#could do a whole essay on finding your faith in other people

[maybebabyplease]

for the @wolfstarmicrofic prompt: 

faithless

He was on the floor again, a jutted up nail digging into his knee. Remus lay on the bed, fast asleep as Sirius’ wand knit together the skin on his stomach. Sirius cleaned the dried blood and placed a hand over the new scar, so like one of his own.

Faithless, his mother had snarled, backhanding him across the cheek. Faithless, his father had said, voice cold as he turned to walk away. Faithless, Regulus had breathed, clutching his left arm, sorrow in his eyes.

Sirius smiled. Well. If only they could see him now. Was this not faith?

[beloved-child-of-the-house]

i stand with you in the face of a defensive misunderstanding of what critique is.

i think understanding what a critique actually is is a skill that increasingly is not taught. i remember going through freshman art courses feeling the frustration that all negative, nasty, unhelpful, and missed-the-point-entirely feedback is so commonly conflated with critique, and then critique gets a bad name because everyone remembers the time someone said their painting looked like an asshole (true story, altho now i think i would take it as a compliment) instead of the time a teacher or friend or classmate helped them uncover a hurtful bias or think of new ways to explore the same idea or how to connect it to related ideas or how to look up and understand other people's ideas on the same topic.

anyway i think you're great.

ahhh you're so kind to me!! i appreciate your support, and i think you are great also.

i have experience with giving and receiving critique as a student myself, and i think it was the best part of my degree! i majored in creative writing in college, and critique was just a generally accepted part of learning to become a writer. i don't even remember people being especially worried about receiving critique on their work. we had guidance on what kind of feedback was useful, but we were still at liberty to give it as we saw fit as like messy 19 year olds. the standard was that we gave it both written on printed copies of the work AND aloud in front of the whole class, and the writer receiving it was not permitted to speak during the critique. understanding how people are perceiving your work is important!

i don't have any particularly negative recollections of the critique process, although once in a high school writing class, the boys in the class told me that my male characters touched each other too gently and real boys are more rough with each other. in particular, they took issue with me writing that one boy nudged another. nudging is too soft. nudging is for girls. that was more than 20 years ago, and i still think about it sometimes because it was such an interesting perspective! i did not take their advice, though.

i should dig up that piece and see if it reads queer in any other ways. i think that's what they were getting at. (actually i once had a non-fiction class tell me i was in love with my roommate after reading an essay i wrote about her)(i did not listen to that advice either, but having 12 acquaintances tell you that you're gay in 2006 before you realize it yourself is Truly Something!)

i think people have conflated criticism and critique and think that being more openly analytical is the same thing as being negative. but analysis is so fun to me! analysis is why i joined fandom in the first place, and it's why i write fic! can we trust each other to be respectful and to speak in good faith even when we're not singing each other's praises? for me fandom would be better if we could.

oh i also want to clarify that i don't think it's impossible to demonstrate that you've thought deeply about a piece of fanwork while remaining completely positive. people do it all the time and do it very well!

i know i sometimes have tunnel vision wrt my own perspective. in a lot of situations, i wish it were more acceptable to be more direct, and i know people sometimes find the way i express myself to be kind of shocking. i know a lot of people like to be spoken to more indirectly than comes natural to me, and i don't mean to imply that my perspective is the only correct one or that there's no good reason to err on the side of gentleness/politeness in our responses to amateur art and writing. i just think that at a certain level of circumspection, it feels like we're all holding each other at arm's length.

i think for people who can't bear to feel exposed, making and sharing art is always going to be painful and difficult, and maybe too painful and difficult to enjoy the process unless they're sure of a soft landing. but like. the rewards of being loved only come after the mortifying ordeal of being known, right?

[epickiya722]

I'm new to the JJK fandom, and after one month of interacting with the fandom, I noticed that many view Gojo as a womanizer. I believe it to be false.

Maybe it's because of that one time Gege commented that he doesn't see Gojo being faithful to a woman (that man looks like a twink, so I don't blame you, Akutami). Nonetheless, I do not believe it means that Gojo is a playboy/ fuckboy.Let me tell you: while Gojo got the looks, it does not change the fact that he got no hoes He's a hoe repellent no matter the gender.

He is that type of guy that is really handsome, but the moment he opens his mouth, your perception of him changes so much that you would find Deadpool's left ass cheek more attractive. Hell, even Toji's worm. My dude is annoying as hell. He is rude, tactless, and privileged. Add to that the fact that he might also have mommy and daddy issues  because I'm sure he was not treated like a normal kid (but that is another discussion for another time).

Gojo might also have a lot of trust issues combined to the fact that he tends to isolate himself by not letting himself get too close to others. Like this guy is the strongest sorcerer, and his birth caused a shift in the Jujutsu world. Since his birth, people have been trying to kill him. Even the higher up in Jujutsu, see him as a nuisance and are waiting for the opportunity to do him dirty and you to tell me that he doesn't have trust issues? He has infinity on all the time, to the point that he does that subconsciously, and you want to tell me that he's gonna drop that just to get laid? So that he can get  a cursed technique aimed right at his balls?

And even if he is a playboy in the sense that it's not sexual and it's just emotional cheating. The dude feels like no one can relate to him. No one understands what it's like to be at the top, to be the strongest. So what would be the point?

I like Gojo, but in real life, being in a relationship with this man means you'll probably be his therapist because I know this guy has a lot of issues. At least he got money, so you'll be compensated I guess?

I'm rambling a lot, and it's not structured, but I also do not want to write a whole essay in your ask box.

In conclusion: It must be the cash cause it ain't your personality or whatever Beyoncé said.

What do you think?

When I tell you that "womanizer Gojo" is one of the characterizations I hate that some of the fandom has given him I HATE IT.

This is why we take the time to reread something and better understand it because in what world does a womanizing Gojo fits? Especially, in canon when it would be hard to maintain a romantic relationship given the risks Jujutsu sorcerers take? And with the description you gave are other reasons why Gojo wouldn't have a significant other.

Let's be honest, if there was one person who could handle Gojo it was Geto. This isn't me saying this as a shipper, but just stating a fact.

Like, if he would have a romantic partner, it would have him. Shoko's their friend, yes. But that is the most that she sees herself as. Chapter 220, she states hell would freeze over before she falls for any of those two. She's aware of the flaws they both have, but that doesn't she didn't want to be there for them.

One thing I like about Gojo is that despite the reputation he has as a sorcerer, he got his flaws that make him human. Just me, but I don't see the point of adding more flaws to him if I like him already as he is. Like, come on. Just make an OC, at this point.

I know sometimes canon can suck, but fanon? Is worse sometimes.

It's like how some people will depict Yuji drinking and eating anything because "Oh, he's a total dumbass".

I hate that. Yes, Yuji states he's dumb, but he has displayed he does have intelligence and sometimes even he ain't with the bullshit with others. When he said he'll eat anything, it was more on the lines of "I'll eat a cursed object to save people" not "I'll drink gasoline because I was dared to".

Like, damn, he ain't that careless! He ain't that stupid! (Just giving him the Kaminari treatment, huh?)

Just... I wish more people actually stop and think about what they're reading instead of running with it and going with a depiction that others say is "canon" (it's not) or "better than canon". Especially, with a media that isn't from your native country.

[d34dlysinner]

Said iI'd make another, couldn't resist after listening to Amen. I need some Angstsy ahh shi to live, but with good ending lmao, kings + Lucifer, our lovely butcher devil, sitri, and Zagan. (and anyone else if you feel someone wld work for this lmao) With a mc who was highly religious and devoted to our lord and savior Jesus h Christ, stemming from past loss of a lover. Y'know how people sometimes after loss turn to religion to help get through it. idk brain not braining typing this whole typing am essay for my Paleobiology class lmao. And well, y'know when they meet the reality of heaven and hell it's like.

'Aw shi-' cue internal mental crisis as they find out their faith was a lie, God is dead. And angels want their soul but not for the good reason.

So it's like, the grief starts all over again n'they're just sitting in the corner vibrating ready to claw the next angel they see in 'WHERE TF IS [insert dead partner]' and probably tried to out of sheer gremlin energy. It's like, they're going through the emotions again n'feel like an idiot for believing such things. Y'know musing over the loss all over again, yadda yadda In the end they come to terms n'shi and move on for real for real.

Ik this is a lot but it's a thought I had how things would go on an mc who was really religious and experiences well, that the religion was a lie xD. Bonus Angst points if the religious belief started to help quell the person after a loved ones death. Lol

Ok enough rambling, I need to finish this essay before I get thrown out a window again.

(Hope I interpreted this well- thanks for the ask!! XD keep on brainrotting)

There you were shivering in the corner of a small room as your mind started to race. Pictures of angels and your dead lover flickering through your mind as you started to doubt what reality and truth was. Your eyes pricked as continuous tears poured out. You seemed too deep in your thoughts. Almost to the point where you cancelled everything and everyone around you.

Satan could feel your rage and happily fed of from it. But at the same time he felt useless as he saw how shattered you seemed from learning the truth.

"I know that humans learned from the angels lies, but I promise you some sense of relief during this battle when we cam finally put an end on them...", he said as he wasn't the best to console someone who was as broken as you were right now. He didn't understand how you felt tho.

Beelzebub understood your anger. He wouldn't show it himself, but he was angry too. Of course he wants peace and to relax. This can't happen when there are angels literally hunting him and other demons. He would sit with you and allow you to cry it out before trying to convince you to join him. He promises to aid you to fight the angels. Even when you can't see him.

Mammon stared down at your saddened frame as he stood in front of you in silence. He took some time before trying to speak to you. "If you're sad about them taking away what's yours. Then demand it back from them. Or make them pay.", was all he said. He wanted you to feel determined to take back what was yours. But he had to he honest that it saddened him to see you so greedy for a past lover and not him.

Leviathan looked down at your form. He didn't know why you cried. But he felt as of he should be jealous. Where you crying for another? Or was it for him? It didn't matter at that moment as he said: "I don't know why your crying. But let's stop using time on crying when you could possibly avenge what your crying for by fighting angels." He isn't the best at consoling others. He is someone who likes to do things efficiently.

Lucifer did enjoy the tears that streamed down your face. What he loved even more was knowing that these tears came to be because of the betrayal and anger you felt towards the angels. Yes, he was an ex angel, but he just as any other demon wants and needs to put an end to the torment that the angels put on the demons. "Join us and fight. It's better to seek for some sense of peace than to do nothing in a tiny room. You could help us and put a stop to those who lied.", he says as he referred to the angels.

Andrealphus could only smell revenge. He knew how you felt and tried to convince you to fight with him. He wishes for you to join and help and hoped that it would give you some sense of peace as you go against the thing that ruined your life even more.

Zagan wasn't a man of many words, but that didn't mean that he would wait out with you and listen to you vent. When you were done he would only nod, stand up and reach a hand out to you. "If you hate them so much... please fight against them with us. We're stronger with you at our side...", was all he said as he waited for you to accept his hand.

Sitri heard your sniffles over your heartbeat. It saddened him as he sat next to you and tried to embrace you. He waited it out and was set on protecting you while you vented incase anyone tried to hurt you during this time. Only when you were somewhat calmed down did he dare to speak. "Solomon...", he started referring to your ancestor again. It somewhat made you feel inferior, but for now it didn't matter as you understood that the demons like you also lost someone dear to them because of the angels.

"I hope you're willing to fight at our side. I understand that this might be a huge change for you since you like other humans were misled by the angels. Please, understand that we also need you.", he said as he stood back up, reaching down to you.

Whether they could console you or not. You appreciated that they tried as you yet again see how wrong those lies of the angels were. You understood that like you, those demons also lost things they thought were precious. You accepted their request as you want to atleast have answers and see if you can atleast find some peace with your lost.

[go-scottishgal14]

Great essay in The Telegraph, 7/28/2024, hits nail on head imho....

Not even France can escape the West’s cultural decay

Our civilisation is surely doomed when the best Paris can offer is a drag queen parody of the Last Supper

TIM STANLEY -- 28 July 2024 at 7:30 pm

At the Olympics they often sing Imagine, containing the line, “Imagine there’s no countries …” Well, if there were no countries, there’d be no Olympics, which would be marvellous. Who wants to watch two weeks of muscular women throwing sticks and balls at each other? The only entertaining bit is the opening ceremony. Britain did a good ’un back in 2012; so good that it entered folklore, along with the 1966 World Cup and Dunkirk. When our grandkids ask, “What did you do in the clash of civilisations?” we shall reply: “We pushed Elizabeth II out of a helicopter.”

Paris, by contrast, offered us drag queens doing a parody of the Last Supper – insulting Christians, mocking God. When I described the scene to a priest, he replied: “That explains the torrential rain, then.”

It was blasphemous, sure, but it was also tacky; the crime aesthetic as well as religious. You have a once-in-a-lifetime chance to sell your country to tourists, and what did France go with? A dozen men – one with a beard – twerking to Freed from Desire. Actual culture necessitates discipline and taste. In the 21st century, people just “party”, cos it requires zero effort and any idiot can do it.

Kicking Christians is very easy because we have no power and, when we’re angry, we don’t fly planes into things. And yet some people cannot leave us alone. They feel a need to ridicule our beliefs and subvert our images, to drag Christ down to the gutter – as if crucifying him once wasn’t enough.

It’s probably because faith is beautiful. People don’t know how to react to it. When you’ve been raised in ugliness, to be confronted with the profound, transcendent beauty of the Last Supper can inspire awe, yes, but also fear. Think of those apes going bananas at the mysterious monolith in 2001: A Space Odyssey. Beauty pierces the illusion of a comfortably banal existence.

