#crying before my interview
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It's now literally exactly an hour before my interview, and of course the other job I interviewed for has just emailed me to tell me it's a no. Sure, why not universe, let's throw some more fuel on that 'this is going to go so fucking badly and I'm just going to be unemployed' fire
#crying before my interview#gonna be great#really gonna be in the right headspace#anxiety attack yay
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JJK OLYMPICS OHHH YOURE A GENIUS
head spinning w sooooooo many athlete aus rn…..
satoru honestly isn’t half as cocky as the media makes him out to be but he could be because you bring up world champion men’s freestyle swim times and it’s his name on the scoreboard ten times before someone else shows up. he’s faster than himself by fifteen seconds all around, he’s earned a bit of cockiness. mentioned in the last post that whenever he’s at a competition and he finishes a race, he looks at the camera and signs a little infinity sign and then blows a kiss to you. some bitter old coach always calls him out on it, and gets him fined for unsportsmanlike conduct, and he’s happy to pay the fees if it means getting a message home to you, but eventually you two come up with a new code; and at his next race, he places gold, turns to the camera, crosses his middle finger over his pointer finger and smiles. when he’s in his post-race interview, he makes sure to explain that he does it for you with the widest smile on his face.
megumi nepotism baby but not in the same sport. toji was a multi gold medalist back in his heyday for shooting, so it’s not really a surprise to anybody that megumi has scary good aim, but he takes to archery instead of shooting. actually the idea of megumi being an emo little kid and throwing rocks at a tree when his dad pissed him off his hilarious, and even funnier is toji watching him, slightly amused and a little scared because megumi is maybe six and hitting the exact same spot every single time. he grows to be very blase about it—it’s more of a release/hobby for him that he happens to be really good at, and well, now good enough to earn a few olympic medals. megumi is not a fan of having his dad ruffle his hair on international television after he’s won, but he supposes it can’t be helped.
i don’t know where to put yuuta…. tennis…. tempting….. him in his little white shorts…. little grunts after he serves…. cries….. a complete 180 in his personality when he’s playing vs doing anything else. so charming and sweet and kinda shy when he’s being interviewed, and the second he steps on the court his eyes are so cold it’s scary…. need him… extremely nerdy about his rackets, and shoes, and clothes, and rambles to you about aerodynamics and posture and torque whenever you ask him to teach you, and you always have to shutup him up with a kiss and remind him that yeah you sort of want to learn to play tennis for him, but mostly you came bc he looks hot doing it. once he got asked in an interview if he ever thinks about you while he’s playing and his response was very concise, “no, never. it would be a big distraction,” and did not realize the implications of his heavily televised words.
also…. not to make this post 40% yuuta but we could pull from canon a bit and make his sport fencing. he doesn’t excel because he’s the strongest, it’s because he’s learned to treat the sword as an extension of himself and a good strategist… also because i like the image of him pulling the helmet/mask off and shaking his hair out………..
don’t even know where to put yuuji…. volleyball? basketball? track and field??? the irony of him easily being the most athletic but canonically does not want to play sports 😭 but i can see him playing a sport because someone scouts him and it turns out to be a way to make steady money to support himself and his grandpa :( by the time he’s qualified and made it to the olympics, wasuke is doing much better (thanks to yuuji having landed some preemptive sponsorships and being able to afford better medical care), but not so well enough that he can travel across the world to watch yuuji play. wasuke tells you that you should travel and be with yuuji, but yuuji is so touched by the idea that you would stay with his grandpa and be by his side when he’s away :(( he wins gold, of course, and he doesn’t even wait until the closing ceremony—which, he’d mentioned in all of his interviews, so nobody can be too upset. he’s on record saying, “i’m excited to play, but i’m even happier to be going home. my girlfriend and my grandpa are watching me and i miss them!” several times— he’s on the first flight home with flowers, and tears in his eyes. puts his gold medal on his grandpa’s neck as a thank you, and spends probably thirty minutes straight hugging you and kissing you and honestly don’t put it past him to propose now that he’s got nike ambassador money
nanami started judo as a way to relieve the stress of his overbearing job, and someone at the gym/training center notices he seems to be a natural despite being a beginner. he starts to draw a crowd, which annoys him at first because the point of judo was discipline and release from having to deal with too many people at his office job, but nanami supposes he can’t be too mad when you introduce yourself as a talent scout and offer him professional training. there’s irony in him accepting your offer, because it was definitely not based in professionalism at all… quitting his job as a salaryman to become a professional athlete in his mid-twenties was not on his bingo chart, but if it means he will have met you, then so be it. you’re with him all the way, through his training, competitions, world championships, qualifiers, all the way until he’s on the podium. you’re the first to congratulate him, but he interjects by telling you he’s quitting. you ask him why—he just won at the olympics for crying out loud, but nanami just shakes his head, puts down his flowers and his medal so his hands are free to hold your face and tell you, “it would be unethical to kiss my manager, so i am quitting.” (later, when everything is said and done, and you two are cuddling, you mention to him that he could just hire a new manager, and not quit his new career, to which he blushes because yeah… that’s probably more rational, but rational was not in his train of thought at the time)
#anonymous#nanami kento.......................................... god#also yuuji :((((( just a kid who wanted to do something nice for his grandpa I will CRY#immediate proposal when he gets home to you who does he think he is? yuuta?#speaking of yuuta he's like the best player his age and he's always asked to attend events or parties or whatever#and he's always like ah no thank you I am going home to my girlfriend#every fucking interview it's like yeah I love tennis but I love my girlfriend more for supporting and encouraging me#my girlfriend my girlfriend my girlfriend#one day he actually seems Excited to be doing his press conference and a journalist picks up on it to which yuuta happily raises his hand#and lets everyone know that he's now engaged. and very very grateful for his wife#he does the same shit a few years later like randomly during a press conference he's like#'I am kinda nervous. my baby didn't sleep well last night so I was up with him pretty late' and everyone's like BABY?#and yuutas like yeah! he's almost 14 months now do u wanna see him!#let me stop bringing kids into this bc w/ satoru and kento I could go on for hours....#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jujutsu kaisen smut#gojo x reader#gojo smut#yuuta x reader#yuuji x reader#megumi x reader#nanami kento x reader#once u asked megumi what he thinks about when he's practicing and he's so deadpan as he reloads and arrow#and right before he lets it go he's like 'ur ex boyfriend' and then hits the target dead in the center LMFAO#olympics au
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the way Iñaki looks at Oda, on the verge of tears almost all the interview
the way Oda's voice cracks a little bit at some point
the way Iñaki jumps at the opportunity to hug everyone he meets
the way Oda takes Iñaki's hands in his own in a show of sincerity
the hat
"I'm so grateful that you were born to be just like Luffy"
ARE YOU SERIOUS
#the way im BAWLING AT WORK#again! because of opla!#unbelievable#opla#one piece live action#i did not even thought ab the fact that i've never heard oda's voice before lmao#eiichiro oda#iñaki godoy#anyway that interview got me smiling giggling crying#all the good stuff#if you haven't watched it yet god what are you doing!!#go go go#one piece#luffy#luffy!!!!!!#it reminded me of my interactions with my grandpa tbh#got me emotional
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Bombed my interview today. Gave the worst possible answers to the questions, stuttered my way through the easy ones, all around a failure. On the upside, we didn't click and I don't think I'm a good fit for the role, so all I lost was ten minutes and my dignity, and I gained some experience.
#then I called my dad and workshopped better answers to the questions everyone will ask#namely: why did I leave one job and spend a year and a half at a different job before coming back to the first one?#(yeah I gave an incredibly stupid answer. I know better.)#and the good news! I didn't cry!#onward we go#praying this next job interview goes better
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1 hour
#im soooooooooooo anxious .what if the killer appears#i've never been in an interview before and this isn't that but it's basically that. it's like halfway that#i'm going to crumpel#i'm going to look him in the eye and just start crying and go PLEASE. that's it man that's all i got left in me after this morning#sorry gang i am soo . stressed. and so anxious. i'm going to blow up.#this is either gonna go really well or . not well. but . on my hands and knees. please. i need 1 good news#i am running on 2 poptarts right now that's all i've eaten today and yuo know i don't think that's helping matters much#ooughhhrhghhrhg. hghhrhhhhhhhhgg#RAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ok i'll be normal. I'm so normal. This will go so splendidly i'll never worry about anything#ever again because i know it will go well and good things. will happen.#👍oough#clamtalk
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"lestat has never done anything wrong" WHAT DO YOU MEAN 😭😭 WHAT DO YOU MEAN???
#looking at tiktok comments on iwtv posts was my mistake 💔#saw a comment saying that the end of s2 means that louis was the real villian all along#???? i'm crying.#like yes i do act towards louis how those kind of lestat fans act (have def said louis has done no wrong before)#but i do admit!! the point is that they all do bad shit!! they're monsters!! that's the point!!#lestat has DEFINITELY done wrong#iwtv#amc iwtv#amc interview with the vampire#interview with the vampire
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debated on doing a long sappy post ab how the maze runner has impacted me since i was 13 years old and i ended up breaking down writing it so,, yeah. no long sappy note.
but seriously, the maze runner truly saved my life and if that sounds dramatic it’s bc i am dramatic and if i hadn’t had tmr when i had it i prob wouldn’t be here. that’s how much this series means to me.
so,, happy 10th birthday to the maze runner movie, thank you for saving me.
#the maze runner#thank you wes ball we say in unison#i feel like a mother when her kid turns 10 fr#crying. sobbing. throwing up.#2019-2023 ari especially thanks you tmr 🫶🏼#from laying in the icu alone watching cast interviews to the night before my grandmas funeral watching tmr#won’t go into detail ab my mental health but newt was truly the character that made me feel seen#a rare sentimental talk from ari#ari speaks#ari talks
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i could write a whole essay on how tragic øde's childhood was, but for now i will just read really old interviews 😭
link (in norwegian)
#the last lines killed me#i am really obsessed with reading interviews and articles sorry 😭😭#finding and compiling these is my hobby atp#the idea of a whole nation caring this much about a 15 year old is so terrifying to me#especially someone who's naturally shy and introverted as well my god it's so depressing to think about#i'll stop talking before i start crying#ami talks#martin 🫶🫶#martin ødegaard#martin odegaard
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when my roommates put things back in the kitchen incorrectly it makes me frustrated and angry. apparently, did you know, this is not a thing all or most humans experience ? some people don't have an intense emotional reaction to things not being stacked in the optimal way, or pans not being put back in their "usual" spot. did you know this. did you.
#personal#I'm having an online interview on autism tomorrow and so I'm researching and reflecting more#not like this is ground breaking or anything but just. it's interesting to me that this typically doesn't elicit an emotion for people.#I've been crying a lot over autism videos#I haven't had a chance to process my diagnosis yet really and there's still so much for me to learn and accept about autism#like feeling shame and guilt bcs of disability has been a huge problem for me lately. not being able to accomplish what I want to.#and seeing videos of other autistic ppl who were really attached to the idea of who they would become when they got older#or identified a lot with who they were while masking#and now have to let go of those things. and figure out who they actually are and are capable of doing without burnout.#whoof man. its a lot. i still haven't let go of who i thought id be when i grew up. to the extent that said struggle is part of my identity.#it's just. I am autistic. several medical professionals familiar with autism saw me and went 'yeah you are autistic'.#I spent so long learning how to better cope with my depression.#and it turns out some of that advice is opposite to what you need if its autistic burnout instead#which im gonna assume i just kinda had both going on at various times#i just. im not sure what to do with my life.#but i guess first i have to make my life more baseline liveable and enjoyable before i start pondering that#change is hard. basically. thats what this was about.
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.
#just saw kenny's interview about the ep where he's crying and i need to kill tim minear with my own hands for this#before the ep i thought the reason all of them were so short about this on socmed was bc it was a fakeout but no it's bc they knew how#stupid and unnecessary it was#911 critical
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kinda crazy but…
im gay for you
:o no way i’m also gay for u <3
#also i’m fucking exhausted it was a long ass day of robot#i broke down crying for no reason in the middle of my last tech interview for drama#because i was so fucking stressed abt hosting the robotics comp this weekend and waiting on college decisions#and also two of my friends were like in the hospital at the time#one bc they hadn’t eaten in like a week because of an ed and we’re doing really badly#and the other because they had to get stitches bc of sh#but i couldn’t really explain alllll of that to my drama teacher#anyway#i did hear back from one of the schools tho!!!!! and i got in!!!!!!#but they didn’t give me as much money as i would have needed to commit there#so like i probably won’t end up going even tho i really loved the school and it’s kinda my top choice#and also the accepted students days all conflict and i ended up signing up for one that would mean id miss the end of district champs#for robotics if we qualify#which my hopes are vaguely high this year#but now i’m gonna have to miss part of it if we do ://///#and the other more competitive one i’m waiting on hearing from some time this weekend i’ve been checking the portal like every twenty minute#it’s really bad#anyway i’m gonna go take a shower and then go to sleep before i drive myself to another breakdown#idk why the tags of this ask was my place to say all of this but it sure was
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being moved to a different classroom for my last week while the head of the program pretends she's doing me a favor but she's really doing my supervisor a favor 🙃
#she said she wanted me not to feel bad and be in a bad situation#but im p sure she did it bc my supervisor was up in the office talking shit ant me again this morning#she was acting all nice but 🤨#she's not nice soooo#also she didn't even follow up when i mentioned safety concerns for the kids when she asked why i was leaving#and she didn't ask me to stay#she did seem sympathetic but idk my co teacher thinks it was a favor to our supervisor to keep her happy#bc thry still think she walks on water#im so worried for the kids but it should be less stressful in t2#also the teacher i swapped with today saw me two hours later and she was like: girl i get it 💀💀💀#lmao#so sad for the kids tho#but excited abt new opportunities#but i did want to have the time to say goodbye to the kids#its probably better to transition them this way bc they'll still see me a little bit the last week but not all day#and get used to me not always being there#so they won't care as much when i'm completely gone the week after 😭#but they were crying at thebgate between the playgrounds today and it was really hard#i was holding finn's hand over the gate 🥺#then we combined classes for the end of the day on the playground and that was like 10 minutes before i went home#so they got happy for a bit then broke down again when i said goodbye 😭#teddy was screaming at the door the whole time after i left 😭#i watched thru the classroom window while the other teachers were consoling them and it was so sad 💔#i've only had one cry when i went home before but this time it was half of them#bc they barely saw me all day then i left as soon as they thought i was going to stay#anyway#i have a job interview tomorrow and surgery#and maybe a second job interview#trying to focus on that rn#still glad i'm quitting but 💔
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I am so nervous I wan puuke!
