#crylaughing

[possamble]

i am. so mean to marcille. i only write big pieces in falin POV because i am SO mean to marcille

[jametartt]

i woke up to this and i am still laughing im so sorry judie

(also, bonus)

[bastardsunlight]

//shoutout to @vehxmence for being one of the funniest motherfuckers on the planet

[karatechick1984-blog]

Frasier - Crane vs Crane "christmas squabbles"

Like, 💯🤣 - can’t breathe kind of laughing. Love it!

[pikabelle]

[beescake]

Karkat needs to looksmaxx

id write something funny here but i am physically incapable of being insincere about karkat vantas

[curioussubjects]

are y'all telling me solas not only accidentally gets trapped in his own god jail due to scaffolding bamboozling, but the people behind said bamboozling repo his fade-pocket house??

and he ends up having to help this ragtag group of people if he's to ever get out of his god jail and also stop the gods he fucked around and found out with?

the same people who are indirectly-directly working for the inquisition

the inquisition which has been chasing him for 10 years to stop him from causing an extinction event (again)

the same inquisition that's led by his ex-girlfriend?

somewhere out there lavellan is laughing her ass off reading varric's report

[because-its-eurovision]

Allas Sea Pool shenanigans subtitled

[splatoon-names]

[rubbertplant]

spocktober 30: eyebrows

his second pilot eyebrows are soooo cute. as is his whole being

[overwatch]

Straight men trying to justify why they leave Astarion at camp and never make him part of the party

[ulircursed]

dawnbreak

fumizuki (文月): the seventh month of the lunisolar calendar. literally meaning 'the month of letters/writing', it is named such for the colorful papers that people write wishes on and hang upon bamboo branches in celebration of tanabata.

To ▊▊▊▊▊▊▊▊,

The temperatures here are as cold as they have always been. Is it winter also, in your homeland? I trust that you are well, wherever you are.

I am writing to tell you that I made a friend today.

>>>

The winter chill hangs cold and heavy along the path that Andrei is traveling, now for the third time. Only once, it had been with someone else, someone he’d come to meet and know within these lands. Someone who had become special and irreplaceable in his heart.

Twice, he walks the path alone, and yet it feels the same, like a ritual, just as special and irreplaceable in his heart as she had become.

The kinshi are here early this year, or so the rumors go. It had always been deeper into winter, spring nearly peeking through the horizon, when he’d traversed the path before. If the rumors are true, it feels like a sign, perhaps, that they are here now.

>>>

I remember you telling me before, that the month of your birth falls in line with Pegasus Moon in Fódlan. I’d thought it fitting, considering your affinity with them. You taught me the name of the month, in your language.

It’s not typically meant to be the season that kinshi are here, as you might recall, but there had been mutterings among the students of a sighting, so I went to investigate.

>>>

The familiar clearing is empty when he arrives, and after a moment, Andrei accepts this with a slight shake of his head.

Not all rumors are true, it seems.

Leaning against a tree, he closes his eyes with a sigh, taking in the chill of the early morning.

It is foolish to wish for what would ever be outside his control. Better to be content with what he has, in the moment. And it isn't as though he cannot come back, when the time for the kinshi has truly come.

A shuffling nearby rouses Andrei from his thoughts, and as he opens his eyes, golden eyes and white feathers fill his vision.

>>>

It turned out the rumors were not quite true. It is not the entire flock that had come early, but a lone bird. She came closer to me than any other, over the years, despite being yet wild. She might have been curious, or perhaps merely lonely. Without fleeing, she allowed me to speak to her, even touch her.

>>>

“What are you doing here, all alone?” Andrei’s question comes out a mere breath, careful to avoid spooking the wild animal. It still rears back at the sound of his voice, a sharp noise emitting from its beak, even though it does not disappear into the sky or the farther reaches of the clearing just yet.

The archer’s gaze sweeps over the animal, and then the surrounding clearing. It does not seem injured or ill, in any way that he could tell. Neither does it bear any sign of being from the monastery’s stables, where the very few foreign steeds are kept. Did they still have kinshi there, these days? He isn’t certain.

