#covid scenes made me a little tearful

[smileysuh]

sapiosexual

🌙 staring. Seungcheol x afab!Reader 

🔮 preview. “You’re a beautiful, bright, young woman, and you’re agreeing to be a companion to some middle aged psych nut who hardly has enough time for you-” you both laugh a little at the way he refers to himself, “compensation is a must.”

cw/ tw. daddy kink/issues, size/shoulder/back kink, contractual relationship, unspecified age difference, unprotected sex, choking, semi bondage, multiple sex scenes, fingering, squirting, oral (m/f receiving), baby oil massage, praise, dirty talk, hair pulling, overstim, dacryphilia, slight orgasm denial, hand kink, etc... I pet names. his: daddy. hers: gorgeous, angel, darling, my love, pretty girl, etc...

👹 rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 18.6k

🍭 aus. psychologist au, non idol au, sugar daddy au, aged up/soft dom cheol, etc...

☀️ mlist + an. dont fuck your psychologist, fuck a psychologist... and try to get a cheque while you do it 👀 (sapiosexual: the attraction to intelligence and broad af shoulders)

1: Wednesday

“I’m here to meet someone- under the name Choi?”

The hostess nods politely. “Mister Choi has been expecting you, right this way.”

Your heart lurches in your chest at her words. While it makes sense that the man you’re meeting for your date had let the host know he’d have a plus one joining him, there’s something in the woman’s diction that suggests a certain kind of familiarity. 

The restaurant you’re in is an expensive one, and the previous man you’d met through the online sugar dating website had made something of a show of being a part owner of a place such as this, treating the staff in a way that demanded obedience- 

You really hope, for everyone’s sake, that the person you’re meeting tonight is much kinder than the last.

The hostess takes you through the main dining section of the establishment and to a more secluded area, where she motions with a hand to the one occupied table by the windows that overlook the city. 

“Your server will come by for your drink order shortly,” she tells you, giving you a quick nod and something of a knowing smile before she returns to her post, allowing you to make the final distance to the table yourself.

The man sitting with his back to you hasn’t turned around, and you take a moment to collect yourself, swallowing thickly. Your eyes scan over his broad shoulders, taking in the pretty tweed suit, the colour of charcoal, and neatly styled black hair. 

You take a deep breath and begin forward.

“Sorry I’m late,” you apologize as you reach the man you’ve been in contact with just under a week- “you know how traffic can be-”

Your words feel jumbled in your mouth as Mr. Choi stands to greet you- because, although you’d been expecting a handsome man, you hadn’t been expecting him to be godlike-

The photos he’d had on the sugar dating site had been ten out of tens, but the man in front of you is a scale breaker. 

He’s even broader up close, and tall too- looking down at you with an amused expression, eyes practically twinkling-

“It’s alright,” he tells you smoothly, voice sexier than you could have ever imagined, “I’m glad you’re here now.”

“Me too,” you breathe, blinking up at him, etching his angelic features into your brain-

“You look beautiful,” Mr. Choi says, taking in the dress you’d spent three hours picking out-

His eyes don’t linger anywhere in particular, they’re quick to move back up to your face, and part of you almost wishes he’d stared at your chest just a little longer-

“Thank you,” you say, remembering you’ve yet to respond to his compliment.

“Would you like to sit?” he asks next, and you realize you’ve been staring too long, quickly tearing your gaze from him to give a curt nod. 

The two of you take your seats, and you adjust in your chair, letting out a shaky laugh. “I’m also sorry if I’m a little awkward- I feel like my social skills took a hit during the pandemic.” 

The man in front of you nods. “That’s understandable. The aftereffects of global isolation during covid is something that’s going to be studied by psychologists in depth in the coming years. You’re not alone in your feelings, believe me.”

You blink, thinking through his words. “Thank you-” you stutter, “for the reassurance, I mean.”

“Of course,” he nods again. “I think you’ll find I can be very reassuring, if need be.” 

Your skin tingles, and you can’t believe that you’d nearly let your best friend talk you out of this date.

‘Psychologists can be dangerous!’ Seungkwan had insisted, ‘One moment you think he’s your boyfriend, the next he’s hypnotized you to cover up a murder-’

You’d told him to stop rewatching Hannibal.

But you have to admit… Mr. Choi, or Seungcheol, as he’d called himself when he’d first messaged you, he definitely looks like Hannibal. 

Broad, handsome, tweed suit and all-

“I can see you’re thinking hard about something,” the man sitting across from you notes.

“Sorry, I was just-” you bite at your lip, “was just thinking that you’re probably really good at your job.”

His brows raise at this, and then he’s smiling, “Oh?”

“Yeah, you erm- you have a really calming voice and presence, and I mean- obviously you know what you’re talking about-”

“Are you in the market for a psychologist?” 

“No-” you answer quickly, “I mean, I don’t think so- that’s not why I matched with you at least.” 

The amused smile remains on his face, and it’s making it hard for you to look at him- 

He keeps his gaze so fixed on you, and he exudes confidence on top of the calm- 

Confidence that’s making your heart thump louder and louder in your chest-

“Hello, Mr. Choi,” the arrival of your waiter breaks the building tension you’re feeling. The question “How has your evening been so far?” confirms that Seungcheol knows the staff, and the pleasant way in which he responds tells you that you’re on a date with a good man. 

After a brief back and forth, Mr. Choi orders himself an Old Fashioned, and you ask for a gin and tonic.

Then, you’re once more alone with the man whose gaze is enough to have your pussy clenching with interest-

“I saw you were new to the site,” Seungcheol notes, and you can’t believe he’d bothered to look for that information on your profile, let alone remember it. “How’s your experience been so far?”

You take a moment to collect your thoughts before responding. “If I’m being honest, I talked to one person for a while, and when we met, he turned out to be- just- not a good person. So when you favourited me, and I thought you looked nice, I told myself it would be better to meet up in person without too much back and forth first.” 

“That sounds logical,” he agrees. “I’m sorry your first experience wasn’t what you thought it would be, but there is a silver lining, you’re here now.” 

“I’m here now,” you echo with a smile, and the waiter returns with your beverages.

Seungcheol had invited you for drinks and dessert. Seungkwan had insisted that meant drinks and sex, but your view of things is proved to be correct when Mr. Choi orders the ‘dessert tasting menu’ and the waiter scurries off again. 

“Should we make a toast?” you ask, allowing your eyes to trail over Seungcheol’s handsome face- his strong brow and pretty lips-

“We should,” he confirms, grabbing his glass and lifting it, “what would you like to toast to?”

“Being here now.”

“To being here now.” Seungcheol allows the lip of his glass to clink gently against your own before bringing it to his mouth, and you each drink to the moment.

“So,” you say when you set your cup down, “why drinks and dessert instead of dinner?”

“Dinners can be long, and full of expectations,” he tells you. “Drinks and dessert allows you to leave earlier, if you’d like to.”

“You seem like the kind of man who has everything figured out,” you muse.

The side of his mouth quirks into a charming half smile, and he leans forward slightly in his chair, assessing you with dark eyes- “Does that excite you?”

“Yes-” the word slips out before you can stop it.

The man in front of you leans back, satisfied. 

“What, exactly, are you looking for right now?” he prompts. “Your bio was… somewhat vague.”

“I guess-” you take a sip of your drink. “I guess it depends on who it is.”

“How about you start by telling me your thought process behind creating an account,” he suggests.

You’re momentarily distracted by the way his thumb rubs up and down the side of his cup- dragging through droplets of condensation gathered on the glass-

“My best friend loves Marilyn Monroe,” you find yourself saying.

This is clearly not the answer Seungcheol had expected, as he quirks that inquisitive brow of his at your words, and you’re quick to continue. 

“His favourite movie of hers is Gentlemen Prefer Blondes- and I’m not kidding, he’s been bleaching his hair since the tenth grade because of it- and there’s this quote- something like- ‘it’s just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as a poor man.’ And I just sort of thought- I’m tired of putting a lot into relationships with people who give nearly nothing in return. At least with something like this- I’d be guaranteed something- you know?”

“It sounds like you’ve spent a lot of your life trying to make other people happy,” he notes smoothly. “I can understand why you’d want to be on the receiving end. Everyone deserves reciprocation.” 

He pauses, swirling his glass, but you can tell there’s something else on his mind, and you wait on the edge of your seat for more.

“From what you’ve said,” his thumb runs up the glass again, “it sounds to me like you’re looking for a contractual type of situation, moreso than a verbal agreement. Something with that added stability.”

“That’s correct,” you nod.

The last man hadn’t ever brought up contracts or boundaries or any of the things that are mentioned when you’d looked up what sugar babying entails. 

You’re enthralled by the professional way Mr. Choi is handling himself, and you’re enjoying his crystal clear communication.

“What-” you lick your lips, “what are you looking for?” 

“As you know, I’m a psychologist,” he states. “The job comes with a lot of responsibility. I take care of a number of people with quite severe conditions, and unfortunately, regardless of my intentions, this means I’ve had less time and energy to give to people in my own life.”

He pauses to take a breath and a sip of his whisky before continuing.

“I had a fiance for a time, but it became clear to me that she wanted a child. At the time, I wasn't ready to give up my work to be present in the way a developing mind would need. I’ve been looking for a sugar baby who would understand my lifestyle. Someone to meet with once or twice a week, who would provide happy company and the emotional closeness all human beings desperately need, without some of the… expectations that traditional relationships have. Does this sound like something that could interest you?”

You find yourself quickly nodding.

“Good,” he smiles warmly at you. “I’d love to explore the exact details of a contract over drinks, and we can choose a day to do that, but for now, if you don’t mind, I think I’d like to switch the topic and focus on you a little more.”

“On me?” you blink- 

Mr. Choi’s grin widens, and the warmth meets his eyes. “Yes, you. I think it’s safe to say we’re both physically attracted to each other, but I want to know more about who you are, inside that pretty body of yours.”

You can feel your skin heating from his compliment, and you avert your gaze, grabbing at your drink to take a sip and cool yourself. “What do you want to know?”

“Let’s start with the things that make you happiest.”

2: Thursday

“Look who finally decided to answer,” your best friend sighs loudly when you put him on speaker, and you can imagine his classic Seungkwan eye roll.

“I was sleeping,” you tell him, which only succeeds in earning you a scoff.

“And I have been waiting for details about your date since last night!” 

“I sent you a text saying it was good!”

“And then you put your phone on silent you whore!” your best friend screams, making you laugh at his antics- then his voice dips. “Did you fuck him?” 

“No, of course not-”

“You sound like you’re lying.”

“I’m not, I promise-” you roll onto your back and look up at your ceiling, letting out a breath. “Drinks and dessert literally meant drinks and dessert.” 

“Did he at least- I don’t know, feed you some of the dessert?”

“No.” 

“Oh.” The line is quiet for a moment. “Well that’s anti-climactic.”

You laugh. “First you wanted me going on dates with sugar daddies, then you were weird about Seungcheol, now you’re wishing I had fucked him-” 

“Well- did you enjoy yourself?”

“Yes.”

“Was he hot?”

You groan. “So fucking hot you don’t even know-” 

“Then I do wish you’d fucked him- you’re my best friend, and you deserve to get laid,” Seungkwan says plainly. “Also- I was only weird about this Seungcheol guy because he’s a therapist-”

“Psychologist.”

“Same thing- the point is, he’s a guy with power and a brain- that can be a deadly combination.” 

“I thought I told you to stop watching Hannibal,” you smile, enjoying the way Seungkwan turns everything into life or death.

He scoffs at your words, disregarding them. “So tell me about your date.”

“Like I said, it was good. I got there, we ordered drinks, he’s obviously like- super smart. We talked a little bit about why we’re on the site-”

“Why is he on the site? If he’s hot, rich, and smart?” Seungkwan asks. “Shouldn’t he be with- I don’t know… someone his own age? How old was he again?”

“Mid to late thirties- and there’s a reason for it actually. He mentioned a fiance who wanted kids- I think women ‘his age’ are all looking for a family, but he’s very… invested in his work,” you explain.

 “Oh. Huh.” You listen to the cogs in Seungkwan’s brain turning. “So- I guess he just wants a sugar baby to work around his busy schedule?”

“He’s looking for a companion-” you say, “but, you know, someone who can handle the fact that his work comes first.” 

“Right.” A beat, then; “So did you guys talk money?” 

“Seungkwan!”

“What!?” he yells back. “Quit beating around the bush!” 

“He didn’t just- whip a wad of cash out and give it to me,” you laugh. “He paid for everything of course, and we agreed to discuss a contract over drinks-”

“When?”

“Actually-” you look down at your phone, which has just buzzed, scanning the new text. “Coincidently, he’s texting me now.”

“Oooh! What’s he saying?!” 

“He said, ‘I really enjoyed your company last night. Would you like to join me for drinks tomorrow at eight?’” 

“Wow, this dude works fast- are you sure you didn’t suck him off or anything?”

“Seungkwan!” 

“I just mean- two dates in three days- this is fast.”

“Yeah well,” you shrug while texting out a confirmation response for Seungcheol, “if you’d seen Mr. Choi in person, you’d be hoping things go fast too.”

“Is he really that sexy? This isn’t just- your old man kink?”

“I dont have an old man kink-”

“Sure you don’t.”

You groan. “Seungkwan, just trust me. This man-” you swallow thickly, “he could choke me out- and I’d say thank you daddy.”

“Right, but let’s hope he doesn’t though.” 

3: Friday

Part of you isn’t surprised that Seungcheol has a study in his home, but another part of you wonders if this man is really someone you should be entertaining, with his shelves of psychology texts and autobiographies written by renowned people in his field- and the framed degrees and papers of certification-

Seungcheol is the real deal; it’s clear as day and reflected in his home.

He gives you a tour of the main floor, moving from the study to the dining room, and despite your ardent attempt at listening- it’s hard to focus. 

If he’d been godlike in the charcoal tweed suit when you’d first met him- well, you don’t even know how to describe how well he fits into a plain white dress shirt, sleeves rolled up to expose strong, bulky forearms- and then there’s the way the material stretches over his deliciously broad shoulders every time he turns his back to you-

“Now that I’ve given you a small tour, why don’t you take a seat,” he says as you enter his kitchen. “And I’ll grab us drinks. What are you feeling? Wine, water, beer, champagne-”

“Whatever you think is best,” you tell him, a little overwhelmed by the effect his home is having on you- 

The effect he is having on you. 

“I think I’d like to give you champagne,” he says, turning his back to you to open his fridge.

You find yourself nearly drooling at the brief moments you’re able to gawk at his shoulders again- and when he faces you, your eyes immediately zero in on his hands as they begin to fiddle with the bottle-

“Has anyone ever talked you through opening a bottle of champagne before?” he asks.

Your eyes meet briefly and you feel your skin heat when you admit, “not really- is there a specific way to do it?”

“I’m not sure if there’s one specific way,” Seungcheol chuckles a little, looking down at his task. “At ceremonies, sometimes they’ll use a sword and knock the top of the neck clean off- but for our purposes, and to avoid breaking anything with the cork if it shoots off, I prefer utilizing the cork cage,” he runs his fingers across the metal contraption on top of the bottle. “The trick is to unwind it most of the way, but keep it on so when you manuever the cork up-” his thumb runs along the seem, working at it- “it pops,” there’s a loud sound, “but it gets caught by the cork cage, and then, both are easily removed.”

He’d done the motion so professionally- a man who’s opened many a champagne bottle in his time. 

Seungcheol seems to be an expert of everything - a true wealth of knowledge - and it’s one of the sexiest things you’ve ever experienced. 

You watch him pour two glasses of the bubbly liquid, and then he gingerly slides one across the marble island countertop, “I think you’ll enjoy this.”

He watches you with an amused expression while you raise the champagne to your lips, and when your eyes widen at the taste, he grins.

“It’s really good,” you say, toying with the stem of your glass. 

Now it’s your turn to watch him take a sip- and you’re blown away by how sexy he can be while simply drinking- his adam’s apple bobbing-

You wanna lick his neck.

You wanna lick his neck so bad-

“Should we get down to business?” he asks.

You wanna get down on something- and it’s not business. 

“Er- yes, we should,” you agree, shifting the way you’re seated on the bar stool at his counter-

Your panties are sticking to your core and it’s a little uncomfortable- 

You have no idea how this night is going to pan out, no idea if you’ll actually end up in his bed- so you’ve worn a beautiful, silky, matching set- its one drawback is the way the material sticks to  you when you’re even slightly aroused- and you’ve been aroused since the moment Seungcheol opened the door to his home and invited you in.

“Since this is a contract we’re making together, I held myself back from writing one up,” he explains. “I was thinking we could discuss it verbally, and I’ll write up a copy of what we’ve talked about after you go home tonight-” 

You feel your expression fall a little and Seungcheol pauses, expert eyes assessing you. 

“Is something wrong?” he asks.

“No,” you assure him, swallowing thickly and averting your gaze, “that sounds like a good idea.”

There are a few more moments of silence, and then Seungcheol rests both hands on the countertop, leaning forward, voice dipping when he says, “Darling, as much as I’d love for you to stay over tonight, I promised myself I wouldn’t fuck you until the third date.” 

Your skin feels electrified, and you gawk at the gorgeous man, who looks down at you with an amused grin.

You nearly shock yourself when the words “why not?” tumble past your lips, and his affectionate smile widens at your question.

“We’ve hardly discussed expectations,” he answers smoothly. “It would be… unwise for me to skip those important steps, to give you time to consider your options.”

“My options?”

“I am older than you,” he points out, “and there’s still a chance you might decide you want someone who can give you more of his time. I want you to be sure about all of this.”

“I am sure,” you insist.

“You think you are,” he muses, bringing his champagne to his lips, “but until you see a finalized document, you shouldn’t be agreeing to anything.”

“You won’t hurt me-” you tell him, “I trust you.”

“Although we only just met,” he points out. “If you trust me at all, trust in this process, okay, Sweetheart?”

You swallow any words of insistence that threaten to bubble up out of you, nodding and taking a sip of your own drink.

“So,” he lets out a sigh, “we discussed a few of my expectations when we first met, do you remember what they were?”

“You were looking for a companion of sorts, who could manage you being at work frequently,” you respond, feeling pleased when he nods and smiles at you. “Someone to meet up with once or twice a week.”

“Very good, Angel,” he praises you. “While it’s implied, I’d like to solidify what you might call a key condition.”

You’re practically on the edge of your seat, waiting for him to continue, your interest piqued.

“Any contract you’d sign would come with a loyalty clause.” He pauses for a moment, eyes searching your own. “Do you understand what that entails?”

“I think so,” you nod. “It would be an agreement that while I’m seeing you, I wouldn’t be entertaining anyone else. We’d be exclusive.”

“That’s my smart girl,” he smiles. “Even though I don’t have much time for you, I’d provide for you to live comfortably when I’m not around, in the hopes that, when we are together, we’re both committed to making the best of it.” 

You love the way that sounds.

“Which brings me to my next point,” he continues, “monthly allowances. I’ll cover your food, rent, utilities- anything you need, and provide extra spending money for clothing, jewelry, etcetera.” 

“Wow, that’s-” you feel your eyes widening, “that’s very generous of you.”

“It’s really not,” he insists. “You’re a beautiful, bright, young woman, and you’re agreeing to be a companion to some middle aged psych nut who hardly has enough time for you-” you both laugh a little at the way he refers to himself, “compensation is a must.”

You have to stop yourself from happily chirping an ‘if you say so daddy’ at the man that is so close to becoming everything you’ve ever wanted for yourself-

“On top of our one-on-one interactions,” Seungcheol says, “I’d also like for you to accompany me to professional events, but I’d need you to be discreet. On top of a loyalty clause, I might have you sign a nondisclosure act- how does that sound to you?”

You consider it for a moment. “I’m not the type to go tell people about my personal life- and other than my best friend, no one even knows I was on the sugar site-”

“Your friend who loves Marilyn Monroe and bleaches his hair?” Seungcheol asks with an amused expression.

“You remembered-” you laugh, heart warming to know how many details he’s held onto in regard to your first meeting.

“The NDA can exclude your close friend, we all need a confidant.”

“Thank you,” you swallow, “I think- if it allows me to talk to Seungkwan, signing a NDA would be okay.”

“Perfect,” Seungcheol nods, drinking the last of his champagne. “We’ve covered a few of the most important parts of an agreement, so I think maybe now is a good time to grab another important document that I need you to look over.”

“Oh?”

“Stay here for a moment, I’ll be right back,” Seungcheol assures you, flashing you a quick wink before exiting the kitchen.

It’s almost torturous to be alone anywhere in Seungcheol’s home without him, and part of you is inclined to follow him around like a lost, needy puppy-

You finish your drink while you wait, taking breaths to calm yourself, afterall, he’d said he wouldn’t be fucking you tonight- therefore, there’s not much for you to worry about.

Seungcheol returns shortly, holding a dark leather file folder, which he offers to you.

“What’s this?” you ask, not wanting to open it without being prompted to- but your curiosity is as high as ever.

“Separate from our sugar agreement, this is a bdsm contract. It has a list of kinks and other things, as well as a section for you to fill out, detailing what you’re comfortable - and more importantly - what you’re uncomfortable with. I’d like you to take it home, look it over, and if you have any questions, let me know.”

“Right-” you stand up, holding the file folder to your chest-

Any words that you were thinking of saying disappear when you look up at Seungcheol, once more marveling at your size difference and how beautiful he is-

“You’re easily distractable,” he grins, pinching at your chin gently, “aren’t you, Angel?”

“Yes sir,” you mumble-

Easily dazed too.

“My driver will take you home now,” the (much too sexy) psychologist tells you. “His name is Seokmin, you’ll probably have to remind him to give you his number. He’ll be available to you from now on if you need to go anywhere.”

“You have a driver?” you blink- shocked at how he’s able to afford all of this-

You realize he must come from old money- and you’re appalled you hadn’t noticed it before.

He doesn’t carry himself in the way a man who’d made a name for himself would- he has an air of confidence- a confidence that runs deep and is backed up by family money.

“Yes, darling,” Seungcheol grins, “we have a driver.”

4: Saturday

You’ve always loved having movie night with your best friend, but tonight, he’s not interested in movies. Seungkwan is easily distractable - a little like you, you suppose - and when you’d arrived over an hour ago, he’d immediately insisted on knowing every detail about your experience with the man he now refers to as ‘Psych daddy.’

On top of being distractable, Seunkwan is easy to please, and you manage to avoid mentioning the BDSM contract for a good long while, instead focusing on Seungcheol’s hot driver, who Seungkwan finds on instagram within five minutes.

“No way- first Psych Daddy is a ten out of ten, and now his driver is hot too?” Seungkwan bellows while mad scrolling through Seokmin’s profile. “Are you sure we’re not in some weird porn dream? You’re not gonna get tag teamed are you?”

“Seungkwan!” you scream, gently smacking him across the shoulder in shock.

“We were both thinking it!” he insists, shoving you back.

“I’ll have you know that we were not both thinking it,” you state with just as much certainty. 

“But you mentioned how nice the guy was when he dropped you off last night and we called for like five minutes before you hung up on me to go to bed!”

“Yeah, in the context that Seungcheol is really nice to everyone that works for him, despite being-”

“One of the youngest, sexiest psych daddies in the city, yeah, yeah-” Seungkwan waves his hand, “Stop rubbing it in.”

“Have you been researching my boyfriend again?” you ask, thoroughly amused.

“Boyfriend?” Seunkwan eyes you up and down, sneering. “Is that what we call dom daddies now?” 

“If he makes you sign a loyalty clause and a NDA, I think I can call him whatever I want, can’t I?” you point out. “And you avoided my question- you’ve definitely been googling Cheol again.”

“Been googling myself to pictures of pysch daddy-” Seungkwan says suggestively before asking, “He made you sign an NDA?”

“Not yet,” you sigh, “and don’t worry, we’ve discussed it and it will exclude you- I can tell you anything I want to.”

“Shit, did you tell him my name? Do you think he’ll accept me as a patient if he knows I’m your best friend?”

“Since when do you need a psychologist?” you laugh.

“Uh,” Seungkwan’s brows raise, “Bestie, have you seen my life? I definitely need someone to confide in who knows what the fuck he’s talking about.”

“Ouch,” you touch your heart, pretending to be wounded. “Since when did you not like crack gremlin advice?”

“Since you put down your crack gremlin hat and became a sugar baby to a hot psychologist,” Seungkwan sighs, taking one last look at Seokmin’s grinning face before he puts his phone down and focuses entirely on you. “But go back a few steps and talk to me about this loyalty clause- psych daddy sends you home with a ton of papers to sign, huh?”

“More than you could imagine.”

Your best friend looks you up and down with suspicion, brow raising in a silent prompt for more info.