#oh god I have not been this upset about the thought of not getting a job before#then again my dad said he's never heard me happier after an interview so probably that's why#I'm just#I think I'm gonna be a little crushed if this doesn't work out#I'm nervous I fucked up the writing test#I'm worried I said something stupid during the interview#I'm worried that when they asked me to pitch something I blew it#I just#I fucking miss being in a newsroom#like that was the only time when everything happening at once felt good. when I felt like knowing about everything going on didn't suck#I like being on top of things! I like when my friends ask me if something was good or if I heard about x and I know it!#and I like following things as they develop! like! even when they're bad it's relaxing to be able to be on top of things#and I miss talking to people about what they do and writing public interest stories#and I miss when Twitter was good and I could follow all the different accounts and catch new things#and like some of that I could do on my own if I wanted to start making gaming news videos for YouTube I could but like#it's not the same! it doesn't feel the same#I know this isn't like my only chance to be happy and I know that like#and most people would find what I enjoy about being in a newsroom weird?#(I'm not saying I like when bad things happen I'm saying that when bad things happen I like being at the front of it if that makes sense)#but the thought that I actually left an interview not just feeling good but actually happy? and energized? and excited?#and I might not get that job and have to go back to the slow grind of applying#makes me want to cry
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do you guys KNOW how frustrated this thing makes me. like it's literally from the regiment that jamie would most likely have been in AND the story lines up so well with the plot of the highlanders and I'm just. constantly itching to retcon the episode a little bit in my head and make this the standard
but no!! the serial kind of depends on the standard being prince charles' rather than nust a regimental standard!!!! and it kills me every single day
#second doctor#jacobite ramblings#the OTHER thing that kills me is the ring.#having been given to kirsty's father 'in the heat of battle'#because i've placed the maclarens at kinkell castle#which supposedly hosted charles after culloden when he was on the run#whether or not that story is true i like the association#and i would love to swap it around in the dr who universe to him having stayed there before the battle#& the ring being something he gave to kirsty as a thanks for hosting#(which was quite common there is a Lot of jewellery in various collections given to ladies who hosted him)#(and other objects as well)#(not gonna talk about them here but i do love talking about them)#so it would make so much sense!!!! for kirsty to have the ring!!!!#but again the episode kinda hinges on the ring being charles' personal ring rather than a gift#screaming crying clawing at the walls. why won't this 60s tv show for kids squish neatly into historical realism.#for the sake of clarity i am being overdramatic about this but also i am a little bit pretentious and it does make me chew through concrete#anyway this post brought to you by me going to nms yesterday#was i technically there for a job interview? yes.#did that stop me from visiting the jacobite displays to say hello to my favourite objects and do a little bit of blorbo research? no.#if anyone was at nms yesterday & saw a little gremlin in a waistcoat taking pictures of highland wool spinning implements that was me <3
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emotional support creatures
#taking these oddly weighty tiny beanbags to my interviews lmao i hope i wake up on time#til these critters are actually really fun to juggle!!! (<-has never juggled before)#maybe i’ll try juggling with more of ‘em after i get home post-horrors in the evening#i have 6 other dais so… hm. maybe i’ll try 3?#but maaaan. why did that one interview place reschedule to take place on the same day as another interview?#though. man. i misremembered the location of the rescheduled company#so now i have to wake up a whole hour earlier than i would’ve had to s o b s#at least my earlier incoherent rambling got rid of most of my stress so i think i wont cry mid-interview at least…#aaaaaa save me mochidaiiiiiiiiii#ok that’s enough first world problems for one night; time to read up on company 1 till i fall asleep byebyeeeeee
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*erases 1 and writes a 0 in its place* it's been 0 days since I have cried over an LA fire missing pet video
#its so hard looking at news about it. i didnt even realize how many people i follow that live in LA. not just mutuals but like artists and#people ive followed for years. and everyones posting pics of their apartments view outside of the fires. or their bags packed#or talking about bringing their animal to shelters because where theyre evacuating to they cant bring them.#i follow the dogist on ig and i was crying watching him interview rescue staff#one of my now former managers at my last job is from southern cali and has talked about having to evacuate before#she moved from south cali to south la where i ljve. la being state not city#but still has family there. its so scary.
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