#cos hes never polite lmao

[angelgendered]

Yknow considering my mum was a self proclaimed socialist feminist who did work with the campaign for nuclear disarmament in the 80s and other related causes, you sure wouldn't guess it now. She loves keir starmer, casual transphobia and denial that trans people face anh issus ever, being vocally racist, especially against black and Asian folks, being pro Israel and devil's advocate when there's a GENOCIDE HAPPENING, she doesn't think disabled people including herself should have lives (my granddad who was in a powered wheelchair most of his life would hate her now I hate to say it but) she thinks black people are reverse racist when they call her out on her yt privilege instead of just yknow listening to what they have to say nd to top it all off she said the other day that the cass report is right, and earlier today said that she was probably going tk vote reform because 'we need to look after our own'

Like babe

You're a populist nationalist tiptoeing dangerously into fascist territory. No wonder none of your friends talk to you anymore

[ashwhowrites]

OMG I CANT BELIEVE REQS ARE OPEN YAYAAYAYAYAYAYYYYY

okay so basically i was wondering if you could do something with popular!bully!eddie x sensitive!reader

okay okay. so reader and eddie like each other but its a secret from the other and eddie bullies her lightly (cos he doesnt know how to deal with emotions) and shes super insecure cos she has like no friends and stuff and he went prom dress shopping with chrissy and saw reader there and teased her about the dress she picked and she got sad and cried at home then its prom and eddie's rejected everyone cos hes waiting for reader to show up and finally confess but shes nowhere to be found so he goes to her house with flowers or smth and he finds her crying and he comforts her and has her put her dress on and they kiss

IM SORRY IF THIS MAKES NO SENSE!!!

but thank you SO MUCH ash your writing is literally amazing it always has me in my feels <333 thank you for bringing so much happiness (and angst LMAO) to my feed!!

You are so sweet!! Thank you so much 🫶🏻I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting!

Prom Dress

Eddie never had a good hand on his emotions, he never learned how to express what he felt correctly. All he saw growing up was expressing emotions through anger. His dad was never around to tell him about girls and his mom was never there to teach him how a girl wants to be treated. So he went with what came naturally, except he barely ever felt real feelings towards a girl.

Until he met Y/N

Eddie was popular, it was easy to have girls on his arm and in his bed. But he didn't have feelings for them, so it was easy sweet talk and then they wouldn't talk again. But it was like his brain froze when he was in Y/N's presence. His sweet talk was out the door as he stuttered out something to say, and it was always a comment that sent her over the edge. He just didn't know that.

Y/N was a very alone person. She wasn't the best at making friends, making peace with being her own friend. She was insecure, never telling a boy how she felt because she knew it would go the exact way she thought it would. And when she realized her heart raced when Eddie walked in the halls, she knew that one would never happen.

Plus she has a good damn feeling he hated her guts. He added fire to the hell she lived in but there was something about him that she wanted. She allowed herself to be his punching bag because she felt alive when his eyes were on her. He was practically the only person that talked to her, and she didn't want to give that up.

Because at the end of the day, she had Eddie Munson's attention.

~~~

Eddie groaned as Chrissy picked up another dress to try on. He looked at his watch, annoyed that they had been in the same shop for two hours.

"At this point, Jason won't care what you pick. Can we please go?" Eddie moaned, his head thrown back as he sat on the uncomfortable chairs.

"You're fine. I have two more dresses and then we'll leave!" Chrissy sighed, going into the changing room.

Eddie moved his head back and looked around the store. He blinked a few times when he saw someone familiar. He stood up and slowly walked closer, squinting his eyes as a girl walked away from the register with a puffy pink dress.

"Y/N?"

She froze as she recognized the voice. Already on edge as she turned out. Panic in her eyes as she met his brown ones.

"Hi Eddie," she said, a small smile as she greeted him politely.

"Is that your prom dress?" He asked, his eyes looking over her shoulder as she held it.

"Yeah," she said quietly

"So you are going to prom? What? Alone?" He scoffed, a mocking chuckle left his mouth and Y/N shifted on her feet uncomfortably.

"Um, I don't know yet. Depends if someone asks" She shrugged

Eddie felt his body burn, a sense of discomfort thinking of someone asking her. Some guy takes her, takes pictures, and spins her on the dance floor. Someone she would have gotten dressed up for. He wasn't sure why the thought made him so damn angry. But the good news for him, he knew how to express anger.

"Ask you? You know that's not going to happen" he argued, his eyes dark as he stared down at her. "And while you are wearing that? A puffy pink dress, you think you are some fairytale princess? That dress looks like it's for a five-year-old old" He teased, but it wasn't his usual tease. This time it felt like every word he said sliced through her.

The one dress that fit her like a glove. The one dress that made every problem wash away. A dress where for once she felt beautiful.

She didn't say anything, just turned around and walked out of the store.

She cried as she raced to her car, harshly throwing the dress in the backseat. She cried the whole way home, feeling helpless in this world. She wasn't sure why it felt like everything was always up against her.

~~~

It was the night of the prom, and Y/N ignored the dress that hung up in her closet.

She bought it a week ago, a week since Eddie ruined the one bit of confidence she had left.

She wanted to return it, but the store wouldn't take it. So now she was stuck with a reminder that she would never be the gorgeous girl who walked into prom and changed everyone's perspective of her. She would still be that loser everyone laughed about.

So she stayed home. Her parents weren't too involved with her life, out on vacation as she sat on the couch. She watched romantic movies, crying as she stuffed her mouth with chocolate ice cream.

~

Eddie checked his watch for the tenth time of the night. The loud music overwhelmed him as he kept his eyes on the door.

"Want to dance?" A girl from the cheerleading squad asked.

"No thanks. I'm waiting for someone" he said with a tight smile, then moved his eyes back to the door

The prom started two hours ago, and she still wasn't there.

He turned down about ten dances before he took matters into his own hands.

He grabbed his keys from his pocket and hit the road. The flowers he bought sat in his passenger seat, guess he was going to drive them to her instead.

He pulled up to her driveway, letting out a nervous breath as he got out. He fixed his suit, patted down his hair, and gripped the flowers. He knocked on the door, stepping back as he waited for it to open.

"Eddie?" She was surprised, her body mostly covered by the door. Some sort of protection for herself.

He looked up and frowned. Her eyes were red and her cheeks were wet. And she wasn't anywhere near dressed up for prom. Her hair was down, but no makeup on her face.

"Hey, can I come in?" He asked

"Why?" She asked, covering her body even more with the door

"Why didn't you come to prom?"

She was surprised he even noticed. But she was more curious as to why it mattered to him.

"Didn't want to go. Is that all?" She snapped. It was enough that he could torture her at school and outside of school. But at her own house is where she drew the line.

"Um, uh, these are for you," he said shyly, not used to her face looking so annoyed and a snap in her tone.

She eyed the flowers as he held them out for her. She opened the door wider to grab them. They were truly beautiful and it was the first time she ever received flowers.

"Oh um thank you, Eddie," she said, smelling the flowers

"Can I come in? Maybe we can talk?" He asked, he twiddled his fingers as he waited for her to reply

"Uh sure but don't you have like a date or something?" She asked

"No, I was waiting for you," he said honestly, for once just saying what he felt instead of turning it into a joke.

She didn't know what to say so she opened the door and let him step inside.

She walked to the kitchen and got a vase for the flowers. He followed without asking.

"So why were you waiting for me? Was a big bucket of red paint gonna fall over me?" She asked, watching as the water filled the clear vase.

"No, why would I do that?" He asked, his head turned like a confused puppy

She laughed to herself bitterly

"Because you make my life hell" She looked at him like it was obvious. Softly placing the flowers on the kitchen table.

"I don't mean to, I'm sorry" his eyes looked sincere but she wasn't sure what trap he was waiting for.

"Then why do you do it?" She asked, her arms crossed as she angrily looked at him. Maybe this was her chance to finally stick up for herself and tell him to shove everything up his ass.

"Because I like you, and I wasn't sure how to show that" he explained, a small blush formed on his face as he muttered the words.

Y/N stood frozen as she stared at him like he had two heads.

Eddie confessed he liked her?

What kind of prank was this?

"Which I can see now I did in every wrong way possible. I'm sorry for everything, I didn't know I was upsetting you."

She sighed as the apology lifted some weight off her body. It felt nice to finally be apologized to.

"Thank you for apologizing," she said, a small smile on her face

"Thank you for allowing me to," he said, a shy smile on his face

They stared at each other, neither knowing what the next move should be.

"Can I uh see your dress? I saw it in the store but didn't get to see what it looked like on you" he asked, his eyes moving to the floor

"Are you going to make fun of me?" She asked, her arms crossed. Her protection shield is back up.

"No!" He shook his head dramatically, "I know my horrible take on flirting was more hurtful. So I will keep my mouth shut" he said

"That was flirting? God, you are horrible" she joked, loving the way the air shifted into something lighthearted. He laughed with her and agreed.

She led him to her room, allowing him to sit on the bed as she went into the bathroom to change.

She slipped on the pink dress, looking at herself in the mirror. That same rush of confidence filled her body. It was like the dress was magical and healed every broken part of her. She tried to reach the back zipper but couldn't get it. Her face was already on fire as she realized what she had to do.

She walked into the room, Eddie looked up from his hands and his mouth dropped. His eyes skimmed over her dress, the way it hugged her body perfectly.

"Could you zip me up?" She asked, turning around as she tried to keep her breathing normal.

He coughed and stood up. Wiping his sweaty palms on his suit pants. His fingers danced down her spine, making her shiver. He reached the zipper and slowly pulled it up, her skin disappearing under the fabric.

The room felt thick as she slowly turned around. The ghost of his fingers was still on her back.

"You look breathtaking," he said, his voice a quiet whisper as he looked into her eyes

She gulped when his eyes dropped down to her lips. Then he was slowly leaning in.

His hand moved up to hold her cheek, and his eyes moved up to her eyes to check for a sign of rejection. But her eyes were zoned in on his lips.

He smirked as he noticed, slowly leaning in until his lips pressed perfectly against hers.

She wasn't sure where to put her hands so she softly placed them on his chest. Her head turned as he deepened the kiss.

She felt like he kept chasing her lips, sucking away her breath as she gripped his suit in her fingers.

Her body buzzed with electricity. His lips and hands were softer than she thought they would be. His kiss was gentle and slow. Her stomach fluttered and her head spun.

He held back his moans as he slipped his tongue in her mouth. Her lips were soft and warm. Her hands on his chest made his heart race and his face flush. He tried his best to not get carried away, not wanting to scare her. His free hand slipped to her back as he pushed her further against him. He never felt this way ever when he kissed a girl.

She pulled back when she felt like she couldn't breathe. She took a huge puff of air into her lungs as they kept their faces close.

Panting against each other as they looked into each other's eyes.

Like she said, it was a magical dress.

Tags!

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37 @bellaisswagger @arlx @ineedmentalhelp123

[cherubfae]

Can you write Alastor x a Reader who works in radio? I don't think Alastor would let them on air since he doesn't seem the type to have a co host to me but maybe he'd have a intern who gets him coffee or a script writer.

"𝔦𝔱'𝔰 𝔤𝔬𝔬𝔡 𝔱𝔬 𝔟𝔢 𝔟𝔞𝔠𝔨 𝔬𝔫 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔞𝔦𝔯" || {𝔞𝔩𝔞𝔰𝔱𝔬𝔯}

tags: gn!sinner!reader (described to have horns but is an otherwise ambiguous demon!!), fluff, pre-established relationship, mentions of death, true crime, vox being vox lmao, jealous alastor, blood/bloody play (sorta??), Valentino is his own warning (threats of SA but nothing happens), mentions of injuries and being kidnapped (use of chloroform), implied VoxVal, no smut but still MDNI

a/n: I hope you enjoy!! This got a bit long!

Much like Alastor's life before he died, you were also quite the popular radio host for your time. Engaging, funny, and respectable. Your audience loved tuning in the early hours of the morning to you recanting the strange occurrences of the multiple killings of men from the late 1920s until that stream suddenly stopped during the year 1933 within New Orleans, Louisiana.

True crime has always been your passion, in life and in death. You certainly didn't think you'd end up in Hell for taking the life of someone trying to mug you on the street. A tall, masked man who saw to it that you'd never see the light of day again. A couple gunshot wounds to your abdomen proved effective as you rest against the wall, bleeding out onto the concrete with your soon-to-be killer lying facedown and dead mere feet from you. Killed by the very thing you sought to bring awareness towards. Quite poetic in a way.

As your gaze clouds and vision becomes unfocused, you look up at the stars. The ares around you was beautiful. It was one of your favorite parts of town, even your death wouldn't taint the beauty of the stretching oak and maple trees reaching tall towards the skies. The faint sound of smooth jazz playing from the record shop only a few paces away mixing with the swirling scent of coffee. At least you were dying in a place that you loved.

Now, here you are. In Hell. Doomed to total damnation for all fucking eternity. You'd been down here for a couple months, taking up residence near Cannibal Town, yet still unsure of what to make of all the carnage, debauchery, and depravity. You didn't think you belonged in Hell, even if you took the life that simultaneously extinguished your own.

"What's wrong, dearie? I've known you to be quiet but today you are exceptionally so." Mused Rosie, her gentle tone pulling you out of your reverie. You glanced down at your tea, sighing.

Leaning your cheek against your palm, you meet her charcoal-black eyes. Genuine concern etched onto her politely beautiful face. "I'm just feeling lost is all, I guess. I told you how I ended up in Hell, right?" Solemnly, Rosie nods.

Placing down her tea cup, Rosie wiggles towards you a bit. "Maybe you just need to find that old spark again! Something that roused you when you were alive! I have a friend who was a radio host, same as you. He may be able to have a job for you! Alastor is as charming as they come!" She grins, her mouth full of pointed teeth on full display.

Your brow quirks. "Alastor? The Radio Demon?" Rosie nods, excitedly. Alastor had been the prolific serial killer that haunted New Orleans back in the 1920s. It felt weird that the main man-- subject, you studied in life would soon be your acquaintance and potential boss in death. You'd heard many hushed tales about the aforementioned Radio Demon dealing in bartered souls and how he wreaked havoc against his fellow Overlords overnight. He definitely seemed like the kind of demon you didn't want to make light of, or worse, be on his bad side.

"He's a quirky one, for sure, but don't listen to all those rumors and gossip!" Rosie waves her hand with a laugh. "Alastor is still a gentleman and I'm sure he'd be delighted to offer you a job! Maybe you can intern for him? Besides! If he's ever rude to you, ol' Rosie will kick him in the shins! I'll wear my extra-pointy boots!" She giggles, holding your hands in hers. "You'll be in good hands, my dear! I'll let Alastor know you're coming right away!"

Staring down at the neatly folded paper in your hand, you double and triple check the address scrawled in neat calligraphy.

Hazbin Hotel.

Was it normal for a former serial killer slash radio host to become a hotelier that's trying to rehabilitate sinners?

With a shrug, you made your way up the incline taking note of the rather ominous looking radio tower jutting out from the far-right side of the hotel. A sign displaying the words on-air was currently unlit and it looked quite dark inside from what you could see from the ground. Perhaps the great Alastor wasn't at home.

Knocking on the front door, you're greeted by a tall, deer-like demon with two-toned hair and sharp yellow teeth dressed in a dapper red-pinstripe suit complete with a microphone-like cane. Scarlet eyes stare down at you like a lion watching a gazelle. You feel utterly and completely exposed, like he's peeling back your every layer, surveying you, before he even said a single word.

"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, my dear! Quite a pleasure! You must be the little darling that dear Rosie sent, yes?" Alastor places his hand on your lower back, guiding you past the hotel's front doors and into the welcoming comfort of the establishment's front lobby and reception area. "This is a place where wayward sinners such as yourself can find peace and be led on the path of redemption to ascend to Heaven by Hell's very own princess, Charlie Morningstar!"

On queue, a blonde-haired girl sprints up to you squealing and flailing her arms a bit. She takes her hands in yours and offers you a big, delighted smile. You like her immediately. "Oh, my gosh! Welcome, welcome to Hazbin Hotel! I see you've met our gracious host Alastor! He's mentioned that you're going to be interning for him-- how exciting! We are so thankful to have you!"

With the attention directed back at him, Alastor grins with a whine of radio static. It was the equivalent of a lazy smirk with his half-lidded scarlet eyes taking you in one more, searching for any potential risks you may pose though you didn't intend any of that sort. You felt your skin begin to heat the longer his gaze remained on you, and hesitantly break the eye contact with the demon in favor of Charlie, who has been excitedly talking about all of the hotel's features.

To think, all those months ago had been the start of your journey with your friends. You had felt so out of place in Hell, in your new skin, uncomfortable with the weight of sharp horns protruding your skin and the strength of your clawed hands. You were quite pleasantly surprised at what you could withstand now as a demon.

"I brought your coffee, sir." Alastor hums out a soft 'thank you' yet continues to fiddle with the buttons and tracks on his console, not raising his head to look at you. "Rosie gave me some venison for you. She said aid it's your favorite when it's fresh and raw." Placing Alastor's simple black coffee on a small side table, you revere your boss with a fond expression. Rosie had been truthful she said he was the charming sort. There certainly was an air of respectability about him that men lacked from your time.

"Our dear Rosie is certainly a clever one, and she is quite correct. There is no better way to enjoy meat than having it served fresh. Preferably off the bone but this will do." Alastor tilts his head, turning to the side to regale you from the corner of his eyes. Those damn beautiful scarlet gems. "Something the matter, my dear?" Alastor's voice is a soft crackle.

Stumbling in surprise, you wrack your brain for a plausible answer. When you find none, you shake your head from side to side cursing the heat that sets your cheeks ablaze.

Alastor smirks, standing from his stool and approaches you. He grasps your chin between his thumb and forefinger; his claw lightly dragging across your lower lip. Blood beads up following the path his claw created. He swipes it up, licking it in front of you.

"Tasty," Alastor grins, leaning down and bumping his nose into yours. "As I said, meat is best when fresh." He squeezes your cheek lightly, chuckling at the exudes into his palm. "If I wasn't certain, I'd say you have a little crush on me, hmm?" He turns his back to you, those damned scarlet eyes that see straight through your soul strike you where you stand. "That'll be all now, dearest. Thank you for your time and your blood."

You couldn't get out of there fast enough. You weren't afraid of him, no, you were more scared of kissing him now more than ever. A fantasy of both of you pressed tight to one another with mouths soaked in blood would be all you can think of for hours.

Whatever was going on between you and Alastor continued on much like a game of cat and mouse only he seemed to be going out of his way more and more to fluster you, saying things that would catch you off guard.

"I don't think of myself as much of a man who desires a relationship beyond friends and family, but cohabitating with you as lifelong partners does sound desirable."

"Hmm, tell me. Are your horns sensitive?" His breath ghosts then one day, causing you to shriek and cover them. You pout, turning your head to glare at him. Alastor's grin only seemed to stretch further. "Only teasing, darling, no need to get so uppity."

It was a slow evening, Alastor had sent you off on another errand. There was a sense of apprehension worrying his brow, glancing at the analog clock. The hour hand strikes the 3am mark. He'd sent you off almost an hour and a half ago, so where were you?

Interference crackles onto his radio, Alastor hissing as the feedback screeches. With ears pinned back, his eyes narrowed further when a familiar voice crosses.

"Ugh, I will never understand why thr fuck you use this shit, Alastor." Groaned Vox. "Anyway, I got your cute assistant here. You should see them, shaking like a leaf." The radio glitches in tune with Vox's laughter. "Valentino here has been itching for a new plaything, doesn't that sound good, sweetheart? Maybe we can broadcast that for all of Hell to see, right Al--"

Smash. Alastor's fist smashes through the radio cutting off Vox's boastful rant.

On the other side of the city, Vox blinks in confusion. "I lost the radio signal? Oh, fuck, God this shit is so old." He sighs, leaning back in his chair. Spinning around, he gives you a wry smirk. "Guess we'll see if the Great Alastor comes to rescue his lost pup, hmm?"

Glowering at him, left bound and gagged, sitting on the cold, hard floor. Valentino gives a harsh tug on your hair, your teeth sinking into the cotton gag shoved in your mouth, a muffled grunt leaving you.

An electric feeling in the air has your hair rising. Vox and Valentino share a confused look. A large fist blasts inside of the V Tower, claws sharp as they did through the metal like it was butter.

"Oh, fuck, it's Alastor!" Vox shrieks, scrambling to get away from the broken window. A second fist smashes through sending Vox into the opposing wall with a deep thud. Valentino runs to his friend's aid, helping him up.

"Well, this is what you wanted, honey."

Vox groans in protest. "I know."

Green electricity crackles, a dark shadow pooling into the room and with a shriek, manifests into Alastor.

Paying the two no mind, Alastor crosses the threshold and kneels down before you. His clawed fingers are gentle as he removes the gag around your bruised mouth. "Sorry it took me so long, mon cour." A tentacle bursts through his back, spiraling directly into Vox and Valentino, sending the two into the neighboring room with a loud crash.

Scooping you into his arms, Alastor calmly walks through to the next room, his hand cupping the back of your head. "Rest." He regards the other two males with a snarling crackle.

"If I didn't have more important matters to attend to, I would eviscerate you two gents. Touch what is mine again and I'll broadcast your fucking screams all over Hell." Alastor hums, exiting V Tower.

"Holy shit! Did you see?? He finally sees me as his rival!" Vox cheers, tossing both arms into the air in celebration.

Valentino sighs, "Honey, you need psychiatric help."

"This may sting, but I trust that you can handle it." Alastor says, rubbing off the blood from your brow with a cotton ball doused in isopropyl alcohol. Wincing softly, you take the moment to look at him closely. You'd never seen Alastor so disheveled. Even with dealing with enemies, he was always composed. But, tonight, he had been anything but the picture of composure. He looked positively feral.

"Is there something about my face you find interesting, dearest?"

Squeaking, your face flushes, shaking your arms frantically. Gasping you quickly place a hand to your ribs. Guess they really did fracture something when they knocked you out.

Alastor stills your hands with his own. "Easy now, pet. You're in no state to be moving around like an interpretive mime. I was only teasing you, my dearest. You had me worried tonight."

Hanging your head low, you turn your gaze away. "I'm sorry, Alastor. I don't know how they got the drop on me. I was walking home and smelled something odd--," you gasped in realization. "Chloroform. It had to be."

Alastor growled tensely at that. He tied the bandage around your arm and with a snap of his fingers the medical kit disappeared and a serving tray appeared carrying a kettle full of hot chocolate and a staple 1920s dessert: pound cake. This one was drizzled with a bitter chocolate and filled with strawberries.

Alastor takes your hand and gently kisses your knuckles. "Care to join me for a treat?" His tone was a touch more gentle than it had been a heartbeat ago. You smile, nodding eagerly. He grins and begins to cut the cake, serving you first. "One more thing."

Softly, Alastor kisses your cheek. It was the lightest of touches and over as soon as it happened. He busies himself by pouring two mugs of steaming hot chocolate, the apples of his cheeks were a rosy hue.

|| ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ʀᴇᴘᴏꜱᴛ, ʀᴇᴜꜱᴇ, ᴏʀ ᴇᴅɪᴛ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋꜱ ɪɴ ᴀɴʏ ᴡᴀʏ! ɪ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴘᴇʀᴍɪꜱꜱɪᴏɴ. ᴛᴜᴍʙʟʀ ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇ ᴏɴʟʏ ꜱɪᴛᴇ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ɪ ᴘᴏꜱᴛ. ᴀʟʟ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ ʙᴇʟᴏɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ʀɪɢʜᴛꜰᴜʟ ᴏᴡɴᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ ʙᴇʟᴏɴɢꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ © ᴄʜᴇʀᴜʙꜰᴀᴇ 2024 ||

[bellewintersroe]

Jenson Button x FamousReader!2009

this is like a second part (can be read individually) to THIS. Here’s just some more headcannons of what it would be like when Jenson is in a relationship with a famous British celeb who’s extremely popular, especially amongst the party scene. warnings: mentions of sex, oral sex, nothing too graphic but I just knowww Jenson gets down and dirty. mentions of alcohol and some drug use? not to glamorise it we all know celebs ain’t innocent ok. for this case 18+ 😇

Jenson is a cutie ok, the more he falls in love with his SO the more he finds himself looking out for her in the garage. Whether this be before or after his race, just imagine his head poking out of his car, or he’s fully suited, helmet still on, glimpsing around trying to find her.

lots of cuddles, he’d keep an arm slung around her, especially if they’re in public where there’s paparazzi- in that case he’s keeping an extra tight grip on her.

despises the paparazzi ok- he’s a polite man, pretty tame, but British press in the 2000s were VILE and for his girlfriend, he can’t stand the idea of them even looking at her.

helps shields her eyes when the flashes are too bright.

Taxis home together at questionable hours of the morning, limbs sprawled over each other and getting caught snogging in the backseats.

drunk sex- especially when he wins the championship, he’s so smug and proud, fucking into her with all his energy, cos he’s world champion baby 😏. lovesss seeing her legs pinned up over his shoulders.

thanks his girl publicly after he wins his championship.

as I mentioned in the part prior to this, Jenson LOVES going on holiday with her, like he’s a bit of a perv when it comes to seeing y/n in a bikini, especially after he’d already seen to many shoots of her before even meeting each other.

never admits to being a fanboy of her but the smirk would say otherwise.

getting down and dirty on a yacht, hidden by a beach towel whilst he fingers her, he has his sunnies on and he’s smirking, pressing kisses to her temple and whispering sweet nothings.

“you’re doing so good aren’t you?” “all these people taking pictures of you and nobody has a clue what we’re doing.” “should put on a show for them, shouldn’t we?”

so mf dirty, his British accent makes it 10x sexier too.

sex in the pool of a yacht, and every single room in there, wants to try everything with her, but he isn’t pushy in the slightest- Jenson wouldn’t ever come close to making her feel uncomfortable.

They’d deffo see pictures released of them both the next day and giggle because nobody would have a clue what was happening under that towel.

can be really soft in sex, like stroking her face, talking her thru it -omfg I need him.

Deffo wants to try like anal, and certain kinks- I feel like she would too, idk when they’re both drunk they’d decide they wanna try something and sometimes it’s an utter fail.

other times it’s just giggly, exciting sex where they’re both eating fucking whipped cream off one another or something.

soft, gentle moans from him, especially when the sex is more passionate, when it’s rougher I feel like he’d be quiet but let out some grunts whenever he’s out of breath or gets really into it.

He’s a sucker when she goes down on him, like he’s a mess omg- if there’s one way to elicit moans from him that’s exactly how and she’s soooo good at it- he makes plenty of public innuendos about this.

I feel like y/n would wear the smallest little mini skirts, like she’s a Y2K queen and befriends lots of other wags at this stage- constantly pictures walking around the paddock looking cool asf.

Deffo a trend setter, but they’re the type of couple in 15 years that the younger generation look at and go ‘they’re together?!?’

as they get older they deffo become more private, but not secretive.

can spot each other in a crowd instantly, when he wins a race you best expect him to practically JUMP onto her, sometimes he forgets he’s bigger than her lmao.

The cameras go CRAZY for this and their faces are printed all over the newspapers.

Quiet, lazy mornings in England, especially when it’s cold out and Jenson finally has time off- the two of them can really appreciate the quiet side of life at home.

makes him want to settle down- but I think he’d be worried at first about bringing a child into the world- they’re having too much fun with each other, but I think they would calm down after a few years.

occasional bickers, maybe they both walk out of a nightclub and she’s storming ahead of him with a face like a slapped arse. Jenson would make a comment and y/n would be pissed that all the onlookers heard.

Y/n and Jenson’s relationship on the rocks?!

bitch the next morning he’s on top of her having the best make up sex ever.

Seriously their stamina is insane so they fuck like rabbits.

I feel like because y/n maybe has grown up in the public eye? Or fame came in her teens, her behaviour can be fairly erratic at times- like especially before Jenson the partying and boozing was out of control, but being a few years older he really settles her down in life.

like not that she’s troubled (I’m not gonna glamorise it but it’s real life) but it can’t be easy dealing with everything and fame at a young age, I feel like Jenson would take care of her at times, like if she gets wayyyy to drunk he wouldn’t lecture her, but he’d deffo have this sad look on his face, clearly he’s worried.

she’s ok tho, especially with him and like I said she settles down and matures a lot with Jenson.

She’d probs smoke weed every now and then and idk if Jenson would like it, especially when he’s so focused on racing, but he tries it once or twice and would probs just fall asleep immediately.

I feel like he’s so cuddly at times, like in the middle of the night he’d just snuggle up to her. So cute. On holiday on sunbeds he’d be so cuddly, grabbing at her and it causes for some really cute paparazzi pictures.

not to glamorise droogz and drinking but them two probably party a lot in the first year together.

Jenson is the type to eye his gf up from the other side of the room, nods her over or something sexy.

hand would start on your shoulder and end up on her ass- so many headlines the next day…

But yeah they’re such a popular, attractive couple, you either want to be with them or want to be them.

[pretty-little-mind33]

Tom Ryder x fem!reader

Summary: You're Tom's makeup artist for a movie he's shooting and you absolutely hate him. However, one round of karaoke later, your feelings temporarily shift.

Genre: Fluff, smidge of angst, Enemies to Lovers (very one-sided lmao)

Warnings: Tom is a stupid asshole (but he's also just a mess), swearing, reader is described as shorter than Tom, light misogyny, slapping, alcohol, being drunk/high.

TOM RYDER MASTERLIST

The bar is dimly lit and the loud music resounds in your ear as your knee bounces. You stir the straw around your drink, sighing as you turn to Vanessa, your co-worker. "He left me another post-it note on the desk yesterday telling me he wants a new lip oil because his now tastes weird!? His last one is only from last week and it's the same brand he always uses! I'm so sick of his bullshit, V," you drop your head in your arms and then peek up at Vanessa again, "He's such a dick."

Vanessa laughs, sipping on her margarita, as she shrugs, "Didn't you know that when you took the job, honey?"

"I mean, sure. But those could have been rumors," you pout and sit up, moving some hair behind your ear as you look around the room, where other crew members have gathered around the karaoke machine.

"Listen, don't think about Tom Ryder. You're off the clock and everyone knows he's a world-class asshole—a pretty world-class asshole, I will let him have that," Vanessa hums and also turns her attention to the rest of your friends and co-workers as she claps her hands. 

You look down at your drink, your cheeks feeling warmer than usual. Not thinking about Tom Ryder was easier said than done when you had to work on his face 5 days a week. He was so infuriating most times, either talking down to you when you worked or wouldn't cooperate with anything you told him to do because he was on his phone. Sometimes he really makes you want to stab the mascara stick into his eye. 

Still, you can't deny he's extremely handsome and that just annoys you more. 

Suddenly, you hear a bunch of cheers and hoots from outside, directly accompanied by the sound of the door slamming open. When you hear an all too familiar voice, your eyes widen and you snap around to make sure you hadn't just imagined it. 

Tom Ryder coming to one of the crew parties? No fucking way. Obviously, he's always invited to them but in a very arrogant fashion he never shows up—which is one of the reasons you do, because he never does. 

Only this time he did and he's not alone. 

Tom is dressed in another one of his boisterous outfits, his shirt loosely unbuttoned to reveal his chest and a peak of his toned abs. Pink-tinted sunglasses sit on his nose and his dirty blond hair curls messily around his face.

He looks drunk, or high, when he walks in and you can't tell which one it is because he's constantly moving and laughing. He's accompanied by a few other low A-list actor friends he has and a pretty blond model hangs on his arm, her giggles instantly infuriating you. 

How can she stand to be near him for more than a minute? Even less hold his arm and be his eye-candy? 

You turn back around, desperately attempting to calm the bile rising in your throat. God, you hate him. You feel even worse when he leans beside you at the bar and orders a drink from the bartender, snapping his fingers as he does. He doesn't even address your presence beside him and your blood boils. 

Your anger immediately turns to disgust when you hear the man hosting the karaoke scream out Tom Ryder's name.

"Tom Ryder everyone! I loved your new movie, man, it was awesome! How about a song?" the man asks, eyebrows wiggling as the crew clap (mostly out of politeness) and his friends make loud, drunken noises like a bunch of animals. 

"C'mon! One song—for all the pretty ladies in the crowd!"

Tom seems intrigued when the man mentions the girls. You roll your eyes and your hand tightens around your glass as he walks up to the host, raising his hands in surrender and feigning humbleness. "Alright, alright, I have to give the ladies what they want, don't I?" Tom boasts, winking at one of the camera girls he never looks at otherwise. 

Someone put you out of your misery now.

The host seems ecstatic to have someone this famous next to him and asks Tom for a quick photo, which Tom obviously doesn't turn down. You pretend to gag when Vanessa turns to look at you and smirks at Tom's behavior.. 

"How about a duet, Ryder?" The host asks as he hands him the mic. 

"Nah, I usually sing solo," Tom says, his words slightly slurred, and then he leans in to whisper something in the host's ear—which probably goes something like, "Unless she's got a nice rack, then by all means invite her up here." 

You lean in and whisper into Vanessa's ear, "Ten bucks he takes home the girl he ends up singing with," you say with a frown, your voice a little strained. Vanessa laughs and then the worst thing happens.

"You," the host shouts and you look up alarmed. Your eyes are wide when you realize everyone, including Tom, is staring at you. "The angry-looking girl in the back. Why don't you come up and join him? I doubt he'd bite." 

Laughter, including some nervous ones from your friends, resounds around the room as Tom's smirk widens. You'd be surprised, you think. You find your voice again and say, "Um, can't you ask one of them?" you point to the group of eager fangirls swarming around the small stage as they ogle Tom. 

"C'mon, sweetheart," Tom slurs, squinting at you, "One song won't kill you." 

But you might just kill him.

Vanessa, the traitor, nudges you again and you stumble from the stool. You glare at her but when all your friends, including Tom's more obnoxious friends, chant encouragements you feel completely trapped. 

The walk to the small stage feels eerily similar to a walk of shame as you look to your co-workers in hopes someone will save you. No one does and you ignore the stares from all the girls who wish they could take your place. 

You're blinded by the lights as you step on the stage and approach the host. "Atta girl," the man smirks patronizingly as he hands you the second mic. You scrunch your nose at him and then look up at Tom, expecting him to be ignoring you like he usually is, but instead, he's staring. 

His cheeks are pink from being intoxicated and he tilts his head, watching you clutch the mic nervously. 

The host doesn't warn you when the song begins to play and he walks away. You realize too late you and Tom are now alone and everyone is watching you as dread slowly fills your stomach. 

You don't even know how to sing! This is so humiliating. 

 The familiar melody of, "Don't Go Breaking My Heart," fills the air and you feel the heat rise in your chest and up to your ears. Your heart is pounding so loudly you can only faintly hear Tom start to sing the song. He sounds fairly good and you aren't surprised considering he's an actor. 

Your voice catches in your throat and you feel tears rise. You don't sing when it's your turn and the crowd is silent. 

Suddenly, you jump when you feel a strong hand on your hip and you snap your head around to look at him. Your hand finds Tom's hand immediately, gripping it, and just as you're about to pull it away, he leans in and whispers, hot against your ear, "Baby doll, you're making me look bad," he states, his tone as condescending as it always is, and your heart does a somersault in your chest.

He looks down at you this time, his blue eyes lock with yours for a moment and his hand falters on your hip. For an actor, Tom Ryder has surprisingly no poker face because when he sees your distressed state, his demeanor shifts, and instead of frustration, he takes on a different approach.   

He takes your hand, suddenly twirling you around and you make a small sound as you stumble. It's been a few seconds since anyone has sung the song, so he sings again and this time, his eyes stay on yours as he sings your lyrics.

"You know this," he mouths, encouraging you as he does this weird, clearly drunk-induced shimmy that makes you laugh despite your better judgment. He points to the small screen where the lyrics are displayed.

You take a breath and then sing, focusing on him instead of the crowd and your head feels light. You would have never guessed there would be a day when you'd find comfort in Tom Ryder. Your friends clap with amusement and laughter swirls around the bar as you both continue to sing and dance. 

Occasionally, Tom will pull you in closer but you'll move away, flustered, and when the song finally ends, you move back and almost trip on the mic's cord. 

With a gasp, you expect to fall flat on your ass but instead, Tom wraps his arm around your waist and pulls you into him as your palms press on his chest. You're breathing heavily and so is he, his hand is still on your back as his eyes roam over all your features until you push him away and walk down the small stairs and back to the ground where all your friends are whispering and clapping. 

You feel like you can't breathe, your heart beating so quickly. You mumble a quick "excuse me" to Vanessa, snatch your purse from the bar counter, and open the door to outside. The cool air calms your burning skin and you lean against the building. 

What the fuck was that? Why was he looking at you like that? 

"You know, it's normal to be nervous around someone like me," Tom's voice interrupts your panic and you spin around, not expecting to see him. "But running from me? Now, darling, that's truly a first," he finishes with a chuckle and an obnoxious smirk. 

"You're so full of yourself," you whisper automatically but then your eyes round as if you've realized what you'd said. 

Tom looks surprised but he also remains cool as he strokes a hand down his jaw and puts it on his hip. "Mm, I assume you're not a fan then." 

You cross your arms and look anywhere but directly at him because fuck, why did someone so incredibly stupid and pretentious have to be so darn hot? "You could say that, sure," you shrug. "Not everyone likes you, Tom Ryder." You shut yourself up as soon as the words leave your mouth. This isn't exactly something you should say to someone who you work with.

However, Tom's expression sours and he lifts his eyebrow. "You don't like me?"

You turn to him, eyes locking with him this time. "That isn't what I said."

Tom's eyebrows crease and he squints at you, removing his stupid sunglasses and they push back his blond hair. "You're confusing me." He sounds genuine. 

You can't help but chuckle at his idiocy and surprisingly for you, your laughter makes him smile. He leans in and you lean away, eyes round when you realize how close he's becoming. "You have such a sexy laugh," he says cockily, "Bet I can make you do it again."

You hate to admit this but your heart does flutter at his words. Can anyone really blame you? It's Tom. Fucking. Ryder. You try to remind yourself how much of a dick he is—and always has been—but as you look into the blue of his eyes, his reassuring touch burns imprints on your skin and you feel dizzy. 

Shit. 

"You look familiar," Tom straightens himself, "Have I seen you somewhere? You been in any magazines? You certainly have the look."

You ignore the so-called complement and stare at him. He has to be kidding. You've been doing his makeup for over six months now and he supposedly sees you almost every day. You worked on his face every single day—how could he not recognize you? You open your mouth to ask if this is a joke but he interrupts you.

"Seriously, I must know you from somewhere. Gimme a hint, baby,"

Your stomach sinks and you feel so so stupid. Tom doesn't sense your shift as he's still focused on whatever fleeting emotion may have been between you before as his hand finds your hip. 

Instantly, your palm connects with his cheek, and the sound cracks into the air. "Don't touch me," you say harshly, ignoring how shaky your voice is.

Tom looks at you, his hand over his bruised cheek, "You hit me?!" he says in disbelief, "What the fu—" 

You don't stick around to hear his whining as you turn around and run from him. 

Again. 

"Hey–wait!" you hear Tom's shout but why would you turn around now? Tears of frustration brim your eyes as you hastily walk down the empty sidewalk.

There is no way you're fucking crying over Tom fucking Ryder right now, you tell yourself and pinch the inside of your eyes. 

No way. 

You ignore Vanessa's incessant calling and her worried texts when you arrive at your apartment. You scream in frustration, throwing your heels across the room and scaring your poor cat, Pumpkin, as she sprints into the living room, her claws against the floorboards.

Quickly, you follow her and scoop her into your arms, "'M sorry, baby," you coo and nuzzle your nose into her fur. "I'm sorry Mommy scared you."

You hear Vanessa's fifth call from your purse but you're too exhausted to deal with her and the fallout from what had happened tonight, so instead you sit on the couch and cuddle with Pumpkin, scratching behind her ears. 