Imagine if instead of the drag queen parody, the ceremony had paused to display the real painting by Leonardo da Vinci. No music. No fireworks. Just Jesus&Co. Millions would’ve switched off the telly – because they’d find it boring, no doubt, but also strange, unnerving, possibly offensive. There would’ve been thousands of complaints. We have engineered an entire existence around pleasure and distraction. Stop the disco for one minute and people might fill the silence with thought, even prayer … or they might riot.

Either way, you’ve got a revolution on your hands, and the powers that be can’t have that.

L’Hexagone faces a fate worse than death: becoming Great Britain

Organisers have apologised for any offence caused, but wise-guys insist the whole thing was a very French joke the world didn’t get. But how French was the ceremony in total?

Celine Dion is Canadian. Lady Gaga is from the United States. “This is France!” tweeted Emmanuel Macron – in English, something one could never imagine De Gaulle or Mitterrand doing. In fact this version of France looks suspiciously American, and drag is another import.

Men have been dressing up as women for a laugh for centuries, and long may it continue. But the art form’s current vibe was promoted by Ru Paul – obviously influenced by Voguing – and the notion that drag queens are apostles for progress is 100 per cent “made in the USA”.

I’m old enough to remember when a drag act meant a bloke, often married, dressed as Barbara Cartland telling filthy jokes about foreigners in the Dog and Duck. The Yanks have mainstreamed this subculture, transforming it into a mass consumer product, which was another reason to yawn rather than boo at the drag disciples. This stuff ceased being brave or transgressive 20 years ago. Like the rainbow flag (designed by an American) or Pride (begun in America), it is banal because it is ubiquitous.

So, Brits shouldn’t gloat over the tawdry French games. If we held them today, we’d make identical mistakes. Our ceremony would also be a celebration of diversity – every Western nation has become diverse to the point of looking exactly the same – for diversity is something one promotes when you’ve lost confidence in your historical identity. When you’ve decided everything you did pre-1960 was racist, and you’ve stopped writing great novels, composing symphonies or painting beyond primary school standard.

The West is culturally dying. It only looks alive because we’re dancing among the relics of what we used to do well – and are so embarrassed by these past accomplishments that we feel moved to ridicule their ideals.

The Paris ceremony, of course, featured a headless Marie Antoinette. Let’s laugh at a victim of an earlier experiment in egalitarianism. It’s interesting how gender always haunts debates about civilisation. In 1790, Edmund Burke – a philosopher writing before Marie’s execution – predicted that the lack of chivalry shown towards the queen would eventually spell disaster for all women and all France. In a world without etiquette or distinction, he said, “a queen is but a woman; a woman is but an animal, and an animal not of the highest order”. Abusing monarchs, like burning books, erodes dignity and encourages murder.

France’s decline is nothing special. In some regards it is ahead of us; in others, behind. The depressing point is that it is familiar. These Olympics have been marred by racial tension, incompetence, poor taste, unreliable railways, filthy river water and terrible weather. France’s fate is worse than death: she has become Great Britain.

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Saw you were going through Tillie Walden books in preparation for Book Three, got to commend you for putting in more legwork than most fans. Your review of Book One was actually what got me into reading her stuff and opening my perspective!

Idk if you've read Spinning yet so I don't want to spoil it, but there's a experience Tillie recounts from her life in it that really makes all of the accusations of Tillie being a groomer more disgusting. I'm not looking forward to fan discussion when Book Three starts to get marketed and releases, but I'm looking forward to whatever you'll have to say on it ^^

I've read Spinning and I think I know what part you're talking about. There are a handful of moments in Spinning that made me raise my brows and go, "....Oh. Oh no." And yeah, that scene is one I'm going to talk about a lot in my analysis.

Like... without giving too much away, my thought process in this is I believe that when a creator creates, whatever the medium, a piece of their soul is weaved in. Think about every artist you follow, writers and authors you read, video essayists you watch, etc. and you'll find connections and themes throughout their work that helps you piece together a small part of who they are, what they're passionate about, what bothers them, the pains they've suffered, etc. Sure, you'll never know the whole person, but you'll learn a little.

When I look at the Clementine comics, I always ask, "Why are you like this? Why are you the way that you are?? Why did Tillie write it like this??" and I believe a lot of questions are answered when looking at her previous works.

For example, everyone gets pissy about the reasons why Clementine left Ericson, and for good reason. But when you read more of Tillie's work, "I'm not happy"/"They thought I was a liability but I think the real issue was that I couldn't talk to any of them about it" actually starts to make some sense. It's still not good, but I can see why specifically Tillie Walden took that road... this isn't the first time she's written something like this.

The thing about Spinning is it's autobiographical, so we get to actually know a lot more about Tillie and her time as a competitive figure skater... because did y'all know that? She was a competitive figure and synchronized skater for twelve years, and she hated it. She dealt with bullying and all the pressures that come with being a skater. She was scared of being gay and living in Texas. One scene that I still think about [aside from that scene] is when she came out to her brother and his response was, "Oh. I mean, it's just sorta... wrong, I think."

I've read Spinning, On a Sunbeam, and a few stories from the Alone in Space collection, and I still have more to get to... though to be real honest, I'm totally procrastinating Are You Listening? because @pi-creates has read that one, so we've talked about it and I know the trigger warnings behind it and I'm just... I need to be in the right headspace, I'll get to it eventually.

But y'know what really sucks? I honestly believe that a lot of people in the twdg fandom would love Tillie's other works. Y'all are always going off about wanting more female characters who are complex, interesting, flawed and gay and like.... Tillie Walden! That's Tillie Walden's works! But opinions of her are soured by the Clementine comics! So they're not going to give her another chance! And that sucks!

Ugh, anyway... I guess you could say that my motivations behind this are my own frustrations with the fandom being so shitty with their bad faith takes, like listen.... I've discovered that bad faith takes really get under my skin- reddit makes me want to walk into the ocean.

I know that my one essay isn't going to change anything, and I'm not going to post it on reddit, but I'm doing it anyway in hopes that some people will read it and develop a more nuanced opinion of all this. Or give Tillie's other works a chance. But mostly, this is for me and if other people get something out of it, then even better.

Boat God help us all when Book Three drops, though... people were fucking shitty about Book Two, like people went out of their way to be intentionally deceptive with lying about what happens, blowing things out of proportion, and making fake wiki screenshots and shit. DomTheBomb's review on youtube was half-assed, furthered the harmful self-insert narrative, AND got basic facts about the story wrong. People attacked Tillie's insta with grooming accusations, and there were people telling her they hoped her newborn baby was taken away from her.

When I say I've never been more disappointed in this fandom, I fucking mean it. My only hope is that people won't be as pissy since it's the final book in the trilogy but y'know.

I don't know when my post on it will be out, but I'm shooting for before Book Three releases. I'm mostly working on my clouis and violentine essay while I read through Tillie's books. Thanks for the message💚

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

As you may have noticed, I'm big on the benefit of the doubt, aka there's more truth and knowledge in knowing you don't know than pretending you do. The pundits pretending to be neurologists with a specialty in gerontology that qualifies them to condemn Biden's brain don't actually have either the expertise or the evidence to reach the conclusions they are airing. They're in a sort of mass-hysteria bandwagon to sabotage the current alternative to Trump, which is as dangerous as it is familiar from the 2016 election.

Meanwhile fascism is staring us in the face (in the person of a man so dim he keeps boasting he did well on the kind of cognitive test given when they're actually worried about your brain: in 2020 "President Trump again sought to showcase his mental fitness on television by reciting, over and over again in an interview broadcast on Wednesday evening, what he said was a sample cognitive testing sequence." That was the “Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV" business).

The New York Times, which has been running a concerted campaign in both news and opinion sections since at least February to convince the public that Biden is incompetent, has led the way. This is not my argument that Biden is the best candidate though he's certainly the best-placed candidate in that it's not so easy to get a new one up and running at this stage.

It's my argument that a whole lot of high-profile (mostly) men are suffering from too much faith in their own belief in their superior objectivity and cool rationality. Which is is too often why they're exceptionally unaware of the feelings/motives driving them and why they're jumping on the bandwagon. They seem to suffer from a particular kind of memory impairment: how with the same strategies, they (and, yeah, it's some of the same pundits) helped undermine the candidate running against the fascist eight years ago, led by the same newspaper.

I have come across several people who are in fact qualified in the relevant areas, and their opinions and some of the criteria for those opinions follow. A number of actual experts piped up to say that Biden's lifelong stuttering disability often has a little-known related symptom called cluttering, which I hadn't heard of. They thought it could explain some of his debate performance: "Cluttering is a speech disorder characterized by rapid or irregular speaking consisting of atypical pauses, repetitions, and disfluencies resulting in a breakdown in speech clarity and organization. In contrast, stuttering is a speech disorder characterized by the repetition of sounds or words and disruptions in the flow of speech." Some of the speech experts note that in such a situation, trying to manage a speech impediment consumes some of the mental energy that would otherwise be focused on formulating thoughts.

Meanwhile, there was an essay this spring by an actual gerontologist in the L.A. Times who says that Biden shows normal signs of aging. Dr. Stone writes: "First, memory. I explain to patients that there are three components to consider. One is formation. Then storage. And, finally, recall. The most common issue among seniors is slow recall. This is the familiar “tip of the tongue” phenomenon, when a word seems to hide or a name won’t come to mind. You know the name, it’s in your bank of memories, it just can’t be accessed quickly. Given time, it usually arrives. This problem, called age-associated memory impairment, often starts for people in their 30s and gradually progresses. It’s a nuisance but not disabling. If, like me, you find yourself using the term “whatchamacallit,” you probably have it. Don’t worry, you’ll be fine." https://www.latimes.com/opinion/story/2024-03-07/joe-biden-age-memory-alzheimers-cognition

Two other medical experts on aging (bios below) wrote this piece:

There is no clinical evidence for cognitive decline in President Biden — despite armchair gerontologists declaring otherwise. It may be tempting to conclude that such evidence does not exist because an extensive battery of diagnostic assessments of cognitive functioning has not been ordered (to our knowledge) by his personal physician, and if done, something significant might be revealed. But presidents are evaluated by their physicians just like everyone else — cognitive functioning tests are not done unless the physician suspects a problem or if requested by the patient. Even then, a screening test of cognitive function is done first, followed by other more in-depth diagnostic assessments if the screen shows a worrisome score. Since Biden’s personal physician seems not to have felt cognitive screening testing was medically indicated, this represents evidence that such issues are unlikely to be present consistent with his family history of dementia-free longevity. It is also common to mistake Biden’s lifelong speech impediment for cognitive decline, his cough for an inability to speak clearly, his changed gait for a man in significant decline, an occasional misstatement as a sign of mental decay, etc. Each of us bears our own challenges with age — this is not a reason to dismiss and discard. It’s a recognition that along with the privilege of long life, come changes that require adaptation. We see them in Biden because he’s under a 24/7 spotlight. Place the same bright light of the media on any of the rest of us — at any age — and few would survive the scrutiny without a similar negative profile.

Dr. Bradley Willcox, M.D., MSc, FGSA, is a professor and director of research at the Department of Geriatric Medicine, John A. Burns School of Medicine, University of Hawai‘i Mānoa.

S. Jay Olshansky, Ph.D., is a professor in the School of Public Health at the University of Illinois at Chicago, [and] a research associate at the Center on Aging at the University of Chicago.

https://thehill.com/opinion/white-house/4391046-is-joe-biden-a-superager-were-asking-all-the-wrong-questions/

(Rebecca Solnit)

[reilora-borealis]

.... and you're NOT gonna tell us about the Shadowgast Playlist? Please 🫴, hand it over.

I said in my original post this was my toxic trait... nonetheless I am SO glad someone took the bait 😈

I'm not going to post the link because I value my spotify privacy and also I have an embarrassing username that no one needs to know about. However, since you asked nicely (and let's be honest, I wasn't expecting anyone to care! so thank you!), I will share ✨ my personal top 5 shadowgast songs ✨ with a bit of context for each.

If you're just here to roast my music taste, bear in mind... I said toxic trait. Proceed at your own risk.

1. Time in a Bottle by Jim Croce

"If I could make days last forever / If words could make wishes come true / I'd save every day like a treasure and then / Again, I would spend them with you..."

This one has two meaning imo: first, early-campaign Caleb wishing he could change the past to save his parents' lives; later, Essek wishing he had more time to spend with Caleb. The original version is beautiful, but there is also a cover by Yungblud (yes, it's on the Hobbs & Shaw soundtrack) that's badass but a very different vibe.

2. Lilith by Halsey

"I'm perfection when it comes to first impressions / I romanticize and then I get to stressing / Big brain like I'm teaching at a lesson / Baby, it's a blessing..."

Every time this song comes on I legit yell ESSEK ANTHEM! because it is. This is the Hot Villain theme song. The beat is so sexy. The lyrics are on point ("I am disgusting / I've been corrupted / And by now I don't need not help to be destructive"). The vibes are just immaculate.

3. No Halo by Brockhampton

"Went to church for the hell of it, stumbled in drunk as shit / Been going through it again / Been talking to myself, wondering who I am / Been thinking I am better than Him..."

Look. I could write an entire essay about this one song. Wizard hubris, depression, and the crisis of faith Essek goes through when the Nein find out about his betrayal. Also, for those who theorize Essek is the unwilling chosen of the Luxon - he could, in fact, be "God's special mess".