When you remain quiet, Seungkwan sighs. “Fine, don’t tell me,” but after a beat, he asks, “Was it a sex list or something?”

You’re always stunned by how intuitive your best friend can be.

Upon reading your reaction, Seungkwan’s eyes widen and he grabs at your arm, nearly jumping with excitement. “No way!” he yells in your ear. “He did send you home with a sex list! Show me, show me, show me!” 

You look to your bag and before you can even reach for it, Seungkwan is darting past you and retrieving the papers. “Holy shit-” he breathes, scanning the document with eyes full of something like perverted excitement. “A checklist for kinks?”

“Yup.”

“Choking, yes. Spanking, fuck yeah- bondage-” he grins at you, “looks like someone’s a little slut for psych daddy.”

“Oh my god,” you groan, reaching for the papers, but he launches himself off the couch to evade you. “If you’re gonna be like this, I don’t want to show you.”

“Fine, I’ll be nice,” Seungkwan says, but he’s still reading the list, and his voice is lacking any real sincerity. “Okay so most of these are straightforward-”

“You watch way too much porn,” you sigh.

He practically growls at you. “As I was saying- most of these are straightforward, and you’ve filled out the ones I would have expected you to- but some of these are things even I have never heard of- like, what the fuck is…” he carefully sounds out the next word, “Quirofilia?”

“Honestly- the ones I didn’t know about, I just sort of skipped over, hoping maybe you would know- but…” you can’t stop the sly grin that works its way onto your lips, “I guess Cheol did say I could call him if I had any questions…”

“At this point, it’s almost like this list is purposefully vague on some kinks-” Seungkwan sighs, joining you on the couch again. “I bet Psych daddy has been waiting for you to call him for extra clarification.”

“We could google it,” you point out.

“Definitely not,” Seungkwan says quickly. “Call daddy, and put him on speaker.”

“Oh, so he’s just daddy now?” you tease, pulling out your phone. 

“Call him.”

“Hmm… maybe I’ll text,” you decide. “He could be busy.”

“That’s no fun,” Seunkwan whines, pouting out his lower lip.

“Too bad,” you tell him, typing in a quick message. “I said, ‘hey, whenever you have time, I have a few questions about some of the terms on the kink list.’”

“Add a smiley face,” your friend urges, “so he knows it’s like- good questions.”

You add a happy emoji, and hit send. Then you put your phone down, reaching for the papers from Seungkwan. 

“He might not answer anytime soon-” you say- just as your phone buzzes the familiar ringtone that you’ve only given to one person.

Both you and Seungkwan stare at your ringing phone, and then your best friend grins at you. 

“This guy is so whipped for you it’s crazy- are you sure you haven’t sucked his dick?”

“Oh my god stop!” you groan, “and be quiet or I can’t answer-”

“I’ll be quiet,” he insists, pretending to lock his mouth shut and throw away the key.

With one final warning glare, you turn your focus to your phone, answering the call. “Hello?” 

“Hey, gorgeous,” comes Seungcheol’s unmistakable smooth drawl- god, he makes your mouth fucking water- “So you got around to looking at the kink list.”

He’s so god damned confident- and when you look up at Seungkwan, you see he’s just as shook by your new lover as you are.

“Uh, yes,” you clear your throat. “There are just a few terms I’m unfamiliar with, and- I know I could look them up, but you said to call you if I had questions-”

“Of course Angel, I’d love to help talk you through it.”

Your panties are wet.

They’re wet, and your best friend is nearly falling off the couch from how seductive your new sugar daddy is.

“What kinks are you unfamiliar with?” Seungcheol prompts, and you can practically hear him smiling at the way he’s taking your breath away on a freaking phone call- 

“There’s this one,” your eyes scan over the word Quirofilia, and you do your best not to mangle it the way Seungkwan had when you relay it to Cheol.

“Quirofilia,” he repeats, teaching you the proper pronunciation with the calm, pleasant tone you’re starting to fall in love with. “It’s another term for a hand kink.”

Now it’s your turn to echo, and you say “A hand kink,” while blinking at your friend.

“Yes, angel,” Seungcheol chuckles on the other end. “If you check off the box for receiving, you’d indicate that you’d be more than comfortable with me touching you frequently. For lack of a better term, it goes hand in hand with a number of other kinks- spanking and choking for example, or finger sucking.”

“And for giving?” you question, having already checked off a yes for what he’s just described.

“For giving…” he clears his throat, “well, you’d let me pay for you to get manicures- maybe let me choose the colours and styles-” there’s another pause, then “I have to admit, I did notice that you have nice hands the first night we met.”

“Really?” your heart lurches in your chest and Seungkwan grabs a pillow to bite while listening in on a conversation that’s getting sexier and sexier- “What did you like about them?”

“They’re smaller than mine, for one. I’m sure we can both imagine how pretty they’d look wrapped around something… substantially bigger.” 

Your best friend spasms, practically screaming into the pillow, and you can’t help the way your own jaw drops at the statement- 

Are you about to have phone sex with Cheol in front of your best friend?

Do you need to get a room?

“We can discuss it in detail when I see you next,” Seungcheol says, cutting off your horny thoughts. “Are there any other kinks you’ve had trouble with?”

“I mean-” part of you wants to go through the whole list and pretend not to know things just to keep him on the phone- “if we’re going to discuss these all in detail when I see you next- maybe I should just wait till then?”

You can’t believe you’re cock blocking yourself just because Seungkwan is here.

“We can do that,” Seungcheol says smoothly. 

In the background, you hear someone say his name, and you find yourself asking, “did I catch you at a bad time?” suddenly worried you’ve interrupted something important.

“Of course not, angel, I wouldn’t have called you if I couldn’t step away for a few minutes.” There’s a pause then, “I’m at a conference this weekend, flew out this morning.”

“Oh,” your heart deflates a little.

“I was tempted to invite you,” Seungcheol says, calming the uneasiness you’re feeling. “But seeing as you’ve not signed anything, and I already had plans with colleagues, I figured this wouldn’t be the best first trip to take you on.”

This excites you again. “Do you have somewhere specific in mind for a first trip?”

“Somewhere warm,” he answers smoothly, a small chuckle following a moment later. “Anyways, I won’t be that available tomorrow, you caught me at a good moment tonight.”

“Well… will you be back on Monday?” you question.

Another small laugh, then, “Are you that eager to see me, gorgeous?”

“Maybe.” You eye Seungkwan who’s still screaming into the pillow. “But I mean- I remember what you said about needing a sugar baby that fits your schedule, so, I don’t want to pressure you to see me the day you get back from a work conference-”

“That’s very thoughtful of you, angel,” his smooth voice calms your anxieties. “I do have quite a busy week, a few things aren’t pinned down yet, can I let you know when I have more details?”

“Yes, of course-” you bite at your lip. “I should let you get back to your colleagues- thanks for calling me and talking me through uh- Quirofilia.”

You hear him take a deep breath, and then, Seungcheol lets out something like a groan- “I’m tempted to ask what you checked off for it.”

His words go straight to your pussy and after a moment of silence you ask, “Do you want me to tell you?”

“No,” he responds, “It will give me something to think about tonight if you don’t tell me.”

“Okay,” you grin at the way he’s toying with himself- ego fuelled by the idea of him thinking about you- “I’m excited to talk more about this with you when I see you next.”

“Me too, angel.”

“Have a great time at your conference daddy.” 

You slap a hand over your mouth, eyes widening at the way the term of endearment just slipped out of you-

Seungcheol lets out a deep sigh that betrays how much the word has affected him, and he sounds less composed than normal when he says, “Thank you, precious, enjoy your evening.”

You hang up, and as soon as you have, Seungkwan goes ballistic, practically pouncing at you while screaming, “That was too sexy! You guys are too sexy, what the hell!?”

Laughing at his antics is easy- pretending your panties aren’t ruined is another story.

5: Sunday

The ringtone that makes your whole body tingle with anticipation is becoming more and more familiar, and you practically launch yourself across your bed to answer your phone.

“Hi.”

A small chuckle, and a breath, then, “Hey you.”

“How's your conference going?” you ask, having not expected to hear from Cheol today.

“Good. It’s over, we finished the last meet up just before dinner. What are you up to?”

You grin to yourself, playing with the book in your lap. “I’m reading your most recent publication.”

“My most recent publication?” you can hear him smiling now too, and you enjoy the way he teases your choice of phrase. “Since when were you going out and buying my books, darling?”

“Since I saw how many you’ve done- when you showed me your library. I went out this morning and got two.”

“You could have asked, and I would have given you them for free… with a detailed note from the author.” 

“I was eager to begin reading,” you admit. “And you’re so busy- I’m still not sure when I’m seeing you next.”

“That’s actually why I called. I took a look at my schedule, and I’ve got options for you.”

“Ooh! I love options.” 

Another smile you can hear through the phone, and your heart beats a little faster. 

“I can see you alone on Friday, it’s the earliest day I have available- but if you’d like, you can accompany me to a get-together with my work colleagues on Wednesday. I know you haven’t signed any papers and we haven’t discussed anything in detail yet but… I have a good feeling about you, angel, and I’d enjoy having you there.”

“Then of course I’ll go with you to the get-together,” you announce, grinning like a school girl at the inklings of praise he bestows on you.

“That’s wonderful news, gorgeous.” - you love it when he calls you pretty pet names - “I’m sorry that this call can’t be longer- but I’ll see you Wednesday- and I’m sure I’ll find a reason to call you before then.”

“Yes, please.” 

He laughs, and the sound has your core buzzing with interest- how the hell is Seungcheol so sexy without even trying?

“Have a good night, angel, and don’t read too much of my book- they’re all depressing.”

“They’re informative,” you insist. “Have a wonderful night Cheol, and thanks for calling.”

6: Monday

“Hi.” 

You’ve gotta stop answering your phone with a full grin- but every time Seungcheol calls you, you can’t help but get warm and fuzzy all over.

“Hi, angel.” 

And wet. Wet all over. 

Wet where it counts.

“I was just thinking about you,” you confess, toying with the page of his book that you’ve been reading.

“Funny, I was just thinking about you,” he responds, “and I have been, all day. It’s quite distracting actually.”

“Really?” Your heart leaps again.

“I was thinking about getting you something to wear to the party on Wednesday- was going to get Seokmin to drop it off at your place, but then… I realized how much I’d rather see you and give you the dress in person, to see your reaction.”

This man gives you full on heart palpitations- and it takes everything in you to clear your throat and ask, “so does this mean I’ll see you before Wednesday, or?”

“I mean… I don’t want to assume you’re free every night- but if you’re not otherwise busy tomorrow-”

“I always have time for you daddy,” you smile, “and I’ll sign a contract to prove it.”

He lets out a shaky breath, and you love that you’re having an effect on him. “That’s good to hear sweetheart. I’ll move a few things around. How does seven sound?”

“Seven sounds perfect.”

“And it will be a longer stay this time. I know I kept our last interaction at my home brief- but if you bring all the documents I gave you, we can…” he clears his throat, “discuss them in full, tomorrow, if you’d like”

“I’d love that,” you admit.

“Seokmin will be at your place to pick you up at seven then, angel. I can’t wait to see you.”

“I can’t wait either.”

7: Tuesday

Seungcheol is a man who strives for perfection. From his home and work, all the way down to the pretty present he’s gotten for you, the box wrapped in a golden bow-

And when you open your gift to reveal an expensive red fabric just itching to be touched- you think there’s a possibility that you might very much be in love with the psychologist already.

“It’s beautiful-” you breathe, pulling the silky garment from its box to assess the length and style.

“You were wearing red when we first met,” Seungcheol tells you, “I thought to myself that I’d never seen such a gorgeous girl- when I invited you to the gettogether tomorrow, I knew there was only one colour I truly wanted to see you in.”

Your heart is having palpitations, you swear- 

“Do you-” you swallow thickly, looking up at him, “do you want me to try it on for you now?” 

It’s his turn to take a shaky breath, and after a stagnant pause, he shakes his head, “No. I think I’d like to be surprised tomorrow- besides, after we get done looking over the papers and contracts, I feel as if we’d both prefer you to be taking off clothes rather than putting them on.” 

He’s right about that.

You only wish you’d known about his affinity for the color red before you’d chosen a black lingerie set, knowing that tonight would be the night he’d finally strip you bare-

You can’t wait for him to fuck you. You honestly can’t- and all these paper signings- they’re just a formality for you. 

As far as you’re concerned, Cheol is the one- or at least, he could be the one. 

Or maybe he’s just the ‘for now,’ but regardless, for now, you want to be ravenously fucking him-

“My easily distractable darling,” he gently pinches at your chin, pulling you from your dirty thoughts. “Let’s see the papers.”

After putting the dress back in its box, you grab the purse you’d arrived with. It’s large enough to hold the folder with the documents, which you pull out next, setting it down on Seungcheol’s kitchen counter. 

“I see you’ve printed out the other documents I sent you since we last met,” he says, and you can hear the pride in his voice that you’d gone a step above and beyond what he’d asked of you. 

After your last date, wherein you’d gotten the kink list, he’d sent you an email with a link to a contractual pdf. Once you’d gone over the contract in detail on your computer, you’d printed it out, eager to sign your name- but you’d been patient, knowing he’d probably want to witness your signature being jotted down on the dotted line.

“I’m ready to sign them,” you tell him, also pulling a pen out of your purse-

“Eager angel,” he smiles, taking the seat on the barstool next to yours. “Are you sure you don’t want to read it all over one more time?”

“I’m sure,” you tell him, angling your body towards his and fiddling with your pen. 

“Alright,” Seungcheol nods, rolling up the sleeves of his white button-down, his forearms flexing. “How about you let me sign first, then you can do your own signature.”

You hold out your pen, which he accepts, and you watch the way he adjusts his glasses on the bridge of his nose when he looks down at the contract. His eyes scan over the document, and a moment later, the ballpoint pen is gliding languidly across the dotted line, his signature solidified in a binding agreement. 

“There we go,” he says smoothly, holding the pen out for you to take.

Within seconds, two signatures are on the contract, and your heart is racing just a little faster in anticipation of what’s to come next.

“And now to look over your kink list,” Seungcheol breathes, moving the signed papers to the side. 

Your heart lurches when he picks up the sheet you’ve filled in, and you stay silent while his eyes move over each line of information. 

“As much as these all interest me,” he says, “I’m pleased to see you’ve checked off giving and receiving for quirofilia.” His large hand moves to rest on top of your thigh, and he gives you a gentle squeeze, eyes shifting from the paper to your own. “Will you allow me to book a manicure for you tomorrow? In preparation for the get-together?”

“Yes, please,” you rest your hand on top of his own.

“We’ll have to get your nails matching your new dress,” he tells you smoothly, setting the paper down in favour of pushing a strand of hair away from your face, his index finger gently gliding past your cheekbone. “And there will be another present for you tomorrow.”

“Another?” you’re nearly dizzy from how well he treats you-

“Another,” he confirms, taking off his glasses to set down before standing from the bar stool. 

“Are you going to tell me what it is?” you ask, allowing him to prompt you to your own feet, both of his hands gently capturing your own.

Seungcheol gives his head a small shake, a smile on his lips when he responds with a “no.”

Something inside of you deflates slightly at the fact that he’s withholding information from you, and you can’t help the way you pout your lower lip out - just a little - in an effort to perhaps make him change his mind-

“Come on, angel,” Seungcheol laughs, pinching your chin and forcing you to look up at him. His dark chocolate colored eyes are swimming with adoration, and his small half smile is breathtaking- “you can be patient for one more day, can’t you?”

“Depends what for,” you admit, reaching your free hand out to hook your fingers in the front of his belt, pulling yourself closer to the man who’s as solid as any brick wall you’ve ever seen-

“Patience for the next present,” he clarifies, gaze dipping down to your lips as you move even closer to him- “not for anything else.”

“Promise?” you ask, pushing onto your tip toes- mouths even closer-

“Promise,” Seungcheol says, finally closing the distance between you.

His lips are soft- he’s a gentleman, and his hand moves from your chin to be cupping the nape of your neck, the other smoothing down to the small of your back. 

It’s chaste kissing- too chaste for you, and you wrap your arms around the back of his own neck, pressing your chest up against his.

You don’t want any more distance between you, and you especially don’t want to wait any longer for this man to fuck the ever-loving shit out of you.

“Cheol-” you groan, allowing him to tilt your head and slide his tongue along your lower lip.

“Yes, angel?” His voice is so deep and sexy, the vibrations of it going straight through from his chest to your own and then down to your tingling core-

“Daddy, please-” 

“I would ask you to use your words, but now that you’ve filled out your kink list-” he swallows thickly, gently pressing his forehead to yours, “I think I have a pretty good idea of what you’d enjoy.”

In the back of your mind, you remember that you’d said yes to most of the kinks on the list- so you’re not sure how - exactly - he’s going to narrow it down and decide on what to do to you today- but there’s another part of you that trusts him fully.

Tonight is going to be a night to remember, regardless of what kinks he fulfills for you.

“Wait-” your hands move from his strong shoulders to the front of his dress shirt, toying with the buttons there, “I never saw your kink list.”

“Would you like to?”

You nod.

“Another time then,” Seungcheol says smoothly, “tonight, I want to take care of you. How’s that sound?”

“Sounds good,” you admit, tugging on his shirt in an effort to pull him closer.

With a smile, Seungcheol concedes, lips finding yours again. 

Instead of being as chaste as he had at the start, with each brush of your mouths against each other, he’s becoming more bold, gently testing your limits-

Little does he know that when it comes to him, you have no hard limits.

He could talk you into just about anything- but part of you knows he’d never really try to talk you into much, which is one of the reasons why you’re so open for him.

As he kisses you harder, and you tug him even closer, you realize you’re practically trying to climb him- and in one motion, Seungcheol bends down and lifts you into his arms bridal style, being mindful of the black dress still adorning your body.

“I’m going to take you to my bedroom now,” he tells you, and you take the opportunity to begin speckling his neck and underjaw in kisses, your hands tugging and toying with the fabric covering his broad shoulders. 

It’s so easy to become lost in him- his gentle, calming aura truly overtakes you, and now that you’re contractually under his protection - both financially and romantically - nothing else does matter- 

Nothing except him.

You want to make Seungcheol happy- and you note his reactions, note the way he releases a shuddery breath when you find a sensitive spot just under his ear- your tongue dipping out to taste his skin while you press kisses there-

“Okay, angel,” he sighs, “time to set you down.” 

He places you gently onto his bed before straightening to look at you. 

Seungcheol has always been tall and broad- but towering over you at the foot of his bed while you lay there with soaked panties takes him to new heights - literally - and you find yourself practically drooling- sitting up in an effort to get close to him again-

“Nuh uh uh,” he tuts, pressing one knee onto the mattress between your legs. “Lift your arms so I can take this dress off of you, and then lay back down for me, yeah?”

You follow through with his request gladly, allowing him to strip you of your dress before you flatten against his bed again, looking up at him with a lustful wonder that you’ve never truly experienced.

“There’s my pretty girl,” Seungcheol says smoothly, discarding your dress before looking down at you with appreciative eyes- eyes that finally take in some of your best features, gliding across your breasts and the lingerie set you’re wearing- “You dressed up for me,” he notes.

“Of course, daddy,” you sigh, reaching for him when he presses his other knee onto the bed, “wanted to look good for you.”

“You always look good,” he tells you, flattening his form over your own, one hand pressed to the mattress next to your head while the other gently grasps your jaw. “My pretty little angel,” he says, breath fanning across your skin before his lips find your own.

You wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him closer and looking for friction between your thighs-

A moan slips out of you when you feel his cock, pressing against the front of his pants deliciously-

Seungcheol chuckles into your kiss before pulling away from you, his lips moving to your neck- 

“So sensitive, baby,” he says, rutting forward ever so slightly- cock dragging past your panty-clad core and making you groan again. “When was the last time you were properly touched?”

“It’s been a while,” you admit, swallowing thickly and lacing your fingers through Seungcheol’s hair while he kisses down to the swell of your breasts, still captured in your bra. 

“Well, we’re going to change that.”

“We better,” you retort, back already arching off the bed to give him access to the clasp of your bra- which he undoes with deft fingers. “Take it off- please-”

The garment slips off of you easily, and Seungcheol tosses it to join your dress on the floor before his large, warm hand is cupping your breast, lips attaching to one nipple while his fingers toy with the other.

Small gasps of ecstasy escape you, filling the room with your whimpery sounds of need.

Your new lover focuses on your breasts in a way that begins to make you frustrated, your pussy clenching with untouched desire- and the feeling of Seungcheol’s muscled shoulders is almost too much for your hands, which can’t help but explore his body-

“Please-” you moan, shifting your hips up, eager for him to grind down on you again-

The hand on your breast is removed, and it slips between your bodies, two fingers pressing to your pussy through your panties. 

You release a whimper, body shuddering at the small stimulus on your clit-

“Your panties are soaked, angel,” he says, releasing your breast in favor of looking down at you again. “Do you really need me that much?” 

“I do,” you tell him sincerely, once more tugging at the front of his shirt. “I need you so bad-”

Your fingers begin to undo his buttons, but your motions are shaky, especially as he rubs your core harder, teasing you through your panties-

“Please- just take them off,” you groan. “Take it all off-”

Seungcheol grins, “If you insist,” and then he’s pulling away from you, leaving you cold and desperate, your hands trying to follow him-

But then you stop, zoning in on the way his own nimble fingers undo the buttons of his shirt-

And then he’s shrugging the fabric off, revealing a chiseled torso and an abdomen that you could wash clothes on-

“You’re so-” you groan, unable to even believe you’d found a man like this on a sugar dating site.

“I’m so…” he looks at you with a cocked brow, kneeling between your legs, his hands finding your thighs and smoothing down against your skin.

“You’re everything,” you tell him, unable to think through much else.

The complement works, and Seungcheol’s smile widens. “Thank you, angel,” he says. “Daddy’s going to eat you now.”

You’re so overwhelmed- in the best of ways- that you hardly even hear Seungkwan’s voice in the back of your mind screaming ‘hannibal the cannibal, bitch!’ 

Your best friend had been so wrong about Seungcheol- who gets down onto his knees at the foot of the bed, dragging you closer before hooking his fingers in your panties-

You lift your hips, allowing him to tug the fabric from your form, leaving you completely naked-

Seungcheol releases a breath that fans over your pussy, his lips pressing a wet kiss on your inner thigh.

“You’re so perfect,” he says, teeth grazing past your skin before he finally brings his mouth where you need him most.

You can’t help but reach down and tangle your fingers through his hair, determined to keep him between your thighs-

And he doesn’t disappoint, tongue licking you up and down, pressing through your pussy lips and dipping into your core, nose brushing by your clit-

“Cheol-” you whimper, toes curling at the sensation.

You’ve been eaten out before, but you’ve never been as into a man as you are with Seungcheol, and every brush of him against you has you practically whining and tingling with ecstasy.

You’d never thought sex could be this good- and he hasn’t even fucked you yet.

His tongue is nothing compared to what his cock is going to feel like- but his mouth alone is bringing you shockingly close to your high, devastatingly fast. 

Seungcheol releases a groan against your pussy, pulling away just enough to ask “close already, angel?”

“Mmm- yes,” you whimper, tightening your grip in his hair on an effort to bring him back to your pussy.

“You can cum, just- let me know,” he tells you, tongue returning to your aching hole, lapping at you for all you’re worth-

You find your eyes closing, your head resting back against his bed while his ministrations work you closer and closer to the edge-

One of your feet drags along his strong back, your legs threatening to close around his head as your sounds of pleasure begin to tumble out of you uncensored, filling the room-

Seungcheol presses his face against you even harder, lips wrapping around your clit-

“Cheol- I’m gonna-” you whine, breaths becoming irregular as you get closer and closer to cloud nine- “oh my god-” you reach the peak of pleasure, and a gasped “daddy” escapes you as you’re consumed with your orgasm, quivering legs trying to close around Seungcheol-

But two hands land on your inner thighs, forcing you open for the man who eats you through your high like he’s been starved- 

Perhaps you both have.

You haven’t felt something this good in- maybe ever, and all you’re able to do is tug on his hair, moan loudly, and rut your hips against his face while you feel him tingling through every fiber of your being.

Seungcheol works you through your entire orgasm and then some, until your legs feel like jelly from being tensed, and you can hardly breathe correctly. Then, he pulls away from you slowly, pressing kisses along your inner thigh-

You open your eyes to look down at him, and you’re met with a visual that has you getting wet all over again. 

The gorgeous man between your legs, wipes his thumb across his lower lip, collecting what’s there and slipping it into his mouth, releasing a groan that has you practically twitching- 

His pupils are blown with interest, and he’s breathing just as heavily as you are.

He stands up, towering over you once more.