* * * 

When you pull into the parking lot of the new set the next morning, you haven't slept well and you feel like shit—it doesn't help that they're filming outside today, in the summer heat, and grainy sand infiltrates into your Converse. 

You groan as you walk over to the makeup trailer and see Vanessa waiting for you. You almost called in sick this morning until you realized how guilty that would make you look, so you sucked it up. 

"Y/n?!" Vanessa shrieks and pulls you behind the trailer. "Where have you been?! I've called you a hundred times, why haven't you answered any of them? I was worried Ryder somehow took you home and that I'd lost 10 bucks—" 

"Gross, why would you think that?" you say with disgust as if you weren't surprised to hear that after you left Tom hadn't returned to the bar. 

"I mean, for one, Ryder was missing and no one knew where he went. And second, are you shitting me? Girl, the tension was more than palpable! You were practically dry-humping Tom Ryder in front of everyone!" 

You feel like someone has just punched you in the stomach and your voice comes out high and nervous when you exclaim, "I was not! It wasn't like that, V! Is that what everyone thinks?" Vanessa nods as an answer and you want to scream. 

"I swear, I- nothing happened—even outside—I- funny story I slapped him because he's a jerk and I- I don't like him!" you ramble and your heart thumps quicker when Vanessa looks behind you and her mouth curls into a devious smirk.

"Don't look now, sweetie, but your boyfriend just arrived," she pauses and checks her watch, "An hour late. As usual." Vanessa looks you dead in the eyes and then she teases, "Chop chop, time to put makeup on your man." 

Your eyes widen and you pull Vanessa further behind the trailer so Tom won't see you or her. You hold her shoulders. "Please switch with me for today. He won't even notice the difference, and Allie doesn't need to have her makeup done until noon so that way I don't have to see him! Please, V, I'll do anything!" 

Vanessa crosses her arms, "Nothing happened with him, hm?"

You look at her, your eyes round and pleading, "Please."

"Fine, but you're paying for my lunch later," she says and taps your nose, "and giving me a detailed rundown on what happened with Ryder."

You nod reluctantly, whispering a small thank you under your breath as she turns to walk into the makeup trailer behind Tom. You let out a breath, leaning against the trailer. You know you'll have to face him at some point—just not now.

The day drags on and on as the heat is becoming almost unbearable. You stand to the side, your makeup kit secured to your hip as you watch the scene from under a tent. It's another action sequence and it's very obvious Tom's makeup is fading from the warmth and his sweat. 

Shit, you realize, he needs a touch-up. Vanessa didn't use the correct primer. 

You look around, hoping to see Vanessa and tell her Ryder needs a touch but the director's voice cuts in and you tense, "Cut! Someone come to fix his face!" Jody turns to you, her eyes kind as her voice becomes a little less stressed when she sees you're prepared for this, "Can you fix his makeup?" 

Shit, shit, shit. 

This is your job, you can't say no so you walk out onto the set where Tom is leaning against a prop rock. He straightens himself and when he turns, he doesn't have the chance to process your presence as you guide him down and fumble with your kit. 

He's taller than you so he's leaning down so you can fix him up properly. You put your hand on his jaw, near his ear, to steady him as you touch up under his eyes and near his cheekbones. 

He's staring at you and you know he recognizes you this time, his blue eyes wide and puppy-like. 

Silently, you add some powder on his cheeks and nose so the product sticks better this time and when you let him go, Tom opens his mouth to speak, but you shake your head no, and then you turn your head and hurry back behind the camera. 

Your ears are burning from embarrassment as you walk directly to the makeup trailer, without looking back at anyone. 

You've barely closed the door when it slams open and you scream. You spin around just as someone tries to hold onto your arm and on instinct you grab the hairspray that's in your kit and spray it directly into… Tom's eyes. 

He screams too, his voice high-pitched and very un-sexy, as he clutches his eyes. Seeing him only causes you to scream again. "Ryder?!" you exclaim and immediately take his arm, pulling him inside the trailer as he wails like a child and rubs at his eyes. 

You slap his hands away and push him down under the faucet, pouring water into his eyes and in the process drenching his blond hair and ruining his mascara. 

"Fuck," he groans as he sputters out water as he jerks away from you. You move closer to him and without thinking hold both of his cheeks in your hands, looking directly into his, now slightly irritated, eyes. 

"Does it hurt?" you whisper, clearly concerned. 

Tom rests his hands on yours and pulls them away, "What do you think?" he groans and blinks a few times. "You're the girl—" he mutters and pinches his nose, "at karaoke. I remember you now."

You realize how close you are to him now and, overwhelmed, you step back. "Lucky me," you mumble sarcastically and take his arm, pulling him to one of the seats. "I have to fix your face again or someone is gonna fire me." 

He's weirdly docile as he looks at your work as you dry his hair. Once you're done, he speaks up, "Why'd you run from me? I mean, c'mon, the way you looked at me with those fuck-me eyes—" 

Tom has no shame and of course, he wouldn't. He's probably never really been rejected in his entire life and women have most likely let him speak to them like this. You pause and pull his chin harder so he's looking at you as you continue with his mascara. 

"Tell me honestly Ryder, do you even hear yourself when you speak?" you ask, your voice strained. 

"What?" Tom asks, sounding genuinely confused. 

"You're an asshole. That's why I ran from you." You drop his chin and your word vomit comes out without you being able to help it as you cross your arms, "I mean—I have been doing your makeup for months! And you've only ever left me your stupid post-it notes when you have a demand! No "Hi," "Good morning," "How are you?" No. Nothing like that. And I tried! I really tried in the beginning because like everyone else on this fucked up planet I thought you were awesome."

Tom opens his mouth to make a snide comment but you instantly press your finger to his lips. 

"I really thought, "I'm so lucky to be Tom Ryder's makeup artist!" and then I found out Tom Ryder is a shit person that doesn't—"  

"I'm not a shit person," Tom deadpans and stares at you as if your words have hurt him. 

You tilt your head and drop your arms to your side. You don't even know what to say to him anymore. 

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry I made you feel shitty, okay?" Tom defends and his cheeks are pink, "I just—I am really bad with faces—and I-I was completely shit-faced and high on–" 

He pauses, stands, and wraps his hand around your jaw, his thumb stroking your bare cheek as your eyes widen and you tense. Something about his charm makes it impossible for you to move and because his touch is gentle, you aren't too worried. For now. "'M sorry. I am. Can't we call it even since you hit me and sprayed me in the face with whatever that fucking was?!"

He continues, "—listen, I liked karaoke with you and I was shit-faced so I know I must have been a dick."

"You're always a dick, Ryder," you comment, your tone less mad than earlier.   

"Then, you don't know me very well," Tom shrugs, "or like at all." 

"So—you're saying all this dick-ishness is a persona?" You sound very skeptical and Tom just shrugs as his thumb strokes over your skin once more and then he drops his hand, putting some distance between you and him. 

"No. Not entirely. But, you know, that doesn't mean I'm incapable of genuine feelings, Y/n."

You're surprised when you hear your name fall from his lips. Tom sees your expression and another one of his smirks curls at his lips, "As I said, I remember you now. Always did—my hot makeup artist—ask anyone—ask Gail, I mention you a lot. I was just hammered, you know? High out my mind—and it heightened all my fucking senses that I couldn't get your laugh out my head for hours." 

"If you're joking," you say and glare at him, "it isn't funny." 

Tom puts a hand on his heart dramatically, "'M not. Scouts fucking honor." 

You look at him and for once, you can't read him. "Well, either way, that doesn't change how much of an asshole you've been to me. You never said "hi" but you told Gail about me? Sorry, but that doesn't impress me."

You walk up to him and tilt his head using his chin, examining his make-up once more, and then you take his arm and try to pull him out of the trailer, "Now, c'mon, you have a job to do—go do it," you hiss.

"But—" 

"No," you start but he won't move. He turns around and stares at you. Fuck, he's strong. "Why won't you leave?" you ask, breathless as you step away from him. 

"Do you hate me so much that you won't even consider that I genuinely find you interesting?" he asks with a hint of insecurity in his voice again. "That I liked spending time with you and I think you're pretty."  

Your chest tightens and you sigh, "I- I don't know," you admit and you look up at him. You can't deny that your feelings have shifted and a little voice in your head screams that this is a trap and he'll eventually break your heart. 

"Here," Tom fumbles with the pants of his costume and pulls out a pen and a post-it note. 

"You seriously just carry those on you?" you crack a smile, finding that weirdly endearing. 

Idiot. 

"Yeah," Tom says like it's the most normal thing ever and then he writes down something on the paper. When he hands it to you it's the name of a restaurant. You frown, it's your favorite restaurant. He'd written a time beside the name. 

"How do you know this is my favorite restaurant?" you ask. 

Tom looks up, his smirk turning into a smile. "I didn't—it's mine."

Your frown deepens, "Hm, I didn't take you for a low-priced family-run Chinese restaurant kinda guy—don't you have a personal chef or something," you say and look at the time he's written down, "What is this anyway?" 

Tom shrugs and adjusts his hair. "I do but I like this place. The family who owns it never tells anyone I've been there, it gives me some privacy," he sounds serious and he walks closer to you, "Don't tell anyone, it might ruin my reputation and then your favorite restaurant might be swarmed by a bunch of fangirls," he smirks, pleased with himself. 

You can't help but chuckle. 

"And this," he points to the time, "is where I'll be tomorrow evening if you'd like to join me," he says nonchalantly and then opens the trailer door. Just as he does, he takes his phone and takes a picture of the time so he remembers it and he sends you a wink. "I won't wait long but if you do come, it's on me." 

You stare at the paper and realize Tom Ryder has just asked you on a date. You look up but he's gone and your heart does about ten thousand summersaults as your brain screams in agony. Your cheeks feel warm as you fold the paper up and put it in the pocket of your jeans. 

You're so very screwed.

You hear a ding and then a text from Vanessa saying, "Ryder's mic was on—crew heard absolutely everything—we didn't wanna interrupt your moment," she adds a mocking winking emoji but you don't care. 

That's the least of your worries now that you have a date with Tom Ryder.

[wabatle]

☆~Pjsk boys getting jealous when someone flirted with you

(wa)batle nonsense:

i just combined these two to make it easier on me ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

warnings: very small mention of pepper spray, fem reader (i don't think theres anything else i am very bad at adding warnings)

☆~Akito Shinonome

Akito would get very mad

He’d become very possessive, but then apologize for it later

He would put his hand around your waist and pull you closer to him to get his point across without even speaking

Akito would then tell the person about your relationship in a oddly threatening way

“I know what you’re trying to do. Back off. This is my girlfriend.”

If the person does not stop, you’ll just leave

He’ll tug your hand to walk away

If the person follows, remember how he punched Toya that one time?

Yeah, that’s what’s gonna happen.

violence is never the answer unless you’re akito

☆~Rui Kamishiro

Does not waste any time whatsoever

He puts his arm around you and pulls your head onto his chest

Rui would then smile in his Rui way and tell the person about your relationship

“Excuse me, this is my girlfriend you’re trying to seduce, and I’d prefer it if you left her alone.”

If the person doesn’t stop, he’s grabbing your hand and you’re running away

bye rude person

☆~Tsukasa Tenma

He gets mad in his Tsukasa way

Would 100% call you his co-star or the star of his life just to make the person know how much he loves you

“Hey! This is my co-star and she’s very tired from performing, so go away and let my star relax!!”

He’s still saying that even if you don’t perform with him

If the person doesn’t stop, he’s gonna yell

“WE’RE GONNA BE LATE, BETTER RUN!”

and off you go

on a separate note tsukasa is someone i cannot describe with words his reactions are so silly i love him sm

☆~Toya Aoyagi

The most respectful one out of everyone there

He’s staying polite no matter what happens

“Please leave my girlfriend alone. Excuse us.”

If the person doesn’t stop he’s probably about to threaten to call the cops or once again be polite and ask them to leave

why is he so polite omg

BONUS☆!

☆~KAITO

you can pick what kaito it is but it’s probably not niigo

edit: idek what im writing anymore is it even from pjsk or is it just kaito; the one that exists somewhere out there

Just laughs and wraps his arm around you

He’ll be polite but threatening too, a bit like Rui

But then he’ll actually threaten them if it gets that bad

“Excuse me, but in what place do you have a right to flirt with my girlfriend? Back off or else, haha!☆”

If they don’t stop he’s about to pull out a fake can of pepper spray to scare them off LMAO

help what kaito is this supposed to be is this even kaito help (ohedo julia night???)

[youremyheaven]

The Curse of Limitless Expansion: Jupiter's Shadow

I have covered the "negative" manifestations or the shadow side (as I prefer to call it) of different planetary influences, such as Venus, Moon, Rahu & Ketu and whilst I have explored Jupiter's different manifestations before, I thought it is time to do a more in-depth analysis of Jupiter's shadow.

Being the largest planet in our solar system, Jupiter is expansive and its natives are internally spacious and vast. I had observed previously that Jupiter is similar to Rahu in terms of its spaciousness (Claire had also observed the similarities between Punarvasu & Swati) but the difference is that Rahu is truly limitless in its expansive ability as it quite literally does not have physical form (Rahu refers to the north node of the Moon) Jupiter may be vast but it does have limits, it's bound by its massive capacity but since it does have a physical form, that means it also has limitations, it has a tipping point. This is why Jupiterean natives suffer or have the ability to realize they have "gone too far". Rahuvians have a "point of no return" mentality, they think they've gone too far but have to keep going since it no longer makes sense to return now.

Some people believe that since Jupiter is the planet of luck, abundance, growth and healing (or generally perceived as a "positive" planet) it somehow does not have a "dark side". This is untrue. Jupiter's darkness is just as terrifying as that of any other planet. The bigger the planet, the bigger the shadow.

Jupiter's shadow manifests as a god complex, messiah complex and megalomania, most commonly seen in men.

Men and women channel their nakshatras and planetary influence differently. Men tend to externalise their problems and women tend to internalise theirs. Men tend to inflict destruction upon others and women tend to self-destruct (@lasirenesensible tysm for pointing this out to me, it's a very valuable insight).

The scope of this post includes a few women but I'll discuss how Jupiter's shadow manifests in women on a separate post in the future.

It shouldn't come as a surprise that a planet known as the "Guru" or teacher is prone to making a lot of people under its influence proclaim themselves as Messiahs or divine teachers, many famous pseudo-spiritual "gurus" have Jupiter ruled naks in their big 3. They are merely charlatans with a Messiah complex driven by their ego to expand beyond reach. This is a toxic trait of Jupiter natives.

Ryuho Okawa- Punarvasu Sun, Purvabhadrapada Mars atmakaraka

He was a Japanese religious and political leader who was the CEO and founder of the Happy Science and the Happiness Realization Party. His organization has been widely criticised as a cult. Adherents of the religion worship Okawa, who claimed to be the current incarnation of a god called “El Cantare" and a number of other beings, including Hermes and Gautama Buddha.

L Ron Hubbard, Purvabhadrapada Sun conjunct Mercury and Jupiter conjunct Ketu in Vishaka (he also had Magha Moon)

He is the founder of Scientology lmao and basically co-opted a lot of eastern oriental thought mixed it with his malignant narcissism and created a religion based on spiritual hogwash. One of its most famous recruits is Tom Cruise, Punarvasu Moon

Jim Jones- Punarvasu Sun & Mercury (he was also Shatabhisha Moon)

He is known for being the (cult) leader of the Peoples Temple religious group and for the Jonestown Massacre, when he led the mass murder-suicide of more than 900 members of the group at their commune in Jonestown, Guyana, on November 18, 1978.

fun fact: Suga from BTS (Purvabhadrapada Sun conjunct Mercury) sampled a bit from a sermon given by Jim Jones for the track "what do you think" from his mixtape D-2, he removed it following the controversy

"… though you are dead, yet you shall live, and he that liveth and believeth shall never die."— Jim Jones

I feel like it is way too specific and niche for him to not have intended to put it there or have known who Jim Jones was lol but I digress

But on that note, this whole self-belief thing (as we see from Jim Jones' quote) also seems to be tied to Jupiter's nature. These natives have insane self belief.

Will Smith, Vishaka Moon is kind of an early proponent of manifestation. He's been talking about it since the early 90s.

Jim Carrey, Vishaka Rising is another celebrity who has been talking about manifestation since the 90s.

Arnold Schwarzenegger, Punarvasu Rising (and stellium)

He has talked about the power of the mind and visualisation A LOT. The key to achieving anything in life is to believe you can do it but many experiences (including trauma, self doubt etc) makes it hard for many people to persist in their belief, they hold themselves back. Jupiter's strength lies in its ability to be so vast and bold in its belief, their spaciousness means no matter what they've been through, they just know there's a way through, that they will make it out. This is their inherent nature.

Nikola Tesla, Punarvasu Sun developed the 3 6 9 method of manifestation (as @brundlefly3333 pointed out)

Kanye West, Purvabhadrapada Moon is another celebrity who has spoken about the Law, the power of self-belief etc etc a LOT.

It goes to show how easy it is for self-belief to turn into delusions of grandeur and make someone a narcissist. It is truly dangerous because Jupiter's influence on the masses is immense so whatever a Jupiter native may proclaim, they have the ability to affect many people through it. Some of the men I mentioned above convinced others that they were God and even made them kill themselves for it. This is a scary, dangerous manifestation of Jupiter's "guru" nature wielding vast influence on others and being absolutely convinced of one's righteousness

anywayssss

Mussolini- Vishaka Rising, Jupiter in Punarvasu amatyakaraka (he was also a Rohini Moon and Pushya Sun👀)

Benito Mussolini is like the OG dictator. He created fascism, a movement that would plunge most of Europe into darkness. From undermining judges to indoctrinating children, he pioneered key tactics that other dictators would use to seize power.

I specify Nodal influence in these individuals because I think the limitlessness and expansiveness of Nodal influence wrecks havoc to the already expansive nature of Jupiter and makes these natives more reckless.

I also specify Moon influence because as I already discussed in my posts, Moon influence can easily morph into cruelty and corruption and I think Moon & Jupiter together can be a dangerous combo if the native is imbalanced.

If you take anything away from these posts it would be that literally anybody with any placement/nak/planet is capable of being truly evil. There is no specific nak/planet that is a "guarantee" against evil. It truly comes down to the individual to choose how they want to live (I believe in free will and I do not condone in using astrology in a fatalistic way at all).

Ferdinand Marcos- Punarvasu Moon (he also has Ardra ascendant conjunct Ketu and a lot of Moon influence)

Ferdinand Marcos developed a cult of personality as a way of remaining President of the Philippines for 20 years, in a way that political scientists have compared to other authoritarian and totalitarian leaders such as Joseph Stalin and Adolf Hitler, but also to more contemporary dictators such as Suharto in Indonesia, Saddam Hussein in Iraq, and the Kim dynasty of North Korea.

The propaganda techniques used, either by himself or by others, to mythologize Ferdinand Marcos, began with local political machinations in Ilocos Norte while Ferdinand was still the young son of politician and Japanese collaborator Mariano Marcos, and persist today in the efforts to revise the way Marcos is portrayed in Philippine history. According to members of his administration, such as Adrian Cristobal, Marcos's intent was to project an image of himself "the only patron, the king" of Philippine society, which he still saw as a society of tribes." Cristobal furthers that "Marcos and the First Lady wanted more than anything else [...] to be king and queen. They wished to shape the kingdom in their own image; [...] Marcos wanted to be able to say, 'L'État, c'est moi.'" ("the state, that is me") In some extreme cases where Marcos encouraged the formation of cults so that they could serve as a political weapon, Marcos came to be thought of as a God.

Sun Myung Moon- Mercury conjunct Rising in Purvabhadrapada (he also has Shatabhisha Sun)

He was the founder and leader of the Unification Church established in Seoul, South Korea, who considered himself the Second Coming of Christ, but not Jesus himself. It is generally believed by Unification Church members ("Moonies") that he was the Messiah and the Second Coming of Christ and was anointed to fulfil Jesus' unfinished mission.

The thing about all these men claiming to be God/Messiahs is that there were people who believed them and followed them blindly and uncritically. Anybody can claim these things but not everybody can acquire power and influence and lead people this way. This is another aspect of Jupiter (not to repeat myself again and again but yeah it's the whole "Guru" thing, people look at you as a figure of knowledge and wisdom, and these people project natural leadership qualities).

You can't just be crazy or narcissistic enough to believe these things, you also have to be strategic enough to amass a following. To be a leader and a guru requires a certain commitment and discipline. These are all Jupiterean qualities (that are used for malicious purposes here).

Augusto Pinochet- Punarvasu Moon conjunct Saturn, Mercury in Vishaka atmakaraka, Jupiter in Purva bhadrapada amatyakaraka

He was a dictator who ruled Chile and claimed he was a visionary who was "guided by the mysterious hand of God". He had a cult of personality surrounding him

After his rise to power, Pinochet persecuted leftists, socialists, and political critics, resulting in the executions of 1,200 to 3,200 people, the internment of as many as 80,000 people, and the torture of tens of thousands. According to the Chilean government, the number of executions and forced disappearances was at least 3,095. Operation Condor, a U.S.-supported terror operation focusing on South America, was founded at the behest of the Pinochet regime in late November 1975, his 60th birthday.

Jupiter's expansive nature manifests as greed when an individual is imbalanced or spiritually stunted. This drives a need to acquire massive wealth or spread their influence/reign/territories. If the individual is spiritually evolved, their focus will be to balance the spaciousness within and not project it outward in continuous expansion.

Hafez el Assad- Mars in Punarvasu atmakaraka, Jupiter in Punarvasu amatyakaraka and Venus in Vishaka (he also had Hasta Sun)

Syria's Hafez al-Assad, a Ba'athist officer who seized power through a coup d'état in 1970, established a pervasive cult of personality to maintain his dictatorship. As soon as he took over power, Ba'ath party loyalists designated him as "Al-Abad"; an Arabic terminology with deep religious dimensions. Linguistically, ''Al-Abad'' means "forever, infinite and immortality" and religious clerics use this term in relation to Divine Attributes. By designating Assad as "Al-Abad", Syrian Ba'ath Movement ideologically elevated Hafez al-Assad as its "Immortal", "god-like figure" who is supposed to represent the state as well as the Syrian nation itself. Another meaning of Al-Abad is "permanent", which is used in state propaganda to denote the perpetual status quo of an "eternal political order" created by Hafez al-Assad, who continues to live in Assadist ideology. The term's verbal form "Abada" means "to commit genocide" including the "symbolical; performative side of violence". This dimension has been weaponized by the Assad regime to monopolize violence against alleged dissidents and justify state terrorism, including genocidal acts of mass murder like the Hama Massacre, Qamishli Massacre and other massacres of the Syrian civil war.

Jayalalithaa- Punarvasu Rising (Shatabhisha Sun & Magha Moon)

She was the Chief Minister of the state of Tamil Nadu in India and was an actor turned politician who had a cult following (they called her "Amma" or "mother" which I think is interesting that she was this mother figure/matriarch because of Punarvasu's deity Aditi being the Cosmic mother). She was a corrupt politician but the masses largely overlooked this and she was known for being a bit of a tyrannical figure who expected absolute loyalty from her party members who often publicly prostrated before her (not kidding).

Not as brutal as some of the other people on this list but her personality cult and influence over her following is crazyyy (I'm Indian so I'd know) and when she died in 2016, her state observed a 7 day mourning period.

Mata Amritanandamayi Devi- Vishaka Rising (she also has Hasta Sun👀)

She's an Indian spiritual guru known as the "hugging saint", she's still alive and has millions of followers and there hasn't yet been a proper expose but her cult has been controversial for ages especially after it started recruiting spiritually confused white people into its mix. A lot of it is unexplained, she's most definitely a millionaire at this point and we have no idea what actually goes on behind closed doors. Many of the alleged miracles that she has performed have been debunked on many occasions. To think that she has football stadiums full of people who worship her and think she's the divine incarnate is sooo crazy

Ram Dass- Punarvasu Rising

He helped popularize yoga and Eastern spirituality in the West. I don't think he's cruel or shady, just a regular white guy who had a spiritual awakening in India and co-opted thousands of years of Vedic wisdom and teachings to "introduce" it to the West. But his influence is unmatched to say the least, he spearheaded a whole movement and made eastern spirituality mainstream in the west. This is a manifestation of Jupiter's boundless nature.

Oppenheimer- Punarvasu Moon

the man who developed the first ever nuclear weapons was a Punarvasu lol

he truly believed that he was doing the "right thing" because (you already know all this if you watched the movie) Germany was bound to develop these weapons and cause mass destruction and Oppenheimer thought he was on the right side of history by making these weapons for America and by extension for the Allies

"After Germany's surrender in 1945, some scientists questioned the bomb's relevance. Oppenheimer believed it would end the ongoing Pacific War and save Allied lives. The Trinity test is successful, and President Harry S. Truman orders the atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, resulting in Japan's surrender. Though publicly praised, Oppenheimer is guilt-ridden and haunted by the destruction and mass fatalities. After Oppenheimer expresses his guilt to Truman, the president berates him and dismisses his plea to cease further atomic development." (this is an excerpt from the movie's wiki lol)

it just goes to show how self-belief isn't a good thing on its own because you can make yourself believe anything. I guess Oppenheimer's guilt has to count for something ??? Idk how many people mentioned on this list felt guilt because of the destruction they caused, Oppenheimer had a conscience et.al

Elon Musk, Punarvasu Rising

He is the richest man in the world and is on a quest to own everything he can and colonize Mars, need I say more? Idk if this is a strange manifestation of Punarvasu's deity Aditi being the Cosmic Mother (either that or the man has a breeding kink) but this guy procreates at the speed of light (he has 6 kids right now with 3 different women I believe)

Tommy Mottola- Punarvasu Sun (Swati Moon)

the asshole who trapped Mariah Carey (Punarvasu Moon) in a hellish controlling marriage for 8 years. He was the CEO of Sony Music in the 90s and was known for being a megalomaniac (look up his feud with Michael Jackson) he has ruined the careers of many and is known in the music industry for being a really scary controlling maniac

Anders Behring Breivik- Punarvasu Rising

He blew up a bomb in the centre of Oslo. Meanwhile went to an island where a political youth gathering was taking place. Dressed up as a cop he would kill 69 people on the island of Utøya, and call out to teenagers hiding saying it was safe to come out, those who believed him and came out were shot.

Alfred Hitchcock- Vishaka Moon (also Shatabhisha Rising with a lot of Moon influence in his chart)

He basically stalked some actresses and tried to control their lives; told them what they could/couldn’t eat, and where they could/couldn’t go. He sent Tippi Hedren inappropriate Valentine's letters. She claims he threw himself atop her in a hotel room and kissed her — and in her biography accused him of sexual assault. Yet another Jupiterean megalomaniac.

Al Capone- Purvabhadrapada Rising

 He joined the Five Points Gang as a teenager and became a bouncer in organized crime premises such as brothels. In his early twenties, Capone moved to Chicago and became a bodyguard and trusted factotum for Johnny Torrio, head of a criminal syndicate that illegally supplied alcohol—the forerunner of the Outfit—and was politically protected through the Unione Siciliana. A conflict with the North Side Gang was instrumental in Capone's rise and fall. Torrio went into retirement after North Side gunmen almost killed him, handing control to Capone. Capone expanded the bootlegging business through increasingly violent means, but his mutually profitable relationships with Mayor William Hale Thompson and the Chicago Police Department meant he seemed safe from law enforcement.

Capone apparently revelled in attention, such as the cheers from spectators when he appeared at baseball games. He made donations to various charities and was viewed by many as a "modern-day Robin Hood". However, the Saint Valentine's Day Massacre, in which seven gang rivals were murdered in broad daylight, damaged the public image of Chicago and Capone, leading influential citizens to demand government action and newspapers to dub Capone "Public Enemy No. 1".

Robert DeNiro played Al Capone in The Untouchables (1987)

Idk whats the link between PBP and the mafia but Scorsese (PBP Moon) has made manyyy mafia themed movies and Robert DeNiro (PBP Moon) has starred as a mob boss on multiple occasions.

Having Jupiter influence really is like having unwielded power and if a native isn't mature enough to channel it appropriately then they can easily lose themselves to malignant narcissism, god complex and megalomania.

It requires a great deal of wisdom to wield this ability wisely and for the greater good

Jupiter influence is very prominent in the charts of royalty, another group prone to megalomania and god complexes lol. Jupiter bestows its natives with power, status and affluence but one must wield it carefully.

Punarvasu is widely accepted as the most auspicious of Jupiter-ruled naks (due to its themes and its deity) whereas Vishaka and Purvabhadrapada are both harsher manifestations of Jupiterean energy but even the most "gentle" of Jupiterean naks still came up in the charts of some of the horrible people I mention in this post. Basically, no one is exempt from being cruel, obviously, everything depends on the chart as a whole (a person is more than the sum of their parts) but that said the presence of a nakshatra considered "auspicious" (Jupiter ruled or otherwise) does not automatically qualify as some kind of redeeming quality lol. Everybody has to consciously choose their actions and be good and do good aka anybody can be cruel and evil and yes even Jupiter has its dark side/shadow.

hope this post was interesting xx

[mixelation]

Ok so how would akatsuki!minato work? I am now intrigued

my thinking is:

minato is becoming increasingly torn about his own village loyalty bc the fall out of his "kill 1000 ninja" thing is messier than in canon. konoha is actively overworking him and tori is like "dude, they are trying to kill u" and then they DO try to kill his beloved girlfriend. also i think i will kill his genin teammates off screen so he's additionally upset about that

i think the way i want to deal with madara is minato comes back from two training sessions with team 7 and is like "I LOVE THEM I WANT KIDS NOW" and tori is like "......(deep sigh) well okay if obito MUST live you might want to pre-empt some things. go kill this man in a cave." and then she's also like "oh he might be an unkillable monster, you should bring me" and minato is obviously not taking his civillian gf to a fight if he can help it so he loops in orochimaru instead. the fallout is minato discovers uchiha madara alive in a cave and so he's convinced tori is maybe some sort of witch, and then also both orochimaru AND tori are both like "lmao, omg, don't let danzo know" and even jiraiya is like "yyyyyeah don't do that" and now minato is like ??? about konoha higher ups

minato & tori do start to have conversations about the future, and tori is like "i just want a comfortable life where i can fuck around and commit sins against nature in peace" and minato is like "a house? i can buy us a house. it has to be in konoha though" but tori is ummm a known wildly dangerous and confusing variable so it's unlikely she could just casually move to konoha and get to do whatever she wants there. UNLESS, she points out, minato just becomes hokage. being hokage has never occurred to minato before, but he's not humble enough to think he couldn't do it. so he's like "well, okay,"

however minato's name is off the short list for hokage due to his shady side activities (like killing a bunch of people on tori's behalf, and then the people sent to kill tori just disappear and minato is pretending like nothing happened). so they have to do some intense maneuvering to get his name back on this list

tori: hey i think it would be cool and sexy to free Ame and potentially end the war and get you hero points. oh and i think danzo is working with hanzo so like. we could just get rid of him jiraiya: wait WHAT

orochimaru is WEIRDLY helpful because he understands how easily this could just blow up in their faces and then his road to hokage is obstacle free. yeah let's fuck around with rain politics. why not???

they end up co-opting akatsuki-the-rebel group

minato does not become hokage but he does end up in charge of another village. so. uh. success?

[ham1lton]

wait i have a nepo baby headcanon not a political one but more succession style. nepo baby!yn whose family owns the company that owns formula 1 (like bernie ecclestone but like not a terrible racist obvi) (or liberty media but obviously something else IDK)

so she’s been around it forever and she’s grown to have a reckless party girl image (partying with kendall jenner, lily rose depp, drug allegations you get it) but she’s actually v smart and on the board of f1 and is key in making decisions

she didn’t really start making decisions until her 20s when her family made her clean up her act and the dilfs are like wow i haven’t seen you in forever. last time i saw you you were sneaking out of a corporate dinner at your parents’ house 😉

and the current grid is like terrified of her. scared but turned on

(if you don’t like the dads best friend/age gap/‘known the reader since she was young but now she’s grown up and hot’ trope then you can change it to they know who she is but never interacted until she was like. 24 lol)

but since you said you were watching gilmore girls i do imagine a scene from that show but where there’s an F1 gathering at her parents’ house but she doesn’t know cos she doesn’t live there anymore but she does to her old room and finds like 3 drivers in there bc they’re pissed off at something happening downstairs. she opens the door and says can i come in? and the drivers are like well. it’s your room. (like in the episode rory’s birthday parties hahahah)

sorry this is so long LMAO 💘

WAIT THIS IS ACTUALLY SO FUN.

if i was to write it, i’d probably change the idea that she is publicly helping to run it because i don’t think that’s realistic. but maybe her dad or something is like ‘i want to do (insert idea)’ and yn overhears it while drinking a cocktail at 10am (because it’s six pm somewhere) and she’s like ‘shit idea, do (insert better idea)’ and the dad is like ‘no, as if i’m listening to my problematic ass daughter’. so he tells his advisors like ‘lmfaooo dumb idea right’ but they’re like ‘that actually works sm better. the original idea was your daughter’s one… right?’ and the dad is like ‘oh… yes!! lol!! exactly 😅’

idk why but logan comes to my head and he’s at yn’s family estate or something for a f1 related night and he’s like … fuck i need to hide somewhere for some fresh air and time alone. so he runs into a room and shuts the door behind him. he’s like phew!!! alone at last. only to hear a lighter switch and he sees reader in her room maybe smoking? maybe lighting something on fire to do it.

and he’s like … um who tf are you?? and she’s like ‘this is my room 🤨 who the fuck are you???’ and he’s like ‘um no it’s not. there are only two people who here. (yn’s dad’s name) and his daughter but she’s at boarding school’ and she’s like ‘by boarding school, they meant rehab and i’m back. i’ve been back for a while. i’m just not showing my face downstairs. i think dad’s relieved honestly.’ and then they start to chat - maybe about expectations placed on them by themselves and others? idk why i’m thinking this scenario. can be romantic or platonic up 2 you.

but i definitely think the dilfs knowing her growing up might be slightly weird for some readers so maybe, she’s just been sent from place to place for wild behaviour so they know she exists but they’ve never seen her - like u said!!

[kyouka-supremacy]

The thing about how Atsushi deals with Akutagawa is. Atsushi has always been terrified of retailing against his oppressors: to him, his oppressors were always in positions of power that he found impossible to rebel against. Akutagawa, on the other hand, was the first person Atsushi met who was socially accepted to fight back against. Akutagawa was presented to him as the big bad guy, everyone's evil enemy. Atsushi's got personal beef with him for how he treated Kyouka (which is very important for Atsushi, because if he never had it within him to stand for himself, at least he can stand for others). The person Atsushi looks up to the most repeatedly and unapologetically mistreats Akutagawa. Then mistreating Akutagawa must be allowed, right?

It's truly remarkable how despite the guess one would take judging from their good side / evil side affilations, more often than not it's Atsushi going for Akutagawa's throat than the other way round. Sure, Akutagawa threatens to kill Atsushi all the time– but that's exactly the point‚ he never actually follows through‚ and his real actions actually end up telling us his intentions are quite the opposite (re: “I won't kill you today because you look miserable” *saves Atsushi's life* *saves Atsushi's life* *dies to save Atsushi's life*). On the contrary, Atsushi's ALWAYS trying to attack Akutagawa both verbally and physically. Remember that time in chapter 51 when Dazai was keeping them separate? Back then, Akutagawa very much wasn't the one actively trying to attack the other. Not to mention the “You fight 'cos you want to be feared– that's far more worthless in my book” and of course the “It's no wonder Dazai-san chose to abandon you and disappear”. There's even the “if a fight is what you want, then I'll take you on” like lmao, of course you will. The thing is, Atsushi has always found it socially acceptable to retail against, loathe, fight and hurt Akutagawa no-guilt-attached like he never had the chance to with any other abuser. Please keep in mind how thanks to Dead Apple we know that the only other time Atsushi ever fought back someone who was hurting him, it was a most instinctive and involuntary reaction that ended up with him killing them and which gave him several trauma and unresolved self-hatred and feeling of guilt for life.

But hurting Akutagawa, that's peer approved. And it sounds quite cruel, and Atsushi is a fundamentally selfish character, yet it must have come off as so refreshing and even liberating for him to finally have someone he can openly hate, someone he could drop the facade of the polite, harmless guy in front of. That's why I can actually find it believable that Atsushi would, very subconsciously, look forward to fight against Akutagawa; as a way to let off steam, you know? A chance to finally stop acting and start behaving like his true self, determined, brave, protective, a bit of a prick. Not to mention, fights against Akutagawa seemingly always end up as a self-esteem boosts for Atsushi in a way or the other. That's why I wonder: if Akutagawa is the only person Atsushi can be himself with, if he's the only one he can act natural around without feeling he has to put up a front for; what about when Atsushi will stop hating him? Which doesn't sound that unlikely, I mean, after chapter 88 and everything. I'm not saying he's going to forgive Akutagawa for everything he's ever done but like... The perception Atsushi has of him must have changed to an extent, his judgement shifted at least a tiny bit. Then, Atsushi will be left with only one person he can freely be himself with, and he doesn't even hate him that much anymore. Just thinking about that.

[honeyedmiller]

Could you do a pedro fic where you’re a very famous actress and dating him and you’re doing interviews all day and he surprises you by interviewing you but all the questions he asks are really random and funny while he’s being super serious??

this is so cute I can just imagine his goofy ass doing this LMAO. thank u for sending in this request!<3

warnings: none other than fluff

[not revised. sorry if there’s any mistakes.]

“Alright y/n, last interview of the day.” Your manager Maria assured you. You were exhausted from doing interviews all day back-to-back, but it was only because a new rom-com movie you starred in with your beloved boyfriend, Pedro, was coming out in theaters soon.

He was out and about all day as well doing his own set of interviews. But, you two had been texting each other sweet messages back and forth all day, saying that you both couldn’t wait to be in each other’s arms by day’s end.

“Let’s get you to hair and makeup real quick before you meet the interviewer.” Maria says, and you comply. Sometimes you felt like your life was just going with the notions, never getting a chance to properly breathe.

You loved your job so much and were so incredibly grateful for the opportunities you’ve had to get you this far into your career, and adored all of your fans who continued to support you and show you endless amounts of love. But, with all that, exhaustion was a huge price to pay.

You yawn as you plopped down into the glam chair, shaking hands and introducing yourself to the glam squad that was in the building. You only needed some touch-ups, so the process didn’t take very long. You checked your outfit one more time, which was a pair of dark wash mom jeans, black heeled booties, and a black bodysuit. You had on gold accessories to compliment the simple outfit that you felt comfortable in. You all met the producers and camera crew, introducing yourself to them as well. Even if you didn’t need an introduction, you always thought it was polite to greet people in such a way.

You didn’t see the interviewer yet, and one of the crew people told you they’d be there shortly. You sat in your designated seat, pulling out your phone to see a text from Pedro.

I miss you honey. Wish I could see your beautiful face.

You smile at his text, starting to type back before someone covered your eyes from behind you. You yelped in surprise, the crew laughing at the moment they witnessed unfold before them. You were about to move the stranger’s hands from your eyes, but the very familiar cologne filled your nose.

You gasp and move their hands, looking up to confirm your suspicions.

“Baby, what are you doing here?” You laugh as your boyfriend had the biggest smile on his face.

“What do you mean? I’m here to interview y/n about a movie she’s starring in.” A mischievous grin spread across his lips, and you can’t stifle a laugh.

“Are you for real?” Your eyes scan the crew, and they all smile and shrug as if they had no idea this was going to happen. “Well played, Pascal. Well played.” You nudge him and give him a kiss on the cheek before he takes his seat across from you, a stack of cue cards in his hands.

You cross your right leg over your left, folding your hands into your lap as your focus is brought solely to the beautiful man sitting in front of you.

“Everybody ready?” The cameraman calls out, before they cue Pedro to start the interview.

“Hi, my name is Pedro Pascal and with me today I have the lovely y/f/n y/l/n.” His voice is professional and unwavering as he looks at you like a real interviewer.

“Hi everyone.” You wave to the camera, facing back to Pedro. You quirk an eyebrow as he clears his throat, looking down at the cue cards.

“So, y/n, you have a new rom-com movie hitting theaters soon. Do you find your co-star unbelievably sexy?” He asks you with a straight face, and even when you burst into laughter, he didn’t falter.

“Yes, very much so.” You answer, a giggle still in your tone.

“Would you happen to say he was a phenomenal kisser?” He quirks an eyebrow at you expectantly. You wanted to tease him a little, so you put your hand into a fist and rest it under your chin, elbow resting on your knee.

“Hmm. He’s a bit sloppy sometimes. He doesn’t like to keep his tongue in his mouth.” You exasperated, causing the crew to laugh. Pedro knew you were just teasing, mainly because you’ve always been very vocal about how much you absolutely love his kisses. He was a phenomenal kisser, indeed.

“I think he’s a great kisser, thank you very much.” Pedro sassed back at your response, sending you into another fit of laughter.

“So there’s some sexy scenes in the movie,” Pedro starts, and this makes you blush.

“Yeeeaaahhh?” You drag out, eyeing him suspiciously. How he’s kept a straight face throughout all of this is astounding to you, considering these questions were quite unhinged.

“Which one’s your favorite?” He leans forward, both his eyebrows raised as he looks at you expectantly.

“The one where my sexy co-star is on top of me.” You decide to play along with his scheme at this point.

“That’s all of them, though.” He squints his eyes at you, and you nod.

“Indeed it is.” You proudly grin as you notice Pedro squirm a bit in his chair.

“So, you’re one of the world’s most famous actresses. The world needs to know, do you put your toilet paper on the roll so it’s hanging off the top, or the bottom?” Pedro’s seriousness in these ridiculous questions had you wondering how in the world anyone ever agreed to let him do this. He was so goofy, and the way he didn’t falter or break his seriousness in this made it even more astounding.

“The top.”

“Now here’s a serious question. What’s your bank account information? For scientific purposes?” He quirks an eyebrow up at you and you can’t help but roll your eyes playfully.

“If you wanted me to get you your hundred shots of espresso over ice, you could’ve just asked, honey.” You laugh as his expression finally changes from serious to a huge grin, and you turn to the camera.

“That’s it for now folks, gotta get this old man his coffee before he really loses it.” You wink at the camera and the crew collectively laughs. You stand up and put your arms on either side of Pedro’s chair so you’re hovering over him.

“Funny prank you pulled today, Pascal.” His cheeky grin doesn’t disappear as he smiles proudly up at you.

“Thanks for calling me old, by the way.” He scoffs and nudges your arm slightly.

“You know I’m just teasing. I love you baby.” You lean down so your nose brushes his.

“I love you more.” He kisses you tenderly, pulling apart after a few seconds, smiling up at you.

“How ‘bout that coffee now, hm?”

[altocat]

I had a really weird dream last night which was like. Final fantasy 7 except after sephiroth killed the president of shinra and fucked off an empty nester middle aged mom bumped into him and went "you don't have any parents???? Ok come home with me young man" and just sort of forcibly adopted him.

And by the time cloud and co caught up with him he'd completely chilled out and was like "hey man sorry about the everything, i wasn't at my best you know? I didn't have a proper support net so when I crashed and burned i crashed and burned HARD. Anyway my new mom wants to know if you want to come over for a casserole" and then they went to sephiroth's mom's house for a casserole- cloud said nothing the whole time but Barrett was exceedingly polite and kept complimenting the food and also the fact that this lady had been willing to adopt, he was all like "these days there's too many kids without anyone- people like you are what makes the world go round" and Aerith kept talking about how she'd been adopted too. Cloud kept trying to draw his sword and tifa kept taking his hand off of it.

After a while of polite conversation the game faded to black and a popup said "Sephiroth's mom, Sequentia has joined the party!" And weirdly, out of all of this, that was the bit that woke me up because i went "Hold on, Sequentia isn't a real name"

There's no moral or anything to this, I haven't even played the game in months I just had this dream woke up like ???? and went "hey, i know someone who loves hearing about sephiroth getting up to stuff. I should tell them about it before I forget any of the absurd details, they'd get a kick out of this"

LMAO that's what I call a happy ending for Seph.

I mean he still murdered everyone in Nibelheim and is crimes are most definitely still left unanswered but LOOK AT HIM living his best life, making progress thanks to a helping hand 💗💗💗💗

I wish I could have Seph dreams. I never get to have any fun 😭

[bones-of-a-rabbit]

Some betrothed/royalty au doodles, ft. Reader soothing Eclipse during one of his stressed-to-the-point-of-breaking-down-moments, and the first time Reader met Sun (and, not realizing who he was or that he was a royal, decided to start happily chatting with him as if they were on the same level, which caught Sun off guard lmao)

Some betrothed/royalty AU tidbits n info below the cut!

- Reader is a footman! Or,, lady in waiting. Or foot,,person,,, in waiting. Whatever the gender neutral version is, they’re that to Eclipse!

- They’ve known Eclipse for a long time! They were born to a servant who worked in his castle, and tended to follow their mother around as she worked- occasionally crossing paths with Eclipse, and sometimes playing games with him when he was avoiding his tutoring or responsibilities sjdhdjd

- They’re smart and practical, and Eclipse wants to make them his advisor as soon as he has the jurisdiction to do so. They’re very good at seeing the issues politicians debate over from the outside view, one of the people, but also can keep in mind what the political side to an issues is, and Eclipse often asks them what they think when they’re alone and considers it very unfair that their voice would never be taken seriously if brought up at the table.

- Eclipse has had a crush on them for a while lmao

- Also he’s over protective and jealous and has broken at least one(1) bone in defending reader from a rude servant or pushy royal lol :3

- (he has extensively researched ways he could possibly marry Reader without making the entire kingdom hate them n call them a manipulative vex for it)

- Sun and Moon overlook two neighboring kingdoms and have been ‘betrothed’/co-ruling them for a long time! Eclipse’s counsel has decided it would be a good idea to have Eclipse, when he takes charge of his kingdom, be the third to this ally-ship and make a trifecta of three countries that can act as one

- So they’re not really BETROTHED betrothed, but the social implication is basically the same lmao

- (none of them r super thrilled, Eclipse especially lmaoooo)

- Reader first meets Sun separately from Moon, and assumes he’s just a fellow servinghand at the banquet being held to celebrate Eclipse n Sun n Moon meeting under the same roof for the first time

- They start chatting with him like it’s no big deal and he’s so used to ppl being all kiss-ass or backhanded that he can’t stop thinkin abt it for days

- They meet Moon in the garden! They show him their favorite spots and a small patch of blue violets they’ve been trying to cultivate

- When they realize who Sun and Moon are, they just about die on the spot from pure societal horror

- They try to apologize in a thousand different ways, but Sun n Moon, more than a little intrigued/smitten with them, both won’t have it and encourage them to be just as they were

- Before Sun n Moon realize they have feelings for Reader, they realize ECLIPSE has feelings for Reader, and, definitely not bc they r big jealous and also in love with Reader, make it their personal mission to cockblock make sure Eclipse never has the chance to confess or have an almost-kiss with Reader

- Reader loves Eclipse! When that love turned romantic is unsure, and how they’ve been able to cope is by Not Acknowledging The Feelings At All and also denial lmao. When they start to crush on Sun n Moon, they can’t rlly deny the feelings anymore and have several existential and romantic themed crises over it

- None of the boys tell each other about their feelings for Reader bc they all just messy like that <3

- When they all end up confessing to Reader, it’s separately and secretly, and Reader is so shocked that they just say “HHUH UM YYEA I LIKE U ALSO” without thinking

- So now they have three secret royalty bfs and have several more existential crises about whether this is cheating and how in the good golly fuck they got THIS many sweet mans all 🥺👉👈 over them

THATS ALL I GOT FOR NOW LOL OK BYE SORRY FOR LENGTH N RAMBLES

[callmearcturus]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by @lo-fi-charming

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 82, 83 if you include the one I wish I hadn't orphaned.

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 2,721,477 words

3. What fandoms do you write for? Oh boy. Homestuck, The Magnus Archives, Mission Impossible, Borderlands, Welcome to Night Vale. Some one-offs in other fandoms. First really cut my teeth on The Dresden Files.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? Let's seeeee.

dustsceawung (The Magnus Archives) with 4,600 kudos

a steady hand, a delicate man (The Magnus Archives) with 3,316 kudos

dripping with alchemy (Borderlands) with 2,663 kudos

The Eurydice Suite (Homestuck) with 2,164 kudos

I'll bring the motion (The Magnus Archives) with 2,163 kudos

5. Do you respond to comments? When I have something fun or interesting to say, yeah. I don't wanna just say "thanks!" on every comment so I tend to try to repay the comment with a tidbit or something?

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Hmmm. See I'm a Happy Ending Guaranteed kind of writer so I don't know. Maybe we float before the sea at dusk because it's technically a bad end?

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? GOD that's hard... I think maybe all the world is earth and water or the Five Years Later ending of The Eurydice Suite.

8. Do you get hate on fics? Not anymore. 8)

9. Do you write smut? what's smut never heard of her

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I'm going to choose to interpret this as "fusions" instead of "crossovers" and in that case I have written....

Homestuck/Inception (The Eurydice Suite), Homestuck/Kinda Sorta John Wick (so we don't kill the ones we love), Homestuck/Fallout New Vegas (out here the good girls die), and WTNV/Good Omens (all plans are golden in your hands)

Out of those, I think the New Vegas one is the most out-of-left-field.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? By now, at least 10 times that I'm aware or.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? A few times, yep! Russian and Ukrainian I think.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? BOY HAVE I.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? I despise this question and if this question had a face, I would punch it. I assume this has to be a ship I have written since this is a writing questionnaire.

In my heart of hearts, it's Karkat and Kanaya. I enjoy their platonic love more than any romance pairing....

SEE THE PROBLEM WITH THIS QUESTION is that I... think for me personally, the pairing is a vehicle of the wider story/themes, so I can't say "Oh its DirkJake" because to me the KTOWL DirkJake is wildly different from, like, TES DirkJake.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? The barely-inspired-by-Hellboy AU that I should probably just write as an original story. But I won't because I'm a coward, lmao.

16. What are your writing strengths? Consistency and structure, I think. I'm a tradesperson, not an artist.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I feel like I lack a lot of foundational material that other artists have due to my lack of education and just generally not knowing things. Like, the kind of works I personally admire and learn the most from, I lack the toolset to create myself, which is constantly frustrating.

Structure is sometimes a shackle, and I often feel like I can't execute something truly Artistic because to me, writing is a trade, not an art.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I do this sometimes and lemme tell you, every single fucking time I do, I rigorously check everything.

Like, I recently agonized over whether a character would use Verzeihung versus Entschuldigung in a fic, and that was a solid hour of research. Worth it tho!

I'm of the opinion that if you're just going to use google translate or something, then I would elect to write it as ["Excuse me," he said in overly-polite German as he passed], but that's me.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Uuuuuuuuh ppppppprobably Gundam Wing or something? Way back in the era when you could post smut on FF.Net.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? Could it be anything other than KTOWL? Honestly.

I am taggingggggg @arquiving and @interropunct

[persephonewritessometimes]

Moon Song / part six: punisher

Summary: A peek into Y/N's and Hotch's relationship three years later.

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x (AFAB) Reader

Word Count: 2445

Warnings: proposal, pregnancy, wedding, happy and in love!hotch&reader, brief mention of sex

Playlist: Link

Author's Note: Thank you all for reading! I have a little surprise that will be going up sometime soon (bonus chapter lmao because I can't get enough of moon song!hotch) Thank you for all the likes, comments, and reblogs, I see them all and I'm so grateful. <3

This work is meant for readers aged 18 and over. You are responsible for your own media consumption.

Three years. Three years of therapy. Three years of working cases together. Three years of Hotch trying not to burst a blood vessel when officers attempted to ask me out, and I politely shut them down. Three years of co-parenting. And three years of learning how to communicate and love each other in a healthy way. It wasn’t easy, not one part of it, but it was worth it. Because we’re okay. Better than okay, actually. We made it out. Together. With minor casualties of course, but we fucking made it.

         Haley married Todd two years ago, and they welcomed a little girl named Emma about a year ago. Haley and I have become friends, she helped me learn what it’s like to be a mom and I go to her when I have questions about Jack and how to handle certain situations. She lets me babysit Emma too, and I’m obsessed with that little girl. It makes me wonder what my life would have been like if I hadn’t had a miscarriage.

         I’m getting ready to go out for dinner, and since JJ had hinted that I might want to look nice I slipped into a pretty sky-blue dress. Aaron is downstairs putting away the dishes, I can tell that because it’s louder than all get out. He tries to be gentle, but I think he just hates putting the dishes away, so he rushes to get them done as fast as possible. Since he’s preoccupied, I dig around in the under-the-sink cabinet, reaching for a box in the back. I rip open the pregnancy test, pee in a cup, and wait. I’d been feeling off lately, my period was a few days late, and I just wanted to make sure. A couple of minutes pass and I turn the test over.

         “AaRON?” My voice cracks as I shout his name.

         “Coming!” He shouts back and I hear him jog up the stairs. He pushes the door open and sees my hands shaking. “Y/N, what’s wrong?” I can hear the panic in his voice.