4. X&Y by Coldplay

"I dive in at the deep end / You become my best friend / I want to love you but I don't know if I can / I know something is broken / And I'm trying to fix it / Trying to repair it / Any way I can..."

Two characters who both think they are terrible people that don't deserve love, trying to be better and trying to better each other? And they fall in love? And they're narrative foils? No one is doing it like them! (Plus the chorus "You and me are drifting into outer space" just screams ~wizards in the star room~.)

5. All The Stars by Kendrick Lamar feat. SZA (album version)

"Tell me what you gon' do to me / Confrontation ain't nothing new to me / You can bring a bullet, bring a sword, bring a morgue / But you can't bring the truth to me..."

I don't know how this song manages to be both broody and uplifting at the same time, but it is and it's perfection. It's the grimness of reality and the hope for the future, the refrain of "All the stars are closer" symbolizing all the possibilities that are now within reach.

And oh boy, I don't have time to write about the whole playlist but if you've made it this far, here are some bonus mini listicles because this is my Roman Empire 😌

Entire playlist of just shadowgast-coded Hozier songs:

Arsonist's Lullabye

In The Woods Somewhere

De Selby (pt. 2)

Someone New

Like Real People Do

Moment's Silence

From Eden

All My Homies Hate Trent Ikithon songs:

Heathens by Twenty One Pilots

Eat Your Young by Hozier

Buzzkill by Mothica

Another Brick In The Wall, pt. II by Pink Floyd

My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark by Fall Out Boy

Other ships? In my shadowgast playlist? It's more likely than you think:

The Cave by Mumford & Sons (widobrave)

Cringe by Matt Maeson (widojest)

Tessellate by alt-J (blumendrei)

EDM wizard songs if you're into that sort of thing (I am):

Time Stops by Virtual Riot

I'd Love To Change The World (Matstubs Remix) by Jetta

I Could Be Anything by the Glitch Mob feat. Elohim

New Eyes by Echos

Keep in mind this is just a handful of songs out of like a hundred, so I welcome you to give me the benefit of the doubt and fill in the rest of the playlist in your mind with whatever makes me seem cool to you.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk, I am sorry it took me four days to write this... 😅

[chatonarya]

Lyric Breakdown of "Heal The World" (part 1)

Original post on reddit.

Warning: extremely long text, excessive detail and citations, and some shippiness. Please take with a heaping spoon of salt, this is personal interpretation to the max and not gospel.

Previous essay on Gnosis’s character with some baseline assumptions and interpretations I am making.

I told myself I wasn't going to do this but here we are. On the other hand, though, I deserve it for sleeping on this song for nearly a year after its release. Let's dive in, shall we? Why does Gnosis have such a sappy and emotional image song, and what does it mean?

It's just a tear that saves me from the darkness.

Such a powerful opening line. What does the tear symbolize, what is the emotion behind it? Sorrow, grief, and pain—but pain most of all, as pain is echoed and emphasized throughout the whole song.

Witnessed through a mirror, pain is truth,

Pain and truth go hand in hand, which is a theme which is echoed throughout. It's the pain itself that keeps everything real—the pain (the tear) which saves him from total destruction; the personal anguish which experience keeps him from going off into the deep end.

Now “witnessed through a mirror”: the pain is detached and not a part of him, reflected back at him by something or someone else, and only like that does he see it. Or even, it’s the reflection that confirms it exists at all. Who is the person who is Gnosis’ mirror?

I’ll make no bones about it: the person Gnosis is addressing throughout the song is Enciodes. There’s literally, as I will demonstrate, nobody else he could be speaking to and speaking of.

So: it’s a bit of a stretch, but this could possibly be a veiled reference to their conversation as children where Enciodes says that he doesn’t believe Gnosis is at fault for the accident, but Gnosis does. This little bit of unshakable faith is one of the reasons Gnosis is so loyal to Enciodes, and during that flashback, Enciodes says, “It definitely has nothing to do with you. Nobody looks up to my father as much as you do,” almost as though he’s reflecting Gnosis’ true self back at him, showing him the reality and the truth that he committed no crime.

This is the painful truth that keeps everything real; that Gnosis carries inside of him, that saves him from the darkness: his innocence.

And through your eyes we’ll find an endless future,

During BI-3, Gnosis says to Ratatos: “[Enciodes] promised me a future.” This line is a clear reference to that. Through Enciodes’ eyes and his vision for Kjerag, an endless future, bright and dazzling, awaits.

I'll continue forward, calling to you.

This line also refers to Enciodes.

In fact, it wouldn’t be much of a stretch to argue that this entire verse refers not merely to the present moment, that is, Gnosis’s present position, but also, to the moment of his departure from Kjerag. When they parted ways, Gnosis said he would study and learn what he could to return and help Enciodes achieve their dream. In his operator file, Gnosis also comments about making “an appointment” to see Enciodes again, and returning Kjerag even if he did not appear. Though their paths are separate, they share the same goal, reflected in Gnosis’s second talent, “Two Paths, One Goal.” He continues working for the sake of their dream, while still connected to Enciodes.

This is the edge, but I continue flying.

As Gnosis goes forward, he reaches the edge. It’s a figurative cliff, with nowhere to go and only death at the bottom, but he willingly flies past this precipice on his own wings.

Leaving life around me, break away the pain.

“Leaving life” refers to Gnosis’ decision to cut himself off from the trappings of ordinary life and keep other people at arm’s length. “I am not interested in deeper emotional exchanges.” He was already ostracized before, and he embraces it, regardless of the fact that he's reached the edge—perhaps the limits of endurance or rationality or sense. He also "left life" in a more literal sense when the Edelweisses left everything they knew in Kjerag.

Then we come to the second part. “Break away.” There are three definitions of this phrase:

To separate or detach oneself, as from a group.

To move rapidly away from or ahead of a group.

To discontinue customary practice.

In my opinion, pretty much all three of these definitions apply.

To quote from Gnosis’ op file: “This isn't to say he's the kind who doesn't understand others' feelings. Precisely the opposite; he’s exceptionally clear-headed on what he wants to do, and as such he can detach himself from any other concerns. Researchers often [...] have sufficient mental energy to treat scientific principles objectively, but not necessarily enough leftover to deal with personal emotions. Thus, a good few choose to cut themselves off as thoroughly as possible. Gnosis is clearly one of these types.”

Gnosis chooses to cut off his personal emotions as much as he can in order to focus on what needs to be done. In a more literal sense, he is detached from the rest of the group. He works alone. Even his RIIC base skills reflect his solitary nature: “Precise Calculations” and “Hidden Mastermind”. Gnosis pulls the strings behind the scenes, and does things in an unconventional way.

But it’s not merely “break away” but break away the pain. This implies that his detachment and isolation is not without consequence for him. He does feel some pain doing it, but again he chooses to set it aside. It is a necessary price.

Next, this is the second time “pain” appears. The first time, it’s stated that “pain is truth”, and now the pain is broken away as if detached and set aside, perhaps concealed. The pain is what saves him from the darkness, but he hides it inside as he continues on.

I want to feel my divisions crumble down.

What’s interesting is that this line about divisions comes immediately after a line about divisions and separation. It’s almost as though, while he’s taking up this burden willingly, he’s also anticipating the day that it is no longer necessary. “Divisions” could also refer to the invisible walls which keep Gnosis ostracized and permanently branded (divided) in his homeland: that is, the false assumptions of being responsible for the deaths of Olafur and Elizabeth Silverash.

Look into my eyes and heal the world of darkness.

This line to me feels like it’s implying a silent request for reassurance. Thus far, the lyrics have been almost a series of promises, and they culminate in something that’s almost a question, asking for confirmation that they’ve been heard, especially against the backdrop of “divisions.”

The voices grow, the silence fills with screams,

Whose voices are these, and who is screaming? The people of Kjerag. This is a two-fold line: as it leads into the next line, it’s clear that it’s referring to the present day, and the impending suffering which approaches Kjerag if they continue on their current path. Other countries crushing Kjerag underfoot; the spread of oripathy; the "avalanche set to bury all of Kjerag."

But it could also refer to the events of the past. We know via the flashback and Gnosis' file that he was ostracized after the accident. Although it's never stated nor implied what his family went through before they left beyond "There's no place for us in Kjerag", it's possible that these "voices" are those of the people who shunned him. We know that people openly badmouth Gnosis and he mentions having rocks thrown at his windows. It's possible—likely, even, as I postulated before—that the Edelweisses were bullied and treated cruelly before they were forced to leave. The "voices" are the cruel words, and the "screams" are their own silent and helpless laments.

I see the twilight set on the world.

"Twilight" refers to the same vision that Enciodes and Gnosis have of the impending disaster approaching Kjerag. “They can’t see what you and I can see,” Gnosis comments during BI-6.

In addition, however, I think it could be a veiled reference to Ragnarok, that is, the "Twilight of the Gods." I say this because of the context of Ragnarok and the events which surround it. Ragnarok is the apocalypse of Norse mythology, where the Aesir (gods) have their final battle and Midgard (the earth) is destroyed. An army of the dead sails from the underworld (Helheim), led by Hela and her father Loki, finally free of his chains beneath the earth, and her brothers Fenrir and Jormungandr (the World’s Serpent) will break free of their fetters and rise from the sea respectively, and Surtr, the ruler of Muspellheim, will break the rainbow bridge Bifrost which leads to Asgard, the peaceful realm of the Aesir high above Midgard, and set fire to the world.

For millennia, the Aesir enjoy their isolated quietude and peace in Asgard, with most of their disruptions coming from their opposing force the Jotnar, symbolizing the eternal conflict of culture vs nature. But among the Aesir, their leader, part Jotunn himself, Odin, through his many sacrifices to obtain knowledge (giving up his eye for a drink of Mimir’s well of wisdom; hanging upside for nine nights on Yggdrasil, the World Tree, to gain knowledge of the runes), had the gift of clairvoyance. He looked into the future and saw Ragnarok, and decided to take action, breaking up the family of Loki and treating his monstrous children abominably in attempts to prevent it. He cast Jormungandr into the ocean, tied up Fenrir when he grew too big, and banished half-dead Hela to the edges of Niflheim to rule over the dead. In the end, none of his efforts could keep Ragnarok from happening, as the gods’ fate could not be changed.

It was not uncommon for the Aesir to walk the earth for their amusement, but Odin in particular was known for wandering incognito, listening and observing. In doing so, he obtained a perspective that the others could not. In addition, when he was young, Odin met and befriended the Jotunn Loki, whom he liked so much that they became sworn blood brothers, not genetically related but vowing to treat each other as such. Despite this, Loki was always a contentious figure in Asgard, both on account of his mischievous nature and his race. Throughout various myths, he would sometimes help (often he was the figure the Aesir would turn to whenever they had some kind of unsolvable problem) and sometimes hinder (he’d create those problems himself). By and large, though, he wasn’t considered “evil” until Christianity came to the isles (a topic not for this essay), and not until the impending catastrophe of Ragnarok drew near with the death of Baldr, Lokasenna happened, and he was imprisoned until the final battle.

Now, I’m not saying that Enciodes is meant to hearken to Odin the All-father, not exactly, nor am I saying that Gnosis is meant to parallel Loki. After all, as I said, “twilight” is a pretty broad and simple word in this context that should probably simply be taken at face value. But… I can’t help but feel there are a few similarities to Norse myth as well, despite Kjerag taking inspiration from Switzerland and Tibet, and what with Ratatos’ name being a clear reference to Ratatoskr.

Cold by nature; an isolated yet peaceful realm above everything; very few people departing its embrace yet always returning changed; children separated on false and ultimately futile premises and families broken; someone mostly helpful yet always regarded as a traitor and outsider being the catalyst for change, who was always at the right-hand of the most powerful and important figure of the nation, sworn to them in some way, and said figure being preoccupied with averting a distant disaster.

It’s also worth noting the title of the stage TC-1 (from the To Be Continued vignette), which uses the Kjerag map/enemies: “Fimbulvinteren.” This is merely a different spelling of what in English is “Fimbulwinter,” that is, the event that precedes Ragnarok, the three-year winter. As of this writing, I don’t know if it’s just flavor text or meant to foreshadow something, but if it’s been chosen as a subtle foreshadowing, it does imply more turmoil in the future for Kjerag.

I’ve been on this tangent long enough, moving on now.

It’s starting to burn…

“Starting to burn” means the first flames of total destruction have already begun; it’s getting closer. Fire, also, is the direct counter to the ice and snow which defines Kjerag geographically.

Save me... Oh, save me...!

It’s this final line that makes me feel the verse as a whole refers also to Gnosis’ past.

If it was only about Kjerag, he ought to say "save us" or "save them," but he says "save me". He wants to be saved from his own twilight. What saves him is “a tear:” someone believing in him. As the situation grows more dire, this is more important than ever.

This is the edge, we keep on falling further.

Gnosis and Enciodes' ventures keep sending them deeper and deeper into the abyss, further from light and safety and into danger, accumulating sins and doing dark deeds…

Fate intwined between us, break away the truth.

…Yet no matter how far they fall, they're in this venture together, because it's their shared dream. Their fates are linked, no success or failure without the other.

As for the second half of the line, this is the second time “break away” appears, but this time rather than cutting the pain away, Gnosis is taking the truth with him—what is this truth that is intwined between himself and Enciodes? The same thing: the truth that Gnosis is not a traitor at all, the truth that he works for good. It’s a truth that, for most of BI, only they know.

I want to see the system falling down.

