr, 2021-2024. all rights reserved
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wooyoungisbaby · 6 months ago
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honestly idk what this is, just take it
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choism · 2 years ago
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okay but imagine coming home to sannie laying on your bed, teary eyed and drooling, playing with his hole using a big toy but he’s wearing a cock ring like a good boy :(( so his cock is all red and shiny and leaking like a broken faucet and he’s begging for his mommy bc he wants to cum but he knows he’s not allowed to do it when you’re not home so he’s just been edging himself for hours alone :((( so when he finally sees you there he gasps, pulls the toy out and spreads his fluttering hole open, asking sweetly, “will mommy make sannie cum now? pleaseee? <3”
Sub!San x Dom!Reader
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Word Count: 1.8k
Warnings: subby san, mommy kink, reader is gn as always, unprotected sex, overstimulation, lots of begging, lots and lots of cum, praise kink, oral (m receiving), use of toys, edging, bulge kink, male squirting, rimming, petnames: baby, sweetheart, sannie, good boy, baby boy, references to reader having a "cock" but that doesn't mean reader is male, just imagine them using a strap
a/n: i passed out 37 times but here's your subby san drabble you ENABLER
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When you had arrived home from a very long and grueling day at work, you weren't expecting this.
There he was, your boyfriend, sprawled on your bed with his fluttering hole on display shamelessly. His cock fully erect and leaking precum, twitching on occasion, what seemed to be a black ring wrapped around his taught balls and shaft. In his hand a large pink dildo covered in lube and slick from his hole, probably just had been used judging by how utterly stretched it looks.
San is laying on his side with one leg in the air giving you a full view of everything. His eyes are closed tight as his cock twitches aggressively, his angry red tip looking like its been abused, probably from hours of edging. He doesn't even notice you as he tries to restrain himself from coming, the cockring proving effective.
San moves the toy to re enter his gaping hole, and he let's out sighs of pleasure at the sensation of being filled. You let out a small gasp, quiet but still loud enough for San's eyes to shoot open, a couple of tears falling from the corners of his eyes clearly from the torture he has been putting himself through. A little bit of drool spills from his mouth that he doesn't even attempt to wipe away before finally speaking,
"Mommy? I've been waiting for you to come home for the past two hours..." San pouts, moving his hips downward a bit to sink further down onto the large toy, a long groan leaving his lips. "Y-you said you would be off at 4." You watch as he bottoms out, a visible bulge protruding from the bottom of his belly. He must've been prepping and edging for hours if he is able to take in the entire length of the toy.
"I'm sorry baby, I had to work over today but Mommy is here now." You walk over to the edge of the bed and San feels the mattress sink where you sit.
"I've been playing by myself since 3, to prep for you Mommy...I haven't come not even once." He mewls when you reach your hand over to cup the side of his face, pecking his lips and rubbing your thumb against his jawline, a comforting gesture.
"Aw my poor baby boy, edging yourself for 3 full hours?" San leans further into your touch and slowly removes the dildo from his hole, sighing as the tip remerges. "You must want to come so bad you poor thing. Does my Sannie want to come?"
San vigorously nods his head 'Yes', a small smile forming on his lips and his eyes lighting up. "Want M-mommy to make me come now..please. Will Mommy make Sannie come? Please...." You feel his cock twitch again forward against your side and San involuntarily bucks his hips at the stimulation, a moan escaping his lips.
"Of course baby boy, you deserve it." You vaguely gesture for him to lay on his back and take of the cockring and he does so, no questions asked. With him now lying on his back you can see the full extent of what edging has done to him.
San's face is fully flushed, his chest rising and falling and his nipples perked up, slightly glistening with what is most likely lube, and also pink from abusing them. Trailing further down his stomach is absolutely shining with a mixture of precum, spit and lube probably from jerking himself off and laying on his side.
His cock is a sight to behold, his angry red tip shiny and leaking like a faucet, his veins fully prtruding on his shaft and his balls swollen and ready to release his hot load at anytime. And his hole is so pretty, fully stretched and prepped for you to fuck, small drops of lube spilling from it and down the crack of his plump ass, fluttering in anticipation.
You sit up and quickly remove your clothes, walking back over to your bed and dragging san to the edge of the bed by his legs, earning a yelp. "Ready baby? Wanna be a good boy for Mommy?" He squeezes his eyes shut and nods,
"Yes Mommy, please."
You settle on your knees, in between San's legs. You rub circles into his thighs as you bring your tongue to his hole, licking a stripe from the rim of his hole to his perineum, sending chills throughout his body. You want to start at his hole just to edge him that tiny bit longer, wanting to see his pleasure for yourself before letting him release, but of course you wouldn't tell him that no, you don't want to ruin the fun.
You tongue his hole softly and reach a hand above to stroke his cock slowly, making sure to effectively rebuild his orgasm. With purpose, you avoid his prostate and focus on keeping him from reaching the peak where his orgasm starts, but giving him enough pleasure to build it. You stroke his shaft and roll his balls with your palm, ever slightly avoiding his sensitive head and accidentally causing him to reach his orgasm.
"Fuck mommy, please more." He whimpers, drool dripping at the edge of his mouth and down the side of his jaw, his glassy eyes nearly rolling to the back of his head and his hips bucking with every stroke, every flick of your skilled tongue. You pull away just for a second,
"It's okay Sannie, I got you. I'll give you what you want." You lift your head from his hole and replace your tongue with two of your fingers, prodding lightly at his prostate. You wrap your now swollen lips around his head, taking in half of his thick shaft and swallowing with each bob, hollowing out your cheeks and swirling your tongue around his sensitive tip. The taste of his precum and the sound of his lewd moans enough to bring your arousal up to a 10.
"Mommy, mommy!" He cries as he feels his orgasm approaching and you start to speed your movements as you feel his cock throb in your mouth. The comforting weight of his cock in your wet, hot mouth makes you moan in pleasure, sending vibrations straight up San's spine.
"Nng fuck!" San finally comes in your mouth with load whines and groans, salty tears spilling from his eyes at the release and the sheer power of it. Turns out, 3 hours of edging can make one produce a lot of cum because you feel your mouth fill with rope after rope of his hot semen, swallowing down what you can and the rest spilling from your mouth and onto his shaft and balls.
You pull away for a second to catch your breath and small squirts of cum still spill from his cock, his balls tightening with each spurt. His orgasm finally washes over but you aren't done yet.
"Sannie baby, can you take more for me? Wanna fill you up sweetheart." San nods lightly,
"Yes, wan' more ple- ase" He garbles out barely, clearly already feeling fucked stupid from that one orgasm alone.
"Mommy's gonna fuck you, okay? Wanna see my cock inside your tight hole." You take some lube and slick yourself up, lining up with his entrance. You take a hold of one of his legs and lift it above your shoulder, slightly altering the position not only to fuck him better but so he isn't stuck in the same position for so long.
You slowly enter him and feel his hole engulf you, moans spill from his mouth and garbled "Mommy s' good" and "Cock so big, so full". You rock your hips lightly and bring your hand to his cock, it already hardening again from the stimulation. You can already feel your own orgasm approaching but hold back and wait till he builds his up again, which turns out to not be so far away.
"Mommy nng, feels funny." He says, "Fuck Mommy, I think...." You feel like you know what's gonna happen so your release his leg and bring your unoccupied hand to press down onto his lower belly, heightening his pleasure. You fuck into him harder as his whimpers and moans get louder, you're almost certain the neighbors can hear.
"Mommy I think- fuck! Gonna pee Mommy, wait please." A grin plasters itself on your face and you feel your orgasm approaching closely now, just on the edge.
"What's that baby?" You chuckle darkly, now slamming your hips as they meet his round ass, loud slapping sounds resulting. "Gonna what? Gonna squirt for me? Such a good boy."
You rub the palm of your hand over his cockhead, loud screams erupting from his mouth from the overstimulation. "Mommy it feels funny. Oh god M... Mommy I'm-" He doesn't get to finish as he squirts all over your hand, on his stomach and on his own chest. A hot mixture of squirt and cum coating his already wet body and on the sheets below. You orgasm with him, grunts and moans tumble from your lips as you feel the band snap.
San can only feel what he could describe as hot white pleasure and sweet release overtake his body, a never ending stream of squirting continuing even after you pull out of him. It slows to a stop for a bit until you bring your fingers back to his hole, aggressively hitting his prostate again and coaxing yet another round of squirting from his spent cock.
He's never felt like this before but it feels so damn good. He almost doesn't want to stop when you finally pull your fingers out once his squirting ceases, but his limp body says otherwise.
"What happened..." He says tiredly, exhaustion from the edging and overstimulation spreading throughout his body.
"Baby you squirted, it was very hot."
"Mhm" is all he mumbles as he closes his eyes.
"Sannie?" You lightly shake him but sleep has already over taken him. "Wow." You tut your tongue and attempt to lift him to bring him to a bath, or at least change the sheets but it's no use. Instead you opt to use a damp towel to clean the both of you up and ask your finishing up he stirs again.
"Yn?" He says, opening his eyes slowly.
"You fell asleep for a second baby, I guess it was a lot." San responds with a groan and he pulls you down on top of him, now both of you are lying in a puddle of cum and squirt and lube. "Sannie baby, we need to finish getting cleaned up." You tell him softly and while he does groan, he sits up.
"Fine fine, but I don't think I can walk." You giggle at his response. You peck his lips,
"That's okay sweetheart you can hold onto my shoulder and we can go take a bath together." He smiles and leans in for another, deeper kiss.
"I'd like that."
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© Choism 2023. do not repost or translate.