Seungcheol swallows thickly, running a hand through his hair. “I’m guessing from the way you checked off cum play and breeding kink that you’re on some sort of contraceptive?”

You release a small laugh- no man has ever used the word contraceptive in the bedroom with you before. Cheol is so sexy with his fancy words-

“Hey,” he gently taps your inner thigh again, “are you alright?”

“Yes, I-” you take a breath, “sorry, I’m just-” you can’t help but reach for him, making something like grabby hands in the air.

“I’ll give you a second to come down a bit more,” he concedes, returning between your legs, holding himself just over your body while you attempt to latch onto him, ankles crossing behind his back to lock him in- “You really haven’t been properly touched in a while,” he notes, brushing your hair out of your face and behind your ear. 

“No,” you agree, “I haven’t.” 

You cup his face, eager for his lips to be on yours, but he holds just out of your reach, grinning down at you. “Almost ready to answer my question?”

You nod, taking a breath before telling him, “I’m on the pill.”

“Lucky us,” Seungcheol says, bypassing your lips in favour of pressing a kiss to your neck, just above your fluttering pulse point. “How are you feeling?”

“Good,” you admit, letting out a deep sigh- “needy.”

Seungcheol releases a small groan, and he pushes his hips forward, teasing your bare core with the front of his dress pants- “Yeah?” 

“Please-” you tug gently at his hair, “stop teasing me.”

“Just trying to let you take a breath,” he retorts.

“I don’t want to breathe,” you say stubbornly, “I want you.” 

He lets out a chuckle, and you find yourself wanting to prove how much you want him. 

There’s no way in hell that you’ll be able to dominate Seungcheol, he’s as sturdy as a bear laying on top of you, but when you push at his shoulders, he relents, allowing you to roll him onto his back so you’re now the one on top.

He blinks up at you, lips parting-

“Didn’t expect this, did you, daddy?” you ask, placing your palms flat on his chest while adjusting the way you’re seated, capturing his cock between your bodies-

Seungcheol sits up abruptly- and you almost think he’s going to say something, but instead, he presses his lips to yours, capturing the nape of your neck with his hand so you can’t move away. 

His kiss is hungry, tongue gliding past your own and earning a mewl of pleasure- your hips rock slightly, and you’re immediately aggrieved to be reminded that he still has pants on.

“Want you naked,” you tell him between kisses, “want to taste you-”

Now it’s his turn to let out a groan of eager delight, and he lets go of his hold on your neck, pulling away from your lips to look you in the eyes while he grabs a fistful of your hair, tugging ever so slightly to have your head arching back- “You sure about that?”

“God, yes-” you moan, licking your lips-

“Then go ahead, angel,” Seungcheol says, releasing you. “Do whatever your heart desires, and if you get tired, let daddy know so he can take over again.”

You’ve never been wetter in your life. Nor have you ever shimmied down a man’s body and wrestled with his pants so quick, but with Seungcheol, that’s precisely what you do, and within no time at all, you have your mouth wrapped around the head of his cock.

He’s girthy- and you can just imagine how good the stretch of him is going to feel- 

You’re practically drooling on him, bobbing your head up and down while he pushes your hair out of your face, releasing a groan and a “that’s it, angel” that eggs you on even more.

You’re aware that you don’t want to make him cum like this- this is just you returning the favour before riding him- 

God, you want to ride him so bad- like you’ve never wanted to ride any man in your whole entire life.

“Fuck-” 

It’s the first swearword you’ve ever heard come out of Seungcheol’s mouth, and it goes straight to your pussy, which clenches around nothing, your mouth slipping down far enough on his cock that you choke-

“Careful, darling,” the hand in your hair tugs you off his cock, and you take a gasp of air, sneaking a glance up at the man who has you going feral-

“I wanna ride you.”

“Like I said, do whatever your heart desires,” comes his almost casual response-

This man is going to be the death of you.

Death by psychologist cock.

Before you can even think a coherent sentence, you’re straddling Seungcheol’s hips, adjusting his cock to fit snuggly against your core, and sinking down on him, filling yourself inch by delicious inch until you’re sat atop him like a queen on her throne.

His hands find your waist, and you both release sounds of pleasure, your eyes closing to enjoy the feeling of being perfectly full for just a moment before you begin to move-

“Feels good, huh?” he prompts, squeezing your hips gently.

“Feels fucking fantastic,” you tell him- swear words be damned.

Your hands find his strong chest, and you lean over him, connecting your lips while you take a test thrust, bouncing just slightly on his cock-

The feeling is enough to have you both groaning into each other’s mouths, Seungcheol cupping the side of your face while he gently bites at your lower lip-

You’re not used to being on top- and it feels obvious in the shallow way you’re riding him, too distracted in kissing to give either motion your full attention-

But that doesn’t matter, because Seungcheol is rutting up to meet you, matching your slow pace and helping you find a steady rhythm with the hand still on your hip, guiding you as you begin to bounce.

It feels like heaven to be fucking Choi Seungcheol- feels like nothing you could have ever imagined. 

You find yourself getting lost in him, working on autopilot with one destination in mind: orgasmic pleasure, and with each thrust of his hips to meet you, he helps you get closer.

“Fuck, Cheol-” you groan, tearing your lips from his to take a breath, burying your face against his neck while your thighs burn from effort- “Daddy, please- please, fuck me-”

That’s all you need to say to get him to take over, flipping you onto your back so he can regain the top position. He captures your hands, raising them over your head where he can lock your wrists together in his strong grip, then his free digits slip between your bodies, seeking out your clit-

“Oh my god,” you moan, eyes closing as you’re overwhelmed in the sensation of him-

“Close already, sweetheart?” he questions, letting out a smug, sexy, little chuckle. “Feels that good?”

“Yes- feels so good,” you tell him, ready to say anything he wants you to if it means he fucks you harder-

His fingers draw small quick circles on your clit, and your legs twitch where they’re wrapped around his waist.

“I’ve hardly even fucked you- you can hold it a little longer, can’t you darling?” he prompts, nosing at your cheek. “For me?”

“I can-” you groan as he fucks you harder, “I can try- but- my clit-”

“Is this making it difficult for you?” Seungcheol smiles, relenting ever so slightly and then removing his hand all together in favour of wrapping it around your throat. “There, is that better?”

He squeezes your airway, and you’re simply unable to speak, unable to do anything but moan like a whore in heat while he fucks you closer and closer to an orgasm you’re desperately trying to hold off for him-

“You feel-” he lets out a groan, “unbelievable.”

No, he feels unbelievable, and you can’t even touch him with your hands still pinned- 

You think if you could graze your fingers across his strong shoulders you’d cum instantly, so maybe it’s a good thing he has your wrists in his grasp-

“I think I want you to cum now,” he decides, and you’re thankful- only for him to release your throat and rub your clit, which has you whining loudly all over again- “You’ll cum with me, right?”

“God, daddy- yes!” you whimper- the coil in your stomach clenching as tightly as ever-

Then he releases your wrists, anchoring a hand against your abdomen to keep you down while he works you over the edge- and your own fingers immediately seek out the shoulders that have you dizzy with lust, core clamping down on his cock as you’re high hits you full force.

“Cheol-” you whimper, delighted by the way he immediately presses his lips to yours, eagerly eating up your sounds of pleasure and returning them with grunts and groans of his own while fucking you through one of the best orgasms of your entire life.

His tongue dances by yours, teeth teasing past your lip-

Your fingers are in his hair and you can feel him practically everywhere, your entire body alight with wonderful sensations of bliss-

It starts to slow too soon, but every up must have a down, and as his hips lose pace and your sounds lessen, you realize you’re truly, madly, deeply in love with Choi Seungcheol.

And you’ve known him for less than a week.

8: Wednesday

“Are you settling in okay?” Bora’s voice pulls you away from your daydreaming, and you tear your eyes off of Seungcheol to focus on the woman whose house you’ve been enjoying for much of the evening.

She’d been introduced to you as Seungcheol’s colleague’s wife, and you’ve yet to get any one on one with the very pregnant hostess, whose husband, Mingyu, has been circling her like a puppy this entire time. 

“Yes,” you respond, finding your voice, “you have a very easy home to settle into.”

“I appreciate that,” she smiles, taking the free seat on the sofa next to you, one hand settling over her protruding stomach in a maternal way that makes your heart soften. “I’ve been meaning to have a chat with you since you arrived, but both of us seem to have a plus one that’s attached at the hip.”

Now it’s her turn to look over at Seungcheol and Mingyu, who are huddled around another psychologist friend of theirs, Wonwoo, and his wife, their attention fixed on the youngest member of the housewarming party, a six-month-old baby named Yumi.

“I feel as if I’m the plus one,” you say.

“Don’t be modest,” Bora brushes it off with a smile, “Cheol has had his hand on the small of your back for most of the evening. As much as they like to pretend they’re big shot psychologists, we’re the crutches that get them through the evening.”

You take a moment to consider her words. 

This is the first event you’ve gone to with your new beau, and for much of it, you’ve been as intent to stick to Cheol’s side as he has been to yours.

“Trust me,” Bora continues, “give it a few minutes and they’ll migrate over here to be close to us.” She pauses, then, “Mingyu has to get used to being in the living room, a pregnant woman like me needs a good, comfortable seat.”

You both laugh at the way she touches her belly again, pushing it out and relaxing back on the sofa. 

“How far along are you?” you ask. 

Despite already having had dinner and discussion for an hour or two, much of the focus has been on the home and various publications that the four university friends have been working on, with Wonwoo’s wife Minji having arrived with Yumi only a short while ago. 

“Eight months,” Bora sighs, continuing to stroke her baby bump. “I’m just about ready to pop. But enough about me and my belly, you’ve hardly spoken about yourself- and Cheol is always so focused on work, I’ve yet to get many details out of him, other than the fact that you’re worth skipping book club for. Did you two have a hot date last night?”

Your skin heats with embarrassment- “I didn’t know he’d skipped book club for me-”

“It’s a loose arrangement, Tuesdays at seven, I’m only teasing you,” Bora leans over to nudge you with her shoulder, offering you a sweet smile. “How did you two meet?”

The nondisclosure agreement pops into your mind like a red warning sign. 

“Erm…” you swallow, “Cheol hasn’t told you?”

“Like I said, he’s very tight-lipped about it,” Bora explains. “But- I’ve never known Seungcheol to be a fan of changing his schedule- and the pearl necklace you’re wearing- the dress, your lovely nails- they all seem like gifts to me. Am I right?”

Her husband might be a psychologist, but Bora has just as much of a critical eye. She sees right through you.

“Fine, don’t tell me,” Bora waves your silence off, “I know I’m right. I’ll figure you two out.”

“Are you being nosy again, Mrs. Kim?” Vernon, the fourth and quietest man of your new lover’s friend group joins you in the living room, taking a seat on the single chair to your left.

“Always,” Bora responds with a smile. “Wait, Vernon, maybe you know more about this. Y/N is being no fun- Cheol must have told you where and when they met-”

Vernon’s mouth opens in something like recognition-

“Ah ha!” Bora exclaims, leaning closer to you, sandwiching you in while she presses for more information. “So you do know!” 

“I do, but-” Vernon looks at you, then he leans in too, his voice dipping to something near a whisper, “Are we allowed to talk about this?”

“Allowed?” Now Bora is even more hooked on finding the truth than before, and her gaze darts between you and the man on your left, who obviously knows at least a few details about you and Seungcheol’s ‘origin story.’

Due to the NDA, all you can do is sit there like a fish out of water, and you find yourself looking to Seungcheol, hoping he’ll see you in distress and come over to sort things out-

“Let’s just say-” Vernon sighs, giving in to the pregnant woman’s need for information, “Y/N, you seem like a great girl- as kind, calm, collected, and smart as Seungcheol told us you were- but, I am shocked he found you on a dating site.”

“A dating site?” Bora’s eyes have widened, and she shuffles closer to you on the couch, jaw dropped. “Stop- when I told him to try online dating after his last girlfriend I was honestly joking- everyone knows Tinder is hookup central these days.”

Bora is as inquisitive as anyone you’ve ever met, and she checks you and Vernon for your reactions, easily picking up on the shift of energy-

“Wait, not tinder?” She pauses, waiting for an answer. When it becomes obvious neither you nor Vernon are going to elaborate, she sighs and sits back a little. “Now that I think of it, tinder is an app, not a site- the only dating sites I can think of online are-”

It’s like a lightbulb goes off atop her head, and her jaw drops a little more- then she’s inching in close to you again, whispering as Vernon had done earlier, “You know what? Now that we’re discussing it- a sugar daddy site would be perfect for Cheol.”

Vernon groans, throwing his hand over his eyes and leaning forward. It’s clear he’d expected to be able to talk to you in something of vague code without Bora picking up on it- but it seems he’s underestimated the astute woman next to you. 

“You guys are horrible at keeping secrets,” Bora grins, sneaking a glance at Seungcheol, who’s now picked up baby Yumi- “This is so interesting.” 

“The plot thickens,” you offer, unable to say much more than that.

“Oh my god, stop,” Bora says playfully, poking your arm. “Obviously there’s some… agreement that’s been made between you and Cheol, so I’ll try not to prod you for much more information,” she promises, “but I’ll talk to Cheol and the next time we meet, you’ll be able to speak more freely.”

“The next time we meet?” you ask, wondering how the woman can be so sure of herself in every regard.

“We’ll meet again,” she tells you. “Trust me, anyone watching you and Seungcheol- well, anyone who knows him, can tell he really likes you.”

Your heart skips a beat. “You think?” 

Bora smiles at you. “Sweet girl, it’s obvious. Trust me, Seungcheol doesn’t bring around just anyone to parties with us, and like I said, he doesn’t often change his schedule for girls either. I don’t care what site you met on, you have that man whipped.”

“Bora-” the psychologist on your left groans.

“Vernon,” she retorts with the same tone. 

They exchange a glance, a battle for dominance, and Bora wins, Vernon releasing a sigh before leaning back in his chair.

“You know what is surprising?” he asks.

“Tell us,” Bora mirrors him, relaxing back against the couch.

“How good Cheol is being with Yumi tonight.” Vernon is watching his friends and the baby again, and soon all three of you are.

“That’s a good point, Vernon,” Bora grins, nudging you a little with her elbow. “I wonder why that is?”

You think her intuition has finally run dry. She can’t be insinuating that you’re partially the reason behind Seungcheol’s apparent baby fever- 

And if she is, she has another shock coming for her when she finally talks to Cheol and finds out that ‘no babies’ was one of the clauses of your dating agreement.

“I think, Cheol’s the kind of man who likes seeing people happy, and Yumi is very expressive” you offer. “People can like babies without wanting one for themselves.”

Bora lets out a scoff. “Right, Mingyu and I always thought we just ‘liked babies,’ and now look at me. Liking babies is always how it starts, and before you know it, nine months have gone by, you’ve turned into a balloon and are buying a new home big enough to raise a family in.”

You are envious of her position, but at the same time, you’re acutely aware that you and Cheol are extremely new to each other. He’s not the kind of man to be hasty- or at least, you’d thought he wasn’t, but as Bora had mentioned, Seungcheol doesn’t introduce just anyone to his friends. 

You’ll have to talk with him about this and you know it, but until then, it’s enough to just sit between his friends and watch him play with Yumi, who seems to give everyone in the vicinity a serious case of baby fever. 

9: Thursday

“Hold up-” Seungkwan says, interrupting you with a wave of his hands, and they land on your knees, “wait a minute- so he makes you sign an NDA, and then invites you out with his friends, and one of them like- bombards you for an hour about him-”

“It wasn’t an hour-”

“Sure-”

“And she wasn’t bombarding,” you correct.

“Ok, fine, yeah, whatever- but then-” Seungkwan takes a deep breath, “he also has a thing about no babies, and in the first week- straight up rubs a baby in your face for an entire night-”

“Yumi was only there for an hour or so before we left-”

“And then!” your best friend interrupts you again, “on the car ride home, instead of discussing it with him like adults- ya’ll put up the separation between you and his hot as fuck driver, and nearly fucked in the back seat-”

“Oh my god, stop-” you groan, “I told you, it was just kissing-”

“With you straddling the man!” Seunkwan yells back. “And all of this, after he switched his schedule to fuck you on Tuesday night- even though you said it would go slow-”

“Actually, he told me he wouldn’t fuck me till the third date, and if we didn’t meet Tuesday, the night with his friends on Wednesday would have been the third date, so-” 

“I swear to fucking god, I have whiplash,” Seungkwan tells you, looking as serious as ever. “Ya’ll make me sick! Sick I say! What in the ever-loving fanfic is this bullshit-”

“Have you been writing more Hannibal and Will love stories again?”

“Maybe.” 

“Are you going to write a fanfic about Will and Hannibal based on me and Cheol?”

“Maybe…” 

“Seungkwan!” 

“Well don’t tell me juicy stories if you don’t want them getting thrown in a sex fantasy! Ya’ll nearly fucked in the back of a car with a hot chauffeur-” 

“I told you-” you begin to defend yourself again, only to be cut off by your phone buzzing.

Both you and Seungkwan look to your cell, placed a foot or two away on the coffee table.

“Daddy,” you both say in unison, and then you’re lurching for your phone.

“Seungkwan stop!” you screech, grabbing onto his sweater when he latches onto the device first.

“Put him on speaker!” Seungkwan declares, holding your cell just out of your reach while it rings.

“Yeah- I’ll put him on speaker-” you fold easily, “just give me the phone!”

Instead of handing it to you right away, your best friend answers the call and hits speaker, then thrusts it towards your face.

“Hi, daddy!” you blurt out, flustered from the small dust up you’d just had with your friend over the entire situation.

There’s a chuckle on the other end of the line, then “Hi, sweetheart. It sounds like I’ve interrupted something.”

“Just-” you grab the cell back from Seungkwan, “just had trouble finding my phone is all, was worried you’d be sent to voicemail.”

“I’m glad I wasn’t. It’s good to hear your voice.”

Your heart swoons, and Seungkwan grabs a pillow to scream into. “Good to hear yours too.”

“I’m just calling to see if we’re still on for tomorrow.”

“Right, yeah- do you still want to see me? I know you were very specific when we met about meeting up once or twice a week, and I’ve already seen you twice in the past three days-”

“Once or twice a week, plus the occasional group event,” Seungcheol clarifies for you. “I’d really enjoy having you over tomorrow, if you haven’t already made plans. I won’t hold it against you if you have, I can see how there might have been a small miscommunication- especially after my… erratic behavour this week, fitting you in on Tuesday- scheduling will almost always be smoother than it has been these last few days.”

“I’d love to see you tomorrow- I haven’t made any other plans.”

“Good.” You can hear him smiling. “Since it’s a Friday, and I don’t have any specific work engagements on weekends, how do you feel about bringing an overnight bag?”

Seungkwan drops his pillow.

“I would love that, too-” you say.

“Perfect. Should we say pick up at seven?”

“Sounds great.” 

God, he makes everything so easy-

“Can’t wait to see you again, angel. Have a good evening, you deserve it.”

You deserved to get dicked down.

“Have a good night too, Cheol.” 

10: Friday

When you exit your building, you’re shocked to find a different car - and an entirely different driver - waiting to take you to  Seungcheol’s home.

The man himself is standing aside a sleek, black, two-seater sports car, dressed in his usual suit aesthetic that shows off the broadness of his shoulders- 

You go feral nearly immediately, and it takes everything in you to stop from practically drooling as you close the distance between you and the man who pulls you into a hug that takes you off your feet for a greeting.

“Hey there, angel,” his breath tickles your hair and he sets you back down. He takes your hands gently, holding them out to the sides so he can get a good look at your outfit, a red dress you’d chosen, knowing it’s his favourite colour. “You look gorgeous.”

“You’re not so bad yourself,” you grin, playing with his fingers.

One quick motion has him spinning you like a dancer, and you find yourself giggling like a schoolgirl.

“Ready to go?” he asks when you’ve come to a stop in front of him again.

“Uh huh,” you nod, giving your head a little shake to pull yourself from a lust-fueled daze, “sorry, I was just- I wasn’t expecting you to be the one picking me up.”

“I gave Seokmin the night off,” Seungcheol tells you, opening the car’s passenger side door and holding out a hand to help you in. “Hope that’s okay,” he leans down and presses a quick kiss to your cheek before taking your overnight bag and closing you into the vehicle.

He puts your bag in the back trunk, then slips into the driver’s seat.

Seungcheol’s hand finds your thigh, and he squeezes gently, offering you a small smile. “I know we’re planning on having you stay the night, but if you decide you don’t want to sleep over, I can always drive you home later.”

“Cheol,” you rest your hand on top of his, “I think we both know I’m not going to take you up on that offer.”

“Sure, but I figured I’d put it on the table regardless.” 

You smile, leaning in to steal a kiss to his cheek, as he had when he helped you into your seat. “You’re too sweet to me.”

“You deserve it,” he insists, giving your thigh another squeeze before reaching for the ignition. 

The car revs to life. 

It’s hard not to stare at Seungcheol while he drives, and luckily, his hand returns to your thigh, giving you something to focus on. You take to playing with his fingers, marveling at how handsome every inch of him is.

“Vernon called me yesterday,” Seungcheol says, dragging your attention from his hands.

“Oh?”

“He admitted to slipping up and giving Bora ideas.” Seungcheol lets out a small chuckle, “said you looked like a deer in headlights when he arrived to the conversation- she was pressing you for details, huh?”

“Not in a bad way,” you tell him, wanting to defend the woman who you’re already coming to think of as a friend. “She was just- curious.”

“It’s my fault for not being specific with you about the NDA, or with Vernon for that matter- the NDA is primarily for when we go to work events outside of our inner circle, which is why your best friend is mentioned on the form you signed- it seems both Vernon and Mingyu were under the idea that I wanted to be highly secretive about us- but I’ve explained to them the nuances of it all. The next time you see Bora, please, feel free to discuss it with her, or Vernon, or Mingyu, Wonwoo, Minji- as long as you’re not too specific with Yumi, you can consider the baby a confidant as well.”

He’s obviously joking about the baby, but the mention of the child brings those same warm fuzzy conflicted feelings that you’d experienced last night at the get-together. 

There will be a time to talk with Seungcheol about his seemingly dualistic baby fever and baby aversion- but tonight is not the night for it.

You’re thankful he’d even brought up the topic of Bora and the NDA, and already, what little anxiety you’d felt about this whole thing has been substantially dwindled.

“I really liked your friends,” you admit, thinking back to how pleasant the evening had been. Despite Bora’s teasing and prying, she’d been nothing but a courteous host when Seungcheol and Mingyu had predictably rejoined you in the living room.

“They liked you too, angel. I knew they would.” He lets go of your thigh in favor of gently taking your hand. 

You can already feel your panties beginning to get wet- 

No man’s hands have ever had this effect on you before- and maybe it has to do, in part, with the whole ‘quirofilia’ thing-

Or maybe, Cheol is simply a man made by the hands of god himself- after all, how could he be this perfect without something like divine intervention?

Before you know it, you’re at Seungcheol’s house, and he’s pulling into the underground garage, where he parks next to the rolls-royce you’re accustomed to being driven in. 

Ever the gentleman, Seungcheol makes sure to come around and open your door for you, your duffle swung over his arm. He refuses to give it back to you, insisting on carrying it up to his home, where the two of you head to his bedroom instinctually.

He sets the bag down, turning to look at you, opening his mouth to say something-

But your patience has already run thin, and you all but launch yourself at the broad man, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck and pressing your lips to his while his hands find your waist.

He laughs into the kiss, and you think he must not have been expecting you to jump him like this. 

Doesn’t he know the effect he has on you?

“Cheol-” you groan, moving your lips to his neck-

“Eager, angel?” Seungcheol reaches down to cup your bum, prompting you to jump and wrap your legs around his waist. “It was hard being close but not able to properly touch you at the gettogether-” he says, taking a few steps back and collapsing down onto his bed, steadying you on top of him, “Could hardly even get work done today-”

“Was I that distracting for you, daddy?” you coo, teeth teasing past his earlobe.

He releases a groan, hands digging into your hips, forcing you down on his cock, which presses up against his dress pants, caught between your bodies. “Always.” 

“How can I fix it?” you wonder out loud, hands already going for the buttons of his shirt. “I wanna make you feel good.”

“You do, angel,” Seungcheol tells you, “make daddy feel so good.” 

“Wanna make you feel even better-” Then an idea comes to your head, “How about… a massage?” you suggest, thinking back to a paragraph you’d read from his book yesterday. “Aren’t you the one who claims relaxation time, such as stretching, massages, and the like, can be just as beneficial to the mind and body as activity itself?”

“Look at you, quoting my own work at me,” he releases a deep groan. “Are you sure that’s what you want to get up to tonight?”

“Just to start,” you tell him. “We have the whole evening- and tomorrow morning- why not start the night off with something like a massage? And work our way into…” you swivel your hips, “harder things.” 

“I like the sound of that, angel,” he confesses with another sigh of pleasure as you kiss the sweet spot just under his ear. “But you’ve got to let me get up so I can grab massage oil.”

You’d forgotten about that part, and the idea of letting Seungcheol leave you - even for a moment - brings out a bratty side of you that you’ve never truly experienced. 

It takes all your willpower to concede, getting off of the man who sits up and runs a hand through his hair. “You okay?” he questions, seeing the shift in your energy.

“Yeah,” you nod, “just hurry.”

He laughs, reaching out to gently pinch your chin between his thumb and forefinger. The kiss he places on your lips is as chaste as your first had been, and it leaves you tingling with potential, even as he stands and heads to the ensuite bathroom.

In his absence, you begin to take off your clothes, removing everything down to your bra and panties, and then, just for good measure, you settle onto your knees on the foot of his bed, trying to be as patient as possible.

You’re rewarded when Seungcheol appears in the doorway again, having stripped himself of his shirt. There’s a bottle of baby oil trapped between his teeth, and his hands are working on his belt and pants- 

When he sees you sitting on the foot of his bed, like the best girl there ever was, he lets the baby bottle drop from his mouth, catching it easily in one hand- “look at you,” he breathes, scanning your form. 

“Like what you see, daddy?” you tease, skin heating from the attention he gives you.

“Love it,” he tells you. “How good are your reflexes, darling?”

You open your mouth to respond, only to have him toss the bottle of oil at you. 

Unlike him, you don’t catch it gracefully, the bottle almost slipping out of your hands- there’s a small fumble but your digits wrap around it-

Seungcheol laughs at you. “With butter fingers like that- should I be getting us a towel to put down?” 

You hate that it’s a legitimate question.

And you doubly hate that the answer is a resounding yes, which you verbalize to him, annoyed that he’ll be leaving again-

But then you’re graced with a full view of his beautiful back when he turns to head into the bathroom again, and you decide to be a good, patient girl for just a few more moments.

Seungcheol returns, and you bite your tongue while you watch him set the towel down, but as soon as it’s settled, you find yourself saying - in something like a command - “on your stomach first,” you’re quick to adjust to your tone, “I wanna work your back out a little to start.”

“How could I say no to that?” Seungcheol grins, following through and laying flat on the towel.

You nearly drool while watching him adjust his arms, propping his head up with both hands under his chin. His biceps are bulging and your mouth is definitely beginning to water again, prompting you to lick your lips-

“Have you given many massages before?” he asks, as you straddle his hips, continuing to marvel at the shape of his perfect form-

“Erm- define many?” 

He chuckles, and you flip the cap of the baby oil, allowing the liquid to pour into your palm. “I’ll take that as a no.”

“It can’t be that hard,” you tell him, bringing your hands to the muscled back that has you wet like the ocean every time you see it.

“Tell that to my chiropractor,” he says, a joke that makes you both laugh.

You begin to work away at his muscles, both hands smoothing up and down his back, focusing in on the shoulders you love so much-

“Feels good,” Seungcheol groans, releasing a deep sigh of relief that has your ego shooting through the roof. 

“That’s good daddy,” you tell him, leaning over him and applying more of your body weight as pressure for your hands. “You deserve to relax.”

He chuckles slightly, and you realize you’re picking up on some of his diction. Hasn’t he been the one telling you what you deserve thus far? 

All it takes is you being on top and you begin to emulate his mannerisms, the soft dom tendency towards praise. 

You can tell he’s enjoying it, and you are too, your panties getting wetter with every second your hands are on his broad shoulders-

 “Can you flip now?” you prompt, knowing it hasn’t been that long that you’ve been working on his back- but you miss his face, and you’re eager to get your hands on his chest-

With a grunt of affirmation, Seungcheol begins to turn, and you lift yourself off of him enough to allow the movement. Once he’s on his back, you settle down again, capturing his cock between your bodies as it strains against his pants.

“You like this position, huh?” he asks, smiling up at you with an expression that exudes adoration. 

His hands find your thighs, rubbing up and down while you get more oil on your palms. “Not always,” you tell him, beginning to massage his chest, “top can be fun to start, in some cases, but- I really liked being under you the last time we were in your bed.”

“Oh yeah?” 

You avoid his gaze, knowing your skin is heating from what you’d just admitted. “Uh huh.”

“You’re cute,” he breathes, rubbing circles on your thighs, “getting all shy while sitting on top of me like this.”

“I’m trying to focus,” you tell him, trailing your fingers down to his abdomen. 

“You look a little dazed, darling,” he presses, “are you sure you don’t want me to take over?”

“I’ve hardly massaged you yet-” you go to argue, but Seungcheol is already making the move to sit up.

He grabs a fistful of your hair and tilts your head back the way he had last time- his breath is hot against your throat, and he trails his nose up under your jaw, bringing his lips to your ear. “What if I don’t care about the massage anymore?”

“Then-” you swallow thickly, pussy throbbing when his free hand unclasps your bra behind you, “then, okay.”

“Okay?” he chuckles. “My love, I don’t think ‘then, okay’ is a sentence.”

“Fuck me?”

“Not too sure that’s a sentence either, but, your wish is my command.”

It seems like the easiest thing in the world for him to discard your bra and flip you onto your back, lips finding your own, tearing your breath away.

Your legs tighten around his waist, and his oiled chest slides against yours, your newly freed nipples pebbling at the direct contact-

One of his hands, slides between your bodies, skimming over your breast and cupping it, squeezing. You release a moan of pleasure, hips bucking, pushing up towards him-

Your own hands slide over his slippery shoulders, and you mentally kick yourself for having lubed him up- there’s hardly anything to grasp onto, so you latch onto his hair instead, kissing him harder.

He releases your breast, hand slipping down and under the waistband of your panties. When his fingers find your core, they tease past your clit, and you can feel the silkiness of the baby oil on his digits, which glide into your wet hole as easily as ever. 

“Cheol-” you moan desperately, wanting to push your hips up- to get closer, but he holds you down with his large body, lips moving to your neck.

You realize, as his expert fingers crook up and find your gspot, that the last time you’d fucked, he’d never fingered you. You’d gotten to experience his tongue and his cock, but the middle and ring fingers that explore your pussy have something like trained exactitude, hitting the spot that has your toes curling with deadly precision. 

“Oh my god-” you whimper, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck, looking for an anchor while he begins to thrust his digits into you with enough force that your hips begin to rock-

The palm of his hand applies pressure to your clit, rubbing you through the rough manhandling that has you achingly close to an orgasm within no time-

“Gonna cum?” he prompts in your ear, hot breath making your skin tingle.

“Yes, daddy-” it’s the most you can do to hold onto him and clench your eyes shut, an intense feeling of euphoric pressure erupting between your legs-

“That’s it gorgeous, let it all out-” he groans, fingers unrelenting-

You can hear your pussy, squelching sinfully around his fingers- and you can feel wetness gushing between your thighs-

In the back of your mind, you realize you’re squirting, cumming completely undone on his hand, but you’re too lost in the feeling of it to care.

He finger fucks you to the point of overwhelm, until your whines and whimpers are hoarse and tears well in the corners of your shut eyes-

And then he’s pulling his hand out of your panties, and the soaked material is left to cling back to your sopping hole.

Your arms go slack, landing on the bed next to you, and Seungcheol pulls away from your body, making you moan desperately, eyes opening to watch him-

“I’m not going anywhere, angel,” he promises, pushing his own pants down before kicking them to the side, then he goes to tear your panties off, and you see, for the first time, how truly ruined they are. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone squirt this much,” he tells you, discarding the fabric so he can rejoin you on the bed, the both of you fully nude. “Did that feel good?”

“So good-” you whimper, hardly able to form sentences in your delirious, sex induced brain fog-

Seungcheol slots himself between your thighs again, cupping the side of your face, thumb brushing away the tear that’s escaped your eye. “Do you need a moment?”

“No!” you’re quick to protest, locking your legs around his hips. “Fuck me- daddy- please-”

You don’t think any cock has ever entered you as smoothly as his does, aided by the copious amount of wet arousal still dribbling out of your hole.

Seungcheol tucks his face against the crook of your neck, supporting himself above you with two hands buried into the pillow on either side of your head. His lips are feverish against your throat, and the groans he releases as he begins to fuck you make you as horny as ever.

“You feel so fucking good,” he moans, rutting into you with a pace and power that increases with every slap of skin on skin- “so perfect for me-”

“Daddy-” you whine, clawing at his back while he ravages your insides.

“So responsive-” his teeth graze past your neck and you shiver, whole body tingling with delight.

“Harder-” you moan.

“Harder?” he releases something like a laugh, and then you hear him swallow, adjusting his position so he can dig his elbows into the bed, hooking his forearms under your own shoulders, which props you up ever so slightly- enough to change the angle and allow him to follow through with your request.

You release a squeak at the feeling of being completely at his mercy, completely wrapped in Cheol while he’s wrapped in you- the perfect combination really.

The sounds escaping you aren’t something you can hold back, and each rough thrust has his cock hitting a spot deep inside of you, a spot that has you becoming a mewling, moaning, whimpering mess for him.

“Just like that-” you tell him desperately, grabbing at his hair, eager to hold onto something while you get fucked into oblivion-

“You close, gorgeous?” he asks, and all you can do is moan, which makes him chuckle, “yeah you are,” he breathes. “Squeezing daddy so fucking tight- you were made for this, weren’t you, angel?”

“Yes-” 

“Made to be fucked-” he growls, rutting into you even harder-

You’re not sure where sweet, soft dom Seungcheol has gone, but you’re more than happy to be decimated by the man fucking into you like an animal, and his sinful praisings go straight to your pussy, which clenches around him even more.

“That’s it angel, that’s it-” he groans, “just a little more-” one of his hands moves to grab your thigh, hiking it higher on his waist-

He hits a spot that has you seeing stars, and you gasp loudly, crying out-

“Cum for me,” he instructs, and before your mind has even registered his words, your pussy is following through with the command, clamping down onto him while the biggest orgasm of your life slams into you like a freight train. 

Seungcheol lets out delicious sounds of pleasure, gasping against your throat, fucking you through your orgasm while coating your insides with his own release-

You’re completely surrounded by him.

There’s nothing else, only you and Cheol… and perhaps the ruined towel below you, dragging against your back with each rough thrust.

His motions begin to slow, and he comes to a stop, collapsing some of his body weight down against you while you both struggle to catch your breath. 

Neither of you say anything, too lost in the aftershocks of pleasure.

But with Cheol, you don’t need to say anything. You’re completely safe with him, completely content to rest in his arms, knowing there’s not a single place in the world you’d rather be.

11: Saturday

Waking up in Seungcheol’s bed, you immediately stretch in search of him- only to find the bed empty.

Sitting up, and wrapping the quilt around your nude body, you look around, blinking away residual grogginess. 

The man who’d fucked you silly until the late hours of the morning is nowhere to be seen, and you can’t help the way annoyance floods through you. But you remind yourself that Seungcheol likes his schedules, and a quick check of the clock next to the bed shows you that it’s eleven am, so you suppose you can’t be mad at Cheol for not staying with you while you slept half the day away.

Getting out of bed, you’re surprised to find just how sore your body is. 

Your thighs burn- and you suppose a round number five riding session may have not been the best idea last night.

You find the simple black sleeping shirt Seungcheol had given you before deciding to tear it off of you for round six, and you enjoy the way it dwarfs you. 

Sometimes you still can’t believe how big and broad Cheol is- 

Finding your overnight bag, you take out a fresh pair of panties, and decide to head off in search of Seungcheol in the simple shirt and underwear look. It’s doubtful you’ll be wearing it for much longer regardless.

It’s not hard to find your psychologist lover, after all, you simply have to follow the smell of food to the kitchen. 

Your sugar daddy is standing at the stove, one hand holding a spatula while he cooks eggs, the other propping up a book that he’s quietly reading.

He’s so sexy and smart- and sexy… and smart.

You can’t help but tiptoe towards him, latching onto his back and pressing your cheek against the space between his shoulder blades, releasing a groan of pleasure to finally be connected to him again.

“Morning, angel,” Seungcheol greets you, setting his book down before adjusting you, tugging you so you’re in front of him and he can meet your eyes. “Did you sleep well?”

“Better than ever,” you beam at him, leaning up to press a chaste kiss to his lips. “And you?”

“Never better,” he returns your smile, and your heart practically melts. “Hungry?”

“Definitely- are you my master chef today?”

He laughs. “I’m not sure I’m that good, cooking is a hobby I’ve only truly picked up in recent years.”

“Right,” you say, turning in his arms to look down at the pan in front of you. “Very hard ingredient, eggs.”

Seungcheol releases a cross between a chuckle and a sigh behind you, poking at your ribcage. “I can make more than eggs. I just figured, I don’t really know what you like when it comes to food, so I’d make something safe and healthy. Besides, I wasn’t sure when you’d wake up.”

“So this is just for you, is that what you’re saying?” you tease him some more, enjoying the domesticity of this- it’s as if you’ve done this a hundred times before, or at least, you have the peace that comes with familiarity.

“If I had known you were such a brat-” he begins, but you cut him off with a squeal and turn to face him again, insisting “I’m not a brat!”

He simply looks at you with a smile.

“You’re being mean to me,” you pout, cupping the back of his neck and getting closer to him. 

Seungcheol scoffs, shaking his head slightly. He’s quick to change the subject. “Eggs are done, are you going to come sit with me at the table?”

With a sigh, you release the psychologist, allowing him to move the eggs to a plate- and when you turn to head to the table, you see a tray of fresh fruit and other breakfast items.

“There’s orange juice in the fridge, water, or I can make you some coffee,” Seungcheol says, following you to the table where you both take your seats. 

“I’m okay for now,” you tell him, grabbing a particularly tasty-looking piece of fruit to gnaw on. “Thanks, daddy.”

Seungcheol smiles, looking down at the healthy fruit options. “You know,” he says, moving a few pieces of cantaloupe and honeydew to his plate, “I’ve been wondering about you and your daddy kink.”

“Hmm?” 

“Just that- we’ve never discussed it, not explicitly- I guess, being a sugar daddy, the term is in the name, but… you took to it very easily,” he explains.

“Are you suggesting I have inherent daddy issues?”

“Not suggesting, merely… wondering.”

“How about this,” you set your fruit down, “I’ll talk about my daddy issues when you tell me why you think you’d be a bad father.”

Seungcheol looks at you quizzically. 

“I know you say it’s about your work and not having enough time, but- you’re settled in your career and reputation. You have this big house, a chauffeur, a group of smart psychologist friends who are popping out babies right now- and I saw the way you were with baby Yumi. looking at all of that- the only reason I can think of for why you’d be… adverse to babies, is that you have some personal reasons to think you’d be bad at it.” 

The man across from you stays quiet, leaning back in his chair, but a smile works its way across his face. Then, he sighs, “touche.” 

“So I guess neither of us will be talking about our daddy issues at the breakfast table,” you conclude, picking at your fruit again.

“How did I ever find a girl like you on a dating site?” Seungcheol says. “So pretty, and smart-”

“How did I ever find you on a dating site?” you retort, “so sexy, and smart-”

“Maybe finding each other was destiny.”

“Do you believe in that sort of thing?” you ask, cocking your head to the side. “Many men of science that I’ve heard of tend to lean towards atheism.”

“Maybe I used to, but then- let’s just say, I found an angel, and my world’s been flipped upside down ever since.” 

Your heart leaps in your chest, and you avert your gaze, looking down at your fruit. “You’re too sweet to me.”

“As I’ve told you before, angel,” Seungcheol reaches his hand across the table, placing it over your own, “you deserve it.”

☀️ mlist + an. thank you for reading! this fic was never supposed to be this long- i don't know what came over me- it was very self-indulgent :) hope you liked it!

🍭 support me by. sending a tip here or here - or become a patron to access monthly bonus content and extensions for fics like this one :) find the Patreon teaser below! 

🔮 preview. You can’t believe how easy it is for Seungcheol to get you quaking for him- but you suppose, in some sense, you’re always quaking for your sugar daddy, who’d turned the entire trajectory of your life around the moment you’d met.

cw/ tw. oral (f receiving), fingering, unprotected sex, daddy/breeding kink, bickering like an old married couple, praise, semi-bondage, size kink, dirty talk, multiple orgasms, etc...

👹 rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 2.3k I teaser wc. 370

🌙 staring. seungcheol x afab!Reader  

bonus teaser

“Are you checking your book sales again?” you groan, leaning over the back of the sunlounger chair to look over Seungcheol’s shoulders, your hands smoothing down his bare chest-

“No,” your psychologist lover says, closing his laptop and setting it on the side table next to him. 

“Liar,” you grin, moving around the front of his chair so he can see you and the red bikini adorning your body- one of many sets you’ve accumulated over the two and a half years you’ve been dating Seungcheol. 

You have no actual intent of going into the private pool behind you.

Seungcheol’s eyes eat you up, and the smile of appreciation that works its way onto his lips is as bright and full of affection as it’s always been. “Look at you, angel. I’ll never get tired of seeing you in red.”

“Ass kisser,” you tease, watching him stand up from the poolside chair. “I thought we agreed no work on our honeymoon.”

“It’s true that I promised that- but… checking sales on my new book isn’t work, it’s… checking sales on my new book, and besides, you were asleep,” your husband grins, hands finding your waist and tugging you to his chest. “What if you pretend you never saw me on my laptop.”

You roll your eyes. He’s gotten cheekier the longer you’ve been together, and this playful side of your relationship isn’t something you’d trade for the entire world. 

“You always get up to naughty things while I’m sleeping,” you tease, playing the part of an upset wife.

“Come on,” Seungcheol prompts, leaning down to kiss you, “say you love me.”

“I’ll say I love you when you fulfill your other promise.”

“You know, we’re what, three days into this vacation?” Seungcheol pulls you closer. “Who’s to say I haven’t already pumped a baby into you?”

“Me,” you grin, hooking your fingers in his swim trunks. “I don’t feel full at all right now, in any way, shape, or form.”

“Well then, let’s see what I can do about filling you up sufficiently,” he smiles, leaning down to kiss you one last time before throwing you over his shoulder and taking you back into your private vacation villa..

God, you fucking love this man.

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[bodhrancomedy]

8 Games Which Made Me Bawl My Fucking Eyes Out (in the best way)

1. A Story Beside

Holy hell, I think the fact I played this one when I was isolating with COVID and terrified my breathing issues were gonna be permanent probably added to my complete sobbing breakdown at the end of this.

Every single chapter is a beautiful gut punch and the ending sequence where you guide Lyric back through her story? Heartbreaking.

2. I Was a Teenage Exocolonist

This is probably one of my favourite games of all time and certainly one I’ve sunk the most hours into.

The fact that your first run-through is almost guaranteed to be full of failure and missed chances just adds to the pain I felt.

But the bug in the nursery. That’s what got me.

3. What Remains of Edith Finch

I’m not sure there’s anything I can say about this game which hasn’t been said already.

Each new room puts another knife in your heart as you pull apart the seams of the Finch family curse with Edith as the last survivor.

Gregory was the moment I had to take a break to compose myself.

4. Story of Seasons: A Wonderful Life

While I think this remake took some of the teeth out of the original, this farm sim which spans the life of your character is full of heartbreaking moments as you raise your child.

Honestly, being allowed to be queer and nonbinary in this game made me bawl because I remember wishing to both be a boy and love men in the older games.

5. Dragon Quest IV

I could add several of the Dragon Quest games to this list, but after fighting the final boss for nearly two decades, beating this game had me sobbing for hours.

That last scene of Chapter Five had such a tiny little animation of our hero taking off his sword and that send me over the edge.

6. Bramble: The Mountain King

I don't know where to start with this dark folktale of a game. From tragic monsters to absolute gut punches following great unsettling scares, this journey to save your sister as a scared child ripped my heart in two.

The hell Olle goes through for his protective sister is dear to my heart as a nervous little brother myself.

7. Citizen Sleeper

The very concept of this RPG is haunting. A construct on the run from the corporation who took your body is sad enough, but the express love of humanity which runs through this? Beautiful.

I'm not very far through and it's already had me in tears twice.

8. Outer Wilds

I don't think I can say a single thing about this game without completely spoiling it.

Go in blind, but be ready for heavy and sorrowful themes. All I'll say is when you hear the ending theme, have tissues ready.

[vanmarkus]

Re: Buck's loft decor - they kind of established that his designer /artist girlfriend (Ali) designed the place or at least had a heavy hand in picking things out.

Yeah I can give credit for most of the furniture to Ali, but that's about it. But thank you for this ask, because it made me go down the rabbit hole, so here are the details of Buck's loft in regards to what Ali had influence on and everything that changed since.

So this is the scene immediately before she broke up with Buck and just around the time Buck moved in. Seemingly the pictures by the door aren't there yet, nor are the baskets and the pictures on the shelf by his bed (see later pics), it's very much the bare minimum, right? Furniture, kitchen appliances, TV, some rugs and blankets.

The next time we see the loft is in season 3 when Eddie comes to help Buck pull himself together. If you look at the shelf you have some baskets and pictures there that are pretty distinctive and were not there when Ali dropped him off. Obviously people will have stuff on their shelves in their homes, that's not my point here. But look at the basket and the little box beside it... Whatever's inside, it sure as hell looks decorative to me.

Then moving onto the covid era. There are pictures by the door, but also a new dining table. (The one that was presumably picked by Ali was round.) The rug in the kitchen seems new too.

As far as I could tell this is the first time we see this plant, but I admit I might be wrong about that, because we don't exactly see this corner when Ali breaks up with Buck.

Then going forward with the other small stuff from later seasons (before and after Taylor moved in).

Look at the plant and the baskets on the dining table (you can see them on most pics actually). Clearly decorative.

And then there's the fruit bowl. Again, not trying to generalise one bit, but how many cishet guys do you know who live alone and have a fruit bowl? (Same guy "who's idea about healthy food is a side salad" apparently.)

I also honestly doubt that the gloves and the apron are coming from Ali either, but I'm willing to write them up to Maddie or Taylor (except these are colours we see Buck wear regularly when off duty).

This one is just for my amusement, because look at all those spices! (Actually I will point back to this in a minute.)

And finally this picture to talk about the cleanliness.

That is a hell of a light coloured kitchen furniture. Do you know how hard it is to keep something like that clean? (Unfortunately I do, from experience.) Especially when you're a guy who regularly cooks and bakes and not just easy meals, but like very elaborate recipes, admittedly even trying them out 3 times before even serving it to anyone.

But this is my main point: This is not a real flat. This is not a real kitchen. This is a set.

The set designers' job is to create a set that corresponds to the story and the characters interacting in it (while you also have someone on set who pays attention to continuity with objects and stuff, but sometimes you still end up with Starbucks cups on a medieval set, whoops), their job also includes adding tear, wear, dirt and grime accordingly to the usage of certain places and objects.

Of course, it's more than possible that they never really thought about it from this angle, they just wanted the set to look warmer when filming scenes in it and having it clean for continuity purposes.

All that being said, within the show this is Buck's place and someone's home tells you a lot about the person. So, regardless of it being intentional in most cases, this loft and the items in it aren't exactly what you'd normally find in a bachelor's pad. (Nor do I think someone could afford a place like that alone in LA, but that's an entirely different topic.)

[rage-mode-138]

TMA spoilers for episode 123 and beyond. If you haven't listened to the podcast, I recommend it, but this is my own therapeutic rant about how @jonnywaistcoat made me feel.

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So. I have listened to the magnus archives three times at this point, and each time episode 123 gets me really hard. Johnathan Sims, the archivist, falls into a coma of six freaking months. While I did not experience six months, I did experience it for 50 days.

When I woke up, I had no idea what had really happened. I was vague on the entire situation, and I woke up in the middle of Covid with the world in its own tiny freaking apocalypse.

The voice acting John has in this scene is brilliant at expressing the feeling. Everything has continued around you. Things have changed the entire situation, has freaking changed, and you have to play catch up!

I missed Easter of 2020, but I didn't realize I had until 2021 because I got confused about what had happened to it the previous year. I had to be freaking reminded that it happened during my coma. While I was recovering my voice, my ability to move everything the world kept going. And you know what.

"There was just this great... gap of time where I wasn't". Where I wasn't appart of the world and God was that a terrifying thing to come to terms with.

There's this chunk of time before the coma, and after the Coma, that's so fuzzy to me, and being in rehabilitation until 2022 made everything seem like it didn't happen for 2 years. Like I wasn't part of the world. It's still hard to wrap my head around from time to time.

It hurts how vivid my dreams were in the coma. I had full on screaming matches with my mother, my bestfriend (ex girlfriend at the time, currently my girlfriend now) died in the dream, the world was coming to an end and I talked to a sweet little old lady who I am sure as heck was the grim reaper. It lasted from when I fell into the coma to when I got out and ironically my brain though I had spend 6 months in that coma, telling me it was the middle of October when it was only May.

I'm going to touch on that last dream because the conversation with Oliver in episode 121 it's Erie to listen to.

In the dream, I believe I was vaguely aware I was in a hospital asleep. I remember my mother fighting tooth and nail to keep me from being transferred, but when the hospital staff said that no more visitors were allowed, she scolded me. She told me I wasn't allowed to die. And I tried my hardest not to.

I had this older lady with a bob of white curly hair on the top of her head, and black scrubs came into my room. I remember her scrubs having fruits on it. Apples, bananas, and grapes. It was such a weird detail. But I remember because I was staring her down for what felt like days. I was exhausted, I wanted it to stop, but every time I would close my eyes, she would move closer. When I opened them again, she would move and sit back down in the chair by the door, smiling politely at me like she wasn't there to take me when I dropped my gaurd. After days of this routine, her standing up, inching closer to me, and me being reluctant to give up. She laughed at me. It was a small laugh, one of a parent who was aware of how fruitless a fight I was putting up before going to sleep. She said to me, "You really are determined"

Her voice was soft and soothing. Telling me it was alright. That I could trust her. I knew it was a lie, and I shook my head. And said I wasn't ready to go. That I didn't want to leave.

"Why?" That's all she said was why. A single word, but it was a lot to me. Why would I fight so hard. I hated my life, I didn't take care of myself, I had tried to leave the world before. So why, this time, was I so stubbornly holding on.

I was crying, and the tears hurt my eyes in the dream, but I told her I wasn't ready to go. That I wanted to try again and that I could make it different this time. She nodded at me and finally walked over without that ommission aura she carried over the rest of the time. She touched my cheek and told me, "Alright. You have this one shot. If I see you back here again, there won't be a next time." I nodded and she left.

I woke up after she talked to me. After I made my promise, my choice... like Johnathan did. She was my aspect of death, and i have a feeling I will be seeing her the next time I get ready to leave this earth.

Brains are funky squishy meat sacks that don't know reality. And I still struggle from time to time to process if this is reality. I have to check in with my friends and my loved ones if any of this is real.

But yeah. So I know how John felt after his coma. I know that desperate feeling to want to be near the one you love who you have been pushing away. And I know how it feels for people to move my freaking stuff while in my coma

Sleeping people don't need pens.

But I digress. That's it for this post. Maybe I'll post one on the other dreams I had during the coma. I have never really written them down because they are personal and a bit embarrassing if I'm going to be honest.

Thank you, jonnywaistcoat, for writing a damn good show. Thank you, @rqbossman , for producing it. I'm so happy I found this strange podcast by accident. I look forward to seeing what happens in The Magnus Protocol.

[know-the-way]

Like… here’s the thing, I get it. Covid came and fucked everything up - any momentum that any franchise might’ve had got the emergency stop button pushed on it and it sucked for everybody. So maybe hoping for another film or series is asking too much - shooting for the moon, pipe dream, etc. I’m (reluctantly) willing to accept that.

But… ya know… there’s a few things I feel could perhaps be accomplished within the realm of greater possibility. Of which I have created a short list.

*clears throat* *turns on powerpoint*

For your consideration:

1. A Reunion Special - just a chill, cozy little hour or two with the whole gang to reminisce and reflect (and maybe clarify some of the gaps and misunderstandings for Crypt of Tears… please? 😀).

Worst case scenario - it’s the last sentence of the final chapter; a goodbye and good luck.

Best case scenario - reignites interest & maybe entices some funding out of the woodwork (*wink wink, nudge nudge eh?*).

2. Spare Gag Reel? - You’re telling me these idiots spent like 80% of the time cracking up and ruining and takes and you nEVER WANTED TO SHARE WITH THE CLASS?

No, I know there’s weird rules and agreements that have to be made and actors have to individually consent to it being shown (at least in the states, maybe Australia’s different), but like… please tell me someone kept some of it. Please tell me it wasn’t trashed in haste… ‘cause then you will have wasted what could’ve been a giant serotonin boost for so many young, neurodivergent queer women/nb folks, a few lads, and some lovely senior citizens. And just sayin’… I would pay cinema ticket prices to see that.

So. Just food for thought.

3. The Alternate Takes/Deleted Scenes - Those rumors can’t have come from nowhere. Don’t be shy.

The X-Files did it, too. You get caught up in not wanting to jump the shark that you nosedive right under it instead (i.e. that kiss could’ve happened and it would’ve been just fine). So it’s okay, really. No one’s gonna be mad (I think)… we just wanna see it.

I’m even down for stuff that never got filmed, but was in the og script. I will eat every bite of what you put on my plate, I promise.

4. A Combination of All Three - ✌️😚😎

In conclusion - @ Every Cloud/ABC/AcornTV/Whoever Else… please. And thank you.

[sickofthistoxicshit]

Watched the episode, I am so confused.

Probably gonna have to watch it a few more times before I gif it into deep meta posts.

But it was emotional and sweet, and I really loved the Chimney and Hen journey guides.

And I'm pretty sure dream Bobby was more Peter than Bobby, loved it!!

It was clear why Eddie wasn't there and why Bobby was dead in that reality. It was heartbreaking and touching and amusing (angry guy and ghost Bobby),

The end felt a little like "dream a little dream" from spn with the two Evan Buckleys. Hell of a scene, well done Oliver!

I was a little sad and somewhat confused that Buck went to the loft with the stairs, so much for no strenuous activity. (For someone who recovered from surgery in a house with stairs, it's freaking hard.)

At the very least, if not the Diaz household (which was the obvious choice) the Han resistance would have been nice. No stairs, house full of family.

Or the Nash home, Bobby and Athena would have loved to have Buck there for the duration, and no stairs!

I don't know, didn't feel very convincing.

I think I'm happy (is that the word)? That Buck gets his bio parents taking care of him for a while. He wanted that, in his dream world, maybe reality will be kind too for a change.

I love Jennifer's and Oliver's interaction, the affection is so clear.

Eddie and Carla sneaking Christopher to see Buck was such an amazing scene, Eddie’s "I couldn't tell him no." Really got me to tear up. And apparently, Aisha wasn't the only one who teared up. 🥺🥺❤️❤️❤️

Athena's "Wake up!" Was completely reminiscent of TK's mom in LS yelling in his ear (even though there she was completely a dream) to wake up.

Athena is totally Buck's mom. Like May said to Bobby, Athena brought two kids into the marriage, and Bobby brought one. - The best father-daughter scene so far! I loved it!

Eddie will probably get his own mini meta for all that we got to see of him, but the scenes were framed in a hurting spouse waiting for his significant other to wake up, while having to be a functioning adult to their kid.

And Eddie may not have had a full crying scene, but he did cry with Christopher in the room as Christopher talked to Buck.

In 4x14 it was during covid time, Buck couldn't physically be there all the time, I think that what made the difference here.

But I'll be honest, I'm a bit disappointed we didn't get a one on one scene with Eddie talking to Buck.

It felt, like 4x05, that this episode was more Buckley family oriented- the ending, I mean, than Buck returning to his chosen family, who he himself sought out in his coma dream to help him get back.

So it felt nice to see the parents' attempt at redemption, but also a bit forced and a little out of place.

The Buck with the X on the Ley was a foreshadowing for this episode. Dream Bobby tells Buck that he saved him by being Buck.

Being Buck saved Bobby, and it saved Eddie and Christopher. And I am still mad we didn't get to hear those words out of Eddie yet, but for some reason, the writers are holding back on the emotional confessions between those two.

Now Chimney's and Buck’s and for that matter Hen's and Buck’s siblings relationship is all out there to see, hell even Albert's connection to Buck is an obvious annoying (but sweet, I was so happy to see him again!!) little brother role.

Even May, subtly suggesting in this episode, that Buck is sort of a familiar fixture in the Nash household and a sort of brother to her through Bobby's marriage to her mom.

But there is no clear way to describe Buck's and Eddie's relationship because it's not a sibling one. It's way past work partners. Best friends don't act like that (unless they get together eventually), Co-parents? Isn't that a couples thing? It's not platonic, I'll tell you that.

And the fact that we're 6 seasons (5 since Eddie and Christopher joined) in and still have an unclear path written in canon really bugs me sometimes.

But, all and all for a 43-minute episode, it was really good, fun, and tear jerking, I loved all the little markings in the dream, that reminded Buck of core memories (that started with Eddie’s voice, and the tsunami with Christopher. 👀)

I loved this episode and am really waiting for "Recovery".

Oliver said that his caretakers and all the hovering get a bit too much. Now, knowing his parents and Maddie look after him, I can see where this is going to go.

And having already watched the promo, I really hoped Bobby wouldn't get into this much trouble, but sadly, he does, it's very Buck of him, just saying lol like son like father, I guess? 👀❤️

[pirouettefrappelatte]

My experience seeing AOTV:

-It was really interesting to see behind the scenes of 1D’s last performance together

-Simon Cowbell was in the movie 2 times too many for me😑

-I loved hearing about the hiatus from Louis’ perspective and how he worked through everything in his mind to eventually get where he is now

-Definitely cried when he and his family talked about Jay’s passing. The way Louis described his relationship with his mum was just so precious. (The fact that he called her when he lost his virginity😂 I died)

-Louis’ grandparents being the absolute sweetest throughout. (Them showing Louis pictures of his mum when she was younger, ugh🥹)

-Loved hearing about things from Lottie, Daisy & Phoebe’s perspectives as well. It’s always nice to hear lovely things about Louis.

-All the home videos of the siblings as kids?😭

-I never knew how freaking great Oli is until now: “It was better than a one direction gig!” (I laughed at all of your jokes, Oli, even if the rest of the theatre didn’t)

-A little annoyed by the fact that they reused footage from the AFHF doc. Like we’ve already seen this, we know about COVID messing up the tour, can’t we see some new stuff??

-Lilo & Nouis backstage at the festivals so cute *chefs kiss*

-I needed more of Louis doing vocal rehearsals and more behind the scenes of him recording for the album. There was not enough. I just love hearing his voice without any editing and even when it’s not perfect. (That being said, his low voice?? Brooooooo🔥)

-I love you, Helene. Thank you for taking care of my baby.

-The “film strips” when talking about 1D where one would be Louis and then the next one would be Harry👀 (And yes, the Larry hug was cute but I’m not gonna make this about Larry haha)

-My personal opinion is that the scenes with Freddie were obviously contrived. Them going to the beach and Louis talking about him seemed extremely thought out/scripted. And the way Louis talked to the Freddie sounded like how he would talk to just any kid not his son. Also, Freddie at the LA show again was contrived. It was all too “perfect”: him singing along, holding up the sign and Louis yelling up to him, he being backstage when the show ended. Louis kept saying “you made me tear up” and Freddie didn’t seem to care, didn’t look at him when he was talking once. Louis hugged him and had to put Freddie’s hands on his shoulders. It was like the kid didn’t wanna touch him. The “give me a kiss” bits too. It was all too cringe and awkward for me and I’m sorry, but I’m not buying it. I understand that’s the story that Louis wants portrayed to the fans and no one has to agree with me, but that’s just my opinion on it. (Trust me, those were the only two bits of the movie that I didn’t enjoy and didn’t feel like Louis was speaking the truth. Otherwise it was amazing)

-Seeing Louis’ relationship with his band behind the scenes was wonderful. I already knew their dynamic was great but I loved hearing it from the boys’ perspectives.

-All of the fans at the tour shows, the dedication, Louis being nervous and then finally realizing that he deserves it all in the end…I definitely cried😭🥰

-I was saddened by the non-reactions from the rest of the theatre. Hardly anyone laughed at the fun bits, nobody sang along except my friend and myself when clips of Louis singing at concerts would come on, no one “awwwed” at the cute bits, no one clapped at the end, and everyone (save me, my friend and another pair) left before the credits ended. Despite all of that though, I had a wonderful time with my best friend. I’m so glad that I was able to support Louis in that way considering that I can’t go to any of his tour. I love him so much and he deserves all the success in the world❤️

[purpledaisiesthings]

What is that one (or two) episodes that’ll bring you to immediate tears no matter how many times you see it? For me the one I still cannot get through is the one where Nic dies 🥹 like I’ve tried several times but it’s just sobs for me. The episode where the young woman who has Nic’s heart came in was one I thought I would cry at but I was so proud of myself that I didn’t…then Gigi said “hi mommy” when they were listening to her (Nic’s) heart…that scene broke me 😭

The Nic dying episode was pretty emotional for me. I still haven't rewatched it.

That covid episode was defintely a tough one for me. I think that was the season 4 premiere. It was also the Conic wedding episode. We also got a little storyline with Hundley getting Covid. There was so much suspense on who made it and who didn't. Then we find out that Devon's dad passed away. Then the video his dad recorded for him. I was crying like a baby by the end of the episode. There was happiness with the wedding but also sadness with Devon and Hundley.

[oennpellmell]

Stuck in a moment

Have you ever have one of those moment, when you have known a song for years that you found nice in passing, but put no mind into it, until it finds its way back to you years later, and suddenly, you understand it so deeply it moves you to tears? Because you sadly got to experience what it was talking about, and you couldn't appreciate the message until then? And now that you have, you feel so grateful this song exists?

I never though I would ever cry to a U2 song. Not because I don't like that group. I do. I have a couple of albums from them and have been listening to their music since 2001. But their music never stroke my soul, until now because I wasn't yet ready for what they meant musically.

Usually, the music I listen to are music I can put on scenes and stories I made, that can help carry an emotional narrative. U2's songs are already so full and melodically so unique, I found difficult to use them as a story back up. They tell their own story, but they don't tell mine. And maybe that is why I couldn't appreciate them so far, because I was treating it like any other song. I applied them to a story, instead of myself. But finally, it all changed.

Those last days have been rather tough on me. The past years were in general, but the last month was peculiarly rough. However, I feel like sharing some of the relief a couple lyrics gave me today.

My health plummeted at the beginning of this year. Again. But honestly, this time gave me a fright. It started with a little cold. A simple cold and a bit of fever. But due to my second COVID last summer, my health was already fragile and my immune system weakened. So I had not much defense left against this tiny bug which, worsen, and grow like a snowball, spreading to my lungs, leaving me breathless and suffocating for weeks.

I spend a full month battling against that, trying to find a way to breath again. Every whiff of air being harder than the previous one. People don't realize how breathing is important until you struggle to get enough air in your system to function. Fearing sleeping because you do not know if you will wake up again gasping for air, your heart racing. Because your nose is sealed off, so dry, it bleeds, because you clenching your jaw and if you breath from your mouth, you will trigger a wave of coughing that will chock you up. Having to run in another room during the night to not wake up anyone, and being there alone, suffocating, unable to get anything in because your body wants desperately to expulse something that isn't there. Feeling you chest tensed, trying to calm the spasms, that you know will just hurt you more.

In those moments, you are left with no energy, except the one to think. To think of what you have become.

A shell of yourself you have dragged along for the past 4 years. A husk of a person that can't get out of bed, that get tired from simply changing cloth. That loons around, trying to find a reason to be. And wondering were your let yourself go and why you can't find it back. Despite fighting, and searching. And failing, over and over to regain a spark that will put you back on your legs.

Because the idea of standing up is overshadowed by your fear of not knowing how long it will take before you will physically collapse again. Because you realize, that drawing, reading, creating doesn't bring you any joy any more. While your entire life, it was your reason to be. And without that, you can't find enough power to fight against your own broken body.

It was you air. And now, you struggle to even do those things, you could do without thinking. Having to fight and struggle to even take in any tiny amount of it, not because you enjoy it - the feeling of peace is long gone - but because if you give up, you are as good a dead.

To come to the realization that my art was my breath but now I am fighting to get it back, just like I am fighting to get air, is heartbreaking. It is not a pleasant feeling. This suffocating distress of needing something, gathering all your will power to grasp any amount you can to give yourself a brief reprieve, only to realize you didn't get enough and have to fight for more the second it fades away.

So you lie there, taking it all in. That this has been your life for the past years. With your art, your motivation, your joy, your energy, your everything. And that it is simply manifesting in the most physical way possible.

You are stuck in a moment. Stuck in a loop for so long you don't know how to get out of it. Something you don't even wish to your worse enemy. You want to finish you project, the way you want oxygen again. But you can't because your body won't allow you to. Your heart is frozen, your mind shattered, and just like an infection, spreading, growing because it found the perfect weaken ground, it take roots and won't let go.

Then you hear a song, you haven't heard in years. In a movie you watched because you came across it in a moment of dephasing and let yourself be carried by your curiosity. You see an old lion, crippled by grief, unable to leave his house, unable to sing again, because his muse is gone, be sang to one of his songs, by a random stranger. A song about being stuck. And suddenly, the lyrics make sense to you. And make you cry.

Because the lyrics are you. They are your pain, and they are your sorrow, and they allow you you the tears you have been holding back, and the rage you tried to contain, to form and escape.

Oddly this pain, you knew was there and have acknowledged many times before without really looking at it, isn't ugly. Isn't scary. It is there with you, but it is not a monster. It is a proof of your life, of the joy long gone, and the hope that was once there.

It is not to be feared. It is to be hugged and comforted. It is not your enemy, it is your reflection. It need not to be fought, it needs to be looked at. It is the proof you are still there, feeling, and casting it aside, is casting a part of your existence.

When I was a young child, no matter how dark my life had been - and dark it was, way more than now ironically - I never felt it was too much. I refused to lose hope, and carried on, because no matter how painful it was, that pain was my only proof I was alive. Proof I existed. Even if I didn't like it, I preferred it over not being.

I though, as long as I was, I could be more, I could see more, I could learn more, I could create more. It gave me so much strength, so much power. Today, I wonder were this child has gone. Tonight, I want to be this child again.

Recently, I feared that maybe because I had no moment of peace throughout my life, I burned her all up? That this pain was her. All bruised up. Tired and crying. Telling me, I used to be stronger, I use to be smarter and braver. I used to be her. And I felt so much shame from letting her down.

But now I realize, that child had no other choice than being this way. I discarded that pain of not being able to rest, because I was simply surviving. But I never lived. I am master surviving. We all do. But growing up, I came to see that we all suck at living. Society doesn't teach us how. And doesn't allow us to. And it the adult me that needs to make that change. To teach my old self what life is.

Those tears, this rage, this cry, is this realization. The reason why I can't anymore, isn't because I run out, it is because I have to learn to go without the stress of disappearing and be no more. In reality, I don't have to prove my value to society, to any Gods, to my family and all the people that told me I wasn't enough.

I just have to be.

I just have to think: was I drawing because I want approval or because I had joy in it? Was I playing music because I was told it gave me worth or because it carried me? Was I writing because I want to show I was smart or because I want to give hope?

Am I breathing with my whole body because I am fighting off a disease, or simply because that is how naturally it goes?

And long as I am avoiding to answer to those questions, I won't budge from where I am.

There will always better days, they say. It is simply a bad moment that will pass, I heard. But the truth is, there won't be any better place to be if you stay immobile. As frustrating it is to write this. And as hopeless it may seem to be in that hole, the worst limit there can be is the one you put to your mind.

So be your own muse, be your own project, be your own music. Take a good breath... And make a step forward.

No matter where you are heading, even if it is in the dark, or in a scorching fire. It will always be better than standing still, not knowing where you could have reach and what you could have seen. There is no future to walk forward, if you don't move in your present.

As long as you can walk, there always be a ground to explore. And eventually, you will look back and realize, that road was worth taking. It may not make you reach any summit and force you leave behind places you loved and home you missed, but it still leads you somewhere.

I leads you to your life. The one you had, and the one ahead. With every pain and tears, with every laughter and despair. No road is made for you but the one you build, no path is waiting for you but the one you create. And no one can walk it for you.

No shame in standing still, no wrong is saying you are tired. No failing in voicing how hard it is and that you have reached your limit. You are allowed to take a breather, you are allow to say "nope, I am good here." As long as, it makes you happy.

Just make that yours. However, if you feel it is not your place, don't make this misery your home. Don't feel bad because you took the wrong turn. We all stumble. But we don't recover the same. So if you find a hand to help you up, grab it. If you need to crawl, use your nails. If tears comes up, let them run. If you need to step back, turn around. Every distance you can take, claim them as yours.

Every bit, every inch, fight for them, even if it painful. That bleed you losing is proof your heart beats, that scream you push is proof you have a voice, that sadness is proof you feel. Don't dismiss it, even if disturbs other. Allow them to be. Allow them out, allow them existence.

Until the bleed stops, until the scream turns into a humming, until the tears sooth out. Then you won't be crawling, you won't be fighting. You'll just be strolling. Peacefully. Feeling the wind, experiencing the rain, talking with passerby.

Breathing again like you were meant to be.

[heeatts]

I have Also had Fantasies of Sarah and Katelyn(Kate for short) Lothrop Fighting Naked With Each Other a Pair of Twin Sisters that Got Arrested back in 2014 When They Were 19 for Prostitution I Tried Several Times to Actually Reach Out to the Both of Them back in 2019 To See If They Would of Been Open to starring in One of My Girl Fight Vids Renacting a Fight scene like Depicted in My Custom Vids But Neither of Them Replied Back to Me and Sadly Both Passed Away in 2020 I Saw a News Article Where the One Sister Got Killed in a Hit-and-Run back in Feb. of 2020 and Then Saw that the Other Sister Died in Aug. of that Same Year But the Cause of Death Was Not Made Public So I Assumed She Could of Possibly Died of Covid Since It Was @ Its Peak During that Time So in this Fantasy of Mine the story goes Along With What They Both Were Arrested for starts off ---Both are in a Motel Room One Day in the Early Afternoon As Both Were in Extreme Need for Their Next Drug Fix and Both Were Super Desperate for Money Duh Wonder For What? Can Anyone Guess? DRUGS!!!!Both Tried Falsely Accusing the Other of having All these Different Sexually Transmitted Diseases in a Attempt to Gain the Upper hand and Steal Clients from Each Other Coming in/out of the Room Constantly After the Last I Dont Know What Would You Call It? a John? When the One Would be in the Bathroom the Other Would Talk Smack Both Quickly Then Discovered What the Other Was Saying @ First They Did Not Believe It But When the Johns Made Video Recordings of Them Talking Shit About the Other Both Are Now Pissed as Fuck Both Then Bumped Shoulder's Calling the Other "BITCH" in Passing!!!Finally the Last Client left the Room They Now Go Over to the Table by the Entrance Door/Window in the Room Both Aggressively Tear off the Towels that They Wrapped Themselves In Between appointments Both are Now Completely Butt Naked sitting @ a table across from Each Other Glaring @ the Other with Anger these Johns Paid for their Services with Drugs and of Course Cash (these Goods) are laying in the middle of the table Sarah then lays her hand on top of these Goods and Attempts to Take Everything for Herself But Sis. Kate Grabs Her Wrist & Twists It Over & Hisses "Keep Yr Hands off My Shit"!!!Sarah then breaks free of her grab Kate Now Attempts to Take It All Doing the Same Thing Placing Her Hand on Top of these Goods(the Drugs and $Money$) And Then unsuccessfully Tries to snatch everything for Herself But of Course Sarah Stops Her in Her Tracks When She Grabs Her Hand & Twists It Over & then Replies: What in the Fuck Do You Think Your Doing This Shit is Mine Bitch!!!Both Now Stand Up Sarah then Takes Sister Kate to the Ground & Starts to Choke Her Out Her Bare Naked Smooth Ass as She is Bent Over Kate Helplessly Trapped In-Between her Legs 3 Minutes Now Pass Kate Then Presses her cold Soft Foot into Sister Sarah's Belly Sarah then goes flying into a wall behind her Sarah then tries running into the Bathroom to Get Away from Kate Angry As Fuck that Her Own Flesh and Blood her Sister Just Tried unsuccessfully Choking her ass out But Kate now Gets off the floor & Chases after her from behind & then catches up to her in front of the Bathroom kicking her ass with her foot causing her to drop face first to the floor As Sarah rolls over on back to get off the floor Kate is Standing Over Her & Now Bends Down This Time Giving her a Little Taste of Her Own Medicine Sarah is Now Trapped Between Kates Legs this Time until after a few minutes she kicks Kate off causing her to fall backwards onto the floor both now get up onto their knees & then grab each other's blonde hair pulling it out & now rolling all over the floor and then choking the other out cold their pimp then walks in knows what happened because he sees hookers like strippers fight all the time then shrugs his shoulders takes the $$$Money$$$ & Drugs off the Table for Himself & Then says I Guess to Himself Since Both his Girls are Out Cold on the floor "Thanks Ladies for the Great Pay Day and Then Casually Strolls Out --- the end!!!

[silverflqmes]

NOT VERY OFTEN😭 or i’m just in so much shock that im like ARE YOU BEING FR?? ( coming from someone who wasn’t usually the funny or jokey one among friends.. )

YEAH MY GAMING BECAME MORE LIMITED AS I FURTHERED MY HS CAREER😭 i was rlly strict on myself during my final yr cuz i had to repeat it ( had a rlly bad year with covid and all cuz it fucked w my studies</3 ) soo i just limited myself to genshin impact and tekken- since i would play against my dad so i had an opponent LMAO that’s uh weirdly when my interest for ff started to brew bc noctis got added as a dlc for tekken 7 back in 2017 so i was like oooh!! however.. i did not act on said interest🥹 i was like nope!! cannot afford it with how bad i procrastinate.. but fr?? if you go for vet tech i hope it works out!! im going to a uni college, so it’ll be a bit of everything but i want to go into arts and humanities<3 its a three yr cram program but im excited for it!!

i heard that the remakes were pretty different from the og, but im excited to see in what direction it goes in because of that since it’s something the audience already knows and yet there is this suspense because there are bound to be unexpected changes and twists🥸 BUT IM LIVING FOR WHATEVER SEFIKURA STUFF THE DEVELOPERS DECIDED TO FEED THEIR AUDIENCE CUZ ITS JUST INSANE TO ME?? half the time i gotta ask myself if im IMAGINING IT?? the developers are fr SPOILING sefikura enjoyers let them get together and violently make out in the third installment. KIDDING🤠 most definitely kidding.. ( maybe. ) but im really loving cc even if it made me cry last night ( angeal sobs )😭 it’s just like — the ffvii version of revenge of the sith ( for reference this is my fav film of all time ) and im EATING it up🤭 even if it’s gonna tear me tf down at the end.. but it’s great, i just wish more details were added :’) it goes by really fast?? i think it would have been more suspenseful to build up more to lead up to sephiroth’s fall from grace, cuz then the audience gets like EVEN MORE ATTACHED and has even more to lose ahaha.. i’ve seen bits of rebirth and i wanna play so so bad but i gotta hold off on the ps5😔 ec is good but i feel you about the whole stuffing sephiroth lore into a mobile game.. it’s just😭 but yeah i decided to play, it’s grind heavy but i’m trying to get to sephi :’) its just taking some time to level up🙁

oneshots are smtn i do for friends too and just to experiment a little with my writing — or whenever i need a break from fics to just write small stuff and rebuild inspiration :’) headcanons are also fun to do just cuz i get to be unhinged LMAO all types of practices cashes out tho!! but yeah i used to gatekeep too, i was so embarrassed to have ppl read my stuff.. but i kinda just was like fuck it why not🫡 although i took down all my old stuff cuz.. cringe.

dialogue goes hard fr and when a line delivers SO perfectly i just gotta slam my phone or book down, pace about and then return to it.. BAHAHAHA FANTASY BOOKS DO THAT YEAH me personally i do like to be descriptive just cuz i like to set the scene so that my audience is able to see what i see and feel what’s happening outside of the dialogue but it depends what direction i took — if it’s something more imagery focused, dialogue is less emphasized on — if it’s more conversation focused, then dialogue takes the spotlight! i agree with what you mean with the fighting for sure too cuz they definitely need it to communicate since it’s kinda what they were molded into doing ( shinra i will have you by the throat one of these days. ) so i think it’s essential to their relationship LMAO especially for cloud since he has a harder time expressing himself.. sephiroth i mean, has a tough time with feelings too — but he’s a little better at them than cloud is😭 DUDE WHEN TIFA CAUGHT THEM I DEADASS THREW MY PHONE ACROSS THE BED AND SCREAMED INTO MY PILLOW I WAS LIKE NO NO NO😵‍💫 but im glad things at the end despite the conflict was sorted — even if tifa was like yeah uh saw my besti get his back blown out by his enemy, totally normal about this ( she was not ). FF7 RLLY IS A TRAGEDY ISTG I ALWAYS END UP LIKING THE ANGSTIEST SHIT😭 relived you do happy endings tho, it’s healing honestly. reading is about escaping fr so its best to escape to something guaranteed to end well despite hardship!

OOO A DRAGON?? im a monkey BAHAJAHS i think that pairs sillily with gemini, although a lot of my friends think i act like a taurus more😭 which makes sense since im on the cusp ( may 23rd is my birthday and gemini i believe begins the 21st )🐒 honestly never tried the question thing now that i think abt it.. well, somewhat.. usually i like doing au stuff so my questions are more like hahaha what if haikyuu was set in star wars or acotar or genshin — basically something like that and then i do a load of world building😭 which i love<3 but i get that! i mean you’ve been acquainted with them for this long so it eventually comes naturally yeah? BUT YOURE SO RIGHT, i have had moments where i was like SHIT i wish i added this and then i rework things to make my new editions possible LMAO

schedules and writers are like water and oil, kudos to the authors who can actually keep schedules😭 BUT SHIT YEAH I WOULD PASS OUT IF I HAD TO WRITE THAT MUCH IN ONE SITTING granted i have days where i pump out 2-3k words but then i have days where i put one sentence and im like okay thats enough😶 HAKAHWKWJSJ I WAS JUST SHOCKED SINCE WE GOT SO LENGTHY😭😭 but i do have discord!! i’ll dm you my user after i finish LMAOAOAOAOAISSKKS

DUDE I LOVE OLD FILMS SM AND WITH THE TECHNOLOGY THEY HAD ITS JUST SO??? i wish ppl would appreciate it more but i guess newer generations are spoiled now😭 I HEARD SOMETHING LIKE THAT ABOUT SEPH’S HAIR THATS HONESTLY SO INSANE TO ME they fr were like we cannot butcher homeboy he’s gotta eat up the audience, love them for that so much<3 BUT YEAH!! that’s honestly so crazy to think about, every time i look back on my interests and the source it came from or i guess the what initiated it — its just so crazy??? to weirdly think that i would not be doing any of this if it wasnt for my guy best friend — who i had a crush on for the longest time.. and wanted to get into his interests to become closer with him — which resulted in me discovering fanfic on my own, writing it and getting the courage to share my writing with others, as well as making cool friends😭 BAKAHSWKSJ YEAH I AM🫣 THATS SO CRAZY TO THINK ABOUT THOUGH??? no wonder you write so wonderfully, you really really honed your craft<33 AKAKAKS THAT SOUNDS FUN THO🥹 my old best friend at the time when i began writing would co-write with me and we would also draw scenes too- back then it was when we played wizard101 together, minecraft and sims — and just spawned all these handwritten and drawn stories😵‍💫😵‍💫 it was so much fun, i kept all of them<3 GEEZ DELETED??? that sounds like wattpad now, they rlly just kinda fucked up the whole site.. that’s why i keep nsfw content here :’) HELP THE LEMON AND LIME ERA AJAJAJSHS that is such a throwback oml, now its gone to smut and most recently- spice among book lovers😭😭

zakkura was doomed a bit yeah</3 im not sure how things turned out in rebirth since i hear he’s in it?? but im rooting for him and aerith more😭 they are just so cute in cc together🙁 BAKQSH yeah sefikura.. its a tough call🥹 but they both need each other — like one cannot be without the other no matter how many times cloud tries to reject him.. DUDE I LOVE OLD SCHOOL BL THO<3 maybe thats why i was so drawn to your fics cuz honestly i dont read ship stuff anymore since im a little more self indulgent ahahaha.. but sefikura snatched me up in such a stunning move🧎‍♀️

LMAOO YEAH HE IS he’s such a sweetheart<3 i love him being the mediator and comedic relief, the much needed extrovert among two emotionally constipated introverts BAHAHAHA but yeah.. i figured things might be a little rocky between cloud and seph after the ending of SI but zack will help, i believe in him!!! ESPECIALLY WITH THAT EXCERPT ABAHAHSSHKW i bet cloud would let sephiroth sit on his lap to prove a point tbh ( it probably fails and leads him to getting teased instead AHAHAHAHA )

HELP IM JUST NATURALLY NAIVE😭😭 might also be the cloud kinnie in me cuz i continuously stumbled into those thinking patterns of like okay theres a happy ending BUT IS SOMETHING GONNA HAPPEN TO SEPHIROTH BECAUSE THE POSSIBILITY OF DEATH KEEPS GETTING MENTIONED AND IDK WHAT TO THINK.. so you successfully got me to follow the cloud train of thoughts🤣 but yeah writing is about playing your audience a bit, even i do that especially with my constant need of leaving cliffhangers ahahahhaha… its rlly important to get them in touch with their emotions cuz it draws them in more — which is what happened to me ehe.. BRO YEAH IAYSKSJSKSKS in ID the whole time im like oh gosh what is he planning all we know is cloud’s pov so it leaves me wanting to know what sephiroth is gonna do yk?? so once again — you succeeded on that BAHAHAHAHA speaking of its almost 1am I HAVE GOT TO READ CH 15🫡 ao3 was down today and i almost combusted im so glad it repaired itself cuz i was like NO WAY NOT WHEN I WAITED ALL WEEK FOR THIS MOMENT😭 kinda worked out tho cuz i finished my motivation later yayayay~

aaaa i hope it’s gotten better, it’s tough to deal with that — i used to have really bad anxiety a couple years back due to school :’) but i’ve somewhat gotten better, my only issue is stress.. im glad sefikura has helped you though!! AND THAT LIFE GETS KINDER TO YOU BC YOU DESERVE IT FOR BEING SO SWEET🙁❤️

OMW TO THE REUNION AFTER I HYPE UP MY BESTI REAL QUICK🕺 EEEEEK SO EXCITED TO READ<33

hi hi not necessarily an ask but i wanted to tell you that your works are so good??? like i’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that your stories are not the canon plot of ff7 AND YET IT FEELS SO REALISTIC BECAUSE YOU PORTRAY THE CHARACTERS SO WELL??? i fr almost gaslighted myself for a second there BAHAHAHA ahem, anyway, really love your style of writing, it’s so refreshing to me<3 literally got me giddy and looking forward to fic updates for the first time in awhile?? i’ve been in a reading slump for a good minute and your sefikura fics dragged me out in the most emotional yet spicy way possible IDK HOW YOU DO IT WITH THE WAY TAG TEAMING SMUT AND ANGST SO LANGUIDLY, LITERALLY GOT ME UGLY CRYING ONE MINUTE AND THEN SCREAMING THE NEXT

the power you hold oml but anyway — all in all it’s immaculate, eating it up fr🧎‍♀️ can’t wait to read more!!

and ummmm.. my bad for the word vomit i fr had to simp on main and show my appreciation🫡 have a good rest of your day / night!!<33

Wow, thank you so much! 😱 It’s not everyday I get praised like that, and I’m so honored you like my work that much! 🥰 I love to write, and I have original work on the backburner indefinitely because sefikura has stolen my soul for all eternity, haha. And I know exactly what you mean, I was so disappointed that fics I liked a lot only updated once a year or were left unfinished and I just...got so fed up with it that I decided I’d rather just spend my time writing my own than keep trying to read them. That’s why I’ll never leave a story unfinished(though sequels may take a while to appear). My comments section on AO3 is open to both users and guests, so you are always free to scream about it there or here, I don’t mind in the slightest! It makes me excited to post when you’re excited for the update, too! 

Out of curiosity, which story got you hooked on my work? 👀 In Death is my current fic that has 5 chapters left, and I’ll post one every single Friday until it’s complete, with chapter 15 coming out in just a couple days~! Ahh, the reunion is almost at hand! I also made a special image for the final chapter, and I can’t wait to share it. :) Thank you for leaving me such a lovely comment, I’m truly honored to receive it! 💖💖

[pastelracha]

SKZ reacting to you squirting

☾ Title : skz reacting to you squirting 

☾ Pairing: all members (expect i.n) x fem!reader

☾ Genre: +18, smut, established relationship.

☾ Prompt: request : Hi! Can u make like an skz reaction to u like Squ*rting 👀…….. I mean u don’t have to do it if it’s too extreme 😅

☾ A/N:  here is another request sorry for the wait but I'm moving and had covid so yeah ! I couldn’t write for Jeongin I'm sorry if it bother you but I can’t do smut for i.n but I can’t do it .. don’t forget to give me your feed back guys xox

☾ Word Count: 0.6K

masterlist | ask or request

BANG CHAN 

It would be such an ego boost for Chan, let’s be real his dominant side would really be hyping himself up, making his gf squirting just with his finger and mouth. Wetting his sheet and forearm, a huge smirk sitting on his face looking at your directly in the eyes. 

He would want it to happen every time you guys have sex, cause it would be such a turn on for him to know he can make you come this hard. 

“Well damn baby girl’’ he chuckled. 

LEE MINHO 

Minho would look at his forearm, with big eyes and then to you, somehow feeling a little shy to your body reaction to his stimulation. Pink creeping on his cheeks but also he would want it to happen once again. Your trembling body and hard breaths, you were looking like a chiffon doll underneath him, your body fighting the over stimulation. 

He would be so turned on, about the fact he knows your body so well. “Fuck baby do it again’’ he would say in awe. 

SEO CHANGBIN 

Changbin felt like he was about to come right away when he felt your juice coming hard his way, his eyes becoming even darker than before. You squirting unlocked another level of Changbin lust, your moans clouding his mind, he couldn’t focus on anything else, expect your body and sounds. Tears rolling on your face, he never find your prettier than right now a mess on his bed, his boxer and abs covered in your cum. Also a big ego boost for him. “ wow’’ was his only reaction. 

HWANG HYUNJIN 

Hyunjin would totally take a mental picture of you, crying of over stimulation, your hand covering your mouth and his cock still trapped inside your cunt, his finger stuck to your clit and his eyes on your face. 

His first reaction, he totally want to paint this scene, he would chuckled to himself. Feeling proud to his thrust game, and how easy is it to him to make you such a mess for him. “ you made a mess doll’’ 

HAN JISUNG

Cocky Jisung entered the chat, his lower lip stuck between his teeth. You been teasing him all day long until he couldn’t take it anymore, he throw you on the bed fingering you and teasing your bundle of nerves with his mouth. The vibration of his sounds hitting your clit, making your move and whimpering his name. But his hand holding you in place you juice covering his chin, lips and arm. A smiling Jisung   “You been teasing me all day baby take what I give you’’ 

LEE FELIX 

Remember that Felix smirk, that how he would look at you after you came. But he also continued to stimulated you wishing for more, you crying, trying to escape his fingers. Let’s be real lix would look like a fallen angel with your come running on his chin and licking it. Making you taste yourself off his fingers. “That’s how good you are to me angel’’ 

He could slap your cunt once or twice making your crying harder. 

KIM SEUNGMIN

I feel like Seungmin wouldn’t really understand at first, like the hell ? Did I do that ? 

He would look at you for any kind of answer but seeing the mess you were he was only asking himself if he hurt you or what ? Seeing you crying his name, asking him to do it again cause over stimulation with him seems so good to you, he would like his ego touch the sky, and find you so hot in that moment. “Again huh ?’’ 

[dragonageconfessions]

CONFESSION:

I've played all 3 games multiple times since COVID started getting prepped for 4. Setting up my worlds getting invested in each set up. So one thing I'm doing is trying to leave a different person in the fade each playthrough. (Cheated a little left Stroud the first 2 games cause i couldn't bare to leave Hawke) But for my final two i forced myself to leave Alistair with the Wardens so I had to make the choice. Left a Male/Mage Hawke (romanced Fenris, all his family is dead) and honestly I burst into tears 3 times. When I had to choose him, when Varric came running up asking for him. And again during the scene where Varric is writing letters to their friends and Hawkes LI. The grief was real. I love Alistair just as much, and actually probably more. Hes my most romanced LI through all playthroughs through all games. But leaving him behind didn't quite hit the same way. Noone other than Varric really mentions it even happened. My Inquisitior chewed out the wardens and that made me tear up a little but, Lelianna, Morrigan, hell even Cullen, all knew Alistair from the 5th Blight, none of them even acknowledge his sacrifice. And this was a playthrough with a dead Warden. I just wished there was a scene like with Varric getting angry with the Inquistor with Lelianna. Or Morrigan even mentioning him. I feel a little betrayed by Bioware. Give Alistair some love, the man deserved to be mourned by his friends.

[beyondtheborderridiculous]

Mankai Stage Act 2 Spring 2022

ACT 2 FINALLY CAME TO MANKAI STAGE!!!

I watched the last available showing on dmm, which was a little more than a week ago, so I'm a bit disappointed that I can't write a more fresh review, but I was busy and now I have the time and energy to write down my thoughts for what I watched.

I have many thoughts and feelings, but the overall feeling I had was just... Tears. I cried so much during this show, lololol. Everyone's acting is so good! You could tell that the actors were really invested in their characters.

I will be honest though, it didn't really feel like a Mankai Stage, stage play. I think it's because I'm so used to with what they were like before, that with the many changes, it felt like I was watching a different production company. Like, the stage for one, is MUCH bigger. I kind of miss that little homely feel that Mankai Stage had previously, but it does give you a sense of, 'wow, Mankai Company grew a lot. No wonder they're able to afford looking for a 6th troupe member.'

And the format changes. Usually, there's two plays per show, but this time there's only one. Which is understandable, since the main stories in Act 2 are so much longer than those in Act 1. If I were to describe this show, then before intermission was centered on Masumi, and after intermission was centered on Chikage.

Speaking of Masumi, another thing that made it feel like a different company was that there were a lot of new actors. Masumi, being one of them. Now, the new actor for Masumi is great. He's a great actor, good singer, etc. But he plays Masumi in a different way than Hikaru did. And that's not his fault, it's just a different Masumi than I'm used to. So I think it'll just take time for me to get used to him. Same goes for Yuzo.

Despite all these changes, Spring 2022 was great. Chikage's actor is awesome! He was really able to capture Chikage's switch, from being the polite, perfect troupe member one moment, to being one second away from committing a crime to the next.

There were so many Gekka scenes. I cry every time. Hisoka, you made me cry every time. And August is there! You can't see his face, but he's there!

Tsuzuru's zombie number was great. Absolutely no lyrics, just him groaning. Yes.

I'm still bitter that there was no Tasuku, lololol.

Also, Mankai Stage is determined to go the same absolutely no-woman-on-stage-route that the game does, since there was no actor for Masumi's grandma. Like. Masumi's dad's secretary had an actor (with a really deep voice), but no grandma, lololol. The actors talk to the audience, just like they do when they talk to the director.

Ok, speaking of director, Chikage does kidnap the audience!!! They blacked out the whole venue, so you see absolutely nothing, and all you hear is Chikage's voice, just as if you were wearing a blindfold. And then suddenly you're in a dimly lit room.

But you know the scene were Izumi bugs Chikage to recite the lines with her? I think they manipulated that scene pretty well using their staging and Sakuya, lol.

One thing I am kind of disappointed about, was there was no family scene with them calling Chikage grandpa (or at least, I didn't catch it), but what I DO APPRECIATE, is that they copied the sleepover scene EXACTLY the same as the CG!!!!! Citron and Itaru cuddled up against Chikage, and Tsuzuru sleeping in that wtf awkward angle, lololol. That scene was just extremely cute.

Oz was done really well. To be honest, it was probably only possible because of the new stage that they got. They played around a lot with their space.

And the actors, once again, were able to greet the audience during the finale! I guess Covid restrictions are lifting in Japan at this time.

Spring 2022 was a lot of fun!!! I can't wait to buy the DVD to watch it again, and the backstage! If any of you watched it, I'd love to hear your thoughts on it!

[archived-kin]

you go to a devildom zoo and a penguin attempts to seduce you (the brothers are not happy)

note from kin: this was meant to be out way sooner but covid-19 and a whole lot of catch-up coursework said no to that idea >:(

anyway formatting on mobile is actual ass so let me know if this ends up unreadable!

enjoy, darlings!

fandom: obey me!

character(s): gn!reader, lucifer, mammon, leviathan, satan, asmodeus, beelzebub, belphegor, diavolo (mentioned briefly)

pairing(s): demon brothers/reader, penguin/reader (one-sided), a bat also very briefly tries to seduce you

warning(s): reader really loves deadly creatures which i know isn't really a warning but just as a heads up for those who can't relate i guess??? also this is ended up WAY longer than i intended lmao

genre: fluff (but also crack)

oh the pure joy you felt when you found out that there are zoos in the devildom

zoos full of sphinxes, chimeras, hydras, krakens, manticores, basilisks and griffins, but zoos nonetheless

in fact, you’d argue that the fact that the zoos here are full of potentially lethal legendary beasts is even COOLER

so, naturally, you begged lucifer to let you go to one

his response?

“absolutely not, you could be killed.”

well now that’s just unfair

there are so many things down here in the devildom that could kill you! the heat, the food, the dragons just wandering around in the skies, your fellow students at rad, belphie, not sleeping enough, the stupidly narrow staircases, lucifer himself! in fact, you’d argue that lucifer has already come close to killing you more times than any of those creatures at the zoo

unfortunately that was entirely was the wrong thing to say because now lucifer’s gone all broody on you

you just KNOW he’s gonna spend all of next week either drowning himself in work or sulking in the music room if you don’t cheer him up quickly

so you guess it’s time to pull out the puppy eyes and hope that they work

spoiler alert: they do. you also end up being stuck in lucifer’s arms for about five hours afterwards as he cuddles out all of his negative thoughts, but that’s not a bad thing, so you’re not complaining

the next day, however, you are BACK on your bullshit

and you are back with a vengeance!

you are getting a trip to that zoo whether lucifer likes it or not and you will not rest until you succeed

your first idea is to go to diavolo for help because.... he’s diavolo and lucifer would listen to that demon before anyone, including himself

unfortunately that doesn’t work because diavolo is out on a business trip to the human world with barbatos

(which means your butler buddy, who could probably have helped you make your case, is also out of the picture)

you suppose that you could try getting simeon in on the scheme but you’re pretty sure he’d end up making it worse with his insatiable penchant for teasing lucifer

your final solution?

cry

and it worked a treat too!

lucifer is just a sucker for his human and he doesn’t like seeing them sad okay :((

he finally agrees to let you go to the big zoo just north of RAD since it’s directly under diavolo’s jurisdiction, but he also makes you promise that you’ll take at least one brother with you

(he’s hoping you’ll choose him)

but then you uno reverse card him!

jokes on you, lucifer, your human wants a family day out!!

lucifer would be lying if his heart didn’t swell slightly when you proclaimed you wanted all the brothers to come with you so that you could all spend the day together having fun

although you may have just made a mistake because now lucifer is going to do everything in his power to make sure the day goes perfectly, and if that means smiting the rude demon in line in front of you, then what about it?

(luckily you stop him from the killing someone before you’re even inside, but it was a close call)

the moment the eight of you step into the zoo satan whisks you off to look at the devildom equivalent of big cats

which means the sphinxes and manticores first, then the giant fire-breathing tigers

he’s planning to have a nice heart-to-heart conversation with you while the two of you stroll along the exhibit, but then you both get distracted by how cool the animals are

so the two of you just end up dragging each other back and forth to look at one creature after another

not the romantic scene satan initially had in mind, but he’d be lying if he said this wasn’t also absolutely perfect

holding your hand while you talk enthusiastically about how majestically that manticore leapt thirty feet into the air with your entire face lighting up like the most beautiful lantern in the world? stunning. outstanding. he wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.

meanwhile, back at the entrance, levi is sulking, mammon is fuming, beel is already stuffing himself with overpriced food stall delicacies, belphie has crawled under a bench to nap while he waits for you to come back, asmo is taking pictures with the extra long-legged flamingo billboard, and lucifer is so preoccupied with trying to figure out just how the hell the walking system here works that he hasn’t even noticed that you and satan have just disappeared into the void

in the end the remaining brothers split off into pairs, all agreeing that whoever is the first to find you and satan will get to have some one-on-one time with you next

and, drumroll please, that lucky pair turns out to be... beel and belphie!

(really they have an unfair advantage though since beel can smell out anyone he knows from a mile away)

meanwhile satan has just spent just about all of the grimm he brought with him on a hideously overpriced plush version of the manticore you were so fascinated with

but the smile on your face when he gives it to you?? the LIGHT that exudes from you when you declare that the plush’s name is now greenie because it has green eyes just like his?? worth it. absolutely worth it.

but uh oh, the moment is soon to be gone, because guess who’s here?

beel and belphie can’t let satan have all your attention! beel is a little more forgiving, but belphie is going to make sure he’s the first to get a kiss today, anti-lucifer club alliance be damned!

he’s not going to admit that of course. instead, he’s going to very subtly hip-bump satan out of the way so that he can hold your hand instead (beel can have the other hand, but if he tries to pull you away, he’s getting what-for.)

normally satan would be pretty miffed by this, but hey, he’s in a good mood right now and he doesn’t want to spoil the day by getting pissy, so he lets the twins get away with it. younger sibling privilege, am I right?

belphie wants to take you to his particular favourite exhibit here, the giant carnivorous cattle with horns the size of chair legs

beel, on the other hand, suggests that maybe you don’t want to see a gargantuan mammal tear apart a giant piece of meat that may or may not have been sourced from a human graveyard (the giant carnivorous cattle are picky, okay? at least they’re not murdering people for the meat)

you, however, are absolutely fearless

besides, what harm can a giant carnivorous cattle with horns the side of chair legs do to you when it’s being kept behind six inches of hellfire trench, with three of the devildom’s most powerful demons close by to swoop in to your rescue?

beel begrudgingly agrees to go see the giant carnivorous cattle, but makes you promise to stay slightly behind him so that he can jump to defend you should they get out of hand

your big strong demon standing in front of you, protecting you as you get to look at a super cool and also deadly creature? you are absolutely on board with this.

(satan is slightly concerned by your willingness to go near creatures that could tear you to pieces in a second, but if he gets to see you smile like that again then... well, what can he say, he’s a simp)

so off you go!

the giant carnivorous cattle are AWESOME. you get to watch a trio of them eat what appears to be an entire car in, like, two seconds, tops, and they don’t even look bothered by the metal disappearing down their massive gullets.

(you ask belphie in an undertone why the cattle are eating cars if they’re carnivorous. his response is that even giant carnivorous cattle need their minerals, so the zookeepers feed them a bunch of the metal stuff you get in human scrapyards.)

(sounds like an RSPCA violation to you...)

you’re practically tumbling over the fence as you lean forward to get a proper look at them and their adorable tiny wings, so belphie ends up having to pull you back

just as he does it, however, he has a very bright idea

so instead of gently tugging you back as he’d originally planned, he practically yanks you into him, conveniently slipping your hand out of beel’s in the process

listen, it’s not that belphie resents letting beel hold hands with you at the same time as him. a demon’s just gotta get his hugs sometimes, alright?

of course you’re a little miffed about being so violently yoinked, so you’re about to turn around and give belphie a piece of your mind, but then he pulls you close to him and nuzzles his nose into your hair

how are you supposed to scold him for that???

he seems so content and he’s even doing that adorable little purring thing demons do when they’re happy that he never does in public

you can’t just pull out of his arms! it’s probably illegal!!!!!

belphie gets a pass for being cute this time. only this time. no more.

(as an aside, this sort of thing happens at least once a day because belphie’s a whiny little baby who can’t go twelve hours without your love)

anyway now beel looks a little downtrodden which you are not having

your solution? wait until belphie lets go of you on his own and then you can give beel a hug of his own.

unfortunately belphie doesn’t seem interested in separating from you

luckily you don’t end up having to deal with that, because then satan steps in

partially because he feels bad for beel and also partially because okay that’s enough touching now, know your boundaries

which means it’s BEEL’S TURN TO SHINE

does this demon want you to die? because that is what’s going to happen if he keeps being so friggin sweet

first of all he buys you a bunch of treats from the nearby food stalls with his own money and offers every single one to you

is he on drugs? is that what’s happening here? what happened to the avatar of gluttony who ate first and asked questions later???

of course you aren’t going to be so cruel as to take every single one of the treats he’s offering when you can physically hear his stomach rumble as he holds them out to you

instead, you take a handful or so and tell him to eat the rest himself because he deserves it

beel almost tears up he’s so happy he loves you so much in that moment

some may say he’s being dramatic but beel says that every moment with you is a treasure and he has every right to be emotional

belphie is a teensy bit pissed that satan simp-policed him when he’s just as whipped but it’s beel so... he’ll stay down

satan, meanwhile, starts snapping pictures of you at every opportunity, most of them candids, to save to the album he has dedicated especially to you, and also to send to the brothers’ group chat to brag

asmo responds to each one with even more heart emojis than the last, levi always has some kind of jealous comment to make, lucifer stays silent (satan knows he’s saving the photos to his own gallery to gaze affectionately at later though), and mammon just keeps sending angry stickers and then quickly adding that they’re not aimed at you but at satan for having the audacity

anyway, the four of you end up leaving the giant carnivorous cow exhibit after spending a few minutes just sitting together on one of the giant benches while you and beel (mostly beel) eat the giant pile of food he purchased

(beel’s not evil so he offers satan and belphie some obviously, but he makes it clear that you’re getting first pick)

beel’s about to ask where you want to head next when

here comes trouble

and make it double

asmo and levi are IN the building (zoo)

levi, having gotten so antsy waiting for you to show up, disregards all subtlety and basically throws himself right at you, scoops you up, and takes off

leaving behind your poor manticore plush, a stunned satan, beel, belphie, and asmo, who immediately starts running after the two of you, shouting ‘hey, that isn’t fair!’

satan, belphie and beel are left to exchange disbelieving looks and attempt to follow

(don't worry about greenie, satan picks him up and vows to keep him safe until he meets up with you again)

meanwhile you are being quite literally swept off your feet

“levi. levi stop i can walk. levi i’m coming to aquarium with you. you don’t need to pull me. levi i’m getting a little dizzy over here. levi please”

luckily you are saved from your impending doom (because, realistically, there is no way mr hasn’t-exercised-in-several-millennia can carry someone halfway across the biggest zoo in all three realms without tripping) by asmo

now, asmo does not like exercise. it makes him all hot and sweaty (and not in the sexy way) and it’s just... not it. however, because it’s you, he will make an exception just this once.

so he grits his teeth, pins back his long-ass fringe with a cute butterfly clip, and runs for it

normally jealous-mode levi will not stop for anything, but a running asmo in the right situation is even more terrifying than a quiet angry lucifer, and a quiet angry lucifer normally means multiple people are getting burnt alive

so what does levi do? naturally, he stops in his tracks, lets out a scream of such a high frequency that he disturbs a flock of deathseye hawks nesting in a tree nearby, and almost drops you on your head

asmo immediately stops running, takes a moment to dab off any sweat on his forehead with his dainty little pink handkerchief, and lets his hair back down

because he is not exercising for a second longer than he has to

anyway, now that you’re not being torpedo’d halfway across the world, you can finally take a second to breathe and actually ask levi what he wants

he goes pink and stares shame-facedly at the ground and refuses to say a word, especially with avatar of lust ‘i like teasing my brothers to the point where it might be sexual harassment’ asmodeus Right There behind you

but you want your purple boy to be honest!! which means it is puppy dog eyes time again

finally, staring determinedly off to the side, levi mumbles, “you promised we’d go see the fish...”

oh your poor heart

you’re inclined to start pressing kisses all over his face, but you just know he will immediately blow up on the spot if you do in such a public area, so you settle on giving him a subtle hug and reassuring him that yes, you will go see the fish with him

now, asmo’s a hoe for attention, we all know that, but even he has his moments

so, making you promise to go see the birds of arcadia with him later, he departs with a wave and a very sneaky kiss planted on your cheek to let you and levi have your time together

thanks asmo

so off you and levi go!

the aquarium FUCKS

sorry that was too strong

the aquarium is GORGEOUS

it’s got this beautiful deep blue-green ambient lighting, and there are enormous tanks for the giant sharks that essentially make up the walls and ceiling

and there are SO MANY FISH!

rainbow fish, neon pink fish, fish with tiny markings that make them look like they have moustaches, fish with scales that change colour every five seconds, glow-in-the-dark fish, fish the size of a small car

literally any kind of fish you can imagine? they HAVE THEM

you’re almost too distracted to notice levi tugging aggressively on your sleeve

when you do, though, he quickly ushers you over into the tunnel exhibit, where the dolphins live

devildom dolphins look pretty similar to regular human dolphins, except they live in what’s essentially hydrochloric acid and are pitch black in colour with bright purple eyes

you’re pretty confused as to why levi wanted to drag you in here so quickly - you’d have thought he’d go for the goldfish, or the venomous water serpents, or even the special hydra exhibit they’ve got for a limited time

but then levi pulls you over to the very edge, taps his fingers lightly on the glass, and... starts clicking and chirruping?

you’re about to very concernedly ask if he’s feeling alright when something amazing happens

the giant male with scars all over it who, according to one of the signs along the tunnel, spends most of his time skulking as far away from the glass as possible and will eat any demon who comes too close, swims over to him

then, wearing the gentlest little smile, levi turns to you and tells you to say hello to captain

you almost yell out of sheer excitement, but you manage to collect yourself

instead, what comes out is an aggressively whispered:

"hello!! hi, captain!! it's lovely to meet you!! i love you!!!!"

and captain loves you too!!!!!

he swims right up to you and butts his nose against the glass

well you can't not immediately press your face against the glass as well so it looks like you're bumping noses with him can you???

so you do exactly that

all the while going "hello!! hello!! you're such a pretty boy!! what a handsome boy!!"

levi almost cries because you are just too perfect

you love captain? and captain loves you too? he seriously has to hold himself back from dropping to one knee and proposing right then and there

after taking a moment to get his heart to calm down, he translates what you're saying to captain, who immediately starts clicking back

and guess what??? captain says you're the prettiest!!!!!!!!! you’re the handsomest!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

now you're going to cry

you and levi spend ages in that tunnel together, just talking to captain and holding hands and exchanging little kisses now and then

levi is so in his element here in the aquarium that he isn't even as nervous and stuttery with his affection as usual

it's almost jarring, but are you complaining? absolutely not

when and levi emerge from the aquarium, both a little giddy and still enthusiastically talking about all the other creatures you said hi to after captain (who you are most definitely coming back to visit sometime), asmo is waiting outside so impatiently that he's getting a lot of irritated looks for his aggressive foot-tapping

levi wants to go see the reptiles now, but then asmo plays the 'i let you get away with having alone time, now let me have mine, bitch’ card

and to be honest levi's pretty sure that even self-proclaimed romance expert asmo can't top the mini-aquarium date you've just had with him, sooooo...

buying you a little keychain replica of captain just to get a final one over his brother, he bids you goodbye and goes off to the reptile house on his own, pulling on his headphones on his way so that he won't accidentally end up talking to some stranger again

it is now asmo's time to shine!!!

and so off the two of you head off to the birds of arcadia exhibit

however, it seems that asmo doesn’t have much interest in the birds themselves apart from for taking pictures with them for his devilgram

the birds are beautiful indeed, but guess what else is also beautiful? here is a short and concise list:

1. holding asmo’s hand

2. giving asmo kisses

3. receiving kisses from asmo

4. giving asmo hugs

5. receiving hugs from asmo

6. cuddling with asmo

7. sleeping with asmo (in the literal sense)

8. sleeping with asmo (in the not so litera—)

this has been a short and concise list of things that are very beautiful and you should absolutely do right this second (not ghost-written by asmodeus, avatar of lust, not at all)

anyway, it’s kind of hard to concentrate on that adorable neon striped pecker sitting close by to you when asmo is draping himself all over you like a damn scarf

it’s cute! it’s cute. but.... the birds...... you want to see the birds.........

in the end the two of you settle on a compromise: asmo will let you have some time to just look at the pretty birds as long as you keep holding his hand, and then the two of you will go and get matching face paint together

asmo’s kinda pouty about it at first, but he quickly changes his mind when he sees how enamoured you are by the birds

you really are too cute!! he just wants to scoop you up and cover you with kisses, but he’s already promised to leave that for when you aren’t in the middle of a busy public space

(he definitely isn’t the slightest bit jealous of them because he wants to be the only beautiful thing that you look at like that. he knows he’s prettier than those birds.)

(but, like... he’s still gonna puff up his chest a bit when he catches one edging just a bit too close to you. he may be the avatar of lust, but he does have his moments of jealousy as well… even if they’re at blooming birds.)

finally, when you’ve decided that you’ve had your fill of gorgeous birds, asmo immediately pulls you off to the face-painting booth

all the designs the demons managing it have come up with are pretty beautiful, so he’s not bothered about which one to get as long as you two are matching

which means you get to choose!!!!

at first he thinks you’ll ask for the super popular one that imitates the feather pattern of the most popular bird of arcadia, the lesser spotted spectra

but then you turn to look at him, think for a moment, turn back to the demon doing the painting, and ask if they do custom designs

asmo can only watch on, confused, as you and the demon whisper conspiratorially back and forth for five minutes

then the demon has started painting, and the cheeky little grin on your face is making him a little worried that you’ve deliberately asked for a really stupid design just to mess with him

but then, as the strokes and colours all come together, he realises something that might make him a little teary eyed. just a little bit.

the design you’ve asked for just so happens to be the gorgeous, swirling pattern of the avatar of lust’s pact mark

and it’s not just that, either. he takes a closer look and realises that the little flowers added around the edges are his favourite kind of rose as well

and THEN the demon doing the painting turns to him and tells him with a smirk that, by your suggestion, the paint he’s using has been enchanted so that it goes rainbow when you kiss the person who’s wearing it

oh, he really should have had more faith in you! this is even better than anything he could come up with!!!

(he takes about a million photos of you while he’s waiting for his own turn and sends at least a quarter of them to the group chat)

asmo is practically vibrating with excitement as he sits there getting his own face painted

and if you think he doesn’t drag you off to some secluded corner for a good half an hour just pressing little kisses all over your face and giggling when he pulls away and your face paint has gone all the colours of the rainbow, you are severely wrong

of course, he wants kisses as well. this is a give-and-take system and he wants just as much as he gives!!!

unfortunately, there is one disadvantage to spending so much time just canoodling

the others haven’t heard from you or asmo in a good hour and they are beginning to PANIC

mammon in particular is practically shooting off the walls and just constantly spamming you with ‘WHERE ARE YOU’ and ‘COME BACK’ messages

asmo doesn’t want you to go but he’s also kind of running off a high right now so he decides it’s okay and sends you off you find mammon with a cheery wave (and a love struck sigh once you’re out of earshot)

you find mammon just walking in circles in the communal area outside the cannibalistic not-zebras exhibit

he almost bursts into tears when you come up to him and tap him on the shoulder because it feels like he hasn’t seen you for what feels like hours and hours and he just,,, he missed you okay

after five minutes of him just furiously rubbing his eyes and refusing to admit why, he gathers himself and asks you what you want to go see

you have to think for a good long while because, while you’ve been to plenty of zoos in the human world and know by now the sorts of animals most of them have, devildom creature species are unpredictable

you could jokingly say ‘hyper-aware empathetic goose’ and they’d probably have one

but then you have a look around you and see the big map

and what is the first thing you see on that map?

‘vampiric venomous bats’

oh fuck yeah

mammon is a little concerned because the vvbs are known to randomly swoop down and attack the people who walk into their exhibit

he knows you can protect yourself!! but when you’re being swarmed by a horde of more than fifty giant bat creatures with enormous teeth full of venom that can kill you in seconds, there’s really not much you can do

and there is no expressing the amount of absolute misery that would descend on him if he let you get hurt

so instead, you make a compromise and decide to go to scheduled talk on the vvbs in ten minutes instead

normally mammon finds these zoo talks boring as all hell, but heck, if he gets to hold your hand for a whole forty five minutes without having to make an excuse to do so, he’s down

so off you go to the talk!

you’re having the absolute time of your life as the keeper shows you one of the more lethargic bats and describes exactly how it paralyses its prey with high frequency screeches and then kills it with a single bite to the neck

mammon, on the other hand, is honestly kind of spooked

that bat may be half-asleep, but it’s got the eyes of a murderer

so what if he shuffles a little closer to you every time the bat moves?? it’s not like he’s scared of it or anything! no way!

(please hold him or he may cry)

but then... DISASTER strikes

the keeper looks out across her bright-eyed audience, listening attentively to her explanation of how the vvb detects prey through the slightest vibrations in the air... and asks if there are any volunteers who want to hold it

everyone goes quiet. they’re all looking at the floor and avoiding eye contact like students who don’t want to be picked to answer a question in class. they may be demons, but even they know danger when they see it.

except...

mammon is just commenting to himself in amusement about how quiet everyone’s gotten when he looks to the side and practically feels his heart freeze

your hand has flown straight up into the air, and before he can pull it down, the keeper has called on you

mammon may be just as terrified of that bat as everyone else, but he isn’t going to let you go near that thing without him to protect you

the keeper looks a little befuddled as to why one of the most powerful demons in the devildom is following you up to the front like a very attached duckling, but luckily she goes along with it

first she gives you a super thick dragonhide glove to wear, just in case the bat gets violent

then she attaches the little lead around one of the bat’s feet to the end of the glove, so that even if it tries to attack an uncovered spot on your body, it’ll just get pulled back

(meanwhile, mammon, standing just behind you, is just barely holding back from bursting into demon form and wrapping himself around you to protect you)

and so, as you watch in anticipation and mammon in terror, the keeper slowly moves the bat from her arm to yours

at first it just kind of sits there and blinks and... doesn’t really do much

the keeper, however, seems very happy about this

“it means she already trusts you!!!”

and she tells you to try a simple little trick

“just flick your wrist up and she should swing down to hang from your hand!”

mammon is very pointedly whispering to you that that’s enough, you’ve held the bat, come on let’s get out of here

but you are determined to continue putting your life in danger, it seems, because you do exactly what the keeper says

and it works!!!

piki, which you have learned is the name of this particular bat, lets out a quiet squeak and drops to hang from one of the enormous fingers of your glove

you immediately go ‘wooAAAAAAAAAH’

mammon almost bites his tongue in half because of how on edge he is, but it turns out that he doesn’t need to be

because the bat turns to you, blinks once, and suddenly puffs up around the neck

you panic a little at first, but the keeper seems incredibly excited

“she’s displaying!!!!!!! she likes you!!!!!!!!!!! she sees you as a potential mate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

okay mammon is not having any of that

he is not about to be upstaged by a goddamn bat

and so the instant the bat and glove is removed from you, he grabs you by the hand and charges right out of that room, shouting something about it being urgent

leaving poor piki the vampiric venomous bat squeaking sadly because her new crush is gone

sad :(

now mammon is buying you a giant plush to make up for dragging you away like that

happy! :)

and you KNOW this means a great deal because mammon does not part with his money very easily. in fact, most of the time, one would have to physically threaten him into buying something for them

and the fact that mammon bought you a ridiculously expensive enormous plush that probably dug a pretty big hole in his savings without you even asking??? your heart basically melts on the spot

now you definitely can’t get angry at him for pulling you away so suddenly

so instead the two of you go to see the giant narwhals

you’re fascinated, but mammon is too distracted to even look at the narwhals

he just keeps staring at you looking so happy hugging the giant plush he bought for you so close to yourself with this giant dopey grin on his face

(s i m p)

he’s shaken out of his infatuated daze when he hears a camera shutter directly behind him

at first he whips around ready to fight because he’s expecting levi or asmo, but then he looks up slightly and comes face to face with none other than his beloved older brother

lucifer doesn’t even try to hide the tiny grin on his face as he very slowly raises his phone and takes a photo of mammon’s half shocked and half irritated face

mammon is so dumbfounded by how much kinder lucifer looks when he smiles like that. he doesn’t even recover in time to tell you who’s just showed up - you end up noticing by yourself

you should have given lucifer a bit of warning because the moment you turn around and and greet him with such a bright and happy smile on his face he is DECEASED

all you and mammon see is his cheeks going pink but let me tell you this man is screeching like a trapped possum on the inside

lucifer may act like he’s a Big Important Unfeeling Demon but everyone else knows that this man would quite literally bring you the moon if you asked (he probably wouldn’t be able to pull down the entire moon, but damn him if he isn’t going to try)

he has to stay silent for a moment because he knows that if he speaks his voice is going to crack and mammon absolutely would NOT let him forget that for the rest of his long life

once he’s managed to get his puddle of a heart back to a state where he can speak without sounding like the physical embodiment of being smitten, he’s quick to offer to take you to the nearby penguin exhibit

he’s paid attention to the messages he’s been receiving periodically from the other brothers throughout the day about the things you’ve been getting up to with them, and he has seen a pattern in the sort of creatures you like the best

that pattern is: the more deadly, the better, with bonus points if it still looks cute

and lucifer has been to this zoo enough times to know most of the best exhibits pretty well (especially since diavolo’s taste in deadly creatures is very similar to yours, so he knows that any of the demon prince’s favourites will probably end up pretty high in your list as well)

therefore he knows that the devildom’s penguins are about two and a half meters tall, with millions of retractable fangs in their beaks and venom sacs in their necks that they can spray so violently and quickly that they’ve become known as ‘venom machine guns’

and you are ALL ABOUT THAT

you’re so excited by the concept of these penguins that you don’t think twice before tucking your arm into lucifer’s outstretched one and following him off to the exhibit

leaving mammon pouting furiously behind the two of you

now, while the avatar of greed doesn’t dare to directly interfere with his older brother, he most certainly dares to inconvenience him

what does that mean? it means that mammon is immediately whipping out his DDD and shooting a quick message to the group chat specifically made without lucifer to let everyone know what’s going down

and, within ten minutes, every single one of the other brothers are heading right for the penguin exhibit as well

lucifer is in the middle of listening to you excitedly talk about piki the bat when he feels something hit him in the back

he turns to see, with great dismay, that the six other brothers have started following behind the two of you, and have begun taking turns throwing things at him. satan doesn’t stop even when he realises that he’s been spotted.

lucifer feels a vein pop in his cheek when satan manages to nail him right in the middle of the forehead with a screwed-up ball of paper

unfortunately for lucifer (and fortunately for the other six brothers), you quickly take notice of the group following behind you

the avatar of pride can only watch in dismay as you call out for the others to come join you to see the penguins

well, obviously, the others are coming now that you’re inviting them over!!

asmo immediately jumps to give you a little kiss on the nose just so he can see your face light up in all the colours of the rainbow again

(which earns several surprised noises from the other brothers since, while they knew from the pictures from asmo that the two of you had gotten your faces painted, they didn’t know the paint did that)

belphie subtly shuffles up behind you to give you a little prize figurine he spent way too long trying to win on one of the zoo’s mini claw-machine games, while beel attempts to find a stealthy way of sneaking the bag of treats he’s carefully sourced for you into your pockets, but ends up giving up on that and just hands you the bag instead

levi is still on a bit of a high from the mini aquarium date, so his face immediately goes fifty shades of red when he sees you, but instead of running off like he usually does when he’s flustered, he just offers you the WIDEST smile

satan is a little disheartened when he realises just how much bigger the plushie mammon got for you is than greenie... but who cares!! greenie is small and cute!! he most definitely isn’t puffing up slightly like an indignant owl when he sees you hug that plushie to yourself like it’s the softest thing in the world!! no sir!!!!!!

mammon is being kinda whiny about lucifer barging in and ruining your one and one time together, but then satan reminds him that they’ve all just interrupted lucifer’s one on one time with you before it could even really begin, and also points out (a little saltily) that, judging by the giant plushie in your arms, he’s already spent more than enough time with you

(luckily mammon isn’t exactly perceptive so he doesn’t pick up on it or else satan would be in for one hell of a teasing)

you, meanwhile, don’t miss the way that lucifer not so subtly presses himself closer to you as the eight of you are walking to see the penguins

so close that your arms are physically touching

it’s not like lucifer to be this clingy (well, clingy by his standards, anyway), but you aren’t going to bring it up considering that he would probably immediately move away out of ~pride~ if you did

unfortunately the other brothers don’t need you to point out lucifer’s behaviour to immediately start attempting to sabotage him

by the time you all get to the penguin exhibit, you’re surrounded completely by all seven of them, and they appear to be executing a genuine attempt to crush you if the pressure on all sides is anything to go off of

looking on the bright side of things, though, the penguins are SO CUTE

sure, they’re about nine feet tall with beaks full of millions of tiny serrated teeth and very toxic-looking feet-claws. but they’re ADORABLE

you love them so much!!!!!! but now the brothers are being big MEANIES and aren’t letting you get close to the fence

“those penguins can shoot venom up to twenty feet, we’re not taking any chances” so WHAT you just want to see the goddamn penguins!!!!!!!! you’ve survived countless near-death experiences down here, you can manage a bit of venom!