The "system" being that of Kjerag, the system which keeps the country stagnant: the Tri-clan Council and the Court of Elders, and the things which keep Kjerag shackled in the past (corruption, greed, closemindedness, ignorance) and possibly even lead to situations like Gnosis' own, where his family was framed and subsequently ostracized and exiled without any concrete evidence.

Look into my eyes and heal the world of darkness.

This line is a plea against the backdrop of the previous line. “Help me make things better.” “Look into my eyes” in this line can mean anything from “make me a promise” or “give me hope” or “join forces with me”, given that the previous lines refer to falling together and fate intwined—so I feel the strongest sentiment here is “hope/promise”.

This is the fear, it brings us to the end.

This is the first instance of “the end” that appears, and with the “us” in that line, I think it’s another reference to Gnosis’ line of “They can’t see what you and I see.” The vision that they have, and the fear that they have of the impending twilight is bringing them to the brink; that is, the accelerated plans of Karlan Trade to speed up modernization.

Breaking all around you, / Feel the lies surround the broken world

Their plans—and their coup, by extension—have created a delicate web of lies and deception. Enciodes is at the center of this web, much as in BI, and because he’s the focus, the lies “break” around him. Alternatively, one can say the world breaks around him, as he’s the one instigating the change in Kjerag, breaking the status quo. Through Enciodes’s attempts to reform the world, he also opens a path for Gnosis.

that I'll continue forward.

Despite being surrounded by lies (perhaps even lies of his own making), frightened, and with the approaching end, he stays the path and keeps going. But also, this is as far as I understand (despite the slightly awkward grammar), one sentence. So it’s actually “the lies that I’ll continue forward.” Again, what is Gnosis’ big lie (of his own making)? That he’s not a traitor, he’s actually working for good. As the world around him crumbles, the lies spread that Gnosis is a traitor and now works (continues forward) to destroy Karlan Trade in revenge, when he really doesn’t.

I’ll fight for the future. Heal the world of darkness.

Self-explanatory. Gnosis works with Enciodes to achieve a better future for Kjerag and keep the twilight from burning it to ashes. He also fights to heal the darkness—that is, the "system" referred to previously. But against the last line, it adds an extra dimension to “the lies”: nobody believes Gnosis actually works for the greater good, though is partly his own fault, too: “Because he only saw the ends, means be damned, the people who worked under him, while acknowledging his talents, had many complaints. [...] Even after coming to Rhodes Island, his personality is still disliked by many operators. [...] He's also rather apathetic regarding life and morality.”

And here I am, just standing on the edge / waiting for the final days

“Final days” serves to reinforce the idea that the “twilight” mentioned above isn’t just hard times, but complete destruction. Gnosis is waiting on the edge for the end, surrounded by lies—he’s watching it coming; expectant; ready; prepared.

Ooh, can you please save me from the end? The end, the end's calling fire raging deep within

“The end” (second time) in this case has a dual meaning. The fire in this context means either conviction or anger. As the end draws near (the “twilight”), his determination to avert it grows stronger.

It's a reference to Gnosis' impatience throughout BI and how he takes matters into his own hands. I've mentioned this before, but much of the "farce" conducted during the middle of BI (when Arctoscz and Ratatos are framed) was actually a form of expertly crafted revenge: from Enciodes saying Ratatos and Arctoscz would be given a fair trial (referencing how the Edelweisses were not), to Gnosis saying to Ratatos, “Do you see how the people are looking at you?”, referencing how he and his family were treated by the public. On a certain level, the whole thing was really quite personal (which is why as I said before, Degenbrecher comments she’s never seen Gnosis so emotional).

the reason I fall

"Falling" meant in a symbolic sense, as in falling from grace and becoming sullied; an angel falling, losing its wings, and becoming a devil; in a literal sense, Gnosis is a Liberi (bird), so flying and falling metaphors come naturally. And he can safely plummet from a cliff and recover—provided his wings aren’t broken.

Notice the shift from the beginning—initially, he says he “continues flying”, but now he falls instead. He falls from grace for the sake of their dream, to prevent the approaching final days. He’s been ready to do this all along (“Let me be a traitor again.”) as “[Kjerag] didn’t accept Gnosis” and they never did, as “in an isolated environment like Kjerag, one tiny mistake can be engraved in the collective memory for generations.” He’s always been ready to fall—or perhaps he’s always been falling all along.

Take my heart and save me from the end…!

This line is two-fold. First: Gnosis may fall, but his fall—his betrayal—is false. His heart is still pure, his motives clean. Only by someone acknowledging this fact, by taking and holding onto his noble heart, is he saved from being completely condemned and consigned to doom—the second meaning of “the end” from which he desires to be saved. Willingly taking the fall; and yet still, reaching out a desperate hand at the bottom before hitting the ground.

Second, more straightforward, "Take and accept all of my feelings and save me from my fate of destruction." Again I feel this is directed towards Enciodes. Who alone has the power to do this, to decide if Gnosis lives or dies? If his fall ends in darkness or if he'll be caught at the bottom? Enciodes.

Gnosis is aware of this: “Or would you like to finish me, the traitor, and make this farce real?” At any moment, Enciodes can end him. Without Enciodes behind him, and even then, Gnosis’ position and very presence in Kjerag is shaky. If Enciodes turns his back on Gnosis, it’s all over for him. Inasmuch as Enciodes emphasizes that Gnosis will not betray him, that trust goes two ways. Gnosis is also trusting that Enciodes will not betray him, either, much as Enciodes stood by him after the accident.

Because when we fall through dreams, I'll feel the ocean

Why ocean? What does ice turn to when it melts? Water. All the stagnant ice of Kjerag melting and turning into water when their dreams are achieved. What’s more, the ice turning into water extinguishes the approaching flames of destruction. Through their dreams, the impending disaster is averted.

When the waves rise up, we’ll move beyond together.

This is, again, a reference to Gnosis and Enciodes ushering Kjerag into a new future, and through that, moving through the fire and the darkness into a new world. The waves rising up to cleanse away the stagnation and to catch them as they fall and buoy them through the turmoil of change. They fell together, and they'll rise together.

It's just a tear, that saves me from the darkness. Witnessed through a mirror, feel the pain.

This time, the pain from the tear is palpable and tangible. It cannot be suppressed.

Once again assuming that Enciodes is the "mirror" and that he is reflecting the truth back at Gnosis, this time it’s more than an acknowledgement that the “pain is truth.” This time, it’s an acceptance of that truth, painful though it is; an acceptance to feel it, rather than break it away.

And through your cries we find an endless darkness.

"Endless darkness" is the flipside of the "endless future" and combination of that line with the "darkness" from which Gnosis is saved. But contrasting sharply with “through your eyes we’ll find an endless future,” this is “through your cries we find an endless darkness.” “Your cries”: once again, Enciodes.

One of my favorite lines from BI is this one from Enciodes at the end of what we later learn is his speech to Gnosis when they met again: "I have to make a difference. Everything I've seen has to have meaning."

Aside from the fact that I empathize heartily with the sentiment of trying to turn the chaos of the world and the things one sees into sense, this line to me is so heartfelt and reveals some of what we later learn is Enciodes’ own desperation and his feeling that he has no choice as time is running short. But how many people know this? Perhaps only Gnosis. Gnosis knows just how dearly Enciodes wants to make all of this happen. Enciodes' cries—be they of desperation, worry, fear, or pain—are silent to everyone else. Nobody really knows what goes on in his head, but Gnosis sees some of it (“Our judgments have many overlapping points.”).

So this is an acknowledgment of the darkness reflected back at him by Enciodes. The pain is shared: Enciodes has his own burdens and darkness as well. They are different, but Gnosis does not suffer alone. Though he continues forward alone, he actually isn’t. He’s found the connection he’s been looking for. It’s also another reference to the darkness of their ventures, ushered by Enciodes: his cries pave the path forward.

I'll continue forward, calling to you…

Once again, even with this knowledge of the endless darkness yawing beneath and around him, he keeps going, even with the pain reflected back at him.

What's interesting is that this shift towards a darker tone happens after the hopeful interlude of the previous verse. There’s a moment of respite, a moment of hope; then reality returns, sharp and harsh. As he falls, he sees the vision of the endless future and the melting ice and salvation—but it’s still far away. Between Gnosis’ fall and salvation—between the beginning of his endeavors and the final culmination of his efforts—is a long road of pain and struggle.

It's just a tear that saves me from the darkness, please…

This echoes the opening line. Here, it’s softer and clearer, especially against the backdrop of the previously mentioned “endless darkness.”

This time, I think the tear isn’t his own, not with the “please” at the end; this is someone else’s tear. In contrast to the quiet declaration at the beginning, this is a soft and heartfelt plea. It’s weary and fading and seeking, full of loneliness, searching for that acknowledgment and confirmation of suffering through the eyes of someone else to make it all valid.

And this last verse in particular, and the song in general, brims with this wistful feeling, melancholy yet determined, battered yet resolute. It’s at once lonely and seeking connection, while also embracing isolation and tribulation. It’s full of gloom, of searching the black sky for a star, for a glimmer of light; it’s waiting, dogged and shivering, for the long night to pass into the promised dawn; it’s flying through choking clouds for a glimpse of that clear horizon.

Mini summary included with the song:

Surveying the peaks, the crowd floods over the snowfields. Walking the foothills, the pain feels vivid as if real. I stay unmoved, and silently shout, Heal the World, that comes into my view.

This is where I would like to talk about the L2D which accompanies the song. It depicts pretty much exactly the summary: the video opens up with ice frosting over a frozen bubble before it zooms in on Gnosis walking alone on the slopes of Kjerag, looking down (Kjerag is a frozen bubble itself). From the angle, he’s heading upwards, almost as though he’s approaching that cliff edge in the lyrics. We can’t really see his face, his bangs mostly shielding his expression from view, but it’s cool, neutral: unmoved. Yet still, something seems a little subdued about it, at once pensive and contemplative, as if all the thoughts reflected in the song are running through his head.

It’s not clear if he’s leaving Kjerag or arriving, though I would guess leaving, as you can see a long and winding path behind him—the last line implies Kjerag is coming into sight rather than disappearing, though the meaning stays the same: he's overlooking Kjerag from a lofty and isolated position.

The sky also gets darker as the song progresses, reflecting the slow shift in the lyrics and the heavier final verse: the sun is setting, as the light turns first orange, and behind him it turns to night. You can see two hands of what appear to be a clock spinning on his Arts unit, reflecting the passage of time, and the snowfall gets heavier as the song goes on—and Gnosis disappears with the blizzard, leaving only his Arts unit behind.

The symbolism of that, I think, is both “leaving life” and “standing on the edge.” I can’t help but picture him coming to stand on the brink for but a moment, brief yet infinite, before he goes back and picks the staff up and resumes walking. The staff alone against the snow is another symbol of isolation and perseverance.

Finally, "the pain feels vivid as if real" echoes the repeated “pain is truth” from the lyrics, and implies that the pain he feels is not a physical one but a mental or emotional one, and the silent shout is Gnosis' private wish to reform Kjerag.

Continued in Part 2.

[thetrashqueeeen]

The thing that’s pissing me off about this Faith Becoming a Doctor storyline is nothing to do with Faith and everything to do with how IT IS NOT THAT EASY! I have looked into training as a doctor and had to give up on it because it is logistically impossible for most working class people and casualty could have made a point here!

Right so first things first, there is no conversion degree for healthcare professionals- they just have to do the same graduate entry medical course as every other degree educated person. This degree is 4 years and only offered by a handful of medical schools in the country so let’s pretend Holby Medical School is one of these universities and just suspend our disbelief- moving on

Before she can even apply she would have to take this test called the GAMSAT which is absolutely ridiculous and now don’t get me wrong I think you should prove that you are academically capable of completing a degree before you start it but the GAMSAT is not doing that. For starters, it’s not a pass or fail, you’re ranked by percentile compared to other people who took it, so you don’t just have to prove you CAN do it, you also have to be better than everyone else who tries. Furthermore, the questions aren’t marked like the exams we took in school; or even uni. The entire paper is marked, and then the amount of marks a question is worth is decided based on how many people got it right. For example, a question 90% of people got right would be worth 1 point, but if that same question was only gotten right by 1% of people, it would be worth 10 points, so there is very little way to intelligently work for a better score. It’s also been proven by research that the correlation between GAMSAT percentile and completion of medical degree, academic attainment and retention by the NHS is not statistically significant. There are 2 sitting a year and you have to do them at the specified time and place, making it very hard for someone working shifts (like Faith) to get that test done. To add insult to injury, it is £250 PER ATTEMPT and you have pay for practice exams. Let’s not even get into how Faith is supposed to study for a test that is 5 hours long and 1 section reading comprehension, 1 section essay questions and then a third section which is UNDERGRADUATE level biology and chemistry and A2 level physics with no practice material all while working full time and being a single mother.

Secondly- the course is not entirely funded by student finance. Each year is 9.5k and only about 60% of this is covered by student finance. The other 40% ish is covered by an NHS bursary- except for the first year. This means you need to come up with about 3.8k (from memory) in tuition fees to sit the first year. Your NHS bursary doesn’t kick in until you pass first year and go into year 2. Faith will be paid more than a ‘regular’ nurse, but 4 grand is not a small sum of money and would be hard for her to pull together.

Finally- this is not a course that is offered part time (if they keep her in this show and pretend that she’s doing it part time or, even worse, as evening classes, I am going to LOSE MY MIND) and it’s very, very hard to have a part time job because of the heavy work load and eventual placement shifts. My fist degree was a BA and I had a job the whole time, but I also had low contact hours and no placements to do. There are no bursaries for living costs that I could find and there is no way you could live off a student finance maint loan, if they even offer you one, especially when you’re supporting 2 kids. Faith would not only need to live somewhere with a university that offered GEM, pay for and do well in the GAMSAT and have 4k to pay tuition her first year, she would also have to be able to stop working for 4 whole years.

This is not something she would do over the course of a few weeks, she would be worrying about funding, about living, about the kids and having a menty b about the GAMSAT. casualty could make a really good point here about how someone who would succeed as a doctor, and has committed her entire working life thus far to the NHS, financially could not afford to retrain. Instead I’m sure they are going to take the ‘night classes’ route and I am, in fact, going to LOSE MY MIND

[sizablelad]

the hbomb video has inspired me to think a lot about the video essay culture on youtube and, in general, the academic institution of Queer Theory. there's a lot to be said about how Queer Theory as an academic pursuit has a very different and much more rapid ascent to prominence than a lot of other disciplines that affects the work done in it today. a badillion scholars, particularly scholars of color who because of their positionality might recognize these things out of the isolation of Queer academia, are presently discussing the state of Queer Theory as an academic pursuit and what the goals of this research can/should be, but that's a huge and complicated topic that others know more about.

at a more basic level, i feel like the sheer popularity of the video essay format as academic scholarship but for the Masses has inspired a lot of people without the basic training on how to do research to do research. i mean i'm only a frackin undergrad, but in high school i participated in a program specifically designed to teach us the basic foundation of how to do quality original research. and, simply put, it's a lot less glamorous and a lot more rigorous than people realize (including me-- i've only had a taste of what this research involves from a program that obviously has a limited scope; also only from a humanities perspective). there's a really important part at the very beginning of your research when you figure out the gap, then scope of your research. you have an idea of "oh this topic interests me and i think i want to add to the knowledge around it" and then you figure out a gap in the research that could be addressed by your own research. so i was interesting in queer characters and the potential differences when queer characters are written by queer authors vs non queer authors. so then you conduct a literature review to find out, okay, what research has been done on this topic? what has already been done, how useful would my perspective be on this research, what hasn't been addressed, how can i adjust my research goals so that i am not just conducting a review of others' research, but adding something new to the field. which, conducting a literature review and stopping there is fine! that's okay! but that is different from a goal of doing original research which says something new, and doing that requires a very symbiotic process of review and adjustment between your own research goals and the reality of the research that's already been done.

so i guess in a case like somerton's, he might genuinely want to add something to the field. maybe he loves the ideas he talks about and wants to be like the people that put those ideas to paper. but either he doesn't know how to do research so he gets stuck at doing a historical literature review, or is embarrassed that he might be "not as smart" as the community of people he admires and wants to be a part of, or maybe he just wants to make a quick buck. i don't know. but even if that's the case, him and people like him have demonstrated that they do have the skills to at least find past research, so why not just acknowledge the reality of what you're doing and say "hey look at this research i found and find interesting, i'm going to introduce you, my audience, to these people's work" and emphasize collaborations with the people who's work you're talking about. like with the internet historian video, obviously the video was very well done and funny and enjoyable to watch, and his methodology is different from someone like illuminaughtii's content mill production, which obviously requires a way different approach. what would've headed the WHOLE thing off is if he reached out to the og journalist and said "i read your article and am thinking about doing a video on it, want to endorse (.....and profit from) it?" but that would be assuming a lot of these people are good faith actors, which they aren't.

i don't really know what my point is here. maybe experts in their field are experts for a reason? the academic institution and it's scholarship have it's problems (boy does it), but at least there's processes in place to ensure academic integrity? the video essay as a genre is a cursed hellscape that is a great idea in theory but has been taken over by bad faith actors? misinformation is a plague partially perpetuated by people claiming they act in good faith and audiences can't be expected to constantly be on alert for the myriad of ways creators can take the good will of their audiences and manipulate it for their own personal agendas?

on a side note, this is why (at least, during my more intense youtube days) i tended to be suspicious of youtubers who would either 1) make a lot of research-intensive essays about a lot of different topics in a relatively short amount of time, or 2) make videos about things completely unrelated to their background. i have a hard time believing that jimbob the youtuber was able to become an expert and produce high quality of research in a topic they'd never previously publicly expressed knowledge or interest in. obviously there are exceptions, but with the proliferation and popularity of the video essay it seems like the well has been poisoned in that so many bad faith actors, realizing it's potential, have entered and been proven as bad actors on the video essay scene that it's impossible to see it as a genre with blanket integrity. i don't know the exact history of the genre, but i have to believe that this was not nearly as big a problem as it was before now.

[iris-polaris]

So, you like astrology. Maybe you're an astrologer yourself. You don't push it on anyone (hopefully!) but it's certainly a major interest of yours.

!! AND YET !!

You know there's some arguments "against" astrology, and you're never sure how to respond...or even how to conceptualize why you feel differently.

As a starting point to develop your own opinions, here's food for thought on a common misconception: that all horoscopes and zodiac signs are too "general" or "the same."

!! DISCLAIMER !! This is more for you. While it's healthy to have some disagreements with the humans closest to you, remember that it's never worth your time and energy to "debate" anyone coming at you in bad faith. Ever. If they're not trying to learn about astrology and just want to feel superior to you because they buy Reddit merch or something, go ahead and ignore them. Do your Duolingo instead. Way more productive.

Now then...

Your hopefully well-meaning friend says that all the astrology stuff she's read sounds alike, so it could apply to anyone! It's so vague! Of course everyone believes they're real: each horoscope and zodiac sign is built to be relatable to every reader, so it feels true.

Two things are happening here, though.

🔮 The first is that English is a weird language, so it often fails at describing anything sophisticated.

What's this got to do with astrology? Well: English is hard to master, and even when you do master it, it's still difficult to find the exact words you need...if they exist at all.

Furthermore, humans don't critically read anything anymore. (Sigh.)

We astrology folks know that an Aries sun's drive and a Sagittarius sun's drive are not the same. One's more ambitious, the other adventurous. Succinctly writing this out in a way that makes it perfectly clear, with zero debate, that these are two very different energies? In English? Not easy.

You might say: "But, Bear, you did just succinctly write it."

Thing is...

That still doesn't arrive, fully, at the intricacies of Aries suns vs Sag suns...

And most people aren't coming from the same astrological place as you, in terms of knowledge. When you're too succinct with a layperson, they'll sometimes conflate "ambitious" and "adventurous" to mean the same thing. (Just for instance.)

As someone with two poetry degrees, this hurts me deeply, but there it is.

Additionally...

If you yourself aren't great at finding the exact words you need in any astrological content? Any layperson won't fully know what you mean, nor will they care.

So of course...

All signs and horoscopes seem the same to outsiders if written without crystal clarity. Many of us lack that crystal clarity. No judgement. It's just how English is, and how communication fails inherently sometimes.

This phenomenon is made worse because of...

🔮 The second issue: pop astrology generally needs to be short and succinct.

As I said, the whole clarity thing is...not good when you need entire essays, sometimes, to talk to others about an Aries vs. Sag drive, for example.

That doesn't fit in a newspaper column or easily-scanned blog post. Nor do 99% of the other things we astrologers want to tell everyone and want to talk about. Unfortunately, we only have a limited amount of physical (and mental!) space. So do the humans around us.

This also sucks because a lot of humans only know of astrology from their 20-word local newspaper horoscopes.

And so...

We have to use short-hand. We have to be vague much of the time. We may not know the words we want to use in our horoscopes and descriptions at all, in fact, because English is our second language or we were never great at communicating in the first place.

We often have to point towards meaning in astrology, which isn't at all actually talking about the thing in question. When you're clear, people can't misconstrue you unless they're working in bad faith. (Then you can ignore 'em.) However, when you have to lead people to your astrological conclusions in a roundabout way, using imprecise words, they can wander astray.

It sucks that we're often forced to abandon preciseness for conciseness. But trust me when I say that an Aries having "ambitious drive" and Sagittarius having "adventurous drive" are very much not the same thing.

🔮 In conclusion...

The reason some horoscopes and descriptions of sun signs might seem "vague" or "applicable to anyone" is because of:

the limitations of the English language/communication in general,

and the limitations of digital and physical mediums.

I should have probably led with the disclaimer that this is mostly opinion with no cited sources, but it may help you humans figure things out for yourselves re: this common misconception.

Blessings, cubs!

(Typed up by my wife Mate-chan. Thank you, baby.)

[askthefuturegleeks]

Thank you for joining the campaign to bring the arts to future generations, NICK DUVAL, we’re happy to have you! If you want a refresher on what to do next, feel free to look at the WELCOME CHECKLIST. Please send your account in within the next 48 hours so that you can get started.    

ooc information

NAME: Bee

AGE: 40+

PRONOUNS: She/Her

SHIPS: Nick + Chem

ANTI-SHIPS: Nick + No Chemistry

basic ic information

NAME/AGE: Nicholas ‘Nick’ Dean Duval

BIRTHDAY/ZODIAC:  July 20th, 1994, Cancer: You are the Patriarchs and Matriarchs of the Zodiac. Family means everything to you. You watch over your brood with determination and zeal. You can be counted upon to be at every graduation, wedding, surprise party or barbecue that has anything to do with your relatives. They are definitely your tribe and you are very generous with all of them.

CURRENT OCCUPATION:  App developer.  Co-creator of Social Byte, a new app for finding, reviewing, and booking all types of social engagements- from restaurants to movies, golf courses to amusement parks, concerts to sporting events.

CURRENT LOCATION: Just moved to NYC from Silicon Valley.

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single.  It's complicated.

FC: Curt Mega

twitter post

@technicky: Anything is possible if you have faith and don’t stop trying.  #learnfromyourmistakes   #failsbeforeprogress

in character questions

Answer these in character, and feel free to add gifs into your answers.

1.) What did you want to do with your life when you were younger? What would the child version of yourself think about the path you paved for yourself?

There were so many different things I wanted to be when I was younger.  It was constantly changing and being influenced by media and experiences.  I wanted to be a astronaut, a fireman, a doctor, an actor, a teacher, a military pilot, a rockstar, a chemist, a banker....but when it was time to make decisions about life after Dalton, studying computer science seemed to make the most sense as a jumping off point.  I was thinking web design, maybe programing.  We barely knew what apps were back then.  

Did I see myself leaving Northwestern with my roommate and moving to Silicon Valley to work in a tech think tank?  No.  But California was such an adventure and I loved it.  And as great as the think tank was, leaving it to develop something of our own, just ours, was the best.  Deciding to come to the East coast once the App took off and to go off on my own, is a little daunting, but honestly, it’s time. 

2.) What is your proudest accomplishment? Don’t be afraid to  talk about what it took to achieve it and how you feel about it as well.

Hands down- having created Social Byte.  I don’t know if other creative types get this paternal/maternal feeling over the things they create, but Social Byte is like my child.  

I’m also pretty proud of myself for having decided to branch off on my own now, and come east.  A new adventure.  Even if it's taken me years to do so.

3.) If you could do anything you wanted for one whole day, what would it be and why?

I would do anything.  For me, it would be less about the what and more about the who.  Or who’s.  Spend a whole day with someone or someone's that it’s always easy to be around.  And do whatever, but bask in the enjoyment of their company.  I’ve been away from the people I grew up with, some important people, for too long.  I’d try to fix that.  I’m going to fix that, now that I’m on the East coast.

where are they now? 

Even after the steroid scandal that rocked the Warblers in his senior year, Nick was able to turn that into a real learning and growing experience by making it the topic of his admission essays.  He ended up getting accepted to several schools, including Northwestern University in Chicago, where he ultimately decided to go.  Not going to New York, or the East coast, like it seemed like so many of his friends were was a hard decision for Nick. 

Computer science ended up suiting Nick, and he went on to complete an Master of Science in Information  Technology.  Nick was also lucky that right off the bat he met Ryan, his roommate.  For the second time, Nick found himself with a roommate that he clicked with almost instantly.  They were in the same program, they were roommates, study buddies, sounding boards, and the best of friends.  It made missing his Warbler and Dalton friends a little more bearable. And because it didn’t feel so bad,  Nick was more easily able to try and keep his friendships going with his Warbler and Dalton friends all across the country.  Nick was constantly sending cards, sometimes letters, post cards, emails, posts on various social medias, trying to keep any bits of communication open with everyone.

After completing their MS IT at Northwestern, Ryan convinced Nick to go West with him- where he was from originally.  18 months with the think tank they left it to pursue their own project, and Social Byte was born.  Despite the closeness of their friendship, being roommates for years, moving across the country together, it was strictly platonic.  Which suited Nick just fine anyway.  

Once Social Byte hit the market and exploded, Nick decided it was time to branch out and go off and try something on his own.  This was also influenced by his want to move to the East coast and Ryan’s desire to stay in California.   It’s his birthday week and Nick Duval can’t think of anything more fitting than starting a new adventure, in a new city, closer to quite a few of his high school and even college friends.  

[lemonhemlock]

Unless I have some specific persons blocked, I don't think I've seen anyone outright saying Helaemond shippers are this and that in the tag recently, but there have certainly been some people who've been posting stuff that is bound to get some reactions from the shippers. For example, making posts disproving theory that Helaena's children could be Aemond's while implying how those who believe in it are "eager to argue in favor of minors sleeping of each other" (yeah, nice way to say you are a degenerate and immoral for believing that about two underage persons), writing essays against people who allegedly only want Helaena to be an object of her brothers' desire (but mainly Aemond's as the user in this case likes Helaegon) and don't care about her character at all - meanwhile the very same person said on Twitter Helaena would a hoe if her children are not Aegon's. So it's obviously anti bullshit dressed as fake concern over a character and storyline. It's the whole misogynistic "women should be faithful and loyal to their cheating husbands no matter what" and "Helaegon's marriage sanctity should be respected at all costs" take all over again. All of this plus the bizarre accusations of self-inserting into Helaena. It's just very tiring. I get having different takes and debating theories with fellow users, but some people actually have a history of being antis as far as this ship is concerned and for some reasons are obviously posting in the tag to piss people off. Like it's been said before, you and others were asked to tag your posts using the anti tag for less and did so yet when they are called out they are acting like victims.

I hear you & I'm going start this answer with a general assessment that applies to shipping as a whole, not just this one ship in particular. As in, not everything has to be super binary all the time. There could be aspects of a dynamic that you like, there could be others you don't? But, it's like even highlighting a thing that could prove to be questionable relegates you to the anti tag, when it could very well just be an aspect tabled for discussion. Debates on a ship, like any topic, can go beyond this pro- or anti- dichotomy. You don't HAVE to pick a side all the time.

That being said, with helaemond, I feel like we've been over all those talking points already - paternity, (in)fidelity, Aemond's sense of duty, the show's framing, the fact that we're not pressed if it's not confirmed either - what else is there to say here that we haven't chewed over until it's turned to sludge? No amount of pointing out Aemond's hypocrisy or the fact that he's legally betrothed to a Baratheon girl (so breaking a vital military alliance is really not dutiful at all for him) seems to have any effect, because they're not interested in hearing it, so I don't know. I ultimately find myself agreeing with you, anon, because whatever this is, it's not a conversation carried out in good faith. It doesn't really feel like an honest and measured exchange of views, you know what I mean?

So what are we even doing here, there's not really any sliver of new disk horse for us to pour over, just some artwork posts once in a while? A couple of people posting headcanons sometimes? Come on. This ship is one of the least problematic things about Aemond's character evolution. No one is going to care about this when he carpet bombs the Riverlands.

[jackoshadows]

 “You,” Ned said, kissing her lightly on the brow, “will marry a king and rule his castle, and your sons will be Knights and princes and lords and, yes, perhaps even a High Septon.” - Eddard, A Game of Thrones

My featherbed is deep and soft, and there I’ll lay you down, I’ll dress you all in yellow silk, and on your head a crown - Arya, A Storm of Swords

“Aegon has been shaped for rule since before he could walk. He has been trained in arms, as befits a knight to be, but that was not the end of his education. He reads and writes, he speaks several tongues, he has studied history and law and poetry. A septa has instructed him in the mysteries of the Faith since he was old enough to understand them. He has lived with fisherfolk, worked with his hands, swum in rivers and mended nets and learned to wash his own clothes at need. He can fish and cook and bind up a wound, he knows what it is like to be hungry, to be hunted, to be afraid. Tommen has been taught that kingship is his right. Aegon knows that kingship is his duty, that a king must put his people first, and live and rule for them.” - Kevan, A Dance with Dragons

----------------------------------

So this is an essay of sorts on my speculation/theory that Arya is going to end up as a leader of the North by the end of the series. I will split this into several parts:

Arya and leadership

Arya and Northern leadership

Arya and Nymeria

Skillsets

Importance of being a Warg/Skinchanger

Succession

----------------------------------------

Arya Stark and leadership

“Know the men who follow you,” she heard him tell Robb once, “and let them know you. Don’t ask your men to die for a stranger.“  - Arya, AGoT

Arya has always been a leader rather than a follower. Just like Jon at the wall, she initially chafes at having to follow orders instead of doing what she thinks is the right thing to do. Despite Gendry and Hot Pie being older than her, she’s the one giving the orders and making the plans. She manipulates or forces characters into doing what she wants – getting Gendry to leave Harrenhal and forcing Jaqen to help her free the Northmen.

Arya took the lead, kicking her stolen horse to a brisk heedless trot until the trees close in around her. Hot Pie and Gendry followed as best they could. From time to time Arya glanced over her shoulder, to make sure the two boys had not fallen too far behind, and to see if they were being pursued - Arya, ASoS

Like most of our protagonists, Arya is ambitious and interested in being an active participant at the top. She wanted to become a King’s councilor and build castles. That entire little speech that Varys gives about the ideal candidate for ruling fits Arya to a T.

Arya has gone hungry, scrubbed and cleaned, cooked and kept house, sewed and mended clothes, bound up wounds, been hunted, been scared for her life – and done all this with limited protection. Just survived on her wits. Arya can wield a sword, is fluent in several languages and has studied with a Septa.

We also see war torn Westeros and the suffering of the smallfolk through Arya’s eyes in ACoK and ASoS. It doesn’t matter if it’s Stark or Lannister, the smallfolk suffer the same – Septon Meribald’s ‘Broken Men’ speech in AFfC embodies what Arya observes. After Arya frees the Northmen using weasel soup and Vargo Hoat betrays the Lannisters, there are reprisal killings, torture and rape enacted by Stark bannermen and the sellswords. The smith, Maester and the head maid are executed for merely serving Tywin – something on which they had no choice. Gendry points this out to Arya and she feels guilty for her part in all this.

“I hate this lot worse. Ser Amory was fighting for his lord, but the Mummers are sellswords and turncloaks. Half of them can’t even speak the Common Tongue. Septon Utt likes little boys, Qyburn does black magic, and your friend Biter eats people.”

The worst thing was, she couldn’t even say he was wrong. The Brave Companions did most of the foraging for Harrenhal, and Roose Bolton had given them the task of rooting out Lannisters. Vargo Hoat had divided them into four bands, to visit as many villages as possible. He led the largest group himself, and gave the others to his most trusted captains. She had heard Rorge laughing over Lord Vargo’s way of finding traitors. All he did was return to places he had visited before under Lord Tywin’s banner and seize those who had helped him. – Arya, ACoK

"It’s not a village, it’s only black stones and old bones. “Did the Lannisters kill the people who lived here?” Arya asked as she helped Anguy dry the horses.

“No.” He pointed. “Look at how thick the moss grows on the stones. No one’s moved them for a long time. And there’s a tree growing out of the wall there, see? This place was put to the torch a long time ago.”

“Who did it, then?” asked Gendry.

“Hoster Tully.” Notch was a stooped thin grey-haired man, born in these parts. “This was Lord Goodbrook’s village. When Riverrun declared for Robert, Goodbrook stayed loyal to the king, so Lord Tully came down on him with fire and sword. After the Trident, Goodbrook’s son made his peace with Robert and Lord Hoster, but that didn’t help the dead none.”

A silence fell."  - Arya, ASoS

"Wolves, she thought again. Like me. Was this her pack? How could they be Robb’s men? She wanted to hit them. She wanted to hurt them. She wanted to cry.” - Arya, ASoS

The smallfolk in the Riverlands are caught between the Starks, Tullys and Lannisters with no good choices. And on the ground level, Arya sees this, understands this and acknowledges this. Her actions benefited house Stark and no one else. She understands the cost of war.

Arya is also very keen on justice. In that she not only thinks that characters deserve justice, but she wants to actively participate and deliver justice. She considers the execution of Dareon from the NW as a just one.

Dareon had been a deserter from the Night's Watch; he had deserved to die. - Arya, AFfC

“Guilty!” Arya shouted with the rest. “Guilty, guilty, kill him, guilty!” …

Arya could only think of Mycah and all the stupid prayers she’d prayed for the Hound to die. If there were gods, why didn’t Lord Beric win? She knew the Hound was guilty… - Arya, ASoS

Her father beat her so often and so brutally that she was never truly free of pain or fear until she came to us.”

“Did you kill him?”

“She asked the gift for herself, not for her father.”

You should have killed him.“ - Arya, ADWD

Arya drew back from him. "He killed the slave?" That did not sound right. "He should have killed the masters!" – Arya, aDwD

---------------------------------

Arya and Northern leadership

I would sooner my men die fighting for the Ned’s little girl than alone and hungry in the snow, weeping tears that freeze upon their cheeks. - Hugo Wull

The North has famously never had a female leader in House Stark. So is it possible for valiant Ned’s precious little girl to become the first Lady Stark to lead the North?

In terms of personality, Arya resembles some of the other female leaders/members of Northern houses. She is bold and forward like Lyanna Mormont and Wylla Manderly. She has trained with the sword and learned how to use a bow and arrow. She proactively engineers her own escape like Alys Karstark. Characters like Ygritte and Alys remind Jon Snow of Arya.

Arya venerates Ned Stark. She follows his advice as much as Robb, Bran and Jon do. Even more so. She executes a NW brother for desertion. And that is important for the Starks.

I should kill them myself. Whenever her father had condemned a man to death, he did the deed himself with Ice, his greatsword. - Arya, ACoK

The blood of the First Men still flows in the veins of the Starks, and we hold to the belief that the man who passes the sentence should swing the sword. - Bran, AGoT

“The Starks do not use headsmen. Ned always said that the man who passes the sentence should swing the blade, though he never took any joy in the duty.” - Catelyn, ACoK

“Rickard Karstark, Lord of Karhold.” Robb lifted the heavy axe with both hands. “Here in sight of gods and men, I judge you guilty of murder and high treason. In mine own name I condemn you. With mine own hand I take your life. Would you speak a final word?” - Catelyn, ASoS

The pale morning sunlight ran up and down his blade as Jon clasped the hilt of the bastard sword with both hands and raised it high. “If you have any last words, now is the time to speak them,” he said, expecting one last curse. - Jon, ADwD

Arya is one of the Starkiest Starks of the whole lot. She is also the only Stark to actually have the Stark look. She is stubborn and determined to do things the Stark way. She often uses her father’s advice to guide her way.

Her father used to say that a lord needed to eat with his men, if he hoped to keep them. “Know the men who follow you,” she heard him tell Robb once, “and let them know you. Don’t ask your men to die for a stranger.“ - Arya, aGoT

Arya had loved nothing better than to sit at her father’s table and listen to them talk. She had loved listening to the men on the benches too; to freeriders tough as leather, courtly knights and bold young squires, grizzled old men-at-arms.- Arya, AGoT

Whenever her father had condemned a man to death, he did the deed himself with Ice, his greatsword. “If you would take a man’s life, you owe it to him go look him in the face and hear his last words,” she’d heard him tell Robb and Jon once. - Arya, ACoK

Now there are theories that it is future Bran who was communicating with Arya through the weirwood at Harrenhal, but she does gain strength from her father’s words when she prays to the Old Gods.

Gooseprickles rose on Arya’s skin, and for an instant she felt dizzy. Then, so faintly, it seemed as if she heard her father’s voice. “When the snows fall and the white winds blow, the lone wolf dies, but the pack survives,” he said. “But there is no pack,” she whispered to the weirwood. Bran and Rickon were dead, the Lannisters had Sansa, Jon had gone to the Wall. “I’m not even me now, I’m Nan.” “You are Arya of Winterfell, daughter of the north. You told me you could be strong. You have the wolf blood in you.” - Arya, ACoK

And while Arya is travelling incognito, GRRM keeps her connected to the North, house Stark and the Northern plot. She starts her journey from KL with a NW brother Yoren. She’s disguised as a boy like Danny Flint, Manderly requests a song about brave Danny Flint at Ramsay’s wedding with ‘Arya’. In the Riverlands, Arya’s plot intersects with her father’s bannermen, she participates in the capture of Harrenhal for house Stark and is there for Roose Bolton’s war council. She meets both Roose Bolton and Aenys Frey – our antagonists in Winterfell facing off against Stannis in ADwD. She meets Robett Glover – who is currently in White Harbor - when she lets him out of the dungeons. She gets Jaqen to help her father’s men.

“Vargo Hoat’s come back with prisoners. I saw their badges. There’s a Glover, from Deepwood Motte, he’s my father’s man. The rest too, mostly.” All of a sudden, Arya knew why her feet had brought her here. “You have to help me get them out.” – Arya, ACoK

Arya looked. She knew all of her father’s men. The three in the grey cloaks were strangers. Arya, AGoT

Twin towers. Sunburst. Bloody man. Battle-axe. The battle-axe is for Cerwyn, and the white sun on black is Karstark. They’re northmen. My father’s men, and Robb’s. - Arya, ACoK

Harwin?” Arya whispered. It was! Under the beard and the tangled hair was the face of Hullen’s son, who used to lead her pony around the yard, ride at quintain with Jon and Robb, and drink too much on feast days. He was thinner, harder somehow, and at Winterfell he had never worn a beard, but it was him—her father’s man. Arya, ASoS

“I bet there are Winterfell men too.” Her father’s men, the Young Wolf’s men, the direwolves of Stark. - Arya, ASoS

Arya is also involved in betrothals/marriage – first to Elmar Frey and then married off to Ramsay Bolton to hold the North. As a side note, her connection to all these bastards is indeed interesting - Elmar Frey, Ramsay Bolton, Gendry and Jon Snow. Is GRRM trying to say something here?

We now have the Northerners and Freys that Arya sees in Harrenhal transposed to Winterfell and ‘her father’s men’ rising up for Arya Stark.

Now, we can speculate and assume that these Northerners would have done the same for the other Starks, but that’s not the point here. In the books, GRRM has written this story to revolve around Arya. The mountain clans are marching for ARYA. The Northern houses are fighting alongside Stannis for ARYA. When lady Barbrey Dustin points out the anger of the Northmen at the treatment of ‘Valiant Ned's precious little girl’ she is talking about ARYA.