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goldendynastys · 21 days ago
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wonderland (pt. 2) | cs
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summary: being home alone with your pets has always put you on edge, especially at night when you get extremely anxious. you thought you were over it towards the end of your parents’ vacation, but when a random stranger breaks in one night and insists on taking you with him, everything you once knew had begun to change. you knew how your story would end, you just weren’t sure if it was for the better, or the worst.
pairing: choi san x fem!reader rating/genre: 18+, MDNI | yandere, angst, fluff, eventual smut word count: 10.3k warning/tags: yandere, kidnapping, manipulation, stockholm syndrome, obsession, somewhat toxic relationship, fast burn, reader is innocent, angst, arguments between san and reader, lots of fluff, pet names, i think that is it but please let me know if i missed anything (i’m new at this), i hope you enjoy reading! <3
disclaimer: all members of Ateez are faces and name claims for this story. this is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment, or representation of real-life people. any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real life scenarios.
────────────────────── chapter two, echoes of the unknown (← previous | next →)
It had only been a week since you were taken by that thing (you hated calling San by his first name, he didn’t deserve it), and it had truly been the longest week of your life. He was constantly smothering you whenever he could, flirting and teasing you. How did he not see that this was wrong? How fucked up this situation was? It bothered you to no end, and you did everything in your power to avoid San as much as possible.
The first few days were easy; low and behold, he also had a Pitbull named Gunner and a German Shepherd named Tank, who required a good amount of attention. Thankfully, you opted to spend as much time with them as you could so San could “get a break” (when in reality, it was just so you didn’t have to spend time with him). Though San trained them in a way that would allow them to find you if you were to ever escape, they were quite sweet. Supposedly, he had rescued them from being forced into dogfighting three years ago, and they were with him ever since. You thought they deserved a better owner than him, but you were glad he didn’t treat them terribly.
The last two days, however, were the worst. San didn’t have any work obligations coming up, so he decided it would be best if the two of you spent time together. So, he nearly forced you to cuddle with him on the couch after dinner and watch television. His grip was tight, tight enough to keep you in place no matter how hard you tried to move. Though he didn’t say much, except for gently stroking your hair or kissing your forehead, it was still exhausting being in his presence. You wanted nothing more than to just punch him in the face and make a run for it.
Your plans to escape were delayed, but that was because of your revelation that you would get caught if you went too soon. Of course, it’s expected that the kidnapee wants to escape as soon as possible and they’ll take the first chance they get. If you wanted to escape successfully, you would have to wait a little longer. More than a few days, but not more than a month or two. Once you hit a month, you’d take an opportunity you were given to bolt.
For now, you waited. You waited and put up with San’s bullshit, no matter how much it made your skin crawl. Despite how evil and annoying you thought he was, he didn’t treat you terribly. He didn’t yell at you when you protested against him, he never physically hurt you, he always made sure you ate food. It was the bare fucking minimum, but it was better than being treated like actual shit. You could put up with this for a few more weeks, but that’s it.
This morning made it hard for you to stay put and do nothing. You had a dream while you slept, your first one since you got here. It was the weekend before Halloween, one of your favorite holiday’s of the year. Your family held a costume party for the Sons of Anarchy, where everyone would gather at your house and sit by the bonfire, or watch scary movies in the living room. It was just a peaceful night, sharing laughs with your family and singing old songs your parents and the older members loved. It was the first time you felt connected to the group, like you were actually one of them. 
When you first woke up, you thought you were at home. You assumed your mother would be downstairs cooking breakfast while your dad read the paper, your brother groggily walking in to pour himself a glass of orange juice. You were waiting for your dog to break into your room and cuddle with you until you decided to get up for the day. 
Your stomach dropped once you realized you weren’t at home. No, the sheets were rougher than normal, the material completely different than what you had on your bed. The sun hit your face less in this room, as compared to how hard it hit you in your’s. And as much as you loved having San’s cat, Pip, curled right next to your legs, your cat at home never slept with you, she preferred to sleep alone in her bed downstairs. All of this made you realize that you were no longer at home, and it was all just a silly little dream.
You could feel a pang of anxiety hit your chest, now wanting to stay in bed for as long as you could. You still had no idea what San was capable of, he was terrifying. He could be putting on this sweet and loving act to get you to trust him, and then bam! He would suddenly turn cold and treat you horribly. Everyday, you wondered what he was going to be like, and it was exhausting. You were growing sick and tired of being in this place, and he was making it harder for you everyday. You wanted to leave right this instant, but you knew you had to wait, and it made you angry.
Pip kept rubbing against you. It was cute at first, as all cats were, but you knew it was because she had to get out of the room, whether she was hungry or needed the bathroom. You knew opening the door would make a sound, therefore causing him to hear it and thinking you are awake, which would make him talk to you. And you were not in the mood to speak to him. You never would be, as a matter of fact. Carefully, you opened the bedroom door and helped his cat get out, quietly closing it so San wouldn’t hear you.
It didn’t take long for you to fall asleep again. Only an hour had passed, however, but you felt more awake than you did before. The house felt quieter, too. You could just sense it, there weren't a lot of sounds from downstairs and no music playing. San must’ve left for “work” or had to go out and run errands. You hoped he did, and you hoped he would be gone all day.
The cool air hit your legs as you made your way downstairs. Cold mornings were something you enjoyed, especially during the spring and summer months. It made you feel more awake, ready to take on the day. The weather seemed promising — if it stayed this way, you for sure were going to escape and find your way back home. 
There were no sounds coming from the kitchen or living room. The house felt completely empty and a sense of relief washed over you. However, it was quickly crushed when you heard music coming from one of the rooms down the long hallway. Fucking hell. San must’ve been working out and just now decided to put on some music. At least you didn’t have to deal with him first thing in the morning, you at least needed an hour before you were “ready” to speak to him.
You planned on ignoring him until you heard laughter and some grunts. He wasn’t alone. It’s not like you cared or anything, you just wanted to know who exactly was in the same space you were also in. You wanted to make sure they weren’t more insane than San was, that they wouldn’t try to hurt or murder you for simply existing. It was a reasonable explanation for why you were going to see him. Nothing more, nothing less.
Silently, you made your way to the gym, walking gently so they wouldn’t be able to hear you. Once you got closer, you placed your hands on the wall and brought your ear closer to the door. In the gym was San, as expected, but there were two men that you had never seen before. One had short brown hair and was slightly buff (he reminded you of a brown bear), while the other was slightly taller and had long, black hair (and was undeniably gorgeous; perhaps it was the way he had half of his hair tied back in a ponytail). The two of them spotted San while he lifted some heavy dumbbells. 
“So when are you getting your girl again?” San asked as he slowly lifted the weight up. “I think I’m good after this set, I’m just going to sit on the cable row machine.”
San swiftly moved from the weights to the cable row machine. As he began to pull back on it, you couldn’t help but notice the way his chest pushed out whenever he went back, and how big his muscles looked. You continued to stare at him while we worked back and forth (though you were mentally scolding yourself for looking at him that way).
The slightly buff man only shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, I wanted to get her on Saturday, but Hongjoong was pissed off about it. He says that you and I doing it back-to-back wasn’t good for business. He says that we can take time off whenever we want, so I don’t get why he’s mad at us for going at the same time. Either way, I’m getting her soon.”
The way they spoke about this entire situation made you want to vomit. How could anyone say such terrible things? “Getting his girl” as in kidnapping her and taking her away from her family? How was this normalized between this group of men? Why was this normalized? There had to be a deeper reason for this, why they all collectively acted this way. You wanted to figure out why — maybe it could help you escape and get them thrown in prison.
The taller man shrugged his shoulders. “It’s because we have a lot going on these next few weeks. Drug deals, fights, meetings — we can do whatever we want, yeah, but Hongjoong and I want everyone there to make sure everyone knows what’s going on. It’s so we can all work efficiently, and when two people are out, it can cause a small problem.”
���Fair, but man do I want to go and get my girl. She’s so beautiful, I just want to bring her home,” he explained with a dramatic sigh. “Any advice on how to get her? How long will it take for her to warm up to me?” 
San let out a laugh. “I can’t tell you that, Jongho. My girl doesn’t even like me, she’s still pissed off that I took her away. She refuses to look at me, and talks back whenever I try to have a talk with her. I’m not sure what your girl is like, but mine is kind of a brat. It’s hot, but she doesn’t go down without a fight. So I don’t know, you just have to go with the flow, I guess.”
“If she talks back, then why don’t you punish her? If you punish her, then she’ll stop fighting back and will actually listen to you,” the taller man suggested.
“No, I don’t think it’s smart. And it’s so old-fashioned, too. She’s not a dog, she can have reactions and thoughts about things. I’m not gonna punish her for that. Do I wish it was easier and that she was nicer to me? No shit. But that’s the way it is right now. When she’s fallen completely in love with me, it’ll be easier. Not sure when that’ll happen, since I think she literally wants to kill me, but it’ll happen one day. I just know it,” San explained.
“I think that day’s going to come sooner than you thought, Sannie,” the taller man interrupted with a smirk on his face, looking directly at you.
The other two turned their heads to see you standing in the hallway. A smirk rose on San’s face, while you immediately turned around and tried to sprint down the hallway. You were stopped, however, once Gunner and Tank came running towards you, happy as ever. They began to circle and sniff you as part of their morning ritual, and you weren’t able to move. Great.
You felt San’s arms wrap around your waist and turn you around. A wide smile was on his face, clearly happy to see you. “Good morning, baby. Did you sleep well?”
When he tried to give you a kiss, you immediately put your hand in front of your face near his lips. “Ew. Your breath stinks and I just threw up. It’s too early for this.”
A look of concern rose on his face, placing a gentle kiss on the palm of your hand. “Are you okay? Why didn’t you call me? Was it something you ate?”
You immediately got grossed out and wiped your hand on his black tank top, which you realized was covered in sweat from his workout. You were clearly seething, but you decided to keep your mouth shut. “I’m fine, I don’t need your help. In fact, it was actually the most peace I’ve felt since I was forced here against my will. I really wish I could have that peace all the time.”
Jongho couldn’t help but laugh at your words, the other man joining in as well. “When you said she was a brat, you weren’t kidding. You forgot to tell us she was funny, too.”