Surely, there are others of its kind here, as early in the year as it had appeared. Or did it leave them all behind?

As curiously as its approach had been, the kinshi still does not leave. Instead, golden eyes blink down upon him, and after a moment, it takes another step closer. It exhibits none of the body language that either his steeds or the bird under his care would, were they seeking food. Instead, it almost seems...

Gently, with telegraphed movements, Andrei raises a hand, the bird's still-wary gaze following his movement until he lays it on its beak. He watches as the great bird leans into the touch, eyes finally closing, as though satisfied of something long denied it.

That is a melancholy thought. “How far did you come without anyone beside you?” he asks.

It croons at the question, the cry almost sounding mournful in Andrei’s ears. In the silence and the solitude of the clearing, Andrei thinks he can afford to be candid, for once.

“…Would you like to be my friend, then?”

>>>

I decided, in the end, to bring her to the stables. It would be far too dangerous to leave her to wander the fields by herself for the rest of the month, and I intend to bring her to see the rest of the flock, when they come. She might decide to rejoin them, as is her freedom to do so. Before that, I will do my best to care for her as you have taught me before.

It may only be for a short time, but I would like to befriend her, all the same.

>>> 

There truly are no other kinshi in the stables, once he checked. The stablehand, remembering the details of the previous steeds he had cared for, does inform Andrei that this one is female, and that if she is willing, she may stay until she either bonds with a rider or decides to leave with the rest of her flock, once they come.

She stands, shuffling her wings slightly, at the door to the stall that Andrei shows her to. Golden eyes turn inquisitively to him once more, and she takes an uncertain step forward when he motions at her.

“It is only temporary,” he reassures her, “Your flock will be here in perhaps a moon's time. I will not stop you from leaving if you wish.”

And even though the bird could not understand his words, she seems to hear the reassurance in his tone, for she steps forward, shuffling in the stall until she faces him once more. Andrei glances at the blank placard at the side of her stall.

He thinks of her, and smiles.

“Fumizuki,” he says, and the bird lowers her head as though in acknowledgement, “It is a word a very dear friend once taught me. And it is the month that we now have met.”

He thinks it appropriate. If she is willing to stay, then that is what her name would be, from now on. Andrei reaches up to stroke the feathered neck of the bird, his voice becoming quiet once more.

“We will wait, together,” he whispers, “And perhaps, in time, your important people and mine will return to us.”

Perhaps, in the meantime, they too could become important to one another.

He is no longer alone, after all.

>>>

There are more people important to me now, here in Fódlan.

There is a new professor in the Ashen my class, strong and fatherly with a guiding hand. He is far kinder and more patient with me than I could have expected, and for that I am grateful. I recall that you are close to your own father – you may see such a side to him, as well, were you two to meet.

There is a girl, brash and all but impudent with her words, but whose life and circumstances have brought her to a similar station as I. I think I understand something of her wants and motivations, and what I can do to meet them, I will.

Two mages, whom I met during a game of deception. They told me that they would not betray me, and stuck to their word. In the end, I too chose not to betray them. Does that begin to repair my past sins, I wonder? Friendships have blossomed of those brief and fraught interactions, as unlikely as I had thought at that point. They are people I wish to see happy, to not disappoint in my actions.

Then… there is someone who also considers me important. Who helped me raise a young bird from an egg. Who danced with me at the Ethereal Ball and kissed me. Who showed me not to fear making irreparable mistakes in his presence. Someone who has become, undeniably, dear to me.

And there are more. I had never expected to come to care for so many when I first arrived at Garreg Mach.

I feel, perhaps, that it would not have happened, if not for you. My first friend.

Come what may in my life, you will never cease to be important to me. I continue to wish you well, in any endeavor you may seek to pursue. And perhaps, in time, we may have the chance to see each other once more.

Your friend,

Andrei Alaric Yngvi

Andrei has mastered Kinshi Knight!