         “I’m pregnant,” I whisper, picking up the positive test on the counter and showing him. I watch him closely, as several emotions flash over his face and he’s trying to hold back a grin, always waiting for my reaction.

         “And how do you want me to feel about that? Whatever you want to do, I’m on board with you one hundred percent.”

         “I want this baby so fucking bad,” I say, starting to cry. “After the first one, I felt so lost. I thought I would never get pregnant again.” He grabs my hand and squeezes it tightly.

         “I was going to wait to do this until we got to dinner, but I think the universe is telling me to do it now.” I watch as he gets down on one knee, fishing a small box out of his pocket. I start to cry even harder.

         “Oh my god, you are not – what – I – “

         “Y/N Y/LN, will you do me the biggest honor of my life? Will you marry me?”

         “Yes! Oh my god yes, of course!” He slides the ring on my finger, gets up, and kisses me deeply, not seeming to mind that I can’t stop crying and my nose is running. We break apart and he rests his forehead on mine, a hand on my stomach.

         “Whatever happens, no matter what, I will be here for you, always. I’m never leaving. You are my heart; you are my home. I love you.”

         “I love you too,” I whisper thickly. He kisses my forehead, then bends down and kisses my abdomen. I laugh and the smile he shoots me is so bright I almost feel like I could fall over from the force of it.

         “Okay, so you have two options. The dinner we originally planned where there may be some familiar faces.” He winks at me, and I laugh again. “Or, we can call it a night, have some steamy sex, and watch a movie?”

         “Wow, that’s a hard choice.” I pause, then say, “Let’s go see our friends.” I take a step back to wipe my tears and blow my nose. “But I’m still expecting steamy sex later, regardless.” He laughs loudly and promises that he’ll live up to my request. I smooth my dress down as he dials someone on his phone.

         “JJ, change of plans. I may have already proposed so no need to be incognito.” He says, smiling at me.

         “Dammit!” We hear Reid shout in the background.

         “Oh, thank god, Reid’s insistence on a fake mustache has made him insufferable,” JJ says, chuckling.

         “We’re leaving in a few, see you then.” He says, hanging up the phone. “Are you okay?” He asks, looking me over.

         “Yeah, just a lot of big things at once,” I say with a soft smile.

         “Need a moment alone? I can get the car ready.”

         “If you wouldn’t mind,” I say.

         “Of course, pretty girl. I’ll be downstairs. I love you!” He retreats, softly closing the door behind him. I look at myself in the mirror, I look down at my stomach, there’s no visible difference, but I feel different.

         “What if I told you I feel like I know you, but we’ve never met?” I whisper down to my belly, smoothing my hands over it. I feel tears prick at the corner of my eyes, happy tears, and I put my shoes on before joining Aaron in the garage.

We drive to my favorite Italian place around the corner. “You really pulled out all the stops, didn’t you?”

“Anything for the love of my life.” He says, squeezing my knee.

“Oh my god, you are so sappy!” I say, resting my hand over his.

“I can’t help it; you make me weak in the knees.” We pull up at the restaurant, and he parks the car. We walk inside to the team yelling “CONGRATULATIONS!” I laugh and show off my ring, Aaron’s hand resting on the small of my back.

“Can we please eat for the love of god? You guys took forever to get here.” Morgan groans.

“Watch how you talk about my fiancé, Morgan,” Hotch says, glaring at him. Morgan holds his hands up in mock defeat and we all take a seat at the table that had been prepared for us. Hotch is seated to my right, and JJ is to my left. I lean over to say something in JJ’s ear while the rest of the team talks loudly.

“I’m pregnant,” I say, loud enough so she can hear me but no one else can. Her head whips around so fast, eyes wide. I laugh and nod, and she grabs my hand.

“Congratulations, Y/N!” She says in my ear. I beam at her.

“Who knew that it would turn out this way three years ago?” I say, and she gives me a sly smile but says nothing. I wonder what she has up her sleeve.

-7 months later-

         The wedding is beautiful – everything I wanted it to be and more. It’s a pretty small wedding, we only wanted our closest friends and family there. My sister and her husband came, as well as my parents even though they were traveling abroad at the time. Haley and Todd came, and they kept an eye on Jack during the ceremony. I’m in love with the dress I picked out – it’s an off-white color and is loose in the belly – something I knew I would need. I’m waiting for my cue to walk down the aisle, and I smooth my hands over my bump, resting my hands underneath it.

         “You’re glowing,” JJ says. I asked her to be my Matron of Honor, needing someone with a level head to keep me from freaking out. “You have your vows?” I nod, pulling a piece of paper out from the bust area of my dress. She takes it from me, vowing to keep it safe until I need it. Reid walks in and says,

         “Beautiful as ever, Y/N. JJ they’re ready for us to walk down the aisle.” Spencer winks at me, and I smile, mouth suddenly dry. This is really happening. They walk down the aisle, and then my dad is there, offering me his arm and a smile.

         “Breathe. It’s going to be fine; I promise.” He whispers to me, right before we round the corner and walk down the aisle. I take a deep breath and look up, locking eyes with Aaron and he’s crying. I start silently crying, emotional both from the day and the pregnancy hormones coursing through my body. My dad shakes his hand and hands me over. Aaron kisses my forehead, then my belly, and takes my hand. When we get to the vows, Aaron goes first.

         “My beautiful, Y/N. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever see this day. I am not the same person I was three and a half years ago. You have changed me irrevocably and for the better. I close my eyes every night and I dream that I can hold you.” He winks at me, a callback to the letter he sent me, and I laugh. “I never thought that I would get to hold you forever. I promise to always love you, to always put you first, and to always take a bullet for you.” Another wink. “I didn’t think I would get another chance with you, but time and time again, you have surprised me and taught me how to love myself. I can’t imagine doing life without you. I love you.” He wipes my tears, and JJ hands me my vows. My shaking hands unfold the paper, and now it’s my turn.

         “I wasn’t sure what I wanted to say in my vows, as you already know how I feel about you. Then I was afraid I would say too much, and then I wouldn’t know where to start, wouldn’t know when to stop. Everyone knows you’re the way to my heart. I hope that when people look at me, they see the love I have for you, the love I have for our family, and the love I have because of you. I loved you from the first moment we met, and I have loved you every moment since. I promise to never stop loving you, even when you insist on making dinner and burn something, even when you put the dishes away too fast and it sounds like a bull in a china shop, and even when you take a bullet for me. I love you so much that I didn’t even know how to put everything in words.” I fold my paper back up and look up at him, wiping his tears, and he kisses the back of my hand when he’s done. Rossi, who got ordained just for this moment, pronounces us husband and wife, and Aaron’s lips are on mine before Rossi can even finish his sentence. Everyone hollers as Hotch kisses me like we have no audience and when he finally pulls away, I'm breathless.

         The reception starts after we take pictures, and everyone cheers when we walk in. We share our first dance, then take a seat at our private table because I’m starving and could probably eat the whole buffet table at this point. Aaron gets us both a plate, my belly weighing heavy from being on my feet for a while, and I subtly slip my feet out of the flats I was wearing.

         “Eat slowly,” Aaron says, raising his eyebrows at me when he sets my plate down in front of me. I glare at him, but oblige him, nonetheless. He knows me better than I know myself sometimes. I watch the room as we eat, everyone is laughing and having fun, and I’m smiling watching them.

         “I can feel you staring at me, you know,” I say after a few minutes, turning to face Aaron.

         “What, can I not admire my beautiful wife?” I blush, suddenly shy. He leans in to kiss me and I go,

         “Oh my god you can’t kiss me, you’re married!” He pulls away and hisses,

         “Y/N that is not funny! I married to you now, dumbass.”

         “Yeah, I know, but it was funny to me,” I say grinning.

         “You’re evil.”

         “Oh, definitely,” I say, leaning in and kissing him.

         JJ gets up and taps a knife on her cup to get everyone’s attention.

         “Hello everyone, thank you for coming. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m JJ, one of Y/N’s and Hotch’s friends, and I just wanted to give a short speech. When you work with profilers all the time, you start to pick up on things. When Y/N first joined our team, we welcomed her with open arms, and she fit right in. Two weeks into Y/N being at the BAU, our dear friend Spencer Reid, made a one-off comment about Hotch’s body language whenever Y/N is in the room. Hotch, for being section chief, we expected you to be able to keep a secret a lot better.” He laughs, and she continues. “When we in turn looked at Y/N’s body language, the attraction between them was obvious. At that moment, we placed bets on if they would last or not and seeing as we’re at their wedding, I’m pleased to announce I won that bet. Not even our resident genius was certain that Y/N and Hotch would make it out together. I may not be a betting woman, but I’ll always bet on you, Y/N.” She winks at me, and I laugh. “Needless to say, I bought you guys a really nice gift with the money I won, so, you’re welcome!” Aaron and I both laugh at that. “All that being said, I’m thrilled that you two have each other. Everyone who looks at you sees the love you two share, and it’s a beautiful thing to see. Even if it’s hard to work with two people who are constantly swooning over each other. I love you guys.” She nods, and I get up and hug her.

         “Thank you,” I whisper in her ear, “For everything. We wouldn’t be here today if you hadn’t stuck by my side and supported me.” She just squeezes me tight.

         We dance the night away before my eyes start to shut for more than a split second. Aaron calls it a night, and everyone sends us off. He helps me into the car before getting into the driver’s seat.

         “Well, you’re stuck with me forever now, Mr. Hotchner.”

         “And I couldn’t be happier, Mrs. Hotchner.”

---

bonus chapter!

---

TAG LIST (want to be added? click here!): @helmihotchner @hausofwhores @stxlemate @heidss @justjoyceme @bxtchopolis @art-and-thoughts @morgthemagpie @rousethemouse @ssamorganhotchner @mrs-ssa-aaron-hotchner @sebastiansstanswhore

[bricommissions]

hi, i’m sen (she/her, 25) and i’d like to request a genshin impact matchup!

my romantic preference is that everyone’s hot, please help. i’m a shortstack musical theater kid stuck in the body of an accountant. i love going down research rabbit holes; i enjoy solving problems and hunting down the misplaced puzzle piece that throws everything else out of balance. but i burn out very easily when doing that, and am actively trying to learn balance. i burn out easily in general, honestly. social engagements require a lot of recharge time in bed after.

i err on the side of politeness in social settings, but my sense of humor is so sardonic it generally comes across as too blunt. still, i try to keep my friends’ spirits lifted with bits and goofs. i also fluster easily and am probably very teasable, lmao.

this is probably more information than you needed/wanted, so i’ll leave two more nuggets: i love spicy food and iced coffee, and my love language is acts of service. i was going to leave three nuggets but couldn't come up with a third, which may be a nugget in and of itself :D

thank you so, so much in advance! we've dm'd recently, so please let me know if there's anything you need from me during the process!

hi hi dear friend sen !! thank you for commissioning me for a paid match-up ♡ your contribution to my writing career & helping me pay my bills means the world to me. thank you so much from the bottom of my heart ♡

DRUM ROLL, PLEASE . . .

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

YOUR MATCH IS : ZHONGLI !!

right away, i could see connections that would blossom between the two of you !! so for the sake of immersion, let's dive into this hypothetical scenario of you living in the world of teyvat ...

you're a traveler who likes to go from nation to nation, but liyue is the destination you travel to the most. you're paying the beautiful nation a visit, & everyone is happy to see you again. you enjoy third round knockout & their delectable beverages. after settling into an inn on the harbor, you immediately head there & order an iced coffee & a small appetizer of the spicy variety - two of your favorites !!

however, for the first time, there is someone sitting at your usual table that you don't recognize. it appears your schedules have finally lined up. this is where you first meet zhongli.

right away, you two hit it off. the conversations never seem to end & he is very curious to learn more about your travels. at one point, some regulars sit beside the both of you & politely tune in. the talk extends into the night ... one key thing you notice is that when you chime in with a rather blunt joke, no one laughs ... except when zhongli suddenly barks out a laugh, clearly a fan of your humor. judging by the reactions of the other tavern-goers, a laugh like this is rare. their faces are quite shocked. it's obvious he's laughing with you & not at you. it gets you a little flustered, but not in a negative way.

the two of you talk into the late hours of the night; long after everyone has left & third round knockout has closed. when the people on the street become fewer & fewer, you both realize it's time to go.

"allow me to walk you back in exchange for your wonderful company tonight, sen," zhongli would insist. & he does walk you back to the inn !! ... for reasons tooootttaaaallllyyyy unrelated, you decide to stay in liyue for a while longer.

what follows is you spending more & more time with zhongli. you take walks amongst liyue's breathtaking nature & solve ancient puzzles out in the wild; not so much for the treasure, but for the intellectual challenge your brilliant minds can team up for. whenever you feel that infamous sensation of burnout, you'll both sit in comfortable silence & enjoy the views ... yes, views ... zhongli is a very hot guy, after all.

he certainly finds you attractive, too. he has a faint blush on his cheeks whenever you're around. hu tao, who you meet in passing due to them being co-workers, is quick to point this out to you when he isn't looking with a wink & a nudge.

zhongli never expected to feel such a way for a mortal, & yet his heart races every time he thinks of you. he adores your focused expression when you speak with him about your research, or the passion in your eyes when you speak about your musical theater days.

on that fateful day when he approaches you with a bouquet of qingxins behind his back & a tender murmur of "sen..." —

well, i'll leave the rest up to your imagination !!

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─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───