#crying weeping i love this scene so much

[gendervapor14]

01746 birthday bash ~ day five ~ chapter 50: hopeless

content warnings: heavy angst, alcoholism word count: 577 words brief summary: my take on my favorite scene in law's backstory: rosinante breaking down in tears the night before he becomes just "cora".

happy birthday 01746. my sweet little fucked up story. i can't believe i created you. ♥

Crickets droned on. Law snored softly. Every page was a blur. The sea, the sky, it was all merging together.

Ten hospitals. Six months. All of it, equivalent to nothing.

The fire before him was crackling low, on its way to self-extinguishing. Still hot enough to render paper to ash, little orange worms of hot ember dancing along tattered edges. Lazily, his hand rustled around within the roomy pockets of his coat for any pages left behind. He hardly skimmed them before tossing them in.

“Enemy.” burned quickly. Of course the World Government tainted hospitals. I can’t believe how desperate they are.

“We needed a better plan.” was gobbled up eagerly by hungry flame. So inclined to cover up their own horrible misdeeds, they purposely miseducated trained professionals. People who are trusted with life itself.

“Marines.” fluttered into the fire.  I’ll never wear that justice coat again.

With a defeated belch, Rosinante stared at the sleeping snail planted on top of a stack of sea charts. Receiver firm in hand, anyway. “I wouldn’t pick up if I were you, either. I promised I wasn’t going to do anything stupid.” He mumbled, “Then I quit my mission for half a year. Never called, never looked for you.”

For a moment, he waited for a reply that would never come. Hung his head and let his heavy eyelids flutter shut. “I did exactly what I said I wouldn’t do anymore. I disappeared.”

The receiver hit the dirt without a sound. His hands fisted around the book of sea charts in his lap. His brother’s beloved sea charts. The solution, he thought, the diamond in the rough. He tore out a handful of pages and whipped them over the cliff’s edge, towards the sea. Ancient maps tore and fluttered in the wind until they clung to the surface of the water. Slowly breaking down, deteriorating.

And then, he downed the rest of that sweet bottle of white wine. The bottle he saved for months now, the cure bottle. The celebration bottle. Tasted bitter as hell.

What the hell am I doing…? I’m completely isolated now, forcing this poor kid to relive his horrible childhood, over and over again. I might as well have crucified him outside a church and lit a match. He stared at the blurring waves, legs folded up, moonlight turning dark feathers a glistening violet. His sickness is only getting worse. It’s not even the will of D driving me anymore. I don’t care about that anymore. I’m not sure I ever did.

When he dies, then what, Rosinante? What purpose do you have? You’ve turned your back on your family, blood and otherwise. There’s nothing left.

An aftershock of rage coursed through him. He swayed up to his feet, shoulders trembling. Threw the empty bottle against the rocky surface, hard, internally delighted with the sprinkle of glass, the shattering echo. The heat prickled then, sparked up from his sternum, clogged his throat, his nose. His eyes. I just…I feel so sorry for this damn kid. He’s got Flevance under his skin, his family’s death in his eyes, and my brother’s wretched strings tangled around every limb. He needs help, but it just seems so impossible…and if I give up…if I do nothing…he’s going to become just as miserably dangerous as Doflamingo. But what am I supposed to do? Love didn’t save Sengoku, Tsuru, or Sora from my stupidity. Love won't save Law from White Lead Disease.

read the full story here ♥

previous entry here!

[skullsandcorals]

How I've Been Feeling About Aryan's Grover:

[shield-and-saber]

yeah, so i just finished cataclysm

[murdermeadow]

THE WAY TAION ACTS DURING THE PRISON SCENE MAKES ME SO SO SAD IT'S UNBELIEVABLE

CUZ LIKE

MY POOR BOY !!!!! he gets so so SO frustrated and upset and snarky because he is very rapidly losing hope and the whole ordeal is INCREDIBLY stressful for him because it directly ties into everything he fears !!!!!! he's so scared of the people he loves DYING and having NO CONTROL OVER IT so this entire period of time is PURE PSYCHOLOGICAL TORTURE as he watches his friends weep and suffer and he can't do shit about it !!!! jackshit !!!!! his mondo are disabled, his communication is null, all while the person he's been trying to protect and keep happy the most is stuck AWAY FROM HIM. and he can't! do! anything! so he sits there rotting!!!! rotting and decaying and crying and weeping and slamming his fists against the wall because HE CAN'T TAKE IT !!!!!! THIS IS HIS WORST NIGHTMARE MADE REAL !!!!! so it makes complete sense as to why he's so agitated and sarcastic !!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[tvrningout-a]

CHAPTER SELECT       ➤ ???       ➤ ???       ➤ is it not enough i'm happy? 

i made the team! i get to play! i get to be their setter!

     how brightly she shined as she told her parents of her success, of how she worked hard for months to obtain that starting position, of the excitement she finally felt again. they were happy -- why wouldn’t they be? for years, makiko hadn’t touched an extracurricular, nor had she dedicated herself to anything worthwhile. they were relieved to see her smile, to hear her talk so animatedly about something.

     but makiko had been naïve. they always want more from her. 

     oh, won’t it be nice if you’re captain next year? her mother mentions it more than once, likes to talk about how yuuta was the basketball captain his senior year, and makiko tries to smile and move on. she doesn’t care if she becomes captain or not, doesn’t believe it’s something to entertain when she’s still building trust with her new teammates. she just wants her team to do well, to enjoy themselves and feel good about what they’re doing. what does it matter if she’s the one leading in the end?

     her father thinks her coach is too easy on her and her teammates, mistakes allowing the girls’ room to learn and trust each other as a lack of initiative. never mind they’ve won every game up until now -- that coach rubs him the wrong way, and maybe he’ll have a talk with her. makiko knows this comes from a place of love, that he only wants the best for her, but she can’t help the scowl and harsh protest that leaves her mouth. he scolds her for talking to him that way and tells her she won’t succeed if she doesn’t have someone to push her.

     makiko shuts up, apologizes, and clenches her fists so tightly that her palms sting. 

they push their own sense of ambition onto her, yet they don’t believe she can do this on her own? that she can’t be like her siblings like they’ve always wanted her to be unless someone holds her hand? what a fucking joke.

     her mother brings up becoming captain again one night, and makiko just cannot take it anymore.

     “ is it not enough i’m having fun? ”

     quiet but sharp, makiko’s words halt the conversation at the dinner table. she feels yuki’s stunned gaze, but she doesn’t look away from her plate. mrs. furukawa asks, “ what? ”

     " is it not enough i’m having fun? is it not enough i’m happy? ”

     “ makiko--- ” 

     “ no, tell me! is it more important that i’m successful, or more important that i’m happy? ”

     it comes pouring out, every ounce of resentment makiko has ever felt for being compared to her siblings, for being taught that unless she was the best, she wasn’t good enough. it’s reflected in her eyes as she glowers at her mother, shoulders tense and one hand clutching her chopsticks with a death grip.

     “ where is this coming from? ” her father has the nerve to look confused, and makiko scoffs.