[nelithic]

　𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐥 ████ ,　𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞 　/　drabble ₊

the first time her mother received their lord father, she thought her the most inestimable creature in all gradlon.

young and eager to please, she had witnessed little more than the passing of feet wreathed in royal cloaks, knelt down and head bowed to honor his arrival and blacken not the name of her mother in disgrace. that he could be understood as ' father ' then had never once crossed her mind. her existence in his origin came detached and absolved of presumption, unmoored from connections of the body or the heart ; as it was with all her siblings, he was progenitor as a god who with a wave of one hand fashioned life and law: his blood and fangs a gift not to be squandered.

though tender of age, she understood that others across the land received similar visitation, that their proud and strong gradlon reigned and culled and cycled only as result ; but, being tender of age, still she imagined her mother somehow exceptional. them, somehow exceptional.

. . .

throughout history, magic had always run rich in the line of the fell dragons. but none so fertile as those born from their subjugated counterparts. the mage dragons of elusia had long lost their history. but among them, there were those who preferred it that way.

nel grew with no elegant, splendid horns, wreathed in rune and cloth. no tie to the fogbound fields of the snowy kingdom of man, whose blood ran similarly quicksilver with magic and ritual. her attention was directed and shaped with care to the red sun of her inheritance, gradlon's waiting throne beneath the lord-god's watchful eye, reserved only for the righteous by strength.

you are the lord sombron's child, and only partly mine. inheriting all of his greatness, and none of my wretched kind's weakness.

but she could still teach her something. brutal, punishing, exacting as could be: it was time, and it was love. the concoction of her might was in half owed to her, and this the young nel was never made to forget for each spell that wracked her limb from limb, agonized her nights on end, imprisoned her without remorse.

if you wish to be relieved from pain, or if you desire freedom, then be stronger. then you can have everything you want. i will not save you. nor will your brother.

. . .

but matricide begins the same as fratricide: a contained storm that loses control. she had been aware of her mother's growing frustration with her children's inaction for some time now, steeling herself for the reckoning that, given her temper, would inevitably come.

nil would not seek his strength in the orchestrated death of his sister, no matter how she pushed.

and nel would raise no hand against her brother in that promised defense, no matter how she warned.

where had she gone wrong as parent? after all, her daughter had everything if not for this, a simple and natural action that for incomprehensible mulishness, she would not take. a crown aligned, and a father's approving eye. what is a mother's desire if not for her young to excel: far beyond expectation, far beyond even herself, and win for that accolade, safety, success. where had she gone wrong, that the priceless fang of a precious child, pride of the brood and of her heart, should be turned upon her instead with everything she had instructed?

in that cool and unflinching rage so reminiscent of their liege lord, not bloodlust but bloodbelonging, as easy a thing as to die. in this, she witnessed sombron again—— and knew that her daughter kept the blood of kings.

. . .

centuries later, that daughter would stand upon the elusian ground and wonder at the home the mage dragons must have walked once. but perhaps that one had never walked at all. had she been born here? or had she too only ever been a product of that raging sun? to ask back then would have been out of the question.

so grasping amidst the fog, she reached out again as she had over and over since those days long flung:

what had been her mother's name? and what had she looked like? m. . . m. . .

there was no hope. after all, she had been born a fell dragon, raised a fell dragon — a birthright to kill, and a birthright to forget.

　

　 NEL has mastered dread fighter.

[lottieurl]

[sequentialprophet]

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So I’m watching all the old promos Best Friends have cut and I just love them? Absolute height of group stupidity and hype.  This entire video is unhinged in a way I love but specifically the way Trent just straight-faced says some absolute rambling bullshit and everyone just goes with it.  

“Maybe I’ll hide in a little...what is it called...toy crane machine? I’m gonna hide in one of those. I’m gonna be there for a long time and you’re just gonna think it’s normal, for weeks and months, you’re gonna think that thing is always there but guess what? I’m inside of it”

Orange absolutely breaking character laughing and Kris having to step in and shield him from the camera? Beautiful.

Chuck trying to step in when it’s clear Trent has completely lost the thread then just .... saying the same shit but with birthday cake instead of claw machine?  Exquisite. 

Also when Trent swears then is like “we can curse in this one because she did already”  😂

Full video here

[robotdragonfanatic]

Oh btw my ChaosDukemon/ChaosGallantmon died of old age but the game didn't wanna leave him with any dignity so my last image of him is this beauty: