#crazy this year as much as i want to buy every one
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Exorcizamus
Summary: Life on the road, hunting the things that went bump in the night was a lonely life, admittedly. But having Ruffilo by his side made it all a bit more bearable. They had set out as children, led only by Jolly, to hunt the thing that had killed his best friend, and nearly them as well. Noah couldn't do it without him, honestly. Ruffilo was the brains and he was the brawn in the whole operation.
Adeline was a small town girl. Working to live and living to work. Until she found herself being hunted by the very thing her dad had always told her was just pretend. When the brothers save her, her understanding of the world is flipped upside down.
CW/TW: all things paranormal, death, swearing, smut (updated as it is written to include specific warnings), talk of religion, horror, demons. As always, if I forget anything please don’t hesitate to let me know!
Adeline
FIVE YEARS AGO
Terror seized her in its grasp as ice formed on the windows, the room growing frighteningly cold in spite of the heat being on full blast. Frantic she looked around, watching her breath puff out in front of her. There was something there in the room with her. She couldn't see it, but she knew it was there.
For weeks she had been experiencing weird things happening around her. Ever since she picked up that antique wardrobe. Lights would flicker even when there was no reason for them to do that. Things would fall over or just fly across the room. One night she had come home from work and heard footsteps. Literal footsteps.
And then there was the voices. Oh, God. The voices drove her insane the most. Faint whispers of her name here and there. At first so quiet and so infrequent that she thought she was going crazy at first. Maybe it was lack of sleep. But then it grew more frequent. And then louder. So much so that at times it was like it was screaming at her.
"ADELINE!" The voice screeched, shattering the windows in the room.
White hot searing pain erupted behind her eyes and she fell to her knees, grasping the sides of her head. It felt like her brain was going to explode. The scream she let out was inhuman. It sounded like something was clawing its way out of her throat.
Whispers of her name echoed around her. The hair on the back of her neck stood on end as quiet settled in. Normally she would be grateful for this silence. This time, however, it felt sinister. Like it was tricking her. Tears fell from her eyes, staining the floor underneath her. She just wanted it to stop. She would do anything for it to stop. All she wanted was peace.
Then she heard it. A loud rumbling outside. A voice calling to her from upstairs. Her breathing grew shallow, unsteady. It was taunting her. What could it want from her? Desperate for relief she rose to her feet once more, letting them lead her to the bottom of the staircase.
The front door started rattling as something outside banged on it, calling her name. She looked back at the door, recognizing a voice she had only heard just that morning. One of the antiquers who had shown up, asking her all sorts of weird questions about the wardrobe. Something about how it was a special one and they were willing to buy it off of her right then. At this moment, she really wished she had let them take it from her.
"Adeline, baby. I need your help." Her mother's voice.
Deep down she knew that wasn't her mother calling to her from upstairs. Her mother had passed long ago, before she was even a year old. Dad had told her it was a house fire that took her. That he was lucky to get her out before the fire overwhelmed the entire house. But she couldn't stop herself as her feet moved, carrying her up the stairs in spite of everything in her screaming at her to run.
Dread festered in her stomach as she crept down the hall, her terror growing with every step she took. She knew she shouldn't be following the voice, yet she couldn't stop. Closer and closer until she stood just outside her bedroom door. A room she hadn't slept in in weeks because of this.
"Adeline. Help mommy, would you?"
Sweat trickled down her back. This was wrong. Why was she doing this? She needed to run, for fucks sake. Not walking into whatever trap this thing had set for her. Yet here she was, opening the door to her bedroom, freezing in terror at what she saw sitting on her bed.
They had burns covering a good 80-90% of their body. Burnt bald patches on their head. The eyes weren't human. Instead this bright yellow as it looked at her, their grin cracking the burnt places on their face, fresh blood trickling out. Sure, they sounded like her mom. But this wasn't her.
"You-You're not my mom," she sobbed, her voice raw from screaming. Why was she here? What had she done to deserve this?
Adeline was vaguely aware of the front door banging open, someone shouting her name. Of their own volition her feet carried her into her bedroom, her hands swinging the door shut. Vomit rose in her throat as the smell of burnt flesh mixed with sulfur engulfed her, the thing pretending to be her mother now standing in front of her. She wanted to scream. To cry. Beg for help or mercy, she didn't know.
"Took me decades to find you, Adeline. Your precious daddy kept you hidden well. But I always get what's mine."
Something she couldn't quite place her finger on took hold of her. It wasn't fear or terror. Something much stronger. Doom. It was impending doom. What did it mean that they always got what was theirs? Why her?
Soon all she could see was those yellow eyes, right in front of hers. Consuming her. Staring into those eyes was like being eaten from the inside out.
Thundering footsteps up the stairs. Shouting. Her heart seized in her chest, her lungs no longer working. No longer pulling in oxygen. Her vision turned fuzzy at the edges, moments before she heard someone shout a name as her vision went black.
Azazel.
Tags: @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @lacy1986 @concretejunglefm @ichoosetenderomens @dontwantthemoney @chey-h
#bad omens cult#noah sebastian#bad omens fanfiction#noah sebastian fanfiction#bad omens#angst#noah sebastian fic#noah sebastian angst#fluff#bad omens supernatural crossover#paranormal#horror#bad omens!au
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I can just imagine Belphie with a baby that will not sleep by any means and it drives him absolutely crazy. I think he would become so agitated all the time, along with battling his post-partum brain :( he’d def blame it on his alpha (whom would of course step in and try their very best to take care of their very sleepy mate and insomniac baby) .
Maybe Belphie would harbor some guilt as a parent ? He would be happy to get his sleep but I think he might feel a little inadequate as a parent if he sees his alpha working so hard to take care of both of them and he can’t get it together. Especially if he didn’t want a child in the first place, I think he’d struggle even more .
He... would go insane. It would be a nightmare of epic proportions.
Especially because the baby is not human, so the newborn phase is like... idk at least a few years long.
I think the stress, the sleep deprivation, the regret, the hormones, and the guilt stir into a horrible cocktail that leaves Belphie struggling a lot. He probably breaks down into tears, dissociates completely, or becomes angry multiple times a day.
The saving grace in this situation is that there are six uncles on hand at all times.
Lucifer is extremely taken with the baby and will take the baby in the evenings several times a week. He has a little rocking crib put by his bed which he rocks with his foot while he does paperwork.
Mammon gets on a bit better with toddlers and older, but he still adores his nibling deeply! He's not exactly a reliable babysitter to a newborn sometimes, but he has a surprising amount of patience with the little one. He walks around the house for hours at night sometimes, just rocking the baby until they fall asleep. He likes to talk out loud with them, and if you ever overhear him, you'll hear him promising to teach and protect them.
Levi is extremely out of his depth with a newborn, but in a midnight emergency, he's always awake. He will fetch whatever you need, heat up milk, or wash bedding. Sometimes that kind of help is a lifeline.
Satan feels strange at the way the family dynamics have changed, but he is a surprising baby whisperer. If the baby won't stop crying, you can hand them to Satan, and they'll fall asleep for a least two precious hours.
Asmo is definitely the kind of uncle that promises to babysit all the time but is actually easily overwhelmed by a baby. He won't take his nibling over night, no way, but his photoshoots for Devilgram take quite a bit of time, so you can sneak some sleep in while he's busy. Also, you and Belphie never have to buy any clothes, because Asmo has bought more than enough.
And Beel, of course, sweet Beel. He is entirely mystified by his new nibling, his twin's baby. He's in love in every way. He takes the baby all. the. time. He learns how to do everything he can to take care of his nibling, but he never forgets to look after his twin either. He makes sure Belphie is bathing, sleeping as much as he can, and eating enough.
With the uncles around, Belphie and his alpha get some moments to curl up together. They can barely stay awake but they both manage it just long enough to apologise for the snapping and irritable moods, to reassure each other that they haven't made a horrible mistake, and that they love each other.
And then they can fall asleep together and recuperate, while the pup is getting passed around each uncle and showered with love.
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mmm it is awful difficult to ‘try to not buy non essential things’ when it is both bandcamp friday and shortbox comics fair and father daughter records is having a cd sale..
#sigh there will be other bandcamp fridays#i will be buying some shortbox stuff towarss the middle or end of the month but i want to at least. wait until i get paid and not go too#crazy this year as much as i want to buy every one
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techno went with us to the con yesterday
#i didnt get much worth showing off unless you guys just wanna see it anyways#i got four things#keychain plushie a bug in a jar and some paws#love the bug lady. she sets up every year :D#and this year i have a job so i was not limited to simple resin molds like i was last time#still didnt go crazy bc i found an annual cicada and wanted that one more than the super fancy ones#finally have some motivation to fix my shelf...#i dont usually buy a whole lot at cons if you wanna see a haul go ask ark jhdfjh#chat
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things i think buddie would argue about after moving in together: buying organic, the tupperware cabinet, couch throw pillows, the coffee maker
#yes i will elaborate#yk bucks buying all organic and name brand. eddie only buys organic or name brand if buck or chris want it. otherwise its gonna be generic#like if chris wants cheezits then hes getting cheezits if buck wants organic fruit leather then buck is getting his organic fruit leather#but if eddie wants oreos hes getting twist and shouts or sandwich creme cookies or whatever generic brand is available#every grocery trip is like just grab organic lettuce eddie. it doesnt matter buck just cuz theres no dirt on it doesnt mean its not lettuce#and the tupperware cabinet at the diaz (buck changes his last name to diaz okay he told me himself) house is crazy#i just know bucks tupperware cabinet in the loft is organized like crazy prob has labels or something. have you seen his immaculate kitchen#eddies tupperware cabinet is based on vibes. he tries to keep it organized but chris keeps coming home with more for some reason and theyre#all different sizes and theres no good way to condense them so theyre all just kinda in there and the cabinet closes so thats good enough#and that cabinet is the bane of bucks existence bc eddie let him have free rein over organizing everything else in the kitchen except#the tupperware cabinet#seriously eddie why cant we just throw some of these away and make some room in here?#oh suddenly mr we need to buy organic sustainably grown toilet paper wants to throw plastic directly into a landfill? absolutely not buck#and about the throw pillows#i just know mr eddie diaz loves home goods hes prob a member of the finders club or something#that man is decorating for all holidays and changes the pillows every season (canon) and buck well. weve seen the loft its the bare minimum#eddie comes back from home goods with a new pillow set and buck is like. eddie. eddie we have a dozen pillows already why do we need more??#none of the old ones match the new painting.#the new painting?? what new painting???#the coffee maker is a constant battle#because buck has had a hildy coffee maker for years and when he tried to set it up at eddies eddie was like. no. get that out of my house#and bucks like your house?? i thought this was our house 😔😔😔#oh baby i didnt mean that ofc its our house everything of mine is also yours#so i can set up hildy in our house right?#no.#and so buck is always dramatic as hell whenever he makes a pot of coffee.#oh if only i could set the brew cycle to match our work schedule. oh imagine how much we could save on the electric bill if it could put#itself to sleep after brewing. eddie. eds. babe if we could brew coffee from our phones then we could cuddle longer in the mornings#buck no. that thing is not allowed in this house.#me thinks
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Mmmhh...
#(Basically rant on my last two posts)#I know I've said it before and sorry for coming off as annoying–#but I really wish we still had a central bsd blog on Tumblr like fy-bungoustraydogs or bsd-central or things of the kind.#I think now everyone rushes to post news first. And although there's merit to it in knowing news as soon as they happen‚#in the long run the death of this kind of central official content ***fan*** blogs is such a huge loss of fandom spaces‚#especially for the archiving purposes they solved. Especially today that T/witter and G/oogle have basically become unusable.#Literally. Literally. I've been doing official content archiving since I was 11#(because that's the very specific kind of mental illness I have)#and let me tell you that the quality of web search and especially reverse image search only got worse–#in a way that is very evident and noticeable. Which is crazy tbh and not how things should work.#If anyone would like to start a bsd-central kind of blog I'll be the first one to follow.#Actually if anyone actually wants to establish it feel free to contact me and I'll be more than happy to share the resources I have!!!!#It just needs to be something multi-modded for a series of reasons I won't get into right now#I just can't personally do it (not as main admin at least) because that would be modding my FIFTH active bsd blog–#and that's a little too much even for me.#On top of some ethical concerns I have regarding whether it'd be fair for me to mod a fandom central bsd blog–#when I feel like I can't genuinely share the same amount of love for the franchise other fans share#On top of. You know. Getting a degree eventually hopefully.#Then years after the blog has been solidly enstablished and aquired enough credibility it could even open a free donations found to invest–#in buying and scanning and releasing bsd content that hasn't been shared yet like the guidebooks or illustration books or everything else–#for everyone to see...#The dream. (Is realistically never going to happen) (Won't stop me from daydreaming about it every day)#((Still salty I couldn't afford the guidebooks only due to the shipment prices. I *would* have scanned and uploaded them.))#That was a long and idealistic rant. Kyotag out#Edit: *Modding my SIXTH bsd blog#Apparently I mod so many blogs I lost count of them
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it's honestly so infuriating how people act so defeatist when it comes to so many things in the world especially things that are systematic like... saying shit like "but it's been like this for years" yeah and does it make okay? OF COURSE NOT! you can identify the issue but you are gonna let it happen because why? there's no reason for you to let it happen especially if you know it's wrong you gotta stand tf up and do something about, talk about it and let other knows so action can be taken that's how things change!
#i've seen the phrase being used too many times for too much shit#like how like every now and then we discuss minors debuting in kpop#and someone goes 'but it has always been like this!' but it doesn't make it okay#and it's becoming worse in recent years so you recommend that#we don't call out companies for it?#also that skz fanbase being like 'but everyone in this industry is a zionist how are we gonna solve this'#and it sent me like YOU TAKE ACTION YOU DO SOMETHING??#it's a problem a huge one in fact so why should you still#stream music and buy merch when you know where those profits end up??#i'm so tired of this attitude towards so many things#you can point problems out but then you do nothing abt it#a lot of people underestimate the power they have consumers#and also the power of community at times too#it's like at the end of the day you don't wanna do anything abt it#bc it ends up compromising your comfort and that's the truth#it's how people don't wanna boycott brands they usually buy#it's crazy to me#i don't want people like this near me i am so serious#tris.txt
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i WILL have waist length hair by next year . no matter what
#im still angry she made me cut it in april#a trim would have been fine but she made the hairstylist cut so much#like I said 4 inches to her and then she was done but now she had to come and tell the poor lady to cut more#actually think the hairstylist was on my side bc it really did not look like she cut that much#it makes me so ANGRY like why does she feel entitled to control every part of my appearance#I literally don't even feel like a person anymore#saw this tiktok of a brown girl cutting her hair to her chin bc she was never allowed to cut it bc long hair is considered a sign of beauty#and like. that's kind of messed me up ngl. bc while I feel bad. at least her mother wanted her to be beautiful...#I can't even explain it but#I can't wear nice clothes (the last time I was allowed to buy clothes was 3 fucking years ago) I always have to wear my cousins old ones#even for sixth form I really thought id be allowed to buy some new shirts or trousers or anything but guess what. nothing#there is nothing in my school wardrobe that hasnt been worn by 3 people before#and like I can't style my hair differently than what I always do and im even judged for new outfit combinations#she never gets me hair stuff even though I have the least manageable hair in the fucking universe#and the only makeup im allowed to wear is what she gets me (tinted moisturiser that is actually awful)#and then I look at my cousin and I have honestly never felt worse#bc she literally goes out w a face full of makeup and she can get highlights in her hair and wear whatever she wants#its crazy. and I can never say anything about it#its so fucking embarrassing as well#I just have to act like I don't care abt these things#when we go to Azerbaijan for my cousins engagement im the only girl in the family who isn't wearing a dress#bc she just had to insist that 'oh Alisha doesn't REALLY want a dress' and I just looked at her like. what.#so now im wearing the ugliest trousers and weird smock type shirt imaginable god I feel sick thinking about it.#lmao I can't stop crying abt this literally the stupidest thing in the world to cry about#my ammi would never do this to me
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the fine and subtle art of arguing with old men
it was a good week for testing which meant it was a slow week for me. most of my job is fixing the machine when it goes down. if it doesn't go down, i don't have much to do.
fortunately neither did marc. in a site full of ornery old bastards, he's the oldest and the orneriest, so it goes without saying that i enjoy spending time with him. he reminds me of my grandpa. hell, he reminds me of a lot of people. i've befriended enough grumpy old men that i've got a sort of momentum to it now - you know how it is, when you meet someone that reminds you of someone else you really like. you get to start that friendship off half built, because you already have an idea of how to like that guy, and some of that old warmth can be brought to the new friendship. a little ember to start the stove up with.
(i think that's one of the really undersold beauties of getting older. you stop viewing people as strangers and more like remixes of friends.)
anyway, i was sitting next to marc and we were talking about the future. i've got my eye on having kids sometime soon (year or two? hopefully?), and he's very happy for me. i've tried asking him for advice, but all he says is that he didn't do a great job with his own kids and they still turned out okay, so i should stress less and trust myself more. i hope he's right. he believes it, at least, and it's a hell of a thing to have the faith of an old man. his faith is hard won.
as for his plans, he's retiring at some point in the next six months, and is hoping to sell his home and buy something in florida. he's republican, so he views the state as paradise, and i'm not inclined to even try talking him out of it. it's his dream, you know? i know for a fact my paradise would be a lot of people's hell. life's funny like that.
still, we kept going on, and it was a good time, and then he reminisced about the last time he got close to quitting - back around 2020. our job required getting vaxxed, and he refused, and there was a big kerfuffle about it before the job actually backed down. i know there's not a lot of sympathy for the unvaxxed out here, but the man's 62. you get the shot when you're under 30 to protect the people around you, but when you're over 60, you're just getting it to protect yourself and it's hard to be mad at someone for kicking their own ass.
still gave me pause though. i knew he wasn't going to take it well, but half the job of collecting curmudgeons is keeping them around, so i said
hey. i'm sorry they bent your arm over it, but.
but.
you should really get that shot.
and he looked over at me, and i looked at him, and he actually spat. not on me, just the concrete, but it was enough to show that he was mad. then he walked away, as abrupt as anything.
i felt bad about it. i wasn't sure what i'd expected, when he was willing to lose his job over it before, but i'd been so invested in his dream of retirement - the idea of him sipping margaritias on a beach next to his wife, the wife he calls every day during lunch, the wife he says is the one thing in life he ever got right on the first try. the wife that almost divorced him back when he was in the airforce because he just wasn't home enough.
(but he can be home now.)
and then he mentioned the vax thing, and it was like seeing a pin hit a balloon. he works out every day and takes all sorts of crazy vitamins and is generally committed to getting the most out of his pension and his life. i didn't want this dumb weak point to be his achilles heel.
---
i wasn't actually sure how long marc would be mad at me. i've seen him stay mad at some people for weeks. i wasn't sure if being friends would make that time go up or down.
it went down. i'm glad it went down.
he stopped being mad about two days later. we were doing front end maintenance one morning, and it was just that simple mechanical rhythm - hex key, replace the anode sheets, punch some off-gassing holes, oil it up, put it back in - that put things at ease. it always does. people working there are too busy to remember grudges, and it has this sort of mandatory practical communication that helps smooth things over. it was going great, and then out of the blue he said babs, you gotta be careful giving advice. those shots come with complications. what would you do if i got that shot, had a stroke, and died?
and i don't know what answer he was expecting, but i just told him the truth, which is that i would be devastated. i'd feel like i killed him. i thought that was a pretty normal response, but he looked taken aback. he asked why i said it then, and i said i'd have felt the same if he died of covid. that's just life. sometimes, there's no way forward that doesn't risk some kind of regret.
we finished the tube after that, in a silence that felt heavier than peace but lighter than anger. it felt like the ball was back in marc's court. like it would be rude to take that turn from him.
we parted ways with a nod and didn't speak until the next day.
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i was doing spreadsheet work when he found me again. standard paper engineering - thinking of things we might need and ordering them in batches, months ahead of time. it always feels a little like plugging holes in a dam with my fingers.
but he popped up, and we didn't even exchange pleasantries. he just said i'm gonna die one day, and you can't blame yourself for that.
which is a hell of a thing to just tell someone right off the bat.
so i said what
and he said babs, i am in my 60s. something is gonna get me eventually, and whether it's covid or heart disease, or a stroke, there will be something you could have said or done before. and that's okay. it's not your job to make me live forever.
and you know, he actually made a lot of sense. so i said
okay.
i'll keep your business yours. i just
you were talking about your retirement before this. and i want that for you very much. you've worked hard for 45 years, and you deserve a break. we're getting to sick season, and it would be the saddest fucking thing in the world if you got this close to winning the race then tripped in the last ten feet.
and we sat there a few moments longer. i wasn't sure what to say, and i wasn't sure what he'd say, but eventually he just shrugged and said
yeah
then he left. i figured that would be the end of it.
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i did front end maintenance yesterday, after being gone a week. it's one of my favorite things to do. i like working with my hands. i really like working with my hands. i'm glad i went to college, but in a different life, i think i could've made a better electrician than an electrical engineer.
and at one step, when we were both hoisting the plate back onto the machine, his sleeve rode up, and i saw two bandaids on his arm.
we finished the install, and i was ready to go back when marc actually stopped me.
i got the shot, he said, almost embarrassed. like he'd been caught. and i knew he was gonna say something dumb about it, so i just cut him off by giving him a hug.
i was relieved. hugging old men is kind of like picking up cats. if they like you a lot, they'll tolerate it, but that's about it. we sat there maybe three beats before his hands went up, and then he gave me one overly-hard thump on the back. in my experience, this is how old men tell you that they're done, so i let him go.
carla talked me into it, he said, almost defensive. his wife. his one good decision.
tell her i said thanks, i said back.
trump got the shot too, he said, less defensive, but oddly pleading. like he was consoling himself.
like he was nervous.
then it's gotta be safe, i said, and he looked up at me, strangely searching, strangely vulnerable. i don't know exactly what he was looking for, but i guess he found it because after a few moments his shoulders relaxed.
yeah, he said, one hand on the back of his head.
it's gotta be.
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Just took a gift to a friend and not only did he seem to really like it he ALSO followed the brand’s instagram I WIN
#ramblings#my only true joy in life is giving ppl gifts that they truly enjoy#because I think it’s a big thing like ‘hey deep down I know you well!!! I know I’m not great at showing friendship all the time!#but I put time and effort into the thought of what this gift should be!!!!’#every gift I give is one that I have put thought into#even if it’s little#I swear!#the funny thing is I don’t love getting gifts that much because I buy what I want LOL#(but I will admit I have gotten some absolutely lovely gifts)#like I have a Jackie Daytona magnet that makes me giggle with glee every time I see it#and I have a little painting by a two year old (I think she was two?) of my cat that makes me smile#I think deep down it comes from the fact that I had to be SUPER critical with gifts for my sister and mom because those mofos are so picky#and some friends who bought me some fantastic shiny rocks! (dice) and D20 stuff ahhhh#(I have some friends who have gotten me some VERY KIND GIFTS and I feel bad because I never know what to get them#they got a lovely crockpot for their wedding but that was four years ago Jfc#like this is a crazy person thing but I have not given gifts because I didn’t think they were good enough for the friend#a thing I keep jewlery in was originally going to be for a friend but I didn’t think it was good enough so I just used it myself#I truly know that’s insane but I don’t want to give bad gifts#anyways. many thoughts. I buy things because I like to buy things for friends
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every single day. every. single. day. i'm haunted by that one iconic tumblr post about kevin's perfect match being some random person he meets at the grocery store who doesn't know a thing about exy. (I'm pretty sure that's the gist of the post it's so old and i can never find it)
like i'm never not thinking about it.
sooooo
imagine a kevin day in his late 20's ???? he doesn't ever go shopping. can't remember the last time he did but he's restless before a big game. he's craving a healthy protein filled snack. it's like 1am. he goes to the 24 hour grocery store. he's got his hood up. if anyone catches him here he'll be swarmed. his pr managers will have his head. he's reaching for his snack. someone speaks up behind him. says something like "the peanut butter ones are the best ones" kevin, with an eye roll and a scoff ready to fall from his lips, turns to the stranger. then he pauses. he's cute. curly hair. glasses. a sweater vest. he notices kevin's tattoo. says "nice tattoo" kevin freezes. oh no, here it comes. then the stranger drops a random historical fact about chess. he's baffled. he's pretty sure he said the exact same thing when he was sitting in the chair at the tattoo parlor half drunk all those years ago. but he takes too long to respond. so the stranger smiles awkwardly and says "see you around" and leaves. kevin can't stop thinking about him. may or may not make one too many midnight trips to the grocery store. he finally see's him again. this time he drops a historical fact on the guy about the veggies he's buying. he laughs. kevin short circuits at the sound. then the man is giving him his number. he doesn't text for days. afraid he's a crazy psycho fan. but then he see's him again. the man looks a little embarrassed when he apologises for being so forward. he's walking away when kevin says "you don't know who i am?" the man looks totally baffled. "should i?" he says back. now kevin is the one baffled. so kevin texts him. they talk about history. kevin doesn't talk about exy. turns out the stranger is a history teacher. kevin is enamoured. but the man still doesn't know who he is. kevin strangely wants to keep it that way. but the little bubble bursts eventually. the kids at the man's school are talking about exy. he's heard of it of course, but isn't a sports guy, so never paid attention. then kevin's name is dropped. and then history teacher is googling kevin. and it's him. it's grocery store kevin. his kevin. he goes a little ghost. he doesn't wanna date a professional famous world star athlete. takes him a couple days but kevin catches on. texts him saying "you figured it out..." they don't talk. they see each other at the grocery store again weeks later. they sit outside in the parking lot at night. history teacher asks him about exy. he doesn't know much or anything. kevin goes off on one. history teacher likes how passionate he is. takes a chance. they keep talking. history teacher listens to kevin talk about exy. kevin listens to him talk about history. they go on secret museum dates. kevin takes the man running even tho he hates it. the man falls in love. kevin falls in love. kevin wakes up one day, and he is finally happy in love.
#as much as i love every kevin x aftg character ship#this will always be my favourite#kevin day#all for the game#aftg#the sunshine court#tsc
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A Nonsense Christmas || NSFW
Synopsis: Due to a terrible snowstorm, you were forced to skip out on your yearly family gathering. However, your Christmas gets better when a certain blonde slips through your chimney to give you, your naughty presents.
Pairings: Felix × fem!reader, includes rest of Skz, Julie of Kiof, Ni-ki of Enhypen
Warnings: SMUT MINORS DNI, p in v sex, use of vibrator, fingering, hair pulling, brief squirting, missionary, loss of virginity, virgin!reader, unprotected sex (not for you), praise, degradation, overstimulation, swearing, dirty talk, mention of alcohol
A/N: FELIX NAVIDAD FELIX NAVIDAD YEAHHHH. Fun fact, this is my second Felix fic. And also my entry to @stayblrofficial's Holiday Writing Event! Anyway, a late Merry Christmas to everyone and I hope next year is as splendid as this one was. As always, enjoy!
Word count: 6.8k
Song Rec: Juno by Sabrina Carpenter (preferably her live stages)
Stockings on the wall, peppermint tea, a giant tree with baubles, snowmen, hot chocolate, presents and Santa Claus.
And maybe Mariah Carey too.
Those were the things that made your Christmas, a true Christmas.
Ever since you were old enough to remember, you knew your family was crazy about Christmas. Each year, without fail you’d be dragged off to buy new stockings, a ginormous tree, hot chocolate bombs, gifts for relatives and numerous Christmas events organised by some or the other watchkeeping society. You distinctly remember the smell of warm milk and your mother’s home baked cookies wafting into your room on Christmas Eve. You also remember the feeling of a slap on the hand when you and your brother tried to steal some cookies, only to be chided and locked in your rooms until the morning, lest you sneak out and ‘find’ Santa Claus.
But of course, being the amazing child you were, you learnt from an early age that the fat man who rode a sleigh pulled by reindeers and carried a sack full of presents was nothing but an old wives tale. Laughter still erupted from within you whenever you’d recall the time you told your younger brother, Riki about it, making him sob for an hour–though he immediately shut up when you bribed him with a stolen cookie.
Christmas with your family was always the happiest day of the year, no matter what complicated adult shit was going on in your life. Pending taxes and doctor’s appointments that you’d missed? Screw that, you were going home to waste an hour a day for three days playing League with your brother on your parents’ 16 inch flat screen TV.
Even the idea of boarding the plane to your hometown always made you kick your feet up in the air. All the planning, the buying of gifts (along with the hours of waiting in line at the stores), the baking—practically everything Christmas related filled your soul with joy and hope.
But this year was different.
This year brought along with it, a snowstorm—which wouldn't die out until the January of next year.
That is how the meticulously planned flights and schedules that you had arranged in your calendar all went into the trash bin, as you had to listen to your parents wail about how they’d miss their most beloved child so much at the Christmas party they were having. All as your brother watched on with betrayal in his eyes from the background.
Though you tried to soothe their nerves by saying how you’d have just as much fun this year as you did every year, deep inside, you were sobbing non-stop. Everytime you remembered the fact that you wont get to sleep in your childhood bedroom this year, you cried into your pillow, eventually drifting off to sleep from the exhaustion.
In a lousy attempt to cheer yourself up, you accompanied your colleague Julie to a Christmas tree hunt for her house. You had even taken your brown trench coat and deerstalker hat out—a Christmas gift from your parents. While Julie was off bargaining with her crocodile tears, you snooped around the tinier trees—meant for those people who either wanted to spend their Christmas alone, or just didn't want a massive and expensive tree.
And when your eyes landed on one that was sitting all alone, just waiting for the right person to take it home, you knew in your heart that you just had to be that right person.
Some more crocodile tears and a few transactions later, you were suddenly standing in front of your fireplace with a tiny tree decorated with even tinier baubles. The tree reached up to your waist, and though it wasn't as big as the one your parents had, it still warmed your heart enough to get out of your momentary depression and get onto the road to Christmas cheer. So what if you couldn't be with your family? You were big enough to enjoy festivals on your own now.
And so began your quest to celebrate Christmas exactly as you did each year—albeit without your family. You’d have to omit some of the family games and (unfortunately) the tradition of smacking Riki's head into a pie, but apart from that, you were determined to prepare a Christmas Eve feast fit for one and do everything that you'd do if you were home.
Who knows?
Maybe you’d even stay up for Santa.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The living room was warm, cozy and overall looked straight out of a Christmas movie. After some hard hours of snooping out your basement, you stumbled upon some Christmas-sy decorations, which in reality were from last year's Halloween.
But hey, decor is decor, and your house finally looked like something which was not the Grinch's house. With mistletoe hanging from every corner, along with your tiny tree and a cracking fire, you plopped down on your couch, and let out a sigh. The dinner you made was devoured within fifteen minutes, and you were surprised by how great your plum-pudding turned out. Maybe Christmas would be great this year as well.
Alas though.
All that mistletoe and no one to kiss it under.
All wrapped up in work ever since you graduated, you never really thought about relationships and all that jazz. Under the weight of your parents’ protests for grandchildren, you’d gone on a few dates here and there. But gradually, you started to lose interest and so did your parents. Their interest turned to your brother, whose misery you enjoyed in a sadistic sibling way.
And anyways, who needs boyfriends and mistresses when you’ve got something better?
Fanfiction!
Sitting on the couch, you lazily scrolled across your Tumblr home-page. A gleam tore through your eyes as the sight of all the Christmas fics. Your fingers soon started aching from all the tiny hearts that appeared at the end of every other fic that popped up, with their customised banners and flamboyant titles. Most of them were your general Christmas morning fun stories, but the ones that particularly caught your egregiously horny eyes were the ones where the ‘warnings’ paragraphs stood the tallest.
Unsurprisingly most of them were named after Sabrina Carpenter and Chappell Roan songs. But then again, who’d skip the opportunity to name a fic about filthy positions and a short part about bondage, ‘After Midnight’?
After meticulously crafting a well curated library of fics (ranging from sugary sweet to the one about the 69), you glanced up at your clock.
10:03
You had recently been enjoying going to bed as soon as the hands of the clock hit nine pm. Yes, it was a ridiculously early bedtime for someone whose teenage years were filled with promises of staying up till 2 in the morning when you grow up, but if adulthood had taught you anything, it's that 'early to bed, early to rise' was actually a pretty good proverb to live by. Were you getting old? Perhaps.
Still not old enough to stay up for Santa though, you thought, laying your phone down on the coffee table and settling comfortably onto the couch. You curled up like a cat, and faced the warm fire, crackling in front of you.
Your eyes wandered up to the Christmas list that you had created on a whim, when you got drunk with Julie earlier that day. There were only two things on the list.
A glittery blue vibrator, and for someone to fuck you into the next year.
A bit much to wish for some old man in a red suit to bring all of those things to you in a sack, but hey it never hurts to hope. And plus, you were horny and all those cunningulus fics were not helping.
With a stomach threatening to burst if you eat one more cookie, and a body that was just plain exhausted, you snapped your eyes shut and drifted off to a much deserved sleep.
It will be a happy Christmas tomorrow.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"And what about that big bunch of fertilizer for that farmer from Norway?” Seungmin anxiously tapped his foot as he scanned his eyes again and again over a list attached to his clipboard. He looked like he hadn't slept in days, and his friends Jeongin, Hyunjin and Changbin were staring at him with concern in their eyes.
“Seung, you should think about taking a nap for a while.” Chan strode into the room with a huge box stuffed with toys in his arms, “Everything will be fine.” He added on seeing Seungmin’s horrified expression.
“It's okay Seungmin, I can just knock you out.” Minho sauntered into the room, wearing a red leather jacket and a huge smile—which turned into a frown when Chan glared at him.
“I just don’t understand how we’re supposed to do all of this without Santa.” Seungmin sighed, collapsing into a chair, “I knew we should have started everything months ago.”
“People wouldn't have even started to make their Christmas wishes by then.” Hyunjin said in a soothing voice, in an attempt to calm his friend’s nerves. Seungmin only sank further into the chair, with a disappointed expression on his face.
“I would.” A cheerful voice said from the corner, which turned out to be Jisung, who was dressed from head to toe in red and gold, looking like a Christmas prince in all his majesty. Jeongin rolled his eyes and looked at the empty armchair next to him. He looked up at Chan.
“Where’s Lix?” He asked, alarmed by the fact that the person who had practically been glued to him all morning was now nowhere to be seen. Chan shrugged, but then Changbin responded.
“I think I saw him checking out stuff in the pink section earlier.” Changbin’s ears turned faintly red when he said this. And it wasn't due to the freezing cold.
The ‘pink section’ was a notorious part of Santa’s workshop. In short, it contained the more ‘adult’ wishes—which were made by single, lonely people or by people who hadn't tasted genitalia in years. Santa was said to have established that section at the demand of his wife, but even Jeongin—the history buff—didn't know the exact reason why. Either way, it was a section, whose contents none of the boys liked handling. Each year they would draw their lots to decide what section each would handle. This year Chan was in charge of the toys and Seumgin was in charge of gardening material.
And the pink section? It went to none other than—
“Lix!” Jisung exclaimed, at the sight of the blonde haired man standing at the door, “Close the door will you? The heater’s on.”
“I noticed.” Felix said in his rich and captivating voice, that could charm almost anyone. Felix flung his arms up and stretched like a cat, the sound of his stiff bones cracking could be heard, as he sat on the empty armchair next to Jeongin with the widest smile on his face.
“Why so joyous, Lix?” Minho asked, a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. Felix turned to him.
“It's my first time doing the pink section.” He said rather proudly. A few strands of hair settled in front of his face, framing it beautifully and surrounding him with a magnificent, peacock-like aura.
“You need any pointers?” Chan said, to which Minho laughed raucously.
“Christopher Banhg, our resident playboy.” He said in between fits of laughter. Changbin joined in the teasing, whilst Chan’s entire face slowly started to turn red.
“How many times have you chosen the pink section again?” Changbin asked, “Oh right, seven times.” He answered his own question before Chan could even open his mouth, “I bet you know everything there is to know about it.”
“Oh shut up.” Chan said, his eyes still stuck to the floor, before he turned them to Felix, ‘As I was saying, do you want tips, Felix?”
Before Jisung could say ‘that’s what she said’ Felix spoke, “Nope, I am well prepared for tonight!” His eyes formed crescent moons as he smiled brightly, “I’m particularly excited for this one request though.”
“Oooohhh.” Hyunjin grinned mischievously, “I bet it's a pretty one.” Felix nodded, to which the entire room burst out into laughter.
“Watch out, Chan, he’s coming for your playboy title.” Jisung chuckled, “What’s the wish then?”
“Well, she wants the usual—” Felix took out a post-it note from his pocket and began reading, “A glittery blue vibrator, and the interesting part—” He smirked deviously, whilst raising a brow, “for someone to fuck her into the next year.”
A collective 'oooh' rang around the room as the boys glanced at each other with teasing eyes, and then at Felix. Those kind of requests were usually rare, and at most, all of the boys (excluding the oldest playboy) had fucked about three people, in all of their career.
“I’m weirdly excited.” Felix affirmed, putting the list back in his pocket, and looking past Jeongin’s shoulder at the giant window. Outside, on the beautiful canvas of the starry night, snowflakes fell without any cease in their seemingly perpetual motion. As Minho and Hyunjin had been complaining for a week, this year’s winter was harsher than any before. And they meant it quite literally, as they lived at The North Pole.
“Best of luck Lix.” Changbin gave him a bright smile before standing up, alarming Jeongin, who had his legs resting over Changbin’s thighs.
“Not that you’ll need it though.” Minho said through a barely stifled yawn, “Oh well, I’m off to groom my reindeers. Come along, Innie.” Jeongin grudgingly got up and followed Minho and Changbin out of the room. Hyunjin and Jisung soon followed, after stealing pieces of plum cake from Chan and after Seungmin left—with Chan following carefully behind him—Felix sighed and slumped deeper into the chair.
Reaching into his inner jacket pocket—the secret one he had painstakingly stitched—he pulled out a picture that looked like it was taken on a Polaroid camera.
It was a picture of a woman, dressed in a brown trench coat and a ridiculous deerstalker hat. She was pretty damn hot, Felix had to admit, with a posture so straight that he wondered if she was a princess.
“Fucked into the next year, huh?” He chuckled to himself, putting the picture back into his pocket and running a hand through his hair.
He couldn't wait to get to your house.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As a child, you had always imagined Santa to be a bit slimmer than the pictures in which he was depicted, reasoning that he wouldn't be able to fit through chimneys if he was that big. Though your parents were quick to laugh at your opinion, they also didn't want to tell their mere child of a daughter that Santa wasn't real. So they encouraged your extremely controversial opinion.
And you held that opinion quite proudly. None of the other kids in your class had ever thought about that, and regarded you as the class’ genius. Because of this, to this day you still expected Santa (if he did exist) to be the kind of dude you saw on advertisements for gyms.
What you did not expect Santa to be was a 5’8-ish, ridiculously gorgeous blonde guy, dressed in a red suit that fit him beautifully, holding a sack tied with a red ribbon. He stared at you. You stared back.
This was not how you were expecting your Christmas to go like.
Not with a robbery.
“Who the fuck are you.” You said, cautiously picking up a pillow. You tried to run your mind back to all those childhood self-defence classes. Although—judging by this guy’s muscles—they weren't going to be of much use.
“Relax, Miss Y/N.” The man said in a voice as beautiful as his face, “I’m not gonna hurt you.” By the faint light of the crackling fire behind him, you could spot tiny freckles painted across his cheekbones, “I’m here to deliver your Christmas presents.”
What. The. Actual. Fuck.
“You do realise you sound crazy right now?” You said, gripping the pillow a bit tighter, “Listen dude, if you’re here to rob me, I have nothing in my—”
“As I said,” The man kept speaking in the same eloquent manner, “I’m here to deliver your presents.” He preemptively flung his sack to the ground, and bent down on one knee, unravelling the ribbon and opening it up. He reached inside and pulled out a box, setting it on the table in front of him and closing his sack again. Then he looked up at you.
“I’m sorry, but could you please turn the lights on?” He said, “I can’t see that well in the dark.”
This younger Aussie version of Santa can't see well in the dark? You thought as you turned a lamp on. As much as this was the most unbelievable scenario ever, something in the back of your brain told you everything that was happening was real and you were certainly not high right now.
“Um…excuse me?” You began lamely, the blonde looked up at you, “What’s your name?”
“Oh pardon me. I forgot to introduce myself.” He laughed and got up, extending a hand, “I’m Felix. And I'm here to deliver your presents from the North Pole!” He motioned towards the meticulously wrapped present lying next to your tiny tree. Your eyes wandered from the ground up to the note stuck on top of the fireplace.
A glittery blue vibrator, and for someone to fuck you into the next year.