GRRM has Stannis wanting to rescue Arya for Jon. He has Mance trying to rescue Arya for Jon. He has Jon breaking his vows and dying trying to rescue Arya. A large part of what drives this plot forward is that it’s Arya, and her special relationship with Jon Snow influences a lot of what is happening south of the wall. The story only happens this way with Arya in the North. And that’s why it’s Arya’s story and not that of any other Stark. Superimposing this or that Stark in place of Arya to make a case for why they would be leader of the North makes no sense. GRRM writing in the marriage of Arya Stark to hold the North makes the case for why Arya is important to the North.

So, Arya has actively helped free Northmen in the Riverlands, engaged with important Northerners and Freys at Harrenhal and drives the plot to take down the Boltons in the North. With her leadership skills, her ability to wield a weapon and fight, looking like Ned, following in Ned’s footsteps and advice, her fierce personality, her loyalty to bannermen, her desire for justice and to help the weak and powerless, her huge direwolf - she would be like the Kings in the North of yore.  I think the Northerners will be fine with Arya Stark being the Stark in charge.

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Arya and Nymeria

“What if the wolves come?” “Yield,” Arya suggested - Arya, ACoK

The direwolves are an important part of the books, and an important aspect of the Starks.They are as much a part of the Starks as Dany’s dragons are a part of her. They cannot be ignored as unimportant pets who will end up serving no purpose.

“He is part of you, Robb. To fear him is to fear you.”  - Catelyn, ASoS

Ghost did not count. Ghost was closer than a friend. Ghost was part of him - Jon, ADWD

“Part of you is Summer, and part of Summer is you. You know that, Bran.” - Bran, ACoK

“Wolves and women wed for life,” Haggon often said. “You take one, that’s a marriage. The wolf is part of you from that day on, and you’re part of him. Both of you will change.” - Varamyr, ADWD

You have five trueborn children,” Jon said. “Three sons, two daughters. The direwolf is the sigil of your House. Your children were meant to have these pups, my lord…The direwolf graces the banners of House Stark,” Jon pointed out. -  Bran, AGoT

“Roose Bolton has Lord Eddard’s daughter. To thwart him White Harbor must have Ned’s son … and the direwolf. The wolf will prove the boy is who we say he is, should the Dreadfort attempt to deny him.“ - Davos, ADWD

GRRM has mentioned several times that they are important.

The Lannisters are always likening themselves to lions, for example, and their motto “Hear me roar” speaks of a certain way of looking at life. But I think for the Starks it goes a little bit beyond that, especially in this generation, with these direwolves. It’s more than just a handy metaphor with them - GRRM, interview

"Wolves have been part of European folklore, of which America's descended, going back thousands of years. In Rome, Romulus and Remus -- there's always been this relationship between wolves and men." That relationship is seen time and again in Martin's series, and it's one that will Martin says will continue as the last two books are eventually released. Arya's wolf, Nymeria, in particular, will play an important role. "You know, I don't like to give things away." says Martin, a grin spreading across his face. "But you don't hang a giant wolf pack on the wall unless you intend to use it." - GRRM interview

The direwolves are important especially for Arya whose theme is ‘The lone wolf dies but the pack survives’ and there are constant mentions of the pack in her POV chapters. Nymeria is an alpha, a leader of her pack like Arya is a leader of hers.

“She says there’s this great pack, hundreds of them, mankillers. The one that leads them is a she-wolf, a bitch from the seventh hell.” - Arya, ACoK

Throughout ACoK and ASoS, Arya mentions the wolves in the Riverlands. They appear to be just ahead of her or behind her. In her chapters there are mentions of wolves eating people, of Roose going wolf hunting. It’s almost like the wolves are traveling with her. They even help her escape – the wolf howl giving the signal – from harrenhal. And it’s possible the pack was picking off Roose Bolton’s riders chasing Arya because they were following right behind.

She could hear the sound of her own breath, and the wolves as well, a great pack of them now. They are closer than the one I heard in the godswood, she thought. They are calling to me. - Arya, ACoK

Once, from the crest of a ridge, she spied dark shapes crossing a stream in the valley behind them, and for half a heartbeat she feared that Roose Bolton’s riders were on them, but when she looked again she realized they were only a pack of wolves. She cupped her hands around her mouth and howled down at them, “Ahooooooooo, ahooooooooo.” When the largest of the wolves lifted its head and howled back, the sound made Arya shiver.   - Arya ASoS

Nymeria keeps amassing this huge wolf pack and Arya being a strong warg can sense this

She was no little girl in the dream; she was a wolf, huge and powerful, and when she emerged from beneath the trees in front of them and bared her teeth in a low rumbling growl, she could smell the rank stench of fear from horse and man alike. - Arya, ASoS

She dreamed of wolves most every night. A great pack of wolves, with her at the head. She was bigger than any of them, stronger, swifter, faster. And her brothers and sisters were with her, many and more of them, fierce and terrible and hers. - Arya, ASoS

In her wolf dreams she was swift and strong, running down her prey with her pack at her heels. - Cat of the Canals, AFfC

The wolf dreams also helps Arya connect to Bran, Jon and Rickon. We see Ghost able to sense the other direwolves and Bran trying to communicate with Jon.

Nymeria is a grey wolf and the stark sigil is a grey wolf on a white background.

 “The rain had washed the guard’s blood off her fingers, she wore a sword across her back, wolves were prowling through the dark like lean grey shadows, and Arya Stark was unafraid.” - Arya, ACoK

“Arya had her father’s eyes, the grey eyes of the Starks.” - Reek, ADwD

What’s in a name? I have already mentioned in another post, the symbolism of the names for the direwolves and them being an indication of the future for the Starks. Arya’s direwolf is named Nymeria – a Rhoynish warrior queen who led her people to safety. Something that Arya may well do in the future when the North is under attack from the Others.

More importantly, Nymeria in Dorne changed the customs and rules of house Martell to follow those of Rhoynar and allowed for female rulers. Nymeria herself was the first female leader and was followed by her daughter. Nymeria changed the norm for Dorne and we could see the same happening with Arya Stark in the North.

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Skills and Education

Look with your eyes, Syrio had said, listen with your ears.- Arya, ACoK

Education at Winterfell:

Arya was mainly taught by Septa Mordane and received the same education as Sansa. She would have been taught history and about the Faith by the Septa, she can read and write, and is good with sums. She’s better than Sansa at managing a household. She can ride a horse like a Northman and is an excellent swimmer. She knows some high Valyrian. Besides the Septa, Arya also hangs around Ned Stark when he is teaching the boys. Many of his words of wisdom that she remembers is from when he is teaching the boys. She mingles with her father’s men, the cooks, the stable boys etc.

Kings Landing:

Water Dancing style of swordfighting from Syrio Forel.

Harrenhal:

Being incognito allows Arya to move around like a mouse or the ghost of Harrenhal and observe and learn things. She is privy to Roose Bolton’s war council and listens to them discuss the Northern campaign against the Lannisters. We get the first inkling of the Red Wedding in these chapters between Roose and the Freys.

Arya observes the different people, analyzes their movements and figures out how to approach them.

The night she was caught, the Lannister men had been nameless strangers with faces as alike as their nasal helms, but she’d come to know them all. You had to know who was lazy and who was cruel, who was smart and who was stupid. You had to learn that even though the one they called Shitmouth had the foulest tongue she’d ever heard, he’d give you an extra piece of bread if you asked, while jolly old Chiswyck and soft-spoken Raff would just give you the back of their hand. - Arya, ACoK

And as lords and ladies never notice the little grey mice under their feet, Arya heard all sorts of secrets just by keeping her ears open as she went about her duties. Pretty Pia from the buttery was a slut who was working her way through every knight in the castle. The wife of the gaoler was with child, but the real father was either Ser Alyn Stackspear or a singer Lord Lefford made mock of ghosts at table, but always kept a candle burning by his bed. Ser Dunaver’s squire Jodge could not hold his water when he slept. The cooks despised Ser Harys Swyft and spit in all his food. Once she even overheard Maester Tothmure’s serving girl confiding to her brother about some message that said Joffrey was a bastard and not the rightful king at all. “Lord Tywin told him to burn the letter and never speak such filth again,” the girl whispered. - Arya, ACoK

She aids in the escape of the near hundred Northmen imprisoned in the dungeons and even Roose is impressed enough to make her his cupbearer. And the next time, she conceives of, plans and executes their entire escape all by herself. She plans for the logistics – weapons, transportation, people, travel route, what to wear.  She makes sure she is warmly dressed, takes the map from Roose’s chamber, uses her position of cupbearer to manipulate several men,  manipulates Gendry into escaping with her, takes down the guard and leads them away. It’s an endeavor that showcases her intelligence, cunning, determination, ability to strategize and lead.

Arya also shows a lot of restraint and keeps her secrets. She doesn’t trust the Glovers or any of the Northmen in Harrenhal - and considering the Red Wedding, it’s a good decision.

Their captors permitted no chatter. A broken lip taught Arya to hold her tongue. Others never learned at all. - Arya, ACoK

Arya watched them die and did nothing. What good did it do you to be brave? One of the women picked for questioning had tried to be brave, but she had died screaming like all the rest. There were no brave people on that march, only scared and hungry ones. - Arya, ACoK

On the road Arya had felt like a sheep, but Harrenhal turned her into a mouse. She was grey as a mouse in her scratchy wool shift, and like a mouse she kept to the crannies and crevices and dark holes of the castle, scurrying out of the way of the mighty.- Arya, ACoK

Braavos:

Arya’s education here is not limited to killing for the Faceless Men. She is also educated in poisons and languages. She improves on her high Valyrian and is now fluent in Braavosi and other Essosi languages. She learns acting/mummery. Not showing emotions on one’s face, detecting emotions in another person.

“A man does not need to be a wizard to know truth from falsehood, not if he has eyes. You need only learn to read a face. Look at the eyes. The mouth. The muscles here, at the corners of the jaw, and here, where the neck joins the shoulders.” He touched her lightly with two fingers. “Some liars blink. Some stare. Some look away. Some lick their lips. Many cover their mouths just before they tell a lie, as if to hide their deceit. Other signs may be more subtle, but they are always there. A false smile and a true one may look alike, but they are as different as dusk from dawn. Can you tell dusk from dawn?”

Arya nodded, though she was not certain that she could. “Then you can learn to see a lie… and once you do, no secret will be safe from you.”  - Arya, AFFC

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People skills

“I will remember, Your Grace," said Sansa, though she had always heard that love was a surer route to the people's loyalty than fear. If I am ever a queen, I'll make them love me.” - Sansa, ACoK

Arya’s ability to make friends wherever she goes highlights her people skills. And Arya is able to communicate and connect with people from all walks of life.

Sansa knew all about the sorts of people Arya liked to talk to: squires and grooms and serving girls, old men and naked children, rough-spoken freeriders of uncertain birth. Arya would make friends with anybody. - Sansa, AGoT

She had loved listening to the men on the benches too; to freeriders tough as leather, courtly knights and bold young squires, grizzled old men-at-arms. She used to throw snowballs at them and help them steal pies from the kitchen. Their wives gave her scones and she invented names for their babies and played monsters-and-maidens and hide-the-treasure and come-into-my-castle with their children., Arya, AGoT

Her father used to say that a lord needed to eat with his men, if he hoped to keep them. “Know the men who follow you,” she heard him tell Robb once, “and let them know you. Don’t ask your men to die for a stranger.“ - Arya, AGoT

Cat had made friends along the wharves; porters and mummers, ropemakers and sailmenders, taverners, Brewers and bakers and beggars and whores - Cat of the Canals, AFfC

Her girls were nice as well; Blushing Bethany and the Sailor’s Wife, one-eyed Yna who could tell your fortune from a drop of blood, pretty little Lanna, even Assadora, the Ibbenese woman with the mustache. They might not be beautiful, but they were kind to her - Cat of the Canals, AFfC

She’s also loyal to her pack. She doesn’t betray Jon even to her father. She helps free her father’s men. Despite Gendry talking of leaving Lommy or Weasel behind, she refuses. And despite the odds, she tries to help Gendry.

It didn’t matter. The only thing that mattered was that they had Gendry. Even if he was stubborn and stupid, she had to get him out. She wondered if they knew that the queen wanted him. - Arya, ACoK

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Importance of being a Warg/Skinchanger

She was the night wolf, no scraps of skin could frighten her. - Arya, ADwD

Since this is a fantasy series, magic is a big part of the story with a magical existential apocalyptic threat on the horizon. The North is the first bastion facing this threat. Jon and Dany both have magical pets and prophetic dreams. Bran is the 3ER. They are leaders or will become leaders by the end. Arya is a strong warg/skinchanger. Apart from Jon and Bran, she’s the only other Stark to use these abilities so far. As GRRM as indicated, having a direwolf is going to be useful in battle – we are going to be seeing direwolves involved in the battle for Winterfell for example. Arya is able to warg Nymeria from all the way over in Braavos. She skinchanges cats and sees through their eyes, when she is blind. She is deft with a sword, knife and decent with a bow and arrow (she could be better now using her FM senses). She would be an effective fighter to have against the Others and her warging skills could prove useful in battle.

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Succession

I’m not a lady, Arya wanted to tell her, I’m a wolf. - Arya, ASoS

And finally we come to succession. This is the hardest part and entirely speculation and we need the next book to get an inkling of where GRRM is heading towards. I am also basing all of this on Hibberd more or less confirming that King Bran on the Iron Throne is GRRM’s ending.