Your face scrunched up in disgust. You wanted to smack him in the head for his awful comment — everyone in the room, actually. Subconsciously, however, you noticed yourself shifting more closer to San, your hand now on his chest as you looked at the two other men. Perhaps it was because out of all of them, you knew San the best and wanted to be closest to the person most familiar to you. You still hated him, of course, you just wanted to be by him in case the other men tried to do something and you needed protection. Your hatred for Choi San would never change.
San chuckled. “She’s a comedian for sure.”
He then introduced them to you, telling them your name to be polite (even though they already knew who you were). He spoke your name again when it was your turn to meet them. “The man on your left is Jongho, and the other is Seonghwa.”
“Hi?” You introduced yourself, confused. “Not sure if I’m supposed to be happy about meeting you, given the circumstances.”
“Don’t worry, we know who you are. San over here wouldn’t shut up about you for months. We’re finally glad he got off his ass and finally made a move,” Jongho joked, making Seonghwa snicker at his comment.
You could see San’s cheeks turn pink as he said those comments, but remained collected nonetheless. “As if you weren’t all excited and annoying when you found your girl. You can’t stop talking about her! Is it wrong for me to praise and show off my girl?”
“Yes, on so many levels,” you cut in.
The men just stared at you, San rolling his eyes at your behavior. He just ignored your comment and focused on his friends. “Sorry, how else am I supposed to act when I’ve found the woman of my dreams?”
Seonghwa chuckled. “Okay, fair. I was the same when Hongjoong and I started going out. But that doesn’t mean that I wasn’t annoying.”
“It’s true. I seriously considered slapping you in the face to get you to snap out of it. And San, too,” Jongho joked. The thought brought a small smile to your face, but you kept to yourself. 
San only shrugged his shoulders and pulled you into his chest more. “Love will make you do crazy things, I guess.”
“Indeed it does,” Seonghwa agreed. “But I do think Jongho and I have to leave now. We have to shower before our meeting and errands today. You’re meeting us in, like, two hours?”
“Yeah, I just need to shower and I’ll meet up with all of you. Thanks for coming out today, bro. I appreciate it,” San answered. The way we said that and the words he chose made you cringe. Maybe it was because you hated the way  “gym bros” spoke to each other and how unintelligent they sounded. You knew it was bad to assume that all gym bros were unintelligent, but you weren’t entirely wrong. Especially with San and his friends — they certainly weren’t the kindest people and perhaps they weren’t the brightest, either.
Seonghwa nodded and turned towards you, and Jongho did the same. “Nice meeting you,” he started, saying your name at the end of his sentence. “We’ll probably cross paths multiple times in the future.”
“Thanks,” you responded curtly. You muttered I hope not very quietly so no one could hear you. 
You immediately left San’s grip once the two men left. As you started to make your way upstairs, he called out to you, concerned. “Are you alright? You just got sick, you have got to be feeling lousy. Do you want some water, some advil? I can take your temperature and see if you’re running a fever—”
“No, no that’s okay. I don’t need anything, so I’ll just . . . go back to sleep, I guess. No need to bother me, I’ll just be resting and sleeping, and I have no idea when I’ll wake up! So, yeah. Bye,” you tried to make a run for it, but stopped yourself once San began speaking again.
“You should at least eat something,” he suggested. “I heard a plain piece of toast will help, it’s supposed to be light but help you digest better. I was going to make French toast and bacon, your favorite, but I can make it for dinner or breakfast tomorrow. I’ll make you some toast now.”
Before you could protest, he made his way to the kitchen and threw a piece of bread into the toaster. Gunner and Tank had reappeared, all happy that you and San were awake. They began to smell you, and you couldn’t help but let out a small laugh as you scratched their ears. You decided to only focus on them in hopes it would make all of this go away for a little bit.
“You’re both so sweet, tough but so so sweet. You’re too adorable, I already love you,” you spoke to them sweetly.
“I’m surprised at how nice they are,” San started. You wanted to roll your eyes in a very obvious way, but you chose not to. “They were going to be trained and used in dogfighting competitions, but the owner got arrested while they were puppies. My friend was able to hook me up and I took these two home. I have not regretted it at all.”
“Well, good, because it would be really sad if you did regret it. These poor dogs don’t deserve to be with you in the first place. If you hated them, I’d take care of them myself or find them a home with someone who would actually care for them,” you scoffed. 
San nodded his head. “Good thing I care about them, then.”
You rolled your eyes this time. As if he could actually care about anything. He was a narcissistic asshole who only cared about himself, how could he care about animals? You began to wonder if there was something happening behind the scenes, if San actually treated them terribly when you weren’t around. No, they would be afraid of him if he did, and they seemed to be somewhat calm whenever he was around. Perhaps they did like him (but you hoped they would grow to like you better).
A plate being put on top of the kitchen table  snapped you out of your thoughts. It was a plain piece of toast, looking as boring as ever. San sat down with his eyes glued to you. “Eat this, it should help settle your stomach.”
“I’m all set, thank you. Wouldn’t want to get sick again, especially all over you and the kitchen. Oh wait, actually . . . maybe I will eat then,” you joked slyly, your arms now crossed over your chest.
San chuckled and shrugged his shoulders. “I wouldn’t care, Princess. Your attempts to make me angry are so cute, but they aren’t going to work. Now, please eat before your toast gets cold.”
“You sure about that? I guarantee that if I vomited on your shirt, you’d throw a hissy fit and get all mad at me,” you protested.
“I really wouldn’t. I have plenty more shirts in my closet, and I can buy more at the store. Please eat your food.” 
“Hmm, I don’t think so. You most definitely poisoned it and are either going to kill me, or make me be weirdly obsessed with you, so I’m all set—”
“I’m not going to tell you again,” San cut you off sternly, saying your name as emphasis to how serious he was. His demeanor changed — now he seemed angry, more annoyed at the way you were acting. “Eat your toast before it gets cold, now.”
As much as you wanted to fight back, you were scared. You didn’t know what San was capable of, and based on his sudden mood change, you didn’t want to risk it. So, you slowly made your way to the table and sat down in front of the toast. Reluctantly, you took a bite. It wasn’t bad, just plain toast. You took a few more bites before claiming you were full.
You pushed the plate back towards San, who was now sitting in the chair directly across from you. “That . . . wasn’t terrible. Thanks. But if I start coughing up blood or violently throwing up within the next hour, I’m killing you with my bare hands.”
San chuckled. “Thank you, baby. I’m glad you enjoyed your breakfast,” he smiled. “I’m sorry for getting angry with you. I just don’t like it when you don’t listen to me. It’s adorable and cute sometimes, but I have to remind you of who’s in charge. You must listen to me when I tell you to do something, it’ll only make this easier.”
Make this easier? Remind you of who’s in charge? Who the hell says that to someone they claim to be their romantic partner? 
The confused look you had on your face remained; you couldn’t shake it off no matter how hard you tried. You hated this, you hated being treated this way. Especially by him. You had no choice but to play along, unless you wanted to be killed, so you stayed quiet. But that didn’t mean your facial expressions couldn’t change, however, and express what you were truly thinking at that moment. At least you had that.
Shrugging your shoulders, you stood up and pushed in your chair. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever, I’ll do what you say, within reason, and you’ll stay off my case. Sounds like a deal to me,” you proposed. “And, for the record, I didn’t actually throw up.”
San furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “Then why did you say you did?”
“Because I didn’t want you to kiss me. Duh,” you answered in a matter-of-fact tone. 
You could tell San was a little irritated, but he brushed it off. He really didn’t care, he just wanted to give you affection, and it made him sad when you rejected it (from what you could tell, because he supposedly really liked you). He just shrugged his shoulders. “Alright, it’s whatever. I’m just glad you had something to eat before I head out for the day,” he said. “I’m going to take a shower now . . . wanna join me?”
You felt your eyes fall out of your head as you processed the words he just said to you. “Um, no. No, I think I’m good, actually. I’d rather be bitten by a rattlesnake than ever do that. So no, no, I’m good. Please don’t ask me that question again. Like, ever.”
“Really? It could make up for the fact you wouldn’t let me kiss you earlier. I could use your help washing my hair and rubbing my sore muscles. Plus we’d be saving water, which is always a good thing,” San tried with a giant smirk on his face. He knew this would piss you off, and he did enjoy seeing you get a little angry.
“I’m sure you can wash your hair just fine. Truly, the environment will be okay if we don't save water. There’s plenty of other people who can help with that,” you explained.
He pouted his lip slightly, clearly upset by your choice. San stood up and slowly made his way towards you, his signature smirk now back on his face. “I’m hurt, Princess. I really wanted to spend some quality, intimate time with you before I left today. I won’t be late, so maybe we can spend time together then, yeah?”
“Again, would rather be bitten by a rattlesnake. Bye now,” you shooed him off in hopes to finally end the conversation.
He only chuckled and made his way towards you. Only, instead of heading right up the stairs, he approached you. As swiftly as ever, San wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you close to his body. He placed one kiss on your cheek, and then another one on the other. He smiled at you. “For not getting my kiss earlier.”
Your face was red, and you didn’t know if it was from anger or nervousness. Either way, the only thing you wanted to do was push San off you, which you did successfully. You immediately wiped your cheeks with your hands to get his saliva off your body. “I am going to kill you, Choi San. I don’t care how long it’s going to take, but I will kill you. Mark my words!”
San couldn’t help but laugh at your words. “Whatever helps you sleep at night,” he joked, making his way up the stairs and into the bedroom.
You wanted to scream. And you almost did, except you were reminded of the two dogs and the cat that lived here and you didn’t want to scare them. Instead, you took a pillow and screamed into it. It didn’t make you feel better, but it helped relieve the tension and anger building up inside you. You groaned as you sat onto the couch. Gunner jumped up next to you and rested his head on your lap. You couldn’t help but giggle at how cute and gentle he was.
“Don’t worry, I’ll get us all out of here soon, away from that evil man,” you spoke sweetly as you rubbed his ears. You sighed as you let your thoughts wander. You weren’t really sure how you planned on escaping, but you realized that it was going to happen sooner than you thought. 
After all that happened this morning, it made you realize one thing: you needed to get out, and you would do anything to escape and get away from the devil that was Choi San.
──────────────────────
If there was one thing you loved to do in your free time, it was to snoop around the house. When you were younger, your family was secretive of all the work they did and what went on. It was in your own best interest to be kept away from it, mainly because of how dark and complicated it was. Your parents didn’t want you anywhere near that, but nonetheless, you still tried to find out as much as you could.
You’d look at their bills and other mail sent to them (which was completely boring — you didn’t understand it at all). Whenever your parents or brother would be out for a meeting or other gang-related stuff, you’d sneak into their office to see what else they were hiding. Even then, it was boring as well. Some of it was drug costs and how much profit the Sons of Anarchy were making, issues with land and other gangs coming in unprovoked. You didn’t understand it, nor did you know why they would keep all of this from you.
Nothing mysterious ever came up when you searched through the office or the mail. And, for a long time, it bothered you. In the movies, they talked about the gangs present and everything they did, the anonymous threats they’d received and what they did to stop it. The fights, the drug deals, the trades, it was all so elusive. So elusive that it kept the movie interesting. You honestly thought it was a direct reflection of real life, but perhaps it wasn’t. Or it was and you weren’t just seeing the behind the scenes. Either way, you were a bit aggravated. You honestly thought your parents and brother were much cooler than that. 
Maybe it was because you were searching for something to keep you entertained. Every day was pretty much the same: wake up, go to class, do homework, relax, sleep, and repeat. The weekends were no different, except you could actually sleep in and you didn’t have anywhere to be. You didn’t have many friends, and the ones you did have were either busy with their lives or lived far away. You couldn’t go out on your own, except with your family, but that wasn’t the kind of fun you were looking for, despite having such a blast with them. 
You figured if your parents or brother were doing anything suspicious, they’d keep it hidden. Then you’d find it on your own and begin to solve the mystery, or see if you could help. If you wanted them to actually see how great you were, why not try with something from the family business? But still, nothing. You tried all the locked cabinets and drawers in their office, but there wasn’t anything. Perhaps there was nothing to hide, and that was just how the Sons of Anarchy ran things.
The hankering for mystery hasn’t left you yet, however. Now that you were taken by San and brought to his house, you could scope around and see if you could get any answers. Why you were here, who San really was, what he was planning. Surely there had to be something hidden within the walls of his home, even if it was small. A simple piece of information could go a long way.
When he had left to meet Seonghwa and Jongho (and others who did not know of, you didn’t know how many members were in their group, and a part of you didn’t want to know), you knew you had to act fast. You didn’t hesitate to put on the clothes you wore when San first took you. Luckily, since you were smart about where you kept things, you managed to keep your phone hidden in the closet under some shoes. You charged it in increments when you were alone, just enough to ensure you could call the police. 
His office was located downstairs, in the hallway past the gym. You felt intimidated at first, mainly because you had never been in a private office like that. You didn’t know what to expect, nor did you want to mess anything up and get caught. Slowly, you entered and began to look around. It seemed plain at first, with only a desk and a few papers here and there. But the drawers had more information, from what you could see with some papers sticking out.
Immediately, you opened it and began to rummage through. Most of it was just tax documents and bills San had to pay, he probably kept it for filing purposes. The drawer on the other side had more documents, but nothing out of the ordinary. That is, until you turned around and saw the other ones.
Information about Ateez, along with San and its members, were kept here. You didn’t hesitate to open up the files; you needed all the information you could so you could put a stop to this. From what you were gathering, San kept records of who everyone was and things happening in the other gangs. It didn’t take you long to figure out that a man named Hongjoong was their leader. The way he presented himself and all the notes San kept from meetings they had made it obvious. Seonghwa was his second-in-command, practically the same position as Hongjoong, only doing more behind-the-scenes work.
The others had mundane roles. Software, finance, business deals — each person had their designated thing they were good at. San, of course, was part of the business deals group (whatever that meant). That probably involved drugs, money, or weapons, which scared you. Who knows what could happen during those interactions? 
What scared you the most, however, was the fact that there was a file with your brother’s name on it. Your chest tightened in fear as you slowly reached for it, scared of what would be inside it. An old mugshot of his was the first thing, one from a few years back. The cops had arrested him because of his involvement in a bar fight. It was quite ridiculous, in your opinion, since he left right before the fight broke out. Despite that, why would San have your brother’s mugshot? Let alone an entire file on him?
More information was in it, all about who he was and he was doing. Motorcycle registration, meetings with the Sons of Anarchy and other gangs, the mechanic shop your family owns. There were photos of him in there as well, at various public places. You were in some of them, but they weren’t too mysterious. It was just you walking out of the store with him or going to a bar with him and his girlfriend. They were from public security cameras, but even then, how did San manage to get these? Did he threaten the employees? Did someone on his team hack into the system?
While you kept thinking about that, small pieces of paper were hanging out from the files you had opened. You also noticed another one sticking out from your brother’s file. Curiously, you opened the one about your brother. On it was writing, but only a little bit. As you began to read it, you realized it wasn’t actually about him. No, it was about you.
1/21/24
I think I found her. I think I found the love of my life, and she’s absolutely perfect. She’s everything to me already. With all that’s going on with her family, I will make sure everything goes according to plan.
That was all that was written, but you were still taken aback by his words. What the fuck did he mean by that? Was it just his plan to get you, or was there something more? Why did he mention your family? Nothing major happened with the Sons of Anarchy that you knew of, so what was San implying? Did he know more than you? How was all of this possible? It made no sense, and you were starting to get more and more nervous that San had something else in store for you. You had to get out of that house and away from him.
Right before you were going to bolt for the door, your curiosity got the better of you, and you opened the other file to see what the other pieces of paper were. Rather than being paper, they were actually photographs. Your heart stopped, worried that they would be photos of you. As you inspected them, you realized they weren’t (thank God). No, they were photos of San and some other members of Ateez. Not recent photos, however, they were from a while ago.
Everyone looked so . . . different. It was from a long time ago, of course, but they looked so happy. Especially San, who did not look the way he did now. No, he was much smaller, not as buff as he was now. Despite his smaller physique, there was an extra layer of warmth within him that radiated in that specific picture. He was posing with someone you didn’t recognize, and he had this gigantic smile. Something must have happened that day, because the other person was just as happy. 
Either way, San just looked so different. He seemed less cold, less tough than he was now. You wondered what made him change — was it the work Ateez did that forced him to be a different person? Was it just because he wanted to be stronger? You hoped it was the latter, because it would be sad to see if this lifestyle made him into someone he didn’t want to be.
You could hear a vehicle being pulled into the driveway. Shit. San was back home. Shit shit shit. All of his paperwork and files were everywhere, you had no time to organize it all. At that moment, you didn’t care. You didn’t want to get killed before you made a run for it, so you had to act fast. You quickly grabbed your brother’s file and the old photo of San as you ran out of the office. You pressed your back against a wall in the kitchen, right next to the living room and hallway that led to the front door and remained still.
“Let me get this straight: we found the guy, Hongjoong and Mingi tried to get something out of him, but he escaped. Why? Those two are great at keeping people from escaping, were they ambushed?” A familiar voice asked, which you recognized to be Jongho’s. 
There was a brief second of silence before someone else spoke up, who you did not recognize. “No, the cops came around. The guy apparently is wanted for other shit he’s done, so he made a run for it before they or the cops could catch him. Fucking bastard, can’t even own up to what he did!”
“The guy’s a pussy, what can you do?” Another unfamiliar voice added with a laugh. “It won’t be hard to catch him again, right? Yunho and I were able to find out where he lives, unless he magically packed up everything and decided to leave. If not, then why don’t we pay him a visit tomorrow and tell him he needs to finish what he started?”
“Already got that covered,” San answered nonchalantly, laughing as well. The mere sound of him made you want to roll your eyes, that’s how much he irked you. “We’ll break in late at night. Get him to come out of his room and force him on his knees. Then, as he’s begging for us to spare his life and offering us money, boom. I’ll put a bullet right between his eyes. Perfect ending, if you ask me.”
And now, the mere sound of Choi San made you want to vomit and run for the hills. The way he just spoke made your blood run cold. You knew San was dangerous, but part of you believed it was your anxiety making you overthink. To hear him say those words confirming your worst fears to be true made you more anxious than ever. If he could speak so confidently about killing an innocent human, you had no idea what else he could do; to you or your family. You had to get out of there, now.
Immediately, you took as many photos as you could of the files you found. If the cops were to come back to a burned down house, you at least wanted to have photo evidence of what was found in his office. The photos wouldn’t be much, but it would be enough to question why San had those files with him and what he planned to do. 
Their conversation continued while you took photos. You abruptly stopped, however, once you heard one of the unfamiliar voices begin to talk. You had a feeling they were close by, and you were right. Standing two feet in front of you was a man, with long but short dark hair. He was about the same height as San and Jongho, maybe a little shorter. There was a certain aura to him that you couldn’t describe, almost cat-like. It was intimidating, he intimidated you. But it didn’t matter because you would never see him again after today.
A subtle smirk arose on his face once he realized who you were. “Ah, so are we finally going to properly meet the girl you brought home, Sannie? We’ve met before, but I’m not always the nicest when I’m asked to do things in the middle of the night. Disrupts my sleeping time.”
You didn’t say anything. Frozen, you slowly backed away from the man, who couldn’t help but laugh at your antics. “Wait, she’s here?” San called out, confused. He even said your name softly to show how concerned he was. His eyes nearly lit up once he saw you, but faltered once he noticed your phone and the files in your hands. He looked more concerned now. A bit upset, even. He called your name once more. “. . . What is that in your hands?”
Jongho and another member had walked into the room, confused at the silence. Once they saw what you were holding, everything made sense. “You should keep your shit locked up tight, bro,” the other member told him, patting him on the back.
But San didn’t care for his comment. No, his eyes were on you. He looked gentle, but angry. “I asked you what was in your hands. Why do you have a phone and my files?”
You were trying to find the words to fight back, but nothing came out. “You’re a monster.”
The men loudly laughed at your words. Clearly, you weren’t as scary or intimidating as you thought you were. Damnit, I wanted to sound cool, you thought to yourself.
San took a deep breath in before addressing your comment, agitated. “Baby, I’m going to need you to give me your phone and those files. Now.”
“No,” you told him sternly.
They continued to snicker, entertained by your attitude and defiance against San, who was starting to get very frustrated. His cheeks were red and he had an awful glare, almost as if he was about to explode. The fear inside you grew and you worried that he was going to hurt you — or worse, kill you. He wasn’t above murder, so why wouldn’t he hesitate to kill you if you disobeyed him? You weren’t going to let him, however. Not without a fight.
“Put her in her place, San!” One of them exclaimed as the others continued to laugh.
You sent them a glare before focusing on San’s next moves. His angered demeanor was still there and wasn’t going away anytime soon. Trying to think of your next move, you couldn’t help but glance at the backdoor. It was a sliding one, and the thought of just pulling it open and making a break for it had crossed your mind many times. You wanted to wait until the right time to escape, hence why you didn’t try it before. But now was your chance; it was risky, but you had to do it. Anything to protect yourself.
You turned to San with a look of fear and anger on your face. “You want these files? Here, take them!”
With one swift motion, you threw the files against his chest and ran right for the door. Within seconds, you were flying through the backyard into the woods with no sense of direction. Nothing else mattered, you just needed to get out. Out and away from San, his friends, his world. If you kept running, surely you’d find a road or a run-down diner that would let you use their phone.
He wasn’t far behind you, you could hear him and his friends running towards you, along with their angered grunts. Man were they fast. You rounded a corner and hit behind a small bush. It wasn’t that big, but you hoped it’d be big enough so they wouldn’t see you and would go another way. 
Their footsteps and shouts got louder. You swore you could’ve seen San with Gunner and Tank in your peripheral vision, and your heart stopped. You didn’t think about what would happen if he caught you; surely he’d be very angry, but would he be physically violent? Would he actually kill you? The man deluded himself into thinking you were soulmates, would this behavior make him see red and hurt you? You didn’t want to find out anytime soon.
Luckily, a small rock was sitting right at your feet. You threw it in the opposite direction as yourself and watched as it landed near another set of trees. All four men stopped in their tracks and tried to locate the sound. They collectively agreed to move towards it, a wave of relief washing over you. 
Their voices and steps were quieter now. Slowly, you stood up and became aware of your surroundings. It was just the woods, trees and leaves everywhere. Not a person or animal in sight, with the setting sun shining nicely on you. It was still. The tension could be cut with a knife. You weren’t sure if it was peaceful or fearsome. 
But you had no time to waste, you had to keep pushing forward. You were about to start running until your phone started to ring, and of course your ringer was on. Normally it was off, but sometimes you had it on because you liked the way it sounded when you typed. And you just so happened to have left it on and forgot to turn it off. Goddamnit.
You quickly hung up so that the sound would stop. With no hesitation, you began to run. It didn’t matter if you were going east or west or even near the end of the fucking woods: you needed to get away. Your life basically depended on it.
As you continued to run, however, you were suddenly interrupted by something getting caught on your foot. You flung forward and began to roll on the ground. Sticks and rocks hit your body and face as you rolled, your cries loud and fearful. A rock or branch of some sort must have been hidden by the leaves and made you trip. Eventually, you stopped and found yourself under the sun, your body covered in dirt and leaves. 
The sharp pain you began to feel came from your ankle, a pain you couldn’t just shake off. You groaned in disbelief and began to inspect the wound, which honestly made you more panicked. Though there was little blood, it still hurt like a motherfucker. You could barely move it without wanting to cry. If you couldn’t move it, then you couldn’t run. If you couldn’t run, San would find you sooner or later and punish you for your actions, maybe even kill you.
In the midst of your panic, you looked up to see San staring at you and holding Gunner and Tank’s leashes. He looked angry, but it was quickly gone and replaced with a smirk. He couldn’t help but laugh at how pathetic you looked, from what you gathered. “It’s all right boys, I got her!” He shouted, his smirk still plastered on his face. “Gotta say, I give you credit for making it this far. You made it longer than I thought you would, especially with all the branches. But we can’t beat them all, can we?”
“Fuck off!” You snapped as you started to push yourself away from him. You winced in pain as you did, gathering small rocks in case you needed to throw some for self defense. 
The three men began to pile in, some even laughing at your attempts to move. Your face grew hot, but you ignored them and kept going. “You aren’t going anywhere, sweetheart. It’s cute that she keeps trying. Take out your phone and get this on video so we can laugh at it later,” one of them snickered. Within seconds, you flung the rocks at all of their heads, in which they yelped in surprise. “Jesus, what the hell was that for?!” 
“Get away from me!” You shouted and scrambled to find more rocks.
As you continued, San had handed off the dogs to the man with longer hair and crouched down at your feet. He took your swollen ankle into his hand and inspected it carefully, the pressure making it feel worse. You bit your lip to make the pain more bearable, though it didn’t help much. It wouldn’t be a surprise if San decided to break it all together and leave you to die in the woods. A simple accident, he would probably call it.
“There’s nothing you can do now, just stop fighting me. You’re making a fool of yourself, Princess,” San told you sternly but collectively. His words didn’t work on you, you kept pushing back. “Now, you can either ask me politely to carry you home, or I will drag you there by your feet. It’s your choice.”
It was silent for a moment as you comprehended his words. You couldn’t help but let out a scoff, “seriously? You’re going to drag me back to your house? You wouldn’t dare.”
San paused for a moment and then shrugged his shoulders. “All right,” was all he said. He gave a nod to his friends, who started to make their way out of the forest. He didn’t hesitate to pick up both of your ankles and begin to move backwards, your back being pushed against the ground.
Once you realized he was actually going to drag you, you knew you had to stop it. You hated the way it made you feel, but you couldn’t be dragged home. “No! Wait, wait! Stop!” You cried. 
San let out an annoyed sigh and did not move any further. “Yes?” He asked with a cold stare.
“I . . . I don’t want to be dragged home. I want you to carry me,” you stuttered nervously, physically cringing at the words coming out of your mouth.
A subtle smirk rose on his face, so subtle that you could barely see it. He wasn’t satisfied with your answer, however, and wanted to hear more of what you had to say. “But why? You didn’t answer my question, you just gave me an attitude. You also didn’t say please just now, and I find that very rude.”
You bit your tongue and held back your screams. If you wanted him to comply, then you would have to be nice and polite (though you wanted to kill him). It took you a few moments before you could answer, too embarrassed at this entire situation. You let out an awkward cough. “Y-You startled me. I didn’t t-think you’d actually do it. Y-You say you care a lot about m-me, so I figured you were b-bluffing. You aren’t playing around, I k-know that now. Can you please carry me home, S-San? I’m tired and I don’t want to f-fight with you anymore. Please? I’ll behave when I get home, I p-promise.”
He seemed satisfied with your words, your face now burning a bright red color. A bigger smirk now rested on his face as he placed your feet on the ground. San put one of his arms under your knees and the other around your upper body, picking you up with ease. You immediately wrapped your arms around his neck to make yourself more comfortable, even though you didn’t want to. 
“Good girl, I knew you would listen and answer me politely,” he told you, kissing your forehead. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you behave when we get back.”
The fear in your stomach grew. You knew this fight wouldn’t be over, he had more planned for you. You were going to have to act fast when you got back, you couldn’t let him hurt or make an attempt to kill you. 
It was hard to look up when San’s friends were there. They’d make a mocking face at you and all you wanted to do was bite their heads off. So you kept your face buried in the crook of San’s neck. You could tell he was enjoying this by the way he was breathing whenever you got close to him. Only a few more minutes of this, you told yourself.
When you got back to the house, the three men piled into the living room. You and San were already making your way towards the upstairs bathroom. You didn’t want to admit it, but he was very strong. Not only could San carry you for what felt like fifteen minutes through the woods, but he could also carry you up a semi-big flight of stairs? That man had serious strength. You wondered how he was able to do it.
But you couldn’t think about that right now. No, you had to think fast. How was San going to kill you, and what could you use to defend yourself? If you knew those two things, you had a pretty good shot at getting out of this alive. Possibly getting him arrested and in jail for good.
San placed you on the counter of the bathroom, leaning over to grab something from the cabinet. He looked you right in the eyes once he found what he was looking for, angry. “What the hell were you thinking? Running away like that, disobeying me? If I tell you to do something, you do it. You don’t run away from me, you know not to try and escape. I thought I could trust you, but after that little stunt today, I’m not entirely sure.”
As he reached for the items he pulled out, you immediately grabbed the bottle of soap that sat on the counter and held it in front of you. San was taken back by this action and furrowed his eyebrows. “What the hell are you doing?”
“Look, if you’re going to kill me, you have no chance. I’ve seen enough horror movies to know how this ends and I will make sure I get out of this alive. You may think you know how to kill me, but you’re wrong.”
San looked extremely confused, with his eyebrows furrowed and a confused look on his face. “W-What? Baby, what are you talking about? Why on Earth do you think I’m going to kill you?”
“I overheard your conversation,” you confessed. “You were practically gloating about how excited you were to kill someone. You were happy at the fact that you were going to murder an innocent person for no reason. Between that and the files you had on the Sons of Anarchy and my brother, it all added up in my head. You were going to eventually kill me and my brother. I had to make a run for it before you tried anything. I wanted to find a police station and get you arrested. I have photos of everything on my phone, that’s why I didn’t give it up.”
He paused for a moment, trying to process your words. San ran his hands through his hair and sighed. He seemed very confused and startled at your words. When he looked up at you, there was a sense of hurt and sadness mixed within his face. “It all makes sense now,” he whispered. “Princess, you need to know that I would never hurt you. What I was talking about with the guys has nothing to do with you or your brother. Did you… did you actually think I was going to kill you?”
“Well, yeah. You kidnapped me in the middle of the night and are forcing me to be your weird little girlfriend slash housewife. I don’t know you or what you’re capable of,” you answered truthfully.
San sighed again, this time more upset than before. You could tell that this hurt him, the entire situation. It was a little weird, since this entire thing was his fault, but San was insane. The man deluded himself into thinking you and him belonged together; he probably deluded himself into thinking that he messed up and the only way you’d forgive him was if he apologized. 
He finally collected himself and shook his head. “I knew you weren’t trying to run away from me. You were just scared, you wouldn’t have done that if I didn’t say those things,” he started. San reached for what you now realized was rubbing alcohol. “This might sting a little, but I got you. I won’t let anything bad happen.”
You grimaced in pain as he poured the alcohol onto your swollen ankle. Once he cleaned up the blood, he carefully wrapped your ankle in a bandage to ensure it would heal properly. It hurt like hell, but this would blow over in a few days. You’ve seen your dad and the other members of Sons of Anarchy deal with much worse, this was nothing. “There you go. You can’t do much, but I’ll be here to help. Let's get you to bed, yeah?”
He didn’t wait for your answer. Rather, he picked you up off the counter and carried you to the bedroom, whispering sweet nothings in your ear. He sat you down on the bed and gathered extra pillows so you could elevate your foot. San pulled out a pair of shorts and a t-shirt for you to change into. He tried to help you do so by grabbing the ends of your shirt, but you immediately stopped him. “No, no. I can do this myself, please. I don’t want you to see my body, I’m not ready for that. Nor will I ever be,” you told him softly.
He took a step back and nodded his head. “All right, but you need to keep your foot elevated so it’ll heal better,” he reminded you. “We aren’t going to have dinner tonight, I’ll bring some snacks for us once I tell the guys to go home. Go get some rest, you’ve had a long day and you’re really tired. I’ll be up in a few minutes so we can eat and go right to bed. That sound good?”
“Uh, yeah, sure. But uh, take your time when saying goodnight. You know, there’s absolutely no rush. Really, I’ll probably be asleep and won’t be able to talk to you. Kinda a win for me, if you think about it,” you reassured him.
A small laugh left San’s body as he leaned over to place a kiss on your forehead. He placed his hand against your cheek, looking at you with adoration while he rubbed his thumb against it. “There she is, I missed her today. Oh, and I’m going to need you to give me your phone now. I saw you move it to your front pocket when we got into the bathroom.”
You gave him a sad look, almost as if you were about to cry (you weren’t, you just didn’t want to give him your phone). “But I have cute pictures of myself on there! How else am I supposed to get those back?”
San only laughed but didn’t say anything. You dramatically sighed and hesitantly handed the phone to him. “Thank you. I plan on getting you a new one, so you can take plenty of pretty pictures for me,” he reassured you. “Go to sleep, Princess. You need it after the stressful day you had.”
And within seconds, he was gone. You rolled your eyes and groaned into the pillow. You were so close. You could have gotten away if you didn’t trip over that stupid branch. You were aggravated, to say the least. 
But your suspicions of San were correct. You knew there was something off about him, you just couldn’t figure out what. Now you know that he enjoyed murdering people and has probably killed people in the past. That idea sent shivers down your spine, the fact that you were sleeping next to a killer every night. You had no idea why San would willingly do such a thing, to take life away from an innocent person. You knew Ateez were terrible people who did terrible things, but you didn’t realize this was the extent of how evil they were. 
The note you had found in San’s office was unsettling, too. What did he mean by everything goes according to plan? Was he talking about how he was going to kidnap you and take you from your family? Or was there something else he had in mind? He said he wasn't going to kill you, but could you really trust him? The possibilities were endless, but you knew something was wrong. And you weren't sure if you wanted to find out.
You could hear San saying goodbye to his friends, which meant that he would be coming to bed soon. With a sigh, you quickly stripped out of your clothes and changed into his, even though you’d much rather be wearing something else. His clothes were comfortable, but they were his clothes and you wanted nothing to do with him. 
You began to think about how you were going to get out of this. You weren’t going to give up, that was for sure, but you really needed to think about what you were going to do to escape. Today was unplanned, impulsive. It was unexpected, too, but now you know that you need to be strategic. You knew you could do it, it would just take more time and effort to do so.
Today taught you many things. One, start snooping immediately after San leaves. Two, do what San says within reason, even if you don’t want to. It’ll save you time and embarrassment; the more compliant you are, the sooner he’ll leave you alone. If you could do those things, you’d be safe from harm. You hoped, at least. 
You didn’t know what Choi San or his friends were capable of. If you could keep your guard up, you’d make it through just fine (hopefully).
110 notes · View notes
horanghaejamjam · 1 year ago
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Jigsaw - {CS}
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↪   Summary: You are the lead detective in an investigation surrounding one of the most infamous killers the city has ever seen. Unfortunately for you, Jigsaw knows you're onto him and has played you like a game at every turn, threatening the case and your status. Your determination to catch him finally gets you a lead, only for you to find yourself tangled in a special trap that he designed just for you. Let the game begin.
↪ Pairings: Jigsaw Killer Choi San x Female Detective Reader
↪   Rating: M 18+
↪   Genre: Non-idol/Slasher/Horror movie au/ Suggestive / Fluff/Friends to enemies to lovers
↪   Word Count: 5.7k
↪ Warnings/Contents: References to classic horror movies, mainly Saw, Silence of the Lambs, and Scream. Mentions of death/murder/being shot (not detailed). Seonghwa and Mingi both make cameos in this story with a few other members being mentioned. Swearing and implied smut (MDNI). San being a teasing little shit, makeout sessions, fondling over clothes.
↪ Side Notes: To the wonderful @pinkywritings hi darling I was your assigned Ghost Writer for the @atinyhalloweenproject. This is my first time writing for San and I had a lot of fun with it so I hope you enjoy it! Sorry it is so late I wanted to have it out by Halloween but due to the sudden weather change we haven't had power. I tried to make it longer to make up for that so hopefully it doesn't feel rushed and was worth the wait!
I honestly may do a part two to this or an expansion later on because I love the idea of Jigsaw San but we'll see.
↪ Click here to see my other Ateez stories
↪ Click here for other kpop masterlists
↪ Click here to join my fic taglist
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“Police officials are seeking any leads in identifying the man known only to the public as the Jigsaw killer. He is believed to be linked in multiple disappearances and murders that have taken place around Seoul for the past three months. The victims were all found in various handmade traps and had a puzzle piece drawn somewhere visible on their body. At this time investigators have no leads and are asking the public for any knowledge they may have on this public threat.” 
The reporter's voice faded to nothing as the volume on the TV was lowered to zero. You groaned softly to yourself as you tossed the remote to the side, running your hands through your hair as you sat forward on your couch. It had been just over a month since you were assigned the Jigsaw murder case, the last detective backing out after the man in question threatened to target his family. The case was quickly transferred over to you, one of the best detectives in your field, but it was very quickly starting to test your patience. 
Whoever this Jigsaw was, he was a clever man. He left no trace, no evidence, nothing that would allow you to track him down. You went through surveillance, interviewed the family and friends of the victims, tried breaking down his traps for any clues, but any lead always led you right back to square one. You had tried to be patient, hoping that eventually he would slip up and give you something, but it was starting to sound like wishful thinking. Even worse, he knew who you were and started calling you out directly. You would find notes addressed to you, pictures, voice messages, all calling you out and taunting you. It was like he was playing some cruel game with you and you had no choice but to play along or risk losing everything. You couldn’t even walk to work anymore without some reporter chasing you down demanding an explanation or any evidence you had in the case. It came to a point where you only went to the office when called, and the rest of your work you did from home. 
Various evidence pictures and case files were thrown across your coffee table, a few rough notes scribbled in between. You had been looking at the same files for the past couple of hours, dissecting every last word to see if you had missed any connections. Your last victim had been found 72 hours ago, and you knew you only had a day at most before the next one. There were a few things you had discovered about Jigsaw, and the main one was that he worked on a schedule. Once someone was reported missing, it would be three days before their body turned up and the cycle would start again. Whoever this man was, he clearly enjoyed his patterns, and that is what you found yourself looking for, any pattern you may have missed. 
“Working from home again I see?” you practically jumped out of your skin as you heard the deep voice of your roommate behind you, turning around to see his tall frame leaning over the couch. 
“For Fucks sake Mingi you almost gave me a heart attack!” you whined, reaching up to lightly smack at him, “what are you doing here anyways I thought you weren’t coming home tonight.” You and Mingi had been friends for as long as you could remember, having met back in high school and staying together through college and your time at the police academy. He was like a brother to you at this point and you trusted him so you didn’t mind if he saw your work, even if he technically wasn’t supposed to. Mingi always found your work to be fascinating and would bug you randomly about cases, which only grew more when you started investigating Jigsaw, though you assumed it was just because you got to bring your work home now. Just as you predicted, he made his way to the other side of the couch and took a seat next to you, picking up one of the crime scene photos to get a better look. 
“I was going to stay at Yunhos tonight but something came up and he had to cancel,” Mingi explained, running his thumb over the picture he was holding, “ouch this looks like it would have been painful, what is it?”
“That’s one of Jigsaw's latest traps,” you answered, snatching the photo away from him, “I’m looking through it to see if I can find any missing clues.” 
“Have you found anything?”
“Sadly no, he’s very good at covering his tracks. It’s been a month and we still don’t have any leads on this guy, it’s like he’s a ghost or something.” Mingi hummed softly as he continued to look through all the pictures, careful not to mess them up knowing you would yell at him if he did. 
“Now I’m no expert but, are you sure you’re only looking for one person?” he asked, catching you off guard. 
“What do you mean?”
“I mean all these crime scenes you’ve shown me have been pretty big and this says it only took three days, seems like a lot of work for one person if you ask me.” Mingi explained, “and that’s why your patterns wouldn’t line up like you want them to.” You blinked up at him dumbly for a moment as you processed his words, looking back down at the file you had basically memorized by this point. You didn’t want to admit it, but Mingi had a point. 