“Uh…” You said, unsure of what else to say. You took another look at the man—Felix. He certainly was handsome, you thought—perhaps not exactly your type but definitely good-looking enough. His long hair fell over his wide shoulders, and you could see the way his suit was tightly fit over his biceps. Your stomach flipped over.
This guy was extremely hot.
And you were extremely horny.
“When you say presents—” You began, slowly sitting down on the couch, “—do you mean that there’s an actual vibrator in there?”
Felix nodded and sat down next to you, running a sharp tongue over his lips. His soft, pink lips. Was it just you or was the fire way too warm right now?
Your life was nothing short of interesting. As a child, you had gotten into multiple ...activities that always seemed to have a surprise at every turn. But this?
This was on top of the list of weird things that have ever happened to you.
“Would you like to open the presents?” Felix snapped you out of your thoughts and you raised your head abruptly to look at him. Your eyes locked onto his and you audibly gasped.
He had eyes as black as coal, stunningly beautiful, with the comfort of a warm fire glowing behind them. They made you want to dive into them and swim around for a while.
“You’re so pretty.” You whispered, not comprehending what you said until a second later, “I mean–” You internally slapped yourself, “—I’m sorry that’s not I meant I just—”
“It’s alright doll.” Felix cut you off, “I think you’re pretty too.” His voice again; it felt like a glass of whiskey after a long day. Doll, he called you.
“Oh..” You trailed off, feeling warmth creep up to your cheeks, “Thank you.” You mumbled, looking down at the presents once more, “Should I open them now? Or wait till tomorrow? I don't wanna be ‘a naughty girl’ or anything.”
“Don't worry about that.” Felix leaned forward to rest his hands on his thighs, “You’re already on the naughty list, sweetheart.”
You gulped down the saliva accumulating in your mouth, and rushed to pick the box up. Your hands shook as you pulled the satin ribbon. The walls of the box collapsed to reveal a long, blue machine, covered from head to toe in glitter. You looked up at Felix.
“You really are the weirdly younger version of Santa huh?” You said in a shaky voice. Felix smiled—he seemed to shine when he did so.
“I’m an assistant.” He said, shifting closer to you, his eyes wavered down to your lips, “There are eight of us in total, and we go around the world each year to give out presents to children and adults alike.” He looked at the vibrator and smirked, “No matter how naughty they’ve been.”
The queasy feeling rose in your stomach once more. As hard as you tried to avert it, your gaze went to his lips again and again.
“But, I’ve caught you haven't I?” You said in a soft voice, “W-Won't you be punished or something?” Felix smiled again and shifted dangerously close this time.
“That was the plan, sweetheart.” His voice was as deep as the rumbling of the earth, “You see, I only delivered one of your precious presents.” He smirked again and his hand came up to caress your cheek, you didn't pry it off, “You still have another wish don't you?” He leaned forward and whispered, “To be fucked into next year?”
His warm breath against your neck made you shiver, you could feel his knee pushing to open your legs. Normally, this would be an abnormal situation. But it was Felix and you wanted him to do to you what the characters in your fics did to each other.
"Felix…" You sighed, tensing up as he nudged his nose into the crook of your neck. His lips soon followed, attaching to your skin and leaving warm, wet kisses. They really were as soft as they looked.
"Shush now." He mumbled, absorbed into pressing kisses down your neck, "How about I take care of you tonight, hm?"
You stayed silent. How could you tell him that you've never actually…done it?
“Felix I-” You took in a shaky breath, “I’ve never…done this before.” Felix looked up at you with widened eyes and blinked. Then he smiled gently.
“That’s alright, doll.” Doll, again, “I’ll be gentle, if you want me to.” He slipped his hand off your thigh and extended it to you, glancing at the stairs to your bedroom, “Shall we?”
Taking his hand was the best decision you had made all year.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Felix’s lips are almost unfairly soft against your own as his hands rush to undress you, pushing your t-shirt up your waist and pulling down your shorts to the middle of your thighs. Pressing his forehead against yours, Felix pulls away ever so slightly, “Tell me if you want me to stop, alright?”
Nodding, you can’t help but be curious about his plan. You find yourself questioning every fic you’ve read in the past. Or maybe they’ve never had Felix’s tongue shoved into their throats.
Felix lazily drags your panties down your legs, flinging them across the room before slipping a hand below your legs and picking you up, placing you gently onto the bed. Romantic, you thought.
He placed a kiss to your forehead before he started to strip himself, your gaze raked over his body as you waited on the bed, biting your lip in anticipation. Once he was matching you in nakedness, he crawled up to your position on the mattress, starting to lavish attention to your body once again.
“Hey there, pretty.” Your cunt clenches around nothing at his words, earning a chuckle from Felix. Admittedly, you’d never felt so dizzy at the prospect of having a man go down on you—he just looks so pretty, with his freckles and his hair and his everything.
Dropping his head between your knees, he groaned at the sight, and bit his lip to contain himself. You wanted to cover yourself but when your legs moved even a tiny bit to hide, he spread them wider and the cool breezes from around the room slapped across your feverish cunt.
The feeling was already so pleasurable, and you didn’t know if it was the afternoon glass of rum making you feel this way or just Felix, either way you knew you were incredibly turned on.
“Have you ever touched yourself down here?” The way he said it, as if you were all innocent, he narrowed his eyes when you nodded yes, “Hold on.” Felix reached across and grabbed the box you had set on the bedside table. Your present.
"Used a vibrator before, sweetheart?" He asked gently, smiling when you shook your head, "That's alright, I can show you how." His voice deepened as he said the last words and you widened your eyes.
Adorable, Felix thought, as he handed you the vibrator. Albeit being momentarily confused, you nudged it onto your labia—like how the fics described.
There you were, bathed in soft moonlight, laying on your mattress naked, legs spread, and steadying the vibrator on your clit. Felix smirked to himself as he studied the way your thighs quivered when he placed his hand on top of yours
"May I, pretty?" Felix cooed, reaching for your pink vibrator. You handed it to him, laying back obediently and waiting for his ethereal touch. His freckles seemed to glow like stars in the moonlight—his face a magnificent galaxy.
And when he rested the vibrator onto your clit, you let out a relieved sigh in response, breathing out softly, lifting your hips up and grinding up against the vibrator in his grip.
"Good girl. Just lay back and relax for me," he softly directed you, his bare words were enough to send you to the edge of Heaven.
"Oh, Felix," You glanced down at his smirk and how his eyes were fixed on the way you were clenching around nothing. He loved the way your slick folds glistened in the soft lighting, and the way your breasts started to subtly bounce as you started to violently shake.
"How about we turn up the speed hm?" He mumbled, eyes lighting up when you nodded yes, unable to speak due to your current predicament. He was making you feel good—better than your fingers ever could. And better—you assumed—than any other man could.
The vibrations of the toy increased, making your legs shake as you tried to ground yourself from the intense pleasure that you wondered if you could take any more of.
That was when Felix held you by your waist and started to target a specific spot, somewhere you could never reach with your own fingers. The feeling of him hitting your g-spot with such precision and the vibrator doing its job on your throbbing clit, made you squirm, trying to get away from the intensity of it all, but his firm hand on your shaking thigh kept you in place.
With a loud muffled moan you squirted, unable to warn him—you were too unfamiliar with the feeling of such intense pleasure that it got you overwhelmed, too overwhelmed to even speak. The blonde let out a breathy chuckle when he saw the mess you were making, but didn’t stop nevertheless.
Your lips were fixed in an o shape, your cheeks were pink, and your brows were pinched together. You shut your eyes and threw your head back as Felix's name slipped through your slew of whimpers.
“Felix! Oh fuckk—” Your moan came straight from within your chest—a noise you didn’t even know you could make, “Felix I-” But you couldn’t finish your sentence, thanks to the almost painful feeling growing at the base of your belly.
“Shh sweetheart, it’s alright.” Felix’s voice was soothing and warm, “It’s alright, I’m here darling.” You gulped softly when Felix gripped your hip with one hand and led the buzzing vibrator deeper into your sensitive pussy. The tip of the glittery blue machine slid up and down your slit, making you whine and push back against his hand.
“Oh goddd—fuck fuck fuck!” You very nearly yell, still trying to wriggle away up until the very last second like the tide going out before the tsunami comes. When you do cum, your demeanor instantly changes—you get heavy and clingy and whiny as you rock back and forth through your orgasm.
You never really understood the full feeling of an orgasm, settling on it being the feeling you got when your fingers got tired of rubbing your folds. But the feeling of Felix’s face being inches from you, his eyes beautifully darkened and his hand working against your sex, you realised this was what all the fics described. A feeling like an earthquake erupting from within you.
You were right on the verge of greatness again, slowly nearing a climactic ending, when your eyes fluttered open, and you saw Felix sitting up on his knees, holding the vibrator far from your throbbing pussy. He was staring down hungrily at your thighs, a look lingered behind his eyes—a dangerous one.
Without warning, he took his middle finger and started teasing your folds with it, the vibrator now disposed on the side. Your eyes widened as he sunk his finger into your drooling cunt. For a moment, you thought about the probability of this being a glorious dream. But when his long, veiny finger pushed all the way in, a long, satisfied sigh escaped from your parted lips and you did not want this dream to end.
Your folds glistened in the dim moonlight, the obvious need evident in your tone when Felix plunged another finger inside your tight heat. "Fu—ck," you moaned softly, your breathing a lot more ragged now that he was moving his digit in and out of you, slipping his fingers in knuckle-deep and smirking at how you seemed to suck in his fingers. God how pretty you looked, with your shaking body covered in sweat—you glistened like diamonds in the light.
"Someone’s eager," Felix chuckled. The pads of his fingers started to circle your sensitive bundle of nerves, eliciting slightly louder moans from you.
“You want me to stop, baby?” Felix’s brows furrowed worriedly at the sight of your ragged breathing. You shook your head at him and placed your hand at the back of his head, gripping his hair. Felix moaned loudly.
"Fuck sweetheart," he grinned at you as he added his ring finger, and you could feel the cold metal of his ring on the warm flesh of your thighs as he pumped them back and forth into your heat, “Fuck—keep-keep doing that…that’s right..” His voice was a bit deeper, betraying his arousal. Who knew Santa’s assistant had such a filthy kink?
Felix’s hair was feather-soft against your shaking hand, as you brought your right hand up as well to feel it. Your grip on his hair only motivated him more, as the sounds of your pussy squelching as it sucked up his fingers, filled the room. His middle finger worked immaculately against your cunt, a place you could have never reached with your fingers alone.
Felix looked magnificent as he admired your body—the crook of your neck, the soft skin of your thighs, the way your eyes rolled back—he was relishing every single thing about you. Wild, primal thoughts flanked each neuron of his mind. Felix could feel your cold breath hit his lips gently, like a cool wind moving a river.
“Shit—can I kiss you, sweetheart?” He asked cautiously, his fingers tensing inside of you when you nodded. You felt his lips press against yours, the sweet feeling of pressing candy to your mouth came to you. You could taste slight notes of rum and cranberry on his tongue—an intoxicating flavour.
He pulled away briefly, his face was still close, and he pressed his forehead against yours, breathing heavily. Your hand pulled his hair once more and he groaned deeply, his cock twitching between his legs.
Fuck, you were so gorgeous. A faux memory played out in Felix’s mind, he wanted you all to himself—in sickness and in health, till death do you part. The way your lips parted and the melodic way you said his name, he never knew his name was such an elysian thing, till he heard it from your lips.
His hot lips moved away from yours and down to your neck, kissing and gently biting the delicate skin. You let out a gasp and arched your neck, it felt so divine that you didn’t even notice that his fingers were out of your pussy and placed on your hip.
Your breasts moved into Felix’s face as you arched your back at his teeth digging into your skin like a savage animal and Felix audibly whined. His hand came up to play with your boobs, his fingers fiddling with delicate skin. His painfully hard cock grew even harder, as he wanted nothing more but to fuck the sanity out of you.
“Baby,” he breathed, and he meant to say a lot more than that, but it’s the best he could manage when he was this overstimulated, “Sweetheart, don’t you want my cock?,” he whispered again, wrapping his arms around you in an effort to ground you.
“Lix…” You whine, you could see his rock-hard length between his legs, “Lix—need your cock–please please pleeasee…” Felix was undone by you—the way you writhed underneath him, the way your voice shook, the way you’re so totally and completely overwhelmed—he could feel it and he loved it.
“Alright… alright, doll.” He chuckled, gripping your hips in order to align himself with you. He was big–huge even–it made you a bit nervous. You knew from your non-virgin friends that–at most, it was only 4 or 5 inches, without all that ego. You didn’t have a ruler but you knew that Felix was much more than 5 inches.
What a way to lose your virginity.
“Ah-ahhh fuck!” You nearly screamed as he entered you, Felix didn’t like teasing–and by God were you thankful for that.
“You like that baby?” Felix grunted, his voice was oh so deep–as was his length, “Yeah, you like being stretched out huh?” His right hand was underneath you now, squeezing your buttcheek like his own personal stress toy, “Naughty, naughty girl—ah godddd” Felix was a moaning, whimpering mess, the sound of you making him feel lightheaded as he pounded into you, “Should have known you were a dirty girl when I saw that list–oh fuck, keep squeezing me like that—that’s a good girl…” Your slick walls were clenching around him like a vice, and he knew he was done for.
You could only moan in response, reeling in the way his cock stretched out your walls, the sting being nothing compared to the bliss you felt as he relentlessly fucked you.
"so fucking pretty, taking me like this, so so pretty" Felix continued, rambling.
"mphm, Felix, you're so big!" You moaned, thinking nothing of it as you spoke, his size being the only thing in your mind at that moment. His thumb strokes against yours, trying to distract you from the pressure, pressing your forehead with kisses, singing you soft praises.
"You're so tight," he whispered, relishing in the way you clenched around him while it started to adjust itself. The pain was killing you, but at the same time–you wanted more.
No, wanted wasn't the right word.
You needed more.
“You’re almost all the way in ,darling” Felix whispers, almost as if he heard your thoughts. His breathing is growing heavier by the second, and he’s forcing himself to hold back from just thrusting the remainder of his cock in. He knew it was your first time—those adorable eyes, that filthy mouth of yours begging him for more—but he resisted, lest he hurt you.
“Oh Felix fuckkkk..” Your eyes opened to look at him. He was beautiful, an angel in his own right, moon-like eyes and a face full of constellations. No wonder, you couldn't stop yourself from falling into him.
Your mind is gradually turning more hazy with Felix’s cock taking up the majority of your thoughts, on top of his scent that’s been creeping into your olfactory senses. The more Felix inched his cock into you, the more he pressed onto your g-spot, and the more it started to make you see stars whenever you blinked. You grew so sensitive that you felt every throb Felix’s cock is giving you.
“It’s too much,” you slur, dizzy as you try to adjust to the feeling. “Please Lix...” You don’t know what you’re asking for. Maybe relief from the sensation that he can’t offer you. Maybe more.
"Good girl. You're taking me so well." he praised you softly while he delivered a few harder thrusts, "Can't believe this is your first dick," Soon, there was no pain at all, only pleasure.
Your eyes rolled back briefly as Felix hit that spot deep within you, the one that made sparks dance behind your eyes, the one that made you moan from your chest.
You felt your pussy expanding around him as he started rocking his hips back and forth, hitting that same spot again. You held your breath for a moment, still adjusting to the size difference, and when you exhaled, a few stifled sounds came through. It hurt so good.
He grabbed you by your waist, steadying himself while he started to speed up, getting caught up in how good your virgin hole felt wrapped around him. Felix watched as he pumped back and forth, fixating on the way you coated his length in your arousal.
You couldn't help but groan at the change in tempo, head craning back into the pillow, your mouth slung wide open.
“Felix oh god!!” You whined, your walls were so sensitive, “Fuck, you’re so hot..” You had no idea what words were coming out from your mouth, “Ahh—ahhh fucking hell—I love you!” You wouldn't even remember saying those words until the next day. Felix’s eyes visibly softened at you.
"Say it again for me, darling?" He slowed his pace, but increased his temperament, his hips slapping against yours with a sting as he thrust in and out of you, slow and hard.
“I–ah shit!” You gasped, his scent was your oxygen, “I love you..”
“I love you too, baby.” Felix leaned forward to kiss you. Your lips danced passionately, even as your bodies stayed connected to each other. His lips felt like first snow and soft ice cream, you wanted to devour and be devoured by him.
“Look at you, you sweet little thing...” He teased as he grinded his cockhead into your sweet spot, slowly sliding in and out just to feel your wetness coat his dick. It’s pure nirvana for him, warm and wet and perfect, a place he could bury himself inside.
His words sent a shiver down your spine, a mix of anticipation and frustration building within you. You clenched your fists, digging your nails into the mattress, as Felix continued to move at a pace that was maddeningly fast.
“Going dumb on my dick aren't you baby?” he groans as his hips slap into yours, bruising your walls and using you, his cock is throbbing inside you, balls twitching and voice falling more breathy and desperate—so close to filling your pretty little pussy up.
"Cum with me, baby, cum all over my cock like a good girl." Felix said through gritted teeth, his tone somehow still soft and caring despite his pace.
“Oh god…Felix!” You moaned, “fuck fuck fuck need your c-cum please—oh my god.” Every muscle felt like fire. You’re caught up in how everything feels, too distracted to care about the noises spilling out of your mouth. All you know is this feels good – it feels passionate.
As if on command, his last, hard thrust sent you over the edge, and with a cry of his name, you released sticky juices all over his length, the squelching sound of him fucking you through your toe curling orgasm making him reel.
With another cry of release, you shattered again and again it seemed, your body arching as waves of pleasure crashed over you. Felix held you tightly, his fingers digging into your side as you trembled in his arms.
He was seconds behind, filling you up with his cum, fucking it into you as he stuttered above you, pressing his weight further down as he gripped and tugged at any skin of yours he could reach.
“That’s it, that’s it baby.” He worked you through your toe-curling orgasm, "That's it my love, you’re doing so good for me.”
Your breathless moans filled the room as he stilled inside you, letting his cum soak into your walls and his length, unable to bring himself to pull out. His hand came to your hair as he rested his head against yours, trying to catch his breath with fluttery eyes. You leaned into his touch, humming at his soft caress.
“Good girl,” Felix murmurs, being careful in the way he pulls out slowly from your well-used hole. You shudder, and Felix feels the way your entire body tenses, and he fights his way out of the brain fog to rub your back with the skimming tips of his fingers. “Shh. You’re okay. Relax, darling.”
Your chests heaved with exertion. In spite of his softening cock, Felix couldn’t help the feral, almost animalistic, feeling when he saw the sight of your mixed release trickling out of your pussy.
“Ahh shit.” He mumbles, rolling over to collapse next to you. Felix feels something touching the sole of his foot, and when he looks down, he chuckles, making you look at him.
“What happened?” You ask drowsily, your eyes on the verge of falling asleep.
“It’s nothing, sweetheart.” Felix assures you, pushing the cum-soaked vibrator at the bottom of the bed onto the floor, “Are you alright, baby?”
“That–” You breathe in deeply and smile with your eyes still closed, “—was the best Christmas present I’ve ever received.”
“I’m glad, sweetheart.” Felix smiles, pulling you safely into his arms, as you drifted off to sleep.
Felix sighed and melted into your warmth. He had to leave in a few hours to deliver all the other gifts, but a few more minutes wouldn't hurt and so he stayed.
After all, he’d be coming back on New Years as well.
With a much better present.
Thank you for reading, dear reader! Hope you have a great day ❤❤
#StayblrHolidayEvent#lee felix#lee felix smut#lee felix x reader#felix#skz felix#stray kids felix#felix x reader#lee felix yongbok#skz smut#skz imagines#stray kids x reader#skz x reader#stray kids x you#stray kids smut#skz hard thoughts#skz hard hours#stray kids hard thoughts#stray kids hard hours#felix hard thoughts#felix hard hours#lee felix hard thoughts#lee felix hard hours#felix smut#lee felix yongbok smut#lee yongbok hard hours#lee yongbok hard thoughts#lee yongbok smut#felix skz#stray kids
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Kiss My Ass | Kevin Magnussen x Mercedes! Reader
Summary: On track, Kevin is your fiercest adversary. Off track, he likes to have you at his mercy (and in his heart).
Warnings: 18+ after the cut. Female oral. P in V. Unprotected sex. Female reader
Requested: Yes and no. People wanted a part 2 and I wanted to give it to them! You can read this as a standalone but part 1 - Suck My Balls - adds to the fun!
F1 Masterlist
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f1 just posted
liked by lifeofsteiner, pierregasly and others
f1 kevin magnussen receives a one-race ban. magnussen will miss the azerbaijan gp as he reaches 12 penalty points in a 12 month period
3,323 comments
yn_ln ha ha
→ user she’s so messy
→ user can you blame her? he made contact with her again, which is why he got a penalty point liked by yn_ln
haasf1team we warned him this would happen
user kevin looks so good in that photo though. his arms 🤤
→ yn_ln are we looking at the same photo?
georgerussell63 @/mercedesamgf1 she’s being problematic online again
→ mercedesamgf1 she’s just had a pr meeting. we’re not allowed to give one again for another week
→ yn_ln @/georgerussell63 snitch
olliebearman sorry, kevin, but it will be nice to be back on track again
→ yn_ln and we will be delighted to have YOU
user love how yn is acting like this is the best news she’s had all year
→ yn_ln even better than my contract renewal
mercedesamgf1 we apologise but we have taken yn’s social media off her until baku. thank you for your understanding liked by kevinmagnussen
yn_ln just posted
liked by kevinmagnussen, maxverstappen1 and others
yn_ln how was everybody’s sunday? oh, mine? thank you for asking. mine was splendid
10,204 comments
user see what happens when kevin isn’t around liked by yn_ln
mercedesamgf1 we’re running out of pr presentations to show you (but we’ll let you off because you’re a RACE WINNER)
→ georgerussell63 i’ll make some
→ yn_ln i don’t like you very much sometimes
→ georgerussell63 and comments like that will be in the presentation
→ yn_ln why can’t you just say congratulations like a normal person
alex_albon that’s my girl! stunt on these hoes
→ yn_ln my only supporter on the grid
alexandrasaintmleux that’s my girl 🥳 so happy for you
→ charles_leclerc mon coeur, no. we’re sad. she overtook me
→ yn_ln stay sad (i’ll buy you a shot later)
user not kevin liking this. they’re so messy
→ user they’re actually the best duo on the grid. every race i look forward to the memes they’ll create together
landonorris i did it first
→ yn_ln why does nobody just say congratulations anymore. i won a race!
→ maxverstappen1 what? like it’s hard
→ landonorris seems like it has been recently
→ yn_ln and they say i’m problematic
user she’s such a good driver when kevin isn’t deliberately trying to crash into her
→ yn_ln thank you. everyone else calls me crazy
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mercedesamgf1 just posted
liked by georgerussell63, danielricciardo and others
mercedesamgf1 mixed emotions in the garage after singapore. well done george on the points but a disappointing end for yn once more
3,620 comments
yn_ln why don’t you just rub salt in the wound further, admin. thank you. thank you very much
→ georgerussell63 points points points
→ georgerussell63 why have i just had notification from hr that you made a formal complaint about me?
→ yn_ln you know why
user i swear he has it out for her at this point
user i acc fear our girl over these next 6 races. kevin has no penalty points and no seat next year
user how to tell kevin is back on track
user it’s giving school boy crush. pull her hair to get her to notice you
→ user they just race each other hard. they’re both stubborn and yn gives as good as she gets. they both turned into each other
haasf1team oops?
→ yn_ln you and your driver are on my list
→ landonorris don’t worry. it doesn’t take up much time. i’ve been on it since 2019
yn_ln @/georgerussell63 stop liking posts about my dnf’s this season. i keep getting notifs
18+ !!!!
Goosebumps rippled across your bare back as his breath tickled your shoulders. He sucked a spot under your shoulder blade, watching as the skin reddened. The material of his shirt caressed your skin as he trailed kisses down your spine.
“You’ve got too many clothes on,” you chastised, rolling your shoulders back when his beard tickled your lower back. He pressed a kiss to the two divots there, pressing his thumbs in them after and marvelling at how well they fit. Like you were made for him.
“Patience, lille kriger.” Kevin whispered against your skin. His hands reached for your hips, pulling your bottom half higher. “What was it you said after your Baku win? Kevin Magnussen can…”
“...kiss my ass,” you panted, body tense in anticipation. The sheets rustled as he shuffled down the bed. His lips pressed against your left buttock before a sharp sensation zapped up your spine. You wriggled away from him, rewarding his antics with the sight of your cheeks jiggling.
“Did you just bite me?”
His hands wrapped around your ankles, yanking you back down towards him. The suddenness of the movement had your arms collapsing beneath you; your body and face landing on the mattress with a bounce.
“I didn’t say you could leave.” He took a moment to admire the reddening bite mark on your cheek. “You do have a spectacular arse.”
You turned your head to look at him but he had already ducked between your thighs. Your breath hitched when he pressed a kiss to your inner thigh. His cool breath hit your wetness when he laughed at you. His beard tickled your thighs when you attempted to close them around his head. His hands forced them apart.
“Behave yourself,” he warned.
“Or what?” You said, aiming for bravado. Unfortunately, the breathy tone in which it was said ruined that.
“Or I won’t do this.”
His tongue pressed against your slit, lapping at the wetness pooled between your thighs. He flattened his tongue, dragging it up towards your sensitive bud. A strangled gasp tore from your mouth at the unexpected contact. Kevin traced circles on your clit, suckling gently and taking pride in the way you bucked against him. Your hands twisted into the sheets, fighting to stop the moans from spilling out of you. Refusing to concede to him, to let him know how much he was affecting you.
“Come on, min skat. Let me hear you,” he grumbled against you, tongue dipping between your folds as he feasted. Your thighs burned from where his beard rubbed against them.
Kevin sank a finger inside your heat. You writhed against the sheets, breath coming out in pants but refused to make a noise. Spurred by your silence, the Haas driver added another finger, curling them in the way he knew you liked. Your back arched off the bed, a curse leaving your lips. Kevin didn’t boast about his victory, just continued to ravage you like a man starved. If there was one thing that could erase the sting of a DNF, it was the way you cried his name as you approached the edge. Teetering on the precipice, your eyes snapped open when cold air hit you. His eyes twinkled as he sucked his fingers clean, aware of what he had denied you.
“You robbed me of a podium. Again. And now you’re denying me an orgasm.”
A cheeky grin took over his face as he clambered off the bed, taking in the sight before him. You lay completely bare, ready for him to take as he pleased. Turning on your back, you propped yourself up on your elbows. A small pout formed on your bruised and swollen lips.
“Take it off,” you demanded.
“As you wish.”
In one quick movement, Kevin whipped his t-shirt off, dropping it on the pile of your clothes at his feet. Your eyes roamed the broad expanse of his chest, lingering on his tattoo and trailing down to the strained fabric of his jeans.
“And those.”
“You’re bossy when you’re waiting to be satisfied.”
“You’ve not proven you can satisfy me yet.”
His eyes narrowed at you, even as his hands moved towards his belt. You arched your brow, feigning a picture of boredom. The rapid rise and fall of your naked chest gave away just how eager you were to watch him fully disrobe. Once he was bare, you shuffled to the end of the bed and pushed up onto your knees. Your arms wound around his neck, pressing your lips to his. You nibbled on his bottom lip, revelling in the moan he let out when your tongue brushed against his.
You managed to spin the two of you, pushing him down so that he was seated on the edge of the bed. Climbing into his lap, you connected your lips again, trailing down to the underside of his jaw. Sinking down on him, both of you moaned at the feeling of your slick walls enveloping him. His hands came up to grasp your hips but he didn’t move you, allowing you to adjust to his size. Your eyes fluttered shut before your hips began to rock back and forth.
“For a man so inadequate on track,” you started, voice husky. “you don’t do a bad job between the sheets.”
Before he could reply, you raised your hips before dropping back down on him abruptly. The air was knocked out of him and a strangled grunt spilled past his lips when you repeated the harsh action.
“Fuck.” His grip on you tightened, fingers digging in. “You turned into me. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you wanted my attention.”
He sucked in a harsh breath when your nails dug into him. Your pace never faltered. Your breasts bounced as you rode him. Kevin leaned forward, taking one in his mouth. His tongue flicked across your nipple.
“You talk a lot of shit for a man who’s never won a race.”
A yelp tore from you when his teeth clamped down around your nipple, and the rhythm of your hips stuttered.
“Almost there. Come on. Just a little longer for me, love.” Kevin begged.
Your hips stilled immediately, denying yourself the pleasure you’d been chasing. It was worth it for the look on Kevin’s face.
“What did you say earlier about me not being that good?”
Humour replaced the confusion on his face as he realised that you were punishing him for his harsh words during the post-race interviews. Triumph was written across your face and he couldn't wait to wipe it off. He pulled you to his chest, arms tight around your back and flipped the pair of you. You bounced slightly, head landing on the plush pillow. Gripping both your wrists in his hand, he pinned your arms above your head. You looked up at him with wide eyes, struggling against his hold.
“Feel this?” Kevin whispered, pressing himself against your thigh. “You know just how good you are.”
With his free hand, he guided himself in you, inch by inch. He didn’t allow you to adjust to the new position before thrusting into you, slow and deep. An intimate pace to contrast your previously frantic one. He lifted your leg, bringing it to rest above his hip, allowing him to hit that spot deep inside you. You cried out, hands sliding into Kevin’s hair and pulling him close. He allowed himself to fall against you, pressing you into the mattress.
“This okay?”
”Yeah.”
His head fell to the crook of your neck, beard tickling your skin. Whispers filled the space between you.
”Good girl. You’re taking me so well.”
He continued his slow pace, each thrust hitting deep inside you. Your stomach bulged from the thickness of him bruising your walls.
“Look how beautiful you are wrapped around me.”
Soft moans and sighs filled his ear, the melody of your pleasure. A loud groan tore from Kevin’s throat when he felt you clench around him.
“You gonna cum for me, sweetheart?”
He picked up his pace slightly, hand reaching up to palm your breast. His thumb brushed over your nipple as you barrelled towards your end. Your back arched off the bed, breasts brushing his bare chest as you came with a cry of his name. The feeling of your warmth hugging him tight pushed Kevin over the edge. With one harsh thrust, his teeth sank into your shoulder as he spilled himself inside you.
~
Head resting on his chest, you listened as his heart rate doubled in pace. His arms tightened around you, pulling you closer into his side as if he feared you would run from him. Even if your legs weren’t shaking, you’re not sure you’d want to.
“I told you we’d do this again.” Kevin murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.
“I don’t know why you sound so proud of that.”
“Maybe I like doing this with you.”
“Yes, well I like winning races but we can’t all get what we want.” There was no bite to your comment, only friendly teasing.
Kevin’s fingers traced patterns along your thigh, relaxing your body. Your eyes drifted closed, a soft hum coming from you. He sensed your sleepiness, wondering if approaching the topic in your content state would be easier.
“Would you still do this with me if you weren’t angry at me?”
“Huh?”
“This started as hate sex, right? But, what if there wasn’t any hate in it. I don’t mean to run you off the track. You just seem to be there when things go wrong.”
“So it’s my fault?”
“No, no, no. That’s not what I meant. I mean, you are distracting but… I want to spend time with you. Outside of this room. Outside of the track.”
Silence filled the room. His heart pounded so hard in his chest that you had to move away; the sound echoing in your head. At your movement, his arms went slack around you, preparing himself for the rejection.
“I’m still mad at you…” you started, feeling bad when his face fell, “…but, I’ll let you take me out for breakfast and we’ll see how it goes.”
The only response you had was a blinding smile, your back being pressed into the mattress once more.
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kevinmagnussen just posted
liked by hulkhulkenberg, charles_leclerc and others
kevinmagnussen jeg elsker dig (yes, we get along when we’re away from the paddock)
7,884 comments
yn_ln i love you too (but we only get along when you’re kissing my ass, not talking shit)
yn_ln yes, ladies, the rumours are true. so just remember those arms belong to me now when you’re thirsting about them online. i see you
→ user oh god. she’s turned the energy she reserves for hating on k mag onto us
→ yn_ln no, he still gets it as well
alexandrasaintmleux okay but these are quite cute
georgerussell63 crikey. i’m not sure the two of you pairing up is a good idea
→ yn_ln jiminy crickets! i’m not sure you commenting on my life all the time is a good idea
→ georgerussell63 you still mad about the powerpoint?
→ kevinmagnussen she’s complained about it twice in the past hour
landonorris did you let kevin stand in front so that he would look taller?
→ kevinmagnussen new target acquired
→ landonorris shit
→ haasf1team kevin, no
mercedesamgf1 i think the pr team might’ve liked a heads up
→ kevinmagnussen i was told she wasn’t talking to them
hulkhulkenberg finally. i was getting fed up of hearing you talk about her
→ kevinmagnussen shut up, mate
→ alex_albon she talked about him too
→ yn_ln alex!
→ alex_albon i’m sorry but i’ve been waiting for you to admit this for months. i’m just happy that you’re happy
user i knew that the pic in her spanish gp dump was kevin!
(Bonus)
haasf1team just posted
liked by yn_ln, hulkhulkenberg and others
haasf1team cooling off 🧊
5,879 comments
yn_ln be right back. making this my lock screen
yn_ln take this down. i can’t have other people catching onto what i’ve known all along!
user is he looking at hulk or yn in that first pic?
→ haasf1team yn. they shared
→ hulkhulkenberg i was kicked out
→ yn_ln i told merc to let you use mine!
→ user can’t be an ice bath when they’re both in there 🥵
user i don’t blame yn actually. i’d let him ram me off the track if he looked like that
→ yn_ln didn’t really have a choice in the matter, love
user kevin magnussen. i was not familiar with you in that way
→ yn_ln now make yourself unfamiliar
user yn wasn’t joking when she threatened us on kevin’s relationship post
→ user girly is fighting these comments so fast
→ yn_ln back, i tell you 🤺 back
kevinmagnussen @/mercedesamgf1 she escaped again
→ mercedesamgf1 thank you. we’ll be revoking her social media rights again
→ yn_ln but you’re still a traitor
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Requests open
Tag list
Only includes those who requested a Part 2 as I don't know who is comfortable with consuming this content
@steamy-smokey @1800-love-me @suckerforoldermen @dying-inside-but-its-classy
#formula 1#f1#formula 1 smau#f1 smau#formula 1 social media au#f1 social media au#formula one social media au#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 drabble#formula 1 fluff#formula 1 x reader#formula one imagine#formula one fluff#formula one x reader#f1 imagine#f1 drabble#f1 one shot#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#kevin magnussen#kevin magnussen imagine#kevin magnussen drabble#kevin magnussen one shot#kevin magnussen fluff#kevin magnussen smau#kevin magnussen x reader#formula 1 smut#f1 smut#formula one smut#kevin magnussen smut
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Good luck, babe.
Writer!Agatha Harkness x reader
Summary: Twelve years later, a package is sent to your home, the latest book from your ex secret lover. The gesture turns your whole life upside down, a harsh wave of your old feelings and memories dragging you towards her again.
Warnings: +18, angst, internal homophobia, mentions of Steve, Agatha and reader are both in their thirties, smut, finger and oral sex, reader receiving, praise kink, soft sex.
Word Count: 6.1k
A/N: I absolutely loved writing this one and I may have dropped a tear or two, I hope you enjoy it as much as I did<3 sorry if there are any mistakes, English is not my language.
Tag list: @whoreforolderfictionalwomen @yamysunmoon thank you loves <3
Masterlist
“I love my life”
You kept repeating that sentence over and over again, standing before the bathroom mirror, hands resting on the sink, head hung low. Trying to ease your shaky breath, trying to stop the tears that threaded to spill from your closed lids.
“I love my life, I love my life, I love my life”
With a deep breath you looked up to your reflection, your face reflecting anything but exhaustion and sadness, your mascara ruined from the tears that escaped.
“I fucking love my life”
And you did… right? You had to.
You had everything you have ever wanted, everything you dreamt of when you were a kid. A good and stable job, a beautiful home to enjoy and take care of and… you had a husband. A perfect, nice, handsome husband.
Then why the fuck did you feel this way? So empty, like you were falling down a pit of darkness, like you had this hollow hole in your heart, every day getting bigger, keeping you from doing normal life things. You had to pull every strength from you just to get up from bed in the morning and go to work. You been feeling like this for years now, but lately… after seeing her on the news again…
Seeing her on tv, being interviewed for her new book, one that you had at home, hidden in the closet, ready to be read. One that she sent you directly with a personal autograph for some fucking sick reason.
No, no, this wasn’t because of her, it couldn’t be, it’s been… what? Twelve years? This was not because of her, no way.
You stared at your left hand, slightly shaking, you inspected your wedding ring, your beautiful, shiny, wedding ring, it should bring you joy, make you feel free, happy. But it only made you nauseous, feeling like you were tied down for life.
Only if you… could… slowly you brought your right hand to the ring, pulling it up from your finger, your mind screaming at you, telling you what a terrible idea this was, your breath hitched, suddenly feeling lighter when it fully came off, like all your burden disappeared in that moment. You wiggled your fingers little bit, bringing your hand up in front of the mirror, you could see the tan mark from the metal, you haven’t taken it off in the whole ten years you’ve been married, and it felt… good.
You felt fucking good without it.
“No” you whispered, shaking those thoughts from your head and deciding to put the ring back on, but when you were lifting your right hand the ring fell from your hold “fuck!” You hissed trying to catch it as it bounced in the sink “fuck, no, come here” you whined as it slipped again, going directly into the drain “no, shit!” You smashed the marble, cursing your fucking office for not having a proper working sink “what the fuck!?” You groaned, hiding you face in your hands in frustration.
Why the hell did you even have to take it off? It was stupid! Why did you take. it. off?!
“Ok… it’s ok, calm down” you whispered to yourself, taking a deep breath before splashing some water in your face and redoing your make up “it’s alright, he won’t notice, and you’ll go buy a new, exact one, before he does” you tried to calm yourself down, and you were sure if anyone came near the bathroom door and heard you they’d think you have gone crazy, and maybe you have.
And just like that you continued with your day, putting on a good face and getting through your schedule. Going to meetings, getting some paperwork done and going for a drink after with your best friend, and Steve wasn’t going to be home for at least a few more days, so that gave you advantage to get a new ring.
When you finished at work you bid your goodbyes to your coworkers and almost flew to your car in the parking lot, you needed those drinks with Wanda so fucking bad.
As soon as you parked your car you made your way to the bar. You waved at the waitress as you entered before turning around to see Wanda standing up from her seat “oh my god, hi” you instantly sighed in relief as you hugged her, giving her a big squeeze before pulling away and sitting in your usual booth.
“Rough day, huh?” She chuckled at your tired face.
“Week” you corrected her with a huff, hearing her chuckle again. She knew something was off when you called her for an urgent girls night.
You ordered your usual drink, Wanda and you catching up from the two weeks you’ve been apart, when she suddenly saw you naked hand when you went to tuck your hair behind your ear.
“Sweetheart?” She asked, her demeanor getting serious now, her head tilting in her famous way.
“Hm?”
“Where is your ring?”
Well, fuck.
You let out a heavy sigh and rested your hand on the table, glancing it for a second before your head turned up to your friend, her face in a worried expression “did something happed with Steve?”
“No, non of that” you shook your head, you marriage was still the same old boring story.
Your face cringed for a moment “but I might have dropped the ring in the damn sink this morning” you winced at the memory, your eyes closing, not wanting to see the disappointed face in the redhead’s face.
But all you heard was laugher, furrowing your eyebrows you looked up at her, watching as she clutched her stomach from laughing “it’s not funny! It fell so fucking dramatically for some reason, I had a really stressful moment there!” You scoffed incredulously at her, the woman laughing even harder at your words.
You started chuckling with her, your hand going to your mouth, actually feeling bad about the whole situation, but it was hilarious really.
“Oh my god” Wanda said breathless, trying to calm down as she wiped her tears away “please tell me if was an accident” she said before taking a deep breath and looking at you.
“Of course it was! What do you take me for?”
Was it?
“Well… I know things with Steve have been a little tense after he saw the book, so I don’t know, just making sure”
You sighed and took a sip from your drink, contemplating if telling Wanda the truth was a good idea, you knew she wouldn’t judge you, but you didn’t want to bring anymore attention to the topic, and you didn’t want to feel more confused than you were feeling already. So you kept silent.
“By the way… have you read her book, already?”
“Oh no, and I don’t plan on reading it, honestly”
Wanda cleared there throat, getting visibly uncomfortable all of the sudden “what?” you asked her, sensing her nerves flooding around her.
“You should read it” she sighed, and the pity look she gave you… you didn’t like that look at all.
“Why?” Your voice sounded rough, your eyes glaring at the woman.
“It’s just- I don’t- just read it, alright? You really should…”
Ok now you were the one who was nervous, what the fuck did that woman write about? I mean, the note she left on your book…
This one is for you… good luck, babe.
Those words haunted you at night.
“Wanda…” you were starting to get a really uneasy feeling here “did Agatha write about me?”
Wanda instantly held your hands in hers “I’m so sorry” she said squeezing your hands, but you quickly retreated them, flinching from it like her hold was fire. You stared at her, shock all over your features.
She wouldn’t be capable, right? She did not write about you, maybe Wanda mistook it, maybe the book was about someone else. Agatha wasn’t that cruel to write about you. After all these years, you thought she even forgot about you, your past together. But you did hurt her. You broke her heart. Fuck.
“I-I’m sorry Wands, I have to go”
Without another word you left the bar, not even hearing your friend begging you to stay behind you. Your heart and mind raced, every memory, every feeling, every bit of your past with Agatha starting to flood out. How could she write about such thing? Knowing you had a husband, a life, a reputation. What if people found out it was about you? It could ruin your whole life!
Not noticing how or when, you found yourself parked outside of your place, rushing out of your car you made your way inside, running upstairs, into your bedroom. Flicking the light on, you entered your walk in closet, bringing the chair you had in the corner to the shelves. After taking your heels off you got on it, searching for the book in the back of your closet, whining when you didn’t find it “where the fuck are you?” You got on the arm of the chair, throwing all your purses off the shelve when you saw it pressed against the wall “there you are, fucker” you said under your breath, grabbing the book and getting off the chair.
You instantly sat on it with a huff, not even bothering to take off your suit. You took a deep breath and opened the book, scoffing as you saw the autograph again.
The hours passed and you still were reading the book, your eyebrows formed in a deep frown as you did, not believing your own eyes. And when you flipped the last page, you stared at the last words, suddenly feeling how hard it was to breathe, unbuttoning your blouse at the top.
You felt like you were suffocating, having just read you entire fucking college life in a book. Your hands trembled, tears running down your cheeks as you got up, the book still in your hand. You stared at it for a minute, trying to process everything you just read, did she really see you this way? So selfish, so heartless, so cruel.
You were not that way, you had to leave her, for your own good, for your future. You could not be that way, you could not be like her, you just couldn’t, your parents… they would have disowned you, hated you even, she knew that. Why the fuck did she write you this way? Like you were the fucking villain?
Anger filled your body and mind in a second, letting out a broken scream as you threw the book across the room, and then a rush of sadness waved into you, your knees gave out on you, collapsing in the floor, sobbing heavily into your hands as you tried to grasp everything around your head.
How could she do this to you?
She exposed your whole life just like that, like you were nothing but a mere inspiration to get money and fame. And she had the balls to send you a personal copy, like she was making fun of you in the process.
After you got out every emotion from your system you got up and went to wash your face and change into your sleeping clothes. You went to bed, but not before taking some sleeping pills, you knew there was no other way you could rest if it wasn’t with them, as much as you hated them.
“Hey there, doll”
You heard a familiar voice behind you, and without even turning around you chuckled, still a little dizzy from the drinks you’ve taken “hi Aggie”
The brunette girl sat by your side at the stairs, comfortable silence grew between the two of you, the only sound coming from inside of the house, the frat party in it’s peak. You both contemplated the starts on the dark sky for a while, until you broke the silence “it’s beautiful tonight” you whispered without taking your eyes off the atmosphere.
“It is” Agatha agreed with you, but she had her eyes on your side profile, admiring your soft features, how your lips curled into a smile and your eyes glowed before you turned your head to her “come with me” she said standing up from the stairs, her hands reaching for you to take.
“Where to?”
“Don’t you trust me?” She winked at you, causing you to giggle and grab her hand, of course you trusted her, always.
She guided you through the backyard into a forest you didn’t even know there was “Aggs, where are we going?” You asked her nervously, you weren’t a big fan of being in a forest in the middle of the night, so you glued yourself to the slightly taller girl, your arm grabbing hers a little too tight, but she didn’t mind at all.
“It’s ok, we’re not far” she hummed as she kissed your temple and held you close to her in a protective way.
Not even a minute after you arrived into a large plain land, only a big tree in the middle “wow” you looked around, it looked gorgeous, seeing different types of flowers around the area “how did you find this?”
“I come here for my witchery rituals”
You scoffed and turned to her, finding her with a teasing smile and a raised eyebrow “yeah, great joke” you rolled your eyes at her.
“You know I like to take walks, one day I kind of got lost and ended here somehow” Agatha chuckled at the memory, taking your hand in hers again and guiding you to the big tree.
She sat under it, tapping her lap you sat down next to her and laid you head on her lap. You sighed and closed your eyes as she began to stroke your hair, you always felt at peace when she was around. Everyone said she was mean and too sarcastic but you never thought that was true, she wasn’t like that with you at least. And you liked her sarcasm.
“Can I ask you something, pet?” Agatha asked you interrupting your thoughts, you looked up at her and nodded, waiting for her to continue “What will happen to us after finishing college?”
Not this again… you sighed and sat up from her lap, not noticing the pained features from your… friend as you did so “Agatha we talked about this”
“I know but… this is real, what we have, what I feel for you it’s very real” she felt like she was begging for you, and she fucking hated that, she has never, ever, had to beg for anyone.
“Agatha…” you huffed and stood up from the grass, your hands rubbing your face in frustration “since the beginning I told you this was only a fling ok? And you agreed. If my-“ you winced at the thought “if my parents find out… it would be the end of me, they expect me to get married to the perfect man-“
“Steve” it was Agatha’s turn to huff in frustration, the name leaving her lips in a despite tone. She stood up and turned you around, her hands resting on your cheeks “you really think he’s gonna make you happy?”
You didn’t answer her right away, both of you knowing too well what the truth was “that doesn’t matter” you whispered and took her hands off your face.
“It does! It does matter” she grabbed your face again in determination, her forehead resting against yours “the only thing that matters is you here, not them, not whatever they want for you, only what you want”
You looked into her eyes, trying to keep the tears at bay from your own, your breath hitching as you felt hers lips ghost over yours “Aggie…” your voice sounded pained, but before you could say anything else she smashed her lips against yours.
The kiss was harsh at first, Agatha took all her frustration into it, her tongue intruding you mouth, making you moan in surprise at her demeanor. One of her hands snook itself on your waist, pulling your body flush against her. Your hands caressing the back of her neck made her pull away “I’m sorry” she whispered before kissing you again, softer this time.
She knew this was probably going to be the last time she had you like this, and she wanted to savor it, she wanted to make you never forget about it, about her.
Because she was never going to forget about you.
Your tongues swirled together, her hand on your waist gripping you tightly, afraid you were going to pull away at any time, she could feel your tears damping her cheeks, your hearts heavily beating against your ribcages.
And when you pulled away to breath you saw the pain in Agatha’s gaze. You took a step back, putting some distance between you, knowing you would fall for it if she tried to kiss you again.
“I’m so sorry, I’m not-“
“You are not what, huh?”
The blue eyed girl looked at you, her expression changing completely, clenching her jaw as she started at you in challenge.
“I’m not like this… I’m not like you”
“Bullshit! You’re only lying to yourself here”
You shook your head, more tears running down your cheeks “please don’t do this” you let out a broken sob.
“Don’t do what!? Are you kidding me? After being your fucking little secret for two years you have the balls to tell me you’re not like me? What the fuck am I, huh?” You could hear the hurt in her voice, the betrayal, and it only made you sob harder into your hands, this was the last thing you wanted to happen “I hate you”
You woke up with a gasp, immediately sitting up on the bed, your hands going to your heavily beating chest. You tried to ease your breath, wiping a tear that escaped from your eye “it’s alright, it was just a dream” you said to yourself, taking deep breaths as you walked to the bathroom. But it was not just a dream. It was exactly what happened the last time you spoke to Agatha.
You got into the shower, the warm water calming you down instantly. Replaying the scene in your head you slid yourself down the shower wall, hiding your head between your knees. You did her so dirty, you betrayed her, you played with her. You really didn’t mean to, you were a young girl, you wanted to have fun, to feel free before being tied down into the life you were living now.
But you fell deeply for her.
And you didn’t think of the consequences, you were selfish. And god… you were like her, you are and you will always be. You’ve never liked boys, every time Steve touched you it was like fire, you wanted to get away from it as far as possible. His kisses… it were nothing like Agatha’s, her lips here so soft, she tasted so sweet, and her touch, she was so careful with you, so fucking soft, and Steve… he was so rough, so cold doing it, and his beard, the way it scratched your face, you fucking hated it.
“Fuck” you sobbed heavily, your arms hugging your legs to your chest. You fucked up, and only because you wanted to make your parents proud of you, they had your life planned since you were a baby, and you didn’t want to let them down.
But you let yourself down in the process.
You lost yourself.
Maybe you could get your happiness back. You were so tired of living this miserable life, next to a man you didn’t love, in this house you barely could call home, you felt so out of place. But it wasn’t late to redo your story. To make things right, for you.
You could start by talking with Steve, asking for a divorce. And… talk to Agatha, apologize to her.
And you did that, you talked to Steve that very night he arrived home from his trip. It wasn’t easy, and you didn’t tell him the Agatha part of course. You knew he suspected something, but he understood without asking too much and you ended things peacefully.
The next day you saw Agatha was having a book signing event, so you decided to pay her a visit.
You decided to wear something casual but elegant, unconsciously wanting to impress the woman. You threw on some black pants and a purple knit sweater off the shoulder, finishing it with a basic black heels. Looking at the mirror you took a deep breath and straightened your top “ok, you got this”
As you entered the bookstore the anxiety increased inside of you, clutching the book to your chest for some support. You walked around the place searching for her, and then you saw her, stopping on your tracks, your heart skipping a beat as you watched her seated at a table, signing a book while she talked to the overly excited woman before her.
Fuck, she looked even better than on the tv, she looked fucking gorgeous, her brunette hair in it’s wavy and chaotic nature. Your fingers flinched around the book, remembering how soft it felt around them, how she loved when you caressed it while you both laid on the bed, studying or talking about some random thing.
Jesus, focus.
You didn’t even know if she was still single, probably not, and it was ok. You only came here to talk to her and apologize… right?
After 10 minutes of waiting in line it was finally your turn, feeling your heart in your throat you took a step toward her, laying the book in front of her with your shaky hands, her eyes busy reading a paper next to her “do you want some personal-“ she froze mid sentence, shocked when she saw the autograph in your book.
She slowly looked up at you, and when your eyes met it was like the world stopped in the act, only the two of you existed. Agatha stood up from the chair, rounding the table while she never took her eyes off you. When she stood before you her hand tried to reach your cheek but she hesitantly retreated it to her side “is it really you?” She asked you, her eyes scanning your face for reassurance.
“In flesh and blood”
Agatha suddenly grabbed your hand, she whispered something to a woman next to the table before she guided you somewhere to the back of the bookstore. When she pulled you into a room she locked it before she turned to you “I never thought I’d see you again” she said in disbelief, taking a step towards you.
You didn’t hesitate for a second, needing to feel her against you after all this time, your arms wrapped around her “I’m so sorry Agatha” you whispered against her shoulder.
Agatha immediately accepted your hug, sighing into your hair as she squeezed your frame softly. You felt so good, you still smelt so sweetly, so addicting. She relaxed into your arms, feeling your hands rubbing her spine.
She missed you so much.
But… you hurt her. She pulled away, her eyebrows curling into frown “what are you doing here?” Her voice cold all of the sudden, like she was shielding herself from you.
“Agatha…” you tried to get closer again but she took a step back, her features turning in a warning “I came here to apologize. I read your book and… even though it really hurt me I realized how bad I hurt you too in the past” You never left her eyes, trying to tell her with your own you were being sincere “I’m sorry…”
The woman stared at you for a minute, studying you, before she briefly nodded “it’s ok, I apologize too for the things I said in the book”
“You treated me like a villain”
“Well you treated me like trash, so I think we’re even”
You pursed your lips, nodding your head as you started to pace around the room, only realizing it was an office “I know, I was a fool, a stupid girl who only wanted the approbation of my parents. I only wanted wanted to make their dreams come true, not even realizing my dream was… you” the last word escaped your lips in a whisper, the shock of your own confession rooting you on the spot.
Agatha’s mouth fell agape, sucking in a sharp breath, the last thing she expected today was this. To finally see and hear you opening your heart to her, and to yourself.
You turned around to her, seeing her hands clutch her chest, her soft lips slowly curling into a small smile “I know you didn’t expect me to come here, and tell you this, but I needed to, and I wanted to tell you that I’m getting my life back. I’m going to take the reins of my life and be true to myself. And I know that you probably are not interested in me anymore, or still hate me, and I won’t judge you. Maybe you’re in a relationship and I don’t want to confuse y- mphh!”
Agatha, tired of hearing your rambling, grabbed you by the waist and smashed her lips against yours. Just like the last time you kissed, but this time she knew this was the first of many.
Your hands flew to her shoulders to steady yourself, shocked for a moment. But when Agatha’s tongue stroked your lips for entrance you let her, humming into her mouth as your hands travelled to her cheeks.
“Fuck, I missed you, pet” she whispered against your lips, making you smile at the pet name before kissing her again. Her soft lips danced against yours while she slowly backed you up against the office desk, her hands sneaking into your sweater, goosebumps erupting your skin as she stroked your bare back.
Then suddenly a knock startled you both, making her pull away from you “Miss. Harkness, the five minute break is up”
Agatha groaned in frustration, and you hid your laugh behind your hand “wait outside for me, ok? I’ll go in a minute” she sighed before kissing your cheek.
“But what about all that people?” You asked her. Referring to all the fans waiting for her to sign their books.
“Whatever, I’m tired to signing books that will be resold in some random web for way too much money” Agatha said with disdain, rolling her eyes and waving her hands dramatically.
You watched her leave the room after sending you a wink, still chuckling at her antics.
Oh, how you’ve missed her.
Without bringing too much attention, you left the book shop and waited the woman on the parking lot, leaning against your car and hugging your arms tightly at the chilly air.
After a few minutes you saw her walk towards you, her arms opening for you, making you smile and instantly falling into her welcoming embrace. You stayed like that for a while, your face hiding into her neck as you took in her scent, her fresh, floral scent that always made you dizzy.
“So… no more Steve?” Agatha asked you, pushing you away softly as she tuck your hair behind your ear, taking in your features.
“No more Steve” you said to her, chuckling.
Agatha sighed in relief. She asked you to go to her place with her, and you of course accepted.
As soon as you arrived to her house, Agatha was all over you, pulling you against her frame, her kisses becoming needy as she guided you down the hallway to the stairs.
“Agatha, we should talk” you told her, your breath trying to ease while she trailed her kisses down your jaw.
“I know” her voice hushed between kisses you almost didn’t hear her.
“Then stop” you let out a giggle, trying not to trip over the stairs as she guided you up.
When you arrived to the second floor the woman pushed you back against the corridor wall softly, her nose rubbing against yours as she looked into your eyes “do you really want me to?” She hummed, leaving little pecks all around your face.
No, you really didn’t. It’s been so long since you felt this way, twelve years to be exact, the way she ran her hands all over your body even with the barrier of your clothes, the way she kissed you so sweetly, so desperate.
“No” you whispered to her, pulling her into another kiss. You could talk later, anyway.
Agatha chuckled against your lips, pulling you into her bedroom. She kicked the door with her foot and dragged you towards the bed, her hands pushing the sweater over your chest, you helped her take it off, giggling as she took in your barely covered chest, her fingers caressing the lace fabric of your bra.
Your hands worked on unbuttoning her shirt as Agatha continued to explore your skin with her fingertips, an when they reached your waist she suddenly shoved you on the mattress, earning a surprised yelp from you “you don’t know how many times I’ve dreamt of this very moment”
Agatha discarded her shirt while her eyes burned into yours “countless nights with so many women, and only being able to think about you, trying to imagine they were you”
You breath hitched at her words, the thought of her with other women, but with you in her mind made your insides burn in desire “they were never like you, no one can compare to you”
“Aggie” you whined her name needy, watching as she crawled on the bed after she took off her pants, a smirk in her lips as she ghosted them over your skin on your stomach and chest.
“Tell me…” she hummed softly, her hands working on pulling you out of your pants “did Steve make you come like I did?” Her eyebrow raised at you, seeing how you only shook your head “you know I like words, pet”
“No” you huffed at her, feeling her hand travel to your back, unclasping your bra with too much ease “he never-“ a gasp interrupted you, Agatha’s mouth closing around your nipple.
“He never what? Mh?” She fucking knew what she was doing, her knee pressing up against your center, making you go mad under her touch, torturing you.
She watched you struggle to let any word out, breathing heavily while she toyed with your breasts, nipping and sucking one and pinching the other. She could feel the wet spot on your panties against her knee, your hips rolling on it trying to get some friction, loving how desperate you were for her already.
“Come on… you can say it, beautiful” she said pouting her lips at you, almost as if she was mocking you, and she was. It made you huff at her, a scoff appearing on your features “oh no, none that” she grabbed your jaw, her tone in a warning “behave, alright?”
You nodded making the woman hum in satisfaction “he never has made me come” you whispered out the words, redness creeping up your neck and cheeks, feeling embarrassed at the fact that, in ten years, only you’ve been able to satisfy yourself.
“Aw, my poor thing” Agatha kissed your cheek, she actually felt bad for you. She couldn’t imagine to be stuck with a man for ten years, having to satisfy him almost every night. But she was going to make it up for you “must have been pretty frustrating, mh?”
“Yes” you whined as she started nipping at your neck, your hand going into her wavy hair, your hips rolling into hers unconsciously “Aggie?” You called for her, causing the woman to look at you, pecking your lips in a soft way.
“What do you want, pet?” She already knew, of course she knew, but she wanted to hear you say it, she needed to hear it from you.
“Touch me, please” your eyes stared into her blue ones “make me feel good” she smiled at you, letting out a chuckle before she kissed you.
Her tongue explored your mouth while she helped you taking off your lace panties, leaving you completely bare before her. You immediately wrapped your leg round her hip, feeling her fingers dancing down your belly painfully slow. When she reached your mound, slipping her index finger in your clit you both moaned.
She trailed her lips down your chest, her fingers rubbing your wetness all over your lips and clit “you’re soaking wet, and I barely touched you” she breathed out, leaving kisses and bites all over your figure. Your back arched to wards her, only being able to let out low moans as she kept playing with your clit, you hips moving against her hand “stay still” she kissed your hip, her free hand pushing them down as she made herself comfortable between your legs.
Fuck. The sight of her kissing your thighs, her eyes never leaving yours, it made you clench around nothing. Just realizing how much you have really missed having her like this, making you heavenly desperate for her. Not being able to think properly, only with her clouding your mind.
And when you felt her tongue lick between your lips back to your clit you whole mind and body crumbled. Your head snapping back into the pillow as you let out a loud gasp, hearing Agatha moan into you “fuck, I missed how good you tasted, doll”
She became feral in that moment, eating you up like a mad woman, sucking and nipping at your clit. Loving every sound she pulled from you, how your hands clutched her sheets tightly, trying not to move your hips, obeying to her.
Her name came from your lips in a cry, two fingers pushing inside of you without a warning. She chuckled against your clit at your state, making your body shiver from the vibrations.
You looked so cute, your mouth parted as you tried to control your breathing, eyes closed shut and eyebrows turned into a little frown. Your hand interlocked into her hair, pulling her closer into you, she would have slapped it away in any other situation. But you looked so fucked out already, she let it be, absolutely loving how tight you were clenching around her.
Her fingers in a slow pace, making you whine “if you want anything, you just have to ask for it” she hummed, leaving a kiss over your mound.
“P-please-“ you let out a broken gasp, her teeth biting at your clit “f-fuck, harder, please” you managed you breathe out, damning the woman for making you feel this way.
“Good girl” she hummed proudly, her fingers pumping harder into you, hearing your loud moans as she curled them. Her tongue licking patterns on your clit, a six letter word, Agatha, marking you as hers with the action.
You left the knot on your lower stomach tighten, your hips giving out on you and riding against the woman “fuck, I’m so close Aggie” you whined out, your legs starting to tremble around her.
When you felt her pace fasten, her sucking your clit it drove you to the edge, your orgasm exploding in powerful waves, your body stiffen against her, letting out her name in a broken moan. Agatha guided you through your high, her fingers continuing their slow pace, her lips kissing all over your thigh as she praised you “did so good for me”, “that’s it, good girl”
You weakly pulled her hand away when it became too much, hissing at the loss of contact. She kissed her way up your body, stopping face to face, admiring your flushed state, your breath trying to ease as you opened your eyes slowly to look at her, a faint smile appearing in your lips “hi” you giggled softly.
“Hello beautiful” she chuckled with you, kissing all over your face. You hummed before pulling her into a kiss, moaning when you tasted yourself on her tongue.
She laid by your side, pulling you close to her while she kept kissing you. You interlocked your leg with hers, pulling away from her to breathe. And the two of you stayed like that, your thumb stroking her cheek while her fingers draw the same six letter pattern of before on your waist.
“you’re not running away again, right?”
You could hear the fear in her voice, and it made your heart ache “I won’t, I promise I’m not going anywhere”
Agatha believed you, a smile curling in her lips as she pulled you incredibly close to her, her head sneaking in your neck “good, because I don’t want to write a whole other book about it to make you come back” she mumbled playfully into your skin, feeling your shoulders shake against her as you laughed.
And she laughed with you, both of you feeling like those twenty year old girls in college again.
Two idiots in love with each other.
#agatha harkness#agatha harkness x reader#agatha all along#x reader#agatha harkness x you#x you#fanfic#smut#angst#angst with a happy ending
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The Shape of Family ‧₊˚❀༉
As a single dad, Steve’s world revolves around school drop-offs, bedtime rituals, and tee-ball practices—and he's struggling to keep up. But you're always there, happily lending a hand when he needs it most. / part one masterlist
part two - at the rec center's fall festival, you and steve finally make plans to hang out 11k
a/n - how did this end up twice as long as the first chapter this was supposed to be a short one!! general warnings/tags here
── .✦
Utah’s pretty this time of year. Fall is in full swing. The maple and cottonwood mellow into rich shades of orange, there is a constant crush of leaves underfoot, and the crisp scent of pine needles mingle with the breeze. Your neighbors go all out to decorate. Pumpkins are for sale on every corner and the apple orchards buzz with families for the harvest. This kind of weather has every brush of sunlight feeling like a hug you didn’t know you needed.
The rec center hosts an annual fall festival, bringing hayrides, corn mazes, and costume contests. And though you wouldn’t normally volunteer on a Sunday, Steve’s hard to say no to. It’s not like he begged you or anything, a half-shrug and simple “If you want to” was enough convincing.
You’d volunteer with or without Steve. You have the time and the goodwill and thus it’s a cork on the end of your monotonous work-week. But there’s no denying that Steve makes it a hell of a lot more enjoyable. He’s the sunrise after a long night, guiding you into the days ahead. And yeah, maybe you’re romanticizing too much. Too caught up in the way his tongue sticks out when he’s concentrating or how he mumbles to himself when he forgets you’re near. But working with him is delightful, nonetheless.
You and Steve are friends now. Well, work friends. You’ve never actually hung out outside of the rec center but there isn’t a Friday that one of you doesn’t mention it while you eat lunch in his office. You’ve learned trivial little things about him, like his favorite brand of pen, the store he buys his groceries from, and how he likes his coffee– hot enough to burn, with as much sugar as he can get away with without attracting strange looks. You ask about Penelope often and he’s very open; eager to rant and rave about the latest details of their lives. She visits every now and then, usually too sick or naughty to be at school. So you’ve come to know her just as much. That she loves Barbies and Salt-N-Pepa and insects but not the furry ones.
Being in each other’s lives is routine at this point– parking beside his car, leaving sticky notes on his desk, setting your bag in his office. It would be crazy to say you love him, you don’t, obviously, but you feel like you could. And you know you’d be devastated if he left the center. Your shift assignments are arranged so they almost always thread with his.
He’s always hated asking for help, but then you came, puttering into his office with a lovely smile and open arms and suddenly it’s not so bad. He’ll ask for your assistance on more projects than not: your advice, your creative eye, your hands to hang something that he most certainly could do alone.
Like now, you trail only a few paces behind Steve, cradling a wicker basket full of decorations. He billows a tablecloth over the nearest picnic table, considering your dispute over the best holiday.
“I dunno, I’m more of a Christmas guy,” Steve shrugs, smoothing out a ripple in the fabric. “The music is just inarguably better. You get to open presents and eat delicious food. Not really a contest in my book.”
You hum, centering a plastic pumpkin.
“Penelope is like the queen of Halloween, though.” The corners of his eyes crinkle with mirth. “This morning, she told me she wished she was born on Halloween so she could go trick-or-treating on her birthday.”
You wear a similar expression, gaze flicking over to Penelope. She’s not far, crouched in a strip of dirt, parting a pile of leaves to search for ladybugs and other creatures. “I bet she’s excited for all that candy.”
“That’s all she’d eat if I let her. I’ve already scheduled a dentist appointment for her in November– But, I’m just as bad, she gets her sweet tooth from me,” he admits.
“Figured. The amount of Reese's wrappers I find in your trash.”
He squeezes your shoulder playfully, not hard enough that you should need to squirm away but you do. “Whatever. Why are you going through my trash anyway, weirdo.”
You click your tongue, “I wasn’t going through your trash! They are on the top where anyone could see.”
“Mhmm, whatever you say… dumpster diver.”
Joan, the youth counselor, whisks over to interrupt with arms full of mason jars before you can retort. Steve smothers his smirk with an answer to her question. Your tongue prods the inside of your cheek to prevent your own.
It’s like this with Steve, now. Teasing and taunting each other like schoolchildren. A game of tug-of-war, where every knowing glance and light-hearted jab pulls the rope just a little tighter between you. It’s as thrilling as it is nerve-wracking.
It’s not much later when guests filter into the festival. The earliest glow of sunset mists the courtyard in gold. There’s cider stations and pumpkin carving and a whole bunch of apple bobbers fighting to win a pumpkin pie. Monster Mash bleeds from several speakers lining the trail to the tented area you find yourself in. People dance and laugh and drink. It’s a very successful event for the rec center.
Steve plops down on the bench across from you, Penelope at his hip. A silent, self-invitation he knows you won’t decline— you enjoy their company more than people-watching. He seems to find you no matter which way you drift, even through a sea of townsfolk.
A big scoop of chili is spooned from his paper bowl into a second. “Blow on it,” Steve reminds, planting it in front of Penelope.
She does blow on it, a spray of more spit than air that merits her a shoulder nudge to knock it off.
Penelope simpers over her steaming food as Steve offers you an apologetic look. Last you saw her, she was waving her way up the stairs to the costume contest. She’s since been bundled up– a tiara traded for a knit beanie and the gown from her dress-up bin crammed underneath a thick sweater and spilling out the hem.
The string lights bathe their faces in a white glow. It highlights the beauty mark on the slope of Penelope’s cheek, like a half of Steve’s pair in the same spot. It’s not often you get to just enjoy their company. No scrambling about deadlines or standards. It’s a calm you could get used to. But Steve’s always ten steps ahead, already plotting which crew needs the most tending to when he’s finished eating. He’s selfless like that. Your feet ache from running around, but Steve’s probably worse.
“Penelope, is that what you’re wearing on Halloween?” You ask.
Her chin presses into the neckline of her sweater. “No,” she recalls, mouth full of sauce. “I’m being Dorothy.”
Steve swipes a napkin across her lips before anything drips.
“From The Wizard of Oz?”
“Mhmm,” she grins, popping the spoon out of her mouth.
“Very cool. Did you get your costume yet?”
She nods, glancing at Steve, “Daddy made it.”
Steve’s in his own little world, slurping his belly full of warm food and basking in the second of peace he‘s been given. But he blinks back into reality at your questioning stare, leaning in to hear you over the boisterous laughs of nearby people.
You try to reel in your surprise, soften your features. “You made her costume?”
“Oh,” he waves a dismissive hand, “I just sewed a shirt to a dress. Nothing fancy.”
“Still– that’s really cool, Steve.”
He stirs his food, voice torn with guilt. “I dunno. It’s cheap.”
“Costumes are better homemade. The ones in the stores are tacky. I bet it looks amazing.”
Fragments of a smile find his lips, more a peace offering than a true one.
“I painted my shoes red and I put so much glitter on them so they sparkle,” Penelope adds cheerfully.
“You did?”
She nods, shining with pride.
“It’s been two weeks and I’m still finding glitter everywhere,” Steve comments, more amused than he lets on. He can’t be that mad when they’re little reminders of his favorite person in the world.
“Are you dressing up?” You ask him.
He huffs, side-eyeing Penelope. “Yes.”
A glint forms in her eyes, a sly little smirk beneath. “Daddy is going to be the lion because he’s hairy.”
You laugh and Penelope joins you because Steve has a funny pouty face.
He rolls his eyes. “Tell ‘em who’s your Toto?”
“Cinderella!”
“No way!” You match her level of excitement. “Does she have a costume?”
“No, but I have a basket for her to sit in.”
You coo, “I bet Cinderella will love that.”
Steve snorts because he knows you know Cinderella will in fact not love that.
Cinderella is supposedly the grumpiest animal he’s ever met. She was a quick, unfortunately painful, lesson on boundaries for Penelope– not to pet certain areas or animals as a whole. Steve described her as an old, scraggly thing with a temper flaring unpredictably from one moment to the next. He wasn’t a cat person to begin with, growing up in a house with no animals probably started his revulsion to having fur on his clothes; but at two and a half, Penelope begged to feed the stray on their porch and she just kept coming back.
Steve wanted a dog when he moved out, if anything at all; but in four years he’s learned more about sacrifice than any speech his parents tried to drill into his head. And Cinderella is practically Penelope’s best friend now. She sets aside birthday money for new cat toys– the crinkly ones are her favorite– and sneaks the cat through her bedroom window from time to time. She even cradles her like a baby, not without protest and the occasional scratch, of course, but Penelope knows the risk.
“I told her Cinderella probably won’t want to come trick or treating but she can still take a picture with her at home.”
“I told you she will want to go because there’s candy.”
“Yes, but I told you cats can’t have candy,” Steve jabs her side lightly.
Penelope only pouts. “That’s sad. I think she would like candy.”
“It is,” he agrees, slotting a rogue strand of hair behind her ear. “But it makes them sick, remember? So we can’t share with Cinderella.”
Her cheek melds with his sleeve, begrudgingly agreeing with a sigh. “Can I get my face painted?”
Steve traces her line of sight to the ring of kids swarming the face painter. It’s not far. He can see well enough to recognize most of the children. Many are younger than Penelope too.
But Steve hesitates, “Can you wait until I’m done eating? I’ll go with you.”
“Daddy,” she whines, pinching his arm hair. “You take forever.”
Penelope’s got magical little eyes. You don’t know how Steve ever says no.
“I can take her,” you offer, stacking trash on your plate. “I’m done anyway.”
“No, it’s okay.” He deflates with a sigh, curling into his ribs so he can see her face. “You can go by yourself–”
Her frown washes away just as fast as she peels herself off of his arm.
“But! You have to come straight back when you’re done and you have to stay where I can see you. ‘Kay?”
“‘Kay!” She beams, nearly tripping on her dress as she swings her legs over the bench and breaks into a run.
Steve can’t hide the wobble in his smile as hard as he tries to be strong. Most of the hardships he’s faced as a parent are foreign to you, but clearly, this isn’t easy for him.
“She’ll be fine,” you reassure with a ginger squeeze to his wrist. “We aren’t far if she needs something.”
He nods, still locked in on Penelope. “I know, I know. I’m trying really hard not to be a helicopter parent as she gets older. It sucks though, feeling like she doesn’t need me anymore.”
“Steve,” you deadpan, prying his attention back. “That’s… silly. You’re her dad, of course she still needs you. Maybe not all the time or as much but she’ll always need you.”
“I dunno. I feel like she grows an inch every time I turn around. I never thought I’d say this, but I actually miss when she was in diapers. She’s cute now, but God was she cute then.” He chuckles to himself, eyes swinging from Penelope to you and then back.
“I believe it,” you grin, admiring his girl. Her cheeks are red from the cold, like two tomatoes framing her lips. She might like to wear your jacket, you consider, but she’s so small, perhaps she’ll overheat from too many layers.
Penelope scrambles into the chair when it’s her turn, talking a mile a minute to the face painter. A funny wave of emotion roves over you. There’s affection and joy and and then something heavier and harder to describe.
“I’ll have to show you her baby pictures sometime.” You hear the parting of a true smile. “There’s this one– it was her first birthday– I gave her a whole cake and she just demolished it. Had it in her hair and her eyelashes and in between her toes. She was so damn happy.”
You exhale a happy hum, turning back to Steve. He’s propped on his elbows now, close enough to discern each eyelash from the next. It doesn’t startle you as much as it just scrapes the words right off your tongue.
He’s reading you, churning, and chasing the right words all in between the blink of an eye. “We should hang out, you know? Like actually– We always talk about it but…” He shakes his head, trailing off.
He’d let the words be carried with the wind if you wanted. It’s hard to imagine you’d say no, but people have surprised him in worse ways. Just when he thinks he knows someone, truly knows them, they cut him off like he’s no more than a dying branch. The ghosts of past someones and somethings still haunt him. It makes being so forward with you all the more difficult.
You wear a whimsical sort of grin that you hide behind the brush of your hand, fighting your own flood of emotions. “Yeah– I mean, yeah. When?”
Excitement flares across his features. “What are you doing on Halloween? You could come trick-or-treating with us?”
“Probably just home handing out candy– but Steve, I don’t want to intrude on Halloween. It sounds really special to Penelope.”
“You wouldn’t! No way, Penelope would be thrilled if you came. She talks about you a lot, you know?”
“No she doesn’t,” you grin madly into your palm, peering over to her. Her face is dressed in a bright shade of orange now. With her pudgy cheeks, she reminds you of a little pumpkin.
“She does! Swear it– on my life.” He’s not lying. He can’t hold your eyes when he lies, even about silly things.
You huff, feeling foolishly giddy. “I don’t have time to get a costume, Steve.”
“Nonsense. We can find you one. I’ll make it if I have to. The Tin Man and The Scarecrow are still up for grabs.”
You swallow, washing the sudden dryness from your throat. Why does Steve have to be so damn cute and sweet all at once? “I dunno. Would it be fine if I didn’t dress up?”
He chuckles dryly. “Penelope won’t have that, I can tell you that much. Plus if I’m going to be tortured into some itchy lion onesie I expect you’ll do the same.” He’s teasing, which is typical for you both, but it’s like you’ve forgotten how.
“Steve.”
“Come on. If not for me, for Penelope. She’ll love it.”
“Okay,” you settle. But you aren’t really settling. He could ask you to dress up on any other day of the year and you’d do it.
Penelope races over– a tabby cat with long whiskers and a pastel pink nose– yelling, “Daddy, look!”
Steve beams at her like he stuck a lightbulb in his mouth, somehow brighter than before. “I see! You look so pretty, princess.”
“I’m like Cinderella.”
“You are!” He pats her former seat beside him until she sits.
Her long lashes flutter questioningly.
“Nell, don’t you think we need, I dunno, like a Tinman or a Scarecrow to go with our costumes on Halloween?”
She tracks his gaze over to you, adopting your smirk. “Are you coming trick-or-treating with us?” Her voice is uneven and bubbly with anticipation.
“Do you want me to?” You ask genuinely.
Penelope’s tongue wriggles in her mouth like she can’t find the proper words to express what she feels. But she nods in this bashful way against Steve’s shoulder that surprises you.
“Are we being shy now?” Steve remarks, pulling her into his arms effortlessly to peck her hairline.
“No,” she whines against his sweater, overjoyed to be smothered in love. Dry paint creases with her scrunched face. It’s an adorable sight. You keep wishing you had a camera on you because this is the kind of thing Steve probably puts in his photo albums.
The moon climbs the sky quickly, draping the party in a silver veil. Many stay for the campfire and the promise of smores. But the later it gets, the crankier kids become for their parents. Penelope’s no exception, whining and clinging to Steve until he agrees to hold her. And he tries to work still, but his arms are starting to burn and stamping hayride tickets isn’t easy one-handed so he makes the hard choice to leave before cleanup.
He feels awful, apologizing to several of his coworkers on the way out but most are too drunk on cider or too high on festive cheer to care. Besides, he’s paid a salary, doing this out of the kindness of his heart. He has no obligation to be here– you’d reminded him of that multiple times. But the festival does feel empty when they leave, even with half the town still around.
ᯓ★
Steve lives in a quiet pocket outside of town on a curvy, secluded stretch of road. The directions he’d scrawled out on a receipt weren’t as useful as you’d hoped as one of the street names you were intended to turn on was smudged beyond legibility. But you made it, parked in front of a white house with a similarly white picket fence. Steve’s beamer is idled to your right. It’s strange seeing it somewhere that’s not the rec center. But it’s a familiar comfort between so much new.
There’s a tire swing knotted to the oak tree in the yard, a collection of painted rocks in the pebble-lined path up to the house, and two carved pumpkins set outside the door, caving in on themselves but not yet rotting. A lot of love is shared here.
Penelope answers the door when you knock. She’s half dressed– stockings hugging a pair of fleece leggings and a flowy pajama tank top. Her eyes outline your costume and light up with approval.
You sport a flannel and denim overalls stuffed with prickly straw straight from the local farm, courtesy of Steve. But Penelope ogles your face paint more than anything– a stitched grin and two circles for blush. You hope it’s not scary looking.
She doesn’t know how to let you inside– she’s not supposed to answer the door after all– so she hangs clumsily off the door handle until you ask, “Can I come in?”
“Yes,” she teeters out of the way, closing the door behind you with a sweeping grin— the mischievous kind that makes you wonder what she’s up to.
The foyer is situated between the living room and kitchen, both of which are missing Steve.
“Where’s your dad?”
“Umm. Cleaning?”
“Oh. Are you getting ready to go?”
“Yes, but I can’t find my shoes,” she makes a strangled face and shrugs with her entire wingspan.
“Do you want me to help you look?”
She nods, “I think they’re in my closet.”
Penelope sprints up the stairs easily, leaning over the railing at the top until you hesitantly follow. You hope he won’t mind. You were technically let in.
It reeks of chemicals upstairs. You stifle a cough and hope it’s Steve, not some science experiment in Penelope’s room. But you don’t worry long. The culprit swings around the corner, juggling several bottles of solutions and sprays. Steve would’ve barreled straight into you had you not thrust your arms out in defense, but still, all his things scatter across the floor.
“Christ, you scared me.” He kneels, tucking a roll of paper towels against his chest. “Nell, you can’t answer the door without me.”
“I looked in the window.”
You hand him a sanitizer and shimmy your hat back into place. It’s too big and far too floppy, sagging over your brows no matter how you situate it. Amusement draws his cheeks up as he realizes. You look ready to plop yourself in the middle of someone’s crops and he’s in a tee and jeans you might find him in any other day. His smiley-staring only makes you feel sillier.
“The straw’s really a nice touch, huh?” Steve teases, picking a sandy stem from your collar with his free hand. He’s got that smirk you so often find on Penelope’s lips.
You yank the strand from his grasp and poke the column of his throat with it. “I’m definitely more itchy than you’ll be.”
His fingers encase the entirety of your fist like a shell. They’re knobby and mannish, stout against your own. But there’s a tenderness to his hold as he eases your fist away. You don’t push back, though you contemplate it. He’s never touched you for so long; he’s basically holding your hand.
“Could’ve been the Tinman,” he says, releasing your fingers at your thigh.
You suck in, like fuel for a reply, and exhale a breathy, nervous laugh. “And paint my entire body gray? No thanks.”
He chuckles, eyes darting behind you. “Well, you look great. You like it, Nell?”
You’d almost forgotten she was there. She’s quiet as a mouse when she wants to be.
Penelope bobs her head behind you, patiently watching from the doorway to her room. “I have oh-ralls like that.”
“You do,” Steve confirms, fidgeting with the nozzle on the disinfectant bottle. It reminds you of the smell.
“You kill someone?”
He stiffens. “What?”
You flick the bottle of Windex, serious facade fading. “Smells like you’re trying to cover it up.”
“Oh! No,” his shoulders soften, “Just a little spring cleaning… in fall.”
You hum gaily. “I like your house.”
“You do?” His voice is light, buoyant with relief. “I can give you a tour. A proper one.”
“I would but I’ve promised a patient little lady I’d help her find her shoes first.”
Penelope beams when you glimpse at her. “I think they’re in my closet,” she shares with Steve.
“I think so too,” he says, eyeing past her. “What happened to cleaning?”
“I was but I had to find my costume first.”
“It’ll be easier to find when your room’s clean.” He sends you a look, “Don’t let her trick you into cleaning for her. She’s sneaky.” Steve whispers the last part, loud and teasing.
“I’m not sneaky!”
“Mhmm. I’ll go get ready and then come help you, Nell.”
“Then trick-or-treat?”
“Yes,” he starts down the stairs, “Yell if you need me.”
Penelope tows you into her room by the arm, unphased by the clinking of toys crammed behind the door. Anything in her way gets kicked or shoved aside without a second thought. It’s like her toy chest exploded, a kaleidoscope of pink and purple across the carpet. And no wonder it’s a mess; she starts chucking things out of her closet, adding to the pile spilling out like an avalanche—books, stuffed animals, barbie dolls, baby dolls, and so so many clothes.
You squeeze by a play tent, scanning the floor.
“They’re red and sparkly, ‘member?” Penelope calls from behind her closet doors.
You tip a beanbag over with your foot, “I remember.”
She babbles to herself as she looks, just like Steve does– little hums and scraps of thought that are hard to catch. It’s a funny thing, to see it translated from one human to another.
It doesn’t take long to find the shoes, wedged underneath her bed with numerous other things. You go prone against the floor to dig them out and hold them up by the straps. “These it, Pen?”
She gasps vibrantly. You wish you got up in time to see her face.
“How did you know they were under there!” She shrieks, snatching them from you.
“Just had a feeling,” you sit up properly, happily watching her slip the flats on.
She practically twinkles, clicking her heels together like Dorothy.
“They look stunning! You painted these?”
“Yes,” she skips over to her dresser, shuffling through drawer after drawer. Anything folded surely isn’t anymore.
“You’re a talented artist.”
“I know. Daddy says.” Penelope yanks out a blue line of fabric. “My dress is so pretty. I’m going to be the prettiest Dorothy for Halloween.”
“I know you will! You should give your dad a big hug for making such a pretty dress.”
She buckles into the costume as fast as she can, patting the skirt down with a satisfied grin when it’s on.
After several compliments and much debate, you’re able to convince her Dorothy would have a clean room. Penelope puts a few things away, but she’s easily distracted. And it’s hard to blame her with so many toys about. So you do most of the cleaning, but you’re happy to. It’ll make Steve happy– lest he finds out it was you– which makes you happy.
The floor’s mostly cleared when Penelope decides Steve’s taking too long; it’s time for your house tour, with or without him. And when he doesn’t answer her shout it’s decidedly without him. She shows you downstairs first– the living room, the kitchen, the half bath, her favorite hiding spot underneath the stairs. All the while she explains her very detailed and strategic trick-or-treating plan. Staying out until midnight is the priority, she doesn’t seem to care if it’s past her bedtime, and filling several bags with candy is also high on the list.
“And this is Daddy’s room.” She jerks the door knob several times before yelling, “Daddy!”
“What?” Steve calls, muffled.
“Let us in!”
“I can’t hear you– hold on!”
Steve unlocks the door donning the promised lion onesie and a pair of sneakers. It’s ridiculous how handsome he looks even with a stupid fur collar and tail.
“Cute,” is all you manage to say. He takes it as teasing, rolling his eyes, though you really mean it.
“Can you help me? I can’t get my whiskers right.” He taps the cap of an eyeliner pen against his cheek where he’s drawn two lines.
“Sure.” You take the stick and follow him through his room to the master ensuite.
“Wait!” Penelope shouts and waves vaguely at the room. “This is Daddy’s room.”
You pause to look it over, jovially commenting, “Wow! Very nice.”
And it is nice. There’s a rustic set of furniture striped in blue and green accents; paired well with the framed floral prints above his dresser. And the bed’s made, only slightly surprising, topped with a Care Bear’s quilt you assume is Penelope’s.
In the bathroom, Steve leans against the counter, arms braced behind him on the sink rim. You shuffle in front of his legs, skimming knees accidentally. He has no abhorrence for physical touch, you know that for certain. He’s touchy with not just you, but everyone in the office. An arm around the shoulder, a pat on the back, a gentle squeeze to the arm– he gives these out like candy on Halloween. But even so, touching him isn’t always easy. It’s vulnerable, runs the risk of rejection.
Steve smiles at you, ever-patient and encouraging when you stall awkwardly.
“Sorry,” you whisper. Talking any louder feels illegal when he’s so close. You cup his jaw and steady your opposite hand against his cheek, picturing the line how you want it.
But just when you press into his skin and flick the pen, Penelope slams a drawer shut, startling you enough to flinch. The ink slants all the way behind his ear like a jagged nail.
You gasp and recoil, “Shit.”
Penelope gasps twice as loud and Steve crumples into laughter, even more so when he turns to view the damage in the mirror.
“Oops,” you chuckle nervously, thumbing at the black streak. “This washes off right?”
“Yeah, don’t worry. I’ve redone it like four times.”
You douse your finger in water and work the pad across his happy cheek gently.
He’s watching you. You don’t see, just feel it in the fringe of your peripherals. It’s not like he has many places to look when you’re a hair’s breadth from his nose. But he might as well press a magnifying glass against your face, point out every pore and blemish and hair you're insecure about.
Your cheeks burn and the beginning prickles of sweat coat your upper lip. You brushed your teeth before you arrived, but how could you forget a mint? And what about an extra layer of deodorant? That wouldn’t have hurt. You glance at Steve anxiously and his eyes jump to Penelope. For once you’re grateful not to keep his attention.
Penelope digs through his cabinet on a quest to find nothing in particular.
You pull away to judge your first line as Steve opens his mouth. “Nell, go get your brush and hair ties.”
The top half of her face pops up over the cupboard door like a puppet. “But I want my hair down.”
“I still have to brush it. And I thought you wanted the bows?”
She considers his words– her prior words– brows pinching before she shrugs, “Okay.” The cabinet door thuds against its hinges as it claps shut, and not a second later, Steve’s bedroom door slams as Penelope charges out.
“You would not believe how often I tell this kid not to slam the doors,” he scoffs, though it’s devoid of any real anger.
You take his chin again, packing away a grin. You have to focus. “Don’t move,” you prompt.
He’s relaxed in your hold. Still as a stone, maybe apart from the slight tug of his lips when you resume drawing.
“Tickles,” he murmurs when you lift the nib.
You print another three to match the trio on his right. It’s not bad, but you wouldn’t say it’s good. The angles are skewed weird and one’s shorter than the rest. But if he wants them any better, you might not be the best person to ask.
“How’s that?” You draw back, searching for any smudges.
He spins, briefly inspecting his reflection before facing you again. “Perfect! Thank you!”
Perfect is definitely a stretch.
Steve’s a perfectionist. You’ve seen it innumerably in the office. How he’ll spend hours revising something only to ruminate on an insignificant detail after. And with Penelope, every parenting decision is subject to endless second-guessing, as if her health and happiness hinges on the smallest nuances.
But as much as he’s a perfectionist, Steve would never judge you in the same way he might himself. Your whiskers truly are perfect in his eyes, not for the shape or size, but because you drew them– wonky and all.
The ink warps around his smile. You study his face under the guise of checking your work. Steve’s a handsome guy. An inviting kind of handsome, with shallow laugh lines and the start of stubble stippled across his jaw.
“Wait,” you square his shoulders, brushing the nape of his neck to reach for his hood. The lion’s mane is laid gently over the top of his hair.
“Now it’s perfect.”
He smirks. “Sexy, huh?”
“Should leave this unzipped a little. The cougars will love that.”
Steve laughs, harder than you think you’ve ever heard him. It’s so contagious even Penelope joins your hysterics when she returns, though she hasn’t a clue what you’re laughing about.
“What’s so funny?” Penelope lurches into his legs with a handful of hair things.
“We just think my costume’s kinda silly. Here, baby.” Steve heaves her onto the counter and props her right in between the sinks.
Her dress pours over her crossed legs like a layered cake, baby blue and white gingham. Steve really did a great job with the stitching; you can’t even tell it was done by hand. And Penelope hasn’t complained about the fit once so it must be comfortable too.
“Face forward please,” Steve reminds gently for a third time when Penelope twists her neck to speak.
Penelope frowns at his reflection. “You’re pulling too tight.”
“Sorry. You have to stop moving though.”
There’s a mild curve to his lips. He’s not aggravated with her fidgeting, in fact, quite the opposite. Maybe because you’re around, he’s in too good of a mood to spoil with something as trivial as his daughter's hair. But regardless, it’s endearing as it is entertaining to care for Penelope. He loves being a dad, even when it’s frustrating. And you can see the love as he braids her hair– how he cards through knots from the ends up and slowly sections off pieces to tackle one at a time.
“I’m not moving.” Her chin droops as she scratches the polish from her nails.
Steve cups her jaw, steering it back up. “You are, monkey.”
“Monkey?” She chortles, seeking your gaze in the mirror to see if you also find the nickname funny.
“Yeah,” Steve murmurs, seizing the rubber band from between his teeth. “Monkeys move a lot.”
“Do they have tails?”
“Mhmm.”
“You have a tail 'cause you’re a lion.”
Steve hums and bends back, evaluating his performance. “There. You look so gorgeous, Penelope.”
And he really has done a great job, especially with all her wiggles. Steve takes a lot of pride in styling his hair– much of his confidence derives from it. And he tries to extend that care to Penelope; to teach her how gorgeous she is and that she deserves to be nurtured.
Penelope shakes her head disapprovingly. “I’m Dorothy now, Dad.”
“Oh, sorry.” Steve turns toward you instinctually, happy to catch your smile.
“You look very very pretty, Miss Dorothy,” you correct.
She slides off the counter, aided by Steve’s hand. “Can we go now?”
Penelope waits patiently in the foyer for Steve to gather everything needed to leave. This lasts for all of about ten minutes before Penelope is halfway out the front door, too excited to wait any longer.
“Wait, Nell!” Steve shouts from beside you in the kitchen.
You’re choosing snacks and filling water bottles. Steve doesn’t really need to pack a bag for Penelope anymore, she’s a year and a half past diapers, but he likes to feel prepared.
When Penelope doesn’t answer, he meets her on the porch to explain, “I’m almost done. And we still have to take pictures.”
“I don’t wanna. I’m ready to leave.”
“Well, we aren’t leaving until I get a picture of Dorothy.”
She sighs, lugging herself back inside like she’s got bricks for shoes. “What about Cinderella?”
“Go and look– get the treats.”
She scrambles into the kitchen, snagging a jar of cat treats from the counter quickly. You shoulder the backpack and follow her out. Steve joins you not long after, two flashlights and several glowsticks in hand.
“No Cinderella?” Steve asks, unzipping the bag pressed to your back to stock with more things.
“No,” Penelope pouts, vigorously shaking the jar in the air. “How can I be Dorothy without Toto.”
He yanks the zipper back up, then pats her head, “Keep calling. Where’s your jacket?”
“I don’t need it.”
“You will. It’s gonna get cold later. When it’s dark.”
“It’ll mess up my costume. Dorothy doesn’t wear one.”
“Let's bring it, just in case. I’ll carry it.”
Steve jogs back inside, coming out this time with a camera around his neck, a jacket over his shoulder, and a plushie in hand.
“Here,” he sets a blue stuffed dog on Penelope’s lap. “Backup Toto.”
Penelope glares up at him, insulted. “This isn’t Toto.”
“I know. But if we wait for Cinderella we might not have time for trick-or-treating. Why don’t we bring the treats? See if she’s started without us?”
Penelope deflates, stuffing the dog in her wicker basket.
“Can I take your picture now?”
“Why, Daddy?”
“So I can remember how beautiful you look tonight.”
A petulant bow creases her lips as she peers up. Round, sullen eyes connect with his.
Steve squats in front of her, taking her much smaller free hand in his. “I know you’re sad about Cinderella but she’d still want you to have fun, right? And she might show up later. I just want to get a picture now so I don’t forget.”
Penelope nods and Steve kisses her forehead, standing and backing up a few paces.
“Smile, baby. Please?” He blinks at her through the viewfinder.
She offers a strangled face– more of a toothy open mouth than a smile; not even close to wide enough to round her cheeks or crescent her eyes like the real deal. But it’s funny and just as cute. Steve snaps a photo and the expression drains from her face as fast as the camera’s flash.
You wander behind Steve and her eyes flick to you. You try funny faces first, frowning so deep your jaw aches, pulling the tip of your nose up like a pigs, winking terribly, but none of it works. Your fingers arch into bunny ears behind Steve’s hair and you stick your tongue out at the back of his head, but still, no dice.
You have a really awful idea. You’re pretty sure you might die of embarrassment. But it’s worth it to get Penelope to smile.
“Hey, Penelope? Remember when you told me dinosaurs are silly?”
She nods.
“Well, I have a really good dinosaur impression. Can I show you?”
She nods again, equally jaded.
You take a deep breath and shake your head, mentally preparing yourself and simultaneously erasing Steve from existence for the moment. A feral screech erupts from the back of your throat, the kind of sound you didn’t know for sure you could make.
Steve buckles in his crouch, barely catching himself on the pavement with his free hand. A chorus of emotions ripple his features. He’s shocked and then amused and finally focused on capturing the picture, but what resonates the most is a fondness for you.
You cup a hand over your mouth, rendering a string of different noises, inspired by several animals because what the hell does a dinosaur sound like anyway? You haven’t the faintest clue at the moment.
Penelope fuses her lips together, unbreaking.
“Come on Nell, I see that smile,” Steve rallies.
But she doesn’t give up easy. She’s like Steve in that way.
As a last resort, you press your lips to your mouth, blowing a raspberry and screwing your face in disgust. “Oh my God, Steve! Did you just fart?”
He gapes at you, then Penelope, tickled and tongue-tied for comebacks. He can’t think straight, not when you’re making a delightful fool out of yourself, on his behalf, especially. As far as he’s concerned, Penelope’s smiling now or at least failing awfully at hiding it. So he takes several photos of her as she unravels into a giggly heap on the driveway.
Certainly one of them is photo-album-worthy, but you continue your stunts anyway. “Goodness, what did you eat today?” You backpedal a few steps, fanning the surrounding air, partially to hide your own laugh. “Penelope do you smell that?”
“Ew! Daddy!”
You aren’t sure if Penelope actually believes you or if she just wants to join the fun but either way, she’s convincing.
“I didn’t do it!” Steve defends, dropping the camera on its sling and raising his hands in surrender. “I think it was Penelope this whole time.”
You gasp. “Penelope!”
“I didn’t!” She cries, shaking her head aggressively. “I promise, I didn’t!”
“I dunno. The closer I get the more stinky it smells.” Steve slinks up to her with outstretched hands that threaten tickles.
She screams when he snatches her up, swearing up and down, “I didn’t, Daddy!”
He’s well-practiced at being the tickle monster; knows every sensitive strip of skin to target. She was doomed from the start. Giggles spill out in jagged layers punctuated with gasps of air. Steve tickles her all the way down the driveway to the car, out of breath himself by the time he sets her on the trunk.
Penelope deliriously eyes his hands where they rest on the beamer.
“You ready to go trick-or-treating, Little Miss Dorothy?” You ask.
She nods, dimples deepening with mirth.
“Here. Will you start it?” Steve fishes his keys out of his pocket and tosses them to you. “Come on, pretty girl.”
She slides into her car seat happily, bouncing with excitement as he buckles her in. Steve’s told you before it’s not always so easy.
“I really didn’t fart,” Penelope says.
He chuckles, sewing a kiss to her cheek, “I know, baby. We’re just kidding.”
Steve settles into the driver’s seat, depositing the stack of developed polaroids in your lap. You shuffle through as he backs out, flashing him your favorites; the best is one where she’s planted a hand on her hip and is rolling her eyes. You adore this little drama queen more and more every day.
The drive’s only a few minutes, just to a denser part of the neighborhood to avoid long stretches with no houses. Steve parks against an empty grass lot behind another car. This area’s already bustling with kids which adds to Penelope’s anticipation.
“Daddy, look– it’s Minnie Mouse!”
Steve inspects the crowd through the window. “Yeah, you remember when you were Minnie Mouse?”
“I was?”
“Mhmm. You had ears and I painted your face. You were little.” He unbuckles, grabbing the backpack stashed at your feet.
“Oh. Am I still little?”
He pauses to melt, just to himself and only a bit. It’s too early to be sentimental– a long night of fun awaits. Steve cranes over his seat to see her face. “Yes, you’re still little. But you’re growing a lot. I think you might be as tall as me, one day.”
“Nooo,” she giggles, waving her foot at him.
“I dunno,” he sing-songs back, squeezing her shoe before turning back around.
Steve distributes a handful of glowsticks, shoving a few extra in Penelope’s basket. You guys start down the block as the sun sinks below the treeline, more than enough time to complete Penelope’s plan which she reminds you of. She takes Steve’s hand, then yours, and it strikes you suddenly how much you appear as a family to outsiders. It’s not an unwelcome feeling, just a strange one.
At the first house, Penelope knocks hard and declares to the elderly woman who answers, “Trick or treat!” She repeats it, insisting with wide eyes that she deserves two pieces of candy for her double effort. And the woman can’t resist her charm, obliging with a handful of pieces. Steve jokes it off, calls her a bargainer, but you gawk at the interaction.
At the second house, she points to you and Steve, arguing you deserve candy too since you’re both in costume. And it works, scoring you each a piece that ends up in her tote anyway. By the third, you can’t keep a straight face, her antics are hilariously cute and you compliment Steve for raising such a little mastermind.
You fall into a routine steadily, loafing along the road with Steve while Penelope trots up to each house.
“Last year she was Snow White and the year before a cat,” Steve explains when you ask.
“She likes princesses’.”
“Less so now but yeah. She used to say she wanted to be a princess when she grew up.”
“Can’t blame her.” You watch her fondly from afar. She picks a piece of candy off the ground and debates before tossing it in with the others. “What does she wanna be now?”
“Changes all the time. Last it was a detective.” He beckons Penelope over. “Nell, what do you want to be when you grow up?”
She fiddles with her basket handle. You’ve done two streets and it’s almost full. You're starting to think you’ll have to buy a pillowcase off of someone.
“Umm… Can I be a trick-or-treater?”
“What!” Steve flips her braid over her shoulder, “That’s just for one day, goofball.”
“Well… then,” she hums, squinting at the surrounding swarm of characters and creatures. “Maybe a pirate?”
You and Steve share a look of amusement. You do that a lot now. It’s instinctual. Finding each other's eyes, even in a room full of people it’s easy. Sometimes there’s just too much joy not to share.
“Daddy, how many houses are left?”
“There’s quite a few on this street. You tired?”
“No. Can I see? I want to count.”
She doesn’t seem tired to you but Steve’s able to read her with the tiniest details. It’s like he’s got superpowers sometimes– dad superpowers. But maybe he’s just guessing, it’s getting closer to bedtime.
Steve boosts her onto his shoulders with a hefty groan about “getting old” which you bicker over because he’s only twenty-six.
Penelope counts eleven houses, eight with lights on, but buzzes about a particular home illuminated with rainbow LEDs and a giant spider. And it’s even cooler than she described up close, mansion-like, decked out with spotlights and decorations taller than you and Steve combined.
A motionless clown holds a bloody bucket of candy outside. Their decorations are so extravagant, it’s hard to tell what’s real and what’s fake. But you’re pretty sure the clown just blinked and you make sure Steve’s aware of that, not that he was letting Penelope go alone anyway.
Steve scoops Penelope up before she gets very far up the driveway despite her complaints.
“I’m not scared, Daddy,” she assures. And there’s nothing that tells you she is– she’s just as cheery and bright-eyed as before.
“I know, princess.” He rubs her arm, scanning for other statues with the potential to come alive. “I’m kinda scared, though.”
She tips her head at him, puzzled because it’s always the other way around. But her arms coil around his neck, a loving press of affection that she learned from him.
And whether he’s actually afraid to be jumpscared or just subconsciously ingraining in her that it’s okay if she is, you aren’t really sure. Probably both, and either way, it warms your insides.
The clown cocks its head slowly when Penelope reaches in the bowl.
She cocks her head back, innocently amused. “Trick-or-treat?”
The clown nods, pushing the bowl toward her.
Steve sags just a hair but remains very much on high alert.
You mouth your appreciation— “Thanks.” Thanks for not scaring my coworker-friends-child who I’ve grown really fond of and would hate to see cry.
“Daddy, can we go in there?” Penelope points to a tunnel opening, fringed with black streamers and flashing lights– some sort of haunted house walk-through that wraps around the home.
“No, baby. That’s for big kids.”