So of the true born Starks, Arya is pretty much last in line. With the inclusion of Robb’s will, we have 5 Starks left. Bran is the rightful heir to the North. Taking him out of the running, leaves Jon, Rickon, Sansa and Arya. Assuming Jon ends up North of the wall – in his dreams the Old Kings in the North in the crypts reject him, maybe foreshadowing that he doesn’t belong in Winterfell - that leaves Rickon, Sansa and Arya.

As for Sansa, again there is a plot significant reason for why GRRM has put an obstacle in her path, allowing for Arya to jump the queue. Sansa is currently married to Tyrion Lannister, a marriage that cannot be easily annulled (With an enemy regime in KL) or ignored like the show did. Robb Stark has most likely disinherited/removed her from the line of succession and named a legitimized Jon Stark his heir and Lord of Winterfell. If he has the support of the Northern houses who want an experienced, older Stark to lead them, Jon Stark could well be the next KITN over Rickon Stark. I don’t think a 7 year old Rickon would object to Jon in charge. So that makes it Jon Stark, Rickon Stark and Arya Stark.

Does Rickon have to die for Arya to become Wardeness of the North? It’s possible Rickon dies, but it’s also possible he doesn’t.  It could be that Rickon does not want to lead the North – by the end of the book, he would be 8 or 9. Of course there’s the argument of a regent doing the job for Rickon until he’s ready. Or, he could just give way to his sister because he wants to. Something similar to Aemon refusing the throne and it passing to his younger brother Aegon.

Or we could have the traditional situation where Rickon becomes lord of Winterfell as next in line, while it’s Arya who is involved in running the day to day affairs. However, that would very much be status quo - with Rickon at WF and Bran down south in KL, it would be men ending up in positions of power everywhere once again, except maybe Dorne. If this happens, then Arya would be a leader of the North, but the Stark line would continue with the male line.  

It’s possible Jon Stark as King could change things for the North. Jon treats the spearwives the same as the brothers of the NW, he respects Val’s abilities, he trusts in Alys Karstark. If Rickon refuses the mantle, it could very well be that Jon Stark relinquishes his position to his favorite person ever, Arya Stark, to be the next Wardeness of the North.  Thus paving the way for Arya Stark to be the first female leader of the North like her hero Nymeria in Dorne.

It would be fitting for the character who introduced Jon Snow to equal rights for women.

“The Lannisters are proud,” Jon observed. “You’d think the royal sigil would be sufficient, but no. He makes his mother’s House equal in honor to the king’s.”

“The woman is important too!” Arya protested. - Arya, AGoT

Could King Jon reverse Sansa’s disinheritance after her marriage is annulled when KL is in friendly hands? Sure. But we don’t know how the Sansa/LF/Vale group will react to Jon as KITN and whether they will mount a challenge in Sansa’s name. And if Jon has to choose between Sansa and Arya as to whom he wants in charge of Winterfell, we know who it is he will think is more capable and will always choose.

I do think Winterfell succession will not be as clearcut as many Stark fans are hoping. Too many factions supporting the different Starks. GRRM loves to write about dysfunctional families and the Starks are not anything special in that regard. TWoW will tell us of whether there will be any kind of Stark civil war.

Is Arya too young for all this? I predict that by the time we get to the end of the books, about 5 years would have gone by. At 14, Arya would still need a regent – one of the many lords of the houses in the North. But I think considering her experiences, skillsets, a huge direwolf, Ned Stark’s wisdom and strong connections to the North, she will be an able leader. As GRRM said,

“[Arya is] older than some of the 40-year-olds in the book.” - GRRM

Either way, whether she gets Winterfell or not, Arya will end up as a leader in the North. Either she rules for Rickon and takes care of the day to day responsibilities or she does so in her own right as Lady of Winterfell/Wardeness of the North. She’s not going anywhere or sailing off on a boat. The show’s ending makes absolutely no sense for a character yearning for home in 5 books after going on the nightmare ‘adventure’ from hell. She will be in the North, in Winterfell, being a leader and continuing Ned Stark’s legacy.  She will counsel her brothers and build and her people will love her just like they loved her father.

So in conclusion, I think there is enough story, character build up, characterization and set up for Arya to go North and take over as a leader of house Stark to face the threat of the Others along with Bran, Jon, Dany and Tyrion.

[be-gay-do-heists]

hello yall :) the holy month of elul started last night, which is typically a time for contemplation, so since it is impossible for me to stop thinking about leverage, i decided to write an essay. hope anyone interested in reading it enjoys, and that it makes at least a little sense!! spoilers for leverage redemption

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Leverage, Judaism, and “Doing the Work”: An Essay for Elul

When it comes to Elul and the approaching High Holidays, Leverage might seem like an odd topic to meditate on.

The TNT crime drama that ran from 2008-2012, and which released a new season this summer following its renewal, centers on a group of found-family thieves who help the victims of corporations and oligarchs (sometimes based on real-world examples), using wacky heists and cons to bring down the rich and powerful. In one episode, the team’s clients want to reclaim their father’s prized Glimt piece that had been stolen in the Shoah and never returned, but aside from this and the throwaway lines and jokes standard for most mainstream television, there’s not a ton textually Jewish about Leverage. However, despite this, I have found that the show has strong resonance among Jewish fans, and lots of potential for analysis along Jewish themes. This tends to focus on one character in particular: the group’s brilliant, pop culture-savvy, and personable hacker, Alec Hardison, played by the phenomenally talented Aldis Hodge.

I can’t remember when or where I first encountered a reading of Hardison as Jewish, but not only is this a somewhat popular interpretation, it doesn’t feel like that much of a leap. In the show itself, Hardison has a couple of the aforementioned throwaway lines that potentially point to him being Jewish, even if they’re only in service of that moment’s grift. It’s hard to point to what exactly makes reading Hardison as Jewish feel so natural. My first guess is the easy way Hardison fits into the traditional paradigms of Jewish masculinity explored by scholars such as Daniel Boyarin (2). Most of the time, the hacker is not portrayed as athletic or physical; he is usually the foil to the team’s more physically-adept characters like fighter Eliot, or thief Parker. Indeed, Hardison’s strength is mental, expressed not only through his computer wizardry but his passions for science, technology, music, popular media, as well as his studious research into whatever scenario the group might come up against. In spite of his self-identification as a “geek,” Hardison is nevertheless confident, emotionally sensitive, and secure in his masculinity. I would argue he is representative of the traditional Jewish masculine ideal, originating in the rabbinic period and solidified in medieval Europe, of the dedicated and thoughtful scholar (3). Another reason for popular readings of Hardison as Jewish may be the desire for more representation of Jews of color. Although mainstream American Jewish institutions are beginning to recognize the incredible diversity of Jews in the United States (4), and popular figures such as Tiffany Haddish are amplifying the experiences of non-white Jews, it is still difficult to find Jews of color represented in popular media. For those eager to see this kind of representation, then, interpreting Hardison, a black man who places himself tangential to Jewishness, in this way is a tempting avenue.

Regardless, all of the above remains fan interpretation, and there was little in the text of the show that seriously tied Judaism into Hardison’s identity. At least, until we got this beautiful speech from Hardison in the very first episode of the renewed show, directed at the character of Harry Wilson, a former corporate lawyer looking to atone for the injustice he was partner to throughout his career:

“In the Jewish faith, repentance, redemption, is a process. You can’t make restitution and then promise to change. You have to change first. Do the work, Harry. Then and only then can you begin to ask for forgiveness. [...] So this… this isn’t the win. It’s the start, Harry.”

I was floored to hear this speech, and thrilled that it explained the reboot’s title, Leverage: Redemption. Although not mentioned by its Hebrew name, teshuvah forms the whole basis for the new season. Teshuvah is the concept of repentance or atonement for the sins one has committed. Stemming from the root shuv/shuva, it carries the literal sense of “return.” In a spiritual context, this usually means a return to G-d, of finding one’s way back to holiness and by extension good favor in the eyes of the Divine. But equally important is restoring one’s relationships with fellow humans by repairing any hurt one has caused over the past year. This is of special significance in the holy month of Elul, leading into Rosh haShanah, the Yamim Noraim, and Yom Kippur, but one can undertake a journey of redemption at any point in time. That teshuvah is a journey is a vital message for Harry to hear; one job, one reparative act isn’t enough to overturn years of being on the wrong side of justice, to his chagrin. As the season progresses, we get to watch his path of teshuvah unfold, with all its frustrations and consequences. Harry grows into his role as a fixer, not only someone who can find jobs and marks for the team, but fixes what he has broken or harmed.

So why was Hardison the one to make this speech?

I do maintain that it does provide a stronger textual basis for reading Hardison as Jewish by implication (though the brief on-screen explanation for why he knows about teshuvah, that his foster-parent Nana raised a multi-faith household, is important in its own merit, and meshes well with his character traits of empathy and understanding for diverse experiences). However, beyond this, Hardison isn’t exactly an archetypical model for teshuvah. In the original series, he was the youngest character of the main ensemble, a hacking prodigy in the start of his adult career, with few mistakes or slights against others under his belt. In one flashback we see that his possibly first crime was stealing from the Bank of Iceland to pay off his Nana’s medical bills, and that his other early hacking exploits were in the service of fulfilling personal desires, with only those who could afford to pay the bill as targets. Indeed, in the middle of his speech, Hardison points to Eliot, the character with the most violent and gritty past who views his work with the Leverage team as atonement, for a prime example of ongoing teshuvah. So while no one is perfect and everyone has a reason for doing teshuvah, this question of why Hardison is the one to give this series-defining speech inspired me to look at his character choices and behavior, and see how they resonate with a different but interrelated Jewish principle, that of tikkun olam. 

Tikkun olam is literally translated as “repairing the world,” and can take many different forms, such as protecting the rights of vulnerable people in society, or giving tzedakah (5). In modern times, tikkun olam is often the rallying cry for Jewish social activists, particularly among environmentalists for whom literally restoring the health of the natural world is the key goal. Teshuvah and tikkun olam are intertwined (the former is the latter performed at an interpersonal level) and both hold a sense of fixing or repairing, but tikkun olam really revolves around a person feeling called to address an injustice that they may have not had a personal hand in creating. Hardison’s sense of a universal scale of justice which he has the power to help right on a global level and his newfound drive to do humanitarian work, picked up sometime after the end of the original series, make tikkun olam a central value for his character. This is why we get this nice bit of dialogue from Eliot to Hardison in the second episode of the reboot, when the latter’s outside efforts to organize international aid start distracting him from his work with the team: “Is [humanitarian work] a side gig? In our line of work, you’re one of the best. But in that line of work… you’re the only one, man.” The character who most exemplifies teshuvah reminds Hardison of his amazing ability to effect change for the better on a huge stage, to do some effective tikkun olam. It’s this acknowledgement of where Hardison can do the most good that prompts the character’s absence for the remainder of the episodes released thus far, turning his side gig into his main gig.

With this in mind, it will be interesting to see where Hardison’s arc for this season goes. Separated from the rest of the team, the hacker still has remarkable power to change the world, because it is, after all, the “age of the geek.” However, he is still one person. For all that both teshuvah and tikkun olam are individual responsibilities and require individual decision-making and effort, the latter especially relies on collective work to actually make things happen. Hardison leaving is better than trying to do humanitarian work and Leverage at the same time, but there’s only so long he can be the “only one” in the field before burning out. I’m reminded of one of the most famous (for good reason) maxims in Judaism:

It is not your duty to finish the work, but neither are you free to neglect it. (6)

Elul is traditionally a time for introspection and heeding the calls to repentance. After a year where it’s never been easier to feel powerless and drained by everything going on around us, I think it’s worth taking the time to examine what kind of work we are capable of in our own lives. Maybe it’s fixing the very recent and tangible hurts we’ve left behind, like Harry. Maybe it’s the little changes for the better that we make every day, motivated by our sense of responsibility, like Eliot. And maybe it’s the grueling challenge of major social change, like Hardison. And if any of this work gets too much, who can we fall back on for support and healing? Determining what needs repair, working on our own scale and where our efforts are most helpful, and thereby contributing to justice in realistic ways means that we can start the new year fresh, having contemplated in holiday fashion how we can be better agents in the world.

Shana tovah u’metukah and ketivah tovah to all (7), and may the work we do in the coming year be for good!

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(1) Disclaimer: everybody’s fandom experiences are different, and this is just what I’ve picked up on in my short time watching and enjoying this show with others.

(2) See, for example, the introduction and first chapter of Boyarin’s book Unheroic Conduct: The Rise of Heterosexuality and the Invention of the Jewish Man (I especially recommend at least this portion if you are interested in queer theory and Judaic studies). There he explores the development of Jewish masculinity in direct opposition to Christian masculine standards.

(3) I might even go so far as to place Hardison well within the Jewish masculine ideal of Edelkayt, gentle and studious nobility (although I would hesitate to call him timid, another trait associated with Edelkayt). Boyarin explains that this scholarly, non-athletic model of man did not carry negative associations in the historical Jewish mindset, but was rather the height of attractiveness (Boyarin, 2, 51).

(4) Jews of color make up 20% of American Jews, according to statistics from Be’chol Lashon, and this number is projected to increase as American demographics continue to change: https://globaljews.org/about/mission/. 

(5) Tzedakah is commonly known as righteous charity. According to traditional authority Maimonides, it should be given anonymously and without embarrassment to the person in need, generous, and designed to help the recipient become self-sufficient.

(6) Rabbi Tarfon, Pirkei Avot, 2:16

(7) “A good and sweet year” and “a good inscription [in the Book of Life]”