“You know that’s actually not a bad idea,” you muttered. 
“I can be helpful sometimes you know,” he bragged with a laugh, earning himself a punch to the shoulder. He didn’t have time to retaliate though as you were packing up all of your things and rushing towards the door, “Wait where are you going?”
“I need to check on something, don’t wait up for me!” you called back, pulling on your coat and running out the door as he called after you. In your rush you hadn’t realized that you dropped part of your case file on your way out, nor did you notice Mingi pulling out his phone to call someone as he closed the door to your apartment.
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You made it to the crime scene in no time, an abandoned warehouse located just on the edge of the city. You parked your car a bit away and pulled out a flashlight as you made your way inside, ducking under the caution tape and pulling your jacket closer to yourself as you looked around. The clean up crew had gotten most of the scene cleaned by now, but the trap itself was still there. A weirdly broken mess of chains and blades that you wouldn’t have been able to put back together if you wanted to, making you wonder how Jigsaw even came up with the idea in the first place. You shook the thought out of your head and made your way to one of the blades, leaning down to inspect it carefully. It was sharp with a curve to it, but almost messy in design as if it was handmade. To test that theory you took a look at another one and noticed the same thing except this one was thicker and less curved despite being set up the same way. The chains themselves were also a bit sloppy when you looked at them closely, almost as if they had been done in a rush. It wasn’t as clean as Jigsaw's normal work, and now Mingis suggestion that you were dealing with more than one culprit seemed more plausible. 
You took your phone out to snap a picture just as the door to the warehouse opened, a new light pouring in and a familiar voice calling your name. 
“Over here!” you called back, flashing your light in his direction so he could see you. Quick footsteps made their way towards you before a familiar figure came into view. Park Seonghwa, a senior detective that had transferred over to your department a little over a year ago and assigned as your partner. You had been against the idea at first since your original partner had been killed only a few weeks prior during an investigation gone wrong. The chief had insisted it would be for the best though since you needed the help and Seonghwas cool and more collected nature would balance you out nicely which would prove to be true. Your impulsiveness had driven the older detective crazy a few times, but for the most part the two of you got along well and you could even consider him a friend. He was wearing a long black coat and matching gloves and his hair was long and falling into his face rather than slicked up like normal, probably because he had been at home resting when you called him. 
“Would you care to explain why you called me out here in the middle of the night when I haven’t heard from you in the last 48 hours?” Seonghwa questioned, unable to hide the annoyance in his tone. 
“I’ll make it up to you but I figured this couldn’t wait,” you muttered, going back to inspect the chain again, “I’m trying to prove a theory about something.” 
“That theory being?”
“What if Jigsaw isn't working alone?” you challenged, “what if it’s more than one person, that would explain why nothing lines up.” Seonghwas eyes widened a bit and you could have sworn you heard him mutter something under his breath, “what did you say?” 
“Oh nothing,” he brushed you off, “what made you so convinced of this new theory? Did you find something?” You froze for a second, not wanting to expose yourself for letting a member of the general public view the case file. 
“Just a hunch,” you lied, “but I mean look at the way this trap was built, it's messy compared to the others, almost as if it was made by someone else.”
“Or maybe Jigsaw just ran out of time and rushed on it,” he argued. 
“Can you just humor me for five seconds Seonghwa,” you groaned, “maybe I’m wrong yes but isn’t it at least worth looking into?” Seonghwa rolled his eyes but gave in, walking to the other side of the trap to get a better look. You were too distracted by your own work to pay much attention to him, meticulously looking through every detail of the trap despite not actually knowing what you were looking for. Your instinct was telling you that there was something there you were overlooking, something that was hiding in plain sight, you just had to figure out what that was. 
“Hey Y/N,” Seonghwa called out after a few minutes, “I think I found something.” Your head shot up and you quickly dusted yourself off before making your way over. Seonghwa was standing in the corner of the warehouse holding what looked to be a tape recorder. “I found it tucked away over here, may have gotten knocked around during the investigation,” he explained. 
“Does it say anything?” you asked, taking the recorder from his hands and pressing the play button. There was only static for a moment before a robotic voice spoke up, like someone was speaking through a voice changer. Despite that, you couldn’t help but feel like the voice seemed familiar to you, but it was hard to tell through the editing. 
“Hello Detective Y/L/N,” the tape addressed you, sending a chill through your body, “these past few weeks you have been running around in circles trying to discover who I am. You have been closer to the truth than you realize but you always end up blindsided by your work and, as a result, you overlook the answer that is right in front of you. I have enjoyed silently watching you up until this point but now it is getting quite boring so why don’t we make this a bit more fun? Do you like games, detective? I hope you do because I want to play a game with you. I have left a riddle for you, the answer to which will tell you all you need to know about who I am and what I do. You have 48 hours to find the riddle and tell me the answer or you will find yourself and those closest to you in a very undesirable situation. The timer starts the second this recording ends, let’s hope you are as clever as everyone says you are. Let the game begin.” 
  You felt your blood run cold as the tape came to an end, barely registering Seonghwas hand on your shoulder as you tried to process everything you just heard. Seonghwa tried talking to you but you ignored him, pushing his hand off and rushing back to your car, your partner not far behind you. 
“Where are you going? We should report this to the office first!” he called after you. 
“What good is reporting it going to do? You heard him Hwa I have 48 hours to figure out who this guy is or we’re all screwed, I can’t waste time.”
“So what you’re going to rush into something and get yourself killed?” he argued. 
“Better than doing nothing and getting everyone else killed,” you snapped back, “now if you’ll excuse me, I need to find this riddle he’s talking about.” Seonghwa called after you again but by this point you had gotten in your car and were already making your way back to your apartment. Part of you felt like going home was a bad idea, but you also couldn’t help but feel like something was pulling you to go there. The same feeling of familiarity that you got hearing the tape returned, making you feel more and more uneasy as you pulled into your apartment complex. Like you knew who Jigsaw was and yet the image of his face was blurred any time you tried to imagine him.
Mingi didn’t seem to be home when you got back, his shoes were gone and the light was off. You couldn’t focus on that though, as your attention was drawn to the stack of papers placed neatly on your coffee table. You carefully walked over and looked through the pile, recognizing pictures from all the different crime scenes you had investigated so far, each one marked with red ink. 
‘Y/N, doesn’t this random pattern seem a bit too random?’
‘This is quite close to home don’t you think?’
‘The truth has been in front of you the whole time.’
‘Why do I do what I do?’
‘Did you miss me?’
You ran your hand through your hair as you continued looking through the pictures, realizing that the riddle was basically going to send you on a scavenger hunt. It would take forever for you to go back through each crime scene and look back through everything to find out what he was talking about. Even worse, it was pretty late and you could feel exhaustion slowly taking over you, slouching over the coffee table and eventually laying against it as you fell asleep trying to decipher the riddle. 
You were jolted awake by the sound of your phone vibrating, groaning softly as you sat up and reached into your pocket for the device. You half expected it to be a call from Mingi or Seonghwa, but instead you were greeted with the same robotic voice from the night before. Only this time, you were able to hear his actual voice a bit more and it was one you swore you had heard before. 
“Good morning Sleeping Beauty, I hope my riddle didn’t keep you up all night,” the voice immediately woke you up, straightening your posture as you looked around. 
“Who is this?” you asked. 
“Aww I’m almost offended you don’t remember me, we go way back you know,” the voice responded, “I’ve missed you Y/N, and even if you don’t remember me now I know you miss me too.” You paused for a moment at his words before realizing now was not the time to worry about that. 
“Why are you doing this?” 
“That. my dear detective is for you to find out, you always did enjoy the thrill of a good challenge didn’t you? I figured you would have solved my puzzle by now but since I believe in giving people a fair chance I’ll give you another clue. One of those puzzle pieces doesn’t quite belong, once you find the answer I will be waiting for you in the place we last met, don’t keep me waiting Doll.” With that the call ended, causing you to groan in frustration and toss your phone to the side. 
“I’ve had about enough of these damn games,” you huffed, rubbing your hands over your eyes. You looked through the pictures again before one in particular caught your eye. It wasn’t one of the Jigsaw crime scenes, but instead it was a picture of an older house, one that you recognized from your last murder investigation with your old partner, San. The memories slowly came back to you and that’s when it finally clicked for you, the puzzle and the reason the voice sounded so familiar to you. That was impossible though, San was dead, you had been at the hospital with him when the doctors told you there was nothing they could do. There was no way that San was still alive, and yet you would recognize his voice anywhere. Shaking your head, you grabbed your phone and stood up, calling Seonghwa and telling him to meet you at the house in question as you left your apartment and got in your car. The whole ride there you tried ignoring the feeling of dread that came over you, hoping that your intuition was wrong. 
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Seonghwa was already at the house before you got there, leaning against the wall with a blank expression. “I take it you found the answer to your riddle?” he asked as you walked past him, leading him inside. 
“As much as I hope I am wrong I think I did,” you confessed, “and if I’m right the clue we are looking for should be here somewhere.” Seonghwa stood still in the middle of the room as you frantically looked around, digging through his pocket and following your movements with his eyes. 
“This isn’t one of the crime scenes,” he pointed out, “what exactly are we looking for?”
“Jigsaw said to find him at the place we last met and this place was the only one pictured that wasn’t one of the crime scenes,” you explained. Seonghwa hummed softly at your answer, but you ignored him as you continued looking around. 
“Why here then, what’s so special about this place?” you froze for a moment at the question, an action that didn’t go unnoticed. 
“This was the last place I investigated with my first partner,” you answered, “he was shot during the investigation and I thought he was dead but I’m starting to think I was wrong.” 
“You think it’s him,” Seonghwa stated rather than asked, to which you nodded. 
“I don’t know why he would do such a thing, but it all lines up.” Seonghwa sighed and glanced down at his watch before making his way towards you. 
“I’m surprised you know, you solved the riddle faster than we thought you would, we’re a bit ahead of schedule.” His words made your blood run cold, freezing as your head turned to look at him. 
“What did you just say?”
“I’m sorry about this Y/N,” Seonghwa apologized, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a syringe, “just know I don’t make the rules, I’m just the delivery guy.” Before you could react to his words he had grabbed you and injected you with what you assumed was some kind of anesthesia, your body going limp in his hold almost immediately and your vision going black. The last thing you remember hearing was his voice and footsteps approaching before you completely lost consciousness. 
When you returned to consciousness the first thing that you noticed was that you couldn’t move. Your arms and legs were handcuffed to a chair that also appeared to be bolted to the floor so you couldn’t tip it over. Tugging at your restraints, you glanced around to find that you were in some sort of workshop, various trap parts and gadgets tossed around multiple workbenches. At the front of the room were what appeared to be security monitors, each watching different parts of the city that you could just barely make out. 
“I have to hand it to you Y/N,” a voice said from behind you, “the last detective didn’t make it nearly as far.” The sound of footsteps echoed through the room before a figure appeared in your vision, wearing a full body red and black hood. Even though his face was covered by the hood, you could feel the presence of your former partner.
“How, I thought you were dead,” you whispered, not sure what to feel at the moment. In any other circumstance you would be over the moon to know he was alive, but how were you supposed to feel knowing he was the serial killer you had been anxiously tracking down. Shock, betrayal, anger, sadness, confusion, all of these emotions swirled through your brain like an endless whirlpool, pulling you in deeper and nearly bringing tears to your eyes. 
“Everyone did,” San replied, turning away from you to face one of his work benches, “the doctors said it was a miracle, that no one thought I would make it through the night let alone make a full recovery.” You could hear him messing with something, but couldn’t see what it was, struggling to look past his shoulder as he continued talking, “I tried to find you after you know? I thought you were the only one left that cared about me, and yet even you managed to turn your back on me.” 
“I always cared about you,” you argued, “that’s why I’m trying to understand why San, why did you do this?” It was at this point that he finally turned to face you, pulling the hood back so you could see him properly. He looked almost the same as you remembered, but there was a cold gaze in his eyes that almost made him feel like a stranger. This wasn’t the warm hearted and cheerful person you used to consider a friend, he was a killer. Despite this, however, you couldn’t help yourself from falling for his familiarity, almost as if you could convince yourself the old San was still in there, somewhere. 
“You never realize just how valuable life is until you are inches away from death,” he explained, “the adrenaline and the fight to survive, it almost feels like you are being reborn. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how corrupt the world we live in truly is, because no one really knows how to appreciate the life they are given until it is nearly taken from them. You may not understand it now but trust me my methods will help make the world a better place.”
“You’re killing people because you want them to appreciate life?” you questioned, wondering if he was actually being serious. There was no way a person's mind could be that twisted, right? 
“You think I’m a killer?” San asked, not needing a verbal response since your glare was enough confirmation, “that’s where you’re wrong you know. I have not killed anyone, all of my games are survivable as long as the player has the will to fight for it. Those who failed the games basically killed themselves.” You wanted to argue that putting people in these death traps still made him a killer but he cut you off, “Seven people have won so far, seven people who had that will to live and had the chance to be reborn. They understand what it truly means to be alive and now they help me spread my message. You may not understand me now, but I really do hope that you will be the next.” 
“So what, am I the next person that gets to be put in one of your death traps then?” you groaned, tugging at your restraints. San pouted a bit but shook his head. 
“Your game began the minute you took the case from Detective Kim,” he explained, “you and I always seemed to have an understanding so I had hoped you would pick up on my clues and join without a fight, but you were far too stubborn to listen. Eventually I had to cut my losses so I had my apprentices plant fake evidence to finally get you here, it was the only way.” Your heart dropped a bit at the word apprentices, your mind immediately going back to Seonghwa and how he was the one who brought you here. 
“So you’re telling me the whole time,” you trailed off. 
“Seonghwa was working for me, yes, Mingi as well, they both survived my games and agreed to help with the cause and when you took over my case I knew I could use them to guide you in the right direction,” San explained. He took a moment to glance at a clock on the wall before sighing and making his way over to you. San rested his hands on the arms of the chair and used them to prop himself up so he was leaning over you, “As much as I have enjoyed our little chat I’m afraid we do not have much time. I really do like you Y/N so I will give you a choice. Join me and together we can help change the world for the better.”
“And if I refuse?” you challenged. 
“Well then I guess we’ll have to play a game,” he hummed, leaning away from you, “The second I walk out of this room it will lock and a timer will start. Behind you are two doors, each with a different combination, one door will lead you to the exit, and the other will lead you to me. If you choose to leave then you will be free but you will lose your chance to catch me. If you choose to come after me, then you have a chance to learn the truth at the risk of your freedom. The combinations are hidden in this room and you will have exactly one hour to find them and leave through the door of your choosing, and trust me you don’t want to know what will happen if you run out of time.” San chuckled softly before pulling away and walking behind you, “This is your last chance to accept my offer Y/N, I would hate to lose you like this.” He waited for a moment but when you didn’t respond he sighed, “Very well, let the game begin.” You felt him place something into your hand, which you quickly realized was a key, before the door slammed shut and San was gone. 
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It didn’t take you long to unlock yourself, taking a second to rub your wrists as you stood up and made your way cautiously around the room. You did your best to stay calm and not look at the clock as you examined the doors and then looked around for the combinations, which you quickly realized were hidden on his tools. The question was, do you free yourself and turn your back on the case, or do you risk it all and try to go after San. The rational part of your brain was screaming at you to just get out of there and not look back, and yet you quickly found yourself moving on autopilot. Before you could really process what you were doing, you had entered the code for the door labeled “Truth” and ran through it, stepping into a dark hallway and letting the door lock behind you. 
You took a moment to compose yourself before heading forward, placing your hands against the walls to help feel your way through the space. All the doors were locked until you came to one at the very end that was cracked open, revealing what looked to be a makeshift office space, with nothing but a desk and filing cabinet in the room. You poked your head through first, looking around for any sign of life before slowly stepping inside and making your way to the desk, only to gasp as you felt another body pin you to it. 
“I knew you would come after me,” San whispered, spinning you around so that you were facing him. Your body was pressed between his and the desk, his arms caging you on either side as your eyes locked. 
“I can’t let you get away with this,” you argued, trying to wiggle away from him but San was stronger so he held you in place. 
“Come on Doll, you and I both know that’s not why you came after me,” he teased, “maybe it was at first but if that was the case now you would be fighting me harder.” He was right, even if he was stronger you knew you could at least hold your own enough to get him away or subdue him long enough to call for help. Yet you couldn’t bring yourself to actually fight him off, struggling against him enough to save your pride but not enough to actually push him off. “So tell me,” San continued, “why did you really come after me, was it because you were curious about my work? Or, was it because deep down you missed me?” Honestly, you weren’t even sure if you knew the answer, your body having reacted before your mind could catch up. 
“This isn’t right,” you argued, reaching your hands up to push at his shoulders. 
“And yet here we are,” he teased, backing up enough to wrap his arms around you and pull you closer to him. Your bodies pressed together and your arms instinctually made their way around his neck which made him chuckle. “I always knew you were special, you understood me in a way that no one else ever did. Stay with me, nothing will be able to come between us.” San leaned down until your lips were centimeters apart, his breath tickling your lips with every word. You tried not to give into him, knowing that this was wrong, but you also couldn’t deny the thrill that ran through you just from being near him. You had always cared for San when you two were partners, hell there was even a time where you could argue that you did have a crush on him. That was back then however, when he was the sweet and easy going detective that decorated his desk with mini plushies and would whine if you forgot to get him a pastry on your morning coffee runs. This version of San wasn’t like that, even if the allure was still there, he was cold, twisted, and a killer. 
“I can’t do this,” you argued, “you’re not the man I once cared about.” You tried to turn your head away from him, but he gripped your chin to force you to look at him. 
“Yes I am, behind all of this it is still me and I can prove that to you,” he whispered, “just let me show you.” When you shook your head again he huffed, loosening his grip for a moment before it tightened again, “Fine then, how about another game?” 
“I already won your stupid game though!” you challenged. 
“Yet you still haven’t learned,” he fought back, “the least you can do is give me a chance to convince you. If you don’t give in then I will go with you to the station and turn myself in, but if I win then you quit being a detective for good and you stay with me.” You gave him a questioning look, at this point more than positive that he had gone insane. However, if playing his dumb games meant putting an end to Jigsaw, then you were more than willing to oblige. 
“Alright fine, deal,” you reluctantly agreed. You only had a moment to register Sans smirk before he was pulling you against him again and connecting your lips. One hand stayed pressed against your back to keep you against him, while the other tangled itself in your hair, tugging slightly to get a reaction out of you. The kiss wasn’t rough or forced like you had expected, instead it was gentle and passionate, like he wanted to take his time with you. His lips were surprisingly soft against yours, and you began to slowly melt against his movements. You kissed him back and allowed him to have more control, whining softly against his lips when he tugged a bit harder at your hair. Your own hands trailed down his body, tracing his shoulders and chest for a few moments before daring to go a bit lower. San groaned as he felt you palm him over his robe, tightening his grip on your hair and deepening the kiss as his own hand reached down to grab at your thighs and your ass. 
All your resolve melted away at his touch and you found yourself giving into him completely, relishing in the way he invaded your senses. All rationality had left completely, replaced with an unusual desire as San explored your body. As desperate as he was, his touches remained soft and left you craving more whenever he pulled his hand away. San walked you back until you reached the desk, lifting you up enough to sit you on top of it and slotting himself between your thighs as he finally pulled away. You only had a second to catch your breath before you were pushed back slightly and pinned down by your hands. San hovered above you with a knowing smirk, taking a moment to enjoy your flustered expression before leaning down to whisper directly in your ear. 
“Looks like I won. Game Over!” 
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