She spots a group of teenagers exit the other side, screaming, laughing, and doubling over each other into the grass.
“I really wanna go– please, I’ll be so brave. I’m not even scared,” she pleads, flashing him a wobbly frown.
But there’s no expression she could pull right now that would change his mind, not when he hears a chainsaw buzzing inside. She could throw herself on the ground and kick and cry and he’d still refuse. He knows enough kids that have been traumatized by horror-movie-type creatures and characters; he’ll be damned if his daughter becomes one of them.
Penelope sulks for a few houses but she has loads more candy to collect and decides not to waste her time for too long.
“Can you hold this?” She thrusts her basket toward Steve. It’s overflowing at this point; you’ve all started cramming candy in your pockets, hoping it’s cold enough outside that nothing melts. Steve’s been beating himself up for three blocks for forgetting the backpack in the car.
“Sure,” he says, retracting his hand from his pocket.
But before he takes it, you joke, “Better keep an eye on him. He might eat some when you’re not lookin’.”
Penelope studies him for a long moment before shifting the bag toward you.
“Penelope! You don’t really believe that do you?” He scoffs, breathily laughing.
You cackle as she shrugs and sprints to the next house.
Steve bumps your shoulder, snaking a hand in the basket to steal a pack of M&Ms off the top. “Blowin’ my whole operation.”
“Steve,” you scold and bump him back. “Don’t get me in trouble.”
“She won’t notice.” He waves you off, tearing the wrapper with his teeth. “But if she does I’m saying it was you.”
You whack his arm, glowing bright as the moon, “Asshole.”
Penelope doesn’t complain about her feet aching once the whole night and you know they probably do because yours started hurting forever ago. Surely she gets some kid-sized Oscar for that. And Steve being the great dad he is offers to carry her on the way back to the car anyway.
“Daddy?”
Steve hums, hoisting her up where she slips.
“Can we go trick or treating tomorrow?”
He glances at you, confirming you also hear this cuteness. “No, baby. Tomorrow’s not Halloween.”
“I know, but we should still go. I bet lots of people still have candy. Like, leftovers.” She yawns into his shoulder where his fur hood has been tugged down to warm his neck and double as a makeshift pillow.
“Don’t you have enough candy?”
“No. I need more Reese’s for you.”
“You’re gonna give them to me?”
“Only some. I like them too.”
“That’s kind of you.”
Her eyes are half-lidded and struggling, but she’s still awake as Steve stows her into her car seat. She chatters sluggishly to keep herself up and you and Steve entertain it; it’ll make bedtime easier if she doesn’t fall asleep in the car. Perhaps handing her a pack of Smarties was overkill because apparently, it has enough sugar to wire her longer than the five-minute drive home.
No slower than Steve can lock the front door, Penelope dumps the contents of her bag on the floor. A bouquet of candy wrappers, big and small, enough to last her months if she’s patient.
“You can have five more pieces tonight.”
Penelope smirks at Steve before he’s even finished. “Ten?”
“Six. But you have to brush your teeth for twice as long.” Before she can rebuttal he shakes his head. “Final offer.”
“Fine,” she huffs, combing through her pile. She sorts them into categories while Steve prepares her bath. It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown is already on– Steve has a bad habit of forgetting to turn the TV off when he leaves– but you find the remote when Penelope asks you to turn the volume up.
“You can have these,” she announces, pushing a chunk of her goodies toward you. It’s mostly things she doesn’t like: twizzlers and dark chocolate and anything with peanuts. But she did sneak in one of your favorites you’d mentioned earlier that night. She really is a sweetheart.
“Thank you, Penelope. That’s very nice of you.”
“These are for Daddy,” she points to a second pile, smacking loudly on the gummy bear she just decapitated. “He loves chocolate but he got a cavity once because he ate too much.”
“Are you talking about me?” Steve hollers, clambering down the stairs two at a time.
“No?” Penelope giggles.
His hands snap to his hips once he treks into the living room. “Alright, it’s bath time then bedtime Miss Dorothy.”
Penelope looks utterly betrayed. She’s only eaten three things and– “It’s not even late yet,” she whines.
He pretends to check his watch, “It is.”
It’s not but she can’t tell time yet.
“Can we watch Oz, Daddy, please? There’s no school tomorrow, ‘member?”
“We watched it last night, peanut. Why don’t we watch a Halloween movie?”
Peanut, pumpkin, princess, he calls her all sorts of cute things. Is it wrong to wish he called you cute things too?
“I wanna watch Oz. I’m Dorothy so we have to.” She drags out the last syllable until she runs out of breath.
Penelope’s over-tired. Delirious and whiny and easily hysterical when she doesn’t get her way. And it’s not that Steve thinks he should give in when she’s like this, he’s just tired too. And you’re here and it’s the weekend so what will one movie really do? He can guarantee she’ll fall asleep during it anyway.
“Okay. Only if you’re super-duper fast in the bath.”
She shouts and whizzes upstairs.
Steve diverts his attention to you, “You wanna stay? I can make popcorn.”
Of course, you’d love to stay, and not just for the promise of popcorn, but you’re afraid if you do, you’ll never want to leave.
“Are you sure?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?” He makes a face– a ridiculously lovely one. “Go sit. We’ll be quick.”
They aren’t quick but there are photo albums on the coffee table that you’re happy to look through in the meantime. You flick through beats of their life like stills of a movie. There are baby photos, school pictures, movie stubs, plane tickets, and several people you don’t know the names of. It’s weird– getting snippets of things about them you had no idea of. You’re filling the gaps as you go.
Penelope returns first, frolicking her way to the entertainment center in fresh pajamas. She’s on a mission by the looks of it, making a mess of the VHS collection in the cabinet. By the time Steve arrives, most of the films are splayed across the carpet.
“Oz is already in, silly goose. We watched it yesterday remember?”
Penelope drops the tape in her hands, “Oh.”
Steve hunches over her, slotting the films away one by one. She doesn’t help much, but he doesn’t seem to mind.
Penelope clambers onto the couch beside you and Steve beside her. It’s a long sectional, enough room for several others. But Penelope scoots in right beside you so you're hip to hip. And Steve makes himself comfortable more in the middle cushion than the farthest.
His onesie has been traded for sweats and his whiskers scrubbed away– though a faded, gray smear crosses his jawline. You consider telling him, or licking your thumb and scratching it away yourself, but it makes you feel less weird to be the only one still in costume so you let it stay.
“I like these,” you tug the cotton pant leg of Penelope’s outfit. It’s a matching set, frilly and plaid with a black cat stamped to the torso.
She tucks her lower lip away sheepishly and pushes her crown into your shoulder. Her hair's damp, soaking your sleeve cold, but you fawn at the affection more than anything.
“Did you find that picture? From her first birthday? I think it’s in there.” Steve gestures toward the closed album in your lap with the remote but remains glued to the TV.
“No, I didn’t finish looking.”
“I wanna see,” Penelope arches over your legs, prying the book open.
Steve rewinds the film to the start and pauses it so he can look too.
You thumb the plastic sheet over a recent image of Penelope scrunching her nose at the camera, a riot of stickers across her face.
“RoRo!” She taps the photo beside it. It’s a haphazard blur, most likely captured by Penelope; you make out the shape of Steve first, then the less angular, slightly shorter person– a woman, RoRo. You think Penelope’s mentioned her before but nothing about the picture rings any bells.
“Mhmm. That’s Robin. Remember this was at the airport?”
“Is that when we got pizza?”
“Yeah!” Steve rubs her arm. “You have a good memory.”
You turn the page, revealing a set of grainy, blue-tinted photos from the same roll of film. Steve looks young for his age now, but he looked like a baby then. Strangely though when there’s an actual infant in his arms. He was thinner then but even softer in the face. Not unhappy, per se, but maybe missing a lightness he has now.
“This was on my twenty-third birthday,” he explains. “Look how little you were!”
“Did I eat cake?”
“No, you were too young, baby.” He chuckles, pointing to another photo. “You tried a banana for the first time in this one.”
“I like bananas.”
“You didn’t used to.”
Steve and Penelope share slices of their pasts fondly. You study the photos, compare these reflections to the people you find yourself next to. There’s an unexpected pinch in your chest– not getting the chance to know these versions of them, it makes you sad. But it’s a happy sort of sad. You’re grateful to know them now.
Penelope begs to flip through another album but Steve decides it’ll be too late to finish The Wizard of Oz if they do. His true reluctance stems from how emotional the first one made him– though you’ll pretend not to notice for his sake.
Steve bets Penelope an extra Reeses that she’ll fall asleep by the time Dorothy meets the scarecrow. It’s unfair, really. You tell Penelope not to pinky promise it but she does. And she loses awfully, yawning within five minutes and startling herself awake within ten. You scoff when Steve starts carding through her hair– her guaranteed snooze switch. It’s evil and you tell him so. So of course, that finishes her off long before Scarecrow makes an appearance; she curls into Steve’s side and digs a heel into yours. Poor girl never stood a chance.
“She had a lot of fun tonight,” Steve utters. It’s alarming at first, how his voice eclipses the TV like there isn’t a child snoring against his stomach. But she doesn’t stir. He knows she won’t.
“Did you?” You ask, skating between a whisper and not.
���Very much. You?”
“Mhmm. Loads,” you answer without hesitation. It’s possibly the easiest question anyone’s ever asked you. “I think Penelope’s right.”
He quirks an eyebrow against the front of the couch. His cheek is sinking further into the cotton like he might fall asleep.
“We should go trick-or-treating tomorrow too.”
His lips wane into a soft smile. If he wasn’t so drained he might laugh too. “What should we be? Penelope has a strict no-repeat costume rule.”
You hum, scraping your memory for the best costumes you’d seen. There were Power Rangers and Ghostbusters and several Batmen with their Catwomen. But the image of one young family sticks out the most in your mind. A young pair of parents with their son and daughter decked in moody black and white.
“Addams family?”
“Who’s who?”
“She’s Wednesday. Obviously.”
Steve chuckles, accidentally too loud and Penelope twitches against his thigh. He draws her against his chest readily and strokes her spine with the back of his hand. “Obviously,” he whispers.
“You’re Morticia and I’m Gomez, though.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah. She’s tall and pretty. Strong jawline, kinda sassy. I think you’ll make it work.”
You’re flirting. You know you are as soon as you say it. And you don’t mean to, it just happens; the words come intuitively as blinking. Your brain does all sorts of crazy things around Steve.
“You think I’m pretty?” He’s smiling hard. You can’t tell if he’s serious or not.
“Pretty sassy, yeah,” you deflect. It’s a safer truth than admitting you do think he’s pretty.
He rolls his eyes. “My mom says Nell gets her attitude from me. Says it’s payback for how I was as a child.”
You gawk emphatically. “Were you a bad kid Steve Harrington?”
“I wasn’t bad– just needed attention I think.”
You hum. It’s a little surprising since you know Steve’s an only child to wealthier parents. You’d pegged him to be spoiled in both money and attention.
“Are you close with your parents?”
He shakes his head, “Not really. Talk every now and then.”
“Sorry.”
“Don’t be. I came to terms with it a while ago. Even more after she was born.” He skims his lips against Penelope’s head. “I can’t imagine not being in her life. You know, not really knowing her? Not knowing her favorite things or when she’s hurting or what she’s up to every second of the day. I don’t think that’ll ever change.”
“She’ll be so grateful to have that kind of relationship when she’s older.”
“Yeah, maybe. Like way older.” His shoulders droop as he sighs, “She already thinks I’m smothering her. Wouldn’t hold my hand yesterday because she’s ‘too big’ she said.”
“Already?” You laugh.
“I know!” He groans. “I almost cried.”
“She loves you. Kids just show it in strange ways.”
“Yeah… She forced me to hold a slug last week.”
“You held it?”
“I had to! She was so excited to give it to me.”
“Aww. You’re a good dad.”
Steve's eyes caper down and his cheeks pinken. “I’m trying to be.”
Apart from the movie and an occasional sleep sigh from Penelope, silence swallows the room. It’s a comfortable silence; the kind you only get around people you’ve known forever; It feels like you’ve known Steve your entire life. You have to remind yourself it’s only been a few months. Remind yourself this is the first time you’ve ever even hung out.
You find yourself drifting to the future. A future, with Steve and Penelope. Vacations and school events and hiking trips and movie nights and so much more. It’s silly. It makes your heart want to rip itself from your chest.
Steve clears his throat. Your fantasy is only partially dissolved. “I’m gonna take her upstairs. Put her to bed.”
You lean forward and press into your knees, gearing to stand. “Okay. I should get going. It’s late.”
“Stay for a minute. I’ll walk you out.”
You have no reason to decline but even if you did, you aren’t sure you would be able to. Saying no to Steve is as hard as saying no to Penelope. They have the same puppy-dog eyes– brown and soft as sun-baked clay. That must be it.
Steve strains to stand with the added weight. He’s strong but Penelope’s four now and having growth spurts like there’s a race to be the tallest kid in school. She clings to him instinctually, slotting her face into his neck like it was sculpted specifically to be her pillow. Her gangly legs sway against his thighs as he slowly climbs the stairs and disappears onto the landing.
You don’t notice Steve’s return. He’s much quieter than before, taking softer steps and more calculated movements. He doesn’t have the buffer of his body heat to soothe Penelope back to sleep if she wakes. The palm on your shoulder startles you.
He whispers an apology from behind the couch, voice sweet and buttery as caramel. You let him guide you the short distance to the front door– expecting it to end there– but he presses into a pair of laced sneakers thrown beside the entry table.
The night’s chill is jolting, even in your coat. It’s easy to forget the months are slipping into winter when Steve’s around. He radiates warmth, not just in sun-kissed skin and honeyed eyes, but in his tone and his touches and every aspect of his spirit. And it bleeds like a fire. Brushes your cheeks like flames and stirs perpetually in your belly like magma.
He walks you the entire length of his driveway to your car. Probably would’ve opened the door for you if you didn’t beat him to it.
“Thank you for inviting me Steve,” you say, lingering in the threshold of your open door.
“Thank you for coming. I’m really happy you came. So is Penelope.”
“As much as I am looking forward to The Addams Family next year, we should plan something… maybe a little sooner?”
“Mmm. Let me check my schedule first,” he teases, rapping his fingers against the roof of your car.
“Whatever, boss-man.”
You still don’t get in. There’s a stretch of silence, not awkward, just a placeholder for when the right words come. And they don’t. Not tonight anyway. You could hug him? Peck his cheek? Pat his back as he might yours?
You settle for a safe and simple tight-lipped smile. He appreciates it just the same.
“See you Friday?” He asks.
“See you then.”
Steve guides the door closed after you settle in. He waits until your taillights have completely fizzled out in the shadows of his street to stroll back up to his house.
He thinks of you as he locks the front door and again as he finds your hat on the sectional and a third time as he slips under his sheets. Steve isn’t sure what to do. He feels sick. His heart is hammering and his gut twists itself in knots like it does when he’s afraid. He hasn’t quite figured out what about you is so scary but how can he possibly wait until Friday to find out?
#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington fluff#dad steve harrington#steve harrington#coworker steve harrington#stranger things fic#stranger things#the shape of family#skeltnwrites#my work
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Day 4: market day
Masterlist flufftober 🎃
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You've heard a lot of people say that the honeymoon period only lasts the first few weeks of marriage and that after that things can start to get complicated. But the rule didn’t seem to apply to you.
Maybe it was because you two were young and enthusiastic, because you were too busy missing him to think about arguing, or maybe it was just that you really were made for each other.
You often tried to steal as much time as possible from your husband’s demanding job because being an FBI agent often took him away from you, and sometimes having a few domestic moments was all you both desired.
Grocery shopping was one of those activities that really made you feel like a married couple, and it saved you many trips to the store for food.
“Which do you prefer? Soy or almond milk?”
“Soy has phytoestrogens and more health benefits in moderate amounts. Almond is for people looking to maintain weight, and although it’s healthy, it’s low in protein.”
“Soy, got it,” you said with a small smile at his intellectual response.
Every time it was grocery shopping day, your job was always to push the cart and grab an item or two within reach, but most of the time, Spencer was the one in charge of selecting your groceries. After all, he had a pretty extensive knowledge of the benefits of each food. He always wanted to take care of you, and since he was often away, one way he could do that was by ensuring you were well-nourished.
“Look, I found some tea,” he announced happily, making you look away from the yogurt section in the fridge to pay attention. “Lavender, passionflower, valerian…”
“For your insomnia?”
“Mhm,” he hummed, dropping the boxes into the cart “And some mint and lemon for you.”
“You know me so well,” you smiled sweetly, leaning on the plastic handle, letting him gently caress your cheek.
You two had known each other for so many years that there were details about each other you knew by instinct. You knew his favorite brand of coffee, how he liked it with a specific number of sugar spoons, that you needed to buy him two sets of socks because he always liked mismatched ones, and you knew the exact spot on his head to stroke to help him fall back asleep after a nightmare. He knew you hated wearing shoes indoors, that you had a specific way of sleeping, and that you hated the smell of cinnamon. There were so many things you did as if they were second nature that it seemed impossible to list them all.
The truth is, people at Spencer’s work were quite surprised to find out that not only did he have a girlfriend, but that you were getting married. The event was private, very intimate, and not at all pretentious because that wasn’t your style.
You both had no problem moving into a new, slightly more spacious apartment, now that everything was doubled. But you were managing it quite well, to be honest.
You continued strolling through the grocery store, staying close to your husband, and then remembered you needed some bread. You pushed the cart over and stood next to a woman who seemed to be in a dilemma, staring at two loaves of bread as if trying to analyze which was better.
“The best one is that one,” you said, hoping not to make her uncomfortable. She looked at you confused, so you decided to speak again. “It has less sugar and the necessary carbs for good nutrition. There’s a study about it; it’s true.”
“Oh, sweetie, I wasn’t looking for the healthiest, just the one with the best quantity and price. It’s for my kids. Those children could eat an entire loaf in a day, and I can’t afford that.”
You laughed honestly and gave her a look of understanding. She was a bit older than you but not old enough to be considered elderly.
“I think you’re right.”
“I love my kids, but I won’t lie… sometimes they drive me crazy,” she confessed, and you both laughed again.
“Darling, do you want me to make pasta for you this week? Rossi taught me a recipe that…”
He trailed off when he noticed you had company, and for some reason, he suddenly felt shy.
“That’s fine, love. We can eat whatever you want,” you replied kindly. “I already have something to go with it.”
You winked at him when he noticed the wine you had tossed into the cart, and then he smiled and went off in search of the necessary ingredients.
“Your boyfriend?”
“Husband,” you corrected her. There was a strange pride in saying that.
“Husband! Oh, that’s so sweet. How long have you been married?”
“We’ll be married for four months next week.”
“Young love, so beautiful,” she sighed, as if nostalgic for a time that now seemed too far away. “And he helps you with the shopping?”
“I help him, actually,” you laughed. “He’s the one who selects everything. Before we got married, I had the worst eating habits, and he hated that. So we try to eat better now.”
“Marriages are so different now,” she said, and upon hearing that, you expected to endure a conservative speech and internally dreaded it. “My husband never joins me for things like this; he’s not even interested. In this and in much more, to be honest. And it’s nice to see that girls nowadays can have these kinds of relationships. You know, where they’re supported.”
Somehow, that touched your heart, and suddenly you wished you could hug the woman, but you held back. Then, you looked over at Spencer. He was in the vegetable section, apparently comparing two bags of spinach. You could recognize him in a crowd without a doubt, with his slouched posture, his messy hair (freshly cut, by the way), and his peculiar formal attire.
You had always appreciated having the man in your life, even when you didn’t have a romantic relationship, but you had never stopped to think how lucky you were that he had decided to love you.
“I’m glad too,” you said in what was barely a whisper.
You didn’t say anything else. The woman said her goodbyes kindly, and you just smiled at her, too busy gazing at the man with loving eyes. You stood there watching him, and when he approached, he couldn’t help but notice your strange expression.
“What’s up?”
“Nothing. I just had a very revealing conversation with that woman.”
“Huh, yeah?” he hummed, dropping a collection of items into the shopping cart “And what was it about?”
“About you,” you answered casually, lifting your hands to place them on his chest and then sliding them to his cheeks “Talking to her reminded me that you’re the best husband in the world.”
Carefully and affectionately, you stood on your tiptoes and planted a loud kiss on him. Spencer laughed as his cheeks blushed, returning the favor with a gentle kiss on your forehead.
“I don’t know if I am, but I try.”
“And that’s why I love you,” you confessed sweetly.
And then, it was Spencer who felt lucky.
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