     “ how many times have you compared me to yuki and yuuta now? a hundred times, a thousand? it isn’t a crime to lack ambition, dad! ”

     " we just want you to be successful, makiko, ” her mother interjects, sounding stern despite her glassy eyes. “ your siblings never needed us to push them much, but you... ”

     “ i don’t need you to push me. you pushing me has only ever made me feel inadequate, you know that? you put my siblings on this pedestal and expected me to match that -- of course i stopped trying! ”

     chest heaving, heart racing, head spinning --- when did she stand? she’s trembling, she realizes, and she can’t seem to get her breathing under control. yuki reaches out to her, but makiko recoils ( don’t touch me or i’ll break ) . it seems her parents are stunned into silence, though makiko doesn’t take the time to look at them. she doesn’t see the guilt as it sinks in what they’ve done to her. no, she has an overwhelming need to get away, far away, and rushes from the dining room and out the front door. she can’t be sure who it is screaming after her. her mind can’t focus on anything else but being anywhere but here.

     she’s done. this is the last time she runs away from a problem. in a few hours, makiko will come home, sit down, and talk to her parents. but she needs this right now, a small reprieve after finally finding her voice and exhausting it.

     as makiko collapses against a tree ( of course she finds herself at the community center, where it all began ) , she makes herself a promise: she won’t ever be that timid, shell of a girl again.

[llycaons]

can someone help me. what is this thing. why was lestat making finger movements on a piece of old wood. I can't believe he was actually practicing. he'd need an actual piano to do that. do we know what was happening here

[grimesthinker]

Stepdad!rick having a bunch of friends over for a poker night or something and you come downstairs to get some water and popcorn, wearing the tiniest, tightest pyjamas he’s ever seen. And ur unaware of the several wandering eyes cause you’re way too busy with your nose in a book, standing by the microwave. And Rick has to excuse himself for a moment to tell you to get back upstairs before he loses it and fucks you in front of his friends…

the stepdad!rick spam is EVERYTHING. i audibly squealed. i am in love with you.

you come down the stairs into the kitchen, a cherry lollipop stuck in your mouth and a book in hand. you take the candy from your mouth and smile sweetly to the group of men sitting around the kitchen table, stacks of cards and half empty beer bottles littering the scene.

"hi, daddy!" you greet rick with a kiss to his cheek. you think nothing of it. you're just being polite, after all. you skip to the cabinet and stand on your toes to reach the box of popcorn tucked inside. rick works his jaw as both your thin tank top and tiny pajama shorts ride up, exposing much of your skin. he tenses, gripping the beer bottle in his hand a bit too hard.

he loudly clears his throat when his friends' eyes linger on you for too long. your pretty bare skin, the way you suck on the lollipop as you put the bag of popcorn in the microwave. the men quickly go back to their card game, not wanting to displease rick anymore. you don't notice it. you bend over the counter and put your nose back into the book, reading while you wait for the popcorn to finish popping.

as rick watches you bend over the counter like that, lips sucking on the lollipop and eyes moving along the pages, he can't take it anymore. he gruffly excuses himself from the card game and treads to you, back to his friends so he can block their view as he admonishes you.

"what the hell do you think you're doing?" he asks, voice in a scolding whisper. you place the book on the counter and look up at him, head cocking to the side in confusion.

your voice is sweet. innocent. what a little actress, he thinks. "i don't know what you-"

"upstairs, now."

your eyebrows furrow in confusion and your bottom lip becomes wobbly. "but i-"

"now."

you know he means it. you do as he says, pouting and stomping up the stairs to your room. he excuses himself again and follows you, shutting the door and locking it behind him.

minutes later, your pajama shorts and panties are thrown to the ground, thighs pushed to your chest. you weep as his cock thrusts into your slick cunt, deeper and deeper. "m'sorry! was jus' being nice!" you cry, eyes teary and swollen lips pouty.

what a sight it was. you, the picture perfect embodiment of innocence, taking your step father's cock on your pretty pink bed while his friends wait downstairs. you whine and cling to him, moaning when his cock brushes against your g spot.

"open." he ignores your apologies and holds your jaw with his big hand, spitting on your tongue when you stick it out like the good girl you are.

he gives a slight nod so you can swallow, eyelashes fluttering up at him. your eyes are glossy, hands grabbing for him. he knows what you want. he always knows. he dips his head down to connect your lips. you mewl as he messily kisses you, nipping at your bottom lip. "fuckin' brat."

[back2bluesidex]

Slide - The Trial - MYG

Pairing: Producer!Yoongi X Lyricist!Reader 

Theme: Angst, smut, unplanned pregnancy. Fwb to ?

Word count: 1.1k+

Summary: 

"Caught in a daze, I persuade her with my own complications"

Alternatively, 

You have some questions and Yoongi has no answer.

Listened to Slide by Chase Atlantics

Warnings: Angst, reader's turning point. Yoongi's suffering has began.

Minors do not interact!!

Series Masterlist | Masterlist | Patreon (for early access)

Taglist requests are closed for now

A/N: another Yoongi's pov. before we dive into reader's post miscarriage angst. also, I have tagged everyone who asked to be tagged after I closed the request for the first time but I have only tagged the blogs which have age mentioned in their bios.

Read the next chapter

“I want a daughter first and then… ummm… probably a son too. We will name her Yunri. Yoongi plus Gyuri, Yunri.” Gyuri had told him once, latching onto his arm as if it meant everything to her. 

Yoongi knew he should have felt warmth bubbling in his chest, he knew he should have felt giddy but what he felt was dread running through the entire course of his body. 

Getting married, having kids are two of the things he never planned for in life - not even when he fell in love with Gyuri, not even when he got engaged to her somewhat against his own will. 

But now he feels weird, he feels something really really uncomfortable in his chest as he stares at your weak frail form weeping while sitting at the couch. 

His own limbs feel like jelly as he realizes again that you were pregnant and the baby was his. 

A baby - his and yours. 

Why doesn’t it feel so dreadful anymore? 

Yoongi puts the entire weight of his body on his arms and pushes himself off of the ground. His toes carry his body towards you. 

But he is afraid - what if you push him away now? What if you break when he touches you? 

What if you scatter and disappear in fine dust as soon as he gets close to you? 

What if… what if… all of this is a dream? 

You don’t look at him when he silently sits beside you. It hurts him but he knows better than putting the blame on you. 

If anyone is to be blamed, then it’s him for sure. 

Yoongi opens his mouth to say something - anything. But he only gapes like a fish out of water because his thoughts don’t form a coherent sentence. 

Your face is covered with your small palms, Yoongi wants to reach out, clutch those and apologize to you until you forgive him for all the damages he has done. 

But he can’t. 

Again he is afraid to break you even more. 

“Why.. why didn’t you tell me?” Yoongi doesn’t recognize his own voice when it leaves his throat. There is much more pain than he has heard himself speak with in a while - certainly for the first time after Gyuri left. 

You sniff, then rub tears off your eyes and stare blankly at the ceiling.

The scene is awfully similar to your and his first night together. He still recalls losing himself in those dark eyes of yours little by little and then finally diving into your abyss.  

“There are tons of reasons why. But even if I did, would it change anything?” your voice is completely opposite of his - steady, firm, doesn’t bear a single hint of all the tears he has been watching you shade. 

You are truly just another version of him. 

“That doesn’t answer my question, Y/N. Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant?” Yoongi scoots a little closer to your body. 

You sigh, a deep, resigned sigh that says you are exhausted - both mentally and physically. 

“If I told you, wouldn’t you think that this is an excuse? For keeping you all to myself? For not letting you go back to the only woman you have ever loved? Wouldn’t you, Yoongi?” You finally look at him, eyes red with continuous crying. 

Yoongi can’t stare into your eyes now. He is ashamed because you are right. He would have thought you are just like other women out there - trying to latch onto him for god knows what. 

He licks his lips instead, prepares to say something but you cut him off again. 

“Also you said … you don’t want to have kids.” your voice trembles now. 

Again you are right - Yoongi definitely doesn’t want kids. But then why losing your and his baby tugs painfully at his heartstrings? 

Why? 

“But I am responsible for your pregnancy, I- I should have been there for you.” Yoongi tries to reach out for your hand but you move away, standing on your weak feet. 

“There’s no point of regretting now. The baby is gone.” you inhale a long breath and then continue, “but I really want to know what you are doing here? At this hour? Right after rejecting me?” 

Yoongi stands up too, somewhat hyper, “I didn’t reject you. I was- I was just shocked. You ran away before- before I got to utter a single word, Y/N. I wanted to go after you but-” 

“But then the right person came to claim you and you ended up lost in her lips, am I right?” you don’t scream but anger is evident in your voice anyway. 

Yoongi recalls the doctor asking him not to stress you out any more. 

“It was a trial, Y/N. Me and Gyuri getting back together was a trial. I knew it wasn’t a good idea but when she begged me- I- I couldn’t say no. I knew I was hurting you too and I thought getting back with her would set you free. But I- I was wrong. I wasn’t free myself. I kept thinking of you.” Yoongi stops, gulps the lump in his throat and proceeds to continue, “I know I sound selfish but I got attached to you during our time together. And it is not meaningless to me as you happen to believe. You are more meaningful than most of the people in my life… including Gyuri. I… I broke things off with her, this time forever. And I came to tell you that… that I want to try being with you. If you’d let me.” 

You scoff, “and why so? Why do you want to try being with me?” 

Your question renders Yoongi speechless. He doesn’t know the answer to your question. 

“Tell me, Yoongi, why do you want to try? What is it that you feel for me?” you press more. Your new found determination of cornering him shocks him, but he knows he is the one to blame. 

And now that he wonders the answers, he can’t find any firm sentence to offer you. 

He still doesn’t know what he feels for you. 

“I- I don’t know. I don’t know what I feel for you.” 

You laugh, dry but dripping with amusement and anger, “then I would ask you to leave. You may only come back with the thought of getting together with me when you are sure about my place in your life.” 

You slowly walk away from him, taking careful steps towards your bedroom. 

Yoongi stands there as he feels the void in his chest getting bigger and bigger. A tear escapes his eyes but he still doesn’t know what he is crying for - you? The unborn baby? Or himself? 

His real trial, probably, begins here. 

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[gaywarcriminals]

Remember that time Xiao Jiu wanted to beat a kid with a brick?

The scene where Shen Jiu threatens Shi Wu is possibly my favorite scene in the whole novel because it tells us so much about qijiu's dynamic, both past and future, and namely, that they're both little freaks (affectionate) who show love in weird ways. I think it particularly exemplifies several of Yue Qingyuan's traits that often go overlooked!

I am just going in order. All excerpts are from the Seven Seas official translation, Volume 4, Chapter 24: Yue Qingyuan and Shen Qingqiu.

Shen Jiu fights for resources

“Shen Jiu, don’t think you can just throw your weight around. You don’t own this street. What gives you the right to tell us we can’t stay?!” This main street was wide and even, and many people came and went upon it. If one wanted to beg, it was the best and prime location. Some of the passersby watched this group of children fight, but even more hurried on their way. And this new brat had the gall to challenge him. Shen Jiu looked down and around, preparing to find a brick with which to teach him a lesson, when a tall youth happened to walk over. He saw Shen Jiu rolling up his sleeves, head lowered, and hastily went to stop him. “Xiao-Jiu, let’s go somewhere else.” [...] With Yue Qi standing in front of him, Shiwu grew bold. He leaned forward and yelled, “Every time we go to a new place,you always hog the best spot!

From this we know that Shen Jiu, without fail, tries to claim or fight for the best begging spots in every city. This isn't fully textually supported, but add to that the later section that mentions how Shen Jiu was far better at begging than Yue Qi and I think that, on some level, SJ feels responsible for both his and Yue Qi's wellbeing. Chasing off the other children is not just a selfish act, but also a protective one.

According to the orders given to them, Yue Qi should have wailed and wept, but no matter what, he never could manage to cry. Therefore, this task had instead fallen to Shen Jiu, even though he was faking an illness that supposedly left him too feeble to weep. But he was small and his face wasn’t too unsightly to look at, so whenever he sobbed and bawled, the passersby found him pitiful and generously opened their wallets. It would have been no exaggeration to call him a money tree.

Xiao Jiu fancies himself the breadwinner lol.

How Yue Qi reacts to accusations against Shen Jiu

That first youth took the opportunity to tattle. “Qi-ge, he’s bullying me.” “That wasn’t bullying, Shiwu,” said Yue Qi. “Xiao-Jiu was just joking around.” “Who’s joking?” said Shen Jiu. “I’m telling him to get lost. This is my territory. I’ll kill anyone who tries to steal it.”

I've anyways found this passage so telling of their eventual adult relationship! First of all, Yue Qi implicitly takes Shen Jiu's side, and immediately defends him. This seems to be taken for granted by all characters, so we can assume this is their standard dyanmic. Yue Qi, notably, does not deny that Shen Jiu was threatening Shiwu. In this situation where SJ is actively gearing up for a fight, it would be a very poor defense, and that's probably true of most messes Xiao Jiu got himself into! 

Most of Yue Qi's actions in the scene are attempts to de-escalate. This is just my theory, but I think in Yue Qi's mind, who's at fault is much less important than making sure no one gets in trouble with a higher authority. Even if he knows SJ could win the fight, it would only gain SJ more animosity, and possibly the attention of someone who would be a real danger.

I think it's evident how Yue Qi's ethos of keeping their heads down and not causing trouble or drawing too much attention would feed into how he handled Shen Qingqiu's less commendable behavior as an adult and complaints against Shen Qingqiu.

In the brothel scene later in the extras, we can see that he's conscious of their image. 

Yue Qingyuan yanked Shen Qingqiu off the bed. He was in a rare fit of anger. “Why are you like this?” “Why am I like what?” asked Shen Qingqiu. “Two of Cang Qiong Mountain’s head disciples getting into a huge brawl inside a brothel—does that sound good to you?”

Imo, now entrenched in the politics of the cultivation world, YQY sees protecting SQQ's image/reputation as an important part of protecting SQQ. Yue Qi spent his childhood managing Xiao Jiu, and as an adult, he's not able to so easily break the habit, not matter how SQQ scorns him

Shen Jiu does not get upset by attacks on his character, only from Shiwu calling Yue Qi "Qi-ge"

With Yue Qi standing in front of him, Shiwu grew bold. He leaned forward and yelled, “Every time we go to a new place,you always hog the best spot! Everyone’s been sick of you for ages! You think you’re all that? That everyone’s afraid of you?” “Shiwu,” Yue Qi scolded. Amidst the struggle, Shen Jiu kicked Yue Qi in the shin. “If you want a fight, I’ll give you one. Only losers would blame their spot for their incompetence. You bastard—who’s your Qi-ge? I dare you to say that again!”

Now granted these aren't the most cutting insults, but it's SO interesting to me that Shen Jiu doesn't react to the insults directly. To me, this is a little bit of evidence that, even at this age, Shen Jiu had already decided he was a bad guy, and stopped caring about what others thought of him. The glaring exception to that was, ofc, Yue Qi. I think part of the reason that SJ reactions to the "Qi-ge" specifically, is that Shiwu just said that no one likes Shen Jiu, and then tried to align himself with Yue Qi. I think to SJ, he sees a real threat in the idea of someone else stealing Yue Qi, the one person who likes SJ. SJ is so possessive of Yue Qi not just because he's Qi-ge, but also because, without him, Shen Jiu would have nothing and no one.

Yue Qi tries to deescalate by coaxing/appeasing Shen Jiu

“You’re the bastard! I bet you’ll get sold off soon and end up a pimp!” Yue Qi didn’t know whether to laugh or to cry. “Where did you learn that kind of nonsense language?!” Then he dragged Shen Jiu off to the side of the road while coaxing him. “All right, you’re the most competent one here. Even if you didn’t pick and choose your spot, you’d be the best. So let’s change streets.” Shen Jiu stepped on his foot. “Get off me! Like I’m scared! Come on, fight me! Wanna gang up on me? Go ahead!” Of course Yue Qi knew he wasn’t scared. If he really let Shen Jiu brawl with the other kids, he would fight dirty. He’d gouge at their eyes and kick them in the belly or crotch or shin. He was terribly vicious, and the other party would be the one to end up suffering and bawling in terror. Yue Qi forced down a smile. “Are you done stepping on my foot yet? If you are, stop it. Qi-ge will take you somewhere fun.” “What shitty ‘fun’?” Shen Jiu asked savagely. “The most fun I’ll have is if they’re all dead.” Yue Qi looked at him helplessly and shook his head.

Yue Qi only barely scolds Shen Jiu, even when Shen Jiu in the wrong (tried to steal Shiwu's spot and then almost beat up Shiwu). Instead, his reaction is to distract, coax, bribe, and praise him until SJ looses interest in whatever trouble he was going to cause. Yue Qi is so biased, and he spoils him 😂. Even when Yue Qi has so little he can give, he managed to spoil Shen Jiu by giving him so much favor, attention, and affection. 

I think this is something that comes naturally to Yue Qi to the point that he can't help himself from doing the same thing as an adult, even when SJ scorns him. It's just the correct response to seeing a Xiao Jiu! He's the "why do we have hands" meme fr 

Yue Qi smiles imagining Shen Jiu beating up the other kids

Of course Yue Qi knew he wasn’t scared. If he really let Shen Jiu brawl with the other kids, he would fight dirty. He’d gouge at their eyes and kick them in the belly or crotch or shin. He was terribly vicious, and the other party would be the one to end up suffering and bawling in terror. Yue Qi forced down a smile. “Are you done stepping on my foot yet? If you are, stop it. Qi-ge will take you somewhere fun.”

I don't have much to say about this, I just want to remind everyone Yue Qi finds SJ's violent, feral tendencies adorable. This man has no desire to train his cat, and he will insist it's friendly even as it gnaws on his arm.

In Conclusion?

This single scene shows us the trajectory of qijiu's relationship going forward, the strengths of their relationships that became pitfalls. It allows to imagine what they could have become if not torn apart by a world set to doom them.

[splishfish]

Audio Fun (NSFW)

Tomura Shigaraki x Reader

Tags: M. Masturbation, Tomura being a gross pervert, idk what else lol

WC: 1.1K

God he missed you so much.

Audio Fun Deleted Scene

It was late. Nearly 3 am.

Tomura laid in bed, his face illuminated only slightly by the dim light of his phone. His hand gripped onto the phone tightly, red eyes staring at the voice recording he had gotten earlier that day.

He reached over towards the floor, grabbing a pair of earbuds that were lazily strewn across the floor. His heart thumped in his chest, hands growing sweaty as debauched and lewd thoughts raced through his mind, his earbuds connecting to his phone as he placed them into his ears.

You had been gone for a few days, visiting your family for the holidays. Earlier that day, you had called him, updating him on all the fun things you and your family were doing. He won’t lie, he was pissed off.

He didn’t understand why you had to go visit your family when you had him now. He could give you anything you wanted, hell, he’d even participate in those stupid holiday festivities you loved so much.

But he couldn’t let his mind wander off. After all, he was so painfully hard, and those unfulfilling thoughts would only put a ruin his mood. A harrowing smile formed on his face as he pressed play on the 30 minute voice recording, your voice flowing into his ears.

Maybe if he had even the slightest semblance of shame, he would feel more embarrassed about using your voice to get off, but you had been gone for so long, could you really blame him for wanting to ease that awful ache in his pants?

”Hey baby! How have you been?”

Your sweet voice was intoxicating to him. You were so eager to talk to him, and that little pet name you had called him made his cock twitch.

He reached down, sliding his hand under his pants to release his cock, just barely raising his hips to lower his pants just far down enough to free his hefty balls and his weeping cock.

”Things have been good here! I haven’t seen my family in so long, it’s nice to catch up!”

A small groan left his lips, his hand finally pumping his twitching cock and squeezing pearly beads of pre out of his slit. The debauched smile on his face grew, a small stinging in his cracked lips as his mind was filled with vile thoughts. He wondered what you would think of him, masturbating to the sound of your voice while you’re happily talking about your little family meetup.

”I miss you so much! I’ll be home in a few days okay?”

He let out a sigh, his thumb running over his leaking slit. Fuck. He missed you so much. He missed the feeling of your tight hole wrapping around his cock. He missed your pretty whines and moans. He missed the way you would cry and beg for his cock.

His hips bucked up slightly, closing his eyes and tilting his head back as he groaned. God he missed you.

”How have things been going over there? Have you been eating?”

If he wasn’t so busy jerking himself off, he would have rolled his eyes at your words. He couldn’t understand why you were so worried about useless things. It was stupid, really, the way you concerned yourself over him, the way you sounded so caring and selfless. 

It made both his heart flutter and his balls tighten.

”But…as much as I love being here, I miss you. I can’t wait to come back home.” Home.

A low groan left his mouth, his hand tightening around the base of his cock.

 “Fuck…”

God he missed you so much. He missed your tender touches. He missed your scent, your body, your voice. He missed you.

His hand moved faster under the blanket, a muffled ’shlck shlck shlck’ could be heard, even through his earbuds.

”To be honest I- Hey! Are you even listening?!”

He chuckled breathlessly at your whiny tone, and all he could imagine was the way your lips were probably curled into a cute pout…so kissable, so pretty and soft. Ah…he missed the way your lips wrapped around his cock, glossy with pre-cum and spit as he fucked your face just the way you liked it.

His hand reached up, pulling back the foreskin from his tip to roughly thumb his aching slit. He hissed at the feeling, wishing it was your tongue that curled around his cock.

”Tomura? Tomura! Hey! Don’t ignore me!” He barely registered the whine that escaped him, too distracted by the way you called out his name. So desperate for his attention, so needy and wanting. Fuck, he wanted you so bad. He wanted to fuck you until the only thing you could scream was his name, slobbering like a bitch in heat as you desperately fucked yourself on his cock.

His hand began to twist against his length, pumping himself furiously as he finally started to feel that burning heat in his stomach. He was so close. So so close.

”Hey…y’know I uh…I was thinking…when I get home…we could spend some…time catching up…if you know what I mean…” Oh god. Fuuck…

He ripped the blanket off his searing hot body, placing the phone on the pillow next to him as he brought his now free hand to his testicles. He rolled them against his palm, squeezing them as he bucked his hips desperately into his hand, thoughts of your return filling his mind.

He was going to fucking ruin you. He was going to fuck you until he stuffed you full of his cum, over and over and over-!

”I’ve felt so empty without you Tomu…I miss your cock so much…Wanna stuff myself with your cock...”

It was almost painful how violently he was fisting himself, his calloused hands slick with his arousal as he desperately chased his high. Low moans and curses left his lips in strings of pleasure, his eyes rolling back as he felt the heat in his stomach begin to snap.

“Fuck fuck fuck-!”

He was gonna cum. He was gonna cum while fisting himself to the sound of your voice. Oh fuck he was gonna cum and you were completely oblivious! You were probably sleeping in bed, snoring away while he fantasized about fucking you in all sorts of ways when you came home-!

”Would you like that Tomu?”

Yes! God yes! He wanted to fuck you so bad!

He was right there- Fuck oh god he can feel his balls tighten with need, sweat dripping down from his forehead as he moved his arm in a burning workout. Fuck, he’s cummi-!

”Audio Disconnected” His eyes snapped open as the robotic voice of his earbuds echoed in his ears, the sudden burning heat in his stomach snapping as he cursed in anger, semen limply spurting onto his stomach and chest in a weak stream.

“Oh you FUCKING-!”

Maybe he should charge his earbuds before using them next time.

Did you enjoy this? Check out my Masterlist for more!

Hello!! This idea came from @arakn0 on their twitter! Pls go check them out on all their socials, theyre so cool and awesome! TY Arakno for letting me use this idea <3

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Do you agree that Chloe only cared about Adrien cause of his social status ? Cause that's what Astruc has said on Twitter regarding how Chloe viewed her friendship with Adrien. Do you believe this intent of their relationship was portrayed correctly in the show ?

I think that this statement accurately describes the way that Chloe was written in season one. She never read as Adrien's close friend and we got scenes like these two from Dark Cupid where she wanted his autograph to show off for some reason:

Chloé: Hi Adrien, sign here please. Adrien: (sighs) Oh, come on, you know I hate signing autographs, Chloé. Chloé: Oh, that's not what this is. This is a petition against cruelty to hamsters. Have you seen some of the ugly sweaters they are forced to wear? It's appalling. (Adrien begrudgingly signs the poster. Chloé hugs the poster and Sabrina smiles before they notice Marinette who is digging through a trash can as she pulls out a sheet of paper.)

[Scene change]

Chloé: Keep dreaming all you want girls but the boy is mine. (Sabrina nods before unrolling the poster, the girls gasping) Aurore: "To Chloé, the most awesome girl in the world and the love of my life. Signed, Adrien." (All the girls begin to cry, then Chloé looks at one girl who tries not to burst out crying) Chloé: Uh, she's not crying enough.

However, much like Alya's obsession with Ladybug's secret identity and Adrien's ability to leave his house, this part of Chloe's character disappeared after season one, making it feel like something they tried and then decided to discard. While that's not a sign of great writing quality, it's also not a neon warning sign. It's not unusual for formula shows to have these kinds of growing pains. First seasons often have random things that contradict later seasons such as everything about Nathalie's season one writing.

So while season one backs this read, I don't think it's fair to say that Chloe read this way any time after season one and season one is full of things that got discarded, so it's not grasping at straws to say that season one Chloe wasn't fully formed. This is especially true because of the way the writers reintroduced her in both Origins and season two.

Origins introduced many new elements such as Adrien's social isolation and the wish that was driving Gabriel to terrorize Paris. In other words, it's the episode that lays the groundwork for the entire show. If a thing is in Origins, then it matters because the writers only had 40 minutes to establish every important element for how they want these character to be read. This is a problem because Origins didn't make Chloe a vapid mean girl who clung to new boy Adrien. Instead, Origins had Adrien walk into school, see Chloe, and call her by name, leading her to reply with a dorky childhood nickname:

Adrien: Hey, Chloé! Chloé: Adrikins! You came!

She's also the only person who knows that Adrien will be starting school this year because, for some reason, Origins made the choice to elevate Adrien and Chloe's relationship to close childhood friends. That is NOT the kind of move you make if you want Chloe to feel like someone who only cares about Adrien for his fame. While that may potentially happen in real life, this is a story. The writers have full control over the characters' backstories. Who in their right mind picks a childhood friends backstory to complicate things if they don't want Chloe to really care about Adrien as a person?

Despair Bear only further contradicts this "Chloe doesn't care" idea by having Chloe break down over the idea of Adrien ending their friendship:

Jean: Mademoiselle does not look very happy, today. (lifts up a plate of luxury chocolates and offers them to Chloé.) (Chloé grabs the chocolates all at once and eats them, concurrently, and then weeps) Chloé: Adrien says I have to be nice to everyone or he won't be my friend anymore! How can he do this to me, Jean-Michel? Jean: Uh, my name is... hm, never mind. Ah, perhaps Mademoiselle can see comfort with Mr. Cuddly? (Chloé is delighted and grabs Mr. Cuddly, her teddy bear, and hugs it)

[Image description: Chloe crying and eating chocolates because Adrien said they can't be friends anymore]

This is not the kind of reaction you give a character who doesn't care about Adrien on a personal level. She comes across as caring about him deeply. If she didn't care, then she'd probably just brush him off and say, "Your loss." But she doesn't. She reacts with the same sort of sorrow that we see when her parents are akumatized or when her mother refuses to acknowledge her.

We also see her go out of her way to try to appease Adrien by throwing a party and forcing herself to play nice so that he stays her friend. She only stops playing nice when he promises that they'll stay friends:

Adrien: That was a great idea of inviting Marinette's dad! Chloé: I know. This way, no one can be mad at me for calling the fire department. I'm really nice now, did you notice, Adrikins? Even Ladybug said so! Didn't she, Jean-Pascal? Adrien: I'm proud of you, Chloé. I think you've proven that you're capable of making an effort to be nicer to everyone. Chloé: Aww, Adrikins! So we'll always be best friends, forever? Pinky swear? Adrien: Pinky swear! Chloé: (Exhales and saunters off) (To Kim) So, those macarons are dreadfully ugly. (Kim sighs.) (To Mylène.) Those are so greasy, you can see yourself in them. (Mylène cries and faint.) (To Marinette.) Urgh. Too disgusting for comment. (To Rose.) Those look horrible. (Rose faints.)

That is more effort than Chloe has ever put into anything on screen and that's a problem because - once again - this is not how you write a vapid mean girl who doesn't care. This is how you write someone who actually cares about Adrien. They even chose to show us young Chloe and young Adrien being cute during Chloe's "flashback" to getting her teddy bear:

[Image description: Teen Chloe surrounded by drawings of important childhood memories with her teddy bear. We see her getting the bear from a faceless figure, holding the bear as her mother walks away, sleeping with the bear, holding the bear while she cries, and excitedly showing the bear to a young Adrien]

There's also the issue that, after season one, Chloe doesn't seem to actually care that much about social clout. At that start of this post, I used a scene from Dark Cupid specifically because it feels kind of out of character for her. In the later seasons, Chloe may flaunt her social status and think that it makes her better than others, but she doesn't do things like the poster thing because that requires her to care what random people think and that's just not how she reads. Chloe reads more like someone who doesn't care what most people think because she thinks that she's better than them (or, at least, she wants to think that. Chloe has the potential to be a fun little ball of self-hatred and doubt, but either way, she is acting like she doesn't care what other people think outside of a very select group.)

I think this really shows when we compare Chloe to Lila. Lila reads like someone who cares about social clout. Someone who is desperate to be seen in a certain way. Someone who sees dating Adrien as a status symbol and nothing more. Chloe reads like someone who sees Adrien as the only person of her caliber, so of course they'd get together. That's a subtle, but very important difference. It's the difference between someone who doesn't have social clout and needs Adrien to get it and someone who already has social clout and therefore doesn't need a popular boyfriend to prop her up. She just thinks dating an unpopular boy is beneath her.

I've mentioned before that Chloe reads SUPER aroace to me and this is actually why. To me, it comes across like she does actually care deeply about Adrien, but she has no true romantic or sexual feelings for him or even any clue what those feelings actually feel like. Given the way her parents' relationship is written, I also don't see Chloe having a healthy idea of what a romantic relationship looks like. I think she sees it as a way to show off how much better you are then the nobodies of the world because love is for fairytales. Marriage is about alliances of wealth and power and Adrien is both wealthy and her childhood friend, so of course they'd get married! They already know that they can at least tolerate each other. Why look for a different match?

In summary: the writers may have wanted Chloe to be a vapid mean girl who didn't care about Adrien as a person, but they completely failed to write her that way after season one, so she comes across as genuinely caring, but unable to express those feelings in a healthy way because of her own issues and poor childhood.

[butterflybuckethat]

Crybaby

Hello! Found this sitting in my drafts so I thought I’d post it. I’m trying to return so please be patient with me and I appreciate all of your kind words 💕 My plan is to start fresh and expand from Bridgerton (currently in a bit of a Carmen Berzatto shaped hole — stay tuned!)

Notes: Prince Friedrich x Bridgerton!Reader 

Request: I would like to request prince friederich x Bridgerton reader, cause I love him so much. Preferably something really cute and fluffy or he finds reader crying and comforts her either way I’ll be happy thank you

🦋 Masterlist 🦋

You were being ridiculous, you knew you were and yet you couldn’t keep the tears from flowing. You cried often, over a wide range of somethings--anywhere from a spilt milk to death. Your siblings teased you often, mostly after you were finished weeping. Mostly. 

It was Daphne’s birthday, and you being the sibling closest to her--in age and affection--decided that you would plan her an extravagant birthday party; a surprise extravagant birthday party. 

It had taken you an entire month to bring it all together and, as far as you could tell, Daphne suspected nothing. You had it all set up with crystal butterflies and floral accents and lemonade infused with exotic fruits. It was shaping up to be an absolute crush with the entirety of ton buzzing in anticipation of the birthday girl’s arrival. You even managed the attendance of Prince Friedrich of Prussia.  

“Where is Daph?” Colin sidled up to you, an eclair already stuffed in his mouth. 

“You mean she’s not in the carriage?”

“How am I do know if she’s in the carriage or not?” 

“Colin,” you huffed, “you were to ensure that she got into the carriage we scheduled for her.”

“Oh.” 

Your vision went blurry as tears began to well, “Colin, how could you?” Despite the frequency, you were still embarrassed by the rasp of your voice. Colin apologized profusely, doing everything but getting on his knees. He could never handle your tears, none of your brothers could; only Benedict, whose response was a roll of his eyes and a half-hearted hug. 

“I will find her, Y/N. I’m sure she is on her way.” People were staring now and you were praying no one could see your tears. You brought your hands to your cheeks, feigning checking your rouge but really soaking the tears in your gloves. “I will fix this,” Colin said, placing his hands on your shoulders. 

You felt the tears welling up again as you watched Colin make a beeline to the butler and could feel Cressida Cowper’s judgmental eyes narrowing on you. You swiped a glass of lemonade off the table and moved into the smaller of the two drawing rooms. It was closed off to the public allowing you to plop down on the divan, take some deep breaths, and press the cool glass to your swollen eyes. 

“Lady Bridgerton?” The room was dark but you couldn’t mistake the accent, it was Prince Friedrich.

“Your highness!” you stood so fast some lemonade spilled onto the carpet. 

“Please,” he gestured for you to sit but remained mostly in the doorway with the door wide open, for propriety’s sake. “I only wanted to check if you were alright.”

“I did not mean to take you from the party,” you demurred. He dismissed that thought with nothing more than a gesture. “I’m certain Daphne will arrive shortly.” 

“I’m more concerned about you.” He stepped into the room, close to the arm of the sofa. You breath caught in your throat. This...was strange. 

You had spoken to the Prince before, of course. Nothing serious but he had his sights on Daphne and, subsequently, you were frequently in close proximity. “I did not mean to cause a scene,” you were a little flustered at this point and were just searching for words to fill the space.

“I don’t think any of the guests noticed...” 

“My tears?”

“Your tears,” he nodded. Prince Friedrich had not moved but you could have sworn he got closer. “I believe this is the third time I have seen them.” 

You started to groan before you forced it to die on your tongue--it was terribly unladylike, especially in front of a prince. “I’m embarrassed.”

“Please, don’t be.” His hand ghosted over your wrist and your blood rushed. 

“I can’t help it. I cry so often my mother used to call me Blue.” You pressed the glass back against your face in an attempt to quell your blush, but Friedrich laughed. It was kind of a deep chuckle; not much but it made you smile. 

“I rather like that, Blue,” he mused. 

“Daphne is here!” someone cried from the ballroom and you rushed over, helping people hide behind tables and walls before hiding yourself. Most of the candles were blown out, dimming the room completely. You, yourself, hid behind a large centerpiece with Friedrich beside you. You were much too enthralled with all your planning coming to fruition to appropriately react to the Prince of Prussia being mere inches from you. 

“We aren’t supposed to enter the ballroom, Colin!” Daphne chastised, “it’s being painted!” You smiled a little at her belief in your ruse. You could feel Friedrich’s eyes on you, just a glance, but all your hair stood on end.

“You’re scared of paint, Daphne?” Colin teased. She would be mortified when she found out he said this in front of so many people. 

“Of course not. Don’t be ridiculous-”

“Surprise!” you jumped out, along with the rest of the guests, as the servants lit the rest of the candles. 

“Well done,” the prince whispered, lips grazing the shell of your ear. “Now go accept your praise. No more tears tonight.”

[brotherwtf]

re mota rewatch

"Egan wouldn't let us ship it to your folks, kept saying I expect him back, my buddy's just MIA" CRAZY WORK BY THE FUCKING WAY

it's also fucking crazy how Gale looks even more melancholy and in love looking at that damn lucky deuce than when he looks at the straight up picture of Marge, something happened to you while you were overseas major? AND HE PUTS IT IN HIS DAMN POCKET? A REMINDER/HOPE THAT HES STILL ALIVE? THAT HES GOING TO COME BACK? SICK ACTUALLY

also the scene where Bucky puts up the flag never fails to make me fucking sob, the emotion is so fucking palpable, the terror, the fear is almost fucking over, all of the shit they went through, it could be done, everything they fought for was actually for something as opposed to nothing, it's such a good fucking scene

IVE ALREADY FUCKING WROTE A DRABBLE ABOUT THIS BUT THE FUCKING "YOU HEARD ME THE FIRST GODDAMN TIME GALE" SCENE IS SO FUCKING CRAZY TO ME you can see the relief on Gale's face, the bite of his lip to hide anything more than a relieved smile, and it's the first time (I think someone fact check me on this) that John actually calls Gale by his name, and it's all just to show that he made it back, he survived, and he's back, he's back with Gale

and the end of the war scene is also so beautifully melancholy, life of the party John Egan decided to spend the evening with Gale, somewhere quiet, that damn control tower, sharing a drink with the person he cares about the most, it's so sweet and heartbreaking at the same time how much the war changed them, how much they truly have changed

there's a little exchange that I'm probably reading too much into but when John asks Gale if he's ready to see Marge, Gale kind of laughs, shakes his head, like Johns asking something sarcastic, and I just think that's fucking crazy

and the fucking fact that John was right, he and Gale were the last B-17s in the air, it was Gale flying it, right alongside him, God it's enough to make me curl up and weep

the end credits of this will never fail to make me cry, it made my dad break down and sob when we first watched it together and it still makes me cry, the violin version of the opening theme, something melancholic and reflective, oh my God and that final picture of the real John Egan and Gale Cleven? head in my hands I'm gonna be sick

and that has been my mota rewatch!! be on the lookout for a full post mortem later where I fully debrief 🥰🥰

[invisible-lint]

Before and After: Nightmares

Lucien x Archeron!Reader

Summary: the first in a series of drabbles before and after you went into the cauldron

Warnings: angst. angstier than I intended oops

Word Count: 1.2K

You grab a knife off a fae distracted by what Amarantha is doing to your twin. You are not one of them. She can't stop you. You may not be able to kill her, but you will not let Feyre go down alone. You stalk forward, ready to try, prepared to die with her, when warm arms circle around your body. "Don't," Lucien whispers. Your gasp of indignation shifts to a scream of rage and horror when Feyre's neck snaps, the cruel fae queen finally done torturing her. You scream, not noticing as the masks fall off the faces of the spring court fae. You scream and scream, thrashing against him, trying to get loose, the knife still gripped in your hand as Lucien holds you. You scream until your throat is raw and you can't scream anymore. And then suddenly through some miracle performed by the high lords, she's alive again. Changed. Fae. But alive. And you sob, your body going limp, the knife clattering to the stone floor. You sob and Lucien continues to hold you.

You’re not sure what it was that woke you, the air, suddenly cold from the blankets being thrown back, or Lucien calling your name. You swing at him wildly, perceiving him as a threat in your sleep-addled terror. He grabs your hand, holding it until you’re awake enough for clarity to come across your features. He crawls into bed with you, pulling you into his arms as you start crying. He presses soft kisses to the top of your head, whispering reassurances into your hair, his hand against the small of your back. He holds you like this, waiting for you to be ready to tell him what this nightmare had been about. You had them more often than not. Sometimes, about your own experiences Under the Mountain, but more often, you relived Feyre’s death. Terrified by how powerless you were to stop it, how utterly powerless you would be to prevent anything else from happening to her.  Lucien just holds you, knowing that you’ll tell him what it was about when you’re ready. 

“I was back Under the Mountain. Watching Feyre die.” He looks at you, brushing hair back from your face. “I’ll never be able to save her, will I? I couldn’t then and now… Now the thing that is hurting her is not something I can take a knife and try to kill. The aftermath…. It is suffocating her. She is drowning and there is nothing that I can do. What are you supposed to do when you so desperately want to save someone you love and can’t?”

He looks at you momentarily, trying to find the words that will comfort you. How can he, when he feels the same way about you and your mortality? Every day is like a ticking clock drawing closer to the moment when he will lose you, and no matter how much he may know it’s coming, he knows he will never be prepared.  

“I don’t know… I wish I did…” His voice is so soft, that with your human ears, you almost don’t hear him. You nod, making a sound that’s half sniffle, half sigh. 

“Will you stay with me?” You ask, voice soft as tiredness begins to creep back over you.

“Of course. Always.”

"You'd truly neutralize the cauldron? Aren't you at all curious about what it can do? How it can help you? Save your human twin, doomed to die before you?" You hear the king speak as his guards drag you in, fear bright in your eyes. You look to Feyre, to the family you've found in the night court and you could weep at the state of them. You hold your chin high, hoping to radiate bravery you don't feel as Feyre begs. You don't fight, you don't make a scene as the guards drag you to the large cauldron in the center of the room. You bite back your scream as they lower you in, the inky water so cold it's painful. And you don't fight as you're submerged, floating, suspended in a space much larger than what the cauldron should hold. The icy hot liquid burns your body as you change until finally, you're being dumped out onto the stone floor, shivering, sputtering, and coughing. Your new fae senses are immediately overwhelming. It's all too much. The sobbing, the begging. Nesta’s cries of fury. Elain’s sobbing. The sickening scent of blood. Even the stone floor, is far too cold and rough against your skin. You wish you could just close your eyes and fall asleep, fade into blissful unconsciousness where nothing is too much. You flinch, looking up as Lucian drapes his coat over you, no longer sure what he is to you. You try to tell yourself that you don’t care about the sadness in his eyes at your fear and uncertainty towards him. You just want it to all be over. You just want-

You awaken suddenly, shoving the male away from you. You move across the bed, putting as much space between your bodies as you can, grabbing a hairbrush from the vanity to arm yourself, before realizing it was Lucien. He watches you, hands raised in front of him, as if to calm you like you were a frightened animal. You throw the brush at the wall a foot or so away from him, hoping to drive him away. But he stays, watching you. You grab something else and throw it, this item shattering against the wall, but still he doesn’t leave. You hate the way he looks at you, hate the regret that fills his eyes. The pity. You throw something else towards the bathing room.

“Get out!” You scream, not caring how loud you’re being, not caring if you wake the whole of Spring. But he doesn’t, he just stands there, watching, waiting. After a few minutes, the sobs come and you sink to the ground. He crosses the room, sinking down next to you, pulling you into his arms. Tonight, you let him, some part of you tired of shoving him away, when you so desperately want him there. You cling to him, sobbing into his chest and he holds you tight. He brushes your hair out of your face, keeping it from clumping in your tears. He’s glad that you can’t see his face, seeing the tears that are threatening to spill. He knows that this is his fault. He couldn’t stop you from going into the cauldron and now you hate him. His mate hates him, and most of the time, he believes he deserves it. He flinches, startled out of his thoughts by your hand on his face. He leans into the tender touch, savoring it, despite his surprise.

“Why do you keep coming back when I treat you this way?” you ask.

“Because I deserve it. You should hate me.” I hate me is left unsaid.

“No, you don’t. I don’t.” You shouldn’t.

“Why not? I should have stopped it. Stopped them.”

“Perhaps. But what could you have done? Against Tamlin? Against… It wouldn’t have made a difference.” He says nothing, knowing that you’re right, but not wanting to agree.

“You couldn’t have done anything more than I could have with that knife Under the Mountain. I used to wonder why you didn’t try harder to stop Tamlin from suffocating her.”

“And now?”

You look him in the eyes. “Now I know you’re just as powerless as I am.”

A/N: And there's fic 2 on the blog! I have a few ideas for the next chapter of both this one and Everything Could Be Okay. Hopefully, the next one for Lucien will be fluffier, he certainly deserves it!

divider once again by @tsunami-of-tears

[bella-goths-wife]

I feel like we should have an actor au for the pet series where like the vees actors comfort the actor (who is the reader) after really distressing scenes I just like imagine vals actor being so sweet after the scene where val locked pet in a room with him to make her panic idk just a thought I would love to see because even though I luv the story line it always kills me when there is no comfort after things that happen even though sometimes they do comfort her it just makes me feel so icky and I feel like having an actor au will help people like me so that we can still enjoy it, with the reminder in the back of our heads that it is not real because even though its not real it still kinda feels real if you know what i mean because I get really immersed in x reader stories. I know this is a lot but just a suggestion no pressure I will still read and love it either way

I actually think this is a fun way to comfort the readers without straying from canon, I think I’ll probably do one for each of the characters each

Also they all have the same names as their characters :)

Vs pet actor au (Valentino version)

Warnings: val is worried, pet acts panicked, crying, non canon events,

“Come here princesa” val coos in his characters voice to your character as you act out a fake shiver of fear

You act out the scene of abuse with fake tears streaming down your face. The scene was one that you had been nervous about for weeks, having known that it was a disturbing scene to watch and film.

In the scene, vals character had locked your character in a room with him to imply that he would possibly assault her like he had done to angels character to cause her to panic and breakdown.

You and val had gone over lines together in your trailer and lamented about how it would be a rough filming day for the two of you, considering you had the punishment scene to film just after.

But you put on a brave face as you acted out your scene with minimal distraction. You followed the script and your weeping character sat beside Val on the soft couch as the camera did a close up on your face to ensure they captured the panic in your eyes and the quiver in your bitten lips.

as it came time for val’s character Valentino to touch your thigh in a menacing implication, he did so and you felt a shiver uncomfortably run through you.

You suddenly became hyper aware of the people behind the cameras who had their eyes peeled on you, and how the pink lighting shined so brightly on you.

As your cue came to jump into val’s arms, you froze completely with your face lowered to your thigh and tears running down your cheeks.