eventually your very pointed complaining finally gets most of them to relent (asmo is still against it, but majority vote says you get to get closer to the penguins, so HA) and you are allowed to go right up to barrier that separates the attraction from the spectators

you’re absolutely delighted, but the brothers quickly realise that their concerns about this whole thing were not unfounded

because that fucking penguin over there is totally giving you the googly eyes

levi is the first to notice - as the general of hell’s navy, he has a natural connection to all animals of the seas, even the ones that are only semi aquatic

satan notices soon after him - he’s been to plenty of ‘taming dangerous creatures’ club meetings, and he knows how to recognise attraction in animals

you yourself are pretty clueless until you suddenly notice that one of the flock is now sliding beak-first on its belly towards you

levi silently hopes you’ll be scared into leaving, but instead you just lean right up to the barrier (lucifer hurriedly grabs you by the arm before you fall over it) and whisper-shriek “hi baby!!!!!!!!!!!”

oh the brothers did not like that at all

but the penguin seems absolutely THRILLED

you’re pretty sure you see its eyes light up. like physically light up, not in the metaphorical sense - its eyes glow

(do devildom penguins understand human/demon speech?? you could swear from the penguin’s reaction to your greeting that they do, but when you ask satan about it later, he just scowls and shakes his head, proclaiming that devildom penguins have ‘a brain smaller than a tangerine and the motor function of a slightly bent paper clip’)

(damn satan you didn’t have to do the penguins like that)

anyway, this penguin, now thoroughly convinced that you are its destiny, hops to its feet, nods its head several times, then proceeds to start making the weirdest noise at you

you don’t even know how to describe it. it’s like a laser beam has been combined with a motorbike combined with a vacuum cleaner combined with levi when his favourite idol group releases a new song combined with that godawful screeching violin satan has been playing on repeat for two weeks just to annoy lucifer combined with, i don’t know, a turbo-charged printer or something. and then the whole thing’s been shoved through a dubstep filter.

it’s such a rattling sound that asmo, mammon, levi and belphie clap their hands to their ears, beel frowns so hard his entire face squishes inwards, satan recoils so far backwards that he’s about two feet further away from you than he was at first, and even lucifer actually physically flinches

(short break for a personal headcanon of mine but hear me out here: this man probably listens to nothing but full professional orchestra classical all day. he absolutely has that thing where his ears are sensitive to poorly played notes or just harsh grating sounds in general. you know, like how lan wangji and lan xichen in mdzs are physically repulsed by the sound of bad music? yeah that)

you wince slightly, but the pain in your eardrums is overpowered by your thrill about the fact that this penguin is actually talking to you

you smile wide and reply, leaning right up to the banister, “hello!! hi!! it's nice to meet you too!!”

if the penguin was happy before then it’s absolutely over the MOON now

it makes the weird honking sound again, nodding its head furiously at you, all the while shuffling closer and closer to the barrier

you are positively delighted by this development, but each of the demon brothers seem to be taking the penguin’s approach as a personal threat both to them and to you

beel’s expression is steadily scrunching up more and more in displeasure as each second passes, asmo’s glare could probably boil the penguin alive, and you’re pretty sure you just heard levi hiss at it

you turn around to try to tell them off for getting jealous over a penguin out of all things, but they are just not listening to reason

the penguin meanwhile is desperately trying to get your attention back by nodding even more frantically and honking so loudly that lucifer actually reels back a little

you try to turn back to it but then belphie decides that he’s going to shove his way right between you and the barrier and block the penguin’s line of sight

the penguin immediately sets up an extremely loud complaint, but belphie refuses to give it any rope at all

at this point the other brothers begin catching onto what he’s doing

mostly because of his weird twin telepathy thing, beel is the first to join belphie’s quest, with his giant frame being substantially more effective as a barrier, while asmo and satan work together to not-so-subtly start ushering the entire group backwards and away from the penguin

you’re attempting to protest, but lucifer is practically shouting over you about how interesting and fun you’ll find the giant giraffe exhibit, which just so happens to be on the other side of the zoo

the penguin is positively screeching at this point, but a moment later is suddenly goes silent. for a moment you’re afraid that one of the brothers have lost their nerve and actually killed it, but then you manage to spot it sliding away again around beel’s massive shoulder

turns out that, though his brothers don’t seem to care about his status and power placement at all, the avatar of greed’s glare is enough to silence even the most passionate of penguins

while the brothers exchange triumphant looks as they lead you away from the penguin exhibit, though, you’re more than a little upset by this whole ordeal.

the disrespect? abundant. the lack of sympathy? rampant. the audacity? sheer.

you make your displeasure very clear by scrunching up your face, crossing your arms, and refusing to respond to any of the brothers when they try to ask you something

goddammit, it was supposed to be a good thing that they saved you from the so obviously dangerous penguin, but now you’ve got them feeling bad

in the end, though, you still can’t stay mad at your boys for long

they all apologise (well, all of them except lucifer, whose pride will forever be his downfall, and belphie, who genuinely doesn’t think he’s done anything particularly wrong), and you can’t bring yourself to keep dampening the mood

so, with a short scolding that’s really little more than a light slap to the wrist to remind the boys that you don’t need to be protected from everything like some sort of delicate glass case despite how much they might think that’s the case, you’re back to your previous happy self

thank fuck

the rest of the day goes smoothly! the eight of you do indeed go to see the giant giraffes, which you actually get to feed, and beel somehow manages to knock down an entire row of rigged carnival targets to get you a pretty wooden carving of a super cool dragon

(you’re still not entirely sure how that happened but it was probably the sheer willpower)

you convince all of the brothers to take about three hundred photos with you in the cheesy green screen safari booths (it was mostly levi, lucifer and belphie who needed convincing, since beel and satan weren’t too fussed about it either way, and mammon and asmo were downright thrilled to do so)

lucifer buys the whole group matching keychains, despite the fact that they were pretty basic wood-and-plastic affairs but still cost a good fifty grimm each

(you’ve noticed that he seems to like doing that, considering the harrison porter keychain you’ve still got from that trip up to the human world back during the whole body swap fiasco)

he gets himself a fire-breathing peacock, mammon gets a gold-hoarding crow, levi gets a sea serpent, satan gets a good old regular cat, asmo gets a lesser spotted spectra, beel gets a manticore (since they’re known to eat more than three times their body mass on good days), belphie gets a giant carnivorous cow, and he begrudgingly lets you pick out the giant penguin design - as an apology for his actions earlier.

(you don’t fail to notice the slightly irritated looks levi and satan in turn both send the keychain as you tuck it safely into your pocket)

all in all

a lovely day out

10/10 would do again

[xeulousluv]

My Girl

Part one of the mini series My Girl

AN: Fair warning, this story takes place in 2020, but for the sake of the storyline I have made to where Covid never happened. Now I am aware that this topic is a huge one, which is why I want to remind all of you to be safe out there!

Pairing: Harry Styles x Reader 

Genre: Fluff and some angst

Word Count: 4.2k

Screams of joy quickly filled the room as soon as the pastor said the infamous words, you may now kiss the bride. There they were, two kids from the outskirts of Manhattan, saying their I do’s and finalising their committed love to each other.

The beginning of the day was messy and rushed, fear laced in the air as no one knew how the day would play out. Leave it up to Daniel to be late to his own wedding, forty-five minutes to be exact, so instead of him waiting down at the end of the aisle for Zoey to walk down, she was the one waiting on him.

You had met Zoey your freshman year of college when you two first became roommates. During that time you thought she was too chirpy and loud, but soon come to realise that she would become a huge factor in your life, six years later.

Daniel came into the picture three years ago, they had met in the most cliche way possible, at a rollerskating rink. She didn’t want to spend her twenty-first birthday in the typical bar scene, Zoey wasn’t like that, she quite literally despised alcohol.

The moment they said I do, tears slowly formed at the bridges of your eyes. Part of it was because of how happy you are for her, how ecstatic for her to start this new chapter in her life. But the other part, the more selfish one, wanted her all to yourself. You wanted it to be you, her, and Cadence for the rest of your lives. However, Zoey did inform you that no matter what it was you and her against the world, you just added a few more souls to it.

Later that night when everyone was sitting around the room eating their food, you found it the perfect time to say your speech. The same speech you rewrote ten different times because it just wasn’t good enough. So, like in the movies, you stood up with a spoon in one hand and your glass of sparkling cyder in the other, and slowly clanked the two together gathering everyone’s undivided attention.

“Hello everyone.” As all eyes turned your way, you had to clear your throat a little with how intimidating this is. They never tell you how nerve-racking it is to give a speech in the movies. “As some of you may know, my name is Y/N Y/L/N, the bridesmaid and unfortunately one of Zoey’s only friends.” Laughs erupted through the room, considering everyone knew how anti-social Zoey actually is.

“I just wanted to start off by saying first and foremost, a huge thank you to everyone who came and made this day as magical and mesmerising for our lovely couple over here. Ever since the day Zoey and Danny met, it’s been a nonstop rollercoaster of emotions, but in the best way possible. I still remember the time Zoey told me she thought she was in love with him, it was just two days after our lives changed drastically. She came up to me and was like, “I never knew I could hold this much love for someone, but here I am. I think I love Danny and that scares the shit out of me.”

“She was full of nerves for a whole week after that. But one day she came home smiling like an idiot claiming that he loved her too, the rest is history. Zoe, as much as I tease you about your quote unquote, school girl crush, I couldn’t possibly explain how happy I am for you and Daniel. I just hope he treats you the way you treat literally everyone in your life. And these past two and a half years have been a huge adjustment for me, and I just want to thank the both of you for never letting me go through it alone. I love you guys. To Zoey and Daniel!”

Cheers broke out and champagne glasses echoed, Zoey stood up and pulled you into a huge bear hug, explaining over and over how much you mean to her. By this point in the night, it would’ve been the second time you cried, had you not felt the small tug at the bottom of your dress.

There on the chair beside you sat the most beautiful girl in the room, Cadence Y/L/N. She was buckled onto a small booster seat that was sat on the chair, a slight frown taking over her face as there was no more food on her plate.

You had Cadence two and a half years ago, when you were twenty-two, hence the sentence in your speech. Her father abandoned you the second he found out about the pregnancy, typical college boys. They aren’t ready to become fathers so instead they leave, but you were never going to give up the chance to give your baby the life they deserved. Maybe it wasn’t supposed to happen this way, but if you could go back and do it all over again, you would in a heartbeat. However, you would do a couple things totally differently.

“Mommy, I want up.” She had pouted out, with only being nearly three, she really knew how to speak. As if you could ever say no to her and her little pouts, you unbuckled her booster and lifted her on your hip. Zoey smiled as she gave Cadence a soft kiss to the head before announcing that she was going to talk to some family members. “What’s up, babe? How was your dinner?”

Cadence smiled, holding up her thumbs in the cutest way possible. That is until she whispered in your ear, “Mommy I have to go potty.” Cadence was never shy, but she did hate having her business out in public, and even though she isn’t fully potty trained yet, you love the fact that she’s telling you when she needs to go. Because you know that there will come a day that she won’t need to depend on you anymore, she will have her own life. That’s a thought you never wanted to wrap your head around.

Having made your way to the bathroom, you helped Cadence hold her dress up as she did her business. She really was the cutest flower girl you have ever seen, plus Zoey’s mom did an outstanding job with putting flowers in her long and blonde braided hair. A true princess, she was.

“Okay mommy, I’m done. Can we wash the yuckies away now?” Her doe-like eyes looked up at you, and sometimes you forget that she is only two, and the fact that she’s yours. All yours. No one else’s. “Yes baby, let’s pull up your big girl undies real quick, okay?” And having expected it to come, your daughter replied with, “I’m a big girl now mommy!”

She still couldn’t properly pronounce her R’s yet, but the daycare she’s in is working on it. Turning the water to a lukewarm temperature, you lifted Cadence up to the sink where she would get her soap and wash the yuckies away.

When she was done washing her hands, you set her down and both made your way back out to the party hand in hand. Everyone was dancing now, Zoey was with a few of her aunts and Daniel was probably out on the balcony having a smoke. “Hey Liz, can you watch Cady for a few minutes? I need a breather.” 

Elizabeth Walters, the mother of now, Zoey Green. Liz loved both you and Cadence, basically adopting you the second you set foot into her luxurious house. You knew Zoey came from a long line of money, but seeing it so up close and personal felt like a dream.

“Of course, love. You know I could never say no to this cute little face.” Liz squished the cheeks of your daughter before grabbing her hand and leading them both away from you. Undoubtedly going towards the dessert table where Cadence has been eyeing all night.

As soon as Cady was in the safe hands of Liz, you made your way out to the balcony where low and behold, Daniel was sitting and admiring the view. “Hey you, shouldn’t you be with your wife?” You spoke up, Daniel was surely intimidated by you at first, having been his girlfriend's best friend, he wanted your approval. Though after a few months you both warmed up to each other and are now as close as ever. “Yeah, just needed a bit of a break is all.”

Daniel led his right hand over to you, where he was silently asking if you wanted a hit from his cigarette, which you gratefully obliged. “Everything okay?” You looked at him, eyeing the side of his face while the smoke you just inhaled settled it’s way down your throat.

“I just can’t believe I’m married, Lace I’m married!” Lace was a nickname he came up with the day he found you dancing around your apartment in nothing but your lace bra and underwear. To be fair, he was looking for Zoey and you happened to be cleaning the house while singing to Avril Lavinge’s, Skater Boi.

“It’s crazy, isn’t it? I mean one minute you’re planning your whole future then you blink once and it turns out you are now living it.” Daniel laughed, giving him back his cigarette, you placed your arms on the balcony edge. “I love her so fucking much that my heart physically hurts, I just don’t want to mess it all up. I mean what if, in five years she doesn’t want me anymore? I will be torn.”

“Danny, you know you can’t get into your head about this kind of stuff. Zoey loves you, I’ve known it since the day we met. The way she would talk about you, her eyes would light up and a huge smile would appear on her face. She adores you, man. And I know I don’t say it much, but I am so grateful for all you do. You brought my Zoey back, the carefree and adventurous Zoey I knew before her dad died. I love you, Zoey loves you, and Cadence definitely loves you. Seriously dude, what did you do to her to get her to love you more than me?”

It was nights like these where you would feel closest to Daniel, nights where you fully take in how much he has done for you and your best friend. Daniel put out the cigarette in his hand and turned your way, “I’m just cooler than you, remember? I got a shirt that says cool uncle for a reason.” And like nothing happened before, the both of you were back to joking and laughing. “Alright, now if you don’t mind me, I have got a wife to get back to.”

You sent him a smile before following him back inside to go find your girl.

When you finally found her, she was dancing with Liz and her boyfriend Arttie, some evidence of chocolate on the corner of her mouth. “Hey, sorry about that. I can take her now.” You picked Cadence up and sat her on your hip, kissing all over her face before she let out a mommy stop!

Liz was adoringly looking at the interaction, clearly not understanding why you thought you were failing as a mother. “Nonsense love, she was an angel as always. You love hanging out with grandma Liz, don’t ya little one?” Her attention now turned to the two year old who gave her a huge smile and a nod that matches said smile. “I just feel bad for putting her off on you for something as stupid this. I usually don’t do it, but I needed to speak to Daniel anyway.”

Your mom was never really in your life when it came to moving out and onto college. You grew up in a small and messed up town in Pennsylvania, your mother was an alcoholic and your father was, well he’s a story for another day. “Y/n, I can assure you that everything is fine, I love having you guys around and if that means watching your daughter while you go have a smoke, then so be it.”

Instead of saying anything, you leaned in and gave Liz a hug that Cadence found her way into, still on your hip. The position was awkward but the gesture itself was one full of love. “Mommy, it’s our song! Dance with me please?”

And as if your heart couldn’t get anymore full when We Fell in Love in October came on, it swarmed with warmth at Cadence’s words. “Of course, baby. You are my girl aren't you?” The giggle Cadence let out was one of the utmost amazing sounds you have ever heard, you could listen to it on repeat for the rest of your life. “Yes mommy, your girl.”

With that, you led yourself and Cadence to the dance floor and started dancing around, not having a care in the world if you looked ridiculous. Right now, at this moment, it was you and your daughter. That is all you needed. Smiles took over your faces, and only widened when you saw a camera on your dancing figures.

“Smile for the camera, baby!” And she did, you both looked at the camera, waves, and smiled all while still dancing to the beat of the moment.

When the music slowed to an end, you and Cadence continued dancing for a few more songs before she announced that she was tired. So again, you picked her up and let her slowly fall asleep on your chest. Even though Cadence wouldn’t remember this day when she grows up, you will always remember every second of it.

“You look like you could use a drink, but that little munch there kind of prevents that doesn’t it?” It had been an hour and you were sitting at your table with a sleeping baby attached to you. When the voice was heard behind you, you kind of struggled to turn your head but the man made it easier when he moved to stand in front of you.

“I would if I drank. It’s not really my thing, ya know?” He was attractive, short brown hair and emerald green eyes, but was he really your type? Probably not, you went for guys with longer hair, but you couldn’t deny the natural beauty of him. “‘S understandable love, this seat taken? Do you mind if I sit?”

His accent was more than endearing, entrancing even, though he sounded fairly familiar. “No of course not, it’s all yours. I’m Y/n, I would shake your hand but I’m a little occupied.” You introduced yourself, laughing out as you pointed at the sleeping baby in your arms. He laughed along with you, and had you had a drink in your mouth, it would be all over the front of you at the sound. It was perfect.

“’M Harry. She’s a peaceful sleeper, that one. Are you just watching her?” This was the moment that you would say she is actually your daughter and he would run for the hills. So you gave a fake smile and a sigh, “Something like that, she’s mine.”

As you expected, his eyes widened in shock. You look so young? But he wasn’t about to judge you. “Seriously? That’s awesome, I hope you don’t take this as offensive, but I thought she was just your little sister.” However, that was not expected, him to stay, but you had time. “You flatter me, Harry. I had her young, a little younger than I would’ve hoped, but now that I have, I’m over the moon. She’s the most perfect baby. Sorry I’m rambling.” You stopped yourself before things got too weird.

Instead you opted to play with Cadence’s hair that was now out of the brain and drained of the flowers. You loved playing with her hair, in fact you loved all physical contact with her, cuddling at night was a definite must. “Never apologize for talking about the things you love. Or I guess in this case, the people you love. I find it charming that you talk about her, it goes to show how much you love her.”

When you looked back up at Harry you found his eyes already on yours, a soft smile playing at his face. And even though you hadn’t meant to do it, a slight heat rose to your cheeks. No one, more precisely no guy, has ever said that to you. “I do. I love her so much.”

“You know, I heard your speech earlier, it was really sweet. I’m guessing you and Zoey are close then?” Cadence starts rolling around on your chest before getting comfortable again this time her head layed on your left shoulder, facing the side of your neck, her soft breaths fanning over you. “Closer than ever, really. She was there for me when I wasn’t even there for myself. Could never repay her. What about you, who are you here for?”

“Daniel, we’ve been mates since we were sixteen almost. Met on a show I was filming.” A show? That’s a change for people you usually talk to. “So you’re an actor then?”

A smirk played at his lips, his fingers playing with his bottom lip. “Something like that, I’m a singer, but I have filmed a movie or two.” He spoke, replying back what you said to him. To say it shocked you was the understatement of the year. You hadn’t even been to an actual concert in your life, let alone met someone famous. Wait, was he famous?

“That’s crazy, anything I would know?” Genuinely curious, you eye his movements. He now had his left arm on the table while the right was lifted towards his left hand and played with his rings. You hadn’t even seen the rings that were splayed on almost every finger, you had to say, it was incredibly hot. A bonus, his nails were painted a dark shade of blue.

He must’ve noticed your staring because a laugh soon erupted from his throat and had another smirk. “I don’t know, have you heard of White Eskimo?” His question was simple, though you still looked as confused as a kite flying in the air. You didn’t want to offend him, but you also knew you couldn’t lie to him. “No, I can’t say I have. It’s a band?”

“Not anymore, thank god. I am so embarrassed looking back on old videos, my voice was so small and my young, naive self had no clue what the world had in store for me. One Direction, have you heard of them?” Harry’s smirk was replaced by actual curiosity, the name sounded familiar but you’d never listened to any of their music. “You see, the look on your face says that you do. But that’s also not a band anymore, we all went solo. I wouldn’t know if you knew any of my music. And not to be cocky but I should throw it out there that I have appeared on the radio more times than I can count.”

The night was just getting weirder by the second, why was someone who has been on the radio talking to you? Out of all the girls in this room, he chose the one with a baby. You love Cadence more than you love yourself, you would take her over any other love for the rest of your life, it’s just weird when talking to people. “I’ve heard of the band, a few times I think. But I have never listened to your music.”

Harry lifted his hand to rest over his heart, “You’ve wounded me.” You didn’t know why, but you ended up letting out a laugh that was probably louder than it should have been. “Okay, so maybe you are a bit cocky. But that doesn’t explain how you and Daniel met on this show.”

“To be fair, Y/n, you never asked how we met, all you asked was who I was here for. But since you just have to know, his brother was on the show as well. It’s called The X-Factor, it’s a singing competition show. Anyways, his brother went before me and I guess he could sense my nerves because he came up to me and told me that I would do great. His brother didn’t end up making it, I actually think he still kind of resents me.”

His brother, Austin Green, wasn’t here tonight. His wife was in the hospital having their baby, you had only met him twice. And each time you had met him, he wasn’t the kindest person, especially since you had a baby so young and the father wasn’t around. “He resents me too, it’s not just you. Having a baby out of wedlock is not the ideal situation in his book. Hell, it’s not the ideal situation in anyone's book.”

A look of pity flashed across his face. You’ve gotten used to that look, it doesn’t get easier each time it gets given to you, and it’ll only weigh more and more on your daughter as she gets older. Oh look, Cadence’s mom is a whore who got pregnant after having sex with a douchebag, clearly they weren’t good enough for him since he had no will to stick around.

“Now that’s not true. It was not a look of pity, it was one of sorrow. The fact that someone would criticise you because you had a baby out of wedlock, but now I can see the story goes deeper than that. And I certainly don’t think you are a whore for having sex with some ‘douchebag’ whom you may have loved.” Harry stated, leaning his head downward a little do get a better look into your eyes. How in the hell did you just say all of that out loud? The look in his eyes did in fact show sorrow, but not for the reasons you had thought.

Maybe he’s just making all of this stuff up? He’s probably just saying all of this because he feels sorry for you, or maybe he wants something more with you. Something that doesn’t involve a baby, or clothes for that matter.

“I should go. I have to get my daughter home, she’s gonna wake up with cramps because of how her neck is laying. It was lovely to meet you Harry, really.” You stood up, grabbing the small backpack you had sitting on the back of the chair. It had a spare change of clothes for Cadence in case she had an accident, your phone and your wallet, and a few dolls for Cady to play with if she got bored.

“Wait, Y/n, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, opposite of that actually.” His hand grabbed the wrist that wasn’t holding Cadence up. His face was sincere, though it did not make things better. “Harry, it’s okay, you don’t have to pretend to want to get to know me. Guys like you never do, I don’t hold you against it.”

“Guys like me? Y/n, you can’t put words in my mouth like that. You don’t know me, and if you did, I’m sure you wouldn’t be saying that. I don’t care if you’re a single mum at a young age. I don’t care if you are barely surviving with bills piling up. I don’t care if your apartment is a mess because you have a child and it is hard to keep a clean platform. I don’t care, okay? I walked up to you because you were alone and I figured you would like the company.”

He interrupted you before you could properly finish, his words were barely registering and his hand was still clasped around your wrist. However, you pulled away and placed your arm under your daughter protectively, also to ease the slight pain of holding her in one arm. “So you admit it. You only talked to me because you felt bad for me. Look I’m not some lonely girl who needs saving, I have a child to think about and she will always come first.”

Maybe you were overreacting, he hadn’t even said anything about Cadence. “What? I did not come over to you because I felt bad. Why can’t you just believe me when I say that I genuinely wanted to talk to you.”

Harry was getting frustrated, it was pretty clear. His voice was raising the slightest bit, the rasp in his voice slowly disappearing. “Because guys don’t talk to me for no good reason. They always want something, so make this easier for both of us and spit it out already.”

By now, the bickering had caused Cady to stir in your arms. Your eyes still on Harry as you slowly started to lull her back to sleep, bouncing a little side to side. “I just wanted to get to know you better. Believe it or not, not all guys are looking for something.” And with that Harry turned around and walked away. Leaving you to sigh and make your way over to Zoey and Daniel to bid your goodbyes.

His words replaying in your head, Believe it or not, not all guys are looking for something. What did that even mean?

Part Two

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Hello everyone, welcome to my new mini series, My Girl, I have no clue how long it'll actually be but I have some ideas. I really hope you like it, if people are even reading this. If not lets pretend this never happened. I am still getting used to uploading on here so I am going to try and figure out how to make a masterlist to stay organised, and how to do requests for whenever you guys have ideas. I may not be the best writer out there, but it’s just a thing I enjoy doing. If you are here, thank you for reading and I hope you come back.