“Cut” the director called out and it broke you out your frozen daydream

“Everything okay kid?” Val whispers with a concerned look as he removes his hand from your thigh

“I don’t think I can do it” you whisper back through tears as you face your back to the cameras

“Everything okay up there guys?” The director called out with a concerned expression

Val uses his wings to hide your face and tucked you against his chest before he answered, making sure to spare you any embarrassment.

“We’re gonna need a 15 minute break” val called back politely “private please”

The director nodded with an understanding look before calling most of the set to go on a break away from the filming Scene.

Val turned to you and put a hand on your shoulder.

“Are you okay kid?” Val asks with a worried look as he pulls you away from his chest to observe your expression

“Yeah” you say with a shaky inhale as you wipe your tearful eyes with your palm “it all got a bit much for me”

“I get it kid, it’s a hard scene to film for everyone” val says with a nod and a soothing tone “that’s why I tried to put it off for as long as possible”

“I’m just not used to doing scenes like this guess” you say with a sigh “I had the same problem with Vox during our panic scene, I think it just gets too much for me”

“Your playing a very difficult role honey, it’s understandable that you’ll get a bit freaked out during your scenes” val says gently

“I can’t believe I made them stop shooting, I bet they’re all so mad at me now” you say with an embarrassed groan “I should have just continued”

“Hey, hey, no one is mad at you” val says with a reassuring tone “your having to put yourself in very disturbing scenarios, you have every right to stop filming when you feel uncomfortable and anyone who tells you otherwise hasn’t got a clue about how much work these scenes take”

You nod with a frown, still embarrassed about your freak out, Val notices and wraps his arm around your shoulder

“How about we go get some water and then go talk to the intimacy coordinator about how we can make it feel less overwhelming” val suggests with a smile “or we can try and ask if we could use your body double for the scenes where my hand is physically touching you”

“Yeah” you say with a small nod and a smile “let’s go talk to the intimacy coordinator please”

“Of course sweetheart” val says with a gentle smile as he wraps his hand and wing around your shoulders and begins to guide you to the door.

You managed to work out a way to make the scene to work after a few different attempts and you captured your best shots before retreating to your trailer with Val in tow as you both celebrated a successful scene by eating food while you had your wigs, makeup and costumes removed.

After that day, Val made it a point to always be present during your harder scenes and was always checking in on you during the breaks between takes. He also made sure to update the intimacy coordination on your preferences so they could be added to your filming contract.

You were the youngest of the actors he was working with, and he wanted to make sure you were completely protected while on set.

Should I do more?

Sorry it’s so short 😭

Tag list:

@the-faceless-bride @idontreallyexistyet @ivebeenthearchersstuff @hazbinhotelxreader @fandomaddict505 @corvid007 @buttercupfangirl @lilyalone @rerarlo @perkypeony @sparkleyfishies @repostingmyfavs

[chogiwow]

for well and for good | park sunghoon

pairing: sunghoon x gn!reader

genre: angst

wc: 1k

warnings: allusions to a toxic past relationship (sunghoon and unnamed ex), crying (a lot), hurt-no-comfort fic, heartbreak; sunghoon realises his feelings for you too late

a/n: all i want is to break hearts <3

a/n pt 2: umm, not a solid plot but more so like a scene building concept?

there wasn’t a more heartbreaking moment than this, not for sunghoon; not even when the consequences of his actions that led him here had played out exactly as you had warned him it would.

now it was too late, and beg as he might, a heavy feeling in his chest slowly settled against his favour, a premonition turning true and cry as much as he wanted, everything was spiralling out of control so fast, he wasn’t sure who he should save first.

“(y/n)...(y/n) please, i can’t do this, i can’t live without you. i’m sorry, i’m so sorry, please don’t leave, i need you…i love you.”

the more he weeped for a lost cause, the more it hurt your chest and ripped you apart piece by piece but you made no attempts at stopping the pain.

everyone had always assumed that you and sunghoon would be the endgame. it was so obvious! you both were head over heels for each other, but of course, of course the heart wavers ever so often now and then. sunghoon let himself ignore all the signs, pretend that the affection and sweet words weren’t another ploy for his wealth, his looks, his popularity, the safety and love he was so willing to provide someone, because he was always so very generous. generous and ridiculously naive; always looking to give away a piece of himself to anyone who so much as asked for it.

and a man in love is hard to sway again, especially when the man is sunghoon, with his giving nature and so much love that filled his heart that he couldn’t contain it any longer.

words were said – spit almost venomously at the cost of saving face and pride, and how dare you question his love and hers, when you had no business? how dare you make assumptions about this beautiful woman who loved him – at least he hoped she did – as much as he did?

and then…and then everything you said came true. your warnings carefully etched themselves like knife carvings on a paper – vehemently and so very stubbornly irreversible. now he’s here, after months of grieving not just the loss of his trust in love, but also you. and he had to make things right, but how does one convince a person they've broken and trampled upon so mercilessly, that they are indeed in love with them?

how does sunghoon convince you that he’s so utterly in love with you that he could physically feel the pain of your pointed ignoring and cold looks? how does he even begin to express how sorry he was when the unsaid apology squeezed the breath out of him in aggrieved pants? how does sunghoon not lose you again?

“”i’m sorry hoon, i can’t do this anymore. i can’t love you anymore, i don’t want to love you anymore…you’ve hurt me too much.”

“(y/n) please, please i beg you,”

and beg he did; getting down on his knees on the cold tile floors of your living room, he wrapped his arms around your waist and dampened your shirt with his hot tears. neither he nor you were making much sense of this conversation anymore.

he felt you shake in his embrace, your own tears and gasps of air breaking his chants of an apology, his hands tightening around you to physically feel your touch after months.

“hoon stop it,” a wretched sob, ugly as it sounded when it tumbled out of your lips in pain, like a helpless rotten fruit falling off its branches, makes you whimper and clutch onto the clinging man's hand who refused to let you go.

in a hurried motion sunghoon is up on his feet, holding you by the shoulder that shakes with the cries staining your cheeks.

“i can’t live without you, please give me another chance,” he shakes his head frantically, mumbling out his words in a frenzy as he is yet again painfully reminded of exactly how weighted his words were and how much truth they held in them. it weighed him down, your refusal to look past this, like a sack of cotton drowning in water, and yet he could not bring himself to blame you, hoping against hope that his words would make a change.

his lips find your forehead, pressing down on them in a hot kiss; the trembling of his lips breaks you, you wish would stop – but he doesn’t. he’s kissing your shoulder, your arms, your wrists, your palms and he’s kissing your forehead – again and again and again and again – until you push yourself away, your eyes closed, shaking your head.

“don’t, it’s time we stopped this. we can’t hope for things that were never meant to be.”

sunghoon was standing on the edge of a cliff, and you just pushed him off into a bottomless pit that made his insides curl into themselves, his hands shooting in the air for something to grasp but there’s only air that passes through his fingers like bullets.

in his last attempt he kisses you on the lips. he holds your face so gently and kisses you so deeply and for a moment you feel yourself swaying. you let him kiss you, because you know this would be the last time you would let this happen. you whimper into his mouth and he lets a broken sob tumble on your lips where it stays as a reminder of this very moment, searing you both apart. you don’t kiss back.

“stop it, please. you’re hurting me.” it’s a whispered plea, but to sunghoon it’s a huge boulder that blocks his way from you. you’ve planted it there for once and for all, and he knows that there’s nothing he can do to make you move it.

“i’m sorry, i love you, but i don't want to anymore. i’m sorry.” 

sunghoon rests his forehead against yours, your tears mingled and continuous and he knows he’s lost you now, for well and for good.